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tightjeansjavi · 6 months

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The Rite of Movement | drabble

“Rosy”

A/N: I swear ideas hit me at the most random moments ever 💀 after not writing for a bit and coming back to a kinda awkward work situation, it felt good to write something silly and hot! I admittedly was thinking of my wife @strang3lov3 (who also made this sexy lil mood board) when I wrote this 🤭 enjoy!

~word count: 1.6k~

Summary: pornhub sent you a package containing new sex toys that just hit the market! Joel wants a tutorial on how the rose toy works ;)

Pairing | pornstar!joel x pornstar!female reader

Warnings: smut, fluff, use of sex toys, established relationship, teasing, flirting, real intimacy, oral (f!receiving) adult content, mentions of the porn industry, potential succession spoilers, Joel is in his 40’s reader is in her 30’s, readers nickname is baby love, reader has no physical descriptions, +18 minors dni!

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“Personally, I think the rose toy is the most affordable oral pleasure toy on the market. While it doesn’t entirely replicate the feeling of oral sex, it comes pretty damn close in my opinion.” You spoke sweetly in front of the camera that was positioned at the foot of the bed.

Pornhub had personally sent you a box of new sex toys that had just hit the market and they wanted you to post a review of the toys to your instagram reels (safe for work, of course). From suction cupped dildos, to rabbit ear vibrators, you had a plethora of toys to try out. And while this was originally planned to be a solo content video…that all went to shit when Joel strolled upstairs, dripping in sweat from the top of his head all the way down to his toes. Shirtless, glistening tan skin that was begging to feel your hot tongue drag across it.

“What’re you up to, baby love?” He rasped, strong back leaned against the doorframe, broad arms crossed against his chest, damp towel draped across his shoulder.

“Filming some content for the hub. They sent me a package of new sex toys that just hit the market.” You looked over at him with a small grin.

He hummed in response, pushing himself off the side of the door and strolled into the bedroom. “S’that so? Mind if I take a look at what we got goin’ on here? Maybe you and I will have to try somethin’ out later.” He said suggestively with a coy wink.

“I tried the rose toy out after my shower earlier. It’s actually pretty neat, and for the price point, I think it’s a decent replacement for the real deal.” You patted the spot next to you on the bed, not caring about the fact that he was still drenched in sweat. Neither you or Joel were shy when it came to bodily fluids.

“Ohh. Is that the toy that claims to be comparable to gettin’ eaten out?” He sat down alongside you, taking the rose shaped toy from between your hands and studied it with an amused expression on his face. “Well, I’ll be damned.” He chuckled, looking over at you with a small grin playing on his lips. “Care to give me a tutorial on how this ‘lil sucker works?”

You fought the urge to roll your eyes at your boyfriend's cheeky request and gave him a light shove to the shoulder with your hand. “How about you cut past the formalities and just say that you want to see my pussy, Joel.”

He laughed, warm and deep, rumbling up his chest as he met your challenging gaze. He leaned over, brushing his thumb across the plump flesh of your lower lip, “sweet girl, I always want to see your pretty pussy, but m’curious. Wanna see what all the fuss is about over this rose toy.”

“You’re that curious, huh? Well, I suppose I could give you the tutorial on how it works, baby. But I’m lazy and came already, mind helping me out?” You batted your lashes at him flirtatiously just as he leaned in to land a quick peck on your pretty lips.

“Course I can. Cus’ I know how much work it is for ya to take off those flimsy ‘lil panties of yours.” He quipped teasingly. “I’ll do all the work for my girl. Jus’ lay on your back and guide me through it, ‘kay?”

“God, I love you so much.” You mumbled into his lips, kissing him sweetly with your fingers gently scraping through the patches in his beard eliciting a low hum to vibrate up his chest.

“Love you more, baby love. Now, chop chop. Gonna run us a nice relaxing bath later with a freshly rolled joint.” He kissed you once more and gently patted the inside of your thigh with that big warm palm of his. “Might need you to rub my back later. Lifted a bit too hard at the gym with Tommy.”

“Whatever you want, baby. I’ll happily soak in the tub with you and rub your back afterwards.” You slowly detached your lips from the shared kiss, scooting yourself back against the array of pillows and plopped down on your back, thighs already spread to accommodate the breadth of his shoulders.

“And we’ll order whatever take out you’d like and catch up on the episode of Succession that we left off on. Need to find out if Roman and Gerri are gonna fuck, or if he just likes to be degraded by her.” He added with a chuckle, maneuvering himself to rest on his elbows between your spread thighs.

“God, Joel. Don’t stop! Keep talking dirty to me like that!” You said playfully, peeking down at him just as he looped his thumbs into the elastic band of your panties and slowly began to pull them down over your hips.

“You’re a piece of work today, y’know that baby love?” He shook his head with a grin, pressing a chaste kiss to the inside of your thigh, nipping at the plush flesh playfully with his teeth. “Roman Roy getting degraded really get you goin?’”

“Absolutely. He’s fucking sexy, and I would let Kieran Culkin do absolutely heinous things to me.” (Me too girl, me too). “Now, there’s a button on the side, and basically the center part suctions in air around your clit imitating what oral sex feels like. Only downside is that you have to place it directly against your clit otherwise you don’t get that sensation.”

“Fascinating.” He mused, pulling your panties down over your ankles and tossed them to the side. “It vibrates too, right?”

“Mhm.” You nodded, reaching behind you to adjust the pillows behind your head so you were more comfortable. “Another downside is that it’s pretty fucking loud. Not that we have to worry about that sorta thing here, but if someone is buying it to be discreet? Probably isn’t the right choice for them.”

The evidence of your prior orgasm was staring Joel right in his admiring gaze, puffy lips, glistening folds and a bead of pearlescent cum dripping from your weeping hole. It was a sight that he was certain he’d never tire from. He pressed the on button, listening to the device whir to life. “Does it have multiple settings as well?”

“Yeah, it does. Eight I think? I’ve tried them all, but I’m old school when it comes to that. I also didn’t believe that it could get me off in less than five minutes, but it sure gets the job done.”

“Less than five minutes? Damn, okay, little rose toy. I see you.” He rasped, brows furrowed as he gazed into the center opening of the toy, trying to decipher how the mechanics of it worked.

“Yep! I was pretty shocked myself, but it doesn’t compare to your tongue, Joel. There’s no competition there.” You reassured him, but then again, Joel never found himself to be intimated or threatened by sex toys.

“Don’t doubt that for a second, baby love.” he chuckled. “Want me to play with ya a little, or just let the toy do all the work?”

“So tempting, baby. But for the purpose of science, I just want you to see how it works up close.” You said softly.

“Sure thing, baby love. Whatever you want from me, pretty girl s’yours.” He spit a glob of saliva right into the center of the toy as he was curious to see how it would operate with the excess moisture. He placed it between your thighs, first gently gliding it between your folds, and then dragging the suction part of it over your clit. He dropped his head down, getting up close and personal with your pussy so he could see the little device suckle on your clit.

You let out a content sigh, relaxing further into the comforter as your body slowly began to buzz back to life, the nerve endings in your clit tingling and pulsing from the moderate sensation. “Yeah, just like that.” You spread your thighs further, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks from the sight of Joel intently studying your pussy. “But you see what I mean about the noise level? It’s not very discreet at all.”

He shook his head, licking his lips as his eyes flickered from between your thighs and up to your face. “Yeah, it’s not very discreet at all, huh? I get the appeal, though. It’s feminine, dainty, shaped like a flower. Looks extremely pretty sucking on that sweet little clit of yours, baby love.” He rasped lowly, tone dripping in arousal.

“Joel.” You warned, eyes narrowing at the smirk slowly creeping over his lips.

“What?” He chuckled. “M’jus’ makin’ an accurate observation based on the view I’m gettin.’”

“Yeah, but somehow—someway, everything that leaves your mouth sounds fucking hot. Feminine, dainty, shaped like a flower? Are you trying to kill me, Joel?” You asked playfully, keening your hips forward when the suction part of the toy slipped off your clit.

“Thought we were jus’ doin’ this for science, baby love?” He teased, “Unless…your pussy wants somethin’ a little more than what this toy can provide.” He trailed off, eyes staying locked on yours.

“Damn you, Miller.” You huffed, throwing your head back as you muttered under your breath, “Well, maybe just for science, we should compare the toy to the real deal?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” He winked coyly, pressing the off button and tossed the silicone toy in the direction of the box laying on the bed. He wasted no time to grab the underside of your thighs, pulling you down further with your ankles locked around the back of his head. The second his tongue swirled around your clit, and his lips wrapped around the bud and sucked inwards, that little flower shaped toy could not even compare to Joel Miller and his skillful tongue splitting you open and making you sing his name.

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madamefeu · 1 month

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Which characters in Hazbin Hotel can say the F word that means a not nice word for gay? Here’s another list:

Charlie: She can say it, but chooses not to. She would never say it, even to the higher ups of Heaven

Vaggie: Can say it, regularly says it to insult the hotel guests because let’s be real she hates everyone

Angel Dust: He can absolutely say it, and he calls himself a faggot on the regular

Husk: Can say it, but doesn't say it. There are far worse words for him to say, and he'll use those instead

Alastor: Can't say it, but he has far too much class to say it even if he could

Niffty: Can't say it, but thinks that she can because she has one gay friend (Angel). Alastor has taken to covering her mouth when she tries to say it in public

Cherri Bomb: She can say it, and when she does it sounds like she's calling you an affectionate nickname rather than a slur

Sir Pentious: He can say it, but only because it meant a bundle of sticks in his time period. If he wasn't from a time before it became a not nice word for gay, he wouldn't be allowed to say it

Rosie: Can't say it, but if she did it would sound like she's calling you sweetheart, like, she is so lovely

Lucifer: No, he cannot say it. He’s not a twink, he just likes being short and pathetic so that he can get powerful women to step on him. If being stepped on by women was a sport, he’d win the gold medal every time

Lillith: She is a hot goth dommy mommy, she can say it

Vox: He's dating another man, he can say it

Valentino: Can say it, but he never does because he'll use much worse words on his employees than faggot

Velvette: She calls Vox and Valentino faggots under her breath to get through her day. She can say it

Adam: Can't say it, but says it anyway and no one can stop him because he's too high ranking for anyone in Heaven to do anything about him saying it

Lute: Can say it, but won't say it unless you call her it first

Sera: Can say it, but never would, because unlike Adam, she wants to uphold the standards of Heaven

Emily: Doesn’t know the word, and lord help us the day she finds out because she’ll use it as the legal definition without realising that it’s a slur

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