#got this one over like 5 years ago at least she just lives in my closet | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

da-rulah · 10 months ago

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The Mayor's Daughter - Mary Goore x f!Reader [Part 4]

Summary: Mary can't think straight; at least, not about anything but you. He's angry, and he's hurt - rightly so - but he can't help the feeling that he's missing something. His spider senses are tingling, and his saviour complex is nagging in his head...

Meanwhile, you're dragged to a formal dinner at the Town Hall with your father's sleazy political associates. What could possibly go wrong?

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Word Count: 13.6k

Warnings: Angst, childhood memories/trauma, alcoholism, addiction, minor drug use, creepy men being creepy, unwanted physical touch/harassment, abandonment, panic attacks

ALSO AVAILABLE ON AO3 | MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

A/N: Once again, a huge thank you to @her-satanic-wiles & @angellayercake for workshopping and beta reading this fic with me! I live for their reactions every time I sent them an idea or a draft... 🤭 This chapter got away from me, as so many do, and ending up pretty damn long... Enjoy!

He had to be quick. Any longer, and he might be chased out. But he couldn’t help himself... he wanted to look, to touch...

“HEY!” A gruff male voice shouted from somewhere behind him. Mary startled, stumbling back and shoving his hands in his pockets. “These are for people who know what they’re doing, not little hooligans!”

The store clerk came rushing over, coming in between Mary and the beautiful Gibson Les Paul on display, hung up on the wall amongst the others. The body shone in a stunning hue of deep red wood, orange bursting from the fret board. He’d always dreamt of owning a guitar like this – or any at all. He just wanted to pick one up, to learn, to play.

“S-sorry mister... I didn’t mean to-”

“Go on, out with you! Comin’ in here every damn day, gettin’ in the way of my customers. Go on, get!” The old man shooed a 10-year-old Mary out of the store, shutting the door in his face and folding his arms behind the glass, watching until Mary finally sagged his little shoulders and sighed to himself, trudging down the sidewalk with his head hung low.

Other people were allowed in to look at the guitars, to touch them, test them; why wasn’t he? Sure, he knew he was a kid but he wasn’t a bad kid... He knew he could never afford a guitar like that Les Paul, but oh how he dreamed of owning his own guitar. Just a little acoustic thing to practise on. He'd put in the work, he’d swear it. He just wanted to learn.

Still, Mary headed home with his hands in his pockets and his head hung low, avoiding the eyes of the adults around town who looked down on him with looks of either disgust or pity; he was never sure which was worse.

“Mom?” he called out as he walked into the small and run-down little apartment block on the edge of town. They’d had to move in here almost a six months ago after his father left, unable to afford much else on his mother’s salary; her job at the local diner didn’t pay well.

Music from the radio filtered through the hall, along with the smell of yesterday’s spaghetti being reheated on the stove. “In here, baby,” a weak shout came from the kitchen. She sounded weaker with each week that passed, barely eating and drinking far too much to be considered healthy at all. Mary had spotted that, not totally understanding the ramifications of it at his tender age but he was wiser beyond most 10-year-old’s years. That’s the thing about a shitty childhood; you grow up quick.

Still, he was grateful his father was out of the picture now. Honestly? The lesser of two evils. It was better him gone than be here still, hurting everybody around him.

Mary headed into the kitchen, sitting down at the small table for the two of them and waiting patiently as his mum stirred the pot over the stove, her back to him. He watched as her left hand lifted a glass from beside the stove; a wine glass, half-filled with the cheapest red on the market.

“Good day?” she asked, looking briefly over her shoulder. Mary just shrugged; he hadn’t paid much attention in school, and he didn’t want to tell her about being chased out of the music store. Although he wasn’t sure what he’d done to get kicked out, he still lived under the assumption it was somehow his fault.

His mother hummed along to the radio as she heated their food, taking gulps of the wine to her left and refilling it before plating up two small bowls of food – hers noticeably smaller – and sitting opposite Mary as she placed them down.

“Thank you,” he smiled at her shyly, never forgetting his manners as he tucked into his meal. His mother smiled fondly at her boy, twirling her fork in the pasta noodles as she sipped her wine. The radio played to fill the silence, songs from another decade that had his mother reminiscing over happier years.

As he chewed, he thought back to that guitar, how he’d do anything to have one like that. But he’d settle for a smaller, cheaper, second-hand one. He’d be delighted with one. He just wanted to learn how to play, and then maybe one day, his mom could hum along to his songs on her radio.

“Ma, I think I know what I want for my birthday...”

“Oh? Well good! I was wondering when you’d give me some ideas,” she smiled. Mary hesitated, chewing his lip. Was he asking for too much? Perhaps, but he had to try at least. “Come on, baby, what is it?”

“Well... can I get a guitar? Not like, an expensive one or anything... Just second-hand or something. I wanna learn to play, Ma. I think I’d get real good at it!” he rambled, his excitement barely contained as he thought about how people might change how they saw him if he could prove he was good at something, that he could work hard and prove himself.

His mother’s smile faltered, fading as she dropped her fork against her bowl and grabbed her wine glass, finishing the rest of it off and pouring herself another hefty glass.

“Baby, guitars aren’t cheap, even the second-hand ones...” she began, her voice quiet and full of regret.

“No, I know, but I thought, maybe if I could get a job somewhere, I could mow lawns or something, maybe help Mr Rogers at the carpenters or get a paper route, then maybe I could-”

“Baby you’re ten years old, you should just be a kid as long as you can,” she smiled sadly, her eyes betraying her as they glassed over with tears. It broke her heart to see her little boy so desperate to be a man, to help her, to help pay for his own damn birthday present.

“I... I can still be a kid, I just thought I could help?” he questioned.

“I just don’t think I can afford it baby...” Mary’s shoulders slumped, his own fork dropping into his bowl as he sat back against the chair in defeat.

“Could you stop buying wine for a little, Ma? I just really want a guitar... And then you can get more again. Just for a bit, I promise!”

If her heart wasn’t already breaking for her little boy, it did then. The guilt rose like bile in her throat, her eyes staring at the bottle on the table, her glass emptied again and the taste lingering on her tongue. She’d had her own selfishness reflected back at her, a mirror held up to the truth; the truth being that her lips were stained with the red of her addiction, paired with her sunken eyes, bearing the weight of her sorrow.

She should try, she thought to herself. For him, for her little Mary. He never asked her for anything, and the one thing he wants in the world for his birthday was a crummy little second-hand guitar? She should be able to give him that; as a mother, she wanted to give him the world. He certainly deserved it after all he’d been through.

“I-I’ll... I’ll try, Mary. I’ll really try,” her voice cracked, swallowing the guilt down and forcing the tears to recede. Mary nodded to himself, looking down into his bowl and back to hers that even untouched, still had less in than his half-eaten leftovers.

He stood up, the bowl in his hands and placed it down in front of her. She needed to eat more, he thought.

“Oh, baby no, it’s okay. You should ea-”

“I’m not that hungry, Ma. Please take it.”

She stopped protesting, nodding as she held a shaking hand out to hold his cheek, stroking her thumb over the pudge he was yet to grow out of with a gentle smile.

“Thank you, angel,” she told him, pressing a wine-stained kiss to his forehead. “I promise, I’ll try harder.”

Deft fingers plucked at the strings of a battered old acoustic guitar. The wood was splintering where the neck met the body, the varnish worn down in places that hands would dance over as it had been played to within an inch of its life. Stickers littered the body, hiding nicks and damages from over the years but they too were beginning to wear down to white patches of nothing.

Still, she sang like a dream the way she always had. Mary’s skilled hands worked her strings mindlessly, drifting from riffs he’d learned of his favourite bands over the years to riffs of his own he’d written – the most recent sounding much more melancholy than he’d anticipated.

Sitting in his dimly lit studio apartment, he reclined against the wall at the head of his bed with his first guitar in his lap. His intention had been to drift off into his own world, to write some riffs for songs he could present to the guys and form into tracks for upcoming shows, but he’d been unable to focus, his fingers working on muscle memory alone as his head drifted to the same thing he’d thought of for the last few days.

He’d had time to calm down, for the fog of anger to dissipate and now he’d entered the reflection stage. The anger morphed into hurt, reminded once again that no matter if you wanted him or not, you still were ashamed to be seen with him. He didn’t fit your image, his mere existence in your life was inconvenient and a black stain on your pristine white image.

He wondered if cleaning himself up was an option for a brief moment. What if he didn’t paint his face? What if he wore a shirt instead of his cut off band tees? What if he styled his hair different? All the ‘what if’s swam around his head, but they’d be lies. Mary was many things, but never a phony. He refused to bow down to public opinion and become one of the masses if it meant sacrificing everything that was genuinely him.

He decided he’d rather be hated for who he was, than adored for something he wasn’t. Which is exactly the life you were living.

You’d chosen a world where people loved you, fell at your feet to be known by you and yet somewhere along the way, you’d sacrificed whoever you truly were, covered it up with bows and frills and shiny trinkets. He almost felt sorry for you.

Still, he couldn’t swallow the nagging feeling that he’d done something wrong, that he was letting you slip through his fingers. He wasn’t dumb; Mary knew there was more to you than this image. He’d seen glimpses of it, this vulnerable yet feisty woman clawing at you from inside. Frankly, you drove him crazy. He'd never wanted anything for himself so badly in his life, except maybe the guitar in his hands. He couldn’t lay his eyes on you without wanting you; perhaps up until recently, he thought that was simply physical attraction, a need to take you and have you both coming undone together.

But the way you plagued his mind, how he thought of you during the smallest moments of peace to himself... he was beginning to understand he’d formed a kind of connection with you he couldn’t begin to explain. But he was starting to recognise a feeling within himself that stung like rubbing alcohol on a wound, a feeling that shot him right back to his childhood, to a place so painful he’d shoved it down and ignored it for years.

Before he could go down that route, his shook his head to rid the memories and lay his guitar gently beside him, reaching for his smokes on his nightstand. Lighting one up with his zippo lighter, he rested himself back against the wall, swiping a hand down his face in exasperation. He’d spent too long on this, too many moments infiltrated by thoughts of you.

If Mary was being honest with himself, he only had to ask himself one simple question; were you worth compromising everything he knew about himself? Were you worth him changing himself, becoming something he wasn’t so he could be ‘acceptable’ in your world?

No.

Because that was a world that would only ever see him as a delinquent. They had when he was a child, a teenager and now into adulthood. The second they’d known who his father was, who his mother was, they’d judged him. That would never change, so why should he?

The town hall ballroom was the last fucking place you wanted to be at any given moment, let alone when it was filled with governors, police chiefs, politicians and seedy businessmen. If you’d had your way, you’d have stayed tucked up in bed, like you’d spent most of your spare time in the last week or so since the Bicentennial fair. Facing reality was something you’d tried to avoid, but that wasn’t going to be possible for Daddy’s big dinner party for all the town’s biggest officials.

No, you were to be paraded like a shiny trophy daughter tonight, mingling with the rich and seedy underbelly of your father’s political career. These people made your stomach turn and your skin crawl. You observed them from the corner of the room, a glass of prosecco in a hand covered by white satin gloves to the elbow, in a fancy, floor-length, glittered evening dress of the same pale peach colouring as the bubbly. Your mother had picked the outfit, “elegance with a touch of sparkle” she had said.

Watching them mingle and chatter away, you could barely help the expression on your face turning to one of vague disgust. Your father made his way around the room, shaking hands and rubbing shoulders with the elite while your mother followed in tow, laughing at all the jokes she must have heard a thousand times over the years and nattering with the wives in the room about the latest gossip.

Shallow; all of this was so fucking shallow. But the worst part? This was your future. Your mother... her life was the future your father had paved for you, expected you to walk. You couldn’t think of anything worse.

“Pumpkin! Come and say hello to Mr. Nelson,” you father flagged you down from your inner monologue of disapproval, notably stood with an old man you recognised as the town’s previous Mayor. Mr. Nelson had handed the title over to your dad when you were little, staying a consistent advisor in the governing of the town’s affairs ever since his retirement six years ago.

You’d never liked him. There was something untoward about him, sleazy and manipulative; but that’s politicians for you.

You knocked back the rest of your prosecco glass for a bit of liquid encouragement and walked towards them with your prettiest fake smile on.

“Good evening, Mr. Nelson,” you said, taking his outstretched hand to shake.

“Good evening, my dear!” He didn’t let go of your hand like you’d expected, instead tightening his grip and pulling you to lean forwards so he could press a whiskered kiss to your cheek – or what was actually closer to the corner of your lips. When he leaned back, he winked at you, still keeping hold of your hand to lift it, unashamedly scanning his eyes over your body in your dress and twirling you like a doll on a music box. “My, my... how you’ve grown, hm?”

Your eyes locked onto your father, who was smiling at you fondly as if there wasn’t a problem. You, however, were exceedingly uncomfortable. You looked back to Mr. Nelson, smiling and acting the part. Honestly, you’d always wondered if acting would be a good career for you; you did it often enough.

“Quite the beautiful young lady these days,” Mr. Nelson commented, letting go of your hand and coming to stand beside you, a hand resting on the small of your back as he turned to speak to your father.

“She gets all that from her mother, of course,” he smiled proudly, squeezing the shoulders of your mother beside him, who swatted him with her own gloved hand.

“Oh, stop it, you charmer,” she laughed. You recoiled from the interaction, uncomfortable that there was still a hand on you at all, let alone on the small of your back.

“Your father was telling us about your college days; quite impressive, my dear!” Mr. Nelson said, his hand patting just above the curve of your behind.

“Y-yeah... I mean, thank you, sir,” you smiled graciously. How could you get out of this?

“Now, if only we could find her a nice man to settle down with,” your father joked, your mother smiling along with him as Mr. Nelson chuckled.

“I’m sure that won’t be difficult, hm? Plenty of fine men about town. Any catch your eye?” he asked, looking down at you with a raised white eyebrow.

Instantly, your mind flew to Mary. Certainly, he was not the kind of ‘fine man’ Mr. Nelson or your father would envision for you; in fact, you’re sure they would recoil in horror, but you couldn’t help but think of him. Any opportunity for your brain to remind you of how painfully you’d fucked that up, it would take.

You took too long to answer, head full of Mary as it so often was.

“Pumpkin, Mr. Nelson asked you a question,” he insisted with an expectant nod of his head.

“Oh, not to worry. She clearly has somebody in mind, if the mere mention of a man has her daydreaming about him, hm?” he chortled, his hand now slipping lower to pat at the curve of your backside. Instinctively you jumped forward half a step to get away from the unwanted contact, head whipping to your father in the hope he’d seen that, that he’d step in and defend you. But of course, he didn’t.

“Pumpkin? What’s gotten into you, hm?” His glare was disapproving, his eyebrow quirking as he waited for your answer, but an awkward silence fell on the four of you instead.

“I, um... I’m so sorry, I think I lost my balance. These, uh, damn heels, that’s all,” you laughed nervously, averting the eyes of everyone around you.

“Perhaps a little too much bubbly,” Mr. Nelson accused, tipping his head towards your empty flute in your hand.

“Y-yes, maybe... Perhaps I need some air. Would you excuse me?”

You were turning and leaving before your father could stop you, shoving the glass in your hand onto the tray of a waiter on your way to the door, ignoring the calls of “pumpkin!” behind you, sounding aggravated and embarrassed. Heads turned to watch you leave but you couldn’t look at them, overwhelmed and uncomfortable. You just had to get out.

You headed directly for your father’s office, a small and private space to collect yourself before inevitably having to go back to the ballroom sooner rather than later, lest your father come looking for you.

Finally alone and in a quiet spot, you slumped into your father’s chair behind his desk, spinning absentmindedly from side to side guided by your stiletto on the ground. You focussed on breathing, helping to subside the panic that had risen in you. Bad enough you’d been forced to come to this thing, let alone subjected to the wandering hands of a man who’d known you since you were barely out of diapers. This evening was the nightmare you’d expected it to be.

Looking around your father’s office, it hadn’t changed much. The American flag stuck in his pen cup, the portrait of President George Washington on the wall, the photo frame on his desk that housed a very official looking family portrait taken when you were still in middle school.

This was your life. This façade of pomp and circumstance, governed by sleazy men and dodgy business deals... this was all you could see for yourself. No wonder you were clinging onto Mary by your perfectly manicured fingernails, allowing him back in so easily whenever there was room in your mind. He was the antithesis of that horrendous life already mapped out for you. He was the embodiment of freedom to you, someone that lived their life governed by them and them alone.

He liked dark things, heavy music, grungy clothes. He didn’t restrict himself, lived freely, chasing the dreams he so obviously strived for. He didn’t care what people thought of him, he lived his truth.

You wished you could live like that.

Lost to your musings and memories of brief encounters with Mary, you startled at the sound of the door to your father’s office slamming shut, with him stood before it. He’d come alone, his arms folded over his chest in his crisp tuxedo, and a hardened look of fury in his features.

Your stomach dropped and you sat upright immediately; this wasn’t going to be pretty.

“What the hell was that?” he asked, his voice just above a whisper and yet spat through clenched teeth.

“Daddy, I just... Mr. Nelson, he-”

“Don’t you ‘daddy’ me. Do you realise how embarrassing that was for your mother and I?” he scolded. You swallowed your words, thrown right back to being told off as a child. “Mr. Nelson thinks you were drunk. Are you?”

“No, daddy, I swear!” you protested, having only drank two glasses... on an empty stomach and faster than a shot of your favourite flavour schnapps.

“Then explain why you were so damn rude to him, hm?” he raised his voice, stepping towards you and leaning down on his own desk by his palms.

“He put his hands on me! He’s a creep, dad!” you matched his volume, defending yourself. Your dad just scoffed at you, shaking his head in disbelief.

“He’s a respected member of this community. One bad word from him, and this could all be over for us. My career, our way of life, everything! Do you understand that?” he shouted. How silly of you to think your own father might take your side when one of his creep associates lay a finger on you.

“It was a knee-jerk reaction, he touched my ass dad, like some fucking pervert!” you yelled back, standing from his chair and finding the guts to finally answer back, to fight for what was right instead of pander to him. Mary would be proud.

“You watch your mouth, young lady. I am your father-”

“YES! YOU ARE! And as my father, I thought you might stand up for me, oh, I don’t know, maybe be disgusted when some old man lays a hand on your daughter’s ass!”

Your father lifted an accusatory finger at you, wagging it in your face as if scolding a bad dog. “He was talking to you about your future. A future that he can take away with a snap of his fingers.” He demonstrated with the hand he waved wildly in front of you. “You’re lucky your mother has such a way with words...”

“You mean she’s a good liar,” you laughed humourlessly. “Suppose you have to be in this kind of life...” His face paled, his eyes darkening and appearing to sink further into his skull as he stood up straight, his brow furrowing.

“I have worked for over two decades to build us ‘this life’,” his voice deepened, darkening considerably as he loomed over you. “Look around you. Do you think this just happens? I have done nothing but provide for you, you ungrateful little girl.”

“This is the problem... I’m not a little girl anymore, and you still treat me like I can’t think for myself. I’ve got my own mind, things that I want to do. Do you give a shit about that at all?” The anger inside you you’d caged up for too long was surfacing, the heat on that simmering pot turning up with every word out of your father’s mouth. Already you were too far gone to reel it back in. Whether he liked it or not, he was going to hear this.

“I give a shit about this family!” he screamed. “I will not allow you to tear it all down in some childish tantrum!”

“Tear what down?!” you protested, “I just want to be able to do something for myself for a change, to start my life! It’s got nothing to do with your prestige as Mayor, I just want to be able to finally crawl out from under your shadow!"

Your father ignored you completely, still only seeing the pigtailed little girl from the portrait on his desk standing in front of him. He had no idea she’d grown up before his very eyes. He’d blinked and missed it, too damn focussed on his own career and image to notice.

“You selfish little brat. You don’t get it, do you?” he sneered, “This is MY TOWN! MY LEGACY! You will live by MY RULES!”

And truthfully, that was all it was ever going to boil down to. His fucking legacy.

You sagged your shoulders in defeat, tears begging to fall out of anger. Everything you thought your dad still believed, he’d proven to you in just a few minutes; you were still a child to him, and his legacy was more important than your own happiness. Nothing you could say would win this fight. Nothing would make him see how badly he was hurting you.

You took a deep breath, composing yourself to speak a little calmer, more collected. With emotions heightened, it was easy to yell and scream back at him, to get carried away but you were determined to show him this was not some ‘tantrum’. You meant this.

“What if I don’t want to do that anymore?” you asked, staring him straight in the eye. The air seemed to thicken around you as you waited for it to soak in, for him to hear you, process, and respond. The silence was suffocating.

“I’m sorry?” he asked, turning his head to present his ear as if he hadn’t heard you, but he most certainly had. He just wanted you to repeat yourself, testing you, warning you; did you have the balls to say it again?

“What if... I don’t want to live by your rules anymore?” You spoke calmly, methodically. You will listen, you thought to yourself.

Your father straightened up again, his head twitching as he tidied up his cuff links, straightened his bow tie and slicked back his hair before he gave you the time of day. This was just a part of his intimidation, his macho technique, reminding you he was a distinguished man, one with power. When he finally looked you in the eye again, his face was set in stone.

“Then you can get the hell out of my office.”

Like a punch to the gut, it knocked the wind right out of you. He wanted you to leave.

“F-fine...” you stuttered, walking around the desk as if to head for the door, pulling your cell phone out of your clutch, “I’ll get one of your lap dogs to take me home, and we’ll talk about this in the morning,” you told him, trying to keep a modicum of dignity, prove to him you were an adult and taking the moral high ground. But your father laughed...

“I don’t think you heard me. Perhaps you didn’t understand...” he turned around to face you, now stood by the door to his office. “This is my town, Pumpkin. This whole town is my office.”

The weight of what he was saying fell like a barrel of hot tar over you, the scorching, searing pain radiating through you. You stared in disbelief, waiting for him to laugh, to tell you he was kidding, just pushing your buttons to see your reaction but nothing... He just stared at you, as you stared at him, like a deer in headlights.

“Y-you’re not serious...?” you dared to whisper, shaking your head in denial.

“Deadly. Get out,” he growled, “or do I have to call security?”

Those angry tears turned into streams now falling down your cheeks silently while you were unable to blink, processing his command until your body moved of its own accord, reaching for the doorknob and opening it behind you.

“I’m sure your precious town will love to hear about this,” you threatened, wiping the tears away with the back of your hand. He just smirked and folded his arms over his chest again.

“Careful, Pumpkin. Daddy’s got one hell of a legal team; and they’re all eating out of his palm in that ballroom tonight.”

He had you beat. Checkmate. Every credible lawyer – and the seedy ones – were on his damn payroll. You couldn’t win this no matter what you did. You just had to walk away...

And so, you did. Quietly, you slipped out from the opulent town hall and found yourself stood on a street corner a couple of blocks away, out of the sight of not only your father and his invitees behind the huge windows of the ballroom, but out of sight of his cronies, already given the instruction to make sure you left quietly, and didn’t attempt to come back in.

You were alone, as you had become so accustomed to being.

Every riff felt wrong. For over a week now, Mary tried to write something new, something fresh that he’d never heard before, that excited him and inspired him but... nothing. He was beginning to think he’d lost his touch. He knew he couldn’t force inspiration to come, but this was a longer, drier spell than even he was used to...

He reached for his pack of smokes on the nightstand where they usually sat, only to discover he was fresh out – that last cigarette had truly been his last.

“Shit,” he cursed to himself, crushing the empty box in his palm and throwing it in the general direction of the trash can, hitting the rim and bouncing off to the floor beside two or three other crumpled cigarette boxes from the last few days.

Whew, he thought to himself, smokin’ more now, too. Awesome. Still, ignoring the mess he’d neglected to tidy, he stood up from his bed with a stretch, abandoning his tattered acoustic on his bed. His leather jacket that he’d slung over the back of his couch still held his keys, wallet and cell phone from his last outing to the gas station, and so he slithered his arms into the sleeves and headed for the door.

He knew he didn’t need to take the van to travel the four blocks to the gas station on the edge of town just for cigarettes, but there was something about a late-night drive that calmed Mary. It always felt like one of those rare moments where he got to be himself; a decent band on the stereo and some open road to clear his head.

He also knew he didn’t need to go all the way to the gas station for smokes; the convenience store on the corner would do just fine. Except, Forrest usually worked the late-night shifts at the gas station, and he’d get to take advantage of his staff discount.

“Hey man!” Mary called out as he walked into the store, the bell dinging above his head. Forrest looked up from the magazine he was reading, slumped over the counter.

“Well, look what the dogs dragged in...” Forrest smirked, “where’d you fuck off to the other night?”

Ah. He’d never explained where he’d disappeared to the night of the fair, nor had he seen any of his friends since. He hadn’t realised he’d shut himself off for that long, but seemingly, he had.

“Oh, uh...” he stammered, thinking up an excuse.

“Some chick got your attention, huh?” he stood upright and folded his arms, leaning against the edge of the counter. “I don’t know how you do it, man. You got ‘em lining up out the door. You shoot strawberry milkshake outta that dick, or what?” Mary relaxed instantly, his alibi already created for him.

“Why, you wanna taste?” he mocked, shooting a flying kiss at him as he stepped up to the counter in an overly camp, seductive walk to make the other laugh.

“I’ll stick to the slurpie machine, thanks,” he joked, pretending to gag at the thought of Mary’s strawberry milkshake. “You need somethin’, or you just here to entertain me?”

“Outta smokes,” Mary shrugged. “I’ll grab the usual.”

Forrest nodded, turning his back to fish through the cigarettes that lined the wall behind the counter, coming to the brand Mary would usually purchase. Mary looked to his left, seeing a special offer on party size bags of Takis and an array of candy bars. He chucked a bag up on the counter with some candy and fished inside his jacket for his wallet as Forrest rung him up.

“Big plans tonight, huh?”

“Oh yeah, big night in with my favourite girl, Mary Jane,” Mary waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“Explains the snacks, you always did get munchies worse than any of us...” he laughed, punching his employee code into the register to add his discount; something he did without thinking these days. Mary was always grateful. “$15.75”

“Thanks, man,” Mary handed over a twenty, shoving the change back in his wallet just as his phone started to buzz in his other pocket. He whipped it from his jacket, checking the caller ID when his chest tightened.

You.

Mary sneered at the phone in his hand, shoving it back into his pocket with a scowl on his face. If Forrest noticed, he didn’t question it, probably assuming it were a telemarketing scam.

“We should get a practise in before Saturday,” Forrest suggested, “I think Davey’s free on Tuesday? And I'm off too.” Mary hadn’t forgotten; they had a show to play in the city, some new goth club were having a metal night, and word of Mary’s band was starting to spread beyond the scene they’d been playing for the last two years.

“Uh yeah.” His phone stopped buzzing in his pocket. He ignored the feeling of disappointment in him, that gnawing voice in the back of his head that told him he should have answered it. “Yeah, I think I’m free. You wanna see if Jed’s about?”

Forrest made a noise that sounded vaguely like an affirmative as Mary picked up the bag with his purchases inside.

“Alright, uh...” Mary’s phone began vibrating in his pocket again, barely any respite since the last call. He ignored it, trying to claw himself back to reality instead of letting his mind drift to whatever you could possibly be calling him for. He was sure it was only one thing, anyway. “Let me know, man!”

“Yeah, see ya!” Forrest grinned, shutting the register with a ping and picking up his discarded magazine as Mary turned and left, the bell dinging above the door again. He stood outside for a moment, fishing his phone out of his pocket and seeing that it was indeed your name that flashed on his screen.

Once again, he ignored it, shoving it this time into the back pocket of his jeans and skulking back over to his van, parked in a bay near the door. It stopped just as he wrenched the door open with a rusty creak, throwing his bag into the passenger seat. He climbed in behind it, slamming the door shut and settling into the seat as he shoved the keys into the ignition. As he turned them and the engine roared to life with his stereo, he took a deep breath, leaning back against the head rest and desperately willing the thoughts of you to leave him be.

He’d wasted too much time on you already, and he meant what he’d said last time. He was tired of being everybody’s dirty little secret, and he wasn’t about to answer your fucking booty call. Not again.

Reaching into the plastic bag beside him, he pulled out his carton of cigarettes and ravaged the packaging until he could pry one from the box and shove it between his lips, pushing the lighter button in on his dashboard and waiting patiently for it to heat. Closing his eyes, he waited for the telltale click, reclining into his seat, when his phone began to buzz in his back pocket once again.

Mary’s eyes shot open, anger coursing through his veins. Were you that desperate to get laid? It wasn’t fair. He thought he’d made it clear where he stood, that he wasn’t interested in being picked up and dropped whenever someone felt like it anymore. He had to start thinking less with his dick and more with his head – and his heart.

But you were not getting the message – ignoring your calls wasn’t working. Maye he just needed to say it in black and fucking white.

Muttering curses to himself, he fished his phone from his back pocket where he sat, seeing that the caller ID did indeed read “Doll” again. He turned the volume of his stereo way down, took a deep breath, and answered the call.

“Look, I’m really not interested in being your booty call, Barbie,” he spat down the microphone, “so you might wanna just give it up now before you embarrass yourself.”

He was met with silence. He almost wanted to laugh, picturing the look of sheer shock on your face as you sat surrounded by your pink frills and stuffed animals in that ivory tower of yours. But instead, he waited. Would you dare speak? Argue with him? He’d managed to rile himself up enough by this point that maybe a fight was exactly what he needed to expel the rage.

The silence continued for a beat too long, and confusion set in. His brow furrowed, checking his phone screen to see if you’d hung up but no, you were still connected. He lifted the phone to his ear again, waiting... and then he heard it.

A sob.

A sob so small and timid, he thought maybe he wasn’t supposed to have heard it. But instantly, his face paled, and his chest hollowed. Every muscle in his shoulders that had tensed in his anger when he picked up the phone instantly turned to jelly. He’d expected resistance, maybe a “fuck you, Goore” or something to that effect. He’d expected an argument, rage, denial or defence.

He waited again, clicking the side button on his phone to turn the volume up in case he’d missed it. Now, he heard the sniffles too, along with the shuddering breath from an inhale that sounded uncontrollable. And then another small, suppressed sob.

He panicked, sitting bolt upright in his seat and pulling the cigarette from his lips as he looked around his surroundings as if there was something, someone who could help. Of course, there was nothing.

He didn’t expect you to react that way... Perhaps he’d been too harsh, maybe yelling at you wasn’t the right way to go about this, to cut his ties with you before they were truly bonded, but he hadn’t even thought it through. Mary just thought severing it with a quick, clean blow would do the trick...

“I-I... d-didn't... know who... to call,” you wept down the phone, breathing irregular as if you were suffering a panic attack. “I’m s-s... sorry.”

Instantly, Mary knew he’d fucked up. You weren’t calling him for a hook up, this was something different. Something had happened. You had already been in this state. And you’d turned to him for help. Mary swallowed a gulp of nothing, now realising his mouth and throat had gone dry whilst his jaw had hung open in bewilderment and panic.

“What’s going on?” he asked, frenzied. He waited for a response, only hearing more sobs; ones that you clearly were unable to hold back as you tried to speak, to tell him what had happened. Whatever it was, it was bad enough that you couldn’t say it without losing the small semblance of composure you had. You were in no fit state to talk about this on the phone.

The hand holding the phone dropped to his lap for a moment as he muttered a “shit” to himself, slamming his head back against the headrest. He was really going to do this, wasn’t he? He was going to run right to you, to go and fucking save you with some twisted sense of duty towards you. But then, yes, of course he was; Mary’s saviour complex had kicked in the second he heard that first tiny, frail sob.

He held the phone to his ear again.

“Look just... fuck, just breathe alright? Slowly, if you can. I’m coming, just make sure your window’s unlocked,” he instructed you, pressing his foot down on the clutch and shoving the gear stick into reverse.

“’m not... home...” you sobbed. Mary paused, confused.

“Well... where are you?” he asked, now more concerned as to what the hell had happened. If someone had laid a fucking finger on you...

“R-Raynor... street...”

Dead centre of town; anything could have happened, anybody could have been around.

“Alone?” he asked, incredibly uncomfortable with the idea of you being alone at this hour in the middle of town.

“M-mhm...” Mary cursed to himself again, holding the phone to his ear with his shoulder while he used both hands to spin the wheel of his van, quickly looking in his mirrors to reverse out of his parking spot before he could speed off into the night to come and find you.

“I’m coming, alright? Stay there. Keep your phone close, stay on the line. You keep off the street ‘til you hear me coming, you understand?” His instructions were clear, almost military-like. He needed you to hear him plainly.

“Oh...kay,” you sobbed, trying to quieten your sobs and regain control.

“Keep breathing, I’m on my way.”

Mary picked the phone from between his ear and shoulder and hit the loud-speaker button, throwing it onto his dash so he could drive easier through the streets as he headed into town. Thankfully the roads had been somewhat empty, most traffic lights turning green on the approach and no one to get in his way or flag him down for speeding at this hour. He just needed to get to you, as fast as possible.

Turning onto Raynor street, he slowed right down and got a good look; you were nowhere to be seen. He prayed to a god he didn’t believe in that you’d just followed his advice, hiding down an alleyway off the main street to keep out of sight of any passersby with bad intentions. He turned his stereo back up, a clear indication that it was him who was driving slowly down the street, watching and waiting for you to pop your head out of somewhere.

“C’mon, doll... where are you?” he muttered anxiously to himself, looking down every nook and cranny between buildings.

The music you heard edging closer down the street echoed what you could hear from your phone speaker, telling you that the vehicle approaching was him. A wave of relief washed over you, and you stepped out from between a hair salon and an apartment block near the end of the street. Mary's headlights caught on your dress, the sparkle catching his eye immediately and he sped up until he could break suddenly right next to you, jumping out of his van and running around it to get to you as quickly as he could.

His hands gripped onto your biceps and he held you out at arm's reach to get a good look at you; carefully placed make up had streaked from your tears, black rings forming around your eyes where your mascara had run. Your eyes themselves were bloodshot; how long had you been out here like this before you’d called him? You shivered in his hands, the cold of the night getting to you in this dress that left your arms and shoulders exposed, doing nothing to warm you at this late hour. He didn’t even think, shucking himself out of his jacket and wrapping it around your shoulders where his body heat had already warmed it.

“Are you hurt?” he asked, cupping your face in his hands and swiping the tear tracks away with his thumbs. You shook your head no, another sob rising in your throat now that he was here. You weren’t sure what you had been expecting, his initial reaction to your phone call clearly indicating he was still very much mad at you; not that you could blame him. But it didn’t escape your notice that he had come anyway, and the expression on his face was almost one of terror before his eyes had fallen on you, and softened considerably.

Something in him cared.

“Alright, come on... get in,” he settled a hand between your shoulder blades, guiding you gently and quickly to the passenger side of his van where he opened the door for you, helping you up. You settled into the seat, curling in on yourself and hugging Mary’s jacket closer to you for the warmth the night had stripped from you as he climbed in the driver’s side. He turned the stereo right down, the music now only to fill a silence rather than to alert you to his arrival.

“Is there... somewhere you want me to take you?” he asked, an awkwardness coming over him. He had no idea how to react in this situation, no clue what had happened or why you’d called him of all people when you had an entire security team on your side.

You seemed to think about it for a moment, a fresh wave of tears trickling from your eyes and dripping to your lap when you looked down in an attempt to hide your face.

“I... don’t have anywhere...” you sobbed, your fists tightening around the edges of Mary’s jacket to have something to ground you while your shoulders shook.

Mary watched on helplessly, his heart pounding in his chest. He wanted to reach over, to pull you into him and hold you so you could let out the much more violent sobs you were so obviously holding back. He was so used to the feistier side of you; your smart mouth, your confidence... It’s what drew him in, what attracted him to you like a moth to a flame. This wasn’t you.

It stirred up a need in him to help, to sacrifice his own discomfort in favour of your comfort. Instantly, he put you first, forgetting any resignations he had about ever seeing you again. That anger he harboured at how out-of-touch he thought you were? It dissipated the second he’d heard the first sob. He’d been triggered like a sleeper cell, instantly needing to patch up whatever wound you’d suffered.

“You don’t wanna go home?” he asked, figuring he already knew the answer. It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together. When you shook your head violently, he got the confirmation he needed. “Alright, well...” He was going to regret this, wasn’t he? But he’d said it before he could stop himself. “You could stop at my place for a bit.” Yep, he regretted it. “If it’s not too weird, or anything... I mean, I live alone, if you’re worried about my friends being ther-”

“Okay...” you sniffled.

Mary stopped rambling, instead reaching for the cigarette he’d never lit and thrown on his dash with his phone. Once again, he pushed the cigarette lighter in to heat up, adjusting the heating in the van to a warmer temperature too to warm you up.

“Alright um, sure...” He held the cigarette between his lips, shoving the van into gear and continuing down the street. “There’s a carton of cigs in the bag by your feet, if you want one,” he offered – more to fill the silence between you than anything. The quiet stereo could only do so much.

You sniffled and reached down to the bag, fishing through the plastic until you found the carton he’d mentioned and pulling one out for yourself hoping it might help to calm you. With a pop, the lighter signalled it was ready, and Mary held it out to you first as he focussed on the road. You lit it carefully with a small ‘thank you’ and settled back into your seat. The first drag helped settle your nerves, the heating in the van calming the shakes you’d had too, although you weren’t sure if that had been the panic or the cold of the night.

A few streets into the journey back to his place, you couldn’t take the quiet any longer. The awkward air between you felt so stale, icy in comparison to the warmth the van generated. As much as you wanted to relax in his presence – as he up until now had always been able to make you do – you just couldn’t. Not with the elephant in the back of the van, so to speak...

“I’m sorry... for calling,” you mumbled, still too full of shame to be able to look at him directly, only stealing a glance from the corner of your eye. Mary took a long drag of his cigarette, flicking the ash out of the crack he’d opened in his window. He looked between you and the road, as if thinking through his response a few times.

“You don’t have to apologise for that. I’m not one to leave a lady out in the cold...” he shrugged. He certainly wasn’t; literally or metaphorically.

“Thank you for coming, Mary. I didn’t know where to go...” Every time you thought back to the fight with your father, fresh and hot tears would well up in your eyes. It didn’t escape Mary’s notice, and he wanted nothing more than to reach over and squeeze your hand with reassurance. Instead, he settled on trying to lighten the mood a little. Comedy always had been his defence mechanism, after all...

“Dressed like that? I’d have said... Cinderella’s ball?”

You scoffed, the first genuine smile he’d seen from you as you shook your head. “Shut up,” you told him.

“You couldn’t call on the creatures of the forest to come help?” he continued, smirking when he saw your shoulders shaking in silent laughter, elbow propped up on the edge of your window. “Tinkerbell not got any pixie dust left for ya?”

You reached over and playfully slapped his chest, earning you an ‘ouch’ and an act of feigned pain as he recoiled. But you giggled to yourself, the absurdity of it all finally hitting you. Here you were sat in your sparkly peach gown with your satin elbow gloves, high heels and fancy hairdo, cradled by Mary’s leather jacket in a beat-up van that was old enough to still have a damn cigarette lighter in the dash. Perhaps you were Cinderella... Did that make Mary your Prince Charming, or your fairy God mother?

Now he’d heard you giggle – something he always loved hearing out of you – Mary could relax a little. There was still an awkwardness between you both, neither one of you could deny that, but the first layer of ice had been broken. For now, that would be enough. If you wanted to talk to him about what had happened when you got to his, then fine. If not, he figured that was okay too. At least he’d know you were safe and had someone by your side who cared about you; and yes, Mary could admit to himself now that he did care about you...

Just, maybe not to you – not yet. But it wasn’t something he could exactly deny either, when he’d dropped his ‘big plans’ of getting high and demolishing a bag of snacks alone with his guitar the second he’d heard your despair. And all of that in spite of his lingering anger towards you. How quickly he’d flipped that, from wanting nothing to do with you to racing to your rescue.

Mary’s apartment was small, as you’d expected. As you followed him inside, you looked around. The kitchen sat directly to your left cut off by a half wall to corner it in, a couch that looked like it had seen better days backed up against that half wall and pointed at an old television. Mary’s bed was unmade and pushed up against the far-right corner, facing the bathroom that took up as much space as his kitchen did but was the only room closed off. In the way of bedroom furniture, all he had was a small nightstand and a chest of drawers that had been knocked about some...

It seemed cosy, lived in. It wasn’t particularly tidy; a blanket strewn over the tatty couch, vinyls laying on top of his little coffee table and around his record player in the corner of his living space, guitars laying up against the wall here and there, an acoustic on his bed, pots and pans stacked up on the draining board in his kitchen – clean, but not yet put away.

Had Mary known he was having royalty stop by, he might have tidied up a little, but this was how it looked most of the time. He didn’t spend much time at home, especially now that his band were starting to take off a little. But truthfully, he avoided being alone at all costs. He got too much thinking done alone, hence why he had his distraction methods of weed and song-writing.

Mary scratched the back of his neck awkwardly and went to flick on a lamp by the couch. He quickly whipped around the space, picking up the strewn vinyls, straightening up the blankets. “Sorry about the mess,” he set as he jetted past you towards his bed to pick up his guitar and straighten out the blankets and pillows. You stood awkwardly in the entryway, his jacket still hanging off your shoulders as you picked at your gloves.

“No, it’s fine, it’s not that bad,” you told him, noting the few personal belongings Mary had too; most notably the little picture frame on a windowsill by the couch. A strikingly beautiful woman, and a goofy little boy snuggled tightly in her lap. Both were grinning into the camera, the boy’s front teeth missing. You guessed that was Mary, and the woman, his mother.

“Can I get you anything? I don’t know, a drink maybe? Or, uh...” He stood awkwardly, nervously wringing his hands and fiddling with his rings. It was so out of character for him, usually cocky and confident in everything he said or did. In a way, it was quite endearing...

“Maybe some water, if you don’t mind...” You winced at your own request, feeling like you’d already asked for too much tonight.

“Yeah... yeah, sure!” He jumped into action, rushing into the kitchen to fetch a clean glass from the cabinet. “Make yourself at home,” he told you, nodding towards the couch he’d just tidied. You walked towards it, draping his jacket over the arm and sitting on the edge of it, playing with your gloves until he came and sat opposite you, handing you a cold glass of water.

You took it with a thank you, downing a third of the glass once the water hit your tongue – you hadn’t realised just how thirsty the tears and panic had made you.

“So, um... you wanna tell me why you’re dressed like that?” Mary nodded at your dress, getting himself comfortable and ready to listen. You looked down at yourself, feeling utterly ridiculous now. This was your world... glitter, glam, sparkles; and you despised it.

“Fancy dinner at the town hall – pompous twats and vile politicians. Mom picked this out,” you scoffed.

“Huh,” he mused, “I mean, if it helps, you do look pretty...” he shrugged. A warmth rose to your cheeks at his compliment. “The mascara smudges are a nice touch, I think.” You laughed at that, wiping your fingertips along the underneath of your eyes and seeing the black collecting on the white satin. “So... what happened?”

He asked you so gently, and instantly you felt safe. His gaze wasn’t judgemental, just soft. In fact, it had taken you this long to mentally note that Mary wasn’t made up with his usual faded skull paint and fake blood. His face was clean, you could see every detail. You could see every emotive line, every twitch of his expressions and a vulnerability in him that the face paint usually masked. He had a kinder face than people gave him credit for. Suddenly, you got it. He was putting on a mask every day, just like you.

And so, you told him. You told him how you’d felt in that ballroom, looking around and seeing the real scumbags of this town. You told him about Mr. Nelson; what he’d said, what he’d done. Mary’s face hardened at that, an anger and protectiveness washing over him that had his fists balling up tightly. You told him how you’d excused yourself, and how your father had followed you to his office. Throughout, he stayed quiet, letting you speak and listening to everything you said. He’d react every so often, fetched you some tissues when the tears had started again. You told him everything, including how your father had screamed at you to follow his rules to not damage his “legacy”.

“And I told him I didn’t want to do that anymore... I wanted to do my own thing and live for me.”

Mary’s eyebrows raised in surprise, and he leaned forward, elbows on his knees.

“Shit... What did he say?” he asked, obviously knowing it hadn’t ended well.

“Told me to get out of his office,” the tears came again, your voice raising in pitch as you tried to hold back the sobs, “that this whole town was his office. Threatened me with lawyers if I tried anything. So... I just left.”

“He kicked you out into the street, alone, dressed like that, in the middle of the fucking night?” Mary’s anger was clear, spitting venom between clenched teeth. He couldn’t understand the nerve of your father, how he could be so damn stupid putting you in danger like that. “Fucking arrogant asshole...”

It was clearer to him more now than ever that he’d been so wrong about you...

He shuffled closer to you on the couch, cautiously wrapping an arm around your shoulders to comfort you in some way. Truthfully, he wanted to completely envelope you, to hold you and rock you and let you cry and sob and scream if you needed it. But it wasn’t until you lay your head on his shoulder that he felt okay to do so, finally pulling you into him to wrap his arms around you and let you cry into his chest.

He felt so warm beneath you, his heart rate a little elevated but the thumping kept you grounded as you held onto his shirt, curling into a sparkly little ball in his side. Mary cradled your head to him, stroking your hair and whispering to you about letting go, that you were safe here.

If he was being honest with himself, he knew how shitty he’d been to you. He’d become far too defensive too quickly, unable to see past his own injustices in his world to understand that your world came with them too. There had been signs of your confinement, of the tight leash you were kept on, but he’d wilfully ignored them, striking them off as privilege. Your bedroom alone should have been a giant red flag; how was a grown woman still sleeping in a child’s bedroom?

“I’m sorry, doll...” he told you, muttering into your hair as his lips gently pressed to the top of your head.

“Not on you, Mare. This has been coming for a while...” you sniffled, wiping your tears with your gloves as you snuggled into him a little further, utterly comfortable in his hold.

“No, I mean...” Mary sighed to himself, “I’ve been an asshole. I got too defensive, thought you were just being a brat or something, y’know? I judged you and I shouldn’t have.”

Slowly, you sat upright, turning to look at him as his arms fell to his sides.

“You don’t have to apologise, I get it... I wasn’t exactly good to you either,” you admitted, looking down at his shirt now stained with tears to avoid his eyes. “You were right, I was treating you like I was ashamed of you.”

Mary sat up straight, clasping his hands together as he nodded in understanding. “We’ve all got our shit, doll.” His eyes drifted to the picture on his windowsill, and you couldn’t help but follow his gaze. You saw how he clenched his jaw, fiddling with the rings on his fingers as sadness crept into his eyes.

“Who was she?” The question slipped out before you got the chance to stop yourself. From the way Mary tensed up beside you, you could tell it was a sore spot.

“That’s my mom,” he looked back to you, a sad smile on his face.

“Is she...?”

“Dead? No...” he laughed awkwardly. “But she is in a care facility. That’s just the only photo of us I’ve got.”

You nodded in understanding, not wanting to push the matter. But Mary felt like sharing... You’d been vulnerable with him, shared your shit. Maybe he should share his too, or at least some of it. Maybe you were the only person he could be honest with. You were certainly the only person he’d wanted to get to know him in a long time.

“She was a drinker. It got worse when my dad left, but he was a waste of fucking space anyway. We, uh, didn’t have a lot...” his eyes flickered to the battered old guitar that now leaned against the wall by his bed, “but eventually her liver kind of gave up, so she’s on dialysis for the rest of her life. She needs constant care, but she’s still with us.”

“I’m so sorry... no wonder you thought I was just being a brat,” you laughed awkwardly, feeling a little pathetic now.

“Like I said, we all got our shit. It's not a contest, I just... realised I wanted you to know something real about me.”

Silence descended over you along with the weight of what he’d just admitted. Mary wanted you to know him. He wasn’t running or hiding himself from you. He’d shared something so personal to him, and you felt that it was something not a lot of people might know about him, if any. Something about you made him feel just as safe as a part of him did for you.

You looked at him; really looked at him. There was a sadness in his eyes, something you could notice now that you were sat merely inches apart from him with his mask firmly ripped away and laying in pieces on the floor. Whatever wall he usually put up, he’d let down just for you. You felt close to him, unbelievably so. You felt an urge to protect him, defend him. You felt a pull towards him, undistinguished in its meaning but so strong you couldn’t ignore it anymore.

And as Mary stared back at you, his wounds exposed, he too felt that same pull. Who was he kidding? He’d felt it for a while. How else would he explain being unable to go barely minutes without thinking of you over the last few weeks?

His eyes flicked down to your lips, heart racing and mind spinning out of control. He’d never felt so exposed. He wanted to kiss you, to show you what he felt in that moment, but it scared him. He already had shared so much, feeling just as vulnerable as he had as a child.

In your corner, the silence got heavier with every second that passed. If he was going to kiss you, you would let him. You couldn't think of a better way to show him just how much you cared, how close you felt to him; that you truly wanted him.

Just as you thought he might lean in, he snapped out of his trance, sucking in a breath between his teeth.

“Well, hey... you can stop here tonight. I can find you something to wear, I’m pretty sure I got something in the back,” he joked, wiggling his eyebrows, “I can take you from riches to rags!”

He slapped his thighs and stood up from the couch, marching over to the dresser by his bed and rifling through his drawers. You stayed put, thrown off by his sudden escape. From such an emotional, tender moment to him throwing that wall back up, closing up shop... You almost got whiplash from the speed at which he put the brakes on. Disappointment lay heavy in your chest.

He came back over with a folded t-shirt and some plaid pyjama pants you could tie up to keep them on. “There’s clean cloths in the bathroom under the sink if you wanna wash up, towels if you wanna shower,” he handed you the clothes where you sat. “I’ll take the couch, you got the bed and we’ll figure out a plan in the morning.”

“O-okay...” you stammered, standing up with the folded clothes. Frankly, you felt a little dazed from his shift in demeanour, but you could hardly blame him either. Sharing that had to have been harder than you first thought.

You walked past him into the bathroom, locking the door and pulling on the string light to awaken the fluorescent bulb above you. Now catching a glimpse of yourself in his mirrored medicine cabinet, you saw the state of yourself. Make up smeared all over your face, streaks of black running from your eyes to halfway down your neck. They looked bloodshot and tired, staring lifelessly back at you. Your hair had fallen out of place from its fancy updo, and you looked as if you’d been dragged through a cornfield by your ankles.

Deciding against a shower, you settled for wiping the make-up from your face and taking your hair down, attempting to detangle it with the comb you found in the medicine cabinet. You’d found a bottle of cologne in there too, which when you sniffed, smelled exactly like Mary had smelled the night he’d climbed through your bedroom window. You smiled fondly at the memory, noting how the bottle was largely untouched, still having the price tag on it which only confirmed that he’d bought it and worn it just for you.

By the time you were done and changed into the clothes Mary had found you, Mary had made himself a makeshift bed from the blanket he’d previously folded on the couch and one of the pillows from his bed. He was already laying under it, having changed into some old shorts and removed his shirt.

“You can put your dress on the dresser, and I can run out and grab you something to wear tomorrow so you’ve got something other than this to wear,” he called from the couch, sitting up so he could speak directly to you.

“Thank you. I’ll get out of your hair tomorrow, I’m sure my dad just needs to calm down...” you told him. Mary couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed, but also, protective. He wasn’t about to send you home to that, and he didn’t want you to feel like a burden on him either.

“Sure, if that’s what you wanna do...” he muttered, his lips straightening into a line as he nodded. “Well... get some rest.”

“Yeah, I will... thank you, Mary,” you told him.

“Don’t sweat it,” he smiled, laying down on the couch and pulling the blanket over his bare shoulders. Without another word, you placed your clothes on the dresser and crawled into his bed, notably cold without him in it. Mary flicked off the lamp by the couch, plunging the apartment into mostly darkness save for the moonlight and the nearest streetlamp shining through his window.

The same window where the picture of him and his mother sat.

He could see it where he lay. In fact, he couldn’t look away. That smile on both of their faces reminded him of a time that was so rare. He could still hear her laughter mixing with his giggles as she’d hugged and tickled him, his grandmother who was long since gone snapping the picture on a whim.

That little boy didn’t have many memories like that to come. He’d grown up far too soon, knowing how desperately his mother needed the help. His childhood was the two of them stuck out at sea, a hole in their boat – and Mary was the only one fishing the water out with a bucket. Eventually, it was bound to go under, so he worked harder, did everything he could to keep them afloat and yet... it wasn’t enough.

The world had got him all wrong. When they thought he was bunking off school, he was working for a dollar an hour. When he’d been caught shoplifting, it was for a gift for his mother’s birthday. When he’d dropped out of school, it was to work every hour God sent to keep them from going hungry. When he finally did go off the rails in his late teens, it was after his mother’s liver failed. This poor, grown-up little boy had no one to look after anymore, and he’d spiralled. He was his only responsibility, but he’d never learned to care for himself – just the people around him. He always had to save them.

Mary wiped the stray tear from his cheek, rolling over to face the back of the couch and will himself to sleep. He couldn’t tell if it was an hour or mere minutes that passed as he lay there, huddled under his old blanket on a couch that poked at his ribs under the cushions.

“Mary...?” you whispered into the night, testing and hoping that he’d still been awake enough to hear. When he looked up, he saw you sat up in his bed, surrounded by emptiness, hugging your knees to your chest. In the dim streetlight, tear tracks sparkled on your face just like your dress.

Before he knew what he was doing, his feet had carried him across the room. Tentatively, he sat at the edge of his bed, close enough that he could reach out and tuck your fallen hair behind your ear. Neither of you spoke; there was no need. It was obvious you needed the proximity, both vulnerable and in need of comfort.

Mary’s eyes flicked between yours and your lips again, hesitating as his mind raced with conflicting arguments for and against giving in. He still wasn’t sure you truly wanted him. Maybe all you wanted in him was a friend, the sex having been a distraction or way to rebel. All Mary knew for sure was that you’d trusted him enough to be the one you called when you were in trouble. He didn’t want to break that trust now...

But it was like you could see the cogs turning in his brain, the inner argument going on inside him. The battle wouldn’t be won by him alone; you were going to have to prove to him that you wanted him, that he wasn’t just your dirty little secret or some booty call.

Slowly, you shuffled yourself closer to him, unwrapping your arms from around yourself and instead, pushing his floppy hair from in front of his face, getting a good look at him. That gorgeous face of his sat bathed in the dim light, caught between distant sadness and childlike wonder. With one last flicker down to your lips and back up to your eyes, he caught you smiling softly at him, your fingertips dancing across his jawline.

And then finally, you leaned into him and pressed your lips gently to his. His eyes fluttered shut just as yours did, and he relaxed under your touch as if his limbs had melted. Mary, now feeling marginally more confident in where he stood, tilted his head to better sculpt his lips against yours. He was so gentle with you, his hands lifting to hold yours against his cheeks by the wrists. As the seconds passed, your lips moved together in tandem, both of you leaning into each other until he was able to wrap a hand around your waist and hold you against him, cradling each other in such a tender moment.

This was undeniably different to any other kiss you’d shared. There was no move to advance, no desperation, no frantic arousal or rushed passion. This time, you simply held each other, seeking comfort in the affection you had for each other.

As you parted, you rested your forehead against his, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck as he held you still so close to him, not yet willing to let go.

“Stay with me tonight...?” you requested, hoping he’d have no problem with the idea. Mary just nodded dumbly, overcome with a warm desire to never let you sleep alone again. You reached around you, pulling the blankets off of your lap to welcome him into them. He climbed in beside you, resting his head on the pillows as you, without a second thought, curled into his chest and let his arms envelope you. Neither one of you wanted to be alone tonight after sharing pieces of your soul with one another.

Exhausted from the outpouring of emotion, you were soon lulled into a deep sleep by his rhythmic heartbeat and natural warmth. Mary, although exhausted himself, was still barely awake when he felt your body go limp against him. He smiled to himself, satisfied in the knowledge that he’d given up a part of himself he was sure he’d never trust anybody with.

And yet, the wound was still open; spinning with memories, his mind lingered on one in particular, triggered when his tired eyes had fallen on that battered and beat up old guitar against the wall. That thing served as a reminder that Mary had only ever had Mary looking out for him, and that given a choice between himself and somebody else, he would always save anybody but himself...

Mary waited patiently on the couch, his attention span null and void as the after-school cartoons blared on the TV set in front of him. He sat on the edge of his seat, quite literally, his feet kicking back and forth as he watched the clock.

With the big hand on the 2, and the little hand on the 6, she’d be home any minute now. So, Mary waited as patiently as he could.

Except, it wasn’t until the big hand had done a full circle, and the little hand was on the 7, that he heard the keys fumbling in the lock of the front door, followed by a telltale creak, and the slam of it behind footsteps.

Mary jumped up, already on edge and over-excited. He ran into the hallway, to find his mother leaning against the wall with her eyes shut, head back against the plaster. She looked sick, her skin paled more than usual and her lips tainted with a familiar red stain.

“Ma?” he asked, placing his little hand on her arm. Her eyes shot open, and she looked down at Mary next to her.

“There’s my boy!” she slurred, leaning down to smother a sloppy kiss to his cheek. He wiped his cheek in childlike disgust, giggling to himself. “Happy birthday, baby!”

She stood as upright as she could manage, bringing her purse with her while she stumbled into the living room, into the armchair Mary’s dad used to occupy that faced the TV set. Mary followed, bouncing on his feet with excitement. He’d waited all day for his mom to come home, hadn’t been able to focus in school for even a second. He stood and waited in front of her as she settled into the chair, dropping her purse in her lap.

“Would you like your present baby?” she asked, smiling through hooded eyes that could barely focus. Mary nodded frantically, his heart pounding in his chest.

It had been weeks since he’d spoken to his mother about the guitar he so desperately wanted. He’d spent most of his weekends at Mr. Rogers’ workshop, sweeping up wood shavings and running errands for a little bit of pocket money to help his mother save for this exact moment. He couldn’t wait any longer...

His mother giggled, reaching into her purse and pulling out a small, square-shaped gift wrapped in balloon wrapping paper.

For a moment, Mary was confused... But this had to be just a decoy. He remembered seeing these CDs in the music store; ‘Guitar Basics for Beginners’, audio instructive lessons that would be far cheaper than real in-person lessons.

He tore into the paper, throwing the trash to the side and flipped the CD around to look at the front. It was an album; State of Euphoria by Anthrax. Mary’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion, surprised to find it wasn’t what he’d thought.

“That’s the band you like, right? Or... One of them,” his mother hiccupped, leaning on her elbows with a grin.

“Y-yeah... thanks, ma.” His tone was unmistakably disappointed.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, swiping her thumb across his cheek and pinching it lightly. Mary chewed the inside of his cheek, wondering if he should say anything. He wasn’t one to be ungrateful, this was still a pretty great gift. Anthrax were one of the bands he had found he really loved recently.

“No it’s great, ma, really. Thank you... It’s just,” he paused for a moment, choosing his words carefully, “could I get my guitar now? I read this book that teaches you about the frets and the notes of the strings, and stuff!” His words were rushed in that way over-excited children speed up the longer their sentence becomes.

If his mother’s skin could pale any more, it did then.

“Well, I... I couldn’t get the guitar, baby,” she told him, trying to let him down gently.

“But... I helped Mr. Rogers? I thought we had enough?” he asked, his cheeks heating as if he were about to cry, but he didn’t want to make his mother feel bad by letting them spill.

“I-I’m sorry, Mary... I needed to use that money...” she shrank back within herself, shame and guilt weighing on her shoulders.

“For what?” he asked, genuinely confused, his tears building in his eyes. He was devastated... He worked so hard to get the guitar, to prove his mind was made up and he wouldn’t give up on learning it. But his mother just stared at him, her lip trembling as she saw her little boy so heartbroken.

She knew exactly what she had spent it on; the very thing she promised she’d try and give up.

“I... I’m s-sorry, b-baby,” she sobbed, tears spilling down her pale cheeks and her chest tightening around her breaths. She broke down, sobbing into her hands and hiding her face from the son she’d just disappointed so tragically.

Mary wanted to be angry. It wasn’t fair... It was him who worked for that money, him who had tried so hard to help her. She was supposed to be the one adult he could count on, they were a team, weren’t they? He never asked for anything, ever. But just once, he wanted this. But she’d put her wine and God only knows what other alcohol before him again.

He wanted to be angry. He tried to be. But his mother was hurting, she was crying, sobbing in front of him. She needed help. She was broken. She hadn’t meant to do this... right?

Of course not. Her alcoholism had just gotten out of control, and unfortunately, addiction is a lonely and selfish ailment. Sober, her mind wouldn’t even think of doing something so selfish. But these days, she was rarely sober.

Mary looked at his mother, crumpled up and sickly looking, weeping into her palms, and he just wanted to save her. He always wanted to save her.

“Ma, it’s okay...” he told her, trying too hard for an 11-year-old not to cry. “Ma, don’t cry... I can keep working for one, it’s okay. I like the CD, I really do.” he squished himself between her and the arm of the chair, wrapping his arms around her and cuddling into her. She was inconsolable, sobbing so loudly she drowned out the cartoons on the TV set. She’d lost control of herself, and Mary was the only one around to pick up the pieces.

“Shh, ma, it’s okay. It’ll be okay!” he told her, squeezing her as tightly as he could. “I’m here, don’t cry.”

She’d screwed up big time, and whether Mary had chosen to forgive her or not, she wouldn’t be able to forgive herself for this. If she wasn’t already buried up to the neck in a pit of self-loathing, this was the last shovel full of cement to trap her in.

But Mary had already decided that he’d do what he could to dig her out. She was his mother, she did everything for him that she could... why wouldn’t he help her too?

A guitar could wait a little while longer. For now, his mother needed him – and he’d work as hard as he needed to save her.

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strawberry-lemonade-kisses · 8 months ago

Text

Empty Nester's (M)

Tags - manga spoilers, new manga ending because it's mine, Fem Reader, Reader is called mama, mom, etc. Cunnilingus, squirting, idk

"With the children away for the weekend, what do you guys have planned?” Makio was swaddled with your baby, 11 months old and so big already, she could easily be mistaken for much older than she is. She was like her daddy, big, smart, and sweet. Harumi had been visiting the Uzui’s on the weekends for the past month giving you and Gyomei a break but also preparing them for the arrival of their own bundle of joy in the coming months. Of course, you had spent weekends as a family with them but then it was suggested that she stay by herself. You compromised with all three of the kids staying with the Uzui’s that way at least Muichiro and Genya knew their sister and could help.

“I don’t think we are doing anything special, a night in, maybe we will get a full night of sleep” Gyomei laughed from the doorway where he was talking with Tengen, the boys crowding him as he talked of their weekend plans. Makio squinted, rolling her eyes before turning back to you. “How is Hinatsuru? Has the tea been helping ease her stomach? It was heaven sent for me, Shinobu had trained Aoi so well” Makio nodded, bouncing slightly as Harumi stirred from where she rested.

“She is doing much better, eating a lot more which we are grateful for. She had us all worried. But she is well, excited to see Harumi, I think the maternal instincts are already kicked in because she hasn’t stopped talking about Harumi since she left last weekend” You nodded, understanding the feeling, throughout your pregnancy just seeing babies made you want to cry from happiness, some mothers would even come chat when they noticed your heavy stomach, letting you gush over their baby.

“Yeah, but Harumi is also the sweetest girl, so patient and she loves her brothers so she’s happy when they are around” Harumi’s head lifted at the mention of her brothers. “You should head home before she falls asleep, she sleeps like her father at night and Hinatsuru may not get to play with her” You urged the Uzui wife back towards the door, Tengen noticing the movement moved to let Makio pass.

“That’s our cue then, we will see you all in 3 days, have a good night, and try not to have too much fun!” Tengen winked before turning to follow his wife, your sons leaving with a wave and a few air kisses before following as well, a row of little ducklings.

As the door slid shut your husband turned to you.

“Come on, I have something for you” He was rocky, still settling into the prosthetic leg, it made him sway a lot when he walked but he no longer had to hold onto your shoulder, he could walk just by holding your hand which was an improvement. He was still hesitant about holding Harumi while standing but that would happen with time, just had to be patient.

“You’ve been so patient with us, every single one of us, from the boys to Harumi, and to me. Since the fall of the demons almost 2 years ago you’ve been so attentive and working nonstop, making sure everyone is comfortable and happy, you’ve kept everyone fed and bathed. You even changed our bandages and helped us bathe, which is no small feat. You did so much and I just wanted you to know how grateful I am, and how grateful the boys are to have you, to call you my wife, to call you a mother. I am so happy to be here with you, to have been given the chance to stay on this planet with you and live happily.” He paused his speech as you got to the backyard, lit with lanterns and decorated with flowers. There was a large blanket in the middle of the yard, filled with pillows to create what looked like the coziest bed ever. Sitting next to the bed was a tray lined with snacks and wine alongside 2 glasses.

“What is all this? When did you do all this?” You turned towards your husband of 5 years someone who you had watched grow into the beast of a man before you today, so gentle and loving and at the same time he held power you couldn’t even imagine carrying after knowing him for 8 years he still gave you butterflies.

“Had some help, you are quite oblivious when you are with Harumi so it was easy, she loves her mama just as much as I do. You are an amazing woman and I’m so honored and blessed to call you my wife.” Your eyes watered at the thought behind this surprise and his sweet words, you hadn’t put thought into the things you did, there was a house to run and a family to take care of after they literally saved the world, the least you could do is take care and help them, it was almost natural, you had been taking care of Gyomei’s injuries since you had first met in the wisteria house your family-owned, although it was closed now, once again it was just a home but more than welcome to those who were former corps members.

“I don’t know what to say” his hands moved to your back, gently guiding you towards the bed, the warmth from the overwhelming amount of candles provided such comfort that it didn’t take long for your muscles to relax as you sunk into the cushions and pillows.

“you don’t need to say anything, just relax, enjoy your night” There was a soft smile on Gyomeis face as he sat down, stretching his legs. “c’mere let me hold you” his words were quiet, like a whisper to draw you into his space, you didn’t hesitate before moving between his legs, letting your back rest against his chest while he wrapped you in his arms, letting his hands rest on your thighs. You both sat in silence, enjoying the clear night with the stars shining so bright you could probably see without the candles, but they provided extra comfort to your night. It was nice having a night with just the two of you, it was something that you hadn’t experienced in years. Between them fighting Muzan and having to relearn how to live normally, to giving birth to your daughter there was always a full house. Now they were able to leave, more than ready to get out of the house and spend time with their friends and family. It was something you weren’t quite ready for. Large hands were wiping away tears before you could realize you were crying.

“What ails you? What can I do?” Gyomei was soft as he addressed you, still holding your cheek as you relaxed back into him.

“They are all leaving, they can leave us now” you sniffled, turning around to face your husband, sitting on your knees. “Gyomei, the boys are gonna get married and leave” Deep down you knew it was ridiculous to think that they would suddenly leave, they were only 17 but you were dating Gyomei at 19 and he was 22, they could leave at any age. Gyomei smiled, his clouded eyes flickering about.

“Let’s slow down, no one is going anywhere. They are spending the weekend with the Uzui’s, and no one is getting married anytime soon unless we marry them off. Lay back, listen to that quiet, no kids, no screaming or fighting, no crying. Tranquility. S nice isn’t it?” You sat back, taking Gyomei’s advice and listening to the world around you. “What do you hear?” you listened close, relaxing into the embrace of your beloved and closing your eyes to truly listen.

“I hear the trees as they shake.”

“Mhm”

“I hear The birds sing their young to sleep. It sounds like they are getting tired” You were focusing, you swear you were, but his hands were distracting, wandering from your hips. His touch started slow, just rubbing your sides like he did when you wanted to relax, but then they started to move inwards, resting on your stomach and moving up.

“What else do you hear” His voice was low like he was telling you something you were allowed to hear, trying to hide it from the world.

“um…” You couldn’t focus on the sounds, not when he cupped one of your breasts, applying pressure as he leaned into your neck, wet kisses trailing from your jaw to your collarbone.

“focus, what’s going on?” The tone of his voice was a warning, a baritone hum as he continued his ministrations, biting into the skin of your neck as you leaned to the side, giving him more access.

“Frogs” is all you got out, moaning as one hand undid the ties to your clothing and the other continued to fondle you.

“good girl, what else” He paused, leaning back to watch each inch of your kimono fall off your shoulders and reveal your skin.

“I-“ a moan interrupted you as both his hands went to work, pinching the nipple of one breast while massaging the other. His lips still danced along your skin, slowly compared to his rough hands. “The river” He hummed into your skin, encouragement to continue as he worked like he was tuning a violin, plucking the strings of your pleasure until he had it just right. “You” Your answer was met with his hands removing themselves from your body, his mouth detaching itself from your skin. You sat up, turning to look at your husband.

“Yeah? What do I sound like?” His disheveled hair and lack of prayer beads had him looking almost feral, his hooded gaze staring down at you as he crawled over you, moving you until your back hit the ground, looking up at him. Your answer never came as he engulfed you in a kiss, claiming your lips as his own. You couldn’t stop the moan that erupted as one of his hands found purchase on your hip, pulling the band of your panties until they snapped back at your skin. Your tongue grazed his lip, asking for more, and was met with a hasty reply. Your mouths danced so familiarly with one another, like every movement of the other's tongue was rehearsed, practiced an infinite number of times over, each clash of teeth and head tilt a piece of intricate choreography. Gyomei pulled back gasping, head tilting towards your ear.

“You know what I want?” He hummed pressing a kiss to your collar, lips wet with your shared saliva. You made a noise of acknowledgment, too high-strung by his constant touches everywhere but where you wanted. You're sure if you looked down you would see your panties soaked through, uncomfortably damp but you couldn’t care less. “I want to be the one to listen to the pretty noises you make when you cum on my tongue” Your breath hitched as he placed another kiss on the slope of your breast, moving his way down your body, with teasing touches and wet kisses. “Okay?” He continued his path down your body, nipping at your hip bone, tracing the soft skin of your stomach as he nosed at your panties.

“Yes sir”

“Good girl” His praise was accompanied by his tongue, licking at the wet patch that had stained your panties. He was never a patient man when it came to pleasure, you had grown used to it, he knew what he wanted and he wasn’t afraid to take it if you let him, and who were you to deny your husband of such pleasures? He pulled aside your panties, not bothering to slide them off your hips, just revealing the glistening beauty of your pussy. The groan he let out was pure sin like a predator warning its prey before it eats them. Which is what he planned on doing. Gyomei didn’t waste time, diving into the heat of your pussy. His tongue flicked at your throbbing clit, teasing and divine. He went from flicking to sucking, not wasting a breath between both, switching the rhythm to keep you on edge. You reached down, hoping to hold onto him as grounding, afraid you would float away in the thralls of pleasure.

“Mei, please don’t stop” You moaned a symphony for him, following the beat of his tongue. 2 fingers pushed their way into your heat, thick and practiced it was almost too natural for him to do it, like he was using the hand to tighten the ropes of your pleasure, cranking at them in hopes they would break. He hummed into you, enjoying his meal thoroughly, eyes closed like he was lost in his own heaven and that ad you clenching, teetering on the edge of orgasm thinking he was enjoying this as much as you. By the way you could make out the subtle shift of his hips against the ground, you had no doubts he was. His fingers curled upwards, thrusting in at a speed faster than his tongue. You fell, the pleasure quickly overwhelming your body jolted, trying to breathe through the pleasure. You saw stars, eyes rolling back for a few seconds as his ministrations continued, not wanting to slow and end his own pleasure. Another groan resonated through your core that had you yelping, an unfamiliar swirl in your stomach itching forward.

“C’mon baby” He moaned again, begging for your body, and his hand continued it work, mouth quickly attaching back to your overly sensitive bud. A second orgasm came crashing down on you, a litany of explants leaving your mouth as you released all pent-up energy, coating your husband's face in a stream of pleasure. He lapped eagerly at your sex, not wasting a drop of you, pulling his fingers out and licking them clean as well while you tried to come back to earth, breathing heavily and holding weakly to the and that still held your panties to the side. Gyomei sat on his heels, rubbing at your tighs while you tried to get ahold of yourself.

“You did so good mama’s, so good for me, huh?” His tone was encouraging. He was careful as he moved your legs together, giving him room to lay next to you, a space heater for your bare body, still recovering. You looked at him through lidded eyes, a sleepy smile gracing your lips.

“Gyomei,” You whispered, still breathless. He smiled, pulling you into his chest so you could snuggle in, using your kimono as a blanket to cover you and keep you warm.

“I’m here” He pressed a kiss to your head, damp, but you didn’t care.

“Thank you” He hummed, knowing that this was just the beginning of a long night.

#gyomei himejima #kny gyomei #gyomei x reader #gyom #demon slayer gyomei #kimetsu gyomei #kny #kny hashira #kny scenarios #kny x y/n #kny x reader #kny x you #kny smut #demon slayer fanfic #kny fanfic #kny himejima #gyomei x y/n #gyomei smut #gyomei headcanons

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utilitycaster · 2 months ago

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what are those 5 things? 👀

Seeing people start admit that maybe Imogen and Laudna did in fact pressure Fearne excessively hard to take the shard. I think it's good Fearne took it in the end, but yeah they really made it difficult for her to express her doubts and that was shitty of them. I got extensive hate for saying that at the time from people who are literally saying the same thing now. It's very funny.

The (entirely valid) complaints I've seen that people care more about imo/dna as a ship than Laudna as a character and are making her book solely about the fact that Imogen will show up in it. I pointed out this exact same problem occurring while Laudna was dead, almost two years ago.

Caleb considering leaving the Nein means they aren't really bonded. Imogen considering leaving Bells Hells means she's so perfect and caring and selfless and noble and good. Anyway yeah sure I definitely believe that if Imogen were a man played by Liam everyone would definitely be totally uncritical and love everything she did. (This is also a layered one, given how Twitter has been bashing Orym nonstop for over a year).

I know it's been a month and I've said this repeatedly so this is a bit tacky but I'm still riding the absolute Irony High of people being like "STOP TALKING ABOUT HUBRIS STOP TALKING ABOUT HUBRIS anyway of COURSE Bells Hells would NEVER see the gods as a messed up family, just like them" and then jump cut to Laudna literally saying that. It's just genuinely so funny that people mad at everyone calling Aeor full of hubris proceeded to get their wax wings straight up vaporized at the top of episode 102.

People calling imo/dna the bestest most organic most slow-burn sapphic ship ever (it's not even the longest slow-burn f/f ship on Critical Role; even if you're stupid enough to count the two years we know virtually nothing about just for the purposes of padding out the time to eliminate Beauyasha on a technicality - nevermind that slowburn is about the length of the story itself and not the length of time the characters have known each other, since it's obvious that if someone said 'here's Jane and Kate, they've known each other for 300 years, now they are kissing' this would not be a satisfying slowburn unless like, you went back and filled in the 300 years - Kimallura STILL wins) but as someone who received a decent amount of harassment for saying it wasn't very interesting and as such kept tabs on the people engaging in that harassment...they've been dropping like flies. If it's the best sapphic ship ever and it's canon and you're in the top 5 ships for the show of all time on ao3 and Delilah's gone and they're going to get their cottage, funny how a good chunk of the shippers haven't even managed to stay interested in CR. Also why are half the people who HAVE kept up like hmmmm what if I threw Fearne or Ashton in there. Like believe me, I support a poly hells situation, but uh. quite a tumble for what people used to call the Beating Heart Of The Campaign (TM).

Bonus! This is below a cut because it has spoilers for next week's Re-Slayer's Take that's only out for Beacon subscribers but

we see Devexian, and he meets Frog (an aeormaton PC) and his overall statement on Aeor is "it created us to serve, and we fought for our autonomy. It was both a beautiful and terrible place. Anyway the past is past, what's important is that we as aeormatons take our chance to live now, and my personal goal is not just to bring back as many aeormatons as I can, but learn how to make more aeormatons." He is completely uninterested, at least in 839 PD, in any sort of action against the gods. Like, I think he regrets the fall of Aeor because a lot of Aeormatons and knowledge died in it but he literally is like "your life is defined by your own choices, not your designation at the time of Aeor." The actual survivors of the fall of Aeor are like anyway, we want acceptance, autonomy, and the means to control our own production in modern day Exandria. Ludinus whomst.

#answered #Anonymous #cr tag #cr discourse

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buckyalpine · 2 years ago

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Hi love ! I have a really fluffy request for you ! Bucky and reader are married and have a beautiful baby girl about 3-4 years old .But when they first met , Bucky and Reader where always bickering , seemingly hating each other. One day , Reader gets home from work to find her husband and daughter on the couch . She’s in her dad’s lap facing him while he’s telling her a story . She smiles at the image in front of her and moves closer to hear the story . The story is how her dad fell in love with her mom . And while she expected to hear about the day they both realized what they had wasn’t hate for each other but love , she heard a completely different story . One Bucky hasn’t told her about . He told his daughter about the first day her ever saw her mom . How the moment he looked at her smile he knew he was we head over heels and wanted to be the one to place all her smiles there . Reader starts sniffling and that’s when they both notice her and run towards her to attack her with hugs and kisses cause they think you’re sad . And then Bucky tells both of you the story of how he fell in love with his wife . Just enemies to lovers and a bunch of domestic fluff

THIS IS SO CUTE MY GOODNESS I've been so excited to get to this from the moment I saw it. Amazing. This is beautiful. I hope you see this my lovely, this request was from a while back, I’m so sorry I took so long to get to it

You smiled hearing your husbands soft voice carry through from the living room while you hung your coat in the closet. Your heart warmed at the sight you saw in the living room, your sweet baby looking wide eyed at your husband while he told her a story. Her attention was completely on him, she didn't even hear the door open or your footsteps. You cocked your head, wondering exactly how great this story was, raising your brow when you heard his next few words.

"And that's when I saw your mama"

Your baby squealed, clapping her hands hearing the entrance of her pretty mommy, scooting closer so she could hear every word. Bucky grinned, letting her crawl onto his lap, letting her get settled before continuing. You silently giggled to yourself, reminiscing about the way you and Bucky fell in love. You had always bickered, never agreeing on anything. You expected Bucky to tell your baby girl about how one day you both realized all the little arguments, disagreements and quarrels were because you were both too silly to realize you were both in love with each other.

5 years ago

“You’re a fucking dumb ass” You hissed, glaring at the smug super soldier who had a cocky smirk on his face, unbothered that you looked like you were about to strangle him across the jet.

“No need to flatter me princess-oh shi-

You lurched from your seat, ready to tackle Bucky to the floor, only to be stopped by a large arm snaking around your waist, pulling you back.

“Put me down Rogers” You growled while Steve chuckled, holding you to his side like a football. “Just let me have 5 minutes with him”

“You’re both like school children” Steve held you in place while you huffed, wishing you could swing at Bucky’s jaw at least once but alas, it wasn’t your lucky day.

There wasn’t a day where you and Bucky got along. It was like he was sent on this earth for the sole purpose of annoying you and it had been that was from the day you met. Every since you joined the team, Bucky made it his mission to critique you and annoy you in every way possible. Your fighting form, mission assignments, weapon choice, even the way you made your damn coffee was a problem for him.

“I like my coffee black”

“Well excuse me for not wanting to drink hot bitterness first thing in the morning”

“Not a fan of hot bitterness, would be difficult to drink me, wouldn’t it”

You threw your toast at Bucky’s head while he cackled, it wasn’t even 7 am yet and Bucky had trailed behind you, determined to start your morning off with his nagging.

“You don’t even taste the coffee when you add milk and sugar” Bucky sassed, loving every minute of you getting more and more riled up with his side commentary, there was something about you when you got annoyed with him.

His angry little bunny.

It had been months of your back and forth, there wasn’t a single moment of peace where you both mutually agreed on something.

“Will you fuck off” You deadpanned while Bucky corrected your fighting stance, moving your leg back and arms up.

“Just shut up and fix your form” Maybe I should fuck you instead-what. Bucky flicked off the rogue thought that slipped into his mind as you shuffled, brushing against his body, his muscles tensed with how close you were to him.

****

“Y/n!” Bucky shoved you out of the way, groaning when he felt the knife plunge into his side, dropping to his knees and falling onto the floor.

“Bucky!” You ran to his side, killing off the hydra agent within seconds before Steve and Sam came to his aid, whisking him off to the jet. You ran behind them, your heart hammering out of your chest while they helped him strip off his tac gear to give him stiches. You took over, insisting the other two could finish up the mission while you took care of Bucky; there was no way you’d be able to focus on anything else anyway. Not when he was hurt.

He groaned, lying down in pain but alert enough to see the way your eyes were glassy, worry etched on your face. You cut off the rest of his shirt, your breath hitching looking at all the dark bruises that littered his body, a few of those hits from shielding you.

“Baby” Your voice was hardly a whisper, not even realizing what you’d just called him, trying to hold yourself together so you could take care of him.

“Baby, huh?” Bucky smirking, wincing in pain while you applied pressure to his cut, stopping some of the bleeding before grabbing the med kit to stitch him up. “Can I finally be your baby now?”

“This doesn’t change anything Barnes” You snorted, bringing him to lie down on your lap while the Jet took off, your hand softly stroking his hair. “I still hate you” you rolled your eyes, trying to look as annoyed as possible but on the inside your stomach was doing flips.

“You love me” Bucky smirked, his heart beating a little faster because deep down he wished it were true. He wished there were more to all your petty squabbles.

“Hm” You shook your head, a hint of a smile flashing across your face before collecting yourself again. “Maybe”

Bucky bit his lip, nodding, not trusting himself to respond to that, closing his eyes and falling asleep.

Maybe.

Present

That was the story you thought he was telling her.

But that wasn't.

You’d never heard this story.

“The first day I ever saw your mama, I fell in love with her pretty smile, almost tripped on my own feet seeing her. Daddy was head over heels for her”

Your daughter’s cheeks looked like they were going to burst, smiling so hard, her eyes wide with amazement.

“What did you do daddy, did you make mommy smile? Did she fall heels over head for you too?!”

Bucky snorted, cuddling his baby close to his chest, kissing her chubby cheek.

“Uh huh, I wanted to be the reason she always smiled. You know Uncle Steve brought her to uncle Tony’s house and as soon as she walked in the door, I thought she was a princess”

“Mama’s pretty”

“Mhm, so pretty baby, I feel in love with all of her. Your mama was the kindest person I’ve ever met, she was always so sweet to daddy”

“What did she do?”

“You know how daddy gets scary dreams sometimes?”

“Uh huh”

Bucky’s nightmares had improved significally but they didn’t disappear. Instead of hiding that side of him from your daughter, you had insisted on letting her learn about it. Bucky had hesitated but you didn’t want him to have to hide any part of himself. Your sweet girl was the most understanding, and Bucky was thankful every single day that his daughter knew all parts of him.

“She’d make sure I was okay after, she’d check on me. She’s so smart and brave, when we go on missions, she’d take care of me, sometimes even uncle Steve, uncle Tony, uncle Sam, uncle Clint, aunty Nat”

“ALL OF THEM?!”

Bucky laughed, nodding while your baby grasped onto his shirt, fully engrossed in this story.

“All of them. But she was the nicest to daddy”

“Did she give you lots of hugs?”

“Sometimes even kisses”

“Daddyyy” Your daughter burst into a fit of giggles at the word kisses, nuzzling her face into his neck before pulling away with more questions. “So what did you do?!”

You didn’t even realize you were sniffling until Bucky and your baby girl both turned to you wide eyed when they saw your tear streaked face. You knew Bucky loved you. There was no doubt you were both madly in love with each other but you never heard his side of how he felt about you.

How he adored you from day one.

All the silly little things he did to get your attention.

How beautiful he found you.

How much it meant to him when you made sure he was okay.

Everything just made him fall hard for you all while you also fell in love with him.

Bucky ran over to you while your little one padded behind him, attacking you in a flurry of hugs and kisses.

“What’s wrong darling” Bucky cooed, wiping your tears away while you shook your head, scooping your baby in your arms. She kissed your face all over, grabbing your cheeks, concern etched on her face.

“Why is mama sad”

“Mommy isn’t sad baby” Her face scrunched while you laughed, leaning against your husband as he kissed the top of your head. “I’m happy. I heard daddy telling you a story”

Bucky grinned while your babygirl nodded immediately, her tiny hand tugging on Bucky’s sleeve.

“Daddy you didn’t finish!!!”

“Sorry bubba” Bucky turned to you, his heart filled with butterflies, it didn’t matter that you had already been married for 4 years, he was forever head over heels in love with you, “You want to hear the story too, doll?” Bucky smiled, brining you to cuddle with him on the couch, your daughter snuggled against his chest again.

“Tell us the story daddy!!”

“It all started when uncle Steve had a plan...”

Tags: @glxwingrxse @hungryyeyess @sebsgirl71479 @beabutterfly987 @teambarnes72 @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan @buggy14 @whimsyplaty92 @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec @pono-pura-vida @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog @happyt0exist @emmabarnes @bethyruth @matchat3a @cjand10 @getwellsoontana @cherryschaos @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @ashenc-blog @buckybarnessimpp @potatothots @goldylions @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog @kingfleury @peaches1958 @spiderman-stilinski @peaceinourtime82 @gublur @wintersmelodie @geeky-politics-46 @lolawassad @almosttoopizza @a-poor-gryffindork @alternativeprincess @buckycallsmeaslut @kamaria-sweet-writes @charmedbysarge @xnorthstar3x @kryoee7 @alina02 @gh0stgurl @polishprincess999 @jessybarnes @alltheficsiwant @chemtrails-club @eralen @carrotfantasimp

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elliesbelle · 1 year ago

Text

nobody compares to you

chapter 5

pairing: ellie x reader

synopsis: you're in your junior year of college and at a party, you run into the girl who broke your heart: ellie williams. despite the time it took to reset your life, will you risk a broken heart again for her?

content warnings: modern college au, cursing, angst, slight slut-shaming, brief mention of death, minors do not interact

word count: 2.3k

chapters: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen

series masterlist

my masterlist

i have a ko-fi if you like my work so much that you feel compelled to tip me ♡︎

the "nobody compares to you" spotify playlist

featuring the isa song “sometimes you lose your soulmates”

Present Day

Though you didn’t exactly enjoy Mondays, it was at least the one day of the week when you got to wake up naturally instead of at the crack of dawn. Your first class isn't until noon, so when you wake up at 9:30 in the morning, you decide to get your day started early.

You weren’t always the type of person to completely do themselves up just to go to class. Maybe in freshman year for the first few weeks, but you were a seasoned vet now. Most of the time, some leggings and a simple shirt or sweater sufficed. But after such a shitty weekend, you figure you could at least make yourself feel good by looking good.

After half an hour of getting ready, you look yourself over in the bathroom mirror. You smile, fairly satisfied with your appearance. Despite the cold breezes of Saturday night, the forecast called for a rare warm day. As a result, you allowed yourself a floral sundress, decorated with a puffy knitted, button-up jacket on top of it in case the season’s true weather decided to show. A pair of simple white sneakers finished your outfit; not the most stylish, but practically, you still had to walk around campus.

Your lips shine from the bit of lip gloss you’d applied. You’d only applied some light mascara on today (you figured that your Literature and Sexuality class did not warrant your bold, false eyelashes). You’d lightly painted your eyes with colours that complemented those of your sundress, blending them seamlessly onto your eyelids. As you did this, that one memory that was prodding you two days ago became clearer.

“I have no idea how you do that so naturally, dude.” Ellie’d said, watching you in awe from the foot of your bed.

Her ocean green eyes watched the meticulous strokes of your makeup brush applying eyeshadow to your lids. It was early on in your “friendship” and it was still a couple more weeks of her calling you “dude” before you became “babe” and “baby.”

“It’s not that hard, honestly. Just takes some practice.” You’d said, trying to keep your hand steady as you grew nervous under Ellie’s watchful gaze.

“Nah, it’s natural talent. You’re an artist.” She’d replied.

You’d scoffed, saying, “Ellie, all I’m doing is my makeup. You’re the actual artist, remember?”

“No,” She’d shaken her head. “I just draw. You’re the artist here.” She’d said decidedly, eyes full of admiration as she continued to stare.

You’d blushed furiously then, and you would continuously do so when you’d replay that memory the months following after.

But it was two years later and now, the memory instead has you staring at your reflection tight-lipped and frowning.

Why is she still everywhere?

It was roughly a fifteen to twenty-minute walk from your apartment to the university. You lived in an off-campus apartment complex that was in a decent location from both the school and a downtown area nearby. It was less convenient than living on campus like several of your friends still did, and this certainly wasn’t what you’d had in mind when you were planning out your social college experience. But after the freshman year events of Rafael’s death and Ellie’s abandonment, you were far more comfortable where you were.

You liked walking anyway. You found solace in the strolls you took, accompanied only by your thoughts and headphones.

About five minutes into your trek to campus, you pull out your phone to text your friend Tara.

A couple of minutes later, you were just officially entering the campus when Tara texts you back.

You continue walking as you frown down at your phone. Dina had spent most of the previous day at your place, cheering you up and taking your mind off Ellie. Your group chat with your other friends was blowing up and by the end of the night when Dina had left, you were overwhelmed by the amount of unread texts you had. The group chat remained unopened until right now.

The chat consisted of your friends Tara, Sidney, Astrid, Rebecca, Kristen, and Mina. You’d met them all in freshman year. Tara was your assigned roommate and Astrid was Dina’s. They were all initially casual friends, ones that you saw on a usual basis and got along well with, but they weren’t necessarily very close. You were better friends with the gang from Jackson. But after you came back to campus for sophomore year, you detached yourself slightly from Dina and Jesse, knowing full well that Ellie had them first. They both tried to remain closer to you; but they remained inseparable from their childhood best friend, not fully knowing what events led to what “broke up” you two. It wasn’t the same and it was a much different dynamic with this other friend group, but the girls were there for you all the same.

Reluctantly, you click on the group chat named “Wilson Crew ❤️‍🔥” (Wilson Valley had been the name of the freshman dorm building most of you had resided in the first year). Scrolling up to where you’d left off, you scan the messages your friends had left the previous day. Your eyes grow wider and wider the more you read.

The previous day, Tara, who worked at a campus coffee shop called Ruston Coffee, was tasked to train a new girl. To her, your other friends’, and now your shock, the new girl Tara was training was Freshman Girl. The same Freshman Girl who stayed glued to Ellie’s side for most of Saturday night. The same Freshman Girl who drooled over Ellie’s every word and move. The same Freshman Girl that mistook your Ellie’s signature lavender-laced joints as lilac. The same Freshman Girl who wore Ellie’s old motorcycle jacket the entire night.

It turned out Freshman Girl did have a name: Daniela. Your friends had sent messages with different levels of shock and horror. Kristen called her a whore, to which Sidney agreed, to which Astrid reprimanded and told them both to be nice. Mina sent memes as a response. Tara also texted that Daniela would be working with her again today.

You look up. Ruston Coffee is just down the way. You don't have to go in. You can skip coffee for today and hide out in the library instead.

“I’m not expecting you and Ellie to magically make up. I won’t try to get into the middle of it because I know that’s between you two. But you definitely need to figure out this out, babe. This doesn’t seem like something that should remain unresolved.” Dina’d said.

“But don’t also let it affect all the other parts of your life, okay?" She continued. "She shouldn’t be stopping you from hanging out with me and Jess more often or going out to parties we’re at or anything that involves Ellie in some way. Don’t let her stop you from enjoying your life.”

And Ellie certainly shouldn’t stop you from getting coffee. If you want to get a coffee and relax before class, Ellie should not be getting in the way of that.

You take a deep breath and march towards the coffee shop, fingers gripping tightly onto the straps of your backpack and feet stomping in rhythm to good 4 u by Olivia Rodrigo blasting loudly through your headphones.

A bell above the door tinkles as you enter Ruston Coffee. The shop was a little busy, most seats taken up by other students sitting with their laptops or biding time before class. There's a line of people by the register and you begin approaching it until you hear your name being called.

Your friend Tara waves you over by the counter where orders are usually dropped off. In one of her hands is a straw and your ready-made mocha frappe.

“You’re the literal best, Tara.” You sigh, pulling your headphones off and walking up to her.

She hands you your coffee order.

“No problem.” She says, smiling. “You know that I don’t mind.”

“Thank you for indulging in my caffeine addiction,” You say, whipping out your phone and sending her $6.

Tara frowns and says, “You better not have given me a $3 tip this time.”

You sip from your straw.

“Dude!” Tara reprimands, laughing.

“$2 tip!” You say, defensively.

“Just for a $4 coffee.” She chides, shaking her head.

You shrug.

“So uh,” Tara begins, her voice lowered slightly. “Did you see what I said in the group chat yesterday? Cause you weren’t responding.”

You gulp.

“Uhh. Yeah, I did, just now. Sorry, Dina was at my place yesterday, so I was busy—”

“Nah nah, it’s cool, man. But like. You saw what I said about that girl, right?”

“Is she here?” You ask, chewing the inside of your cheek.

“Not yet. But—” Tara checks her watch. “—she’s supposed to be here in less than five minutes or so.”

Fuck.

“Oh, okay.” You gulp, your heart rate increasing.

“Are you okay, dude?” Tara asks.

“No, yeah, I’m fine.” You lie. “How did training her yesterday go?”

Tara crosses her arms and rolls her eyes.

“Literally the worst. She kept on looking at her phone instead of listening, she left one AirPod in her ear the whole time, she kept asking when we were gonna be done. And now I have to go through it all again once she gets here.”

You give Tara a sympathetic look.

“I hate that,” You say, sucking on your teeth. “Can’t you just, I don’t know, not hire her?”

“We’re short-staffed as fuck, so we don’t have much of a choice.” Tara sigh.

One of Tara’s co-workers comes up behind her and attempts to elbow her ribs which she dodges easily.

“Get back to work, Maclay.” He says, putting down two cups of coffee next to her before heading back towards the register.

“Fuck off, Khanh!” She replies, shooting a middle finger to his back.

“Should I let you get back to work?” You ask.

“Nah,” Tara reassures. “I wanna shit talk this Daniela girl first before I have to deal with her this morning.”

“Do you know how often she’s gonna be working with you?” You inquire.

“I’m not sure yet, but if Bonnie thinks she’s gonna stick me with a lazy new girl this early in the year—”

You hear the bell above the door tinkle as someone enters the coffee shop. Both you and Tara look instinctively at the new arrival. Tara groans silently and your throat goes dry.

Freshman Girl Daniela walks in. Wearing Ellie’s jacket once again.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Crap, I gotta go now, I guess.” Tara whines begrudgingly.

“Y-yeah…” You say, unable to take your eyes off of that same jacket that used to often adorn your shoulders back in your freshman year. You hate that it looked good on Daniela.

“I’ll see you later, dude.” Tara says, wrenching her elbows off the counter and walking towards the register.

“Good luck.” You reply.

You aren't exactly subtle with your stare, but thankfully Daniela doesn't seem to notice. It's a little different seeing her now in the daytime. She was very pretty, you have to admit to yourself. She has a short, pixie cut that complements her sharp bone structure. She's wearing a bright yellow tank top below Ellie’s jacket that clings to her lean figure, making her stand out slightly. The light makeup she has on looks so simple and natural.

Daniela wasn’t Ellie’s first conquest since you ended things with her. She didn’t waste much time dating around after you all came back for your sophomore year. You’d avoided her as much as possible so you wouldn't have to come face-to-face with the girls she’d get involved with. You still heard about them, of course, and you were sure there were even more than the ones you’d known about.

But Daniela was the first you were forced to encounter. You weren’t prepared to be thrust right into Ellie’s love life once more. But here you are, staring at the most recent fling of the girl who you were once so desperately in love with.

As Daniela lazily makes her way through the shop towards the back, you eventually tear your eyes off her and head straight for the exit.

♫ Maybe she’ll come through / If he waits some more

But she doesn’t / No, she doesn’t ♫

You're leaning against one of the trees in the quad, backpack laid next to you and headphones back on your ears. Your next class is in the building right behind you, but you still have a while until it started.

♫ It’s not like the movies / Like you dream it’ll be

Sometimes you lose your soulmates / And sometimes they leave ♫

Your journal and pen are laid out on your lap but abandoned as your fingers pick at the grass around you. Your mostly empty coffee cup sits next to you, condensation dripping into the soil. Your eyes are completely glazed over, watching the clouds in the sky.

♫ She’s not a girl you forget / She’ll run through your head

With all of the moments / You loved but now dread

To remember / Burning like—♫

Your hands and voice react quicker than your mind does. Your sudden movements cause your headphones to fall onto your neck. After a second, you realize that you had shrieked and that your hands had flown up to your face to catch something. As you bring the object down to look at it, you realize it was a football.

“Shit! I’m so sorry!”

You look up to see a tall girl in a dark t-shirt and grey sweatpants jogging towards you, a dirty blonde braid bouncing behind her.

“Abby?”

author's notes:

sorry for the delay in uploading this! i'm back from my brief vacation, and after i settled in after getting home, i almost immediately plopped down in front of my laptop to finalize this ldksfjsdlkds

not very chockful of ellie in this chapter, i know, i'm sorry! y'all got plenty last chapter! but don't worry, more will be coming up soon. i just enjoy keeping y'all in suspense.

i just wanna mention that most (if not all) of the names that i use in this fic are picked out people in the games themselves. also tara's last name is maclay as an homage to my lesbian queen tara maclay from buffy the vampire slayer. she's not the same character obvi, but i just enjoy putting in the reference :)

freshman girl aka daniela may have been named after and based on some whore girl that my ex left me for and that i'm still bitter about it oops

i hope y'all enjoyed the surprise guest appearance at the end of this chapter! she will be integrated further into the story from this point on, so stayed tuned :)

taglist: @lonelyfooryouonly, @elliesinterlude, @sawaagyapong, @peppesgirl, @iconsoft, @maybeidohaveadhd, @ellieswifee, @valiantllamapersonpony-blog, @nil-eena, @echostinn, @uraesthete, @softbunlvr, @cherriessxinthespring, @amitycat, @chrissyfishywissy, @yevheniiaaa, @machetegirl109, @bertandfearnie, @ximtiredx, @efam, @elliesnoviecita, @oatmilkchaii, @tayyyystan, @emothurman, @livvy-2000, @abigaillovestoread, @gold-dustwomxn, @liabadoobee, @yuckyfucky

#nobody compares to you series #ellie williams #dealer!ellie #ellie x reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #the last of us #tlou #the last of us part 2 #tlou2 #ellie fanfiction #Spotify #audio #belle speaks #v #belle writes

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pascalsbby · 1 year ago

Text

CARNAL / 5: All Is Fair In Love & War

Chapter 4 / Masterlist

Summary: 5.5K/ f!reader, dark!joel, bfd!joel, brat tamer!joel

“You were infiltrating his space, now. You stayed still, and she mumbled something. You pressed, “keep watching” on the screen and let the TV voices drown out your reality- the one in which Joel is awake, unknowing that you’re in his house and in his daughters bed.”

Warnings: 18+ mdni, SMUT, age gap, knife play, lil bit of blood play, breath play, choking, he takes what he wants, dominate & aggressive joel, pet names, praise kink, p in v sex, face fucking, dirty talk <3, he talks you through it, tells you what to do- the usual pure filth + a little more this time.

A/N: SHIT’S HAPPENING! I got a little carried away. Lemme know what you think, please? 🤍

“How do you love?”

“Like a fist. Like a knife.”

- Ada Limón

°:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *₊.• ♡ °:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡ °:. *₊ ° *

You had surrendered the recollection of what it felt like to be touched, held, a long time ago. For the person touching you to feel you for themselves, too.

A delicate pass, the very essence of tenderness has materialized into his calloused fingertips. Small hairs from his beard kissing your skin, just as his lips brush up and down your neck. He’s breathing into you, the condensation is warm, making your own sweat drip. Lips whispering, gliding along the delicate curve of your neck, his movement like a goddamn poem.

His fingers dipping into your depth, wet from prodding in your mouth.

Pleasure and pain, almost annoyance at how good it feels. It tickles. It feels wrong, even. Joel dips down and licks your sweat pooling in a tucked-in spot between your collar bones.

It feels heavy with guilt. It feels safe. His thick arms are holding you against his body, he’s making promises in your ear.

It’s not real, though- it’s a dream. A dream you’ve been having for days, over and over. But it never really leaves when you wake, either.

It’s what Joel felt like- will feel like when you meet again. The familiar gnawing in your chest aches. Where does the feeling of him end, and I begin? Am I finally lost within? I’d stay here forever. Maybe that’s what I was meant for… to be lost in the chest of a man in my own brain.

9:45pm, sat on either side of Sarah’s bed in her still-pink room that she’d outgrown years ago.

“Dad says he’ll repaint it once I promise I’ll stay here until I graduate, during the summers at least,” she had said. “I guess that gives me more time to see you since you’ll be here now too.” You corrected her, “Until I can move out of my parent’s house again. Maybe I’ll just live here, it’s better than going back there.” Sarah frowned at the joke, knowing what you had shared about your family to her.

What were you doing? Joking about staying here. This was Joel’s house. He was asleep two doors down. Now wasn’t the best time to be making jokes, but it felt easier than trying to face what was truly happening.

Sarah had promised he was sleeping whenever you snuck through the back door, putting her finger to her lips to quiet you when you were suddenly falling over the molding on the way in the door. You’d never been one for graceful movements.

She held in her giggles all the way until her door was closed, though.

“Were you trying to wake the sleeping bear?”

“Maybe,” you giggled.

And that was the truth. You were terrified, but you wanted him to know you were here.

You were angry at him, but you wanted him. You wanted to see his room, not through a computer screen on a cam website- but in person. You wanted to be near him.

You were infiltrating his space, now.

°:. *₊ ° . ° .• ♡

It had been 6 days since Joel had shown his face. It had also been 6 days and few minutes less whenever he had left the bathroom you two shared. He decided not to share his plan with you, once again. You were a puppet in his game.

‘Break with him? For him?’ You had, momentarily on the bathroom floor. The sobs were clawing their way out unmercifully, but you also didn’t want to stop them. You had believed what he told you. He held you like a little girl, arms wrapped around you in safety. And you had listened and believed. Why? When has a man ever followed through in their promises to you?

He had left you in the bathroom, fending for yourself on how to clean up the mess he made. He had cleaned up the visible mess of your cum, his, sure, but not what he awoke inside of you.

You looked into the mirror and formed a half smile, looking at the faint shadow of where your mascara had been running.

Your neck was red where he’d wrapped his hand around you.

You took a few more deep breaths and then patted down your dress. There, on the inside of your thigh was his fingertips, branded into your body from force.

You wanted to tattoo him on your body, make him permanent. But you also wanted to scream and throw a fit against his chest. You felt like a child.

When you got tired of looking into your own eyes, you went to go face the truth.

Sarah had found you first, immediately boring into you. Her face was disappointed, frowning. You knew in that moment that she was gone, months of friendship thrown away.

She knew, she knew that there was something going on between you and Joel. She knew you fucked him in that bathroom. She knew he’d been paying you to ruin yourself for him.

You waited for a sharp pain, a crying voice, something.

She quickened her pace and ran to you after she could see that physically, you were fine. But she didn’t hit you. She wrapped you in her arms and the breath you had been unknowingly holding, released. She whispered to you, still holding you tight.

Suddenly the world was spinning, for probably the fifth time that night. But when was the last time you felt like you were standing on solid ground, anyways?

“Dad told me, I’m so sorry, I had no idea or I would have beat his ass myself, I swear to God.” She released from the hug and held you at arms length, looking you over.

You’ve never been a good liar, praying that your eyes wouldn’t give it away. ‘I’m fucking your dad.’

She looked like Joel in that moment, sounded like him. Concerned, brow set downward.

Joel was standing a few feet away, facing you while Sarah’s back was to him. He was smiling ever-so-lightly here and there as your family talked at him, his eyes lifted from his dad’s face to you. You imagined your eyes were wide, still red from tears, from being handled by him… fucked into the concrete wall.

Your eyes returned to Sarah as she started again.

“I didn’t know you were seeing anyone! How could you not tell me! I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I know this isn’t the time. I just thought you would have told me that he wasn’t treating you right, that he was supposed to be here on your big day. I’m sorry.” She said again, softer, realizing she was getting worked up about the ‘wrong’ part of the story, and you probably couldn’t handle that energy at the moment.

You dared look at Joel again, the indention between his brows was visible for a few moments, he nodded his head towards you, looking at you through his eyelashes after looking down at his feet. Play along. Stop choking. Stop starin’.

You returned to her gaze, as she waited for your response.

God damnit, answer her…. C’mon Birdie.

You could still feel his fingers in the back of your throat.

“Sarah, I’m so sorry. I just thought it would turn out differently. He seemed so sweet and interested in me and that usually doesn’t happen so I ju-“

She cut you off, shhhh’ing you.

“We don’t have to talk about it right now. This mystery man has spent too much of your time tonight.”

He had told your parents the same story, and they believed him. So much so they didn’t even care to ask you anything, all you got was a “sorry” nod from your mom. Your dad was too busy talking to other family members, probably telling them how hard he worked to get you here.

And yet again, here you were, the victim in a string of lies that weren’t even your own.

The story was simple: you had been seeing some guy for a few months and invited him here to meet your parents on your big night. He didn’t show- and when Sarah came in all excited talking about Chase, it made you upset. Joel followed you because he thought you were upset that he was there without notice, and he didn’t want to worry anyone else in the gallery by bringing your parents into it.

It was good. Why are you surprised? You knew he was a good liar. All your fucking encounters had been premeditated- even today. Maybe even this one, in where he sticks his fingers inside of you and fucks you to tears, then blames it on some other guy.

But it didn’t surprise you how quickly they fell under his spell. You did the same, and all it took was whispered filth in his deep, vibrating voice. All it took was his fist wetly wrapped around his throbbing cock.

Your emotions were never really taken into consideration, and this was another one of those moments- but this time you were grateful. No one asked questions about the mystery asshole again. Except for Sarah.

That’s how you ended up in his house, in her bedroom. You felt like you owed her the ‘truth’ of what happened between you and mystery boy.

You wish the real mystery boy wasn’t her dad. Why couldn’t he have been the neighbor, or some professor from school? You’d never really looked at older men in this manner, before Joel.

Shame was growing deeper amidst the entanglement of lies you felt like you’d eventually get stuck in.

And they were sticking to you, the lies. Thick, heavy. They played themselves over and over in your dreams, dancing in circles and spinning webs.

He whispered to you, “Mine. Mine. Mine, Birdie.” But just in your dreams. You had wings and he washed them gently, petting and taking care of you.

She had texted you at least a hundred times since that night, asking about this guy, wanting to know every detail. So you decided it was best to see her in person, tell her whatever story you could come up with on the spot and then hopefully hear nothing about it again.

“Maybe… maybe I scared him away? I don’t do well with things needing me, or being close to me. Maybe it’s externalized resentment towards the world for having been born as the ‘older sister’ in a broken home, or for having to be the parent of my parents, the house, myself. I don’t like dogs jumping on me and licking me, I don’t like the grabby hands of children, I hate when my mother asks me a question that she could easily figure out herself,” you finish, out of breath from quickly trying to get your thoughts out before they left. Or maybe before you realized who you were telling your secrets to.

And that was the truth. You knew you’d been a shit friend to Sarah. You couldn’t see it getting any better from here, but you also somehow knew what would be worse: losing him even though he wasn’t even yours. He felt lodged in your chest like he was an integral part of your body and its ability to work.

“I think that makes sense,” she nods. “You were in survival mode, you didn’t have enough energy for extra anything- including relationships or extra overstimulation. That’s how dad is, too. I’ve begged him for years to acknowledge the pain, but then put it down for a while. Or let someone hold it with him, at least. He grew up similarly to you, I think.” She pondered on. “I think he would do well with someone caring for him. You too.”

“Uh…” you stuttered, “yeah. He seems like he’s had a rough go at it. From what you’ve told me at least. I remember him being sad that summer he worked on the shed, too, but I guess I just assumed it was cause you weren’t there n’ he missed you. I don’t remember a lot of it though, to be honest.”

“‘Don’t know,” she trails, “he’s always been like that. Even before the divorce. He’s been a hell of a lot happier this six months though. He says he doesn’t know why, just ‘feels lighter.’ I assume he’s seein’ someone, just won’t tell me who. Probably Ms. Tammi down the street… he always eyes her when she’s workin’ in the garden. She’s too young for him though, she’s like 35,” She scoffs.

Damn.

35 is a helluva lot better than 24. But this isn’t the time or place to have that conversation.

Sarah continues on, quickly changing the subject and falling into other conversations as you listen intently, happy to not be at the receiving end of questions at the moment.

You can’t help but wonder what Ms. Tammi looks like. It fades quickly, though.

That’s how the majority of the night went, and you were happily exhausted by it all. The nodding, “yes!”’s and “I agree. I agree”’s, the giggling, the comfort in the face of it all.

Around 3am you both settled down and she gave you a blanket that smelled like their home. It was soft, warm. Sarah put New Girl on and she was out in 5 and a half minutes. You always fell asleep last at sleepovers, unsurprisingly. You didn’t sleep well as it is.

Her room was comfy. Boxes were still littered around from what she brought home for the summer. Her pink walls radiated the soft glow and heat of the lamps. Her TV was dancing across the walls, casting shadows. Her windows were open, welcoming in the cooler, muggy night. Cicadas were still singing their lullabies.

Her walls were adorned with proof that she had been taken care of, loved. Pictures of Joel throughout their life, littered under string lights.

She’d always been a photographer, ever since Joel put her first camera in her hand when she was 5. Sarah had lit up talking about it a few hours earlier. She took the family pictures on their vacations- meaning, she attempted to squeeze her and Joel into the frame, considering how much shorter her arms were than his. He let her, not too worried that half of his face was cut out.

“Always knew you were gonna be somethin’ special, kid.” He had told her.

There were the ones of just him, too. Black and white speckled film. He was turned to the side in one, his profile taking up the whole shot, looking forward. He was younger then, more clean shaven and… just smaller. He looked lighter in a different regard. Happier, maybe.

He looked beautiful, but not the way he does now. The years are present in the fine lines of his face- they are there to tell his story. One you didn’t even know yet but wanted to drown in.

The testament to how much Sarah loved Joel was right here. The proof of how much he loves her, staring back. She had a safe childhood, you think.

And you’re jealous because you can see it; the difference in the two of you. No, you don’t want to be like Joel’s daughter in that way… you just… hate having to admit to yourself that the time for that has passed. Your dad never showed up in that way, and he never would.

He wasn’t the one who covers your cuts and carries you to your bed when you fell asleep watching one of his cowboy shows on Saturday night. He was the type of dad that screamed your weaknesses back at you, stabbing through you- except this time through your back and into your chest; not even looking you in the eyes while hurting the little girl within you, again. And again. And again-

Back to Joel, please. You begged your mind. Your hands were shaking, too. The soft hum of Sarah sleeping next to you brought you back. You hate that it makes your heart swell that much more, the fact he took such good care of her. Such good care that she doesn’t have any inkling of what’s going on between her two favorite people.

She’s sleeping peacefully in a place that’s never been a war zone, and yet here you were. Who would be the first causality?

You drift off eventually, uncomfortable at first because you don’t want to move her bed too much, waking her. Eventually you sleep, and you sleep peacefully despite the elephant on your chest. Despite the war on the horizon.

Perhaps this was the best sleep you’d had in years, even. You felt safe in her safety, in Joel’s.

You dreamt about him again, this time he was bleeding.

And then a crashing in the kitchen followed by a muffled “fuck” caused you to gasp out of your nightmare, and Sarah stirred to your entire body stiffening.

You stayed still, and she mumbled something. You pressed, “keep watching” on the screen and let the TV voices drown out your reality- the one in which Joel is awake, unknowing that you’re in his house and in his daughters bed.

But God, you have to pee. He scared the shit out of you. You raised off the bed slowly, making sure not to wake her. It had been five or so minutes since the sound, and nothing else had happened. He’s probably getting ready for work, you convinced yourself.

On a Saturday?

You check your phone to see if he had texted you. 5:46am. A new habit you’d formed in the past week since your last encounter. Nothing. Still.

So you tiptoed to the door and cracked it, letting the light from the TV guide you. Her bathroom was three doors down, she had told you earlier in the night. There was a nightlight on, too. You could see it pouring out from under the door.

No other lights in the house, or at least upstairs, seemed to be on. Joel had either left for work or went back to bed, whatever he was doing seemed done.

You cursed at yourself for not bringing your phone with you to use as a light, but it was one long hallway… you could do it. Deep breaths.

You made it halfway when you heard something downstairs and practically peed yourself right then, hurrying your footsteps to the nearest door. You opened it and backed in, looking at the stairs and down the hallway for any sign that he might have seen you.

Nothing. And then a breath that wasn’t yours.

“Oh, now you’re breakin’ and enterin’ into my house? Couldn’t stay away, huh? Coulda just called, Birdie.”

There’s no fucking way.

“Came to see Sarah and didn’t even say hi to your daddy? Mmm, what a shame.” You imagined he was shaking his head, but you couldn’t see too much from the fucking wrong night light in the corner of the wrong fucking room.

“Thought you were gonna be a good girl ‘n lay low for a while?”

You turned around, slowly, and there he was. He was in boxers, laying in the bed you’d seen him fuck himself into. It smelled like him in here, too. The sheets were slept in, the same color as the ones he would shoot his spend into, grunting and calling you pretty names.

He was grinning, not even startled by the fact you were somehow standing in his room at 6am.

Lay low? That plan was never shared with you.

Heat washed over you, embarrassment maybe. You wanted to be needed by him, wanted to be grabbed, licked, kissed, handled. You’ve been waiting for him, but he hasn’t reached out. You wanted him to hold you like he held you in that bathroom, except this time you wanted him to push your face into his sheets while he did.

“Answer me,” he growled. He couldn’t have been up for long, his voice still heavy with sleep. It was lower in tone, deeper.

“I’m trying to be a good girl Joel, I-I was just looking for the ba-“

“No. A good girl wouldn’t fuck her best friends dad, n’ call him daddy while doin’ it. She wouldn’t come over and sleep in her bed, just to sneak into her dad’s room, doin’ and lookin’ for god knows what.”

He was enjoying this. He was just as much to blame- no, he was THE person to fucking blame for this.

“That’s fucking unfair, Joel. I came over here to try and put a patch over loose ends that you left whenever you left me in the floor of that bathroom,” you huffed, teary-eyed and still stunned, still sleepy. “I didn’t- I don’t, wanna hurt her.”

He stopped grinning then, sitting up. He didn’t lift his feet off the ground, but you were scared he might.

You felt like that same, scared little girl who was being punished and yelled at for letting a tear slip. But he was fucked just as much as you if this went public, and it emboldened you. You knew he didn’t want to hurt her either.

“You know what’s unfair?” You pointed at him, continuing in his silence.

“You. That I finally made a friend who is so good- so good- and you stalk me? You find me and you use me for some perverted pleasure that your wife didn’t give you, n now I have to pick up the pieces and lie to my best friend?”

He was face-to-face with you, staring down at you, waiting for you to dare open your mouth again. And then, his hand was around your neck and he was forcing you to look into his eyes.

“You don’t know ‘nothin’ ‘bout my ex-wife, don’t ever bring her up again. ‘Specially when you’re standing in my house, in my god damn bedroom. Got it?”

“No.” You gasped out.

His grip tightened.

“No?” He spat in disbelief.

“‘Musta forgot who you answer to. Didn’t know your pussy would forget so fast who she belongs to. Don’t make me put you back in your place, sweetheart.”

His nose meets yours, the hug of your face, faster than his lips. He nudges, wanting more. Sucking, teeth hitting teeth in a want to be as close to each other as possible. He goes for the bottom lip, always, tucking the side of his nose under yours. Gently. Then he returns to your lips and bites down, searching for blood. He get its, and he chuckles.

You gasped into his mouth.

“You need me to ruin you, huh?” He whispered into your hair as he pulled your head to the side, making it easier to suck on your neck. He was nipping at your jaw, licking lines like he had in your dreams. His hands were engulfing you and all you could do was stand there and take it, sucking the pain away from your own lips. Rough palms feeling at you.

You let out a plea for more.

“That’s why you came lookin’ for me? Sweet girl,” he purred, “couldn’t stay away? Want me to take care of you, stretch that tight hole around daddy’s cock, hmm?”

That hit a nerve, deep. You wanted to surrender yourself and hide in his arms. From the world, Sarah, yourself. You wanted to believe what he had whispered to you in the bathroom, you wanted to break against him and rest your bones.

But first, you wanted him to sink his teeth into you. To ruin you. And then maybe he would stick around this time and pick up the pieces.

He was solid, sturdy, safe. You reached up and put your hand on top of his, letting him know this is what you want, giving him the ‘okay’.

He didn’t even need to ask you, you walked closer to his bed and laid yourself over it, ass up, giving yourself to him. He sighed in lust, watching you sink into his sheets, spreading your smell onto them. You turned your head and laid your cheek against the soft, looking up at him.

You spread your legs and struggled out of your shorts, he stepped towards you and ripped them off. You were taking too long. The room was silent, save for both of your breathing.

“This what you needed?” The bed squeaked under you as he pulled you towards the end of and ordered you on your knees. He lined himself up with your core and spit after kissing your cunt with his tip.

The spit hit your pussy, tickling its way down as it dripped. He took his fingers to it, pushing it around and then into your hole. He used it to wet the head of his cock, too.

“That’s it, sweetheart,” he coos at you, grabbing for the nape of your neck, pulling your hair and hence your head back towards him. It hurt so good, and your neck was at an angle that made it harder for your chest to rise and fall.

He slid into you at the same instance, and the breath you were halfway through caught in your throat, your whole body reacting to his length. Your eyes were watering from the intrusion, from the pain and simultaneous pleasure. He put his palm against your mouth, muting whatever scream had just come out.

And he fucks you while you grunt out sounds each time he hits that spot inside of you. Your eyes roll back, then focus again. His hand blocking not only your mouth but your nose. Your stomach is tighter, trying to fit his size. He’s breathing heavy above you, sweat dripping and falling onto your back, not realizing that he’s cutting off your air supply.

He’s doing what he said he would all of those times, fulfilling the promises he had made. It’s different now than in the bathroom. He was angry then, but he wasn’t in the comfort of his own home. He could do whatever he pleased, now. Sarah under the cover of the whispering TV in her room.

He throws his hips to yours, each one tearing moans from your throat. “There you go.” And suddenly you were seeing faint white lights in the corner of your vision. But you don’t care, you were just tired, blissed out. You felt comfortable under the weight of him, fucking into you. You relaxed and took what he was giving you. Over and over an-

His voice was muffled. He repeated himself.

“Hey, breathe for me, pretty thing.” And you do, forgetting it for a moment. He reached his wrist in front of you, taking your neck between his thumb and pointer finger. “Lemme feel you breathe baby. Gotta listen t’ me.” You sucked in what you could, and he ‘uh huh’ed you, feeling your neck contract and take in the air. “That’s right, just like that. Can’t have you passin’ out on me baby girl. Not there yet.”

He went slower for a moment, aware that he almost suffocated you. But he didn’t stop, and you were glad. He pulled out and decided he’d choke you with his cock, instead. You whimpered at the loss of him from inside of you, but you knew what he wanted and you wanted to give it to him.

You slipped from the bed to the ground, finding it harder to move and get on your knees than you thought. He’d fucked you silly, shaking, raw.

“Can I feel it? Let me feel it.” Ordering, more than allowing, the tip of his cock passed your lips and went straight for the back of your throat. You coughed him out, just for him to return again, dripping your saliva.

“Shhh, shhh, shhhh,” he whispered, grabbing fistfuls of hair on both sides of your head as he fucked his hips into your mouth, relentlessly. You felt something warm, wet drip from you and hit the ground next to your splayed legs beneath you.

“Cumming with my cock in your mouth? Knew you were a’ bad girl.” He was breathless, shocked at how you were letting him play with you, limp, almost. Fucked out. On the verge of passing out.

You didn’t know how many times your stomach had tightened and then released. How many times you came for him. You stopped counting after two, unable to do much of anything. Not wanting to be anything, then the person under his touch. Full of him.

And then you were wearing him again, bent over the edge of his bed, hips hurting from hitting the edge of the mattress.

“Joel,” you managed, “pl- please.”

“Now you’re talkin’? Couldn’t get any words out before. Poor baby. What do you need from me?”

“Hurts, Joel.”

He liked that.

“Want me to stop, then?”

“No,” your voice was hoarse.

“Then what do you need? Can’t give it to ya if you ain’t able to say it.”

“Inside. Cu- oh fuck- cum inside me. Please. Please, please.”

He liked the sound of you begging for him to fill you up.

“N’ whose cunt is this, baby? Who do you want to cum inside you?” And those filthy words pulled another orgasm from your hips.

“Your-“ you mumbled.

“Louder. Use those pretty words you know from goin’ ta school.”

“Yours Joel. This pussy is yours, s’all yours.”

“What a good girl.”

He halted as deep as he could inside of you with a groan, growl-like, and he filled you with his warmth.

He stayed inside, afterwards. Not wanting any of his spend to go to waste outside of your womb.

You didn’t say anything, fighting the urge to just fall asleep where you were, in the comfort of his bed. But you didn’t cry, either. And that was a first. He completely defiled you, yet you weren’t breaking under his touch. You felt like, even if it was fleeting, he broke you and then put you back together right. The correct way.

He pulled out and grunted, and suddenly you felt a soft cloth wiping at your core. He placed soft kisses up and down your shoulders and back as he cleaned you up, your goosebumps the only reaction you gave as you closed your eyes.

A few minutes passed.

“Do you trust me?” He whispered, running his hands up and down your bare skin.

“Mhmm,” you let out.

“Look at me, Birdie. Need to hear it.”

You rolled over, more awake from the serious tone in his voice.

“Yes, Joel, I trust you.” But he didn’t looked like he believed you.

“Want you to do somethin’ for me.”

“Whatever you want.” Your patience was wearing thin, you just wanted to curl up and sleep, surrounded by him, surrounded by the smell of him, the safety.

You felt heavy.

He lifted himself off of the bed but you didn’t follow where he went, you caught yourself falling asleep again, so you slightly shook your head in an effort not to.

He returned and a hissing sound sprung through the air. Then immediately, something hard, cold, wet maybe? Slid across your skin. His weight was weighing down the bed as he sat back down next to you.

He moved your hair out of your face, rested your cheek against his palm and spoke clearly.

“Want my initials here, baby.” He was holding a switchblade against the inside of your thigh. “Remind you who you belong to while we figure s’all out.”

You were awake now.

He kept the blade there, but his eyes found yours, searching for an answer, praying you wouldn’t get up and run from him.

Instead, you took his wrist and moved it even closer to your core, on the inside of your thigh.

“How ‘bout… here?”

“S’perfect.”

He got off the bed then, sinking to his knees as he settled you comfortably on your back.

The birds were chirping through the window, the orange sun slipping past the blinds and onto his bed, streaking over his face. You welcomed the pain, if it felt anything like his pleasure. You trusted him. And you know you shouldn’t, but who is going to stop you?

He kissed up your legs, starting by leaving wet marks on the back of your knees. He made it to your nude mound and kissed it, too. Gently, soft.

“You sure?” He asked, for once, giving you an out if you wanted it.

“M’ sure, Joel.” He sighed at the sound of his name leaving your lips, sleepily. He reached your thigh and settled the blade comfortably in his hands.

He kissed you one more time in the spot he had chosen, and then he carved his initials into your body, slowly. Painfully. You hissed.

“Want me t’ stop?” He asked.

“No. It feels good.”

It felt like your own version of love, one both of you shared together, secretly.

The warmth spreed as his tongue followed the blood down your thigh, catching it before it fell to his sheets.

Taglist: @strang3lov3 @leeeesahhh @blackvelveteen1339 @huffle-punk @xxmr-potato-headxx @ssssc0m @paleidiot @sarap-77 @marchai @morallyinept @i-love-rafe @silkiers @gracevnn @scarletsloveletter @smol-beb @loriensasylum

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magics-neptunes-things · 7 months ago

Text

One Love (6)

Hi guys :)

This is the new one for my Luna's serie. I hope you will enjoy it, please let me know what you thought about it :)

TW : Injury, blood, surgery.

(1) | (2) | (3) | (4) | (5) | (6) | (7) | (8)

It was a summer break. Everything is supposed to be fine; Lucy and Ona were supposed to be enjoying her holidays, but there is something bothering Lucy for days now. And it has nothing to do with the surgery she had some days ago for her knee and being able to play at least one more year. She was looking to be able to play at the next World Cup to be honest. Only Ona knew it because she didn’t say anything to someone else.

And Ona was taking so good care of her. She was even more gentle and caring than ever, even if her usual nature makes her be. Lucy has seriously started to ask herself if her girlfriend have the ability to read her mind. Because, sometimes, she just thinks about something and several seconds after, Ona is asking if she wants that precise thing. The first time she thought it was the hazard, but living with it constantly since days now, it’s a little bit scary.

Because of the surgery, she has an impressive amount of kiss, hugs and massages, which she really doesn’t mind. She doesn’t have the right to go swimming for now, but just sitting by the pool with her feet in it while looking at her girlfriend in the water is enough for her happiness.

That’s exactly what she was doing at this moment. Because of the surgery, they didn’t go to Menorca or another place, Lucy needs to rest and it was obvious that Ona wouldn’t let her do something stupid. When she comes to Lucy, Ona doesn’t take support on Lucy’s knees like she usually did. She put her arms on the edge of the swimming pool and let her cheek rest on one of her arms to look at her girlfriend.

“Are you alright?” Ona asks gently.

“I’m fine” Lucy responds, even if her mind was spiraling some seconds ago. “I’m a little hot maybe.”

“You’re always hot” Ona smirks.

Lucy snorts and look at the Spaniard getting out the pool. Coco and Narla are both laying somewhere in the garden in the shadow of a palm tree. It’s hot today, Lucy’s right.

“Where are you going?” Lucy asks while looking at Ona.

“Taking you something to drink. You have to stay hydrate, mi Vida.”

“Don’t go inside with your feet wet, you’re going to make marks on the floor.”

Ona mimics her while getting up, making Lucy laughs slightly. The English woman hit Ona’s thigh with her hand in a playful way in return. Ona could have let things like this, but just when Lucy turns back, the youngest leans over her to wring her long hair, dripping fresh water into Lucy’s back.

Lucy yelps, making jump the two dogs who should definitively be used to these kinds of fights.

“You’re so dead, Batlle.”

Ona giggles, running into the house. She loses time opening the door of the safety gate surrounding the pool, allowing Lucy time to get up. The dark-haired woman chases Ona inside and she’s sure that she almost heard Narla sighs before she lays down again.

“Your feet!” Lucy shout to Ona when the Spaniard reach the inside of the house and she sees footprints on the floor.

Of course, Ona slips. But, by a miracle-like reflex, Lucy managed to catch her before she bumped her head on the ground. The team would have been mad to learn that their player got a concussion while fooling around her house.

“Are you going to torture me with kisses?” Ona asks with a smirk, standing up again.

“No. More like I will torture you not kissing you.”

“What? Lucy you can’t do that!”

********

Several hours later, both of them are laying on one lounge chair. To apologize, Ona made Sangria and with some crisps it’s even better. Minding Lucy’s injured knee, Ona is still wrapped around Lucy. Who definitively kissed her several times despite her treats.

“We should make it one for when our parents met what do you think?”

Lucy immediately tenses up when Ona addresses the subject that has worried her terribly since several days. At first, she thought that’s it was great idea, her parents meeting Ona’s parents, her brothers getting along together with her nephew and her niece in the middle of all that. But now she’s scared as hell. What if something goes wrong? They don’t even speak the same language.

“No?”

Ona’s voice takes Lucy back in reality and she looks at her girlfriend with a fake smile.

“Yeah”

“What’s going on?”

Ona frowns slightly. Of course she realizes that something was on her girlfriend’s mind. She just doesn’t know what.

“Nothing, I’m just… What if our family don’t get along?”

Ona seems so surprised that Lucy almost regret having talked about her fears. At least they would have one to be optimistic about this diner.

“Why won’t they get along?” Ona asks.

“At first because they don’t talk the same language? I know that your brother can talk English and that you can translate if something’s needed to, but how the hell are they suppose to talk together?”

Lucy is agitated, Ona can tell. That means that her fears are real and Ona is talking with her most soothing voice when she answers.

“Like you said, our brothers get along well so it’s a pretty good start. I’m sure that your nephew and your niece will be a great entertainment if things are a little tense at first. But I don’t think it will be that way.”

Lucy hums, letting Ona’s stroke on her arm calm her a little bit.

“Plus, their sons get along well, but their daughters get along pretty well too”

Ona said smirking, kissing lovingly Lucy’s neck. It was another attempt to help Lucy to relax, but she feels the English woman’s body tense again.

“Oh my god. Are they like no sex before marriage or something?!”

Ona bursts of laughing this time, pushing a little on her arms to sit down and have a better look at Lucy. Hearing Ona’s high laugh makes Lucy smile and Ona is almost crying laughing when she talks again.

“Do you think they would have let me play football and will still talking to me if they were conservative or something? Have you seen me?” Ona giggles. “You are the first of my girlfriend they have met, but they knew I had others before you.”

Lucy grumbles this time, not really liking to hear about Ona’s past relationship, which she knows is totally hypocritical of her because Ona sees Keira almost every day. Without another word, she takes Ona against her again with authority.

Ona is still smiling about her girlfriend’s concern but put her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder again. She strokes softy Lucy’s bad knee and think a little before saying something else.

“Everything’s gonna be alright mi Vida. As long as your father don’t say that he supports Real Madrid, it’s going to be ok.”

“He better not” Lucy snorts.

********

Ona was right. Their family get along pretty well, their differences of language being erased by Lucy’s dad’s Portuguese and Ona’s mother’s basic English. She almost learn it only earing Lucy and Ona talking together but it was enough to have a great conversation with the Bronze.

“You are lucky to have two grandchildren already” Ona’s mom says at one time during the diner.

Alfred and Alzira were playing with Narla and Coco in the garden after the dessert. Ona and her brother Joan, sitting next to each other, exchange a glance. Lucy almost chock on her sangria, making Jorge smirks at her sister in front of him. Ona spat her girlfriend on her back. They already talked about having kids together, but that’s true that they never talk about it to their relatives.

“Yes, I am” answers Diane Bronze, smiling when the Batlle’s stay silence. “Maybe I’ll have more one day.”

“Oh, so you want a third?” Joan asks Jorge, ready to push her sister under the bus to save his ass.

“Nah, not at all” he laughs. “I love my children, but two is enough. Now that I can sleep at night again, no one will never take that away from me again.

“Two is good” Lucy mumbles, glancing at Ona from the corner of her eyes.

“Joan is older and with his girlfriend for longer” Ona points, not having missed her brother move. “It would make sense if he has kids first.”

Ona smirks when Joan try to crush her foot under the table and miss because she moves on her chair. The shift makes her closer to Lucy, who kind of mistake her girlfriend’s movement, thinking that Ona is looking for some physical touch. The Catalan woman really doesn’t mind when Lucy puts her hand on her lower back though.

They all are saved from this conversation by Narla barking when Coco tries to steel one of her rocks.

Later that night, when Ona’s family is back to Villassar de Mar and Lucy’s is in their room, Ona can’t stop to think about the conversation they had about children. She wants to have children with Lucy, but they both are professionals women footballers, being pregnant mean to have to stop for like nine months at best. Lucy said she wanted to carry a child first after she stops playing, but she wants to be able to play the next World Cup, in 2027. Won’t it be too far from now?

Lucy, who was checking that the doors were closed, fine her girlfriend standing up in front of the bay windows of their bedroom, lost in her thoughts. So lost that she doesn’t hear her coming. Ona jumps when Lucy takes her against her, her front glued against Ona’s back.

“What’s torturing your mind, Beautiful?” Lucy whispers.

“Nothing” Ona answers before turning in Lucy’s arms to cuddle against her. “Today was great.”

“It was” Lucy smiles softly.

Her concerns were useless and she’s very relieved to see that everyone had a great day. But she feels like her girlfriend is hiding something from her and she doesn’t really like it.

“I can hear your brain, Bonita.”

“Yeah? What are you hearing?” Ona smirks.

“That you are hiding heavy thoughts from me.”

“That’s an easy answer.”

Ona is smiling when she looks up at Lucy, who put a strand of Ona’s hair behind her ear. She doesn’t have to ask Ona to talk to her one more time, the Spaniard opening easily to her.

“I was thinking about the conversation from today, about children.”

“What about it?”

“You said that two children are good, were you saying that to stick with your brother or was it more for us?”

“Oh, for both of it” Lucy shrugs. “I think that two is a perfect number honestly. When you are three, I feel like there is always one who is away from the two others, look at my sister. I’m pretty sure that almost no one know that I have a sister.”

Ona nods, following Lucy in their bed when she takes her by the hand. She only has a brother herself and she’s not sure that she would have get along so well with him if she had another. Or a sister.

“Would you rather have boys or girls?” Ona asks with curiosity.

“I don’t really care. All I want is healthy children with the most beautiful girl in the world.”

“And here was I, thinking that you wanted to have children with me” Ona sighs dramatically.

Lucy pinches her ribs, making her squeak and trying to escape Lucy’s arms. But Lucy doesn’t let her, stopping her tickling only when she scared to wake the children up. When she stops, she was on top of Ona, her faces separated by only several centimeters.

“I love you, even if you are an idiot sometimes” Lucy whispers before kissing her.

“I love you too” Ona smiles softly. “But you can stop your kisses now, because there’s now way we are doing anything with your family around.”

“Oh, come on.”

********

Some days after that, the break is over, and the season is starting again. Lucy’s knee seems to be good enough for her to play without having a care to give for now, or at least more things to think about it. It’s a good news for both of them, Lucy being happy to be able to play like this and Ona seeing her girl being happy. With Mapi back from injury, they are almost always starting in the defense every match, unless some of them is being rested.

Their families went to the first game together, before the Bronze had to go back to England. It was noticed by the fans of course, but none of them is bothered by that by now. Ona and Lucy still chose to stay private but not secret, even if the video of them kissing in the crow of a football stadium went viral.

They are playing against Levante today and they went to Valence to play the game. After the training, when they are sitting on their cubby, Ona comes to Lucy before going in the tunnel.

“How’s your knee mi Vida?” Ona asks softly.

“I’m fine Princesa. Stop worrying, you’ll be older than me soon.”

Ona rolls her eyes but help her getting up anyway. They slowly follow the other in the tunnel, talking with Salma and Jana.

The game went great, Ona knows some of the players from the other team, but like always she putted her relationships on the back of her head for the game. It’s not the same after the game though, and the Catalan woman always enjoy catching up a little bit with her friends like this.

It’s ironically one of them who take Ona down, soon after the beginning of the second part. It was one fair challenge, until her opponent casually shoves her crampons into her ankle while walking on her foot.

Ona’s cry of pain is audible in all the stadium. Alexia is at her level when Ona grabs her foot in pain and the blonde saw Lucy coming straight for them. It was what Alexia thought, until Lucy passes right next to them and go right for the girl who hurt Ona.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” she shouts, pushing her hard.

Ona gets distracted from her bleeding ankle by the scene.

“Stop her, please” Ona whispers to Mariona, crouched beside her.

The Majorcan sights softly before getting up to stop the scene before Lucy get carted with red. It would already be a miracle if she doesn’t have a yellow.

“Lucy come on, breath” Mariona says a little harsher than Aitana who were actually trying to stop Lucy.

The English woman glares at Mariona, but she doesn’t seem impressed by it.

“She could have broken her ankle!”

“I know but she doesn’t. Your girlfriend is currently getting treated, so maybe you want to check on her before the game starts again no?”

Lucy sighs, rolls her eyes to the referee when she shows her a yellow card but jog to find her girlfriend. Ona’s sock is red with blood and Lucy grimaces when she saw that the team needed to cut it with a scissor to take it off.

Alexia sends her a disapproval look when she crouched next to Ona. The Spaniard is laying on her back, one arm on her face while one of them team medic is currently stitching her wounds.

“Hey” Lucy says softy, removing Ona’s arm from her face. “You’re ok?”

“Yeah” Ona answers, without loosening her jaw. “Did you get a yellow or a red?”

“Yellow” Lucy answers absent-mindedly, looking at her girlfriend’s injury. “Will you be able to play after that?”

“She won’t” one nurse answers for her.

Ona pouts and Lucy squeeze her hand. Thanks god, even if she has several stitches, it doesn’t seem to be a bad injury. Lucy looks up when she hears her name being called. The game is about to start again. And, even if she doesn’t want to, Lucy has to be back.

Not being subbed until the end of the game, Lucy had to watch Ona getting out of her view to received other care and maybe painkiller. She doesn’t reappear until the 92nd minute, some seconds before the referee whistles the end of the game.

When Ona came back on the pitch with crutches, Lucy feels her heart tightens a little bit. She made her way to Ona, passing a protective arm around her shoulder.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine. I got six stitches though.”

“If Mariona didn’t stop me, she will have got six stitches too” Lucy grumbles.

“Even if it was hot, I’m glad she stops you. I was the one sending her, to be honest.”

Lucy pouts but doesn’t have time to answer anything, other people coming to check on Ona. Staying next to her like a bodyguard, Lucy glares so hard to the girl who hurts Ona that she didn’t come to excuse herself one more time. At some point, she passes her arm around Ona waist to help her staying up. And when it was time to go to the changing room, Lucy doesn’t hesitate one second to take her girlfriend in her arms to carry her inside, in a bride style.

Ona took good care of her during the summer, it’s her turn now.

#woso imagine #woso fanfics #ona batlle #ona batlle imagine #lucy bronze imagine #lucy bronze #ona batlle x lucy bronze #lucy bronze x ona batlle

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doll-elvis · 1 year ago

Text

PRISCILLA (2023)

~ my thoughts as an elvis fan

(credit to @urpinkstargirl for the photo)

WARNING SPOILERS AHEAD:

so I saw it last night and I’ve been stewing on it ever since as I wanted to be 100% sure in myself before saying this publicly

**brace yourselves**

After just one viewing… I feel confident in saying that I preferred this film over “Elvis” 2022 🤧. It was just so immersive and so deeply intimate that I walked away from the theater feeling like I had just lived a life with Elvis, and experienced all the ugly and wonderful things that came with it

I am seeing it again tonight and possibly tomorrow just to recapture that feeling (which made me cry… three times…)

And although I’m not the biggest fan of Sofia Coppola, there is simply no denying that she has perfected showing “girlhood” in film, and making the most unique experiences, like being Marie Antoinette and being Priscilla Presley, somehow universal to everybody. I haven’t felt being “14” since I was 14, which was a whole 5 years ago, but WHEW… I most definitely felt 14 again when watching Priscilla navigate life in Germany

Also- we all saw how Austin Butler was completely cheated out of an Oscar and so I’m begging that we do not do that again. Give the Oscar to Cailee Spaeny (who played Priscilla) right now 😤 There are no words besides “immaculate” to describe her performance. Her future is so bright as an actress, I just cannot wait to follow her career + she just seems like the sweetest person ever??

And I know it might seem insane to say that I preferred “Priscilla” over “Elvis” and some of y’all might crucify me for that take but my preference solely comes down to the fact that I appreciate Priscilla’s perspective much more so than the Colonel’s, who to me, has always been the least interesting aspect of Elvis’ story

My biggest gripe with having the Colonel narrative/tell Elvis’ life in the 2022 film is the fact that it made the film feel rather impersonal to Elvis as I don’t think the script or the storytelling ever fully allowed for Austin Butler to explore what he was like beyond the stage

And personally speaking, I have a much deeper love for Elvis the person as opposed to Elvis the performer, and I think that “Priscilla” showed the human side of him far more than “Elvis” ever did (like y’all we actually get to hear and see him reading his philosophy books in this!!!)

But before I get into what was actually depicted in film, and all my praises, I thought I would briefly state what I thought could have been done better. Don’t get me wrong, this movie was beyond amazing, however, it was definitely not without its’ faults:

1. If you have seen a lot of reviewers talk negatively about the pacing in this film- just know that they are unfortunately, completely right in that assessment. The whole timeline of Germany felt literally five minutes long, and the 70s also, felt maybe 10 minutes long which just made both the beginning and end feel rather rushed. Also there were at least 5 scenes that just faded to black before going onto the next one, and some very abrupt cuts in scenes which felt a bit awkward

2. Because this is a biopic, and because it’s based on a real life, there is no climax like you would be accustomed to normally in a film and so I think that the average viewer, like someone who may not really care about Priscilla or Elvis, will probably walk away from the film feeling unsatisfied- possibly bored. I saw it with my mom and my sister, and my mom was asleep in like 45 minutes 😭. The movie definitely got repetitive at some points but I acknowledge the fact that life is repetitive, especially for Priscilla in the 60s while Elvis was off making movies

3. While Priscilla (played by Cailee Spaeny) aged realistically and seamlessly, Elvis (played by Jacob Elordi) was essentially the same person (physically) for 95% percent of the film. For some reason, his hair was already dyed black in the Germany scenes, although we know it was brown at that time, and so there was no real transformation for him until Lisa Marie is born. The height of the actor was definitely jarring at first but eventually I got used to it…however…I damn near busted out laughing when they showed him in the Comeback special outfit 💀 His performance was nothing but incredible (ESPECIALLY THE VOICE) and so I learned to get over the physical disparities rather quickly

4. The ending of this film, particularly the song, was overwhelmingly sad and impactful but I was really disappointed that we didn’t get to see Priscilla’s and Elvis’ relationship after the divorce. This film ends with Priscilla leaving Graceland, starting her “new life”, which didn’t make much sense to me considering this movie was adapted from her book, which very much explores that part of her life, especially with Elvis

I would have really love to seen moments like this from Priscilla’s perspective ⬇️

excerpt from “Priscilla, Elvis and me” (avoid this book)

5. NO CIRCLE G RANCH!!! It is borderline criminal to make a film about Priscilla and Elvis and to not include their time spent at Circle G ranch ** which Priscilla has always said were their happiest times together **. I assume that this was likely an issue because of the budget and the fact that they only had 30 days to film but god… I would have really appreciated some of the domestic bliss that Priscilla and Elvis shared while living in the trailer on the ranch. There were many happy moments/sequences (y’all are going to die when you see the rollerblading/go cart scenes) in this movie, but I think their gradual separation/withdrawal from one another (post marriage) would have hit harder if we saw how happy they were together during their ranch phase

6. For those who have read “Elvis and Me”, we all know about the famed LSD scene that takes place and unfortunately, Coppola heavily missed the mark on it. We don’t see Lamar Fike making out with a tree, we don’t see Jerry Schilling in a closet- instead we see Priscilla and Elvis just kind of rolling around, laughing amongst themselves while the room around them turns different colors

There were definitely many key moments/stories like that missing from the film, and I honestly wish that the movie was an hour longer so that we could have seen the book more fully fleshed out

Lastly, here’s just a general synopsis of the scenes in Germany… I was going to do the whole movie but I don’t have the stamina to type it all out 😭. If y’all want to know something specific please feel free to comment below and I will let you know <3!!

After the beginning credits are shown, the film starts with Currie Grant (who was renamed as Terry West) approaching Priscilla in a diner, inviting her to a party at Elvis’ house. After talking with her parents and assuring them that Priscilla will be looked after by him and his wife, it cuts to her in the back of a car, on her way to meet Elvis. The scene is exactly like how it is in the book, Elvis asks her how old she is, he remarks that she is “just a baby” and so on- Elvis then plays “a Whole lotta shakin” at the piano and that is one of three musical performances we see from him

Priscilla is then re-invited by Currie aka Terry via Elvis to comeback to the house again. Elvis invites Priscilla up to his room, she looks around and sees letters from Anita Wood, and a poster of Bridgette Bardot just like in the book. After Elvis talks about Gladys and how he is still reeling over her death, and how lonely he has felt since then, they share their first kiss to the song “Crimson and Clovers”

There are some scenes of Priscilla at school and some scenes of her sort of convincing her parents to let her continue to see Elvis. And they do agree, but just like in the book, they want to meet him first. Elvis is questioned by Priscilla’s father on why he wants to be with her to which Elvis replies that she is very mature for her age and that he likes talking to her since she is from home aka the United States. He then assures Priscilla’s father that she will be taken care of. After that we see them going to the movies where Elvis expresses how much he wants to be a serious actor, and then they share another kiss on the car ride home. It then cuts to Christmas time where we see Elvis giving Priscilla a watch and then BOOM- Elvis and her are on the way to the airport where they say their final goodbyes as he leaves for the United States

The film really does follow closely to the book (at least from 59’ when they meet to 69’- again the 70s were really rushed) and so I really recommended to read that prior to watching the movie

As for the more sensitive scenes-

There is no explicit sex, no graphic nudity, and no scene where Elvis forces himself upon Priscilla. He does say “this is how a real man makes love to his woman” but all he does is kiss her before she pushes him off. There is a rather long “polaroid-taking” sequence where it shows all the outfits that Elvis would Priscilla dress up in but other than that, we only see Elvis and Priscilla make out

And it did show when Elvis accidentally hit Priscilla in the eye during the pillow fight scene in her book, along with the scene of him throwing a chair in her general direction after she expressed she didn’t like a demo of one his songs, and the scene where he grabs all her clothes from the closet and tells her that she should go visit her parents. I don’t think that the scenes made Elvis look abusive: Coppola was surprisingly nuanced in showing that he had reasons for his sometimes bad temperament i.e the pills he took along with the fact that he was frustrated with his film career

It also shows Elvis’ infidelities but really only through movie magazines that Priscilla sees. So it’s never explicitly shown, I would say it’s more hinted at than anything

And there are two scenes of Priscilla with Mike Stone but again, nothing that is explicitly shown, it’s just hinted at

Finally, to finish this up, this is what I wrote on my Instagram account which I very much stand by ⬇️

Just please give this movie a chance y’all, it was so beautiful and so sensitively done… I cannot wait to watch it again <3

#I was not prepared for this movie #cailee and jacob completely floored me #I’m sorry I ever doubted y’all #give everyone an award #wow #priscilla presley #priscilla movie #priscilla 2023 #elvis and priscilla #elvis presley #elvisaaronpresley #elvis #elvis fans #elvis fandom #sofia Coppola #cailee spaeny #jacob elordi #Spotify

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linos-luna · 11 months ago

Text

My Baby (Pt. 10) 🥀🔪

Yandere!Bang Chan x Fem!Reader x Minho

(Pt. 1) (Pt. 2) (Pt. 3) (Pt. 4) (Pt. 5) (Pt. 6) (Pt. 7) (Pt. 8) (Pt. 9) (Pt 10)

Warnings: 18+, Yandere! Crying, some self harm, violence?

—————————— 🎀 ——————————

Minho was a wreck, losing sleep over your kidnapping for a whole week. Frustrated with the police, he hired a private investigator; however, they were only able to find some old friends of the man. So Minho decided to take matters into his own hands, confronting Chan's old friend Felix

“I haven’t seen him in over 3 years!”

“You're lying!” Minho accused, causing a scene.

Jeongyeon tried to calm him down, but Minho pressed Felix for more information.

“Listen. We know you were in communication with him a little over a year ago…” Jeongyeon said with her arms crossed. “Whether you understood the situation or not…”

“I-I can’t just rat out my friend—”

“Your friend has my girlfriend!” Minho interrupted.

“I… I only know of three places he’s lived at…” Felix said while looking down. “One apartment. Two houses…”

“Spit it out!” Minho said while pulling out his phone. He wrote the addresses on his notes app and sighed.

“That’s it?!”

“Yeah. I swear!”

“Thank you.” Jeongyeon said while pulling Minho away.

“I wasn’t done!”

“We got what we needed!” She snapped. “We don’t even know if he’s even at one of those old places.”

“Yeah but it’s a good place to start…”

——— 🎀

It was late into the afternoon. You were taking a nap and for the moment, it was quite peaceful.

You didn’t even realize that Chan was right next to you. He was also napping, on his side facing you.

You didn’t even notice until you started waking up.

He looked more at ease, as if he hadn’t had a good rest in a long time. His curly dark hair was grown out but suited him well. His features, well, you were reminded of one of the many reasons you originally fell in love with him.

His hand rested gently on your waist, showcasing his caring side. With a bit of light shining through the window, he just looked… soft… and well… handsome.

I mean, things weren't all that bad. He changed a little, loving as always but not as scary. At least he’s making an effort to be gentler and control his emotions.

He looked exhausted. You wondered if now was the time to sneak away. However, you couldn’t get yourself to move. He just seemed so much happier and relaxed when you’re here, almost like you give him purpose for his caregiving nature.

Sitting up, you watch as he moves a bit. There was a slight moment of panic when he didn’t feel your body, but you quickly grabbed onto his hand with the both of yours. Insanity.

You say there for a good ten minutes just watching him. And he was happy to see you there when waking up.

He woke up, finding his baby looking at him with concern. "Hi, baby," he smiled. "Didn't expect you up first."

"You looked tired," you said timidly.

"Don't worry about me, y/n," he replied, sitting up and kissing you. Surprisingly, you didn't resist.

"We need to talk."

His tone shifted, and a sense of unease filled the room.

"I just don't get it," he sighed.

"What?"

"Why would gop with another man?" he said, agitated. "Let him corrupt you…"

"Corrupt me?"

"I saw him with you!" he yelled, making you flinch.

"No, I'm sorry!" he softened, grabbing your arms. "Don't be scared!"

"Stop it!" you yelled, pushing him away. "He's my boyfriend! I'm not a baby!"

"My sweet babygirl," he said, unclear if serious or mocking. "You don't know anything. That's why you need daddy here."

"No! No! No!" you cried, shaking your head as tension rose.

“You need me!”

“Stop!”

“You stayed.” Chan continued. “Why would you do that? What would you stay as long as you did if you supposedly hate me?”

"Because I love you!" The words burst out before you could stop them, and you instantly covered your mouth, shaking your head. "N-no, no! Wait!"

"You still love me..." Chan said quietly.

"LOVED! I meant I LOVED you!!" You tried correcting yourself to no avail.

"I knew you still love me."

"No!"

"You missed me…" he continued as he watched you starting to sob.

"No! No, I don't!" You sobbed while smacking yourself on the head. "Stop it! Shut up! Shut up!"

"You just wanna be held… and loved… just need someone to take care of you—"

It's almost as if your mind was starting to slip. All these contradicting thoughts were overwhelming. What do you want? Do you still love him? Do you like him caring for you...??

"— because you're still my baby."

That was it. Almost as if something else had overtaken you. You practically threw yourself at him, clinging onto him and sobbing into his chest. Chan rubbed your back and held you tight while rocking you lightly. Have you finally lost it?

————— 🎀

“The houses. Those are our last options.”

“And what if she’s not in one of them?” Jeongyeon sighed.

“Dont say that!” Minho snapped.

Jeongyeon frowned at his reaction and took a deep breath.

The two of them were at a local restaurant trying to brainstorm. That is, until Minho looked up and recognized a freckled boy not to far away.

Minho realized something. He’s seen this man here before. Here at the same time when you were here.

“You’re right…” Minho muttered. “She’s probably not there…”

The man gets up, making the other man nervous when making eye contact. Before Felix could react, Minho grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him close.

“You lied to us, huh?”

Instead, the man was quiet.

“Say something!!”he yelled, making the patrons of the restaurant turn to watch.

“Minho!”

“No! He knows something!” Minho yelled back.

Surprisingly, the diners went back to eating and going about their business, acting as if this was normal. It was a little unnerving.

Getting frustrated, Minho drags Felix to the men’s bathroom and lets him go, making Felix slip to the floor.

“I’ve had enough.” Minho grunted. “You know where she is. You know where he has her. You’re still in contact with him.”

“Minho!” Jeongyeon was banging on the door, not sure if she should just barge in.

“Listen, I don’t know what kind of sick friendship you have with Chan, but I’m begging you to give me the correct address of where he is.”

————— 🎀

Not too long after, Minho and Jeongyeon found themselves standing outside Chan's house. Jeongyeon was actually surprised that Felix had coughed up the information.

"Shouldn't we get the police? Maybe some professional—?" she suggested

"No!" Minho interrupted. "I'm getting her! She's MY BABY!"

The intensity in his voice took Jeongyeon aback. He hadn't slept for over 24 hours, and it was evident he wasn't in the right headspace.

"You can go now," Minho said solemnly.

"She's my friend... I want to help," Jeongyeon insisted.

Meanwhile, Chan was feeding you. It seemed like you had given up on resisting. He paused when his phone buzzed, revealing a text from his friend.

< Lix >

[ I’m sorry! They made me tell!]

The man sighed and got up, confusing you a bit as he suddenly lifted you up.

“What are you doing?” You asked as he carried you to your basement room.

“Just stay here.” He replied while setting you down on the bed.

“W-what?!”

“It’s okay, baby.” He said while kissing your forehead. “I’ll be back…”

So what happened? It all flashed by so fast. You were in the basement, listening to the commotion upstairs, but you couldn’t make out exactly what was happening.

You were startled as the door burst open, revealing your best friend, Jeongyeon.

"Y/n!"

"Jeongyeon?" Your voice carried a mix of surprise and relief as your friend enveloped you in a tight hug, clearly thrilled to see you.

"Thank god you're okay!"

"Why wouldn't I be?" you replied.

Jeongyeon didn't know how to respond and quickly pulled you toward the stairs. Hoping to guide you towards a window for a possible escape. However, your attempt was short-lived, and you were spotted rather quickly.

"What are you doing??" Chan's voice rang out.

It appeared that the two men were engaged in a heated argument… or more like a fight? Chan looked frustrated but oddly calm, while Minho, on the other hand, seemed disheveled. It was a contrast between a rested man and an unrested one, both brimming with desperation.

Maybe that was the plan. For Minho to distract him while jeongyeon snuck you out. It wasn’t supposed to get violent…

"Y/n!" Minho's expression changed as he was so happy to see you.

You wanted your run to him. To be in his arms again, but someone stood in your path.

"Baby, go back downstairs!" Chan's voice echoed loudly, leaving you frozen in fear as your friend attempted to pull you away.

Minho looked around, coming up with something on the spot. He grabbed a glass cup from the table and smashed it against the wood. The contents spilled everywhere; he disregarded the large shard cutting into his hand as he ran forward, stabbing Chan in the shoulder. Stunned by the pain, Chan tripped over, and Minho loomed over him, ready to make the final blow.

"Don't!" you called out.

"Why shouldn't I?!" Minho demanded.

"Because—because—!"

"—because she still loves me…" Chan finished with a sly look.

Enraged, Minho threw the glass aside, landing a punch that instantly knocked Chan out. He got up, dragging the unconscious man by the leg into the basement. You and Jeongyeon followed.

You quickly went through the nightstand drawer, grabbing the cuffs that he’s put you in before.

As Minho practically threw Chan onto the bed, Jeongyeon cuffed him to the rail. She turned to you. "Is there another one?"

You nodded, finding another pair in the closet. The three of you returned upstairs, and tears streamed down your face.

"Minnie, I... I don't love him..."

Without hesitation, Minho hugged you, holding on tight. He fought back tears, wanting to appear strong for you. “I know…”

"Are we gonna call the—?"

"Let him suffer," Minho said in a low tone, interrupting the woman while holding you tight. "It's what he deserves! It's what he gets for stealing her away! For stealing away MY BABY!"

Both you and Jeongyeon paused. You pulled away briefly to look at Minho, while Jeongyeon eyed him with concern. Was he becoming what he hated? His actions were almost lethal. He could've killed him. The irrational possessiveness scared all three of you.

"Jeongyeon... call them," Minho said, looking down.

—————— 🎀

A moment of calm enveloped you, feeling at peace in his loving embrace that provided a sense of safety and relaxation. Spooning, was that the right word?

"We should finish packing," Minho suggested.

"Mm... 10 more minutes?" you replied with a sigh. "I'm sleepy."

"We've been in bed all day," Minho teased, with a playful smile.

"Oh well," you giggled, turning yourself around to be face to face with him. Minho gently rubbed your cheek, admiring your adorable features.

"Okay, that's fine. But Jeongyeon will be back soon."

"I can't wait until we move to the new home. And I'm so happy that Jeongyeon is coming with us." You giggled.

"We'll be our own little family," Minho said with a smile. "The three of us and maybe a few cats…"

You planted a quick kiss on his lips and cuddled up into his chest, breathing a sigh of relief.

[ALTERNATE ENDING]

——————————————— 🎀

Tags 🏷️

@salfetkablog , @gyuhbfr @jihyun2monster ,@henrietta-whor3 , @stanskzsstuff , @leah-berkley-17

@lixxiebrownies , @minervasystem

@casarse0446-blog , @kuin7s @jlady-016 , @arthistt @iilliess @marrykat @generalbearangel el , @bunnyxoxodarling @hoeforbangchan n @cozyleeknows @lailac13

to those you read and love the series, I hoped to bring a good conclusion 😅

Don’t forget to like and reblog so others can read it too! I really appreciate you all for liking my writing and I hope to bring you more good fics and series!

I have a few in the works:

Pt. 4 of My Queen ❣️🔪 (yandere!Hyunjin x Reader)

Pt. 4 of Eternally ❣️🔪 (Yandere!Vampire!Jin x Reader)

#kpop #kpop x reader #fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop smut #stray kids #skz x reader #stray kids x poc reader #stray kids yandere #kpop yandere #yandere chan #yandere skz #my baby pt 10 #yandere kpop #minho x poc reader #minho x reader

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cuttergauthier · 1 year ago

Text

Summer Time

Rutger Mcgroarty x Female Reader

Warning: against, Toxic ex, Controlling ex, stalker ex, cussing, fluff

word count: 2.4k

This fic is apart of the insta edit The Summer Everything Changed

let me know what you guys think🤍

Molly invited me to spend the summer with her and her family at a lake house that they go to for a few weeks every year, we been best friends since we were kids, her family is like my own so every year they invite me, the only person in her family I don’t get along with is her brother Rutger.

Rutger and I have never been friends, he’s always rude to me when he’s nice to everyone else. Molly warned me that this year Rutger might be even more rude since he’s apparently been in a mood since he broke up with his girlfriend.

I’ve met Sierra before, her and Rutger dated for about 5 years, and just like Rutger she hated me, even when I was always nice to her.

I hope this year will be different since Molly is bringing her boyfriend again, I was supposed to bring mine again this year but we broke up about a month ago, it didn’t exactly end well so now Rutger and I will be the only single ones, at first I almost told Molly I wasn’t going to go since I don’t want to third wheel her and her boyfriend, or be alone with Rutger but she convinced me to say yes.

The lake house is only an hour away from our hometown so I told Molly that this year I would take my car and drive there, if anything happens i can leave whenever I want.

I put my suitcase in my car, and started the drive there. Molly and her family have been there since yesterday. It’s 2:00 p.m. right now so i should be there by 3:00 p.m.

I parked behind Molly’s car in the driveway, I unbuckled my seatbelt and made my way to the trunk to get my suitcase.

I got my stuff and made my way to the door, and walked in.

The door leads to the living room where I saw Rutger. He turned to look at me and rolled his eyes.

“What you can’t knock now?” He asked, annoyed. I rolled my eyes at him.

“When have I ever knocked?” I asked. Her family always told me to make myself at home, and said that I could drop by whenever her mom even gave me a house key at their home because I always came over.

“Well maybe you should start,” he said before getting up and walking away.

I made my way upstairs to my usual room. I ran into MOM.

“Hey sweetheart, I'm so happy you’re here” she said, giving me a hug.

“Thanks for inviting me,” I said smiling.

“You’re like a daughter to me, you will always be invited” she said.

We talked for a few more seconds before I went to my room.

I started unpacking when Molly burst through the door and ran to hug me. I started laughing.

“I missed you” she said

“Molly, we saw each other yesterday before you left,” I said chuckling. She pulled away and smiled

“I know, it’s been 1 day too long” she said.

Molly and I are usually always with each other or at least talk once a day. We both decided to go to University of Michigan, we always stick together.

“I missed you to molly” i said smiling

“Good, now let me help you finish unpacking”

“Thanks”

It only took us about 30 minutes to finish unpacking so Molly sat down on my bed and looked at me smirking. Oh no what did she do?

“What’s that look for?” I asked

“Well you see, I'm sorry” she said nervously.

I looked at her confused.

“Sorry for what? What did you do?” I asked

“Well you see, you were only supposed to be here tomorrow, so my parents and I kinda planned a double date night… so you’re going to be stuck here with Rutger” she said.

I rubbed my eyebrows and sighed.

“It’s fine Molly, I'll just stay in my room if I have to,” I said, smiling softly.

This is not how I expected my first night here to go, but I get it so it’s fine.

“Are you sure it’s okay?”

“Yes, I promise” i said

“Okay good, I feel bad” she said

“Don’t be, it’s my fault I decided to join a day earlier”

“We have a few activities for date night so we’ll be back pretty late, we’re leaving in an hour and maybe this will give you and Rutger time to finally get along” she said and I laughed.

“Molly, Rutger and I have hated each other since we were kids. I don't think a few hours will change that.

“You never know, people change” she said with a wink, what the hell is she planning? I know my best friend, she’s definitely up to something.

She gave me one last hug and we made our way to Molly’s room so I could help her get ready.

“Can you pick out my outfit, please?” She asked while she does her makeup.

I nodded and made my way to her closet.

“What about this?” I asked, showing her a cute white v neck dress with purple flowers.

“Oh I love that, thank you” she said happily. I chuckled

“You’re welcome.”

Once she was done with her hair and makeup she went and got dressed.

When she came out of the bathroom I looked up from my phone and smiled.

“You look beautiful,” I said.

“Thank you, now are you sure you’ll be fine here?” She asked.

“Yes, now it's almost 5:00 p.m.” I said.

We made our way downstairs where Josh, her boyfriend and her parents were waiting.

“Hey Yn” Josh greeted me smiling.

“Hey Josh, have fun you guys” I said before they all left.

I have no idea where Rutger is, so I made my way to the kitchen to get something to eat.

I went to the fridge and took some grapes and put some in a bowl before making my way to the living room.

I put on Outer Banks on Netflix and sat down on the couch.

About 10 minutes later Rutger came in and sat on the other end of the couch. Neither of us said anything.

A while later my phone started ringing. Rutger scoffed and looked at me annoyed.

I checked to see who was calling me, only to see that it was my ex boyfriend, I rolled my eyes and silenced the call. I put my phone next to me and continued to watch the show.

A few seconds later my rang again, I silenced it again, then he called again.

“Oh my god, just answer the damn phone,” Rutger said, annoyed.

“No” I answered and silenced it.

When he called again, it pissed Rutger off, he gave me a look that said you better answer or I’m throwing your phone outside.

I answered and put the phone to my ear.

“What do you want?” I asked, pissed. Why the hell can’t he just leave me alone, I broke up with him a month ago because he was so controlling.

“I’m at the lake house, we have to talk so let me in” he said pissed. My eyes widened. No this can’t be happening, what the hell does he think he’s doing.

“No chance in hell” I said angrily. Rutger raised his eyebrows at me, as to see what the hell are you talking about.

“You either let me in, or i get in on my own, your choice, I know Molly’s on a double date with her parents right now so I know you’re alone since Rutger would never stay alone with you”

“What are you, a fucking stalker?” I said worriedly, I’m not alone, Rutger wouldn’t let anything happen to me right? Even if he doesn’t like me?

I stood up and started walking, pacing back and forth.

“Yn, open the goddamn door,” he said.

My eyes widened and I stood still and looked at Rutger. He could tell something was wrong so he got up and snatched the phone out of my hands.

“What are you doing?” I asked worriedly, I don’t want Rutger to Provoke him and make him worse.

“Shush” he said pointing his finger at me to tell me to shut up. I closed my month and scoffed.

What are you doing Rutger.

“What” he said on the phone before he continued. “No she’s busy right now, and I suggest you don’t call her again and you better fucking leave” he said pissed before he hung up.

“What the hell did he say?” I asked when he gave me my phone.

“Don’t worry about it” he said, making his way to the door and looking outside. I scoffed and locked the front door.

“Is he still out there?” I asked worriedly.

“Yes,” he said before looking at me.

“Go to the kitchen and make sure the patio door is locked.” He told me. I nodded and rushed to the Kitchen.

I looked to see it was already locked. Thank god.

I made my way back to the living room to see Rutger still looking out the window.

“It was already locked,” I told him.

He looked back at me and nodded. I went and sat down on the couch again and paused the show that was still playing on the tv.

Rutger sighed and cane to sit down next to me.

“Was he always like this? Because I don’t remember him being like this last year” Rutger asked me. I shook my head and took a deep breath.

“No, it started a few months before our semester ended. Last month I had enough so I finally broke up with him.” I said looking at him.

I looked at his eyes, you could see sadness and anger in them, is he sad and angry about my ex's acting? or at me for letting this happen?

“I’d tell you to get a restraining order against him, but I don't know how well that will end up if he’s that bad,” rutger said, which made me chuckle.

“Yeah, I don’t know if it’ll work” i replied

“It would still be better than nothing, especially since he also goes to Michigan” Rutger said, i groaned.

“Fuck, I should have said no boyfriend in college” I said and Rutger laughed.

I looked at him and smiled.

“Thanks by the way, for making him leave, i honestly didn’t think you would”

Rutgers' eyes widened.

“Why would you think I wouldn’t help?” He asked, confused.

“Maybe because you don’t like me,” I scoffed.

“I never said I didn’t like you, and even if i didn’t it doesn’t mean I won’t help, I could tell you were scared Yn, i wasn’t going to let that go” he said

“First off you’re always rude to me, you’ve never been nice, it’s pretty clear you don’t like me”

“Well I always liked you and I thought you were pretty even as kids but you’re Molly’s best friend so I thought it would be easier to just be mean” he said, my eyes widened. He liked me?

“What?” I was shocked.

“Why do you think Sierra hated you, it’s because she could tell, I liked you” he said chuckling.

I can’t believe this, first off there’s no way she would have stayed with Rutger for 5 years if she knew he liked me right?

“I’m pretty sure even Molly could tell, I know my parents did, Luca and Adam would tease me about it back at university” He continued.

“Oh my god, was this Molly’s plan all along?”

“What plan?” He asked, confused.

“Did they already have a date night planned? Because when Molly told me about it and said that I would be alone with you, it was suspicious, I could tell she was hiding something, plus she was smirking and she even winked, she never winks” i said. Rutger laughed

“What’s so funny?” I asked confused

“Knowing Molly probably, and i honestly don’t know how long this date night with my parents was planned I only found out about it this morning” he said

“I knew she was up to something, I just didn’t think it would be you confessing that you have a crush on me” I said chuckling.

“I think it’s more than a little crush.” He said

I raise my brows.

“Look, I really, really like you, is there any chance we could start over and I could take you out on a date?” He asked with a smile.

“Only if you promise never to be rude to me ever again” I replied smiling.

Rutgers smile grew.

“I promise”

“Good, then I would love to” I replied

“It’s only 7:15 p.m. right now, any chance I could take you out for ice cream, we could go for a walk on the beach and talk? Could that count as a first date?” He asked and I chuckled.

“I could go for ice cream and for a walk”

“Perfect, let’s go,” he said, smiling. He grabbed his car keys and we made our way to his car.

Rutger drove to a spot close to the beach where they have an ice cream booth. Rutger ordered for the both of us, once he got mine he gave it to me, making me smile.

“You know my favorite ice cream?” I asked

“See I never hated you” he said, making me giggle.

We walked down to the beach, and walked by the water.

We talked about our lives, it was actually really nice getting to know the real Rutger and not the rude one.

I had fun.

When he pulled in the driveway of the lake house. His parents' car was back, which means Molly will have a lot of questions.

“Any chance we can do this again?” He asked.

“I’d like that,” I said, smiling.

“I can’t wait… can I kiss you?”

“Yes” I replied.

Rutger leaned against the consol put his hand on my cheek before our lips met. Our lips moved in sync, before we pulled away breathing heavily.

“Wow” he said smiling, I started giggling.

“We should probably go inside before Molly comes looking for us” I said.

“Good idea”

When we walked in everyone was in the living room. Molly looked at us and smirked before looking at her dad.

“Dad pay up, I told you he’d finally tell her” she said, making everyone laugh.

This summer is finally off to a good start.

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midnightdevotion · 2 years ago

Text

Anyone Else

Requested: Can I get either a Bradshaw!reader or Mitchell!reader x Robert 'Bob' Floyd fic where the reader dated Jake before she ever met Bob, so when she meets the Dagger Squad as Bob's girl, it's the first time she's seen Jake since they broke up? Reader would be engaged or married to Bob and her and Jake would have ended on really bad terms. If this isn't up your alley and/or makes you uncomfortable feel free to ignore this request. Lots of love regardless! 🥰🥰🥰

Pairing: Bob x Bradshaw!Reader, Past jake Seresin x reader

When bob first got called back to top gun you panicked. Not only was your husband called back but so was your brother and the closest thing you ever had to a father. You stressed everyday, hoping they would be safe and sound.

Two and a half weeks later when the mission was successful and bob had thankfully made it home safe and sound, he called you to let you know that the dagger squad was being made permanent and he would be coming home to help you pack up your house and move you both down to San Diego. Nothing sounded better than living near everyone you considered your family. In a whirlwind you two had packed up the house, put it on the market to sell and made an offer on a new house.

It didn't take long to sell your old home thankfully, and you two found a perfect home five minutes from the beach and close to work for bob. It all seemed like everything was falling perfectly into place.

Letting out a dreamy sigh as you look around the open floor plan for the home you just got the keys too, your husband turns to look at you.

"everything okay dear?" you can't help the grin you let shine on your face when you turn to look at your husband's concern.

"Everything is perfect." He gives you a soft smile and kiss on the forehead then continues voicing his thoughts on where you should hang the tv for least amount of glare during the day.

You listen to him rant about where he wants to put the couch and how he wants to hang your wedding photos, giving an occasional hum of agreement.

"oh and also I want you to meet my squad" this causes you to raise an eyebrow. Usually over protective bob keeps you away from the dirtbags in the airforce he's typically assigned to deal with. You didn't question that too much, because you have upfront experience with how most air force men are.

"you do?"

"Yeah- these guys- they're different and I want them to meet the most important person in my life"

"awe, of course I wanna meet them honey and I'm glad you are finally part of a team that aren't just egotistical assholes- though I know how Bradley can be" He laughs at your joke, but he knows how excited you really are at being able to live near everyone. Too often the navy drags people away from the ones they love, so you are both grateful for the chance that it brought you all together.

It's about six days later- after everything is unpacked and settled that you are meeting the rest of the dagger squad. Say what you want but bob is nothing but efficient when unpacking- and bossing maverick and Bradley around for help.

When you arrive at the beach- you are delighted to see Penny and Maverick rekindling their love. However, before you make it over to them Bradley rushes over.

"I have something I need to tell you and I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier but I didn't think you would come and-"

"What is it?" you furrow your brow trying to look over your brothers shoulder. Bob looks just as confused as you do unsure as to what is making rooster so frazzled.

"Jake is here."

This confuses bob even further- because of course Jake is here?

"w-what" It feels like you take a shot of icy hot. both heat and freezing cold rushes through your veins.

"Does someone wanna clue me in?" You swallow and look up at your sweet husband- living proof that the sweet soft genuine love you always wanted does exist and you have it.

"Well- about 5 years ago, Jake and I were engaged..."

---Flashback---

It's late on a Friday night and you and your fiance Jake are laughing at an inside joke you two have. Your heart has never felt so full. You're both ignoring whatever movie you had turned on in the background- enjoying the night together instead.

In fact you remember spending the whole weekend like this- so wrapped up in each other- so in love that nothing else mattered. Laughter echo's the walls in your shared apartment.

That Sunday night- you giggled as he traced each of your features. Adamant that he would be able to memorize every piece of you, mind body and soul.

You just laughed at him and told him you'd be there for him to study every night. You didn't focus on his smile not reaching his eyes, nor the shaky breathe he let out.

You went to bed after a weekend that felt like a dream- a montage in a movie really.

And you woke up to a note on his empty bedside table saying I'm sorry- with his silver ring sitting on top.

-----

Bob knew the story- he knew everything about you and your past. Losing your father, losing your fiance and every other thing your brain would ever think of telling him.

He just didn't know that Jake was the ex fiance.

"I think I need a minute" Is all bob said- rubbing his hands down his face as he turns in the opposite direction for a walk.

"bob wait-" he turns and you can see the worry on his face- all his anxieties displayed right there.

"Honey- It'll be okay I just need a minute to process I promise"

and you understood- of course you did. If roles were reversed you don't know how okay you would be coming face to face with bob having an ex fiance and then it turning out to be someone that you would see everyday.

So you heave a sign and turn back to face rooster. Only he's twenty feet further away then you expected and he's blocking one very frantic Jake Seresin.

"Bradshaw just let me talk to her" You could see Bradley shake his head, but honestly you needed to clear the air. Hell you were married and happy- you've moved on.

"Bradley it's okay" your brother tenses his shoulders. You watch him tell Jake to stay put for one minute and he comes over to you.

"Are you sure? because if you're not sure or not ready to deal with all of this then say the word and we will go home and you can meet everyone another night" You laugh at his over protective big brother tone and shake your head.

"Bradley it was five years ago- I'm happily married I don't need to eat ice cream and cry about the past." you watch his serious face and he nods more than necessary

"Okay okay, but I will be right there and you just holler if you want me to kick his ass, I never got to the first time so" You just shove him away and watch as he does the I'm watching you signal to Jake.

You watch as Jake makes his way over to you, stopping with about three feet between you. The silence stretches for a minute, and he clears his throat.

"I- um Hi"

"hello" and you don't give anything more than that- the way you see it, you were ready to share every part of you for life with him and he threw it away. You don't owe him any more of you. You watch him- seeing the struggle in his green eyes you once knew so well. The ones you had nightmares about after he left. You watch as he heaves a sigh and tugs on his blond strands.

"I- I know words will never explain or show how truly sorry I am for how I treated you back then- for how I.... For how I ended things between us, I just want to say I'm so sorry. Genuinely I am so sorry and everyday I wake up and for a blissful three seconds I forget every stupid mistake I ever made and think I get to roll over and see your face but I never do..." His words shock you a little more than you thought they would. You never expected him to regret when he walked out that night. You figured he was a navy man through and through and navy men alway choose their jets over everything else.

You know that's not fair- that bob would choose you everyday of the week, but you watched it all your life. Jake knew that you watched Maverick choose his jet over ever settling down, you watched Bradley do the same, and then when Jake of all people did it to you- you never thought you would be able to mend that heartbreak.

The Irony of it was not only did you heal, you still chose a navy man who was in jets everyday.

When you first met bob you were smitten- so was he. However when you found out what he did and he watched your face turn sour- he thought he would never have a chance with you. He watched you distance yourself from him and bob was never good with confrontation so when he showed up drunk at your door asking why you suddenly didn't want him after you made him fall in love with you- you spilled everything.

Here the very reason that bob drunkely confessed to being in love with you stands before you and you can't help the heartache that surges through you. Not because your unhappy now- or that you would even change anything.

No the heartache surges through you because Jake looks lost. Like he left himself in your apartment that night and you left him there too when you moved places and moved on.

"Look Jake, did I hate you for a long time for what you did? Yes, but I've moved on, for so long I wanted this day to come- this apology to spill out of your mouth. Thinking someway the words would heal all the hurt you caused, and it doesn't. The hurt still happened, the pain is still a memory for me, but it grows more distant everyday and I'm really grateful. Jake as much as I loved you- I deserve someone that would choose me even when it's hard."

you watch as he swallows hard, nodding his head. You see the exact moment his eyes land on your left hand, the furrow in his brow and he takes in the shining diamond sitting delicately on your left hand. You see the shaky exhale he lets out.

"you found that then?" it's phrased as a question but you know it's more of a statement.

"yes, I found that" he nods and he looks everywhere but you.

"In another life... I would do things differently"

"I know" and you do, you can see his regret all over his face, you can see the heartache in his eyes- the same heartache that stared back at you in the mirror for months on end. You also know he will be okay, that he will heal and move on just like you did. You step closer, and rest your hand on his shoulder.

"things work out Jake, you'll be okay" and with that you step away, and make your way towards the rest of the group.

----

It takes bob a while to join the group again, and it has you worried. You never would've thought bob would be so hurt by this when he knew the story.

So when he joins the group in dog fight football but doesn't greet you know something isn't right. You try and let it going knowing when he is ready you two will talk but as the night progresses and he continues to ignore you, you start to get frustrated.

It's nearing the end of the day- bob just help score the last goal and his team won, the boys lift him up and start chanting his name which makes you grin.

They finally all make their way back over to you and Penny- who has been a great soundboard for how stressful today has been for you.

"That was great honey" you send bob a sweet smile- hoping that playing whatever insane version of football that was helped get his frustrations out.

"thanks." and he turns to talk to Phoenix. Penny shoots you a glance and you just sigh.

When everyone moves inside the bar to keep the party going, you make your rounds in getting to know everyone now that they aren't running around like maniacs.

However, during this bob strategically always seems to be on the opposite end of the bar from you. When it reaches a point that you are socially drained and talked to everyone you move to the bar, and sit by yourself nursing whatever drink penny concocted for you.

You're starting to get tired but whenever you try to get bobs attention he turns his body another direction. It reached a point where you are so frustrated that you call an uber.

"penny I'm gonna head- If bob asks I got an uber home" her eyebrows shoot up in surprise but she agrees to pass on the information, and watches you leave.

---

Now bob might've been mad- not really at you and he knows that. God he knows that, but he's so mad because he didn't realize jake was the Jake and he's mad at himself because he feels so insecure. How could you want someone like bob over someone like Jake.

He's really mad because he's scared. He is so in love with you, but what if you want jake back? What if you want to leave him now because your real love, your first love was never really bob?

What does he do when every time he looks at you, he sees you saying your leaving him, that you're sorry but it was never him and it never will be?

So when he turns around because he has been checking on you every five minutes- he has a timer on his watch so he doesn't do it too often and your gone he panics.

His eyes frantically search the bar- and he hates that when his eyes land on jake standing with coyote he's relieved that you aren't right there.

He searches the bar high and low, and still nothing. He waits, because maybe you just went to the bathroom but when ten minutes have passed and he realizes that is unlikely he anxiously makes his way to penny.

"penny where is she" and penny doesn't even have to look up to know it's bob asking about you.

"she went home"

"home- but- I drove"

"she took and uber" he swallows hard at that. Thinking of every time he saw an article about a woman getting attacked in an uber- You were alone out there with some stranger all because bob couldn't get his shit together.

So he hightails it out of there, and he drives home maybe a little quicker than he should. He gets home and all he sees is the light you left on in the entry way when you left, and he panics even more- where are you?

He rushes to your room, feeling like he is going to vomit up his own heart any second now. He sees the bathroom light on to your shared bathroom and the rush of relief cools his veins like he just got a cold glass of water in the Sahara.

He flings the bathroom door open and sees you jump as you wash your face.

"god bob you scared me" you mutter, trying to rid the soapy bubbles from your face.

"I am so so sorry honey" this causes you to look at him through the mirror.

"for scaring me or ignoring me today." your statement isn't angry, just blunt.

"both... god I'm sorry I was an ass today"

"yeah you were, care to explain?" you watch and he swallows.

"I'm so sorry darling, I was just so gutted with fear when I realized that Jake was your Jake and I realized maybe--- maybe you would want to leave me and take him back and god why wouldn't you he looks way better than me and then i go and treat you like shit on top of it, makes it an easy choice doesn't it and-"

"bob" you cut him off from his rant.

"I do not want to get back with Jake. I married you because I love you, with my whole soul, you make me laugh and you make so so very happy, even my best days with Jake don't compare to how happy I am with you every day." you watch his shoulder sag in relief. You make your way towards him, and pull him in close for a hug.

"I never want to hear you say that you aren't attractive, honey you are the most attractive man I have ever met, physically, emotionally, and in every other way imaginable." you hope he can see all the love you have for him shining in your eyes.

He hugs you back and squeezes like he really thought you might disappear on him and that breaks your heart more than anything else ever could.

"when I said I do honey, it's because I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life, nobody else. I love you more than anything or anyone else in the world and that will never change."

"I love you so much darling, I am so sorry I was stupid.... Please never uber anywhere again though they are so dangerous and I would've given you a ride" and you laugh at his antics because even clouded in his own insecurity and heartache he was worried about your safety.

Maybe that's why it was always meant to be bob, not anyone else. Bob may have bad days just like everyone else but above all else he cares so much it just scares him. You needed someone like bob to care for you after losing so much and he needed someone like you to choose him and soothe his worries away when they get to be too loud.

"it could never be anyone else"

you repeat the words a million times that night, and when you think about it, even the best weekend you ever had with Jake doesn't compare to everyday you have with Bob. It really could never have been anyone else.

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fantomette22 · 3 months ago

Note

What are some Maria headcanons that you have?

( @izunias-meme-hole)

Lady Maria headcanons post (part 1) :

Alright! Well I already share those a while ago : https://www.tumblr.com/fantomette22/743244500505378816/lady-maria-vs-keeper-of-the-old-lords?source=share +couple of other around my blog

So I will try to share other things not just related to « Maria could do pyromancy from her living if she really wanted to but was actually terrified by it! Because she didn’t want to use her own blood to inflict pain and death. » also I won’t explain in detail how I hc she got her Rakuyo : by directly going to the East herself! (Yamamura’s country).

🍂But why did she name it like that? The Rakuyo? Well Rakuyo means « fallen leaves » right? Well, when she finally got her blade she needed to baptise it, to use it properly for the first time. And guess on what she uses it? A fallen leaf! (naturally falling in autumn). Cut it straight in two halves. And that’s how she knew how she was going to name it.

Enjoy the ride t's going to be long ;)

⚔️She got an Evelyn gun during her teenage years and before the Rakuyo she often train & fight with both a chikage and a reiterpallasch (she really like dual wielding 😎 or maybe with another sword like the shadow could have been a thing she fight with 🤔 but yeah I guess she was trained with all type of weapons) I wonder if she could have been a bit ambidextrous too.

⚜️Ok now concerning her family (tree) I have at least 5 different headcanons for it 💀but let’s just go with my main one aka the fic verse one (where she’s just Annalise’s cousin XD). Because if you get me started on the alternatives it’s just never gonna be over XD (those are really in very different timelines. It’s not really the same characters & events are different)

🩸I imagined she had quite a mixed relationship with her family. It’s like when you love them bc it’s your family, you like the good memories and nice moments you have, this little chill & special outings etc but there’s also some stuff you’ll never be able to forget or forgive them. You feel you need distance and be autonomous to not get hurt by them anymore, to not get frustrated and misunderstood. Just have news and share things outside.

She never really fit in with her peers. Kinda an odd one who just masks really well to fit into the mood when asked of her. I prefer to say « a (white) wolf » in a pack of hounds in context but yeah black sheep in a white flock if it’s easier to understand x) She had a lot of pressure on her shoulder as well (being the last pyromancer and not far in the line of succession)

But she really likes her close cousins which she grew up with (Annalise, Vled), a couple of other friends (Charles, Svetta, a couple of future young knights etc) as well as younger relatives and kids (Leo etc)! But she doesn’t get that much along with the others. Like she goes along better with the servants probably.

⚜️She mainly grew up between Cainhurst and where her parents had lands and their manor (in the north, near a coast). Her parents are often not there because they are sent by the crown to places so it's complicated . When her mother is in a good mood that’s mostly fine, her dad is a bit more chill (he taught her how to play a lot of card games and poker too! She probably played 2-3 times with money at stake. She prefers amical things. She will absolutely beat your ass at it too. She’s the definition of having a poker face XD)

👑She was a lil bit raised like a future lady in waiting but more as future knight (page (of the king), squire, knight training etc really rough training too 💀 very dark shit hm like beat the shit out of people while wearing a full weight armor, swim in a ice lake and idk shot hm dead things… I swear there’s more fun things but hm yeah…)

That one really isn’t fun as well but i imagined that during her teenage years she already had to deal with mental health issues (due to well some pb with her family etc). Thankfully, she did get better after spending a summer a bit far away at a friend's home (to simplify). Still she got scared for some years afterwards that some of those dark thoughts would eventually return. Thankfully it didn't for most of her life. She got some happy times…Bad times too but not that bad until well probably more than 15-20y later where you know… she would sadly not make it out this time.

🌌She was accepted as Byrgenwerth and went to mainly study sciences, astronomy, but did learn a bit of theology as well as medicine (basic medicine stuff, nurse & help midwife etc). She did 5y and got a master degree. She also participated in underground expeditions arranged by Byrgenwerth.

⭐️She probably know how to speak way more than 2 languages : whatever they speak in Yharnam, latin/pthumerian language, whatever the equivalent of Japanese is and probably a bit of other European languages too. Oh a north/slavic languages as well, because she had ancestors from there too).

🐴When she was very little they got some borzoi I guess but most of her life at Cainhurst she got 2 siblings crows (I have Phobos & Deimos names in my draft) as well as her own horse, named Filan. (mean little wolf in gaelic/irish apparently? Speaking of which Maria's nickname when she was little was "little wolf" maybe in another language too). She probably had a couple of plants too.

(suppose to be almost a full black horse but i’m not 100% settle because i could go full horsemen of the apocalypse aesthetic with other knights if i change the colors… but in my first draft that’s a black horse yes)

🔥When she was very little they discovered she could eventually have pyromancer blood power.It might have been a huge pride for them and honor for her but… clearly Maria didn’t want to become like the shadows of the antics pthumerian royals. A silent and hidden knight who kills without asking questions… clearly she wasn’t really found of this idea 😅 Thankfully for her she don’t know or to use such power and didn’t put much effort to try to learn it (in life she will probably accidentally use it 2-3 time…)

She highly respects a lot of traditions and culture from Cainhurst but there’s stuff like exposing the remains of animal prey that she found a bit barbaric. She doesn't mind others using blood blades and she will do it alone/ for training or even in choreography but she doesn’t wish to hurt or kill with it.*

💔So she was supposed to become a royal guard but things didn’t go like they should have…the poor young knights got into a fight with something by accident… a mortal trap they couldn’t win… only Maria made it out alive. Very hurt and slightly traumatized… She then had a huge fight with her family & relatives about what happened. She couldn’t even send news to her friends bc they forbid it to calm any rumors about what happened…Hm then Maria’s family decide to send her more north where her parents have lands etc so things calm down and she could ya know do her knight work or smt. Anyway she run away at Byrgenwerth💀

Sorry for the meme jebfekb I am not giving lot of details for now but it's highly link with my Knight & Beast of Cainhurst story.

(Why this meme too? Well due to rumours her friends legit thought she died 💀 she went to Byrgen only 1-2 months later. During the holidays. So she sent to like Ludwig & the other who weren't there letters to tell them she was ok. That's were came this meme XD)

❤️‍🩹Anyway she was partially disowned of some stuff for a bit and didn’t came back at Cainhurst for while. But after some times, her and her family wanted to both apologize and reunite, but without an occasion it would be complicated. Well, until a CERTAIN SOMEONE stole the forbidden blood to Cainhurst and tell them Maria helped 💀 (she had no idea, and he only did that bc he owns her one). So she didn’t approve but she kinda reconciled and they gave her the occasion to do a mission for them later on, in JAPAN (the Eastern land) and well you know the rest.

⚓️She had the occasion to go to « Japan » and have her dream of becoming like half in charge of a ship after getting her master degree! (she just did navigation stuff with the stars but maybe she was captain lol that’s what she wanted to do when she was little actually. But reading Evelyn diaries and not just the novels she realised how hard it was to always have such life h24)

Congratulations Lady Maria!

After really hard years.. and trauma… and a exhausting presentation

You win :

a master degree in astronomy (sciences & other things)

a nice meal with your parents & family that congratulate you

a big part of your inheritance back!

a super wine bottle to share with your friends

a trip to japan

finally your promised personalised double sword

a personalised hunting attire when you came back

to able to work with gehrman’s hunters & the healing church when you came back

So proud of you ❤️👏

✨Other lil hcs :

Laurence made her very interested in religion. I am not joking, I sincerely believe he converted her somehow. / Made her very interest into great one religion etc

Gehrman saved her life more than once, she did the same. They went into lot of hunt training/camping trip as the beggining of being hunters.

She became great friends with Ludwig, Rom, Caryll, friends Damian too etc back at Byrgenwerth. With Micolash it was a bit more nuanced for a while. Before becoming close friends they were roasting each other often XD but respected each other too.

Her brooch either came from her mother or the late queen (aunt) so a family heirloom I guess. Ressemble a lumenflower.

She helped the early healing church with treating people, make food, teach kids etc

She was highly respected by all the old hunters. Even if she had some tensions with dear Izzy at like the beginning they knew each other XD She earn their respect and everyone ended up very liking her being her kindness, abilities etc

When she was sent alone or with a couple of hunters to help in a secluded villages, people were of course really skeptical at first but she quickly proved them her worth.

I think sometimes she wears dresses… but hey she never wears high heels or ballerina shoes (she hates it so hey she still has her special style! aka huge boots XD) It’s often very simple ones as well. Except at Cainhurst, it’s not very extravagant.

She loves to read tons of books (cainhurst library is there for smt XD)

With her cousins they loved to explore and wander the castle! At night too.. got them into trouble more than once.

Sometimes she wears sunglasses when it’s very sunny (poor girl has white eyelashes you see! she have an excuse)

She really loved the lumenflowers too like i explained last time.

She got some scars at the base of her neck. That’s why she almost always wear a jabot with her broach. (maybe on the hands too. that’s why she often has gloves).

She made (with a bit of help) Gherman’s red scarf while in japan.

“Of the Astral Clocktower” because she basically funded its construction with her own money. So like it’s partially hers on papers. (She did mostly astronomical studies & took care of the patients kind of like a nurse during her time at the research hall

She could play a couple of instruments (especially violin and cello).

Of course she know many ballroom & court dance and taught other to others when they were invited to some places.

She actually can “sing” very well (but more music without real lyrics like the dream ost for exemple) ! She would probably almost never do that in public too.

Some books at the workshop are hers

Oh, did I already told she was very scared of pthumerian pyromancers before she fought the keeper of the old lords?

Ok now because I didn't know what to add to the post I asked some of my friends to help me with questions they wanted to know about! Thanks @heraldofcrow & @fareehaandspaniards there you go:

Was she comfortable with life at Cainhurst? (Before the Vileblood)

I think I answered that above ^ it’s very complex and complicated. Sometimes it goes well (especially in childhood) but sometimes it’s very complicated and not so good… (especially during teenage years and during some events where she got a lot of pressure and all. It got better after all this mess and Vilebloods mess of course (even if some distance was left compared to before).

🩸🐦‍⬛Bloody Crow’s relation to Maria?

In my main hc he’s the son of Maria’s cousin (Vled, the knight). So her little cousin basically. But to simplify I often say he’s like a nephew to her. I named him Voron! (I know very imaginative it means raven XD) Still unsure if he’s born before or after the hamlet (probably after too) but in all cases Maria was around to help with the birth and to help take care of him for the first couple of days. She loved him very much. Also In the case something were to happen to his parents, well the king & queen would take care of him but if somehow they can’t/something were to happen to them too, Maria promised she would be the one to take care of him.

Still, she died when he was very young. Probably like 3-6 years old. So he does remember a bit. But just a little and he has very good memories of her. But he also saw his family hurting from her disappearance and all and so he grew more mixed feeling but mostly it stays positive. He really looks like her in a lot of ways.

🕷️Rom and Maria friendship 🥺?

I see you want to know more about their friendship! I think They had a wholesome friendship overall! But it didn't begins great. I am trying to write it in my fic since a few months but it's all hard and idk how to do that exactly XD

Like they were doing a group exercise and Rom was pretty bad and it (supposed to be quite easy) and Maria who got frustrated to explain it so much lash out a bit and tell her like “are you dumb or something?”

Everyone in the class isn't very nice to Rom (and Maria) and said worst things behind her back so she thought that was, you know OK somehow and not that mean. But she quickly realized afterwards her mistake, that Rom was the Provost daughter and that she had some disability. But despite that, she was still trying hard and she must be very strong to have the lvl to be here you know!

Maria feels very bad about it (Micolash had dark looks to give her too lmao) but after a while (talking with other people cough cough) she decided to come to her and apologize sincerely and even try to help her on a few things.

Rom was quite surprised at first because nobody, you know approaches her like this to apologize and that's a huge thing considering Maria is from Cainhurst and a noble.

I mean she didn't even have hard feelings against Maria because everyone else is way meaner and she kinda forgot about it. She was quite surprised but also very thankful and they began to talk more. Micolash was the most surprised and he told Rom to be careful to not get walk over, to not believe lies and stuff but he quickly realized that it was genuine. And Rom had to reminded him (with Damian) that well, when he first meet Rom he was kinda of a bully at first! Before becoming a mother hen with Damian.

So yes the two girls began to talk about a lot of things! She even got invited to Rom’s room. There’s tons of insects and underglass and stuff but generally people don't like that but Maria found it cool! She got some back home too and found it very interesting actually! So they quickly became friends with all the little gang. And also they are basically the two girls of the squad! I mean Caryll is in the girls squad too but they can also be in the boys squad so yeah anyway you know how girl besties can be x) you don’t share the same things exactly. Plus Caryll & Rom are really in the must protected squad.

Maria even defends Rom from her family when she came back for the holiday and they asked her if she made some friends and who they were and stuff. And you know uh Mara had to told them in a very exaggerated manners that « oh I'm friend with the Provost daughter you know! » (You know because that's what they want to know, if she made strong connections with interesting people before anything else…)

But of course, you're going to have very rude comments from some relatives or something who’s going to say “oh the retarded one?” 💀 And everyone's looking at him like “can you please not say it like this?” Poor Maria just standing there and dunno what to say because she really cares about her as a friend. She doesn't just want to have friends to show off she has important contacts. She genuinely values those friendships. Sadly, she can’t just tell her family that her friends are mostly “the weird introvert group kids! just like me!”(so she talk about Ludwig too! but don't put too much details on others…)

So yeah they stayed great friends for years. Sadly, in tough moments they didn’t really share what hurt them to the other… (after kos etc maybe a bit but not too much)

🗡️🛡️What or who inspired Maria's path of knighthood in her youth?

History books & knight novels! Her grand uncle, the other knights, king etc, Her family push her/ “let her choose” that way as well.

Lady Evelyn stories (she was like Maria grand aunt/ cousin of her grandparents, mostly an adventurer).

The bodyguard of Annalise’s mother who was at first a mercenary sent to Loran before becoming a royal knight.

🍜What were Maria's food preferences?

Hm i think if it looks/smells average and edible she’s actually not that complicated XD She made a lot of effort through the years to get used to more common and simple food.

My poor girl couldn’t really cooked anything when she arrived at Byrgenwerth besides cutting basic things, make tea, made ramen and skins animal meat (like rabbit) before Gehrman thought her other recipes 😭 (she made great soups afterwards! hunters like it, she cuts aliments well XD but yeah my boy cooks well for everyone he made her liked many simple things that if not done well many don’t like. But bro is the only one who probably likes some chard gratin or something out of everyone…)

Like most of her family, i supposed she would very much enjoy some rare/medium rare meat XD but when it’s EVERYDAY she got very tired 💀 I mean she tried to tell her family it was too much so they respected her wishes and gave her only vegetables for a couple of days… but not like normal meals no! like a whole ass not decorticate salad or full ass carrots with skins and all! 💀 She rapidly apologized like you can guess. (still she can’t stand those damn carpaccio when there’s too much!)

Besides that yeah only non meat dishes don’t bother her at all, she would even prefer most of the time. She likes both sophisticated but also very simple dishes she discovered. Exotic food from the east. Of course my girl liked sushis, fish, sea fruit etc. I mean she used to like it way more before… you know… afterwards many hunters couldn’t just smell white fish for a few days without feeling nauseous…. for Maria she just couldn’t bring herself to eat like 95% of white sea fish anymore… (I guess salmon and thon and lobster were still ok but that’s it really).

And well of course deserts are always so nice so whatever 🤤

🌻Her relationship with Adeline? /Who is Adeline to her in your interpretation?

(Yeah both of you asked me this one! x) )

Well depending on the interpretations I have two main interpretations for her! (in the AU/very different timeline where Gehrman is like Maria's dad, that's her girlfriend lol) but in my main interpretation that’s not really the case. I prefer to see them as friends and very close friends I think? during her early time at the research hall. Another close friend she made who’s mainly outside of her main group. But both have quite an evolution through the years they knew each other.

If i remember the draft in my head correctly it goes like this :

After Maria graduated (and came back from her mission trip) she went to help the early healing church develop itself and its activities between hunts and going in the pthumerians labyrinth and that’s where she met Adeline.

I supposed Adeline is a Yharnamite? but she lost everything (her family. not sure what happened) and basically didn’t have a home anymore and clearly saw herself as worthless (poor girl had terrible self esteem issues all her life afterwards…) So the early healing church took in some people in need, gave them a place to sleep, eat and heal them if they were sick. Maria took care and helped Adeline during that time (after it was Laurence too).

And so the 2 became friends! In the end Adeline (who had nothing left) decided to dedicate her life to the healing church and helped others as well, so they saw each other with Maria afterwards! They advised each other and could have been a bit confident of each other as well. Of course Maria wasn’t very hyped when Adeline became a blood saint fully (seeing the bad things it could do to people) but she respected her choices.

During the research hall, before Adeline took part in the experiments, she helped Maria, Rom, Caryll etc around with the patients & other things. I suppose because of some dreams/ exposure to something, the decline of everyone's mental health, and maybe other people asking her... she decided to give herself fully to those experiments as well in the end… Her death was one of the last straws for Maria...

----

I know I have more questions left but I am reaching Tumblr word limit soon so I will reblog/make a 2nd post (or even a 3rd)💀 with the rest of the most interesting (and huge) questions! It's not quite written yet but for now this should be a nice distraction and a good reading I hope!

#my asks #bloodborne #bloodborne headcanons #lady maria of the astral clocktower #bloodborne fanfiction #lady maria #my art #fantomette22art

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