#everything on a set has purpose so I just thought it was really interesting they placed that between them of all places with how it looks

[daisyssousa]

daisy/sousa foreshadowing (1/?) ↳ first meeting foreshadowed their endgame with a ship/missile like shape resembling the zephyr sailing through the stars in the background, they would later spearhead a mission in space together. the ripples on the sides also resemble the moment sousa is pulled out of his own time aboard the zephyr after he decides to stay with daisy.

@giftober 2023 | day one - first meeting

[peapod20001]

I actually do have very complex thoughts about many different things, it’s just a bit challenging to connect the inner voice to the outer voice sometimes </3

[sammakesart]

Castles in the Fade, or What Was the Point of the Veil Anyway

Something that will now haunt me until the end of time is why was the concept of the Veil ever introduced into this series.

We’ve been hearing about it since the very first game. There’s a codex entry about tears in the Veil in Origins. Tamlen mentions a thin spot in the Veil if you play a Dalish elf. Sandal has a prophecy in Dragon Age 2: “One day the magic will come back—all of it. Everyone will be just like they were. The shadows will part and the skies will open wide. When he rises, everyone will see.” Admittedly, this is just one line said by a character who often says odd things, but it hinted to the fact they were planning to do something with the Veil from the very beginning. The state of the Veil is repeatedly brought up. It all had to mean something! Or so I thought. 

When I saw “The Dread Wolf Rises” quest in Veilguard, I said, “Oh, here we go!” The Veil is coming down, magic is coming back, and it’s going to set up such an interesting story for the next game. 

Alas, no. 

I hadn’t really enjoyed my time playing Veilguard up until this point. It felt like the game was ducking and dodging every bit of world building and lore that could possibly bring nuance or complexity to the story. Every returning character or faction was a cardboard cutout of themself. They shoved Solas is a time-out box and gave him nothing to do. They refused to let him have any impact or influence on the story when he had been set up to be our main antagonist back in Trespasser. This game used to be called Dreadwolf! And while we learn about his past… we never talk to him about it. In the present, he’s in stasis.

Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain are our villains. And they are your typical evil for evil’s sake villains. They are mad, bad, and only as dangerous as the narrative will allow as to not give Rook and co too much trouble. They are surprisingly patient while Rook fixes all their companions’ problems… until Elgar’nan moves the moon to cause an eclipse. A vital component in making his own lyrium dagger. For some reason. This guy can move a satellite!? And he just let Rook walk away in previous encounters… twice. Ok. Sure.

The Evil Duo need their own dagger ostensibly to tear down the Veil, because they want to unleash the full force of the Blight onto the world. Because they are evil. And they were thwarted last time they tried to Blight the entire world. Why do they think Blighting the world is a good idea? What’s the point of ruling a world if everyone is dead? I guess they haven’t thought that through, because of the madness and the evilness.

Ok, I thought. Perhaps the gods will be the one to tear down the Veil. Or maybe we’ll have a choice to let Solas do it his way before they can, which will be less chaotic and less full of Blight. Because the Veil has to be coming down one way or another? Why introduce the concept of the Veil, especially a Veil that has been thinning and failing since the series began, if it’s just going to… stay.

There is a principle in storytelling called Chekov’s gun. If something is mentioned in a story, it must have a purpose. If you keeping mentioning that gun hanging on the wall over the fireplace, it’s because at some point in the story, someone is going to take it down and use it. The Veil felt like Chekov’s gun to me. Chekov’s Veil, if you will. It’s been here from the beginning of our tale, the spectre hanging over our protagonists’ heads for multiple games.

The Veil has been a character unto itself. It was the central focus of the third game, and its dissolution was set up to be the core conflict of the fourth game. We learn everything we thought we knew about the Veil was a lie. It was not created by the Maker to separate the Fade from this world because of jealous spirits, it was created by a guy named Solas to trap the elven gods and the Blight from destroying the world. Also, the elven gods were never gods, and they are also evil.

This reveal will surely throw the Andrastian religion into chaos! This puts the very existence of the Maker into question! The Evanuris are a lie; it’s only fair Catholicism—oh, I mean—the Chantry is a lie too. We briefly touch on that in Veilguard… then it is quietly discarded. Religious crisis averted.

But I digress.

When the title of the fourth game was changed from Dreadwolf to Veilguard, I started to see the writing on the wall. Still, I held out hope the Veil would have some greater purpose in the story. That its introduction as a concept was for a reason. That something in this world would change.

Instead, from the get-go, the question of the Veil is no question at all. We only get Solas and Varric making oblique or catastrophizing statements about it. Solas says little beyond he has a plan. If I ever wanted to hear a villain monologue about their plan, it was now! Varric, on the other hand, decries Solas’s plan. He warns that should the Veil fall, it will destroy the world and drown it in demons. And that’s that.

We never really learn why Solas wants to tear the Veil down, or why he thinks it will help anyone. “The Veil is a wound inflicted upon this world. It must be healed,” he says. And that’s basically all he says about it in Veilguard. In Inquisition and Trespasser, we learn it took the immortality from the elves. It cut most of magic off from the world. Spirits are trapped and are being corrupted into demons, and most of what we know about spirits and demons is wrong. There are ancient elves possibly asleep? That part is left vague, but ancient elves are still about. We meet some in Mythal’s temple. There seems to have been some merit in bringing it down, because elves were flocking to Solas’s cause at the end of Trespasser. He had agents working for him already. What do they know that we don’t know?

Apparently nothing, because by the time Veilguard rolls around, there are no mention of agents. He is working alone. His only motivation now seems to be he’s too deep in his sunk-cost fallacy. The Veil is unnatural, so it must be removed—consequences be damned. We are never given any reason to think Solas has a leg to stand on in his pursuit of tearing down the Veil. We never hear any kind of counter argument from anyone, not even Solas, as to why the Veil should come down. We are only told it will destroy the world. It will drown the world in demons. This is all Solas’s fault.

There is no nuance. No complexity. No moral quandary to mull over. The game gives us vague warnings with no explanation as to what exactly is so world-annihilating about the Veil coming down. We must take Varric’s word at face value. We’re the heroes; Solas is the villain. Stop him.

It makes me wonder why Solas was ever a companion in Inquisition, let alone a romance option. Solas was presented to us as a complicated character in Inquisition. We had the potential throughout the game to make him see the value of this world, to help him realize he was wrong about it. “We aren’t even people to you,” the Inquisitor says in Trespasser. Solas replies, “Not at first. You showed me that I was wrong...again.” He began the third game viewing the world as tranquil, seeing the people in it as nothing more than figments in a nightmare, just as we saw our companions in the In Hushed Whispers quest. He ends the game having made friends, having recognized he was mistaken. He might have even fallen in love. (Or he may still seen no merit in this world if the Inquisitor antagonized him the entirety of their time together.) But something makes him continue with his plan to tear down the Veil, despite recognizing this world is real. He must know something we don’t. Something we’ll learn about in the next game.

We’ve been hearing about the Veil for three games now. We’ve set up our complex antivillain for the next installment, and he’s going to tear the Veil down. We swear to stop him or save him. But it has to be more complex than that. It can’t be so straightforward. Uncomplicated. Simple. Boring. Right? Right?

Nope. He really is just the villain, mustache-twirling and all. He apparently had no greater motivation, no as of yet unrevealed knowledge that would put this whole Veil thing into a new context. It was really as simple as the Veil falling will destroy the world, so Solas must be stopped. There is no new information that is revealed which makes us question what we are doing. Solas is never given any nuance or complexity to his actions. Nuance and complexity have actively been taken away. Both him and the Veil are looking like they are the worst things to be in a story: pointless. Why introduce the Veil if it’s just going to remain unchanged? Why introduce a character like Solas, bother humanizing him (for lack of a better term), giving us his backstory, setting him up as a cunning antagonist, only to make him look stupid, then put him on a shelf until the last ten minutes of your game?

Solas was the trickster archetype of this tale. He was our version of Loki from Norse mythology. What is the role of the trickster archetype? To challenge the status quo. To bring about events of extreme change, like say, the tearing down of a Veil that holds back all of magic. Loki is a huge contributing factor in Ragnarök. Through his manipulation, he causes the death of the beloved god, Baldr. This ushers in a long winter, which signifies the beginning of the end. Loki is imprisoned for this crime. When the final battle between gods and giants begins, the sun and moon are swallowed, plunging the earth into darkness. The earth shakes and Loki is freed to fight on the side of the giants. The world burns in raw chaos, falls beneath the sea, and is reborn. The world is remade, and a new realm of the gods and a new, better earth is formed.

It really felt like this was the setup they were going for. Solas causes the death of Mythal, and this is his catalyst for creating the Veil, which ushers in a world without magic. This could be seen as equivalent to the long winter. Solas falls asleep, trapped in dreams. He wakes and sets in motion bringing about the apocalypse. It’s not a perfect one to one, but it’s there if you squint. We have a war against the gods in Veilguard. I was expecting a few remaining Titans to wake and join the fight. But we don’t get any of that. There is a final battle, but it does not end in the end of the world. Or a better world. It just ends, and everything is the same.

It seems our trickster god caused his apocalypse thousands of years before our story started, when he created the Veil. His role in this tale was over before ours began, and he really is just some relic from a long-past age. He has no role, no purpose in this story. He is here to be thwarted. He is no Loki at all.

If you can’t tell, I wanted the Veil to come down. Did I think the Veil coming down would be painless? Have no negative consequences? No. Of course not. But keeping it up has negative consequences too. And it made for an interesting story. Or at least it could have. But we never explore that. The game presents no counter argument to having the Veil stay up, which, again, begs the question: what was the point of introducing the concept of the Veil at all?

Did I think the Veil coming down was actually the best solution to help Thedas become a better place? I don’t know, and I never will, because the game never argues for it one way or another. It just tells you to want it in place and to stop asking questions. In real life, a catastrophic event is not the best way to solve any of the world’s problems. But this is the realm of fiction. We have gods and monsters, magic and myth. We have introduced the status quo of Thedas, recognized it needs to change, then our trickster god appears ready to fulfill his role in the narrative. 

Instead, it all comes to nothing.

I got to the end of Veilguard… and everything was more or less the same as it was at the start of Origins. Veilguard actually tries its hardest to pretend any previously mentioned problems don’t exist, so of course the Veil coming down has no merit. There are no problems to solve in this world, apparently. Solas is just stuck in the past and can’t get with the times. Silly Solas.

The Veil isn’t even a permanent solution. It wasn’t to begin with. It was some duct tape wrapped around a broken pipe, and we’ve just slapped an extra piece of tape on it. It’s still leaking. It is still unnatural, and will fall eventually one way or another. Large amounts of bloodshed weaken it, so I guess Thedas better achieve world peace real quick to avoid any battles. There were seven super-powered mages holding it together… now there is just one. Ironically, the Veil was going to fall after two more Blights anyway. The Wardens were doing Solas’s work for him! It would also have released the full force of the Blight at that time… which Solas was trying to avoid, I presume.

It feels like keeping the Veil up just pushed a big problem onto Thedas’ future generations. We’ll keep slapping bandaids on it until it all falls apart. Someone else can deal with the fallout, but we’ll be dead by then, so who cares.

Primarily, I wanted the Veil to come down from a storytelling perspective. The Veil was an interesting concept and I wanted the story to do something interesting with it. Conflict is what makes stories stories and the Veil coming down could create so much compelling and complex conflict. And the Fade is weird, and I like weird. Stories are also about change, and I wanted to see Thedas change. Yet, Veilguard is over, and barely anything has changed. Instead of magic coming back being a conflict for the next game, they went with Fantasy Illuminati. Oh.

The Veil turned out to be a nothing-burger, and no problems in this world are even close to being solved. Slavery is still rampant in Tevinter. The elven people are still oppressed everywhere. Mages have no more rights in the South than they did in Origins. Spirits are still trapped and being corrupted. The Calling still exists, though might be different somehow now? They don’t really get into that. The Chantry’s validity is still not allowed to be questioned. The Blight still exists in some form, but again it’s vague. Oh, and we learn the dwarves have been gravely wronged, and the Titans are still tranquil. At least if you redeem Solas and a romanced Lavellan joins him, they can work together on healing the Blight and helping the Titans. Oh, good. One problem is being acknowledged and some action will be taken. Offscreen. Hurray? Solas doesn’t have a really great track record of fixing problems, so Lavellan is definitely going to need to be there to make sure he doesn’t fuck it up.

For some reason, this game seemed terrified of letting us think about anything for more than two seconds. It shied away from complexity or nuance at every turn. The game is called The Veilguard—ironically, that word is never uttered in the game—but we are given no real motive for guarding the Veil. We’re unquestionably the hero. The villains are uncomplicatedly evil. Save the world… never wonder what you are doing or why.

I wanted the game to make me question if the Veil staying up or coming down was the right choice. I needed to be given a real counter argument. Convince me the alternative would actually be better or worse, because as I mentioned… things suck quite a bit in Thedas already for a lot of people right now. Let the Veil’s fate be a difficult choice to make. If the conflict cannot be what to do about the Veil, it should be am I doing the right thing about the Veil. If the heart of your game is so thin on motive, everything else falls apart around it.

I hoped they were setting up a complex, Thedas-sized existential conflict for this game in Trespasser, but no. I wanted something to happen, but nothing did. 

I want to feel challenged and changed by a story, not left feeling empty. I’m tired of superficial entertainment. I want to sink my teeth into a narrative that doesn’t paint the world in broad strokes of black and white, good and evil, heroes and villains.

Ultimately, I think my issue is why even introduce a concept like The Veil if you’re not going to do anything interesting with it. Or anything at all. What I thought was Chekov’s Veil turned out to just be a MacGuffin. And that’s disappointing.

[avelera]

I don't think Jayce was ever the one who was against Hextech weapons. I think that was always Viktor's side of the partnership, and I think this for a few reasons:

1 ) Jayce comes from a family of tool makers. Weapons are tools. Jayce's earliest drawings of himself as a mage is him holding a magical hammer. I don't think Jayce set out to make magical weapons but I think he was always open to the idea as that drawing shows us.

2 ) Viktor comes from the undercity, which no matter how you look at when he would have left it for Piltover, was often damaged and harassed by armed Enforcers. Just based on his upbringing, Viktor would be very aware of the fact that any weapons made for Piltover will almost certainly be put in the hands of Enforcers and those will be used against people in the undercity. Jayce does not have this social awareness. I don't think Jayce was at all malicious, just naive,. According to Caitlyn, he had zero political interest before becoming a Councilor and really everything he knew or thought about the undercity came from his partnership and love for Viktor.

3 ) Jayce is genuinely torn on the need for Hextech weapons because again, this isn't a deeply held belief for him in S1, this is him being supportive of Viktor's vision for their shared dream.

Jayce let Viktor be the moral guide for something he didn't really have a strong feeling about one way or the other. This is why he's so torn in S1 when it seems like they might actually need Hextech weapons in Piltover to survive against a Shimmer-armed undercity (in a classic theme of arms race escalation and all it entails that permeates the show). The narrative demonstrates though that this is Jayce's naiveté at play to think the weapons could be used only against their intended targets. Weapons once made will always be used, including against children. Viktor already has this awareness that weapons will be used against the undercity, Jayce gains it through the attack on the Shimmer factory and the death of a child bystander who looks like Viktor. To Mel's credit, she also urges caution and backpedals on her own desire for Hextech weapons in a bid to deescalate the conflict.

4 ) In S2 Act 1, Jayce is all-in on Viktor's vision for Hextech, because he's mourning Viktor who is non-responsive in the Hex cocoon and close to death. Mel, who in 1.09 realized that Jayce and Piltover matter more to her than her mother's approval, also stands up against Hextech weapons.

5 ) But, and this is critical, Jayce has always fundamentally seen Hextech as a tool that can be used for many purposes. That's why when the situation escalates, he pushes back on Hextech weapons on a broader scale, but he is willing to bend enough to make weapons for Caitlyn and her strike team, because he loves Caitlyn and he sees this as a defensive tool to keep her safe, in my opinion, and as an alternative to a war that would be worse.

This is critical to note because Jayce doesn't have an iron spine when it comes to resisting Hextech weapons because it's not his deeply held philosophical belief the way it is for Viktor. It is a received belief that he holds to honor Viktor, out of love for him, and that can be swayed if the specter of protecting another loved one arises. Jayce is wildly conflicted about this, I believe, based on his expression in the forge after he makes Caitlyn's gun, but this is a man who cannot bear the thought of losing another loved one after everything he has gone through.

Hextech was always about love for Jayce, not philosophy, because he is not ideologically driven and never has been, it was always Viktor's ideals he was supporting and he would never fight as hard on that point as Viktor would as a result.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk ;P

[snakewithawitchhat]

Bill Headcanons

I have enough of these to fill up my guts whatever that means

Includes: Normal, readerxbill platonic, readerxbill romantic, freaky stuff he into

Normal

He definitely said skibidi once because he had no idea what it meant or where it came from

He would probably honest to god enjoy interacting with an iPad kid because he thinks they're fucking funny

Tea person over coffee

Probably reads books on the randomest subjects. Mostly they all have human psychology in common, though. Or anatomy.

His favorite kids movie is Wreck It Ralph, favorite adult movie is Shawn of The Dead (He doesn't believe British people are actually real and finds the movie funny), favorite horror movie is probably something really obscure and is just plain goreporn or something like that.

(In my opinion) I feel like if he had a more anthropomorphic form (legs and arms and body) it would probably be something VERY weird core or something like that. Like, extra limbs, weird ass colors, and random effects. He'd probably keep the triangle imagery, though.

Would definitely just say random ass shit to freak people out

He has a thing for teeth. Not, like, a weird thing or a sex thing. He just really thinks they're cool.

If he had an iPad... he'd spend all day either being your standard reddit user or an iPad kid.

Probably like King from The Owl House sometimes.

Speaking of TOH, he met The Collector once. He thought the kid was neat and played a few games of chess with him before leaving. Probably one of the inspirations for The Collector's insaneness

He also met The Core from Amphibia. Or at least knew the core existed.

His favorite human color is either red, yellow, or orange. It's really everything on the hot side of the color wheel tbh.

Platonic X reader

Dream invasion time-- He would SO rummage through your mind if you made a deal with him.

If you pissed him off, he'd probably jab a fork in your arm while possessing you. He wouldn't be as insane as he was with Stanford's body, though. He wants yours to work properly.

Dream demon or not, he probably had a Drea- NIGHTMARE... it was SO a nightmare... about having more fun with you if you built the portal.

Would be touchy. Not in a weird way (if you ask, he'll stop) but he'll just, like, pat your shoulder or something like that.

If Weirdmageddon 2 happens he is SO finding you and inviting you to his party. You're coming, too. You don't got a choice. Womp womp.

If one of his friends were to eat you, he'd probably be disappointed as all hell, but it really depends on how close you are with him. Besties? He'd kill that monster and resurrect you with the parts left. Just acquaintances? Who are you again?

Would still possess you even after he gets a physical form. (he likes to prank you)

Romantic X reader

Clingy bastard. If your insert is mortal, he'll be by your side 24/7 if Weirdmageddon is happening. Even if your insert ISN'T mortal.

Would be even MORE touchy.

He'd set up boundaries and be clear with his own while probably ignoring yours. (he isn't a great partner)

It's probably a toxic one-sided relationship at first. Bill is NOT a good person at ALL. He always had a goal in mind. He sees his romantic interest of you as a little thing that just ALSO happened.

Probably gets flustered by affection really easily if you're the one showing it.

He won't know much about human affections, so you'll probably have to show him the ropes.

Before you do THAT, though, he'll probably just bite you (with his freaky fucking eyeball mouth thing). Not even as a sexual or possessive thing. He just likes to bite you. It's like an awkward thing he can't control. Get too close and he can feel your warmth? Bite. Bite. BITE. It's not light stuff, though. It's always hard enough to draw blood. Purposeful or not. (It's not on purpose)

He doesn't get JEALOUS, but he does get a little insecure if you start getting infatuated with someone else.

If you're hurt from someone, you BEST know he's overprotective as fuck. Your puny mortal body is pathetic, but if you lose it, he loses you, too.

You aren't aging ever again. You aren't DYING ever again. No. He won't let you die ever. Body is giving out? Here's a new one. Forgetting...? No, he'll plant more memories in your mind. He's too late and you're dead...? No you aren't... You'll always be conscious. Whether your body is rotting around your mind or not.

Sex junk

Sadist. 100% all the way. Not even light things, like slaps. No, if you consent, he will full on break your bones.

He doesn't feel sexual gratification like humans do, so it's more of just something he'll do to either please or displease you. Whichever one, it's almost always about how you feel.

He doesn't have a dick, so you'll be on the receiving end always. Unless you REALLY want to give.

He has a giant eyeball on him. He definitely likes to watch.

Always tops because there isn't much you can do to dominate him. He'll try to let you if you really wanna, but it probably won't be the easiest.

Blood kink. That's it. He thinks it's so pretty on you. Especially if it's yours.

[thequietkid-moonie]

Trying to let their darling be happy with someone else

[ HEADCANONS ] [ Aventurine, Hanako, Nagisa, Ishida ]

[ Honkai Star Rail ] [ Toilet Bound Hanako-kun ] [ Assassination Classroom ] [ A silent voice ]

⚠️ Yandere, I don't support nor try to romanticize this toxic behaivor, is just for entretaiment

This is a bittersweer prompt, is like the yanderes trying to leave their darling free for their darling's sake, I thought it would be interesting to explore this posibility <3

Aaaalsoooo im writing for two yanderes I haven't wrote before! I wish you like them !!

Aventurine

Aventurine's love is an intense and burning feeling, it consumes him and make him desperate but at the same time give him a purpose and makes him keep going, he is well aware of his feelings and even knowing how unhealthy they can be but they consume him slowly so he can't really ignore them

As his feelings slowly grow there is nothing more Aventurine loves more than just watch you be yourself, interact with others and just have fun, he spend quite some time watching you from afar before deciding to get close to you, using his charm and flirtatious attitude to try to win your heart

He is not only aware of his feeling but also of yours, he wants so desperately for you to love him that he just can't not try to read you to see if he even has a chance, thats why if you seem interested in someone else he will notice, it will depend a little in how obvious you are but still he is smart enough to catch the hints. Even if he gets to know pretty quick he will be in denial for a while, he doesn't want to admit that you are in love with someone else but he can see you looking at that other person with love

Even if he just seems a little grumpy or try to avoid the topic with a smile in the inside he is a complete mess, going from desperately trying to deny that you like someone else to crying his heart out, repeating himself that of course you will love someone else since he doesn't deserve you, it will even reach the point where he just hates that person for stealing your attention from him

Insolated in the darkness of his room, Aventurine end up making a lot of plans and backup plans to take you away from that person and to win your affection, with his luck everything will go the way he wants it, he make up his mind, losing himself in the intensity of his feelings and the need of your love

Aventurine put in action his plan, trying to be more and more close to you, being extra friendly with you in hopes that you just forget about that worthless nobody and better look at him, while in the shadows he tries to put more and more obstacles in that person's way, trying really hard to set you two apart

But even after all his efforts Aventurine just freeze the moment he sees the two of you interacting, paying close attention of how you act, to those suble hints of your love, realicing how beautiful you truly are when you are in love but also about the fact that you haven't acted that way with him. After this Aventurine will probably watch you interact with that person for a while from the shadows, blessing himself with your beauty and precence but also torturing himself with the display of you affection towards someone else, slowly growing more and more envy and heart-broken

At the end, Aventurine decides that forcing you to stay with him when you love someone else would be unfair, he will keep trying to win your heart but will try really hard to set you free, even if he feels like his entire being is breaking and put him in an even worst state, if your feelings for that other person are corresponded then he will try really hard to let you be happy with that person

Hanako

It was really foolish of his part to fall in love with a human and Hanako knew it, but is not like he could stopped himself, ever since he have noticed you around the school you catched his attention, what lead him to slowly follow you and know more and more about you

For him it was just matter of time to become fascinated by you, he wanted to be close to you, to talk to you, he wanted to be selfish for once and be with you, to never leave your side, but no matter how much he wished for it he was still a supernatural, he had to ask for Yashiro's help to even be able to meet you in person, using the excuse of making your wish come true just to be able to have the excuse to glue himself to your side

Hanako has a stalker behaivor during school day, following you around all the time he can and just watching go with your day, sometimes even appearing just with the excuse to mess with you while in reality he is just following his burning desire to be as close as you as posible

It can be that Hanako just noticed that you have feelings for someone else when witnessing it by just following you around or that even the wish you went to ask for to him was related to that love, either way the realization makes him freeze in place and stare at you, for him is like the time has stoped just to dragg him to the cruel reality, a cruel reminder of his position, he is a supernatural, you two couldn't be together because he is already dead

Hanako tries to play off and put a teasing smile to cover up what he really feels, still when he finally finds out an excuse he quickly say it before leaving, and you wont be able to find him for days because he is just too heart broken to face you, he loves you, he want to be with you, he want you to love him too, but that is not going to happen, and he feels like an idiot for it

He spend quite some time reproaching himself for being so idiotic to fall in love, as intense of his feeling are for you is his now self hate for even falling in love. Hanako spend several days in his little cycle of despair, torturing himself with reproachings and constant reminders that this will never be, not when he is a not only a supernatural but also a murderer, why would you even love someone like him? it was just too idiotic of himself

Once he feels ready to face you again is when he finally have make up his mind that he just have to forget about what he fell for you because you deserve to have a great and long life, you doesn't have to lose your life like he did (let alone for his own selfishness), he have make it up in his mind that he will leave you alone to be happy with that other person, but the moment he sees you again, he sees you worried about his sudden disappearance and how you being worring for him for all this days that plan of leaving you be happy with someone else just broke under the weight of his feelings, he just loves you too much to lose you, he doesn't want to

Nagisa Shiota

Being in Class 3E makes every feel bad and unworthy, like idiots, and Nagisa isn't the exception, adding that failure feeling to his already bad self-esteem just make him feel even more unworthy of his darling, he is just a worthless no one while his darling is someone he look up to, someone more beautiful and valuable

Even if you were at class 3E Nagisa doesn't have the strength to talk to his darling, he just limits himself to watch you from afar, tortured by the inmense love that make him wish to just be able to at least talk to you, if only you look at him at least for a brief moment, but is also a constant remainder of how unworthy he is

Nagisa is incredibly smart and perceptive, for him is so easy to read thought his darling for how much attention he puts in you, he is able to be so close to you without being detected that he just memorized everything about you, so its not so dificult for him to notice that you have feelings for someone else but he feels like breaking down when he finds out, he knew he could never have a chance with you, he is nothing but the shadow of his mother anyways, and yet, deep down, he hoped that one day he could be able to have an oportunity, a really small ray of hope that kept him going, but now is gone

Even when Nagisa tell himself that he understand that you would love someone else that doesn't stop him from being in the edge and incredibly heartbroken, but also angry, he doesn't exactly know to who or what he is angry at but he is. Nagisa is clearly affected by this but wants nothing more than your happiness, so if your happiness is with someone else he will make sure that person is worthy of you, stalking the person you like to make sure they are good enough, the problem is that his anger just make him try really hard to find any reason of why that person is unworthy, anything can help (also, the more he trains in Class 3E the more confidence he gains, even if he still sees himself as unworthy he at least is better than that idiot)

At the end it would be incredibly dificult for someone to make him a good impression to let them be deserving of your affection, Nagisa doesn't even realice how possesive he can be and just cover up with the excuse of no one being worthy. However, this is a little tricky, because if he sees that this person makes you truly happy he will have a mental breakdown for the preasure of being stuck between wanting you to be happy and the others being unworthy, but in this way there are higher chances that he will accept his defeat (but will continue to stalk you two, waiting for that idiot's first mistake to take them away)

However, if the case is that you two are already friends then he will be less willing to let you go, it have took so much efforts to just even become your friend (and him to accept it since he stills feels quite unworthy) to just lose it for some idiot that wants to get in his way, since he slowly wins more confidence with the training and you have already accepted him in your life then he feels ready to fight for what he have with you now

Shoya Ishida

Despite the fact that Ishida is quite dependent of his darling he limits and hold back himself a lot, he feels unworthy and is so afraid that you would think as bad as he thinks of himself that he prefers to dont be close to you, but at the end, if you two end up being friends he will be watching over his every single move to make sure he doesn't make any mistake

For Ishida is incredibly dificult to really tell what his darling is feeling, he is constantly in the edge of his nervousness and anxiety and can easily misundestand things for the bad, you have to be clear with him, thats also why if you are interested in someone else it will take him a long time to understand it, as unworthy as he feels deep down he still wishes for you to see him in a good light, the thought of you loving someone else or even not giving him even the chance have cross his mind a few times but the moment he finally realice that you actually have feelings for someone else is going to break him completely

He is going to be a complete mess the moment he sees that you actually have feeling for someone else, after the initial shock Ishida will fall into a really bad depresive episode, his mind going around the idea that of course you will love someone else, why would you love an idiot like him? he haven't forgiven himself for what he have done to Shouko so of course he doesn't deserve to be happy with the person he loves, you'll probably think that he is a monster too when you find out what he have done

His mind goes back an forth between the self depracation and the constant reminder that he doesn't deserve you, you don't deserve to be stuck with someone like him after all. Its going to take a lot of efforts and even help from his friends to help him get out of this state, but even when he calms down the self-hate is back, and thanks to that he will not be able to even look at you because he wants you to be happy, wich he now believes isn't with him

But if you two are already friends the problem comes when you show that you were worried too, if you come to him asking if he is alright or just expressing relief or even happiness to finally see him again then his feelings will get over him again, this is what he truly wants, he wants your comfort and reasurance, and now that you are giving it to him Ishida can't just let you go like that, he doesn't want to lose this

If you show genuine and positive feelings for him, showing him that you truly care he will practically forget about the idea of leaving you go and go back to the feeling of wanting your forgiveness and aproval, but since there is someone who is treaten to take away, his precious ray of hope then he will try more and more to be of your liking, to make you look at him and love him instead of that other person

[effloradox]

Means To An End

pairings: hitachiin twins x gn!reader, ohshc x gn!reader

summary: tensions are running high in the host club when the twins start to fight over a comment made by Haruhi. as their best friend, everyone expects you to have the answers but when you failed to notice any tension between the two of them, you’re left wondering if you don’t know them as well as you thought.

notes: set during episode 1.05 (the twins fight), works in the same verse as We Want You Here but is fine as a stand-alone fic too

word count: 2.2k

There’s trouble in the air. You’d say you can smell it, but with all the rose bouquets scattered around Music Room 3 it’s hard to get away from the floral smells that all your friends, hosts or otherwise, are perpetually laced with. Yesterday had been normal as far as you could tell, even if you had left school early for an appointment, but when the twins’ car had arrived at your home to pick you up to take you to school you’d been surprised to see them sporting new hair colours.

“Should I be worried about that?” The two of them raised an eyebrow in unison before your eyes drifted up to their hair. You couldn’t deny that the blue and the pink suited them really well but they’d never expressed an interest in dyeing their hair before. Not to mention how much their mother loves their natural hair colour. To dye it on a whim with no deeper purpose would be seen as a crime in her eyes. Yuzuha Hitachiin is not a woman to cross, you don’t want to think about the arguments had over this new development in the twin’s appearance. They exchange one more glance between themselves before Kaoru finally answers your question.

“It’s a means to an end.” You take a few moments to mull over the vagueness of his words, staring hard at the blue, before replying.

“Am I going to be dragged into the middle of it?”

“We’d prefer it if you didn’t.” At Hikaru’s words, the tension in the car seems to evaporate and you finally relax into your seat. You drop your bag onto the seat next to you, smoothing a crease in your uniform.

“Suits me just fine.” The rest of the journey is filled with small talk and petty gossip, just the way you like to spend your morning journey to Ouran. By the time the three of you have arrived at school you’re almost used to their new looks.

It takes until your lunch period for you to actually find out the reason for the twins’ weird behaviour. Your involvement in various clubs and extracurriculars had kept you busy and away from your friends aside from shared classes where you’d been too busy studying for upcoming exams to pay attention to your idiotic best friends. You finally had a moment of peace on your way to the dining hall when a commotion drew your attention. The pink and blue hair makes it incredibly easy to identify the twins and you can only watch in mild horror at the food fight that has broken out between the two of them. You’d been more than content to turn on your heel and head back where you came from when a foreign pair of arms grab you, pulling you down a corridor not far from the dining hall.

“I demand you tell me what’s going on with those shady twins!” It takes you a few beats to realise that it’s Tamaki that pulled you away. You’re more than used to being manhandled by the twins but Tamaki doesn’t seem like the type to do so unprompted to anyone but Haruhi. When Kyoya appears in front of you as well, you begin to suspect maybe he put the Host Club King up to the mild kidnapping he’s just committed.

"I have no idea Tamaki-Senpai.” Your words send the blonde into a predictable fit of despair and it becomes clear to both you and Kyoya that he will no longer be an active part of this conversation. The two of you are more than used to tuning out Tamaki’s breakdowns so it’s easy to pick up the conversation without his involvement.

“It’s in your best interest to tell us everything you know (Y/N).”

“They told me not to get involved. I’ve learned to trust them when they say that.” You can tell your answer hasn’t pleased the megane but you can’t really find it in yourself to care much. If the twins told you not to get involved, you’re more than happy to let whatever this is blow over without it affecting you as well. Since you’re not a host and whatever they’re doing doesn’t affect your classes together you’re more than happy to watch from the sidelines. If it truly is just a means to an end like Kaoru said it was, you can’t imagine whatever they’re doing will last longer than a day or two. “I’ll see you both at the club after class for my usual appointment.”

It’s only when you’ve started to walk away that Kyoya responds to your statement in a monotone voice that somehow feels more calculated than usual. “If things continue the way they have been, we might be unable to fulfil your usual appointment. We’re down a pair of loving brothers you see.” You stop walking at his final words, turning on your heel to face him.

“What do you mean?” Your question, plus the blank look that appears on your face, instantly brings Tamaki out of his fit as he looks at you with an expression you can’t quite read. You place it somewhere between bewildered and perplexed but there’s another part of it that you find yourself disliking.

“Haven’t you heard? Hikaru and Kaoru are fighting.” It almost feels like the world stops spinning for a few moments as you process Tamaki’s words. The problem is that the world starts spinning again and you can almost feel the system error taking place in your mind as you wait for the blonde to tell you he’s joking. When Tamaki doesn’t rescind his sentence you feel the first prickle of anxiety starting in the back of your mind.

“They don’t fight.” Tamaki merely blinks at you owlishly.

“They’ve been fighting since yesterday. It started at the club.”

"If they were fighting, I would know."

“Is it possible that you don’t know them as well as you thought?” Part of you knows that Kyoya doesn’t mean his question to sound as harsh as it does but it still stings somewhere deep inside you.

The twins might not have fully opened up to the host club yet but you know them. There’s no way they could be fighting; there’s no way you could’ve misread the car journey that badly to miss some sign that there was disharmony between them. They’re never fought in all the years you’ve known them.

“I’ll guess we’ll find out after classes are over.” Your tone sounds more defeated than you’d care to acknowledge and you’re quick to turn away from the two hosts before you spot any kind of pity growing in their expressions.

It’s almost a relief when your free period starts and you can spend your time as you wish. Normally you’d seek the twins out, or vice versa, but something about your earlier conversation with Tamaki and Kyoya is replaying in your mind and the idea of sitting and stewing in a crowded library sounds like the worst thing on earth. You find yourself walking through the grounds of the academy, hoping some fresh air and sunlight will do something to improve your mood. It almost works until you hear a loud shout from behind you.

“Hey! (Y/N) wait!” You start to quicken your pace when you hear two sets of footsteps coming up behind you but it’s not long before Hikaru and Kaoru catch up to you. They come to a stop a few paces behind you, waiting for you to turn around and face them. The bright colours of their hair make you feel sick.

“What gives?”

“Yeah, why’d you ditch us?”

“I don’t know what you’re doing, but you need to wrap it up soon.” It’s clear your comment isn’t what the twins were expecting from you when they flinch back at your tone.

“What're you talking about?" You narrow your eyes at them.

“Your means to an end. Whatever the end is, I hope it’s worth it.” The way the two of them look at each other when you speak sends a wave of irritation over you that you rarely feel towards your best friends. It feels like they're in on some joke that you've been left behind on and you don't enjoy the feeling.

"Don't be like that."

"Yeah, it's not a big deal." Hikaru's blasé tone does nothing to soothe your irritation.

"Kyoya seems to think it is. He also seems to think I don't know you well enough to notice that you're fighting." Your words get the first serious reaction from the twins as they look at you with an unreadable expression on their faces.

"When did Kyoya say that?" Hikaru's tone is cold and you can't tell whether that's directed towards you or Kyoya. Or both. Maybe both.

"During your little display at lunch. Him and Tamaki pulled me out of the dining hall to try and work out what the fuck is going on."

"He had no right to involve you."

"Yeah, it's none of their business."

"Actually it's entirely their business if it directly affects the host club. Which it seems like it has since Kyoya’s cancelling appointments.”

“It’ll be over soon, we told you.”

"I don't know why you're pretending to fight, but I want no part of it. You told me you didn't want me involved and I was fine with that but now I am involved and I want out."

"We didn't mean for this to happen to you."

"I know."

“We’re sorry.”

“…I know.” Kaoru is the first to approach you, waiting for your reaction. When you don't take a step back, he approaches and pulls you into a hug. His brother is quick to follow and the three of you spend the next few moments entwined in silence. You listen for their breaths and even your breathing so that you're all in sync.

Their synchronicity is an ability that is as innate to them as breathing and it always feels special when they let you in for moments like this. It's only when your breathing is completely in line with theirs that you begin to untangle yourself from their arms. The events of the day feel like they’ve hit you with full effect and you’re left feeling weary.

"I'm going to go home. I'll see you tomorrow." The twins let you go without protest, the weight of their gaze heavy on you as you walk towards the main building of Ouran. After muttering some excuse about feeling unwell, it’s not long before you’re in your car on the way back home and it’s all you can do to put the events of the day behind you.

When you wake up the day after, you’re honestly not sure what to expect when one of your maids tells you that the twins' car has pulled up to take you to school. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, in fact it'd be more unusual if they didn’t, so it’s not hard to see that your maids are confused by your hesitancy to go to school. You climb into the car and sit in your usual seat, barely looking up at your companions as you grab your seatbelt and secure it. It’s only when you look away from the seatbelt that something odd about the energy in the car hits you.

It takes you a few seconds to realise why something feels off. They’ve switched colours. The weight of their eyes on you makes you shift in your seat and the seatbelt suddenly feels far too restrictive.

“Aren’t you worried about frying your hair if you keep changing it?” The smiles that appear on your friends' faces immediately settle your anxiety. If this was some test, you’ve definitely passed it.

“No one else noticed.” In a way, you’re unsurprised by that. The two of them pretend to be each other so frequently that you can only imagine their house staff have long since given up trying to work out who’s who.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit cruel to give people a way to tell you apart only to pull the rug from under them by changing it immediately?”

“We don’t want everyone to know who’s who.”

“Yeah, it takes away from our mystique.” It’s a fair comment, one you can’t refute, but there still seems to be a gaping hole in their logic.

“Some people will still know.” You gesture to yourself as an example, watching as their smiles seem to get a fraction wider.

“Yeah.”

“You'll know.”

“Looks like you do know us well enough after all.” Hikaru’s words take you by surprise. The three of you have never been the type to be overly doting on each other and you’re not sure if you’re reading the situation right.

“You did this for me?”

“Of course!”

“Can’t have Kyoya thinking he knows everything, can we?” Hikaru’s words touch you in a way you don’t think you’d be able to put into words, and as soon as the moment is with you, it’s passed; as is usually the case with the twins.

“So! You missed the craziest love confession after school yesterday…” As Kaoru goes into a tirade about some poor girl who tried to confess to Haruhi, it’s all you can do to bask in the moment of harmony with the two of them.

A/N: I’m kind of obsessed with the concept of the twins having this long suffering friend figure in their life, I think it’s such a fun avenue to go down with Ouran fics.

series masterlist

[singingcicadas]

The beginning of the Decepticons according to Megatron:

The beginning of the Decepticons What Actually Happened:

That it could ever be called a revolution of the oppressed is a joke. Megatron's philosophy is purely pugno ergo sum. I fight, therefore I am. His first recruitment speech was a promise for power, made to the most bloodthirsty audience he could dig up from the dregs of society. Those people were there because they thrived off the bloodsport. They wanted audition to join Megatron in the pits. Megatron offered them something even better: turn the entire planet into our gladiatorial arena, and we take.

Ever since the beginning Megatron viewed the Decepticons as nothing but a tool, to be used and thrown away. He wanted them to be as ruthless as possible in order to wipe out all opposition, but once his end goal's achieved, well, there's no place for ruthlessness in a perfect society under his absolute control. Therefore, remodelling and recreating. It doesn't sound like he wants to rule over actual people with individual personalities, he wants a bunch of mindless drones programmed for obeisance and peace and hardcoded to Do What Megatron Says.

Ravage and Tarn. It's interesting how they both use the word "emancipated" when lauding Megatron's accomplishments, when it's clear that Megatron did so for the practical purpose of bulking up his army. He overthrew those in power because he wanted to be the one in power. The only one. The people he "emancipated" were just exchanging one set of shackles for another, as they had no choice other than to join the Decepticon army. Not fighting was not an option. Cowardice was punishable by traitor's wheel. Going neutral was also not an option. Soundwave had specific anti-neutral pogroms for those.

I wonder if they knew what "the Megatron they loved" had in mind for the Decepticons after they won the war. The remodeling and recreating. Or maybe they thought that's just for the lowly genericons. That they would be exempt from such treatment because they were confident of their privileged places at Megatron's side. After all, if you're rooting for someone whose motto is peace through tyranny, you'd do so with the expectation that it's only Other People who are going to get tyrannized.

It's true that he did rise against an oppressive government, despite it being the goal to replace it with himself as the tyrant.

But he also thought the single admirable quality about Zeta was his ruthlessness. As in trying to kill an entire city of his own people to fuel his vamparc ribbon. And he said that in front of Hot Rod, who was forced to bomb his own city to stop Zeta from winning. Even disregarding the twisted values here, this is still fifteen levels up the insensitivity lane. No wonder Hot Rod didn't want to join up.

Torture's for fun and domination. It takes a special kind of sadistic streak. And this is before the war even officially started.

Thundercracker's view on the Decepticon cause, when he defected to save humans from the nuke:

"Everything we have done here" - Just here? He'd either been living under a rock for the entirety of the war or has some serious misunderstandings about what the Decepticon name is.

Or just been willfully blind for four million years and the deaths of a hundred billion lifeforms until the day he decided to grow a conscience. Same with Soundwave.

Tarn's a really good case study because he's the poster boy of Megatron's Decepticon propaganda. Megatron probably spoonfeeds him the stuff by the gigabytes and he regurgitates them with twice the zeal and tenfold the pretentiousness. He's also the embodiment of the vices and tragedy of the Decepticons as a whole, as created by Megatron. A sadistic hypocrite, a glorified thug, a delusional fanatic, a customized tool for use and dispose. Crippled by the blinkering desire to be superior, to be part of a greater cause.

Megatron cares nothing for Tarn, just like how he cares nothing for the Decepticons. During the war they were a means to an end. After Megatron's defection, their "toxic loyalty" became a personal burden, a blemish from his past that he would like to cast aside and move on from but annoyingly refuse to leave him alone.

The road-sweepers and the haulers. The miners. What were they to Megatron during the war? Disposable cannon fodder. A pretty banner to hide behind. For a movement that likes to justify itself as a revolution of the oppressed, the emancipation of the disenfranchised, there's certainly a distinct lack of those classes among the upper Decepticon ranks. Megatron said in his recruitment speech that he wanted strength and power. Then where did that leave the weak and sick, the empties on the streets?

Nowhere but the smelting pool, to be recycled into something useful for the great Decepticon cause. They should be honoured, really.

Freedom fighters? No, freedom won't be missed. Probably has something to do with the remodelling and recreating part.

Starscream's only partially right. It was absolutely Megatron's intent to tap into that well of rage and resentment, and he meant for the riot to happen. Of course it got away from him in the end - that's what happens when you cobble an army out of bloodthirsty power-hungry degenerates, half of which were on board for the violence, half for their own scheming agendas, and the rest stitched together by charisma and fear - but he'd shaped the events enough to come a hairsbreadth away from winning multiple times. People like Shockwave and Scorponok were treacherous, but they weren't the reason that Megatron lost the war.

It was his own blind arrogance that led to his downfall.

No he didn't lose his way. He's exactly where he set himself out to be, from the moment he gave that speech in the arena. Perhaps even earlier, to that gradual slide when killing his opponent in a match no longer felt like a guilty burden but instead brought him the sweet rush of satisfaction. There was no revolution. There was no righteous cause. There was no for the people and never has been, because he did not care about other people. Four million years and countless deaths, and it was only really about one insanely self-centered person and his deluded ambition of peace through tyranny.

Hence his breakdown, because he'd just been hit in the face with the realization that he was Wrong. And has been wrong for the past four million years. He wasted everyone's lives. He wasted his own life, wasted it on anger and destruction and hatred, with nothing but regrets to show for it.

I believe that Megatron believed he's telling the truth here. I believe that he meant every word he said, except for that one "we" on the second last line.

Because that "we" should really be "me".

The Megatron who wrote about pacifist rhetoric, who was compassionate enough to share his fuel with the injured, who cared about others and had genuine friendships, that Megatron died a long time ago in the pits. Ever since then, every murder, every atrocity he'd committed in the name of "the people" was just facist rationalization.

I'm sure that he likes the sound of "emancipation of the people" or "freedom of choice" as a concept. But when it comes down to individual people? With actual, real choices that conflicts with his desire for absolute rule? Nope. He's the only one who should get to make choices. The only one who should have choices. Because he knows best.

Form dictates your function ❌; Megatron dictates your function ✅

Function dictates your fate ❌; Megatron dictates your fate ✅

Great minds must think alike, because Megatron and the Functionalist council in the Functionalist universe did a lot of the same stuff. Massacring the Senate. Recycling people who are deemed useless burdens. Remodelling and recreating. Imperalism and genociding organics. Killing all dissenters. The Functionalists even got pretty close to Megatron's ideal of peace through tyranny with 99% of the planet fitted with brain bombs and kissing the ground at their feet. They even managed to do it while maintaining a habitable planet and full population. And Megatron took one look and was disgusted.

Megatron wasn't a misunderstood revolutionist who had his heart in the right place when he started his war. The Decepticons didn't start out well-meaning and turned bad somewhere along the way. At no point in their movement were they ever true freedom fighters. They were always Facists, through and through. They were worse than the Functionalists they hated and the Senate they overthrew. And it's important to acknowledge this because (other than it's weird to see such an obvious Facist analogy being associated with freedom fighters) otherwise you don't get the whole depth of Megatron's redemption arc, especially in the Functionalist universe.

Like the impact of this scene wouldn't be fully apparant unless you take into account that when Megatron first formed the Decepticons, all he cared about was their fighting strength. He did not care about his troops, he did not care about individual people. He considered himself above everyone and everything. He would have sneered at such a weak, ineffective form of protest. Now he's actually being supportive and seeing people as people, instead of pawns to be used.

Here he's genuinely happy to see the Decepticons, even those in the very bottom of the pecking order, taking enough care to greet them each by name. And also Fulcrum, who he sentenced to death twice.

For once in his life he's actually trying to do the Right Thing instead of focusing on himself, either on his ambitions or his remorse. The people in the Functionalist universe have nothing to do with him, yet he wants to help anyway. And he's finally appreciating the value of self-determination for what it is, instead of trying to twist it to serve his own purposes or turn it into Megatron-determination.

"No one can decide how you live your life except for you." Back before, he was going to remodel his entire army to achieve his peace through tyranny. Autonomy and free will were considered things that won't be missed.

Megatron learned to care about other people! Peace through empathy is such a groundbreaking step for his character because he used to have no empathy! He stayed true to his ideals for eight centuries despite the hardships, despite his personal losses, despite the AVL being driven to near extinction and not knowing if he would ever return to his own universe. During all those years he could have had ten million chances and excuses to break his vow of pacifism or leave on the Last Light, taking the easy way out, and there would have been no one to stop him.

But he didn’t.

[maggotzombie]

the day/night we met ; henry cavill

PAIRING — Henry Cavill x Reader (fem) SUMMARY — On your wedding day, your Maid of Honor prepares a special gift to which you and Henry have distinct responses. WORDS — 1,8k TW — nothing really just a lot of fluff, emotions (I cried a bit writing it), Henry in a suit 😈. A/N — Hi! I'm not dead, just quit the most toxic job ever so I'm getting back here lol Here's a short but very dear fic to me that I wrote last year but never posted. I'm so happy to finally post this! This story has been in my head for two years now and it came out better than I thought.

Song insp.: Eu Me Lembro by Clarice Falcão feat. Silva

— 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙

“ALRIGHT,” YOUR MAID OF HONOR smiles, carefully wiping her tears with a napkin. “After making you cry and potentially ruining some makeup,” The room laughs. “I’ve prepared something different to end this on a high note.”

This is one of the dearest moments of your life: your wedding. You’re marrying your soulmate. Your heart could burst with love and happiness whenever.

Everything’s perfect, from your dress to the lights of the venue. Henry – your newly proclaimed spouse – has an arm around you as you listen to your family and friends' speeches about you and your love.

You found it strange when your Maid of Honor wasn’t the first to speak, but it seems she has a reason for it. Immediately, you feel anxious, but in a good way.

“When these two told me they were getting married, I knew I wanted to do something special for them,” Your best friend starts. “I just didn’t know what, but I knew it had to be something remarkable, something for them to look back and have a good laugh,” She looks at the both of you with tears in her eyes, chuckling.

You also wipe tears off your eyes, smiling back at her, and Henry tightens his embrace around you.

“So I sat down with these two, separately, and started to ask a few questions,” She smiles and wiggles her eyebrows, which is an expression you know very well.

‘Oh my,’ You think. ‘What is she up to?’

“Things started to get really interesting from the start, and I decided to make a video out of it,” Your best friend winks at you. “Without further ado, enjoy it.”

With a pleasant smile, she sits down. The attention turns to the screens set around the venue.

You remember sitting with your Maid of Honor to chat about your relationship. You didn’t really understand why she wanted to do that. However, it always has been effortless talking about Henry, and you brushed it off as having something to do with the wedding.

You recall having a great time answering her questions – drinks might have been involved beforehand, but the whole process was surprisingly professional.

Your friend’s face pops up on the screen as she introduces herself. “In this little video, I wanted to talk about our lovely couple’s amazing and fun story, especially the day they met,” She explains. “Newlyweds, I love you very much, and I hope you like this little something I put together for you.”

She blows a kiss and waves. Then in fancy lettering, “A love story” is scribbled on the top-left corner of the screen, and “A story of love” on the bottom right corner. You wonder why both phrases – which convey the same thing – are on the video, but the thought quickly slips your mind when your smiling face appears on the screen.

“State your name and occupation, please,” Your friend prompts on the video, but she’s out of the shot.

You roll your eyes amusedly. “What’s this, a trial? I’m innocent, your honor!” You giggle, making everybody at the venue laugh.

You answer the question anyway, and your name also appears written on the video.

“For the purpose of… this, I’m the bride?” It sounds like a question, and you make a face, unsure of yourself.

She never explained what the video was for, in your defense.

Right after you, Henry appears. “I’m Henry, and I am the lucky groom,” He smiles brightly, looking as handsome as always.

“So, tell me, how did you meet Henry?” Your friend asks, and your smile is instant as you remember that exact day as if it was yesterday. “How did you meet Y/N?” She asks him in the next scene, and his reaction is the same.

“I was hosting a brunch,” You start, your eyes unfocused as the vivid memory plays in your mind. “And it was morning when Henry arrived.”

When he reapers, you can tell it’ll cut back and forth between you. “I was throwing a party, and she was the one that came around. I think it was three in the afternoon,” Henry replies, quite differently from you.

You scoff mockingly, looking at him by your side. He chuckles, brushing it off with a shoulder tic before you turn back to the screen.

“And I said: ‘Hi, come on in, make yourself at home,’ You know, something of the sorts,” You shrug off.

Your betrothed chuckles in the video, scratching his chin in thought. “I was the one that said hello, but she didn’t hear.”

His comment makes the venue erupt in laughter. You meet Henry’s loving gaze again and squeeze his hand, making him bring yours up to press a kiss on your knuckles.

If your shared story had different and entertaining versions until now, it’d just get better!

After being asked about first impressions of one another, he replies: “She thought I was hilarious,” He says with such confidence that is endearing.

In your turn, you laugh and cover your mouth as if what you are about to say it’s an embarrassing secret.

“Oh my god, he wouldn’t stop talking! Like a lot!” You emphasize. “And I pretended to laugh the entire time,” You say very sheepishly before throwing your head back in laughter again. “That’s terrible. I feel like I need to apologize,” You add after your fit.

“Oh, I just remembered something,” He suddenly announces, and his smile is wide as the memory toy around in his head. “Her blouse was inside out,” He chuckles, eyes focused on a spot. “She’s so adorable and such a goof, isn’t she?” He looks back at the camera.

“He loved the way I was dressed,” You giggle, visibly shivering as you physically remember the feeling of him truly looking at you for the first time.

Your friend asks another question, changing the subject slightly, but Henry shakes his head.

“Yeah, the party was great! Everybody was having a good time, but I only remember searching for her when she wasn’t near me. Trying to get another look, you know?” He says.

In turn, you scoff. “No one was dancing! I don’t remember who was taking care of the music, but it was terrible!” Your genuine response makes the room fills with laughter another time. “At least everyone had a drink in hand and ate something.”

“Oh, yes. The food was wonderful. Everything homemade,” Your partner assures with a proud nod naively.

“I bought everything off Tesco,” You rushedly confess, throwing your head back in laughter again.

Back to the present moment, you’re wiping the new tears from the corners of your eyes due to laughter. You love the good energy around the room as your guests and yourself enjoy the video your Maid of Honor made.

Now you understand both phases in the beginning, and although you and Henry have very distinct versions of the day you met, you love both of them and the feelings they bring you.

However, something changes in the next second of the video. For the first time, on a split-screen, you two appear together.

“When I saw him, I knew it (When I saw her, I knew it),” You both say simultaneously. “She (He) was the person I’d spend the rest of my life with,” You continue.

Glancing at him, you’re surprised to see he’s already looking at you. Then you exchange a knowing look. It seems like you got on the same page in this part of the video.

“And that’s how I realized that life put him (her) in my life,” You say in unison. “On that Tuesday (Thursday) of September (December),” Your responses overlap with each other, drawing amused reactions from people.

“That’s why I remember everything, of every second,” Both of you state, which is downright ironic at this point. “Ask me anything that I remember.”

“I remember,” You proudly declare with a grin but, this time, by yourself.

And so does Henry. “I remember,” He nods with a beam.

The video ends there, and the room erupts in applause, whistles, and hollered praises.

Words couldn’t describe the dazzling feelings you’re experiencing if you wanted to. You can’t be more grateful to your friend for this treat either. And, of course, the man you now get to call your husband.

The spotlight of attention returns to you as you’re exchanging the most enamored gaze ever. Henry leans in and presses his lips to your forehead, making you close your eyes. Slowly, you allow all those remarkable sensations to wash over you.

When you reopen your eyes, you smile at him before looking at your Maid of Honor. “Thank you so much for this extremely thoughtful gift. We both loved it a lot.”

Henry confirms with a head gesture.

“Words won’t do justice to how much you’re special to me. I’m just so grateful I get to share such a special and meaningful moment of my life, like this one, with you,” Your voice cracks at the end, and you smile, trying to hold your tears at bay as you can see she’s doing the same. “So I can’t thank you enough.”

As the room gets loud with another round of applause and cheers, she smiles, mouthing an “I love you too” to you. Wiping your tears carefully one more time, you chuckle.

“Although, I only have one question,” You announce, making the room pipe down. “Was my blouse really inside out?” You giggle as you look back at Henry.

Your husband starts to laugh. “Yeah,” He confirms bashfully. “Yeah, it was,” He nods as your guests join you in laughter.

“Oh, God. I can’t believe it,” You shake your head in embarrassment. “I also would like to point out that my husband clearly has a lot of experience with interviews,” You remark, addressing the room. “I feel kinda bad after saying I was pretending to laugh at his jokes when he’s all loving and caring,” You rejoin your friends and family in fun.

“I do tell bad jokes,” Henry concedes in your defense. “I love how genuine you are, and you’re loving and caring to me, too,” You nearly melt at his famous Hollywood-star smile.

The sound of ‘aww’s’ fills the room. “You see what I’m dealing with?” You joke, making everybody chuckle.

You give him a chaste but affectionate peck on the lips. Your wedding coordinator decides it’s time for the first dance to open the floor to make your guests burn some energy after the buffet.

And so, feeling the most secure and happy while pressed against your husband’s chest with his arms around you, you swing slowly. By sharing the same air, the same space, and the same feelings, you can’t think of anything better.

It all started on a Tuesday morning in September for you. But for him, it was a Thursday afternoon in December. Now, it is a Saturday evening in November that you’ll never forget.

You will remember. Everything. Of every second.

[mythalism]

I was wondering (because I love your Solas and solavellan analyses) what do you think of s*lrook? It doesn’t work for me, not because I like solavellan, but because I just don’t like Rook and some other reasons that I’m having trouble articulating. Something along the lines of “Solas mirrors” and, as Rook, we can only ever really approach him as though he is a villain with little nuance and can never ask (the man that started out as spirit of wisdom) any questions. I think maybe it would have been more interesting to me if BioWare gave Rook more meaningful regrets and let us have more rpg elements. Anyway, feel free to disagree with me or not answer this if you think it may gain negative attention. I just like the way your brain works and was curious about your thoughts because you might have an interesting perspective!

i honestly dont think of s*lrook like ever. truly it does not occupy any space in my mind. i think its probably similar to what you are feeling, which is that rook is so nothing its like putting solas with a cardboard cut out. and maybe that is why the issue of solas mirroring rook comes in; there is nothing for him to reflect. rook is also so meaningless to solas that he has no incentive to meaningfully engage with them. with the inquisitor, solas was literally tied to them by the anchor and had no choice but to spend time with them to get his orb back. but that is a process that develops over an entire year. he gets sucked into the inquisition and cannot help himself but become part of it. even solas who hates the inquisitor is deeply involved in everything they do, every decision they make he becomes complacent in as part of their inner circle. even with an inquisitor he hates, he cannot help but develop attachments to the other members of the inquisition. he is actively carrying out the inquisition's purpose. if they do something he doesnt like, such as recruit the templars or keep the wardens or kill the sentinels, it makes sense for him to speak up, to challenge the inquisitior, to make his distaste known because he is directly involved. he is also directly responsible for corypheus gaining such power. all of this personal entanglement in the events of inquisition give him and even a low-approval inquisitor a dynamic that is interesting and complex. their erasure into a figurehead for the purpose of a cause is familiar to him at the very least. the way he reflects the inquisitor is entrenched in the plot and who they both are as characters. he reflects the inquisitor because the inquisitor is walking the same path he was forced to.

in veilguard, i think that him being trapped for so long was a mistake writing-wise. despite solas being literally integral to EVERYTHING HAPPENING, he feels completely separate. he only has a few things to say about each major plot point, we can barely ask him more than a few questions about anything throughout the entire game, we dont get to confront him on his memories, we dont get to see him react with anyone. he literally exists in a vacuum. there is nothing for him to reflect, nothing for him to engage with. he is literally in an empty room, talking to an empty character. what is there to work with in that? where is there a relationship to be had? they kept telling us that rook reminded solas of himself which is honestly hilarious in retrospect because what??? where??? how??????? because they did something rebellious one time??? but solas and rook never actually talk about that. they never actually talk about anything about rook's life. solas doesn't even pass judgement on their decisions. their conversations all have the same set end point. his goal from the beginning is always to shape them into taking his place in the prison (however the fuck that works) and all of their interactions are defined by that, and happen in the shadow of rook ruining his ritual and releasing the evanuris. compared to solas and the inquisitor, who at their core, is a manifestation of his mistakes as a victim of his underestimation of corypheus and the bearer of his anchor which will eventually destroy their body. there is an immediate thread of guilt and connection through those circumstances. for solas and rook, the opposite should actually be true; rook should feel guilt for getting solas trapped through their carelessness, but they clearly dont lol. its just so nothing. rook is so nothing. solas reflecting rook thus is also nothing. there is a reason the game picks up so much when we see him outside of the prison, talking to the companions, having a moment with emmrich, being eviscerated by harding, killing ogres in one hit, tearing into an archdemon... its pretty mutually agreed upon as the best part of the game? why would you make a character that, as a spirit, reflects his environment, and then put him in an empty room in the game named after him? and then why would you set him up with an empty protagonist who was clearly designed only to further the plot and not have a real story or arc of their own? flop.

[odessa-2]

Titbits and analysis 🖖

As promised, some more titbits from the Con yesterday in Melbourne as well as my interpretations. Prior to attending yesterday, I told myself to keep an open mind and attempt to leave any biases behind (even after having seen the funeral pics). Clean slate. To try and view Sam, the event, questions, and subsequent behaviours objectively.

I'm the sort of person who feels energy and is affected by it and in some ways governed by it. The energy of people, both individually and collectively. The energy of a group. I tend to couple this with objective analysis, which forms the basis of my conclusions about people and situations.

I applied this method yesterday in attempting to understand and view Sam, the OL money 💰 machine and everything else. I also just wanted to go there and bask in the audience and enjoy myself....and....I did like it Jamie.

So first thing I noticed off the cuff was how experienced Sam was in handling questions, and the women, and tailoring his behaviour to suit their desires. He was charming, charismatic, approachable, a skilled professional. I saw the veneer. I felt the veneer. I also saw and felt that he is a pretty decent bloke under that veneer. A man with a solid work ethic, who is mild mannered and working with purpose in his life.

I observed that his handler or Convention agent or whatever he is, Steve, was in full control. He managed Sam's performance in a sense. He asked the questions and even set the directions for some answers. Sam is controlled. I didn't like Steve. I didn't get the best vibe off him. Infact, I got a bad vibe off him. I observed that everything was a performance. Scripted to a large degree. The Single Sam narrative was pushed by Steve. Hard. It was a performance. That much was clear to me.

So Sam chose to mention that he was in Austria skiing 2 weeks ago....blah blah...something about singing a Ronan Keating song. So the script tells everyone nice and early that he is NOT with Caitriona ✅️

Later on in the panel, he mentioned that he "was at the theatre in London the week earlier" watching a play. Huh? Getting his timeline confused? Interesting titbit, I thought. Who would he go to the theatre with whilst in London? Who else likes to go to the theatre? Who have we seen him go to the theatre with before? Ding ding ding!!

One of the first things he spoke about (umprompted) and imo was part of his speaking program, was that Caitriona is back home in Scotland doing prep work and will be directing this season. He said that he spoke to her recently and that she is cold and miserable back home. No one seemed to give a shit. The women were there for their Jamie. Sam read the crowd. He understood.

Sam tried to bring Cait into the conversation again saying something like "Where's Claire?....Caitriona isn't here". Again crickets from the audience.

He said that he auditioned with a lot of Claire's, but they couldn't find the right fit and that nobody was as brilliant as Caitriona.

It sounded like he genuinely missed her.

He spoke of his audition with Cait, saying they were very physical and were almost wrestling each other. He said he was sweating all over her and that his sweat was on her. The crowd still only wanted to hear about their Jamie. I think Sam relished in being cheeky in saying that she wore his sweat that day.

Someone asked about "how do you kiss and make out with a costar and then just carry-on. Isn't it awkward"? Sam responded generally initially, saying that there's lots of checking in with the person and apologising afterwards (in a joking fashion). Then that prompted him to start talking about Cait saying that he has also "snotted" all over Cait and exchanged many body fluids with her (in an acting context presumably)and that there's nothing really left to do together that they haven't already done. I was like "whoooaa wtf Sam?". Shooketh that he said that really. The silence from the crowd was palpable. They really didn't want to hear about Cait and Sam and their shared bodily fluids whilst 'acting'. He is THEIR fantasy man. Not Caitriona's. Silence from the audience. Sam already knew that the crowd were Sam onlies but he loved telling this story. Relished in it imo. He loved the double entendre. It was an unrehearsed, unscripted conversation as it resulted from an audience question. I concluded it was an act of defiance on his behalf. That's what it felt like to me.

Steve the convention agent guy, was always bringing it back to Single Sam. "I worry how are you going to get a date" said Steve. With Sam understanding the prompt ...."I worry too" says Sam. Bachelor narrative secured ✅️

Steve spruked the Bachelor narrative again to Sam's thirsty and adoring fans....."Sam you remind me of that old show where everyone has to guess which bachelor is going to come out of the mystery door". And that's when I knew with 100 percent certainty that the bachelor talk was a ruse. It was so contrived and performative. I smiled to myself. The women in the crowd were eating it up.

Another thing that stood out to me was when Sam was searching for the right terminology when talking about Cait. "My......co star" huge pause.

"I love you Claire" is the line he randomly chose to say when explaining his acting.

When asked how he has time to foster friendships and spend time with his family he talked around it. Avoided the question and kept it about his friendships saying that they are strong friendships that endure. He diverged and started talking about how he still has his core friendships that he had when he was bunking and sharing an apartment/house with them in London when he was younger. The veneer was up. Inpenetrable.

At another point in the panel Sam asked "How many Sheila's are there here"? LOL. I found that amusing.

Now this next part captured my attention the most. It had a weird feeling (energy) around it . Sam gave off a weird energy. Almost hostile. Again that's just what I felt.

Someome from the audience named Toni with an "I" was selected to ask a question. I can't remember what the question was but Sam made a really big deal about her being named Toni. "There's always a Tony have you noticed"? Why is there always a Tony"? He said. He didn't want to drop it. He placed a little too much emphasis on it. I was laughing silently but Sam's double entendre didn't go unnoticed by me. Everyone else was clueless or at least that's how it appeared to me. Was that an Easter egg dropped by Sammy?

Asked about what does he do for self care, he seemed to struggle answering that too. He talked in circles about his way points hike and how he's learning how to live in the moment. There's that wall again.

There were many other things discussed of course but I thought I'd focus on the things that shed light on his situation and that resonated with me.

So my closing Analysis? Sam is controlled. He peforms. He caters. He's intelligent and in tune with people and aims to please but is private. Sunday just reaffirmed and solidified my beliefs. Caitriona snatched up that hard working gem of a man quick smart!

[murderofsomeone]

it's probably decently obvious that my main lemon demon design was created BEFORE seeing any fandom depictions (or even really that much official art past the logo) because of how violently he stands out in comparison to other designs. it's a little obvious that my inspiration was self-contained and it granted me a bit of creative freedom along with a completely different train of thought while designing him. his three eyes however is very much a relic of 2022 because I was designing a lot of demons with asymmetrical faces at the time and well, why not make another

anyway here's a comparison of him to my most recent lemon demon original design (where it's a bit more obvious I was influenced by somewhat of a fandom culture)

extra bonus rambling under the cut

my general design process has actually stayed relatively contained with a few exceptions like soft fuzzy man's color and weirdly neil himself. yeah sorry chat neil is the first guy that was highly influenced by someone else's design you can shoot me too if you'd like. but I legitimately believe he's the only real example because every other character that has a design remotely similar to someone else is likely due to us both following a similar source material (like my cabinet design being based off polybius) or there being only so many ways to interpret the design (gef the mongoose would've fallen into this category if it wasn't for the fact I made him Joker colors)

in general I tend to follow a mindset of how "weird" I can make a design or how much I can push a lyric/implement it into a design. I also like to twist around the convention and try new things. a good example of both of these apply to my doctor amnesia design.

really the main things going through my head were "well he didn't state HOW many eyes", chosing an eye color that often is overlooked in conventional beauty standards to elevate them and cause you to think, while leaning into the somewhat otherworldly nature she's depicted in by giving her blue skin, a color I associate with the song.

another fun thing I'll do is create a "design pipeline" where I'll take an attribute and run it through a list of connections before we end up in a place long past where we started or just combining a bunch of traits that could be interpreted that way, resulting in designs like this.

though wolfgang isn't my weirdest design, he definitely did not start where we ended off. I believe before the wizard of oz theming for clown circus was set in stone (a choice that has EVERYTHING to do with oz explodes and an element I'll explain later), he was some kinda mirror object head that had absolutely nothing to do with his current namesake. since I wasn't satisfied with that design, I kept a relative aspect of the personality and shapes and thus ended up creating a really interesting take on a character who is largely depicted as... well there's no really good way to say this, but Bad.

since I was working with a new fresh aspect I started by making him a wolf... and then connecting him to "there's a robot in my head". this kind of connected the dots to ultimately make him associated to the tin man, since no one was connected to that character for the wizard of oz element and it was up for grabs (this is also how he somehow got associated with toasters via connecting the previously mentioned song to "what's in the toaster", etc etc). these pipelines of connecting songs that aren't normally related, but making them Work in a believable way makes designs more interesting for me and gives them a bit more purpose and personality. I think this is what ultimately makes people get a bit lost on my interpretations considering they aren't super simple by just being about One Song, but by being about multiple that aren't originally related in the source material. just like how I connected dr amnesia to when he died, explaining a bit of her more mildly supernatural or off-putting elements by making the man in that song her father.

the final real design element that I focus on is the strange rule I follow in terms of how these characters are shaped. there's a massive sort of "alice in wonderland" theming going on in terms of how human/humanoid designs look in contrast to designs that look less and less human. their proportions become more cartoon and shaped, their sizes are affected etc etc all while the human/humanoid characters stay relatively normal next to each other with more believable design elements.

here's the horrid long strip of nearly 100 different character renders next to each other to get a general idea on what I'm talking about

the silhouettes of the human characters "pop" less because they're supposed to contrast to their nonhuman counterparts. which isn't something I normally do, but given the source idea of a sort of "wonderland", I think it works in this specific context.

in conclusion: I'm design autistic and like to use designing to try new things, which is why I fucked that lemon up. sorry about that chat

[ash5monster01]

Hello Darling 🩷Could you do an imagine with Charlie Dalton x plus size reader where the reader feels insecure about her weight and Charlie shows her how perfect she is to him if you know what I mean 😉. (If you don't write smut or just feel uncomfortable don't do it it is fine. Just do him being comforting)Thank you so much and have a nice day 🩷🩷

Just The Way You Are

Pairing: Charlie Dalton x PlusSize!FemReader

Warnings: 18+, foreplay, nudity, language, minor angst, self deprecation, use of the word fat, mentions of bullying, fluff

Summary: Being a bigger girl was already hard enough, when the college hot shot starts to take interest in you, you think it’s a joke. Charlie proves to you it isn’t.

word count: 2k

Masterlist

“Please go away” you beg, eyeing the brunette boy who had purposely thrown his frisbee your way at least ten times. The quad was large enough for everyone and yet the annoying and overly cocky boy from your English class found it funny to nearly hit you each time. You wanted to rip the dam beret off his head and throw it up in the tree you leaned against.

“Sorry doll, it’s an accident” he says giving you a sickly sweet smile as he retrieves the item once again. He’s joined by two other boys who were smug faces like they know he was doing this on purpose.

“Sure” you scowl, collecting your books and stacking them in your lap. That’s when his face falls, actually realizing he had upset you. It takes a few moments to collect everything and even then you stand awkwardly as you try to balance it all.

“I’ll be right back guys” he calls out to his friends, throwing the frisbee with actual skill their way before turning his attention back to you. He doesn’t even give you a choice as he scoops half the stack of books out of your arms. “I’ll walk you”

“It’s fine, you really don’t have to” but he’s already starting to the dorms with stuff you can’t finish your assignments without. Groaning you shuffle along behind him, doing your best to keep up.

You couldn’t really explain Charlie’s interest in you. It was already tough enough being the weird fat girl on campus. The other girls whispered mean things about you in the halls and rounds of laughter came from boys when you passed by. You had planned to keep your head down and graduate, that is until you met Charlie. The brunette boy with mischievous eyes and a daunting grin who had a will to drive you up a wall. You had thought it was to make fun of your size but so far he was the only boy in this school to have never brought it up.

“Are you trying to push my buttons?” you ask as you join his side and this time he gives you an earnest smile, head looking down to eye you.

“Can’t I just do something nice without you accusing me?” he asks and you roll your eyes, fearing anyone in this school was everything but nice towards you.

“I just don’t understand your constant need to be in my face all the time. I’m just trying to get through school like everyone else” you say as you reach the girls dorm hall. Charlie’s following you now and that’s when you realizes you had absentmindedly guided him to your home base. The only safe haven on this entire campus.

“I thought I was being obvious” Charlie says once you reach your door, noting how you have a single. You use your elbow to push the handle down and open the room up to you both. He happily follows you in.

“Obvious about what?” you ask as you drop your stuff onto your desk. Charlie sets his half of the pile on top of it before propping his hands on his hips and looking you up and down. Just the idea of him checking you out has your body lighting up with nerves.

“I’m flirting with you doll” he says like it’s the most natural thing. The confession has you choking on air, gaping at him like what he had just said was absurd. To you it was.

“This isn’t kindergarten Charlie. You don’t pull a girls hair or call her names to get her attention. You do not like me like that” you inform him, shaking your head and trying to calm the panic that swells in your chest.

“Well forgive me but I went to an all boys school. The only flirting knowledge I do have comes from the playground. That’s not for you to decide if I like you or not” he defends, eyebrows furrowed and looking more serious than you’ve ever seen him. Suddenly it’s hard to look him in the eye.

“Listen, I don’t know what kind of sick joke this is but I don’t want to hear it. Go find another girl to throw your frisbee at” you say, trying to usher him out the door but he holds his ground, unmoving as he looks at you.

“Why is this so hard for you to comprehend?” he asks and you gasp, face flushing as you realize he’s just called you out on something you have no interest in explaining. Yet you have no where to go.

“I’m not the kind of girl you flirt with. If you haven’t noticed I’m fat and everyone else on this campus acts accordingly. I suggest you do the same and leave me alone” something flashes behind Charlie’s eyes, something you don’t recognize as he looks at you with something different than sympathy. Had it been sympathy you would’ve shoved him out the door.

“Doll you are not fat, please don’t say that. You’re so beautiful. I’ve never seen a girl like you in my life. I didn’t even know what to do with myself around you so I just started acting like an ass” the admission is paired with a look in his eyes that convey adoration. Something you had never seen directed at you before.

“This isn’t funny Charlie, you don’t have to pretend for my sake. Let’s just let this go and pretend it never happened” you go to shove him out the door again but his hands lock around your wrists, holding you in place until the only thing you can do is look him in the eye.

“You have the most beautiful eyes. Every time I look at them I feel like I’m lost as sea, drowning in the color until there’s nothing left of me. Your smile is astounding, it freezes me in place every time I see it. I spend my nights dreaming that one day you’d direct it towards me” you’re silent as he says this, the words washing over you like the tide dragging you out to sea. You had never heard anyone speak about you like that.

“What else?” you whisper and Charlie grins when he realizes he has really caught your attention now.

“I have to try not to get dizzy when I smell your shampoo. The scent of you intoxicates me and I dream of my clothes smelling like you too. You’re also so funny it hurts. I never thought it possible to meet someone I found funnier than me. Paired with your body-” he’s cut short by the soft shake of your head, him having lost you after his small spiel.

“Nothing to say about my body” you try to pull away but he holds you in place. Eyes piercing your own in hope his next words will resonate with you.

“Your body is different than any I have ever seen. I trace your curves with my eyes everyday, wondering what it would be like for my hands to travel the hills of your breasts to the dip of your waist. Even just the sight of your ass has me dreaming about how plush it must be. The expanse of your neck when you wear your hair up makes me drool. Everything about you is soft and I want to cover myself entirely in your warmth” you suck in a sharp breath, not expecting the honest words that had come from the boy. Words that had made the curves and size of your body to sound so beautiful.

“I don’t know what to say?” you tell him, unsure if you want to cry happy tears or hug him for uplifting you in a way you never had been before.

“Then just let me show you” he says and your eyebrows draw together, confused as to what he means until his hand brushes your hair behind your shoulder and glides across your bare skin. Fingers tugging the neckline of your blouse and pulling it away slowly.

“Oh” you blab out like a fool, his eyes asking you for permission that you grant with the nod of your head. Every part of you is screaming not to but the way he looks at you is enough to have your fingers fumbling with the buttons of the silk material.

Charlie’s hands make home on your waist as you continue, the top opening more and more to reveal the white lace bra underneath. Charlie’s throat goes dry before helping you shrug the material off your shoulders. Next is the zipper of your skirt that he’s happy to assist with. It takes only moments for it to fall and pool around your feet. In front of him you stand in only your undergarments and Charlie can’t tear his eyes away.

As you sit there fearing the largeness of your arms and the plump of your stomach he feels as if he’s reached heaven looking at you. You were a real woman, the kind of girl that only he could handle. He wasn’t sure if it would be to forward to ask for you to suffocate him. Either way he’s sure no air would ever return to his lungs if he doesn’t kiss you right now.

“Doll, can I take care of you?” and the desperate whine from your lips is confirmation enough for him to seal his against your own. He swallows the sound and locks it in his heart forever, tongue dipping in to taste you as his fingers find the clasp of your bra. You reach out for him, hands grabbing his shoulders and tugging his hair as the straps come loose. You only let go for him to pull it off of you.

“Wow” is all he says as he pulls back and takes in the sight of you. All those years of stealing his Dads playboys to finally see a pair of breasts that could easily be in the magazine in person. As a man possessed he reaches out, cupping you in his hands, squeezing softly and unable to hide the hard on anymore.

“Charlie” you say in a plea, unsure what you’re begging for as he gropes you softly, nipples pebbling under his palms.

“I know baby, I know” and then his mouth was latched around your nipple, sucking softly as he pinched the other. Unable to stop the moan you let out your cheeks turn red from embarrassment. You’ve made a mess in your panties and if you had known what this was going to turn into you would’ve yelled at him sooner.

“Feels so good” you cry as he switches to your other breast, hand now nudging your panties down. It should be unfair that he was still fully clothed.

“Lay down” he orders and you obey, sprawling out on your bed as he tugs his own shirt over his head, knocking the beret off in the process. You watched shamelessly as he removes all articles of clothing until his length is brushing along his lower abdomen. You swear you already feel him as heat pools in your stomach.

“I’m gonna show you just how gorgeous you are” he says crawling above your form and you grin, trying not to whimper when his length brushes along your inner thigh. It’s then he smiles wide at you, looking like a simple boy.

“What?” you can’t help but ask, the smile still etched across your face and Charlie shakes his head lightly.

“Nothing, it’s just you finally smiled at me” and the sentiment makes you blush. Your red cheeks earn you a soft kiss, his hand trailing from your shoulder over your breast, down the expanse of your stomach, and inching closer and closer to the spot between your legs. It’s then you swear to always take Charlie for his word again.

“Keep doing what you’re doing and I’ll smile at you forever”

[borzoilover69]

just scrolled through your hs2:oot tag, looks great looking forward to it! ^^

yeah about that...

my interest in homestuck other than certain factors of it has been dead for a while. I dont think i have the motivation for it and desire to see that storyline through.

HOWEVER.

Since its.. on permanent hiatus. I suppose i can just spoil the entire storyline and the determined outcomes of the entire thing? So click below if you wanted to see how THAT story goes.

-----v

HS2:OOT was to take place at the end of the long hiatus of hs2. After crocker targets johns house and burns it to the ground, jake comes back and finds the house, burning. BGD appears to torment Jake, arguing over fault, their relationship, and whether BGD is really saying what dirk would say. BGD also makes mention of the "cosmic asshole in space". As tensions rise, they reach a point where BGD decides to nope the fuck out and kill himself to detach himself from jake.

(ill add the pnale reference in a bit)

Jake has a breakdown.

After the breakdown, Jake seeks out john. john has just exited roxy and calliopes house (again this took place after the great pause, everything that came out this year-ish wasnt around) and talk over issues, concluding that things HAVE been off. For a long time now. That they have to do something, but what?

Hesitantly, Jake asks about Johns retcon powers. They deliberate, John hesitant even though they are "off canon" these are still their friends. They go back and forth on this before john argues that he doesnt even know WHERE to retcon to. Yet they still give it a try. MEANWHILE.. CRUSIING THROUGH PARADOX SPACE AT THE SPEED OF WHATEVER...

A SHIP GOES DARK. DAVEBOT: hey is it getting dark in here or what DAVEBOT: what the fuck is happening ARADIA: oh dear we've run out of time DAVEBOT: no no fuck this wasnt supposed to happen shit. DAVEBOT: aradia the fuck are you talking about ARADIA: we've run out of time, i'm sorry dave. DAVEBOT: i thought doomed timelines were for the game only DAVEBOT: the whole fucking point of this was that we were going to get out DAVEBOT: we were supposed to get out DAVEBOT: shit callie what the hells going on

Jades body stiffens and falls limp.

Retconning without purpose brings them to a blank space. Specifically, the black hole in which alt calliope resides. And man is she PISSED. Shes vague, condescending, and focuses on the fact they were "comfortable" and "safe". This is met by profuse denials, they want things to happen and "hasnt nothing been happening enough?"

CALLIOPE: The page and the heir were to remain. JOHN: ok. shut up.

[bickering later ]

JOHN: ok, i don't really care though, because clearly none of this is right!! this is the most garbage i've ever heard!!! They argue and bicker, and even fight somewhat. Calliope kicks their asses royally, and yet their defiance raises an eyebrow. They decide to do a trade deal. Calliope will grant them a set amount of time and they must defeat or at least put a stop to Jakes cosmic ex. If they fail to do that, she will take ultimate control and send them all back.

Calliope sends them back to a point before dave ascended and before the wormhole closed. Its a bright sunny day, and jake appears a little bit after john does. When asked, he said that calliope was asking him for something. John doesnt ask what.

John asks out of the blue if they can head to karkats house. When asked why, he talks about johns situation and the guilt he vaguely references from their last conversation. karkat isnt fully part of the revolution yet, and since the happy nuptials of jade and dave, hes been staying home and bedrotting. Isolated from human society and the new troll society, he prefers it that way as he lacks aim or purpose.

They ask for his help, explaining their situation. "We need your help beating my cosmic ex." "WHAT THE FUCK SORT OF COCAINE DID YOU TWO DO. THAT SOUNDS LIKE BULLSHIT. REPEAT WHAT THE FUCK YOU SAID TO YOUR LOCAL PSYCHOLOGIST." He also goes into the whole "thing with dave" (writing by august)

Karkat isnt budging, bringing up multiple points on why he shouldnt go, even if what theyre saying is true. This could really honestly be a cosmic fuck over. So when in doubt, reverse psych it out. John nonchalantly says ok, thats fine. We are going to respect your decision here. And karkat gets mad. REALLY. REALLY. MAD.

They end up reverse psychologying him into thinking its a personal FAVOUR that hes doing them by making sure they dont asphyxiate on dead air in space. Karkat and john talk about stuff happening, while Jake says he has to run a few errands. Karkat bringing up more questions about how easily john is doing this, john fumbling but probing more into what this pre-revolution karkat thinks to try and understand what the other karkat was on about. Jake returns, and the ship is ready to go.

this music

[Cue flash that shows the ship, then the town zooming out as. callback to when janes house entered the medium, and then zoom in on the ship as it takes off, entering through the wormhole into paradox space. Sollux on the roof gets blown over by the breeze, watching them. Inside the wormhole, Jake celebrates and highfives John before walking out, leaving karkat behind as he stares up into the soaring heavens. The perspective switches to the front of jakes ship, showing that its more reminiscent of a large battleship before it switches to dirks ship, flying through space he looks up at the screen. Slow pan over the members of the cast going to be relevant, terezi in front of a board of pinned papers and threads, rose watering plants, a timelapse of jakes ship and its occupants setting up and personallising the space. Alt calliope, davebot, the meat crew. etc. Cut to black and fade in text: HS2:OOT]

Ill put more later. But that was all of act one. maybe ill put up act two and other plotpoints later in another post along with the exclusive business.

[queerprayers]

Hi! This advent I really want to honour my faith rather than just celebrating christmas in a secular sense. I found your post about advent and the liturgical new year inspiring, and I was wondering if you could point me towards some ideas or resources for advent practices or ways to go about worship specifically for this period - everywhere I've looked just talks about lighting candles, which I'm not able to do in my current housing. Do you have any suggestions?

Thank you for your blog and everything you write here, and I hope you have a wonderful new year <3

Happy Advent, beloved! Candles are great (including fake ones or felt/crafted ones)—or you could recreate a similar weekly/daily thing, like hanging another star in the window. But that's not your only option. Here are some thoughts! (I also said some similar things last year you might find interesting.)

One of the most meaningful things about my Advents growing up was the fact that it was visibly not-quite-Christmas. We put up our tree maybe a few days before but we didn't decorate it until Christmas Eve. We didn't listen to Christmas music till Christmas—we listened to Advent music. We put our nativity set in the window, but gradually—we would set up Mary and Joseph traveling to it, and I remember waiting to unpack the baby Jesus until Christmas Eve. (The wise men were on the bookshelf until Epiphany.) I've put a painting of the Annunciation on my altar, but Christmas stuff will wait. 

It's very important to me to make each season distinct materially. The things around me, the music I listen to, the books I read, the prayers I say, change tangibly—in Advent and Lent especially. My emotions come and go, what I'm thinking about is different every day, but it's Advent because I am doing Advent—and not yet doing Christmas, no matter what the music in the grocery store or the parties I'm invited to tell me. (I don't refuse to find joy in them, I'm just conscious about the fact that I'm in a different season. It's not as big a deal to me as the Lent/Easter divide, though, which I will defend with every part of me.)

I love liturgical colors for this reason, too—my church isn't very extravagant and mostly looks the same throughout the year, but the altar cloth is a different color. I know exactly what season it is just from that. (Our Advent is blue to honor Mary, but most people's is purple like Lent with maybe a pink Gaudete Sunday.) My home altar also changes color, so I have that visual in my room as well.

So do it on purpose, candles or no. Maybe wait on a few Christmas-y things, like ornaments or music (don't worry, Christmas has twelve days and then you can keep doing it all through the Epiphany season if you want). Make it Advent, whenever you start! 

Historically, Advent traditions have been very similar (or identical) to Lenten ones. The Orthodox church calls Advent the Nativity Fast. It's been a penitent preparation. Things we may associate with Lent, like going without things or structured prayer, can find a home in Advent as well.

Secular celebrations and consumerism have affected Advent as well as Christmas, with countless calendars and just in general by filling our lives with Christmas themes that might make us forget Advent has its own themes. (To be clear, I support anyone celebrating Christmas—once a religion evangelizes/colonizes/rules, it has no right to accuse people of appropriating its holidays. I am simply talking about how the cultural practice differs.) Advent has themes of peace and love and hope, but it's got more specific themes than that, scarier stuff than that. It's about Christ's coming in the Incarnation, but it's also about Christ coming all around us every day, and Christ's promised future coming.

Spend some time with Isaiah, spend some time with meditations on Mary (I just read some of Catherine of Siena's words which are here as a reading for March 25.). From the poem I posted, you can tell I spent some time with Joel last year. Here's the Revised Common Lectionary daily readings for these seasons—you could start a habit or do it for a season or explore some passages every once in a while. You can find the Book of Common Prayer's traditional Advent prayers here (The Collects >> choose Traditional or Contemporary language >> Seasons of the Year). The ancient "O Antiphons" accompany the Magnificat starting Dec. 17 (here's a booklet with commentary & Latin chant). Forward Movement has several podcasts, if you want to pray daily while commuting or taking a walk or right before bed.

There are a million Advent devotionals out there—you can find one from an author you like, or search your/a denomination + "advent devotional" or "advent prayers" and you'll probably find something. For some social justice oriented ones, I've found Red Letter Christianity's Reflections from Bethlehem (by Palestinian authors), Justice Unbound's Boundless: An Anti-Colonial Advent Devotional, and the UCC's Abolition Advent Calendar. Cole Arthur Riley (Black Liturgies) is doing an Advent series on her Patreon. Jan Richardson posts art and poetic blessings throughout the year.

In terms of books, I recommend:

Watch for the Light: Readings for Advent and Christmas

Preparing for Christmas (Richard Rohr)

Celtic Advent (David Cole)

WinterSong (Madeleine L'engle & Luci Shaw)

Advent for Exiles (Caroline Cobb)

If you want poetry: Accompanied by Angels (Luci Shaw). 

I'll tell you a secret—most devotionals are meant to be read every day, but no one will know if you don't do that. You can start them at any time and read as much as you like whenever you like. Don't not start one because you don't think you'll be regular about it. 

And of course, you don't need a book to say "Advent" on the front for it to be an Advent book—or music or anything else. I'm about to start God Hunger: Discovering the Mystic in All of Us (John J. Kirvan) which I picked up at a book sale but it's on the Internet Archive! I'm drawn to poetry and Marian hymns in this season, and things that talk about the end of the world and prophecy. Whatever Advent is to you, surround yourself with it—and anything you're just starting to think about, you can explore.

The beautiful news is? The years spiral on, and Advent returns. Every year we're confronted with it, and every year I never do exactly what I wanted. But I've found some stuff to bring with me, some books to reread, things I know further my practice and things that don't. And when the spiral returns to this distinctive place of waiting for something already in our hearts, of hoping for something we don't understand, of inviting in someone who has already snuck in like a thief in the night, we can try again.

So happy Advent, and may yours be visibly, tangibly, purposefully Advent. May you be the impractical kind of hopeful and the holy kind of scared. Christmas is a miracle slowly being tended (rather than Easter's miracle erupting from the ground)—not that there's no blood, no surprise, but that for nine months Life itself grew quietly. So keep watch. Make your life a womb, make your Advent a narrowing toward the humanity God enters. Tend the darkness and bring in some light—a candle is just a way to do that, but there's so much light in the world. Here's to finding it.

<3 Johanna

[improper-use-of-germx]

Thinking about Mychael waiting for his friend to come back...

(Mychael and all of Mushroom Oasis belongs to the talented and wonderful @/deerspherestudios)

It's recently been answered that Mychael wouldn't stalk you before the agreed-upon hangout. He wants things to go well, he can certainly wait five days if it means you'll continue to see him. I mean, he has to. There's so much at stake now.

Of course, that doesn't make it any easier on him. Five days isn't a lot in the grand scheme of things. Five sunrises, five cycles of his daily chores, five sleeps if he decided to adhear to the whole circadian-rhythm thing (which he does end up doing, makes the nights go by faster).

But knowing what's at the end of all the waiting- if he didn't know any better he'd say that the sun was purposefully setting slower on purpose.

Eventually realizes that putting so much focus on the passage of time was making things worse, so he tries throwing himself into little projects. Knitts a few dozen articles of clothing with you in mind, he doesn't even really mean to make so many. He just wants to get the size right this time, and it turns out knitting for someone smaller than him eats up even less time than it usually does.

He hugs each of the sweaters to his chest to try and see if it feels right. They're all too empty in the middle for him to really be sure.

You invade all of his thoughts, no matter what it is he's doing. He has the urge to make extra of everything he cooks, finds himself glancing across the table at where you sat before and wondering what you would have to say about food. He doesn't sit in that chair your entire absence, he likes knowing that there's a spot saved for you.

Talks to the ladies a lot. He spends a good amount of time with them everyday regardless, but now he's yapping at them constantly. What you might be doing that very second, what he wants to do when you're here next, the exact nature of his feelings for you.

Mychael already kinda knew he loved you. "Love" as a theme was everywhere, especially what he had come to understand as the romantic kind. Even if it hadn't interested him too awful much, the idea of love always managed to worm it's way into every story he read. When the feelings started to manifest he was quick to catch on, even if he didn't know what to do with himself afterward.

His chickens are the first to hear him admit it outloud. He buries his face in Rosie's feathers and mumbles it to her, face completely blue. All of these feelings are so new to him, he just needs someone to vent to. Thankfully, the ladies aren't very judgemental.

He might use the time to do some research on relationships and romance and what have you. Some of the books in the library are... let's just say a bit much for him to handle. But he finds himself enjoying the idea of dating someone, being close to someone constantly and sharing an extra-special, personal bond. The daydreams these books put in his head are addicting, but also overwhelming.

He's just so excited for your next visit, and the feelings seem to get stronger by the day. Who knows what he's going to feel when he finally sees you again?