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wolfwing04 · 1 year

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As Above, So Below - The Discovery

Rin Okumura x OC

Chapter 3

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The tension surrounding Mr Noihaus and Rin is so thick you’d need a saw to cut it. A thick tension that is cut when Sir Mephisto Phelis bursts from the roof of the room, kicking Rin in the forehead.

He explains how “This was the Exquire exam” and “You were always safe”. But most importantly we will get our results in a few days.

We are all taken to one of the many spare rooms which is now fashioned as a makeshift infirmary. However, since almost everyone was hooked up to IV drips, I find refuge in my room instead. A divine soldier of life and death…is terrified of needles and can feel the phantom sensation of them.

Yukio still comes in and checks on me though. He’s joined by Bon who’s brought some jellybeans and juice. “Since you can’t handle needles, we found another way to boost your body back from the exam.” So while Yukio gives me a check over, Bon and I share snacks. He’s not too bad.

——

That night, I’m awoken by loud gunshots. I quickly throw on some shoes, grab a few daggers, and race to rooftop, whereupon I find Yukio in battle with Mr Noihaus. Without a second thought, I join in the fight. Against the smaller demons, we both prove effective.

It isn’t until Noihaus’s large ghoul forms in the middle of the circle when Yukio and I are definitely out matched, but still we try and fight it off. Bullet wounds do nothing and my blades even less, all we’re doing is pissing it off. It soon has enough. With one hand it’s grips around Yukio’s neck and with another flings me off the edge of the roof.

Down…

Stop.

I don’t fall far. My subconscious doesn’t allow it and pushes out my wings automatically. Technically I am of more use like this, but it comes with the trade off of Yukio and Rin knowing…well…could be worse.

Up I go to join the fight again. Dagger right into the neck of the ghoul. It bursts into blue flames. It can’t be… I stay in the air, ready to either dodge or fight. But the owner of the flames is someone I’d never expect. It’s Rin. Tail and horns, and everything. He catches my eye and we both take a second to register each other as we are. Shit.

Noihaus takes the opportunity to spritz Rin with holy water, diminishing his power. “Well now Miss Turner, this is a surprise.” Noihaus smirks. Cocky, misgendering asshole. Yukio takes the commotion as an opportunity to destroy the summoning circles. “Mr Noihaus please…you’re loosing a lot of blood.” I try to soothe. “Why are you doing this?” Yukio cries. Confusion and anger dripping from his words.

Noihaus explains everything. About the Blue Night. His family. His wife. “Kind of like Heracles…” Putting the blades away, I slowly make my way towards Noihaus “Would you like me to help heal you?” He slowly stretches out his arm that’s dripping with blood, however, as soon as it’s in my grasp he fires a ghoulish arm from the wound and it punctures right into Rin’s stomach. “Rin!”

“Did that make you feel better?” He grimaces. The arm retracts and I push Noihaus away. Rin sheaths his sword, “If you wanna kill me. Kill me. Pick a time and place and I’ll be there. Just promise me this…that no innocent people get hurt!” Noihaus just grumbles and walks away.

After waiting a few seconds to ensure the fight is properly over, I race to Rin’s side “Shit Rin are you ok?” “Y-Yeah I’m ok. I heal pretty quick.” I softly hover my palm over the wound and focus. Think of a golden light. Feel the warmth closing up the wound. When I pull my hand away, only a small cut is left. “I’ve never been able to fully heal things larger than a child…sorry.” Looking up at Rin, his eyes are wide with awe. I step back and tuck the wings away.

“Rin!” It’s Shiemi. When she sees the blood on Rin, she gets concerned and jumps into action. While she and the Twins are conversing, I slip away to my dorm.

——

Later that night, the anxiety of how Rin and Yukio will now treat me eats away at me so much I can’t sleep.

I quietly walk down to the main kitchen, “Ookabok? Are you there?” The little demon pops out of the shadows and grunts a hello. ‘Would it be ok if I had some tea? I don’t mind making it, I just wanted to ask first.’ Ookabok chitters in agreement and begins making the tea. “So, what’s bothering you?” He asks.

I tell him everything. It’s a comfort too. The tea is a sweet, calming chamomile. Ookabok brought out some shortbread too. Walkers. My favourite brand. A part of me feels like the little demon doesn’t fully understand or is even fully paying attention, but it’s nice to say everything out loud anyways. “Hey…sorry to interrupt.” Turning around, I’m met with Rin who’s sheepishly standing in the doorway. ‘Can I join you?’

Ookabok leaves the two of us alone, saying he wants to go to bed. “So…you’re an Angel-“ “Soilder!” I correct a little too harshly ‘Sorry…soldier is the more preferred term. Humans tend to over glorify the term ‘Angel’.’ “So you’re a…Soldier then? How about that.” I take a sip of my tea “And you’re…a son of Satan.” He looks at me confused “A son?” “Yukio” “Oh yeah.”

We sit in awkward silence for a few minutes. “How long have you known your fathers…?” “A few months. Did you always know you’re a …?” “Since I was quite young. It reached a point where it couldn’t be hidden any more.” “So you never picked up that I’m a…?” Rin leads. “No not really. To be honest, I just thought you had ADHD and/or autism and that’s why you act the way you do. And since I’ve also got both it didn’t strike me as weird.” I take a sip of tea. “Huh…cool.”

We sit in not-so-awkward-anymore silence for a few more moments. It’s broken when I sneeze and my wings fluff out of my back. Rin bursts into laughter so hard he’s crying. “Stop it!” I join in the laughter, but still try and tuck them back away “No no, I’m sorry. You can keep them out” Rin isn’t hiding his stares. Though, it’s hard to not at the grey, feathery mounds protruding from my shoulder blades.

“How do they work?” I turn around carefully to demonstrate. It’s a racerback tank so it’s easy to see the shoulder blades. “So, it’s kinda similar to your blade, but instead of steel and a sheath it’s wings and skin flaps that are tattooed. I’m able to ‘retract’ them in a way, like you with your flames.” And so I retract them. They slip into their slots in my skin, disappearing under the flesh and vanishing away.

I turn back around, slightly adjusting my tank as I do. Rin is staring wide eyed again. In pure awe. It turns me a sunset pink at the sight. “Well I uh…should probably get some rest.” “Yeah! Yeah I’m gonna head off too.” We both stand up and leave. It’s not until the doorway where we remember our rooms are next to each other.

Another few minutes of awkward silence. When we reach our doors, Rin breaks it. “You know…I’ve got a tail…” he untucks in from his shirt ‘now we don’t have to hide ourselves anymore.’ And with a smile, we part ways.

——

“Congratulations! You all are officially Exquires!” Mephisto announces triumphant. ‘And as a reward, I’m treating you all to a feast!’

The so called feast wasn’t…well a feast, but it it was paid for by the Director so yay free food! We all eat and talk and for the first time in I gather ever, genuinely enjoy one another’s company. And when I look over at Rin, he’s looking at me, and there’s a spark.

Interest and duty are beginning to conflict.

#rin okumura #rin okumura x oc #ao no exorcist #blue excorsist #fanfic

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chubbology · 3 years

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A Little Incentive

prompt: someone skinny grows chubby on their partner's good cooking and insistence they eat well

From the tempting smell of bacon and syrup that wafted into the room, I knew she’d outdone herself this morning.

“I made breakfast,” she stage-whispered to me. I grinned and turned over in bed, feigning sleepiness even though what I really wanted was to sit right up and take that plate from her hands.

Then my stomach growled and she laughed.

“The others are jealous,” she said. “But I told them they already had a habit of eating breakfast. You’re the one I need to hammer it into, by any means necessary.”

I took a deep breath and sat up in bed, pushing hair out of my face. “Consider me incentivized.” I took the heaping plate of breakfast food that she pushed at me, then the fork, and started into the chocolate chip pancakes, which were half soaked in syrup. Also on the plate lay bacon, eggs, hash browns, a muffin, and…

“French toast sticks, too?”

“As a reward for finishing all your exams! I know you like them.”

I thanked her. She poked my side and smiled fondly at me. “At the beginning of this semester, you would have said this was too much. I hope you know that it makes me the happiest girl in the world that you’re eating properly now.”

In response, I took a bite of extra crispy bacon and groaned in pleasure. As she got ready for the day, I considered her comment. Eating properly. She and I had different definitions of that, or used to at least.

My first two years of college were hard. Working part time, taking hard classes, dealing with an awful roommate. I barely took care of myself. I thought eating properly was eating at all. But then I met her and we hit it off, became friends and then more than friends, then moved in together with a couple more roommates just barely off campus. All the while, she made a point of showing me each day what eating properly meant to her: big meals cooked in the kitchenette or piled onto plates in the dining halls, snacks throughout the day, and never forgetting dessert. It kept her chubby, but she didn’t mind. I certainly didn’t.

“Bye!” I called out as she left for her last day of exams. She seemed confident about how hers had gone so far. Me? Not so much. I was never a good test taker.

I finished my plate down to the crumbs. I went and leisurely washed the dishes. I had pretty much nothing to do today. From the silence coming from the other bedrooms, I knew I had the apartment to myself, too. I could go outside, but it was too hot. And like hell I was going to go to the library again until I absolutely had to. There were always video games, but I stayed up late last night staring at screens, trying to forget my poor performance on my own last exam of the semester. I felt burnt out on everything.

I blinked in confusion when I realized I’d opened the fridge. I closed it. I literally just ate, so I don’t know why I’d…

The next three hours, I spent back in bed. Looking on my phone, resting my eyes, worrying about exam results, and tugging on my pajama pants. They were tight because I was so full. Eventually I decided to do something productive, starting with a shower. Maybe I could drive to a café or something, hang out there.

After showering and dressing (since I wasn’t exactly full anymore, I figured the tightness of my shorts was from bloating) I wandered into the kitchen for something to snack on. The fridge was always well stocked, and I eyed the rest of the batch of muffins in tupperware. I heard her voice in my mind: It makes me happy when you treat yourself.

What the hell. I took out the container, opened it, and took a bite out of the cinnamon raisin muffin. I closed my eyes. Big and sugary and so good. Better than the first one, maybe, because it had cooled off and I could better taste the flavor. I ate another one. And then I treated myself with a third before closing the lid again. There were still eight left.

I tried putting the container back in the fridge, but something stopped me. Go ahead, I heard her say. You don’t eat enough.

Slowly, I opened the container again and ate two more of the muffins. They were just so good. Then I put the container away, firmly slamming the fridge door and biting my lip. Truth was, she stopped telling me I don’t eat enough months ago.

I went back into the bathroom and took a good look at myself, which I’d avoided doing before. Truth was, my shorts were tight because, thanks to my partner’s cooking and our lingering stays at the dining halls and my new penchant for snacking, I had filled out more than a little. I’d put on my own chub. My shirt clung to my sides, which were soft and rounded (Is that why she poked me?), and upon closer inspection, I couldn’t deny my face looked tubbier, too.

I stood in quiet shock for a while, gently pressing my palm to the outward slump of my belly, its natural shape when I didn’t suck it in. (When did I start unconsciously sucking it in?) After a minute of dazedly contemplating my weight, I rummaged around for a dusty scale and stepped on it with bated breath.

My jaw fell open. My whole face, my neck, my ears flushed red, even though there was no one to see me there, finding out I was thirty seven pounds heavier than expected.

Forty pounds? Almost forty pounds? It was impossible. I didn’t look that much bigger.

But she had always said I was too skinny. So maybe twenty of those just filled me in? And then the rest was…extra? Forty pounds.

The surprise waned after a few more minutes of checking myself out in the mirror. I found I wasn’t as upset as society had led me to think I would be.

I did go to a café later that day. My newfound self-awareness didn’t kick back in until after I got a grande frappe and a scone. At my table, I thumbed the belly that now warmed a small part of my lap before eating and sipping my treats anyway.

My shorts felt so tight after a while, I just unbuttoned them and hoped no one would notice.

I spent a few hours there, reading and browsing my laptop and giving my soft belly secretive, intrigued touches before I started thinking about the six remaining muffins at the apartment. When I got back, I found I was in good company.

“I really did good on these,” she said, swallowing. “Want one?”

I took one, trying to hide my sheepishness. Did she guess it was me who ate the five that were missing? Or did she think it was our other roommates? Did she think…

“You want to get a late lunch?” “I think I need new clothes.”

We stared at each other. She chuckled, “Sorry, what?”

I flushed, tugging conspicuously on my shorts, not quite able to find the words. “Need to go shopping.” I’ve gained almost forty pounds. Forty pounds! My throat constricted.

“Oh.”

I looked up at her. “You’re a good cook,” I said, grinning. Still a little embarrassed.

But now she was a bit pink in the face, too. “Yeah, we should go shopping. Um. You aren’t mad. Are you? I just really like to cook and bake, and you really were too skinny and—”

“No, no! I’m not mad. I—”

Am I going to get fat? I wanted to ask her suddenly, and I felt very warm. I’m always eating these days. What if I outgrow the new clothes I buy? What then?

“I hope you know I think you look good,” she blurted. My thoughts ceased. “Really good.”

Suddenly, I was aware I’ve been sucking my belly in again. Would it be weird if I stopped? Just let it...swell out? I took in a deep breath, then let it all out, not sucking in this time. Her wide eyes fixated on my chubby lower belly.

“Thanks,” I said, trying not to be awkward. “To be honest, I only noticed recently that I look…different.”

Her eyes met mine and she looked very adoring. I’m sure my expression was identical. “Just a little. I was surprised how much your appetite grew.”

“Yeah. You still want to get lunch?” I asked. “Kinda feel like the dining hall.”

Kinda feel like going all out.

I won’t get fat.

Only a little, maybe. Not the end of the world.

“Okay,” she squeaked, as if hearing my thoughts. “Good idea. After all my stupid exams, it’s time to treat myself.”

I wholeheartedly agreed. So we went.

I loved how she looked shyly excited the whole time, as I overdid the second and third helpings. It seemed to make her overdo it some, too. Which spurred me to make it a competition, and there we sat together, overeating like a couple of chubby fiends.

“Still think you’re too skinny,” she taunted me, as we left, already discussing plans for dinner.

Thank you to the reader who commissioned this work!

I'd love to write more. Check me out <3 etsy.com/shop/Chubbology

#weight gain #fic #female feeder #nonbinary gainer

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knoxyourself · 3 years

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I went for it

Pairing: Wolfstar (Remus Lupin/Sirius Balck)

Words: 2,7k

Warnings: none I think

(english is not my first language so it's not perfect)

The ‘Gryffindor Pride’ party was incredibly loud, as everyone probably expected. They just won the Quidditch Cup third year in a row, it was a good reason for a party. But then again, one could always find a great reason to party with Gryffindors.

Muggle booze, brought by Mary, and Firewhiskey were flowing like waterfalls, which meant that everyone was having a great time. If not, they were few drinks away from it and soon enough it’d be just fine.

It was probably the last party of the year, right before the exams, so in all honesty everyone wanted to loosen up a little.

That’s why two sixth years were handing out bottles of butterbeer to everyone, who passed their ‘station’ at the table. Sirius and James were never ones to give up some fun, although Sirius had decided to stay sober that night. It didn’t stop him from getting James, who was currently laughing at something with Marlene, incredibly pissed.

Remus silently watched their interaction from the other sofa. He was slightly tipsy himself, but not to the point where he’d have a hangover the next morning. He watched James acting like a goofball in front of Lily – that’s when Remus heard the laugh.

His eyes involuntarily fixated on Sirius’s profile. The black-haired boy looked like he was glowing. His silvery eyes were shimmering with joy, bright smile plastered on his incredibly alluring lips. He realized, that he wanted to know what the boy tasted like, he wanted to examine every single part of Sirius’s body with his fingertips, he wanted Sirius, and he wanted Sirius to acknowledge that fact. Merlin, Remus was definitely feeling the impact of alcohol he consumed. Remus knew that he had a silly crush on the dark-haired boy, he fancied Sirius Black and he was somewhat okay with that, he just hadn’t realized, that his desire was that intense. Sirius was his best friend for fucks sake, he wasn’t keen on ruining it. Feeling a bit overwhelmed, Remus slouched in his place, eyes still eagerly absorbing Sirius’s features. He only shifted his gaze when Lily plumped next to him on the couch.

“You look like you’re having fun,” she said, sarcasm present in her voice. “What’s up?”

“I am having fun.” He retorted rolling his eyes. “I think I’m drunk tho.”

Lily laughed loudly, shaking her head with amusement. She definitely drank more than the light-haired boy.

“Drunk?” she mused. “You’ve had like, what, two butterbeers?”

“I don’t do good with alcohol.”

“That’s bullshit and we both know it.” Lily had a pretty good idea why Remus’s mood suddenly changed. She wasn’t stupid, she could see the longing eyes, hidden smiles, Remus’s blushing whenever Sirius came way too close. They were both more obvious than they thought. “Okay, you don’t have to tell me what’s, or rather who’s, on your mind. I think I already know enough.”

“What d’you mean?” Remus felt his ears heating up.

“Nothing,” she smiled sympathetically, patting his back. “But I think you should talk to him. I have a feeling that you won’t regret it.”

With that said, she was gone, jumping back on to the dance floor.

The moment when Remus’s eyes shifted back to Sirius, Queen’s Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy started playing on full volume. It was Lily’s doing, but Remus would never know that part of the story. He let the girls words sink in to his brain. He knew that he’d have to talk to Sirius at some point, but until that, he’d rather avoid the topic.

When he heard the first notes of the song, Sirius felt a pair of eyes staring at him. He didn’t turn around immediately. Sirius noticed Remus’s gaze earlier and he hoped that it was also the light-haired boy this time. It was a weird feeling, being watched by Remus. It always made Sirius’s stomach twist and he felt like he was drowning. But it was a good kind of drowning, he was drowning in his own feelings. The positive ones. Finally, he gave in and locked eyes with his best friend.

Remus’s eyes were smooth, warm. Almost soothing. When Sirius stared into them, he felt like he was home.

They were gazing into each other’s eyes for quite some time. Sirius needed more. He knew that Remus didn’t feel the same, but to wish was not a crime, right? He shook his head and tapped James’s shoulder.

“Prongs, I’m gonna go to Remus, you’ll be okay?” he asked the boy.

James wasn’t anywhere near sober, quite the opposite actually. He was currently arguing with equally pissed Marlene and Mary over the latter’s sexual experiences. He turned to face Sirius when he felt the tap.

“Wha-? Oh, Re-mus, sure.” James slured, sly grin forming on his lips. “Go get ‘em tiger!” He threw fist in the air while both girls laughed their asses off.

Sirius rolled his eyes in amusement, he’s never seen James this drunk.

“Don’t let him touch any more firewhiskey Marls.” Sirius looked pleadingly at the blonde.

“You are notme mother, Black.” James stumbled trying to stand up, and fell face first on the table. That of course caused another fit of laughter from the girls and a pained groan from James.

While Sirius tried to get rid of his drunk company, Remus found himself talking to a sixth year Ravenclaw. Justin Haywood sat next to him on the couch and offered him Remus’s third butterbeer.

Justin was slightly shorter than Sirius but equally good looking. He had a define jawline, deep emerald eyes that were now glossy from all the alcohol, and a blond buzzcut. He, unlike Sirius, played Quidditch so his shoulders were much broader. It suited him well.

Remus knew Justin from his Advanced Charms study group, they got along quite well. With Justin everything was easy, there wasn’t any distracting emotions, he could just talk to him and admire his physical appearance, not like with Sirius. Sirius was complicated, Remus never really knew what the dark-haired boy thought about him.

“I don’t think I understood our last assignment correctly.” Justin sighed relying slightly on Remus’s shoulder. They were going through last Charms lesson, really interesting topic to dig into during a party. “There’s shit-load of theory.”

Justin apparently was much more full-mouthed after couple of drinks. Not that Remus minded, he wasn’t a saint himself.

“I’m sure you got it just fine,” the light-haired boy laughed gingerly. “But I can help you if you’re really that worried.”

At that point Sirius finally left James with the girls. He searched the room for Remus and that’s when he saw it. Justin’s arm around Remus’s shoulders, the Ravenclaw boy leaning slightly on Remus. He came closer so he could listen on their conversation.

“So,” Haywood started with a pleased smile. “Hogsmeade this weekend?”

Unfortunately, form his place Sirius couldn’t see Remus’s face, only his back, which tensed slightly after Justin’s question.

“Oh, I um- I thought we could go over it on the study group meeting?”

Sirius wondered what was this all about, but he didn’t want to expose himself just yet.

“Well, it’s a hell of a work, I think we can meet up one on one, y’know?” Remus nodded his head, still a little tense. “So, Hogsmeade?”

“I’m actually going with James, Sirius and Peter.” Said Remus. “Sorry.”

“Aw, c’mon man!” Justin groaned playfully. “I’m sure Potter and his bitches can manage one day without you.”

Remus laughed stiffly when Justin pulled him even closer to his chest.

That was probably when Sirius lost it. Haywood was way too close to Remus, he didn’t like it. He clenched his fists and shoved them into the pockets of his jean jacket. After little to no thinking he stepped right in front of the two sixth years.

“I’m truly moved Haywood, that you care ‘bout my well being.” He sneered. “Problem is, Hogsmeade is kind of a tradition for us.”

Justin looked up lazily.

“Bullshit, you’ve missed lots of Hogsmeade trips.” He said defiantly.

“Doesn’t change the fact that Moony made plans with us first so you can kindly fuck off.”

Now it was Remus’s turn to grow mildly annoyed. He freed himself from Justin’s embrace and stood up in front of Sirius.

“What the hell Padfoot?! I can speak for myself.” He growled and then turned to face Justin. “I’m sorry Justin, but he’s right. He’s incredibly nosy, but he’s right. I can’t just cancel it, I already promised Peter I’ll go with him to Honydukes while we’re all there.”

Justin looked really disappointed for a moment, but then he just smiled brightly at Remus and also got up from the couch.

“Nah, it’s cool Remmy. We can go next time.” He caressed Remus’s cheek and disappeared in the crowd.

“Moony-“

“Don’t. Say. A. Word.” Remus cut him off sharply. “Why did you feel the need to speak on my behalf?”

Sirius didn’t answer, instead he just followed Remus through the portrait out of the common room.

“Maybe I wanted to go with him.” Remus stated sternly.

“Did you?” Sirius looked up at the boy when he finally caught up to him. “You wanted to go with him?”

Remus wouldn’t dare to say that, no, he didn’t want to go to Hogsmeade with Justin fucking Haywood. He wanted to go with Sirius. So instead of answering the question, Remus pretended not to hear.

“Great,” Sirius sighed annoyed. “Besides, I don’t really appreciate being called James’s bitch. If anything, James would definitely be my bitch.”

“Yeah sure, forgot what a princess you are.” Remus laughed despite himself. “You got any cigarettes on you?”

Sirius did a quick search through his pockets to discover that he did in fact had a pack of cigarettes. He pulled them out in triumph.

“Great. I need one.” Remus started walking up the stairs to Astronomy Tower. “You comin’?”

“You’re not mad anymore?” Sirius asked anxiously. He hated when Remus was mad at him, it always resulted in some nasty sleepless nights.,

Remus sighed heavily when they reached the top.

“I wasn’t mad in the first place.” He said after a while. “I was annoyed.”

“Well either way, I’m sorry.” Sirius handed him a cigarette. “I shouldn’t have eavesdrop or talk like I knew what you wanted.”

The light-haired boy nodded, smiling in Sirius’s direction.

“I think what annoyed me the most, was the fact that you actually knew what I wanted.” He mused. Sirius furrowed his brows questioningly, so Remus continued. “I didn’t want to go to Hogsmeade with Justin Haywood. I’d much rather hang out with my friends.”

“Good to know.” Sirius said, lighting both of their cigarettes. “You should really start going for what you really want. You deserve to be happy, you know?”

They were smoking in silence for several minutes. Sirius was admiring Remus from the corner of his eyes. Everyone knew, that Remus Lupin with a cigarette was a sight you’d want to see. It wasn’t unseen or unheard of, but it was definitely rare. And it was absolutely beautiful. It was bringing out two different, almost conflicted sides of the boy. His soft sweaters would always smell like smoke after, which changed his entire aesthetic immediately. From the soft looking-sweet-well mannered-nerdy guy that everyone knew and adored, Remus was becoming the fourth marauder, troublemaker who only a few people got to see every day. Sirius of course knew, that he was still the same guy, it was just his aura and how other people perceived him was changing, but it still was, truly, remarkable (and it was turning him on quite a bit). The way Lupin’s lips were curling around the rolled paper, almost like the cigarettes were made perfectly for his curved lips. The way smoke fell from his mouth, floating near his chin for a little longer, like it wanted to stay with him. And the smell of burning chocolate, warm and rich. In conclusion – Remus Lupin smoking cigarettes, Sirius’s cigarettes especially, was something that the dark-haired boy would willingly watch till the day he dies.

While smoking, Remus could only think about one thing. Sirius’s reaction was way out of his character. Sure, the boy was chaotic, blunt and incredibly hotheaded, impulsive, but he and Justin seemed to get along just fine before the party, even more, Sirius commented on the Ravenclaw’s Quidditch talent few times, they sometimes chatted in corridors. So what changed? Maybe, just maybe… No, he couldn’t get his hopes too high.

Remus needed answers. That’s why, when their cigarettes were almost finished, he spoke up.

“Why did you do that tho?” he asked, fully turning his body so he’d face Sirius.

“I did what?” Sirius asked visibly confused.

“Reacted that way.” Remus rolled his eyes.

“He was flirting with you, if you didn’t notice.” Sirius mumbled and Remus’s heart skipped a bit. “You were a bit tense, so I stepped in. He deserved it tho, that guy’s a git, you can do better.”

“What do you mean?” Remus asked slightly confused.

“I mean, that you don’t have to limit yourself to just okay guys. And girls. You can date people, that you really like. You just have to start taking what you want. You deserve love, Moony. Don’t settle on guys like Justin just because they show interest in you.”

Remus was so stunned by Sirius’s rant, that he didn’t really know what to say. So he said the first thing that came to his mind. Why was this boy doing it to him?

“I thought you liked Justin.”

“Haywood?” Sirius snorted, he stubbed their cigarettes with his shoe and shifted his attention back to Remus. “He’s a fucking narcissist. And he’s build like a truck.”

“Truck?” Remus laughed, putting his hand on Sirius’s shoulder. He didn’t eve realized they were that close. “I happen to think that he’s quite fit.” He said as he was quite obviously checking Sirius out, love pouring out of his eyes.

“Oh, do you, now?” Sirius’s smile dropped slightly. Remus couldn’t believe that this boy could be so dense. He decided to see, how far he could go with this.

“I do, he’s a really fit bloke.” He took another step closer to Sirius. “Objectively looking, that is.”

“You know any other fit blokes?” Sirius gulped.

That was it, Remus was either fully going for it, or he was running away from his feeling as he always did. He was really close to doing the latter, but then he remembered Lily’s words from earlier. Then there was also Sirius’s behavior. Maybe there was a chance? He had to know.

Fuck it, he thought, I’m going for it.

“Fit? Yeah, but I’d rather call him beautiful.” He tried to make his voice sound as confident as he could. Their chest’s were now only centimeters away. “But I don’t think he’s got the same opinion ‘bout me.”

“Well that’s some bullshit.” Sirius breathed shakily. The dark-haired boy never seemed that nervous, Remus noted. “Everyone thinks you’re stunning.”

“You think so?” Remus whispered, his gaze dropping to Sirius’s lips for barely a second.

“Yeah. I do.” Sirius nodded eagerly. “You should totally go for it, you never know until you try it, right?”

“Right.”

This time Remus’s eyes lingered on the other boy’s lips longer. It wasn’t like in all those tacky romantic books that Lily adored so much. There wasn’t any slow-mo moment, the world didn’t magically disappear or went completely quiet. The opposite actually. Remus was extra aware of everything, every little sound was echoing in his head, he could hear his own heart pounding. Everything was screaming do it!And Sirius looked so fucking beautiful, constellations of stars locked safely in his silver eyes. Before he could register anything else, Remus was kissing Sirius.

Remus was kissing Sirius.

After all this time of hopelessly dreaming about it, he was finally doing it. He was kissing the Sirius Black.

And Sirius was actually kissing him back.

It wasn’t perfect, there was no fireworks, no orchestra playing in the background. It was rather messy, chaotic and rushed. Just two teenage boys kissing at the top of a tower in the middle of the night. But it was the best feeling in the world.

But like everything, it had to stop at some point.

Sirius gently pushed him back. Not far tho, just so he could rest his forhead against Remus’s.

“What was that?” he asked in a weak, happy voice.

Remus didn’t even had to think twice about the answer.

“I went for it.”

#wolfstar #wolfstar headcanon #wolfstar fluff #wolfstar first kiss #wolfstar au #remus lupin #sirius black #atyd #gryffindor #house party #lgbtq #lgbt headcanons #marauders era #marauders #james potter #lily evans

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davidpastrsnack · 4 years

Text

three times brady stayed quiet, one time he didn’t - brady tkachuk

a/n: i have such a soft spot for brady and this is the result. some really soft friends to lovers, but i also left the possibility for a smuttier part 2 if you guys are interested. i hope you enjoy (especially my fellow brady girls) and please let me know what you think!

word count: 5618

one

After just barely getting through your final assignments of the last grueling week of school, it was finally time for the best part of the year: summer with the Tkachuks. Your dad grew up with Keith outside of Boston, the two maintaining a close relationship despite the distance that kept them apart for so long. For as long as you could remember, you and your siblings had spent the majority of the summer months with them, either on the lakes of Missouri or the oceans of Cape Cod.

The busy hum of voices and speakers was all you heard, your tired body dragging through the airport, iced coffee in hand hoping it would give you even just another ounce of energy. You finally reached your gate, sitting down on the cool leather seat to wait for your boarding call.

Your siblings were already in St. Louis, having finished school before you, and you were the last one to arrive before the commencing weekend of the summer. You knew you were in for a wild ride if the Snapchat stories of your older brother and Matthew getting up to no good were any indication.

Just as you adjusted your headphones and felt your eyelids flutter shut, your phone buzzed, pulling you from your daze.

Brady: I got held up here for another day, but should be there tomorrow

Brady: Don’t miss me too much

You rolled your eyes at the screen, laughing as you saw his words and your brain automatically translated them into his voice. You considered all of the Tkachuks to be like family, but Brady was different, he always had been. Since day one he was constantly looking out for you, even more so than Matthew and your brother. He always had an eye on you, that eye becoming more and more threatening to everyone else as he grew into his now 6’4”, 200lbs frame.

Don’t worry, I’ll have Matthew to keep me company :)

You smiled as you typed out your response, throwing back exactly what he had dished out. You couldn’t deny that your relationship had become more flirtatious over the recent years, but you always assumed it was just the teasing nature of the Tkachuk household. If he was going to chirp you, you were going to chirp right back. But the banter had always flowed seamlessly, both of you knowing the other so well. You weren’t always clear on the motivation behind some of his comments, but it didn’t hurt to have a little fun with him.

You finally boarded the plane, your flight not taking long before you were stepping out in the thick Missouri air. To say you were exhausted was an understatement, your eyes barely staying open as you searched for the black Audi you knew would be arriving any minutes. Just a few moments later you saw the luxury sedan turn the corner, a brown mop of curls sitting behind the wheel.

“There she is,” Matthew yelled, pulling you in for a hug after stepping out of the front seat.

“Hi Matthew,” you hummed, “Thanks for getting me.”

“Of course, Y/N, anything for my future sister-in-law,” he teased, that cocky smirk on full display while he grabbed your suitcase.

You didn’t even acknowledge his comment, moving right along to get in the car and ask him how his season was. You were far from a stranger to his jokes, but you were not in the mood today and he seemed to pick up on it. So he gave it up for the ride, instead catching up on how you were doing otherwise since he had last seen you. All jokes aside, Matthew truly cared for you like family, especially considering he was dead serious about you eventually being his sister-in-law.

After stopping for food on the way, you finally arrived at the house, Matthew pulling into the lit driveway as you took off your seatbelt. Chantal was waiting by the front door, immediately giving you a tight hug when you walked in. She was basically your second mother, always taking care of you as if you were one of her own.

“Y/N! How are you, sweetie?” she exclaimed, urging you to follow her into the kitchen.

“I’m good,” you responded while sitting down at the counter next to Matthew.

“She’s exhausted mom,” Matthew deadpanned before you could continue.

You rolled your eyes at his words, a smile growing on your lips as you quickly fell back into the comfort of this home.

“I’m okay, really,” you assured Chantal.

“Oh honey, come on,” she grabbed your backpack and gestured for you to follow her upstairs. “All of the guestrooms are full right now with Matthew’s friends but they’re leaving tonight. Just go ahead into Brady’s room, I’m sure he told you he’s still in Ottawa until tomorrow.”

You nodded, “Yeah, he did.”

She led you down the hall, as if you didn’t know exactly where you were going, and opened the door to his room. The same hockey memorabilia was scattered across the walls and the closet was slightly open, the clothes he left here during the season poking out.

“Just relax in here, sweetie. The sheets are clean and there are towels in the bathroom. I’ll check in with you in a little bit, okay?”

“Thank you so much,” you smiled, pulling her in for another hug before she headed back downstairs.

No matter how much time you had spent in this room, something about being in there without Brady felt wrong. But the exhaustion of the travel day and the past week didn’t let you think about it too much, instead telling you to go take a shower and change into fresh clothes. You didn’t mean for it to happen, but the second you laid across the bed you were down for the count.

-----

When Brady opened his door after arriving home the next morning, his jaw nearly hit the floor. Chantal told him that you were in there, but there was no preparing himself for the sight in front of him. You were still fast asleep, but the covers were mostly thrown off your body. He smiled to himself as he remembered that you always get too hot while you sleep. The oversized t-shirt you were wearing was bunched at your waist, your tiny sleep shorts riding up your hips giving him the perfect view of your ass. Your head was nuzzled into his pillow, your hands resting in front of you as if you should be holding someone and your lips pouted as you slept. He had seen you asleep countless times before, but something about you being in his bed waiting for him like this was taking his breath away today. He thought about what it would be like if things were different. He could slide under the covers behind you, slip his rough hands around the soft skin of your waist, kiss your collarbone and neck as you giggled in his grasp, moving one of his hands lower and lower until-

“Fuck,” he mumbled, losing grip of his phone as he was distracted by his awe of you, the metal slipping out of his hand and falling against the hardwood floor. He scrambled to grab it without dropping his bags or waking you up. But it was too late, your sleeping frame stirred at the sudden noise, lifting your head to see what it was.

“Brady?” you questioned, your voice laced with sleep and your eyes squinting as they adjusted to the morning light pouring through the windows.

“Yeah, it’s me. Sorry I just- mom told me you were in here,” he spoke, afraid it looked like he had just been staring at you, which of course he had been.

“Don’t be sorry Brades, it’s your room,” you laughed as you sat up, adjusting your shirt when you realized how exposed you were.

He laughed too, trying to shake off whatever awkwardness had infected him this morning and not let his eyes trail down your frame.

“Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to come give me a hug?” you grinned.

Brady shook his head smiling as he made his way towards you, sitting on the edge of the mattress and pulling you in. His body relaxed as you wrapped yourself around him, your touch and scent overwhelming his senses.

You could feel the tension leaving his shoulders as your hands traced the curls at the base of his neck, “You okay?” you whispered.

He pulled back at your words, piercing blue eyes meeting yours. “I’m fine,” he paused, wondering if he should come clean about everything right now. But he decided it wasn’t worth freaking you out on day one of the summer, “I just missed you, that’s all.”

A soft smile crept on your lips, hearing him say that he missed you as much as you missed him warming your heart.

“Come on, I’m hungry,” you said as you grabbed his hand, a playful scoff leaving his mouth as he trailed behind you towards the stairs, the energy between the two of you starting to return to normal.

two

After everyone had finally arrived and settled in, it was time for the first house party of the season. The mere thought of this moment had given you the motivation to finish your exams, so it went without saying that you could not be more excited. Keith and Chantal were out of town for the weekend, putting Matthew in charge of making sure everyone stayed safe. You were finishing getting ready in one of the guest rooms, which you had almost moved into for the summer after the one night in Brady’s. You went for a simple outfit, a white top with jeans and sneakers before heading downstairs to join the growing crowd.

You were surrounded by faces as soon as you made your way down, some familiar and some not. Your eyes scanned the room for your friends, knowing your close friend Emily had already arrived. You finally found her standing in one of the corners and you turned to go meet them.

“Long time no see,” you beamed when you arrived at their circle, the girls jumping to hug you as they saw you for the first time since last August. It was great to catch up with everyone, but you quickly realized that you forgot to get a drink.

“Em, I’m gonna go grab a drink,” you spoke to which she nodded.

“I’ll come with,” she urged, reaching for your hand as you both walked towards the kitchen.

“So you look hot tonight,” she grinned, speaking in your ear so you could hear over the music. “I bet he finally makes his move later.”

“Who?” you challenged, but she didn’t need to say another word for you to know who she was talking about.

“Y/N, please just save it,” Emily rolled her eyes, “Look, he’s already drooling over you,” she gestured towards where Brady was sitting around a table with Matthew and some of their old friends from hockey. She was right, he was looking right at you, waving when you made eye contact. You gave a small wave back before quickly turning your body away from him to face Emily.

“He always watches me at parties,” you reasoned.

“Yeah, because he’s in love with you,” she scoffed, pouring two drinks into red solo cups.

“Because he’s a good guy, Emily,” you rebutted before taking a far too large sip of whatever she made.

Meanwhile, across the room, Brady was facing the same kind of comments from his friends. As soon as he saw you cross the room with Emily he couldn’t peel his eyes away. You were practically glowing, your smile wide as the stress from the school year finally seemed to disappear from your mind.

“Really Tkachuk?” he heard from next to him, his head snapping away from you to look at the voice.

“What?” he questioned, his challenge laced with attitude.

“Y/N? Still?” his friend Jack responded.

Brady just shook his head in annoyance. He didn’t have the energy for this conversation tonight.

“As long as the sky is blue, Brady will be falling at the feet of Y/N,” Matthew chimed in, a smirk gracing his lips as he hid behind his solo cup.

Brady maintained his silence, hoping they would get bored and move on, but not so fast.

“So you aren’t hitting it?”

He thought he was mad before, but nothing compared to the pure anger Brady felt at this comment. It was Nick, a kid he had never liked through all the years they played together in St. Louis. He was fuming, Matthew swore he could see smoke coming out of his ears as he waited for his brother's response, getting ready to step in if necessary.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Nick?” Brady started, turning his body towards him and sitting up straight. “Am I hitting it? You’re talking about my childhood best friend, show some fucking respect.”

Nick looked stunned, his eyes wide as Brady glared at him. “Dude, I-,”

“Don’t,” he interrupted, moving to stand up so he towered over him. “You wanna know why no girl will ever come within ten feet of you? It’s because of shit like this, Nick. You’re a complete asshole and you don’t deserve a thing from any woman,” he scolded.

By this point, Brady had drawn the attention of many, nearly all of the guests staring at the commotion, including you.

Your face dropped as you saw him yelling, concern written all over your face as your brows furrowed in his direction. He finally seemed to calm down, his eyes looking defeated as they locked with yours. With one more look at Nick, he shook his head in disgust before walking towards the back of the house, the door slamming shut behind him.

The room was nearly silent, everyone looking at each other to see if they knew what just happened.

“Everything’s fine guys,” Matthew urged, the party resuming at his words. Your eyes met his and before you could even make it over to ask what that was he was gesturing towards the door for you to follow Brady.

You nodded, discarding your drink on the counter and rushing to him. You slowly opened the backdoor, searching for his blond curls. You quickly found him alone on the patio, sitting on the outdoor couch with his head thrown back against the cushion, and his eyes closed.

“Brady?” you whispered.

His eyes shot open at your voice, “Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath. Even though he knew it was impossible, part of him was hoping you didn’t see that.

You didn’t say anything but rather moved towards him, stepping over his legs so you could sit next to him. He stayed silent, just swinging his arm around your shoulders and tugging you into his frame. You sighed as your head rested against his chest, waiting for him to talk when he was ready.

After almost ten minutes, Brady finally spoke, “Nick is an asshole,” he muttered.

You couldn’t help but let out a small giggle at his words, lifting your head to look at him, but he was still staring straight ahead. He didn’t know if he could keep it together if his eyes met yours.

“Brady,” you muttered, “What happened?”

“He just said something I didn’t like.”

“Come on, Brades,” you pleaded, hoping he would finally give in and tell you what happened.

But instead, he shook his head, “I don’t want to talk about it, okay?” he snapped, instantly regretting his reaction when he felt your body flinch at his tone. He sighed, letting out a breath it felt like he had been holding for hours, “I’m sorry, Y/N. I just-”

“It’s okay,” you whispered. You had no idea what was going on with him, but regardless, it was clear that he needed you. You laid your head back down on his shoulder, smiling to yourself as you felt him press a kiss to the top of your hair.

three

It had felt like forever since you had been on a proper date, the college lifestyle not always being conducive to it. But now here you were, getting ready to go out to dinner with the guy next door, Tommy. The two of you had been friendly for years, getting to know him more and more with each summer you spent with the Tkachuks. You definitely were surprised when he asked you out, but you didn’t see the harm in taking him up on his offer.

And to be completely honest, part of you was getting frustrated at your situation with Brady. It was a cycle that started over each summer. You entered June denying that there was even a hint of anything more than friendship, but by July you were sucked right back under his spell, until August came and you were ripped apart from each other yet again. Clearly nothing was different about this year, so it was time you tried to move on and enjoy your summer in, well, other ways.

You slipped into a dress, casual but still cute, and tied your white sneakers. You walked over to your window to see both Matthew and Brady’s cars sitting in the driveway. Great, you thought. This would be much more painless if they weren’t home, but of course, the world was not on your side. You did one last hair and makeup check before grabbing your bag and heading down the stairs, feigning total confidence as you grew closer to the boys.

They were laying across the couch playing video games, both of their eyes darting straight to you as you tried to sneak out the front door.

“It’s rude not to say goodbye,” you heard Matthew yell from behind you.

“Fuck,” you silently mouthed, turning to move into the living room where they sat.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you guys there!” you lied through your teeth.

Matthew’s face scrunched up at your excuse, knowing there was no possible way you didn’t see them.

“Where are you going?” Brady asked, his voice much softer than his brothers, almost like he knew what he was about to hear.

“Um, I’m going to dinner with Tommy,” you said, trailing off at the end as the awkwardness set in the room.

No matter how much you tried to deny it, you saw the way Brady’s face fell at your words. The guilt suddenly hit you like a truck, but then again it wasn’t like he was doing anything to change the status of your relationship.

“Tommy?” Matthew questioned, his brows furrowed in confusion.

“Yeah,” you stalled, “I don’t know, he asked me and I said yes.”

“Interesting,” he muttered, looking at his younger brother who was pretending to be enthralled in the game.

“Alright well, I’ll see you guys later,” you said, standing as you waited for Brady’s response, but it never came.

Matthew sensed the obvious tension, doing whatever he could to break it, “Have fun Y/N, but not too much,” he teased.

You rolled your eyes, finally moving to open the door, not at all minding that it slammed behind you.

As soon as you were out the door, Matthew pulled the controller out of Brady’s hand. He couldn’t watch this anymore.

“What the fuck, Matt?” he shouted, his emotions high after watching you leave.

“No, I should be asking you that,” he threw back. “What the fuck are you two doing?”

Brady sighed, running his hands over his face before holding his heavy head in his palms. He didn’t know what he was doing. For so many years he was terrified of telling you how he felt. If you didn’t reciprocate his feelings, he didn’t know if your friendship could ever recover and he was not taking that risk. But this year it was all too much, you were perfect for each other and everyone around you knew it too. How could he blame you for trying to find someone else when he couldn’t even muster up the courage to tell you the truth?

“I don’t know, Matt,” he started, his words muffled by his hands, tears prickling the back of his eyes.

Despite teasing him about you for so long, Matthew’s heart broke as he saw his brother in so much distress over this.

“Just tell her. I promise you it will work out,” he encouraged, placing a comforting hand on Brady’s shoulder. “Anyone with eyes can tell that you two are made for each other. It’s gross, actually.”

Brady let out a laugh at Matthew’s chirp, finally picking his head up, “But now I have Tommy to worry about.”

Matthew scoffed, laughing as he spoke, “Yeah, because Y/N really seems like the type to throw away her entire relationship with you over one date with Tommy, of all people.”

-----

Your night was going well, but you just couldn’t shake the look on Brady’s face from your mind; he was hurt.

Tommy was sweet, making you laugh throughout dinner, but you knew you had no intention of seeing him, like this, again. After leaving the restaurant, he suggested you got ice cream and walked around the city, to which you agreed. You felt bad for leading him on, but part of you was dreading arriving back to the house. You were sitting on a bench taking in the view of the city and talking about plans for the year when you felt him shift his body closer to yours. His intentions were clear, and your heart dropped at the realization that you were going to have to let him down much earlier than anticipated.

Just as you were trying to find the right words to tell him, he placed his hand high on your thigh and he leaned in to kiss you. You immediately flinched, pulling your face far away from his.

“Tommy, I- I’m sorry,” you whispered.

A dark chuckle came out of his mouth and you could feel the energy change, the air growing thick with tension.

“Seriously?”

His much larger frame than yours suddenly became quite intimidating as he leaned over you, clearly not taking the rejection well.

“I’m sorry,” you continued, “I just don’t think this is going to happen.”

“Unbelievable,” he shook his head at you, your body pushing back into the bench in an attempt to get as far away from him as possible. “This is about Tkachuk, isn’t it? I should have known you would only be interested in the fame and money,” he mumbled with another laugh.

His words slapped you across the face, your eyes burning as you felt the tears try to push their way out. In all the years you had known him, you never had the slightest idea that Tommy had such a cruel side to him.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” you rebutted, “Get away from me, Tommy.”

“No problem, darling,” he smiled, standing up and walking away, leaving you stranded on the street downtown.

Your head fell into your hands, the cold evening breeze riding under your dress. Your mind instantly started listing all the reasons why this was your fault, but deep down you knew it wasn’t. After sitting there in defeat for a few moments, you finally pulled out your phone, dialing the only number that ever mattered.

It seemed like hours later when you finally saw the black SUV pull up on the street in front of you. Before you could even stand up, Brady was running out of the car towards you. Your emotions got the best of you once he was by your side, your body collapsing into his as the tears fell.

“What the hell did he do?” he questioned while rocking you back and forth in his arms.

You couldn’t find the words to answer.

“Y/N, you’re freezing,” he spoke as he felt your cool skin against his, “Come on,” he urged, grasping your hand to guide you to the car.

Once you were inside the warm car, he reached into the back seat to find a sweatshirt, handing you the soft material.

“Thank you,” you whisper, scared your voice would betray you as you slipped the fabric over your head, the scent of his cologne comforting you right away.

“I’m gonna kill him,” Brady hissed, his knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel.

“No, you’re not Brady,” you warned, “I had a good night until I didn’t. We just had different ideas of how it was going to end,” you scoffed, a sarcastic laugh slipping through your lips.

Brady shook his head, pausing to glance over at you while he was stopped at a light. You were resting against the cool glass, his sweatshirt pooling around your hips, the fabric of your dress peeking from beneath it. The light finally turned, your face now illuminated in green and he only had one thought.

He would never treat you like that.

plus one

Despite his conversation with Matthew, Brady still had yet to say anything to you. You assured him time after time that you were okay after Tommy, but he didn’t want his confession to seem reactionary. You deserved more than that.

The plan tonight was for everyone to go out to one of the hotspots in town, but you weren’t feeling it. Everything that happened the night before had you even more consumed with your thoughts about Brady, and you needed a night of just nothing. The voices from downstairs carried while the boys were getting ready to leave, their laughter making you smile as you walked into the kitchen. They were so wound up all year long and it was refreshing to see them truly relaxing.

You drew their attention right away as you entered the room, their brows furrowed in confusion as they took in the sweats you were wearing.

“Y/N!” one of them howled, “We’re going soon, hurry up!”

You laughed as you turned to face him, the voice belonging to Jack.

“I’m not going Jack,” you explained, opening the fridge to look for something to satisfy your late-night craving.

“But you have to come, you’re so fun,” he whined.

“I promise I won’t be that fun tonight. Just go enjoy yourselves, I’ll be here waiting to make sure you all get back in the house alive,” you jested.

“I’ll stay,” you heard from behind you. You didn’t even have to look to know who it was.

You finally rotated your body, meeting his gaze right away. He looked good. His black jeans hugged his thighs perfect, the matching black t-shirt fitting around his biceps like a glove. He towered over your, those bright blue eyes piercing into yours. He was close enough for you to take in his cologne, the scent immediately clouding your senses.

“I’m fine, Brady,” you reasoned, shaking yourself out of your daze, “Seriously, go.”

He didn’t speak right away, instead he gave you a knowing look. You gave him the same look right back, challenging him to go against you.

“Matt,” he called, not breaking eye contact, “I’m gonna stay.”

You rolled your eyes at his stubbornness but you were just thankful that you had a reason to look away, praying that the heat you were feeling hadn’t made its way onto your cheeks.

“Alright,” Matthew responded, not even bothering to question the two of you at this point.

The boys flooded the front door, all yelling goodbye before they piled into the Ubers waiting outside. A heavy silence fell over the house, your body leaning against the kitchen counter as you waited for Brady to say something.

“I’m just gonna change,” he spoke, gesturing to the staircase. “Put a movie on, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, your voice barely above a whisper.

Just a few minutes later he returned, dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt. You were laying across the couch, the movie already playing as he sat down next to you.

“Cold?” he asked, already knowing that you were by the way you wrapped your arms around your middle.

“A little,” you mumbled, smiling as he covered the two of you in a blanket, squeezing your frame as he pulled it closer to his own.

You stayed like that for a while, your body resting nearly completely on top of his, your leg swung over his lap and your head nuzzled into his chest. Any tension that was there before seemed to have disappeared, both of you returning to your normal states.

But just seconds later, the screen flashed to a bedroom, the two main characters in the middle of what could be referred to only as a passionate, graphic sex scene. You immediately felt Brady tense beneath you, your cheeks flushing bright red at his response. It took everything within you not to react in any other way, but it felt like your entire body was on fire, begging to be touched. The sounds of the woman’s moans echoed off the walls, her face contorting in pleasure as the man continued. There was no denying that the image triggered a throbbing pressure between your legs, your brain fighting your body’s instinct to grind against his thigh.

Brady’s stomach dropped when he processed what was happening, the woman undressing on the screen making his mind wander to doing the same thing with you. He wanted to touch you like that, he wanted to make you scream his name like that, make you fall apart like that because no one knew you as well as he did. But his imagination was far too vivid, and he internally cursed himself as he felt his pants become tighter and tighter.

This has to be the longest sex scene in the history of all film, you thought to yourself as it continued, seemingly never-ending. Your hand was growing sore from its position under your head, so you gently shifted your body in hopes of getting more comfortable, but what you got was something else entirely.

Your breath hitched when you felt it, unable to disguise your reaction. You were situated over his lap, your lower thigh brushing against his crotch and you could feel just how hard he had become beneath you. You froze, not knowing what to do or say, if anything at all.

“Y/N,” he whispered, preparing to apologize, afraid he had made you so uncomfortable that he couldn’t recover.

You knew he was beyond embarrassed, but something inside you had been ignited and you couldn’t ignore it any longer. Before you could talk yourself out of it, you swung your hips over his, moving to straddle him while you grabbed his face, pulling it to yours. He tensed again in pure shock, but it didn’t take long for him to relax against you, his hands circling your waist as he pushed you back down into his lap. Your lips moved together in perfect synchrony, a small whimper slipping out from your mouth as he bit your bottom lip between his teeth. He groaned into you at the sound, his hands sliding lower so he could grind you into his length, in desperate need of hearing you more. You had one hand tugging at the nape of his neck, the blond curls feeling like silk between your fingers, while the other slipped underneath his shirt, running your cool fingertips across his flexing abs.

You were both so lost in the moment, ready to rip each other's clothes off at any second when Brady finally pulled back.

“Wait,” he gasped, running his large hands across your thighs as he gathered his thoughts.

Your breathing was labored, trying to catch your breath as you took in the sight below you. His lips were pink and swollen, his cheeks had a bright red tinge, and his blues eyes were staring at you in awe.

“What?” you questioned, insecurity suddenly flooding your mind, your body separating from his as you leaned away.

“No no no,” he cooed, urging you to come back close to him. You obliged, your eyes scanning his face in hopes of deciphering what he was thinking.

“I just- if we’re going to do this,” he gestured between your bodies, “We have to do... this,” he whispered as he looked up at you, what he meant perfectly clear to you. “I want you, but I want all of you.”

You smiled at his words, the anxiety washing off his face as he saw your reaction.

“Brady, I have wanted this for longer than I can even remember,” you beamed, your hands cupping his cheeks, thumbing running over the soft skin. “I want all of you, too.”

“Yeah?” he grinned.

“Yeah,” you laughed.

He pulled you back down to meet his lips, your teeth clashing as you both smiled into the kiss.

“Well then,” he smirked, “If you don’t mind, I’m taking you upstairs.”

He wrapped his palms around your thighs, holding you as he stood up. You shrieked at the sudden movement, laughing as your legs circled his waist. He held you impossibly close to his body, terrified to let you go now that he had you.

“Please, Brady,” you whined against his skin, “Take me upstairs.”

“Fuck,” he breathed out.

That was all he needed to hear to rush up to his room, more than ready to show you exactly how much he had loved you since day one.

part two here

#brady tkachuk #brady tkachuk imagine #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #my writing

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khaleesiofalicante · 3 years

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Hello Dani.

I wish I were here with some cute Malec fan arts to show you instead of what I'm about to say. But I'm not. I guess I just need to talk to someone. I'm sorry if I'm bothering you. You don't have to answer me. I guess the fact that I was comfortable enough to tell you these helps me enough. To at least know that I'm no longer the only person who knows these anymore. To know that it isn't a secret I have to bare alone. Cause I'm fucking tired of it.

Ok, here's the thing. Here, in my country, students attend a national exam at the end of elementary school. Just before entering middle school, at 11. The results of this test show whether you can enter some special schools that are built to guide and educate the students who got accepted. The students society thinks are smarter than the others. As far as I can remember, I knew I should take that test and get accepted. When I was a child my mother told me about a long time ago, when she and my father were at high school. My father had wanted to become a doctor at the time. He'd tried and studied hard and eventually gotten accepted at the medicine school. But back then, it had been very important for the students studying important majors at university- like medicine- to have a good social image and other people's opinion about them mattered a lot. And at that time, my father's family had had some kind of quarrels and fights going on with some neighbor families, and thus when those people were asked about my father personality, they've talked shit about him and he got rejected. He had to become a teacher instead. I was just a child back then, but even as a child, I could see how my father always yearned for what he'd lost. The way he talked about how good of a job it is, how doctors can help people a lot, and how if I'm smart and hardworking enough, I can become a doctor one day. Long story short, from a very young age, every one told me that I was intelligent and should become a doctor. It would make my family and my family name proud and I knew it. So I tried, I studied and I got accepted at that special schools at 11( cause it has always been part of the path I was shown ). I not only got accepted, but also got the best marks at the test in the town. That day was the only day I remember my father looked very proud of me. I always did good at the exams, but there was always something lacking for them, like, although I become a top student, I didn't become the best, or although I became the best, some of my marks still could be better. So there was always some criticism waiting for me, no matter what result I gained. The only time that there wasn't any, was that one time that I got accepted in those special schools at 11. That day I only saw appreciation. After that, I always kept trying but I guess I was never hardworking enough. My parents used to say it was because I couldn't put my complete focus on studying. Because I used to draw, and play soccer, and also attend English classes. I loved all of those activities, but I dropped all of them when I entered highschool. Because everyone said they were distracting me from my purpose that was becoming a doctor. That I needed to study biology and math and not waste my time with arts and sports. So I did it. And I was ok with it, or at least I thought I was. Untill I wasn't anymore. Until suddenly this pandemic started one year and a half ago, and I no longer could go to school. And I started struggling to keep up with my lessons and studying. I understood that I didn't enjoy it, it had become like a chore. I didn't understand how much my friends, my teachers and my school meant to me and how much it affected my willingness to studying till I lost it. And it took me even longer to find out the reason I needed them so much. And I hate that reason. I totally hate it. But it was true. I needed school because they gave me the appreciation and approval I always yearned for. I found out that one of the reasons I studied well was that I liked everyone appreciating me. I like the looked of awe in their eyes when I solved math problems or when I answered a biology question no one knew of. And I no longer had those. I was all alone with my family, since school were closed. And I knew- I know- my family loves me, but their tactics for helping someone or something get better has always been criticizing the wrong things, instead of praising the good parts. And it helped, or it used to do, at least. But just as long as I got the praise and approval I needed from the others. But I didn't

get them anymore cause I was all alone with my family now. I just had them. And the criticism become harder and unbearable. Studying was like a burden, a chore. And it didn't help that with the whole staying home situation, I had more time to think and I realized how long it had been since last time I drew anything. Or played soccer. Or read my favorite novels. I realized I never once stopped to think about what I wanted to do. My life path had always been described for me. I'd always known what I was supposed to do, or what I was supposed to be. But I was no longer sure if it was what I wanted. And I was confused and lost and absolutely terrified. I didn't know what to do. Whether to continue my path, or change it. I tried to speak to my parents. But they didn't get it. They didn't get why I was suddenly hesitating and told me I was just ruining all those years of trying, for nothing. So I stopped talking about it. But I couldn't stop thinking about it. I couldn't help feeling like I've always lived for others. Like, why the hell should I need my teachers and classmates appreciating and praising me? Why should not having that anymore make studying boring for me?? Why did I never thought about my future as a choice, not something that was always set to happen?! I was angry at myself but most of all, I was lost, I didn't know what the hell to do. And no one could understand me, so when my parents asked me how I was preparing myself for the national exam of universities acceptance, I lied. I lied and told them I was doing ok, while I totally wasn't. I couldn't tell them, I didn't want them to blame me, cause I blamed myself enough. I hoped it will get better by the time. But it didn't. Everyone thinks I'm a fucking Christopher Lightwood, while honestly, I'm more a Alastair Carstairs.

And now, here am I, not knowing what the hell to do. The exam for universities acceptance is in less than a month and a half. I know I still have time, but I no longer know what I want to do. And I no longer believe in my abilities. I think my parents were right, I think I just wasted my time hesitating and questioning myself. Maybe becoming a doctor doesn't make me happy, but isn't it worth it?? That at least it is what my father wanted for me all along? That I can at least make my family happy and proud?? Cause I don't know what makes me happy. And now, it's too late to think about it and find out. Cause I'm scared to find out. I'm scared that I make my family disappointed, like I made myself disappointed. I'm afraid it's too late and no matter what I do, I'm gonna make them disappointed. That while everyone thinks I'm gonna get accepted at the best medicine school, I won't get accepted at all. I wasted so much time questioning everything. If only I continued my path, at least my family would be happy. But now, I'm terrified that I make them disappointed and remain unhappy myself. Cause even if I was living a lie, even if I one day got up and see I didn't like my life, at least I still had a life. A life in which nobody had expectations from me any longer. And even if I didn't like my life, I was at least alone to do whatever I want with it. But at the moment, I just want to become a doctor, and pay off what I've always felt I owe my family. My father. That was the only thing he ever wanted from me. ( And it pays handsomely, sure. It's just, I was never sure if I enjoy doing it, not just its payment.)

But I'm now terrified that I've ruined my chance for even having this. I think I should've never questioned my life. It didn't help that I found out I wasn't happy. I can't help but think I fucked everything up. I always tried to be open to changes. To be brave, just like Alec was. But how can I do that when I don't know what I want? How can I even choose another job when I was practically raised to become a doctor since forever? How can I change my path when I sacrificed lots of things that I loved for it?? All those soccer games I didn't attend, all those drawings I didn't draw, just to have time to study! How can I do it?? And what if my family was always right, that becoming a doctor is best for me? What if I've had fucked up my chance of becoming a doctor even??

And more than anything, I'm tired of keeping all that a secret. I feel guilty as hell whenever I see my parents cause I lied to them, and it's making it all hard to breathe. I'm really really tired. I'm lost. What am I supposed to do? What should I do???

Hello, darling.

Thank you for trusting me with this. I'm glad you wanted to talk to someone. Whatever you feel, it's out now. You no longer have to worry this is a secret. I hope that helps you a little. I hope it lightens the burden you carry on your shoulder.

As always, I cannot tell you what to do. It's your life - something I do remind yourself more often. It helps. I promise.

But I can tell you what I think.

1. I think you are very smart. Like VERY smart. So, if you are worried about changing your academic course or career path, I would say you have nothing to worry about. If you can study biology, trust me, you can find your way through any other subject. It's nothing to be afraid of. Every subject is hard. But you seem like a relentless little fighter to me. So, you will figure it out.

2. I think the reason your father wants you to be a doctor is because he still feels the pain of not achieving his dream. If he doesn't enjoy teaching, then he knows what it's like to live a life of regret. Your father wants to spare you from that. But irony is cruel. Because that very effort has pushed you into the same path. I think someone *cough* you *cough* needs to remind your father that even if you become a doctor, you will not be happy. And while your parents might not be able to see it clearly as you do, it's what they want too. Success doesn't necessarily mean happiness. So, maybe you should tell your father that. Tell him that even if you become a doctor, it wouldn't make you happy. So, despite all their prayers and efforts, your parents would still fail. Because you would be living a similar life as your father had to.

3. One and a half month sounds like a very short time. But here is the thing. I feel like if you put your mind to it, you can get through this exam. But what about your heart? Where does it want to be? What does it want to do? For me, it doesn't sound like a problem of "can I do this?". Yes, you can. It's more a question of, "do I want to do this?". I don't know the answer to that. You are smart. Figure it out.

4. The best advice I've gotten in life is this "do what makes you happy." I know that many don't have the luxury of following that advice in every possible way. But you have the chance. do it. If something or someone is bringing you unhappiness, you should have the liberty to say "no fuck off." It takes a lot of courage to look at something and say 'no'. We haven't been taught to say that enough. Learn to say 'no'. If you take away anything from this response, it should be that.

5. You don't owe anyone anything. Just so you know. Not your family. Your parents. Not your school. No one. Nothing. But you owe it to yourself to be happy.

6. I have met many people like your father - and perhaps yourself - who have told me that "I couldn't follow my dreams. But when I have a child one day, I will do everything in my power to make sure they get to achieve their dream". It's truly a beautiful sentiment. But all I can think is...If it's possible for us to fight for an unborn child of ours, then why can't be fight for ourselves. If we are willing to fight in the future, then why not now?

I know you want your parents to be happy. I know you don't want to let them down. I know a lot of us think that way. So I ask - Why can't we show the kindness we are willing to show the ones we love to ourselves?

7. I don't know what you are going to do either, my love. But I know you will survive. So, even if these words get washed away and even if the confidence you feel is momentary and even if you end up taking the exam and do biology, I hope you remember that it is never, ever, ever too late to choose yourself. To follow your dreams. To stand up and say no.

8. You told me you are more like Alastair. So, I'll leave you with this.

"If you choose that for yourself, it is your choice, but you cannot choose for me”

All my love,

Dani x.

#choose for yourself #prioritise yourself #it doesn't make you selfish #I promise #ps - you are always welcome to come talk to me or tell me your secrets #even if you don't have any cute malec fan arts for me #I will still love you the same #<3 #love

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ahysopae · 3 years

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The Gifted episode 1, or how to start introducing 15 characters without overwhelming the viewer

The Gifted first foundation are the characters: each of them is beautifully flawed. They're close enough of archetypes to give to the viewer references (it's very important to have elements to link them to another character or to yourself - 'I see myself in them' is the best and easiest way to get you to love a character), but also each one of them has their identity clearly defined. But we have 15 characters in total, and even if some of them are mostly in the background (looking at the twins right now), it was not possible to introduce all at once (luckily, because I would never remember all their names in this case). I suppose it's one of the reasons for the switch of main character between the episodes (and since I'm a sucker for this type of thing, I'm in awe).

The first episode focus on Pang (of course it's our protagonist, our Percy Jackson - maybe I should dive in this later), but also introduce us, at least in the surface, to Nac, Wave, Namtarn, Ohm and Pom and give us hints on almost all of the others. Pang is at first shown to us as a voice-over, solidifying him as the narrator, even if we realize soon that what he says is for his webcam. The bit before the opening presents him like someone charismatic and determined, a teenager speaking about something than most people know, because they live or lived it. For the sake of this analysis/words vomit I will forget the introduction of the episode, with all the teasers for what's soon to come. So the Pang we meet later see himself as dumb: we saw him as a quick-witted boy, good to play innocent, a bit impertinent, not good at test and a bit pouty when he fails - but kind, at heart. A good kid. Through him we discover the school system in all its unfairness, and even if it's shown kinda jokingly, already the horror of it start to be apparent.

Pang for this bit is our introduction to the universe of the show, because we discover the rules with him. It's a pretty common way to lead the viewer or reader in a new universe (in Star Wars, the movie starts with Luke leaving his farm and discovering something else in the galaxy, Harry Potter is literally introduced to the magical world, the hobbits in lotr leave the little Shire to travel in the rest of the Middle Earth, ...). The important part it's that we can link the two: Pang, like the Gifted program, is more that we think at first. He is mostly more dangerous, and we have some clues of that with his first use of his potential - already in the first episode, already on Nac.

Pang's existence is also the first break in the system: him being both gifted and in 8th class is a paradox, and almost everyone seems not sure what to do with him (except Pom, maybe) him the first. He believes that he hasn't his place in the gifted program, and is really insecure about that.

Nac seems at first a nice friend. He is okay too help Pang with his plans (helping him with the phone and lying for him about his class at meal) and to share his room with him. He is also favorable to the school system (clearly because he is in the good side of the fence), even if he haven't a issue to bend or break the rules for his own advantage. His mask breaks when his friend (his dumb friend, to be precise) has better than him.

Nac has two uses in the narrative: he is an opposite mirror of Wave (in words and in attitude - where Wave is prickly, Nac is charming, but both of them use the same insult, leech, on Pang about his relationship with the other) and he is a trigger to Pang's potential. In fact he is probably the one Pang controls the most in the season (I don't remember if he uses his potential two or three time on him, so don't quote me on that, I will probably realize my mistake later on).

Wave - well, Wave is Wave. The first thing we see of him is in the classroom while Pang runs with the phone he takes back (remember, I don't cover the introduction's part here, because the first thing we see of him is, in fact, a background for a second during an exam and him punching Pang). He looks extremely bored, almost sleeping on his table (in contrast with Nac, on the same line than him, who drinks the teacher's words), until Pang literally break the studious ambiance, proving again that he is here to disturb the established order. Already we know that Wave doesn't feel the need to hide when something bore him, even if he is in a social situation where he should. He comes out like not good socially, arrogant and not the type to try to please.

His first interaction with Pang is a disaster (like no Wave, it's not how you flirt make a friend), and could place him on the school's side (symbolized by the ominous Ladda) even if we realize soon enough that the only side Wave chooses is his own. It leads again to a confrontation Nac/Wave, where Wave is defined as a solitary kid, in contrast with the sociable Nac. Nac himself establishes Wave as a mathematical/computer genius who takes pride in his intelligence (and the flashback, by focusing at first on Punn, gives us an hint of him as almost as intelligent than Wave - he raises his hand almost as fast but more politely - until we realize Wave doesn't write his answer. It tells us that Punn is clever, well-mannered and hard-working, and also that his relationship with Wave will be competitive but they are linked in a way or an other).

Him reveling the meaning of potentials just after Pang understood it and seemed ready to give the answer (even if it was in fact to ask to leave), is a proof that they could form a good team -or be the worst of enemies.

For Namtarn, lets first address the elephant in the room: I don't believe one instant the "romantic" interaction between Pang and her (cut to my mum telling "if it's how men and women interact in Thailand, their birth rate must be really low"). It's worst again in contrast with Claire and Punn, who are almost glued to the hips, or the friendship between Korn and Claire or Mon, or between Namtarn and Ohm. They tried romance, I see clumsy awkward people, and I can't believe it's not voluntarily.

Aside from that, Namtarn appears like perceptive, guessing who is Pang and that he is in the gifted class, a bit curious and nice, even if socially she's not the best (and I mean, yeah, they're 15-years-olds, so it's normal, like it's normal if some of them are cocky to the extreme). It could give us some clue about the fact that she grows up pretty sheltered, but it's maybe a stretch for my part.

Ohm first phrase is for asking a pen (does someone counted how many pens Ohm loses? It will be a fun statistic). He comes as the smiley-go-lucky kind of guy, telling everything that crosses his mind, putting his feet on his mouth every time he speaks. Also for the enigma posed by Pom he clearly doesn't know the answer and only raise his hand to follow the group.

Side question but why no one give him tissues? Boy nosebleeds every two minutes.

The first we see of Pom is when Pang and Nac try to steal the exam's results. His face stay in the shadow while we discover he is in charge of the exam. I feel obligated to point that we see his face a bit more after he drops his pen, and we know how much this pen is important for the rest of the plot (I'm realizing right now that it's in fact, a Chekhov's gun) . For his first apparition before the class, he has an image of a nice teacher, asking his students to call him by his nickname. Already we can link the metronome to him, since its in the classroom (since it's shown while Ohm has a nosebleed trying to resolve the rubik's cube, we can say it's linked to the potential too, but it's maybe a stretch).

To ends that, I want to point that the first plan where we see all the gifted class, when Pang enters, gives us a lot of information about the characters and their relationships together (It also puts us in Pang's shoes). We have the group Mon-Korn-Claire-Punn: Korn smile to Mon and Claire, Claire speaks to Mon and Korn before turning her head to Punn, her body already directed to him, Punn is separated to them since he sits on his table, but his body is turned in Claire's direction too. Namtarn is ready to take note, her back straight, while Ohm is slumped on his table and looks around. When we have a plan on each of them watching Pang, Mon's face is open and curious, Korn kinda shy away, Claire is disdainful, Punn is attentive, the twins gauge him (and already they have matching band-aids and Wave rolls his eyes so hard he clearly make it voluntarily.

#the gifted #the gifted the series #the gifted rewatch #the gifted episode 1 #analysis

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azz-clazz-shit · 3 years

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Love is War by @/xXKrist_CrosserXx on Wattpad.

[It is based off the anime Love is War. Like the first half of the first episode. And I already asked the author if I could publish it on tumblr and they allowed it.

Italics are the narrator.]

You fall in love with someone...

In a cloudy and dark area, Sugino stood in front of Kanzaki. "Pl-Please be my girlfriend!" He said bowing down with his hand out for the girl to hold.

...confess that love...

She gasped in surprise with a blush on her face and slowly let her hand rest against the Sugino's palm.

... and become a couple.

Then all of a sudden, the sun came up, along with doves and a church. Along with many animals and people that joined in as well.

Everyone would say that's a happy thing.

They all let out cheers as confetti and ribbons were released to the sky.

But they're wrong!

A gift fell to the floor, breaking it apart.

Even among sweethearts, there exists a distinct power relationship!

She had a sweet smile on her face until all of a sudden, the smile turned to something more dark and sinister. Sugino had a shocked expression on his face as he tried to back away.

A side that exploits and a side that's exploited.

Kanzaki stepped on his head. She was holding chains as she let laughed at his misery.

A side that's devoted, a side receiving devotion. A winner and a loser!

If you're trying to live a noble life, then you mustn't become a loser.

Love is WAR!

Karma stared at Gakushuu with daggers behind his back where as Gakushuu also stared at karma with a gun behind his back.

The person who falls in love loses.

Kunugigaoka Academy!

It's a prestigious school with an ancient and honorable origin, founded as a faculty to educate upper-class children. The focus on nobility is gone, but many talented students born into wealthy, distinguished families and shouldering the future attend the school.

In the hallway, the students passing by greeted each other.

One girl widened her eyes as she spotted something or someone.

Naturally ordinary people wouldn't be permitted to lead and bring these students together!

A boy with strawberry blonde hair passed through the hallway along with a person with red hair.

"Everyone look." The same girl said. People turned to the direction she told them to look and as they did they were filled with admiration.

"The Student Council members!" She squealed out as Karma and Gakushuu were walking. Gakushuu was in the front, reading a book while Karma was just right behind him.

Karma Akabane, the vice-president of the Student Council at Kunugigaoka Academy. Total assets: 200 trillion yen. Yes, more than Koro-sensei. He family owns the Akabane group, one of the top four financial conglomerates in Japan, with over 1,000 subsidiaries.

Benefitting her superior lineage, e was a talented young man, who has attained splendid achievements in various fields. Such as, traditional performing arts, music and martial arts. That is Karma Akabane. And the one Karma supports is...

Gakushuu Asano, the president of the Student Council at Kunugigaoka Academy. He's wise and intelligent, strong and silent. He scores first place in the practice exams. In contrast to the talented Karma, his devotion to studying commands awe and fear. And because of that exemplary behavior, he was selected to be the Student Council President, despite being relatively new to the school.

The red armband that stays on his sleeve has been passed down from president to president at Kunugigaoka Academy for all the years it existed!

Both walked down the hallway, hearing the chatters of many other classmates who made a pathway for them to continue walking as they just stared at them.

"Those two always look so good together." A girl murmured.

"There's even a dignity to them!" Another girl chattered back.

"Do you think they're dating?" A friend of theirs asked.

"Somebody please ask them!"

"I wouldn't dare!"

"It would be presumptuous to even get close to the. Let alone ask such a question!"

The doors of the Student Council opened. Then, the thud of the door, signaling it's closed brought the chatters of the students to shut down.

Karma poured tea into a cup. "It seems that... there's a rumor going around... that we're in a relationship or some such." He placed the teacup he poured in front of Gakushuu.

"That's normal for their age. You should ignore it." He advised to the red head. 'The fools do enjoy talking about nonsensical love affairs. Although...' His eyes turned to Karma's direction. And with a turn Karma looked at the Asano while holding a tray close to his chest. 'if Akabane demanded that I go out with him, I suppose I would mull it over!' He boasted to himself. 'And I'm certain she has feelings for me. Probably just a matter of time.' He let out a chuckle. 'He should just take off his prideful mask of a perfect, pampered young man and make his blushing appeal to me.' He thought to himself as he imagined Karma all fidgeting with the tray and blushing while facing his face away saying "Pr-president, I need to talk to you." He let out another chuckle.

'The ignorant children with their common talk.' Karma thought with a smirk on his face. 'Who do they think I am. I'm a member of the Akabane family, the heart of this country. How did they reach the conclusion that I would be dating a commoner?' He took a peek of Gakushuu. 'Well, I suppose there could be a very slight possibility. If he gets on his knees and offered up his body, soul and hometown, I suppose I could train him to be a person who measures up to me.' He let out a light chuckle. 'Certainly, there's no one who doesn't pine for me. It's probably just a matter of time.'

Both were just creepily laughing to themselves in the empty room.

While they were engaging in this kind of thing...half a year has passed! Nothing of note happened during that period.

Both were in the Student Council room doing paper work sitting next to each other. And oddly enough, there was a steamed bun in the middle of the table.

"By the way, today there were snails in the interior of the apple and cherry relief in the courtyard's water fountain." Karma said, trying to start a small talk.

"My younger sister once caught a cold taking a dip in the water fountain, even though it was hot outside. When you act according to emotions, there are no good results." He responded blankly.

During this period of nothingness, their thoughts shifted from 'I wouldn't mind dating him.' to 'Maybe I'll make him confess his love to me.' Meanwhile, one other person had no idea that two super high school-level minds were in engaged in sophisticated strategizing.

A girl with green pigtails sat across from them. "Ah!" Kayano Kaede, the student council secretary of Kunugigaoka Academy. "That reminds me! Listen to this! I won a pair of movie tickets, but my parents won't let me see stuff like that." She said while grabbing something out of the pockets in the school uniform. "So, are you two interested?" The tickets she held up had the name 'Love Refrain' making it pretty obvious that it was a romance movie.

"Hmm," Gakushuu thought about it because Note: he is a cheapskate. "Come to think of it, I have a rare free weekend." He opened up a pocket planner and flipped to a page with nothing scheduled on it. "So, Akabane, why don't we-"

"Supposedly there's a jinx. If two people go see this movie together, they'll become a couple." Kayano interrupted him.

Gakushuu's face suddenly turned pale and was dripping in cold sweat from hearing that.

"How romantic!" She squealed, squirming in her seat.

"Oh, President." Karma placed the pen he was working with down. He turned to face Gakushuu. "Did you just invite me?"

A drop of Gakushuu's sweat dropped.

"You want to go with me to a movie in which pairs are said to be a couple if they see it together. Oh, dear, that sounds a lot like..."

'Like I'm asking him out on a date!' Gakushuu, screaming mentally with his eyes twitching, finishing the sentence with his thoughts.

The Asano's predicament was, in romance, 'The person who falls in love loses' is the rule! As they were both filled with pride, neither one could confess one iota of romantic interest!

'What should I do? It's blatant. The only I could do is smooth it over!' Gakushuu tried to think of a scenario.

"Why don't we sell the tickets to a scalper?" He suggested.

"Oh, President, I've never seen you so flustered before." Karma said from behind. Karma let out a little smile as Gakushuu's face turned blue. "How cute." Karma said ever so slowly, looking down on him with his dull mercury eyes.

'This is unacceptable! There is no escape route of the path that Asano conquers! You're the one who's going to run, Akabane!' He was determined.

"Yeah, I invited you, Akabane. I don't care about rumors like that, but it sees you do." He grabbed the tickets from Kayano's hand. "Do you want to see this movie with me?" He asked as he waved the ticket in his hand.

That moment, Karma thought...

'After indicating the intent to invite me, he assigned me the choice of whether we see the movie or not. Well played. I could choose to refuse, but then all of y preliminary arrangements up to now would become meaningless. I went to all the trouble of fabricating a prize and putting it in Kaede's mailbox. My plan to aim for one of the president's rare free days would be for nothing! And if I turn him down now, the president may never invite me to anything again! From the viewpoint of a guy, I say no! And I say no to that kind of choice!' He mentally pouted at the last few sentences.

"Yes, well..." Karma finally spoke out. "I can't help believing in stories like that." Karma had a fucking adorable face that I can't describe so just imagine Karma having the puppy eyes and blushing and everything around him is sparkling. "So if we are going, I'd like you to at least invite me with more passion."

'Innocent' skill implemented!

Because of that skill, Gakushuu was shocked as if he just stepped on a puppy or kitten. As if he had done something that would bring him to all the gates in hell, maybe even more.

It's a negotiating skill passed on from father to child in the Akabane family. It's said this calculated expression and voice even make the gods' hearts beat faster. In truth, Gakushuu's thoughts were also in disarray.

'Well, I guess it is an Asano's duty to ask a person out.'

That thought crossed his mind! Of course, Karma didn't let that chance go by! He pursued without a moment's delay.

Karma's eyes hatched onto him like a prey and acted hastily by grabbing his hands, which caused the tickets to fall to the ground.

"I'm at the age where I'd like to try a little romance too." He looked away as if he was shy and Kara's atmosphere was filled with lovely hearts.

Gakushuu flinched as a growing blush would soon fill his pale face as his eyes turned wide and wavering. Whereas Kayano just sat there, watching all this happening. But the an idea came into her head as she grabbed something out of her pocket.

This battle of thoughts seemed to be like a chess problem. Kara cornered Gakushuu, who searched for an opportunity to turn it around. The brains of these prodigies raced two steps ahead, clashing with each other as wheels turned faster than any ordinary mind! Karma strengthened his defense! Gakushuu tried to break through! They both constructed a theory leading to a conclusion! The one who completed the theory first would be the winner!

"Ah!" Kayano voiced out. "If you don't like love stories, you can also use these tickets..." Karma and Gakushuu looked at her as if she somewhat interrupted something. She held out two tickets with both of her hands. "...to go see the movie, 'The Birdie from Tottori.'"

"'The Birdie..."

"...from Tottori?'"

Both said, looking at Kayano with a confused yet shocked expression on their face.

Chaos Theory. Secretary Kaede's casual remark added an element of chaos into the theories that were all but completed! It was only one element, but like the Big Bang, the chaos increased the possibilities. In order to process the vastly expanded choices, the wheels in their brains spun even faster, going beyond their limits!

Gakushuu's and Karma's head erupted steam from all the thinking they had to do. They sat blankly as if someone just asked them 'Is the sun a planet?'

"Un, is something wrong?" Kayano asked in concern of the two people.

As a result, their brains craved a great deal of sugar! The only sugar in the Student council office was in a single steamed bun! Thus, whoever obtained the steamed bun would be the winner!

Both rivals dramatically reached for the steamed bun. As soon as it was in the grasps of their hands, Kayano turned to the clock and said "Afternoon classes are about to start." She had the steamed bun in her hand and had a 'nom' of it as Karma and Gakushuu were frozen in place. "Well, see you again after school." she muffled out with the steamed bun still in her mouth as she walked away all innocently. She jumped in the air, letting go of the steamed bun and ate it whole, with a lick of her lips.

Both rival's souls seemed to had left their bodies. They both suddenly collapsed on the table as soon as Kayano left.

It was a sophisticated battle of the brains, with the ingenuity and pride of these two geniuses on the line. Todays Battle result: Both sides defeated.

#assassination classroom #anime #ansatsu kyoushitsu #assclass #karma akabane #karma assassination classroom #asano gakushuu #karushuu #karma x gakushuu #gakushuu x karma

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hops-hunny · 4 years

Text

Felix Felicis

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Hufflepuff! Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Request: “Can you do Draco x Hufflepuff reader fluff where they’re cuddling together and all he wants to do is make her laugh because she failed an exam earlier that day so he’s trying to do everything he can to cheer her up and overall it’s just super fluffy? Thank you have a great day❤️❤️”

Summary: After (Y/N) has a rather unfortunate week, Draco does everything in his power to change that. In a way, he was (Y/n)’s own little Felix Felicis.

A/N: This was my first request so I was a bit nervous writing it! I enjoyed every bit though, this was a very cute request. I hope it was everything you wanted and more anon <3

If (Y/n) didn't know any better, she would've claimed that the world had it out for her. And after the week she had, who would have blamed her? On Monday in potions, she had stirred the wrong way causing a reaction that made her eyebrows disappear(thank god for makeup). On Tuesday, she had slipped and fallen in the great hall which caused a chorus of laughter from every house, including her fellow Hufflepuffs. Wednesday, well, nothing happened. She felt relieved. She had answered a question correctly in DADA, had a free period that overlapped with her friends, and had taken an exam in potions which in her opinion was very easy! Her stroke of bad luck was no more! She was ecstatic...until Thursday came around. If she had thought the rest of the week was bad, then Thursday was absolutely fucking dreadful. Her day started off fine, she woke up, got dressed, and put on her favorite perfume. She didn’t use it often, only when she expected the day to be amazing

That hopeful feeling of luck was short lived and ended by the time she got to the great hall. The Weasley twins had rigged a prank on the wrong person which resulted in her face being stained blue, when she got to her first class her seat was taken by someone else which she didn’t have a problem with. That was until she noticed the only seat left was near Fletcher Digby, who was known for his noticeable...odor that was...to put it nicely, absolutely putrid. By the end of her day, she had gathered up a broken shoe, a run in her stockings, a rip in her blouse, and the blue tint to her face had somehow gotten worse - which she later found out was sweat activated. (Y/n) was usually very optimistic. Even during the cloudiest of days or saddest of times she was always there to offer encouraging words and a smile. If a fellow Hufflepuff was sick, she’d often bake them something with the house elves or give them the last of her sweets from Honeydukes. She even did this for people in other houses as well, a ‘Get Well Soon!’ card attached along with it. That’s what her boyfriend, Draco, loved about her.

She was his light in all the darkness, the candle to his flame. When she came into his life, she taught him many things. His love for her was deep and pure and anyone would be a fool not to notice. That’s why Draco was concerned when he started to see her throughout the week less and less. During the school day, they didn’t have any classes together but even then he’d always wave or smile to her during hallpassing. He’d leave a kiss on her forehead in the great hall before heading to his own table and waited for her after her last class of the day on Friday. So when Draco found himself waiting a lot longer than usual outside of the potion’s room he grew concerned. He pushed past a few students entering the room. His smile dropped when there was no one left in the room but Fletcher Digby. Come to think of it, had he seen her at all today? He assumed she came to the great hall late but now that he thought about it, he hadn’t seen her leave with her friends. There were no quick pecks during hallpassing, winks when they saw each other. He quickly strode the halls, looking for her. He was worried, it wasn’t like (y/n) to just miss a day of class with no warning or explanation prior.

“Hannah, have you seen (Y/n)? I haven’t seen her all day and I'm growing quite worried.” He said pulling the Hufflepuff off to the side. If anyone were to know where she was, surely her roommate would. The girl took a moment to think.

“Hm, no. I haven’t seen her since this morning. Before I left the dorm, she was still sleeping. She was really distraught last night so I’m not surprised she decided to stay in. However, I do admit that is completely unlike her.” She offered him a sympathetic smile as he thanked her before heading in the direction of the girls dormitory.

He knocked on the door, finding it to not be locked as it popped open. He walked in only to find that her bed was empty. The only person to be found was Luna, who was holding (Y/n)’s favorite stuffed giraffe (one he had given to her as a present once). She hadn’t noticed him yet but wasn’t phased when he let out a sharp, “What are you doing with that?” she simply turned around and offered him a soft grin.

“Hello Draco, (Y/n) asked me to bring this to her. She was having a terribly bad case of wrackspurts today. One of the worst cases I’ve seen really. So she went where she usually does when she has a bad day although, I think you should bring it to her now that you’re here. Also give her this, it’s a good luck charm I made for her. It should get rid of the wrackspurts and bring luck along with it.” She spoke, handing him the stuffed giraffe and a necklace with a peculiar charm made of tiger’s eye. He looked at it for a sec before taking it, offering her a nod before heading off where he knew you’d be.

------------------

You sat cross legged on the old, comfy couch, drinking the cup of chamomile and lavender tea Hagrid had brought to you. You had grown quite close to the gentle giant throughout your years at Hogwarts. During your first year, you were having an awful day, not as bad as the week you were currently going through but still quite a bad one. You were homesick and missed your family dearly. Your housemates tried to cheer you up with treats and kind words and although you appreciated them dearly, nothing could stop the tears from flowing. That’s when Luna came in, she brought you straight to Hagrid’s hut and explained your dilemma. He welcomed you both in, brewing you tea and offering whatever treats he had. Soon enough, your tears stopped. Hagrid’s hut slowly started to become your home away from home as he offered it to you whenever you liked without asking any questions if you weren’t willing to talk.

Usually, you’d slowly start to tell him what was wrong but today was one of those silent days. Many would expect Hagrid to be absolutely horrid with emotions but, he had like a 6th sense when it came to them. He decided to leave you alone for a few hours, tending to his duties. When he came back, he had gotten you your favorite dessert from the house elves. They were always more than willing to send and make you things because of how kind and helpful you were to them. You sipped at your tea as you softly pet Fang’s head which was resting in your lap. You and Fang’s heads both perked up as you heard a knock at the door. Hagrid walked to the door to see who it was.

“Ah, I figured I would see ya sometime soon.” he said, stepping to the side to let whoever it was in. Draco stepped into the small hut, closing the door as he came to sit near you on the couch. You instantly threw yourself into his arms which in turn, caused him to wrap his arms around you tightly, placing a kiss on the top of your head as he stroked your back. Hagrid took that as his sign to leave, taking the large dog with him. Draco let you cry a bit, his heart breaking at the noises.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere, love. Are you alright? Luna told me to give you these.” He said as he handed the girl her giraffe. She hugged it tightly as he put the charm around her neck. She sat between her lover’s legs sighing. He held her close as she described her day, his heart aching from all that she had to deal with and his mind cursing him for not realizing sooner.

----------------

“And on top of all of that, I failed my potions exam! That wouldn’t have been bad if I hadn’t gone on blabbing to all my friends how well I thought I did on the bloody thing. I just feel like the world has it out for me.” She said looking up at him. He nodded in understanding. He had stayed quiet as she had vent to him, just providing the listening ear she needed. That’s when he got a few ideas. He smiled before standing up, stretching his hand out for the girl to grab.

“Come with me. I’ve got an idea! Quickly, we mustn’t be caught.” He said eagerly as he stared at her. She hesitantly grabbed his hand, setting Georgie, her giraffe, on the couch before she was swiftly dragged out of the hut. Draco pulled his girlfriend along, running as she tried to keep up due to the fact her legs were much shorter.

“Where are we going, Dray?” She asked which prompted a quick “shhh!!” from Draco. They both ran across the grounds of the school, hand in hand as to not be caught. (Y/n) had no idea where he was taking her but she thought anything would be better than moping around the rest of the day. They both tried to contain the wild giggles coming from their mouths as they headed in the direction of Hogsmeade.

-------------------------------

As they finally made it, they both still had smiles on their faces at the rush they had gotten from sneaking off. Draco had tied his tie around the girl’s eyes leading her in the way of whatever wild idea it was that he had. “What if we get caught? Someone is bound to see us.” she said, her face forming a frown at the thought of being caught.

“Oh hush darling, we’ll be fine. Besides if we do happen to get caught in some trouble, I’m sure my father won’t mind bailing us out.” He said, finally removing her blindfold. She opened her eyes to see...Madam Puddifoots? She gave him a strange look. “We’re here to get a laugh out of the things that happen in here, sweets. Trust me, you’ll see. Act natural.” He took her hand, leading her to a small booth.

Soon enough, she saw and heard what he meant. The sight of all the couples with their peculiar behaviors was quite a laugh. They saw one couple come in with matching crochet sweaters with each others faces on it, another referred to each other as each others “snuggle-boop-kitty-fuzy-wuzzykins”and only that each time they spoke to each other. But along with the odd, mushy, and gushy couples came a few odd breakups too. One man tried to propose by reciting an “original poem” which turned out to be stolen, causing his boyfriend to dump scalding hot tea on his head. Another guy forgot he scheduled dates with 4 different girls at the same spot, on the same day..didn’t end well for him. A few employees had to carry him out on a stretcher as the girls all exchanged numbers.

By the time they were back on their way to the castle, (Y/n) was already in a better mood. She held an ice cream cone in one hand, and Draco’s hand in her other. They both paused coming to the same realization. Although it was easy to sneak out, how would they sneak back in? The couple locked eyes at the same time before Draco picked her up, tossing her over his shoulder. (Y/n) made sure her ice cream didn’t fall as her boyfriend sprinted in the shadows, using a passageway she had never seen before to get back into the castle. Once inside, they both held in their giggles, quieting their breathing from the run back to the castle as they made their way to his dorm. By then she had long finished her ice cream as he tossed her on his bed, throwing himself down next to her shortly after. (Y/n) rolled over towards Draco to find him already facing her. The pair sat in silence for a moment before both losing composure. They began to laugh hysterically, to the point where a tear or two was shed. After their little laughing fit, Draco sat up, pulling his girlfriend on top of him. She turned, straddling him as she placed a soft kiss on his lips before resting her head on his shoulder.

“I just wanted to say thank you Draco. Not even just for today but for being there whenever I need you. This was honestly one of the worst weeks of my life but if I’m honest, I’d go through it all again to have another evening like the one we just had.” She said as she nuzzled in deeper, taking in the scent of expensive cologne and cinnamon. Her lover was taken back by her words. She was the only one who made him feel like that. Her words meant more to him than anything in the world. He tightened his grip on her, holding her close to him.

“I’d do it all again and more just to see you happy. Why don’t we make this a regular thing of ours, hm? Every friday, we’ll sneak outside the castle and do whatever we want, indulging to our hearts can’t handle it anymore? Even if not, everyday with you is an adventure, sneaky trips or not.” He said. Draco meant what he said full heartedly, everyday she managed to make his life an adventure, learning new things about himself that he didn’t know were there. It was like he was a canvas and she was the painter, each day, each moment, a different stroke of color on his heart.

Perhaps it was Luna’s good luck charm or perhaps it was them, but from then on out each day seemed luckier than the last when he had his girl on his arm.

#draco malfoy #draco malfoy x you #draco malfoy x reader #draco x you #draco #luna lovegood #luna lovegood x you #luna lovegood x reader #harry potter imagines #harry potter #harry potter x reader

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commanderserwin · 4 years

Note

Hello! Umm 😶 may I ask for an erwin x reader its an enemies to friends to lovers trope where they headbutts and are against each other during their early cadets years then erwin got promoted to commander and are secretly smug about it but reader knows and shes like yeah right your eyebrows are still hideous but she loves his eyebrows then she learned about erwins dream, about his father... just do you hehehe I just want a strong reader that go against erwin but they end up together 😘

❯ characters. erwin smith x reader

❯ notes. hello! i’m so so sorry this took a lot! i got caught up with exams then my werdsmith undid half of what this was supposed to be (it was supposed to be an angst/hurt/comfort but i think i’m gona draft that fellas 😔 kinda finished tho sigh) but yes! so sorry, i hope you’re still there and this is okay for you! i hope you enjoy, my love ♡

hooked.

The enemy. A simple bond of dislike towards each other that has always left the two of you spewing words left and right, demanding from others who is right and wrong, who is better and the best, who is smarter, faster, stronger— all in the midst of training, and in lectures or classrooms, always looking for confirmation that they are the best. People thought that it was just the two of you being kids— the complete opposites of each other, always striving for the best for the attention of the superior officers, and from the instructors.

Even so, that they would always pair the two of you, put the two of you in the same squad, always pushing and pushing to be together to work things out but things would always get tangled and be turned into a mess but would turn out okay.

“That’s not how you do it,” Erwin commented, tapping your solution with his finger. He began to raise his hand to call on to the instructor but you placed it back down.

“I know, but it works,” you gritted through your teeth, busy with rereading the letters on the paper, as you pushed it to him. “Check it.”

“I don’t want to get a low remark on this.” Erwin grudgingly accepted the paper, hesitating to write his own name together with yours. But he wrote it nonetheless because it works out.

If that was how things were in lectures, it was the complete opposite during the trainings. Erwin would always jump faster than you, taking your point away from you while you lurched on a branch, angrily flailing your arms at him.

“That was my point!”

“Be quick,” Erwin screamed back, smiling while you flipped him off. He would annoyingly go to you, dusting off of his trousers while you marched forward at him, pushing him away.

“Thief!”

Then, while he watches by the corner of his eyes as you leapt to go back to the group, Erwin would shake his head, checking his gear and ultimately following you.

The friend. A simple bond of understanding that the two of you had already grown apart yet together, placing differences away to compromise, to work together and not against, as both of you started to question the use of hating each other when others are disappearing left and right— living with no promise that they’ll see tomorrow’s sun. The wisdom of growing a little older, the hardships of the work, the understanding.

It all started from that one sleepless evening, until you have memorized the lines and breaks on the ceiling, until you have closed your eyes hoping for the sleep to come but it never did. Little did you know, Erwin was also feeling the same thing. So when your paths crossed in the mess hall, both of you looking for something else to get off of bed, you two found each other.

Erwin sat on the table, a dimming candle beside him while his hands were clasped as he was deep in thought. He turned his head around just as you were about to leave, your eyes met his— and there was sadness swirling with the blues you have come to like.

“Can’t sleep?” Erwin asked quietly, looking at you.

It took you a minute to respond, all wanting to leave or to stay, to be with company or to go back memorizing the ceiling as the sun rises. You nodded, gripping the chamberstick as you rounded the table to sit in front of him.

“There is still hot water left, if you need it,” Erwin said, holding the mug before him. “Should I go make you some tea?”

You shook your head, clasping your hands together tightly, thinking if you should be here. Erwin stayed quiet, sipping his tea every now and then, looking out the windows behind your head, and then going back down to look at his mug.

“Are you okay?” You murmured, meeting his eyes as he looked at you. “Is something bothering you?”

“Just thinking,” Erwin nodded, eyes still deep in thought. He looked at his cup, smiling softly. “Just thinking about my father.”

“Oh,” you tapped your fingers on the table, racking your brain about Erwin. All you could remember was how he would animatedly talk of his father, saying his stories— until you perked up, making Erwin look at you. “I remembered he’s a teacher. How is he doing? Does he still teach?”

Erwin dropped his eyes, noticing the grasp he has on the cup. He raised his head, staring at you, and you knew just from one look that his father was gone. It was too familiar because you have gotten used to looking that way towards the families of your dead comrades.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, “I didn’t know... I’m sorry, Erwin.”

“It was a long time ago.” Erwin nodded, finishing his tea while he glanced at you.

Stories. You smiled softly, tilting your head to the side as you propped your elbow on the table. Erwin smiled back, perking up while you spoke to him.

“Will you tell me one of his stories?”

The lover. A simple yet deeper bond of each other, one that has seen the best and the worst, the hate and love, a bond that has called each other theirs— not the way enemies declared each other as nuisance, not the way friends declared each other as delight, but the way amour runs through the heart and brain.

It was a surprise. All the looks and the late night conversations just like before were normal. It was usual to hold each other's arms when walking in the headquarters, a tug on the sleeve, a hand on the back— everything that has become normal throughout the years.

But it was the fleeting glances. It was the smiles that became so much more, the eyes that speaks beyond the languages of being friends, the lips that has touched once— once because of the courage running through your veins as you placed your hands on either side of his neck, pulling him down to place a kiss as gentle as a feather, but the feeling inside was as heavy as all the weight in the world.

Then he pulled away, his eyes reading your face, and in a second, he leaned down— lips upon lips, twice, thrice, four times, as much as time permitted until somebody has knocked on his office door, calling out for him.

"In a minute," Erwin croaked, his thumb running over your lower lip as you stayed pressed against him, arms wrapped around his neck while his eyes stayed glued to yours. "I'll be out in a minute."

"Go on."

Erwin leaned down again, lips touching yours, smiling, as he pecked your lips over and over again until you laughed in his kisses, pushing him away. Erwin wrapped his hands around your body, until he used his hand to hold your chin steady, placing more kisses until you pulled away, a stern look on your face.

"Not on me," you mumbled against his lips, leaning forward but catching yourself as you patted his chest, "You'll be late."

"I can afford to be late," Erwin said, his thumb rubbing circles on your jaw, "They can wait."

"Just because you became Commander you could do whatever you want," you pursed your lips, clasping your hands behind his neck. Erwin raised his brow, a knowing look on his face, "Don't be too smug about it, Eyebrows."

"I haven't heard that in a while."

"Time to bring it back then," you nodded, brushing his brows as you pushed him away gently, turning him around to push him towards the door, "Okay, go on! Now!"

"Trying to order your Commander around?"

"Go, Eyebrows, or I will kick you out," you pulled him towards you, wrapping an arm around his back, dragging him outside but he was persistent.

Erwin looked down, smiling at how flustered you were, tinge of blush on the apples of your cheeks as you tried to look angry but the soft look on your eyes were telling a different story.

"I could stay."

“No.”

“I could, really,” Erwin placed his weight down, a hand coming up to the door as he looked at you. “I don’t mind.”

“Erwin...” you warned, taking his hand off of the door. “Get out.”

“Why?”

Erwin raised his brows, tapping his fingers on the door while you exhumed feign anger, caught in between wanting him to stay or to leave, and wanting to go towards him or the opposite way because... you just couldn’t handle being too close to him ot else you’ll lose your calm composure.

“Fine,” Erwin mumbled, slowly dropping his hand but you caught it in quick.

“No!” You hurriedly say, raising your hand at him, heart beating so fast that it made you feel so warm, “I mean, yes. Go.”

Erwin nodded, a smug smile forming on his lips as he shook his head in awe for what a flustered mess you were before him. He only realized that when he was about to step out, he felt a slight tug from behind only for you to notice that you were holding on to his shirt, tightly— until you have let go, scurrying past from him as you left him the door dumbstruck, unsure of what he should do next, but knowing fully that he wants to follow you.

Take his steps again as it lead him to you. He would gladly take all your screaming and scheming back when two were cadets— the deemed enemies of the Corps. He was thankful that because when he couldn’t sleep from thinking of his father, he has met you— his father acting like a string to pull the two of you together. He was grateful for the courage you had in you that resulted to the kiss— kisses that he found looking for more. He followed your hurried footsteps like a lost puppy while you repeatedly looked back with a frown on your face, as the distance between the two of you came into nothing as your shoulders brushed upon each others.

Looking straight ahead, you hooked your finger on his little finger— pinching his side as Erwin tried to lean down but you gave a him look, which caused him to straighten up, taking your hand whole in his own.

"Later, then."

#erwin 🤝 a lost puppy #erwin smith imagines #attack on titan imagine #attack on titan imagines #aot imagine #aot imagines #snk imagine #snk imagines #aot fanfiction #erwin smith x reader #erwin x reader

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hopelikethemoon · 4 years

Text

The Exam (Javier x Reader) {MTMF}

Title: The Exam Rating: PG-13 Length: 1800 Warnings: Medical procedures (female physical examine, mentions of procuedures related to reproductive health) and discusions of miscarriages, infertility, and other topics related to conception and pregnancy. Notes: You can find everything about Maybe Today, Maybe Forever here. Set in July 1996. I learned something new about Reader today. So that was cool. Summary: Reader goes to the OB/GYN for an exam.

@grapemama @seawhisperer @huliabitch @beccaplaying @thewallpapergoesorido @twomoonstwosuns @gooddaykate @livasaurasrex @ham4arrow @plexflexico @readsalot73 @hdlynn @lokiaddicted @randomness501 @fioccodineveautunnale @roxypeanut @snivellusim @lukesrighthand @historynerd04 @mrsparknuts @awesomefandomsunited @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @exrebelshocktrooper @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @ah-callie @swhiskeys @exrebelshocktrooper @u-wakatoshii @space-floozy @cable-kenobi @cool-ultra-nerd @himbopoes @findhimfives @pedrosdoll @frietiemeloen @arrowswithwifi @cinewhore @random066 @uncomicalhumour @heather-lynn @domino-oh-damn @cyarikaaa @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @im-still-a-pieceofgarbage @ksgeekgirl @yabby-girl @xqueenofthecraziesx @punkass-potato @coredrive @pascalesque @theduchessofkirkcaldy @queenquazar @sabinemorans @buckstaposition @holkaskrosnou @yespolkadotkitty@seeking-a-great–perhaps @kochamcie @jaime1110 @katlikeme

You chewed at a hangnail on your thumb as you perched on the edge of the exam table, looking between Javier and the door. “You know, I ran out of a doctor’s office in a hospital gown once.”

Javier’s brows rose upwards as he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms across his chest, “That sounds like a story I haven’t been told before.”

“Oh, the stories I could tell.” You laughed, though it didn’t quite reach your expression. “My mother was being… her usual self. I got fed up with her bullshit and decided to peace out. In the hospital gown.”

He snorted, “Somehow I can see you doing that.” Javier clicked his tongue against his teeth as his eyes wandered around the room.

The walls were covered with anatomical posters of uteruses and Fallopian tubes; gleefully pregnant women and their partners. You watched the way Javier’s face sobered — and you wondered if he was thinking what you were thinking.

A quick knock gave you a moment’s notice before the doctor and a nurse stepped into the room.

“I do apologize for the delay,” the doctor remarked as she introduced herself to the both of you. “We had a mother going into labor during her exam. Never a dull moment.”

“Lucky her.” You offered wryly, brushing your hands over your lap, straightening out the hospital gown.

“Indeed.” The doctor chuckled as she washed her hands, before slipping on a pair of gloves. “Mr. Peña, you’re welcome to wait in the waiting room while we exa—“

“I’d prefer it if he stayed.” You interjected with a shake of your head.

Javier scratched at his jaw, “I don’t want to be in the way.”

“We’re in this together.” You reminded him, before looking towards the doctor. “There’s nothing we’ll discuss that I won’t tell him later.”

“It’s nice to see a supportive partner,” The doctor remarked with a smile. “If you don’t mind laying back, I’m going to begin the exam while I ask you a few questions.”

Your teeth bit into your bottom lip as you laid back on the table, the paper crinkling beneath you as the doctor loomed over you.

“How long have you been trying?”

“Two months.” You answered as the doctor examined your breasts, before moving towards your stomach. “But we’ve never really used protection outside of birth control.”

“And you’ve been pregnant before?”

“We have a daughter.”

“Any history of miscarriages?”

You nodded slightly, “When I was fifteen. I didn’t even know until I went to the hospital.” You tilted your head, your eyes meeting Javier’s. There was nothing but compassion in his gaze.

The doctor’s fingers pressed into the soft flesh of your stomach as the examination continued. “Any history of sexually transmitted diseases?”

“We’ve both been tested over the years. We’re clean.” You winced a little as she pressed down hard on a spot.

“Is that tender?”

“Yeah,” You shifted under her touch. “But I’ve got a bruise there.”

The doctor’s brows rose upwards skeptically.

“We’ve taken the trying very seriously.” You admitted with an awkward laugh, “Javi, do you have that chart?”

“Yep.” He popped the ‘p’ as he passed the piece of paper to the nurse, who handed it to the doctor.

She bummed curiously as she reviewed the past two months. You’d charted out the last day of your birth control, your period, temperature changes, and indicated the days and times of intercourse. If you were thorough in your professional work, you’d gone thoroughly overboard in your pregnancy planning.

“Now that we’ve completed the external examination, I’m going to do an internal and external ultrasound. Just to ensure that everything looks normal and healthy.” She looked towards Javier then. “I usually recommend that the male partner be tested as well. It’s a simple procedure to check semen count.”

Javier shifted uncomfortably, “I read the leaflet.”

The nurse stepped out of the room and returned a moment later with a cart that held the ultrasound machine.

“Did you have any complications during your first pregnancy?” The doctor questioned you.

“Our daughter wasn’t planned.” You admitted. “Birth control, but no other protection. Easy pregnancy, aside from morning sickness.”

“Beginner’s luck,” The doctor said lightly as she adjusted the stirrups at the base of the exam table, helping your feet into them. “We’ll start with the internal ultrasound. It will feel a bit uncomfortable at first, but hopefully it will help us figure out what’s going on.”

You gave her a thumbs up, turning your head to look at Javier. “Be glad you don’t have to do this part.” You remarked.

“Trust me,” Javier pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek, nodding towards one of the posters detailing an external cephalic version. “I’m already in awe of what women go through.”

There was nothing wrong with you. Everything looked healthy and functional. By all accounts — you should’ve been pregnant. But you weren’t.

The doctor ran a panel of blood tests that would take a few days to get the results of, but she doubted that they’d reveal anything. Javier scheduled an appointment to get his swimmers counted.

“You sure you don’t want me to drive?” Javier questioned as he settled into the passenger seat.

“It’s a nice distraction,” You retorted, reaching across the center console to steal his sunglasses off his shirt. “What’s the process?”

Javier huffed, picking you the sheet of instructions he’d been given, “Three to five days without activity.”

“Glad it’s next week then.” You rubbed your thumbs over the steering wheel, staring straight ahead for a moment before starting up the car. “I’m supposed to start ovulating at some point in the next forty-eight hours, if things are running smoothly.”

“It seems like I’m the problem here,” Javier pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek, brows furrowed as he stared at the sheet. “I figured this was coming. You know, Steve had to go through a whole gauntlet of tests when they were struggling.”

You nodded, “I remember. They both went through the ringer.”

“It says I can bring a guest.” Javier remarked as he turned the piece of paper over and continued reading.

“I’m sure Steve will be honored by the offer.”

“Really?”

“I feel like there’s a testy joke in there somewhere.”

Javier snorted, “You’re lucky I love your bad humor.”

“I’m lucky for a lot of reasons.” You told him with a smirk. “I’d be happy to help.” You reached over and patted his leg. “I’m sure there’s nothing wrong with you either. It’s just a matter of timing.”

“Maybe.” He sighed, folding he paper in half, and then in half again before tucking it into the front inner pocket of his jacket. “How are you feeling?”

You made a face as you stopped at a red light, “A bit violated, but that’s pretty normal once the stirrups come out. You should see what happens during a pap smear.”

Javier glared at you, “I read the informational poster. I’d rather not.”

“It’s fun.” You said dryly as you started through the intersection, making the turn onto the highway. “Thank you for coming today. For staying.”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” Javier told you. “Even if it was one of the most uncomfortable experiences of my life.”

You grimaced, “I should’ve told you before—“

“No.” He shook his head. “It’s none of my business.”

“True.” You scraped your teeth over your bottom lip. “There was never a time to casually bring it up.” You pointed out, “Hey when I was fifteen I had a miscarriage and I didn’t even know what was happening.”

“When you were fifteen,” Javier rocked his jaw, “I would’ve been already in and out of college, and settled into the job at sheriff’s office.”

You nodded, “Sounds about right. Twenty-three?”

“Probably twenty-four.” Javier rubbed his hands together as he stared out the passenger window. “For what it’s worth… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” You told him honestly. “That was the first time I’ve thought about it since..” You thought for a second. “Maybe since I was a teenager. It never came up with Josie.”

“I wish this were as easy as it was with Josie.” Javier sighed. “It’s gotta be me. I’m not exactly young.”

“You’re not exactly old either.” You rolled your eyes. “Didn’t Hugh Hefner just have a kid at sixty-five?”

“True.”

“Okay, then it’s probably not you.” You flipped onto the turn signal and merged into the lane for the off ramp that led to your condo. “You’re only forty-five Javier.”

“I know.” He sighed heavily, sinking back against the seat. Out of the corner of your eye you could see the way he was clenching his jaw.

“Hey,” You reached over and squeezed his leg. “I think the doctor was pretty impressed by our chart.”

Javier snorted, resting his hand over yours. “We’re gonna have to break our streak when I’ve got to go without you, baby.”

“But that’s not for a couple days.” You reminded him, squeezing his leg three times. “You should’ve seen her face when she touched the bruise.”

“I’m sure she had a few thoughts on it.”

You laughed, “I’m sure.” In reality — you both knew that that was what happened when you got fucked into the side of your kitchen table. “You know what I don’t get?”

“Hmm?”

“When the doctor tells you that they’ll give you some privacy to get changed…” You said as you turned into your condo parking lot. “As if they haven’t just had a full look at your most intimate parts. Inside and out.”

“It didn’t look fun.” Javier’s brows rose upwards as he tilted his head to look at you. “You wanna rest? I can handle Josie this evening, when Steve drops her off.”

“I’ve been through worse.” You shrugged, pulling the keys out of the ignition. “It’s mostly just awkward. I mean, you saw the process. Mostly my stomach’s just a little sore because she prodded at me like it was a deep-tissue massage.”

“We’ve got a couple hours before he drops her off.” Javier tilted his head to look at you.

“I know.” You smirked at him. “And we’re home just in time for General Hospital.” It was no telenovela — but damn if you weren’t hooked.

“You know we don’t have to do this, right?”

“But I want to.” You met his gaze. “It’s probably just a matter of timing.” You wanted this to work — for him. You saw the way his eyes lingered on new mothers with their babies sitting in the waiting room. The way he made conversation with the anxious dads waiting for their partners to come out.

He’d missed all of that with Josie and you wanted to give him that one thing, after he’d given you everything.

#javier pena #javier pena x reader #pedro pascal x reader

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misha-moose-dean-burger-lover · 5 years

Text

Wait For It

Dean stalks out of the Impala agitatedly.

It's a sunny afternoon, and Sam's on the porch, coffee on the table next to him, flipping through his political science handbook. He looks up when he hears the car door being slammed, and his eyes follow Dean as he lands in the other chair around the table.

Then, without warning or premonition, Dean starts to talk.

He's got a new colleague.

Novak, he calls him. With gritted teeth, frowning eyebrows, and feeling.

They don't usually talk about people. So Sam listens.

Considering the amount of time Dean devotes talking about how Novak walked into his office, stride radiating importance as though he'd been summoned by Dean himself - well, he really must be a pain in the ass.

Over the next week, Sam's not always outside when Dean comes home from work. When he finally is, on a Thursday, Dean plants himself across him and starts speaking immediately.

Sam closes his book, purses his lips and pays attention.

Castiel, he's become.

Horrible, he's remained.

When Dean's done ranting, the sun's gone down. He gets up, hands on his hips. "He's just a jackass about everything, Sammy. Who's pretentious about eyecolor? Nobody's eyes can be that blue."

Sam nods sympathetically.

Dean goes away to make dinner, satisfied.

Midterms are round the corner.

Without really paying attention to it, Sam's stopped flipping through his handbook, and started highlighting in his textbook. He stays up late, and wakes up early, determinedly chipping away at the ginorminous block of syllabus, bit by bit.

He also stops being out on the porch when Dean comes back from work, and Dean tends to not barge into his bedroom to talk about the awful people he works with, so that's that.

But dinner isn't saved.

It's a simple conversation about mashed potatoes, and Dean goes off. "You won't believe how ridiculous Castiel is about honey, dude." Sam asks for a second helping, he also receives an anecdote on Castiel's ungrateful attitude towards Dean.

Sam doesn't even dare to mention his dislike for bacon once, for all the times Dean offers him it - because he's sure he'd get another indepth analysis of how Castiel hates Dean.

But when they settle down to watch Law & Order after dinner that night, Sam gets a chance to think. He wonders, not for the first time, how truly terrible Cas must be, for Dean to talk about him all the frigging time, and by the end of the episode, he's decided to be the pillar of support his brother needs, right now.

So when Dean starts, randomly, about how Castiel doesn't even appreciate good music, Sam whips out his puppy eyes, and listens to the entire tale.

Weeks pass.

His first paper is Tuesday, Ethics. Sam spends most hours of the day on his desk, holed up in his room.

It would be unfair to Dean to say he used up all the time Sam did spend around him, to talk about Cas.

(Which Castiel had ended up being, obviously.)

He only used like sixty percent of it.

"He's just...a weird, dorky little guy." Dean ends, biting his lip, eyes cast to the floor. His hands play with the hem of his jacket - he's still in work clothes.

Sam sighs.

"You know what?" Dean stands up. "I'm going to make coffee. Do I get you a mug or a thermos?"

"Thermos, please." Sam calls after him, gratefully.

"Okay. Carry on, bitch."

Sam feels guilty.

He's been so caught up in college, deadlines and exams, he's hardly talked to Dean except to thank him for all the coffee and sandwiches.

Dean may be a jerk all year, but he can get really supportive when Sam needs him to be.

Sam feels bad for not doing the same.

So when Dean puts a peanut butter sandwich in front of him, at one am while Sam panics through his last night revision, he looks up at his brother blankly and asks. "Hey, how's the guy who's been making your life hell? You stopped telling me about him."

"Oh, uh." Dean pauses.

Sam waits, but Dean takes too long, as if he's contemplating, so he takes a bite of his sandwich instead.

"He's not that bad." Dean finally lets out, exhaling into a hint of a smile.

Sam raises his eyebrows.

"To you kicking Stanford's ass!" Dean raises his bottle, perhaps the sixth toast of the night, giant grin plastered on his face.

"I keep telling you the results are a far way from being out yet - but hear, fucking hear!" Sam clinks his glass to Dean's beer, smile equally wide. He's finally done. There's finally no more papers, no more tests, no more revision.

He made it through.

"I'm proud of you." Dean mutters lazily, leaning back on the seat.

"Y-yeah. I know." Sam returns joyfully, neither of them really thinking about what they're saying. They've been drinking for hours. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah. I know." Dean repeats, and proceeds to chuckle at his words. There's a moment of silence - well, as silent as it ever gets in the Roadhouse. Then Dean speaks up. "Guess what, Sammy?"

Sam doesn't even correct him.

"What?"

"I'm going to ask Cas out today." Dean declares, and Sam's eyebrows go up again, because while he's definitely known his brother's into guys for years, he hadn't expected Dean to come out like this.

But six beers in, and a declaration of pride out, Dean just ups and says it.

"I think I have a crush on him."

Many months go by. It's Sam's final year. And he's moving back onto campus.

"I'm going to miss you." Sam tells Dean, after they've finished lugging all of his bags into Jessica's room. Dean's half sitting on Baby's hood, and Sam has his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Shuddup." Dean throws back, and he definitely sounds weird. "I'm like, seven minutes away."

"Still." Sam grins, earnest.

"Yeah, alright. I'm not making you move out, okay?" Dean straightens, scoffing. "Have fun convincing Jessica to make you breakfast food at midnight."

"Yeah but," Sam laughs. "You live like, seven minutes away."

"Like hell I do. Get your ninety-percent peanut butter ass over here." Dean sighs, and Sam walks up to him, letting Dean pull him into a hug.

They hold onto each other, safety in the familiarity. Both of them know that they're probably not going to live together again. Sam has a plan after college, which doesn't involve moving back to Dean's. But they've shared a house for so long, it's going to feel weird.

It's going to be strange.

To lighten the moment, Sam whispers. "So, uh. Cas is moving in after I'm gone, isn't he?"

"He's probably already redecorating the place to get rid of your nerd cooties." Dean thumps him on the back, as they separate. There's a smile lingering on his face.

"What about your nerd cooties?" Sam bitchfaces at him.

"He likes those." Dean defends, crossing his arms on his chest.

"I bet he does." Sam snorts, and Dean reddens, realizing he just walked right into that, and then he just swears under his breath goodnaturedly as Sam walks into his new place.

Sam's phone rings.

It's only eight, on a Saturday, and Sam doesn't have to leave for office at nine like everyday, so he's sleeping in. Amelia's next to him, and she elbows him when the annoying ringtone wakes her before it wakes Sam.

"Sorry, babe." Sam tells her, kissing the top of her head distractedly, picking up the phone and sitting up when he hears Dean's voice.

It's trembling with excitement.

"Sam!" Dean gushes, and there's really no other word for it. There seems to be a commotion behind him, but the happy kind. Dean's tone is almost ecstatic.

"Dean?" Sam confirms, groggily.

"Dude, Cas just asked me to marry him!" Dean let out, almost breathless. "And I said yes! Of course, I said yes! We're getting married, Sammy!."

A smile grows on Sam's face. "Dude. You're getting married."

"I'm getting married!" Dean repeats, and proceeds to chuckle at something Cas is saying apparently, because then he tells Sam he's putting him on speaker.

"Hello, Sam." Cas greets him, sounding thoroughly overjoyed.

"Congratulations, Cas." Sam says, beaming now. He's so happy for them both. Cas is amazing, and he gets Dean, and Sam knows Dean loves him so much. "And, uh, Dean? You better fight a good fight for my Bestmanship, versus Castiel's brother, okay?"

Dean laughs, and it's the kind of rare excited laugh which makes everyone around smile too.

Cas answers, instead, his voice just as excited. "Don't worry, I'd rather have Gabriel be the caterer."

Sam chuckles. "Good."

"Give the phone back a minute, Cas," Dean says in the background, and then it's off-speaker, and just Dean, again. "You're not busy being important or anything, are you?"

Sam looks around him. "No?" Dean hesitates for a beat, until Sam catches the gist. "Dude! Of course I'm not busy. Tell me everything!" Dean lets out a sound which is definitely a squeal, though he'd never own up to it. "How did it happen? Why did it happen so early?"

Dean exhales, happily, and Sam can picture the smile on his face.

"Wait, is there a ring? Dean, I need you to show me the ring." Sam adds, just before Dean starts to tell Sam about it all. Just like he had, at the very beginning.

Six days to the wedding, Sam sits on the old porch chair, tapping his pen on his notebook.

He needs to write a speech.

There's so much to tell. The two of them are adorable, for god's sake. They tend to be cheesy even in front of him, and so unaware of it - Sam wonders if they turn into mushy marshmallows when his back is turned.

Maybe he should include that in his speech. "Mushy Marshmallows" is a cute alliteration. Huh.

After an entire evening of thinking, he pushes himself off his seat to get a cup of coffee. (He'd try to convince Dean to make some, but him and Cas have an appointment with a florist for the wedding.)

In any case, Sam may not be done with the speech entirely, but he figures he's earned a break. You see, he's already got an unbelievably great title. He can work from there.

"How Dean Is The Worst Judge Of People."

He has a good first line, too. "Exhibit A: Novak-slash-Castiel-slash-Cas."

#destiel #deancas fluff #deancas fic #deancas au #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #castiel/dean #castiel/dean winchester #young castiel #young dean winchester #stanford sam #sam winchester fluff #sam and dean #destiel ficlet #domestic destiel #i wrote a thing #dean is bi

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oimoi-op · 4 years

Note

when were you diagnosed with t1d?

Ok, so storytime! Short answer is, as of today, barely over two months ago.

(Very long post warning y’all, contains hospital mention and extensive, possibly upsetting descriptions of health conditions, specifically DKA)

My family doesn’t really have a history of T1D or even T2D, though my second-cousin-once-removed has had T1D for over a decade now. So, there was never any reason for me to try and get tests done for it. The only sign I really had up until last semester was two copies of a variant of an HLA gene that I knew about from a 23andMe report (which, according to the report, put me at a higher risk for celiac’s and nothing else), but of course at that time I had no idea that that could mean anything serious; after all, that sort of thing only happens to other people, right?

My college started in-person classes in the latter half of August. By October, I started feeling tired, having a lack of appetite, and needing water very, very badly. I actually went to my school’s clinic, and my erratic heartbeat prompted the doctor to recommend me for a Covid-19 test. My school’s protocols meant that I had to quarantine at my home (since I live within two hours of campus) until I got a negative test result. At home, I was drinking water all the time and sleeping constantly, and my parents had commented on how I’d been losing weight. I thought these were all good things. I had been slightly overweight at my high school graduation, and I’d always heard that drinking a lot of water is good for you, so I thought I was actually in excellent health even if I kind of felt like shit most of the time.

Well. Uh. I was wrong.

When finals came around in mid-November, I was just fucking tired. I’d get a decent eight hours of sleep and still have to take naps during the day. Hell, I was even late for work because I slept through one of my nap alarms. Studying was a pain in the ass. Attending classes was a pain in the ass. Staying awake for Zoom classes was a pain in the ass. I was waking up at 5 am to go to the bathroom, and then I would drink the rest of my water, refill it, drink half of it again, and then go back to sleep. Finally, November 20th rolled around, and I got to leave campus. It was my birthday (yeah I am a Scorpio and that weirds all of my friends out lol), and my parents took me to Fusion. And I just...couldn’t eat at all? I love hibachi, but I couldn’t even eat half of my food. The chef even got me a delicious banana split that I had to basically bully my younger sister into eating with me.

For the next week, I was sleeping about 18 hours a day. I didn’t think this was weird because I’d just had finals so yeah, it makes sense that I would be tired after exams and whatnot. I went shopping with my mom, sister, and sister’s bff. We were only out for a few hours, but I was fucking wiped out y’all, like in pain. Thanksgiving arrived, and again, I love food, I love eating, but I was not hungry in the slightest. I basically had to force myself to eat some of my favorite holiday foods just so I wouldn’t offend my mom, and then I didn’t eat for the day.

The very next morning, I was puking my guts out.

This started a pattern for the next few days: I would eat chicken noodle soup or some other food, sleep like the dead, and throw up every morning and every night. I started chugging large bottles of Gatorade constantly (which, if you know about diabetes and its health complications, did not help my situation in the slightest). I started breathing erratically after very little exertion. Like, I’m talking standing up and stretching brought about heavy, labored breathing. I weighed myself on my parents’ scale, and I was under 130 lbs. Now, for some people this might seem like a lot, but due to my height and build I could fucking see some of my ribs. That was when I started to realize that something was very, very wrong, but “losing weight is good” and I didn’t want my parents to laugh at me for voicing concerns (though, for all their faults, in hindsight, I doubt they would’ve). Yeah. Don’t do that, folks, that’s not a good mindset to have.

On Sunday, my mom took me to town to get tested for Covid. This was despite me saying that I didn’t have symptoms (which I knew very well due to some of my friends catching it at school). Rapid test came back negative, so I did a culture test. Hell, while I was sitting in the damn chair, I was about to pass out. I asked for a nausea pill but my mouth was too dry for it to dissolve. I got a cup of water, downed it all, and felt like my throat was on fire. For the rest of the day I felt so, so awful. At some point I was walking toward my bed in my room and I fucking fell. I’m fucking lucky there was carpet.

Regarding the rest of that night, things start to get blurry, for the lack of a better term. I legitimately cannot recall everything that happened that night or the following two days, so I will just try to explain it in the way I remember it best.

Around...midnight or one??? I was on fucking fire, so I went to my bathroom and decided to lie on the floor. The floor was hardwood and not at all cold, and it wasn’t fucking comfortable even in that state, but I was just in so much pain I didn’t even care. My mom must’ve heard because she found me there and asked me what I was doing. I said something about the floor. She asked me to go back to bed, but I must’ve scared her because she asked me if I wanted her to lie in the bed with me. I don’t remember what I said to her, but we were in the bed and she was trying to hug me, but she was too warm and so I told her to stop. I kept feeling this burning just below my chest, like there was acid in me (which I guess wasn’t too far off), so I would randomly sit up to try and alleviate the pain and not cry. I remember asking my mom to take me to the hospital in the morning.

My mom put me in the truck (I think around 5 am is what she told me). I remembered hearing my dad. I was lying down. Then I was awake, but I was on the floor. I thought this was wrong so I tried to tell my mom that but I guess I couldn’t talk. Then I was in a hospital bed, the ER I assume. My mom gave me some water with a sponge, and I was just so fucking thirsty. Then I was in the ICU hooked up to a bunch of machines. I didn’t know what was going on, but my mom kept giving me water with that sponge. That is all I remember from Monday.

I remember a little bit more from Tuesday. My mom said something about diabetes, but that didn’t make any sense to me because I wasn’t “fat” and I’d been losing weight, even! What had I done to get diabetes? I was thirsty and tired, so I slept a lot. At some point I really needed to use the restroom so I unhooked my IV???? (I mean I must’ve disconnected myself somehow but I can’t remember the details) which set off a shit ton of alarms and people were Very Concerned and kept asking me Why Did You Do That? But I just needed to go to the restroom, and they told me to use the Red Button to Call the Nurse (it was already there, and I now realize that we’d probably had a similar conversation about the Red Button to Call the Nurse possibly multiple times before this) in the future. A Chopped Teen Tournament from 2017 was playing on the TV nonstop. There were commercials for CGMs. I thought that God wasn’t being very funny about the whole thing.

As of now I remember even less of Wednesday, but I know that felt better. There was this diabetes specialist who kept talking about insulin and life at college moving forward, but I wasn’t really there, either because of being so out of it for health reasons, disassociating, or a combination of the two. My mom told me she had emailed a professor so he would give me an extension on an assignment that was due by then, and I remember crying because I thought that was just so nice of him. That night, this guy got me in a wheelchair and put me in another room, which I would later learn was the ACU. My night nurse was this nice woman named Tanya, who had a very thick Eastern European accent. She got me orange juice to take some potassium pills, but it felt like swallowing rocks. I didn’t really get a lot of sleep, so I was awake when the nurses changed shifts. I remember one of them expressing surprise that I was out of the ICU so early.

My mom took longer to come that day because nobody had told her I’d been moved. I’d had plain Cheerios and orange juice for breakfast, but I couldn’t really eat because my throat hurt so badly. I talked to a lot of doctors. I guess at this point or somewhere near it I accepted that I had diabetes, but it wasn’t really real until the same diabetes specialist was going over carbs. I thought I was never going to eat shit I liked ever again. I really wanted a fucking McChicken sandwich. I signed some papers for Medicaid because I had aged out of the CHIP while in the hospital. I finally texted my friends and explained to them what had happened. I was so fucking tired.

I got out the next day, so that was Thursday. Normally, I would’ve been in the hospital much longer (especially because my Medicaid hadn’t been approved, meaning no insurance had approved of my insulin yet), but Covid cases were on the rise and the hospital wanted me out of there. The diabetes specialist and one of my nurses snuck me two fast-acting and two basal insulin pens, and I was out. I ate half a McChicken, a small fry, and drank my first Diet Coke. It tasted like diesel mixed with piss.

That’s the gist of it. The hospital staff was very nice and thoughtful the entire time, I think. I felt as though everyone involved cared about my health a lot.

For those of you who aren’t T1D or just don’t know, what I experienced is called DKA, short for diabetic ketoacidosis. To simplify, I was very close to entering a diabetic coma. My sister later told me that our dad had said (I assume a doctor had told my mother, who, in turn, had told him) that I was “approximately 45 minutes” away from death. DKA happens when a diabetic (usually a T1D like me) has too much blood sugar in their body due to them lacking the insulin necessary to break the sugar down, so their body breaks down their fat reserves and muscle to get the energy it needs. This is why I lost around 50 pounds over the course of a few months (I was 118 lbs. when I entered the hospital, the lowest I’ve been since grade school). I was officially diagnosed with T1D on November 30th, just ten days after my 19th birthday, which is a little older than normal I believe. It’s...well, it’s not fun, but I feel very grateful for my large support system, and tomorrow I’m trying out a CGM for the first time and applying for both it and a pump, so things are really looking up

#personal #iamapincushion #t1d #type one diabetes #type one diabetic #dka #diabetic ketoacidosis #tw hospital #tw dka #i don't think you meant me for to respond with such a long answer #but #well #it's something i've been wanting to post for a while now and this seemed like a good opportunity

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christineeej94 · 4 years

Text

Heal me❤

a/n: passed my first exam so I’m happy. Thank you for your patient and your support. Also, this request is giving me vibes and i can’t wait to watch the season 3 again. Stay safe and great. Kisses 🌻

The request:

Would you be able to do an Ander Muñoz imagine kinda based off of his last appointment & they find out that he’s in remission but him & his girlfriend aren’t together & don’t get back together until after because he realizes that she really does love him no matter what & she will be with through every step of the way :)

Warnings: bad language, fluff and bad writing

Word count:1.901

♠️♠️♠️♠️♠️

Ander Muñoz x Reader

I put on my uniform and I feel my phone vibrating in my hand. I got a message from Nadia which informed me that she is in in front of my home. I kissed my naná on the cheeks and I took an apple from the bowl as my breakfast. In the last period I didn’t eat too much. When I found out that Ander has cancer, I felt awful. I tried to stay strong for him and I’m keeping myself positive and I know that everything is going to be alright.

“Hey, cariña.” I greet my best friend and she fixed me with that look. “You lost weight and you are like all the time sad, what happened?” I smiled lightly and my thought flies to my boyfriend. He decided not tell anyone until he is ready to confess. He doesn’t like mercy or fake smiles around him. “Nothing, I’m not in a good mood, that’s it.” I cut her out and we went said by said until be arrive to our school. I was one of the scholarship students and when I got here last year, I hate this school and everyone who is in it. But now I can tell that I made some nice friends and I have the cutest boyfriend.

His attitude changed when he found out. I was at his house, we should have done some homework but our hormones got crazy. When I touched him between his legs, I feel something hard, like two small rocks under the skin. I tell him to go to hospital because I didn’t think this is normal and next day we went together. He went alone to get the results and when we met at my home, he told me. I cried all night next to him and I think he heard me.

At school, Azucena called me in her office. She is like a mother for me and she support my relationship with Ander. “(Y/N), close the door.” She told me smiling and I see on her face that she is very tired. “Something happened to Ander?” I sit on the chair in front of her desk and she nodded. “He is getting very tired and last night we moved him to downstairs.” “Why don’t you called me, I couldn’t come and help.” I said and she grins. ”I know, Ander didn’t let me. But this isn’t the motive for calling you here. Ander is almost finishing the chemotherapy and I want you to come with us at the hospital and find together if he healed or not.” I know everything about Ander’s program. “Of course, I will be there. But when the consultation should happen?” “In two weeks.” She informed me and I get up. “Thank you, see you at the chemo?” Azucena approves and I get out.

“Why you were inside my mom office?” Ander voice scared me and I turn around to find an Ander with no curls. “You cut your hair.” He doesn’t say anything and this is scaring me. He loves his hair and I thought it was hard for him. “Why don’t you let me do it? I could help you.” I said and I took his hand in mine. “My mom helped me, but you didn’t answer to my first question.” We walked together to the class and we stopped in front of the door. “She told me about your final consultation, that’s all.” I said and I get on my tip-toes to kiss his lips. “I love you, bebé.” He smiled and we enter in the class.

Everybody wide their eyes when they observe Ander new hairstyle. I rub his hand to encourage him. “It’s for chemotherapy, I had cancer. I’m too tired to give explanations.” He said sharply and move to the seat next to mine. Everyone looks surprised with the exception of Rebe. I feel like Ander lied to me but I let this for later.

In our lunch break I went with Nadia to the library and we eat together. “Why don’t you tell me?” she approaches the subject and I look at my food. I can’t take another bite. My stomach hurts so bad and I’m feeling that I’m going to faint in any second. I rub my forehead with my shaky fingers and my view blur for two seconds. “(Y/N), are you okay?” Nadia jumped off from her chair and came next to me. “Yeah, I need some rest. I think I’m going home.” I get up and we hugged tight. “I’ll call you when I get home, okay?” On the hallway I saw Rebe and Ander murmuring and they look very close to each other. “I’m not feeling well, I think I’m going home.” I said when I got in front of him and my boyfriend face blanched. “What you two are talking about?” I asked and I feel my legs very weak. Rebe bites her lower lip and walk away. I look to Ander and I wait for him to explain. “Actually, Rebe helped me to cut my hair and also she came with me when I found out about my disease.” “So, you went with her and you asked her for help when I could do this for you? Or it’s something else? You slept with her?” His face reveals the truth. And I explode like a volcano. “Hijo de puta. I stayed home, waiting and you fucked that puta?” I yelled and everyone is looking at us. From my corner of my eyes I can see Azucena getting out of her office and fix us. “I stayed with you in good times or bad times, I supported you and I come at all of your chemotherapies. I have suffered with you and I’m crying every night thinking about you.” My voice got lower and my head feels that something hard hit it. “You don’t understand, I don’t want to make you suffering.” He said and I nodded. My gaze got blur and I make a step backward. “You are breaking up with me?” I mumbled, but he heard me. I can’t see clearly his beautiful face and I wanted to touch for last time his face.

“It’s better this way.” Ander said and he walked away. My tears are going to explode but when I want to run away my legs collapsed and I fell. “¡Joder!” I heard Guzmán voice and I felt some arms around me.

I woke up at the hospital, at the emergency room. Nadia and Lu are next to me and Guzmán is sitting on the single chair from the room with his phone on knees. “Hey, you woke up. How are you feeling?” Lu asked me and I remember that when I first got in Las Encinas we hate each other. “A little dizzy and weak, but fine.” My voice is husky and my head hurts do bad. “The doctor said that you didn’t feed well so that’s why you collapsed. He also said that after he will come with your medicine prescription, you are free to go home.” Nadia informed me and I nodded. I wanted to ask about Ander but I couldn’t spell any word. I drink some water and my phone vibrating on the table.

“Azucena is calling you.” Lu said and I nodded. “Decline the call.” I replied and I get up. “Guzmán, can you drive me and Nadia home?” He nodded and a tall man, dressed like a doctor come inside my room. He gave me a paper with some indications and a few medicines and get out. All the time Azucena called me and I shut down my phone. In this moment I don’t to think about him or anything concerning to him. If he wants this, to give me away then I will respect his decision.

In the week and half that passed I didn’t go to school and I almost I got expelled, but Azucena gave me another chance and today I’m coming to the high school to retire me from Las Encinas. I decided to leave this town, because anything isn’t keeping me here. Nadia and Lu will go to college in New York, my nana doesn’t remember who I am and Ander doesn’t want me beside him. I’m going to start a new chapter somewhere else, maybe Marbella or Barcelona.

“(Y/N), wait.” Guzmán yelled after me and I stopped. “What?” I know that I look horrible and my suitcase is exploding for who much clothes I put in it. I just got out from Azucena’s office and I just let her my paper on the desk. I said to her to tell Ander that I love him and I’ll never forget him. Guzmán catches my hand in his and look deeply in my eyes. “Ander loves you, don’t give up, please. Don’t go.” My heart is heavy and my eyes are watery. “I already decide, I’m sorry.” “He told me that he was stupid to break up to you.” I stopped myself but I didn’t turn around.

I got to train station and I remembered that today is his final consultation, when he should find out if he is on remission or nor. All my memories with him passed my mind and I even don’t realize when I started to cry. People around me are starting to stare at me and I get why. I’m looking like a freak, crying like a baby and I’m thinking at Ander and at our relationship. Fuck, I love him so much and I’m giving up like a stupid. I should fight with him and be on his side.

I run like a desperate in the hospital hallways to find the cabinet of Ander’s doctor. My suitcase slows me down and I can see Ander on a bench. “Bebé!” I yelled and he get up looking surprised at me. I can see happiness on his beautiful face. I throw away my suitcase and I run faster until I’m, finally, in his arms. We fell on the floor and my covers his face. I feel his torso vibrating under me because of his laughing and my face is wet for tears. “You came, amor.” He giggles and we get up. “Of course, I figured out that I can’t let you like that, I couldn’t give up on us.” I said and I hugged him. “I didn’t fuck with Rebeca, we just kissed but it wasn’t nothing important, I swear.” Ander puts his hand on his heart and I smiled. I know but I let him believe this because he deserved to suffer like me. “It doesn’t matter, bebé, because now I’m here and I’m never walk away from you. I’ll be with you and I’ll support you.”

He smiled and pressed a kiss on my lips. “We shouldn’t be inside?” I asked and we sit on the bench. “Actually, I just get out. I’m on remission.” He spoke and my heart stopped for beating. “Dios mio, that’s fantastic.” I scream and a nurse looked at me not very nice. “We should celebrate!” I get up and he rub nervous his neck. “I want to be just you and me tonight, what do you say?” I grin and I kissed his lips. “That would be nice, Andres.” I replied and he laughs. His laughing is making my love for him growing.

#aron imagine #aron piper #aron piper imagine #aron x reader #aron piper x reader #aron piper x you #ander munoz #ander munoz x reader #elite imagine #elite #elite cast

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earthstellar · 3 years

Photo

It’s Deaf Awareness Week, so I’m posting my hearing disabled Drift fan fiction in full below the cut!

I am still fundraising for my hearing aids, so if you like the story and would like to donate, you can do so at my Ko-Fi or via PayPal.

You can also see my post on Chirolinguistics and Sign Language in Transformers media here!

Auditory Error by Capricorn_Stellium - Word Count: 2733

Summary:

The Lost Light visits a marketplace on a newly identified planet in the hopes of restocking on a few crucial supplies.

Unfortunately, things go less than well, and Drift is hit with some sort of energy disruptor-- Which results in processor damage.

Once everyone is back on board and clear of the fight, Ratchet and First Aid get to work attempting to assess Drift post-injury in a MedBay that is suddenly far, far too noisy.

"Stay where you are. Don't move! First Aid, get over here, get on his left side."

It was Ratchet's voice, or at least, he thought it was.

Drift was in the MedBay, so evidently they'd made it back to the Lost Light.

He quickly tried to assess himself: No missing limbs, so that's nice. Doesn't seem to be much frame damage, no evidence of blaster shots or blade damage anywhere across his armour that he could see.

Not that he could see much, as Ratchet was aggressively trying to get him to lay his helm back down flat against the medical berth.

"He's awake. Aid, titrate the sedative, I don't want him dizzy but keep it level so he's not running around." Ratchet moved to the side of the berth from where he had been standing so far, somewhere behind his helm, but it was odd. His voice seemed to come from all directions at once, and it was disorienting.

"Drift, can you focus on me? You were hit in the helm by one of the marketplace traders; Turns out Rodimus was wrong about the locals being friendly, because of course he was. Nobody else is hurt, so don't even try getting up! I don't know what they hit you with, some kind of focused disruptor of some kind. We're running additional scans to try to figure it out, but stay down for now. You aren't restrained, no painkillers. Just a mild physical sedative in the event you woke up swinging. I'm too old to keep having to fight my patients, you know."

It was bizarre; He felt totally fine. He could hear that Ratchet was speaking, but the words were... Missing, here and there. All of the sounds in the room were equally as loud, completely drowning each other out. It was overwhelming and disorienting.

He'd been in the MedBay enough times both as a patient and just waiting for Ratchet to get off shift that he was well aware it shouldn't sound like this. It was as if every piece of machinery was at maximum volume and surely Ratchet was whispering, but why would he be whispering? Was there something else going on? Was Ratchet's vocaliser damaged somehow? Why would Ratchet lie about the situation, unless it was serious?

Ratchet noticed Drift's increasingly heavy frown; He looked fairly alert, but confused. Running another quick diagnostic scan, nothing new was coming up. Drift had been concussed, he'd already known about that. The more extensive diagnostic panel wouldn't be complete for another minute or two.

"Aid, I told you to moderate--" First Aid interrupted by holding up what was the needle end of a clearly disconnected fuel line drip.

"He's not being sedated actively at all anymore, Ratchet. It should work it's way out of his systems soon, low level dose should remain for the next three to five hours but not significantly enough to produce a frame relaxing effect. Intensive scan is just about ready, give it a moment. We'll figure it out."

Ratchet huffed. He was proud of his star apprentice, but it was irritating to get blatant reassurance from a junior doctor.

Not that First Aid was wrong to comment; It was hard to administer emergency care to your own conjunx. In other circumstances, it would never be allowed at all, but the Lost Light was a perpetual mess. A good mess, most of the time. But still not quite as organised as some might prefer-- A fact that Ultra Magnus never let anyone forget.

Speaking of Magnus, the paperwork for this would be a nightmare, but Ratchet had other concerns on his mind.

Drift raised a servo to his faceplate, careful not to lift his helm lest Ratchet come after him again. "I... feel okay, I think. But I never had a concussion that made everything sound so... I don't know. Things sound wrong all of a sudden."

Ratchet and First Aid looked at each other from across their respective sides of the medical berth. Aid pulled out a data pad and began taking notes once Ratchet nodded in the affirmative to proceed.

"What do you mean? Can you describe what you're feeling?"

Drift ex-vented. "Physically, totally fine. Not even a headache, really. Everything else seems okay, but it's like... Everything is at the same volume, and is coming from everywhere all the time. I can hardly make out what you and Aid are saying, every other word is gone, it's easier for me to focus on the vague sort of rhythm of the noises you're making rather than what you're actually talking about. Like the words are messed up and lost in the sounds of everything else. But, I don't know. It's like everything is a flood of noise, except for speech, I guess? Keep talking to me, I'll figure it out."

It was Ratchet's turn to frown. "Hmm." He backed up a little from the side of the berth. "Drift, can you shutter your optics for a second? I won't touch you, but I want you to listen as best you can, okay?" Drift nodded, wondering what Ratchet was up to.

Closing his optics felt awful; It made the noises seem even louder and more all-encompassing, somehow. Hopefully this wouldn't take long. He was glad Ratchet had kept him on the berth; It was a dizzying sensation. Like the noise was giving him vertigo.

"I'm going to snap my digits in different areas and at different distances from your helm. I want you to tell me where you hear the sound in relation to yourself, so for example, upper left from your point of view, or lower right, or straight ahead. Okay?"

Drift nodded, hoping he'd heard the instructions correctly. It was suddenly much harder to fill the gaps in Ratchet's speech when he couldn't watch his faceplate while he was speaking.

The exam went on for a while until finally Ratchet snapped his digits for the last time to Drift's righthand side, but Drift stated the sound was coming from straight ahead and slightly above his helm.

"Maybe a little to the right?" He could hear Ratchet ex-vent, but from where, he couldn't tell. "Nope. Open your optics, Drift. Sorry to say you didn't exactly pass that test." He turned to face First Aid, who had apparently been following along and taking quite a few notes.

Turns out both of them were stood exactly where they were when the exam had started. Weird. To Drift, it had seemed like their intermittent words were floating around him while his optics had been shuttered. Had they moved at all, the entire time?

The noise of all the medical machinery was getting awful. How were Ratchet and Aid okay with it?

Then he realised they probably couldn't hear it. Somehow...

Ratchet's voice knocked him out of the state of distress he was rapidly falling into the more he tried to think about all the noise. "Aid, note a general lack of directional hearing. No loss of hearing overall, his audials are registering sound as usual, but..."

First Aid looked up from the data pad. "But the way his processor is interpreting the sounds he's hearing is wrong."

"Correct. It's processor damage. Damn."

Drift had missed what was probably a very important word, there. "Sorry, what kind of damage?"

Ratchet, to his credit, only looked upset for a very brief moment. But Drift could tell; He could always tell with his Ratty. And that look was never good.

"Sorry, Drift. We shouldn't talk about you like you aren't here, anyway; It's a bad habit medics can develop."

That got a small smile out of Drift. "Since when are you worried about bad medic habits? You routinely throw wrenches at your patients."

"Hey, that's usually only Whirl. And Rodimus. And..." Ratchet took one of Drift's servos into his own. "Fine, you have a point, but this is serious. We need to run more tests. And by more, I mean you're going to be in here for a while."

Drift nodded, not wanting to speak himself lest it break his intense concentration on Ratchet's intake. It definitely seemed like trying to follow Ratchet's faceplate movements made it easier to guess what words he was missing.

The words he could no longer hear. For some reason.

It was only years of experience performing various mindfulness meditations that prevented Drift's anxiety from escalating.

First Aid walked towards the foot of the medical berth to be more fully in Drift's line of sight before addressing him.

And he proceeded to say something that Drift totally missed, because First Aid's battle mask made it impossible to read his faceplates in the way that he could with Ratchet.

"Uh... I don't want to interrupt? But two things: Aid, can you retract your mask?" Both First Aid and Ratchet stiffened immediately.

"I'm so sorry--" "Drift, if you can't understand us, just say so and we can--"

And it was too much noise.

Instinctively, his servos flew up to cover his audials, which hadn't helped as much as he had hoped it might.

"Stop! Stop, I'm sorry, it's okay. Don't worry about it. But the second thing, is that it's way, way too much in here. The noise, I mean. It's a lot."

Ratchet gently grabbed Drift's wrists, getting closer in the process.

"The scan we were running has finished by now. Aid, turn off everything we're not currently using, let's see if it makes a difference in the ambient noise level. Go ahead and start interpreting the results, construct a summary, you know what to do."

As First Aid got started as directed, looking somewhat upset that he hadn't thought to retract his battle mask earlier, Ratchet moved in even closer to speak directly into Drift's audial.

On the other side of Drift's helm, he cupped a servo over the opposite audial to help block out the surrounding noise and force Drift's processor to focus on the most immediate input: His voice. "I'm sorry. I'll try to make this as easy on you as I possibly can, okay? We're not hearing things the way you are, so we'll have to figure this out as we go. But that's fine; You're okay... You will be okay."

Vision obscured by Ratchet's shoulder armour while intensely trying to focus on his voice, suddenly, it hit Drift.

He could hear, but he couldn't hear. Not really.

A thousand scenarios flooded him at once, each one more terrifying than the last.

Being in a battle, unable to tell where bullets were coming from. Hearing a ship-wide alarm go off, and being incapacitated by the noise, unable to react otherwise. Unable to help. Unable to protect Ratchet. Never being able to parse anyone's speech, always missing words, never having all the information.

Going to a racetrack and being disoriented by the hum of all the wheels and engines at high speed, causing an accident. Anywhere noisy, anyone talking. Anywhere sound exists, it would be too much or not enough and never in-between.

He couldn't fight effectively. He wouldn't able to communicate effectively, not if he constantly misheard every single thing. The stress just from the MedBay noise was horrendous; What about in the middle of a conflict, or the command deck, or even someplace like Swerve's? Totally unbearable.

He would go right back to being isolated. He would be a problem for others. A burden, an annoyance.

What if this wasn't fixable?

He gasped like he had been choking, causing Ratchet to startle and pull back. "Ratchet! Ratchet, Ratty, what if-- What if you can't fix me?"

And he knew that look.

He felt Ratchet's arm move slightly somewhere behind him, and First Aid swiftly and silently left; He would finish looking over the results in his own office space. Ratchet had probably flashed some kind of medic secret code hand signal or something.

Or maybe it was just awkward to watch your mentor's partner start crying in your shared workplace. It was probably that, and the thought would have made Drift laugh if he didn't suddenly have a terrible headache.

Ratchet made the most of his wide set medical frame type, and completely wrapped Drift in a hug.

It helped. Everything seemed like too much right now, but this, he could never possibly get enough of.

Fluid had pooled behind his optics; Some started to trickle down in small streams. Ratchet wiped some of it away gently.

"Drift, I'm not going to lie. I already know what those scan results are going to say; There's nothing wrong with you, aside from whatever is going wrong with your processor. And I'm going to be honest, because you know I don't lie when it comes to my diagnostics... If I'm right about the nature of your processor damage, it's most likely not something that can be repaired."

Even though on some level he figured that might be the case, it felt like Ratchet had jammed the Great Sword through his spark.

Before he had the chance to completely break down, Ratchet carefully grabbed the sides of Drift's helm, gently rubbing soft swirls in his faceplate and ensuring Drift didn't just fold in on himself and completely collapse.

He wanted Drift to be able to understand; Keeping his helm up like this would help Drift read his faceplate, too.

"I know. It's not good news. But we can work with it. You can work with it. We'll figure it out. If we don't have the supplies we need to make whatever assistive device we might have to come up with, we'll find a way to get them, or make them. You have me, Perceptor, Brainstorm, a whole ship full of people who can and will help you. Okay?"

Drift wanted to nod, he really did, but the tears welling up in his optics had blurred his vision, and the thought of being unable to see clearly while being unable to hear clearly was so completely distressing to him that he simply threw his arms around Ratchet's neck strut and let himself cry it out.

Not for long, and not very hard; He found that the sound of his own crying was odd and grating to his audials, both muted and sharper than it should have been.

While he could stifle his tears, he couldn't stop his upset and frustration from seeping out through his EM field.

Ratchet's armour plating shivered a bit, before he met Drift's EM field with his own and wrapped him in another hug, spark to spark.

A surge of love, care, devotion- Ratchet's EM field helped soothe Drift's headache, and slowly, he calmed down. His vents evened out, the sound of the fans rattling no longer another sound adding to his distress.

"Sorry, Ratty. I just, this is... really bad."

"Yeah, it is. But we'll figure it out."

Drift's voice fell to almost a whisper. He couldn't fully hear himself speak, although he felt his vocaliser warm up. "There's this weird dissonance, like everything is too loud and too quiet all at once. Like all the small noises are massive and I can't hear anything I actually want to listen to. It reminds me of coming down from a syk hit, when my sensory data would get a little messed up."

Ratchet stilled, then tightened his hold on Drift. He was careful to speak directly into Drift's audial. "Rung is here too, you know. We're all here for you. I'm here for you."

He pulled back just enough to kiss Drift's faceplate, where the tears had left stains. Drift stared at his intake; He wasn't sure if it was to return the kiss, or if it was an attempt to try to follow along with his words.

"How about this: While Aid finishes up the report on your scan results, we can lay down in our hab suite and hopefully it'll be quiet enough there for you to get some real rest. I can give you a painkiller before we head out; Nothing heavy-duty, but sensory sensitivity can be unpleasant and I want you to actually recharge if you think you can. I can call Velocity in to handle my other patients for the evening."

He hadn't been this tired earlier, but he definitely was now. Drift nodded, leaning his helm up a bit to return Ratchet's kiss.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

#my fic #my writing #dratchet #mtmte #maccadam #lost light #tf drift #tf ratchet #ratchet #drift #transformers #idw transformers #fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 #chirolinguistics #disability in media #maccadams

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