#fandom is really a different world sometimes
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Now don't throw tomatoes at me but I'm actually really excited to finally see malleus again— I've always loved malleus since we met him in the story, but I'm also sooo curious about what's gonna happen next,, I'm wondering the obvious thing, about whether or not we might get a parralel scenario like what happened with the KoD and silver will have to "slay" malleus or at least be the one to land a killing blow, but I also saw a really interesting post focusing on how magic is a manifestation of dreams and deep desires and imagination,,,, in that case, I may (VERY delusionally) hope that Yuu finally gets to be a major part of the story for once??? Even reading the novels, there HAS to be something bigger for yuu— while the idea of crowley simply being an incompetent airhead is fun and more comfortable, haven't you thought that meybe he pulled them into this world deliberately??
All to say, what if at some point, Yuu somehow manifests magic in a very dire moment ?? You know lol?? Agh idk. I just want yuu to finally make impactful choices but that IS too much to ask, as far as we can see for now,,, (but hey, that part leading up to ace getting is UM, and the convo between him and yuu,,, it *does* give one a sliver of hope, doesn't it? :') )
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Don't worry, no tomato throwing here! 😅 I may not care for certain characters, but I’m not going to shame anyone that does. You’re free to think however you want about Malleus!
dbjsvsJcwhj My personal feelings about him aside, I am actually glad he’s finally relevant to the main story again. He’s missed out on so much of his own book OTL In the time he’s been gone, the fandom has been left to speculate about both his and Lilia’s potential death flags. I really doubt Twst will have the balls to kill off one of them, but it would be cool to at least see Silver delivering the final blow to knock some sense into (not necessarily kill) OB Malleus.
Yes, it’s true that Silver states in the recent update that magic was originally considered “a miracle borne of strong desires from the heart.” But 💦 I don’t think that means Yuu would randomly manifest magic in the final fight?? It feels more like a “let’s save the day with the power of friendship” to me, but I could of course be wrong.
I understand being frustrated that Yuu’s participation in the main story seems to fluctuate a lot, with most of their activity being books 3, 4, and segments of 1, 6, and 7. That’s not much, especially considering how long books 6 and 7 are. Sometimes (even in events) it feels like Yuu is barely there, as most dialogue options don’t involve different reactions from the characters. Even Yuu's quest to find a way home is barely addressed or taken seriously until early in book 7. Yuu hasn't gotten "real" development unless you count them realizing their Disney dreams are prophetic in book 5, taking the initiative to save Grim in book 6, and that dialogue option about them being worried they're not contributing + the related convo with Ace in book 7. All very short moments in the grand scheme of things. And honestly, I think that makes sense for the kind of character Yuu is. A blank slate, a self-insert, an outsider that's easy to exposit information to, someone with which to view the story, characters, and world through. Yuu is primarily there to be the POV character, the lenses, the camera that we see Twst through. They're not really meant to be a traditional "main character". It's possible that Twst gives them a slightly bigger role at the very end (especially with what went down in the dream in book 7), but I doubt it will be a huge triumphant moment where they and they alone save the day or deal the final blow in a crazy act of self-sacrifice. Twst has always been a story that puts the NRC boys first, while Yuu is the observer.
I've noticed that the complaint of Yuu not doing a lot in the story comes mainly from English speaking fans?? And I guess that makes sense, given how western culture tends to emphasize independence and standing out. They want Yuu to reflect that. They want to be the ones to make a difference. I don't even remember ever seeing these same comments from the Japanese speaking fans; it's definitely a less common sentiment for them. The Japanese fans seem pretty content with Yuu being an observer and taking on more of a minor or supporting role. Again, this fits in with what I understand of many eastern cultures. They're demurer, not wanting to stand out too much from the crowd and instead prioritizing group harmony. Very interesting cultural difference to note!
It's a common theory (with many variants) that Crowley intentionally summoned Yuu to Twisted Wonderland for his own nefarious motives. People found him pretty sus right away due to how he seems to not put in any real time or effort into investigating a way to send Yuu home. Plus, there's that ominous opening monologue of his to consider. However, I don't think he summoned Yuu because of their (potential) great magical capabilities. The Mirror of Darkness tells us that it doesn't sense a shred of magic in Yuu, and Leona smells zero magic on them (though that could be because it hasn't technically manifested yet, as some fans claim).
The idea is that Yuu is supposed to be plain. They are supposed to be magicless. Why? To humble the NRC students and to show them that asserting yourself violently or with great magical power ISN'T the way to go. To show them value in strategizing (which Yuu does in the prologue by helping Grim aim at the ghosts), of camaraderie. What does it say about the story's themes if Yuu, the person who is supposed to be showing them the worth of mundane things, is suddenly... "secretly ultra-strong, actually/“just like you guys” (even if it's only a temporary hope-fueled magic)? It might contradict what has already been set up. It also breaks the self-insert appeal of Yuu, since developing magic would also mean Yuu would later have to further develop things like proficiency in magic, best/worst subjects, and an unique magic/signature spell... meaning Yuu HAS to become better "defined", thus losing their blank slate nature. This would surely upset some fans who deeply project onto Yuu, have a Yuusona, etc.
Yuu can still make an impact on the characters and the world--and they have, judging by how much closer the boys are with each other--without having to be The Most Special One or like everyone else. I think it undermines what Yuu has already managed to achieve to say that they haven't made an impactful choice at ANY point in the main story when I believe they definitely have. Yuu made the choice to sign the contract with Azul. Yuu made the choice to approach Malleus. Yuu made the choice to go against Crowley's orders and go retrieve Grim from S.T.Y.X. Yuu made the choice to get Leona’s help with the contracts. Yuu made the choice to stand with Adeuce against Riddle in book 1. Yuu made the choice to let the VDC/SDC tribe train at Ramshackle. Yuu has done a lot, and all without needing to seize the spotlight or to do anything big and flashy. I don't think Yuu needs to be big and flashy. There is pride to be had in simplicity and being humble too. There is pride in representing the 90% of humans in Twisted Wonderland that are ordinary and without magic.
(An aside: so if Yuu wasn’t able to manifest magic in many other extreme instances, does that mean their desire to save Grim in book 6 wasn’t “enough”? That their desire to save Ramshackle, their one and only home in this world, wasn’t “enough”? It implies that Yuu didn’t wish hard enough for these other things they clearly care about and want.)
I think a good way to give Yuu a decent role while staying true to their design as a blank slate would be for Twst to really lean into the whole "beast tamer" aspect that was introduced all the way back in the prologue. This would work well with their deep connection to Grim as well. Assuming that Grim ends up being the final OB... We could easily have the NRC students and staff on the ropes, Malleus at his wit's end after exhausting himself with his own OB, a rampaging Grim about to end it all. And then... one lone figure shakily rises from the rubble and confronts Grim. One human. Magicless, defenseless. A human lost in an unfamiliar world, a human who believes they're useless and don't contribute much. A human who is always in need of being protected by others. But not anymore. This time, it's Yuu's turn to protect what they love--their friends, this world they've come to love, Grim. Ace and Deuce yelling at Yuu to not be stupid, to get back--but Yuu just advances, calling out to Grim and begging him to stop. And maybe it's Yuu's wish that rallies everyone and/or gets OB Grim to hesitate. That's when they can strike. Is that corny? Yeah. Does it sound like the ending to a Disney film? Sure. But it still grants Yuu, a magicless human that is supposed to be there to teach everyone about friendship, cooperation, and humility, their big moment to shine. The best of both worlds, I'd say.
#disney twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#twst en#twisted wonderland en#twst jp#twisted wonderland jp#Yuu#Grim#Dire Crowley#Malleus Draconia#Ace Trappola#Deuce Spade#Silver#Lilia Vanrouge#Azul Ashengrotto#Leona Kingscholar#book 5 spoilers#book 7 spoilers#notes from the writing raven#book 6 spoilers#prologue spoilers#Riddle Rosehearts#book 1 spoilers
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jumping off of that other ask: how do you think religion in Exandria should have been implemented?
honestly? I think this is the wrong question to ask. I think it is, ultimately, fine if religion in Exandria is only organized within the confines of Vasselheim and is otherwise a highly individualized affair; indeed, it even makes sense in a world where the gods can directly interact with their followers (even across the Divine Gate). In fact, the lack of organized religion now is a fascinating setup for it likely coming into existence in some form in the absence of that direct communication - like, every prime deity/betrayer god religion in Exandria is about to enter a cycle of once-per-lifespan messianic events. Some kind of organized practice will probably spring up around this!
My problem is that the PCs, to an extent, acted as though there were full religions in the world and that they were systems of oppression when that was never the case. So actually the implementation should have been taking Laura, Marisha, and Taliesin aside and being like "so your character's position is totally fine and valid! It is, objectively, exceptionally self-centered, in that you are basically just mad that you didn't get the benefits of a L20 cleric after calling up a god once or twice. Do you want to play them this way, or do you want to approach this differently?" And, of course, a lot of fans projected their own experience of religion as a vehicle for oppression - and to be clear, religion in our world frequently can be that- onto a world where that isn't the case. That's less preventable; you should never try to please the fans, let alone the dumbest fans.
On some level, however, a lot of the lore of C3 in the end failed to hold up to the plot of C3 and it wasn't even religion that was the problem. Like, Ruidus as a mystery and dark threat to the world was established before campaign 3, but the concept of Ruidusborn was rather weakly set up. The level of knowledge people had surrounding the Calamity and the gods varied wildly from "pretty decent" in C1-C2 to "what's an Asmodeus" in C3. Tharizdun was very much teased as a concept in C2 and now occupies a rather incoherent space of "it's on the same level as the primes and betrayers and was included among the betrayer gods whereas lesser deities are not; but it's also not The Divine Of Tengar and seen as food for Predathos (but the Raven Queen and presumably Vecna are); and also it's still shackled and THOSE shackles will apparently hold the OTHER devouring void without any problem even while the other gods are mortal and unaware of themselves and that's not an existential threat to be dealt with, it's fine to leave THAT bound," which thematically clashes with the entire story.
As a doorstopper fantasy fan/very casual comics fan/person who came to Dragon Age the Veilguard without much knowledge of the world to a fandom mad at a number of changes/person who has has a lot of critique of C3, this post says it more eloquently: in an ongoing work, sometimes you write yourself into corners and have to decide what to do about it. This is made even more complicated by actual play's unpredictable nature*. I think that Matt had a vision that the previous worldbuilding could have supported if the characters in C3 wanted to save the gods from the jump, but once they strayed from that the lore began to buckle under its own weight and here we are. So really it comes back to my point before: religion doesn't need to be implemented in Exandria and if it had been it should have been done in like, mid-C1, and as for how, that depends on the story Matt wanted to tell, but maybe he should have tried to tell a different one with Campaign 3 that was better supported by the lore we did have.
*to be clear I've already addressed why the "it's improv" defense fails to hold for Campaign 3 given that it failed to properly build on previous choices, but also, and I cannot stress this enough, the DM still makes the calls, and allowing a die roll (or not allowing a die roll), setting a poor DC, failing to establish something prior to a character asking about it, poor planning, and more are all poor choices that make for a weaker story. Actual play can in fact simply be bad, and nothing makes me immediately think you're stupid than trying to argue the mere possibility of criticism itself is invalid. Address the argument, accept that people will disagree with you, or leave; those are your options.
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I agree with the "Ram person" assessment. 😆 You've caused me to do a lot more Thinking about Ram and the rest of the world of the ENCOM system than I ever have before. (My relationship with any fandom as an INFP has always been imbibe the thing, bask in the glorious feels, and sometimes look at other people's analyses and see if they resonate).
In my actual Thinking for developing my own headcanon about circuitry, I've thought the same thing...that the unitards the actors wore translates to programs' "skin" and not clothing...and that the pauldrons, gauntlets, and boots can be removed. (I know this is different in Legacy because Rinzler pulls down Quorra's clothing to expose a tattoo on her skin, but in my head, in '82 they have no skin under what we see).
I also think that programs' appearance is similar to a video game avatar and that they can be changed but only if they have a terminal like Yori has. In my mind those terminals (at least in what we see in '82) are very difficult to come by and means most programs during the MCP's reign aren't able to change their appearance.
Now...I did NOT know that the novelization talked about Yori being "completely herself again" when she changed into what we see in her apartment. (I really need to read the novelization 🤨). That gives me even more to Think about in terms of Ram's circuitry outside of his "warrior form."
Onto the less headcanon-y, more practical part of my contribution.
A photo was recently posted to a Discord server that shows the circuitry of what I assume all User-loyal programs who wear the chest armor Ram wears looks like:
Here are reference photos of Ram and Crom showing parts of this circuitry peeking out:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c2096ca8c5e18a0304ff9e4ba9367a75/f5a8748764697ce8-c9/s400x600/16190405b1b4a357df957e9dbe38e60ceb9464ce.jpg)
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Again, from a practical standpoint, it makes sense that the costuming department would repeat these patterns to save time and energy.
Here is a red warrior shot showing the bottom rib portion of the same circuitry...with much simpler circuitry on the legs:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ed4b08807556664cf51303143fa368d3/f5a8748764697ce8-93/s640x960/011e5f6077ff181e5a7e9e04ec7389d7dc57a695.jpg)
So basically, to me, this is the circuitry of all chest-armored warrior programs who don't have access to a terminal. I'm still pondering what exactly is underneath this skin or "shell" though, as I said, I don't think there's another layer like User-like skin.
Side note: Why does it look like they doodled a sad MCP sketch on the ribcage part? 😂
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I noticed that you're essentially the resident RAM person on Tumblr and, first of all, you're fascinating and I love you (in a non romantic way) and second, do you know, or have ideas, about what RAM's circuitry looks like under the armor?
Oooh!!!!!!
First of all I appreciate the compliments very much -- it feels weird to be considered a Ram expert since I've only been in Tron fandom a little over a year, and I really don't want to take away from the voices of fans who have been here for ages... but, I do admit I have spent that short time in an abnormally intense state of hyperfixation, and I LOVE talking about my headcanons, especially about Ram...
so... here we go!!
Okay, so, in my funhouse of a brain this thing about Ram's circuitry is probably a more complicated question than it'd seem to anyone else. Several different interpretations and answers here.
On the one hand, there's my understanding that clothing in the Encom system doesn't actually come off, just gets shifted from one outfit to another-- with the same sort of animated effect you might get when changing the outfit of a video game avatar.
Generally, asking what's under a program's suit is a kind of meaningless question.
I think even if they have a "naked" option for how they can appear, it's not "underneath" the others in any meaningful sense, it's just another outfit. Nor is it their "true" appearance in any way -- one program could have several different naked renders with different anatomy!
But:
your question was about armor, and I do imagine that some of the armor pieces worn by warriors in the Games can be taken off. Although we don't see proof of it onscreen, my own feelings tell me that the helmets and gauntlets and shoulder pads can probably be "removed" pretty much like clothing. On the code level of things, I imagine the code for those is more similar to "object being carried" than "outfit being worn."
Interesting little side detail here! Apart from the very dramatic change of outfit that Yori does in the Deleted Love Scene, there are a couple instances of small costume changes being made between scenes-- with known behind-the-scenes reasons for it.
Like how Yori wears a warrior helmet while on the Solar Sailer, because Cindy Morgan insisted on taking a break from that tight headcap and the painful glue that held it onto her head.
But then, it's fairly straightforward to theorize in-universe reasons why a helmet may be more proper solar-sailing attire than a headcap.
It's harder to explain an in-universe reason for the sudden change in appearance in both Ram's disc and his hands, between two frames of the disc-trick scene:
The out-of-universe explanation is that the disc tricks were done by a double, instead of by Dan Shor. Which could explain the shift from bare hands to gloves-- it's probably hard to do those tricks with gloves on (though it doesn't quite explain why Ram has to wear gloves the whole rest of the scene, or why a whole different disc was needed.)
In-universe, anyway, I like to imagine that Ram was calibrating or testing his disc in some way-- and this involved running a subroutine that temporarily changed the appearance of both the disc and his hands, simply as a graphic interface to show that the routine is running.
....Okay, that was a long side detail! Back onto the question of Ram's armor.
I've also posted before about how I view the armor of game warriors. Basically, I see it as functioning less like actual armor, and more like a set of symbols to represent which programs do what. (Like how the toga indicates novices, and so on.)
Anyway, whatever Ram's vest means, I think that it does come off, and would reveal a different set of circuitry on the "bodysuit" portion of his render underneath that.
But, to be honest, I think that pattern would be pretty standardly similar to the one on Flynn and on a few of the other conscripts. The parts of it that we can see-- that little arrowlike thing below his neck, for instance-- are pretty much the same. So I'd guess it's all part of a design that's just one of a few standard render patterns that get used and reused for warriors.
However.
Ram could still have a secret, unique, cool and interesting appearance of his own! The whole outfit of Ram in the games is a render chosen by the MCP, and is not necessarily what Ram considers "himself."
I think programs can have specific appearances that they consider to be their "true form"-- the way they appear when they get to be fully themselves. This is what Yori seemed to be shifting into for the Love Scene.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/214329ba299ffe131f0496362393078a/ae501b90b2dac768-65/s400x600/0864c44d7c8fed337622eb5b6f9e61f0df13e604.jpg)
It's even more clear in the novelization's version of that scene, which also gave Tron a transformation of his own, in which his circuitry "took on a flowing look."
I imagine it's possible that many programs have a "true form" with patterns that look less angular and more organic. The parts of the System that are "free" and the way things naturally "should" be (...the I/O Tower.... Yori's creative decorations in her quarters...) do tend to have more flowing, curvaceous lines.
....And now I do feel a bit inspired to draw something like that for Ram.
I think he'd love it.
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When I first started in fandom, for whatever reason I decided making fankids was like… too cringe for me. Like that was the arbitrary line I drew of what was too deep into fandom for me.
Anyway, think of this when I post my fankid drawings later because they represent me surrendering what is left of my dignity and fully surrendering to the cringe.
#honestly a lot of this was just that my early fandom experience was being surrounded by people who were ONLY into their fankids#to the point where they barely cared about the canon characters or killed them off entirely#and I felt like then what even is the point of being here if you're like that?#and no judgement if you're OC obsessed it's just like I have a whole back catalog of original characters so I personally didn't Get It#but then I needed to create some for narrative necessity and i was like eh this might as well happen#but you'll notice even my fankid stuff is still fully from the pov of the canon characters bc they are the ones I care about most#but I understand the OC / fankid thing better now in that it's training wheels for a lot of people#and it's great a great way to test drive until you're ready to create a character from scratch#or for people who have no interest in making content to contribute to the fandom space by commissioning art of their little guys#or to play in the fandom space without the confines of canon by making it their own#so be cringe and free everyone and have fun#though I will forever think about the time someone joined one of the non-fandom writing servers#and asked why we didn't have a channel to talk about OCs#and we had to gently explain that we were all writing original fiction all of every single one of our characters were 'OCs'#fandom is really a different world sometimes
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KILL!!!!!!!!!
#my post#this is so mean. why did i make this#but also....... the gun is in your hands now#i'll admit that it's my fault for putting the gun in your hand... however i've no say in what you choose to do with it#will you pull the trigger and accept whatever happens from now on? will you give yourself into the role forced upon you?#no one will know anything if you don't say anything. there will be no consequences or repercussions to this choice#but you will know. and you will need to live with that knowledge for the rest of your life#a gun not fired is like an itch not stratched#in the end i have no control over what you do... but free will is a funny thing#the brain is very susceptible to suggestion... everything we see and experience will remain with us in some way#if that's the case then how much control do we really have in our lives? how do we separate what we really want vs what we're told to want?#things like hunger... desire... they're all things the body asks for. but are they things that we truly want?#or are they merely a mechanism built into us for the sake of survival?#everything blends into everything. your past actions will inform your current actions. you're the only one who's ever lived your life#you're the only one who will ever live your life#little variables and experiences we all share... but the order varies greatly from person to person. everything is just a series of events#the way i see the world is different than the way you see it regardless of how similar they are#what choice will you make now? and how does it differ from the choice you would've made a week ago? a month? a year? does it differ at all?#does free will truly exist? i think it does... but not in the way most people think it exists#you and i... we might differ on that thought. or we might not.#regardless of whatever i've been rambling about right now... refusing to make a choice is still a choice you make. life is ironic like that#does one of them really have to go? that's for you to decide now#i've merely chosen to put the gun in your hand. to make you aware of the possibilities#so i hope you realize what power your choices have#dca fandom#daycare attendant#yeah sometimes i just say things that i think are deep but they're really not#i hope the choices i make have an effect on others. even if it's just one person...#if i can make even just one person think about something they wouldn't have normally thought about then isn't that a win?#life is a series of choices... ''it'd be great if you could see a figure of light by the time you die'' ♡
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you know i had a fun little vp idea i wanted to do for the cyberpunk anniversary but i haven't had the energy to even touch it recently so i'll just settle with saying that this game impacted me in ways i never thought it would when i first picked it up 3 years ago. i knew i would enjoy it, i had been looking forward to it for a long time, and despite a ~controversial~ launch, i had a fucking blast from day 1 (on ps4 no less). regardless of bugs and memes and public dunking, the story grabbed me like nothing else could at the time, and it reignited so much of my passion and motivation for art that i had lost in the clutches of mental illness and i'll always be grateful for that. it introduced me to so many wonderful people (some whom i carry very close to my heart), and maybe most personally surprising, it gave me an outlet to understand parts of myself that i had been too afraid to acknowledge for a long time, the courage to accept and embrace myself as non-binary, and allow myself to just BE without trying to convince myself i'm crazy. that's not what i expected from the get-go but it's been a really fun journey to be on ngl
#yeah this fandom been a little rocky in places but i would be lying if i said this community here wasn't special to me#so much love and passion and creativity to be around and be inspired by#so many people who have been impacted by this silly little heartwrenching game#devs who have poured their heart into it to deliver something genuinely incredible#its one of those strange things that really did fully change the trajectory of this little leg of my life#to think that until 3 years ago i hadn't even touched art in a decade#now there are lovely people who want to spend money on my work#3 years ago i bought my first (and only) refurbished ps4 to play this game and now im sitting on a fancy gaming laptop#ive said it before but vp has been such an important creative outlet too#its allowed me to live my dreams of being a film director. a cinematographer. a writer.#the whole game has let me be so damn self-indulgent sometimes i feel like a kid again just unashamedly playing barbie#finding the JOY of just. creating.#i learned so much about myself through an OC because of this game#it went from 'huh what is this feeling? gender envy?' to being like full blown 'oh yea. i get it now.' so much of my life makes sense kfslf#and i met people who mean the world to me on top of it all#woof anyways#i know i say it a lot but genuinely thank u to yall who have encouraged me and supported me and who enjoy the things that i make#youve made such a difference in my life without knowing it!
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one thing I love about following celebrities/artists who are honest and proactive about their mental health struggles etc is I can’t count the number of times someone I know is going through something and I’m like ‘I’ve got a song for u’ and how much of my life involves telling myself ‘if [redacted] can do something/get better/etc then so can i’ (and having actual real evidence of it in front of me) and I can’t understate how much I appreciate these things.
but at the same time it involves a whole lot of watching people I care about suffer and you learn to read the signs and infer between the lines in songs and interviews, and yes we can never fully know what they don’t share with us, but when they do share things it’s not a big stretch to be like ‘this seems like it’s what life is like for you and I have taken encouragement from it but you deserve so much better’. and it’s easy to find ways to get angry at a predatory industry and realise things that could be hurtful if you’re already fragile.
and we can advocate for some things and help ourselves and the people around us feel better but it’s hard to meaningfully reach your faves as an individual. and there are things we can’t say on the internet in too much detail, speculation becomes the harmful kind of gossip, and so sometimes it’s a whole lot of internally saying ‘you’re doing incredibly well to have gotten to where you are but I wish for your sake things would get better faster’
#curse and catch 22 (not the song)#I didn’t mean to make this so anonymous as a post but maybe. it’s applicable to a lot of artists. I don’t know#just thinking about how sometimes someone will say something and it’s like ‘oh honey’ if you can see. why they might be saying it#like a glimpse into the top of an iceberg that makes a lot of sense to be there given other things they do and talk about#I feel like we’re in a unique position as a fandom with the way all four of them have been so vulnerable in different ways#and they may not be perfect but imo no one deserves to suffer like that especially for an extended amount of time. but the thing is#sometimes the fans are suffering and so are our faves and people appreciate the relatability and don’t have any basic compassion#or ability to see past their own struggles. with this fandom especially compared to a lot of others I’ve been in and I think I know why#but in the end the way I see it we’ve gotten so much relatable content and encouragement (bc the Finding The Positives Vibes which are ther#and sometimes there’s nothing we can give back apart from being a part of systemic change which all of us deserve for ourselves too#idk if this band is unique in this or I just find them more relatable personally and thus easier to see how hard they’ve worked#on themselves and taking risks in order to be honest. and it reminds me of the quote about how suffering won’t make your art better#healing will. and so imo anyone whose art is really good when they are going through a lot has me thinking. imagine what it’d be like#when life isn’t so hard for you?? or when you’re getting better but it just takes a long time I’m like. you deserve to feel better faster#this all said I’m incredibly proud and I’m not trying to insinuate there’s anything catastrophic going on bc there absolutely isnt#I am not in any way worried. I’ve seen tragedies about to happen and these guys show none of the signs. but I do relate to a lot of tidbits#pertaining to. certain chronic mental illnesses and/or being neurodivergent in an unaccommodating world (don’t ask which)#things I would anticipate would be a lot harder when there’s hordes of often fickle occasionally predatory fans to contend with#sometimes I just think of this idk#celebrities are people#5 seconds of summer#5sos#5sos fandom#cw mental health things
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I know you said you are a Donnie enjoyer yeah he’s awesome I love him. I love all the guys actually it’s just the sunset duo are my favs. What’s your opinion on the sunset duo I mean Raph and Mikey as individuals or as a duo
I AM VERY MUCH A SUNSET DUO ENJOYER THEYRE GREAT!!!!! i have a sep!au fully plotted out that centers them as one of the Big Dynamics (ive been waiting for an excuse to ramble about it so maybe later. wears button that says Please Ask Me About My Work),,, i dont have a ton to say but i feel bad for people who favor them because this is a very disaster twins centered fanbase from what i've observed LMAO. raph and mikey enjoyers you deserve more food i am so sorry......
(more in the tags because that accidentally happened and im not transferring it over to here LMAO)
#ask#i should really write some raph centric angst because i think the world needs more of it#its been up there on my list with the old man yaoi (because seriously why is there so little of it must i do EVERYTHING around here)#raph and splinter's dynamic is so unexplored in canon and i kind of just want to TEAR INTO IT..... grrr#i have less to say about mikey except for the fact that some fandom characterization of him frustrates me#mikey's a confident little bastard and sometimes he can be a selfish little shit and like#ngl? i love him for that i think it makes him funny as hell#i think a lot of his role as the family therapist is something he does in an attempt to affirm HIMSELF#it explains the way he treats draxum very well. he's trying to prove he's capable to himself#because mikey is like leo in that way he just shows it differently#he's frustrated because he wants other people to respect him as much as he respects himself#so he brute forces it like dat#okay so apparently i had more to say about mikey than i did raph LMAO he's great#mikey's very susceptible to peer pressure and hates actually upsetting people but he's not conflict averse!!!#i see people make him handle raph and leo fighting worse than donnie does and im like Youre Wrong......#boy's actually very confrontational and upfront just like raph is#leo's reckless desperation to prove himself and raph's brute force approach to problems..... oh mikey thats a horrible combination ilysm
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ANYWHO goodnight tumblr i'll be back on the art grind tomorrow i think 🙏
#haunted ecosystem#i'll take a burst of creativity in a different form than usual than the burnout slump i've been in for a few months#<- part of why my fandom stuff has taken a smidge of a backseat#dont get me wrong i am still very excited about my fandoms im just having fun off in oc hell (affectionate)#its nice to just be able to create and not really worry about perception. and also i feel Less bad about just throwing ocs into the wringer#((blame the fact i've been REALLY interested in whump recently and i have been. fixated. on one of my characters.))#and ALSO i've been! rekindling my flame for wtds. i've been putting off thinking about it since that fic got.#nothing bad happened? but it was still very devastating that somebody who i considered a friend from that fic just. evaporated.#but i'm gonna finish that fic for him :) even if it takes a year. even if it's the one thing i finish ever. it'll be wtds.#for where its gotten me and the fact its what got me out of my shell and is the reason i trust that my writing is good!#i used to really hate rereading my work. i catch flaws that are obvious to me. but that fic. i just think about how *good* the story is#that story means. a lot to me? as a person? like the main character is not a good person. but people care about him anyway.#and there are so many little things. so many sentiments. so much that is a love letter to people who've done bad but learnt to do better#because. god knows i wasnt a good person even just a few years ago. and maybe i see myself in him a bit.#he came from a place of paranoia and fear and pain. and maybe its a good thing that i've found it difficult to write him recently.#because god. i've been HAPPY. even with the rough moments and bad days. i've been happy. i mean fuck.#my birthday's what. ten days away? god damn man. i'm going to be 18. that's an achievement.#i want to look the kid who thought it was over at half my age and tell him we fucking made it. and there are more years to come.#there's a life ahead. even if it's going to be a bitch. even if it's going to be tough. there's love in your heart and people who care and#you're going to fucking live and you're going to feel better one day. you have people to meet properly and thank and cherish.#because for every day it feel like the world's ending there are a dozen more where the sun shines just the right way through the rain#and you can't help but smile because it's just so god damn beautiful.#and fuck it. you're sick. your hands hurt and your legs don't work right. and it's tough sometimes. but you have people who understand.#you have people who honest to god love you for who you are and appreciate your company. and 18 is the first step.#you've spent half your life unlearning things and you've spent half your life relearning how to be what YOU want to be#and if you're a mediocre artist and passionate writer then you'll be fucking great at that. taking the time to learn when it strikes you.#and maybe this is for me. but its also for anybody reading it too. please god if there's one thing you take from this let it be that#somebody out there cares. *I* care. god i care. even if we've never spoken proper i care about you.#i practically have a list of everybody i see in my inbox. i love seeing familiar names show up. i.#i dont know how to neatly wrap up this tag ramble. but. i am so damn full of love it hurts sometimes. its scary to be happy but thats ok!
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Discussions of implied fictional CSA & SA
I recently been wondering if there’s a chance Richard thinks Roy’s aggressive and distant behavior is normal and not a sign of CSA because he acted similarly to Roy when he was younger
Reasonings in the tags
#Again TW for discussion/mentions of CSA/SA#I believe Richard was repeatedly SA by his brother throughout his childhood and early teenage years#He never realized it was SA because no one told him and pre-existing misinformation and harmful beliefs about SA#He unknowingly developed bad behaviors and coping mechanism from his CSA in his teenage years but nothing was really done#The school thought he was a rowdy troublemaker. His parents didn’t do jack to help him even after discovering the abuse because they-#worried more their reputations. And his friends didn’t know about the abuse either so they thought he was a rowdy kid and sometimes#Feed into his bad behaviors because they were dumb teenagers looking to have fun in the stupidest ways possible and not thinking of the-#consequences or why a kid like Richard was so mean and aggressive in the first place#I know this is a very sensitive topic and the fandom has all right to be hesitant about seeing how Roy’s truama was treated and#certain individuals approaching it terribly#However I don’t think the majority of the fandom understands how Roy’s SA is an integral part of his character. not only because it’s an-#canon explantation for his behavior but also being SA impacts EVERYTHING. how you look at the world. behaviors. relationships. etc#imo it’s feels weird to ignore it even if the original source treated it questionable#I am interested and do want to explore Roy’s story and the probable story of Richard too#Not only is it an integral part of Roy’s character that should be acknowledge more but also there’s an interesting story to tell about-#CSA/SA. how it affects everybody. and the different interpretations that can be written from it#I’m really interested in seeing a fanfic where Roy and Richard addressed their truama together. learn to heal. and become closer by the end#That being said I want to make it clear that when discussing these topics I still want to be respectful#If I ever handle it wrong or go to far. let me know. and if you have criticism for me regarding this. let me know too!#Again this is a very sensitive topic and I don’t want to contribute to the harm#spooky month#spooky month roy#spooky month richard#tw csa mention#tw csa#tw sa mention#tw sa implied#tw csa implied#tw sa#ChuchaYucca.text
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The thing about Ace/Sabo is that the ship is less about them being brothers but more like them sharing a childhood friendship? That had the potential of becoming something more in the future. Except it didn’t, for obvious reasons. And yeah not everyone’s a fan of that, but people also like the raised by wolves/son of a noble dynamic they had as children. While I agree Sabo does kind of feel like he was stuck to Ace&Luffy as an afterthought, with a piece of chewed-out gum — his existence doesn’t… I don’t know, feel out of place? I also enjoy how kinda tragic his character is, and how he carries that tragedy with him? In the form of Ace’s devil fruit (Sabo also canonically hallucinates and there was an instance where he admitted to hearing Ace’s voice, during his fight with Burgess? so yeah, not everyone’s cup of tea again but I’m a huge fan of hurt/comfort so having a character go through a psychotic depressive episode because of the insane guilt he feels? Just, yeah. Plus there’s something really poetic about him literally eating Ace’s DF and still considering it „Ace’s powers” etc) and the way I see Sabo/Lu is through Ace/Lu (and partially Ace/Sabo) anyway. Because Sabo is trying to fill out the role of an older brother/friend for Luffy that he’s well aware is impossible to fill — because nothing ever will be the same for Luffy. Nothing or no one could even come close to making it up for Ace’s loss to Luffy, and Sabo knows he’s kind of a cheap copy of that (figuratively and literally lmfao, as I know people have been calling him low-budget Ace), but still he tries to? And the fact that Luffy is technically his only remaining family (or at least someone he willingly considers family). And I kind of see it as a parallel to how Ace’s approach to Luffy changed after Sabo’s „death”? Because Sabo was the „kinder” brother, the nicer one, the smarter one, it was usually him who took Luffy’s side whenever Ace was annoyed with him? And the one who explicitly asked Ace to look after Luffy — which then was one of the direct reasons why Ace changed the way he treated Luffy, forced him to be more patient/learn to love and eventually led to Ace willingly becoming the „older brother” figure for Luffy. I’m in no way trying to convince you to like Sabo, don’t get me wrong!! I’m just trying to show an example how Ace/Sabo isn’t necessarily brotherly either (like, I don’t know, Sabo/Luffy seems to be?). And it’s just that while I’m first and foremost a huge Ace/Lu enjoyer I also think Sabo did have a significant impact on their relationship both before and after Ace’s death.
((!! sorry i took a while to reply! i made that post before work on Friday and then got slammed until just now fdghjgk)
the odd thing is, I mostly agree!! I think I had to vent bc i saw ppl (a few specific sabo fans haha) on twitter acting like luffy would feel nothing toward ace but be obsessed with sabo. and, lol, no. but what YOU said makes total sense. like, yes, Ace + Sabo definitely has a different, more involved feeling to me than Ace & Luffy. I've had some ships in the past that fit the raised by wolves/runaway noble trope... the charm of the noble feeling like "this is the only person I feel like I can really be myself around" and the wild one thinking "i like spending time with this noble—they're tougher/kinder/funnier than i gave them credit for" AND/OR "society has always rejected me, but this 'cultured' person accepting me heals that pain a little bit"—all of those things are really charming.
Maybe if we'd seen more about how ace and sabo became friends, or if there were more emphasis on sabo's acceptance being what helped ace's anger (instead of, just from how i saw things, it being mostly luffy's unconditional warmth toward ace that did it?) then I'd personally be more feral about that dynamic, haha. But it's like you said, I guess it all depends on what we each connect with. I dont find tragedy alone compelling... I'm depressed enough already as it is LMAO!! if I think too hard about how viscerally sad Sabo only remembering Ace after he'd died is, my brain just shuts down. But I've got really good friends who would EAT THAT UP. Like, yeah, it is beautifully poetic... hahaha now i'm laughing thinking about my friends who were really into Hamlet and Romeo & Juliet finding out about Sabo & Ace and being obsessed, ahaha (they're not so into One Piece tho, only jjk... at least, for now!! 😈)
it's hard to put into words, but there's something about Sabo being a revolutionary vs. ace and luffy being pirates, that kind of explains why my brain sees A+L as very very very different than A&S or L&S. But like, that's just my brain and how my heart likes to focus on characters with really codependent relationships/dreams/themes, hahaha...
#also if we're talking tragedy#so many people have said it better than i ever could but#the beauty and drama of marineford#i live in denial and usually like imagining a timeline where ace was severaly wounded but lived through it#but canon#gosh#ace dying in luffy's arms bc luffy was in danger and he had to protect him#and he only had to protect him bc luffy was too weak from fighting his way through hell for ace#the love was there and it mattered and it didn't change anything but it mattered etc etc i'm WAILING#i don't know i'm bad at explaining why one of those tragedies makes my brain feel things and the other one doesn't quite as much#i wish i could express it better!!! sometimes i'm so frustrated with how i feel like i'm not really getting across the point i meant to#ace had been looking for that love his whole life!! he died KNOWING he had it!! (also like i didn't mention whitebeard here but#all that love ace received being the exact reason he had to turn back....)#and luffy!! luffy knowing he mattered to ace so much--ace loved him so much--he would die for him....#and going forward with that rock-solid certainty that he's loved in the new world#i'm going to fight a traffic sign. i'm at a loss.#ANYWAY i don't know if this was interesting or annoying as an answer but....... hopefully it was at least a little fun?#and if we just connect with different things in one piece then--not too surprising#with how big the story is!!!#the beauty of fandom etc etc different perspectives coming together and all that#meta#op#asl
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annual realization where this gas station’s operations and my life owe it all to visualive i’m serious
#kommento#// thinking if i should put all my thoughts in the body of the post instead of tags like these but oh well it’s a quirk of mine#// friendship is so important to me cca is so important to me that one skit with that mention of cca is SO IMPORTANT TO ME friendship is so#// without vl i would have never think of adachi as affectionately as i do right now like no dojima hangout times are going to save me in#// any alternate timeline there’s no going back#// i would still love mimi yes but just in a different flavor#// i really don’t how how to describe that fork in the road but yeah i just /waves hands around/#// unlike most adachinators i develop adachis super weak and sad sympathy and basic morality with a gas station attendant instead#// of detective yaoi and family fun times#// you thinking adachi would win the idgaf war but those two skits in vl blow that all out of the water#// i mean there’s the rest of the game but like i commit favoritism crimes okay#// LITERALLY JUST TOSS HIS SOCIAL LINK AWAY for a second think about what adachi is think about him in the ps2 context#// LITERALLY JUST READ THE MANGA PLEASE i’ve had my theories tested and confirmed on how much you can care about tohruadachi#// at the bare minimum information you have on him and experiencing him as organically as possible IN THE ORIGINAL NON GOLDEN CONTEXT#// you could even go through the drama cds and see how genuine of an adachi he is like seriously forget the golden era and fanservice#// get bancho out of the equation and think about who is right now at that moment#// okay i’m tired now i’ll stop here but i wish people could just enjoy adachi more without the sentiment hes a fuckable antagonist#// dont romanticize his emptiness and hate for the world Like That but rather as human as he already is before you learn he’s a pawn for god#// adachis a special character to me genuinely i wish i could talk about him more often if i didn’t have chronic Not Like Other Girls diseas#// such a fun brain excercise sometimes just wish that i wasn’t poisoned by fandom and that fact they gave him a rep like this that makes me#// so embarrassed or even ashamed to say his name out loud and admit i like him#// LIKE close your eyes and forget hes the villain and he’s the murderer just look at him and think how and why he’s a fucked up guy underne#// underneath the goofball facade he pulls. now think and wonder how much of a genuine goofball he is#// it’s like thinking about ichinose except everyone else is a mysoginist that’s why they take don’t take her seriously#// okay adachi tag most used tag blogger is signing out goodnight guys mwa
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every time i start thinking about how we as a fandom should deal with gender identity and beauty standards and gender roles i get a headache before i even post
#1. gender identity in a strictly enforced binary world is going to be different and regardless all headcanons there are valid#2. yeah beauty standards are going to differ but that doesnt really matter because beauty =/= good#3. women are not obligated to be beautiful#4. oh my god pitting women against each other is not feminism doing this actively makes your stan less feminist#as an agender person this fandom feels like a fucking minefield sometimes but i havent even GOTTEN to the transphobia#asoiaf#my posts#a song of ice and fire#valyrianscrolls
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Every now and then some discourse pops up around a queer ship consisting of a pair of fictional characters who are not blood related, but refer to themselves as "brothers" or "sisters," or are in some way, according to the fandom, "sibling-coded."
Every time I see that discourse, all I can think about are the very real queer men I once knew, who, before their deaths, lived their lives posing as "stepbrothers." The only way to avoid suspicion for being two older unmarried men living together in a rural conservative area was to pretend they were from the same family, even though the truth was that they were lovers.
They were never out in life. Their relationship was a strict secret to nearly everyone. They never knew that I knew, and sometimes it fucks me up inside that they never got to come out to me. It fucks me up that they had to hide behind a fake "brotherly" relationship for their own safety. It fucks me up to look at a gravestone that reads "beloved brother" and know what it really means, and what it could have said if they'd lived under different circumstances.
In another world, they could have been husbands, but they never had the opportunity. The world will remember them as brothers, because, even in death, that is what was safest.
The freedom to declare queer love openly is something that not everyone has. And I think more people could stand to remember that.
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Real talk. I think the above image is a very good example of the subtle ways fans try to gaslight and manipulate others in a fandom. You don’t have to be verbally harassing the person to still be putting them down.
People should never belittle or demoralize a person simply because they have a different opinion on a fictional character. Regardless of how canon or head canon a character’s orientation or interests may be that gives no right to harass another living human being. It especially does not give the right to make judgement calls on the worth of their character and claim them to be homophobic or worse. It’s for this reason I normally keep my personal opinions quiet simply because I do not wish to gain the attention or ire of those sorts of individuals.
Long story short please be respectful to everyone, especially creators who put so much time and energy into their work. Just because their work does not match your “optimal vision” does not give you the right to judge them. Thank you!
My friend sent me the link to my art on pinterest (a person who uploaded it added credits so they're good, just in case), and after seeing this comment, I decided to vent a bit and let people know something, because it's not the first case like this for me.
Do not comment my art with these kinds of "fixes". My art is my art. You want Leosagi or Leo with male characters? Go and find artists who does it. There are plenty of those out there. I'm not one of those and won't ever be.
When you do something like this you devalue a person's work and simply trespassing their safe space. Not to mentions this is simply rude and feels insulting.
I'm not going on a constant crusade and leaving comments under Leosagi art, telling people to change it into Leo x Y/N or Fem character, so, please, have some respect.
I've been getting comments like this and after seeing this one on pinterest decided to make a post to make things clear, because
Have some conscience.
#little scared to post this but I think it’s important to support my fellow artists#Leosagi is fine#I really like some people’s interpretations of them#but bunny boi has kind of become the fandom’s doll that they can just make him into whatever suits their needs rather than a defined chara#this is because they’re drawing from different sources#sometimes he’s dumb as Leo sometimes he’s this sage like samurai sometimes he’s a jerk sometimes he’s a sweetheart#they’re still cute though#I just don’t think it’s fair to consider them to be the only option for Leo#also I think Leo is bi#mic drop in the tags#partially because I’m a bi Leo kin who had so little riz with either gender everyone thought I was gay#also that boy could never deny half the world’s population from adoring him#but that’s just my headcanon#lmao#sorry for the downer I just think this in important to remind and reflect on within any fandom#Ted talk#anti harassment#tw harassment
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lucky this blog only goes back to when id already finished school or id have to go and delete everything
#pretty sure i did actually have a blog when i was at school only it was a different one or something or i didnt post or i already deleted ev#everything#i really cant remember though#not that not being a school kid makes me not cringe or anything thats disproven enough#actually i didnt really make these random personale posts for my own audience then i only made fandom posts i got annoyed no one read#it probably wouldve been good for me though if id thought of it and could bring myself to and it seperate to any other rubbish i had#i did actually write a journal in year 13 which i dont do anymore since i suppose i movd to this#and i probably wasnt self aware enough before then#it wouldve been too embarrassing to even write in a journal let alone the internet#though sometimes this is actually less weirder than a journal cause thats meant to be just you#but as this is technically public i can hide behind stuff like having a personaality#even though i dont really have one#but anyway i think i do get to present stuff more here so i caan change the tone tto suit me#not that the journal was totally neutral but it was meant to be more authentic inside me this is still sort of outside me#aand really you only have a self through interacting with the world and formiing a personality through experiences#that journal wass actually ridiculously pretentious at times though other times it was like my normal real life voice
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