#except theyre at the age where it's their last year before they have to stop going to it cause they're too old for it and im just like

[zipstick]

when you want to learn how to act but the drama a level is only designed to teach you how to pass the exam

[anonbinaryweirdo]

i think that one of my all time favorite OCS might be my dangan oc; Kristabelle Nakanishi

I've been roleplaying for like years now, but we first got into Danganronpa roleplays in like 2021-2022, but it was before I knew anything about it fr (fun facto; Oliver enters fandoms without knowing anything about said fandom, that way they're more like to get more into it by reading into the lore as time progresses)

I'm pretty sure the story was changed around a bit, because we soon started a childhood server, which is where we roleplayed our ocs/characters stories and developed the lore

Kristabelle was traumatized obviously like she's my OC she does NOT get a pass tf

ahe had a younger twin sister, and an older brother, who "died" in that same server, and she also had a girlfriend, who she ran away from because of something she was forced to do

her and her siblings were like test dummies for their father (Oliver stop projecting your daddy issues onto all of your ocNO.) BUT they were also raised assassins at a young age, this adding onto the trauma and abuse for obvious reasons

there was this orphanage that all the kids would go to to hang out, and that's where she met kokichi (and his twin sister, played by the same person), who ended up being her best friend and bonded through the trauma !

there was stitch, mia, sparks, mazuko, charlie/ollie, and kristabelle, as the og original character cast

eventually some bad things happened, and everyone separated, and kristabelle ran away, but not before getting to spend some last times with kokichi, who gave her a matching hairpin to remember each other by

now, this wasn't canon at first, but I had went offline for a bit and came back to the server (killing game) spamming me, like, "KRISTABELLE AND TOGAMI MAKE THEM FOUND FAMILY"

I was like lol why

"they're both rich, they both drink tea, they're both tall and sassy, I'd let them step on me (<-mia), they have a lot in common, theyre both kinda antags, they would be unsTOppable, MAKE THEM FOUND FAMILY." OKAY DAMN

so I did !

obviously they weren't fond of each other at first, but eventually they actually did become like an amazing fucking duo

again this was an alternate universe with a somewhat changed story, not everything will be entirely lore accurate <//3

they both fucked up trials, and almost found themselves being executed because of misunderstandings, took no one's shit fr

i think we merged killing games in this ⁉️ because we didn't wanna do separate ones for every game + we didn't want to necessarily have us in every game, so we put all three together, and oh my god it was so chaotic in the best way, everything was harder and much more hilarious but like traumatizing too

everyone obviously had like amnesia, except for stitch and Junko, who were the main masterminds ⁉️ so kokichi and kristabelle didn't even recognize each other, sadly

when they were kids they were inseparable

THE EXECUTIONS

stitch always came up with the executions for our OCS and they were so creative

I was heartbroken once because someone else's oc died and I liked them like NO⁉️

Oliver is getting off track, but like she's one of my best OCS I think personally, not counting my genshin OCS because then, Kristabelle would NOT be my favorite.

I wrote out

like

four? or three things for her, little snippets of her past and how traumatizing it was

I wrote out a full on death scene I was surprised with myself reading back on it

[fanficmustread]

Ive seen so many arguments for the shipping things in poppys playtime. I kinda get where all of you are coming from, but let me lay down some facts that we know from chapter 1,2, 3 and all the lore we've as a whole collected. So yes toys were made but the people in them didnt technically die, lived bc poppys typically contain opium, and then their memories were mostly wiped as they were immortalized as toys. Their organs? Intact and growing, as well as bones as we can clearly see with catnap. Not to mention we know they lived because if they died it would be a failed experiment. We see this when dead mice dont live in a failed experiment before. (Or at least from what i can remember i will probably go on a deep dive soon to find all of the lore once more.) The death dates are so the playtime co doesnt get idk sued or something. Better to say "We couldn't save him/her/them 🥺👉👈" then to say "We turned this kid from a kid to A CAT TOY!! 😎😎😎" 😭😭😭 Things we dont know are if their brains develop more as time goes by, personally i think they do because they went insane. (Dont stop reading here it gets better) Thats also why they can eat, and they need protein to grow probably, which is why i think catnap is also the way he is and dogday and poppy didnt get much, if any, substance. Now what we really should be thinking of isnt what age are they so we can ship them but more is it morally okay to ship the monsters?

Personally no, no its not. I agree that theyre 10 years older sure but i dont think they have the mental processing for a deep romantic relationship. Im not trying to be rude but they were stuck in a factory underground for practically their whole lifes. I just want them to be free and happy or to die peacefully because they obviously didnt get either no matter how you read the games. Not to mention the lack of health lessons for any of those things. Heck the lack of any real teachings and all, they dont know how to mow a lawn. Or how to fly a kite, these guys never experienced a soda called a surge yet they lived in that sodas life time. Stop judging people for what they do but like also think about what you're shipping and how you can make stuff not problematic. Also if you're looking for a human au i made one on my art account @artmustdraw anyones welcome to use it like a base for most any ship with the critters. Or even a base for their own au idc just give me a like and reblog if you use it at all lol. (Kissy and huggy are already married it it and i havent decided on what im doing with Mommy longlegs yet)

One last thing, the cartoon versions of the critters arent the monster versions. Think about it like this, the bigger bodies toys didnt have any part of making the cartoon except maybe inspiring it to be made and maybe watched some of the episodes. If the experiments were done pre cartoon. In the cartoon its safe to assume that theyre all adults due to having their own houses with no parents in sight. Rather then like an orphanage where a bunch of scientists are looking at you like youre a prime rib. (Do yall get my point? I hope so anyway thats the end of my rant lol)

[xumoonhao]

what in the goddamn are u talking abt. honestly im struggling with where to start with what u said bc theres so much bullshit here its almost unbelievable. like oh my god...

first off: nowhere here did i say or even imply that 'all men are predators' and you know damn well thats not what i meant, either. blanket statement, just to be crystal fucking clear since you like to make leaps of judgement: i dont think all men are predators. ive never thought that and i will never think that. end point. this ties into your last paragraph so i simply will NOT mention it again as 1) its not the main focus of this post and 2) you have no business assuming i would think that, especially because i never fucking said it. what i was trying to get across (and i did, seeing as most people understood this post Perfectly fine) is that adult men fans of newjeans are, with almost 100% certainty, not looking at this group of extremely young girls with pure intentions. there isnt a way for a man who is 20+ years older than a literal child to look at them dressed provocatively, singing inappropriate lyrics with questionable dance moves in a way that is healthy; why cant they be interested in one of the many other girl groups that are around? one of older women? of adults? because thats not what men fans of groups like newjeans wants. there are plenty of men out there who listen to girl groups; its not creepy. what IS creepy is the way men will look at groups like newjeans; there is a difference between a man listening to an older group like girls generation and liking the music, and a man obsessing over a group of 15-19 year old girls. if you cant understand that difference, then im sorry but i cant help you.

second point, and this has a lot of personal opinion on it so i understand a difference of thought: newjeans music is both 1) cookie cutter pop music you could hear from any group out there, especially with the rise of y2k being a sound many groups are incorporating, and 2) not very good at all. do the girls have talent? yes, of course they do; i never said they didnt. however, they arent unique to the genre at all, except, of course for their very young age. (and before you say 'there have been young idols before' i know that. im completely aware of it; ive ebeen a fan of kpop since 2009 and have seen the rise and fall of many groups. whats different in recent years is the uber-sexualization of groups. again, i know groups have always been sexualized, but with the rise of very young idols debuting and the sexualization of them continuing, it is worse for minors to debut now more than ever. stop purposefully misinterpreting my words to further your own opinions. next time, make your own fucking post.) now, just to hearken back to my previous point; you dont know me. i know very well what older girl groups went through with their fans; i was around for much of it in the earlier days, and saw just how sick some fandoms got. the issue with newjeans is the 'buffer' fans i spoke about are not trying to protect this group. while they may not be actively being gross or inappropriate, there is still something strange about adults being a fan of such young girls, when a main focus of their career so far has been so sexualized. the only fans who are (mostly) immune to this are people the girls age, as they themselves probably dont realize how harmful everything is. but adults understand; we get it, and we see whats going on. thats why we have an issue. because the only people who are letting newjeans have a career are those either blind to the danger because theyre too young to understand, or those putting them in danger because they know they can make a profit off of it, because, as ive already stated, there are grown men (and some women, im sure) who are looking at these girls with predatory eyes. and thats where all the profit lies.

now, im not sure what you mean by this: 'I'm not sure what OPs cause is, and I do wonder about their own claimed fandom(s) bc some of this sounds off.' but my cause is speaking out about a group that simply shouldnt be around. none of the girls should be there; they are too young to be in an industry like kpop. end of discussion there.

to end this off, what you said here: 'And says that OP is incapable of liking a group they don't want to have sex with.' is not only completely and wholly wrong, but also incredibly disgusting. if you think that is a normal thing to say to someone that you dont fucking know is incredibly telling of the kind of person you are. you have no right to say that to me, nor any reason. was i maybe a little generalizing by saying the only reason fans like newjeans is because theyre young? sure; im sure there are a scant few fans who innocently like this group and enjoy their music, listening to it and following along normally. however, they are not who is being pandered to; the perverted adults are.

do Not reply to this with nonsense again. if you purposefully take what ive said the wrong way, thats your own fault. not mine. fucking hell

there really are So Many horrible things about newjeans, but the worst thing about their group really is that they really arent about the music. they will Never be about the music. its not as if the girls are once in a generation vocalists, or that their music is incredible and breaking new ground on what pop music can be, or that theyre empowering a younger generation but here's the thing about that; even in the hypothetical world that all those things WERE true i would still think that the group should not exist. the kpop industry - like EVERY music industry on the planet - is exploitative. there are no two ways around it, and while it is a bad enough environment for adults to be, it is Disgusting for children to be in, but ESPECIALLY children who are in a group that was solely made to pander towards and older audience; i.e., adults. their music is not for people their age; it just isnt. all groups have their target audience; newjeans target audience is, without a doubt, adults, and more specifically adult men. that would be a problem for any group of young women, but the fact that they are so young just makes it so much worse. and its not the girls fault; of course its not. its the fault of the people who debuted them; who write their music; who make their styling decisions; who choreograph their dances; who at no fucking point have a single one of these girls best-interest at heart. all they care about is exploiting these very young girls to make a profit and to create a fanbase that has absolutely no qualms about their age; to the fans who have supported newjeans since the beginning, their age is the sole reason to like them. its sickening and it should not be happening but it will continue to bc the people who support them will always be louder than the people criticizing them bc theyre buffered by people who, while they might not follow newjeans, dont see their group as big of a problem as they should. for some reason, when groups like this exist, there are not only outright supporters, but people playing devils advocate and saying 'hey, why SHOULDNT they be a group? theres nothing explicitly wrong with them!' even though there is. there are MULTIPLE things wrong with newjeans as a kpop group. those girls should be nowhere near that industry, and yet theyre in the middle of it. only one member is old enough to be out of highschool; some are barely old enough to be IN high school. thats a fucking problem, and i dont know why some people have such a hard time seeing that.

[little-orphan-ant]

!! !! !! <3

HI ILYSM <3 <3

this got Long so uh

you are being gifted my son, Henry Peter Alexander Wiley IV

he was born on March 13, 1843, to a prominent lawyer and his wife

the Wileys are RICH - they have a New York City house where they usually stayed called Wiley Manor, as well as homes in London, Virginia, and a small "cabin" (mansion) in southern France

before meeting the other character in my story, Jamie, he goes by Four (because he's the fourth of his name) or Harry

Four has 3 older sisters and is the first son and heir to his father's sizable fortune

he meets Jamie (Edward James Gray) when they're both 7 and they immediately become friends

Jamie gives him the nickname of Hal!! and theyre best friends!! and oh my god i love them so fucking much!!

(J wasnt born rich, his father struck gold in the Gold Rush and only now are the Grays being introduced to high society)

at 11, Hal begins attending a boarding school in Massachusetts, but he only lasts about a year before having a nervous breakdown. he's autistic and has social anxiety (wow ant whered you get that from huh) and was bullied a bunch and it got to be too much for our poor boy

for the next few years he has several private tutors and does a Lot of reading (boy loves to read)

his father pressures him to Go to School and Be Normal and Stop Letting Down the Family which only makes Hal's anxiety worse fuck his dad >:(

at 16 he realizes OH SHIT IM IN LOVE WITH JAMIE

it takes him a few months to tell him but once he does they start courting and it's v cute <3 <3 <3

then of course Hal's dad decides to send him to a school in South Carolina where his cousin Josiah goes and this time Hal can't come up with good enough arguments and has to go

he's at boarding school until age 18, and while there he and Jamie write a bunch of really romantic sappy letters

Hal's home for christmas break in 1861 when the Civil War breaks out, but it doesn't really impact him all too much, except that his father decides it's too risky for him to go back to school because SC is now part of the confederacy

while at school Hal started getting symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and now it's getting worse, so he spends a lot of the next couple months in bed recovering

by fall he's feeling better and he and Jamie can go be their gay selves

BUT THEN in October Hal is engaged (without his permission to the daughter of his father's friend, Miss Hattie Parker

Hal doesnt tell Jamie immediately but J finds out about it anyways and gets angry bc his boyfriend didnt. tell him abt being engaged

around that same time J's father discovers a letter between him and Hal (it has J's name on it but not Hal's, so Mr Asshole doesnt know it's him) and threatens to kill and/or disinherit him

for some unknown reason J decides that the only way to prevent this is to enlist in the war so he goes in down that

fuck this is getting long im gonna finish the rest in @mattwife-mattnipulate-mattsplain's ask

but thank you so much pol ily /p

[nicknellie]

Anonymous requested: “tricked into 7 minutes in heaven at a party” AU with willex, where theyre close friends and apart of the same friend group, and their friends know they both like each other and are tired of watching them dance around each other so they devise a plan to have a party and play seven minutes in heaven, and get them to be alone together in a closet or room or something. so a sort of getting together/modern AU with some kissing cause the boys deserve it?

I had to Google what 7 Minutes In Heaven is. Anyway!! I love this prompt so much, it’s so so sweet. We love some getting together fluff. Thank you so much for suggesting it!

Title from Alone by Heart.

The Secret Is Still My Own

Alex could have kicked himself for not realising what this was much earlier. It was probably Luke’s idea. Maybe Julie’s – she could be sneaky when she wanted to be. It didn’t really matter who had devised the plan, all that Alex was worried about now was the fact that he was about to spend seven minutes locked in a small room with Willie and the likelihood was that it was going to be utterly dreadful.

A few months ago when Alex and Willie had first met, it wouldn’t have been so awful. Their friendship had been fresh and exciting and there had been an easy banter flowing between the two of them that made Alex feel light and giddy. He had been glad to spend time with Willie then, looking for every excuse to hang out with him because who wouldn’t? Willie was funny, kind, intelligent, and everything good in the world. Alex would have been mad to not want to spend time with him. It didn’t take long for Alex to realise he was falling for Willie, quickly and with no signs of stopping.

And he made the grave mistake of telling that to Luke.

“Dude,” Luke had said, grabbing Alex’s shoulders. “You gotta ask him out!”

“What? No!” Alex had protested. He tried to wriggle free but Luke’s grip was like iron and he gave up after a moment or two. “I don’t want to. I like being friends with him.”

“Yeah, but imagine if you were more than friends,” Luke pressed, grinning wildly. “It’s not like he’d say no – he’s head over heels for you, man.”

“He is?”

“I think so.”

“That’s not proof,” Alex deadpanned. “You also thought that if you ate watermelon seeds one would grow inside you. Then you cried when Reggie ate them.”

“That was ages ago!” Luke whined.

“It was last week, but alright.”

“Alright, fine, I’m a bad example,” Luke admitted. “But what if I told you that Julie thinks Willie likes you?”

Alex considered it for a moment. Julie was definitely more reliable than Luke, and where Luke was almost definitely guessing about whether or not Willie had feelings for Alex, Julie had probably spoken to Willie herself to find out. So he shrugged and gave Luke a short nod.

“Does she think so?” he asked, trying to keep the hope out of his voice.

“Dude,” Luke scoffed. “She was the one to point it out to me. You and Willie are made for each other, bro! Ask him out or I’ll have to do it for you.”

Alex hadn’t asked Willie out. It hadn’t been because he didn’t want to or because he didn’t think Luke and Julie were right – it was because he simply didn’t know how. How was he supposed to go up to Willie, a literal angel, and ask him on a date without spontaneously combusting? He didn’t want to make a fool of himself, not in front of Willie.

He had thought that Luke was joking about getting Alex and Willie together himself. That had, of course, been an incredibly naïve thing to believe. When Luke said he’d do something, he meant it – Alex should have learnt that from the time Luke had said he would lick an electric fence and then followed through immediately and without hesitation. So really he shouldn’t have been surprised when Luke made it his mission to get Alex and Willie together.

The first time it had happened was when Alex and Willie were hanging out alone in the studio. They had been talking, just catching up with each other, and it had been nice. Willie had been halfway through a story about one of the kids at the nursery he worked part-time at when all of a sudden the lights in the studio had dimmed and slow, romantic music had begun drifting from the stereo in the corner.

Willie had looked utterly bemused, a quiet half-smile gracing his features. “What’s all this?”

“I don’t know,” Alex told him, standing up and flicking the lights back on, then going to the stereo and turning the music down all the way. “Sorry about that. It’s never happened before.”

“You mean you didn’t set it up?” Willie asked.

“No,” Alex replied, looking around the studio. Unsurprisingly, he had spotted Luke in the attic, hidden amongst the beanbags, the stereo’s remote in his hands. He didn’t even have the good grace to look guilty, instead giving Alex a cheery wave.

“Oh,” Willie had said. His tone made Alex turn to face him – there was something in it he couldn’t quite put a name to. “Okay. Anyway, so, as I was saying…”

Luke’s plans had not improved from then on. He had pulled the classic “invite both of them to hang out but don’t show up so they’re just spending time together one-on-one”, he had dedicated an entire setlist to Willie at their most recent gig and told the entire crowd that it had been Alex’s idea, and every time Alex and Willie had a conversation he would find a way to muscle in and very unsubtly suggest they go on a date.

It was making Alex’s life a misery.

Because now every time he saw Willie felt painstakingly awkward. The both of them were just waiting for Luke to show up and do whatever he’d planned, after which they’d be steeped in brittle, tense silence until one of them found an excuse to back out of the situation. The ease and light-heartedness their friendship had once been built on was pretty much shot to pieces. Alex knew that Luke meant well, but he was almost certain that he had ruined everything.

It didn’t help that Luke had got Julie, Reggie, and Flynn in on it too, though they were much less heavy-handed than he was when it came to getting them together. Reggie’s main tactic was ask if they’d been on a date yet every time he saw them but leave it alone once they said no, while Julie and Flynn tended to talk to Alex away from Willie and try and convince him that they were, in Flynn’s words, a match made in heaven.

“He totally wants you to ask him out,” Flynn gushed on one of these occasions. “Did you see the way he was looking at you earlier? He’s in love.”

“Things are awkward enough between us as it is,” Alex had explained. “I’m not going to make it worse by asking him out.”

“Well, maybe you don’t need to ask him on a date,” Julie suggested, ever the voice of reason. Alex inwardly thanked her – at least somebody was on his side. “But I do think you need to at least talk about what’s going on between you.”

He revoked his inward thank-you.

“We don’t need to talk,” Alex insisted. “If we just leave it alone then the problem will eventually go away.”

“That’s always your solution,” Julie said.

“And it never works,” Flynn added.

“If you just face your feelings head-on and actually try communicating with him you might get somewhere,” Julie said. Alex looked at her and knew she was telling the truth – her eyes were wide and kind, her mouth set into a gentle smile, and she looked as if she wanted nothing more than to help Alex. “You’ve been dancing around each other for so long, all you need to do is figure out where you both are. Trust me.”

He had shrugged inelegantly and let Flynn change the direction of the conversation, grateful to be talking about something else.

But he hadn’t taken Julie’s advice. Talking to Willie was difficult. Their banter was all but gone and their conversations lasted no more than a few minutes at most. It was a lot easier when they were with all their friends, in a big group where they could talk to others, which had been exactly the reason that Alex wasn’t worried about the impromptu party Julie had invited everyone to that night.

And look where it had got him.

It had been Luke who suggested it during a lull in conversation.

“Why don’t we play Seven Minutes in Heaven?”

The suggestion had been met with excited ‘ooooh’s from most of the group sat around the studio, all except Alex. The last time he’d played Seven Minutes in Heaven had been in middle school – he had been locked in a closet with a girl in his class, she had kissed him incredibly awkwardly, he had blurted “I’m too gay for this” and fallen ungracefully out of the closet with six minutes still left on the clock. While that had been years and years ago, the memory still burned with embarrassment.

“Count me out,” he said. “That game is cursed.”

“I think you’re thinking of Bloody Mary in the Mirror,” Reggie supplied. “That game is cursed. This one’s just a bit of fun.”

“Absolutely not,” Alex said, shaking his head. “You guys can play, I’m staying out of it.”

“Oh, come on, Alex,” whined Luke, “everyone has to play! Otherwise it’s no fun.”

“You might not even get picked,” Julie said helpfully.

“But also you might,” Luke added.

Alex looked around the room at his friends – Reggie was smiling encouragingly, Luke looked put-out that Alex had even thought about refusing, Julie and Flynn were looking at him with hope and excitement in their eyes that he really didn’t want to crush, and Willie… Willie was avoiding eye contact altogether.

He didn’t know what it was that did it, but finally he relented. “I’ll play.”

Luke punched the air triumphantly and began entering everyone’s names into a generator he’d brought up on his phone. Alex watched with bated breath as the little wheel spun, slowing down until it landed on a name. The screen lit up with an over-the-top fireworks animation and the name ‘WILLIE’ in garish bubble writing.

Alex didn’t look at Willie, but he did feel his own insides squirm. What if he was picked next? He wasn’t sure he could last seven minutes alone with Willie. What was he supposed to talk about? What was he supposed to do? How was he meant to act like it wasn’t the most awkward thing he’d ever done especially after everything that had happened in the past few months?

Luke set the spinner off again and Alex watched nervously as it ticked through all the names. The firework animation lit up the screen again and when it was cleared the name ‘ALEX’ was left behind, glowing in all its bubble writing glory.

He tried not to sigh in defeat and he stayed put, no matter how much he wanted to leg it from the room and never come back.

“Alright then!” Julie said, clapping her hands and beaming. “Alex and Willie! You guys feeling up for this?”

Alex didn’t have an answer, but it appeared that Willie did. He stood up and offered a hand to pull Alex to his feet too, smiling gently.

“I’m ready,” he said, though Alex didn’t miss the waver in his voice. “How about you, hotdog?”

He could feel his friends’ eyes boring into him like lasers, but kept his own eyes trained on Willie, searching his expression with no idea what he was actually searching for. Eventually though, he gave a resolute nod and said, “Yeah. Yeah, I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

“You can go into the bathroom,” Julie said, pointing towards the little room at the back of the studio. “You’ll have to lock the door yourselves.”

Alex nodded and mutely followed Willie into the bathroom. He shut and locked the door behind them, then flicked the light-switch on. Immediately, Willie flicked it back off.

“Why can’t we have the lights on?” he asked. “I can’t see you.”

“Those are the rules, hotdog,” Willie returned. His voice sounded like it was coming from the opposite side of the room, but Alex couldn’t be sure. After all, he couldn’t see anything.

He could feel his heart hammering in his chest and sweat starting to bead on his forehead as he slid himself down the wall to sit on the floor. He had no reason to feel so nervous right then; he’d been alone with Willie a thousand times, this didn’t have to be any different just because it was in a small dark room and they had a time limit ticking over their heads. Admittedly, he hadn’t been alone with Willie all that often recently, but he shouldn’t have been too out of practise.

“So,” he ventured, rubbing his hands along his legs, hoping the repetitive movements would dull his nerves. “What do you want to talk about?”

Willie was silent for a moment and Alex was sure that he’d somehow already put a foot wrong. Briefly, he considered unlocking the door and trying to leave very quietly so that Willie wouldn’t notice, but he realised quickly that plan wouldn’t work because he would never get past his friends in the studio. All he could do was stick it out for six and a half more minutes.

But mercifully, Willie finally spoke.

“Things have been weird recently, huh, hotdog?”

It teased a laugh from Alex, if only a small one. Because yes. Yes, things had been incredibly weird and he hated it.

“Yeah,” he agreed, “it’s been weird. I’m sorry about Luke and the others.”

“You don’t need to apologise,” Willie said. Alex could hear the smile in his voice and found himself relaxing. “It doesn’t really bother me. But… I mean, it seemed like it was bothering you. I’ve been trying to give you a little space but I don’t know if that’s what you want.”

“No,” Alex said, far too quickly. He tried to rein himself in a little, not wanting things to descend back into that dangerous awkward territory. “No, I don’t want you to give me space. I really like hanging out with you, Willie. I don’t want to stop that. I just wish they’d stop teasing.”

There was another pause, smaller this time, barely perceptible.

“Why?” Willie asked quietly.

“Because,” Alex began, but he quickly found himself lost for words.

How was he supposed to explain it to Willie when he found it hard to explain it to himself? He didn’t like their teasing because he was scared. He didn’t like their teasing because he didn’t want to make Willie uncomfortable. He didn’t like their teasing because this thing, whatever it was, between him and Willie was theirs and only theirs and he wanted to keep it between that way. Because he wanted to make these decisions on his terms, not when his friends decided he should.

“Because?” Willie prompted.

Alex swallowed his pride and his nerves and made himself speak.

“Because I really like you, Willie. And when our friends try and find ways to get us together it just feels awful because I want to do it myself. I don’t want them to intervene or mess this up. I want to do it my way. They keep saying that you like me too – is that true?”

Silence again. Alex could hardly stand it.

“Yeah,” Willie said finally. With that single word Alex felt like he could breathe more easily than ever before. “I do. Like you, I mean. And I get it. I’m sorry this whole thing has been such a mess.”

Alex huffed a laugh. “Blame Luke.”

“Oh, I will,” Willie replied through a chuckle.

Alex heard him shuffle across the bathroom floor and felt their sides press together as Willie came to sit next to him. Without thinking he laid his head down on Willie’s shoulder, then felt Willie rest his head on his in return.

“So,” Alex said again. “What does this mean for us?”

“What do you want it to mean?” Willie asked teasingly, the smile on his face evident in his voice.

“Are we dating?” he asked. He could feel his own smile tugging at his lips as Willie slipped an arm around his shoulders.

He felt Willie press a gentle kiss to the top of his head. “Yes, Alex. We’re dating.”

Maybe it was the late hour, maybe it was the dark room, maybe it was the rush of adrenaline he got from hearing Willie day the words “we’re dating”, but something gave him a warm and welcome rush of courage and he said, before he could think better of it, “Can I kiss you?”

“Well,” Willie said, “I think that’s what usually happens in this game.”

“I don’t want to kiss you because of the game,” Alex told him. He knew Willie was probably joking, but he wanted to be certain. He wanted to make it clear that none of this was because of the game (mainly because Luke had probably rigged it somehow and Alex still wanted to do this his own way). He needed to show that this was for Willie and for himself, nothing else.

“I know,” Willie said gently. “I don’t either. I just want to kiss you.”

Alex slid a hand up to cup Willie’s jaw and they slowly came together. Willie’s lips were softer than Alex thought should be allowed, the kiss gentle and slow. It felt perfect, like fireworks had been lit in Alex’s soul (though much better fireworks than the terrible animation on Luke’s random selector wheel). He felt Willie’s fingers knot through his hair and pull them closer together.

It hadn’t gone the way Alex would have really liked. He didn’t get to ask Willie out on his terms. But from now on, with Willie as his boyfriend, they could do everything else on their terms. They could go at their own speed, hand-in-hand, with no ticking time limit set by their friends. They could move at their own pace with nobody but each other.

And Alex could breathe easy.

*

Taglist (if you want to be added or removed just let me know): @ace-bookworm @williexmercer @willex-owns-my-heart @itstiger720 @the-reckless-and-the-brave @that-one-newsie @bluedarkness @lookingthroughmirrors @teammightypen @salty-star @julieandthequeers @lmaohuh @sunnysbright 

[klaus-is-the-real-number-1]

The day we caught the train (Slytherin!Five x Hufflepuff!Reader)

 missvifdor said:  It would be for Five Slytherins with a Hufflepuff reader 🤗 they are very opposite in personality but they complement each other. I love Harry Potter and the umbrella academy, so i'm glad you write about both 😄 thank you,

A/N: this was like kinda vauge so i made up like a story line i guess?? Its kinda a mess and really long?? hope this is ok!! I really like these because i used to be obsessed with HP, in this i imagine Five would be from the really posh part of london where, the reader being opposites to him would be from a northern town and theyre both in sixth year which is age 16-17, i had to do so much research for this lol

Words: 2711

Footsteps echoed through the long empty halls as curfew rolled around, the sounds of students rushing to get back to their dormitories after a long night of studying and hushed whispering of passwords was not an unfamiliar sound at this time of night. Pictures were left empty as their residents wandered away out of frame and the castle slowly went to sleep, except for the prefects. As the sun went down, the prefects got up to do nightly patrols to make sure no students were up past curfew, each house prefect patrolled their own areas around their relative commonrooms to catch any wrong doers, not that they were many.

Tonight was your turn, patrolling the basement level and the kitchen corridor around the Hufflepuff dorm room, waiting for anything exciting to happen yet you knew it never would. Hufflepuffs always had a strong moral code and a clear right from wrong, every single patrol you carried out during Fifth year when you were appointed prefect you never caught a single person, now part way into sixth year still not once incident had occurred.

Yet, for some reason, every patrol you had ended up with a certain Slytherin prefect following you around, Five. Five was unusual to say the least, he was a well respected and slightly feared student, cunning and determined, he had a close knit clique of fellow pure blood slytherins, yet for some reason out of everyone in the whole of the castle, he had a soft spot for you. Even though he’d never show it in front of others, during the light of the day he’d sneak in side glances and small smiles, especially in the first few years making sure no comments came your way about your muggle parents or your upbringing.

Exactly on queue, a familiar sound of footsteps echoed down the staircase leading to you corridor only to stop short at the last step. A small ‘lumos’ echoed throughout the quiet hallway before Fives head pops into view, checking it was actually you there before a large smile breaking on his face as he walked into view. “Hey.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be on patrol?” You smile to him as he got closer, crossing your arms over your chest.

“They know it’s me on, no one would dare try anything.” He smirks knowing he was right, striking fear into everybody, except you. His eyes soften and his tone became gentle when he was speaking with you. He’d always been like that, from your first journey on the Hogwarts express, talking the entire train journey up, secret library meeting when you both realised things weren’t as simple as just being friends. Things got difficult when blood ‘purity’ came into play, when suddenly you couldn’t be friends, which hurt.

The dimly lit hallways excentrated his features, his sharp jaw and high cheekbones cast shadows on his face and neck, yet his dimples still shone through when he smiles and breaks up the harsh exterior that he puts on. Stepping closer, you lifted your hand to run it through his hair, watching his face break out into a smile and wrap his hand around your waist. Small displays of affection weren’t uncommon between the two of you, only increasing through the years of being at Hogwarts. “I’m so glad you stopped gelling your hair back.”

“Don’t remind me.” He rolled his eyes, remembering his poor style choices of his past. You move your hand and run it down the side of his face and across his jaw, taking a second to admire him before dropping your hand.

“I’ve gotta go, my shifts nearly over.” A sad looking smile broke over his face as he slowly lowered his hand from your waist. “I’ll see you tomorrow though.” You say as you lock eyes with him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He repeated back to you. He smiled and started walking towards the stairs, just before his foot touched the first step he turned back to you. “Goodnight, y/n.”

Dueling was always one of the most exciting parts of Hogwarts, it was a welcome break from the immense workload that sixth years had to deal with. In sixth year you were expected to be able to cast non-verbal spells, a mentally challenging task where some were better than others. Over the past month your defence class had been working tirelessly on being able to cast successful non-verbal spells with the promise of having a period where you would be duelling, which was exciting for everyone involved, a chance to show your abilities and represent your house.

“I’m going to be pairing you up today,” Your teacher spoke to you all as he was stood on the dueling table, met with a grumble from the students. “With student of the same ability.” He continued, seemingly unaffected by the disappointed sounds of the sixth years. “When I call you out, both of you will come to the stage.”

Cheers and boo’s echoes throughout the room as students from different houses duled, light flying from wands as students desperately tried to conjure spells without speaking, some pulling through well where others barely being able to produce anything at all. Tension rose throughout the room as more people slowly got paired off, everyone wondering who would be the next pair.

“Y/n and Five.”

Smiling, you walk up to the stage and face Five, seeing a small smile emerge from his stern expression. Wands at the ready, you wait for the call to start from the teacher, already knowing your strategy. The air turned heavy and the room turned quite as everyone was ready to watch the duel, you were both the highest achieving students in the class and people were eager to see who would be the best.

Then it started, Five casting the first spell only to have you deflect it, causing a gasp to echo through the room. You knew it would be a risky move to cast a spell that hadn’t been taught, a spell that wasn’t even in the curriculum. It was the only way you had ever found deflecting a spell without having the spell hit your opponent, Five was stunned for a second before hitting back with another spell, only for you to deflect it again and again and again. Waiting for a hesitation from Five to strike and then you got it, a gap in his relentless spell casting when he took a second too long to think about his next spell. 

Before he could blink, he was thrown to the floor with his wand flying out of his hand as you hit him with expelliarmus. Cheers erupted from students interspersed with nasty comments from the Slytherin students, you walk over to Five who was winded from his fall on the floor. Offering your hand he goes to take it before hesitating, under the watchful eyes of his Slytherin clique he lowered his hand and picked himself up, brushing down his robes. 

“Right!” Your teacher stood up on the stage with you and Five. “Class is dismissed, remember to keep practicing these non-verbal spells.” Your eyes never left Five as your teacher spoke, you felt a stinging sensation wash over your eyes accompanied by a throbbing in your chest at his actions. You shook your head and turned away, unable to keep looking at him without bursting into tears. 

“I need you to stay behind.” He turned to you, giving you a stern look only to soften when he saw you in near tears. Slowly, everyone left the room, either going to the library or commonrooms to await their next lesson due to the early finish. Closing your eyes, you gently tapping the lids with your fingertips to try and ease the stinging feeling, you take a deep breath before re-opening your eyes.

“Am I in trouble?” You say as you sit on the side of the duelling stage, legs swinging as you play with your hands.

“Not exactly,” He sighs, sitting in a chair facing you. “Where did you learn that?”

So you start to explain, lying as you went, as you explained you started to immediately regret even casting the spell in the first place. In fourth year you were spending a late night in the library, trying to find any books to help you excel in your classes, you had piles of books in front of you and then one book you opened had sheets of parchment paper interspersed with the other pages filled with spells that weren’t on the curriculum. It was filled with defence spells, jinxes, curses and more, it had been your guide ever since you found it. This, however, was not what you explained to him, simply saying you were doing some reading and found it and were unable to find the book again.

You could tell he didn’t believe you, but sensed that he wouldn’t delve too far into your story. “You can’t pull anything like that again,” He looked at you for a response so you just nodded. “I won’t go any further with this, you can go.”

The rest of the day went slowly, doing everything in your might to avoid Five, you had been patient with him all these years and him not even wanting to let you pull him up because of his little gang looking at him hurt, it stung. You know he’s loyal to his house but after 6 years of always hiding and sneaking around you just couldn’t bare it anymore, couldn’t bare the fact that Five had let this wizarding class war consume him.

Post day was always fun, hundreds of owls flying into the great hall and dropping off post from friends and family at home, some received letters while others got large packages sent in. Bruce was your barn owl, he was large, brown and robust, he would usually reside on your parents farm, being well loved and looked after by your whole family whilst you were away but always knew when you needed him in the castle.

In he came, swooping down with a letter tied to him and landing elegantly in front of you. Petting him with one hand while the other unties the letter, excited chatter filled the room as most other people were doing the exact same thing, wondering what their loved ones had sent them. Carefully opening the letter, trying not to tear the envelope, your eyes scan over the hand-written letter, smiling at all the information that was written in great detail.

At the very bottom they’d attached a photograph of them all together smiling, along with your dog and a few other animals they all looked after. As you were smiling and showing your friends you felt it get pulled out of your hand; turning around, you were met with one of Fives Slytherin friends waving your photo around, calling on his friends.

“Ere’ give it back.” Getting up, you try and swipe it from his hands only for him to hold it higher, scrunching it as he did.

“What are you going to do about it, mudblood-” Before he could finish his sentence the photo was snatched out of his hand by Five, lightly tapping it with his wand and the photo returned to pristine condition before handing it back to you with a small smile.

“Behave.” Five said to him, pulling him away from your table and back to theirs. A smile snuck onto your face as you sat back down, Five had never done anything like that outside the darkness of the library or the nightly patrols, let alone in front of his friends. 

Then, very slowly, he started to actively integrate himself into your life, talking to you in class, helping each other with homework after classes and even sitting with you at lunch on a regular basis. Building up your trust for him again, building up your friendship publically even with all the snide comments other people gave him, he ignored them all for you.

As winter rolled round, snow dusted the castle and surrounding areas as if it was a cake getting doused in icing sugar about to be presented for a meal. Cold nipped at your noses as you made the trek into Hogsmeade, students rushing to buy last minute presents for loved ones before christmas break as well as a stream of students flocking to the Three Broomsticks to get their last sips of butterbeer before the train journey home.

The Three Broomsticks was so full that students were being turned away, it was bursting at the brim with some students even even sharing chairs. The atmosphere was buzzing with excited students, conversations so loud that you couldn’t even hear yourself think. Five and yourself had been lucky, opting to come to the pub first thing then doing your christmas shopping, finding a small booth hid in the corner.

“So are you excited to go home?” He was wrapped up in a hoodie and jacket, a discarded hat and scarf lying on the table, leaving him with flushed cheeks and tousled hair. 

“I ain’t going home,” You say, taking a sip of butterbeer. “I never have, I’d have to get the muggle train back north, costs around 100 quid each way.” You tap your fingers against the half empty glass. “Canny afford it.” 

“You’ve never gone home for christmas?” Sadness was present in his eyes as he locked them with yours but you just shrugged.

“It’s not that bad, it’s like, my sixth year staying so everyone is just used to me now, I get to phone home and they basically give me access to the kitchen and all the teachers who stay put on interest lessons and such.” A breeze caused you to shiver, wrapping you jacket tighter around you. “I also help with the animals.”

Upon seeing you shiver Five leant over the table to wrap his scarf around your neck before gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear; the small display of public affection causing you to blush. Once you’d finished your drinks you head into town, looking down the alleys for all the little shops you could find, looking for the perfect gifts for your family, asking a slightly unenthusiastic Five for a second opinion and just receiving a series of raised eyebrows or nods of his head. 

Taking your time to walk back to the campus, Fives hand had found its way into yours, swinging your entwined fingers as you went. As the large castle came into view a bittersweet feeling washed over you, knowing that Five and everyone else would be leaving for the holidays tomorrow while you stayed at the castle. Even if the empty hallways felt like home there was always a pang in your chest on christmas morning, even if it did ease off during the day whilst sat round with friends and teachers, it still made your chest throb.

Joy was evident in the great hall, everyone talking loudly and laughing with their friends knowing they won’t be seen for the next two weeks, an exchange of gifts and cards being passed around. Slowly, everyone faded out to the dining hall, getting ready to get on the Hogwarts express home, you passed around hugs and goodbyes as your friends left the common room, all of them leaving cards and parcels by your bed and made you swear not to open them until christmas day. 

All morning you were looking around for Five but were never able to see him and as everyone left for the station you were convinced he had gone. Defeated, you walk through the empty hallways to the great hall for the regular meeting where the staff discuss the rules with the rest of you who had stayed behind. You heard a voice call your name behind you, quickly turning around, you see him. “Five?”

“They needed a male prefect to stay on campus,” He says as he gets closer, grin covering his face. “So I volunteered.” Instead of answering you just throw yourself at him, embracing him in your arms. His arms instantly wrap around your figure, resting his chin on the top of your head.

“Thank you, Five.”

[not-a-christmas-tree]

i watched the dallas theater company les mis and here are my observations part TWO

i recently watched a modern adaptation of les mis from 2014! i took hella notes bc les mis being set in modern day has a LOT MORE than you would think! i just posted my act one notes, so here are the ones from act two. enjoy! :D

ACT TWO

(Building The Barricade)

oh javert,,,you and your red beret-scarf combo

everyone shakes hands the same way?? they all like. half bro hug. young people ig 🤷‍♀️ 

oh on my own is gonna hurt me huh

éponine has her hands up when she goes to take the letter to cosette that’s an interesting take

jvj looks so done lmao “really bruh just give me the letter i’ll give it to cosette it’s FINE”

omg first time i’ve ever seen éponine not take the money after the letter!! that actually makes so much sense bc she doesn’t take marius’ money when he asks her to find cosette’s house either. that,,,yes that’s good

the modern era begs the question... why didn’t marius just ask for cosette’s number?? i’d assume it’s just a thing that jvj doesn’t allow her to have a phone bc The Cops, but. maybe marius and cosette are the straight version of cottagecore lesbians they just write letters for ~The Aesthetic~

(On My Own)

i was right on my own was gonna hurt me

first time i’ve ever seen an éponine disguise where she actually passes as a boy lmao 

FINALLY A VERSION OF OMO WHERE ITS NOT JUST FORLORN SELF-CARESSING THANK YOU

surprisingly i have less notes here that’s fun i thought i’d have more

(Javert at the Barricades)

WOAHHHHH THEY DID NOT SKIMP ON BARRICADE SET PIECES THAT SHIT IS COOOOOL

oh the barricade scenes are already hitting too hard 

cops are in riot gear cops. are in. riot gear.

oh the javert spy thing that also hits funny because obviously

gavroche is armed with a bat i love you son

FULL VERSION OF LITTLE PEOPLE AT THE BARRICADE AYEEEEE

(A Little Fall Of Rain)

wait hold on why is marius not,,,singing to éponine on “why have you come back here?” he’s like. scolding someone,,, huh??

oh enj goes to help marius with ép!! and he calls over who i assume would be joly i STAN

MARIUS CRIES AFTER ÉP DIES KILL MEEEE

(The First Attack)

i like how jvj does the second confrontation here. he looks less angry and more like,,,compassionate and that MAKES SENSE bc yk. he’s telling javert he’s wrong but he’s not doing it out of spite he’s doing it bc this guy NEEDS to know what he does as a cop and realize that being a cop isn’t just enforcing rules, and it never was just that. 

i do love the exasperated “gO” from jvj that’s kinda great ngl

(Drink With Me)

i’m very sad that there won’t be any exr from these boys

v e r y sad here

i do see grantaire looking PRETTY sad though

bold of y’all to assume that the modern day amis would all be straight

okay i can tell that grantaire really is going hard on the Existential Singing like,,,sure he’s just standing there but like. damn bro

SO THERE A R E LADIES ON THE BARRICADE WHY TF ARENT THEY FIGHTING

BETTER SEE SOME CHANGE THERE

i just realized that the cockades are buttons that is the BEST

(Bring Him Home)

jvj actually looks kinda happy in BHH and tbh i kinda like it?? it’s only on the “he’s like the son i might have known” line but i like it

oh those vowels oh boy they TALL

(The Final Battle)

enjolras is for some reason, still angry...why...why bro....

the staging for gavroche’s death is INTERESTING bc he’s reaching up at the sniper on the tower. hm. i dont hate it

OH SOMEONE ON THE BARRICADE IS RECORDING I THINK!!! GOOD ADDITION!!

i can’t imagine how many blood packs they went through 

oh enjolras’s death okay so. he’s in a like. No Man’s Land almost, and the riot cops come in after him. it’s an interesting take because it almost mirrors the scene in the book, except obvs grantaire isn’t here. they also have an added scene after he dies where cops are checking out and using radios that is. that is EERIE.

jvj walks over to enjolras’s body 🥺

HE ALSO FUCKIN S C R E A M S WHEN HE SEES MARIUS ON THE GROUND GODDAMN MAN O U C H

thenardier steals combeferre’s glasses wow thanks for that added pain

thenardier and jvj have a mini fight oh that’s kinda cool hm

(Javert’s Soliliquy)

javert opens his soliloquy with some SPICY SADNESS OH B O Y he sounds broken already!! start strong!!

emotions go broken - anger - confusion? - mAJOR confusion - hopelessness 

javert can FLY! no legit he’s on ropes

(Turning)

turning is. turning is almost a funeral. 

OH THEYRE N U N S !

nuns are visiting the barricade 🥺 

OH DAMN “what’s the use of praying if there’s nobody who hears?” THAT CERTAINLY HAS WEIGHT NOW THAT THEY ARE N U N S

it has just occurred to me that people have been dead on the floor for like. a solid five minutes 

(Empty Chairs At Empty Tables)

“now my friends. are dead. and gone” he pauses like he’s realizing it just then oh OUCHIE

wait is marius,,,at the barricades? is he legit singing to his friends dead bodies? oh shit oh NO

OH N O OH NONONO THIS IS WORSE

THE BARRICADE BOYS RISE UP FROM THE FLOOR OH N O OUCH OUCH

they group up and salute him and wALK OFF NO OWWWW

*cosette and marius kiss* jvj: *COUGH COUGH*

marius and valjean’s lil conversation is interesting in the way valjean seems to ask marius “who am i?” rather than ask himself. he phrases it in a way that makes me think he’s like. quizzing marius lmao 

(The Wedding)

omg i think baby cosette and éponine are flower girls 🥺🥺

“go away thenardier” *madame mouths ‘dammit!’*

thenardier your boat shoes hurt me

madame: “get up! get up!” thenardier: “stop—STOP IT!” 

TWO GUYS ARE DANCING TOGETHER AND WAVE AT THENARDIER ON “this ones a queer, but what can you do”

yeah i think i found my new favorite thenardiers thank you dallas theater company

fantine sits on the bench when cosette comes by, cosette sits on bench next to her, and fantine tries to touch her but can’t 🥺

jvj just gave a hand-over-heart head nod to cosette but fantine gave it back i,,,ouch

ENJOLRAS AND GAVROCHE ARE WITH FANTINE AND ÉPONINE FOR JVJ’S DEATH

the chain gang is in the epilogue i repeat the cHAIN GANG IS IN THE EPILOGUE

the orchestra rests on the last “say do you hear the distant drums” and that was the coolest thing i’ve ever heard

that final harmony is MONEYYYY and i want to cry

OVERALL NOTES:

this javert has the most interesting interpretation because up until his FINAL SCENE he is the stone cold police officer, and he plays it SO WELL. like i have never been truly angry at a javert up until this guy, and whether that was because it was modern and resonates A LOT in 2020 or he just looks like a cop i want to punch, I DON’T KNOW but he plays it SO WELL and i love it so much!!

these thenardiers are the fucking BEST NGL they are the perfect mix of funny and cruel. madame t is also funny as HELL and i wish i had her talent lmao

i said it before but the police costumes in this show are. woosh. kudos to the costumer i took one look at those guys and was like “haha, no!.” vaguely related to that, i think this was the first time i nearly cried at Look Down like. the first song at the show, simply because of the convict getting the SHIT beat out of him on the floor. that hurt me and i hate that it is completely accurate to what happens in prisons today.

lovely ladies was,,,a LOT and tbh, i feel like it didn’t need to be. obviously it does show how horrible it is for sex workers, but that is why the music is there. the music and lyrics is there to tell what you don’t show visually. (though i do love the male prostitute lmao he took no shit)

i also said this before but the fact that there wasn’t bigger of a relationship between enjolras and grantaire kind of annoys me simply because they are revolutionaries in the present day. you can’t tell me that ALL OF THEM WERE STRAIGHT. with how many people i know now that identify under the queer and trans umbrella, and also how queer they are (to me) in the brick, the absence of any exr in a modern interpretation hurts a little.

in conclusion, this show was fucking FANTASTIC and even though i’m six years late, it still resonates hard given the time we live in today. i think i nearly screamed when i saw the cops in riot gear on the barricade because that is LITERALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW. this just reminds me how timeless the story of les mis is because you had to change LITERALLY NOTHING from the story to make it make sense in the modern age, and that is really the lesson you should learn from les mis; these things happen everywhere, and they need to be fixed. 

thank you for listening to my rambling, i am sure i forgot something because there was just so damn much but i hope you enjoyed otherwise! not-a christmas-tree out! :)

[kiwidotcom]

ok this is like a legit blog post lmao. my sleep schedule is bizarre right now. so 4 am life blog post like its 2014 lmao

so many friends and people i know have been completing big projects in their lives, meeting huge goals, or just doing remarkably well for themselves recently. Of course im so happy for them but its been fucking with my head. for the last 8 years (minus the last 8 months lol) ive just been working full time or more, thinking that eventually id figure out what i want to do in life. but not only did i not figure out what i wanted to do, a pandemic hit and it completely fucked up the weird kinda path i had been on before. i feels like ive lost more than a year and a half it feels like ive lost an entire part of myself.

But pandemic right? i shouldnt feel bad about struggling when were literally living through something whose name the average person probably said four times before 2020. right?? except...

those people arent?? and not to say theyre not struggling. i know everyone has been through it these last 18 months. but seeing people my age, or more usually, a year or two younger than me, painting murals, or publishing magazines, or falling madly in love, its hard. Its hard when the greatest accomplishment ive had in the last few weeks is replying to an email from last october. i wish i was hyperbolizing. I mean its a seriously good day if i get out of bed and eat food that wasnt frozen. and if i clean the kitchen after?!! forget about it, im writing home about that. (i have yet to produce any such letters)

if money wasnt an issue, i know what id be doing. id be travelling all over the world. id be meeting people in hostels and letting them tell me where to go next, id try to learn new languages or be introduced to new cultures, id be using a plane ticket as a bookmark and a favourite food from every place.

but that was 2019 emma. sure she was scared of everything but she clenched her fists and ran toward it. now she cant even get out of bed enough to see out the window.

ok honestly this took a much darker turn than i expected. i actually feel ok right now. ironically, i would never have been able to write about any of this when the depression is really at its worst. which i think is why it all just fell out, because im finally able to verbalize this. because these last 4 or 5 days ive felt ok.

ive realized its ok to be starting my life at 25. as sad as i think that sounds. and that maybe im not as incapable as i think i am. (though, some things i am incapable of and sometimes its not just a matter of pushing through it, sometimes its a matter of recognizing that im brain damaged and to go easy on myself)

its only been for the last day but i think im genuinely considering going back to school. to work on a social work diploma but also maybe take like one art class at a time to finally finish my fine arts diploma???? i did a whole year, like, the pain of being an art school drop out is rough.

but anyway. my sleep schedule is MESSED AGAIN. idek why. it wasnt that bad until 2 nights ago. so im 3 melatonin in and its 4 am and im about to finish love island which i started earlier today. a guy on the show made a joke about his fiance finishing multiple shows and it burneddddd. i dont want to be this person. i dont think i am this person. oh my god i have so much more to say but i gotta stop because im going insane. why do i have so much energy at night ??!!

ok thats all. goooooodnight good morning

[nightmaretyrantvantas]

 Ok guys its finally finished!!

Introducing the last two main families in my anxciet au!

Please meet the princes

The Prince family

( from left to right)

Rebecca Prince

The boys’s Mother, goes by the names Mother, Ma, and Bec-bec

Her and Diana have been married for 7 years at this point, and been together for about 10(they met and started dating on and off since high school until they got back together permanently during college)

Punk mom punk mom punk mom punk mom punk mom-

She raised roman on her own for his first year before remus was born, in which she started dating Diana again more seriously

She majored in nursing and later in  sociology in college before dropping out to take care of her boys and raise them right

Shes currently going back to school for the sociology degree inbetween her current job

She works as nurse and receptionist at a doctors office in town

Shes in her mid forties current time( where roman is 22, remus is 21, and kingley is 14)

Shes a pretty tough love kinda parent, and doesnt mind rough housing with her boys when they get too out of line and rowdy( they all enjoy the playfullness of it)

But compared to Diana she is not the scary when angry parent, and she can actually be pretty lenient with the boys depending on the situation

She also tends to be the one who gives into their requests and in kingley’s case, puppy eyes, though she puts on a tough front when she does

Rebecca is such a softie for her family I just i cant she loves them so much

She makes dad jokes just to annoy and embarrass her sons, but only makes either classic dad jokes or purposely really bad ones

100% supportive of her older boys’s relationships, and loves to tease Roman about Patton all the time

She also enjoys building things, and helped build the play structure and treehouse that are in the backyard.

Shes probably the reason Remus has no filter, as she has little filter herself

Her hair is naturally honey brown but she dyed it recently to make a statement to a shitty coworker so currently her hair is purple blue and pink

Shes usually pretty reserved around anyone thats not her family, so its a bit of a shock when people see her playful and rowdy compared to her reserved, professional front

Remus prince

The middle child at 21 but hey he can (legally) drink!

Wild feral trash man no matter what, but now hes got a switchblade and two brothers hed fucking kill for( though he wont admit it about roman)

Hes dating Logan and shows a slightly softer side to him only, and hes ride or die with his boyfriend

He tried college but it didnt suit him, so he ended up dropping out and instead getting two part time jobs: one as a vet assistant and one as a bartender, both located near his current apartment

Hes been best friends with Ethen for as long as he can remember, they grew up together and he considers Ethen a brother practically, and remus would probably be in a bad place without him and Remus recognizes this

He has a love for theater and acting that he shares with his older brother Roman and was in pretty much every school performance growing up, and even majored in theater for a bit when he was in college

He also writes alot of original short horror stories 

Hes an adrenaline junkie and loves doing reckless things for the fun of it( usually dragging Ethen or Logan along with him)

He doesnt have a youtube channel of his own but he pops up frequently enough on Ethen’s channel when joining him for explorations that Ethen’s subscribers know him well, and love seeing him in videos

Hes only got two filter and their names are Logan and Ethen 

He wants to get a snakes as pets just as much as Ethen but Their apartment has strict rules 

That did not however stop him from bringing home a in rehabilitation small fresh water turtle home from work one day, and its the only exception to the no pets rule because Remus fought tooth and nail over the fact it was part of his JOB DAMMIT HES KEPPING THE TURTLE IT NEEDS CONSTANT CARE--

ahem. anyway the turtles name is Sir snappy and he adores her

He LOVES teasing both his brothers, even if it means getting teased back he can usually take what he dishes out

usually.

He also has a drivers license but does not currently have a car as he is trying to save up to buy a motorcycle 

Kingley “King” Prince

The youngest of the family!! The also the shortest!!

He goes by the nickname “ King” and has for a couple years now

Hes fourteen and hes very upbeat and cheerful!

Hes also one of Andy’s best friends( He isnt crushing on andy dont listen to remus) and theyve been friends since second grade

Did I mention that they have sleepovers as often as they can? Because they try to. Usually King, andy, and Liam are nearly glued to the hips unless they cant be

Hes got a wild imagination and lots of ideas that he loves to share and try to put out as songs, stories, drawings, etc

He has severe ADHD and takes medication to help him narrow his focus more, as well as to keep his energy levels more consistent so he wouldnt be hugely energetic in the morning and dull and falling asleep by noon. But the medication doesnt effect his creativity sometimes it even helps boost it because he can focus better on his ideas instead of getting too many ideas at once to focus on and work on

His hair has blonde highlights in the winter and looks nearly fully blonde in the summer

Hes got his mama’s caramel brown eyes and tanner skin, as apposed to his ma’s more peachy skin and green eyes

This boy loves to wrestle and roughhouse, hes got alot of energy that needs to be ran out by bedtime and what better way then wrestling his older brothers for the tv remote when they visit? Or playing games at the park or in the backyard until the sun goes down 

He also loves to sing and draw, he can usually be caught humming and you can find doodles all over his homework and school assignments

He also got braces when he was 12 and he loves them and always gets new colors for them as often as he can convinces his parents to agree to

Roman Prince

The eldest brother at 22!

He works at the local theater as a theater tech and assistant director and also performs in a good chunk of the plays put on as well

He loves his job, especially when they put on musicals

He has a college degree in directing and one in music composing

Hes known his boyfriend patton since they were kids since their families are really close, 

He also writes his own short plays and stories that are sometimes performed at his work!!

Oh and this boy our boy roman can cook, hes learned all his cooking from his parents and absolutely loves cooking and learning new recipes and experimenting with old recipes! He also brings extra food into work to share with his coworkers and the actors in case someone doesnt have food with them or the money to buy something( as some of the workers there are broke college students or high schools trying to get experience) He and Patton share this hobby and sometimes have playful cooking competitions in their kitchen!!

Hes got a huge dvd collection that fills tree shelves of a bookshelf in their apartment 

He also holds some acting lessons to younger workers at the theater in the case someone is struggling with a role or performace

Roman is also a very smooth motherfucker in the romace department when he wants to be. Hes romantic and pays alot of to little details and goes all out for date nights, whether theyre at home dates or going out dates he tries to make it as perfect to you as possible

Also he speaks spanish and likes to sing to Patton in spanish to swoon him on a bad day

Diana Prince

The boys’s other mother! Goes by Mama, Mum, and baba

Shes in her late thirties early fourties

did I mention theyve been married for years? I did? Good good

Diana is a blunt sweetheart with a bubbly, snappy personallity and a fiery temper

Shes really good with kids and has a degree in child psychology and works as a guidance counselor at the local high school

She also helps out at their neighborhood’s church with events and sometimes helps with services as an organ player

She plays piano and has been since she was young, she can also play the guitar

She absolutely adores her family but watch out if they break a rule or get themselves into trouble she is the stern one and does not let them get out of trouble. Puppy eyes are wasted on her you do the crime you do the time and the extra chores no arguing.

That is not to say that she wont listen and hear her boys out though, its just normally after hearing them out theyre still in the wrong( pray for remus is he ever got arrested for anything cough cough the homecoming incident cough cough)

Shes been friends with Emile since high school and sees his boys almost like her own, and cares for them as such. 

She speaks spanish and told Roman and the others from a young age, but Roman is the only one who kept with it strongly, Remus only uses it when he angry and King is still learning

Shes an amazing cook, on par or even better than Emile( a statement that has been yet to be confirmed)

She is also a confirmed lover of making big meals 

She loves being outdoors and playing with her kids

She also enjoys doing embroidery as a relaxing hobby

And lastly introducing...

The Daniel family!!

(from left to right)

Olivia Daniels

Logan and Liam’s mom! Shes a psychology professor at the local college! 

Shes been going by the name Olivia for about 16 almost 17 years now and shes never been happier!

Olivia is technically their step mother, as she joined the family after Logan and Liam were born, but very early in their lives( Logan was 10 and Liam was three)

shes in her mid thirties

Her and richard have been married for 12 years and are still going strong!!

olivia is more of a gentle soul kinda person, shes peppy and softer spoken and has a very soothing and trusting presence to her. Shes easy to make laugh and loves making people smile

She also enjoys bringing treats to her classes for her overworking students

Shes not much of a cook but she does try dammit

Looks super sweet but shes a force to be reckoned with if you fuck with her children let me tell you

She wouldve made an excellent therapist had she gone into that field, shes good at listening and offering solutions

She also paints in her spare time!! And sells her paintings at local art shows!!

Shes got the worst sweet tooth ever Richard has to hide sweets in the house

She also works at the same college Logan attends, same with his father

Shes the only blonde in the family with green eyes

 Logan Daniels

Out sassy skeptic! He’s 20 years old and currently attending college with a biology major and a astrology minor!

Hes pretty reserved at first glance, being the calm and common sense to both his best friend Virgil and his boyfriend Remus

But hes such a dork when you get to know him. He could go on for hours and hours about his interests(something Remus loves listening to)

He lives in a single person dorm on campus and works in the student union as well as does tutoring sessions for high schools for extra credits

Hes been dating Remus for a good four almost five years , and they met in freshman year of high school

His dorm room is covered in various posters for astrology and bands he enjoys, as well as a few old theater posters from Remus’s old performances

He was  goddamn punk during high school, and Virgil loves to bring this up to embarrass him

He likes to always wear business casual unless hes staying in, and even then sometimes he keeps to his fashion habits a little too hard

Hes a decent cook, but he doesnt refuse the offer of someone else cooking for him either( or even going out to eat now and then) 

Hes a very large and firm skeptic and greatly enjoys debating with virgil different aspects of his beliefs and paranormal experiences, and functions as the one between them to reason away happenings with logic as a way to ease Virgils nerves. 

But he IS willing to see his best friends side of things if he is provided solid proof. 

He also makes plenty of appearances on Virgil’s channel for a variety of reasons, and his fanbase really likes him

Hes also a very protective older brother, and is not afraid to verbal destroy anyone who hurts his little brother(much to Liams angsty horror) 

He does have a car that he put Remus on his insurance for, so if his boyfriend ever DID need to drive it he would without complications

Logan also does join the boys on explorations, though this is a more rare occurance as he’d rather help them edit the videos and put them out in a timely manner

Hes pretty good at managing his student budget, but he has those moments of splurging randomly for things( as we all do sometimes)

Hes got a really REALLY nice laugh that not too many people outside his inner circle have heard

His eyes are a dark blue just like his dads, and he keeps his dark brown hair messy but practical

Liam Daniels

Logan’s baby brother! Our boy is 13 years old!!

Hes andy’s other best friend, and the final link to their little trio

Hes the more stoic of the three, as he is entering his rebellious angsty teen years a couple years early. 

He loves space and the ocean, and wants to be a marine biologist someday.

Hes not the best at being social, thats why hes got King as their talker and hes the snarky fighter

This boi is alot fiestier than he looks but only his friends and family know that, and he will throw down if you even just look at his loved ones the wrong way( despite his height)

He doesnt always get social cues either which makes him come off kinda rude in situations but I promise he doesnt mean it 

Someone got his mothers sweet tooth but cant have too much sugar because it messes with his body too much

like when he crashes from a sugar high he crashes hard and its BAD

Hes the shortest of his friends, just barely half an inch shorter than Andy

He always looks half tired and like he needs coffee but he cant have coffee so...

he loves to read and his room is filled with so many books!!

He also has a stuffed animal collection but shush about that its a secret

Hes also a spicy food lover( at least to a point, nothing too extreme) 

He likes baggier clothes because theyre more comfortable, and he prefers comfort of fashion

His eyes are a brighter blue and he keeps his hair alot neater than his brother’s

Hes also very snappy, with a comeback for almost everything

Richard Daniels

The dad!! He works as a chemistry professor at the college and a part time physics teacher at the local high school( switching days)

Hes very tall at 6′2(compared to the rest of his family)

He looks really strict but hes surprisingly laid back about alot of things( though rules and discipline are NOT one of those things) 

He is in his early fourties

He took care of the boys on his own for logans first ten years and Liams three before he met Olivia

Hes got the scolding parent look and The Tone mastered and sometimes even uses both on his students to get them to behave, with wildly successful results

Hes very logical and skeptical of things “unrealistic”

Was a stressed out stick in the mud before he met his wife, as he was a new single father trying to secure tennure in a teacher job

Hes the cook in the house, and is really good at it.

hes a more silent understood supporter of his children, as he is much more reserved than his wife

But he as the biggest soft spot for her 

He always tries to raise his boys with a strong balanced set of values and manners

He also can play lacrosse, and was considered the best player back in school

He doesnt have a good relationship with his family aside from his mother, so the boys have only met their grandma on that side, as he doesnt want any toxic mindsets or ideals influencing his children( especially Liam)

compared to Olivia  he isnt soft spoken at all but he would rather dissolve issues with communication and clarification, not anger or violence( yeah LIAM)

He also enjoys watching documentaries and doing casual photography from time to time

And its finally done!! All for families are complete and posted!!

Im really proud of these!! Especially the prince family photo! It took me days to figure out the poses...

All art referenced is credited to @aimasup @underdog-arts and @fangirltothefullest !!

Anyway i hope you guys enjoy! And hopefully soon ill be posting some writings for this au too! And posting more drawings! Enjoy!!

Taglist

@phantommoonpeople

@sweetsweetemo

@leesacrakon

@amazable01

@starbucks-remy

@jemthebookworm

@max-is-tired

@seriously-a-dragon

@sar-kasstic

@soupspam

@strawberryjellystuff

@aimasup

@unsocialchapeau

@underdog-arts

@fangirltothefullest

[739337369137371082]

Hey so I found u thru the Halved Live Funnies and I gotta ask... whose Leon? What series these dudes from?

i got this ask and then forgot about it for like 2 days. anyways.

IVE ANSWERED THIS BEFORE BUT. GOD. LEON. ok so like....... long story short last year was when i first played resident evil........ bc we got a copy of re2remake in and.... jesus christ. i hyperfixated so fucking hard for the better part of a year going on into this year. and then i watched hl/vr and well. we know where that went. but now i am once again hyperfixated and now im back to where i was in like.... june of last year LMAO. but anyways i am once again going to ramble under the cut about them <3 (seriously. its very long and doesnt go much of anywhere. also spoilers)

tl/dr:

OK. SO. resident evil. the last time i answered this ask i either hadnt played some of them or just completely forgot the plot of others LOL but now upon beating/playing a large majority of them (besides 6 which i have not touched yet, and 7 is first person and im not rly interested in it rn)...... well others have said this as well but if you like cheesy b action movies you would love resident evil!!! 

the orig 1-2 are more survival horror which is what i like the most. 3 is where it starts branching into more actiony stuff but is still survival horror. but 4 and after is just like..... cheesy action stuff which is fine but not really like.... my thing. altho i do think that they are fun in a “this plot is hilariously bad” type way because i do enjoy horrible things. but people who like resident evil dont like it for the plot they like it for the characters. and for me i latched the fuck onto leon kennedy and tyrant t-00 aka mr fucking x

listen.......... you guys know me relatively well enough to know that i have a type......... and i would define leon as not really fitting under it usually because he is 1. under 6 foot 2. human and 3. very much not a villain. but something about (mostly remake) leon hits fucking different!!!!!! hes kind and means well, thinks about others constantly, looks like an actual fucking person in the in game graphics instead of being some manufactured perfect model, nice voice, etc....... i fucking care him so much. also gameplay wise i find his weapons to be more enjoyable than claires so i always end up playing his route/2nd route the most compared to hers. but i do also like claire :) shes nice and epic

i dont really like the newer leons (4 and afterwards) as much.... i mean a lot of it has to do with trauma and general “growing up” after what happened in re2 but hes just so constantly... snarky? jaded? constantly spouting lines to make him seem cool? when in my head hes very much like... a loser LMAO. i mean dont get me wrong hes a badass. he survives a fucking zombie outbreak and nearly gets murdered dozens of time. thats the definition of badass. but also you cannot change my mind that hes also a anxious loser twunk. there is literally nothing you can do to convince me he is “cool” like the games and movies want to think. this is probably heresy to re fans but this is my truth

https://youtu.be/aVZWuSfGStk?t=129

here is a vid of his cutscenes. obvious spoilers in there but you can skip around and see how cute he is. also yes in his first cutscene he is listening to butt rock. i switch between thinking hes just listening to it because nothing else is on the radio or his taste really is that terrible

also you literally CANNOT convince me that he is straight. the games try SOOOOO hard to get you to ship leon/ada or leon/claire but like...... i cannot see it. he has one of the gayest run animations i have ever seen in re2 remake and i mean... he just radiates gay trans man energy to me. also please look at this small scene from one of the animated movies where a licker jumps on top of him and he wraps his legs around its hips and lifts it off of him to not die. gay king

https://youtu.be/d-VNikxYBPw?t=9

but yes ive basically decided to ignore all characterization from re4 and onwards regarding leon at least. every leon after that is not my leon (except in special cases when im thinking about something like leon/jd from re damnation..... they did jd so dirty and they should have fucking kissed. or how cute he looked in vendetta sometimes)

ANYWAYS. MR X

so basically there are these enemies in resident evil called “tyrants” that are manufactured by the evil capitalist company umbrella that are near indestructible save for like.... rocket launchers or super heavy artillery that youre not buying at your local gun store. and in re2 one of them get sent to the police station where leon and claire are and is told to wipe out all witnesses. (i also do think that 2 or more were sent there... or at least in the area when this happened due to some very obvious plot hole stuff on each route no matter how you play, even tho the devs have come out and said that only 1 existed in the game and that each route is like “a parallel dimension” to each other. i wont go into it more than that but i choose to ignore that)

and well. when i first played it i knew of mr x but didnt like... know much about him other than that he was a monster and Tall (like 7 or 8 feet tall) and that he chased you around. that already sold me on him but then. well. you first encounter him because he lifts up an entire goddamn helicopter and then proceeds to chase you. and it was then that i knew i was in deep shit because he fucking stomped his way into my heart and never left.

mr x basically has serious Side Character Disorder where (even tho the remake made him very cool and epic and did him really well compared to nemesis in re3 remake which is an entire different can of worms) he has LITERALLY no personality or like. thoughts. or anything. hes only there to chase you around and be on screen for like 10 seconds for a couple of cutscenes and then not show up again until the very end of the game for you to fight on leons route. but god. he means so fucking much to me. 

you know how people latch onto random side characters that have no personality and essentially flesh them out more than the creators ever will? thats me with mr x. its gotten to the point where certain songs come on on my spotify and i actually get EMOTIONS or even TEARS because they remind me of him, but its not even really HIM, its the fucking ideas that ive come up with regarding him because all he ever does in game is chase you around and punch you and then die and is never brought up again

but anyways. mr x is a tall monster who chases leon and claire around in their routes but mr x is leons main monster in the game (claire has a different one). he chases leon around, literally never stops looking at him as he chases him, gets hit by an entire fucking car which then explodes BUT THEN chases him down into the sewers and into a secret underground lab just to get to him like a fucking bloodhound who, once he has the scent, will never stop chasing him

(you can see why this made me kind of insane)

just. AGHHH. the tyrants in this series get treated so dirty. i desperately want capcom to give us some sort of tyrant that can actually fucking like.... go against orders and brainwashing or whatever and actually have emotions and thoughts!!!!!!!!!! but capcom would never do anything with it cause its a rough and tough action series and people arent here to see tyrants have some sort of thought process beyond punching and killing and people only want to shoot guns at them instead of thinking about the possibilities of a tyrant that goes against its programming.

i so desperately want an au where mr x got the transmitter shot off of the side of his head (and while capcom never mentioned this ever many re2 fans have since decided that it is what feeds info/orders to him. i flip flop between thinking that it either is near controlling him and prevents free will and thought or that its just giving him orders and that hes just burying/hiding/not showing free will and thought in fear of being killed. either that or someone at umbrella is “piloting” him but also the whole point of tyrants is that theyre supposed to be smart enough to think for themselves somewhat so... eh). GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

ive explained a bunch of this stuff in my other ask about it but just...... xleon means so much to me when it should not and will never be actually canon

anyways please play re2 remake at least, you dont have to know everything about re1 to like it, just go into it knowing that a few months ago in the mountains outside raccoon city claires brother chris and a few members on his team went to a mansion where they discovered umbrella doing shady zombie shit there. re2 remake was hyped up for years for a reason and it is really good, even if its short (altho i do appreciate short games in this day and age cause not every game needs to be like 60 plus hours long). 

maybe one day when its not late and i can actually think i will explain all this better but todays not that day <3

(EDIT: ALSO RE DAMNATION TYRANTS ARE 14 FEET TALL. AND CHASE AROUND LEON AND ACTUALLY FUCKING RUN. FUN FACT! anyways while i do think jd in that movie and leon should kiss i also want leon and a tyrant from that movie to kiss. bye)

[jackalopefreckles]

I feel like Ive aged at least 6 years since covid started. Im angrier. Less adapted to being outside then I used to be- which is saying a lot. This time last year I was?? Actually healthier mentally then I had ever been and looking forward to having the house alone for a month which?? Was the most freedom I wouldve ever had.

A lots fucking changed. I drove halfway across the country- all 30 hours at once with my big brother AND two elderly dogs, plus my cat. All animals on too many drugs (the vet said they couldnt overdose, and then failed to give any further instruction) cami peed on herself twice, unable to move. I had to waterboard her in Phoenix, a truly terrifying hell city where all the roads are raised and overlapping and its a hot as shit cause its?? What june?? Time was so fake this year I mustve just been stoned the whole time till I ran out of weed, and since moving its been a relief to be able to turn off the spinning anxious thoughts for a few hours

my big brother joined us. He brought a new dog with him which?? Is always a lot, plus I have this pack of dogs now cause the puppy wouldnt leave the super cancer ridden dog alone, and Im able to get her cbd regularly here, so shes always comfortable now instead of just?? Sometimes which is a lot nicer. We didnt think shed make it to chrisrmas. I thought shed die with me home alone to take care of everything, like always. It was almost a relief, I wouldn't have to coach my brother through the grieving process at least, and I had already finished. Its hard now even, for me to realize she might even have another christmas (but I wont hold my breath)

I feel safer going outside here then I did in Austin. I only went out a handful of times in texas, for the last few months I was ordering almost all groceries, and only going to the store once mask mandates were mandatory (theyre not anymore. Im so worried for texas. I missed a huge freeze by mere months. I dont think my elderly dogs wouldnt survived it. If I was alone with them, Im not sure I woudlve.

My parents took my brother to mexico with them. I begged them not to go, told them how irresponsible it was to travel across boarders. To visit an island and take all the plane germs with. I told them that even if my mom and brother were staying at home all day with me, my dad was still going to work and he didnt know what his coworkers were doing. That they wouldn't know what the people on the plane were doing. That at any point they could become the stupid americans that killed half an islands population.

They left a week after today last year. The boarders were closed the next day. Their friend has been traveling back and forth ever since. I have no idea how, except for the fact shes white and rich and wont hesitate to destroy a child, so I can only imagine how shed treat costomer service.

I will no longer allow this angry aggressive woman to ever make me feel bad, and I will allow myself to finally fight back. Im an adult, maybe not all the time (cause lets be real I'll always be a bit too eccentric for most) but when I get angry and allow myself that anger, it's not a bad thing. Anger doesn't have to make me feel like Ive done something wrong. Im usually very just in my actions, and I wont allow my parents influence to tell me all anger is misdirected and hurtful for reasons I couldnt understand. Its okay for me to be angry.

I think being alone with animals for months is at least reassuring that my childhood was unreasonable if nothing else. Which of course is a silly polite society term for pretty fucked, if nothing else.

My aunt had to gall to say weve had a good 2020 cause our family wasnt hurt, and I had to walk away from the zoom call. I haven't attempted communication with any of them since, not that I normally do. Of course none of us died, all rich old white people, most of them retired and able to stay home all day (not that all of them did, I learned about my grandfathers routine and just.. Im honestly surprised no one got it yet. Of course I knew from the beginning if anyone was gonna get it and die, it probably wouldve been me. Hence the 8 months of solitude before the move.

Was the move in August?? Im so unsure about time. Even with 2020 vision.

I tried to date when I moved here. Strictly on tinder. What was the point? On and off testosterone due to the wonders of texas, hadnt changed my body nearly as much as they should've a year after being on them. I look much more handsome now. Im also allowing myself to toss gender aside completely. He/him doesn't mean man, and they/them dont mean nonbinary, so why not mix them since Im?? Not really either.

It wasnt even a thought process like that to start. Much more "this is nice" which I think more gender should be allowed to be. Dont gotta be deep just comfortable.

I wont ever allow my parents to forget what they did. I ended up with three dogs I didnt want (I was so looking forward to not having any dogs) and I ended up taking care of my brother. Again. Its easier without my parents at least. Everything always is. My dogs are even happier. Cami finally isnt anxious 24/7. Again, a sad reminder my childhood wasn't great. Daisy is healthier. Trauma can be stored emotionally or with health issues, often both. I think the cancer dog getting better and?? Surviving and thriving so much longer then the vet said (how good was my old vet?) Is another unfortunate nail in thay proverbial coffin.

Im not as soft and openly loving. Im even more touch starved somehow. Harsher. I still want to choose love and compassion, but Im not letting myself fall into the trap of being so nice people wont be nice to you. Fighting back is something I wont feel shameful about, because it never stopped me from doing it completely anyway.

I was already reaching this on my own though. This was just more coffins, more nails. This didnt need to happen. We know our government let this happen. Its still letting it happen. Im not sure when Im getting my vaccine. My big brothers sick of quarentine and keeps trying to get us to go out. Sometimes I yield, and we go to a park, or the top floor of the parking garage. I get a vegan hotdog from nearby. We talk and laugh and were genuinely just. Boys being boys.

I shouldn't have to deal with parent shit anymore. I do though, especially since two out of three are unemployed and we can really only afford to live here cause of them (they owe me if anything though. Especially with my brother and these animals) I hope I can get a job soon. Or maybe even go back to school. Im lucky I had so much saved up (for top surgery, which I guess wont happen before Im 25 like I really tried for. I wouldve done it before now, but texas waitlists and rules kept holding me up. I literally went to an appointment in dallas, a 4 hour drive, just to found out the surgeon canceled on me for the second time)

Its incredibly depressing, and I know Im lucky to have had that stash. So many people didnt have anything and lost so much. People lost people. Half a million at this point. I remember when it got to 300,000 and I just?? Felt so awful it was so close to how many people we lost to AIDS. Its over that by so many now. It doesn't really stop, does it??

Is that catholic guilt?? Or maybe just irish guilt in general. Is it something I inherited or earned through all the end of the worlds and once in a lifetime recessions Ive been through. Im not sure how many off the top of my head, theyve been coming since I was so small and its always more and more. Im not even catholic anymore. I cant stop being irish though, even though the brits tried (and succeeded. Weve lost a lot. The current royal cotastrophy is bullshit as well, the only person who deserves a royal title is from Meniappolos

My home is decorate all inside for st patrick's day. My big brother loves it so Im going all out, and its def making me feel much more irish then usual (which is a lot Im over half)

I think I just wanted to say Im not the same. I hope I can still be happy an obnoxious is public. I wonder if I remember how

[reconnecting]

been thinking about being disconnected lately.

its mostly a rambling vent, i kind of lost what i was saying for a bit.

years ago, we did this almost same thing. we tried, for years, to reconnect with our Breton people, because the body is part that.

its a dying culture? okay, well lets see what i can find. mostly christianized things, but some other stuff, so lets focus on that. its all in french or breton, okay, let me try to learn some of that so i can read. how do the dances work, what are the instruments, who did we worship before, wheres our music, whats our culture, who am i who am i who am i?? can i learn? can i join? how does it work tell me tell me tell me who i am even though you cant.

the information is almost all gone. the older generations are pretty much the only ones to know about it, and i cant talk to them because they speak breton and nobody speaks breton. okay where can i find out more, how do i find out more? traditional clothes? music? the music is almost only in france because celtic festivals dont include breton normally.

and now?

i work up the courage to work past an abusive grandfather and find out about the other side. puerto rico, okay. things dont fit let me keep looking this doesnt match what we know. taino, okay. that matches things better, but... orphaned family means we were cut off. who knows things? nobody. ill keep asking, new questions, different questions. check a dna test, find relatives on that side, ask them. what do they know? finally find someone who does, has family the same age, same generation as the one we got cut off at, and they look so similar in photos.

okay lets go off this what do you know what can you tell me im sorry to ask im so sorry i have nothing to give you but can you help??

they will, they do. they tell me our tribe doesnt exist anymore, that so few do. that they still practice. they have the clothes, the names, the dances, the music. they have the traditions still and no tribe name because there werent enough to be a tribe a few generations back. i ask if they ever knew the name, they say theyll ask, i hope for the best. their family has dementia in it too. what else can even be done about that? nothing. im sorry for asking, thank you for answering. i have so many more questions.

the elders i speak to have no answers. i ask them the questions and they respond until i say what i know, and they have no answers either. how can they? i hope they still help, i hope theyll teach me, but they cant have all the answers either. i know this. hopefully they have some. hopefully its not too much, too much asking.

i look on my own. i ask others. they offer to help, to find my familys tribe if they can, but if theyre gone... what then? the family says theyre gone. been nameless for too long, will there be anything else to find? i cant ask the person who offered to help, the language barrier confuses both of us, and this issue is too complicated for me to explain to him. i look up information. the things weve been saying for years, the same things, theyre things my ancestors did, things connected to my culture.

i wonder how it is that i got these things, if its coincidence, if a coincidence like that is even possible with how many similarities there are.

i feel like im eating my own tail.

i ask my friends what to do, they have no answers except to learn, hope that itll work out. they tell me it should, its not that uncommon a situation. it should be fine, keep up hope, im not alone, we arent alone, were family, theyll teach us what they know. theyre right but it doesnt stop the knowledge that their nations aren’t mine. ill learn. ill learn whatever im taught but its not Mine to learn, to pass on.

i ask my friends about my grandfather, the other one, if its polite to try and learn about his culture as well if i dont claim it. they say yes, yes, i Should know, I should learn Something about it. i ask, his grandmother was cherokee, they dont know the tribe, the family is all dead already. i dont ask why. the dementia hits hard, he doesnt remember, there are happier things to remember, dont trigger an episode.

connected on so many sides to different cultures, what should be recently. just a few generations away. i met my great great grandmother, i could have met the others, they could have been alive, they could have taught me. it wasnt that long ago and i didnt meet them, i didnt know. nobody knew. nobody connected though.

why did nobody connect? i cant understand that but i have to. i understand one grandfather, he is racist, is abusive. its a tactic. i understand that, even if i hate him. i understand another grandfather, the generational gap, the timing, the ages of them all. i understand that it was probably for safety. i understand my grandmother. it wasnt her interest to ask, past what she grew up with. nobody asked past what they grew up with.

i cant understand why they didnt ask. why do i have to be the one to ask, to do this legwork? it would have been easier for my mother, for my grandparents, to do this. it would have been easier. more recent, more connected, more resources. and they didnt. should i be upset? am i allowed to be?

my friends say i am. ‘youve just found out your family is almost all gone, youre allowed to be upset.’ “its a hard thing to know your culture and not be able to grasp it. its okay.”

my mother doesnt. when i bring it up she looks disappointed. i get it. the family that she connects to it is abusive, ruined her life. i understand. but this isnt them, theres more beyond it. she looks with those eyes. “why would you want to know? you grew up without it, isnt this enough? arent we enough?”

i have no response. how can i explain the feeling of someone standing behind me, shoving, pushing, saying i have to? how can i explain the feeling like if i dont, something will go horribly wrong, that i need to connect now or itll be gone forever? how do i explain that im the last chance we have to connect, to learn? im the last generation that could do this? how do i explain that to people who dont care, who gave that chance up?

my sister doesnt understand. i ask if she wants to learn, wants to try, and she sounds interested until i explain it will take work. shes interested in the claim, but when i say that shed have to study, have to catch up with the knowledge of the people who lived their lives in it, she drops it, stops asking questions. what do i do with that? she should be interested, shouldnt she? why would you not want to know, or only want to know up until i say it takes work? ive put in over a full days worth of work this week alone, just on this topic, on finding out the little that i know now, and could never regret it, but i say it takes works and she leaves the room with a polite dismissal.

i want to connect. i want to know, what are the cultures that should be in my family like? how do i find them? how do i learn, what do i do, who will teach me, will anyone? why is nobody interested in connecting except for me?

why is it only something they care about when its convenient?

[tamaharu]

sits down in your inbox. we've talked about how scollace would get married but let's get back to the basics: what's your ideal getting-together scenario for them

AGGGGHHH this is actually really hard to answer okay so i think its like the slow burn mutual pining roommates au of my dreams except a whole lot worse bc theyre both terrible as like, people, and it lasts FOREVER. the problem is canon actually deals with scotts.. scott-ness in a really delicate way, and i do not think the two of them would get together until scott manages to get himself under control. so i will give two answers: the real one, and the funny one. this is going to be kind of long and less tender than you might hope lmao

the REAL scenario is where most of pre-ramona v1 and their past plays out the exact same as canon. like, they meet in uni, they become best friends, envy breaks up with scott, and he and wallace move in together sometime during scotts hazy year. and, unfortunately, scott still ends up dating knives.

ramona kind of acts as a catalyst for scotts emotional growth (and he in turn for hers) which i have talked about in a post somewhere in my drafts, so the way this works out would have to be scott going to therapy. i think scott and knives would date slightly longer than in canon bc while his friends and wallace are discouraging the relationship fully for the age gap, theres no extra pressure of the cheating. they DO break up eventually when scott has an epiphany or whatever like oh my GOD. this is CREEPY. and he breaks up w her. theres still a whole knives subplot going on but w less cheating.

ANYWAYS they visit envy again this time w/out having to fight her bf, and this time when he sees wallace at the place, he (gasp) doesnt have to cuddle. thats right, in the scollace au of our dreams, since scott isnt dating anyone, wallace doesnt feel like theyre in the right place for wallace to properly move on from his lingering crush on scott. he does force scott to talk to a counselor though.

then blah blah blah therapy blah blah emotional growth blah blah scott finally gets a job working w stephen stills and brags about it to wallace and wallace is like “cool, so can we buy a house or” bc theres no question at that point that theyll be moving w/out each other. so they buy a house. cue more therapy blah blah apologies to all the women in his life hes hurt like a LOT blah blah we’re recording right now blah blah maybe scott goes back to school blah.

wallace and scott would probably get even closer once scotts stopped acting like a dick all the time, and like scott is obviously bisexual, duh, and hes pretty secure about it, so when his friends start joking about them acting like a couple he laughs it off no biggie. except it begins to dawn on him very slowly that maybe they.. maybe they DO act like a couple.. meanwhile wallace is like i have not dated anyone seriously in like, two years at least. this is all scotts fault.

there’d probably have to be like. a catalyst to make them actually admit feelings, either in the form of a person (probably lisa or envy or smth) or an event (aka one im partial too where scott gets top surgery and when wallace cares for him the entire time scott is like maybe i DO be gay) but something happens that forces scott to compartmentalize his actual deep-seated feelings for wallace and after that its just a measure of scott doing something romantic for one and wallace going :wide eye emoji: :wide eye emoji: :wide eye emoji: wait my feelings and fantasies of like idk 3-4 are FINALLY GETTING REALIZED?????? and then they become the bitchy gay power couple of my wildest hopes

the FUNNY scenario is during the middle of scotts therapy speedrun arc he gets really drunk with wallace for the first time in a while and *fade to black* then they wake up in bed together the next morning and both go “huh. guess this is happening now” and date for five years before getting married, moving to the bahamas, and adopting three children a pitbull and a longhair cat

[whirlybirdwhat]

that Slytherin au

So remember that post a while back where I had a harry potter au for one piece where all the Strawhats were in slytherin due to their strong ambition present at an early age to achieve their dreams? No? well here it is anyway lol

Check out this post for some more reasoning behind the idea – note that I do headcanon some characters to not be slytherin, but for the sake of this au and the actual technicalities of the Sorting Hat theyre in Slytherin.

Here we go!

AU will start off with Luffy as a first year, and all canon age differences, meaning Usopp is in his grade, Nami’s one year older than them, Sanji and Zoro above her, and the rest Adults!

Save for Chopper – a special case, a mythical creature raised as human by Hiruluk in the northern mountain range. He looks somewhat more human than canon but is definitely a reindeer. When Hiruluk died and he was given to the care of Kureha, she sent him to Hogwarts (after a few years of learning from her) due to his wish to know more. He was accepted as a political ploy as an olive branch to other magical creatures – ‘ we accept you!’. He doesn’t care. He might be furry but he’s here to learn and be the best healer ever!!! Hence, Slytherin, the boys got ambition and needs some powerful families to back him up! He is in Luffy’s grade, even though he’s younger (technically)

The biggest reason for the Strawhats to be in this House is because of their ambition - but there are other reasons too!

Sanji is from a family of Gryffindors – heroes who are anything but. He wants to be the exact opposite of them in any way he can. When Zeff adopts him, he unlearns his family taught prejudices against Slytherins and when he goes to Hogwarts, tells the sorting hat in no uncertain terms that he wants to be in Slytherin.

Nami herself is cunning, and I would place her in Slytherin even if this wasn’t a Slytherin Au. She’s the perfect slytherin down to the T except for one thing – she doesn’t know her magical origin, as she was adopted at a young age. She gets a lot of shit for that, which she gives right back, as well as taking some money along the way! She also doesn’t fall in with the Magic is Superior ideology that many of her peers have – magic didn’t save her town, or Bell-mere, or her orange trees, magic isn’t superior. Magic is a tool to her, not a way of life, and science can help a lot! For instance, she made the Climatact Spell Set, with help from Usopp, which combines her knowledge of weather patterns, the environment, brief weather spells, and heat and cool manipulation spells, to create weather based attacks. For instance – it takes a lot of energy to summon and sustain/direct a storm… but if Nami can create one with use of low power cooling/heating spells and the environment – she can do a lot.

-      More Below!

A zoro that is Cursed to always be lost is something that I’ve seen often and Im HERE FOR IT! If someone could direct me to the original creator of that headcanon I would love to credit them for it! To Be Clear AGAIN this idea is not mine, but I want to credit whoever’s it is because I love it. 

 That aside, Zoro is like Nami in that he doesn’t know his magical heritage. However, as a child he got the misguided idea that more wand equals more power, which he somehow manages to make actually work. Thus, Zoro has three wands, each with powerful beginnings. Im thinking powerful dragon heartstrings core for one wand, Thestral for Kitetsu, and  Rougarou hair for the last sword – Zoro’s a bloodthirsty kid and he needs some bloodthirsty wands :/

 Usopp’s a halfblood! He’s kinda scared of Hogwarts as his magical parent (Yasopp) has kinda been outta the picture for the most part, but he’s ready for this!! As soon as the kid practically vibrating with excitement to his left doesn’t explode. Usopp originally desired to be part of Gryffindor – house of the Brave, right? But after talking to Luffy, he’s not so sure.  He wants to be his own hero – all on his own, not because he part of the hero, brave house. When Luffy is sorted before him into Slytherin, Usopp makes the descsion to follow him, and follow his goal. He’ll show the world he can be the best!!

He grows to be really good at herbology and potions – an odd mix, but you know whats odder? Mixing the two to chuck at people for pranks then turning it into your fighting style. Go Usopp!

Brook’s a cursed ghost – he’s bound to his living body, but the body’s just bones and bones lol. He makes it work – people know him first as the Soul King after all! He can barely remember his school days, but hes vaguely sure he was in slytherin – he remembers many parties held in dungeons, looking out to the lake for sightings of a curious aquatic beast (Laboon!)

Franky’s still a shipwright, but of ~magic~ ships. His brother’s ships are better known, but his are more sought after by… certain people (more on that later.) When he was a kid, he walked straight into Hogwarts, looked for the table that had the people who would buy his stuff, and told the sorting hat he wanted to go there. Later, he runs more with the Gryffindor crowd, regretting his choice, but when he makes friends with a first Year who tells him where to find some Adam Wood in the Forbidden Forest, he stops regretting it so much.

Robin has a very shady past, and she’s only at Hogwarts for a year before disappearing into the world. She has an odd type of magic, somewhat like pareseltoungue, that allows her to read coded and ancient languages with some studying (our girl still puts in a lot of effort though!) She reappears many years later during Luffy’s first (possibly second) year, and becomes the new history teacher (sorry professor Binns!) People find her scary and suspicious, but Luffy likes to talk to her after class, when she tells him history more like a story than a lesson! She’s very good at duplication magic.

 LUFFY. This boy. Where to start – he’s from a pureblood family, not that he cares, and has some serious magic talent – which he plans on using to travel the world and find the mysterious One Piece – a fabled artifact said to have one’s wishes granted. Luffy wants it to be free (his home life with Garp isn’t very good.) He has a couple famous brothers who have been through Hogwarts – Ace and Sabo, both Gryffindors and pretty big shots around Campus. No one knew they were brothers til Luffy busted into Gryfindor Dorms one night and looked for them. Luffy is exetremly good with nonverbal magic (something in this universe that will be elaborated on, as it features into Nami’s magic as well), not so much with verbal as the pronunciation trips him up. Potions is also hard and if it were not a required class he’d have been kicked out.

Will touch on Jimbe later once I figure him out

Now. Perhaps you are wondering – why do a bunch of kids have developed fighting abilities? Well – take a look at the plot.

This takes place not only in a Harry Potter setting, but in Harry’s own world as well. Meaning – Voldemort is rising, Harry’s still the chosen one, yadda yadda yadda. But do you honestly think that Voldemort is the only magical evil? That there isn’t a magical underworld not involved with his horrible schemes?

Cause there is one – and Luffy and crew are neck deep in it. While Harry and co. are off fighting Voldemort, Luffy is ‘sneaking’ around fighting big time criminals.

Imagine – this eleven year old child comes up to you, a big mob boss, and absolutely destroys you. That’s Luffy.

Underage Magic? You think Garp, head of something or other in the Ministry of Magic, is going to stop that from training his criminal grandsons to be the best Aurors they can be? He knows how to undo the spell (there must be something at Hogwarts that blocks the ministry from being informed of spell use during the school year!) and Luffy has been casting magic like it was second nature since he was real young. He’s taught it to his friends too!

 So plotwise, its basically the school reacting to the Straw Hats, who don’t seem to be friends but are, the odd noticings of what their doing while Canon plot goes on, and the inevitable suspicion from Harry.

But oh? What about the ship thing? What’s Franky Doing with that?

 Luffy is forever a pirate – and the sea is one magical thing I have yet to be seen explored in the Harry Potter Universe. Therefore – free realestate!!! Luffy’s going to be a magic pirate when he grows up, he’s been telling everyone this since he first met Shanks,  and maybe no one believes him now but it’ll happen! Magic Pirates!! Yay!!!

That’s all I have for now, so send me questions if you have any! I might make this into (another) drabble series, or maybe just one big one shot. We’ll see!!!

[seawolvesanddragons]

Alternate Avengers Timeline

So my friend and I were wishing the MCU had given us a more "Avengers as a team" storyline and then my hand slipped and this happened:

--tower shenanigans happened slowly following after NYC, but by Thor's return Tony has been living there full time since Malibu literally blew up and was part time there before hand anyway. As soon as he went full time, Bruce moved in.

--they were being called in on smaller scale missions, usually Steve plus the assassins, but often the science bros for their brains if Tony and Bruce agreed to, and even Iron Man when he agreed to.

--Steve is splitting his time between DC and the tower, so is Natasha since she's paired with Steve for most of his missions.

--Clint is almost full time avenger now: SHIELD needed someone in NYC anyway, and he could double with keeping an eye on Tony and Bruce when Natasha was with Steve. Also, he doesn't have a handler anymore since Phil, doesnt want any other, so this was the compromise. He likes it, the guys are cool, NYC missions are interesting, he still gets to go out with Steve and Natasha often, and he's closer to his sister Laura and her two kids (with one more on the way) - her husband died in battle of new York. Avengers excepting Natasha don't know about his sister and her family. He and Natasha have their special understanding. Its left ambiguous so that fans can interpret what they want.

--Winter soldier and dark world happen still as before, but the post credit scene of dark world is the avengers all arriving in London to help after Thor has already solved everything and are just sort of standing around uselessly after an epic entrance. Tony tells him and Jane to stop by the tower and offers Jane a job.

--age of ultron happens as it did but with better understanding between Tony and Steve and also more discussion about threats from space, Tony/Jarvis running surveillance for Bucky. Sam is basically being phased into Avengers. Rhodey is trying to get transferred cause "no way is the winged youngun beating me to the group" and Peitro lives dammit. Hulk still goes because I liked him in Ragnarok. So off to space, sorry bud.

--I think all the standalone movies can go as planned up till CW...civil war goes by and large the same, with key differences: Tony and Steve argue about the accords yes, but this avengers is far more cohesive then our timeline; they've been living and working together since 2013. The UN is withholding aid and info that could help the group learn more about the threat of whoever was behind Loki and Thor's vision from Age of Ultron (Thor keeps in touch with them; he and Jane still break up). Tony, who prioritizes this threat, is willing to sign the line in order to get the information. ("Its not like we can't just break the rules later Steve" ) but Steve thinks their earth based missions are more imprtant right now because theyre here, in the present, and the accords would tie their hands from doing any real good. They're trying to figure out a compromise, and yes tempers are running a bit short when the attack happens and Bucky is framed. Tony and the others immediately tell Steve to go (Natasha and Sam go with him as back up) while the others try to stall the military and un from arresting Bucky. A new deal is put on the table: sign the accords, and Bucky (and Wanda who is being unfairly demonized by them) get full immumity. Tony thinks this might work. He tries to get in touch with Steve to talk it through, but some black ops break through his and the other Avengers defensivsss and Tchallas attack keeps him from getting in contact. Steve, Sam, Bucky are arrested (Natasha gets away) and taken to SHIELD where they keep them separated from the team, and tell them Tony and the others already signed the accords. Steve doesn't believe them. What's his name is pulling his shit with Bucky, and before he can confer with Tony and the others, Steve and Sam have to break out, stop Bucky, and go on the run again. Before the leave, Steve sees Tony in an office with Ross - just enough to plant a seed of doubt in his mind.

They decide they need to go after whoever framed Bucky. Sam asks if they need to get the whole team in, but Steve knows getting this info on the Space Threat is also important. They can't sever all ties. Let Ross think the group was split and have Tony and Natasha try to work their magic on Ross to get the info. Discreet messages are sent out. We see Clint slipping away from Natasha , Rhodey, and Tony's meeting with Ross. Vision is distracted from watching Wanda (still placed on house arrest, which everyone is protesting. Also pietro has been off doing his own thing, travelling the world and hoping to find Hulk.) Sam tells Steve about Scott and a few strings are pulled by Hill to get him there. The mission: destroy the other super soldiers Bucky talked about. Ross catches wind and declares them vigilantes and orders the rest of the avengers after them. After a lot of arguing and Tony almost blowing Ross to bits (no one has forgotten what he did to Bruce) the final punch is pulled: full Immunity for the rogue Avengers, the info on Space threats, and the location of Bruce's Quinn jet. Just sign The accords. Its the only way out of this nightmare. The last one gets Tony. He wants Bruce back. They need to get to Steve and work this out, and they can't leave until someone signs the accords. So he does. Rhodes and Natasha follow suit. The first thing Ross does is order them to stop the others and bring them in. Tony remimds him of the deal and declares they have 36 hours to get Steve and the others to come in and work this out. After that, the accords can go into full affect. Ross gets even by telling Tchalla where Bucky is, and Tony, Vision and co have to go there to keep him from killing Bucky. Tony brings Peter because a) he needs a wild card, especially one whose webbing can get people to pause and b) he wants the kid associated with the Avengers before Ross goes after him. Peitro also stops by and goes with them to meet the others.

--the airport scene is a mess of communication - Steve needs to GO, before the super soldiers are awakened, but Tony needs him to LISTEN because things are spiraling. Tchalla gets tired of the talk and attacks, causing Wanda to hold him off. Vision incapacitates Wanda. Suddenly all hell breaks loose, and a full on fight breaks out. The avengers are torn into two. Tchalla is the one to nearly stop Bucky and Steve from escaping, until Tony knocks him out from behind. "Think Ross bought that whole pantomime?" "Seemed pretty real to me. You hit hard Tony" "walk it off Cap. You said something about more Russian evil you before?" "Yeah. You'll keep Ross off our back?" "Do my best. Good luck Cap." "I'll need it. And Tony? Thanks."

--Rhodey is injured trying to protect Wanda from Ross's men when they suddenly appear. Sam saves him.

--Tony and "Team Iron Man" are horrified by the underground prison. The plan is to break them out. Natasha tells Tony to go help Cap under the guise of trying to arrest him, because "you can't be here when they escape." Tony goes. Tchalla follows. The reveal happens and at first Tony is angry, is lashing out, and Steve is confused to (because Steve didn't know in this timeline) and torn between who to help, and Bucky just...lets the attack come. Steve tries to intervene but Tony blasts him to the side. Finally, Tony is ready for the killing blow - and he can't. He knows this face, it's been in his database for years now, searching for Steve's long lost best friend. He sees Rhodey in his mind, falling out of the sky. He hears his mother's voice. And he tears the gauntlet off, screaming in pain and heartache.

--tchalla and villain dudes scene stays.

--Tony and Steve finally get to talk everything out and figure out the best course of action. There's no way around it: the team has to split. They needed to be ready to fight the oncoming war as well as put out the current fires. Besides, half of the Avengers have been tossed in prison. So Steve will take his team (minus Scott, who ops for house arrest) and they'll go vigilante. Meanwhile, Tony and his folk stay on as the remaining official Avengers, and get the info they need. Steve gives Tony a burner phone, tells him to call if he ever needs help.

--Natasha has broken the others out of prison. Vision, Rhodey, Peitro are staying with Tony as Avengers. Steve, Sam, Natasha are going rogue, with Tchalla offering them Wakanda as an operating base if,needed. He also takes Bucky to help rehabilitate. Clint is taking Wanda to recover at his sisters farm, which Ross doesn't know about, to give her time to heal. When shes ready, they would join whoever needed them. Scott gives Tony Hank's contact to reach other and work together if needed.

--so basically the media, public, and Ross think the Avengers are fueding but really Tony and Steve are playing war on both sides.

--standalone movies since then stay the same, but Thor is pan, slightly more aware of the earth going ons, and tells Bruce about some of them in Ragnaroc. Stephan strange is ace. Also they expain why the mystic one has the time stone, and also throwaway line about how the Avengers would be better equipped for this till they broke up,

--Tony constantly trolls Ross

--Peter knows that secretly they all get along, but has to pretend like it really is Steve v Tony like every other civilian thinks it is. Ned is overjoyed when he learns otherwise.

--Spider-Man is also just full of subtle nods to the con the avengers are pulling on Ross. The party Tony is at when he rescues Peter shows Natasha and Sam disguised in the background. Peter gets a postcard from Brooklyn he puts on his wall post the ferry incident.

--thor calms Hulk down at some point in Ragnarok by referencing times in the tower when they all lived together.

--Infinity war comes. Hulk arrives with his news, Tony is literally about to call Steve when the attack happens. That's it, thwy're seperated for the rest of the fight once Tony gets on the spaceship.

-when Tony disappears, Rhodey and Hulk ask Peitro to tell them where Vision is with Wanda, because that secret was fooling no one. Also, the rogue Avengers have been secretly half living in the tower again for months now between missions; Peter knows each of them by name. Ross suspects but can't prove anything and he hates it)

--Avengers reunited, sans Tony and Thor!

--Tony's been compiling info on this new threat post civil war, as well as working on new tech to sneak to the rogues when he can; this all comes out as they head from NY to Wakanda. Scott doesn't have a role, as in the original, but Clint is there and he goes. Or maybe Clint somehow ends up in space after they are fighting off the ones attacking Wanda and Vision and is just wondering how he gets in progressively stupider situations with just a bow and arrows. Well, time to hide until he can figure out an escape plan. Somehow this ends with him ending up on the same place as Tony, Strange, Peter, and the Guardians, in the middle of their fight. It's kind of hilarious.

--Tony's dislike of Strange is explained as Tony knowing Strange refused to work on Rhodey's legs because it was too simple and boring a case. Strange has to prove he's changed.

--(btw, Avengers didn't interfere with Strange because the rogues where off on their own mission already and NY Avengers couldn't because of the accords. Had the ancient one not assured them long before they could hold their own, they would have broken the accords once they knew something hanky was going on. In Black Panther, the group just left and didn't really hear about it. You get a few references to their stay though. )

--the rest of Infinity War stays the same.

--Clint's niece stays alive and Natasha gets her; she's there when the spaceship returns and she is ready to fight Thanos

--time skip of six, eight months before they figure out how to reverse the snap. Pepper is pregnant. Harley is there because his family got snapped and Tony just keeps adopting kids ok? Movie generally stays the same but Natasha doesn't die, Tony comes up with literally any other plan and therefore doesn't die, Steve fucking stays

--back to everyone living in the tower together, the accords are ripped up and everyone gets to be an avenger again; Thor decides to travel with the guardians for a while to find a new planet for Asgard as Valkarie runs shit. Theres a shot near the end showing Peter, Clint's neice, Harley (who is working on a prototype iron man suit) and Shuri talking with Cassie hanging on to every word, foreshadowing the young Avengers.

-