#even though it mightve been obvious

[c9kefestation]

the reason as to why ive colored the names of the clubp mascots in my hc posts is to make it easier for ppl reading them to find their blorbos/faves.

+ i separated them all w/ bullet points so they're easier to scroll through and read. think of it as like the trivia section in a character's wiki page

[twipsai]

ive been wanting to do something like this for a while, so here we go

Silver's straightforward attitude and anxieties: a poorly formatted analysis

Silver's anxiety is something i havent seen talked about a lot, and im really just barely going beneath the surface here -- i hope i did it justice in anyway sfdkSKHJFDSKFH i think about his obvious anxiety disorder a lot

transcript of all the text i added under the cut incase its hard to read for some ppl ^_^

image 1 (source: IDW #8): "isnt really used to banter, got worried he actually offended Sonic"

"he worries a lot about not being useful, because thats pretty much his entire purpose in life. if hes not doing something, he will find something to do (badly) or panic. he gets nervous at the slightest insinuation that he mightve messed up because the last thing he ever wants to do is get in anyones way."

"for how powerful he is and how much shit he talks, Silver doesnt really think very good about himself or his own worth."

image 2 (source: Sonic Universe #82): "its hard to say anything here that i havent already said, its just another example os Silver having issues with his self wroth, and also a lot of his motivation coming from protecting the people he loves (and, more generally, protecting the world), considering a page after this he gets up and completely wrecks the Second Devourer"

image 3 (source: IDW #8): "Silver will take pretty much anything literally. he lacks the social skills to identify when someones being serious bc he grew up completely alone"

image 4 (source: IDW #14): "he cant lie (is both bad at it, and it really just doesnt cross his mind to do so), but he can change the subject"

"he also really doesnt like it when people are worried about him -- almost every time people show concern for him, he tries (and fails) to lie or change the subject"

image 5 (source: IDW #14): "he didnt see anything suspicious about [Starline giving the "vault code"] because he doesnt usually assume people lie directly to him, its just not something that usually crosses his mind"

image 6 (source: IDW #60, TSR interview): "Silver's rudeness, his naivete, misunderstanding of jokes/quips/banter, inability to lie, it all stems from his straightforwardness. its simple, but but oftentimes effective (yes i chose a bad page to showcase when it works, ignore that)"

"Silver doesnt like to beat around the bush or show off too often. go in, defeat the bad guys, get out. it ties in with his anxiety of the future -- time is always of the essence"

"Q: What are some of your favorite items to use during the race?

Silver: [...]but the Jade Wisps' "Ghost" is the only one I like. I can disappear and focus on the race."

"it does make him forget to stratagize and cooperate with his friends sometimes, though, when his first instinct is "hit it until it stops moving""

image 7 (source: Sonic Rivals 2): "im not really going over his bluntness in this, but literally the entirety of Rivals 2 covers that. he doesnt think to hide what hes doing because he knows hes in the right, so he just expects everyone else to know that. he expects people to believe him just because hes telling the truth. he doesnt see why he would have a reason to lie, so he never thinks to justify his actions."

"a lot of this bluntness is also shown in IDW #64 -- Silver cant be stealthy and observe someone from afar to save his life when he knows hes right about them. he really takes no time to explain that Duo is Mimic before Whisper steps in and attacks Mimic, even though if he took the time to talk through what happened, he probably couldve convinced Lanolin of Duo's true nature"

image 8 (source: IDW annual 2022): "Silver has pretty much zero idea how to navigate the world outside of helping other people and saving the world. he is almost constantly in "survival mode" and doesnt know how to handle low-stakes"

"(he sometimes takes casual conversation too seriously because of this)"

"he is constantly worried about the future. to an almost unhealthy degree sometimes, its often all he thinks about. when he knows exactly what to do, he comes off as confident and powerful, but when he doesnt know what to do..."

"...he completely spirals. to him, an uncertain future is worse than a doomed one. not knowing how to fix things is one of the most terrifying thoughts to him."

"if Espio hadn't been here to calm him down, i think its super likely he'd have had an anxiety attack."

image 9 (source: Sonic Generations, IDW #64, Team Sonic Racing, Sonic Universe #79): "like, i truly cannot emphasize enough how he cannot relax. anything can be a threat, and if he doesnt see an immediate one, he will find something that is one. "

"he can rarely calm down, because every second hes in the past is another second he should be saving the future"

"i cant properly showcase it here, but if you run past him in Gens, he'll immediately be on-guard."

"he has to always be looking for the next world-destroying foe, it's pretty much his default setting."

"there are tons more examples of his overt anxiety, but these are some of the more prominant examples."

image 9 (source: Archie Sonic #235): "we even see in the traitor arc in archie how Silver is constantly paranoid. the idea never crosses his mind that there is no traitor, because something is always wrong. hes like a machine built to find a problem with no off switch"

"almost anything can set him off and make him untrusting of anyone, because thats the only way he knows how to live. anything can be a threat in his eyes, and when there is no threat, he will either find one or panic that he cant find one."

"because when you spend your entire life fighting,"

"how else are you supposed to live?"

[icumpinkglitterxo]

I'll take care of you

a/n: mightve projected a little in this one 🦈enjoy ★

warnings: i think this counts as fluff?depression, mentions of scars, showering together (no smut)

You and Slash had been dating a while. It wasn't really casual, but it definitely wasn't serious either. Or at least you were both too afraid to admit you wanted a serious relationship. You both knew a lot about each other, but you found it far more meaningful that he knew so much about you than he did.

You had suffered with depression for a while, even before meeting Slash, and it was starting to get worse, and Slash noticed.

He noticed the more obvious things, like the scars on your body, and he noticed the less obvious things, like your growing lack of sleep. It had been a while since you had seen each other, and Slash noticed the change immediately. At first, he thought you just needed time alone, but the more time passed, the more worried he got.

It was 11PM and you weren't even sure what day it was. You had only checked the time because someone was banging on your front door. You got up after a while of hoping they would give up and go away.

You opened the door, and Slash's voice rang through your ears, "where the hell have you -" he cut himself off mid sentence when he saw just how awful you looked. "Baby..?"

You don't bother to look at him. You can't even bring yourself to be nice, "what do you want?" He looks hurt, but he reminds himself that you're sick and need help. He lets himself inside your apartment and closes the door behind him, "I've been so worried about you..."

You shrug. He sighs, "I haven't seen you in at least a month..." You stay quiet and he sighs again.

"When was the last time you ate?" You stay quiet. "Alright...when was the last time you got proper sleep?" You stay quiet still. He takes a step closer to you, "Baby, I'm really worried about you." You look down.

He wraps his arms around you and pulls you into a tight hug. For some reason, this makes you break down crying. He holds you tighter, "shhh...It's okay...I'm here," he says softly. He picks you up and carries you into your bathroom. "You think you can take a shower for me?" You sniffle and nod, even though in your head you were repeatedly saying no. He turns the shower on and starts taking off your clothes, making sure to be gentle.

When you're completely naked, he starts taking his own clothes off, knowing you might need some help. He walks you into the shower and lets your hair get wet.

He grabs the shampoo and starts scrubbing your hair with it, rinsing it, then repeating. "Close your eyes, okay? I don't want to get soap in your eyes," he says. You tilt your head back and close your eyes. Even though you had been putting off showering, it was nice having him do this for you. It made you realise just how much he cared about you.

Once he finishes rinsing the soap from your body, he grabs a big towel and wraps it around you, a smaller towel for himself and an even smaller towel for your hair. "Do you feel any better?" You nod, "a little," you mumble. He smiles and walks you into your bedroom. He sits you down on the bed and goes over to your dresser, grabbing clean underwear and a t-shirt (which happened to be one of his).

He helps you dry off and get dressed, then he grabs a brush and starts brushing your wet hair out. "Do you want me to dry it?" You shake your head. "Do you want to dry it?" You shake your hear again. He rests his chin on your shoulder, "are you sure? You could get sick..." You lean into him, "I do it all the time. I'll be fine," he kisses your cheek and looks at the clock. 12AM. "You need to get some sleep," he says softly.

You want to protest. You hadn't been able to sleep in so long. But you knew he wouldn't take no for an answer, and you also knew it would be easier with him there.

He helps you into bed and pulls the blanket up around you. He cleans up your room a little, then drys himself off and pulls on some clean sweatpants he found in your drawer. They were his. He chuckles softly and crawls into bed beside you.

He could tell you were starting to overthink, and he also knew that you were still struggling. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you close, "don't worry about anything right now, sweetheart," he whispers in your ear. You were slowly starting to fall asleep. You were right. It was easier in his arms. He made you feel loved, and he made you feel safe.

"Just get some rest, I'll take care of you."

[oh-allie]

my official post to put an end to teruhashi hate

(note: im aroace, so of course i love the headcannon that saiki is too, BUT i also like saiteru a lot ☺️ to me its not a big deal if hes shipped with anyone because he is just a character and its not canon that hes aroace {even though i'd be happy if he was!!})

just admit you just hate confident women (because its CANON that to everyone but saiki, she IS the perfect pretty girl.)

her crush on saiki is incredibly reasonable. it started as her seeking validation, because her entire self worth since birth has been male validation, but over the series its shown how she really comes to care about him.

if you say something like "oh but he obviously doesnt like her back" ?? to US it's obvious that he doesnt outwardly reciprocate her feelings, but to her whenever saiki ignores her, thats just how he is to everyone.

to her, theyve gone on multiple dates, and theyre in the same friend group, so its totally reasonable for her to have some hope still.

refer back to my post about the years of harassment and trauma teruhashi has faced 🙏 i could talk about her and how she deserves better forever 🙏🙏

saiki doesnt even hate her either 😒😒 you are fighting a battle that nobody else cares about 😒 saiki n teruhashi r besties and you guys mightve watched a bootleg version if you think saiki still hates teruhashi at the end of the show or even at the beginning?? he just didnt like how she attracted attention, he acknowledges that everything she thinks about herself is true

and anyway the WHOLE show is about how saiki is growing and accepting the people in his life, and accept the fact that he cares about them. TERUHASHI IS ONE OF HIS FRIENDS TOO 😒😒

[nerdsinc]

after 30 hours of work, i finally drew every single version of matoro, redesigned in my style! he's my favourite character of all time so i decided to put a ton of love into this drawing. theres lots of little cool details which ill go into more depth on under the cut!

(as always, PLEASE reblog so my art gets circulated!! it would be very, VERY appreciated! thank you, ily!!)

every version of him has a sad expression, though i tried to make it the most prominent in the last three. i think hes just tend to have a sad look in his eyes even when hes not actually that sad.

his 2nd matoran form has the gear part stylized to look like a tail, and i added a shorter version to the 1st matoran form to imply that it just 'grew' over time

his toa inika design has the same tail as the first two matoran forms, but its been broken, the gear no longer on it. it shares the same transparency as the other parts of his design, and is shaped like a lightning strike to call back to how he became a toa in the first place

the toa mahri design doesnt quite have a tail, instead having the tube broken, having the silhouette of a tail without actually being one.

the 2nd matoran design has a scarf, i like to imagine that he wore it almost constantly, but it was taken when he went to karzahni, and he never recovered it. kopaka later did, and ended up wearing it in memory of matoro

every design has the same hair-like mask (originally how i stylize the akaku), and has a asymetric design where one side is a bit longer. the mahri mask looks more like the akaku, however the iden looks less like it, with the ""hair"" being much longer and pulled back. this was to try and show how he didnt really feel like himself as a toa inika, and how that mask was very much so not him (as it was its own separate entity after all) but once he became a toa mahri he felt a bit more like himself again.

i tried to make it look like he was wearing winter gloves in most of the designs, though its most obvious in the 2nd matoran and mahri designs

i stylized the iden a bit so that it looked like he had horns, my thought process there was just kinda "karzahni = hell so i guess it makes sense"

each one has lines under their eyes, with the 2 matorans having ones similar to the markings on the akaku, toa inika having ones similar to the iden that also are meant to subtly look like tear streaks, and the mahri having ones that very subtly are meant to look like the lines on the ignika mask

more red accents on the mahri design, to call back to the red flag, and also to teridax/maxilos

while i didnt draw in most of their weapons, mahri kept the twin cutter and i just made it an attachment to his hand

the red axle piece in the mahri foot piece is actually a piece i thought was included in the set itself. i bought my mahri matoro second hand, and apparently along with him being in bad shape he also just had those parts added there for some reason? so i drew it in thinking that it was correct. just learnt today that that was false. but i like it so im keeping it

there mightve been more details i added, but thats all i remember right now!

[aihoshiino]

do you think b komachi (specifically the 4 founding members) were ever friends at one point? i think 45510 implied it with how ai refers to them being friends before and nino saying that ai didn’t ‘cling to her friends’

personally, ive assumed that they were never close due to that rift between her and the rest of them therefore leading ai to want to make friends with them but knowing that they mightve been close in the past (even if it was brief) before distancing themselves away and growing to resent and envy her is just

Idk it hurts

I THINK ABOUT THIS SO MUCH AUUUUUU...

The Spica novel implies they never really connected at all and that there was some pretty nasty bullying of Ai basically immediately but uh, the Spica novel also has a lot of weird contradictions with the main series so I kind of just have been taking everything from it with a grain of salt... it'd be one thing if it was actually written by Akasaka and he was retconning but I genuinely think this Tanaka guy just did not know anything about oshi no ko when he wrote it lMDKMSLSKS

SO COMPLETELY IGNORING SPICA IN THAT REGARD...!

It's hard to pin things down exactly because we've never gotten a proper snapshot of that part of Ai's life. The closest we come to having anyone from that time period talk about it is in 45510 and Nino is sooooo biased that it's hard to know how seriously we can take her words.

I tend to believe that Nino is mostly telling the truth about how things went there from a purely narratively utilitarian standpoint of "this is our only source for this particular information so she cannot be a wholly unreliable narrator", even if her obvious emotional bias means you can't just uncritically accept what she says. Kyun kind of accidentally corroborates this in Viewpoint B where she describes Ai as being a little distant and seeming to have her walls up, which matches Nino describing her as 'aloof'.

I don't think this was something Ai was doing intentionally, though! This isn't something anyone in B-Komachi would've had context for but immediately worth noting is that, given that we know Ai can't be any older than 11 or 12 when she debuts in B-Komachi, this is two years at the very most out from her being separated from her mother. As Ayumi herself admits, her abuse of Ai escalated and peaked when Ai was eight or nine years old and Ai was put into the children's home and abandoned by her not long after. Given how fresh the wounds of abuse and abandonment would've been, it's really not a shock to me that Ai might have been kind of wary and defensive in a way that would've read as aloofness to kids who don't know what's up with her.

And also, like... Ai is autistic lol! She literally has a type of neurodivergence that affects her ability to socialize on top of her being implied to have been pretty poorly socialized up to that point as well. Chances are good that during this important period of making first impressions in B-Komachi that she probably wasn't great at masking, so that combined with her already having her guard up a bit likely would have made her seem really standoffish.

With all that laid out, I think my read of what initially happened with the founding members and Ai is that they were all reaching out to each other but ended up missing the final step they would've needed to really connect. The other founding members eventually gave up but Ai never stopped trying to reach them even long past the point where even she admits that they probably hate her. She never gave up on the idea that they could be friends.

It's definitely sad! I think the way the founding members fell apart is a really good depiction of like... an emotionally messy situation where it's hard for me to really blame anyone. In the aftermath of ch132, I've seen a lot of people really ragging on Nino and blaming her entirely for Ai's isolation within B-Komachi but like... isn't Ichigo also to blame for letting things get that bad? Isn't it the manager's job to make sure toxicity like that doesn't fester? Hell, a big part of why the girls in B-Komachi resented Ai is BECAUSE of Ichigo - because the group's management spotlighted and promoted her to the extent that all the other girls felt like they were just there to be Ai's backup dancers.

Thank God that could never happen with the present day generation of B-Komachi, right? Ha... hahahahhaa...............

[epic-dragon-hell-99]

going to start posting again maybe i just feel like ass. like why tf am i alive that shits not fair to other people bro. i heard mom complain abt gas prices spiking and if the us still gets most of its petroleum from where i think it does i have some ideas why and i kind of hope it gets worse. cant say that irl though cause it would suck for us but i think things should suck a bit more for us really. my dad makes good money but hes resigned to never retiring so im going to need to get a job after i finish college and that shit probably wont even be relevant to fuck all if i can get one to begin with and im probably not even gonna get beyond a bachelors degree ever and thats more than most people but it mightve been the worlds most expensive waste. i wish i didnt choose a college that sucks ass cause i was ill-informed and classist abt it at like 19. convenience is nice but im not sure it was worth it. although i think why i have fuckall irls is i just have a problem trusting people in general maybe. and idfk how to make the first move or have regular small talk or benefit people other than shoving money at em cause i never know what to say and i don't wanna make ppl drive me places. i can't drive fuuuuuuck. back to gas prices! none of that shit is important to anyone but my dumb ass but i hope the usa explodes forever or something goddamn I hate this shitass country in this hellhole society for real every day people are dying and for what. fuck. if they ever reinstate the draft you guys are welcome to come to my house so we can all break each others legs n shit. also i wish we didn't have to use gas in general but electric vehicles are like what. a tesla??? ew. and there's still a bunch of shitass minerals that kill people to get and that goes for like everything i wish we knew how to at least recycle this stuff. better. also me personally my parents live ~30min out from the major cities in either direction idfk why they did this gotta deal with a hoa and shit despite being damn near in the middle of fuckall. the Scary Woods is fun to dick around in i guess but i think if i described the size of my house + yard it would be obvious why i could probably use having a shittier life like goddamn i feel like it cause i get so scared of everything and hate myself abt it. cant even attempt to be a better person right cause everything feels like a chore and i already do bare minimum or less of those. so basically things could theoretically get a little better for me but i would really prioritize people who are getting killed and dying and shit. what if someone got the president and all members of congress in a hammer car explosion would that be scary or what [lying]

[the-kr8tor]

I love matpat so much guys <3

But a lot of things has my curiousity peaked.

Because certain things definitely wouldnt be on a pirate ship

So that has my curiosity for maybe next chapters or for something major

Then it has a lot of stuff that involves sinking or being in the sea and not above it. LOREEEE MAYBE? Maybe MJ lore or maybe reader drowns or almost drowns like how they did whej they first met hobie.

Then these

Ballroom dancing? Hmm, i got a couple of theories or ideas. I see you (i love the pinterest boards though and i could call out more about it but thats like the main things i wanted to call out)

But thats just a theory<3 (not really nothing in here is theories its just me pointing out the obvious or making observations)

But maybe who kmows we will get to see mjs past or what happened to mh, i mean Hobie definitely doesnt trust reader. What if its because of something MJ had done, because hobie immediately thinks reader had brought or had the navy following them, what if MJ actually did something like that. Or maybe she drowned. Or maybe both because hobie had to force her to walk the plank even no matter how much it mightve hurt him or the crew but who can say since MJ couldve been a traitor, a backstabber. So thats a theory, maybe or it could go other routes. (Is it easy to tell how invested in all your stories and previous stories youve wrote? I love them. Also when your done with the pirate hobie series you should make a cowboy hobie series/j)

I do love your stories though and your writing and im utterly excited for pirate hobies next update, whenever i see you post i get happy and immediately read it if i can, drop everything for your stories to stay updated fr fr (im sorry for going on a mini rant and with the photos it makes it longer)

Me when someone finally looks into the whole pirate hobie board 🤭🤭🤭

A GAME THEORY AND CUT!!

I seriously love seeing your thoughts! It literally invigorates me to keep on writing so thank you so much, angel!!! 🫶 (All I can say is there will be lore in the next chapters and some burning questions answered)

Don't tempt me with a cowboy Hobie series bc that one has actually been plaguing my mind since I've first talked about it. I gotta at least finish bdas first lmaooo but yes I'll definitely make it someday! (And I'll make it the coziest series ever!!! No sad, maybe, just a lil bit perhaps 🤣)

[hawktims]

3, 6, 10, 15 for the FT asks game? :D (also, I love your url!)

Thank you!! I was so glad the url wasn't taken. After the way the show has ruined me, I gotta keep hawk and tim with me at all times for my wellbeing </3

3. What is you favourite episode and why?

Oohhh this is so hard for me to answer because after every rewatch I keep finding new things to like about a certain episode... right now I'm torn between ep 3 and ep 6. Ep 3 because I liked seeing Tim and Hawk leave town and go on a "getaway" even though it wasn't all that smooth sailing. Also the "men do eat in restaurants!" scene is one of my faves. I'm very smitten with dramatic 1950s Tim but also the way Hawk was looking at him during his outburst is just so... like you can tell he finds Tim amusing and endearing, and instead of a dick about it he doesn't even deny it when Tim calls them a couple !! And ep 6 because it gave us ~father~ Skippy and showed us Hawk's softer side as a dad for the first time. And ofc Tim and Jackson !!

6. What is your favourite parallel/reference in the show?

Aside from the obvious answer of their "promise you won't write" scenes... I liked the parallel of 1950s Tim begging Hawk to take him upstairs (I don't remember what ep it was?? I think it mightve been 4) vs. 1970s Hawk pleading for Tim to not leave Fire Island in ep 7.

10. If the show had one more episode, what would it be about?

This is again hard but maybe something filled no pain and no angst would be nice... more of Tim and Hawk being cute (my ideal fantasy is them going to see The Rockettes in NYC 😞). Maybe more of Tim's life in SF with Frankie and Marcus.

15. What is your favourite relationship from the show (could be romantic or platonic)?

Other than (the obvious) Hawk and Tim, I wish we got to see more of Tim and Mary! I really liked their friendship :(

fellow travelers ask game

[sparklinpixiedust]

Episodes 1&2

1. Dickie.

Although making it the brother/manager who Ben subtly treats like shizz seems a little bit obvious , it's possible he was atleast involved in the murder in some way, even if he didn't directly kill him. Plus as his manager he could've had access to those hankies.

2. Clifford and Mom

See I'm a little confused her because on one hand it was Clifford's first time being a producer so they wanted the show to go well so they wouldn't have done anything.

Buuut the mother also says it'll make great headlines if the star of their show came back from the dead. Could they have planned to kill ben just enough to make sure he comes back to life so it'll bring enough media to the show?

3. The camera guy? Idk. He wasn't really un the first 2 episodes but he was jn the trailer. I don't think he had anything to do with the murder, probably just here to help Mabel figure out her life.

4. Howard.

So I've seen the reasons, winnie, the note in s1 and all that. It's possible it could be him, but idk I feel like I need more of a reaosn to believe he'd mess up a play.

5. Jonathan

So Ben was kinda mean to him , with the whole " I'll make sure you never step foot on the stage " thing so in a typical murder mystery , it's less likely to be Jonathan since it would be a little obvious. There's some beef there though , wonder what that was about.

6. So as far as i believe, I don't think it was any of the actors who mightve done it. Lorreta , Kim(?), Ty etc. Because if Ben dies, the show could get canceled, which ruins their chance to perform and hopefully get more jobs and fame later on. Would they risk that? Likely no.

7. The stage manager.

She has that " I don't take shizz from no one vibe" . Likely not her but she definitely knows something useful that she had initially thought was nothing but the trio eventually use it as evidence.

8. It's possible we haven't been introduced to the killer yet.

[teamdays]

tagged by @oceanfossil ! 🐟

fav color: green, i dont have a specific favorite hue though. i like them all 🍵 <- this shade is good though

last song: don't be fooled by weird love (pinocchiop)

last tv show: im going to be honest i havent watched an actual show in months. i think it mightve been scott pilgrim takes off?

sweet/spicy/savory: savory maybe.... or sweet... i would pick sour if i could

relationship status: i think if another person even looked at me at the moment i would emit a high pitched sound to scare them away. i need to be by mysealf right now 🦭‼️

last thing googled: leather loafers (i want to dress more masculine.. but in a gentlemanly way... but i have no gentlemanly shoes...)

current obsession: the very curious animal known as a seal 🦭 now and forever. though for something more specific/not obvious then perhaps cocoppaplay

last thing read: the summer hikaru died (i finished binging the whole thing five minutes ago)

something im looking forward to: finding time to finish a commission for a friend ! hopefully this weekend! (so i can get an excuse to draw and also use the money for a paid proseka outfit...)

ok thats all POOP SEAL ATTACK!!!! not tagging anyone but feel free to do this it was really fun!!!

[spiderton]

so like for a bit i wanna reflect a little and i guess explain why im not a huge fan of the bonedeths/ah-oohs. and its pretty easy because

considering the fact theyre all huddling up in a karmen bunker(?) and sonarchy frequently used (in his introduction missions anyway) karmen structures to try and trap the uberhero and co

i think its a bit worse though considering this is a one-off line. from what i recall nothing about the karmens even comes up again. the same mission also references princess being stuck in an egg via naughtyfins, and it takes place /in/ a jungle.. if anything, theyre spitting out pata2 references and not actually doing anything with it (aside from naughtyfins being a love interest). anytime dynasty or ancient dynasty in this game is used i think its just.. obviously referring to the ah-oohs because thats what they call themselves

which like. if i had to be real. enslaved people is a big fucking deal and patapon literally slides this off and focuses on the dark heroes it is dark subject matter yeah but they put in a obviously implied murder suicide.. its just really disappointing in my eyes, something as serious as that could explain the karmens motivations and especially ormens but it never gets anymore depth

and like sonarchy and covet die at the end. thats obviously implied and as i stated. murder suicide. in a way sonarchy died for whatever sins the dynasty had done to end suffering, but it honestly feels. hollow for me considering we never see Any Other Side that was the one hurt from the dynasty and covet hisses actions.

this is moreso gonna be a ramble but the game if it explores the last remaining ah-oohs then why dont we get any exploration of karmens who were affected by the dynasty? karmens never even appear ingame but the zigotons and fucking akumatans get a pass apparently

im not saying its written incredibly awfully or anything im just disappointed in what couldve been something insightful and important of. dunno. colonization. the awful impacts of it on cultures and teaching random kids playing it for the jrpg that its disgusting

but like i take a look at the fandom and because of it being mentioned /once/ in a cutscene, a lot of people had forgotten about it. it feels a bit worse too when people straight up make up that covet hiss and the generals werent colonizers but their further ancestors were

its complex though because the obvious elephant in the room is that. covet hiss is a trans women and slogbuzz can be seen as old gay men. hell even fucking sonarchy. its a weird case to think about but even other queer people can be racist, but its fucking weirddd to see explicit trans women be written as envious and implied to be a fucking colonizer

it just feels off to erase whatever actions the ah-oohs mightve done. sonarchy i feel despite his connections to his mother ended himself and her because of the dynastys actions and struggling to stay alive to continue hurting people who did nothing but exist, and bleed whatever labor and creations they have made for their own use.

but at the same time patapon just throws this as a single line, and continues on with its story without another word to the karmens. unless i had forgotten it..

but its just. disappointing. we never really see a karmen themselves stand up to the ah-oohs. that wouldve been nice. but we didnt get that.

[memryse]

i loovee love love analyses and essays and CONVERSATIONS about the life series, so coming across your blog has been a twist of the fate strings. then discovering you have a literal analyses tag oml... i actually clutched my chest and leaned back to breathe. i will be doing some heavy reading, hopefully. anyway, this is something i talked about in a convo a couple weeks back ^_^

--v

I also find it funny how ren shot scar... didn't scar shoot ren in third life.. I love the ren vs scar and martyn vs grian thing. like,, the instinct is to go, oh, grian vs ren surely, but no! the dichotomy is so much more interesting the other way!

both ren and scar could be described with passion. they are both very passionate. ren is a bit ostentatious and loves the flaire and the display, but he does care about his people, he did love the people of dogwarts. impulse's betrayal did hurt.

and scar.... well scar is passionate in every other way. he loves the craft and the creative and doesnt fall short in any way there. in a sense, he also enjoys the delivery for its flaire, but it's for gain, its for the con, for the benefit. it benefits him and he will tap into charisma to achieve that. and with relations, well. he did love his people, and his 'people' was grian. people mean everything to him even if he doesn't want to make it seem that way. sure people know that he thrives off of interaction, but he lives off of it, it's not just a part of his game, it's a part of him. he keeps up the facade throughout third life, but we know how terribly isolation impacted him in last life.

so his people in third life was grian, and that was enough until the end. then it got tricky and confusing, and suddenly it seemed he may have gotten too attached, that maybe it was obvious he had gotten attached, and he regretted his next decision --- to betray grian.

and then martyn and grian, of course we have the contrast of knowledge. both of them have something to do with the divine and both were there in evo. watcher vs listener, or whatever they may be. both of them weren't the leaders of their supposed factions (scar was technically the forefront considering grian was there because of the deal, but they were equals in many other ways, unless you want to lean into the discussion that grian was the aggressor..., of sorts, of monopoly mountain, and he just used scar's reputation as a scapegoat. it's certainly a delicious outlook to chew on.)

both grian and martyn could've gone down very different paths if they'd chosen someone else. grian wouldve allied with someone else if not for the prank gone wrong. martyn wasn't decisive on ren till a few episodes in, he was still considering building a separate base on a mountaintop, he was this close to allying with jimmy, but jimmy already had scott. they had those paths in front of them, whereas scar was always going to end up in the desert, and ren was always going to end up in his enchanted fortress atop the hill.

but those stories would've played so different without grian, without martyn. scar mightve stayed alone if no one would've spared him their attention, especially considering he was yellow; ren would've... still established renchanting, of course, but the other contracts he had with etho and impulse and the like were nowhere like the one with martyn. dogwarts was born because of martyn's presence, and there's no doubt about it to me. he wouldn't have become the server's powerhouse, he would've instead ended up like the wet dog (aff) he always ends up as in other series, where he doesn't have martyn at his side. martyn was also indebted to ren, albeit not as strongly as grian to scar, considering he technically used ren's services before they were ready and had to repay him somehow. except he chose to stay. he explicitly told ren why he wanted to stay. grian kept reminding scar he'd leave as soon as he could, he wouldn't stay for him. he even said it the day of the 3-kill trap, if i remember correctly! as though he didn't relish every moment.

both grian and martyn were bound to another by the means of a deal.

and whereas it was a business partnership that became a loyal union for dogwarts, it was a soul pact that became a business alliance for the sandlands, at least that's what they want you to believe.

monopoly mountain and dogwarts were always destined to clash.

it was there from the first death till the very last, from the first episode and the first pact, to the final consequence of these contracts upon their deaths; loyal or betrayed, shoulder to shoudler or fist to fist

YEAHH THIS IS EPIC hope you have fun reading my analysis tag!!! i’m always happy to talk abt any season but usually with my own stuff i’m either talking about general themes in the life series (my fave thing ever ^_^) or last life specifically. 3rd life is my favourite of the three but last life has my brain in a chokehold anyway

and yeah god i absolutely LOVE grian-martyn and scar-ren parallels. grian martyn stuff makes me go crazy insane to the point that ive never wanted one of my posts to get notes more than that 5 second clip because i was being deranged about it at least a year ago and it’s vindicating getting other people to understand it. im putting them in my mouth. honestly though i think both grian and martyn may have ended up alone if not for their respective chance encounters - both of them played the early game very much alone instead of grouping up. grian never expresses that that’s what he wanted to do because he gets waylaid by scar so fast, but you can kinda see it in how he immediately builds a base alone (in a location that is not ideal for more than one person living there) and how he goes for singlehandedly taking resources like the villagers rather than teaming up with anyone. actually what i think would have happened is the blue sword boys would have seen more relevance (by which i mean martyn and bigb would not have allowed grian to forget) i don’t think they would have actually all based together right from the start but i could see them being an alliance. I miss the blue sword boys a normal amount <3

i think another similarity between them is both of them actually intended to leave. martyn wanted to betray ren but ooc the timing didn’t work out, which i choose to interpret as martyn - being as capable and independent as he is - trying to convince himself he should save himself and leave ren, but he just… can’t bring himself to do anything but die for his king, he can’t go through with it. grian obviously voices his intention to leave from the start but it’s the urge to stay that he has to fight and my god does he lose that fight. before he knows it he’s a yellow life asking scar to betray everyone with him because their only true allegiance is to each other.

scar and ren on the other hand are really interesting because yeah as you said, business partnerships and loyalty. that’s really their respective driving forces. scar’s a chaotic player, his friendship can be bought as easily as his betrayal. his loyalty is literally as worthless as a piece of paper. ren on the other hand is straight laced and the very thought of betraying an ally physically pains him, he won’t even steal. they’re polar opposites. i looove seeing them juxtaposed against each other bc they’re the greatest opposites in the whole of the life series i think and that’s what makes it so natural that they were the main conflict of 3L! they’re everything <3 they did in fact kill each other in 3L/LL, and also fun bonus in DL their soulmates both cheated on them with the other’s soulmate and both of them were indirectly killed by grian. ^_^

[kodzumie-archived]

im not sure if i even remember the pseudonym i had on this blog, nor if i want, but all i know was that it was on the emoji display of your regular anons wall. that might serve as some sort of identification

though it mightve been the purple pixel alien, i can't be sure

regardless, time moves on; we've all progressed in our lives, we've grown. yet i cannot help but think about you, and what happened to you. you remained one of the most impressionable authors to me thus far; your articulate prose was a contributing factor, yes, but you were just so... kind. and sweet to us. it stuck to me like honey, never of the saccharine likes-- only that which was unbearably hard to wash off my skins surface

i don't know what happened to you, and i wish i knew-- it might be a bit selfish, or intrusive, given how we don't actually know each other, but gods... sometimes, in the back of my mind, i recount all the people ive come to be estranged with and i know your vague visage one of them, one of those i worry for. i hope you're okay. i sorely wish you're okay and well and alive

and i really, really wish that the possibility you're dead is false-- i almost need it to be, you had come to feel like a friend to me; your disappearance happened in early 2021, when covid was still relatively rampant. if what i fear has presumably happened, then you mightve contracted covid and passed. you mightve had your life unfairly reaped by others, too soon. that's what i thought had happened-- it's the only conclusion i have at my disposal, how i not, being honest?

maybe you felt burdened, maybe you ran away because of an external cause. that mightve been better, knowing you're still out there, somewhere, with a chance at happiness

if you're reading this, if you're alive and well (i hope you are. i wish you are), just... hell, i don't even know what i want you to know.

just know i care for you-- undoubtedly so. many people who have come to know you care for you, and i can bet some people on this blog alike i, care for you dearly, and wish the best.

p. s. ive recently discovered my penchant for literature, and i sorely want to ask you for advice on prose. on writing. on everything there is you could provide an answer to. some days i return to your published works and i attempt to mimic your style; is it because i envy you? because i want to be as good as you are?

or because i want to preserve you in some way-- in the thing i use daily? in poetry and art, that which i love the most?

... sometimes i beat myself up for being no where near your level, but how can that be reasonable? i just recently started practicing, and it's clear your work has had years of effort dedicated to honing your craft.

and i think, "they seem around college age. they've so much infront of them; i hope they've successfully chased their aspirations"

and i think, "i can be good. i can grow to be good. it will be okay"

and i think, i want you to be okay. of all things, above all things.

i want you to be okay.

i wish you were here

First and foremost—thank you.

Thank you for keeping me in your thoughts. Thank you for your concern. And, of course, thank you for your kind words.

I’m truly blessed to have had such kind individuals to support me and my work two years ago. Please know, even in my absence, you’ve (all) been in my thoughts.

So, at the very least, I hope I can provide closure to you, in addition to my apology for leaving you with your worries for so long.

I am alive! Evidently.

Although a lot has happened since I left this blog—my mental decline culminating in an eventual breakdown and hospitalization—I’m better now than I’ve been in, well, ever.

So... Yeah! It’s been a bit of a ride on my end, and I’ve grown a lot since 2021.

The most obvious change being that I’m no longer the angsty fourteen-year-old I was when I used to run this blog—trying to grow up faster than I should’ve.

I still write (because without it, who am I?), and I still am present on Tumblr.

I’ve shifted my interests, I’ve been practicing diversifying my writing style, and it makes me beyond happy to hear you exploring literature as well!

I’m not sure how I can properly convey with words how thrilled I am to hear that I’ve been a source of inspiration for your pursuit of writing, but please do know that—from the bottom of my heart—I’m cheering for you!

Writing is hard.

It’s difficult, and it’s easy to feel like the expectations you set for yourself aren’t being met, and it’s so, so easy to give up.

But know that your words are true.

You can be good, better than good—you can be great.

And I hope, someday, I can be given the chance to read your work!

Truth be told, I struggle reading my older works, seeing as my style’s changed a lot since then. And, sometimes, it’s difficult to read my current writing.

We’re always looking for ways to become the best we can be. But isn’t that what’s so inspiring about creatives?

I remember our conversations!

(If you’re recalling correctly—then I do genuinely remember and hold dear the conversations I’d had with you, 👾 anon! I fondly look back on the drawings you’d send, and vividly recall how in awe of your talents I was).

I care for you. I’ve cared for you. And I will continue to care for you.

It’s a bit funny to think about, actually—how you look back on my writing and emulate it when, truthfully, I’ve always kept your drawings in mind and, too, have tried to emulate your talent in art!

I guess it goes both ways, our appreciation of one another, and it warms my heart to hear it.

Thank you for the fond memories.

Although I don’t plan on creating any new content for this blog, and I’ve passed from my interest in Danganronpa—you’ll forever hold a place in my heart!

I’ve decided against deactivating.

I’m too attached to completely sever the relation I have with this account and the people I’ve met (mutuals and anons alike).

So, if ever at any point you'd like to contact me, feel free!

Regardless of the reason, I’ll always be happy to hear from you. Even if we’re just friendly strangers online and don’t know each other beyond that, perhaps we can come to be close friends.

I’m sorry for vanishing, and I’m sorry for having worried you.

I hope, with every fiber of my being, that you’ve been alive, well, and happy. I hope you’ve been pursuing your passions, and that life has been treating you well.

If nothing else, know that—even in my absence—I’ve kept you in my thoughts.

Thank you for everything.

I hope we can meet again, my dear.

[musicoftheheart]

8,10,18,21,22 in the pride asks? especially 21 if its not too personal, as someone still in their mid teens any advice would be nice to read. also 26/27 since ur genderfluid, like do u like to switch between different terms or do u use gender netural terms all the time?

hi!! thanks for your questions <3

8. Describe your gender without using any words traditionally related to gender:

i dont wanna use the same answer twice but... im gonna: spin the wheel!! watch where it goes!! where will it stop? who the fuck knows!!

10. Something that gives you gender euphoria (whether you're cis or trans):

singing when i have a cold is fucking gorgeous. my range lowers so much and i can sing all the male musical theatre roles that i usually cant and its just- bloody hell its the best feeling ever!

18. How old where you when you got to attend your first Pride? Who did you go with?

so, ive actually never been to pride :( im going to one this year though, and im so excited!! its in july for some reason, but ive got time booked off work, a hotel booked in the city its in (because its like 2 ½ hours away from me) and a couple of outfit choices in the mail waiting to arrive!! so, to answer the q: ill be 19 (my current age anyway aha) and im actually going alone, because i dont have queer friends atm and my cishet friend probably wouldnt be seen dead at pride. my brothers mightve come if they could, but theyre travelling to america a few days before and wont be back for over a week :(

21. What message would you give to your younger self?

to me personally? keep your mouth shut. bide your time, wait until you have better circumstances. keep. your mouth. shut.

to anyone else? dont do that ^ be confident!! as long as its safe to do so, express yourself!! the truth about life is that people will always find faults with you. they will always nitpick, they will always judge. even if you hide yourself to blend in, there will always be something that someone will scour to find. as shitty as that sounds. so be yourself! if people stare, let them! being like everyone else is boring anyway, and although at first it might be lonely or scary, youll find your people <3

22. How do you usually celebrate Pride month?

i like to do it in "subtle" ways. i say subtle because theyre not super obvious, but theyre easy to spot too. i like to paint my nails rainbow and wear rainbow earrings (i recently got rainbow star earrings and theyre so cool!!), and ill usually do more extravagent makeup on fem days, like using coloured eyeliner or putting little stars on my cheeks. and, of course, this year ill be at a pride parade too!

26. How do you feel about the term partner rather than husband/girlfriend/etc?

27. What gender-neutral terms for yourself or others do you use (i.e. joyfriend)?

im gonna answer these two together :) so, i like partner a lot. its simple, but it gets the job done just the same as bf/gf etc. i personally like to switch/mix and match boyfriend and girlfriend as and when it feels right to me. i especially love when someone says "shes my boyfriend/hes my girlfriend" and if i ever come out as genderfluid to my brothers, id want them to introduce me like "shes my brother/hes my sister". of the two mismatched pairings, i prefer the female pronouns and male honorifics, but that might turn out to be a day-dependant thing

[flockofdoves]

i wanna get back in the habit of noting things down about my experience with recipes and still remember my thoughts about one from earlier this week:

made this recipe on wednesday https://www.garlicandzest.com/spicy-sausage-soup-with-white-beans-shells-and-kale/

it was good for something super simple to make! i realized while eating it it was so so similar to a meal my mom used to make me that i loved and had totally forgotten about. i saw her a couple days later and she said it was from a cookbook she still owns so i need to ask her for a picture of the recipe once she's back at her home

was super in the mood for something with ditalini when i set out to find a recipe like this and while it was fun with ditalini i do think in the end the choice of shells would've done even more for it with how they would've held the broth

really wanted to make my own stock but waited til too late in the day so made it with low sodium chicken stock and honestly it worked out great even with just that

couldnt find lacinato kale but curly leaf kale still worked great

the one thing really is the recipe calls for a 19oz can of cannelini beans but i didn't really see one in the store that size? only 14.5oz and 29oz so i used a 29oz can and when i went to weigh it out (i like to be specific when first following a recipe to understand where to adjust later) it was just very obvious that 19oz was not enough so i think it was a typo for 29oz. even 29oz though tbh if it wasn't annoying to put in like another half of a 14.5oz can i think that would have been even better

the recipe was smart to suggest separating the pasta for leftovers so you don't have all the broth soaked up but also the pasta not cooked in the broth kind of cut into the flavor a bit by being too bland. my gf said afterwards that she thinks she mightve put less salt in the pasta water than i usually do so there's a chance this might not necessarily be much of an issue in general, but regardless if its not too much more work and time it does sound kind of nice to take out some of the broth to cook the pasta to really infuse the flavor kinda like i would for a normal pasta sauce but still allowing the pasta to be saved for leftovers separately