#everyone seems to have it so easy
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there are three things i know for sure
1. my life is a mess
2. no one will ever find me attractive/ be attracted to me (dying alone wohoo)
3. i’m listening to music 24/7
#yupp#that’s it#my life is a mess#it’s a joke#I’m a joke#i’m actually losing it#crying#ugly#screaming shaking#vent#rant#i’ll never be loved#no one is gonna look at me and say: damn I want her#and I will die alone#but let’s be real#i’ll kill myself anyway so#tw sui ideation#mental health issues#bpd#actually bpd#i hate this#everyone seems to have it so easy#everyone but me#i’m fucked#but hey at least I have music#liesmultixxx talks 🩵#personal#i’m sorry
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Carry me home
#final fantasy xiv#ffxiv#final fantasy 14#ff14#haurchefant greystone#haurchefant x wol#haurchewol#ffxiv wol#ffxiv spoilers#heavensward spoilers#final fantasy xiv spoilers#tinydraws#let me know if i’m missing any spoiler tags#tagging seems like it would be an easy and straightforward thing but also. i’m stupid.#anyway i choose to believe that Rowan carried him back to the manor#even if someone tells me otherwise i will not believe them#also i choose to believe that these two had it bad for each other#neither of them said anything but everyone could tell lol#haurche specifically was very Not Subtle in his displays of affection#and Rowan for the most part picked up on it#not everything cuz she's still in the midst of working on accepting any amount of companionship. but like. most.#and went ‘honestly.... if i told him i liked him it would probably go well. We just have so much stuff to deal with; now’s not a good time'#and then the time came and went :’)#and Rowan went ‘Did….. did he know? Did he Know how much I loved him? did he KNOW???????’#and then she grieved behind closed doors away from everyone#and also tried to replace said grief by focusing a lil too hard on her duties#idk i’m still working out WOL lore but this is what i got so far lol#or at least in regards to haurche
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Normally, I wouldn't really say anything about the drama and stuff, because that's not what I'm here for and honestly I feel like a lot of it is just none of my business. But, it just feels so close to home for me that I can't help but say something. Because here's the thing people aren't going to talk about and probably don't even realize, but I think so much of this drama actually has to do with Dream being autistic.
Just notice the themes of what Tubbo said about Dream being weird, inappropriate, not considering the social boundaries, not communicating, coming across wrong… etc these are all things that can be attributed to Dream literally not knowing better because of neurodivergence. That’s not an excuse but an explanation to know the difference between Dream texting Tommy’s mom out of being manipulative versus not understanding how that breaks a social boundary. That’s not to say Dream should get a free pass to do whatever but I think in the same way we take into consideration other people’s ages and their naivety and obliviousness and inexperience into consideration, Dream’s neurodivergence should be considered too. It is valid. It makes a difference between manipulative and malicious intent versus simply not seeing it the same way.
And really the sad thing is, that I think people will always dislike Dream. At the end of the day, I think that will never change, because even if he was the most perfect person people would still dislike him because of an underlying subconscious response to him not being like the rest. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that he is made the villain in real life and in the dsmp, because it is simply a psychological fact that people inherently dislike autistic people. It’s not because they are ableist it’s just we don’t act like they do so that makes us weird and therefore unlikeable. And it’s hard to understand us because our brains our literally different and as has been said throughout history what we don’t understand we hate, we fear, we see as evil, we attack. Why does Dream get canceled and attacked over and over again? Not because they are true and it proves a pattern that he’s shitty, but because society is so desperate to find a more tangible reason to hate him other than the fact that they just do. Because his behavior breaks social rules he didn’t realize existed. Because he’s easy pickings. Because in my opinion it all comes down to autism and honestly until that piece is actually taken into consideration nothing will probably resolve.
#agh it’s so frustrating to watch something play out when you know exactly why because it’s played out in your own life#when you see people say things and yet not understand what eachother are saying#agdjnsgjfnwhd…it just… oh as an autistic person who has masked so well I have in many ways become the bridge between neurodivergent and#neurotypical it is infuriating to see this all unfolding for years and not being about to do anything to highlight what’s happening#dream#dreamblr#dreamwastaken#also like with politics - like you don’t get it but in the US south you can’t just hate everyone who votes a certain way or whatever because#you’d be hating your whole family your friends your boss your coworkers like it’s easy in Britain to have you high horse but that’s just not#how it is here… I can’t afford to just hate everyone it’s just not that simple#and when it comes to his sexuality. is it so unfair of him to just not know. like not want to say he’s straight or gay because he doesn’t#know… should we be allowed to figure things out…#….. I should go to bed I just I wanted to say something because tubbo making comments like - it’s not that black and white and stuff to an#autistic person had be slamming my head because yea it seems that way to us by default#probably delete this tomorrow… I don’t know… good night peeps
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Pages from trying to keep a little sketchbook-scrapbook type thing going for two weeks lol. I gave myself specific rules in hopes they might all end up more cohesive/consistent seeming, but alas, scribbly chaos reigns, it seems
#sketchbook#scrapbook#Actually I feel like these are kind of incomprehensible in photo form like.. In person holding the book its easy to look at#but as images on this scale I feel like there's so much tiny little text and small scribles and stuff you'd have to 'right click > open#image in new browser tab > zoom in' just to actually really see the thing. which for 7 images is excessive lol.. so. probably not the best#medium for sharing really but. I suppose I thought they might look cooler lined up next to each other. The whole part of using a#limited color palette is so that maybe they kind of seem to have more consistent color schemes or something throughout. but I dont#know if they look all that 'related' or not. I think these types of challenges I have always sucked at because I am a being of clutter and#excess. I can't just do like one little simple nice looking design and have that Crisp Neat calligraphy with evenhanded perfect lines#and perfect symmetical composition and etc. etc. Like some poeple post very aesthetically clean and cohesive looking sketch#pages or something but I simply cannot hold back the brain impulse to add more. more. more. Fill every single blank space with color#or a little drawing or a sticker or something. I take away 500 things and there are still a million there. Even when I thik I'm being#'simplistic' I'm still usually being 2x more complicated and cluttered than the standard or whatever lol. I guess thats clear from my#outfits/costumes though too. Like whatever that saying is from that person about something like 'before you leave the house take off one#more accessory. you dont need it' for me is like.. 'before you leave the house. add 10 more accessories. and 6 more layers. and another'#AAANyway. I wonder if also maybe some people would try to plan theirs in a way to look good or something or like.. plot things on the page#before placing them. I did sometimes have a theme for a day kind of (like day 10 I ended up finding a few gold and green things and then#was like.. hey... what if I looked for a few other things and only used these colors today') but aside from that I was just slapping down#stickers randomly and working around them to fill the page. Maybe a lot of neat minimalistic asthetic design is about planning and#having a Vision set ahead of time. instead of just complete random whatever. doodling whilst watching youtube videos or eating lunch. It's#a miracle actually I've managed to not spill any food on the book the whole time. anyway.. I do wish the highlighter really showed up. the#scanner kind of makes the colors look VERY different to irl. But also it got much clearer images than just camera pictures of pages. alas..#..Still oddly enjoy the phrase 'Salisbury Steak gently kissed with industrial pollutants'#probably my favorite section of 'gluing random papers and things onto the page' lol#Also I wonder if it's super obvious that I literally never ever use references when I draw (save for the few freakish looking youtube#face sketches) since everyone is always in the same positions and looking very similar ghhb. This could have been a good opportunity to#work on not solely drawing from my mind and try to do more Dynamic Experimental scribbles. NO. Same exact eye for the 90th time#be upon ye. But I guess it was meant to be casual 'daily doodles'. True 'practice' would make it seem too effortful like a full project. hm#(lol the one decimated pencil in the set... never hand me a writing utensil. i will passively destroy it somehow. shaving the sides of a#pencil off with a knife or snapping a pen in half as a nervous fidget without even realizing i've done it. sorry to the drawing implements)
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My designs for Marx and Magolor. Sorry they're stupidly simple but this is probably the best I could come up with that has both as many features they have from their canon versions, and "realism". Will probably change in the future but most likely not because I know myself and I'm lazy
#magolor has magic hands and no legs. i wanted to go for smth realistic but this is kirby & he has magic hands and levitates so why the fuck#not. i also wanted to make his robe smaller but idk if thatd be weird? plus i feel like he'd want to sell the illusion that hes tall anyway#and for marx. i initially was gonna give him a white shirt like everyone else who draws him but#i wanted to make his outfit easy to put on since he doesnt have arms. and when i was looking at jester outfits. they seem pretty easy to pu#on in general so hey it works. the only thing is his shoes but they have straps but maybe he can shimmey his feet to put them on#either that or theyre for decoration and he can slip the shoes on#kirby#magolor#marx#kirby marx#kirby magolor#magolor gijinka#marx gijinka#munch art#my sketches#munch sketches
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every day i wish there had been a better solution for the qin su marriage problem.
in my fix-it fics i either have some other sect leader claim that he was actually madly in love with her this whole time and sweep her away for jgy's sake, have her mom confess earlier, make jgy decide to tell her for her own good and have them work together, or not give them a chance to meet and fall in love in the first place (i guess i could also make qin su have a miscarriage, but that's really sad and awful and not my preferred option at all), but all of those require tweaks to the circumstances, sometimes early on so they don't meet or jgy feels safe enough to talk with her or another confidant, or sometimes later like madam qin finding out they're pregnant before the marriage prep is too far along and telling one or both of them right away so they can make other arrangements.
with the situation being what it was, jgy didn't find out soon enough to do anything that wouldn't involve either marrying her anyway (and he didn't think telling her about it would do anything except make her upset and depressed) or leaving her essentially a ruined woman with no prospects and an illegitimate child who would inevitably grow up fatherless, which is pretty much exactly what his dad did to meng shi. this would be a crueler option than pretty much anything else, and given that he clearly still cares about her, he couldn't do that in good conscience. jgy tries his best to protect the people he loves, unless there is literally no other way for him to survive.
it's one more example of jgy being faced with a situation where the only choices are bad ones, and making the decision that he thinks will hurt the fewest number of people. metatextually, it's one more example of women in fiction being shoved aside and not given agency in their own lives, and getting killed off instead of surviving and growing as people like the male characters are allowed to do. it's just a tragic situation all around and i wish there had been something they could have done.
#the untamed#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#cql#chen qing ling#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#jin guangyao#qin su#mxtx#mo xiang tong xiu#yunmeng bee posts#this encapsulates the tragedy of jgy's life in a lot of ways imo#there's also the aspect of jin rusong - jgy believes there's a chance of him being born disabled in a way that would suggest incest#which would spell disaster for not only him‚ but also qin su and rusong himself#the few academic articles i was able to access (aka not behind a paywall) suggest that the penalty for incest in ancient china +#+ was public execution of both parties! jgy emphatically does not want that to happen to either himself or qin su!#now i don't know how likely it would be for jrs to have some kind of condition that would make people suspicious#(i've done some research on it bc i was curious‚ but it was either vague‚ behind a paywall‚ or too technical for me to understand haha)#but jgy is (justifiably!!) paranoid. people are already gossiping and speculating about him - this would ruin him‚ his wife‚ his child‚#and possibly his friends too#whether you believe he killed his son or not‚ you have to admit that letting qs carry him to term was an incredibly risky decision#and i think it was because he loved her. he wanted her to have the child she wanted.#if she couldn't have a husband who couldn't be around her without fear & distress‚ she would at least have her son. he wanted that for her.#it would have been so easy for him to slip her an abortifacient‚ or to smother the baby while he slept or give him poison#and blame it on the kid being fragile/the high death rate in children. i don't think they knew what sids was but sometimes babies just die#because he didn't kill rusong in utero or when he was a newborn‚ i find it unlikely that he arranged rusong's death years later#but everyone can have their own opinion on that i guess#again... if jgy was as awful as people seem to believe he is‚ he'd have just murdered his way out easily and survived the book!#his love is his downfall!!!
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“I had a dream, though,” I say, thinking back. “I was following a mockingjay through the woods. For a long time. It was Rue, really. I mean, when it sang, it had her voice.” “Where did she take you?” he says, brushing my hair off my forehead. “I don’t know. We never arrived.” I say. “But I felt happy.” ... Peeta pulls the chain with the gold disk from around his neck. He holds it in the moonlight so I can clearly see the mockingjay. Then his thumb slides along a catch I didn’t notice before and the disc pops open. It’s not solid, as I had thought, but a locket. And within the locket are photos. […] “Your family needs you, Katniss,” Peeta says. My family. My mother. My sister. And my pretend cousin Gale. But Peeta’s intention is clear. That Gale really is my family, or will be one day, if I live. That I’ll marry him. So Peeta’s giving me his life and Gale at the same time. To let me know I shouldn’t ever have doubts about it. Everything. That’s what Peeta wants me to take from him. ... He puts the chain with the locket around my neck, then rests his hand over the spot where our baby would be. “You’re going to make a great mother, you know,” he says. ... As I drift off, I try to imagine that world, somewhere in the future, with no Games, no Captiol. A place like the meadow in the song I sang to Rue as she died. Where Peeta’s child could be safe. ....
#the hunger games#everlark#eablog gifs#eablog quotes#i always wondered why they didn't make peetas locket have the mockingay like it does in the book#and the design doesnt have any real significance which is frustrating#it vaguely looks like wheat or i thought for a while it was meant to look like the stained glass in the victors village houses#but it doesnt#putting the mockingjay on it does mean something symbolically though#like hes trying to give her the future he thinks she wants and that the rebellion might bring#but ends up also giving her the pearl which she actually cherishes#kind of by accident just because hes thoughtful which is part of why she loves him#its such a good parallel and would have been an easy visual to carry through so weird that they just didnt? for no real apparent reason?#ALSO HE WANTED TO MATCH HER WHICH IS JUST#theyre a teammm#AND the mockingjay means something different for katniss than everyone thinks#and peeta is one of the only people that seems to understand that?#for her it symbolizes family ties not the rebellion#AND HE PUTS IT ON A LOCKET WITH HER FAMILY IN IT#but she really wants to have a family with him not gale so the mockingjay still does symbolize the future and their family#so him giving it to her is significant but not in the way he thinks#AND its like hes reclaiming the mockingjay for her again in some small way when everyone is taking it for themselves and using it#i actually cannot with them
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you know, all jokes aside(because we are guilty of making jokes too), it's really funny when people and the game make short jokes at Don's expense and it gives you the impression that she's absolutely microscopic, and then you look at the wiki or something and it's like. she's just 5'4"- she's actually like average height- she's just on a bus full of people who are freakishly tall. like Rodion is 6'0" and Meursault is 6'2". as fun as it is to make five foot jokes at Don's expense(and by extension Sinclair's, they're the same height), she is not that short and it is really easy to forget that. are we going to stop making them? probably not, but we gotta humble ourselves occasionally by reminding ourselves that we're only 3 inches taller than Don, if even that asdflkjn
#Faye Rambles#Limbus Company#like we have multiple friends shorter than don and it's so easy to forget. that she is not that short asdlfkjn#the perception of don makes her seem like 5 foot nothing or shorter#no she's actually perfectly average height for an adult woman asdflkjn#and she *might* be slightly above average for a spanish woman; unsure on that front asdflkjn#the short jokes are funny but also everyone else is just tall.#we guarantee; if you were in don's place; you'd be getting the short jokes#because everyone on that bus is a fucking basketball player asdflkjn
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*starting to write the Gid parents fic* how the fuck am I gonna write Yona, they’re all so inconsistent— *realizes that Yona is basically how the media sees Texas* oh. Wait, this is gonna be easy then
#at first I thought it was weird that there has been a character from Yona in every single campaign I have seen thus far#and that they can’t seem to decide between desert and lush farmland#before i actually thought about each description of Yona we have gotten from each of those characters#and how they almost perfectly replicate how the media can’t seem to decide if Texas is either a desert or a lush Greenland#so I have realized that Yona is basically Avantris’ version of Texas#which would also explain everyone’s accents#bc even tho my accent is more akin to Kremy’s i have family members whose accents replicate Gideon’s#for the record if it ain’t obvious im from Texas. and so is the majority of the family I know about#which yes is also the reason why I have such an easy time writing Kremy and Gideons accents#legends of avantris#once upon a witchlight#ouaw#gideon coal#I’m just unsure what part of Yona Gid is from#since the background of his part in the intro has the desert#but also im pretty sure he was raised on a farm so#so i think i might just have to base his location off of the farm my dads family lived at for a while#which was a mix of the two I’d say
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people acting as if laios can Do No Wrong and infantilizing him because he is autistic are annoying as hell. especially because laios belongs to my favorite genre of character: "person who desperately wants friends and deep relationships because they're lonely, and while part of their problems stem from people not wanting to understand them and refusing to meet them where they are, they also genuinely come across in a way where you Completely Understand why others can get turned off from them"
#.txt#dungeon meshi#laios#like. okay. i think its a very autistic experience to Want People In Your Life So Badly but because you act differently and have a hard time#with social cues you dont get that easy friendship and it sucks and youre lonely as hell#<- source: im autistic#but ALSO. i think some people forget that missing social cues genuinely makes you rude. even if you dont mean it#intent goes a long way but sometimes the autistic experience is realizing that Unfortunately You May Have Been A Dick#or that being intense or overbearing or disregarding boundries you dont know are there Drives People Away#like idk i think wanting people to look deeper and see whats worthwhile about you while also realizing youve unintentionally#driven people away#and that you can be misunderstood AND need to improve how you treat people#is an interesting story (growing as a person while also understanding that you were worthwhile the whole time even if others didnt see it)#on TOP of being a. idk more true to life autism expereince at least for me#and characters who have these kinds of arcs are really fascinating to me and i think theres a lot of nuance to them#and idk it sucks when people try to act as if lack of malicious intent suddenly means everyone who doesnt love you unconditionally is wrong#to be clear sometimes its not the Neurodivergentisms that drive ppl away sometimes its smth else#but idk i find more nuanced approaches to characters like this feel much more engaging to me and its lame when it seems like ppl go out#of their way to remove nuance from characters :/
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hate when i see a youtube video that's like 'analyzing why [thing] is bad!' and you watch the video and they just say nothing for twenty minutes
#random thoughts#watched a video on why a specific character was poor representation for survivors of assault#and it was such a nothing burger of a video#'this character is bad because children might see them and think their behavior is okay' okay?#i learned how to block out memories from finn adventure time but that doesn't mean memory suppression shouldn't be addressed in media#plus hazbin hotel. i'm talking about angel dust btw if that wasn't blaringly obvious. is an adult cartoon. for adults#adult cartoons shouldn't have to restrict their subject matter because kids could see it#and angel dust being a male queer SA victim using hypersexuality as a coping mechanism could be good!#and the fact he hits on other people despite it making them uncomfortable isn't exactly a problem a la his character?#it could be a control thing. i used to do something similar (pushing other people's boundaries and complaining when they pushed back)#because it made me feel some kind of control over my life#it could start off as a really shitty joke and then grow into 'oh god is that why he does that??'#but anyway their second main point was that the songs were bad? and that poison being an upbeat song makes it bad#like despite listing many other songs which are upbeat with heavy lyrics. but somehow poison is the exception because it's a cartoon?#like again that could be a character thing. angel dust using obfuscation as a coping mechanism to distract himself from his shitty life.#。・゚゚・the lyrics are upbeat to distract you from how dead i feel inside・゚゚・。#and their reading of the second song seemed really mean-spirited?#like as 'everyone has problems so you're not special because you're a whiny baby' rather than 'you're not as alone as you think you are'#and like if op wanted to just complain about a show they watched then yeah go off i do that all the time#but don't parade it as character analysis???#and they say 'oh reading it as a feelgood you're not alone message doesn't work because these characters' struggles are not equal'#but like. sometimes rape needs to feel like it's not some special trauma. it's not unique and you're not uniquely fucked up for it#two characters' traumas don't need to be directly comparable for them to bond!!!#and im not like. defending hazbin hotel btw. never seen it not going to see it no thanks#i'm just complaining about a mediocre youtube video that i'm going to forget about in a week#god i hate that brand of youtube video. where they just complain about things without going into depth about why they're bad#especially if their complaints are shallow and don't have to do with like. the actual structure of a character or story#like it's so easy to say 'this character is bad because theyre a predatory stereotype' but like. go into some depth at least#i think i hate these videos so much because they're fueled purely by hate. no love for the source material or even a desire to learn#or a love for storytelling even
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compilation of all canon/canon-ish/“technically jokes but something similar would happen in canon” (though this only applies to 1 box here) teammateswap textboxes for your viewing pleasure :
(this is going to be long so uhh….anyways : about teammateswap)
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#zomb’s dialogue boxes#teammateswap - dr au#I PROMISE THERE’S CANON TEXTBOXES THEY’RE ALL NOT JOKES I PROMISE….#anyways i’m putting these in the main tags hiiiiiii ^^ hi guys!!!! hi hi hi hi hi :-3c#deltarune au#deltarune susie#susie deltarune#deltarune noelle#noelle deltarune#noelle holiday#deltarune berdly#berdly deltarune#deltarune ralsei#ralsei deltarune#tbh looking at these without knowing susie’s history of cringefail lesbianism makes it seem like she’s not into noelle at all which is…#obviously not true#have you seen her?!?!????#it’s just not that hard to make her blush…it’s so easy everyone has done it at some point probably
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Oh, wait, wait, ok, I can tell tumblr my news now.
I was accepted into the JET Program and will be moving to Japan for one year starting in late summer to teach English. : )
I don't know how many other applicants have ever had either of my specific application 'angles'. I think they were both pretty weird, but also very, very me, and I'm pleasantly surprised that they seemed to have worked, going off both by the acceptance and the very positive and warm reactions I got during the interview I had. These were:
Science/scicomm/museum background + implying mutual interest in and love of like insects and sea life could be an avenue of intercultural connection and exchange
India and Japan have always struck me as weirdly similar in ways nobody seems to discuss, especially in both being simultaneously hurtling into modernity and deeply traditional/conservative in many ways and places
So. Is this a silly idea considering most people in this program are fresh college grads, and people my age are expected to maybe be getting more settled rather than hopping continents? Is this a scary idea, considering I'll have to uproot all my shit and go exist in a foreign country whose language I really don't know beyond miniscule smatterings? I mean, hmm, yes on both counts, but I'm very excited. On count one, I'd only get older in the future and demonstrably *don't* already have a settled life and career here to disrupt (lol), and on count two...guys, I'm so so tired of letting fear and inertia make my life decisions.
Time to pack up and store most of my shit and end my lease and. Yeah. Also I haven't actually been to India in five years and will probably try to visit my relatives there in the coming months since idk if i'd had an opportunity for a prolonged visit in the future during the one year (at least) in jp. I'll also be probably selling, trading, or giving away a lot more of my hobby shit (that was sort of an ongoing project already but since I'll be unable to use most of it for a year plus it's another reason to do so), so uh, if you've ever wished I would sell any of my dolls now might be time to commit BJD Hobby Taboo and ask me lol. And, obviously, I'll be studying more Japanese, because mine is incredibly へたくそ at the moment. So much to do. But I'm really excited. And thank you to all of y'all that have been encouraging to me about anything related to this matter <3
#i don't know where they'll put me but i asked for ibaraki prefecture#during my research i became really endeared by the idea of The Prefecture Everyone Thinks is Ugly and Boring lol#seems like a good combo of 'not too far from urban things + cost of living + genuinely there ARE nice natural and cultural things there'#they could put me anywhere though lol#already one of my fandom friends from there wants to meet up ;; im so flattered#im obviously not going there to do doll and fandom bullshit but that stuff will be a nice bonus in off time#i have very little idea on what to expect specifically re japanese attitudes to south asian people and am interested to find out#and maybe be a bunch of kids' first exposure to both americans and south asians and like immigrants as a concept : 3#keeping my expectations tempered though. It Could Suck#but it'll suck in a novel way and truly i thrive on novelty even though often i take the easy and familiar path to try to protect myself#just. aaAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaa scary but exciting im so excited
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Thank you as always for your wonderful art. Good luck with midterms and your classes!
of course, thank you for the good wishes !!! i can't wait until i can find more time to draw though: its painful having so much i want to draw but needing to be """"responsible"""" or whatever and waiting...
honestly i always thought i was a part of . Sizable fandoms and that i just had niche favorites, but the actual. AMOUNT of wonderful art and fics and discussions when it comes to cherik is amlost overwhelming i wanna throw up <- this is a good thing
#snap chats#i guess that's what'll happen when you get into a franchise over six decades old but anyways#no cause when id draw for my other fandoms sometimes i feel like. i was atlus ?? if that makes sense and as not-egotistical as possible ??#like it was very easy for me to overtake tags thats how much id draw in comparison to the amount other people'd post#WHICH SOUNDS SO EGOTISTICAL BUT ITS LIKE. IT WAS TRUE thats what id be told anyhow .... id get titles an shit for it#i never check fandom tags i get scared to do that BUT IN ANY CASE. thank you all for being so lovely :)#it is very jarring though because im not used to this kind of attention- maybe after a year or two but not two months jvA:JVKLJ#im happy tho im very grateful thank you all again for enjoying my art and for chatting with me !!!#i look forward to making more art and talking with you all down the line if you'll have me ^^#for now ... dinner time ... is 5PM dinner to you guys ? thats like. Evil Lunch#not dinner but too late for lunch... my childhood neighrs used to eat dinner at 6 tho so idk dinnertime always seemed like 8 to me#im rambling. anyways. thank you again everyone i look forward to chatting with you all soon !#i have a few more messages in my inbox .. something im not used to veajlkjea again the attention is very whiplash inducing- but welcomed !!
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Coda and Ichor! (Catacombtale Style!)
These two don't have a *ton* of interaction in the Main story, but since Ichor and Balance are the only two characters I've fully designed, Coda gets stuck next to him, haha!
BONUS art jumpscare:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1414bc391824a2fc5b985a42e845e906/a8aafd5418f82fcb-8f/s540x810/135d5dde5ad50198dad335b10634466fefc7fc4a.jpg)
These two actually exist in another project I'm working on too called Codex, which is basically just removing the UT aspects of Catacombtale and doing a lot more worldbuilding and character design!
Coda is older in Codex and is marked by an old God (which should get him jailed or killed, as it means for everyone else) but he hides it for years and years before he finally flees the complex he's living in to go confront the gods and stop their destructive path. Meanwhile Ichor is much the same, only he's much more ready and willing to help Coda without much prompting. Here he's also sort of a Koi Fish! (His brother is a Betta Fish)
#utmv#utmv sans#utmv oc#my art#spot!drawn#utmv art#Catacombtale#Ichor Sans#Coda#ichor#Ichor is so funny to me because his Brother (Reward) uses puzzles and then a final battle as his “Challenge” but Ichor?#his Challenge is to tell him the best Pun you know. He is the God of Puns after all!#(I think he hides his true nature as God of Punishment from the player as long as possible. saying his bro is so cool for being a major god)#Coda is a human with a lot of integrity and stubborn morals. even Determination can't escape the Gods wrath. but integrity?#Gods have a code to respect a soul who follows their own nature and still co-exists despite it just like themselves#so Coda is primed to help out.#his sister is about 7 abd she's a soul of Bravery#which means Hearth (who watches over her as a safe-space from the eyes of the other gods) has his hands full#trying to keep her from charging after Coda#Coda is so funny because he'll just walk in sonewhere and start a “Nuh-uh” contest with any given god and like... usually ends up winning???#and usually the Challenges are more gentle because he's still a young mortal. hardly a Hero. certainly not the one of prophecy#everyone figures Asgore or Undyne will kill them but uhhh. yeah. no that doesn't happen.#There's a lot of Lore here but like...#one additional thing is that in the story Coda manages to spend enough time with Ichor to obtain an item#“Sans' Protection Charm.” /Ichor gave it to you. Says to keep hold of it when facing danger. It seems like an old keepsake./#that charm is one that Ichor carved years and years ago and he only gives out charms to mortals he cares for#not only has the underground seen his rage boil (even while chained) but they have also seen his sorrow. no one wants to be the one to kill#the mortal he has deemed harmless. some fear he might have another outburst. others worry he'd fall down.#it has no real stat changes but when Coda equips it? it's like turning on Easy Mode for Godly Challenges
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everyone on earth probably has a hypothetical farming sim in their mind's eye that they daydream about on occasion because of the unfortunate situation that despite there being like a thousand farming games released every minute only like 4 of them are any good. and i think this is fun, i think its good to keep the imagination alive. if i made a farming sim i would bring back rival marriages from the old friends of mineral town. i want to steal someones wife.
#jk jk you dont steal anyones wife or husband. but it wasnt a popular feature because people felt like they were stealing someones spouse#plus the fact that characters married eachother after a certain amount of time made them unavailable for player marriage adding a timelimit#if the player wants to get married. but thats why i want it BACK i think its 1) hilarious and 2) interesting and makes the world feel alive#NOW part of the reason (outside of it being an unpopular feature to begin with) its not in like any modern games is probably because#devs don't know how to deal with non-gender-locked marriage candidates with this#i think its easy. everyone is bisexual. not just playersexual. textually bisexual#it'll be interesting if they always have a set pairup regardless of player gender but it could also be interesting if there was like#a little algorithm to give a couple non-player pairups as options. maybe make it random#or if a dev was tooooo ambitious they could add a matchmaking system that the player could be involved with if they wanted to play cupid LO#but that seems too much for a farming game. thats usually a whole other game in itself#but yeah i think its easy. its not like farming sim marriage candidates are all that deep characters to begin with#i think itd be fine if you had a couple randomized rival marriages...... i think itd be neat#my other farming sim daydream is NO fucking combat for the love of god FREE ME from combat#that is why i like story of seasons just a bit more than stardew#stardew has so much good farming mechanics but god i hate the mines. i think its so soso sososososososo boring#i also dont really like the turn based battles in atelier games and most atelierlikes either#(well i liked it in mana khemia but that was more turn based focused than alchemy focused)#i came here to farm. i came here to make potions. i came here to micromanage numbers. do not make me battle#but that is purely a personal preference thing LOL a lot of people really love farming game combat. i dont tho <3#MY DAYDREAM FARMING SIM HAS NO COMBAT... AND YES CUCKHOLDRY#(jk jk thats not what rival marriages are. but thats how people talk about them. which is fascinating)#(unfortunately it makes me laugh so thats why i keep making jokes about it. sowwy <3 )
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