#fast day. no caffeine
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lying in bed rotting the day away with a headache
#URGGGGGG#fast day. no caffeine#i can hear my sweet sweet energy drinks singing to me from the fridge#i have so much food in my room it would be too easy...............#dinner in 2.5 hours#i am so weak#need a snack an hour or else i will die
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does anyone else find themselves really motivated and then you get some random health scare and suddenly you feel the urge to eat just to make yourself feel better
#couldn’t breathe earlier#realised it was bc i’d had too much caffeine#wanted to fast all day but now i’m eating dinner to soak it up 😭😭#tw ana diary#disordered eating thoughts#4norexi4#ana trigger#low cal restriction#🕯️as a 🪶#th!nsp0#⭐️ving#th!n$piration
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Kon changes the lyrics of Strawberries and cigarettes to Strawberry Vape Juice to annoy Tim every time he sings it.
(Tim cannot keep having the same argument he wants Nictotine and he’s not gonna fuckin smell/taste like a casino carpet or Jason ergo Vape)
#LMAO is this anything?#jk ik this is something its incredible is what it is#TimKon#DC#Batman#Red Robin#Time Drake#Superman#Superboy#Conner Kent#Kon-El#once again pushing my vaping tim agenda#kon’s gonna make fun of the vaping till the day he dies becuz it’s his right and also he doesn’t have a leg to stand on cuz uh-#he’s got the hots for the vape man so…..#I headcannon that it’s like Tim’s only unhealthy habit like besides an energy drink here and there#cuz let’s be real if Tim wanted caffeine he’d take the pills or straight inject into his arm man is on X games mode he wanna go FAST#but otherwise I imagine Tim is like one of those annoying fitness influencers dudes calorie counting and wakes up to do 2 hrs of cardio
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need these fanmeets to end bc I keep closing photoshop like Ah, last gifs for today! and then i see another video.
#these seungmin videos have to be giffed tho okay#also ive been out of my adhd meds for 5 days so 😋#making gifs and walking around everywhere really fast and consuming caffeine is all i wanna dooooo tonight
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no offense but ummm my fave things in life are drugs and alcohol and yummy lil treats
every. single. day.
thx for understanding
#personal#shit post#but honestly so tru#all i do is wake up#smoke weed and drink caffeine all day#then at night i eat fast food and drink straight vodka#then go to sleep#the struggle is so real when u have no will power#ok to interact#lmao
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i feel broken when i’m having an episode
#i truly feel insane#i am feeling every emotion at once#i’ve noticed that during the peak bad days my emotions cycle soo fast and caffeine definitely makes it worse#especially when i’m in a place where i can’t destimulate#irritability at 100 and literally anything can set me off#girl it’s so embarrassing because i know i’m being irrational and my mood swings are insane but i have such minimal control#medicated again soon 🙏
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i feel like no matter what im always tired!! i get a decent 7-8 hours of sleep each night but every single day im yawning and my eyes are droopy and i feel foggy. literally everyone i know irl knows how sleepy i always am. pls tell me theres a magical cure for this 🙏
#kay natters#i dont do caffeine cuz it fucks up my heart lol#one time i had a small iced vanilla latte and was bedridden for days cuz i thought i was gonna have a heart attack#from how fast my heart was beatin#i eat pretty healthy just prob not as much as i should but even on days i eat a lot i feel the same
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i feel like i am about to become a villain
#did not realize i was hungry. suddenly stomach out of nowhere is ACHING#i hope it’s just hunger as opposed to like. too much caffeine or sickness#both of which could be possible#now i’m shoveling food in my mouth as fast as possible at midnight like hurry up and process this stop hurting#it’s also just been a really rough day and night#buggy wifi#crazy crowds and noise#car accident in front of our place and then shooting reports elsewhere on campus#should be good now and things should be over but like#i’m tired of hearing noises and feeling sensations i wanna turn it all off#it’s only midnight and it feels like this night has been three years long#peach rambles
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since this is the first saturday after The Giggle, and i'm already missing the Doctor and Donna (again)–, i've finally started listening to the Tenth Doctor Adventures from Big Finish and i'm LOVING it.
David and Catherine are as brilliant in it as they always were in the show <3
#listened to 'technophobia' today and it had so many fun moments#the bit with donna refusing to give caffeine to the doctor because he has adhd made me laugh; she's so right#i will try not to power through these too fast and limit myself to one every two days so it lasts me for a while#tim.txt
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Mfw i want to break my fast but i remember some guy on reddit fasts for way longer w ease and doesnt havf anoreixa so im being a bitch and should just keep going bc it’sso easy to just not eat what kind of fatass am i
#it’s so triggering when ppl are like ’’fasting is so easy anyone can do 48 hr fasts if thry just try’’#or even worse ’’everyone can eat 500 cals a day for two weeks’’#bc if i eat 500 for two weeks im jusg being normal#so if i mess up one day i’m worsethan everyone else#and if i cannot fast for two days or more i’m just not trying hard enough#falling asleep tonight will be so rough bc i haven’t eaten and i had 600+ mg of caffeine
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made the mistake of drinking coffeee and now my blood is bees. im a wind up toy being held in place and i might be dying help.
#norm.allie#i havent felt this jittery from caffeine in sooooo long#i wish i knew why caffeine does this to me but not every time#like what are the factors that make it worse some days and like fine others#i didnt even drink a large coffee and i didnt drink it too too fast#my arms feel so heavy and i need to be stretched like taffy#i think that would help but i dunno#like this is anxiety inducing levels of caffeine jitters#i wish my tummy didnt hurt :(#also this is the most my hands have physically shook from coffee like maybe ever#so fucking strange
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bleh i'm very very overwhelmed but everything is going to work out. i am going to get these tasks done. it'll all be okay.
#two more days of school. two more days and then it's summer break.#but the last two days are the most stressful to be honest?#i have a lot of final projects due tonight. one of which i haven't even started.#i mean thank god i don't graduate this year. but my future is fast approaching which is just. terrifying.#and my sewing machine was being an asshole and all my hobbies seem so so so overwhelming#and my room is messy and good god i'm so so scared of absolutely nothing.#lesson of the day: caffeine + adhd medication makes me very jittery and anxious and overwhelmed and i should not combine them ever.
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Maybe going on a cut would fix me...
#as long as half my caloric intake is tuna i can get back down to 1500 calories a day#i have enough body fat that i could do thay pretty sustainably for a couple months#then i just need to do ephedrine/caffeine drinks to keep me fasting until 4-5pm and eat 1-2 meals a day#easy peasy#me#my posts
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starting to think this closing in on 80 hour dirty water fast w only monster was a Bad Idea, for some reason.
#my whole body is thrumming bitch i feel like a humvee#i know its not technically a fast like u dont get autophagy results but like fuck it#autophagy seems a little too#overhyoed detox hocus pocus snake oil miracle for me to give too much of a fuck about#also its either the caffeine or like. picking up a kamakazi pilot esque meth habit to give me the strength of will#its ok i break fast in the morning + going to bed soon and i will be cured#the first 2 and a half days were great felt like i could go forever halfway thru the third the crash came out of nowhere
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the slate vanilla lattes are SO good ??
#20g of protein for 100cal + 175mg of caffeine ?#theyre a little low res but theyre sooo tasty#breaking my fast </3#i kind of remembered restriction is easier for me than fasts#so i had a light lunch#dinner will be a protein bar :)#i think im gonna go back to my 500/day#cause i was struggling with 200/day#besides ! im tryin ta get muscles :)#chucumber
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briefly thought i was dying when i was getting ready to go shower bc it felt like I’d suddenly gotten punched straight in the back of the head, back of my throat, and my jaw and ears all at once. like someone just flipped a switch and suddenly owwww :(((( it felt kinda pulsing (the head pain) for about thirty solid seconds and then it just dulled to a small throb where it’s currently at now. legit thought i was having a goddamn stroke in the bathroom buck ass naked and briefly thought ‘aw fuck the emt’s are gonna see my tits’ which was funny that that was my very first thought.
and the head pain isn’t even the whole head. it’s the sides of my forehead and a little bit on the sides of my face. my jaw definitely hurts and so does my ears like when u get an ear infection. the very back of my throat too which is similar to the feeling of strep throat but not actually strep (pretty sure I’m immune to it by now after having literally five times a year every year until i was 19) and yeah the sides of my temple definitely hurt rn. i mean i have been super hoarse for the past five days or so and blowing my nose like crazy in the morning and starting to cough a bit starting earlier today. and I’ve been chugging water for an hour and it’s not helping jack shit so was it rlly just a terribly timed announcement by my body to say i have a sinus infection? or is it a migraine? idk
#literally did scare me for about thirty seconds#like the pain was SO fucking bad that i curled up into a ball on the floor#clutching my head and trying to breathe through the throat pain#and now it’s just kinda. There. also I don’t think me being dehydrated#and eating almost nothing for a few days now is helping#literally the only thing I rlly had today that was considered ‘food’#was the end of a ruffles bag two corn dogs and some fast food#and like. nothing else. literally. plus enough caffeine to probably kill a small child#i’m rlly letting myself go man. i’m literally gonna end up in the hospital#starving and dehydrated to the point of passing out#I need to Get My Shit Together but honestly?#I can’t even be bothered to care about myself and my well being one bit
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