#even if they are hurting themselves. you can try to help but if someone doesnt want help then leave them tf alone

[phantajam]

my hot take about descendants is that NONE of the core four were ready for a relationship until maybe like, the third movie (rant in tags)

[local-limebug]

what the fuck is up with the rise in trans hate how are people this sensitive about what someone else wants to do with their own body

[snekdood]

i honestly just think gen z and gen alpha have an issue with communication in general and thats causing a lot of fucking issues.

[nakakabaliw]

(⚠️Talk of SA/Abuse Victims/Anya Mouthwashing)

⚠️If you need any "credibility" i am also a victim of abuse.

My Thoughts on #GIRLBOSS Anya

TW: S/A , Abuse

Some people need to realize that not all victims of abuse are empowered #girlbosses and are in fact scared to face their abuser bc of power dynamics and such .

Sometimes people just arent able to stand up to them, and thats okay. Its easy for some to say "oh they should fight back" but its really not :( often times their abusers are people in power, or close to them that they wouldnt want to antagonize in fear of disappointing them or for them to do the worst.

Sometimes victims may not even realize they were being abused/manipulated, and sometimes they downplay their own suffering bc its easier than fighting back.

That isnt to say that "victims should just comply to their abuser", its definitely not, and if you are suffering from abuse please seek as mucb help as you can. Im referring to people who always assume that if victims just "tried hard enough" they could defeat their abuser.

This is why often times I feel a little off put by depictions of Anya being this girlboss character who couldve defeated Jimo Because it sorta downplays her fear of him. Yes, we wouldve loved to see her succeed and win, but she was honestly scared. She was doing her best to please him by cheering him on and folding in when he berates her.

Personally I also want her to take that gun/axe and hit him where it hurts, but as a victim of a similar (not SA) type of abuse where people who controlled/manipulated were far above me, I symphatize with her.

Her death and her folding up, her taking drastic and risky measures such as hiding the gun case when she told Jimo about her pregnancy. Her struggling to open up about it bc shes been dismissed already by Curly, who couldnt believe that someone hes close to would do such an act and is trying way too much to balance both sides.

This is all just my opinion. Theres really nothing wrong with making a victim stand up for themselves, in fact yes, it should be celebrated. But also dont dismiss when a victim doesnt do that due to fear/trauma.

TL;DR: sometimes victims can dismiss their own abuse for the sake of safety.

Pls keep in note that im speaking from complete experience and am no way a psych major or anything. This is just my voice and opinion and if you beg to differ, im open to discussion ^^ please be respectful!

[noihavenosanitythanksforasking]

thinking about how milevens tend to assume that bylers want mileven to break up just because we want byler to happen.

no love

wanting byler to be canon and wanting mileven to break up are two separate wants.

Mike and El have their own story outside of will. Even if Mike wasn't queer and Will wasnt around this story would still be their story. Will may be a character in their story but the story is still about mike and el. Mike and Els story line is the marriage of the two of their two individual character arcs.

El's story arc is based around the fact that she was abused as a child and was dehumanized to an extreme level that no child should ever experience. She does not have an identity of her own. She wasn't raised to even expect to have one in the first place. Her story is learning to be able to her own person. To just be herself and learning who that person is.

When she met mike she created an identity around him. and identity of being the super powered mage who saved the day. that was El. then she became mikes gf and suddenly she was now "mikes gf". It wasnt until she met max that someone actually tells her that she is allowed to be her own person. "theres more to life than stupid boys" "what feels right" before Max she was just existing trying to play a role of what she was supposed to be rather than figuring out who she was or who she wanted to be. What she wanted. El is not raised to have wants. El was raised to be a weapon, a lab rat, a tool that does what they are told.

When this story intersects with a story arc like Mike has you get the disaster that is Mileven.

Mikes story arc is actually very similar. Mike is a very codependent person. He wants to feel needed. he wants to feel useful. If he doesnt have a use to someone he thinks he must be a waste of space. Mike doesnt know who he is outside of other people. He has never explored what he wants for himself. He is for other people. As a codependent person myself i can relate to this a lot. It can be hard to know what YOU want for yourself, outside of people you care about. Mike puts his loved ones before himself so much to the fact that it tends to get him into trouble more often than not. The issue with being codependent is that you become almost blind to who YOU are and what YOU need. you suppress your emotions for other people and these emotions only tend to surface when you realize that holy shit. i cant do anything here. This is the situation mike is finding himself in during season 4 and continuing into season 5. there is nothing he can do anymore. it is clear that him putting el above his own feelings and giving her what she wants in his attempt to help is not working. In fact its HURTING his relationship with el. Now mike doesnt know what to do. so he's drifting. El was his trauma partner. when things get too hard and too confusing he retreats into "el mode" where his only thought is what El needs. This is not a healthy mindset AT ALL. no matter how much the media romanticizes that sort of thing. IT IS NOT HEALTHY. you cant live like that. but now El has communicated "i dont want that. stop lying and get your shit together".

so mike is stuck. and el is stuck.

because theirs is a coming of age story. however not all coming of age stories are romantic. Mike and El cannot communicate with each other. they are both selfishly selfless in the way they treat each other.

I am going to be who you want me to be because i think thats what you want and it makes me feel secure.

this is not something you want in a relationship. a relationship is based on trust and vulnerability. being able to be youre rawest and truest form of yourself for another person. and feeling seen and loved despite it.

this is not present AT ALL in mileven as a couple. they are both discovering who they are still and are not space to be doing that in a relationship where they feel the need to hide themselves from each other. you cant find yourself that way.

wow look how much nuance i pulled from mike and el without mentioning will once. wow its almost like will is not the reason their relationship is failing

[cheatsykoopa98]

1 AM ramble but someone just pointed out to me you can see zooble's room in their pin wrapping background

not only do we get to see what their room looks like, we also get an official look of the zooble box, and a mirror for them to look at themself. now I think this might be important. pomni had a scene in ep 1 where she looks at the mirror in disbelief that she looks like that now, and we know zooble changes their parts every day. I think caine did that to "help" zooble with figuring out their gender identity, which maybe or not be helping, considering what I hear of people experiencing gender dysphoria not liking to see themselves in the mirror.

and I do think the mirror is important, we get to see a little bit of the others' bedrooms as well, kaufmo, ragatha and gangle's, and none of them have mirrors from what I can see. maybe caine noticed pomni looking in the mirror and thought pomni might want one in her room just like zooble, not realizing pomni probably hates to look in the mirror and not see herself

also lets look at the other characters bedrooms

ragatha seems to be very tidy (assuming everyone has to clean up their rooms and considering how messy pomni's room is) and not have that much stuff. a box of toys that she might or not play with considering its positioned as a seat for the piano. we dont know if she knows how to play (according to goose she knows the cello, so she could know the piano as well) and having so little fingers in her hand might actually not let her play the piano properly. caine could have just heard she likes music and put a piano in her room. also notice the piano is in the middle of the room taking center stage and we cant see a bed (yet). ragatha has mentioned nobody needs to sleep even though they can. do you think she (tries to) play the piano at night while everyone else assumedly sleeps? there is a song sheet at the piano but I cant read if it has an actual song name written on it.

also she has a shelf full of things that might be of her interest or template things caine put there. like balls of yarn, books, a gloink (how did she have a gloink before ep 1?) and a framed picture, which if it has an actual photo of someone there could open up a lot of theories to who is there. also the gloink being there points to either ragatha having already lived through a gloink adventure and keeping one in her room or keeping one after an adventure where she was hurt by kaufmo and abandoned by pomni. why would she want to keep it if thats the case?

gangle's room is very dark with black walls. we cant see much but I believe she is in a really deeper depression than pomni. I believe to the point where she doesnt have the energy to try to escape, just mask as much as she can before her happy mask is broken again, poor gangle :/

we dont get to see kinger or jax's room, even though I think there is a kinger door in the corridor. maybe kinger is too paranoid to sleep in his room. jax's only shows his door with the void breaking into view. maybe we wont get to see his room until the very end. also I remember there was a theory jax knows where the exit is, but doesnt leave. I dont think its true considering goose said jax deserves to be stuck in the circus, implying he cant leave just like everyone, but since he "has keys to everywhere", what if he has been to the void without caine knowing? pomni never made it through the end but if jax did, maybe what he saw there pushed him to be how he is now. maybe he doesnt see hope in escaping and thats why he turns into such a bad person, he could be a nihilist in that way

anyway sorry for the long post, I just had a bunch of ideas popping up in my head from this little detail I should have noticed when pomni's pin was released

not only do we get to see her room but we also see the blocks spelling CBA, not sure if the B is supposed to count or not but its the second time pomni is associated with C&A, I do believe she was an employee there

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hi! Just found your bog and I really like how you write Tim/Masky. So could I request Tim/Masky and EJ with a very caring reader, reader is mother hen-ish and gets worried about them not taking care of themselves while reader themselves doesn’t take care of themselves much either. Hope that makers sense, have a great day!

Tim/Masky and Eyeless Jack x mother hen!reader but they're a hypocrite

Giving tim and masky separate parts since I do write them just sliiiiiiightly different to each other !! Glad to hear you like my silly lil take on this dude! Was/is definitely hard to get him down while trying to appease two fandoms 😭😭

MASKY

He wont exactly stop you from treating any of his wounds when he comes home, but hes not going to be thrilled. The only time he would seek out your help is if he cant reach it. Very stubborn, while yes hes not trying to go out of his way to get hurt hes not going to be making sure hes staying totally safe when hes out doing his.. thing.. oh if you could only see his face when he sees you not drinking your water after you hound him for not staying hydrated.. he might actually try to force you to drink or get a snack. When it comes to sleep he physically holds you to him in bed.. he might not be tired himself but if this is the only way you'll get to bed then so be it

TIM

Hes a little more accepting of help than his counterpart, though its mostly out of confusion as he doesnt know where his wounds come from. Actually he can't really remember the night prior.. assuming you're unaware of everything going on with him, you just try to patch him up. Thankfully it's not usually anything more than small cuts and scrapes. Sometimes theres bruises.. moving on tim can also be a bit of hypocrite like you. He insists you take care of yourself but he forgets to apply the same standard to him.. it's not that he intentionally is holding a double standard, he just genuinely either forgets or doesnt have the energy. Mental illness can do that to someone and it sucks. But it can be turned into you both trying to do better for each other, and it sort of becomes a system.. that'd be sweet, I think, you both uplift each other over time

EYELESS JACK

All things considered, hes fairly good at taking care of himself. Granted, there will be real consequences if he doesnt.. for him and you.. so he cant take many chances. Look, missing a meal when you're a man eating demon who goes rabid when hungry is.. not the best. He doesn't want to take any chances, so even if it mentally messes with him to eat his food he still toughs it out because it's better that the alternative. I guess theres a plus that he technically doesnt need to sleep to function.. semi good enough. Actually if anything hes the one scolding you for not taking care of yourself. Being the one being looked after.. feels weird to jack..

[whumpwillow]

give me a vain whumpee. make him arrogant. make him conceited. So sure of himself, so proud of his own abilities that he looks down on everybody as lesser. He’s got a pretty face and plenty of wealth, perhaps a nobleman’s title, and he lives in complete luxury and splendor.

Now take away what makes him so proud of his abilities, or make it hard for him to do what he once did with ease, so now he struggles with even the slightest task. Take away his wealth and his reputation and his carefree life. Make him suffer endlessly, tormented without reprieve. Make him work for himself. Throw him in the dirt. Scar his face and body until he’s nearly unrecognizable, steal away his beautiful good looks until he thinks of himself as nothing but a monster.

He’s scarred and dirty and bedraggled. His hair is matted with knots and snarls and he just can’t bring himself to care. He lets all thoughts of his past go because they don’t serve him anymore when all he can do is merely try to survive, scrabbling fruitlessly at a bleak future against the torment that still plagues him.

He was once great. He was once respected. Now he wears the same stained clothes every day because he doesn’t have much else and doesn’t care what happens to him other than hoping what hurts him will hurt just a little less.

And then someone comes into his life. A someone who knows him, or at least who he used to be. Perhaps someone who knew him personally, perhaps not, and only heard rumors of the snooty nobleman with the vile temperament. This someone expects the whumpee to look down on them for being lesser, somehow, for being a commoner, or for being less skilled at whatever the whumpee used to pride themselves in accomplishing.

But he isnt. He doesnt have right to it anymore, not when he’s been reduced to this state. he’s little more than looking like a beggar or a drunkard or a madman with his messy hair and dirty clothes and scarred face and body. He hasn’t thought about his past vanity in years. He’s long since given up caring. He’s just wondering when the person will run from him, too offended by his hideous looks to stand being around him.

And then the someone, a caretaker, doesn’t run. Doesn’t cringe away at the sight of him, or at the sight of his face and body so riddled with scars and wounds that were never given the proper chance to heal.

The caretaker accepts this, and just makes sure to draw a bath for the whumpee. Caretaker helps whumpee with his hair, washing it in warm water and gently working out the knots. Whumpee doesnt know when the last time anybody had done this for them. Whumpee doesn’t remember how long its been since somebody touched them without violence.

Caretaker helps whumpee wash his face and get rid of all the dirt. They brush whumpee’s hair and whumpee is thrown back to images of their past self, when they would spend so long perfecting their appearance. Already, they feel more like themselves and yet less so, like a stranger, at the same time.

Whumpee breaks down. He hasn’t taken care of himself in so long because at first he was solely focused on survival, and later because he felt that he didn’t deserve to, that he didn’t deserve anything nice or anything from his old life, even something as simple as being clean.

Caretaker takes whumpee’s face in their hands, cupping his cheeks and looking into his eyes.

“You don’t have to suffer anymore.”

[austinsastrology8991]

Venus in the houses (p1) -> and how you convince others your a beautiful person until your not Venus is beautiful, and entrancing but she is also greedy and vain; believes she deserves what she wants. venus gets hurt if she doesnt get it, then finds someone else who will help her get it.... Venus in the First - Charming people, love to get attention and adoration from others and know how to get it through their beauty and flattery, but they expect twice the flattery from you because usually they are more charming than you, plus they know they a prize. but they are quick to be resentful when others take them for granted. beautiful people who break easily at slights > makes others fall even harder for their fragility Venus in the Second - strong values, good at self affirming themselves, and their pride/self respect swoons others. but if you question their 'code' they will literally ignore you, because they are very prideful with what they value. its what got them so far, and its usually what stole your heart in the first place. plus they valued you, and you questioned them, now they are questioning their values.... get it? you fucked everything up by making them question themselves Venus in the Third - confident players, that know how to make you sit down and listen to their every word. good with their words, until you point out a flaw, then its game over for you. so if you dont play their games they will find someone else to play with. but they know how to emulate their voice well too, can talk to you like your mother or like your duaghter... whataver your into they just want to play with your brain Venus in the Fourth - know exaclty how to make you comfortable, very sweet and mothering, but if you ask for too much, you will receive zero comfort, or maybe just one less thing. but they love to mother you, but if you dont respect your momma (them) they will either try harder to make you a mommas boy once again (they'll blame it on your mum first) or will withdraw completely and adopt a better son Venus in the fifth - love to entertain and be the centre of attention for the sake of applause. if you fall for them just know they like more than one set of eyes on them, but they only have eyes for one... so if you csn handle jealousy that will go a long way for them, because they will not stop shining for you or for anyone. its what they like okay.. you know what you signed up for so put up or shut up. plus thats what got you interested in the first place, their flair for the dramatix Venus in the sixth - love to be of service, help you with your life, be a mentor, and watch you grow as their little pet. but if you cross the line and take a shit on the carpet, they will not clean up your shit, becsuse now the role play is over and you crossed the line. and you thought they would help you because they helped you with everything else. TF IS WRONG WITH YOU? YOU TOOK A SHIT ON DA CARPET?! DISOWNED Venus in the seventh - will do anything to please you. whatever it is you want they will become it and be the perfect partner for you. they dont have many requirements because they want you to stay so badly, but if you dont give them the basic necessities that they require. they will give you the coldest shoulder till you apologize. then love bomb you all over again. then expect you to have changed, when realistically you haven't, you had only apologized. then the cycle repeats itself for eternity.

[mer-acle]

yayay (ok damn looking back im sorry this is quite the ramble/info dump)

ok so basically

after god games, apollo (the good brother he is) immediately tries to help athena, but zeus stops him. he says that if anyone attempts to help athena in any way they will end up worse than her AND that he will make sure to re-injure her to undo any healing she recieved (apollo did manage to heal her a little so and zeus Doesnt care that he hadnt told anyone that rule yet so he does in fact end up striking her again)

also, he makes it very clear that if anyone outside of the arena finds out what happened to her he will kill them

obviously athena is. very paranoid. and zeus is not one to find loophole exploitation amusing so everyone is very on edge and it's not exactly unreasonable to assume that helping her process anything or feel better emotionally (aka literally j talking to her at all WITHOUT insulting her) counts as against zeus' rules so she wont talk to anyone and they dont want to talk to her (bc of the rules, they dont want her to get reinjured and they dont want themselves to get injured, they do actually care altho they cant express that) (also idk if im going to add this, maybe zeus literally just meant no healing her, but he can't back down now that everyone's agreed that 'no talking' is part of the punishment without LoOkInG wEaK. i can make EVERYONE suffer if i want to)

and athena (who is definitely so very good at processing her emotions) is so paranoid about someone ELSE she cares about being hurt by zeus (thunder bringer flashbacks lol) """because of her""" that she literally will scream-beg anyone who comes within talking distance of her to leave before they get themselves hurt. and everyone is so shocked by seeing her in such visible distress that they don't even question it.

mEANWHILE back on ithaca ody has returned home and is very happy to see his family. telemachus excitedly goes 'and you will never guess who i met!!! i met athena!!! she helped me in a fight :D' and long story short ody finds out about the events of the wisdom saga tel was there for and puts that together with hermes' line at the end of dangerous and realizes that athena somehow got him off ogygia and that there was violence involved. and since ody is back on ithaca, that means what she left to go do is done right??? so they both start praying to try to figure out what's going on. athena knows ody and knows that he would definitely figure out that Something happened to her and that would lead to him dying so she is dead set on ignoring them. ody is half convinced that she actually hates him while tel knows for a fact that's not true and is more concerned that she's straight-up dead.

THEN penelope, smart woman she is, hypothesizes that maybe whatever athena did to free ody was dangerous and that immortals can't die so she's likely very wounded and will talk to them as soon as possible.

athena is watching them to make sure that something like this doesnt happen, at this point she's not exactly thinking straight and doesn't realize that penelope figuring things out herself =/= athena telling her, but also is so paranoid and mistrustful of zeus that she thinks he would kill her if she figured it out herself just to prove a point. (and also its penelope, so ody would actually hate her forever if she killed penelope, which yeah but she wouldn't be the one to kill penelope in this scenario but she has convinced herself she is responsible for making sure zeus doesn't kill anyone bc she has kinda always had to be the one keeping his anger in check so yay parental trauma)

athena is in a lot of pain esp after flying to ithaca and so worked up at this point so shes basically shouting at penelope to 'stop trying to understand bc everyone will die' and penelope is obviously very frightened bc a goddess showed up and started yelling at her without explaining what the problem even is (it is obvious to athena what the problem is. it is Not obvious to penelope, at least not in the moment). ody overhears this and sees her and at first goes 'why is she yelling at penelope WHAT' (wifeguy rage activated lol) but then quickly realizes that athena is basically crying and fully spiraling in a full-on mental breakdown, realizes something is Very Very Wrong, and tries to talk to her but athena panics that ODY is there now, yells something along the lines of 'STOP JUST STOP PLEASE' and then just leaves immediately.

i have more ideas but this is long enough already + also i have to go eat dinner

if u read this whole thing, ty for listening to me ramble :D

in summary, zeus successfully wages psychological warfare against athena

Gxizdtxuxdkdjfzjfxjfxjttitditzjfzjfxux

WHY

Just WHY

Biting my pillow

Oh poor baby

Crying

We must kill Zeus

The ithacan fam makes me so soft they care so much

I'm interested how (if whhhhjkmhij) this gets resolved cos I don't see any way out and that's so sad 😭😭😭

But yeah great job I'm gonna go sit in the corner to cry now, don't mind me

[thesophistiicate]

im not trying to act all high and mighty, im just genuinely confused by this... i truly dont understand girls who allow themselves to be put in degrading situations the same as the last anon? surely its glaringly obvious that man just wanted a body to use? i know i sound so mean but im genuinely actually confused whenever i hear or read girls talking about experiences like that i find it very hard to understand what would make them give the most undeserving men access to their bodies and souls like that... i can kind of understand if you sleep with a man for the first time and he treats you badly after but what i dont understand is going back again and again and expecting a different result. at that point maybe youre a little to blame as well? why would you even sleep with someone who youre not even in a relationship with? im just very lost i thought by now we all know better than to give just anyone our time. i see this even in my girl friends, theyre all so beautiful and intelligent yet they date terrible men that shouldnt even be allowed to breathe the same air as them and when they inevitably cheat or hurt them they genuinely get heartbroken and then they start to tell me about things the man has said to them and show me their text conversations and in my head im like "hes telling you right there in that message that he doesnt care about you..? what did you expect..?" sometimes it feels like girls get into situationships and relationships just to get themselves hurt on purpose because, and this is gonna sound so mean but i dont know how else to word this, but theres no way people can genuinely be this blind and stupid. i just find it so hard to feel sympathy for girls who numerously get shown and told theyre only being used for sex and still stick around for a different outcome. is that what love supposed to be? am i the one with the twisted understanding of love? am i missing something? i hope im not coming off as heartless or conceited, im genuinely confused i just dont know how to express or word it well

i'm happy to hold space for expressing thoughts imperfectly or even harshly, so long as we are willing to find understanding and not stay stuck in judgement 🤍 i would say the challenge for you here is learning to stay out of judgement (it is all right to acknowledge that's not how you would act, but attaching value statements and labels like 'stupid' don't help you be kind and don't help anyone else thrive either), and leaning into empathy (finding understanding when someone acts in a way you wouldn't, rather than judgement and frustration).

i say this as someone who used to be really judgemental, not to tell you off, but because it's so good for the soul to learn this growth. judgement and labels are easy, it's far more difficult to build the emotional intelligence to hold space for nuance and complexity, to extend compassion and nurture even when somebody is making imperfect decisions.

i think that you're someone with a really good level of self worth and self respect who cares about others too. that's so amazing! the best thing you can do is continue to hold your standards and lead by example. you aren't the one who has it wrong at all. healthy, respectful relationships aren't like this! keep your standards high, show your friends examples of high standards. as much as it will feel like they aren't listening, sometimes a simple, fairly neutrally toned: "wow, you deserve better" or "geez, i wouldn't put up with that" or "that's not normal" will linger and have more long-term impact than you realise.

i know it's easy to look in from the outside and say, can't you see it?! he just sucks!! or to look at the end of a crazy story and be like, girl, there was SO many red flags wtf!! (lol me at my past self!) but when you're in the middle of it, it's actually really hard. these people are master manipulators and they know how to keep their victims hooked. love bombing, mixed signals, disrespectful treatment to lower self worth... it's a wild ride inside the storm, you simply cannot see clearly because they are committed to obscuring the view.

at the core women get themselves into these situations because of low self worth. it's why i talk about it ALL THE TIME, it's SO CRUCIAL. when you don't value yourself, you put up with being disrespected. the more you are disrespected, the lower your self worth drops and the more bad treatment you accept. it's a toxic cycle. it's the exact same dynamics as in any abusive or domestic violence scenario (even if the relationships aren't abusive and he's just casually disrespectful - that is the beginning of abuse), and it's pretty well researched why women stay, how they get in those situations, why they find it difficult to leave, why the cycle keeps repeating with new partners. i'd highly recommend researching it if you want to understand it better. every woman should be educated on this topic.

you are right to some extent: if you want to get out of the cycle you do have to take responsibility for your own behaviour. you have to ask why you're accepting being treated that way. what led you there. why you are obsessing over their behaviours but not questioning your own.

but to confront all this is very difficult and painful and often related to trauma and neglect. yet another reason why so many can't escape the cycle, to face all of that can be more painful than putting up with a shitty guy who just wants sex without commitment... the crap treatment is easier to face, until it isn't.

it is a form of self-harm, a kind of self-destruction as a way a broken mind and spirit tries to cope with trauma. to end the relationship would be to limp out and finally confront how broken you are. when you stay in it you can stay delulu. it's a form of escape.

of course, to a healthy person it doesn't make sense. why would anyone ever willingly hurt themselves? and yet, it's a psychologically observable phenomenon and unfortunately the solution and path to healing is far more complex than just not doing that or getting into those situations. if only!!

but the way out DOES involve making a decision that you deserve better. which is why we need to keep talking about these things, bringing them to light, being compassionate, creating safe spaces for women in these relationships to talk about what they're experiencing without judgement, shame, being called stupid or asking for it etc 🤍

i could speak for a long time on this, but i'll leave it there for now... it's all right to not understand it. i actually think that's a good thing in a way, it means you're in a good place. but certainly if you really want to understand it, the research is there!

[dangerousartisanwerewolf]

To All Americans doom scrolling Tumblr right now:

First and foremost I am so sorry for all of you guys. You all did your part but hatred seems to have unfortunately won. I am also incredibly disheartened for all of you and for once in my life I honestly don't know what to say (which is odd for me lol).

Just know

That you did your part. You voted and did your part and that's all you can do.

It's not your fault. Period. Not to sound defeatist but one vote will not decide the fate of an entire election

Life will go on and we will keep on living. I know it doesn't seem like it right now but we will keep going and we will keep living our lives.

Things will get better, it maybe doesnt seem like it right now but things will ger better

I have sadly seen many people on here talk about killing themselves or pleading others to stay alive. As sad as that notion is, it is a very real concern for many now.

As many others have mentioned: PLEASE DON'T KILL YOURSELF OR RELAPSE IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM OVER THE ELECTION RESULTS!!!!!!!!! I know it may feel hopeless and like there is nothing else you can do but please don't. I mentioned many things you can do to distract yourself in a previous post if you want to look.

There are many $u1c1d3 hotlines and other mental health resources available you can access. Please do if you feel like you need to

List of hotlines/ help resources to call/talk to:

Sorry I can't link anything because I am not tech savy but hopefully a list is useful too. Got most of these off of instagram so maybe you'll see the posts circulating around. Keep in mind I am a minor who does not live in the U.S so if these are not the most helpful don't flame me.

LQBTQ Resources:

The 988 lifeline- 988lifeline.org (Call,text, or chat)

The Trevor project- thetrevorproject.org/get-help (24/7 crisis counselling)

SAGE x Hearme-sageusa.org/hearme (On demand mental wellness app)

LGBTQ center directory- lgbtqcenters.org/LGBTCENTERS (Centre directory, find one near you)

PFLAG- pflag.org/findachapter (Find a chapter near you)

QChat space-qchatspace.org (Online Lgbtq community for teens)

Suicide/crisis hotline

Dial 988 or visit 988lifeline.org

Warm lines that don't call the police:

Call blackline- 800-604-5841 (Centre's BIPOC, LGBTQ, Black femme lens)

Trans lifeline-877-585-8660 (U.S number) Canada has one of these too if you need it

Wildflower alliance peer support line- 888-407-4515 (Trained peer supporters

Strong hearts Native helpline- 844-762-8483

Thrive lifeline- 313622-8209 (Trans led and operated)

LGBTQ national help center- 888-843-4564

Hope that helps

Other easy ways to take care of your mental health:

Take a social media break/hiatus

Hang out with friends or family

Get out in nature (Go for a hike, bike ride ect)

distract yourself with comfort media

read

do something creative

practice a hobby

I already have a post with a pretty extensive list of stuff you can do to distract/cope if you need any ideas. I'm not going to copy it all out but its just a little down from this post in my account if you scroll.

Above all please stay safe:

Many have mentioned this but make sure you stay safe too, especially if you are in a red state where people may be looking for an opportunity. As fucked up as it feels to even type this out:

Scrub your socials of anything that may "Give you away" if you feel you need to

If you know someone who is queer, trans, poor, pregnant, an immigrant, needing an abortion, getting an abortion done, or anything that could make living dangerous to them- no you don't. try and keep loved ones safe if you can

Don't out yourself for being any of the above things if you can help it

Don't engage in politics talk with people if you can help it. If someone asks what party you supported don't tell them, they may just be looking for information they can use

One last reminder:

Please remember to:

Eat regular meals/remember to eat at all

Drink water

Take screen breaks (As it will hurt your eyes and give you a headache)

Go to sleep at a regular time

don't bed rot all day

don't doom scroll election content all day

turn off the news at some point, its not healthy to sit and watch the news all day

get out in nature/step outside and touch grass and get some fresh air if you can

talk to your loved ones and seek support if you need

get off social media for a bit (Even if you say all day social media doesnt make a difference to you I know it does)

make sure to take it easy today if you can, take care of your mental health and I hope that everything will be alright for you guys. Stay safe out there

[atla-confessions]

I wish they would because it'd be funny as fuck but it might kill the mod

Lets put this in terms you might understand. Im going to repeat what you said, and then make a Katara 'critcism' of equal value

zk: aang is kind of inattentive and gets distracted easily

"Katara is kind of mean and gets really prideful and self-righteous"

These are two things Aang does, and two things Katara does, but if we made this Katara's entire fucking personality, that would be anti Katara

zk: aang yelling at toph was kinda shitty

"Katara making the blind comment at Toph was kinda shitty."

"Katara saying Sokka didnt love their mom like she did was kinda shitty."

The statement about Aang is true, as are these statments about Katara. If we were to call Katara a bad friend because of these, or toxic, or bring it up as reason that Katara isnt deserving of Aang, that would be anti Katara

zk: aang getting so jealous at the idea of Katara being with someone else that he would go into the Avatar state is kind of problematic

"Katara getting so jealous of Aang she says shes not going to come watch him ride the unagi to make sure hes okay is kind of problematic"

Neither of these statements are true. Both are ignoring the larger context and making their behavior out to be jealousy when its not. Aang was upset about the play as a whole. His comment about the avatar state was clearly not a literal thing, but him trying to express how upset the play as a whole has made him. Katara was upset Aang was being irresposible and letting the praise get to his head and didnt want to come watch him show off.

Aang doesnt even show any jealousy in this scene, zutara shippers just like making it about themselves. Aang doesnt mention Zuko once. Hes not thinking "Katara might have feelings for someone else" hes thinking "I dont know where I personally stand with Katara as she has been sending mixed signals." Which is, frankly, reasonable, even if he went about trying to express this in the wrong way. Thats not jealousy, thats a basic desire of wanting someone to communicate with you.

Painting Katara's frusteration and refusal to care about the potential of Aang getting hurt as just toxic jealousy would be anti Katara.

zk: here's a fic where aang faces consequences for burning Katara

Now, before I go into this one, lets remember the real consequences Aang faced, like getting jumped and slammed into the ground, like feeling so guilty as to swear off something he needs to save the world, like this incedent shown to be one of the things that haunt Aang the most when hes opening his chakras. Like this insident (incident? Im not looking it up rn) literally being the context in which he allows Zuko into their lives as he believes Zuko can help teach him firebending in such a way as to avoid ever hurting someone again.

Heres a list of things Katara did and did not face consequences for: abandoning Aang along with Sokka because Aang withheld a map for a few hours, stealing a waterbending scroll and sneaking to use it despite agreeing not to and putting everyone in danger, (she got saved and still got to keep the scroll, even made it very obvious she felt no remorse for this, I consider that not facing consequences), making Aang think Appa was sick, telling people Aang is the avatar because shes proud of it despite that putting Aang in danger many times, encouraging Aang to throw himself at problems with no help like Hei Bai and the NWT invasion, stealing appa after Aang said he did not want her to.

If someone were to write a fic where Aang's mistakes are ignored, and these mistakes of Katara's were emphasized and used as reasoning shes not good for Aang, to the point where they add consequences that didnt happen but could have happened, like Aang getting captured and/or hurt in order to make her feel guilty, that would be, say it with me, anti Katara.

When someone ephasizes or exaggerates a characters flaws while ignoring their good deeds and qualities, that is being anti, not fair criticism, especially if they do it while ignoring most of the flaws and mistakes another character has made and treating them as near perfect and a victim of the first character.

Most zutara shippers are not interested in analyzing the show for the sake of fair criticism of characters. If they were, they would be pointing out Katara's mistakes just as often as Aang's. They are only interested in justifying their dislike for Aang.

X

[cowchickenbeefpork]

Ummm thoughts about Ed’s NPD and BPD? Interested to hear especially after reading your fic

AAAAA THANK YOU FOR READING IT!!!!! with my worldview of Ed having both I feel like his NPD is more prominent and noticeable, it's his first go-to when it comes to his defenses even if he is hiding it (aka season one, I would say he is more overt in his narcissistic vulnerability while covert in his grandiosity in that season, he flip flops around a lot in his presentation on his narcissism in the series buttttt from what I can remember he goes back and forth from hiding his grandiosity but not hiding his vulnerability to hiding his vulnerability but not his grandiosity.) his bpd came first to me, and since most people dont like those traits and he often gets maniuplated for them, he tries to repress it and focus on his narcissism. his npd also keeps him from splitting on himself more often too, both borderlines and narcissists often times see everything as either good or bad, you either are all good or your all bad, which is why treatment is often very hard for both of these groups because no one is all good or all bad. this is why narcissists try to avoid anything that shows a flaw in how they view themselves, they cannot have done a bad thing, since doing a bad thing means they are a bad person, their defenses are more stable and hard to overcome than a borderlines because of this.

i think a easy way to tell is how people with npd and people with bpd split. since npd is more so focused on the self and maintaining the ego, theres three catergories of viewing relationships instead of just two. the first one is someone to perform to, someone to get easy praise from and being able to keep your self essteem in check so you can still feel good about yourselves ( i dont think i need to state here that narcissistss dont actually love themselves, only the image they are trying to contain, this kind of splitting can also be seeing the person theyre performing for as a equal but its not really close, its more superficial ). the two other types are more devaluing, the second kind of narcisstic splitting is seeing someone as someone to inghore, someone who just does not get it and is too stupid too ever get it, the thrid one is the most simliar to borderline splitting since it sees the other as a predator, someone trying to sabotage and hurt them and trying to vitcimize them.

bpd splitting is more so focused on the other, seeing them as someone who is just perfect and you want to know everything about them and always make them happy and how they're just perfect, to them being someone being an abuser manipulator who never cared or loved them in the first place. both of these kinds of splitting are similar in structure but still different, narcissism still mostly focuses on the self while borderline focuses more on the other, narcissism as a defense mechanism is more so focused on the superficial while borderline is more focused on the personal.

when you apply this logic to how ed splits on people, then you kinda start to see this way of performing to keep his ego in check just does not apply to how he treated oswald! his attempts to please him and to help him were exteremly self sacfricial and often put his life on the line! he didnt need to do all of this for oswald to get oswald's praise and admiration, what he does for oswald is more simliar to a borderline wanting to do anything for their favorite person and showcase how much they care for them than a narcissist thinking they met an equal which brings their self essteem up! in the end of how the riddler got his name ed said he based his whole self worth on oswald, and instead of letting himself grieve normally, he tells himself he doesnt need anyone anymore and that hes fine now. the narcissism took over, it didnt even let him fully grieve. he didnt see oswald as just someone to bring his ego up like he did with kristen he didnt reduce oswald's existence to just that, oswald was the only person who ever loved or cared for him and was this amazing figure who ended up being someone who never actually loved him and was only using him in ed's eyes.

i would argue his relationship with lee was more so borderline too, she was the only person he was close to and was the only person who could take his shit during that whose collapse of his ego. he genuinely cared for her and was willing to kill himself out of paranoia he would hurt her! that is not narcissism, he did have narcissistic intentions with their relationship at the start of season four, but it changes into the codependency similarly to what he had with Oswald, only this time being a bit more one sided

That's why ed sticks to his narcissistic defenses more, because, to Ed, this is the only way you can love someone! you can only ever fully love someone if you would basically cut off your whole arm for them just to give them a gift, there are no boundaries! if he only acts selfish in his relationships then he will end up killing them like he did with Kristen too, so as a cope he pretends he doesn't want or desire close relationships during the later seasons, trying to paint himself as a cold logician just so he can have some admiration and praise and love but only from a distance since he knows if he gives too much, something like what happened with Oswald might happen again, and if he takes too much, something like what happened with Kristen might happen again. an Oswald will lead him into being weak and dumb, and a Kristen will lead him into being a monster who only exists to leech off and hurt others. if he just doesn't date then he can never experience either event again and can brush them off like they say nothing about him.

IDK if this whole thread makes any lick of sense, I don't think he was being borderline with Kristen but I do think he realized she was a real person with her own beliefs and opinions only after he killed her, which caused him to panic and repress any guilt or grief he had for the incident and convince himself it was no one's fault and was just destined to happen. Edward is terrible at accepting he did something awful or has emotions and needs, so he represses whatever he feels that conflicts with the image he has of himself and thinks that will be his permanent solution when it always fails him after a few months. he basically ignores and represses his borderline until he finds someone who seems like they are amazing to him which is just. kinda explodes all over the place I AM SO SORRY THAT HIS WHOLE EXPLANATION SUCKS ASS I HOPE I MADE MYSELF CLEAR ASK QUESTIONS IF I WAS UNCLEAR!!!!

[karoochui]

I just wanted to say I am so enamoured with Binary Insurgence! I eat up everything, every little crumb, you drop about it and the entire idea is so interesting to me! I'm so in love with stories and worlds like this! I'm also curious to know about the relationship between Sun and Moon, if it's alright to ask. How was it before the fire compared to after? Does their relationship begin to mend (because I'm certain over the years it deteriorated) when y/n comes back into the picture? If any of this is too spoilery or you just haven't fleshed it out yet then you don't have to answer! I'm just super curious about the boys and how you see their dynamic/relationship. I just look forward to seeing how their bond has grown and/or broken and how it may be mended over time.

AHH im glad you like it so much!! Im happy to talk about what i've got, but you are right not everything is fully fleshed out. I have points i wanna get to but while im brainstorming and planning i make up a lot of stuff as i go and then go over it again later to see if i like it or can connect stuff in any way. I have 3 chapters for Arc 1 fully summarized as of now! (Which probably doesn't seem like a lot but i like my chapters long, so it's quite a bit actually).

I wanna say, too, that i'm planning for the first story to be more in the perspective of the reader, so most things about Sun and Moon's personal thoughts and feelings are gonna be more implied than said. I might have some switching points of view, i'm not sure, but i haven't found a place i'd do it or think it's relevant. The sequel is gonna be more from their perspective since it'll mostly be about them.

NOW! I see Sun and Moon as brothers, so they really treat each other in a way that's like that. Before the fire they get along pretty well. Most instances of issue would be when Moon blocks out Sun when he fronts, or just mutual panic over the fact Moon lost his shit w/ the virus. They'll have their disagreements about things (i havent planned specifics yet) but generally they're chill. Sun just worries about Moon hurting people, but Moon worries too. With the way the virus functions in this AU it's hard for Sun to fully fault Moon for what he does, especially because he's also affected by it but not nearly as bad. (I'm gonna explain this more in another ask i have).

Plus, even before the virus they were always glitch/bug-ridden because technicians fucked up their programming continuously after removing them from the theater to work in the daycare. So they had to kinda navigate through that together, glitches and errors on both ends (though not deadly). They hate P&S bc of this, obviously. Hardware fixes suck but they fucking HATE software examinations.

Later on though some issues come into play whenever Sun starts getting worse by being further exposed to the virus (it gets worse for him when they eclipse) because it presents itself in Sun differently than it does Moon. He gets snappier and angrier at times (that comic i made that's captioned "well someones snappy") and while they both understand he doesnt mean the shit he does it's still not great. And nobody's gonna just let themselves be talked to like a dog even if the reason it's happening is because of something the other person can't really help. They're still relatively fine at this point, though.

It's at the end when shit goes really bad, because this part of the story does end badly. I won't spoil specifics but after the fire Sun loses his shit. He starts trying to put the blame on Moon for everything (the virus enhancing his already bad habits/fucking with his line of thinking) out of grief and anger. That carries over into the apocalypse and he just gets worse in general. He gets irrational.

It's a long period of time though, so he eventually also manages it, in his own way. But! I did say before in an ask that in the sequel he's "not evil, persay, but he's a fucking nut". He damns Moon to an hourglass to just fucking get rid of him about 100~ years before they meet you again (he fully thinks he's in the right for this (and he also just hates him) and the only reason he really even stayed around after that was to make sure Moon didn't get out again). He's not a bad-intentioned individual, but he's off the fucking wall at many times bc of the virus having made him worse. He's stubborn as all hell to an infuriating degree, he's irrational, hard-headed, reckless, and while a good bit of his old, kinder self is still pretty prevalent he can be downright fucking mean if provoked. Again, worse than before, and it doesn't take much these days! I always imagined him to have more dramatic, snappy, diva aspects to his personality (even before Help Wanted 2 came out) bc hes so theatrical and intense, so basically take a Sun that's like that, crank it up to 100 and put him in a Bad Situation. That's what Round 2 Sun is like at his worst. He's not a complete lost cause though, and he's far from dumb when he does stuff, just clouded by his own judgement. He doesn't think anything's wrong with him (or does he?).

Moon doesn't really hate him like Sun hates Moon, because although he knows that what happened (the ending of the first story) is technically both of their faults he just feels guilt. They do fight a lot, though. Most of it is Moon trying his best to tell Sun that he's basically full of shit and not seeing things right after Sun starts something, but Sun's at the point where he's gotta learn by consequence. Part of the reason he's so bad is bc 1: hes been infected by the virus for so long now and 2: in his grief, anger, and resentment he's learned to live with it rather than fighting it.

But the sequel is gonna be a feel-good story! Falling in love w/ the reader all over again, i want things to get cleared up - or at least some kind of middle ground between Sun and Moon - the whole sha-bang.

[barrel-of-bones-and-brain-worms]

What is your 3 favorites things about shopkeeper? (design, personality, skill)

that's a tough one...

His personality is my favorite thing because he's unhinged and not a good person at all. He'll manipulate anyone and kill at a moments notice but he's not stupid. He's cold but he's such a good actor so that many don't usually see how messed up he actually is. Yet at the same time he can be caring towards those that he has gotten attached to because he can't be normal and like someone a normal amount. It's either all or nothing. He's complicated but not by a whole lot and that can make him flexible enough to put in a ton of different aus

I like his design because it's simple but conveys enough of him while still being kinda deciving. You can look at him and tell that there's something strange about him but you wouldn't think too much about it until you learn more about him. You can do a lot with what's there and have the freedom to add things without it being too much while its still clearly Shopkeep

His lore(?) is also one of the things I like a lot. It's changed a bit from what it originally was but not by a whole lot. He's a character that was added to Crash Clear-up last minute because the developers realized it was too hard without help. He's made from scrapped parts and cut corners and shortcuts. All the way down to his very code, there are things wrong with him and they can't be fixed.

In cannon, he meets turbo and the twins through him selling items but he slowly grows close to them. His first true friends become those racers because they don't see his unhealthy behavior as all that odd because they have some questionable things themselves. He starts to fall in a unhealthy love with Turbo and just when he's about to make him his... Turbotime is unplugged and he feels so betrayed and hurt and heartbroken, his literal code sparks because of the loss.

How dare they die? How could they leave him like that? How could the arcade forget the twins and only see the one 'bad' thing that Turbo had done? How could they make it so he can't even talk about Turbotime? How could they?

But time moves on and he has to pretend to be fine when huge pieces of his world were tore away from him and he can't get them back. He has to keep up the act that he is just Shopkeep, that he's a normal character and that he doesn't sympolize with Turbo. He has to pretend that the unplugging a cabinet and all of the horrific implications that come with that are terrible and that he feels anything towards the incident. He has to hide the fact that he can see himself doing the exact same thing should the circumstances be right

Sugar rush is plugged in and he meets King Candy and something about him is so familiar. His additude, his jokes, his helmet...but that could be just because he's a racer. He reminds Shopkeep so much of what he lost that he decides that he has to get closer to him, has to make him his. King Candy is wary of Shopkeep but he proves himself over and over again. He doesn't care that he's clearly targeting a little girl, ostracizing her for some reason. That doesnt matter to him, King Candy does. He warms up to him and they become friends and over time their relationship grows strong.

Shopkeep develops feelings for him, and though it feels like betraying Turbo and all of the love he still has for him, he gets into a dating relationship with King Candy.

He loves King Candy, he is his world and all that he cares about. So the one day that he spends away from him to make him a gift, to prepare for a nice date, everything goes wrong.

Somerhing happens with Sugar Rush and he can't go inside, something about Cybugs and viruses. When he can finally can go inside the game, King Candy is nowhere to be found. It's like he disappeared and in his place was the girl he was trying so hard to keep separated from everyone else. Shopkeep asks around and finds out that he's dead. Not only is he dead, but he was Turbo, his first love, his world, part of what made him feel alive....

He feels like he was dying and he barely manages to hold himself together long enough to get back to his game and when he does he completely unravels. He goes into an intense fit of insanity and mania during which he destroys a random car because cars belong to racers

He betrayed him. He could have told him, he wouldn't have told a soul, he would've sooner game overed himself than tell anyone... But he didn't and now he's gone again and people watched him die. He's gone for good and he's never getting him back...

What the worst part is that he has to go back to pretending like he's fine like he been for all those years. He has to pretend like he's ok or everyone will see him for who he truly is and he can't allow that to happen because who is going to understand him...the only characters that did are dead and they're never coming back