#even if I tell myself they shouldn’t they will love me anyway
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thevegandarkelf · 24 hours ago
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Joshua "Scud" Frohmeyer NSFW Alphabet
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A deal was made with @francisofthespook, and here's my part of the deal. She agreed to write Daryl's NSFW alphabet if I wrote Scud's, so here it is! Massive kudos to @dixons-sunshine for proofreading my work, as always, and to @francisofthespook for proofreading as well (I proofread yours, so it felt fair for you to proofread mine lol). I hope you enjoy it! To my general taglist people, I'm sorry if this isn't something you'd normally want to be tagged in. I figured I would just add y'all anyway lmao. This is hands down the filthiest thing I've ever written and I had to stop several times to fan myself.
Also these are MY OPINION. If you don't agree with something, that's fine, but please play nice.
NSFW alphabet template by @the-coldest-goodbye, dividers by @anitalenia
18+ below the cut, minors DNI
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
He’s big into aftercare! The cleaning up, the cuddling, the pillow talk, he loves it all. I think it’s one of his favorite parts of sex. Basking in the afterglow all cozied up under the covers with you, your bodies tangled together…God, he lives for that shit. After your first time doing something new, he’d want to talk with you about how it was, how much you liked or didn’t like it, and if you’d wanna do said thing again.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
For his own, I wanna go with the obvious and say his dick, but I think (and hear me out) that his stomach would also be one of his favorites. He thinks his scars are cool and are proof that he survived something he probably shouldn’t have, and I think he loves that part of himself. For his partner, he’s a boob guy, easy. He doesn’t care what they look like or how big or small they are. They’re yours, and that’s all that matters to him. And if you have any insecurities about them, he’ll be sure to show you how much he loves them.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
He loves to be inside you when he comes, whether that’s with a condom or without. He loves the faces and sounds you make when he’s twitching inside you, riding out his high. If you allowed him to come inside you without a condom, he’d be thrilled, but he’d still check in with you the whole time up until he comes to make sure that’s really what you want.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
This might seem like a cop-out, but he doesn’t have any dirty secrets. He doesn’t have any shame in what he likes in the bedroom, so there’s no secrets between you two. If he likes something or wants to try something, even if it’s something other people might find strange, he’s going to tell you/talk to you about it. If he expresses he’s into something and you’re not down to do it, he’s not going to feel ashamed for asking. Like I said, he has no shame in what he likes.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He’s very experienced & absolutely knows what he is doing. He prides himself on being able to make his partner feel good, and all the skills he’s acquired over the years will aid him in pleasing you.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Cowgirl and doggystyle, both for different reasons. Cowgirl so he can watch you bounce on top of and fuck yourself on him. Especially when he’s high, he loves to lay there and just let you go to town again and again. Looking up at you through hazy, half-lidded eyes would make him crazy. Doggystyle (specifically facing a mirror) so he can watch you watch yourself take him. He’d lean over you and dirty talk into you ear, telling you to look at yourself in the mirror so you can see how beautiful you look taking him. Both positions are also great for him to be able to circle your clit.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Very humorous. He never takes himself too seriously, and that include in bed. Sex is supposed to be fun, and he definitely brings that. He needs someone that can joke around with him during sexy time. If he were to get more serious at any point, it would be when either of you are close to coming.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Yes, the carpet matches the drapes. He doesn’t care about grooming, though. He’s not bothered by body hair, both on himself or his partner. If you asked him to clean up a bit, he certainly would, but otherwise, he doesn’t care. He’s not unhygienic though, he just isn’t bothered by it enough to do anything about it. For you, though, he’d do anything.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
That depends on our little angel’s mood. Sometimes, he just wants to lay back and let you do the work, but he’d still praise you and tell you how good you’re making him feel. If he’s releasing some pent-up frustration, he’d still be soft with you, but he might not be as giggly or romantic as usual. For special occasions, like your birthday or anniversary, he’d really ramp up the romance, adding sensual touches like lighting candles and putting on music.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
This one feels obvious, but he thinks about you when he jacks off. Thinks about your taste, your scent, all of the sounds you made during your last sexual escapade. He drools a little when he comes, specifically when he comes from masturbating. He’s so deep in the thoughts of you while he’s touching himself that he can’t be bothered to make sure he isn’t drooling.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
He loves having his hair played with/pulled. When he’s going down on you, he lives for having your fingers tangled in his hair and gently tugging while you buck up into him. He also loves to be praised (because who doesn’t?) (it would send his ego to the moon) and give praises as well, telling you how good you feel/how beautiful you look/how good you’re doing.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Somewhere where you’ll both be comfortable, like in bed or on the couch. But if it’s a quickie, he’d take you in the shower, over the kitchen counter, even the floor as long as you’re comfortable. He’d even take you over his work bench if it didn’t risk you two getting caught.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
He gets easily turned on, especially when he’s in love. He loves seeing you in lingerie, and of course that turns him on, but he gets really turned on when you wear his clothes. Your bare breasts against the inside of his jacket, your core on the inside of his boxers, he loves it all. He’d have a hard time keeping himself together the next time he wore something of his that you had on, picturing you in it instead.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He’s turned off by anything non-consensual, he’d put his foot down at that. Even if it was something you wanted to try, he wouldn’t allow it. He’s into gentle biting and giving hickeys, but biting to the point of drawing blood is a no. Anything else that would cause either of you harm (something that would cause bruising that isn’t a hickey, leave welts, etc) is a no.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He loves both giving and receiving, but he prefers giving. He’s in heaven with your thighs clenched around his head and the taste of you coating his mouth and tongue. His skills are next level. When he’s high, his skills somehow get even better, bringing you to orgasm faster than you could’ve imagined.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Sex with him is for sure soft and giggly. He’s a goofy bean, and that personality of his certainly transitions into the bedroom. If you asked for something a little more rough, he’d obliged, albeit hesitantly at first, until he sees how much you’re enjoying it. However, that wouldn’t be often, as he prefers to be soft and slow and take his time with you.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He prefers to take his time with you and savor every second. He may have a high drive and be DTF a lot of the time, but it’s still special because it’s with you. When there’s not time & you’re both so fucking desperate and needy for each other that you can’t wait, a quickie will suffice, but he’ll be longing for more. And he’d make sure the next session after the quickie was extra special.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Yes yes and yes. He’s willing to try just about anything, and if he isn’t, he’ll let you know. He won’t shame you for any ideas you bring up or anything you might be embarrassed about wanting to experiment with. He’d be flattered that you felt safe enough with him to ask to experiment in different ways.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Depends on the type of sex. If he’s high, he’d only be able to go for one round, wanting to cuddle up and fall asleep shortly after (post-aftercare ofc, I can’t stress enough how much he loves that). If he’s had a stressful day and/or it’s been a while since you two have been intimate, he’d be able to go a few rounds, wanting to stay in the throughs of pleasure with you for as long as possible.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
He would certainly use toys on you if you asked. He prefers to do the work himself and get you off with just his touch, but he knows toys are friends, not competition. If you did the deed and he was too sleepy after to go another round but you wanted more, he’d lay there and watch you get yourself off with toys, watching your eyes roll back while he knows you’re thinking about him the whole time.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He loves to tease you until you’re a squirming mess & can’t take it anymore, whining & begging him to do what you’re asking. If you express that you like to be teased, he’d be delighted and draw out the teasing for as long as he possibly could until neither of you could take it anymore.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Our little stoner is definitely vocal in bed. He makes a variety of sexy grunts, groans, and moans, all of which sound like music to your ears. When there’s privacy, he’s loud. He doesn’t hold back at all in expressing how good you’re making him feel. If you’re ever in a situation where you might get caught or others are within earshot, he can hold back the noises, though he’d struggle to hold back the closer he gets to coming.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
This may be a hot take, but he is not a whimpering mess of a sub. A switch? Sure, I can see that. A whimpering mess that’s begging you and calling you mommy? Absolutely not, and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
He’s average-sized, maybe a little bigger than average. He’s an average-heigh guy, so it would make sense that his package reflects that. There’s a couple of veins that bulge when he’s got a boner, and they add to the pleasure you feel when he’s inside you. There’s also his scars. He loves when you give them attention, kicking and licking down them slowly as you position yourself to suck him off.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He’s got a high sex drive, especially when he’s in love. After the first time, he can’t get enough of you. Your scent, your taste, your touch…he dreams of it.  He’s so in love with you, he’d get distracted at work thinking about all the things you did the night before. And the second you’re both home, he’d be pouncing on you, ready to devour you again and again.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
That depends. If it was sleepier sex while he was high, he’d pass pretty shortly after (post-aftercare of course, once you were both snuggled up under some blankets). Otherwise, he’d want to stay awake and enjoy some pillow talk with you, admiring how beautiful you are post-orgasm and savor the moment of you two wrapped up under the covers.
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General taglist: @raddydaddydude @lovenormandixon @angeldemoncrowley @negansbestie @holdmytesseract
GIF made by me
© thevegandarkelf 2024. I do not consent for my work to be shared, translated, adapted, posted, or copied to this site or any platform without my explicit consent & evidence of said consent.
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roman-o-cheese · 1 month ago
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Happy “panic attack at the thought of doing anything” season guys!!!🎉🎉🎉
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pzos-amiserableidiot · 1 year ago
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was watching tiktok and a video had the song michael in the bathroom playing and I was vicerally reminded of being in middle and high school and mom always mentioning how much I looked like my dad (his name is michael) and how I slowly was able to start noticing it too and whenever I sang the song it reminded me of him and I felt like we were overlapping too often felt like id never be anyone but a shadow or his mirror and then i began learning i was trans and now the song makes me think of him even more (he’s not a bad dad he tells me he’s proud of me and stuff there’s just two really big moments he unknowingly failed and one long continuous one but he loves me and he’s proud and he supports me and he didn’t mean it and ive learned to make that enough) and the weird flashback I got when I heard that song and overlapping with his face and how if I transitioned I almost fear I’d be his clone and yeah Anywyas banger song
#the moments were that time he told me how he used to want something to be wrong with him and he’d cut himself to try and prove something was#and he showed me his incredibly faint scars and this was after I told them I was depressed and his solution was to tell me he faked it????#and didn’t even see anything wrong or worrying that he’d cut himself or was self destructive or wished something was wrong so he’d have#something to blame for being the way he was and like DAD THATS DEPRESSION but I was too numb and shocked and felt so so so betrayed becuase#it felt mocking at the time like his way of comforting me. his child. was to fucking show me his scars and be like I faked it so I know#it’s real and sorry I don’t understand WTF DAD#Other time was when he gave me his phone to play Pokémon go and I betrayed his trust (he didn’t like anyone going through his phone) and#went looking through and found Grindr and saw some shirtless photos and people messaging before I left#dad had a shirtlesss photo on there. and I had to pretend everything was fine and erase the evidence and give the phone back and help look#for furniture for our new house and never tell mom cause she’s been through so much already (I really shouldn’t have known I wasn’t her#therapist but this is about daddy issues right now not the mommy ones) so anyways I never told him and years later he told me his friends#signed him up for Grindr as a prank and to make friends and that’s why he thinks someone from his work I pranking him by signing him up#for a gay furry dating site and yet I saw him on his bed sometimes messaging people and yeah#oh and the long continous one was not divorcing mom and defending her saying she loves us when she rejected me and my sister for being trans#and being gone for most of my childhood working and never understanding the fucked up dynamic of home that took place and resenting him for#ruining the perfect routine (sharp words scary feelings always wanting to cry)#anyways michael in the bathroom always gives me weird feelings#cause I hate and love my dad and I looked up to him so much and loooking like him would’ve been a dream but sometiems the wrongs he did#come back haunt my thoughts and I want to scratch and tear apart every feature that makes me look like him. I look nothing like my mom so#there’s nothing physical to tear apart (I just act like her sometimes and have to force myself not the throw up and attack myself from the#disgust)
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ccsainzleclerc5516 · 5 months ago
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Little Things He Does
Pairing: Lando Norris x reader
Warnings: tiny bit of smut
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He knew that you were one of those girls who appreciated the little things and for whom physical touch was one of the biggest indicators of love.
With that in mind, Lando tries to do as many of those little things every day just to make you happy. Some of those little things he isn’t even aware he is doing that you, of course, notice and which make you love him even more if that's even possible.
For example, when you’re making your way through a crowd and paparazzi is pushing their cameras in your faces. Lando is tightly holding your hand, constantly turning to check if you're okay, keeping you close to him and trying to shield you as much as possible because he knows it’s very much out of your comfort zone.
“You okay, baby?” He asked.
“Yeah, barely..”
“Just hold on tight to me, we’re almost there, okay?” He assured you squeezing your hand.
Or how while you're walking down the sidewalk, he moves you to the other side so that he's closer to the road.
“So anyway, I told her that it's not a problem, she just needs to let me know about such things earlier so that I can organize myself.” You rambled to him about work on your evening run on the streets of Monaco.
Except on your way back to the apartment you didn't run anymore because you were too tired and wanted to tell him what happened at work earlier today.
“Yeah, you did the right thing. You shouldn’t keep quiet about such things.”
“I mean I have a life outside of work too, you know?” You sighed.
“You know you don’t have to work, baby..” Lando said sliding his hand around you waist and almost imperceptibly moving you to the other side away from the road.
“Lan, don’t even start with that again. We already had that conversation.”
He kept his hand on your lower back for a while before putting his arm around your shoulder and pulling you to him.
“Or I can do something for you to go on a maternity leave..” He smirked making you burst out laughing.
Or the way he constantly holds your hand even when he’s talking to somebody and when you try to sneak out of his grip he almost instantly grips you tighter as if you’re going to run away. Or when fans ask him for an autograph, and instead of letting go of your hand, he just switches it from his right to left because he wants you close to him all the time.
Or when he has you underneath him while he’s thrusting into you. When he’s so close he lets you know he’s about to come whispering into your ear.
“Oh yes, yes, Lan, uhh” You close your eyes, your voice coming out in broken moans as he keeps knocking the air out of you.
“Fuck baby, I’m gonna cum” He stuttered whispering before spilling his hot load inside you. He was gasping for air, tingles ran through his body as he buried hos head in your neck riding out his orgasm.
He often tells you “You’re gonna make me cum” as well wanting to remind you that no one can except for you. And you love the way he becomes so vulnerable after he cums.
You could have the dirtiest sex ever the one where he’s spitting into your mouth, choking you, making you gag around him, spanking you and pounding into you like there’s no tomorrow, but once both of you finish he just wants to take care od you and make sure he didn’t take it too far.
“Did I hurt you?” He asks looking down at you and moving your hair out of your face.
“I’m fine, don’t worry” You smiled. “I loved it”
“I love you so much” He whispers spreading small soft kisses all over the side of your neck.
Or when you're in the paddock together and you're both giving interviews at the same time, you're standing a little further away from him but close enough for him to hear what the reporters are questioning you. He doesn't know that you notice how he can't concentrate on the questions they're asking him because he keeps turning his head towards your direction keeping his eyes on you to make sure they're not making you feel uncomfortable. So when the reporter asks him something he just keeps saying "sorry, can you repeat that?"
Or the way that when you're going to some kind of event or even just going out, and you're wearing a short dress or some other kind of risky outfit, he opens the car door for you and stands in front to shield you from the paparazzi until you fix your dress and are ready to step out of the car.
Or the way he always comes to apologize first when you have an argument. Neither of you can stand going to bed fighting, it's not natural for you. It doesn't matter if it's your fault or his, he's always the one who comes first and says "let's not do this".
You weren't even sure how the argument came about, but you found yourself yelling at each other for some stupid reason. You were tired and annoyed because he wasn't listening to what you were saying, he was still stressed from losing the race and you just went off on each other.
He let it take an hour for you both to calm down and give each other some space, but he didn't last much longer than that before he came into the room where you were lying on your shared bed reading a book in the dim light.
He sat next to you on the bed, and you ignored him, not taking your eyes off the book. He then gently took the book from your hands and moved even closer to you taking your cheeks between his palms.
"Let's not do this, okay? I feel bad for yelling and I'm sorry about that." He says caressing your cheek with his thumb. "I don't like when we're fighting and when we can't talk things out."
You remain silent for a few seconds to swallow the tears that have gathered in your eyes. "I don't like it either. I overreacted and I'm sorry too." Your voice cracked and the tears started to roll down your cheeks.
"Baby, hey, there's no reason to cry." He said pulling you to him and kissing the side of your head.
"Sorry, I just feel so bad right now because I know you still feel bad about the race and I feel like I didn't give you enough support and comfort but I just took it out on you for nothing."
"It's okay, baby, being with you now is the only comfort I need."
Or that one time when Lando met a little fan in the paddock who asked him about you.
"Is that your girlfriend?" The little boy asked pointing his finger towards you. You weren't with them but talking to some other fan further away from the two of them.
Lando looked in the direction the boy was pointing and nodded. "Yeah, that's y/n, my girlfriend." He said and the little boy giggled. "What?" Lando chuckled.
"She's pretty." The boy said and Lando couldn't hide his ear-to-ear grin.
He looked towards you again and said "I know, right? The prettiest."
Or the way he kisses you on the cheek. There's something about the way he does it. It just feels so special when he comes up from behind you, wraps his arms around you, pulls you to his chest and presses his lips to your cheek. Or when you're watching TV on the couch and you're lying between his legs leaning against him and every now and then he leans his head down to leave a soft kiss on your cheek.
Lando knows that you don't like too much PDA, especially in front of your friends. You're not a fan of kissing in front of them and Lando respects that, but still manages to steal a kiss on the cheek even in front of them.
Or the way when both of your are in the kitchen and you're trying to reach something from the top shelf and he does it for you before you even get to ask him to.
Or the way he keeps snapping pictures of you when you're not looking.
Or the way he keeps a funny picture of you as his wallpaper.
Or the way he looks at you as you happily jump and sing along when he surprises you by taking you to your favorite concert. He is so fulfilled when you are happy, and that is exactly all he needs, you being happy.
Or the way he talks about you in interviews.
"I live a pretty fast-paced life and I tend to put myself under a lot of pressure. Then there's the pressure of being constantly in the public eye as well. Always on the move, training a lot, it often gets to a point where it just becomes too much, you know? It tends to be very overwhelming and exhausting, but all of that disappears the second I come home to her. She makes all of my worries go away and reminds me of what's really important in life. She always puts me back on track. I couldn't do it without her."
All those little things that he does are anything but little to you.
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wcters · 18 days ago
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𝗦𝗟𝗨𝗧!
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pairing: oscar piastri x fem!singer!reader
summary: your boyfriends fans don’t like you very much, even before the relationship is confirmed
warnings: swearing (obviously), slut shaming, hate, established relationship, sexual innuendos (the songs ig?) | Faceclaims is nessa barrett, this is to my girl nessa cause i love her and she deserves no hate 🤍 anyway it’s a little late but go stream AFTERCARE ⭐️
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yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, user2, and 210,048 others
yourusername if you stream passenger princess ur hot 🫀🫀
view all 222 comments
user1 on my knees
user2 who is she and why is oscar here??
user3 oscar don’t associate with her 🤢
user4 streaming rn 💋
user5 she’s such a slut
user6 oscar don’t fall for her she’s a whore
y/nsource
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liked by user1, user3, and 56,035 others
y/nsource y/n at her latest concert in melbourne, australia!
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user1 MOMMY
user2 she shouldn’t be wearing that 😒
user3 did she play passenger princess?
↳ y/nsource she did!
user4 this is the girl oscar has been around?? 💀
user5 someone tell her to cover up
yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, user1, and 108,964 others
yourusername australia you were amazing xx
view all 195 comments
user1 i liked lily better
user2 is it a coincidence that she releases passenger princess while she’s in australia, the place where oscar, an f1 driver, is from??
↳ user3 fbi’s calling 📞
user4 get out of australia and leave oscar alone 🤢🤢
user5 you were so good!!! loved seeing you
↳ yourusername 😚
user6 you need to eat some food
f1gossip
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liked by user1, user3, and 128,893 others
f1gossip oscar piastri seen with singer y/n y/l/n in melbourne, australia, after her show during her ongoing tour.
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user1 dude does not deserve to be with someone as nasty as her
user2 oscar get away!!!!
user3 stop hating on my girl 😭😭
user4 she looks gross
user5 my girl looks hot 🥵
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yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, user1, and 285,023 others
yourusername my album AFTERCARE is out now !!!!! i’m overwhelmed with pride and so many other emotions. thank you to everyone who worked with me on this album, i cannot thank you enough.
and to that one special person, you know who you are, thank you for your unwavering support for me and for believing in me, believing in myself. love you xoxo
view all 234 comments
user1 haters kicking themselves rn
user2 all of her songs are so sexual…
user3 STARGIRL ⭐️⭐️
oscarpiastri 🤍
user4 NO OSCAR
user5 no skip album 🖤
oscarpiastri
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liked by yourusername, landonorris, and 721,624 others
oscarpiastri to my passenger princess ❤️ no one else i’d rather be with
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yourusername i can’t thank you enough o xx
user1 okay they’re cute
user2 my girl and her boy
user3 i’m happy for him if he’s happy
user4 Y’ALL SWITCHED UP SO FAST
landonorris very cute you two
user5 still think she’s not good for him
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unknownmads · 1 year ago
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PRISON TOJII (he’s so addictive🤭) if he’s so bad then why does he look so good? like that’s literally my baby daddy y’all✊🏼😍 i wrote this kinda quick sorry i’ve been so busy y’all
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“hey doll it’s good to finally meet you.”
the words rang through your ears having this be the first time you heard his voice, it was deep and rough his ton was teasing you quietly.
Prison Toji who’s eyes track as you reach into your bag grabbing a small notebook and pen. Opening the notebook revealed a page already full of questions you were waiting to ask him. oh how cute you are thinking about him so much just so excited. he’s pulled out of his trance when you finally speak.
“hi toji, it’s great to finally meet you too” your voice soft at first from your original anxiety about the situation. i mean your just here to meet him for your class nothing more. right? you wouldn’t be here because you love reading his letters telling you how pretty you are. how he wished he could take you out properly. Shamelessly telling you how hard he got to your pictures, but he was just flirting he’s a man in a prison it’s what happens.
Prison toji who finally speaks next the seconds feeling like eternity for him. He doesn’t want to have to sit across a table from you he wants you in his lap sitting pretty just how you are now.
“That’s a lot of writing in your lil notebook doll, you been thinkin of me?” this time his tone laced with teasing and smirk displayed on his lips. it draws attention to his scar, you had never asked about it not wanting to push things you shouldn’t, but you can’t help but ask anyways.
“where’d you get that scar?” pointing to your own lip as you looked up at him. a small chuckle escapes him surprised at your bluntness.
“well you’re quick to the questions today. you wanna get a closer look at it?” the gawking look one your face giving you away. with a quick nod you were leaning across the table to get a closer look as he did the same to help you.
Prison Toji who stops you with an almost surprised grunt when your hand reaches up to touch his lip where the scar is
“shit sorry” quietly escapes you as you looked away for a second toji takes this as an opportunity
“you’re okay sweetheart just gonna get us in some trouble if you do that.” his lips next to your ear as his breath brushing against your ear “can’t control myself around such a pretty thing like you.”
Prison Toji whose pants grow so much tighter when he sees how flustered you get from such a simple comment. You turn back to face him, his eyes instantly meeting yours challenging you telling you to do it, see how far it goes, see how bad he possibly is, and just like a moth to a flame you do just that. your hand grazing where his scar is going to cup his face, it was all so fast you could barely process it. he forced himself forward slamming his lips to yours. shock took you first then you eased into the kiss and began kissing back. and then you remembered HES A PRISONER AND THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE FOR SCHOOL.
Prison toji whose ready to snap his cuffs when you pull away. leaning into you as much as he could almost whining when your lips part from his. he sees you shocked and guilt ridden with your finger touching your lips
“whats wrong doll didn’t like it? give me another chance to try again” his body fully leaning to you practically half way over the table.
“im sorry we shouldn’t hav- it wasn’t bad- just we can’t Toji.” your thoughts swirling the world is spinning. Could you get kick out of school? what if someone saw? are there cameras in here? why do i still want to? it’s wrong.
“It’s fine sweetheart no one will know, just you and me i know you want more from the look on your face and the way your sqeezin your thighs. don’t even try to deny it.”
Caught. like a fly in a trap, he’s got you.
Prison toji whose cock jumps when you slide out of your seat and approach him looking to make sure the guards weren’t watching. unknowing to the fact that toji already blackmailed both of them to let him have all the privacy he needed with you. the look in your eyes as you approached was pure lust and need for him.
“your sure we’ll be fine right?” you say as you lean down towards him
“im positive doll i made sure of it.”
Prison Toji who finally snaps his cuffs unable to take anymore. grabbing your hips and pulling you into his lap his face clashing with your the kiss is sloppy and full of need. a small sound escaping as he deepens the kiss.
“i’ve been dreaming of this.”
TAGS: @altgojo @nanmiik @kouyoumarryme @imaslothandsowhat @dragonmaiden79 @sircatchungus
SOME OF YALL DIDNT SHOW UP WHEN I SEARCHED IM SO SORRY😭
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mywritersmind · 2 months ago
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Fewtrell reader is staying over at Maxs and hes out and Lando comes over and asks “is he home?” and she offers to let him in and wait and the tension is HIGHHH (hes her childhood crush) and you can be creative from here. 🫣
FUCK WITH MY HEAD - LN4
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listen up : banter banter banter!! mentions of sex. ty for the request this like vibe is always in my mind (flirty bantery brothers best friend)
word count : 1061
⋆。‧˚⋆
I’m not even dressed yet, but the consistent knowing and ringing of the doorbell is driving me mad, “Whoever you are, you better have a good reason!” I yell at the unknown person as I yank open the door, only a towel wrapped around me. “Of course it’s you.”
“Wow, not even a hello? And I thought we were friends.” Lando Norris stands in front of me, holding his chest like I've hurt his heart. His eyes check out my towel situation before asking, “Your brother home?”
I practically groan in his face, walking away from the door, “You couldn’t have texted him!? He’s gone for another hour.” I say as I slam the door of the guest bedroom closed so I can change in peace.
I hear the front door shut, “Someone’s in a good mood today.” I mock him only for myself to see as I pull on white shorts and an oversized t-shirt.
I walk back out, breathing deeply and reminding myself that he can’t get to me if I don’t let him, “You’re sort of ruining my only time alone this week.” I’m visiting my brother and as much as I love the guy, he’s fucking obnoxious to live with.
“Had to listen to P and Max go at it, huh?” He leans over the counter, taking a crisp from my bowl.
I make a disgusted face at him, “You’re disgusting and you know for a fact I would be gone if that happened.”
“Wish I was spared from their sex life.” I roll my eyes and pour myself some water, “So… How’s your trip been?”
Small talk? Seriously weird coming from Lando.
“Why are you here anyways?” I don’t answer his question, he stands and joins me at my side, “You know that phone you have? It actually can message someone so you don’t randomly show up to their house!” I smile and blink at him.
He takes another crisp, “But then I wouldn’t be getting this lovely time with you.” I shake my head as I sip my water, pretending not to notice Lando’s eyes roam my body.
It’s a weird feeling to look back at your childhood crush in general; but when your childhood crush is your best friend's brother, famous, rich, and ridiculously attractive, it’s even worse.
Lando Norris was the object of my desire at thirteen and clearly I was onto something. He's dressed in a black shirt and jeans, sporting sneakers and a singular ring on his middle finger.
Still, like every historically accurate childhood crush, Lando never showed any interest. Until we hit our 20s and Lando learned how to flirt.
I don’t see him often, we would run into each other during breaks or holidays. I watch quadrant videos while I do my makeup or races while I pick out an outfit, but Lando hasn’t been this close to me in a while.
The last time we were like this was the beginning of last year. Like I said, we see each other for some holidays. I happened to be invited to his and Max’s new year’s party.
I also happened to be Lando’s new year's kiss. Maybe a bit more, but a lady never tells.
I fake sweetness, twirling my hair, “I’m honored! Lando Norris likes,” My voice goes dry and I walk away from him, “ruining my me time!”
I hear him chuckle as I sit on the couch with my food and phone, “You get sassier everytime I see you.”
I bite into my food, “As I should.”
“And hotter.” I’m paused with my food halfway in my mouth. What the fuck.
I take a breath, not daring to look back, “You shouldn’t say shit like that.”
“Why? I know you like it.” how is his voice attractive?
I turn around, he’s got a shit eating grin on his face, leaning back against the counter. “Max.” I say simply.
“Last time I checked,” He pushes off the counter, walking to the couch and looking down at me, “Max isn’t here.”
“You’re getting far too optimistic.” I look up at him, “Fame going to your head?”
“No I think it’s just you���” His gaze stays fixed on me, “In my head, I mean.” He does this shit too often. Gets in my head while boosting his confidence. I blush and he smirks, it’s a sick cycle that I can’t help but love.
His eyes are glued to mine, I narrow them, trying to figure out his aim here.
“Get in line.” I roll my eyes and turn back to my food and open my phone. I see him bite back a smile, jumping over the couch and laying face up.
He tilts his head back at me while I text my friend, “So… Uni. How many boyfriends have you got?”
I don’t look at him, “I’m currently dating my textbooks. Who has the time?”
“Alright, how many fuck buddies you got?” I eye him, all cute and upside down.
I put my phone down, “You really wanna know the truth?”
“Are my feelings gonna get hurt?”
I look away and he sits up, looking at me in that way I hate so much. It’s not even been twenty minutes and he’s already fucking with my head.
He scoots closer to me and I push my hand over his face to get him away, “You’re ridiculous. You know exactly what you’re doing.”
He doesn’t look away, he never seems to have an issue with eye contact when it comes to me, “What am I doing?” His tone is egging me on, “Go on. Tell me.”
I shake my head, “You’ve got that look in your eye… Like how you looked at me during new years.” The corner of his mouth lifts at the memory.
“Is that a bad thing?”
I sigh, what am I supposed to do? We never talked about it. Max could never know. And as attracted to him as I am, It will never happen again.
I tilt my head a bit, “What are you gonna Lando? Fuck me on my brothers couch?” I catch the slight blush on his cheeks, how his eyes flicker down.
Then he looks back up at me, but not meeting my eyes, his smile grows, “Seems like a pretty appealing offer right now.”
I groan and stand up, “I’m resuming my me time, try not to break anything.”
“You’re not slick, darling! Think of me when you touch yourself.” He blows me a kiss, I reply with my middle finger.
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pholla-jm · 9 months ago
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Heir
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IMAGINE: HEIR ~ SUKUNA X WIFE!READER GENRE: FLUFF cw: sukuna is a bit ooc. fem!reader. not proof read. set in the heian era. true form sukuna. ***************
If someone were to tell Sukuna that in some years that he would have a wife, he would laugh at them… and then kill them. 
But here he was, thinking about how his beautiful wife looked with a small bump on her tummy. It’s all he could think about really. Ever since he found out his wife is pregnant, his view of the world changed. 
Sure, he still thinks that humans were lowly disgusting vile, but the world seemed like a better place with you and his future child in it. 
His every day activities seemed a little less fun now, and all he thought about was getting back home to his wife. 
After a day full of people worshiping him and some killing, he made his way back to his castle. Where his wife should be patiently waiting for him. 
******** 
“What do you think you’re doing?” You hear the deep voice of your husband call out causing you to jump a little. 
He had found you in a different room. It was bare at first, but you were starting to add things to the room. 
You were working on a traditional crib for the baby, having different silks laid out in front of you to choose. 
It was a bit early to start getting ready for the baby, but you were too excited.
You turn to look at him. He towered over you, with his four arms crossed as he looked at you with a disappointed look. 
“I just want to make sure that the baby’s room is going to be perfect.” You say turning back to the silks. 
Sukuna hums, sitting down next to you while observing the objects in front of you. 
“How long have you been doing this?” You shrug, “not that long.” 
“You could always have the servants do this, you know? You shouldn’t be working so hard.” 
“Yeah, I know. I just feel like if I do this myself, it feels more special.” 
Sukuna breathes out a happy breath, leaning his chin on one of his fists. He knew that you would make a great mother. Someone that is nurturing, and he knows that his future son will be loved and taken care of. 
“Still, you should be taking care of yourself. It’s important that you and our son are completely healthy.” 
You perk up hearing the word ‘son’. “Son? It’s a bit too early to know the gender.” 
Sukuna just smirks, eyeing you up and down. “Trust me, I know it’s going to be a boy.” You laugh, “oh yeah? How so?”
He points at your belly, “It’s lower. A low stomach means it’s going to be a boy.” 
Your eyes widen and you look away from him in disbelief. “Where did you even hear that? I didn’t know you believed in old wives tales anyway.” 
“It’s not an old wives tale if it’s the current talk.” “The current talk? What, are you gossiping with the local ladies now?” You laugh at the idea of Sukuna gossiping causing him to frown. “Whatever woman. What they say is true.” “Okay, we’ll see.” 
"I don't want you working on this room by yourself anymore. I have to be here to help you, okay?" You nod your head, a bit happy that Sukuna came up with a quick compromise. "Sound good to me. You can do all the heavy lifting."
Sukuna nods, then points at one of the silks that are laid out in front of you. It was a darker colored one, something that you knew he would like. “This one. It’ll be great for our son.” 
You decide not to comment on the son thing again. With a smile, you pick it out and put it to the side.
Pushing your hands on the ground, you start to get up from the ground. “What are you doing?” “I have to use the bathroom.” You say. However, Sukuna gets up faster than you. He gently picks you up, carrying you bridal style. “I can walk by myself.” You tell him with a small smile. 
You appreciate that Sukuna doted on you like this, but you don’t know how long you would be able to babied like this. 
“When I’m around, you’re not doing a single thing. You understand?” 
With a content sigh, you relax in his arms. Head resting on his shoulder, hearing the faint sound of his heartbeat.
“Yes, my beloved, I understand.”
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hazbinlove · 3 months ago
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Platonic Yandere Batfam x demigod reader x Yandere Percy Jackson
Chapter One
Walking around the manor wasn’t always good. It was quiet…too quiet like everything stilled. It always felt like I didn’t belong, like I shouldn’t have been there in the first place. Walking down the hall of the quiet manor I come across a bedroom. The silver worn out plaque showed $@&€ name in worn out lettering. ‘Ah who is $@&€ again? Probably not important’ I thought to myself before continuing down the hallway of old oak. Stepping down the dark oak stairs carefully I walked into the kitchen only to see a old man there. ‘Who is this again? Meh doesn’t matter. Why am I back in this place again? Where is this place at anyways and why is it important to me?’ I thought to myself again with a small shrug.
“Good evening master @&$@. How is everything?” A calming voice asked snapping me out of my train of thoughts before looking at the man only giving him a nod before walking back upstairs to my room. Walking into the small room too small for a growing person I flopped down onto my old bed with a huff closing my eyes as the world around me went dark. Only to be startled awake by banging.
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Waking up to loud banging wasn’t on my morning to-do list but oh here we are no? Groaning I get up as slide out of bed before quickly tossing in some sweatpants and walking towards the door of my cabin while trying to tame the birds nest of my hair.
“Alright alright I’m coming! Geez.” I yelled out annoyed before opening the door. “Ah good morning Hanna what seems to be the trouble?” I asked the blond girl in front if me. Hanna is one of Apollo’s kids and was always cheerful. She was small a few inches shorter than I and had brown eyes and a little tan but she is well strong enough to handle her own. Her brown eyes always seemed to look bright no matter the hardships sent her way…oh how I envy that but I guess that’s why she’s Apollo’s kid huh?
“Ah you won’t believe it! Hunter asked me out today!” Hanna’s squealed out causing me to reel my head back a bit before rubbing my ringing ears. Although she’s Apollo’s kid her voice is high pitched but cheerful. Kinda like Pinky pie from my little pony.
“Oh hun that’s great! It seems like Cupid and Aphrodite were listen to you’re prayers no?” I said while leaning against the doorframe crossing my arms with a small smile. Hunter is one of Ares kids but thankfully is pretty chill most of the time.
“Oh indeed! He’s just so handsome with his blond hair and green eyes. And his large hands that can-“ Hanna said only to just as quickly be cut off by a somewhat flustered demigod.
“Alright alright let’s not go down that kind of path now hun. It’s good that you love him but sometimes let’s not over share alright? And I’ll admit he’s a handsome fella.” I said cutting her off quickly scratching my flustered cheeks with a small laugh. I loved Hanna I really do but sometimes she can be a bit…what’s the word. An over-sharer? Lust driven? Sometimes I forget she’s Apollo’s kid and not Aphrodite’s. She definitely has the looks to be an Aphrodite kid.
“Aw come on!! It’s not that bad but alright. I came to also tell y’a that breakfast is almost done.” Hanna said with a small pout before smiling.
“Alright thank you hun. I’ll be right out.” I said with a small nod of gratitude what hung as the hyper girl bounced off towards the other campers. ‘I swear this girl never runs out of energy.’ I thought to myself with a small amused chuckle and closed my cabin door.
Yawning I walked back into my bedroom and looked around. The walls were painted in deep shades of indigo, and charcoal creating a sense of enveloping darkness. Looking over at the large window above my bed the dark purple curtains pushed to the side as the sun was barely up.
‘Hm must be 5 or 6 in the morning.’ I thought to myself before looking around again. The intricate metalwork in the shape of crescent moons, delicate chandeliers resembling constellations, or tapestries depicting nocturnal creatures like owls, bats, or wolves.
‘I’ll have to thank Leo for making those for me. Maybe get him some more metal to work with?’ I thought with a small nod before fixing my bed. Grabbing the luxurious, velvety bedding with midnight tones I pulled the sheets and blankets over the bed. Grabbing the Plush throw pillows I put them back in place before smoothing out the blanket. With a nod I bent down to fix the soft rug with jewel-toned hues. Nodding in contempt I looked over at the shelves, ancient tomes on astronomy, mythology, and the occult, along with small trinkets and curiosities collected from the child's nighttime wanderings. Looking over at the desk or work table taking note of the old grimoire sitting there. Walking over I quickly closed the eons old book. With a nod of approval I walked off towards the bathroom to get ready for the day.
Walking into the softly lit bathroom I leaned against the deep black stone sink that could possibly pass off as obsidian. Looking into the large mirror ornate mirror framed in silver, with designs of the moon phases or intricate constellations. Standing taking in my disheveled appearance before trying to smooth out my hair while staring at the gray streak in my hair. Running my hands across the scar on my cheek with distain.
‘God I’ve always hated this scar. It’s so…ugly and weird looking…guess that’s what happens when you fight off harpies.’ I thought to myself before sighing and grabbing a brush to brush out my hair.(if you’re a man or have short hair ignore this!) After that I slip off my black silk pajama shirt before looking away from the mirror not wanting to look at the scars of past battles. With quick succession I walked over to the black stone bathtub that looked similar to the sink before turning on the water. Patting the hot water fog up the mirror and bathroom while I quickly take off the rest of my garments and tossing them into the dirty hamper for later.
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Getting out of the shower I quickly grab a towel to cover myself before opening the bathroom door letting the steam out of the confined space of the bathroom. Walking back into my room I walk over to the large oak closet before opening the doors. Looking at the array of clothing I grab one of the orange camp shirts and setting it on the bed before grabbing a pair of black jeans with holes.
‘I should probably get a new pair of jeans soon. Too many holes could be dangerous and could get caught on something. I wonder is Chiron would let me stop by the store if I have a quest today?’ I though with a nod before setting the jeans on my bed with the shirt. Walking towards the dresser I grab the necessary garments before also placing them on the bed.
‘I wonder what’s for breakfast? Pancakes? Waffles? French toast? Sausage? Hash browns? Waffles with sausages and eggs sounds delightful.’ I thought to myself while slipping my jeans and shirt on. Walking back into the bathroom I quickly look in the mirror and smoothed out my shirt a bit before nodding in acceptance.
‘Looks nice. This shall do for the day ahead.’ I thought again before turning on the sink Fossett and grabbing my toothbrush and toothpaste.
‘I wonder what Chiron will have us do today? Probably send some of us on quests and what not. I know for a fact that some Ares kids are gonna cause some trouble. Wonder what if I have a quest.’ I though while brushing my teeth and rinsing the toothbrush and spat out some extra toothpaste before rinsing my mouth.
Walking out of the bathroom I quickly slip on some socks before sipping on my old beat up convers. Getting up off the bed I grab my phone and headphones before heading out of my cabin. Rubbing my eyes from the sleep I walk off down the pathway before finally coming across cabin three Poseidon’s cabin.
“Percy you up? It’s almost time for breakfast!” I said loudly not wanting to startle the boy while knocking on his cabin door. Receiving no answer I huff before gently opening the door and walking into the cabin. It smelled like the fresh sea and musk pretty fitting for the son of the sea god. Looking around before walking towards the bunk room only to find said demigod still sleeping in bed.
“Percy dude it’s time to get up now. It’s almost breakfast.” *I said turning on his lamp and gently hedging the boys shoulder, but only receiving a grain in protest.
“Come on now Percy. Just think of the adventures that are lined up for you.” I said while leaning over him looking into his drowsy sea green eyes.
“Good morning sunshine. The day is early now get up before I get Annabeth.” I said a little amused before walking off as he sat up and rubbed his face. Percy is a handsome demigod. He is every girls first crush. Given that having messy, jet-black naturally tousled, wavy thick hair of his. His body is what a lot of girls like about him. His athletic build, though not overly muscular. He’s lean and toned. He has the kind of physique that comes from constant activity rather than hours in a gym. Think of someone who runs, swims, and spars regularly. Some girls like him because of his sun-kissed, slightly tanned skin, with a few freckles or marks from scrapes or cuts. But overall don’t let his appearance fool you Percy is a force to be reckoned with. He’s fought many battles and won. Fought many monsters and won. Overall Percy is deserving of the total of strongest demigod.
“What time is it?” Percy asked his voice deep and groggy from waking up as he swung his legs off the side of his bed.
“Currently about 5:40 in the morning. Breakfast is at 6:20 so come up you go!” I said while grabbing a camp shirt and jeans from his closet and folding them neatly before placing them on his dresser.
“Ugh it’s too early! I wanna sleep more!” Percy whined behind me causing me to roll my eyes a little.
“Sorry bud but you’ve gotta get up now. Chiron would get upset if you’re not up by then.” I said and walked past him making sure to ruffle his hair hoping to wake up up more as he leaned into the touch.
“I don’t wanna but I’ll get up. Only if you stay and wait for me?” Percy said looking up at me with puppy eyes wanting me to stay.
“Alright I’ll stay but hurry up.” I said with a sigh as he got up and quickly hugged me before running off towards his shower. ‘I swear he’s gonna be the death of me.’ I thought to myself before sitting down on his bed and taking out my phone.
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A few minutes have past since Percy got into the shower leaving me sitting there on his bed playing on my phone. I was swinging my legs a little waiting for Percy to get out of the shower. After a few more minutes I could hear the shower turn off and the door open. Keeping my back to the door waiting for Percy to get dressed.
“You can turn around now {Name}” Percy said from behind me as I turned around to face him.
“How was you’re showed bud?” I asked and got up from his bed to dry his hair.
“It was good. How was you’re shower? You’re hair is still wet.” He asked reaching up gently grabbing the ends of my hair.(<ignore this if you have short hair!)
“It was the same but overall alright. Now sir and let me dry you’re hair.” I said as I sat back down on the edge of his bed and he sat on the floor in between my legs. Gently placing the towel on his head. I gently massaged his head drying his hair as he leaned back against me a little.
“Relaxed?” I asked a little amused as he just hums. Chuckling I continue drying his hair before tapping his shoulder for him to get up. As he got up I walked into his bathroom and hung the towel up to dry before leaving his bathroom. Looking over at Percy as he puts his shoes on I quickly grab my phone before waiting by the door for him so we could make our way towards breakfast.
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Walking out towards breakfast wasn’t as quiet as I hoped. Percy here as much as I love him and he’s my best friend he shouldn’t be this hyper in the morning. Shh don’t tell but I’m barely paying attention to what he’s saying. Listening to him talking I just nod along here and there. After a few more minutes of walking finally Percy and I came across the dinning area of camp. Listening to all the other campers talking was always loud but welcoming. It felt like home honestly I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. Percy, Annabeth and the others are my friends…there my family.
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Life at Camp half-blood was both good and bad. We all have trauma and have seen some things. Things normal humans wouldn’t understand. Things humans would fear. We demigods fight said monsters and mythological beasts. All to protect humans from what they wouldn’t understand. Overall coming to camp was the best decision I’ve ever done. I thank Apollo and Artemis for finding me and bringing me here all those years ago, but I wonder why they helped me all those years ago.
“{Name!}”
A sudden shout of my name interrupted my thoughts. Lookin go over I notice Percy looking worried holding onto my shoulder.
“Sorry I’m alright just lost in thoughts is all.” I said gently patting his hand only for him to squeeze my shoulder a little bit. It made me feel a little uncomfortable with how tight it was.
“Are you sure? I’m always here if you need me.” Percy said his eyes darkened a little bit his hold on my shoulder still uncomfortable.
“Yeah I’m alright. Let’s just get some food.” I said and quickly walking off to get some breakfast. Unaware of the dark look that flashed across his face.
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Getting in line for food you’re waiting listening to Hanna blabber on about Hunter as Percy walks up being you and Hanna. Jumping slightly as he grabs you’re hand and intertwine his fingers with yours. Feeling a little uncomfortable with his tight grip you try to move you’re hand away only for Percy’s grip to get tighter. Kinda like a constricting snake with it’s prey. Getting slightly nervous due to his strong grip you quickly pinch his side as let go of his hand before wiping you’re hand off. Going back to listening to Hanna talk you keep you’re hands in front of you completely missing the dark look that flashes in Percy’s eyes.
After grabbing a plate of waffles and sausage you, Hanna, and Percy walk over to the table housing Annabeth and Piper and a few others before sitting down. Hanna sitting down next to Hunter while you sit across from them. Setting you’re plate down and sitting on the bench Percy immediately sits down next to you before he engaged in a conversation with Annabeth and Piper.
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After finishing you’re food you listen to the loud onslaught of talking going on around you. Picking up on a few things here and there as conversations take place. Uninterested you slowly allow yourself to block out the noise and go back into you’re thought’s, but before you could the breakfast gets interrupted by Chiron dismissing everyone to do there own thing around camp.
“{Name!} and Percy!”
A sudden shout of yours and Percy’s name startled both of you. You, Percy and the table look over at Chiron as he waved you and Percy over to him. With a sigh you get up to walk over only for Percy to excitedly grab you’re hand and drag you over to Chiron.
Chiron was a centaur or well an immortal centaur, he’s the son of Kronos and the Oceanid Philyra, and also a famed trainer of heroes. Chiron is also the activities director at Camp Half-Blood. He’s like a father not only to you but to Annabeth as well. He raised you both into the strong warriors you are today. Chiron’s eyes and hair are brown like the Grand Canyon. You feel as thought Chiron is not a true centaur, as centaurs are quite notorious for being overly indulgent drinkers and carousers, giving into violence when intoxicated, wild, lusty, and overall generally uncultured delinquents. Chiron, by a large contrast, was very intelligent, civilized, and kind. You’re also pretty positive that true centaurs are born of sun and cloud and are not immortal. You’re also like…90% sure Chiron got his immortality from the gods.
“Yes Chiron? Good morning!” Percy said still as hyper as ever. As he swings you’re linked hands.
“Yes good morning Percy and good morning {Name}. I actually have a quest for the two of you.” Chiron said as Percy nods excitedly at the prospect of going on a quest. You really didn’t mind going on quests but you personally liked doing quests alone.
“Alright so here’s the quest.”
End~
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© - all rights reserved. Please avoid plagiarism, or copying anything I write. Some things I write may be shitty!
@erikasurfer @maicenitas @plsfckmedxddy
If you wanna be tagged lmk and I’ll tag y’all! Also if I made any mistakes lmk and I’ll fix them!!
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natalievoncatte · 28 days ago
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Lena didn’t mean to overhear. She was at the bar to grab a drink, and was taking it when she noticed Kara and Alex conspiring intently together. It was a private moment, a sister moment, so she shouldn’t have listened, and yet she did anyway.
“I’m sorry, Alex. I don’t want to ruin your wedding.”
“You’re not, kiddo. This isn’t the wedding, this is just a little night out. I’ll be happy if we get through the ceremony without a bridge collapse or an alien invasion or whatever.”
Everyone was having a good time. Kelly was with James, who’d come in from out of town for the ceremony tomorrow. Nia leaned back to Brainy as she made a giggling attempt to hit the dart board. The other guests were milling about, mingling and chatting and getting tipsy.
Lena felt more than a little maudlin, because Kara was hanging with Alex and that left Lena alone in the crowd.
“I’m so happy for you,” Kara was saying, “I just hope I get it myself some day.”
“You’ll find someone, Kara. You’re a beautiful, amazing person- not Supergirl, you.”
Lena pretended not to notice them, nursing her scotch. (A double, neat)
“That’s just it,” Kara choked out. “There is someone, Alex. There already is. She just won’t ever want me like I want her.”
Lena looked up in absolute shock and at the absolutely, perfectly wrong time. Alex’s eyes met hers, her expression as shocked as Lena’s was.
Rushing away from the bar, Lena headed for the pinball machines, not looking back. She downed the rest of her scotch in a coal-hot rush and it only added to the churning in her belly. She swallowed hard and her throat was instantly dry, and she cursed the afterburn of the liquor.
“You heard her.”
Lena wheeled. Alex was standing behind her, a beer in either hand. She handed one to Lena.
“You know what they say about liquor after beer,” said Lena.
“Lena, we both have advanced degrees and we both know that’s bullshit.”
That was good, because Lena downed half the brew in one long pull.
“Jesus,” said Alex. “I was trying to get you to slow down.”
“Yeah, well,” said Lena. “I’m Irish.”
Alex snorted. “You’re deflecting. You heard what she said.”
“Maybe.”
Alex rolled her eyes. “I’ve been through five fucking years of this and I’ve had enough, Lena.”
“Enough of what?”
“Kara’s wrong about your feelings.”
Lena blinked, took another pull. “How do you know she means me?”
Alex looked at her flatly.
“How do I know it’s you? Because she always rescues you. She’s always defended you. She gave you chance after chance and never gave up even when you were at your worst. Kara would die for you. A fifth dimensional imp offered to grant her wish and she didn’t wish for her planet or her parents or to have our dad back. She wished for you. For a second chance.”
“Fifth dimensional what?”
“She reversed time for you, Lena.”
Lena gaped at her.
“What do you mean? She did what?”
“She made me swear never to tell. There was a time when she was too slow, when she was already in the middle of a disaster when you got shot. She’s the only one who remembers that timeline because she fixed it. She flew at superluminal speed and went backwards in time so she could be in two places at once. Apparently a Kryptonian can do that, but she swears it can only be done the one time.”
Lena’s beer was sloshing in the bottle from the shaking of her hands.
“For God’s sake, Lena. I know you’re in love with her. You two had a bad breakup without even dating first. You spent a billion dollars to hang out with her at work. You filled her office with flowers. You let her in, you let her bring you into our family, and you forgave her for doing something really fucked up and you forgave me for pushing her to do it.”
Alex clapped a hand on her shoulder.
“Lena, sack up and go get your girl. She’s at the bar crying into a Shirley Temple because I cut her off. She’s waiting for you.”
Lena stared at her.
“Alex, I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t need to say anything. Go. Get. Her.”
Lena looked at her beer, downed the last of it, and gave Alex a curt nod, marching past her.
Kara was sitting at the bar. She was dressed in skinny jeans and a loose N’Sync t-shirt and leather sandals. She was among friends here and had removed her glasses, her hair in a sloppy ponytail. She looked like she’d rather sulk at home than party.
Lena hopped on the stool next to her.
“Hey.”
“Hi, Lee. Having fun?”
“Not really,” said Lena. She waved the bartender away as he approached to offer her another drink. “I’m kind of down honestly.”
“Weddings always depress me,” said Lena. “Watching other people get all the happiness I’ll never have, basking in their joy for a while. It’s like sitting by the fire in someone else’s house, but eventually you have to go home to your own and it’s empty.”
Kara’s eyes glittered with tears. “Yeah. It does feel like that, doesn’t it?”
Lena rested her hand on Kara’s wrist.
“May I have this dance?”
Kara looked up sharply.
“This isn’t really a dancing kind of place.”
Lena snorted. “I’m a billionaire. I can do what I want.”
She slipped off her stool and offered Kara a hand.
Kelly and Alex had reunited. They were talking animatedly, and Alex pointed at Lena. Suddenly she rushed over to the jukebox as Lena took Kara’s hand and led her to an open space.
The music changes to Wonderful Tonight. Eric Clapton.
Lena was going to kill Alex.
“Huh,” said Kara.
It seemed natural that Kara would lead, being taller and more graceful by far, but Lena put a hand on her hip and rested the other on her shoulder, wondering if Kara could feel her pounding pulse through her palms.
It started with them like middle schoolers, half a foot awkwardly apart, movements jerky, but it quickly changed. Lena didn’t know who bridged that gap first but soon they were pressed body to body, Kara tilted forward to rest her forehead against Lena’s.
Lena went from chastely pressing a guiding hand to Kara’s flank to an arm looped lazily around her hips, hand resting gently against her ass. Her other hand moved from Kara’s shoulder to her neck, thumb grazing Kara’s jawline.
Kara, hesitantly, reciprocated, less dancing with Lena and more swaying with her in a meandering hug. They were so close that Lena’s head swam.
“Do you remember when you first got back from the Phantom Zone?”
“I don’t think I’ll ever forget,” said Kara. “When I came back and I saw you standing there, I could barely take it. You looked like an angel.”
Lena nodded gently, nudging closer to Kara until she could feel the presence of the other woman’s lips without touching.
“You looked like you wanted to kiss me.”
Kara’s entire body went briefly rigid, then relaxed.
“You could have,” Lena whispered. “You could have and I’d have kissed you back. I swear I can think of a dozen times when you were about to kiss me and I wanted it right then, I wanted it so bad.”
Kara choked back a small sob. “I remember the first time I thought about it. It was when Morgan Edge was framing you and you were so upset, you were crying. You were so sad and beautiful and soft and I wanted to kiss you right then. I wanted to make you feel better any way I could.”
“That would have been a great time.”
Kara laughed. “That would have been a good time. Maybe the best time.”
“The second best time is now.”
Lena looked up. They were holding each other now and Lena knew there were eyes on them, that their friends were watching.
Kara didn’t seem to notice or care. There was a fresh sparkle in her eyes, wide and nervous, her lips trembling in a half smile. She didn’t seem to know what to make of what Lena said, perhaps questioning if she’d heard right.
Poor Kara, her Kara, would find any excuse to steal the happiness from her own hands, to martyr herself, to seek penance for a crime that she never committed. Lena knew her guilt, felt in sing in her own soul like a kind of magnetic resonance.
Lena Luthor did not believe in silly things like soulmates or fate or destined lovers.
But she believed in Kara Danvers, and Kara Danvers kissed her. Lena barely registered it at first, so gentle was the brushing of Kara’s soft lips against her own. She gave Kara no chance to retreat into embarrassment or confusion, kissing her back so intensely that there could be no mistaking the intent. When she did, it was like seeing the stars for the first time, and a pleasant warmth pooled low in the cradle of her hips.
Kissing Kara felt like coming home.
They were staring at each other. Lena drank the sight of Kara staring at her, shocked expression full of an elation, a pure excited joy that magnified her stunning beauty a thousandfold until Lena thought she might die of pure love for this woman that she held in her arms. She went in for another kiss and this time, neither hesitated.
Alex’s voice cut through it all. “Hey, you two. Get a room.”
She was by the jukebox, grinning ear to ear despite Kelly’s scowl. Before either of them could react, Alex dropped a coin in the jukebox and played… the fucking Macarena.
“I don’t know whether to murder her or send her a gift basket,” Lena snapped.
Kara curled a finger around Lena’s chin and their eyes locked.
“Maybe we should get a room,” Kara whispered.
Lena swallowed hard.
“What are we waiting for?”
Kara took her hand, and stuck out her tongue at her sister as they left the bar.
395 notes · View notes
shinsources · 2 years ago
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sacred romantic moments
“ don’t go. stay. “
“ but you’re here, so stay. “
“ i don’t want to be alone tonight. “
“ just come over. “
“ let’s be alone together. “
“ i didn’t know where else to go. “
“ i don’t want us to be apart anymore. ever. “
“ i wouldn’t have called you if it wasn’t important. “
“ you can talk to me about anything. you know that, right? “
“ just… be honest with me, do you hate me? “
“ i could never hate you. not really. “
“ you’re my friend, but… sometimes i wish you were more than that. “
“ we’re not just friends. you know that. “
“ i think i’m falling in love with you. “
“ can i hold your hand? ���
“ yeah, you’re in love with me. “
“ just hold me. “
“ things would be so much easier if we were honest with each other. “
“ why can’t you be honest with me? with yourself? “
“ maybe you could stay? just for tonight? “
“ it’s dark outside, and it’s raining. my arms are much safer. “
“ you can’t keep doing this. you can’t keep lying to yourself. “
“ i can’t keep lying to myself, or to you. it’s not fair on either of us. “
“ i think you should kiss me. “
“ kiss me like you mean it. “
“ just kiss me. “
“ you shouldn’t kiss me right now. “
“ look me in the eyes and tell me you love me. “
“ you can’t lie to me, you know. “
“ you know me better than anyone. you always have. “
“ you’re pretty amazing. you know that, right? “
“ you’re just… you’re extraordinary. “
“ you’re good to me, you know. really good. “
“ you’ve made me the happiest i’ve ever been. “
“ i don’t know what i would have done if you weren’t here. “
“ our love can conquer anything. “
“ and for many generations to come, our love story will live on. “
“ i want you to marry me. “
“ if you asked me to marry you tomorrow, i’d say yes. “ “ what about today? “
“ marry me, name. marry me and make me the luckiest [x] in the world. “
“ your kiss could mend a broken heart. “
“ are you going to kiss me again, or do i have to do it myself? “
“ i could cry, that’s how much i love you. “
“ you’re worthy of my love. “
“ truth is that i’m so damn in love with you that i don’t know what to do with myself. “
“ maybe tonight, it’s you and me. “
“ i don’t know what the future holds. all i know is that i hope you’re in it. “
“ could you promise me one thing? “
“ promise me that we’ll be together, no matter what. “
“ it’s you and me, forever. no matter what. “
“ i didn’t want to tell you until i was sure, but… i’m pregnant. “
“ we’re going to be family! “
“ this baby, it’s the best thing that could ever have happened to us. “
“ i can’t believe this, we’re going to be parents! “
“ dance with me? “
“ may i have this dance? “
“ you’re my whole world, you know. “
“ don’t speak, just… kiss me. “
“ you have no idea how long i’ve been wanting to that. “
“ i’ve been wanting to tell you for so long… “
“ so… is this like, a thing now? “
“ i always miss you, even when you’re next to me. “
” i miss you. i miss you so much it hurts. ”
” i don’t want you to miss me. it’s tearing me apart. ”
“ you make me happier. “
“ i love waking up next to you. “
“ my favorite thing is falling asleep next to you. “
“ come cuddle with me. “
“ this is torture, isn’t it? “ “ not in the slightest. “
“ do you love me? “
“ could this be something more? “
“ move in with me. “
“ do you think we should move in together? you spend all your time here anyway. “
“ are you serious? i’ve had a crush on you for as long as i can remember. “
“ i know you’re in love with me. “
“ you’re really cute, you know. “
“ you’re so damn attractive. you know that right? “
“ if anybody were to kiss me, i would want that person to be you. “
“ and right now, i think you should kiss me. “
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penguininahottub · 20 days ago
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This is, by no means, original thought. However, after the release of Beatles ‘64, I just want someone to make a Beatles film that is for us. Forget the mainstream and do what Cynthia said had never happened - people getting the emotion right instead of just the facts. The Beatles story isn’t a success story, it isn’t a rags to riches story, it isn’t an even a story about genius, it’s a story that has the power to change the world and one that will be told for ever. We are living in an era where we get to witness a myth being made and so in tribute to the oral tradition, we need to be the myth-makers. Someone needs to tell the story. I hope it will be Paul. I fear it won’t. Perhaps he can’t or shouldn’t, perhaps he won’t be believed. He definitely won’t be if everyone, including him, keeps recycling the same tropes. We know there’s no new stuff to be created, but there is a new light to be shed on what we know is there. This is beginning to sound a bit like the discovery of the Book of Mormon. No one needs another religion, but we do need is for someone to actually attempt to approach this seismic cultural event with an honest and open perspective.
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Yoko allowed John to believe he was the genius. John’s canonisation (his manufactured image does him no favours) means that we can forget that Paul was the revered one in the 60s. He was the chosen one - in every way. John clocked it at their very first meeting.
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“I half thought to myself, He’s as good as me, I’d been kingpin up to then. Now, I thought, if I take him on, what will happen?”- John
He took a risk, he made his choice and then never again believed in his own ultimate superiority. The story he’d told himself growing up, was that nobody was capable of spotting his genius because they were all below him. Surely a trauma response to being abandoned by his parents. Never could stand to be ignored, forever desperate to be seen and yet incapable of taking off the armour of cruelty. Look at me! Paul was the same, not armour but a wall of charm. Underneath John was soft and Paul is that almost impenetrable wall. They let each other in, and each betrayed the other. Those instincts of self-preservation that John spoke about.
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Anyway, he took the chance on Paul, because he wanted to be somebody and Paul and him together made that a real possibility. Also, Paul was fucking hot and clever and talented. He was also a non-conforming weirdo who made everything look effortless and wouldn’t join John’s gang and wouldn’t let him lead. I wonder if this was Paul knowing, from the first moment of seeing John as was then confirmed by subsequent sightings and (I suspect) recces, strategically carried out to observe John (oh that bus worship carries some significance beyond an appreciation for public transport), that he knew how to handle John. Handle and manage John, in order to make him his very own.
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(Is it him? Does it matter, because Paul has told us he “noticed” John many times, even before the chocolate bar.)
But, all the Paul adulation, especially John’s own uncontrollable, unconditional veneration, got to be too much. He couldn’t keep his jealousy in check. No quantity of material objects, women, money, food, fame soothed the ache for long enough. He thought Yoko, and because I am sure this is what Yoko promised him, was the only person who would always be in awe of him. She wasn’t, and the really tragic part is that Paul was from the jump, he still is and his faith never waivered.
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If only they’d been able to maintain the connection and never lose the ability to read each other’s minds.
They burned too brightly. They loved too hard.
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princessbrunette · 9 months ago
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no thoughts… just this
bunny having a bad day and rafe saying “you’re fine, okay? daddy’s here. m’not going nowhere” :((
also, I’d love to be 🫐 anon if it’s not taken! 🫶🏻
⿻╰��� . ִ ۫ ⁎ .
you’d done the right thing. you’d called rafe — just like he told you to. if you were ever having trouble with anything — you were to call him and he’d handle it, that’s what he’d always drilled into you, and you never knew anything different.
so he wasn’t displeased to find you in tears outside the hair salon. he was mad, just not at you.
they’d overcharged you, pricing you up past what they originally told you on the phone, and when you said you didn’t have that money on you they yelled at you. safe to say, you didn’t take it well. panicked and upset, you call rafe — who shows like a superhero with a black card.
“and — and you tell the manager of this place, that if you overcharge my girl again there’ll be trouble… yeah — this building exists because of cameron development, don’t forget that shit, alright?”
he storms you out of there with a hand on your lower back all the way to the car, where you let the tears run free.
“three hundred dollars my ass. gave them two fifty n’that was me being god damn generous.” he rambles quietly as he buckles himself in, not noticing how upset you were until a few seconds later. “hey, you alright? what’d they even say huh?”
you paw at your damp cheeks, looking away shamefully. “a load of stuff. i could have paid for it— i do have the money it’s just they told me somethin’ different on the phone so i only brought it in cash so then they said—” you mewl and he shakes his head, blinking obviously at you.
“okayokay— hey, you’re not in the wrong here, alright? don’t have to explain shit. you just…” he sighs, picking his words carefully as he scratches at his chin staring into space. “should have told me where you were goin’ today. yeah? i would have given you the money. it wouldn’t have been a problem.”
your lip wobbles as you look down at your hands. “i just wanted to do something myself.” you squeeze your eyes shut forcing two fat tears to roll down your cheeks and he sighs, shuffling as close to you as he can and pulling your torso over the centre console to hug him. “just embarrassed.” you sigh, still sniffling but your body relaxes a little feeling him near.
“well, you have no reason to be— okay? i came and saved you right? like i always do? nothings wrong with that. i look after you. it’s what i do.” he drawls, thumb stroking your back when he feels you nod in acceptance. “you’re fine. daddy’s here.” he adds, just because he knows it’ll ease you into a more relaxed state.
“yeah.” you agree and he pulls you back, before reaching over and buckling you in.
“shouldn’t let them see you cry, bunny girl. alright? your hair looks pretty anyway. don’t need to cry anymore.” he relays in that rich boy nasally tone as he starts the car up, preparing to take you home.
⿻╰🎀 . ִ ۫ ⁎ .
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myownwholewildworld · 3 months ago
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WHEN THE MOON HOWLS ― a javier peña's autumnal oneshot
main masterlist | read on ao3 | part 2 pairing: javier peña x f!reader. summary: you meet javier in a café during your sabbatical. you see the man that no one does ― the one who is broken, defeated, crushed by his time as a DEA agent. so you make it your purpose to shine some light on his life, one pumpkin spice latte at a time. -or- the story of how you two fall head over heels for each other c: a/n: hiya! been wanting to write for javi p for a while, but was afraid to take the plunge because it's been a hot minute since i last watched narcos. anyways, this fic is for @goodwithcheese and @jolapeno's jolabrew + withcheese fall challenge which i found really inspiring, thank you for hosting this sweet challenge! first time taking part in a challenge too, whoop whoop! as always, all interactions welcome, would love to hear your thoughts. take care! <3 x warnings/tags: 18+, mdni (no smut here, but still). post season 3 of narcos, possibly slightly off-canon? idk. fluff, loads of it! angst, comfort. mentions of ptsd, panic attacks and therapy. halloween/autumnal vibes. trip to the pumpkin patch to cheer our sweet javi up. reader's pov only (v unlike me). no use of y/n. no description of reader (moodboard is only for aesthetic purposes). unbeta'd, soz. w/c: 6.8k (this was gonna be a short drabble... smh) divider by @saradika-graphics
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Friday, 18th September 1998
“What can I get for you today, gorgeous?” was your go-to sentence with every client.
Even when your own personal demons stalked you at night, you made your best effort to get out of bed every day and come to work. Working in a café was not in your plans for this year, but a heart-shattering breakup had rocked your world so bad, you needed out.
So, you took a sabbatical from your job in finance, hugged your parents and waved goodbye to your friends. It would only be for one year ― hopefully enough to get your life together and reorganise your priorities.
That was why you moved to Laredo two months ago, to have a fresh start with a blank slate ― where no one knew you and you knew no one. A month into your new life, you realised you needed to do something or otherwise you would go crazy. So you took a waiting job at one of the local cafés. You were just paid the minimum wage, but you had enough savings to live comfortably for a year without any issues.
It was only mid-September ― technically still summer. However, the unusually cold weather made it look otherwise. Fall had appeared sooner this year, and you couldn’t be happier about it. You loved autumn ― its duller hues, the crispy air, the browning leaves, the cozy sweaters, burying yourself under blankets on the couch while channel surfing. It was, by far, your favourite season.
“A pumpkin spice latte, please.” The masculine voice that spoke back to you was plain, deflated ― it lacked… something, but you were not able to pinpoint what exactly.
Your eyes moved from your notebook to the man in front of you, sat at the one of the most isolated tables. A few strands of wavy, brown hair fell across his forehead, the ends caressing the metal frame of the yellow-tinted, aviator sunglasses that shielded his eyes. ‘Brown too,’ you thought. ‘Sad and brown.’
Even if he was not looking at you, you could simply tell. His demeanour, his posture, the way he averted his eyes ― the man spoke of sadness and hurt, of something dark and gut-wrenching you could not even fathom.
And he was alone ― it was obvious he was not waiting on anyone.
“Anything else?” You asked, your throat suddenly dry.
He shook his head no without a word. His hands were placed on top of the table, his fingers intertwined while his thumbs circled each other. It was a restrained yet impatient gesture, as if he could not wait to be left alone.
“Could I interest you in a slice of pumpkin cake? It’s got cream cheese frosting. Shouldn’t say it myself because I baked it, but it’s delicious, I promise.” You tried to tempt him; a soft smile directed at him. “If you don’t like it, it’s on the house.”
The curvature of your lips wavered when his eyes slowly drifted up towards you and locked on yours. They definitely had a sorrowful tint to them ― as if he had seen too much, been witness to too many unspeakable things. His eyes were a window to a crushed soul, that much you could perceive.
His lips formed a flat line as he looked away and through the window to his right.
“Why not then…” His reply was not rude but charged with something unsettling. Something that made you swallow hard.
But you were still smiling back at him. Maybe the guy was having a rough day, a rough week or a rough month. A rough lifetime? Showing him kindness was not going to change his view on the world around him, but if it helped, even a tiny bit, you would smile until the corners of your mouth hurt.
“Alrighty, shouldn’t be long!” You scribbled the command on your notebook, the tip of your tongue unconsciously sticking out between your teeth as you did.
You walked back to behind the counter and when you turned around, you saw the man watching your every move. But as soon as he felt caught, he bowed his head down and looked for something in one of his shirt’s pockets. Soon after that, he lighted a cigarette.
Slightly confused, you faced the coffee maker and looked at the recipe card for the pumpkin spice latte. As you started preparing it, one of your colleagues walked past you.
“Pssst, Alejandra!” You called her in a whisper.
The girl looked around her, unsure if someone had said her name or if it was her imagination playing games.
“Over here”, you waved at her and Alejandra happily trotted towards you.
“Yeah? What’s up? Do you need a hand with that?” She offered her help, as she always did. You were grateful to have such good coworkers in your shift. It was a contrasting experience in comparison to your finance job.
“No, I think I’m okay. Got a question of different nature though,” you ventured pressing your lips together. “The guy over there, sat in the corner…” Alejandra turned her head around to look and stuck her head out, going on her tiptoes and everything. “Hey! Be a bit less obvious, dammit!” You panicked, shaking her forearm as she giggled.
“What about him?” She asked with a cocked brow.
“Who is he? Not seen him before ‘round here.” You tried to sound as casual as possible, but Alejandra’s raised eyebrow told you she was seeing through your bullshit.
“Chucho’s son. Javier.”
“Chucho who?” It seemed like everyone knew everyone in this town, except for you.
“Chucho Peña, he owns a farm on the outskirts of town. That’s his son Javier. He worked for the DEA and has moved back in with his old man a couple of weeks ago. Rumour has it he was fired. Apparently, he was caught doing drugs on the job, can you believe it?” Alejandra didn’t hold back on the gossip. “The same drugs he was confiscating from the narcos, taking them all for himself. Some say he was even selling them back to them and making good profit.”
You knew to take rumours with a very big pinch of salt. Sure, there was corruption in the DEA as in any other governmental organisation, but he did not seem to be that kind of guy. Not that you knew him, anyway.
“Not even his childhood friends are speaking to him now, so if I were you, I’d keep my distance.” She warned you in a hush. “He’s trouble, that dude.”
That broke your heart a little. Javier looked lonely enough ― learning that he was truly on his own resonated loud with you. Being branded a misfit by his own community had to be a hard pill to swallow.
“Mhmm. Sure thing”, was your only reply. Alejandra tilted her head to one side, studying your blank expression. “I was just curious, that’s it.”
“If you say so. But don’t say I didn’t warn you!” Her veiled counsel hung above your head as you resumed the task of preparing his coffee.
Five minutes later you were done and walking back to where Javier was patiently waiting. As you approached his table, a guy pushed back his chair to stand up and hit you hard. You lost your balance, almost tripping with the legs of the chair. Your right hip slammed against the edge of an empty chair and prevented you from falling ― you managed to save the coffee, but the plate with the cake slice slid off your fingers and shattered against the floor.
“Hey! Watch it!”
For a second you thought it was the gentleman reprimanding you, but you quickly recognised the voice ― Javier had stood up, fast as thunder, and his index finger was accusatorily pointing to the man who had mindlessly pushed his chair back.
Before the situation escalated, you straightened out your back and planted a hand on Javier’s forearm to stop him from tackling the guy.
“It’s okay, it’s nothing. I wasn’t looking, it’s my bad.” You quickly tried to diffuse the situation, tension building up between the two men.
“No, it’s not.” Javier replied between gritted teeth. “This asshole should have seen you walking by.”
Your eyes widened as they flew from one man’s face to the other’s. Javier’s outburst was not welcomed by the other guy, who was clenching his fists at his sides. You put the surviving coffee down on a table nearby and placed yourself in the middle of both men, arms extended.
“No need to take this so seriously, it was just a bit of cake, and I’m not hurt.” You said looking at Javier with imploring eyes. You did not need this kind of trouble.
‘He’s trouble’, Alejandra had said. Should you listen?
“Please, accept my apologies.”
“I ain’t paying you shit now, treating one of your regular clients like this.” The man barked back, fuming.
Javier took a step forward and his chest pressed against the palm of your hand. You did not expect to feel his warm skin under yours ― a few unbuttoned buttons on his shirt gave you a peek of his hairy chest.
He clenched his jaw so hard you could see his muscles straining.
“Of course, of course. I’ll pay for it, it’s not a problem.”
Huffing and puffing, the man signalled to his companion and they both walked out the door, mumbling something you couldn’t hear but could imagine.
Slowly you turned to face Javier, whose eyes burnt like gasoline. You didn’t know if he was trouble, but he was definitely danger.
“It’s alright, relax. I’m sorry about the cake, I’ll get you another one. It’s on me, I kinda forced you to buy it.” You offered, thinking he was still mad, while you knelt down to clean the mess with some tissues you had grabbed from the table besides you.
“I’ll pay for it. For both slices.” He replied succinctly, squatting down by your side to help you out.
“You don’t need to”, you quickly said, watching him on the corner of your eye.
His expression softened a bit, and his lips turned into a grimace.
“I do. I think I made things worse for you.” You thought the same but didn’t dare to voice your opinion.
You were customer-facing and could hear your manager in your mind saying ‘The customer is always right. Treat ‘em like royalty’. Bullshit that, really, but was part of the job.
Once the mess was cleared, you gave Javier his coffee and ran back to the counter to cut another slice for him. This time, as you sauntered towards him, you were aware of your surroundings. Luckily, there were no more inconveniences, and the cake slice made it safe and sound to Javier’s table.
“Thanks. And sorry again.” He apologised, his tone throaty with truth. He really meant it.
“Don’t worry about it, honestly.” You grinned at him as you gently squeezed his shoulder without thinking. Javier’s eyes quickly darted down at the touch ― you could swear he flinched. “Oh― S-sorry”, you stammered, pulling your hand back to break contact.
Javier just hmphed and turned his attention to his drink and food.
With your brows knitting together, you made your way back to the counter. From time to time, you would check on him from a distance while serving other patrons. ‘Just making sure he likes it’, you told yourself every time.
After half an hour, Javier got up and walked towards the register.
“How was it?” You asked with a gleaming smile.
“It was good.” Surprisingly, you were slightly disappointed at his lack of enthusiasm. “Really good”, he added a second later, as if he had picked up on your disillusionment.
The smile came back to your mouth.
“Well, I’m glad.” You said while you typed in his order to produce the bill. “It’s $9.42.”
“How much was the… gentleman’s” he spat out the word, “bill? I want to cover it too.”
That offer took you completely off guard, and you started shaking your hands and head at the same time.
“No, no, no. It’s okay, I’ll pay for it. It’s not the end of the world.”
“I insist. Please.” He punctuated every word. “How much was it?”
“Uh, mhmm…” You didn’t want him to take the blow. Maybe he had made the situation worse, but at the end of the day, it was the other guy’s fault, not his. “Are you sure?”
He simply nodded.
“It was $25.37. So the total would be… $34.79.” You composed a pitiful face ― it was a lot of money for a coffee and a cake slice.
Javier handed you a $50 note and then said, “Keep the change.”
With your mouth agape with surprise and not really understanding his generosity, you looked down and extended your hand almost unwillingly.
“But this is a lot…” You started to complain. However, when you looked up at him, you only saw his back.
Javier was already walking out of the café before you could say anything else.
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Friday, 25th September 1998
Exactly a week later at ten past five in the afternoon, Javier Peña entered the café you worked at. Your brows furrowed, trying to recall last Friday. Had he gotten there at the same time too? He sat at the same table, same chair as well. The man was a creature of habit, a wild one at that.
Sooner rather than later, you were in front of him, notebook and pencil on hand, with a cheery smile.
“What can I get for you today, gorgeous?” You asked, hoping he would catch the joke ― you also followed a routine.
The joke went over his head. He looked less taciturn than a week before, albeit he still had this aura around him screaming to be left alone. Javier leaned back on his chair and this time, he did make eye contact, unlike last.
A slight yet noticeable change.
“A pumpkin spice latte, please.” This time round, his voice was a bit livelier although still crude.
“Anything else?” Your smile turned crooked as your eyes locked on his.
You saw a sparkle in them, a brightness that flickered under the fluorescent lights of the café. A hint of mischief, you thought too. He definitely had seen the joke now.
“Do you still have pumpkin cake? The one with cream cheese frosting?” He went off script, which made your grin grow bigger.
A creature of habit, but adaptable.
You nodded, writing the order down ― your tongue peeking through your teeth in full concentration.
“Freshly baked, I did it this morning.”
“If it’s half as good as last week’s, I might have to start coming over every Friday then.” A lopsided grin fought its way to his lips, although it didn’t stay there for long.
That brief gesture had transformed his expression, softening the hard edges of his jaw and smoothing out the wrinkles around his covered eyes. You noticed he still had his aviator glasses on, even though it was cloudy outside.
You were not prepared for his compliment, so you just tittered.
“If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to bake one every Friday as to not disappoint you”, you replied jokingly, albeit you truly considered it.
The shadow of a grimace danced on Javier’s mouth. The beginning of another smile, perhaps. Could you be so lucky that he would gift you with two grins in a row? That would be unheard of.
It wasn’t like you were watching him, but you were. Just a few glances here and there though, nothing too obvious. You did not believe in such things, but it seemed like his demons were following him wherever he went. Whatever darkness accompanied him, had a tight grip on him. You wondered what had happened to Javier to give off such an uneasy feeling.
The man was the epitome of wariness ― always looking above his shoulders, his hand tightly latching on to the buckle of his belt. Javier Peña looked like a man who always had a foot in the door, ready to run at the slightest inconvenience. And just because of that, you should be chary, keeping your distance. But it was exactly that, his raw loneliness, what pulled you into his orbit.
You were a fixer, and Javier was broken.
You were a puzzler, and Javier was a puzzle someone had tossed aside ― all the little pieces spread in disarray, unclassified, waiting to be put back together.
Question was, could he be fixed or was he shattered beyond repair?
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Friday, 2nd October 1998
“Let me guess. One pumpkin spice latte and a slice of pumpkin cake?”
Javier’s sunglasses reflected the light off the ceiling, his eyes catching a sliver of it. His fingers drummed against the table, his pearly white teeth peeking through the brief smile his lips composed just for you.
“It’s almost like you already know me”, he jested, flattening the palm of his hand against the table and sliding it off until his fingers wrapped around the edge.
That simple motion had you in a trance for a second, your mind blank.
“I do know a few things about you.” It slipped off your tongue before you could refrain yourself.
Once you realised what you had just said, your eyes slightly widened, and you unconsciously chewed your bottom lip.
“Do you?” Javier tilted his head to one side, his kempt moustache wrinkling with curiosity.
You nodded slowly and he cocked a brow, enticing you to continue.
“I’ve noticed you like a routine, always showing up at the same time, ordering the same thing, sitting on the same table, the same chair. And I know you love fall, because why would you be ordering a pumpkin spice latte every Friday since mid-September? With two sugar cubes. And when you attack the cake, you first eat the frosting, then the rest. That’s weird.”
You could have left it there so you wouldn’t sound like a stalker, but once you started talking, you could not stop.
“I know you feel like something, or someone, is following you. I know you always keep an eye on the door, making sure the exit is clear. I know you never turn your back to it either ― and that’s probably why you are, many a times, reaching for a gun in your belt that is no longer there. I know that you are lonely, but that loneliness is self-imposed. I know you don’t like being touched.”
You had definitely paid Javier Peña too much attention. Your last words did not really sink in until Javier’s amused expression transformed into knitting brows and a fine line for lips.
Had you gone too far in your analysis? Why would you say all those things to a complete stranger? When your slip of tongue dawned on you, you covered your mouth, embarrassed of yourself.
“Sorry, I-I didn’t mean to… I just― I shouldn’t have said anything. I don’t know why―” Your words came out in a slurred rush, incoherent and unfinished sentences got stuck to the back of your throat through all that stammering.
He leaned back, his arm loosely draped around the empty chair to his right, near the window. Javier then clicked his tongue.
“Well, I had it coming. I did ask, didn’t I?” His reaction surprised you ― you really thought he was going to up and leave because of your insolence.
You let go a sigh of relief, followed by a nervous chuckle as you hugged the notebook close to your chest.
“Was I… too far off?” You ventured, biting down your bottom lip again. Maybe you shouldn’t push your luck.
Javier took a long minute to respond, his eyes scanning every square inch on your face, as if he was trying to assess whether he could confide in you or not. You found yourself hoping he did.
“No, not really.” He conceded, “I do love fall.”
That hint of mischief you saw a week ago twinkled in his eyes again. Under that sombre and stay-away-from-me bearing, there was another Javier. One who could be mischievous and fun. One that you had been itching to know since he first set foot on the café.
This time was your turn to slant your head to one side, crinkling your lips as you attempted to discern if you were wrong about the rest. Was he playing with you?
“And the rest?” You pushed out of curiosity, knowing full well you shouldn’t take such liberty.
Javier shrugged, his shoulders almost touching his ears. Was he trying to hide a smile?
“I do have one more thing to add to my order.” The change of subject told you he did not trust you that much.
A pinch of disappointment settled in your chest. But you knew you shouldn’t feel this way, you didn’t really know him. For all you knew, he could be a serial killer on the lookout for his next victim and being a DEA agent was just a cover.
“Oh, yes, sorry. What else would you like?” You concocted a smile, but this time it felt forced ― too tense on the corners of your mouth.
Your sight was fixed on your notepad, not daring to glance down at him again. If you had, you would have seen his look of confusion. But you didn’t.
“Another pumpkin spice latte.”
You could not hide your surprise, so inevitably you asked, “Are you waiting for someone today?”
As soon as that question abandoned your mouth, you wished it back, mortified at your audacity. It was none of your business. And you didn’t care. Of course you didn’t.
“Yeah, you. You finish your shift in” he looked at his wristwatch, “fifteen minutes, right?”
You were left gobsmacked. Of all the things you had imagined he would say, that would not be an option at all.
“Uh― Ah, y-yeah?”
“See, you’re not the only one who is observant ‘round here. I do know pumpkin spice latte is your favourite drink too.” Javier explained so matter-of-factly, it would have been impossible to correct him. And he was right, anyway. “So, what do you say?”
You had not really given him an answer and he was obviously waiting.
“Yeah. Yes, of course.” You repeated yourself, a wide smile smoothing out your lips, your cheeks slightly blushed. “I’d like that.”
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Friday, 30th October 1998
Every Friday for the last four weeks had been exactly the same, and you couldn’t be happier about it.
Come ten past five, Javier would walk in through the door and sit down on the same table after his therapy session just a few blocks away. You would happily trot towards him, notebook on hand ― just a pleasantry, considering you knew his order by heart: two pumpkin spice lattes, one slice of pumpkin cake, two spoons. In fact, you had it written down before you reached him.
And then, every Friday, he would wait for the clock to mark half past five, coffee almost untouched and the cake slice still pristine on the plate. You would tell your teammates that you would be closing down and that they were free to go. You would rush through your tasks to get everything done before the clock read forty past five. A minute later the “Closed” sign would be hanging on the front door.
And then you would sit down with Javier, both lazily sipping away at your coffees and nibbling at the cake, while you shared your hopes, your fears, your ambitions, your struggles, your likes and dislikes, your pasts. His heavily charged with trauma and anguish, yours full of heartbreak and regrets.
You had learnt all about his time in Colombia ― the rise of the Medellin cartel, the fall of Pablo Escobar, the peak of the Cali cartel and the corruption deeply embedded in the Colombian government. And how it all shaped who he was now, how it all shattered him and his view of the world. All the things he had seen that still haunted him to this day, and how badly he wanted it all to go away. How gruesomely tortured he was by it all.
He had split himself open in front of you over the course of the last month, pouring his soul out while trying to detangle the mess his mind was in. And you could not help but feel for him, cry for and with him. His words had reached further down inside you than you were really aware of.
And while he was getting professional help for his PTSD, you liked to think that your long, deep conversations helped him interiorise part of the trauma, come to terms with it as much as he could. He had not said it out loud, not really thanked you either, but he didn’t need to ― you just knew.
You could not have refrained yourself from loving him even if you had tried. Over the course of the last few weeks, you had fallen for him with every detail you discovered about him. But your friendship had developed so quickly and so profoundly, you were afraid of ruining it. Ruining the only real connection you had felt in a long time.
It felt like the moment for love confessions was long gone ― it had slipped through your fingers without you even realising. And now it was too late to change it. Perhaps it was better this way ― you treasured Javier’s friendship more than anything else. You would not bargain with it, not if it meant there was a teeny tiny chance of losing him. You were not a gambler, not with the people you loved.
“I think you should pick up a camera again, see how it feels. Ignore what your parents have always told you for a moment. You don’t have to make a decision now, or ever, really.” Javier encouraged you, his palm flat against the surface, extended towards you, resting halfway through the table.
How badly you wanted to reach for him, to caress the back of his hand with your fingertips. But you didn’t.
“You’re right. It’s all I always wanted to do for a living. My job in finance, it was just their idea, really. They kept telling me that I’d die penniless on the side of a road if I chose photography as my career path.” You sighed, the spice of your coffee filling your sense of smell as you tipped the cup to your lips. “Do you have any plans for tomorrow?” You asked, an idea forming in your mind.
“No, I was just gonna help my dad on the farm.” Javier replied, a certain interest tinging his voice as he tilted his head ― his chocolate eyes holding your gaze as if it was a staring contest.
You had never met him outside the café, but you were friends. Surely there was nothing weird about meeting up with him tomorrow.
“Well, I was just thinkin’. Brought my camera and equipment when I moved. Tomorrow’s Halloween, could go to the pumpkin patch outside of town to take some pictures. I love taking pictures on fall, the colours are just beautiful. Would you want to join me?” A shy smile hovered over your lips, your heart slightly racing.
Javier’s eyes lingered on your face for an eternal second before he sipped at his coffee. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked ― you knew he didn’t feel comfortable with open spaces, not yet. He had told you about his panic attacks when he returned home and found himself in the open, exposed.
Suddenly, you felt so damn insensitive.
“Sorry, I know y―”
“I’d like that”, he cut you off before you could take the offer back.
Inevitably, your heart swelled, warmth pouring all over your body with his acceptance.
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Saturday, 31st October 1998
The car’s door slammed behind you after you rummaged through the backseat to get your backpack. It was full to the brim, as you had taken a few of your lenses, a tripod, a flash you were positive you wouldn’t need, and a few other bits and bobs.
“Sorry!” You apologised as your head buried between your shoulders.
God forbid you made a dent on Javier’s sparkling new Toyota Camry. Well, you didn’t know if it was new, but the car was impeccable inside and out. You were relieved he had offered to pick you up, otherwise he would definitely have judged you for the state your car was in.
“‘S alright.” He muttered, but on the corner of your eye you saw him smoothing out his hand around the edge of the door, ensuring you had not damaged it. “What are you carrying there anyway? Looks like you’re goin’ campin’, pequeña (little one).”
You snickered, Javier by your side in the blink of an eye. So close you could almost feel the warmth he irradiated, even in the crispy, spooky air.
“Oh, ‘s nothing, just a few things here and there that I hope to use later. Might need your help though.” You looked at him askance, measuring his reaction to your petition.
“My help? Mhmm.” He mumbled, almost laconic.
“It’s not too bad. And your aviator sunglasses will come in handy.” You laughed at the confused expression in front of you. “I’m not spoiling it.”
Javier’s lopsided smile made a brief appearance, but it suddenly vanished.
A backfiring noise from an exhaust pipe a few yards away made him flinch, his whole body visibly tautened ― his posture went rigid, his eyes frantically searching his surroundings while his right hand flew to his belt in a vain attempt to grip a gun that wasn’t there.
And then you saw the panic building up in his shielded irises. Even through the yellow tint you watched them darken, so opaque his pupils were indistinguishable from the brown. You could swear he had stopped breathing too, because his chest had not budged one inch.
Quickly you realised what was happening ― the sound from the car nearby had triggered Javier, bringing him back to one of his nightmares. His fight-or-flight response was taking over him, his mind suddenly replaying his time back in Colombia.
When you wrapped your firm hand around his wrist, you could feel his wild pulse under your fingertips ― his heart was beating so hard, it seemed like it was looking for the way out of his torso.
“Javier,” you called his name, giving him a gentle squeeze. He did not respond. “Javi”, you raised your voice over the cacophony on the background, your fingers tighter around his wrist, jerking him close to you.
Slowly he turned to look at you, long eyelashes fluttering, and it took him a moment to gradually come out of his daze.
With your free hand you rubbed his left shoulder, the first time you had been this nigh.
“Hey, Javi, are you okay?” You whispered, his eyes slowly drifting down to your mouth, as he was trying to read your lips rather than listening to your words. “It’s okay, you’re back home. You’re safe. You’re here with me, in a pumpkin patch just outside of Laredo. You’re safe, Javi.” You reassured him in a low voice, the abbreviated version of his name falling from your lips like honey.
You hadn’t realised how scared you were for him until he finally breathed. So did you. Your heart was pounding. Then he nodded, and you thought you saw a sliver of embarrassment in his eyes.
You wanted to comfort him so bad, tell him it was fine to be vulnerable ― but words escaped you, your chest heavy with affliction. The only thing you could do was wrapping your arms around his neck and bring him in for a hug. It only took him a second to swathe your waist, his face partially buried in the crook of your neck.
A shivering sensation down your spine gave you goosebumps. It felt so good having him this close.
“I’m fine.” He hummed eventually, as you both took an unwilling step back.
“I’m sorry. Truly. If you think this is a bad idea, we can just go back.”
He shook his head no.
“No, it’s alright. Gotta push through it at some point. Rather do it with you than alone.” Your heart melted at his words, almost swooning for him.
A soft smile spread across your lips, palming his forearm again. You could not have enough of his touch, of how his skin felt under yours.
“But if at any point it gets to be too much, you’ll let me know. Promise?”
You stuck your pinky out in front of him, asking him to pinky promise he would.
He returned your smile with a devastating one of his own.
“Promise”, was his reply as his pinky wrapped around yours.
Then you both erupted in laughter.
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For the next two hours you walked the whole patch together, taking as many pictures as your camera rolls would allow you. Luckily you brought more than one ― knowing yourself too well, you had brought three rolls.
“Hey, Javi! The golden hour is approachin’!”, you shouted at him, amplifying the volume of your voice by placing one hand on the side of your mouth.
Javier’s head poked out in between a humongous pile of an assortment of pumpkins. He went around it to be by your side in a couple of long strides.
“Is this where my aviator glasses come in handy?” He asked with a smidgen of inquisitiveness.
“Spot on. Come, follow me.” You curled your fingers to emphasize your words and you started walking towards a field further ahead.
It was isolated, the yellow grass up to knee height. There were some dead trees around, black branches peppered around the floor. Reaching towards your back, you untied the tripod from the side and set it up, taking your time, while Javi was right behind you.
“So you’re taking pictures of an empty field?” He asked, befuddled.
You just giggled as you knelt and settled your backpack down on the floor. Unzipped it and jumbled stuff around until you found what you were looking for. Snapping your tongue with delight, you pulled out two white bedsheets and a sunglasses case.
“Ha! Here they are!” You enthusiastically presented the objects to a confused Javi, his hands scrunching one of the bedsheets as you handed it to him.
“I don’t get it. You want me to make a bed out in the wilderness or somethin’?”
Shaking your head no, you laughed at his perplexity.
“No, you silly. We’re going to put them over our heads so we look like ghosts, like so.” And then you proceeded to demonstrate, covering yourself with the bedsheet.
Almost blindly, you took your sunglasses out of their case and placed them on the bridge of your nose and over the bedsheet.
“Voilà!” You extended your arms, showcasing your masterpiece to Javier.
You could barely see him through the linen, but his laughter reached your ears. You couldn’t help but smile wide as you grabbed one of the sides and pulled it up to uncover your face.
“I want you to do the same. I’ll set a timer on the camera, and we run over there.” You pointed to a space between some fallen trunks. “And then we just do some silly poses.”
“…Okay?” The hesitation in his voice was faked, because you could see a grin pinching the corners of his mouth.
“Trust me, it’ll look great. I’m a visionnaire!” You said with confidence as you turned around and set the timer. “Go, come on, run!”
You both sprinted to the specific spot you had directed your camera at, and quickly covered yourselves with the bedsheets. Laughing out loud, you both put the sunglasses over your faces and started posing while the camera clicked away at timed intervals.
Back to back with arms folded; one sitting down on the trunk while the other stood up behind; both hiding behind some dead trees with your heads sticking out; just staying still and very straight looking at the lens.
Even Javi got into it by the end, suggesting a few poses of his own occurrence.
You both were having so much fun, cackling so loud, you had tears pouring over your waterlines. You even bent at your waist, hands against your knees, while you tried to catch a breath. Javi was by your side chortling like a kid without a worry in the world.
You pulled the sheet off you and Javi followed suit. You could tell he also had teared up and that tugged at your heart.
“I wish we could see them now, but we’ll have to wait until I develop them.”
You stepped forward to get to the camera, but you tripped with the bedsheet. Clumsy as always, you waved your arms in a vain attempt to regain balance, and failed ― the grass on the ground hurrying towards your face, or, well― quite the opposite.
When you thought you were going to hit the floor, Javi’s broad hand clasped around your elbow and pushed you up, until your chest flushed with his. His mouth was so close to yours, his lips agape and so inviting, you licked your bottom one as you gauged the situation.
“You okay, pequeña?” His voice was just a hush in the confines of your mind.
Unable to speak due to his proximity, you just nodded as your eyes locked on his. This time there were no sunglasses covering his beautiful orbs ― giving you the opportunity to look into the abyss. His abyss. One you had been wanting to jump into for as long as you had known him.
His free hand rested on the small of your back, pressing you into him while his lips were dangerously close to yours. You could smell the hints of tobacco, the old spice, the sandalwood, all of it hijacking your senses.
Something passed between you two. Something that had been there for a while now; something you had not allowed yourself to see.
Too scared to ruin the friendship you so much cherished. Too frightened to have your heart broken again. Too afraid to make a move and be rejected.
But you didn’t need to.
Javier did.
In slow motion, he bowed his head down until his soft, warm lips ghosted yours. A light caress that made your heart jump a beat. And then he pressed them sweetly against your parted mouth, his tongue testing the waters between your teeth as you let him in.
Draping your arms around his neck, you kissed him fondly, tenderly, with all the love you had been stockpiling for a while. With his hands now on your hips, his thumbs gently rubbed the skin under your tee shirt, while your fingers raked through his hair.
And then, in the background, a clicking sound, then a flash. The kiss came to an end, not without Javi leaving a few chaste pecks on your lips before your mouths untangled.
You pressed your right cheek on his chest, eyeing the camera, and chuckled.
“It’s been taking pictures the whole time.” You told him, looking up at him with your chin against his sternum.
“Good. I’d like to have a memento of this moment, pequeña”, Javi cooed as he leaned back down to press another kiss.
“That makes two of us.” You purred, smiling into his mouth before his tongue sought yours again.
The distant howl of a wolf breached the haziness of the kiss and interrupted you. Only then, you realised that the sun had set down a while ago, and a red moon dominated the sky. The atmosphere was rather eerie, almost spooky.
“There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.” You quoted a sentence you had read once. “So maybe the moon has howled, and not a wolf?” That was your attempt at staying here, in your perfect, tiny bubble, a little bit longer.
Javi smiled, brushing his lips against yours.
“I rather not find out. Let’s head back, pequeña.”
He grabbed your hand, your fingers laced together, and pulled you towards the camera, him walking one step ahead of you.
One last click captured the final moment as you both sauntered towards it, hands intertwined, and Javi looking over his shoulder right at you.
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218 notes · View notes
thefearedashantis · 2 months ago
Text
Use Your Words
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Summary: Peter isn’t listening
Warning: None
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'Do you still love me?'
The question clangs painfully against the back of your clenched teeth when Peter mumbles ‘mhmm?’ for the fifth time throughout your story. The sudden urge to question his affections almost unbearable as you stand off to the side of his desk, still sweaty and in your outside shoes having been in a rush to tell him about your day. Heart leaping with joy over the compliment you’d received from a classmate in your poetry workshop.
“And then he bent me over and fucked me on the profs desk while everyone watched”
“Mhmm”
At least Ned and MJ were listening where they lounged about the room, albeit rosy in the cheeks. They encourage you to continue as if any of this could be remotely true.
“In fact, he asked me when we’d be able to make sweet love again.”
“Mhmm”
“Figured I could pencil a date in for next week seeing as I’ll probably be single by then”
“Yeah? That’s great junebug.”
Peter has not once lifted his gaze away from his laptop. The light of the screen reflecting off his glasses, casting a soft blue haze over his features.
Your two friends sensing the oncoming argument scuttle off silently to the kitchen with the excuse of wanting snacks.
“Petey?”
“Yes my love?”
“You know, if you want to break up all you have to do is say so.”
“Mhmm.”
You’re halfway to the door when his brows pinch inward. Shaking his head quickly, Peter struggles to rewind the conversation in between a slew of agonizingly complicated equations. His brain chugging along much slower than he’d like, than he's used to.
“Wait what?”
“I think I'll head home for the day, see you later," you mumble. You had some lectures to catch up with anyway.
He finally breaks away from the device, lowering the lid slightly “Wait bug what did you say?"
“Nothing.”
“No, you said something. Repeat it for me"
“I shouldn’t have to repeat it. You should have heard it the first time.” You spit over your shoulder, reaching for the doorknob.
Peters up, trailing behind you on long legs “Now hold on a minute, that's not fair.”
“And I wouldn’t be so bothered if this was a once in a while thing, but it's becoming an everytime thing! I come back after a good day or even a bad one, and I try telling you about it, and you sit there more focused on the performance of listening than actually listening." And what a performance it was. Leaning in, nodding with the occasional smile or eye contact or frown or gasp or laugh. All without actually having heard a word you said.
You listened to any and everything he had to share with enthusiasm and even questions to follow.
“That’s not true! I was listening.”
You cross your arms over your chest with a sceptical tic in your jaw “Ok, then what did my classmate say about my poetry?”
Peter stops in his tracks “um”
“quickly.”
“He said it was lovely?” You had used the word lovely in your story, but the questioning pitch of his voice has you fleeing all the same. He didn't know for sure if that was what you said.
Your fingers have just wrapped around the cool metal of the knob when all of a sudden your wrist is pinned to the door by a sticky white substance. A beat of silence resonates through the room before you're whirling on your boyfriend with twice as much annoyance as before.
“You did not just web me!” You yell
“Everything's happening too fast!” Peter wails, arm still extended from trapping you, pupils wide.
“Well allow me to excuse myself while the boy genius catches up,” you say, going for your keys. You'd use them to saw your way free, no matter how long it took. But as soon as you wiggle them free from your pocket, another web shoots out and sticks your free arm to the other side of the door. The keys clank uselessly to the ground. “Stop doing that!”
“Stop trying to leave!”
“If I don’t go now ill be late for my date with someone who actually cares about what I have to say!”
“I do care about what you have to say!" The wet rasp of his confession immediately extinguishs your anger. With a predatory focus, you hone in on the abrupt glossy sheen of his eyes, the rosy tint creeping up his neck. The way he starts to shift his weight from foot to foot, rubbing his plams against the abrasive material of his jeans. His lips tremble, pale with the force of his trying to keep them still. "I-" He chokes. Stops. Gaze snapping up to the ceiling before running to you. Working his jaw back and forth as if the words are fighting him, refusing to be spoken, "I've just been really fumbling with the whole juggling school and spidermanning lately.”
The sentence seems to zap what little energy he has. He stumbles in what you assume to be relief, to sit down on his bed. Removing his glasses, he tosses them without care, pressing his knuckles into his eyes and scrubbing at them cruely “…’m tired”
You watch in silence as Peter closes in on himself. He uses his hands to muffle his sniffles, but in doing so, allows a few salty drops to escape and slip along the slope of his nose. Falling from the tip, a row of tiny dark splots begins to form on his shirt. His tears only drip faster as the minutes tick by. His chest stuttering erratically with the task of inhaling and exhaling.
It makes you feel shitty but you don't try to comfort him.
You remain still and quiet as to not disturb the moment in fear that if Peter remembers you're there, he'll attempt to compose himself when all he really needs is to let it out.
When he's cried himself dry, you probe lightly “are you eyes hurting you again?”
He doesn't raise his head. You're faced with knots and tangles of brown “mhmm.”
“words please parker.”
“So much” he gasps, seemingly renewed with sorrow.
This is the boy, you realize, the one Aunt May has told you about amongst the shadows and hush of night. When you sleep over on weekends and wake up longing for a cold glass of water, slipping from bed a little while before dawn only to find her already up, never having actually gone to bed.
The boy who tries to shield his gentle soul behind humour and smarts. Who often takes on much more than he can handle to satisfy others, and is content to crush himself beneath the weight of responsibility if only to let one more person rest easy that day. The one who yearns to please above all else.
Peter often suffers from aches and pains, comes with the territory, but his facial discomfort has been a persistent problem of late. A deep soreness in his cheekbones, temples, behind his eyes, that no pain killer seemed to relieve.
“temple massage?”
“Please?”
With a final sniffle, Peters back on his feet. Swaying over, he makes quick work of freeing you. Pressing shy kisses of apology to your wrists.
No longer having it in you to be upset, you swat him back towards the bed, getting comfortable in your usual postions. Your back propped up on the pillows, Peter sprawled across your lap, face plastered against your tummy. His arms loop around your thighs, fingers playing with the stiching on your pants.
Retrieving the oil and comb from his sidetable, you set to work untangling his hair before you get to the real job of massaging his scalp and temples. A repetitive activity that allows you both time to think about what you've been truly wanting to say.
“You make me feel so invisible sometimes." You start. Peters' hair is soft despite being so uncared for. You comb back his bangs, cupping his face gently and shifting it to look up at you "like it doesn’t matter if I’m here or not. I know you're a busy person, and i accept and love that part of you. But all i ask is five minutes where we act like I'm not some annoyance.”
Insecurity was something you'd fought tooth and nail to rid yourself of over the course of your relationship. Not only a genius but a superhero , being interested in a mere arts major certainly took a toll on the psyche. Sometimes, you caught yourself slipping back into not so nice thoughts and behaviours.
A flash of hurt strikes across Peters face. When he speaks, warmth puffs under the hem of your shirt “I’m sorry. I'm not doing it on purpose. I love having you around and hearing about your day. It's the most relaxing part of my own."
“That’s why you need to tell me when you’re feeling overwhelmed so I can support you in the way you need. I never want you to feel like that.” Like there's nobody in his corner paying attention to his needs.
You accept the apology and continue with your work of destressing your boyfriend. His eyes fall shut after a time and you think he's fallen asleep, familiar with post cry exhaustion when,
“He said you write with patience, giving every word the chance to be what it wants to be” Peter whispers.
“Now, was that before or after he stuck his tongue down my throat?”
“Bug” he groans, springing up. He playfully shoves you back with an exaggerated scowl. You roll to your side, giggling at your own antics. Peter closes in. Slotting a thigh between your legs to lay his body against yours, smothering you with his elevated temperature.
“Trick question! It wasn’t his tongue he stuck down my throat.”
Another howl of disgust rips free from Peter “I hate you!”
“liar!”
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Divider: @sister-lucifer
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celestialalpacaron · 4 months ago
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Ayo, someone by the name of Curly-B-Blog is redlining art of yours from 2020 (while pretending that it's actually Sai Scribble's work), and kind of being a dick about it. just thought you should know.
You know, originally I was just gonna brush it off, but then I went back to look at my old SU art from 2020 and did so much self reflection from then till now.
I think this was around the time I was just learning how to do perspective and tried to use the perspective tool on Procreate for the first time? :0 and I remember telling Sai “Sai I have this STUPID idea, I CANT believe it this stupid joke it’s so DUMBBBB, it’s living rent free in my BRAIN I SWEAR THIS IS GONNA BE SO STUPID DCIUWHEFIUWHIRFUIW4F” and being super excited to show her the finished product. People still think Sai created the Cursed Skin Gloves comic and I think it’s hilarious wjhwnuhwijwuiw
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The comic was received very well and it made LOTS of people laugh and I’m still proud of this comic to this very day! :D and tbh if it wasn’t for my obsession for Sai’s Switcheroo AU I never would have found my passion in comic work! (love you you stinky hoe @saiscribbles 🩷)
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HOWEVER…. I definitely still had lots to learn! I wasn’t very good at perspective at the time I’ll admit, but I was definitely having lots of fun learning :3
And throughout the past 4 years, ALOT has happened.
I graduated from college with TWO fancy pieces of expensive papers in Visual Development in Animation and Illustration learning from Will Kim and Jeff Soto, and as a I was working with the funny voice man Cougar MacDowall as a comic/story artist and reached in total around 7 million views for my fan series FNAF Security Malware Breached (it was even #21 on the trending list around the time of my birthday 🩷 what a lovely gift), had an insane opportunity to work with Mike Geno and with the voice cast from The Amazing Digital Circus for a fan song as a background and character asset artist, Vivienne Medrano liking and sharing my silly Overlord Husk AU comics, currently on my route to getting my certificate from Aaron Blaise’s Character design program and graduating from Marc Brunet Art School, and now I am completing my first year as professional colorist and art assistant for my storyboard and comic mentor Michelle Lam, aka Mewtripled! (Also I’ll be heading out to Lightbox Expo 2024 on October 26 with Michelle and the team so if y’all ever wanna meetup hahahajaj wink wink wink wink wink)
So you can say I learned ALOT and I enjoyed every minute of what I do :D I try to be humble about my accomplishments because blah blah being humble good yes yes but this time I wanna be selfish and say HELL YEAH I DID ALL THIS!!! AND IM SO EXTREMELY PROUD OF MYSELF FIUGEIURGERGGRS
Now here’s my most recent comic page that I posted like 2 days ago without the text.
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That’s pretty freakin wild to me, I can’t believe I used to draw Steven Universe art like that back in 2020 LOL LIKE GUYS I DREW THIS!! WITH!!! MY HANDS!!! IS THAT NOT INSANE!!!???
Anyways moral of the story:
Learn from everyone and everything! Yes, even then mean ones too! If you can learn to work with anyone, I promise you’ll get to where you want to be faster. People can be a little mean on the internet, but that shouldn’t stop you from being where you want to be in the future. I’m so EXTREMELY grateful for all the opportunities and to all the kind professionals who were willing to give me a chance. Seriously, I’m so graciously thankful for everything, and I hope everyone here will support me and my silly little comics I will do now and in the future!
And one more thing:
Don’t be a jerk. Be to be nice to everyone :D nothing good comes out when you’re bad to everyone.
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