#fandom making my brain hurt

[henrysglock]

Because they blocked me instead of taking it straight from the horse's mouth that they misinterpreted the entirety of Papa Warbucks, I'd like to deconstruct the other things that particular "critique" took issue with, which I had saved to my phone so I could address when I had time. I did that while I had them unblocked/before they blocked me, because honestly I did want them to see my explanations.

Alas, here we are.

Number 1:

This just in. No more daddy kink. Pack it up, guys...let's go home...the kink police are here...

Also, to be clear, it was Henry who did that in PW. It wasn't even something Martin suggested Henry do. Henry's just a little freak who likes to press buttons to see what they do because, in keeping with TFS, Martin refers to his father as Papa. Henry can tell Martin's got daddy issues out the wazoo, it's something they discussed not even half an hour prior, and the poor guy just. blurts it out. It's not like Martin was there rubbing his grubby hands together like "uhuhuhu can I coerce Henry into calling me Papa in bed? uhuhuh". It was very much something on Henry's end.

(However, regarding Henry's button-pushing when he's lacking inhibitions, see also: Henry addressing Martin as "Captain" as a joke, which is a play on the whole "Martin's dad wouldn't approve" thing from earlier in the night. It's a bit.)

Number 2:

Martin Brenner may have been a psychiatrist by trade, but that didn't mean he couldn't recognize a work of art when he saw one.

Martin loved his job, no doubt; the human mind was his passion.

Bro...this is what he does for a living. It's his career. He's never met a puzzle he couldn't solve. He's fascinated by Henry. What a terrible thing. A tragedy, truly, and godawful abuse towards Henry, too. /s

Also, here's the "pouncing on mommy issues and insecurities" in question:

"My mother would say it's one of those ideas that kept me out of the good schools." Oh, there's something. Martin wanted to tug on that thread. A bit daring, especially for a first (and possibly only) date, but it was worth tucking away for later. If there was something he loved, it was taking people apart like puzzles.

"I mean, it was a joke, technically...but it would be kinda interesting to find out what, collectively, is wrong with the lot of us." Martin's reply, in all its blunt, factual glory, was out before he could stop it. "Autism, primarily." The shocked blink that greeted him in the rearview narrowed into amused incredulity as they breezed through the parking lot. "Is this a dinner date or a diagnosis?" Henry snarked, the bite of his tone undermined by the teasing twist of his lips. "Did my mother put you up to this?" Nevermind. Threads exist to be pulled. The backstory lurking behind his date's doe eyes was proving to be an irresistible treat. "That's the second time you've mentioned your mother, Henry. Tell me—is she not pleased that you're attending to the best art school in the country?"

The man literally just wants to know the dirt on Virginia CreeI, yes because it will tell him more about Henry, but also because he's a nosy cunt who likes knowing about the Drama. What a crime. How predatory.

Henry gives it back in kind, though ("Is this a date or a diagnosis?"), and he's very much aware of Martin's tendency to play detective. Henry's not stupid.

Rein it in, idiot. Henry's inner monologue had always been his most scathing critic; it was no different now, as he rounded the front of the town car and willed himself to stop yapping. Forget being trans, this is why no one wants to date you. Remember what Mom said about you and emotional labor? Martin's a psychiatrist, he can smell that stuff a mile away—

And regarding seeing Henry as an experiment, here's the only section where that comes up:

I wonder who made him so reluctant to let people spoil him, Martin thought as he watched the young man across from him fiddle with his napkin. No doubt it's his mother. Perhaps it was the doctor in him, but Henry's attitude towards having money spent on him only made Martin want to dote on him more, to see if he could get him to accept generosity without attaching guilt to it. What had started out as the prelude to one nice meal for a pretty, starving artist was rapidly progressing into a full-fledged experiment, and the best place to start with an experiment was questions. "So, Henry," he broke the brief silence that had fallen between them, "What area of art do you study? Animation, painting..." As expected, the open-ended question had Henry tearing his eyes off the square of maroon fabric in his lap.

The "experiment" in question:

Martin views the thing in general as "how much money can I get away with spending on a nice young man", but there's also a definite aspect of him genuinely liking Henry as a person.

Rather, it was that he had no idea how much he would enjoy Henry’s company on its own, all else aside. He was awkward, obviously, but he was also funny and almost painfully genuine; there was a charm to it all that Martin suspected most people couldn’t evade. "You know, maybe I ought to take you back to Rochester with me after all," he mused, more to himself than to Henry...

Christ. Maybe he wasn't too far off with that basement thing earlier. He shook his head, a little helpless. I met him this afternoon and I'd already like him to be a permanent fixture in my life. I need to get ahold of myself.

And yes, the secret basement laboratory is a running joke. Henry started it.

“Is that funny?” “No! No. I just…You are taking me to dinner, right? You didn’t pick me up at a con to lock me up in your secret underground asylum and study my brain or something, right?” Henry’s giggles slipped into outright laughter, the awkward tension in the car ebbing away as Martin found himself incapable of restraining a smile of his own. “No, Henry. Unfortunately,” he sincerely hoped the young man in his backseat could read the sarcasm in his tone, “I don’t have an underground asylum to lock you away in.” “Oh my God, wouldn’t that be just the thing, though.” Henry cleared his throat and adopted what Martin assumed to be his best impression of a hoity-toity doctor, “‘Longitudinal Study of Midwest Comic-Con Attendees’ Brain Abnormalities’.”

What a travesty, overall. 500 lashes for James Henrysglock.

Number 3:

Girl (gn) please.

It happens 7 times (I re-counted), and one of them was "20-something year old boy" like. That's an adult. You ever heard of older people referring to younger men as boys? People calling it "boy troubles" even when they're in college? No? Okay.

You know how many times Martin refers to Henry as a whole-ass man, though? 12 times.

There's also a whole bit about Martin sitting there worrying because he didn't double check that Henry was old enough to drink. Everyone here knows Henry's a grown ass man.

Mountain of a molehill makin' ass. Christ.

Also, Henry is not at all naive. He knows what he's about.

See:

Henry making the choice, unprompted, to bring protection

He glanced at the bedside digital clock. Seven-ten. He could feel a ball of something nervous and fluttery taking root in the pit of his stomach, the kind that made him feel the need to shake like a wet dog to shed the excess energy. Oh god. Would it be too presumptuous of me to stick a condom in my pocket? He’d never even know if we didn’t…y’know. But if we did, maybe it would come off as thoughtful? Easy? Smart? Full of myself? The clock read seven-fifteen. Henry dug around in his suitcase and produced the single little foil package he’d stuck in there just on the remote chance someone wanted to screw him. It stared him right in the face, pinched between his forefinger and thumb. Better safe than sorry. Right? I should just. Hoo-boy. I’m doing this. Seven-twenty-two. Henry shoved the condom in his front-right pocket as fast as he could, like he was ripping off a band-aid.

Henry reading Martin like a fucking BOOK

Maybe he went into psych stuff to spite his dad, or maybe to figure out what his damage was. Maybe he was an army kid, I know vets aren't always chill about psych stuff. After all, he seems about the right age to have had a dad who went to Vietnam. ... I may have been right about him being a military kid. "What, did he expect you to join the army or something?" "Navy, actually. He was a captain himself, and I suppose he expected I'd follow in his footsteps." Henry wanted to smile at the fact that he'd been right, but he figured it wouldn't exactly be appropriate for the situation and briefly sucked his lower lip into his mouth instead.

What I believe that point from the "critique" is picking up on is that Henry's inexperienced. He's a virgin. He's 21. Thus, he doesn't know how sex normally goes. He's awkward. He doesn't know jack shit about wine selections, other than "cheap and fruity is best".

Also...I'm not sure if OP missed it, but "easily flustered" is one of Henry's BIGGEST character traits. He's a nervous overthinker, a rambler, a dog in a "NERVOUS" vest. He doesn't know how to take praise gracefully. He says cringeworthy things and immediately kicks himself over it.

And yes, Martin thinks it's cute. Because it is cutesy behavior. Read any sugar mommy/daddy fic, and I guarantee they'll see a flustered sugar baby as something worth fawning over. That's part of the genre, I fear.

As for people being under the impression that they're father and son? THAT'S ANOTHER RUNNING JOKE. IT'S A BIT.

It starts in the very first section with Martin being put off by Virginia and thinking that he'd put Henry up in a nicer hotel if he were in her shoes.

“Hilton? God, no. I was lucky my dad talked my mom into putting me up at the ‘8.” If he were my son, he’d be put up in a suite on-site, Martin groused internally. Logically, he knew it was irrational to try and coerce Henry into moving rooms, and that the Hilton likely had no rooms left regardless. That didn’t mean it didn’t irk him anyway.

And then Henry jokes about their age gap re: booze

"D'you think they'll card me?" Maybe Henry wasn't over the legal drinking age, then. It wasn't unheard of for someone to be twenty years old at the end of their junior year. Perhaps Henry was born in September and would be turning twenty-one shortly after beginning his senior year...or maybe he'd graduated high school early. He was attending a prestigious school, after all. Martin swallowed down and staunchly ignored the odd gut-punch feeling that realization came with, and peeked across the table over top of the menu. "Just precautionary, nothing more." "I mean," Henry cocked a mischievous eyebrow, "you could always just say you're my dad. That makes it legal, right?" Recovering quickly from the momentary shock of hearing a statement like that come out of his date's mouth (and as if he hadn't had thoughts along the exact same lines himself just that afternoon) Martin coughed a little and shook his head. "No, no. I'm afraid Indiana is a little too...conservative for parental permission allowances." "Eugh," Henry scrunched his nose like a bunny, vague disgust playing out across his face as he dug his wallet out, "That's a bummer. It's a good thing I'm twenty-one, then, huh?"

It's the same as going "Do I still pass for 12?" about a goddamn kids menu. IT'S A BIT.

Then, the server assumes they're related because of the age gap. This is a play on married couples being mistaken for blood family.

"Is this going to be on one card, or are you splitting it with your...son?" "...One card will suffice." From across the table, he could feel Henry's eyes trained on his face as he tucked his credit card into the folder. Son. That's...hm. Well. Third time's the charm, I suppose. "Very good. I'll have this right back for you." As soon as the server was back out of range, Martin let himself look back over at Henry, who was still watching him with a sly smile. "Not gonna correct him?" "I wasn't the one who suggested that I play your father on the off chance you didn't bring your ID." Henry shrugged with his eyebrows, a quick up-down of acquiescence. "Touché. Thank you for paying."

And Martin returns the joke that Henry started. IT'S A BIT. IT'S AN INSIDE JOKE.

And when it happens a second time, but without the ability to joke about it, Henry is offended and has half a mind to correct the receptionist before deciding it's not worth the time. (Because he's wise enough to know he's never going to see this person again, so why bother?)

"Creel? Room twenty-two? That room doesn't have an outstanding balance on it." "...What?" "Yeah. A man came by and paid it. He said he knew you. Tall, about six-two, maybe six-three? Brown hair, middle aged? The last name on the card was, uh..." he tapped a few keys, and then squinted down at the computer, "Brenner." Henry's response was out before he could stop it. "You're shitting me." "Nope. I have better things to do than lie to teenagers. Take it up with yer Pop." He would have sputtered indignantly, but he thought better of it when he realized it was simpler to just nod and go on his way than try to explain to the receptionist that no, Martin wasn't his father, he was some well-off guy he'd met at a comic con who seemed to have taken a special liking to him after they'd slept together.

Also, has no one ever heard of calling someone a child to be nasty to them/to tell them that they're being annoying? That is what's happening, here.

The "son" thing was a BIT. It was a JOKE. and as soon as Henry can't joke about it, he's upset by the assumption. He's not happy people assume the two of them are father and son. Christ.

Also, parting notes:

I sure hope you didn't keep those poor people held up for over an hour. Sounds fake anyway, like one of those old tumblr posts with "and everyone in the grocery store cheered".

Also...have you ever heard of the term "hate-fucking"? It's kind of a pillar of fandom.

Okay, that's all I have to say. Cheers!

[mike-wheeler-faggotry]

i have caught up on The Drama. the fuck do you mean "these people would forgive rapists" bitch theres a very very big difference between real people and fictional people. liking henward and finding him/them fascinating does not exclude me from wanting henward to get the punishment he deserves. i just strongly disbelieve that being evil is an innate trait a literal child can have, and even though i cant argue that killing your family is kind of a bad move, if a literal child goes to such an extreme something has to be really really really wrong in that home. also i find a lot of fucked up characters neat i literally stan shen jiu

[mike-wheeler-faggotry]

The ST fandom as a large whole has always been rather toxic (at least in the years I've been here), but byler tumblr was a refuge from that bs... until the tag exploded after season 4.

I think some people have forgotten how to be nice, and I hate to say bc I loathe the term, but some of y'all are actually chronically online.

Sometimes, I look at the way baby writers/artists/other content creators are treated and am extremely thankful I was not a part of this fandom as a newbie. My hopes would've been crushed immediately.

Treat the people online as strangers because at the end of the day, unless otherwise specified, that's what they are. They don't owe you. You aren't paying them and they are doing this for fun. Let them have fun.

[wingsdippedingold]

One of my least favorite aspects about the ACOTAR fandom is the collective glossing over of details because they don’t fit your personal narrative. And that does go for all sides, but the specific issue that’s bothering me is Tamlin not teaching Feyre to read.

So many people said it’s a red flag and manipulative that he didn’t offer to teacher her to read, but rather to write the letter for her

BUT HE DID

HE DID OFFER TO TEACH HER

AND SHE REFUSED

SO HE DIDNT PUSH IT

Not everyone is Rhysand, and while you may or may not think it’s commendable that he essentially made her learn how to read, you cannot sit here and say he’s better for that when you don’t recall the thing you’re trying to argue

[lovelyrotter]

can we all remember to just say 'oh no thank you, i dont like that kind of food' but apply that logic and rules to shipping and letting other people ship again

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

Okay, but like

As someone who personally disliked the fandom characterization of Mangey as a child who is basically a wild animal

Which of course meant that (even though this standard was not applied to other equally feral boscage maze characters) if you even dared to have ships involving Mangey it was considered "beastiality"

Season 3 was so vindicating for me. Like as someone who always characterized him as selectively mute/largely nonverbal and with less palatable autism, it was so great to see the proof in the pudding that he is just as capable of being more than just the group dog thought like any other mobian and the hilarity of him being surprisingly adept with technology. Like god those few Sails/Mangey interactions were so so good

[alessandriana]

In preparation for my almost certainly needing a distraction to keep from going insane on Nov 5th, please chuck some prompts my way-- the more blatantly and indulgently idtastic, the better.

[henrysglock]

I still don’t understand why people think this:

is specifically about byIer 😭

ByIer a) are already heroes by being the ‘good guys’, and b) already have their belonging within their friend group. Will has already been a hero, and so has Mike. They are heroes, and they have a place where they belong. This quote is specifically about characters who don’t have anyone/don’t belong anywhere, but who also aren’t heroes, currently.

That…doesn’t describe byIer, or any of the other protagonists, because they’re a group of friends who are already heroes. They’re already good! They’re already loved! That quote describes someone who’s alone and not a hero becoming a hero via finding love/a place to belong.

That’s like, common sense. I fear.

[mike-wheeler-faggotry]

why does the "if you think will's possession is in any way rape adjacent you're a pedophile" stuff coming back GO AWAY GO AWAY

[mike-wheeler-faggotry]

....And this post is about a ship war? About shipping wank? That's what this dramatic-ass speech is about? Am I hallucinating?

this is the funniest thing I've read on reddit help

my only counterpoint: youtube

[theshadowrealmitself]

Making this a post so hopefully it stops rotating in my mind:

So y’all know those tropes in fics when people are shipping characters on opposite sides and so the evil one becomes redeemed when the good one that they’ve fallen in love with refuses to get with them or did get with them but runs off because they can’t be with someone who’s evil and that’s what gets them to start being good?

Anyways, so for some reason, my mind is stuck on a scenario like that, where the good one (A) really loves their spouse (B), but can’t be with them anymore, maybe it’s because B wasn’t evil when they first got together, maybe A’s just barely realizing how fucked up their side is and defected to the other side, maybe they knew B was evil when they first got together and thought getting with them would help fix them

Either way, A can’t do it anymore, and so they separate, after clearly communicating with their spouse that they can’t stand whatever fucked up action anymore, but the second B stops, they can come back to A and be welcomed with open arms

And a lot of it is that they can’t be someone like that anymore, and so if B never changes, then they’ll never get back together, and that’s okay with A as much as it can be, because A just can’t handle it anymore

But they really, really hope that the separation does something to B, that B actually does care enough about them and their relationship to stop being evil, because they really do love them, even if it makes them feel guilty for loving someone on the evil side, so they wait for any sign that B is stopping and coming back to them

And wait

And wait

And wait

Until one day, they get word that B stopped! Not only have they stopped doing whatever action, but they’re actively working to make everything they did right to anyone they’ve hurt, all because they didn’t want to lose their spouse, who’s unhappy with them being evil

But the spouse being referred to isn’t A, it’s a new spouse they got after the separation, they just didn’t care enough about A to try and not lose them

[thestarswhim]

Random Turbo headcanon, but I wonder if he based some of his looks off of Felix when making his King Candy appearance.

What would the most friendliest, non-suspecting, genuine person who could be trusted to fix allll your problems look like?

... OH--

[lilacpaperbird]

not being able to follow someone really funny who ships your favorite ship because they also ship your most hated ship

[mike-wheeler-faggotry]

technically i will say that being ace and homosexual is a thing, but like. nonnie. actually wait thats too endearing. clownon. this is a tv show. things are going to be simplified for the sake of storytelling. if they wanted a character to be ace, they wouldnt make him experience sexual attraction. it is that simple.

Why do you hate ace people so much??? Will is confirmed gay and in love with Mike, nothing else. Your HC is just that, a HC. It is as good as ours. You have a right to your interpretation of the character. You do not not have a right to aphobia. Asexuality and homosexuality can and do coexist all the time. It sounds like you just don’t understand asexuality, just like you don’t understand bisexuality. Not everyone is allo. Will can be ace and Mike can be bi and that’s beautiful and 100% valid within canon

Lmfao. Uh. No it’s not within canon. And I don’t hate ace people at all. It’s so fucking annoying that people keep taking “this character isnt ace and maybe you guys should re examine your biases because its always the same fucking characters getting headcanoned as ace no matter how much it contradicts canon” and turning it into “I HATE ACE PEOPLE!!!!!”

And it’s not headcanon, it’s analysis of what’s presented in the fucking show. I never said you dont have a right to your interpretation, I simply said that it’s factually inaccurate and often rooted in bias. You have every right to your inaccurate and biased interpretation. And i also have every right to call it inaccurate/non canon and biased. Cope. Seethe, even.

Aphobia this aphobia that when will you stop calling everything aphobia. The only thing im scared of is the rising illiteracy rates in the queer community as evidenced by this anon message.

Asexuality and homosexuality are mutually exclusive. Sorry. You can talk about asexuality and homoromanticism coexisting but the key point of homosexuality is sexual attraction 💀💀💀 It sounds like YOU dont understand homosexuality or asexuality.

Idk what show you’ve been watching but ace will and bi mike are very much not 100% within canon. I mean i guess it’s within canon if you watch the show on mute with your eyes closed.

Im not saying everyone is allo. Im saying will is written that way & that peoples’ ace headcanons of him are often (but not always) rooted in questionable biases about gay men and SA victims. And also there’s a difference between the sexuality of people IRL vs how sexualities are conveyed in a show. Hence why bi mike doesnt stand up, because there’s writing and production choices that contradict it every 5 minutes.

Anyway. Hope that sending this briefly gave that boost to your victim complex that you so obviously needed <333

[dollypopup]

listen

Colin canonically adores Pen. like. . .very obviously. He is one of very few characters who repeatedly compliments her, seeks out her company, checks in on how she is feeling, cares about her opinion. he listens to her in a way i can honestly say no other character does (and yes, I am counting Eloise in this). and Penelope canonically adores Colin. she ALSO listens to him, she also always wants to talk to him and cares about his thoughts and dreams like he does hers

so. . .someone please make it make sense why the polin fandom so badly wants Colin to grovel for her forgiveness when he has spent 2 entire seasons caring about Pen on main w/ full blown heart eyes and Penelope has spent 2 entire seasons seeing the very best in him and lighting up from within every time they're around each other?

what kind of vindictive, mean fanon nonsense Penelope have we created that would see a person who she cares for and who cares for her in turn begging her for ANYTHING and want that? especially when she is currently very much lying to him and will also have to, at one point or another, apologize?

polin is a mirror. that is their motif. that is the point of their romance, to see each other and to be seen, to reflect one another. i don't want to see Colin begging and I don't want to see Penelope begging but I, personally, am begging that we finally let this trope die

[superbellsubways]

putting my tweets here too bc i can