#except more upsetting

[transthatmasc]

My brain keeps providing me with the outline for a trans Viktor pregnancy fic where he decides that the solution to him dying and being able to do nothing about it is to secretly give Jayce a child that can replace him even though it will surely kill him faster than his disease already is.

It would be body horror and angst and whump. There would NOT be a happy ending. Viktor’s discomfort with the constant reminder of his femininity as he grows a baby. The physical toll that it takes on his body as he is physically unable to eat enough to grow it. The feeling of it hollowing out his already brittle bones, sucking him dry for resources as he pours out his limited reserves away from trying to keep himself alive any longer. The isolation of doing it alone and without Jayce’s blessing, knowing full well that Jayce would never have had sex with him if he thought they weren’t on the same page about how dangerous it was for Viktor to have children.

Jayce does not figure out that Viktor is pregnant until he is so far along that there is nothing to do but hope the baby is viable before it kills Viktor. He beats himself up for not realizing sooner— for thinking it was just the illness ramping up. He quickly loses the energy for rage and instead shifts straight to grief, unable to enjoy the little time left he has with Viktor and the impending arrival of the child he has always wanted.

The baby is born very prematurely by emergency c section after Viktor’s lungs aren’t able to get enough oxygen for him or the baby. Viktor survives the birth but is simply unable to recover in any meaningful way from such an invasive surgery and passes away a couple days later. The baby is in the nicu for three weeks, born small and quiet, but eventually gets strong enough to breathe on its own and fuss when it’s hungry.

Jayce doesn’t know how to cope with the fact that he couldn’t convince Viktor that he was worth every second Jayce could possibly have with him. He doesn’t know how to cope with the constant reminder that Viktor loved him enough to give him a something to live for after he left but not enough to let him take care of him while he grew this final gift.

Jayce moves back in with his mom. He names his daughter Laska. She has golden eyes and little wisps of dark brown hair. Jayce thinks about killing himself but can’t waste the gift that Viktor has given him.

[aroaceleovaldez]

underappreciated Nico detail that I like - he seems to be an angry crier! very frequently he's angry when he cries and he cries when he's extremely angry. very AuDHD of him. emotional regulation sucks my guy and he's just going through it.

[obsessedoverwater]

Becoming a Knuxadow fan truly feels like I'm eating moldy bread and sometimes I occasionally get a piece that's only stale. If I'm lucky maybe it'll be mildew instead.

[pianokantzart]

:)

[beneathsilverstars]

u can do anything with loop… we only know how they act in two extremely specific contexts, outside of that loop could be so many different things…. thats why my modern au loop is Like That (has “everyone else is an npc” brain bc it’s the only way they could cope with not being able to help the people getting hurt around them. it’s just their role in the story, it’s impossible to change the script and it doesn’t matter anyway bc they’re not real! loop and their headmates are the only real people with real thoughts and feelings in the entire world ^^)

[b0nelessdoodles]

messed up my back and had to call out of work about it so have some doodles i forgot to post from a bit ago

[waitineedaname]

when I started orv I expected it to be a story where lots of main characters die, like i was coming at it as someone who's read homestuck, I fully expected a lot of major character death, I expected no one from that first subway car to survive. and then as I kept reading, it really struck me just how many people survived and how aside from kim dokja dying a dozen times, no one in the main party has died, and now I've realized that is extremely intentional. this is a story where a lot of people are supposed to die, it's a story that's supposed to force repeated sacrifice, and kim dokja looked at that story and went "absolutely the fuck not, that's not the story I want to tell" and pulled that burden of sacrifice onto himself over and over because he refuses to be part of a story where his friends die

[dailydegurechaff]

I feel like I should take some of the blame for this because of Marya Week

Should

I wouldn't use the word blame per se, that implies you've done something wrong. I think I'd perhaps say credit, bc you created a wonderful little event.

now, while I have you, go forth my dailydegu-ers. follow @embroideredequations

[frogwen]

hiiiiii ❤️‍🔥 thank you @mousepal for tagging me! the game is i pick 4 of my favorite characters and then you vote on which you most connect with me 👍

hopefully even if you dont recognize the character, you still get the vibe. and im realizing belatedly that the only vibe is "guy who suffers" 💀 buuuuut this was genuinely fun to think about, so plz give it a try and tag or dm me if you make one too so i can see and vote :3

anyone, everyone @steevejr @foolishbeanwoman @nineofswords @eleventeenthealbum @wawek @nutongzhi @buttcheek2 @lycheeboy (sid mini bracket ? 😳) @archdemoning @twoticky @misevolimo @kirby97 @handweavers OR IF YOU SEE THIS ON YOUR DASH- IM TAGGING YOU. tumblr wont let me edit poll posts so this is the end of personal invitations lmao

[grandwretch]

for the millionth fucking time, the difference between the princesses and the party is so obvious unless you're being pedantic

"We're not so different, you and I," is such a bullshit trope when one side is trying to wipe out existence itself

like yes the party are still main characters and inherently selfish but you know what the real difference is? the reason why the party can't be the same as the princesses?

because they love people who aren't.

thats the whole point. ylfa would never want to erase her grandmother. pinocchio would never want to erase his father. rosamund is the only character who doesn't have another character of her story that she would do anything for, but her whole story is about wanting and searching for that kind of love.

the princesses have people they loved, sure, but they don't care about trying to save them. for all cinderella is upset about her mother, she'd rather erase her from existence than try to save her, because her nihilism has overwhelmed her love. snow white is alone. rapunzel is alone. la bête is alone. they may have loved, once, but now all they care about is erasing their pain.

and thats understandable, and I think everyone who has dealt with trauma and abuse has a phase where they have to grapple with that kind of numbness, but I think the whole point of the story is that eventually you have to move past that

I believe, ultimately, love will be what inspires mira and hopefully elody to turn away from the daughters of the crown. because they have people they love in these worlds, and even their memories are worth preserving.

[beeprich]

genuinely lamenting the lost relationship between mike hanlon and his parents in every IT adaptation

[kimtaegis]

🌧️

[toskarin]

there are too many navels drawn like wounds these days. haunting

[halffizzbin]

I've been watching old Project Runway episodes and my take is: whatever they were paying the fat models to participate in the "real woman" challenges just so the contestants could throw dramatic fits over how much they despise fat bodies? It was not enough.

[cluescorner]

It's been an insane week because why tf am I missing Agent Jon (no H) Schloeder right now. Please I just need a silly dude who is also trying so hard to be a good person. Please his sister just died and I wanna be his friend please

[sweetnnaivete]

unfortunately my roman empire is the star wars sequels because what a load of garbage that could’ve been avoided if the people in charge of the films actually gave a shit. and it’s a problem that honestly i notice happening more and more to franchises these days :/ the disneyfication of everything is starting to get to me because GOD