#even though it’s a few months old

[bbqphantom]

MUPPET BEATLES :)

[slfcare]

the most difficult thing about growing as a person socially, as in getting out of your shell and noticing that you are, is that there will still be times when it doesn’t feel like you’ve grown at all! times when you can’t really connect with anyone around you, times when you fail to enter into an existing conversation, times when you say the wrong thing (or nothing at all when in hindsight you probably should’ve). but that’s also kind of the best thing, because that’s the thing that helps you realize that sometimes, it’s not you or your lack of skills or any shortcoming. sometimes certain environments just aren’t for you and certain people aren’t your people, and that’s okay. that’s human. it’s okay to not feel the progress you have made all the time.

[airoarts]

Leader and deputy

[Image description: a digital painting of Squirrelstar and Ivypool from Warriors. Squirrelstar is a small dark red cat with green eyes, standing in front of the much taller Ivypool, a gray tabby-and-white cat with blue eyes and many battle scars. The background is dark blue. end ID]

[melvincholy]

old low resolution art of creacher guy

[gumy-shark]

on one hand never trust how you feel about yourself as a person after the sun goes down, especially if you have a known pattern of catastrophizing your own behavior into you somehow being a secretly evil Bad Person. on the other hand night time is when i do my best introspection

[icewindandboringhorror]

sneeping with his legs up over his head for some reason... weird boye

[ferociouslycreativemystery]

Picture if you will:

You are 14 years old, and like the rest of your class you are very, very happy today, because today you and your entire year (60-ish students) are not having any classes for the afternoon. No, you are travelling downtown, because there's a movie festival underway, and you've all been invited to watch a movie at an old cinema! Wahoo!

So you and your teachers get on public transport and make your way to the venue. It's a lovely sunny day, a slight chill in the air, and while you wait on the pedestrianised street outside between the rows of fancy old houses, your language teacher tells you about the origins of the literary quotes that are emblazoned all long this stretch of road. Apparently people have been complaining that the metallic letters become a slipping hazard when the streets freeze over in winter. Eventually, you are let through to the lobby.

The place is clearly old—in the classy way. It's not huge, but large at a sort of human scale. The auditorium looks more like an actual theatre than a cinema, courtesy of the floor being quite flat, with the dramatically arched ceiling towering at least three stories above your head. There appear to be balconies of additional seating stretching along either side of the deep room, though as it turns out they will remain empty on this occasion. You students seem to be almost the only ones in attendance.

Your school has plenty of room to spread out even just keeping to the ground floor. Friends group together in clusters with plenty of seats to spare between them, as you all sink onto the red velvet cushions. The backrests have dark wooden frames around the edges of the padding. You manage to get a place near the edge of a middling row, alongside your friends and only a few seats away from the aforementioned teacher. Even she, who spent much of her '70s youth in Paris, and who can be quite particular, comments on how nice the venue is.

There is a small strip of stage poking out just below the large silver screen, which is stretched up inside the frame of a heavy pair of red stage curtains, that have already been drawn apart. Silence falls as a presenter walks up to a podium on the stage. He informs you all that the movie you are about to watch is Italian, and that its director has flown over to be in the room with you for today's screening. This is his first film. He will be staying for a short interview as well as taking questions from the audience after the viewing is complete. So, without further ado: let's get on with the movie!

Clearly they are hoping this experience will make an impression and awaken the young audience's curiosity about films and filmmaking. And it really will be making an impression, because somewhere along the line, the communication between the organisers and the students now making up the vast majority of their audience has broken down. The teenagers have no idea what movie they are about to watch.

It's a film called Short Skin, a name that you are unlikely to forget in the coming decade or so. It revolves around a 17 year old boy with a medical condition called phimosis: a thickening of the foreskin which means it cannot stretch, preventing him from getting an erection without experiencing significant discomfort and pain. This, of course, takes a heavy toll on his relationships with girls his own age and his masculinity.

This is the movie that you will be spending the next hour and a half watching with your classmates in this spectacular cinema.

It goes just about as well as you might expect. As the story plays out, there are some fairly standard awkward teenage scenes, some budding romances held back by all the age-typical angst, and plenty of full nudity shots that get incredulous reactions in the room. Of course there's a general sniggering. A fair amount of half-scandalized, half-titillated exchanges in low voices between all-amazed friends up and down the many rows of seats. Apart from the ones who are staying as silent as mice, perhaps in the hopes that this will prevent them from associating with whatever is going on right here, right now. But what none of you can do is anticipate what is… about to come.

In their quest to become men this summer, the boy and his friend catch an octopus at the beach. He brings it home and washes it in the bathroom sink. This is when everyone collectively remembers a conversation from earlier in the film, where his friend was making some bold claims about the origins of the American word for figa. He's thinking about it. A close-up shows the tip actually touching it, then the front door slams and he quickly shoves the octopus back in its plastic bag. He brings it down to the kitchen—presumably to be disposed of after he has greeted his family. In the next scene, he arrives at dinner to find his mother and sister enjoying seafood.

He asks for the bread basket.

But we are not done! Oh, no no no no. He goes out, buys another octopus, brings it home to the same bathroom. In a sustained shot, from the level of his bare buttocks, hands holding the tentacles tightly wrapped around his hips, and his face and torso clearly visible in the mirror:

He fucks the octopussy.

When he is (finally) done, we hold on the following shot for long enough to permanently sear it into your memory:

You have half the movie left to go.

The audience has no questions for the director when the film is done. The teacher, who spent the entire movie making loudish mortified exclamations, says that if she'd known what movie you were invited to watch, she would have probably asked if they had another option.

I still got an afternoon off from lessons though, and a pretty good story to tell out of it as well, so I wasn't complaining.

[cappurrccino]

i was gonna say "i shouldn't have to go to work when my brain feels like a depression slushie" and then i was like "wait but then i'd basically never ever go to work" and i'm actually doubling down on the first part now bc my god how am i supposed to heal my brain from burning out 5 years ago if i can never get an actual break

[heyclickadee]

My dad, picking something off the floor: It’s a bobby pin.

Me: Yes.

My dad: I thought you didn’t use these any more!

Me: I don’t.

My dad: They only turn up when you’re around!

Me: Hmm.

My dad: Are you summoning them??!??

[arts-i-enjoy]

AHHHHHH

[cosmicrot]

I keep thinking about the fact I'll be able to do my consult finally for top surgery [or well more akin to a radical reduction] and i've been reading tons of stuff and looking for photos for reference and god

so many posts like "unexplained back pain and severe headaches magically gone after top surgery/reduction" and i'm like GOD I can't wait for that to be me

but i.. i might not even be able to get the surgery because my parents aren't supportive and i'm disabled... so I'm going to have to somehow magically get the money for a hotel for 2 weeks until I get my drains out, so my friend from out of state can take care of me in the hotel :')) I still am desperately trying to save up for braces and am only half way there it turns out [we love being bad at math! I thought I was like 3/4th the way there if not slightly more] so it just... seems less and less likely that it'll ever happen.

[shummthechumm]

reapplied to a separate position at a dream job manifesting good things

[girlkomaeda]

watched the no.6 anime thought it was kinda bad in a fascinating way so i read the manga and it was actually so good it made me feel crazy now I am currently working on reading the light novels....

[astrangeghost]

Trying to give this doll a boiled water and cold water treatment(is it called a boil wash?? I watch dollightful all the time but just can't remember fsjfsjjd) in an attempt to at least give her wavy hair ^_^

[roaringroa]

they should make a life where you don't have appointments, work, school and scheduled events every single day for months on end

[icewindandboringhorror]

boy in silly sitting positions compilation