#everyone else already knows theres no reason to go HI IM THE DOCTOR HERE TO HELP

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

has he even NAMED himself? i dont think he has? he keeps ditching his coat

[larynxnymphh]

tw vent

i’ve been trying so hard. theres too much to explain to you all but but he said something that broke me. its not his fault, he doesn’t know. im literally in tears typing this cause when the only person that can comfort me is mad at me, who am i supposed to talk to???

my older brother, my closest friend, was the only person i had from 11-13. he was already dead to everyone else when i met him but he was alive for me. the doctors thought i was crazy, they still do. and i know that nobody else is going to understand what him and i shared. he knew everything and he helped me. we did everything together and we shared a song even. he promised he would always be here for me. promised.

he left me one day. never came back. i still have his photo with me and i cry and i beg for him almost every night to come back. and its not just him, everyone that swore they would never hurt me or leave me has done nothing but that. my family, my friends, my exes.

do i know what it feels like? yeah. i do.

i would never leave him like that. it hurts me every day, it tears me apart. i just thought he would understand what i said but he didn’t and suddenly im that kid again talking to doctors and adults and nobody understands me. no matter how hard i try to explain im terrified that they’ll never get it.

i say something good, they think its bad. i say something sad, they get angry at me.

i say nothing, and i hate myself. but everyones happy when i say nothing.

i love him so much but sometimes i feel like im stupid and im not even speaking coherent sentences.

i said i wouldn’t be a live long enough for something to happen.

i explained he’s my reason to live and that i wouldn’t live long without him.

but,

thats not okay to say.

so why bother saying anything at all.

[reidsnose]

love letters

overview: spencer has a wonderful idea after finding out that reader had never gone to her senior prom

genre: fluff fluff fluff

a/n: i mixed two ideas that have been sitting in my notes app for this lol but i think its sweet!! i wrote it a little rushed and definitely not bc im not getting a prom this year due to miss rona👀 LMAO but as always please lmk what yall think ab it :)

masterlist

-

the idea had fully occupied his thoughts the second after the words left your mouth.

it was "the buttcrack of dawn" as you had called it, though spirits were high on the late jet ride home. it was a rare but much needed positive end to the case, and everyone was happily chatting with each other. since the case was involving high schoolers, the subject fell on prom. everyone went around sharing their prom stories one by one, recalling awful dresses and questionable dates til the questions turned to spencer.

"what ab you, pretty boy, what was your prom like?" morgan asked, still smiling widely from recalling his own.

you watched spencer shift uncomfortably for a second.

"i uh..i never went to prom." he stammered, a tight lipped smile on his face.

"no! you just dont wanna tell us!" prentiss cried, throwing her hands in the air.

"i graduated high school when i was 12! why would i have gone to prom?" he reasoned.

"you had to have gone when you were older or something! everyone has!" jj countered.

"thats not true, i never went to prom either," you defended, subconsciously inching closer to spencer.

before anyone could even ask you to explain why, spencer got the idea. he mentally left the conversation after you gave your answer. he spent the whole rest of the ride home and the next couple of weeks brain storming and planning.

and casually after work one day, as he was walking you to your car, he asked you if you wanted to hang out with him that weekend; at his house.

you and Spencer had hung out before, but mostly at your house or at coffee shops; he didn't invite people over very often.

of course you agreed but you grew confused when he told you to dress fancy.

you raced home afterwards to raid your closet, looking for any fancy dresses you may have stuffed in there.

spencer spent the whole day preparing his apartment. he put up streamers and balloons. he made a playlist of all your favorite songs. and then he rushed to get his clothes from the cleaners.

and when you knocked at his door the breath that left your lungs struggled to come back after he opened the door.

he stood in a gorgeous suit, different than he had ever worn to work. he rubbed the back of his neck and gestured to the living room, revealing the adorable (albeit poorly made but its the thought that counts) decorations.

"um.. welcome to prom," he said, turning back to you, revealing a blushy smile.

he tried not to stare too much at you, but it was difficult. your eyes sparkled as you stepped inside and looked around. and the dress you were wearing fit you so gorgeously he truly couldnt take his eyes off of you.

"spencer, i..." you trailed off, enchanted by what he had done.

"sorry if it looks bad. or if you think its weird that i did this. i just thought cause neither of us went to prom maybe you wanted to have a little one with me? yeah now that i say it out loud maybe you hate it im sorr-" he rambled behind you.

you turned quickly to him as he got lost in his words, eyes glued to the floor. cutting him off by wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him as tight as you could. you could feel the tension leave his body as he melted into the embrace, returning it gladly. he doesn't like to be touched by anyone really, except for you.

"i love it. thank you," you whispered, giving him one last squeeze before letting go.

he has a spread of snacks lying out on the coffee table which he has mooved to the corner of the room to make space for a makeshift dancefloor.

he turns on the music and you two start talking and dancing and laughing. two fools with four left feet completely and obliviously in love. well, oblivious the the other anyway.

a slower song came on, an old one that you had wanted to slow dance to ever since you were a little girl. and somehow naturally you two came together, his hand dropped to your waist, the other delicately cradling your own. your other hand found its way up to his shoulder, feeling as though a magnet was pulling you two closer. and closer.

he looked absolutely stunning. the soft lights he had strung around the apartment sparkled like stars in his eyes; its was...dizzying, in the most incredible way.

unbeknownst to you, as you stared at the stars in his eyes he was looking at his whole world that he had been somehow lucky enough to hold in his arms.

he held his arm out, allowing you to spin and when he pulled you back both of your arms ended up wrapped around his neck, and his around your waist. you were less dancing now and more...hugging. with your head pressed to his chest, he hoped with all his might that you wouldn't be able to hear his hammering heart. you most definitely could, but it was calming to know he was as nervous as you were. you smiled, listening more to his heart than the music he had played for you.

you were both sure that you could burst from pure bliss. the song ended a little too quickly for either of your liking and reluctantly you let go of each other. and suddenly Spencer was hit with the realization that he forgot something.

"oh my gosh," his eyes widened as he looked around the room.

"what?" you asked, mirroring him and looking as well.

"i can't remember where i left your corsage! i was gonna give it to you at the door but i forgot!" he exclaimed, running around the room checking shelves.

you smiled to yourself. he got you a corsage!

"ill help you look" you decided.

"please do," he chuckled.

"i thought you had an eidetic memory, shouldn't you know where you left it?" you joked, shooting him a smug smile.

"y/n, my brain was all jumbled to day and it wasn't just from being around you," he realized what he had said and quickly turned back to the shelf he was looking at, "could you check in my room please?"

his heart was racing at his own stupidity; how could he just say that so nonchalantly? he had been planning to tell you that he liked you for the longest time he cant afford slipping up and having it be anything less than perfect.

you slipped into his room, your cheeks warm from the idea that you make his big brain all jumbled. he probably didn't mean it like that, you were just looking too much into it.

you sighed as you crouched to look under his bed for it. you found a small wooden box that you slid out from underneath. it had your name on it.

is it normal to keep a corsage in a wooden box? you wouldn't know, you never went to prom.

you shrugged your shoulders, "i found it spence!"

with out thinking you opened the box, except instead of a band of flowers you were greeted with letters, all addressed to you. there were annotations written in the margins with purple ink. you furrowed your eyebrows as you scanned the various letters.

dear y/n,

today you complimented my glasses and my heart skipped a beat. thats dumb spencer dont start like that

dear y/n,

im in love with you. too forward

dear y/n,

you make life worth living. shes gonna think youre a creep

you felt a rush of euphoria fill your chest. did he really feel these things for you? your thoughts swirled in the most wonderful way. a wide smile broke across your face, butterflies running rampage through your stomach as you reread his words. his words addressed to you.

"oh thank God i really thought i lost-oh. oh no." spencer started as he walked through the door of his room immediately walking back out. you followed, blinking your watery eyes at him. "i can explain.

"i think youve explained enough, theres like 20 letters in here!" you chuckled, flipping through them.

"i didnt know how to tell you and i dont want to ruin what we already have and i-"

"it wasnt too forward." you stated, grabbing one of the letters.

"what?" he asked, dumbfounded.

"in this one," you held up the letter, "you wrote dear y/n, im in love with you. and then you crossed it out and wrote that it was too forward but i dont think it was."

"youre not mad?"

"mad? spencer ive been trying to admit the fact that im in love with you since i realized it myself, why would i be mad?"

"youre..you feel the same way?" he looked back up at you, a hesitant smile pulling on the corners of his lips.

"more so," you beamed, stepping closer.

he wrapped his arms around you, "thats good or else the rest of this prom would have sucked."

you chuckled, pulling him impossibly closer to you as another perfect song played.

-

-

ultra mega super cool taglist

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos @sonnydoesrandomshit @averyhotchner @laurakirsten0502 @reidyoulikeabook @rem-ariiana @spencerreid9 @vampire-overlord @takeyourleap-of-faith @spenxerslut @violetspoetic @aperrywilliams @b-a-utiful @eevee0722 @srhxpci @reidemandweep @imdefinitelyfloating @random-human-person @gurkiloni @luvspence @calm-and-doctor @ssavanessa22 @singularityjc @sydnee-kom-spacekru @sydneekomspacekru

[blookmallow]

playing rusty lake Roots... theres so much going on 

i wrote this post at like 2 AM last night so its kind of incoherent lmao

ok so now im following the family history of... maybe the founders of the rusty lake hotel? someone who is Involved Somehow. some weird shit is going on and im really into it but not quite following yet 

oH god theres a dead guy in the clock. ok 

i spent like 10 minutes solving puzzles in this room with that dude in there the whole time and i had no idea OK SURE 

then i had to burrow into his chest to steal his heart, as you do. sorry sir apparently i need it for some reason but it doesnt look like you’re using it anymore anyway 

very romantic

the absolutely batshit solutions to some of these are so good like. “she likes him! he likes her! help them communicate” “ok i will... give her a rose” “she likes the rose! oh she pricked herself and is bleeding everywhere now” “i... use her blood. for ink. with the feather i got from a raven earlier. so he can write her a love note. with her blood” “great job! they’re engaged now” “i see” 

and you’ll NEVER GUESS where i found a ring for her 

god damn it its you again

why is this disembodied hand following me everywhere i go... i didnt kill it this time it was already dead but like, Why 

oh fuck its the dudes!!!! from the hotel!!!! its the guys!!!! 

i can also see them in the hotel across the lake despite everyone else being humans this time and it feels like this should be Before the events of the, uh. dinner party. but it might be shadows of the future to come or something, there’s a lot of ominous Fate and something to do with memories happening here 

oh. that’s why i needed the heart. i see 

im collecting sacrifices for some kind of revival i think, im betting this is gonna end up being how mr. owl happened somehow 

oH god that’s. ok. fuckign christ 

thats not. how any of this works but sure ok that happened 

really not a fan of the fact that the solution to “how do i get the key from the dog” ended up being “feed it the woman’s fucking placenta after she gives birth” lmao ok

i do like when the solutions are like. unexpectedly horrifying, though. that moment of “wait. no. no. oh god. thats it isnt it” 

also the woman would only give me one bottle of milk (there’s three babies) so i had to fill another one with wine and another with water. i feel like this is a bad method of caring for your triplets but what do i kno 

i know this all isnt really meant to be taken literally tho i think... everything happening here is highly symbolic but im not sure exactly how

the milk goes to samuel, who seems the most normal/put together child, maybe the one who was treated the best/the most privileged one/the one closest to the mother 

the wine goes to albert who ends up being the most fucked up one so maybe thats a sign he was abused/maybe one or both parents had an alcohol problem they took out on him the most 

im not sure what the water would mean though, that one goes to emma and shes a botanist so, water for the flowers, i guess, she later commits suicide but i dont know why yet (or maybe it might not be explained at all) maybe it’s a. wasting away/neglected thing? 

hm.

im missing a shot i thought i had here but you’re in an alchemy lab trying to make this elixir and the alchemist won’t take it, and the only other thing in the room is.... the dog 

so i was just like :( im gonna kill the dog arent i 

but then 

the dog drank the elixir and was fine so the alchemist tried it and immediately died, so apparently it’s a 50/50 chance of either reaction and not “it works or it doesn’t” all around and now we have an immortal dog :’  ) 

either that or it just doesn’t affect dogs. time will tell i suppose

anyway this is how albert turned out and i would do anything for him LOOK at this baby boy 

he wanted a butterfly so i solved a bunch of very strange puzzles to obtain one for him 

fuCKing hell 

albert you’re not gonna believe this look what i found

FUCK yeah you look great 

i brought him the butterfly and he immediately stabbed it to death but really im more concerned with the fact that it’s BLEEDING RED 

look at him go

i carved a pumpkin mask for him and he loves it 

i hope albert knows i would die for him 

ok anyway uhh its 2 AM as of when im writing this so i should stop but im trying to work out thoughts on what the fuck is going on here so far 

ok so

james married mary and they had three kids

james might have murdered his uncle or something im still not sure why there was a dead guy in the clock at the beginning 

somethin sure happened there

james became fascinated with alchemy and eventually died trying to create an elixir of life. something or someone is trying to do some kind of weird revival ritual with body parts. i highly suspect that might be where mr. owl comes from

its not totally clear what’s going on with albert, he had a mark on his head when he was a baby but im not sure if his face is like that just bc birth mark or if the wasp incident made it worse or something, i feel like it wasnt as visible in the childhood scene but i dont remember now 

he wanted the butterfly when he was a kid too but it wasnt clear if he liked it or wanted to kill it then too. not sure if the wasp incident Changed Him/was the start of lifelong rivalry with samuel, or if albert’s just mentally ill and that was just One More Incident with his siblings bullying him, or maybe a combination of both

emma grows up to be a botanist but commits suicide for reasons unknown

there was a really weird disjointed flashback on emma’s side of the tree where albert kind of inadvertently dumped a kid into a well (he was... spinning the crank thing mayb stimming or something, the player makes the swing go too far to make the kid land there in the first place so idk if thats just The Hand Of Fate or what, but albert didnt technically do it he just was the reason he lost grip on the. thing where the rope goes/he didnt help the kid) (but again he’s. not mentally well, i think it was ‘he didnt understand what was going on’ more than ‘he committed a possible murder’) so idk if maybe that was emma’s kid?? she also may have been impregnated by plants. dont know what the fuck that was about either 

samuel marries a fortune teller named ida (and has more kids i think. i wasnt paying close enough attention to the photo on the wall) who albert also loves but she seems to think of him as the devil and has visions about him i think

it looks like albert loses it and puts some kind of curse on samuel possibly black magic/voodoo/something which MAY have turned him into mr. crow, which, fucked up if true 

but im hesitant to accept “albert’s just Fucked Up And Evil” bc... the wine bottle seems to imply he was not treated well as a baby/possibly abused, samuel knocked a wasp nest onto his head which isn’t massively outside the realm of like. sibling rivalry stuff (my brother once smacked me in the head with a snowglobe so hard i had to be rushed to the doctor when he was rly little/i was younger and we’re Completely Fine now lmao) but maybe fucked him up worse than they realized 

and the whole thing with ida, too. theres no detail given but it definitely seems like samuel is the favorite child and albert is the “we don’t talk about that one” child so its like. years of abuse/unequal treatment/etc and we dont necessarily know how samuel’s treated him all these years or if there could’ve been more/worse things going on 

i dont know!! i like him and i want him to get help and not just be condemned as the family demon just bc he spooky 

[luked4nuke]

If, I were President of the United States. (I just wanna state I’m not a democrat or republican)

First I’d enforce Quarantine and extend it. I’d also attend the poorest families or individuals first and provide them with the financial assistance they need. People are struggling hard enough as it is living paycheck to paycheck.

Second I’d shut down the schools as I believe safty more important especially for the future kids who will rule this place. I also don’t like how schools give so much homework and stress. They just condition kids into beleiving working 40 hours a week is normal and that you should be lucky to have weekends. Staying in classes all day then returning home only to be forced to complete more homework that takes up time and robs them of social interactions. These schools don’t even test knowledge. They test obedience and reward them for being quiet little slaves that will slowly become a “regular worker.” They really don’t care about how smart you are, they test memory over all else, when they study a subject and pass the test they move on quickly to the next one stressing them out. If they failed the test, to bad they’re still moving on with you. (Sorry this got way of topic. I just hate how schools operate and also how low they pay the teachers)

Third I would dismantle the police force and create a new one. A better one that focuses on real problems like sex trafficking and drugs. All the horrible crimes that are allowed to fly under the radar. Any excessive use of force would be heavily punished. Fired, fined and jail time. No shooting at peaceful protesters, seriously dafaq is wrong with them unleashing hell upon unarmed civilians and sneaking in rioters to escalate it to justify the force.

Fourth, gold is a finite resource. Pretty much all the money you’ve ever spent is fake, all digital backed by nothing. Personally I hate it but you’ve all becomes achstomed to it so I would attempt to fix the economy so people can afford essential things, like homes and food. Instead of kicking out homeless people Id build shelters. They make it to easy to fall down into poverty and nearly impossible to climb back up. Once you’ve been arrested, once you’ve been homeless, you understand the struggle of trying to reintergrate with society. The easiest path become the dark one. I would attempt to control the population, America is a gigantic habitat and likewise it has a carrying capacity. If you’re gonna argue people have to pay unreasonable amounts of money for food you’re crazy.

Immigrants are definitely allowed as long as they follow the rules and don’t commit crimes. America was litterally founded on immigrants. American stole land from the natives violently and even managed to capture Hawaii, which was its own nation. They taxed us and recognized us as a small power. Iolani Palace has electricity flush toilets and even phones before the White House did. Queen Lili’uokalani signed in duress. It horrible and sheforfeited her whole kingdom in exchange for the people, as a leader should. The people make a country, the government already should put the people first. Without all the hardworking Americans working, there is no country.

We don’t serve the government. As a government worker we serve the people. It’s our duty to ensure everybody is treated fairly. To make sure everybody that we oversee has the essentials for life, a home and food.

And for LGBT rights. I personally don’t care what the heck they do. Love is love, let it be. They can chose to identify as whoever they want and pursue relationships with whoever. You can’t force things onto people. America is supposed to be freedom personified, we can chose to do as we please as long as we don’t bring harm to others. Those camps are wrong. America is also religion free, you can be whatever you want, Christian Muslim, litterally anything. Being a satanist is totally legal as long as you don’t hurt anything. Believe in what you want and don’t force it on others. Gay people are amazing! We all are, were all human and we can change and create change. We are all human at the core and we always have been. We have a right to love, and to be loved by all around us. Love is love, let it be, theres always been love. I can identify as a man or woman, and I can damn well love either as I please as long it’s reciprocated. I’d always rather say I love you too much then not enough.

Climate change is real. The pollution of those stupidly large companies is also VERY real. As an individual you contribute less than a percent of the actual pollution, it’s literally the big corporations. That needs to stop. I’m not exactly sure how but I AM GOING to start a wave of change that will benefit the worlds health. We all live here. This is not political, I don’t have time for games, scientists that have studied their whole lives are begging for us to change. We can all have solar electricity farms and then it’d be FREE. “But you can’t charge people for that you can’t make money.” I’m NOT TRYING TO MAKE MONEY I DO NOT CARE ANOUT MONEY. IM AIMING FOR SOMETHING BIGGER THAN GREED THE BETTERMENT OF HUMANITY. I don’t care about ruining electric companies and other random fossil fuels bullshits that will run out, I want the future to be bright!

Screw it im going off the rails, schools main courses should focus on stuff like self sustainment, like farming and wilderness survival. Creativity because that’s the most human thing about us! Empathy basic Psychology. Kids can get mad they should learn and understand why. Understand why they feel the feelings they feel and giving them all better emotional control. EMPATHY. They need to learn things like taxes since they’re such a big part. Also why the heck are taxes so complicated. It’s just targeting the illiterate foreigners and immigrants who struggle and try to understand it and I believe that’s horrible. Make it easier to become apart of America the land of freedom and the getaway from the crueler areas of earth. Maybe just limit the population. Also seriously fuck off with taxes! Why the hell are you charging and taxing 14 year olds that aren’t allowed to vote, thats taxation without representation.

Taxes should be like Mario kart and Ancient Greece. Quote from some thing I googled

“The philosopher Aristotle developed the theme. His "magnificent man" gave vast sums to the community. But poor men could never be "magnificent" because they did not have the financial means. True wealth consists in doing good, Aristotle argued in the Art of Rhetoric: in handing out money and gifts, and helping others to maintain an existence.

The idea is simple the higher up you are on the financial ladder the more you have to pay taxes and contribute to society. The large taxes from the rich help fund financial aid for the poor and stuff. The rich did not earn that money they climbed to top on top a mountain of millions of shortcuts and underpaid workers It should be an honor to be taxed and help the poor people survive. Like in Mario kart, the higher you’re placed the harder it is to maintain it and the last place people always get the better power ups giving them a constant fighting chance. At most I believe wealth should be hoarded to sustain like one generation of kids, two at the most. Maybe three but theres no reason anybody should have all that money that your never going to spend or all that money that becomes worthless once a war or breaks out or aliens attack or something. Life is more important than money. Something simple everyone should consider.

I think everybody should be able to pursue a career and each career should be sustainable. Enjoyment in a job of your choosing without worrying about financial burden. Jobs would be divided into smaller simple groups and the pay would based on their contribution to society. Like doctors getting paid more and getting teachers paid more, but small retailers wouldn’t get paid as much but they could survive not living paycheck to paycheck. The motivation is everybody should free to pursue the hobby they love without being punished. Maybe little Timmy doesn’t want to be a firefighter, maybe he desires a simple fun life selling flowers. That’s fine! Maybe they don’t wanna become the hero but it’ll be an honor to society. As long as you have a job that contributes to society you can live for free. If everybody is constantly trying to make the most profit, then we all become a bucket of crabs dragging each other down. I can’t sell my $10 good that costed me $2 to make. Also the whole buy back thing irritates me, I spent $60 on this goddamn game and GameStop can only give me like $10 in store credit or $5 in real life? That’s isn’t fair and that applies to pretty much everything. That’s $1000 phone you bought is barley worth $357 right now. I’m pretty sure it didn’t cost that much to make these things but like DAMN. Capitalism sucks.

In summary, I don’t know much about politics but I would be the human party. I don’t care about left or right. I’m the one that doesn’t care about money. I care more about life and creativity. Peoples right to enjoyment and living a happy life with others regardless of gender. Survival of the human race and advancement into the future where more things are free and we can constantly focus on creating an even BETTER one. We can’t go anywhere without each other especially if we’re all just a bucket of crabs. To greedy and self destructive constantly looking out only for themselves. Seriously get your act together humans before you kickstart your own downfall. If we’re all trying to make a profit, nobody does. The best things in life are free. You can pursue wealth for your future or you can focus and live and enjoy and love the now. Mario kart style, where all in this race for life and we all deserve a winning chance.

[avengerscompound]

The Unicorn - Chapter 14

The Unicorn:  A Pepperony Fanfic PREVIOUS

Series Masterlist

Buy me a coffee with Ko-fi Word Count:    2075

Pairing:  Tony Stark x F!Reader x Pepper Potts

Warnings:  Sex talk.  Pregnancy

Synopsis:  The three of you go house shopping in New York to see if you can find something you’re all happy with.

Chapter 14

Over the next few weeks, things ramped up a lot.  There was another ultrasound to be had at 8 weeks and Tony and Pepper were determined to figure out where you should all live that gave the best options for school and work.

You seemed completely nonplussed on the issue.  You still went to Avengers training in the early morning and you continued going to your lab in the afternoon.  Just now before you left you seemed to struggle with the thought that you might throw up first.

By the time of the eight-week ultrasound, you weren't just thinking about it.  You had to factor in an extra ten minutes for throwing up before you made your way down for the dawn run.  It never stopped you though.  If you could go to training hungover a little bit of morning sickness wasn't going to stop you.

The strange thing was that Pepper seemed to be suffering with it too.  Initially, the three of you had put it on her just not handling vomit very well.  It wasn’t a totally uncommon thing that when someone threw up it might set someone else off.  Pepper had never been the weak stomached type but it was possible worries about the pregnancy was already making her slightly nauseated.

By the time of the ultrasound both Tony and you were teasing her about it being sympathy vomit.

The ultrasound went fine everyone was excited to see the twins again.  They still kind of just looked like a weird blurry picture of packaging peanuts.   Tony did still feel both relieved and excited when he heard the fast squish-squish sound of their heartbeats.

After the ultrasound, the three of you went to the first of the choices for the new home.  New York City.

When Tony had made the move to the compound he’d dissolved all his property.  Avengers Tower had become the Baxter Building.  It was probably the least practical course for them because it would mean reopening a branch of Stark Industry so that Pepper had an office and you had a lab, buying a home, and possibly opening a branch of the Avengers if you were set on remaining on the team after your maternity leave was up.

Tony had booked them the penthouse suite at the Gramercy Park while they looked at options.

“Dalton.  That’s the reason.”  Pepper said.  Her heels clicked loudly on the garish marble floors of the Upper East Side mansion they were inspecting.

The house was hideous.  The ‘American Renaissance’ period of architecture was a travesty.  The whole place, with its marble floors, chandeliers, ceiling murals featuring cherubs and gold scrollwork, looked more like a museum than a home.  It was dated, to say the least.  And dated to a period of opulence with no taste or subtlety.  All Tony could think was apart from the library which he’d keep for Pepper (the murals would have to go), the pool and the cinema, he’d gut the whole thing and start over.

“I don’t know, Pep.  It could have 100 Dalton’s but there’s no yard…”

“There’s a roof garden.”

“You want the twins playing on the roof?”  He said raising an eyebrow.

“Right, of course.”  She said heading into the kitchen.  “This is nice.”

“Yeah.  Very light and spacious.  I still think… I’d have to invest at least a cool billion to have us set up and even then it wouldn’t be right and it doesn’t feel like a home.”  He said running his hand over the floating kitchen island.

“What do you think?”  Pepper asked turning to you.

“I don’t love it.”  You said.  “I mean, doesn’t it scream masked orgy to you?  I bet naked asses have been all over everything.”

“Oh yeah.  I thought it looked familiar.”  Tony teased.

“God, you’re disgusting,”  Pepper said, whacking him.  Tony laughed and rubbed his arm.  “Well, we don’t have to get this one.  There were more options.”

“Yeah, but they’ll all be either Townhouses or Penthouses.  They won’t be where we can teach them to ride their bikes or run around with their dog.  We’ll have to take them to the park every time we want to do something like that.”  Tony said.  “Plus there’s the other investments involved.  S.I. is upstate now.  I’d have to reopen here.”

“The Avengers.”  You added.

“Yeah, I moved that because it was unsafe to have it just - in the middle of the city.”  Tony agreed.

Pepper pursed her lips.  She didn’t like that you wanted to stay with the Avengers the same way she didn’t like that Tony wouldn’t give up being Iron Man back in the day.  “We can consider it though right?  That’s what we’re doing here?  Looking at each option and picking the best?”

“Yeah, you're right.  Being here is better than in the compound.”  Tony conceded.  “I don't know how big the pull to Dalton is compared to just buying land near the compound and building exactly what we want though.”

“There aren't any schools around the compound though.”  Pepper complained.

“Start your own one, Elon Musk style.”  You said.

“We are not starting our own one like Elon.”  Pepper said sternly.

“I don't know… Maybe we should.  Give another incentive for people to stay on if it was more family friendly.”  Tony said with a shrug.

“Tony…”  Pepper sighed.  He knew that tone so he dropped it.

You went out to the balcony and looked out over the park.  Tony came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.  “It is a cool city though.”  You said.

“I won't argue that.”  He agreed, kissing your neck.

“Can we get out of this house?  I feel like I'm in a museum and the temptation to just touch everything for no good reason is making my fingers itchy.”  You said.

Tony chuckled and his hands ran over your stomach.  It was still far too early to show.  Even so, he loved that he could touch you and know that his children were in there and it wouldn’t be too long until he got to hold them.  It helped put that nervous impatience he felt in check.  “I’d gut it if we bought it.”

“Oh, yeah?”  You said turning in his arms.  “Not the library.”

“No, but that mural for sure.  I’d make it more shelves.”

“Oh, tell me more.”

“All the ugly ass marble and gold would go.  I’d change the light fittings to something sleeker but still a feature.  I’d keep timber as a feature, but make it less ornate.  Sleek lines but the timber would make it feel more home than office like.  The art would be modern but not surreal.  Maybe some Warhol and Pollack.  Maybe include some impressionists to break it up.  I’d install FRIDAY obviously.  The kitchen would be a similar layout but modern.  White and black.  Granite tops not marble.  I'd make the first floor about entertaining and the top two for us.  Bedrooms.  Living room.  That would be our family space.  It would be warmer colors.  Colors that take mess more.  I'd put a lab for us in the basement.  Probably a garage too but I might keep my of my collection out here.  There would be an office for Pep.  A gym.  I'd keep the cinema and the pool.”

You grinned and pecked his lips.  “Your mind has been racing even though you don't want this place.”

“Well, I mostly just want my girls to be happy.  If buying this eyesore makes you happy, then I’m happy.”  He said.

“That’s sweet.  But it won’t.  I don’t even think Pepper is sold on it.”  You said pulling him back inside.  “God, that bathroom is going to be in my nightmares.  The green marble toilet.”

Tony laughed.  “Yeah, that would be first to go.”

They made their back inside and found Pepper coming down the stairs followed by the real estate agent.  “Okay.  Let's go.  I think I’ve seen enough.”

“Good.  Let’s get something to eat.”  Tony said.  “I’m feeling Gray’s Papaya.”

Pepper scrunched her nose.  “I think the smell would make me throw up.”   She said.  “If you want local let’s go to Katz’s.”

You looked her up and down.  “You’re gonna need to dial in this sympathy sickness thing or see a doctor because I feel like you’re stealing my thunder.”

She scowled.  “I’m not doing it on purpose.”

“So, go see a doctor.”  You pushed.

Tony followed you outside where Happy was waiting with the car.  The three of you slid into the back seat and Pepper huffed.  “I just… it’s only in the mornings or certain smells.  It’s got to just be some weird sympathy thing.”

“Maybe you’re actually pregnant,”  Tony said.  He’d meant it as a joke but as soon as the words were out of his mouth it was like something clicked into place.  Maybe she was pregnant.  He couldn’t remember when she last had her period, and they’d been tracking it regularly right up until they did the first IVF run with you.

“Ha-ha, very funny, Tony.”  Pepper snarked.

“But maybe you are pregnant, Pepper.”  You said.

“You do kind of look like you’re glowing.”  Happy added looking in the rearview mirror.

“No.  How could I be?  We did all that IVF.”  She stopped talking and seemed to try and count something off on her fingers.  “How could I be?”

“Hap, stop at a pharmacy and get some pregnancy tests would you?”  Tony said.

“You got it, boss.”  Happy replied and swerved the car around, double parking it outside a CVS on Lexington.  He jumped out and ran inside as horns sounded behind him and someone cursed them as they went around.

“But… we couldn’t.  It wasn’t working.”  Pepper said.

“I can’t explain it Pepper, but it’s possible, right?  It would explain this.”  Tony said.

“How come you get glowing and I get a breakout on my jaw?”  You snarked.

“The glow is oily skin.”  Pepper said absentmindedly.  “It depends on how dry your skin was to begin with.”

“God damn it.”  You cursed.

“What will we do?”  Pepper said looking at him.  “We already have twins.”

“Triplets?”  Tony said making an exaggerated shrug.  He was pretty far from actually being worried about this.  He was actually pretty excited at the thought of the possibility of a large instant family.

“Does it count as triplets if two different people are carrying them?”  You asked.

“I don’t know.  I mean, they’re genetically me and Pepper and they’ll be due roughly the same time.” He mused.  “What counts?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s housed in the same uterus.”  You said.

“Can we please argue about that when I’m not freaking out”  Pepper groaned.

Happy ran back out and jumped into the car passing the paper bag back to Tony.  “Hotel?”  He asked.

“Yes, please,”  Pepper said.

“And can you swing past Katz’s after.  Get us some Matzo Ball Soup, a garden salad, and a Reuben.”  Tony added.

“And Knish.”  You added.  “Potato ones.”

“Sure thing.”  Happy said pulling back into traffic.

He drove the three of you back to the Gramercy and Tony lead you and Pepper back up to the Penthouse.  Pepper was in full panic mode by the time they got upstairs and rushed straight into the main bathroom and locked the door.

“Are you okay in there, Pepper?”  You called, leaning on the door.

“Yes, leave me alone to pee in peace.”  She called back.

You snorted and moved to Tony.  “Well then,”  You said.  “I bet she is.”

“I’m not taking that bet.”  He said.

“Oh go on.  A billion dollars.  I’ll bet you a billion dollars.”

“What do you need a billion dollars for?”

You shrugged and flopped down on the couch.   The door opened and Pepper slumped out.  “Positive.  There wasn’t even a wait for lines to show.  It was right away.”

Tony rushed to her side and pulled her into a hug.  A second later you had slammed into their sides and hugged them both tightly.

“Oh my god, this is amazing,”  Tony said.

“We’re going to be pregnant at the same time.  How awesome is that?”  You added.

“I don’t - how - how do we do this?”  She said.  “How did this happen?”

Tony really didn’t know the answer to that.  All he knew for sure was he had the resources and he was excited.  He was going to be part of a big family and he’d make sure they didn’t have to worry about anything.

// NEXT

[wild3flow3r]

Chapter Six

January 7th

Lorelai did not want to interview for a job as Xavier Styles’ assistant. She wanted nothing more to do with the Styles’, and if she got the job then she most definitely would not want to admit that Harry had helped her do so. But she desperately needed a job. She did not want to move back in with her parents or Jones who had offered to house her for a while, and not because she was too embarrassed or too prideful to do it. Lorelai didn’t want to move away from London. Sure, she didn’t have many friends here, or any for that matter, but the city called to her like it was always where she was meant to be.

So Lorelai sucked it up and gave Xavier a call after the New Year started, and after a short interview earlier this morning he instantly gave her the job. It was nice to have this to fall back onto, but she promised herself that this job would only be temporary. She would look for other jobs while working for Xavier, and when she finds one she will rid herself of all Styles’ for the rest of her life.

“I haven’t had an assistant in quite some time,” Xavier notifies her as he shows her to a desk outside of his office. “So it might take me some time to get used to.”

Harry looked so much like his Uncle Xavier that it was almost uncanny. From their freakishly tall height to their bright green eyes, Lorelai could definitely see the family resemblance. The only difference was that Xavier’s hair was a sandy blonde that was starting to turn gray. All this did for Lorelai was further prove one of her theories about Harry, that he and his family were just a bunch of clones sent to Earth to ruin everyone’s life.

Except Xavier was so much nicer than Harry. In place of Harry’s snarl, Xavier was always smiling at her and being respectful to her. Being a nice human being must skip a generation, Lorelai thinks to herself.

Lorelai sets her bag down on the desk and turns to smile politely to him. “Well, just think of it this way. Whenever there’s a part of your job that comes up that you don’t want to do, the tedious work, just give me a call and I’ll get it done for you.”

Xavier shakes his head in amusement before walking off towards his office. “Get yourself settled, and in about an hour or so I’ll be emailing you something that I’ll need to be faxed over to another doctor. Faxing might be my least favorite part of the job.”

Lorelai frowns, which Xavier thankfully doesn’t catch because he’s already shut his office door behind him. Another thing that Styles’ have in common, she supposes.

Lorelai sits down at the chair provided for her, and clicks the computer mouse twice. Xavier Styles owned his own medical practice, naturally. He’s a cognitive behavioral therapist for children and teenagers, meaning he helped his patients confront any types of problems they were having and help them get better. Lorelai really respected him for his work; it was much better being a assistant for him than for a divorce lawyer.

As it was the first day the practice was open since the New Year started, Xavier was taking the day to settle back into the work setting and would start seeing patients the following day. Lorelai types in her new login information that Xavier had given her, and luckily she finally gets it right on the third try. After signing into her new email as well, Lorelai takes a moment to text Jones and her mother that she’s gotten this new job. She knows they will be pleased with how much more money she’ll be making as well.

The hour passed by slowly, but finally Xavier sent her the documents that needed to be faxed. She’s about to print them out when the phone on her desk begins to ring. After quickly clearing her throat, she picks the phone up and pressed it to her ear.

“Hello, this is Xavier Styles’ office. How may I help you?” Lorelai attempts to keep her voice as bright and chipper as possible.

“So my brother finally got himself an assistant, eh?” There was a man on the other side of the phone, and his rough voice instantly makes Lorelai tense up for two reasons. One, unless Harry had another uncle then Lorelai was currently speaking to his father. And two, just by the way he spoke Lorelai could tell that he was even worse than Harry, and he’d only said one thing to her.

“Yes sir, he just hired me today,” Lorelai lets him know, unable to think of anything else to say.

“You would think because… Well never mind. Just tell him I need to speak to him. It’s an urgent family matter.”

“Yes sir, please hold for a moment.” Lorelai's index finger presses a button on the phone so that it transfers her to Xavier’s office phone. She immediately lets out a loud breath from no longer being on the phone with another Styles’ man that she hopes she never has to meet. Two of them were enough for her.

“What is it, Miss Sterling?” Xavier asks, picking up his phone after two rings.

“Your brother is on line two, sir. He says he needs to speak to you about an urgent family matter.”

Xavier lets out a deep sigh. “Alright, thank you, Miss Sterling.” The line goes dead and Lorelai hangs up her phone. She stands then to print out and fax the documents.

Xavier exits his office ten minutes later, just as Lorelai was finishing up. He eyes her for a moment with a contemplative expression. It makes her uncomfortable, but she waits for him to speak first.

“How long were you on the phone with my brother before you transferred his call over?”

Lorelai stands by her desk with her hands behind her back. “Only for a moment,” she responds.

“Did you tell him… Did you tell him about knowing Harry?”

Lorelai cocks her head to the side before shaking it twice. “Only that it was my first day here, and then I transferred the call.”

Xavier nods curtly before turning around. “If he calls again, don’t interact in any small talk with him. Just immediately transfer him over, or if I’m not here apologize for it and hang up.” He shuts his office doors behind him.

What the hell is going on? Lorelai sits back down in her chair with a soft thud. She didn’t really seem to know why it mattered that she knew Harry, but Xavier was acting pretty perturbed after the phone call. Just a few more weeks until I can find another job, Lorelai reminds herself. Just a few more weeks until she can rid herself of this family forever.

***

As there weren’t any patients today, Xavier let Lorelai leave an hour earlier than her newly scheduled release time. She was very thankful for the fact, and already she could see that she would enjoy working with Xavier for the next few weeks drastically more than she ever liked working with Bertram. Her original plan had been to go directly home and call her parents while making dinner, but instead she caught the tube that took her away even further from her home. She had struck an idea as she was exiting Xavier’s practice, and the idea was making her act on impulse.

Lorelai must have been out of her mind, she told herself that several times as she stood outside the building in this freezing weather. The sky looked like it was about to start pouring at any moment, but Lorelai stood stock still against a wall. She was beginning to shake, from the cold and also from what she was about to do, but she barely even noticed.

Lorelai stood outside for exactly thirty-three minutes before Harry Styles exited the Clemens & Son building. He didn’t notice her at first as he strolled over to his car, his ever present frown playing across his lips. He still didn’t notice her as he threw his briefcase into the backseat of his car and closed the door with a quick slam, even though she was standing only five feet away from him. Lorelai walks those few feet over to him just before he can grip the handle of the drivers side door, and taps his shoulder twice. He jumps around so fast, his eyes wild with surprise and confusion, and Lorelai would have laughed if he wasn’t Harry Styles.

“Lorelai-”

“We don’t work together anymore.” Lorelai states calmly.

Harry raises an eyebrow. “We don’t.”

“You’re no longer my superior.”

“I’m not.” His voice was thick with uncertainty.

“You’re an arsehole, did you know that?”

Harry leans against his car, almost like she’d pushed him. “Yeah, I know that.”

“You don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

“I don’t,” he responds, but it sounded more like he was just repeating her words than actually agreeing with her.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you off so bad since the first day you walked into Clemens & Son. You were such a prick to me that day. You said things about me behind my back before you even knew me.”

Harry frowns now, the memory of his first day playing in his mind. “I did.”

“And then you just get me fired? How could you do that? Everything I’ve ever done to you, none of it will ever match those two terrible things you’ve done to me.” Lorelai was close to tears, but she takes a few deep breaths to try and keep them at bay.

He watches her carefully, taking in her trembling form and wobbling lip. He places his hands on her shoulders and she goes to shrug them off but it only makes him hold onto her tighter.

“You’re freezing,” he acknowledges while holding her still. “Get in my car, I’ll drive you home.”

Lorelai shakes her head, but he’s already leading her to the passenger side of his car. He opens the door for her, but she doesn’t make a move to step into the car.

“Why did you fire me? Tell me why you fired me, and I’ll get into the car,” Lorelai demands.

Harry sighs, his body blocking hers from trying to walk away from him if she wanted to. “I’ve announced today to Bertram that in two months Clemens & Son will have to close down. He spends money like he isn’t running a company, and it’s finally caught up to him. If you were laid off at the same time as the rest of us and couldn’t find a job immediately after, or if I couldn’t get my uncle to hire you, then the company doesn’t owe you anything. But if you were fired before the announcement was made, then we owe you a certain amount of money each month until you find another job or six months after your firing date, whichever comes first. It was just a precaution.”

“But-”

“Please, Lorelai,” Harry cuts her off and lightly pushes her towards the open car door. “Can we talk about the rest of this in the car before we catch frostbite?”

Lorelai’s shoulders slump down before climbing into the car. Harry shuts the door behind her before entering on his own side, immediately turning the car on and the heat to its maximum. She leans her head against the headrest while closing her eyes and trying to catch her bearings. The rain starts to pour down only a few seconds later.

It was silent for about another minute before Lorelai speaks up again. “Why were you so rude your first day at Clemens & Son?”

Harry stays quiet and instead pulls his car out of its parking spot. Lorelai sighs when Harry continues to be silent and she knows she won’t get an answer.

“You’ve ruined me, did you know that?” Lorelai looks over to him, and the frown on his face looks different than it normally does. It’s not laced with annoyance or stress, but with sadness. But Lorelai also thinks that it might just look that way by the lack of lighting surrounding them, because she’s pretty sure that Harry Styles can’t feel any normal emotions other than anger.

“I don’t like myself when I’m with you. You turn my into someone I don’t like. And then I think of you when I’m by myself and all the awful things you make me feel, and I feel terrible about myself even when you’re not around. I never used to feel like this, ever.”

Harry still doesn’t go to speak, and this frustrates Lorelai even more. She wants to hit him, push him around until he makes a noise, because she wants some sort of acknowledgement from him. Some way to know that he’s listening to her and properly taking in the words she’s saying.

“Pull the car over, I want to get out. I can get myself home,” Lorelai demands of him when she’s finally tired of his silence.

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s freezing outside and with the rain you’ll get sick.” He finally responds, barely taking a moment to glance at her before looking back towards the road.

“I’d rather catch the flu than spend another minute with you. It’s not like you care about what happens to me anyways, so just let me get out.”

Harry laughs now, but it’s not one of amusement. The sound causes Lorelai to freeze in her seat and it sends chills down her spine. “You don’t think I fucking care?” He does pull the car over, but he keeps the doors locked so that Lorelai can’t escape. He turns towards her then in his seat, and Lorelai leans against the window of her door.

“I know you don’t,” Lorelai responds quickly.

“I wasn’t talking about you on my first day. It was that woman who worked downstairs, Martha, Margaret, whatever the fuck her name was. She got fired the week after I started working there. Sure I wasn’t the nicest to you on my first day, and maybe I should’ve made those comments about what’s her name in a more professional fashion, but I had a bit of an ego-complex back then that made me think I was the best fucking thing that happened to that office ever. And then you argued with me on everything I did every single day, and I’ll admit you knocked me down a couple pegs. Also I’ve only just recently come to terms with this, but no matter how hard I tried to be the best worker at Clemens & Son, no matter how much work I put into my job, you were always fucking better.

“I’ve been trying to get you a raise from Bertram for almost three months before you brought the idea up to me. I spent countless hours trying to convince Bertram to let us have Christmas off just so you could go see your family. I ordered you a teapot for your collection for Christ’s sake, and don’t ask me why because I genuinely do not know why. The amount of times I told Bertram to stop staring at you like… like… well you know what I mean. It was endless, and I did it because I knew how uncomfortable it would make you feel. So don’t say that I don’t care, because I bent over backwards to get my uncle to even consider hiring an assistant. And I don’t bend for anyone.”

Lorelai sits there in shock, Harry’s words entering her system and her body wanted to immediately reject them. They didn’t sound right, the things Harry was saying, they didn’t sound like him. But if what he was saying was true, then she didn’t really know him at all, not really.

“I’ve been horrible to you to your face, I know that. I didn’t think… I don’t want you to not like yourself.”

“I… I want to go home,” Lorelai finally responds, crossing her arms over her chest as if hugging herself. “Just take me home.” She would have demanded she be let out, let her find her own way home, but she didn’t think she could get her legs to work properly in this moment.

So Harry pulls away from the curb, both of their confessions thick in the air, but nobody speaks. Not one word for the entire ride, and Lorelai doesn’t wish him any goodbyes as she steps out of the car. She barely even waited for him to come to a full stop before throwing her door open.

Lorelai's only two feet away from the car when Harry rolls the window down.

“I’m sorry, Lorelai. I really am.”

Lorelai turns towards him, her mouth open to say something even though no words were coming to her mind, but Harry drove off before he could face her reaction.

[krpk-remaking]

Dr Sex Epic Character - maxx @maxxeruz

Leorio Paladinight is easily one of the most underrated hxh characters, both within the fandom, merch and the manga itself, because he really is the most normal out of the main four and i really think he should be appreciated more because hes a great character!

Once again, shoutout to Mags @senritsus for helping with this! Go follow him!!

Im gonna be talking about Leorios Character, where his arc will go, and his connection with Kurapika. This is gonna be a little harder than writing Kurapika meta, since theres (sadly) a lot less Leorio content and we know a lot less about his background but ill try my best! Leorio deserves it.

Reading my Kurapika meta might make this a little more enjoyable, since i touched on Leorios and Kurapikas relationship more in depth there but you can read this post without reading it!

1 . Leorios Personality And His Past

When we first meet Leorio, hes introduced as a stupid, greedy and quick to anger Pervert, not an uncommon trope for a comedic relief character in anime. Those comedic relief characters often lack personality beyond that, a fact that is actually commented on by Kurapika.

But thanks to Kurapika, about seven chapters in, we learn more about Leorio and his motivations and as the manga goes on, it becomes obvious that there is way more to Leorio than just someone whos there for comedic relief.

Leorio grew up in (presumably extreme) poverty, loosing a friend due to their lack of money, motivating him to want to become a doctor whos able to help people for free.

"I'm a simple guy. Figured I'd become a doctor... so I could cure some kid with the same disease, tell his parents they owed me nothing! Me... A doctor! Now there's a joke!! Do you know how much it costs to even try to become a doctor? The mind boggles!! It's always about money! Always!! That's why I want it!"

Knowing this, Leorios character already gains a lot of depth. Sadly, the manga doesnt mention when exactly his friend died but the 2011 Anime follows the manga more closely so ill go with the fact that his friend died when they were younger. Most of Leorios actions can be explained with the guilt he feels over the death of his friend, how useless he often feels and the way his upbringing in poverty affected him, for example at the very beginning, the fight he picks with Kurapika stems from the fact that Kurapika didnt respect him and was acting as if he was better than him.

Leorio absolutely hates feeling like hes at a disadvantage, or like someone is looking down on him, probably due to getting little respect during his childhood due to his poverty. This also just might be the reason for him to constantly dress in a suit, something that rich, important people often wear. He often overplays his pride, puts up a facade and the way he presents himself really just screams overcompensation in so many ways

Here, he gets upset at Killua because he feels disadvantaged once again. This feeling of inferiority is often the reason for the fights Leorio has with Kurapika and in this instance Killua, he absolutely hates being looked down on. The Other reason he fights with someone early on is, because they dont value life in his eyes, for example the old woman who was asking them to choose between two human lives, toying with them per say, and not valuing them.

Leorio values human life, especially those of his friends over everything else and has a strong sense of Morality, since he did acknowledge he was in the wrong and apologized to the old lady.

When Hisoka was playing with the lives of the others during the hunter exam, as well as Leorios and his friends, Leorio got upset once again and, knowing just how powerful Hisoka was attacked him anyways with no regard for his safety.

He mentions “being toyed with” twice, something people do with people they look down on/are stronger than, where Leorios hate of feeling inferior once again comes back to show.

But, While Leorio absolutely hates being regarded worse than everyone, he also dislikes being viewed as someone whos better than everyone and gets very embarassed everytime someone compliments him/shows him positive attention. This is either due to the fact that he isnt used to it, or that he doesnt think he deserves it (note how hes always drawn with an embarassed blush).

Leorio is a very selfless man, whos ready to do everything in his power to help his friends because he doesnt want to ever lose another friend again. During the election arc, he focuses his entire speech around wanting to help Gon and uses his power to call for everyone to try and help Gon,

when Illumi manipulates Killua into killing during the hunter exam arc, Leorio is ready to give up his hunter licence for Killua,

And, being well aware of what Illumi was capable of, refused to let him through the door to protect Gon.

reassured Killua, showing his intense care for his friends (and little kids since Killua had actually not even been that nice to him),

When Killua had to fight against the serial killer, before they knew about his real strength, Leorio assured him that he wouldnt have to fight,

he willingly risked his life and let hundreds of snakes bite him just to warn Kurapika and Gon and to assure their chances of success, and before that tried to disband their team so they could still advance if he failed,

and, without any fear, they couldve sense that, stared down and yelled at the phantom troupe.

Leorio hates feeling useless and despite that, often does. He felt useless when his friend died and thus decided to become a doctor to cope with this guilt, he felt useless when Gon was sick, like his friend, and he couldnt do anything once again and he feels useless when Kurapika wont let him help him and wont let him reach out but despite that he keeps trying, to fight his guilt, to make sure that Kurapika is safe and to do his best to help.

He describes studying to become a doctor as something he does for himself, he doesnt see that notion, becoming a doctor to help people for free, as something selfless that should be admired.

He doesnt see becoming a doctor as something that he should brag with or that people should know. When he first meets Gon and Kurapika he puts up the front of wanting money to buy cars, mansions, wine, etc, all things one usually would want with money, when he really wanted the money to study so he could help people. Leorio thinks hes useless and good for nothing while everyone else fights and he just “selfishly” studies, but hes not useless at all and obviously studying to become a doctor to help the poor isnt something thats selfish at all. Maybe his motivations, to deal with his guilt over losing a friend, are a little selfish but the fact that he even blames himself and that he copes by trying to protect and value life wherever he can show that Leorio himself isnt a selfish person, hes someone whos ready to put his life on the line for his friends and others any day, despite being less reckless than the other three.

He sees Kurapikas quest for revenge as something noble, while he thinks very little of himself. Even during the election arc, after he had come into second and third place multiple times he was still convinced, somehow, that no one was gonna vote for him.

Even Ging a very experienced and talented hunter, though he is a terrible person, thinks highly of Leorio,

even copying the punch he threw at him, which Leorio, as Ging theorizes, mightve developed to get rid of tumors that are unreachable with operation, showing just how smart Leorio really is.

Leorio is someone whos been alone a lot and, while hes the least reckless and best at selfcare out of all four protagonists, had little regard for himself in especially the first arc, where he just kept jumping into dangerous situation. An explanation for that could be, that he had no one to care about and no one that cared about him before he went to take the hunter exam since weve never actually heard about any family he had or has. He could possibly be an orphan, explaining the missing mention of any family and the extreme attachment he has to Gon, Killua and Kurapika.

Him being orphaned would also perfectly fit into hunter x hunters theme of finding new family after losing another, Kurapika losing his entire clan, Gon losing his father, Killua losing his entire family except Alluka since his family is terrible and as good as dead to him and Leorio just never having really had one. So, the reason he becomes a little more responsible in arcs after the hunter exam is probably, that he finally had people to care about again, that also cared about him so now he doesnt feel like no one would miss him if he died anymore.

In short, Leorio, while being extremely selfless, caring, fearless, moral and empathic, thinks very little of himself and often feels useless and selfish. He cares most about the well being of his friends and has deep rooted feelings of guilt about the death of his friend, even though it was out of his control and he doesnt believe that his goal to be a doctor or really just he himself is deserving of any praise.

His wish to be a doctor is a mix of that extreme internalized guilt from “letting” his friend die, his selflessness that just got pushed up by the guilt and the empathy he gained by growing up in poverty and the first hand experience on why exactly free healthcare is needed.

2. Leorios Relationship With Kurapika, His Guilt, And How His Arc Could End

I wont go in depth about them here, since i already have one that multiple times but they truly are so, so important to eachother and are in many ways two sides of the same coin. Both of them have lost people close to them and theyve dealt with it in such different ways. It made Leorio want to protect life and heal people, focusing his nen around helping others (see: the punch he used being something he actually developed to deal with tumors) and it made Kurapika want to destroy life and kill people, taking revenge and destroying himself in the process, mirrored within his nen ability too (as it literally kills him to use emperor time, one hour of his life for every second). So this set-up, combined with the guilt Leorio feels over not being able to help his friend or Gon, combined with how important they are to eachother, combined with how the current arc has the both together on that boat, I feel like it would really make sense for Leorio to finally be able to save someone, furthering his character arc in a very satisfying way and also helping Kurapikas arc, letting him accept help from others and becoming less self destructive.

“Leorio is an unabashedly selfless character who very deliberately centered his life around helping others and the thought that he cant do that with Kurapika is definitely something he tries to take blame for.” (directly quoted from mags @senritsus <3) If something were to happen to Kurapika while Leorio is near and on top of that on doctor duty, where helping people is his only job, i couldnt imagine the guilt Leorio would feel. Hes always been looking out for Kurapika since they became close friends (and maybe the nearest thing to a best friend either had had in years) during the hunter exam and Kurapika did always try to be someone who calmed Leorio and helped him be more rational, though that changed when he began his down spiral after killing his first person and they drifted further apart and Leorio took on the job of calming down Kurapika.

Kurapika calming Leorio VS

Leorio calming Kurapika

Kurapika is in desperate need of saving and having Leorio be that person to save him would be so perfect for both of their arcs.

This arc already set up the tension in their relationship at the very beginning, or atleast before the succession war began and i do believe it has to be resolved (relatively) soon, especially because of this (once again my favorite) panel, showing Leorio as one of the four people Kurapika cares most about.

And, to quote my Kurapika meta post about this panel, Hes thinking about moments where they made him happy/made him care about them, Gon and Killua with their food fight in the park where they cheered him up and Leorio on the phone. Its him calling to check up on Kurapika. Kurapika really did appreciate it so much, even if he doesnt show it, even if he keeps pushing Leorio away. And he does care about them, even if he doesnt want to! The way Leorio expresses care for his friends, which is very vocal and direct, is so good for Kurapika because even if he still cant really believe or accept it, its still something he appreciates, somehow. I am not (!) saying that they will definitely end up with eachother but they are definitely incredibly important to the others character development and i dont think Togashi will forget about that.

If youve read all this, thank you so so much i really appreciate it! Leorio is an incredible Character that deserves more love and i hope everything i wrote here is coherrent!! If i made any mistakes or if you just have any thoughts youd like to share on this topic please send me an ask! <3

[angrylizardjacket]

ask you destiny to dance [7] {Roger Taylor}

[masterpost]

“What did you do? Ash is more pissed at you than usual.” Brian’s looking covertly between Ash wiping glasses at the bar, and Roger, adjusting the height of his high hats a few weeks after he’d confronted her about August. She hadn’t spoken to him directly since then, but the other band members were starting to catch on.

“I didn’t do anything-” Roger tries to protest, but Freddie’s laugh cuts him off.

“He made a comment about Pocket Rocket’s dear friend.” Freddie adds, having adapted to the nickname with ease, an amused smile on his face as he looks at Roger over his shoulder.

“You mean her boyfriend.” Roger snaps, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ash tense at the bar, giving away her eavesdropping, though he didn’t call her out on it.

“Ash isn’t dating that guy, he’s like forty.” Brian laughed, but Roger caught the way Freddie’s expression darkened, though he didn’t dwell on it, and Roger’s own smile became knowing and bitter.

“Yeah, listen Bri, I know what I said.” He responded venomously, and the mood around them sobered considerably. “I don’t like him, okay, he’s too old for her,” after a beat, he wrinkled his nose, “got a dickhead aura.” 

“You’ve met him once.” John points out, trying to lighten the aura. Roger just bristled at the statement.

“Rog is just fond of her,” Freddie cuts in, voice a little condescending, smile mischievous, “let him be jealous, it might take him down a peg or two.”  

“I’m not bloody jealous of that creep!” After a beat of feeling particularly hurt, and Freddie’s commenting hitting a little too close to home, he hears himself lashing out, “And how low do you think my standards really are, Freds?” And that shocked Freddie into silence, eyes wide and disbelieving, his eyebrows raised, as he turned away, jaw clenched.

“You really are just trying to burn that bridge while we’re standing on it, aren’t you?” Brian shook his head, sighing heavily as he went back to his guitar.

“Roger,” John said carefully, coming over to speak quietly to the drummer, as the rest of the band turned away, uncomfortable, “let me get the drinks tonight.” And it’s not what he expected to hear, but when he looks to John, John’s looking over at the bar. Ash is making direct eye contact with him, her customer service smile looking mostly threatening as she keeps polishing the same spot on a glass. “Because that woman is going to spit in all of your drinks and make you watch.” John explains, now looking to Roger, who’s expression was carefully neutral, trying not to betray his own anger at himself. “And as much as I love our dear Pocket Rocket, it’s not something I particularly want.” 

She’s definitely gone back to hating him, and he didn’t realise how much it would hurt. 

The worst part is that she’s so damn happy around everyone else, and he hates himself for being hurt by that. He’s angry, but not at her (never at her, not for something like this) he’s angry because he sees the way she smiles at him from behind the bar, and he sees the way August spends more time looking at the girls in the crowd, though she can’t even tell from where she’s standing. Roger’s angry because she fucking gushes about August - “He’s just made tenure!” - and yet he won’t even touch her if there’s someone else around. He’s livid because she’s so clearly in love with him, but she still can’t bring herself to tell the others his name because she knows - knows - something’s up with August, even if she doesn’t want to admit it, even if the others can’t see it.

Except that’s not the reason she doesn’t say his name.

“He’s here at every show, we should say thank you.” Brian tries after a gig, talking mainly to Roger and John, as Freddie had been giggling with Mary, the two of them in their own little world. Ash is nowhere to be seen. Roger takes another drag of his cigarette.

“Heaps of people are fans of us, it doesn’t mean we have to personally thank them every time.” Roger scoffed, but Brian made a noise in the back of his throat that sounded like he disagreed.

“It’s a show of good faith, we should at least shake hands with-” and he paused for a moment, brow furrowing, “what’d she say his name was again?”

“Doctor Reid, if I recall.” John piped up, and Brian shifted his weight, crossing his arms.

“Yeah, but what’s his first name? That sounds so formal, like, ‘Oh, can I grab you a beer Doctor Reid?’” He put on a voice, laughing at his own joke, looking to John, who just shrugged helplessly.

“August.” Roger’s voice is very quiet, hunched in on himself sitting in the back of the van. Brian frowns, leaning in a little, confused as to both how Roger has kept this for so long, and what the name actually was. “His name’s August.” Roger repeated, voice heavy but louder this time. Freddie freezes. “She calls him Gus.” He adds.

“You’re joking, right?” Freddie says into the uncertain silence, and that’s the moment that the back door comes crashing open and Ash comes out, grinning, hands in her pockets.

“Hey guys,” she grinned, nodding at them, not even sparing Roger a glace, “could I have my jacket back? You can drop the pants back tomorrow if you like.” Freddie turns to her, eyes wide, disbelieving smile still frozen almost painfully onto his face, not removing the oversized, blood red velour button down shirt Freddie had been wearing over a black singlet.

“Is that man we keep seeing Gus?” He asked, voice scarily neutral. None of the others had ever heard him like this, had barely heard Freddie genuinely angry like this, and Ash’s expression dropped.

“I’ve gotta go.” It’s not the answer any of them expect, nor is Ash turning on her heel and heading back into the pub before the door had even swung fully shut. Turning back to the band, they could all see that Freddie was livid.

“I’m going to gut the bastard. Gut him like a goddamn fish, I swear I will.” He seethed, hands curling and uncurling into fists, staring at the gravel. It was as if the air around him was snapping with the electricity of a storm. Looking up, all Freddie could see was how shocked the others were, even Roger, and he clenched his jaw, forcing himself to calm down.

“That’s the bastard that ruined her life.” He admitted through clenched teeth. “Roger’s fucking right, the man’s no good.” And Roger couldn’t even take the moment to bask in the vindication that would have usually surged through him at being told he was right, instead, his blood runs cold.

“He what?” Mary asked softly, and Freddie’s expression softened, looking finally between all of them, realising what he’d said.

“He’s the reason she was expelled from her last university, and...” Frowning, Freddie shakes his head. Brian, John, and Mary all took a moment to process this new information, shock written all over their faces. “It’s not my place,” and he started on a new strand of information, “he was her teacher, he started a clandestine affair with her when she started university, and,” pausing again, he sighed, the anger still clearly flowing through him, though it had simmered down to a bitter rage, “not my place.” He repeated. 

“Doesn’t he have a wife and family? How old was she?” Brian asked, a little aghast, and Freddie sighed.

“She was eighteen.” Freddie sighed.

“She was a kid.” Roger breathed, anger bubbling up inside of him.

“Hey, that’s only a year younger than me.” John pointed out, but Roger turned on him.

“Oh, I’m sorry John, are you having an affair with one of your teachers that we need to stage an intervention for?” He snapped, and John’s face fell, and he looked to the ground.

“I’m just saying she was an adult is all, doesn’t make it right, but she can make her own choices.” He paused. “She seems happy.” Both Freddie and Roger deflated at that, they’re all quiet for a long moment, and without a word, Freddie heads inside.

“Ash.” When he says her name, she looks up with an expression that tells him she’s ready to fight.

“He’s different now, Freddie.” She tells him, already defending herself and the man who she knows in her heart probably doesn’t deserve it. Freddie was ready to fight him the moment he heard August’s name, and he didn’t even know the full story. Sure he could gather the impact it had on Ash, but he never really truly realised the effect August had on her.

“What does that mean, Ash? What exactly is keeping me from coming over here and beating him bloody with my microphone next time we play here?” Freddie asked, voice very serious. Pulling off her apron, Ash told Maureen, who had been eavesdropping on the conversation, that she was knocking off for the night, which Maureen agreed to, and Ash walked around the bar and took Freddie’s hand.

“We’re not having this conversation here.” She hissed, pulling him into the staff bathroom and locking it behind them. “I love him.” She said through gritted teeth, crossing her hands over her chest, looking away. “And after everything I did, I think he still loves me too.”

“After everything you- Ash do you hear yourself?” Freddie takes a deep breath, steadying himself, holding her shoulders, “He start an affair with you, his student, refuse to be seen with you in public, and used his power within the faculty to kick you out of school when you wanted to stop-”

“I only wanted to stop because I found out he was engaged when his fiance found out about me!” Ash cried, as if it were somehow her fault. Freddie actually stepped back.

“Found out about you- He was engaged?!” He whispered, eyes wide and horrified. “Darling that’s nowhere near being your fault. He had a whole town calling you a slut and a homewrecker; he didn’t love you, he ran you out of Scotland.” 

“He ran me out of Fife.” She spits back the correction. “I would know, I was there.” But she doesn’t seem to connect to the words he’s saying, it’s as if she’s replayed the events in her head so many times that she’s become desensitised to it. “But he’s changed, I was practically a kid last time, I’m different now too. And if he didn’t love me then,” she looks a little hurt as she says it, and Freddie doesn’t know if he wants to hug her or shake some sense into her, “well I think he does now.” After a beat she ducked her gaze, voice becoming a weary sigh as she leaned against the counter. “Listen, Freds, I’ll keep him out of the bar, you won’t have to see him, but this is my life.”

“Don’t make the same mistake again-”

“He’s told me that Kira’s his ex-fiance, so I don’t think she’ll be a problem.” Ash rolled her eyes at Freddie, who opened his mouth to protest that that wasn’t the point, but she added. “Can you get Roger to shut up? I’m sick of hearing him bitching.” 

“Did something happen between you two?” Is what Freddie finally finds himself asking.

“I could get used to this.” Roger grins at her when she brings him a cup of tea in the warm light of the late morning, a book under one of her arms. She keeps using the mug with the cat faces on it for him, he’s started calling it ‘his mug’ and maybe she’s started calling it that too in her mind.

“Yeah, well don’t. You can get your own tea next time.” Ash laughed, sitting up beside in bed, cradling her own tea in one hand, pulling out the book with the other.

“Just show me where everything is, I think I could manage.” Roger chuckles, putting his free arm around her where she’s sat back against the headboard. “What are you reading?” Looking at him with a little surprise, Ash smiles slightly, taking a big gulp of tea, putting the mostly full cup on the bedside table before tucking herself against him, opening up the book.

“I found it in the common room, it’s one of those trashy romance novels,” after a beat, she closed the book, keeping her place with her finger, showing him the cover, where a woman was posing sensuously with a hand on a beautifully painted horse, “but I think she fucks the horse.” Roger snorts at that, his arm tightening around her just a little.

He doesn’t have an answer, just laughs, reading with her when she opens the book back up. It’s soft and domestic, her head on his chest as they both read the novella, sipping their tea on occasion. The blinds are down, but there’s still stripes of light peeking through, hitting the floor with golden light and the room feels warm and hazy. They stay like that for a long while, Roger actually becomes rather engrossed in the story, and when Ash shifts to lean over and take a sip of her tea, he takes the book to read ahead a few lines. When she turns back, she just watches him for a moment, a fond smile slowly spreading over her face, and when he finally looks up, realised he was caught, she leans forward, pressing a kiss to his lips, sweet, her hand coming up to cup his cheek, and when she pulls back, he’s smiling back at her, a little confused.

“What was that for?” He grinned, and Ash shrugged, ducking her head to hide her blush.

“I dunno, maybe the book got me going.” She lied easily, and Roger’s expression turns a little unreadable, though it’s clear he doesn’t believe her.

“We weren’t even up to the hot part!” He countered, and Ash laughed, taking the book from him, but he stays holding it, lets himself be pulled with it until he’s meeting her for a kiss, his hand on her wrist when he lets go of the book to move up her arm and start sliding off her dressing gown. “Not that I’m complaining.”

Yeah, Ash had thought, I could get used to this.

“Hello, Ash?” In the present, Freddie waves a hand in front of her face. Ash’s expression soured as her chest began to ache.

“No, okay? Nothing happened between us, Freddie. Roger’s just being a bitch.”

the ususal suspects: @deakydickfanpage @hollyissuchahoe  @laueecakee@smittyjaws @crystalshines2909 @i-am-sarah @legendsaresooftenwarnings@2ptonpt @benhardy24-7 @maiilovely @mickey-yr-a-goner @butter-times@heyyouitskay @tired-eyes-fairy-lights​ @yepimthatperson @missieluvsmurder @ironqueen98 @ceruleanrainblues ​ @banhbao329 @fantasticchaoticwho @ko-kitty @seven-seas-of-hi @mimisfangirlfantasy @aadjuric @rogmobile @cardybenhardy

[zerochanges]

Valentine’s Chocolates and Glass Masks

The romance genre in anime is a little weird, and honestly on the whole the majority of the genre in anime is probably a bit too slow for its own good. “Will they or won’t they” is something most romantic fiction is guilty of, but I think you’d be hard press to come across 150 episode TV series dedicated solely to that premise anywhere else. And this has nothing on the pure silliness that can come with the genre; hand holding, indirect kisses, masked secret admirers, all that good stuff. Really, I’m not here to trash talk romantic anime though, but as I sat down and tried to think about writing a Valentine's Day blog post I just couldn't help but think to myself how romance anime might be the hardest to explain to anyone not in the fandom. I mean, I think I’d have an easier time explaining the plot of any given saga in DBZ than I would explaining “Notice me, senpai” to somebody.

You know what though, I kind of ironically enjoy all of this. Yeah, pure romance anime can be cheesy, but it’s just the right amount cheese that it’s like, c’mon, how can you not enjoy this? Perhaps the worst (or best!) offender of this are older shoujo titles where they can seem almost downright like a soap opera at times. Shows like these are just so full of bizarre, off-the-walls, and over-the-top melodrama that they manage to suck me completely in. They’re heartbreaking, they’re engaging, and the times when they fail at being those things they are hilarious. 

My most recent experience with an older shoujo title like this would have to be studio Eiken’s 1984 adaptation of Glass Mask. Now Glass Mask (or Glass no Kamen as it is known by some) is a manga that started life in 1976 and to this day has yet to be finished, with the manga creator Suzue Miuchi stating she would like to finish it soon, but hasn't quite figured out when that will be (move over Hunter x Hunter fans). Having been one of the earlier shoujo titles starting back in the mid-70’s the series is full to the brim with pretty much every cliche and trope you can think of for shoujo anime, and to a modern audience it can often be almost hilarious at times to sit through. It is important to remember that for its time Glass Mask was a trend-setter and arguably if not the creator than certainly the reason why a lot of these cliches became cliches in the first place. Over the years Glass Mask has received its fair share of adaptations and even parodies, and currently has 3 different animes as well as a live action drama series and real life stage plays based on it. I heard the most recent anime, the 2005 TMS adaptation of Glass Mask, does a pretty great job at modernizing several aspects of the series, but unfortunately I have yet to watch that to weigh in so all I can say is that I was inundated with more cliches than I could count and laughed a ton while watching the 1984 series and I loved every minute of it. 

Glass Mask is the story of a young 13 year old girl Maya Kitajima, who has a dream to be a great theatre actress. Unfortunately for Maya she’s from a very poor family, and even more unfortunately for her, she is incredibly average looking with no flair--and don’t worry, the anime will remind you of that fact countless times every episode. Despite her damnable curse of “just looking kind of average” Maya will stop at nothing to pursue her dream and eventually runs away from home after getting a scholarship for an acting school. There, the enigmatic Chigusa Tsukikage notices Maya’s talents and takes her on as her protege. Soon, Maya learns that her mentor Tsukikage was once a legendary actress thought to be truly one of the all time greats who due to a tragic Phantom of the Opera style accident had her face hideously scarred and retreated out of the spotlight. 

Tsukikage is looking to pass on her talents to the future generation and eventually pass on her greatest possession, the rights to the elusive Crimson Goddess play--a supposed legendary masterpiece that has not been seen by anyone in decades; not since Tsukikage’s career ruining accident. For some reason the director and creator of the the Crimson Goddess play saw it fit to beseech all the rights to his masterpiece to Tsukikage and thus nobody else has been able to produce this elusive phantom play since. It won’t be easy for Maya and the Tsukikage acting school, as media conglomerate and mega corporation Daito Entertainment will stop at nothing to get the rights to the Crimson Goddess, and isn't afraid to sabotage them at every step of the way. Perhaps Maya’s greatest rival however is the young Ayumi Himekawa, the daughter of an already famous actress who is said to be the favorite to inherit the Crimson Goddess role, and is everything Maya isn't; beautiful, rich, famous and well loved by all, and while not a student of Tsukikage she is more than willing to pass on the rights to Himekawa if Maya fails to prove herself.

It’s easy to already see the cheesiness just from me trying my best to summarize the basic plot, and we haven’t even gotten into the romances yet. Maya’s relationship with the young Yu Sakurakoji is fairly simple at first, as he helped rescue her from a feral dog and despite being in rival acting schools--one affiliated under Daito no less, he’s a pretty chill guy that enjoys spending time with her and doesn't care about all that stuff. It’s only after Maya starts to take off in her career that Sakurakoji starts to spiral into this insane inferiority complex centered around her, where he thinks she has become too good an actress for him to be around anymore and starts to give her the cold shoulder all because of his own make-believe shortcomings. It’s very odd and sudden, and the entire thing is blown out of proportions as Maya clearly does not think that and Sakurakoji eventually has to be lectured by bad boy Masumi of all people to come around and start spending time with Maya again. Even after this however it isn't like the old days anymore and the gap that was created from his own complex still lingers.

And oh boy, don’t get me started on Masumi, he’s quite the character. Masumi Hayami is the 24 year old son of the president of Daito Entertainment and is currently running the corporation in his father’s stead. Masumi serves as both an antagonist and love interest (because of course he can be both) in the early parts of the story and is often behind some (but not all) the sabotage done to Tsukikage’s acting school. Masumi will eventually take a more reasonable approach when it comes to trying to yank the rights of the Crimson Goddess away from Tsukikage’s hands as the anime progresses, often just by having his acting school beating Tsukikage’s students in contest and the like, and it’s here where we usually see Masumi’s employees that work under him being the more underhanded characters instead of Masumi directly engaging in the conflict.

Despite being on different sides, so to speak, Masumi catches one of Maya’s earliest performances, her role as Beth in Little Women, and falls in love with the young girl, impressed by both her potential as an actress and her fortitude for going on with the show despite suffering from a dangerously high fever and immediately being rushed to the doctors after the curtains fall. From this point on her takes the role of “Mr Purple Rose” named for the bouquet of purple roses he sends to her at every show. As her secret admirer and the first fan Maya has ever had he means a lot to her yet as his true identity of Masumi he’s an enemy that Maya cannot stand to breathe the same air as. So in short, Masumi is just your average 24 year old CEO of a mega corporation crushing on a 13 year old girl from a small acting school he is trying to ruin and also her secret admirer. Somehow Masumi is one of the best characters in the series, and is my best boy. Only in shoujo!

So far I've been having some cheap laughs at the expense of the 1984 Glass Mask anime but it’s not all like this. The over-the-top bombardment of old school shoujo cliches and the laughs I got from them may be one of the most memorable component of my viewing but there’s actually a lot more to this anime than that. When you get beyond the silly age gap romances and the flowery melodrama of young teenage love, Glass Mask is a story of artists trying to pursue their passions and dedicating their everything to them. Maya may be cursed to forever be “only average looking” but I really respect her drive to dedicate her entire life to theatre. 

Well, that is to say, the times when she isn't acting like punching bag to the rest of the cast (Glass Mask has a tendency to make Maya into a Cinderella surrounded by tons of wicked stepsisters). When Maya is written not as a Cinderella she’s fiercely determined, and never backs down despite some straight-up abusive behavior she is put through. At times her mentor Tsukikage is absolutely savage, regularly beating Maya and putting her through some training that is definitely highly illegal, at least for today’s standards. For instance she once threw Maya in a shed and locked the door refusing to let her out until she finally understood her character she was assigned. Did I mention it was in the middle of the freezing cold winter and snowing out and Maya only had the clothes on her back for warmth? She was out there for days with no food, water, or even warmth. But don’t worry, she had her script to read and that made it all okay. Like goddamn, somebody call child protective services on this lady.

Speaking about “the art” and everyone’s passions, the more you watch the series the more it becomes obvious that the creator, Suzue Miuchi, really cares for theatre and isn't just using it as a vehicle to propel her own story. There are countless renditions of classic plays shown in Glass Mask, such as the mentioned already Little Women, The Miracle Worker, and Wuthering Heights, just to name a few. Some of these plays are presented without any changes while others may have reinterpretations made to them by the characters who are trying to give their roles a life of their own away from the original source material. Miuchi very much understands theatre and does a great job converting many famous plays into a more compressed and easily digestible form of entertainment that can be viewed on a week by week bases. The analysis characters give about the plays and other characters’ performances, the ways characters interpret their parts, and how the plays that we are privy to see in the series end up all show a deeper understanding of the medium. Watching Glass Mask is almost like taking a beginning course in theatre that covers all the classics, only with way more melodrama and over-the-top romance than you will find in your local theatre group. I hope.

What’s the most impressive however goes beyond just Miuchi’s renditions of other classic works and instead are her own plays that she creates herself. As not only does Glass Mask use pre-existing plays it also has its own original productions that will spring up in-between the real world plays. A lot of these self created plays are very enjoyable too, and some feel way more fleshed out than they have any right to be and you often find yourself regretting that you are only privy to a small part of the performance and not able to just sit there and watch the entire play like the characters in the anime do. Maybe that’s why it shouldn't be too much of a surprise that some of the plays Miuchi has created for her manga have later been adapted into real life plays in Japanese theatres. This is probably the greatest testament to the series’ popularity right there, where its own fictional works are turned real. I can’t think of many examples of something like that happening before.

I’d be remiss not to mention the visual aspect of this series before wrapping up my thoughts on it too. While certainly no powerhouse in animation, Glass Mask 1984 goes for a more picturesque route, and does a great job with tons of beautiful still shots and intricately detailed background images. It’s a humble production but with the right use of lighting a lot of scenes can really shine (pardon the terrible pun it was an accident), especially the night shots which can be pure art. Hang it in a museum, I say. I’m almost surprised we don’t see more “aesthetic” anime blogs mining images from this series. Veteran director Gisaburo Sugii (Dororo, Touch, Osamu Tezuka’s Phoenix) leads the production with skilled marksmanship you would expect from his previous (and future) pedigree, and along with legendary animator the late Shingo Araki (Ashita no Joe, Galaxy Express 999, Saint Seiya) the series has a wonderful 80’s flair to it that just fills any retro anime fan full of nostalgia whether or not they have seen the show before.

Studio Eiken’s 1984 Glass Mask adaptation is a short, briskly paced 22 episode series that is easy on the eyes and not hard at all to still sit through for modern audiences. It’s full of tons of laughs (both ironic and sincere) as well as tons of melodrama and over-the-top romance. Most importantly though, it’s a full of passion; lots and lots of passion. During its short episode count the series watches Maya progress as an actress and grow older, with her finishing middle school and beginning high school while also balancing full time acting jobs on the side. The ending is left open--and let’s face it the manga hasn't even ended some 35 years later still--but there’s enough forward momentum in the series to really feel like your time with the characters wasn't wasted and that they were able to accomplish something--not to mention the ending spot is a pretty decent one leaving the viewer wanting more but enjoying a satisfying conclusion to one of the more interesting story arcs adapted. Overall I think anyone who enjoys cheesy anime romance can sit down with this series and have a fun Valentine’s.

[pjsta]

Ok but a lot of people will never fully understand just how important Ryan having dyspraxia is to me so here's some reasons for you:

- It's a hidden disability most people have never even heard about, so here's to educating them!!

- As people don't know it exists, representation is scarce

- Seriously i knew maybe two characters with dyspraxia before at the most

- and thats out of everything I've ever watched/read

- I don't even remember who one of them is but I'm sure I knew two

- and they dont really get into how it affected the characters either

- I now have a third character to whom I can relate whoooo

- Ryan seems to dislike talking about it bc of the reactions of people around him and honestly often times same

- First things first it is impossible for me, a dyspraxic, to condense the entirety of my dyspraxia down into a 1 minute summary and it often makes people awkwardly go oh... ummm????

- like i have a vague script but do i stick to it? Nope.

- seriously though i love that we got to see how different people react to his dyspraxia bc they were all so real and realistic

- He feels like he's letting his nan down (he's not but i feel this)

- But Grace was amazing and so supportive with him without trying to push so hard that he feels even more like a let down and she told him you already make me proud and im cry bc that is how you support and grace is the best fail to change my mind

- Graeme often treats it like he's using it as an excuse

- remember the "oh you going to blame this on dyspraxia too"

- seriously graeme, f u for that line

- i may think it myself often but it is Not. Cool. to say and it hurts like hell

- also he kinda seemed to treat him like a child sometimes and thats bad enough for neurotypical teenagers but pls dont bc we especially really dont need that

- Yaz knowing about it but not seeming to really know how to treat him??

- she occasionally seemed to think 'how should i treat him in this specific scenario'

- surprise surprise treat him like you would anyone else unless otherwise is said duh

- but i did like her making sure he would be ok with the climbing the ladder bc theres a difference between treating someone differently and actively making sure they're comfortable doing a thing

- (also fyi sloped ladders are mostly alright. Vertical ladders that go very very high can go die)

- yes riding a bike can be a real struggle for us dyspraxics

- if i didnt have the support and practice i did would very likely be in the same boat

- theres a reason why i dont trust myself on a bike on roads

- like yeah nope not a good plan

- ryan obviously not liking this aspect of himself is so relatable bc there're honestly times when i hate it too

- sometimes its just kinda there and other times its like i could really do without this pls go away and to see ryan do the same is just yh same

- i love that he said like despite this im actually a capable person but at the same time i hate it bc i know just what it feels like to know im a capable person but not always feel like it bc i cant always do things like everyone else can

- also!! Representation!!

- ik i said this earlier but the fact that we *actually* get representation for once and in a show as huge as doctor who?? THANK YOU SO SO MUCH!!!!

- im really so so happy about this omg

- also it's dyspraxia foundation's dyspraxia awareness week so it's great timing too

- im so proud of ryan though

- he keeps going and keeps trying and im so proud

- you got this ryan

- i really hope we can maybe explore more of how it affects him

- its a thing that affects everyone differently so it would be good if they can show a massive variation and there's seriously so much they could do with this

- like stuff like messy incomprehensible hand writing bc motor control skills hate us

- falling over bc suddenly all balance has disappeared and centre of gravity does not exist for us so whoops over we go

- balancing on tiptoes bc we know we're just gonna fall over but we're going to feel good doing it

- maybe a bit of how it affected him at school

- like there were times when yaz seemed to remember from when they were kids and hes just different enough for it to be noticeable and not just with coordination difficulties but maybe thats just me seeing these things

- slower processing skills lead to not getting things down enough in the classroom which leads to gaps in our knowledge!!

- I had a slope and a funny cushion at school to try to help my writing and focus?? So little gadgets (fidget cube anyone??) to try to help him

- good time management is not a thing. What do you mean an hour has passed in five minutes or five minutes has taken a year??

- ryan trying to get his thoughts out in a comprehensible order and just ending up in a tangled mess of stammer, words and thoughts that worked in his head but didn't come out right at all and oops but you guys know what i mean right??

- coordination working for a while then suddenly just up and disappearing

- ryan being given instructions and needing them written down all the time bc error 404 short term memory does not exist is a thing and no i cant remember this thing you literally just said what??

- ryan organising sthg in a way that everyone else goes wait what why but to him makes perfect sense

- the evil that is shoelaces

- maybe aversion to extreme tastes?? Bc thats a thing

- Distractions! Distractions! Distractions!

- showing that dyspraxia is not all about being clumsy and coordination there are so many ways in which it can affect us

- also mental health can really be affected by it bc we live in a world not built for us and when people dont believe it exists or dont support us in it very well it can be very damaging

- *something goes wrong*: flail and freeze

So yeah, Ryan being dyspraxic means so much to me

Thank you, Doctor Who

[theroastedpoosqueery-blog]

On johann and tenma dynamic or something

((@jyuanka so yea i wanted to bounce back on what you were saying but its so long i figured i should make a new post lmao ))

There are so many interesting characters in monster (eva being maybe the first one), but the dynamic between tenma and johann is really whats does the deal for me. Their relationship is what builds the plot, like two poles of a battery that supports the entire story ! and they only met four times !! i love that its so unclear why both of them are so intent on having the other in their line of sight, like their obsession with each other is never really explained and we can only have so many speculations. Since its monster, it cant be something like ‘good tenma absolutely want to destroy johann for world peace”/ “evil johann absolutely want to destroy tenma because hes…evil”.

(you said  you wanted to yell about monster so uh im taking advantage of it lol)

For tenma, we first think that all of this it is to prove his innocence. But the narrative voice shows us several times that this is not the case (grimmer who tells him that he should not go so far just to get his name cleared -> close-up on tenma’s face that darkens and tenma who doesnt answer = tenma does not do that to prove his innocence, theres something else). And frankly who would go that far just for that? Tenma realizes very quickly that destroying johan is,,,more than complicated and that he could lost his life at any point. He could go to a remote part of another continent and rebuild a career as a doctor there, under a new identity, if he wanted to (maybe johann wouldnt let him, but the obsession johann has for tenma is something that the latter understood at the end so he wouldnt know that at the beginning of the series). Nor is it because he has a savior syndrome and he absolutely wants to protect people (orrr well a little lol), because tenma doesnt seem to be interested in politics or in social justice at the beginning of the series. What i mean is that, like everyone, he knows that the world is unfair and that folks are dying because of horrible situations and horrible people (idk like because of the mafia, because of capitalists, because of fascists, because of human trafficking, etc). Like, everyone knows that, and some of us react and actually do things like direct actions, lobbies, associations, politics, or even just talk about it. But Tenma really doesnt seem to be that moved or concerned, hes more the type to be like “whatever. Dont see ? hasnt happened”. Yet when he realizes that its johan who does these things, suddenly it becomes his personal business. Like people always say tenma is the “absolute good” and i really, really disagree.

He has spent his life obeying orders from despotic leaders without ever questioning himself once. He was going to marry a girl who told him that all lives are not equal, ffs! yea she says this when tenma began to think that maybe, maybe, theres something wrong with all this so this sentence shocked him. But you cant tell me that the highly horrible personality of eva is something he wasnt aware of before ! and he was alright with that, because then by marrying her he would secure a brilliant career. He saves a rich person instead of a poor turkish husband, and he have to see his crying widow who tries to punch him to realize that maybe what he did wasnt really okay. And he was past his thirties, so its not a question of “the poor baby didnt knew there was inequality in the world and what he was doing was not nice ! “. He knew, and he chose again and again, for most of his life, to please a corrupt man to promote his career and have a good and safe life. So for me tenma is so, so problematic ! Because Tenma is the sort of man who sees what is wrong, but who chooses not to do anything against it. isnt this kind of people the worst ?? and thats why i love him ! and thats why his radical evolution caused by johann (when he saves the boy, then when he chooses to kill him), is so intriguing.

So yea tenma dont want to destroy johann just so people will be safe or for world peace or wtv  BS -because he spent most of his life not caring about that, or caring but not to the point of getting personally involved. I think little johann is what triggers tenma to do something for the first time of his life. He goes from the guy who sees what is wrong but who doesnt feel like he can react so he just goes with the flow and become as horrible as everyone else, making him worse because he knows thats wrong -> to the guy who chooses, to the guy with an agency who decides to react. Little johan makes tenma becoming a person, its his trigger to personhood. And thats why, after his first encounter with johann, tenma become so different. Imo, the real monster is tenma in the beginning of the series - and johann makes him someone who uses his agency, he renders him human !

So 9 years later, when tenma finds out that the trigger of his humanity is actually the very negation of what is human, it goes ‘bam’ in his brain. We can understand why ! During this 9 years, he had the time to inhabit his new role of “a person with an agency” - he seems so calm, so confident and happy. Hes not the guy who knew that everything was wrong but just followed orders and closed his eyes anymore, he has a personhood and uses his newfound humanity to make the world a better place. He has a sense of purpose and realizes what it is that life is worth living (okay im projecting here lmao). Above all, he thinks that the choice he made (to become a person) is ultimately absolutely good. But then he meet johan for a second time, and actually realizes -wait, so me becoming a person can causes bad things ? was i wrong ? should i have stayed how i was before ?

And then we enter what is the core of Monster : we just follow someone who struggles to define what is being human. Before, like i said, tenma wasnt using his personhood. After johann triggers him to become a person, he basically lives a morally ideal life -save people, be a good person, no headaches of ‘what should i do’. The people who could have forced him to make actual difficult choices (his corrupt chief ) were conveniently dead. Then he met adult-johan, and bam ! so many contradictions. suddenly the answer is not that clear anymore. Then he realizes than with personhood comes the obligation to make dubious moral choices. Because for each choice we make, there are negatives consequences and positives ones, and we have to judge when the positives outcomes prevails on the negatives ones without ever being sure. And i think tenma chasing johan is him refusing this existing situation, is him trying to run away from the negatives consequences of becoming a person. Its him on a quest to know if getting access to personhood is absolutely good, a quest to know if his reason of living is legitimate. He cant think that there are not absolutely good choice, that sometimes the good choice can be to kill someone - or to save them, depending on the situation. There isnt absolute anymore : no real monsters, no real good person. We’re just human who struggles to do what we can. Once you have an agency, you have to take decisions. So for tenma, who basically have never taken decisions to construct himself as a person, his johann-hunting is basically that : hes chasing after his own definition of humanity. Whether he would have choose to kill johan or not, at the end, the manga completed the mission : theres no good choice, only choice you think are the best at one point. If he had chosen to kill johan, he would have chosen to kill someone ; if he had chosen to not kill him, he would have chosen to let someone else die. Whats better ? I am not sure. Personally, i think that if i could kill certain people i would do it, while knowing that this people are humans like me, just raised in different circumstances, because my ideas and my buddies’ lives are worth more than the life of the ones who threatens us : thats my answer of humanity. We alas dont get to see tenma’s answer… but anw. Thats my personal interpretation of what johann makes tenma do lol.

For Johann, the reason for his obsession with tenma is even less clear for me. Why johann wants tenma to understand him, to see him, so badly ? What makes tenma so special ? Johan seems to have a daddy complex, because tenma not the first middle-age man to have the dubious pleasure to be the object of johan desire to show “his” world to someone else. General wolf and schuwald both had to loose everything that was dear to them until they only have johann who then betray them deeply. But these two dont seem to catch the “scenery of the doomsday” so dear to johann ; and yet johann appears to be convinced that tenma can (and so that tenma is the one who should kill him). Why is that ? Why tenma is so different than wolfe and schuwald ?

I have numerous ideas but not one that convinced me too much. The first one would be how their first encounter resonates with them both and had the same effect of ‘triggering their humanity’. I already explained why i think johann is tenma’s personhood trigger. I also think tenma is johann’ trigger to humanity. Its kind of simple : tenma is the first one to show him that human could be good. Tenma saves him and risk his career without ulterior motives (or at least material motives, because like i said there were many philosophical and psychological stakes for tenma). For johann, who never knew that humans could be like that because his childhood environment was kind of,,not good, and who is still young enough to be impressionable, it could be enough to be interested in what tenma has to offer if he were to play with him. That plus the fact that he has deep parental issues and tenma is, like he said, a “second father” to him, so maybe he acts like a child would with his dad (in his twisted way), or rather with his god -tenma who creates him, tenma who destroys him. But i think its too emotional for johann.

Other idea : johann, being this prodigy, understand exactly what is tenma situation while saving him and his philosophical questions -lets keep in mind that tenma talks to johan often whil the boy is in a coma. He understands that tenma chooses ultimately *personhood* over everything that could make his life easy. And tenma’s answer is exactly the opposite of johann's way of seeing life, since johann chooses again and again to negate humanity. So he wants to destroy tenma’s philosophy, destroy tenma sense of what is being human : he creates the perfect life for tenma, wait for tenma to be really at ease with his situation, then slowly destroy everything until tenma would be forced to recognize the superiority of johann’ response. I really think johann is prepared to die just to win his mind game with tenma lmao, he’s that much of a sore loser.

Other theory, who dont necessarily conflicts with the others ones, its that johann didnt plan to make tenma this important in his life. He at first intended to do to tenma the same thing he had done to schuwald and wolfe, with maybe more sentiments knowing tenma was his second father and everything. But what changed his plan was tenma reactions. I dont think johann thought that tenma will go all lone ranger in the arizona forest to train to become a killer spy lmao, and when he saw that, he was like ‘oh funny’ (lets keep in mind that during the first half of the series, while he still thinks he was the one in the red rose mansion, johann is basically just playing a nihilistic game and dont put that much valor into anything). Maybe he became attached to him (whatever sort of attachment you headcanon), which was kind of a novelty to him since he didnt have any feelings toward anyone until then -his sister was himself and he was his sister, i dont think johann ever understand that nina was her own person until the end so feelings toward his sister doesnt count- and he was unsettled enough to want to keep tenma at hand. Like each time i see the schuwald arc im lmfao, when johan is all like little devilish smiles and sidelong glances each time he knows (how? no idea, he must have super powers at this point really) tenma is watching him like how much of an act it is ?? theres no reason for johann to do this ‘hihi cant catch me hellooo ;D ;D’ except being a drama queen. Which he is. so yea i cant help but wonder why he is acting this funny towards tenma lol

Or maybe johann never succeeded in negating his own humanity and ultimately couldnt bear to truly erase his own existence at the end, so he wanted someone to remember him to have a chance to live at least once -because johann understood that what makes us be is to make other people witness your existence. Tenma was the ideal candidate he stumbled upon -his sister being out of play since she was himself so not a true external witness and everyone else being too,, afraid of him or too under his charm to do anything.

AAAh so many ideas !! what is sure is that tenma is johann most important person and conversely. And since they met so infrequently the fandom has a highway to imagine other interactions. please people imagine other johan/tenma interactions. please im dying i dont understand these russian fics at all

So anyway sorry for this loooong ass post that nobody is going to read !! i just,,,,,,,,,,love monster,,,,,,,,,so much

[darkgreiga]

Wishes, Dreams, and Memories Chapter 31

Fandom: Rune Factory 4 Rating: T (to be safe) Genre(s): Adventure, Hurt/Comfort Characters: Lest, Dolce, Pico, Amber, Dylas, Leon, Frey, Arthur, Margaret, Forte Summary:  She had a wish to see him again. He had a dream of her last moments. They had their memories of having only each other. The amnesiac Earthmate never knew that by bringing his best friend back wouldn’t make his daily life go back to normal. Nor did he know she was the key to his and his ancestors’ past. Chapters: list Navigation: <<prev   |   next>> Author’s notes: The first chapter of the last arc is here!

Chapter 31 – Calm after the Storm

-Lest’s POV-

After the battle, Kane managed to find us in the castle after he had gone to the cave to escort the Guardians out safely. Frey explained everything to us, about how the Guardian’s corruption could affect even Venti, and we also told everyone about our relation to Ethelberd and Halwell. The news was a surprise to them as much as it was a surprise to me. After all, we don’t even look like the Sechs emperors by the outside and inside.

Two weeks have passed since that day. I can’t tell whether the corruption is completely gone or not, but all I can tell is that Venti is doing a lot better than when the corruption was still at large. Frey isn’t staying in the castle with us anymore, but she still visits us at least once every two days. She still has duties to attend back in the capital, so she can’t stay longer than a few hours.

I’m starting to feel that she is a close sister to me, but on the other side I can still tell that she’s not telling us everything. None of the Guardians or Kane actually paid attention to Frey’s wound back then, expect for Dolly and Pico. She looked like she was aware of something about Frey, but for some reason, she’s keeping it from me. I can’t actually force her to talk about it, but the fact that she’s hiding something from me is bothering me somehow. Why can’t you just talk to me about it if it’s actually bothering you?

-Third Person POV-

“Sweetie, will you stop staring at me?” the sound of his wife snapped Lest out of his trains of thought, realizing that Dolce was standing in front of him.

“Oh, sorry,” Lest shook his head to make sure that he was completely awake before putting his hoe over his shoulder, “Well, I’ll be working in the fields for the time being so let Frey know when she drops by to visit.”

“I will,” Dolce nodded before giving him a peck on the cheek, “Work hard, okay?”

Dolce watched as Lest left for the fields before Pico popped in front of her, “Are you sure about this, Dolly? Shouldn’t you say something about it to him?”

“No,” Pico followed Dolce closely as the two of them headed for the kitchen, “I need to be certain about the facts first. What we’re thinking now is just the conclusion we come into after we looked at her wound.”

“You’re scared, aren’t you milady?” Pico’s words made the Guardian stop her activity, “You know how it feels to lose a family… well, both of us do.”

Dolce let out a sigh as she turned to Pico with a frown, “He’ll know the truth sooner or later. I don’t want him to think that I’m hiding everything from him.”

Pico let out a sigh and smiled, “I think you’re worrying too much, Dolly. A bit more than usual, I guess,” Pico watched her friend working in the kitchen, “I guess I can see how much your love for Lest had changed my Dolly!”

A blush appeared on the Guardian’s face as she continued cooking, “S-Shut up!”

Lest let out a tired sigh before he admired his handiwork on the field, which was completely clean of garbage from the storm two weeks earlier. Crop seeds were planted on the tilled field and they had already been watered. His job on the field was finished and it was time for him to do his work in town.

Just as Lest was putting down his tools at the edge of the field, a scroll fell out from his pocket. He picked up the fallen scroll and the emblem of the Sechs Empire was visible on the scroll’s paper. A frown came to his face as he remembered the scroll’s contents when it was first given to him.

-Flashback-

“So…” Lest spoke up to Arthur and Kane as the three of them were in Arthur’s office, “The empire is requesting me to be the acting emperor?”

“Yes,” Kane nodded as he rolled the scroll he was holding and handed it over to Lest, “Lord Halwell still hasn’t awakened after a week of recovery even after getting help from the best doctors.”

Arthur turned to Lest, “It would be sad to see you go, but I will not force you to go if you wish to stay.”

Lest turned back to Kane, but stared at him for a moment before speaking up, “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

“No, I understand,” Kane responded with a smile, “The higher ups only requested for you because of your relation to Lord Ethelberd, but they never forced me to take you back.”

“Speaking of which,” Arthur interrupted, getting Kane’s attention, “How is the empire doing currently?”

“Much better than when everyone was corrupted, that’s for sure,” Kane replied with a shrug, “Everyone remembers what happened, but they don’t really know why it happened. Other than that, the corruption in the empire seems to have disappeared without a trace.”

“I see,” Arthur nodded in understanding, “If there is anything else we can do to help, please let us know.”

“Of course,” Kane nodded, “My main purpose for coming here is to deliver the scroll, but I’ll tell the higher ups that you can’t take Lord Halwell’s place.”

“Okay, I’ll see you later,” Lest waved the soldier goodbye as he left the office.

-End of Flashback-

“The acting emperor?” Ventuswill asked as Lest showed her the scroll in the dragon room, “Hey, I guess I’m right about you being royalty after all!”

Lest let out a laugh, “Don’t be too proud on it, Venti. You need to remember who my father was.”

“I know,” Ventuswill paused for a moment as she stared at the wall, “Speaking of Ethelberd, I think I recall hearing something when I was still in the forest. I know that I recognize that voice, now I remember that it was him.”

“Wait,” Lest looked at the dragon god in surprise, “You met him in the Forest of Beginnings?”

“Not exactly meeting in person, though,” Ventuswill put her claw under her jaw as she tried recalling the encounter, “I can only hear his voice saying that he won’t surrender until all Earthmates perish.”

“Can he still be alive in there? And corrupting people into doing things they shouldn’t do?” Lest asked.

“No,  that won’t be possible,” Ventuswill shook her head, “Humans can’t stay and live in there for a long period of time. If a person stays there for longer than they should have, their body will soon break into runes. Even so, the soul would still remain in there forever unless there’s a special case that they’re resurrected.”

“Just like what happened to you,” Lest added, “But if his soul is still there, can he do any harm to the world?”

“Hm…” Ventuswill went back to her thoughts, but nothing came into her mind, “I’m not sure, but I think it’s very unlikely.”

“I hope so…” Lest let out a sigh, “This corruption thing just happens to come and go without a reason and a trace. I just wish that there’s a clue somewhere so that we can prevent it in the future…”

“And then, he ran around the house in panic while yelling that there was a deadly scorpion in the house!” Frey and Pico broke out into laughter while Dolce simply chuckled as she sipped on her tea.

The three girls were hanging around at the castle’s balcony with Frey telling stories about the siblings’ daily lives in the past. Two plates of flan were sitting on the table untouched as the three were busy talking. Pico was completely taken into the conversation, but Dolce had noticed that her guest hadn’t touched either her tea or her flan.

There was a single question she had been meaning to ask Frey and her observation prompted her to pop the question right away, “Before we hear more of those stories, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

“Sure, we can talk while you have your flan,” Frey responded as she simply looked at her share of flan.

“Okay,” Dolce took her share of flan, but the scent of her favorite meal suddenly made her feel weird in the stomach, “Ugh…”

“Are you okay Dolly?” Pico saw as Dolce put a hand on her mouth before shaking her head.

“I’m fine…” Dolce uncovered her mouth before taking a spoonful of flan, only have the weird feeling on her stomach come back, “Not again…”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Frey asked worriedly as she took the flan from Dolce’s hands, “You look kind of pale.”

“I’m… okay… ugh…” Dolce quickly rose from her seat and ran inside, heading straight towards the bathroom.

“Is she sick or something?” Frey turned to Pico.

“That would be my best guess…” Pico turned to the barely touched desserts, “Dolly really loves sweets like flan and cakes, but she’s been avoiding them for the past week for some reason.”

“Hm…” Frey tapped her chin as she was thinking, “I don’t think she’s suddenly become bored of eating her favorite dishes…”

“That’s impossible. There’s no way she’s going to give up on her all-you-can-eat cake routine every-” Pico was silenced with a single talisman landing over her mouth.

“You’re saying too much,” Dolce had just returned from the bathroom, but her face told the other two that she wasn’t feeling that much different than before, “Sorry for that interruption.”

“I don’t mind, but I don’t think you look well at all,” Frey replied worriedly, “I’ll tell Lest about your condition when I see him, so why don’t you two just stay home until he gets back?”

Dolce let out a defeated sigh, “That… might be the best…”

Lest let out a tired sigh as he pushed the castle door open while carrying an extra paper bag with him. With Dolce taking her temporary leave from her evening shift, he decided that it might be best for them to eat dinner at home to let her rest at home. With the ingredients in the paper bag put in the kitchen, Lest left for his room to check on Dolce.

Lest had expected the female Guardian to be asleep with Pico watching over her, the scene he saw was Dolce knitting on the bed with a terrified Pico at the edge of the bed, “I’m… home…?”

“Oh, welcome back Sweetie,” Dolce put her knitting aside and greeted Lest with a smile as she approached her, “How was work today?”

“More or less the usual, I guess…” Lest’s attention was focused on Pico as he let Dolce took his backpack off him, “More importantly, what happened to Pico?”

“Just a simple argument between us,” Dolce replied, completely ignoring the fact that Pico was still in the room, “Are you going to prepare dinner tonight?”

“Yeah,” Lest nodded, “I was planning to make your favorite cake today, so-”

“I want… something else, if that’s okay…” the attention of the other two in the room shifted to her, “I want… some fried veggies…”

The room became completely silent with Pico hovering in front of her with the look of disbelief, “Did I hear that right? Dolly, you never liked eating any kind of vegetables!”

“I’m kind of surprised too,” Lest added, “But if that’s what you want, I guess I need to head out to buy the missing ingredients…”

“Alright,” Dolce nodded, “Sorry for the trouble.”

The two watched as Lest left before Pico turned back to Dolce, “Are you sure you’re fine milady? Do you need Jones to check your condition?”

“I’m perfectly fine,” Dolce let out a sigh before she went back to her knitting, “You’re being a lot more stubborn today. Do you want to be wrapped in talismans again?”

“N-No, please don’t do that again to me!”

[cartoonbeatleskilledme]

Hello I'm new to this whole lore thing and it looks REALLY confusing, can you give me a summary of what's happened?

aLRIGHT lads strap in cos this is gonna be long as shit. before i get into this i want to give a disclaimer, theres a 100% chance i’m going to miss at least one thing and i can’t give you a definitive timeline, so i encourage other people to reblog this and add anything i’ve forgotten/overlooked. im gonna put this under a read more, cos like i said, this is gonna be long

so the name “beatles cartoon lore” popped up a little bit after everything started - it was either an anon (as i remember getting an anon using the phrase for the first time that i personally saw it) or @icasms​ used it first, as they’ve stated such. either way, the actual storyline starts before that point. I am 99% sure @beebleborps​ is the root cause of all this, and I wasn’t actually there for the very start, but I was there before everything exploded. I’m not sure exactly what happened before I dove headfirst into the void, but I know that the castle from the first episode was already the main scene, and that Beebs had already been dragged into the cartoon beatles’ universe, was forced into occupying dead George’s body and became a vampire during the process. You see, at the end of the very first episode, the Beatles all die, for no reason. So at this point, there were four ghost Beatles, four dead Beatle bodies, and the characters in play at this point were Beebs, @beatles-fan-13​ , and possibly others. I’m not sure, but I know there were far fewer cartoon beatles blogs back then, and most of them weren’t part of this (at the time) little storyline.

still pre-lore, I made my blog and beeble sent me an ask on how i’d died (see my username for reference) and I detailed that I’d been brought to the cartoon beatles universe by force, had witnessed the cartoon beatles’ final form, and that they’d killed me for it by inviting me to a concert, bringing me backstage, and dismembering me using George’s chin like a knife. Since there were mainly the ghost beatles at this point, that brought more attention to a second set of Living Beatles that were in the castle, which were also keeping beatles-fan-13 stuck in the dungeon. So right now, as far as I remember, it was me, them, and Beeble in the storyline, with two sets of Beatles - ghost Beatles and living, second generation Beatles. These aren’t the Eldritch Beatles, but are instead basically the same characters from the cartoon post episode 1, but crueler. A lot of the characterisation and early inspiration comes from @wtfbeatlescartoon​ , who often points out how needlessly cruel a lot of the Beatles are in the episodes. The lore has mostly spun away into its own beast at this point though. 

so pretty soon after I made my blog, like within a few days, other beatles cartoon blogs began popping up to join in on the fun. around this same time, i’m fairly sure @spookycryptidgeorge​ aka Grey began to get in on the story, and that’s when I got the ask/icasms coined the phrase, “beatles cartoon lore”. (In case you are curious, here is the ask, dated July 8th) Now around here I’m likely going to become more of an unreliable narrator, because a lot of things were happening at once. @cursedbeatlescartoon​ and @crypticbeatlescartoon​ came into inception, with the latter joining the madness of the story, and not long after that, @vampiregeorgeharrison​ and @eldritchgeorgeharrison​ appeared and the eldritch beatles became part of the story. It was also around this time that everything started to get more crazy and everyone was becoming a cryptid/inhuman/etc. The main players at this point that were making most of the threads were me, Grey, George, and Beeble, but the others were also contributing, and I might have missed some other story points.

The story so far here was that it started with Beeble (?) when he was transported to the Transylvanian castle in the first episode by the ghost Beatles, also known as the original Beatles. They were trying to recruit him to join the band, and George was trying to teach him the guitar, but Beebs refused cos they were forcing him into it. Eventually, George shoved Beeble’s ghost into his dead body (the other corpses are still in the same place and haven’t decayed at all) which caused him to forcibly possess George’s corpse, which also became vampiric, probably because he was dead for so long. Beatles-fan-13 was brought to the castle somehow and ended up trapped in the dungeon, was subjected to experimentation, and Beebs was trying to get them back when I became part of the story. I was a ghost which, story-wise, had been wandering the castle, but was mostly tethered to the Beatles and couldn’t go far. I met Beeble first, I believe, and relayed my story, as well as the fact that the second generation Beatles had tethered my spirit to them so that I would preform menial tasks for them, and that one of the experimentation processes they had people undergo was cartoonisation, and that they’d done as such to me, which was a process that allowed someone from outside of the cartoon beatles universe to assume a cartoon form in their universe and switch out of it when leaving. (it was later discovered that only I would need to go through this process, since it was not a Roger Rabbit situation and everyone else turned into a cartoon automatically. I was a special case because of what species I am, which was not known at this point and assumed to be human) Most of our time was spent trying to find the dungeons and get beatles-fan-13 out of there, and at some point they’d stolen some of Beeble’s blood and given it to beatles-fan-13? I’m not entirely clear on if that worked, but I know soon after they became a ghost and now reside in Beeble’s tophat.

When Eldritch George appeared, we all learned that there were an even higher class of beatles, and the second generation beatles were more or less pushed to the side story-wise. The most powerful beatles are the True/Eldritch Beatles, but there were only two True Beatles - John and Paul. They had converted Eldritch George and an (unseen) Eldritch Ringo to become like them, but they weren’t truly like them, which was why they were defecting. the True Beatles were waiting for True George and True Ringo, who at this point have not shown up yet. Soon after Eldritch George appeared, @eldritchpaulmccartney​ , the first True Beatle, came into existence and began to pull the strings. Nobody’s sure exactly what their plan is, but Paul (typically referred to as Luap so as not to “summon” him, in a voldemort-esque situation) revealed that most of the people in the story aren’t human. Me, Serena, was never human to begin with and is instead some sort of powerful being called a Star Child, but events I’m not aware of resulted in me losing my memory and assuming that I was a human. I’m not even actually a ghost, but assume the form and abilities of a ghost because I thought I was dead. Grey was human at some point I believe, but they became corrupted by the True Beatles and the Cartoon Beatles Universe itself, which slowly corrupts anyone who doesn’t belong. Grey has mostly unseen powers/abilities, and so far, True Paul has let slip that he and True John need me and Grey for some sort of ultimate plan because of the power output we can give.Vampire George (separate from Beeble, who is also, somewhat confusingly, a vampiric George in appearance) is typically seen doing True Paul’s bidding and trying to find the full extent of Grey’s abilities and keep me/Serena in check.

Other parts of the story that didn’t really fit into that summary are that icasms can be possessed by a John, not sure which, and she stays away from the castle for that exact purpose. There’s some sort of rune on her arm(?) that allows John to possess her more easily, and keeps other ghosts/beings from being able to take her over. Beeble, after a while of keeping in George’s body, became unstable, and Eldritch George “fixed” this by merging Beeble with George’s ghost, so now only three ghost Beatles roam the castle. Ghost Paul typically hangs around Beeble and will sometimes possess him in order to get attention, though i’m not sure if there are any other reasons for this. More recently, @elemental-icee-cattt​ , some sort of doctor who may or may not be from the cartoon beatles’ universe itself showed up and has been helping keep Grey and me from basically dying, since certain events (like Grey somehow becoming irradiated after being possessed by Vampire George and Eldritch George letting me/Serena read from the book on Star Children in the Eldritch Library) almost led to our deaths and, due to our abilities, possibly the destruction of the castle and/or universe. 

NOW, that’s the story part of the Lore. The other half of the Lore has to do with the Cryptids, which are born from finding screenshots where the animators fucked up and everyone spins a story from it. I already made a post on the origin of the First Cryptid, Glitch John, and there’s a whole blog dedicated to the cryptids that’ll tell you their history, @glitch-john-and-friemds​ . At the mo, there’s Glitch John, Glitch Paul, Glow George, Octoringo, Eyeless John, Supereye John, and I’m sure there are others I’m missing. People who contribute to this part of the lore include @abandonedstage , @404bot , @lenshitposting , @beatles-cartoon-analysis , @constantcascades , @ringodidnothingwrongo , @foolishgrippy , @agesnotyetwritten and anyone else who produces art and fics for it, as I’m sure I’m missing people and I’m sorry if I missed you!!! If you’re curious, yes, the cryptids ARE technically part of the lore story, but none of them have really appeared (aside from a few asks from Glow George) so they don’t play much of a main part.

SO that is a Quick and Probably Incomplete summary of The Lore, and it’s really long but here it is and I hope you can understand it! if i’ve missed anything, again, feel free to reblog this post and add things, and if you have any further questions, just ask beeble or anyone else you see contributing a lot!!! :::)

[perfectionistincrisis]

Day 79

soooooo i went to bed at 8 am in the morning today. Cause i was on the treadmill. with breaks after 30 mins. for a total of 3hrs. so i started at around 3 am and ended around 7 am almost 5 hours for an actual 3hr workout Oh great! 

oh now i put a sticky note on the webcam thingy on my laptop. Lol now ik for sure why almost everyone at uni puts an ugly sticker on it. cause someone might hack into it and stuff. saw it in mr robot. 

oh yesterday we went to a mall and dad had to park and come later after we already entered the mall. so when he was entering he saw some lady lying on the floor having a nose bleed i think. anyways so later in the car he was talking about it and telling how when he saw that he was almost about to call me and then he saw that the ladys like surrounded by more than enough people so theres no need to but then he was like i came to his mind right away. idk what he thinks about me but im sure i havent thought as much about myself for sure lol. hmph. But i wish to live up to his expectations one day inshaAllah. 

so my doctor has been telling me for months now, and once again from my most recent lab investigations results i am supposedly having a very bad bacterial infection. And i have no idea where the hell it is :) so i have to go to the hospital agaaaaaaain to see a nephrologist or urologist after doing an urine culture & bleh not looking forward to it but gta go. maybe tomorrow 

so my mom is really cool. i mean she knows so much about medicine. ‘clinical stuff’. A lot of it. Tbh she knows more than me. ever since year 2 and 3, whenever i find out some interesting clinical management i always ask her about it only with the intention of telling her about it once she didnt know the answer WHICH i only assumed everytime. She mostly answers them right and on top of that i end up learning a thing or two from her esp the medicine names cause like in med school they dont teach us the brand name but the generic name. she knows a lot of brand names too. i mean shes just awesome mashAllah.  Anyways so why im mentioning all these is cause, she freaks out every time my results are out and the doctor goes like i have a bacterial infection. So from urine analysis. Normal level of ‘pus cells’ should be ZERO to 4. Even SIX pus cells means infection and i have like around 26 Pus Cells. Oh Holy

So after hearing that mom who id expect to not say silly things comes up with all weird theories Ughh! she tells about how im so dirty and i dont wash my water flask so it has lipstick stains on it and maybe thats where i got infected from “-” AND once i laughed it off she suggests maybe its from all the ‘burgers’ i eat from outside “-” “-” and how the fast food chains dont maintain hygiene and all Ughh. 

Btw ik my posts are usually really long and all but then its actually funny sometimes. I mean i hardly write anything. There is just SOOOO much stuck in me. i mean you can say i write 1% of it. And if you think im just bluffing, ill raise it to a 3%. But if i say i write even 10% of whats in my head then Ill call myself a liar! See, the thing is. I dont like talking to anyone about these. “except” for him. And that is because i ‘chose’ to. Like its not that i dont have people to talk to, more like i dont even need people to talk to. Cause i dont want to. Its just me ‘wanting’ to open up to him. to trust him. to let him be a part of my life. What im trying to say is. The reason i have so much stuck in me is not because i cant talk to anyone but more like i dont want to. And theres just one person I want to talk to with. Other than that, I find more comfort in my own company rather compared to anyone elses tbh. 

Now i remember in one of my post i was talking about our last conv where he told me to wait for him and he’ll come for me one day inshaAllah and i was talking about idk how much i can do with regards to that to make things easier for us! Idk i think theres more to what i can do. I keep thinking about it and, i believe that i need to be stable and successful enough too. And not just simply stable financially but like, I need to be at good place. A marriage is a two person thing and you always need to lift each other up as much as you can.

One way or the other, this thing always just slips whenever i sit to blog but it entered my head and scared the shit out of me quite a few days ago. So i was thinking of us, life.. Btw when i say ‘life’ it still means ‘us’. Its the same god damn thing “-” Aha! So i was thinking about us, and how times passing by. i really cant say if its going fast or slow. so no comments. i honestly dont know! BUT i feel like there is so much to come yet. i mean.. and then i was thinking.. i mean some day itll be the 100th day. cool And then months will pass. AND suddenly it hit me! NOW if theres some month i really wna skip, like s.k.i.p. like God, can you like pause my life or like fast forward it to the next month or something please? THEN, that would be January! Yesssss. Like, i totally have no. freakin. idea. how ill spend that month. Im like -blank- Like idk how ill be breathing in peace. its that much of a killer for me. im not even exaggerating, idk if it sounds stupid but then maybe i am stupid Ugh. But like honestly, im more okay with feb, than i am with jan. i really have no idea what ill do or how ill pass the time :) 

Ill talk more about it prolly tomorrow. but enough for today i guess! 

OH ANDDDDD - “I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”  ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ I read that in one of his posts & words cant say what it pulled me out of... Tada b’bye c:

[wgfjmj758-blog]

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