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pinkaditty · 6 months ago

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Random HCs About Obey Me! Dateables (minus Newspaper Club)

a/n: hello my lovelies! me again! im writing as much as i can 2 re-accommodate myself 2 posting and such. lack of motivation and executive dysfunction have really been hitting hard lately, so id appreciate lots of love on my recent works! i need a good boost i think. wah anyway, im working on your requests! im working on multiple at once which is why its taking so long. ill be pumping out three at once, with any luck! please cheer me on raaaaaahhh!!!!

summary: a little blurb about some hcs i have for the demons, humans, and angels of Obey Me! minus Luke and the Newspaper Club. I promise 2 make more content of them later though! most of these hcs are anatomy and personality based.

cw: nsfw (MINORS DNI), suggestive, mentions of monsterfucking, seduction, monster traits (slit pupils, scales, feathers, wings, pointed ears, fangs, etc), as well as detailed descriptions of odd bodily morphisms. its probably not as bad as i have listed here but viewer discretion is advised regardless. NOT PROOFREAD! there will probably be lots of typos :(

MINORS DNI! THIS POST IS SUGGESTIVE AND WILL LATER LEAD INTO AN NSFW POST! PLEASE RESPECT MY BOUNDARY!

IMPORTANT INFO BEFORE WE BEGIN that I hc that the brothers and other demons all have different demon forms. Like, they have their mostly human forms (Form 1), but then they have their in-game demon forms (Form 2), and then on top of that, they have a second, less humanoid, more monsterish demon form (Form 3), and then past that, they have a full monster demon form (Form 4, monsterfuckers unite!!!1!). ill get into those hcs later. side note that i also believe the demon dateables have heat cycles and will make a separate post detailing that.

General overview (a more thorough one will be created later):

Form 1: Human form that the demon dateables have in-game. Some monster traits are still there, such as unusually large teeth and fangs, pointed ears, and odd morphisms (strangely shaped pupils, strangely shaped tongue, strangely colored flesh, retractable claws and teeth, etc).

Form 2: Humanoid demon form that the demon dateables have in-game. More monster traits are revealed, such as scales, horns, tails, fins, wings, and any other traits, including more exaggerated traits that are suppressed in their humanoid form (longer and pointier ears, more obvious slit pupils, sharp fangs and retractable teeth and claws no longer repressed, etc).

Form 3: Monster-like demon form, but still vaguely humanoid. Whatever demon features they have are extremely exaggerated instead of repressed, and scales, feathers, or any other features they have become more prominent, widespread, and obvious.

Form 4: Full on Monster demon. They become the animals they represent. For example, Leviathan literally BECOMES the monster leviathan, the impossibly large sea serpent. Asmodeus would become a manticore, Beelzebub would be a fly-bull hybrid, Belphegor is a cow minotaur but more monsterish, if that makes sense. etc etc im sure you have got it figured out.

Anyways, lets get into it!

Demon Brothers:

Lucifer:

His feathers r constantly shedding. like. constantly. when he transforms into his demon form it's just a burst of feathers.

when he's in his humanoid demon form (Form 2) he'll have wings behind his ears. they're small and heavy.

Surprisingly doesn't mind when MC preens his feathers or horns and genuinely enjoys it. He purrs at the feeling. will not encourage you to do it though.

achy back because his wings, while smaller, became heavier. sits down a lot and relaxes his back muscles often. will never have incorrect posture bc of this.

has a tail but it's like. just feathers. he's slightly embarrassed about it because it sticks straight out and he cannot manipulate it whatsoever.

Has small feathery spots on his body when he's in humanoid demon form (Form 2). Like, the center of his chest, back of his neck, cheekbones, and his ankles all grow feathers when he transforms.

only wears reading glasses. his eyesight actually isn't that bad, it just helps him see things clearer.

hates it when his room smells like him like he just can't stand it. on occasion his brothers will come in and just randomly spend time in there when he's not working. the smell of family helps him relax.

actually enjoys the nickname Lucy but won't admit that.

is genuinely a good cook just doesn't do it often because of all the work he has to do.

bleeds a deep blue with a thin red sheen. black gums and oral flesh. not due to health issues they're just like that; the fall physically altered their bodies in more ways than one. also has retractable fangs but they're non-existent when retracted. his mouth is just incisors literally.

long, flat tongue. pointed and sharp at the end.

Mammon:

hates the color green. nothing wrong with anyone wearing it but he cannot stand the color anywhere in his room or on him.

has partial tritanopia. it mostly affects his red/purple vision. can see most colors pretty okay, though. especially green and god he hates it.

ok please hear me out: he's got bad eyesight. you will never catch him without contacts or glasses because he will not be caught lacking ever again.

has pointed ears. very sharp and long.

he actually does have a tail, but not in the humanoid demon form (Form 2). when he gets to the next stage, a more humanoid monsterish demon (Form 3), his tail sprouts from his lower back. not very long, but very sharp, scaly, and has spines on the back.

has and will use his horns as corkscrews. easy solution!

has retractable claws in his hands and feet

flaps his wings indignantly to get attention, especially around MC or to overpower overlapping voices. something about them commands attention and he's proud of it.

bleeds gold and has a black tongue like Lucifer, but golden oral flesh. can't explain it i just feel it in my soul.

his blood is naturally corrosive. will literally burn not only your skin, but the skin of his brothers as well. can dissolve metals in seconds. do not let him bleed around you.

has generally sharp teeth, his canines being longer and sharper. teeth have a nice golden sheen to them. the first time you saw his teeth u were convinced he was wearing grills cuz????

thick black forked tongue but fork is not very prominent. presents more like a split tongue than a fork.

his tongue is also super abrasive. has tiny keratin projections like a cat's tongue. won't really hurt if he licks you but it's a weird sensation.

Leviathan:

can't hear well above ground and needs a greater water pressure to hear better. he's a deep sea demon so it's a little obvious.

responds better to light than color and actually also can't differentiate between colors very well. deep sea thing, it's the light that matters more than the color of it. he can still see color, just that physically speaking, flipping his lights on and off will get his attention quicker than holding a paper in front of his face.

since he's a deep sea demon, and there's lots of pressure in the deep sea, his body expands when he's above sea level, hence: he is slightly chubby (round face, protruding pudgy tummy, you can't exactly tell because he always dresses baggy). argue with the wall.

pupils are more slit-like. still rounded in humanoid form (Form 1) but definitely slit-like. become fully slits when he's in his humanoid demon form (Form 2).

has two sets of eyelids; 2nd set is clear and behind his normal eyelids. they close horizontally and are used to protect his eyes in saltwater and allow him to see.

has gills (located on neck and sides of his torso) and therefore has a greater lung capacity than any of his brothers. his gills are also sensitive and somewhat erogenous. ask before you touch them please or else he'll jump out of his skin.

neck is very long. is actually the second tallest of the brothers, you just can't tell because of how much he slouches.

has fins behind his ears, on his forearms, and on his calves and ankles. they are large, shimmery, and a blue-purple color. not super sensitive but be gentle when you touch them bc they're privy to tear.

can flap his fins and does this when he's excited.

has scales all over his body in humanoid demon form (Form 2), randomly placed in thick groups (shoulder blades, cheeks, neck, hips). they are small, smooth, shimmery, and midnight blue.

will often swim around in his aquarium. is on good terms with every creature he has in there and is always bringing a new one.

he constantly looks wet because his scales and fins are so shimmery but he's not wet he's just shiny.

tail is actually very thin and brittle at the end. will grow back if it breaks off but he's not fond of that happening. it's much stronger and heavier at the base. he can crush a human femur with that.

pointed ears like Mammon, even in his humanoid form (Form 1).

bleeds orange, has lavender gums and oral flesh. seven rows of fangs, and the lesser four are retractable. also has the longest fangs of his brothers.

forked tongue forked tongue!! it's very very long and thin and deep blue. his taste buds are scattered among the inside of his mouth rather than on his tongue.

it's also abrasive, like Mammon's, but his tongue will actually hurt. like, actually, unless it's the underside.

Satan:

can't remember where I saw this but someone said his feather boa is a collection of Lucifer's feathers and I wholeheartedly agree. that's exactly what they are. he does this out of spite.

his hands are abnormally large, on par with Beel's size. all the better to destroy with!

i know what the website says but they're taller in my hcs anyway. and I headcanon that he's the shortest. he's the smallest. by like, one inch shorter than Asmo (who i hc to be abt 6'2-5, so Satan is just under that range). it's so unfortunate BUT he grows into the second tallest when he transforms into his full demon form :] (Form 4)

can hear and see very well. has one of the most heightened senses of the brothers.

also has slit-like pupils like Levi.

has retractable claws in both his hands and feet.

has two thick, protruding black ridges on his back leading to his tail. they are scaly and of the same material as his horns. they present more like a heavily ridged spine in his humanoid form (Form 1), but they become more obvious in his humanoid demon form (Form 2).

loves to stare at cats at midnight because his eyes are the same shape as theirs at that time. will often sneak out to find a cat and simply stare.

his tail is scaly, but not like Levi's. the scales are much bigger and thicker, like uneven chunks of metal.

the end of it is pointed

his tail isn't really sensitive, but it is ticklish if you can get to the skin underneath the scales.

has small gauges. can't explain it, these are the only piercings he has.

bleeds a bright, sickly green. has forest green gums and oral flesh. Teeth are normal but his canines are heavily pronounced, longer and sharper than the surrounding teeth. his molars are also abnormally sharp, the edges pointed and elongated.

tongue is forked like Mammon's in that it presents more like a split tongue. his is barely there. also, has teeth on his tongue. small fangs along the sides of it. it's a sickly green. Mammon hates watching Satan talk.

Asmodeus:

His pupils are horizontal bars, like that of a goat. surprisingly unnoticeable unless you stare.

has never gotten a single blemish on his skin ever but that doesn't stop him from using skincare products anyway!

naturally smells like roses, but around humans, he smells like their deepest desires.

his wings are not very strong. he can't fly for very long or very high either.

he has a birthmark the shape of a lipstick kiss mark on his left hip. he's so proud of it and will show it off unprovoked.

has very light, almost unnoticeable freckles. doesn't like to cover them up because when he goes full manticore demon form (Form 3 and 4), his whiskers show up in the same area. it's uncomfortable.

his ears are pointed slightly. not as much as Mammon's, but still pointed.

very frail. not necessarily a bad thing, just surprising. his health could shatter instantaneously. while he may not die from something, he could be bedridden for a while.

bleeds a glittery pink and his blood is a natural aphrodisiac. gums and oral flesh appear normal but are actually an unsettlingly bright pink color. has fangs, most of his teeth are slightly pointed. they're the sharpest fangs of the brothers.

forked tongue except it's in three segments. they're all shaped like normal tongues but abnormally long and the middle one is the longest. bright pink and slightly abrasive. also pretty thick. has some of his taste buds on his bottom jaw.

Beelzebub:

also has horizontal bars for pupils. also strangely unnoticeable unless you stare.

the largest, tallest, and bulkiest of his brothers, but weighs slightly less than Mammon and Lucifer because their wings are particularly heavy.

you never have to worry about him choking because he won’t. it always goes down the right pipe i promise.

is a great cook! can never finish though. the ingredients are gone before he’s finished. hes the type to make cookie dough and then eat the dough. never making the cookies. it’s not his fault though he’s just super hungry.

MC and Belphie work together to provide Beel with a secret stash of food so that he doesn’t always clear out the fridge. it’s a win-win.

wings are very lightweight, as are his horns. he never beats his wings because he sounds like a giant fly when he does and it has disturbed more than enough people at this point. will buzz them when eating particularly good food. he can’t help that.

has antennae along with his horns. long, thin, and black. almost invisible if you don’t pay attention.

can communicate with flies and other small insects but doesn’t bother to do so very often. will tell them to stay away from MC if MC doesn’t like bugs.

bleeds red, but an odd oversaturated and bright red. gums and oral flesh are the same color, but his tongue is black. not forked, but very flat and long, allowing for more room for food in his mouth and down his throat.

all of his teeth are fangs except for his molars for grinding. his molars, however, have elongated sharp edges like Satan’s. teeth are stained red at the roots so it appears that his teeth are bloody. they’re not, they’re just like that.

when starving, his saliva and blood are extremely, extremely acidic. will dissolve skin in seconds. when just typically hungry, it's about as acidic as gastric acid.

Belphegor:

can switch back and forth between normal vision and negative light vision. usually sees in negative because his eyes are too tired and everything is constantly bright :(

also has horizontal bar pupils like Beel and Asmo.

eyes droop downwards and have a hypnotizing look to them (both Beel and Asmo have this as well). the three younger brothers are particularly good at human seduction because of this trait.

is the youngest and therefore has the youngest brother attitude. iykyk.

is probably more of a troublemaker than Mammon is. Mammon may be in financial debt but Belphie is in moral debt. Will embarrass all of his brothers (except Beel sometimes) and think nothing of it. doesn’t always get away with stuff though. what goes around comes around…!

would not be as close with Satan as he is canonically if they didn’t have hating Lucifer in common. but because they do have that in common, they’ve found other things to like about each other. Satan will keep quiet reading in the library if Belphie is napping there and in turn Belphie will spare Satan from the next round of exposing his brothers. win-win.

he resembles a satyr in his humanoid demon form (Form 2). his lower half is covered with spotted cow fur and his feet become hooves.

tail is a mix of scales and fur. the scales are closer to the root of his tail, on his body, and eventually becomes more fur as it reaches the tip.

when angry or upset, will whip his tail around and crack it on the nearest hard surface (floor, table, wall, etc) multiple times. it sounds like a whip and is very startlingly loud.

gets angry a lot. is also surprisingly very very expressive.

has vitiligo and his spots are where the fur in his full demon form are lighter colors.

has retractable claws but doesn't often use them.

bleeds purple with a red sheen. gums and oral flesh are black, but his tongue is purple.

has fangs, but they're probably the least prominent of his brothers. closest to normal human canines. however, he has the second strongest bite force of the brothers (first strongest is beel, third is satan).

Dateable Side Characs:

Diavolo:

naturally high body temperature. constantly warm. how does he not sweat so much? we'll never know.

his horns at the base are very sensitive. like, extremely. he'll jump 10 feet if your fingers brush against them.

his laugh is naturally extra like that. he doesn't mean to be extra it's just like that.

secretly really wants to make a pact with MC but obviously can't, for multiple reasons. feels left out :/

his yawns are almost as animated and ridiculous as his laugh is. he's so silly.

totally a morning person. ask him to stay up late and he will conk out immediately.

very fond of and fascinated with humans and is enamored every time he talks to MC or Solomon. never lets it show. Barbatos knows, though.

is only one more inch taller than Beel.

ik it's canon that none of the brothers are as strong as Dia but I like to hc that he'd have a hard time fighting any of them, Beel especially. if both of them were lucid and fully aware, Dia would eventually come out on top, but not without a grueling struggle.

his bodily fluids are as hot as magma. didn't even notice because of how warm he is until MC got burned from eating off the same spoon as him.

bleeds a brighter gold than Mammon. gums and oral flesh are also gold, but his tongue is black and forked similar to Mammon's.

huge fangs. they stick out of his lips sometimes.

his eyes aren't like the younger three demon brothers, but they can be very hypnotizing. he can't turn it on or off, so everyone usually ends up relenting to him because of it. except Barbatos and Thirteen, they are the only two immune to it.

Barbatos:

in contrast to Dia this guy is constantly freezing. like touch his hands or neck and you'll feel like you've got frostbite.

it's physically impossible for him to offer body warmth so just accept his tea instead

is a total tea enthusiast. even he doesn't know why. he just loves finding new teas to make.

similarly enamored with humans, but particularly with MC. less so with Solomon because he’s just not like other humans.

his power is definitely on par with Dia’s, if not more. this is why he was absolutely a necessary ally to Dia. Barbatos would be far worse as a neutral party or enemy.

there isn’t much he isn’t good at except board games. for whatever reason, if it’s not chess, he just can’t get the hang of it. even monopoly confuses him but he always somehow ends up owning the boardwalk. dumb luck or his sin? we may never know.

has gills like Levi along his neck and sides. his are much larger, however, and grow into patterned grooves on his back.

he has long hair. i know it's short in canon but in my heart? his hair is longer, like down to his mid-back. all of his hair is like a gradient, except it's slanted, if that makes sense. more hair will be teal on his left than on his right, and the gradient continues at an angle.

haaaaates taking off his gloves unless it's to touch people he loves. for example, he'll slip them off to pat Luke on the head or squeeze Dia's shoulder or to hug MC.

his hands are perfect, btw. inexplicably perfect. something about the bone structure in his hands is just so alluring.

his tail is cold and constantly slimy. not unhygienic, just slimy. also very strong. he can lift and hold heavy things pretty well with it.

hates rats AND mice. both are committers of unforgivable crimes to him. but he's a bit of a scaredy cat. will yelp and hide behind the closest person (except Luke and most of the demon brothers) if a rat or mouse appears suddenly.

bleeds a shimmery paris green. gums and oral flesh are the same color. his teeth are a blinding white, though. hard to look at.

tongue is similar to his tail in appearance and shape, except segmented into three like Asmodeus’s tongue. it's also freezing cold.

yk how i said asmodeus has the sharpest fangs of the brothers? well this guy has the sharpest fangs period. literally. his tongue and oral flesh is a bit thick to prevent his teeth from constantly cutting the inside of his mouth.

Simeon:

hair is really coily. idc what his hair looks like canonically. it's coily to me. also naturally soft and perfect like he has effortlessly perfect coils.

lips are pretty thick, probably has the thickest lips of all characters. suuuuper kissable. two-toned.

he is naturally constantly the perfect amount of warm. cuddles and hugs and small touches from him are always perfect because he's always the right temperature.

has the toothiest, goofiest grins ever. he doesn't grin often though. usually he just smiles.

is surprisingly super petty and will not let shit slide. will not. don't try it bc he's not the one.

he KNOWS his outfit is a little revealing. he KNOWS when you're looking. and no, he won't stop you nor is he ashamed of it, but he will chide you if you go too far.

will always be bad with technology and will always beat Barbatos in board games. except chess.

began writing TSL as an outlet for his wrath. it was therapeutic and worked to dissolve his wrath, but he does continue to struggle with it.

is actually super clever and knowing. on par with Barbatos and Solomon in terms of sheer knowledge. it just isn't readily apparent about him.

isn't exactly fond of stormy weather because his outfits include elaborate capes and he hates it when they get caught up in the wind and no longer appear elegant

dresses like a fall christian girl when it's cold out. sweaters and skinny jeans galore.

has normal oral flesh and gums, the only difference is that unlike other angels, Simeon has unusually sharp and long canines.

normal tongue too, nothing to worry about.

Solomon:

he knows how to cook. he just loves how doing it incorrectly always manages to piss people off. he gets a good kick out of it.

has been alive for a very long time but still can't read analog clocks right, especially ones without numbers.

will occasionally disguise himself as a college student and attend classes to keep himself up to date with what is being taught. usually erases memories of students and teachers once he's done attending.

he knows he's immortal but he likes to live like he can die via regular things that could kill a human.

isn’t exactly an asshole, is just somehow an expert at pissing everyone off. he’s genuinely likeable, he’s just never gotten enough of how funny it is to piss people off.

is still human but hanging around demons and angels has changed him in odd ways. for example, he’ll have an oddly strong sense of virtue, but at the same time value corruption.

obviously is on the side of humans, no matter what happens. its why he’s so attached to MC despite MC being very close with the brothers. secretly, he wants MC to choose him, too.

normal human anatomy unfortunately.

pays for his immortality in purity. it is why Thirteen mentioned his flame still sparkles, but it’s different. his soul becomes less pure and more corrupted the longer he lives on. ultimately this has no effect on his health, but it simply states that there’s really only one option for his afterlife.

totally normal human anatomy. is surprisingly really healthy and doesn’t often get sick.

a/n: wellllll that's all for now yippee!!!!!!!!! i hope you all enjoyed my little hcs. ive had this in the drafts for, like... a very long time, but just never got around 2 posting it, so i hope you all enjoy this. please leave a like, comment, and a reblog if you liked this post! i love 2 know that you all enjoy my works! also, if u have hcs about the demon dateables that you'd like to share, PLEASE TELL ME!!! i love sharing and discussing hcs, especially anatomy ones! its so much fun!!!

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literary-illuminati · 3 months ago

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2024 Book Review #41 – Japan 1941: Countdown to Infamy by Eri Hotta

Almost everything I know about World War 2, I learned against my will through a poorly spent adolescence and reading people argue about it online. Living in Canada, Japan’s role in it is even more obscure, with the wars in the Pacific and China getting a fraction of a fraction of the official commemoration and pop culture interest of events in Europe. So I went into this book with a knowledge of only the vague generalities of Japanese politics in the ‘30s and ‘40s – from that baseline, this was a tremendously interesting and educational book, if at times more than a bit dry.

The book is a very finely detailed narrative of the internal deliberations within the Japanese government and the diplomatic negotiations with the USA through late 1940 and 1941, which ultimately culminate in the decision to attack Pearl Harbour and invade European colonies across the Pacific. It charts the (deeply dysfunctional) decision-making systems of the Imperial Japanese government and how bureaucratic politics, factional intrigue and positioning, and an endemic unwillingness to be the one to back down and eat your words, made a war with the USA first possible, then plausible, then seemingly inevitable. Throughout this, the book wears its thesis on its sleeve – that the war in the Pacific only ever seemed inevitable, that until the very last hour there was widespread understanding that the war would be near-unwinnable across the imperial government and military, but a broken political culture, the career suicide of being the one to endorse accepting American demands,, and a simple lack of courage or will among the doves, prevented anything from ever coming of it.

So I did know that Imperial Japan’s government had, let’s say, fundamental structural issues when I opened the book, but I really wasn’t aware of just how confused and byzantine the upper echelons of it were. Like if Brazil was about the executive committee – the army and navy ministries had entirely separate planning infrastructures from the actual general staffs, and all of them were basically silo’d off from the actual economic and industrial planning bureaucracy (despite the fact that the head of the Cabinet Planning Board was a retired general). All of which is important, because the real decisions of war and peace were made in liaison meetings with the prime minister, foreign minister, and both ministry and general staff of each branch – meetings which were often as not just opportunities for grandstanding and fighting over the budget. The surprise is less that they talked themselves into an unwinnable war and more that they decided on anything at all.

The issue, as Hotta frames it, is that there really wasn’t a single place the buck stopped – officially speaking, the civilian government and both branches of the military served the pleasure of the Emperor – whose theoretically absolute authority was contained by both his temperament and both custom and a whole court bureaucracy dedicated to making sure the prestige of the throne didn’t get mired in and discredited by the muck of politics. The entire Meiji Constitution was built around the presence of a clique of ‘imperial advisers’ who could borrow the emperor’s authority without being so restrained – but as your Ito Hirobumis and Yamagata Aritomos died off, no one with the same energy, authority and vision ever seems to have replaced them.

So you had momentous policy decisions presented as suggestions to the emperor who could agree and thus turn them into inviolable commands, and understood by the emperor as settled policy who would provide an apolitical rubber-stamp on. Which, combined with institutional cultures that strongly encouraged being a good soldier and not undercutting or hurting the image of your faction, led to a lot of people quietly waiting for someone else to stand up and make a scene for them (or just staying silent and wishing them well when they actually did).

Now, this is all perhaps a bit too convenient for many of the people involved – doubtless anyone sitting down and writing their memoirs in 1946 would feel like exaggerating their qualms about the war as much as they could possibly get away with. I feel like Hotta probably takes those post-war memoirs and interviews too much at face value in terms of people’s unstated inner feeling – but on the other hand, the bureaucratic records and participants’ notes preserved from the pivotal meetings themselves do seem to show a great deal of hesitation and factional doubletalk. Most surprisingly to me was the fact that Tojo (who I had the very vague impression was the closest thing to a Japanese Hitler/Mussolini there was) was actually chosen to lead a peace cabinet and find some 11th hour way to avert the war. Which in retrospect was an obviously terrible decision, but it was one he at least initially tried to follow through on.

If the book has a singular villain, it’s actually no Tojo (who is portrayed as, roughly, replacement-rate bad) but Prince Konoe, the prime minister who actually presided over Japan’s invasion of China abroad and slide into a militarized police state at home, who led the empire to the very brink of war with the United States before getting cold feet and resigning at the last possible moment to avoid the responsibility of either starting the war or of infuriating the military and destroying his own credibility by backing down and acceding to America’s demands. He’s portrayed as, not causing, but exacerbating

every one of Japan’s structural political issues through a mixture of cowardice and excellent survival instincts – he carefully avoided fights he might lose, even when that meant letting his foreign minister continue to sabotage negotiations he supported while he arranged support to cleanly remove him (let alone really pushing back on the army). At the same time, the initiatives he did commit were all things inspired by his deep fascination with Nazi Germany – the dissolution of partisan political parties and creation of an (aspirationally, anyway) totalitarian Imperial Rule Assistance Association, the creation of a real militarized police state, the heavy-handed efforts to create a more pure and patriotic culture. He’s hardly to blame for all of that, of course, but given that he was a civilian politician initially elected to curb military influence, his governments sure as hell didn’t help anything (and it is I suppose just memorably ironic that he’s the guy on the spot for many of the most military-dictatorship-e aspects of Japanese government).

One of the most striking things about the book is actually not even part of the main narrative but just the background context of how badly off Japan was even before they attacked the United States. I knew the invasion of China hadn’t exactly been going great, but ‘widespread rationing in major cities, tearing up wrought iron fencing in the nicest districts of the capital to use in war industry’ goes so much further than I had any sense of. The second Sino-Japanese War was the quintessential imperial adventure and war of choice, and also just literally beyond the material abilities of the state of Japan to sustain in conjunction with normal civilian life. You see how the American embargo on scrap metal and petroleum was seen as nearly an act of war in its own right. You also wonder even more how anyone could possibly have convinced themselves that an army that was already struggling to keep its soldiers fed could possibly win an entirely new war with the greatest industrial power on earth. Explaining which is of course the whole point of the book (they didn’t, in large part, but convinced themselves the Americans wouldn’t have the stomach for it and agree to a favourable peace quickly, or that Germany would conquer the UK and USSR and impose mediation on Japan’s terms, or-).

When trying to understand the decision-making process, I’m honestly reminded of nothing so much as the obsession with ‘credibility’ you see among many American foreign policy hands in the modern day. The idea that once something had been committed to – the (largely only extant on paper) alliance with Nazi Germany, the creation of a collaborator government in China to ‘negotiate’ with, the occupation of southern Vietnam – then, even if you agreed it hadn’t worked out and had probably been a terrible decision to begin with, reversing course without some sort of face-saving agreement or concession on the other side would shatter any image of strength and invite everyone else the world over to grab at what you have. The same applies just as much to internal politics, where admitting that your branch couldn’t see a way to victory in the proposed war was seen as basically surrendering the viciously fought over budget, no matter the actual opinions of your experts – the book includes anecdotes about both fleet admirals and the senior field marshal China privately tearing their respective superiors in Tokyo a (polite) new one for the bellicosity they did not believe themselves capable of following through on, but of course none of these sentiments were ever shared with anyone who might use them against the army/navy.

The book is very much a narrative of the highest levels of government, idea of mass sentiment and popular opinion are only really incidentally addressed. Which does make it come as a shock every time it’s mentioned that a particular negotiation was carried out in secret because someone got spooked by an ultranationalist assassination attempt the day before. I entirely believe that no one wanted to say as much, but I can’t help but feel that people’s unwillingness to forthrightly oppose further war owed something to all the radical actors floating around in the junior ranks of the officer corps who more than willing to take ‘decisive, heroic action’ against anyone in government trying to stab the war effort in the back. Which is something that the ever-increasing number of war dead in China (with attendant patriotic unwillingness to let them die ‘for nothing) and the way everyone kept trying to rally the public to the war effort with ever-more militaristic public rhetoric assuredly only made worse.

That same rhetoric also played its part in destroying the possibility of negotiations with the United States. The story of those negotiations runs throughout the book, and is basically one misunderstanding and failure to communicate after another. It at times verges on comedy. Just complete failure to model the political situation and diplomatic logic of the other party, on both sides (combined with a great and increasing degree of wishful thinking that e.g. letting the military occupy southern French Indochina as a concession for their buy-in on further negotiations would be fine with the Americans. A belief held on exactly zero evidence whatsoever). The United States government was actually quite keen to avoid a war in the pacific if possible, as FDR did his best to get entangled in Europe and effectively start an undeclared naval war with Germany – but the negotiating stance hardened as Japan seemed more and more aggressive and unreliable, which coincided exactly with Japan’s government taking the possibility of war seriously enough to actually try to negotiate. It’s the same old story of offering concessions and understanding that might have been agreed to a few months beforehand, but were now totally unacceptable. In the end, everyone pinned their hopes on a face-to-face diplomatic summit with FDR in Juneau, where sweeping concessions could be agreed to and the government’s credibility staked on somewhere the hardliners could not physically interfere with. The Americans, meanwhile, wanted some solid framework for what the agreement would be before the summit occurred, and so it never did.

After the war, it was apparently the general sentiment that the whole nation was responsible for the war with the United States – which is to say that no individual person deserved any special or specific blame. Hotta’s stated aim with the book is to show how that’s bullshit, how war was entirely avoidable, and it was only do to these small cliques of specific, named individuals that it began. The hardliners like Osami Nagano, but just as much the cowards, careerists and factional partisans like Konoe, Tojo, and (keeper of the Privy Seal) Kido. Having read it I, at least, am convinced.

#book review #japan 1941 #eri hotta #history

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flaskoflethe · 10 months ago

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It's an... Experience. 4loko may have a meme status, but it's a seriously bad idea.

an extremely specific skillset that you don't have - *yet*

True--but I do NOT have steady hands. I used to do a couple shots of vodka before I had to do precision knife work just to steady them out. I've got a mild intermittent tremor that would make my pinstripes more of a pinwiggle.

I mean, I'll do it, but he's gotta buy me a drink or two before I take a swing at it.

#It's incredible people survive their 20's #These two statements aren't related in any way.#Just that's the best way to describe it?#It's interesting though #Kinda made me glad I have a wonky dopamine system #This goes for ADHD meds too #Seriously a bad idea to mix anything stimulating with alcohol really #Deep enough into tag - probably not super healthy to mix weed either #It's why I waited until my doctor advised me it was safe under reasonable circumstances (one or the other - never both at once)#And tbh if you need to stretch a prescription a few extra days edibles can keep the unmedicated thinking from hurting #(if you know you know - ADHD is a disorder for a lot of reasons on a spectrum etc. but excessive executive dysfunction is awful)#(sorry kinda got away from myself there. Don't mix drugs - especially uppers and downers)#Yes that means caffeine and alcohol together.

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overandundertarot · 1 year ago

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Message from your spirit guides.

Your spirit guides have a message for you; choose a pile to find out what it is!

Piles; 1-2(top row) 3-4(bottom row)

Pile 1; Page of wands reversed, 10 of wands, 7 of cups reversed.

You aren't being serious enough. You're too energetic right now and too playful, only chasing instant gratification. You are curretly procrastinating something because it feels too overwhelming and burdensome. Your spirit guides are telling you to get up off your butt and work towards making your dreams a reality. The things that will bring you actual results won't feel easy and simple. This has been going on for a while and it may feel exhausting but just keep pushing, you're almost there! They are really proud of you!

Pile 2; The moon reversed, 2 of swords reversed, 9 of swords.

Pile 2 you're experiencing a lot of mental confusion lately. You could be experiencing poor concentration, idleness, brainfog, anxiety and executive dysfunction. The fears, doubts and anxieties you have are stemming from something that is unclear to you. Your spirit guides are telling you that it's not all as it seems. You may be exacerbating your situation and allowing it to affect you to a degree that is more serious than the situation really is. A lot of this anxiety is because you're overthinking and overanalysing but you still haven't reached a point of clarity. You could be procrasting because you are a perfectionist and don't want to dissapoint yourself, but also not doing anyhting creates feelings of self loathing. Honestly, you need to take a break right now and then come back and look at the situation again; this time seeking the truth, and using that as a strating point for your thoughts and process.

Pile 3; The devil, Queen of wands, Queen of pentacles.

You are on top of everything right now pile 3. You are independent and thriving right now but there is something that's tempting you. It may feel a bit much sometimes but you love the chase. The temptation is a conflict of sorts, it may present like a challenge that you want to conquer because you have the confidence that you will come out on top; like a test of strength. Go for it and continue to believe in yourself! There may be some lesbians or bi women and femmmes in this pile. This is a very healing time for you; you are reaping the rewards of your labour. Your spirit guides hold you in very high regard and are very proud of who you are and your strength. You are very connected to your intuition and the spiritual realm,some of you have been feeling the call to look deeper into this side of yourself. You have a seductive aura, and your appearence may be very different from your personality; it may come as a shock to people. You could be looking to explore your sexual side, your guides are saying it's fine but remember to exercise your bodily autonomy. Don't do anything that doesn't feel 100% right. Also, this is a time of independence for you, a commited relationship is ill advised(specific message for someone regarding a masculine energy)

Pile 4; Ace of wands, 2 of wands, Queen of swords.

Pile 4 you are clinging to something that happened to you in the past. It may also be clinging on to you(It could be resurfacing right now). You've tried to move on but something always stopped you or you never found the strength. The trauma usually manifests for you as inaction/feling hollow/depression or lashing out at people as a defence mechanism. You're being advised to have a change of scenery, also to look into seeking support from the people around you. Your guides are saying that a chapter is ending for you, it was painful but it's time to shake off the sorrow and look towards a new future. Allow yourself to be hopeful. Specific message for someone is to get help from a doctor regarding their fertility issues.

That's it! Thanks for participating in this pick-a-card reading!!

*The images are not mine, I found them on pinterest!

#pick a card #tarot #divination #intuitive reading #pac #pick a picture #pick a pile #tarot pick a card #tarotblr #tarot community #tarot reading #tarot reader #free tarot #free readings #witchblr #witchcraft #witch community

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pyrrhiccomedy · 1 year ago

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what do you do when you're ADHD and know lots about your brain and how to Make Things Work For You but nonetheless the executive dysfunction persists! and you let all the important tasks build up because you don't want to do them and literally anything except 'the stuff i know i ought to do' is distracting/preferrable? like i KNOW what i need to do to break out of executive dysfunction but i... don't...? any insight on this? cheers mate

I mean dogg this is just not something you can think your way out of. parts of your brain are smooth where they shouldn't be smooth and other parts have holes in them that shouldn't have holes. you are not cranking out the chemicals you need to compensate for that. all the productivity tips in the world are not gonna change that. you need medication. I take three separate meds for my ADHD and it's changed my life. I still have ADHD, the meds don't make it so that I'm just like someone who doesn't have ADHD. But getting through the executive dysfunction is now like needing to shoulder through a stuck door, instead of, like, needing to break down a brick wall with my bare fists. I'd rather not, but it's doable, in a way that it just wasn't, before.

If for some reason medication is not available to you - and I'd really strongly recommend looking into that deeply before you do anything else, because basically all healthcare now covers these meds and most of them are very cheap - then the honest to god real answer for adults is to get some stimulants on your own. start with caffeine and like...go from there. I self-medicated with all kinds of fun additives before I finally figured out that the reason I felt more productive on amphetamines wasn't just because amphetamines are a great time.

if you are not of an age or background where you feel comfortable acquiring substances of questionable legality, uh. I don't know dude, take up knife juggling or something? adrenaline will get you there too.

my point is that if you already know everything there is to know, you know all the hacks and tricks and tips, and that's not cutting it, then you need to alter your brain chemistry. there's the easy, safe, cheap, medically advisable way of doing it, and then there's all the other ways of doing it. I'm not your mom or your pastor, so like, do what you've gotta do.

#adhd

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iskander-tm · 7 months ago

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Hello! 👋

I need your help. How do I know if i have the tism? Or ADHD. How did you know you were those things. I need to diagnose myself because my parents won't let me to the doctor and I am 14. I know I am not normal and I struggle a lot, you are one of my favorite artists on this app. And I look up to you a lot can I please get an advise? ✨ (I'm sorry for bad grammar English is not my first language)

Hi! English is not my first language too so no worries ahsghdas

I don't think I ever mentioned here anything about adhd or autism beside one stupid sandman post

I myself think that I have adhd, but not autism, and at the moment I can't get any professional help( even though I do need it the executive dysfunction kicks me in the ass) not evaluation

The only thing I can recommend is listen to other people with adhd/autism and compare their experience to yours. Funny story is that I once saw a youtube compilation "10th doctor being neurodivergent" and there was the section about pacing back and forth and I thought to myself "well that can't be a sign of neurodivergence, I do that, and I am not neurodivergent" and then it kicked lol

Well and also read articles about it and the criteria for it because before I read it I didn't know that a lot of things I personally do or have is actually a sign of adhd

That's all I can say now, have a nice day!

#text #adhd #autism #neuroscience

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theautisticdoctor · 5 months ago

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Entry #017

Planning and organisation

Living with autism can bring unique when it comes to planning and organization. For many on the ASD spectrum the structure is not just there to help, it's rather essential to us being able to function. Planning and organizing for me seems like it comes as a second nature to others, but for me it can be a true monster task. Not surprisingly, our brains process information differently, and this can make executive functioning, which is our ability to manage time, tasks, and decision-making, particularly tricky.

It is so difficult due to multiple factors, for example I suffer from sensory overload, executive dysfunction, hyper-attention to detail, memory issues and rigidity. Sensory overload makes it very difficult for me to focus on tasks when the environment is overwhelming, this can be the internal or the external environment. I need certain conditions to be able to focus or I will have trouble focusing or will be extremely quickly exhausted. Having hyperattention to detail can be a strength, it can also mean getting caught up in minor details and losing sight of the bigger picture. I can get caught up for hours fixing the borders of a document to one pixel, making it look perfect. Even though I get told that others won’t even notice it, I do, and it will get all my attention and give me anxiety if I don’t fix it. Keeping track of multiple tasks and deadlines can be difficult, I can think and ruminate about a certain task, but completely forget about another one. Even though I have nothing wrong with my memory, it’s partly because of the hyperattention to detail and knowing what is important and what is not. Knowing what is important and what isn’t, is part of the executive dysfunction.

Executive dysfunction is also managing time and tasks / goals, initiating and persevering tasks, flexibility in planning and multitasking. I have huge problems with time management, I honestly cannot estimate how long a task might take, because they most of the time are overestimated and on some tasks they are completely underestimated. Prioritising plans is also not my strong suit, I am keen to do the least important tasks first. Plus I am quite bad at initiating tasks and when I’m overwhelmed I have zero perseverance. Adjusting plans when something unexpected happens can throw me completely off, on a bad day it can throw me right into a breakdown.

I have developed certain strategies to manage my planning and organisation dysfunction. I’m not going to advertise that it fixes everything, because it’s always a work in progress kind of process and it’s different for everybody. But it all starts with self compassion, beating myself up for something my brain is just not wired to do isn’t going to help anyone. It’s okay if you are no planning guru. It’s okay if you can’t stick to your plan for a full week. Perfection isn't the goal here, you can’t live a perfect life and life is beautiful because of its imperfections. Celebrate the small successes. Because it’s amazing you pulled those small successes off. Applications are not my thing, I get overwhelmed by notifications and will be completely blindsided, they just don’t work for me. Maybe they do for you, then that’s great, but if you don’t see any progress or improvement after app #5, you can say it’s not for me and that’s okay. New apps that advertise with “get our premium subscription because we..”, I’d advise don’t and safe yourself from the disappointment. For me visual aids are a game-changer. Things like a whiteboard planner, wall-calendars, and bureau to-do lists can provide a visual representation of what needs to be done and when. They stay in your visual periphery and you will be reminded of it every time you walk by. Extra tools like color-coded schedules and charts can break tasks down tasks into smaller, more digestible pieces. Because breaking tasks into smaller steps can make them feel more achievable. Instead of writing "Clean the house," try breaking it down into "Vacuum the living room," "Dust the shelves," etc. This not only makes tasks seem less overwhelming but also gives a sense of accomplishment as each step is completed. Be aware that you don’t break them up too small, because then you might get overwhelmed by the task again. Also, you’re allowed to change your planning after you’ve started it, it’s not a fixed schedule.

Additionally, it could help to figure out what your natural routine is, because having a consistent routine can reduce anxiety and create a sense of order. Establishing daily habits can make the process of planning and organizing less daunting, reduce the cognitive load of decision-making and free up mental space for other tasks. Although, again, don’t put too much pressure on yourself here, it’s okay if you deviate from your routine. I’m also using timers to allocate specific periods for tasks can help with time management and help me remember specific tasks. It’s just a simple alarm that I also use to wake up, like a little nudge to remind me to cook dinner or start my bedtime routine. I also use The Pomodoro Technique, which involves working for a set period. Most of the time I use the formula 25 minutes work + 5 min rest and for each additional 5 minutes I take a minute longer rest and then taking a short break, this boosts my productivity. After four cycles I take a half hour break, or when I deviated from the 25 + 5 rest, I take the total work + rest as a break (so after four cycles of 35 + 7, I get 42 min rest).

Another thing that is really helpful, but I’m extremely bad at asking for is the support of others. It could be in the form of creating accountability, body doubling, literally helping with the task at hand, helping with creating order or helping with creating a planning. Figure out what your needs are, how you can find support from others, from who and dare to ask for help, support or advice. Most people are willing to help you. Also, connecting with others who understand can be incredibly supportive. Whether it's through support groups, online forums, or friends and family, sharing experiences and tips can provide both practical advice and emotional encouragement.

Remember, it's about finding what works best for you and taking it one step at a time. Everyone’s journey is different. What works for one person might not work for another, and that's okay. Patience and understanding, both from ourselves and those around us, are vital. It's important to celebrate the small victories and all progress, no matter how minor they may seem.

#actually autistic #autism #autism spectrum disorder #autistic #autistic adult #autistic community #autistic spectrum #being autistic #aspergers #aspergers syndrome #high functioning autism #high masking autism #unmasking autism #autistic unmasking #executive dysfunction

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hells-greatestdad · 10 days ago

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// home. Decompressing in a dark room with headphones and soothing music

I have a book on handling executive dysfunction that has a chapter on emotional dysregulation. May try and read a bit of that

Pic under cut is songs for mental health stuff. These tend to be more on the positive and uplifting side. Two of them are overtly religious, be advised. (The last two by Disciple.)

#ooc #delete later

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justforbooks · 1 month ago

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Character Limit by Kate Conger and Ryan Mac

Behind the scenes of a corporate acquisition that changed social media for ever

There was a time, just three or four years ago, when you could follow the news closely and not hear about Elon Musk for days – or even weeks. He was well on his way to becoming the world’s richest man, and was already a polarising figure, but he was a missable one. Those days are long gone.

Musk is now locked in a fierce public battle with the government and judicial system of Brazil, in the name of free speech, after he refused a court order to block several accounts that were accused of spreading hate speech and disinformation. He is a key figure in the US election race, having been lined up for a job finding savings in government spending should Donald Trump – who he has endorsed – win the presidency. Thanks to his Starlink satellites, he is a critical figure in the balance of power between Russia and Ukraine.

Musk is a powerful man because of his wealth and his control of strategic industries, including space launch and satellites. But he is inescapable because of the social network he took over and then transformed: Twitter.

Even people who never used Twitter more or less know its story over the last few years: Musk bought it, gave it a juvenile new name, X, and the whole thing seems to have been a complete mess that has made everyone miserable, including Musk himself.

That makes the job of New York Times reporters Kate Conger and Ryan Mac in their chronicle of the takeover and its resulting fallout, a difficult one: almost anyone who might actually read this book is pretty familiar with how things have played out. How can you make a story compelling when each step along the way has already been so heavily covered?

Conger and Mac’s answer to that is their astonishing ability to take the reader into almost every room that mattered during the contentious $44bn acquisition. The book opens with a Twitter data scientist getting ready to meet Musk, ostensibly in a bid to keep his job. The employee, however, has already decided he’s quitting and is instead using the opportunity to level with the new boss. The encounter goes predictably badly, leading him to accuse Musk of being one of the most gullible men on the planet. The book records Musk’s response as being two words long: “Fuck you.”

At other moments, the narration seems to know Musk’s exact movements when he was at home with his then-girlfriend Claire Elise Boucher (better known as the musician Grimes), or the conversations that take place on his plane. Such is the apparent omniscience that impressive accounts of goings-on in boardrooms and executive suites during the takeover seem par for the course.

Musk himself did not grant the authors an interview. Some of their insights come from court documents and other reporting, but there is no doubt that Conger and Mac enjoyed unmatched access to a range of characters from all sides. You couldn’t hope for a better ringside seat on the unfolding drama.

This closeup view is rarely flattering. Twitter’s co-founder, Jack Dorsey, comes across first as flighty and disengaged, then outright sulky as he is eased out as Twitter’s CEO – before himself joining Musk on the radical right. By the time we leave him, “his online posts were the kinds of things he would have had labelled or removed while he was Twitter’s CEO”. Musk’s authorised biographer, Walter Isaacson, seems to jump from observer to participant. Not only does he reportedly advise Elon Musk on the price point for his ill-fated plan to sell Twitter verification – the fabled “blue tick” – but apparently tells Musk to drop labels “for all media”.

Heroism, where it comes, centres on efforts to keep datacentres online, or to keep a moderation team in their jobs for another day or two to cover elections in the US and Brazil. Some characters are more sympathetic than others, but there are few good guys here – Character Limit is the story of a dysfunctional company becoming a shambolic one.

All of this makes for compelling reading, perhaps compelling enough to keep even people used to X’s 280-character-long posts engaged for a 430-page book, which is surely no small feat. Those who have followed the story obsessively will find plenty of nuggets to keep them interested if they can get past the somewhat stodgy first third of the book. Casual observers, who will probably have already had their fill from the endless news reporting on Musk’s antics, might find it harder going.

One of Conger and Mac’s challenges is that they are telling a story without an ending. X might go bust within the next year, or prove decisive in the 2024 presidential race. It could easily do both. In fact, the stately speed of book publishing means that Character Limit’s narrative has already been overtaken by events. As a retelling of exactly what happened and what it felt like to be there, it is a triumph. Anyone hoping for insights into what it all means, or what might happen next, will need to look elsewhere.

Musk’s companies have put more rockets into space this year than every government on the planet combined. He has businesses developing artificial intelligence, human-machine interfaces, self-driving vehicles, and more. A book with unprecedented access to his circle portrays him as a man with no impulse control, no plans, a desperate need for flattery and no ability to separate truth from fiction. If it leaves open the question of why he does what he does, and what he’ll do next, that may be because no one – least of all Musk – really knows.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

#just for books #Kate Conger #Ryan Mac #Character Limit #book review

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rapono-writes-stuff · 6 months ago

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In fear and wonderment

A discontinued Doom Slayer & Reader hurt/comfort fanfic where Doom Slayer rescues you. Another victim of writer's block/executive dysfunction (and also maybe embarrassment? vaguely recall that being an issue)

-----

It had been so long, too long since you had seen another human being. Scratch that, it had been too long since you had seen a <i>normal</i> human being, one that hadn’t been altered by the demonic presence.

(…)

That’s when you heard the distant sound of a shotgun. That piqued your interest, but (coupled with sound of demons dying)

Holy shit, that was the Doom Slayer.

Hit with a (word) of hope, you

(…)

“Doom Slayer!”

The moment he turned to look at you, you froze, the realization that this killing machine was giving you their full attention hit you. This was a mistake.

Your legs refused to move but still trembled, as with big slow steps, he walked over to you.

Holy shit, he was tall. Sure, he’d seemed pretty big and beefy from a distance, but now with him standing before you, you could really tell how huge he was, how easily he could crush your little body.

He tilted his head at you, expectant, waiting for you to give the reason why you wanted his attention.

“H…” The words caught in your throat, seized up in fear, but you had to push on, speak now or lose your only chance.

“Help me…” You whimpered, shaking like a leaf.

(…)

He stared down at your small form, his emotions hidden beneath his armour, as he seemed to be deciding. Your gut stirred with fear and anxiety. Would he hurt you? Would he care?

A blue light suddenly erupted from behind you, and you whipped around in fear. It, it looked like a portal. A mere coincidence? Or was the Slayer the reason it had shown up.

You turned back to look at the Slayer, and he pointed at it, before he turned back in the direction he had been headed, likely looking for more demons to kill.

You looked back at the portal. Where would it take you? It certianly couldn't be worse than the hell on earth. After all, the Slayer had told you to go through, and he had no ill intent, right?

You'd heard so many varying tales about him, you didn’t know what to believe. But he hadn’t hurt you yet, and he was killing the demons.

So with one more glance back in the Slayer's direction, his silhouette fading in the distance, you mustered up what little confidence you had left and took the plunge.

(.)

You winced as your eyes were met with bright artificial light, cool air licking at your skin, as you hit a metal floor. You took in several desperate breaths, your body suddenly hungry for the much cleaner air, as you tried to regain your bearings.

The structure didn’t quite look… human. Or of demon architect. It looked, well, alien.

“Hello earth survivor, welcome to the Fortress of Doom.”

Your head whipped up and around, looking for the source of the voice. There was no one, no signs of life anywhere.

“I am VEGA, the AI in charge of running this facility.”

AI? Oh, that explained why you didn’t see anyone. He sounded nice, warm, the most comforting thing you’d heard since the incident.

“I am surprised the Slayer found you. We had yet to find any survivors during his (word).”

“Oh��

(…)

“Vega?”

“What is it?”

“I'm… I’m scared.”

“Seeing as you just survived a very traumatic experience, this is to be expected.”

“…of the Slayer.”

Vega paused, the AI taking a notable moment to process this.

“The Slayer will not harm you.”

(…)

You scrambled behind a nearby pedestal as you heard the sound of a portal opening up.

“Welcome back Slayer, how are you feeling?”

You heard no response from him, but Vega still remain silent for awhile, as if the Doom Slayer was replying.

“Good. The human you found has been (fed/washed).”

(That piqued his interest)

You heard his loud footsteps nearing your hiding spot, your breath hitching as you tried to curl yourself into a tighter ball.

“I’d advise being more gentle in your approach, as they are afraid of you.”

The footsteps stopped, then started again, slowly, cautiously. You unfurled slightly as you looked up, only to be met with him, towering over you.

He was so big,(…)

He reached up and with a hiss and click, removed his helmet.

He was, undoubtibly, human. A strong jaw and masculine features, thick eyebrows and short-cut hair. Scars riddled his skin, most old, proof of many battles won, but not won unscathed.

And there was a rage, burning in his eyes, one that seemed unyielding and undying, that made you quake under its gaze. But as your eyes met, you could see that flame subsiding, dying down. You were not the target of that fury, and thusly the fire went out, replaced with oddly calm look.

(Eyes and strip his armour)

Even without his armour, his hands were massive, as he reached down towards you. You shifted away slightly on instinct, but otherwise let him approach you, as he crouched down and patted your head. His hand engulfed it, but he was gentle, as he ruffled your hair slightly with his comforting pets.

It had been so long, so so long since someone had touched you like this, held you tenderly, too long since you'd had contact with another human being. So you leaned into his hand, relaxing under his touch,

(…)

Huge arms wrapped around your small form, and for a moment, you began to panic, realizing how utterly trapped you were. But he simply pulled you in closer, into his chest, into a hug.

And with that, the fear was gone. You wrapped your own arms around him the best you could, and sobbed into his shirt.

#scrapped content #doom #doom eternal #edit: yeah I definitely never finished this cuz my brain combusted out of embarrassment #like I have to keep taking breaks while rereading this because it is TOO MUCH for my ass handle #(also not the 'this is bad' embarrassment but the blushing type)

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