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cycwrites · 4 years ago

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WIP Things aka Unofficial Fic Tease

In order to remind myself that I’ve left all of you hanging for the rest of my trilogy rewrite, I thought I would post my unbeta’d, unedited, good with the bad chapter 1 for the second movie. I also have hope that it will make me feel guilty for taking so damn long and get back to it. Especially since I’ve basically closed myself off from writing (and the muses) and I’m trying to pry the doors back open because I really do miss sharing my stories with you guys.

I wrote this well over a year ago, along with a 2nd chapter that deals with the Dean’s office, and really just hope you like it.

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About Damn Time

Chapter One: So That Happened

Word Count: 2600 -------- ~B~

At the end of Beca’s junior year, two things of note happened.

First: Chloe, once again, made the decision to stay with Beca and the Bellas and failed Russian Lit for the third time. Beca had tried to talk her out of it, torn between wanting Chloe to move forward in her life beyond Barden and guilt that she was relieved they wouldn’t have to figure out how to work a long distance relationship. She wasn’t ready to try that and couldn’t imagine leading the group without her. But Chloe had insisted this was where she’d wanted to be and she didn’t feel like she was missing out on anything.

Second: The Bellas were asked to perform at President Obama’s 50th birthday celebration at the Kennedy Center on August 8th.

Beca had laughed when the call had come through the never used landline at the Bella house.

“Good afternoon, this is Mack Johnson and I’m calling on behalf of the White House…”

“Yeah right. Nice try, Jesse.” She hung up and pulled out her cell phone as she walked into the kitchen. Pausing by the counter she typed out a quick message to him.

Beca: I’ve gotta give you points for originality though. You almost sounded like an actual adult.

She poured herself a glass of lemonade before he answered.

Jesse: I’m going to take that as a compliment and ignore the wound to my manly pride, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Beca: Whatever you say, ‘Mack.’ If you’d said you were calling from anywhere but the White House I might’ve let you keep talking.

Instead of answering via text, Jesse called her.

“Are you day drinking, Mitchell?” Jesse clucked his tongue. “Without your lesbro? I’m hurt, Becaw.”

“I was going to ask you the same thing.” Beca lifted her glass and took a sip. “What inspired your call today?”

“Uh, your cryptic and confusing texts to me, of course.” Jesse chuckled. “Want to clue me in?”

Beca sighed. “Man you’re committed to this.”

“To what?”

Beca set her glass on the counter. “Fine – you just called me and –” She jumped as the phone in the living room rang for only the second time in her years at Barden. “Pretended… to be… from the White House.”

“I thought you said you weren’t drinking?” Jesse laughed but it sounded distant as Beca watched Chloe answer the phone.

Her girlfriend’s blue eyes went wide and locked on Beca’s as she said, “I’m sorry, did you say you’re calling from the White House?”

“Jesse?” Beca said absently.

“Yes, Beca?” His voice took on an echo as all the blood drained from her face.

“I gotta go pass out now.” She swallowed dryly. “I’ll call you later.”

“Beca wa-”

Beca had remained frozen in the kitchen while Chloe became more and more animated, frantically scribbling down notes on the notepad sitting beside the phone, though her voice was carefully calm and collected. Then she’d run into the kitchen, screaming and jumping in excitement and talking faster than Beca’s shocked mind could process. Drawn by the commotion like a frat boy to a kegger, the rest of the girls soon joined the chaos while Beca still stood frozen by the counter as they swirled around her.

The school had allowed them to stay on campus through the summer so they could discuss songs and choreography. The time had been a whirlwind of security checks and practice and everything they planned needed to be vetted by the performance organizers. Of course, since they’d come to the Bellas after their third ICCA win in a row, there weren’t any real problems.

Until the night of the performance when one set of tangled silks and a desire for no panty lines wrecked everything.

No pun intended.

~B~ Sunday, August 24th, 2014

Beca lay on their bed and stared at the ceiling, listening to Chloe pace beside her.

“I’ve ruined everything.” Pace to the head of the bed. “Destroyed our reputation.” Pace back to the foot. “Made the Bellas a joke.”

Beca sighed and pushed herself up on her elbows. “Chloe. It’s a capella. It’s already a jo-” She stopped as Chloe spun to face her, outraged. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it.” Beca tried a smile. “I was just trying to lighten the mood.” She let it slip when Chloe just stared at her and Beca dropped back down to gaze at the ceiling. “Won’t make that mistake again.”

“I’m the one who gave Amy the green-light to do ‘Wrecking Ball.’” Chloe resumed pacing.

“Because, despite most of her claims, she actually had done some training on the silks before coming to the states.” Beca countered, as she had for the past three weeks. “She was good on them and never once in our rehearsals did she get tangled up.”

“But-”

“No.” Beca cut her off and sat up, pulling her legs up to sit cross legged and face her. “We all agreed to let her do it. It was a group vote.” She softened her voice and held out her hand. “This isn’t all on you, Chlo.”

With a sigh, Chloe took her hand and let herself be tugged onto the bed. Beca stretched back out and Chloe settled against her side. “It feels like it.”

“That’s because you’re the one who looks out for us.” Beca gently rubbed her back. “No one could’ve predicted this, love.”

“No…” Chloe said grudgingly. “But…”

Beca cut her off again. “There’s no buts.”

“Except Amy’s.” Chloe huffed, tension that had begun to fade making her stiffen up again in Beca’s arms. “All over the news.” She groaned. “Why didn’t I just use the cloth I was freaking holding to cover her up?”

“Same reason I didn’t,” Beca said reasonably, having heard a version of this several times before. “My mind went blank and I couldn’t move. I just… kept waiting to wake up.”

“Same.” Chloe pressed her nose to Beca’s shoulder. “I still am. This is such a nightmare.”

“She feels bad.” Beca offered. “It was her idea to do that press conference.” She winced as Chloe snorted.

“Yeah, where she then tried to show her ‘silk burn’ to the entire world.” Chloe sat up and pushed herself off the bed. “Again.” She resumed pacing and Beca’s mind hunted around for anything she could say to defuse things.

“At least we saved Aubrey’s college legacy from Pukegate?” Even as the words were out of her mouth Beca knew they were stupid and wrong.

“And ruined ours with Muffgate.” Chloe snarled.

“I wish I could find the asshole that came up with that. Bet it was those podcast people and of course everyone else jumped on it.” Beca made a face. “It was an accident and eventually there will be another crisis for them to focus on.” She slid over to the edge of the bed and swung her legs over. “It won’t be forever, Chlo.”

Pace, turn. “But tomorrow we go see the Dean.” Pace, turn. “With those podcast people who are apparently actually part of the Collegiate A Cappella Association.”

“They’re still weird and he’s an ass.” Beca stood up and stretched as she heard the door open at the bottom of the stairs. “Think you’ll be able to enjoy yourself at dinner tonight?”

Chloe stopped by the small table they inherited from Aubrey and took a deep breath. “Of course. It’s Amy’s birthday. I’m not going to ruin it for her.” She flashed Beca a small grin, the first in an hour. “Why do you think I’m up here instead of downstairs?”

“Speaking of,” a new voice said from the stairs. “There’s maybe… A situation.” Jessica smiled apologetically when they both looked at her as she reached the top.

Beca sighed. “Of course there is.”

“Do I even want to know?” Chloe pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Probably not, but Stacie sent me to get you.”

“Coward,” Beca muttered. “She knows I can’t hit you because you’re too nice.” She took a deep breath. “Okay, quick like ripping off a band-aid.”

“Amy’s sitting on the couch. With a towel on her lap.” Jessica hesitated.

“That’s… Why is that a big deal?” Chloe asked, confused.

“She’s… commando. Because of her silk burn.” The blonde’s shoulders bounced once but she didn’t say anything else.

“I swear to fucking god I’m going to glue underwear on her,” Chloe muttered under her breath.

Beca was struck by a horrible thought. “Is she sitting on another towel?”

“We were afraid she’d show us if we asked.” Jessica looked at Beca. “That’s when Stacie sent me to get you.”

“Why do I have to do it?” Beca knew she was whining but couldn’t help it.

“Because you’re the captain.” Jessica shrugged again. “You can threaten her with cardio if she tries to flash us again.”

“Yeah but Amy doesn’t always listen to me and I don’t want to have flashbacks.” Beca reluctantly headed for the stairs as Jessica started back down.

“Birthday or not…” Chloe muttered as she followed.

“I’m sure Lilly has a hot glue gun you can use,” Beca mused, not surprised to find Ashley hanging out in the hallway when they left the attic.

“Don’t tempt me.” Chloe didn’t say anything else the entire trip down the stairs.

Beca rounded the corner, passing Jessica and Ashley who had stopped in the entry and came to a halt herself, Chloe running into her back.

All she could see was the back of Amy’s head but she appeared to be looking straight at Lilly who sat cross-legged on the ottoman and staring back.

“Do I even want to know?” Beca turned her head toward Jessica but didn’t take her eyes off the scene.

“I didn’t ask that either,” came the whispered reply.

Beca took a bracing breath then walked into the living room. Despite the reassurance that the covering towel existed, Beca didn’t relax until she saw it for herself. It was nothing personal against Amy, but Beca just didn’t want to see any of the Bellas naked, Chloe being the obvious exception. You never knew when the visual would pop back in your head and Amy had already shown up enough in the past few weeks to last a lifetime.

“Amy.” Beca looked up at a sound from the kitchen and saw Stacie leaning in the doorway with Cynthia Rose and Flo sitting at the center island.

“Captain.” Amy didn’t turn her head or avert her gaze.

“Are you guys in a staring contest?” Beca frowned, looking between the two women. “And if so why?”

“I don’t know,” Amy lifted one shoulder. “All I know is she hasn’t blinked since she sat down and why take the risk of losing.”

Beca felt her eyes twitch at the thought. “Jesus, please cut it out before my eyes start watering.” She stepped between them and Amy closed her eyes in relief.

“Thanks, Shawshank. That was starting to burn.” She started to lift one corner of the towel to wipe her eyes and Beca threw out her hand.

“Nope. That stays there.” Chloe said it before Beca could.

“Please tell me you’re sitting on another towel.” Beca sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

“Of course I am!” Amy actually looked indignant. “I’m not a heathen, Beca.” She rolled her eyes. “The pants I want to wear to dinner are tight, so I’m giving my bits time to breathe first.”

“Now that’s in my head.” Cynthia Rose muttered from the kitchen.

“That’s in all our heads,” Ashley said from the doorway behind them.

“You could always wear that blue skirt,” Chloe offered diplomatically. “That way you’re not uncomfortable for your birthday dinner.”

“I do look hot in that.” Amy thought about it while the rest of them made sounds of agreement. “Alright, you’ve swayed me. And as it’s almost that time, guess I’ll go upstairs and change.” She started to stand as Beca moved back then paused. “If you’d all turn around and give me some privacy while I wrap?”

Beca rolled her eyes as she turned to face the front window that, thankfully, had the curtains drawn. “That’s what you get for being half naked in the public areas of the house.”

“I got bored in my room.” Beca heard Amy stand up and the rustle of fabric. “Alright, I’m decent.”

“Hey!”

Beca jumped at the unexpected shout and looked over her shoulder. Stacie had come out of the kitchen and was pointing at the couch.

“That’s my favorite towel!” Outage filled her face. “I was looking for that for over a week!”

“It’s also the softest towel in the house.” Amy said as she picked it up, tucking the other firmly around her waist. “It’s the only thing that doesn’t hurt when I’m sitting.”

A choked sound from behind her brought Beca’s eyes back around to Chloe, who was biting the inside of her cheek and trying not to giggle. “I’m sure she’ll wash it before she gives it back.”

Beca tried to choke back her laugh and ended up sounding like a pug with a cold as she snickered into her hand.

“I think…” Stacie sighed. “Happy Birthday, Amy. It’s all yours.”

“You sure, Stretch?” Amy threw the towel in question over her shoulder. “I don’t think I’ll need it for much longer.”

“Yup.” Stacie nodded emphatically. “I’ll go get another one this weekend.”

“Thanks, Stacie.” Amy smiled at her before her lips twisted slightly. “Sorry I didn’t ask first.”

“’S okay.” Stacie shrugged. “Now go get changed so we can celebrate your day.”

“Are you allowed to give me orders on my birthday?” Amy mused as she headed for the stairs.

“Probably not,” Beca said. “But I’ll probably do it anyway.”

“Bossy.” Chloe whispered behind her and Beca flashed her a grin.

“Alright.” Beca clapped her hands once. “Show’s over, let’s go get our party outfits on and get some grub. We’ve got a Bella to celebrate.”

Stacie walked past her, shaking her head. “Bossy.”

Beca let her head fall back as she stared at the ceiling. “I can’t with you two.”

“What?” Stacie paused in the door to the entry. “Did we do the thing again?”

“Yup.” Chloe pushed Beca toward the stairs. “I called her that thirty seconds ago.” She high fived Stacie over Beca’s shoulder when the tall woman grinned and held out her hand.

“Score one for us.” Stacie laughed and started up the stairs.

“I hate you guys.” Beca said weakly as she followed.

“Liar,” Chloe laughed and ran her hand down Beca’s back.

“Maybe.” Beca let Chloe go before her.

“Definitely.”

“Yeah yeah,” Beca waved her up the stairs, unable to help admiring the way Chloe’s muscles flexed as she moved. “But seriously, my stomach just woke up and if I don’t feed it soon it’s going to take over the world.”

“Aye aye, Captain.” Stacie saluted as she stepped into her room.

“Smartass,” Beca threw back.

“And you love it.” Stacie closed the door with a laugh.

“Stop flirting with Stacie and let’s go change before you get hangry.” Chloe took her hand and tugged on it.

“She wishes,” Beca muttered but followed Chloe up to their room, ignoring the ‘Often’ that came from Stacie’s room behind them.

‘She’s got bat hearing, I swear.’ Beca thought to herself as she went to the closet to get her outfit for the night.

Tomorrow was still looming over them, but Beca pushed it all away, determined to think about Amy and the Bellas for the rest of the night.

It was one mistake and they’d just won three years in a row. Surely they weren’t in that much trouble.

Right?

#bechloe #beca mitchell #chloe beale #all the other bellas #rise 1 #cyc fic tease #cyc motivational seeker

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obsessivelollipoplalala · 5 years ago

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You seem into musicals. Can you tell me what's wrong with Hamilton? When I first heard of it in 2016 it was praised. But then people started criticizing it angrily, saying it was racist and classist. I didn't look into it more for a long time cuz i didn't care, i dont even know the plot. But it's all over my dash again and I googled it and all I can find are opinion pieces insulting the lyricist's musical skill and saying "Hamilton is bad in every way." without providing a reason.

Oh girl, it 100% got the typical tumblr cringe culture treatment. Hamilton was (still is) super popular in real life, and the weirdos on here can’t be caught dead liking things earnestly, especially not something that other people like! You silly goose. Enjoying things is cringy! So, like every other piece of popular media that tumblr liked, it quickly turned around to tear it to shreds and claim anyone who likes this award-winning musical is #cringe (I guess that includes Barack Obama LOL).

Because it’s tumblr, they’ll never actually admit to hating something for the petty need to feel superior to others by being edgy and hating mainstream media; they have to claim it’s evil and that those who enjoy it are bigoted. I mean, I think what Lin-Manuel Miranda and the original diverse cast of Hamilton did was insert people of color into the myth of America, and I mean myth in the sense that history can get to the point where it’s like a cultural myth. We all know damn well that the Founding Fathers were white slave owners, but Hamilton gives actors of color a chance to insert themselves into the story of the beginning of America. But tumblr completely reduces it to “It’s about slave owners so it’s evil and liking it is bad.” Were there fans on here who stanned the Founding Fathers? Yes, but anyone with common sense knows that’s a tiny minority of fans of this musical lol. All fandoms do stupid shit. People (not just on tumblr, even edgelords on twitter) act like Hamilton is #neoliberal propaganda to get people to stan colonizers, but it’s really just a musical telling the story of the complicated people that were the Founding Fathers lol. History is messy but worth talking about, and making art from history isn’t wrong. Everyone not dipped in 10 layers of cynicism knows that. The best was when I saw some non-American on twitter ranting about how evil Lin-Manuel Miranda is for writing a musical about slave owners and like....girl you don’t even live here lol. Just don’t listen to the musical.

I also find it pretty insulting to the diverse casts of Hamilton to imply that they’re somehow too stupid to realize they’re a part of this #propaganda, or even outright malicious for being in a piece of media that tries to present the thoughts and motivations of these historical figures. The same goes for poc who are fans of it. It’s like...some people really think poc are stupid, huh. You think they don’t know the complicated start of America??? Maybe they’re more informed than you but have, wait for it, critical thinking skills 🤔. But I digress.

Tl;dr the fact that you could only find vague opinion pieces like “musical bad!” is telling. Tumblr just hates Hamilton because of cringe culture, and fails to realize that most people outside of this site still like it—as is the case for most things this site hates lol. Even if you wind up listening to it and not liking its style, I think you’ll see the hate is way overblown.

Edit: wait LMAO how the fuck is it classist?

#hamilton #anti cringe culture #replies #anonymous

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relationshipsandpolitics · 5 years ago

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Part 3

Since I last posted, we’ve gotten word that a certain rich asshole is going to enter the race. Now, I could do 500 words on why this guy is awful, but it would sort of go against my belief that just because someone is really rich does not mean we need to pay extra attention to them and their thoughts. This guy is not winning the nomination, won’t even poll about 3% in most states, and overall is not worth the amount ink that will surely be spilled on his campaign. Next.

Joe Biden. Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders

So we are down to the final 3. One of those 3 objectively should have been culled much earlier. If I was doing this purely based on the level of support for each candidate, this guy would have been cut about 8 candidates ago. But Joe Biden is still the front runner, consistently leading national polls and absolutely killing it in several early primary states like South Carolina. Biden remains popular among black voters, who serve as the lifeblood of the Democratic party. Even though his policies and personality suck, he is unique from all the other shitty centrist candidates. So he gets his own takedown.

Joe Biden is a very old man hoping to blind the voters with his connection to President Obama. And for the most part, it’s working like a charm. Forget the fact that he is a rambling, incoherent mess during campaign stops. Forget his abysmal views on race, including his support for segregated busing and racist colleagues. Forget the fact this guy railroaded Anita Hill and still can’t sufficiently apologize to her. Forget all the bad parts of Joe Biden. That’s what he is banking on. Biden is trying to win not based on policy or his strategy for improving the lives of everyday Americans. No, he is trying to win by painting a false image of who he is and how electable he would be. Biden is basing his entire campaign on appealing to low-key racist white suburbanites who don’t want to pay more taxes. That’s his base. And it’s not an awful strategy. But it highlights something terrible about the Democratic voter.

The average Democratic primary voter appears to support progressive causes. They want to see Social Security expanded. They support a $15 minimum wage and gun control. They support paid family leave and some form of universal health care. But the average Democratic voter of a certain age, race and class level doesn’t want to fight for those things. Because while they agree with those policies in principle, they won’t be that affected by them, and more importantly, would have to pay more in taxes. So they say they support these goals yet refuse to put any skin into the game to achieve them. The other possibility is that they would support enacting these policies and paying a bit more, but they don’t think anyone else would and thus think we need to support the least-controversial candidate. No one really likes Joe Biden, or if they do, no one can really identify what exactly he is running for. Even though health care remains a joke in this country, Biden isn’t arguing to make it better. He isn’t supporting a wealth tax. What is this man running on except a vague idea about returning dignity to the American worker. Yet voters still support him, either because they know he actually won’t change anything (except make it ok to be gay again) or because they think not changing anything is the only way for a Democrat to win.

The American voter (not just Democratic voters) collectively is a stupid person. They personally want a politician to enact massive change to better their lives, yet believe the ideal candidate is a moderate who won’t do anything major, and still someone in doing nothing substantial, will improve their lives. Then, just to double down on that stupidity, they will vote the opposition party into power in Congress to ensure nothing happens, all because they love compromise. Of course, the last thirty years of politics have shown that bipartisanship is a myth.

The American voter is both very ignorant and very naïve. We accept that. But it’s tougher to accept that from our politicians. At a recent fundraiser for millionaires, Biden touted his sincere belief that when Trump goes, Republicans will have an epiphany and start working with him to make our country better. Folks, this is disqualifying. The sheer insanity of that belief needs to be a deal breaker. Biden, in the very same speech to the very same contingent of rich assholes, said that he personally called dozens of Republicans to get Merrick Garland on the Supreme Court. The Republicans said no and pulled a move so disgusting and unprecedented that we will never see something worse in our lifetimes. And this was all before Trump was even nominated.

Joe Biden is an idiot. He also is in the bag of the rich. He regularly attends fundraisers hosted by lobbyists for some of the most nefarious industries. His campaign is mostly funded by Wall Street and Health Insurance. And how do you think he’ll govern once in office? Will he go after these bad actors? Or will he appoint them to his Cabinet? Remember, this is the guy who worked in an administration that wanted Larry Summers as Fed Chief. He appointed Timothy Geithner as Secretary of the Treasury.

Joe Biden would continue the worst aspects of Obama’s administration without all the good stuff. He’d be in his late 80’s by the time his second term ended, too. For the love of all that we hold holy, we cannot nominate Biden.

It is now time for the top two candidates. I would happily vote for either of these candidates, so my choice for one is not a slight on the other. Each candidate has issues, but they are minor compared to what they bring to the table. So I urge you to vote early and often for either of them.

Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders

A presidential candidate should make you excited to vote for them. It can’t just be “I can’t vote for the other guy so I guess you’ll do.” It’s a recipe for disaster. People need a reason to take a couple hours of their day, find parking, wait in a long line, deal with eighty-year old volunteers who yell at you to close the curtain more, and then go into work and deal with their daily amount of shit. People need a reason to see the process of voting as exciting.

I think Bernie and Elizabeth are the only two candidates one can reasonably get excited about. I’m not saying everyone will be excited by them because a lot of people don’t support their policies. I call these people assholes. But can anyone honestly say they are excited to vote for Amy Klobuchar or Joe Biden? Even if you support their bland policy proposals which consist of “we need better jobs but fuck if I know how to do that.”

But which one to choose?

I’m going to start with Bernie. The negatives against him are one of perception rather than reality, but in politics its not the truth that wins out but what you can convince people the truth is. And Bernie will definitely be portrayed as an out-of-touch Socialist. While the youngins like the word “socialism” the majority of the electorate is still scared to death of the term because they equate social democratic government as the Soviet Union and bread lines. In other words, most people are stupid. Sanders best hope would be to hammer home how amazing European countries are, the benefits they enjoy without all the negatives that Republicans conjure up in places like Venezuela. Unfortunately, Republican messaging still rules the day. Even if you could strap a person in a chair and explain point by point why Sweden and Denmark work as social democracies, they still wouldn’t get it.

Trump will absolutely attack Bernie for being a socialist, and the problem compared to the other candidates he would attack for being a socialist is that the suburban Democratic voters would actually believe him. Bernie absolutely will upend the system, and a lot of people are still benefiting from that system. People like my parents. They have a good amount of money but are not rich. Taxes going up on them will impact their daily lives, and most of the benefits Bernie is advocating for would not benefit them. There is a lot of good research out there that suggests the key for Democrats to win across the board is to get the suburban moderate vote. And there is a legitimate argument that Bernie will not get that vote. Now, one can say that those voters would never vote for Trump. But you must remember a very important thing about politics: white people can get pretty racist when they think you’ll take money away from them.

But here’s what I love about Bernie. He is entirely genuine in his advocacy for the poor and working class. Most politicians say they care, of course. They give a speech supporting raising the minimum wage or not cutting Medicaid. But they also tie themselves with rich donors and businesses whenever they can. They support the poor until there is a good reason not to. Not Bernie. He’s been singing the same tune since the sixties. He doesn’t care if it isn’t popular. He’ll make it become popular. Bernie almost single handedly shifted the conversation on universal health care. We are talking about paid family leave and free college because of him. And the man deserves credit for that.

Bernie has been hit a lot from the Democratic establishment. People are still sore that he had the audacity to challenge Hillary Clinton. Even though he endorsed and campaigned heavily for her after dropping out in 2016, there is still a narrative that he sabotaged her campaign. Let’s be clear, though. The reason why the establishment Democratic contingency dislikes Bernie is because he thinks they are just as corrupt as the Republicans. Which is true. Democrats work out of the same bubble as Republicans. They rub shoulders with the same Wall Street donors. Try calling up your Democratic Senator to get an in-person meeting. Now look at who does get those meetings. I support Bernie because he actually is trying to change our corrupt political system. A politician can’t work within the given system without being corrupted by it. The system is a cancer that needs to be destroyed.

Bernie has said some dumb things and has held some dumb positions. This can’t be denied. He’s been accused of being a racist, sexist and homophobe. Some of this is absolute bullshit and some of it is based on dumb things he’s said. But judging by the policies the man has supported, the votes he has taken, and what he has said during the 2016 and 2020 campaigns, does anyone honestly believe him to be a racist, sexist or homophobe?

If you are having a tough time getting behind Bernie, I’d ask yourself the following questions:

Do you honestly believe he would pursue anti-women and anti-reproductive rights policies?

Do you think a more robust paid family leave policy, along with a policy promoting affordable childcare, would significantly benefit women?

Do you think Bernie would restrict LGBTQ rights or would he expand protections for this group?

Do you genuinely believe Bernie would support or champion policies that would discriminate against black people?

Do you think health care is a crisis in this country and everyone should have access to it? If so, do you think Bernie makes the situation better or worse?

Do you think a president should fill his administration with people from the financial and insurance industries? Do you think Bernie would do this?

Do you think millionaires and billionaires should be taxed more and more money should go into programs that help the poor and middle class?

Should college be free or at least much more affordable?

Ask yourself these questions. Don’t worry about whether he can get them passed. Truth is it will be tough for any Democrat to get anything passed. I’d be looking at which candidates are most willing to use executive orders (hint: it’s Bernie).

We can’t keep hedging our votes on what’s practical because the truth is everything is doable with enough willpower. Think about how insane Social Security is as a legislative success. We taxed everyone, rich and poor, to provide money to senior citizens for the rest of their lives. That’s insane, and we did it. Same with Medicare. If you think are country needs massive changes to secure our future, vote for the candidate who is advocating for massive changes. That candidate is Bernie Sanders and…..

Elizabeth Warren. Everything good about Bernie can also be said about Elizabeth Warren. This is a person who literally created an agency designed to help consumers go against corporations. Warren has correctly diagnosed the problem for wealth and income inequality and a lot of the bad shit that’s been happening to the American worker. Corporations suck. Rich people suck. They both need to be taxed way more and we need to use those funds to give benefits to the poor and working class. Warren has a plan for pretty much everything, and that is a great thing. She doesn’t talk in platitudes about restoring dignity to the working class. She identifies the problem and comes up with an actual solution.

And for her efforts she gets skewered by her opponents and the media. When Pete Buttigieg says we should invest more in affordable housing, no one pushes back on exactly what that means. But when Warren releases a comprehensive plan to pay for Medicare for All, she is eviscerated. Her plans should be critiqued, but they should also come with the acknowledgement that she has put in the work and is way more open with the American people than the other candidates. The media and voters need to start making candidates pay a price for not articulating actual plans for their policy goals.

Warren is fucking smart and driven. She has the brain and energy to do the job. She’s not a crackpot; she’s an advocate for the little guy. Honestly, there isn’t much to criticize Warren on outside of how she will pay for her policy proposals. But the media will attack what little they have while giving Trump and the more moderate Democrats a pass. When Trump or Biden talk about strengthening the military, no one will ask what that means and how much it will cost. But when Warren comes up with a tax plan to pay for free childcare, every single pundit will pounce the second some study comes out that her funding is off by a few million.

Of course, the dumbest part is the idea Warren needs to fully fund any proposal. Right now, the economy has been doing great for about five years. And in that whole time, we’ve been running huge deficits. Maybe government spending without offsets isn’t such a big deal. Warren can’t say that because the media won’t allow her to. It would be great if Warren could just say “things are going great now despite a trillion-dollar deficit, so why not get free healthcare for a $2 trillion-dollar deficit?”

That’s what I love most about Warren. The lines of attack against her are so shitty. Bernie has legitimate concerns that the Republicans will easily exploit. The best they can do with Warren is attack her policies, which are broadly popular. And with Warren, you get a bunch of different contingencies that will come out for her. You have women and those who want to see our first female president. You get progressives excited about finally having a candidate who advocates for them with a fighting chance. And because she is being so careful not to raise middle class taxes, I think you get a lot of the suburban vote.

I think Warren can win this thing. She articulates the message well, she lacks genuine baggage and when compared to Trump, she comes off even better.

So who is my final pick? I’m going with Elizabeth Warren. Not only does she hold most of the same policy positions as Sanders, but she also is fundamentally opposed to the corporate interests that got us to this point. And I think she can better cajole moderate Democrats to support her agenda. Finally, I think she comes with less baggage.

What I would love to see, based on the polling, is for Warren to either win or come in second by a close margin to Biden or Buttigieg. Sanders would drastically underperform, at which point if New Hampshire was also going poorly, he could drop out and swing all his support to Warren. That would make her the clear front runner. Let’s see what happens.

Elizabeth Warren

#elizabeth warren #bernie sanders #joe biden

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forsetti · 6 years ago

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On Progressive Politics: Wants, Needs, Racism, and Social Justice

For a good portion of my life, I believed racism was overt actions like the KKK burning down black churches and lynching people. It was someone saying, “nigger” with animosity and disdain. It was separate drinking fountains and signs that declared, “Whites Only.” Sure there were still racists in America, but they were a small and dying group. I was wrong. Very, very, wrong. There are lots of reasons why I was wrong. I was wrong because I grew up in the bubble of a small town in Southeastern Idaho and was never exposed to the full spectrum of racism. I was wrong because the real history of racism in America has been intentionally hidden and denied. However, the main reason I was wrong is that as a white male, I have benefited the most America’s long history of racism and willingly or not, I had been part of the problem. As someone who has prided himself on being a staunch progressive and defender of equality and justice, the realization of my own ignorance and culpability in America’s racism has been a very humbling and painful process. The depth and breadth of the problem are also very overwhelming and depressing. My attitude about the problem constantly fluctuates from white-hot anger to existential nihilism. I either want to take to the streets in protest or drink myself numb. There are times when I think something can and should be done. At other times, I think the problem is too ingrained in our culture for anything to change because there are too many ignorant and apathetic white people who keep breeding and passing their idiot traits down to a new generation of would-be racists. Adding to my feelings of hopelessness, there are too many “well-meaning” white people who don’t want to rock the white supremacist boat because deep down they enjoy the benefits of racism.

Because of how entrenched racism is in America, because of how long it has been going on, because of how reluctant even the most well-meaning whites are to real change, I have no suggestions on how to adequately address the problem and can’t even begin to comprehend how to make amends for the three-plus centuries of damage done by racism. While I might not know what to do to correct the problem, I sure as fuck know what not to do to aggravate it. The lessons I’ve learned the past few years may be few in number, but they have completely altered how I, a fifty-eight-year-old white man, views the world.

This new view as made me hypersensitive to anything that caters to the status quo. Conservative politics has been built on catering to the notion of white supremacy since the Civil Rights Act was passed in 1964. I expect nothing less from them and am never surprised by anything they do or say, even Donald Trump who is just being more open and honest about the conservative strategy than most. Since I am not a conservative and do not give a rat’s ass about what they do/don’t do because I have zero expectations they’ll ever change or listen to reason, I won’t address them, their attitudes or policies. It is progressives who I (reluctantly) rest my hopes on.

There is a very disturbing trend among some progressives when it comes to how people of color vote. In 2008 progressives who supported Hillary often denigrated anyone of color who voted/supported Barack Obama. Their support was written off as not being thoughtful. I hear a lot of progressives claim that POC voted for Obama not because they thought he was a good candidate or the best choice, but merely for the fact he is black. Eight years later, that same attitude flipped from Hillary supporters to her opponents but with regard to gender not race. It was complete bullshit in 2008 and it was complete bullshit in 2016.

In 2016 Hillary has won a large majority of black and Hispanic votes. Bernie did much better with white men. These facts don’t mean anything by themselves. They do, however, have significant meaning when you look at the strategies and words of the candidates and, more importantly, the beliefs of the minority voters. I believe the latter is a direct reflection of the former.

If your spoken strategy is to “bring white working-class voters back to the Democratic Party,” you are not only on a fool’s errand, but you are also going to alienate minority voters. When your supporters are condescending to minorities when they vote for your opponent, you are on the wrong side of this issue. I see a lot of the white, male, Democratic candidates this time around making this same mistake. It really doesn’t matter if this is being done on purpose or out of ignorance. The only things that really matters are how it is perceived and what will it do to address the problem of this strategy's underlying racism.

Going after the white working class vote is a really bad strategy for a number of reasons. This group has largely already been voting for Republicans who have fed their fears and white supremacy for decades. In fact, no Democratic presidential candidate has won the white vote since the passage of the Civil Rights Act. This isn't a coincidence. White voters are not going to suddenly listen to reason or be willing to admit their economic decline is a direct result of their own voting patterns. However, the real problem with this approach is it continues the long history of being concerned more about the situation of whites than minorities. Even with many white working class people stagnating economically, they are still infinitely in a better economic state than minorities. Putting your main focus on the group that needs the least help is politically tone deaf if you are progressive. Another reason this strategy is a really bad idea is it completely ignores the demographic trends of the Democratic Party. White voters are becoming a smaller and smaller portion of the voting pie. Putting them as your main emphasis on winning an election is just plain stupid. Even if you do win, you’ve sown negative seeds with the largest growing part of your base which will have repercussions down the road. Demographically, progressives have the advantage against conservatives, why on earth would you do anything to damage this and give conservatives an opening to gain traction with minorities or alienate them to where they don't vote? This doesn’t mean you should ignore white voters. It means you don’t make them the focal point of your campaign. It also means you don’t sell your ideas to minorities as “they’ll also benefit,” but you sell your ideas to whites that “everyone benefits.”

One of the main things I have learned the past few years is to really listen to the people who need the most help, who will suffer the most if the right policies are not enacted, who has the most to lose if the right people aren’t elected. There are a lot of groups this applies to, but one really stands out; black women. It was black women who helped elect President Obama in 2008. They definitely were the major force behind his reelection in 2012 when a lot of white progressives stayed home. While a President Romney and a GOP controlled Congress might have had negative consequences for white progressives, it would have decimated black households who are holding on by a thread. Every positive thing President Obama did was a direct result of black women voting for him en masse.

Blacks and other minorities are focused on the bottom two levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Whites progressives are focused on the top two. White progressives, as a group, are not worried about whether they’ll have food to eat, shelter, security… They are focused on feeling good about their job, their self-esteem, being respected for who they believe they are (superior)… Morally and from a progressive political point-of-view, one of these takes priority over the other. What I see far too often from white progressive politicians is a supply-side approach to justice, equality, opportunities. If whites are helped, the benefits will trickle down to minorities. Supply-side economics is complete bullshit. Supply-side anything is complete bullshit. If you are pushing a top-down political agenda, you are not progressive. It doesn’t matter what your intentions, how deeply you believe it, how long you’ve been advocating it… You are either helping those who need the most help first and foremost or you are not. There are no linguistic or argumentative gymnastics that can change this reality. The people at the bottom of the hierarchy know this and can see through bullshit because they deal with it each and every day.

I’m not saying certain aspects of Bernie’s or any of the other white, male candidate's agenda would not help those at the bottom of the hierarchy a lot, they would. What I am saying is making your focus bringing back white working-class voters to the Democratic Party and trying to sell it as “it will help minorities too” is completely misguided. I’ve listened intently to Bernie since he decided to run. This is exactly what he says and how he tries to sell it. It is why almost all of his events are in college towns that are predominately white. It is why he has focused his campaign heavily in states that have a high percentage of whites. Whether intentional or not, the attitudes behind are picked up by his supporters. When I see and hear his supporters and spokespeople say derogatory things about minority voters who supported Hillary, I see it as a reflection of the campaign’s attitudes and strategies. When Hillary won Southern states because of the black vote and they talk about her “winning the Confederacy” and “winning red states that won’t matter in the general election,” I hear the dog whistles of progressives. It isn’t KKK racism, but it is racism nevertheless. When Joe Biden or Mayor Pete constantly talk about the pain and suffering of white, rural Americans, I hear these same dog whistles. It doesn't matter if they are intentional or not. Their impact is the same. What they are signaling to minorities is their vote isn't a priority. What they are signaling to white voters is their votes are. This is both strategically and morally wrong. The more and harder white Democratic candidates chase after white votes, the more it sends a message to their staunchest, most loyal, most in need of their help the base they are second-class voters.

In 2016 I heard a lot of Bernie supporters say, “black voters just don’t know what they are doing,” or “if black voters REALLY understood Bernie’s policies, they’d vote for him.” The white supremacist condescension of this is thick and telling. I’m pretty sure black voters know exactly what they want from a candidate and who will best help them. They were pretty clear, it isn’t Bernie Sanders. White progressives don’t need to agree with this, but they have to respect it. When they don’t, they are nothing but racist-lite whether they realize it or not, whether they admit it or not. White progressives need to stop telling minorities what is best for them. I’m not saying minorities didn't have issues with Hillary and her campaign. They did. However, when it came time to pull the lever in the voting booth, they overwhelmingly choose her over Bernie by a considerable margin. Minority voters saw the candidates and to Bernie they said, to quote from “A Knight’s Tale,” “You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found absolutely wanting.”

My view in 2016 of the Democratic Party and the two major candidates for president was formed over a lot of time and thought. It has been helped along by a couple of different sources as well as the most influential work on social ethics I’ve ever read. The two outside sources that had the greatest influence in pushing me to a better understanding of the issues could not be more different. One is a black woman on Twitter, Propane Jane, the other is a reformed white conservative blogger, John Cole. Propane Jane is a psychiatrist from Houston Texas who, when she isn’t writing books goes on twitter rants that are so precise, brutally honest, and insightful about racism in America, I’m often stunned how 140 characters can have so much impact. She has no time for bullshit or sugarcoating. Every once in a while she will say something that at first blush seems completely wrong and my defenses go up. But, if I put my defense mechanism away and am honest about the tweet, she’s completely right. Her tweet storms are so legendary, they are often storified by others. Here is one from January that gets to the heart of the problem with the Democratic Party and Bernie Sanders’ campaign with regard to their base: John Cole at “Balloon Juice,” started blogging in 2002 shortly after 9/11. He was a die-hard conservative. The actions of the Bush administration in Iraq, Abu Gharib, and the Terri Schiavo case pushed him to take a hard look at his belief in conservatism. His blog went from being a go-to site for staunch conservatives to a mainstay for progressives. Earlier this month he wrote an article titled: “I’ve Kind of Made My Decision,” that addresses his take on the Democratic primary and why he is supporting Hillary. When I read it, I said to myself, “This is exactly how I feel and why.” He lays out a number of reasons he is supporting Hillary over Bernie, but the one that stood out to me was the one where he admits that since the 2008 campaign, he has been exposed to more voices of women and POC and it has made him reevaluate how he views politics. “In my opinion as a white single male with a degree of financial stability, beyond agita and heartburn, I have very little at stake in this election. I’m not going to be drafted, my insurance won’t be lost if ACA is repealed, I won’t have to worry about losing my ability to get pap smears or mammograms or basic health services if PP is closed down, I won’t have to worry about feeding my children, I won’t have to worry about the right to control my body, I won’t have to worry about getting shot in the street for walking while white or be found dead in a jail cell after failing to signal a lane change. These are not and will not be a concern for me, ever. “ In other words, his concerns for himself fall in the top levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and the concerns of many women and POC fall in the bottom levels. To put it another way, his problems are first world, white people problems that, when looked at in comparison to others seem trivial and shallow. This is where he and Propane Jane intersect. While John is pointed out how the outcome of the election really won’t impact him because of his station in life, Jane laid bare the lives of those who don’t enjoy that station. Many white progressives are not as self-reflective as John. They don’t see they are arguing for and from their own privilege. Pointing out their lack of self-awareness and politics of privileged self-interest is Jane’s specialty. While privileged white progressives are pissed bankers weren’t jailed because of the financial crisis, black families are worried about whether or not their child will be shot by the police, whether their unarmed teenager will be gunned down in the street, whether the rigged justice system will take their father away, whether or not their state government will give its wealthiest citizens more tax cuts while cutting social safety net programs, how to avoid being arrested or fined by a police force that uses the poor and disadvantaged to fund their department…

All of this is a perfect example of philosopher John Rawls’ “Difference Principle.” Rawls in his seminal work, “A Theory of Justice” laid out an ethical framework for social justice. One of the main tenets is his “Difference Principle.” In a nutshell, the Difference Principle says, “a law/rule/policy in society is only justified if it helps those disadvantaged as much or more than those advantaged.” For example, a tax cut would be just and fair if those at the bottom of the economic ladder are helped by it as much or more than those at the top. Any law/rule/policy that improved the position of the advantaged more than or at the expense of the disadvantaged would be unfair, unjust.

When it comes to ethics, I am a devout Rawlsian. “A Theory of Justice” is my ethical bible. When I apply it to the ideas and policy proposals of the current Democratic candidates for president, Hillary’s lined up more with Rawls than Bernie. It isn’t that Bernie’s or Joe's or Mayor Pete's ideas are not good or don’t have merit. Many do. However, their views operate from a top-down approach and this is the direct opposite of Rawls. I’m not saying Hillary’s ideas were perfect Rawlsian, they were not. However, more of her ideas operate from a bottom-up approach. This is what John Cole was getting at in his article. This is what Propane Jane gets at constantly with her tweets. Like it or not, there are two and only two major political parties in America. Currently, one of these two is batshit crazy. It appeals to and actively recruits angry, white, racist, misogynist, ignorant males. The other party, faults and all, has a very large base of the most disadvantaged in society. The reason I am a proud liberal and vote for Democratic candidates is that it is in the best position to help those who need it the most. As a fifty-eight-year-old white man, I have enjoyed many benefits for the mere facts I am white and male. Often, these benefits have come at the expense of people not like me. I can’t change what has happened, but I can change what does happen. I can and will push and vote for people and policies that improve the situations, opportunities, and lives of those who were not born with this privilege. In so doing, I have two choices: I can either take an approach that I know what’s best for those less fortunate; Or, I can listen to the people who have the most to lose, the most skin in the political game. If I opt for the first choice, I am perpetuating my white privilege. I am no better than any white progressive who tells POC voters they don’t know what they are doing. If I choose the second option, the consequence is not supporting Democratic candidates who are hell-bent on chasing the elusive white voter. I listened to every possible argument for Bernie and against Hillary in 2016, I am currently listening to every argument for Bernie/Joe/Pete versus Elizabeth/Kamala/Amy... When push comes to shove, every single one of these arguments takes a backseat to the social justice and ethical argument I’ve discussed. The future of the Democratic Party is with minorities. The social justice argument belongs to them, not white middle-aged men or white college students. The latter are important and their needs should be taken into consideration, but not in front or at the expense of the former. I believe in equality, justice, and fairness with no qualifications, no asterisks that somewhere in really small fine print says, “people of color, women, gays, etc. need not apply” or “are separate but equal” or any other bullshit. I can’t support any party or candidate whose main focus is white working class men, especially those who have voted against their own self-interest for decades because they don’t want “those people” to get something they don’t believe they deserve. Fuck them. They made their choices based largely on racism and bigotry. They had choices and options and fucked them up. Minorities and women, for the most part, have had neither. It’s about damn time they did. It’s about damn time we start listening to them.

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outcast-incel · 5 years ago

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First and foremost. This will be a reading blog. Pics, vids, memes etc will not be a priority for me. I may throw them in on occasion, but it won’t be often, if at all. I am not consistent, and I am not doing this as a major dedicated activity. I simply wanted to vent a bit, but have no one to vent with. Such is my life.

I guess I can start with a little about me. I’m me. I have tried on multiple occasions throughout my life to fit in with a stereotype or clique of some sort, but have never been successful in my attempts. The only thing that has remained consistent in my life is that pain is a constant companion. Luckily, I had the Army teach me how to embrace the suck and make it part of who I am.

I was raped as a kid, repeatedly, for more than a year. One of the neighbor’s uncles. I don’t know if it was a literal uncle, or someone who just said to call them uncle. Who knows. I was forced to play “the private game” with one of the neighbor boys for a very long time. I never told anyone about that until a year or so ago. I am now in my 30′s. It’s the reason that I am avidly against homosexuality in any form. I was physically and emotionally abused as well throughout my childhood until I got bigger than others and started fighting back. I had drug addict older siblings, and did not have my first friend until I was 10 years old. Needless to say, my developmental years were a bit traumatic.

I was constantly getting in trouble for lashing out (wonder why). It took me years to figure out that sometimes shit just happens, and you have to deal with it. I probably started to learn that at about the age of 17, but I am getting ahead here. I’ve been arrested on multiple occasions in my youth, but never did any jail time. I struggled with substance abuse the majority of my life (but am now 3 years sober) and various other forms of addiction as well. This included in my younger years sleeping with as many women as often as possible. It has been nearly a decade since I have been in a relationship now.

When I was in junior high and high school I went out of my way to try to belong anywhere. I hung out with the drug crowd, the gang banger crowd, the jocks, the popular kids, the nerds, the artsy types, heck I even tried to fit in with the religious crowd. It never happened for me, still hasn’t. I did come close when I spent nearly a decade with the Juggalos. They accepted me more than anyone ever did. However, like everything else though, over time that crowd was perverted by new folks who didn’t understand what it meant. Instead of being a family of outcasts, it became a competition of who could be the most hardcore. The younger generation started testing people to see if they were “really down”. It got old fast.

I joined the military when I was 20. I had to wait 2 years from my last arrest. I served as a Communications Specialist in the Signal Corps with the 4th Infantry Division. I served for 4 years and left as soon as they repealed don’t ask don’t tell. Obama did a very thorough job of destroying centuries of military history, tradition, and culture. I have a deep hatred for that man because of what he did to the armed forces and American culture as a whole. In all honesty though (hard truth), I wouldn’t have been able to last as a career anyway. My body was already breaking down with the rigors of military service, and it wouldn’t have lasted much longer. I now suffer from permanent injuries sustained near the end of my service, and they are only getting more and more painful as time progresses. Again, embrace the suck.

My alcoholism got really bad after spending 12 months in Iraq. It got out of control when I separated from the service. I worked hospital security for a number of years, then in the mines as a 3rd party contractor, hospital security again and finally caught my stride. I had a come to Jesus moment which changed my life. I quit drinking, and started going to church. I started college, bought a house, and a truck. I still struggle with addiction, but it is now food. It sucks because I would like to be a husband and father, but frankly, I’m a bit too emotionally detached for that to ever happen. Marriage is for the young and hopeful. Not the bitter and broken. It’s okay though, I won’t be the first person to die alone, and I certainly won’t be the last. Who knows. Maybe God will see fit to fully heal me and let me lead a normal family life. I like to think it’s a possibility.

I want to point out that all things considered, I think I turned out pretty well for my past. True I live alone, and only talk to a couple of friends once a month or so. However, I am not a criminal or a predator, I am a devout Christian, I love to do community service, and I have a deep love for my God, my Country, my family (we got over our childhood bullshit), and my friends (the few that I have). I used to enjoy the outdoors, but can’t anymore because of my injuries sustained in the service. I am now working in the tech industry. Figured I might as well use my military experience to my benefit. I am going to school for as much. I am at a point where I simply exist. Those who really know me look to me as a source of inspiration knowing that if I can keep going with my past experiences haunting me, they can as well.

The only thing that I ever wanted in life was to find a woman to spend the rest of my life with. To be in a relationship that is honest and loyal. That doesn’t seem to be a reality anymore. I’ve been engaged 4 different times, but every single one of my fiances ended up cheating on me. That was mostly my fault for the type of woman I used to pursue in my younger years. I will continue to have a small hope that it may happen, but as I mentioned earlier, I don’t see it happening at this point. I weigh well over 300 lbs. I’m bald, blind (not literally), and struggle with PTSD. I am emotionally and socially withdrawn. The only time I ever leave the house is to go to work, go shopping, or to visit family every few months. Maybe that will change now that I am working days for the first time in nearly a decade, but who knows. I do plan to go out more and enjoy the outdoors as much as I can. I can still go fishing, and camping so long as it’s easy terrain. Not much ladies to find there though.

I am very easy going, very sarcastic, and extremely empathetic when it is deserved, even though I hide that bit about me. I will say that I am also very apathetic as well. I don’t feel sorry for people and their situations most of the time since they are usually self inflicted. I am overly blunt and honest when asked a question and I love to argue. Truth be told, it isn’t usually much of an argument though. I almost always win. I am traditional. I think the reason for this is I hate what this world has become so I tend to look back. If I were to choose a period to live in, it would be either during the revolutionary days, the wild west days, or the days of the civil war. It seems that was the last time that people cared about their freedom instead of turning to the government to provide for them. People looked inward for strength or up to God. This country was founded on rebellion. Now, people rebel because they want to be controlled. The kicker is, most folks don’t even realize it.

There ya go. There is my introductory blog. I have now popped my blogging cherry. That is a little glimpse in to what has made me me. I think that a lot of my posts will be rants for the most part. It may seem like self pity at times, but I assure you, I don’t think highly enough of myself to pity myself. I feel that I deserve all the pain that is sent my way, because obviously it is meant to be. I honestly believe that I serve as hope for others that at least they’re not me. This detachment has made me excellent in leadership roles because I try to serve those under me instead of trying to only further my position. I go out of my way to help people so they may not have to experience the pain that has become my friend over the years. No one should have to be put through that.

God bless.

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shotfromguns · 6 years ago

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Good, long thread by @TheMittani on Twitter on “neoconfederacy” in the South:

if you ever wonder why i got politically 'radicalized' it's because i grew up in alabama as an atheist child of two biochemistry professors; at 17 i graduated and moved away forever. reminder: Alabama came within 1.7% of sending a known pedo to the senate~

any '13th dimensional chess' tweets about how the AL leg composed this abortion ban to provoke a court fight has never met an actual neoconfederate this is what they want 100%, it's a white supremacist aristo fertility cult and all the moves make sense when understood that way

source: i have been to an unironic country club debutante ball in dear old mountain brook and folks have no idea how much intergenerational wealth transfer has carried over from the days of slavery in that society's upper class

for context, when i was in high school there were three country clubs, maybe 20k citizens, and zero black students; every street is named after a civil war battle, and 'houses' there would be called mansions anywhere else

best public schools in the state though~

folks have no clue how rich and well-educated the ruling class in alabama is, going to mountain brook means if you don't get into one of the better ivys you're probably a bitter slacker like me legislation like this isn't from stupid hicks, it's the goal

southern aristos can be incredibly intelligent and well-traveled and are all the more dangerous politically because they are happy to play dumb in public with the aw-shucks jesus loving hick routine in order to quietly run an antebellum society and pit poor whites against blacks

it's almost comically effective, I do this stuff all the time in Eve - say laughably wrong things, act like a fool, and then it's much easier to outmaneuver people. The most dangerous enemy is one who is comfortable with being publicly underestimated.

I mean to say, 'ha ha eat my ass look at me I'm so great at spaceship games', please interpret my above tweet as evidence of hubris and ignorance rather than giving up an actual tactic I've employed so often it's been nicknamed the 'tee hee, flounce flounce' by my chief of staff

'I'm the fucking Mittani, I know everything in this game,' another good one wearing red shirts? stupid gimmick, keep doing it because it's a stupid gimmick, it's far better for our competitors/enemies to see me as a joke luv2club? tee hee, flounce flounce, same shit

anyhoo yeah it's the same dance, play god-fearing jesus lover to keep the poor whites on your side, maintain that patriarchy with the complicity of ruling class women who enjoy the economic benefits of neoconfederacy, and live over the mountain so no one spots all the lexuses

it's interesting to see the term neoconfederate finally get some use but it implies that there isn't already an actual working confederate states of america right in front of everyone's eyes that's been there since reconstruction, none of that shit is an accident

if you put 'hail hydra' on statues in every town in the region you don't have to bother saying 'hail hydra' or announce in print that you're down with hydra, everyone who lives there gets it

the issue is not being part of a traitorous conspiracy against the united states government (i mean hydra, not the neoconfederacy, ha ha!) the problem comes when you state it where those not in on it can hear you. Viz: ”Alabama newspaper editor calls for Klan return to ‘clean out D.C.’”

i kind of like the hydra analogy for the neoconfederacy, because all this shit - 'states rights', 'pro-life', 'voter fraud', these disparate causes are actually all the same cause: the ~lost~ cause

southern politics makes a lot more sense when viewed through the lens of pro/anti-confederacy politics; confederate society is based upon a ruling gentry descended from the cavaliers see generally https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albion%27s_Seed actual /aristos/ not merely rich people

so basically you have an entrenched aristocracy that traces their lineage back 10+ generations running a plantation society and fighting like fucking hell to maintain that privilege, privilege most people in the usa cannot even begin to imagine

generic usa high ~net worth individuals~ have nothing on the cunning and unity maintained by ancient proud cavalier aristocratic families in the south with shitloads of money who will do anything to protect the universe they and their forefathers have created (via slavery)

the whole 'the south will rise again' thing is a huge joke because the structure of the society immediately returned to functional slavery as soon as it could get away with it, the south already 'rose' after reconstruction, it's right in fucking the open

if they get away with the abortion thing, they'll gun for brown v board next; these people remember life before MLK and they have not forgotten or forgiven the civil rights movement those behind this aren't hicks, they very smart confederates acting like hicks to fool you.

many old privileged families come with a legacy and a purpose imposed on you from birth it's not a stretch of the imagination that the quest of a lot of these old aristo families is to restore the society to antebellum life and get their privileges (slavery) back

the civil war was only a few generations ago, these families have not forgotten and they have not let their children forget the monuments, the street named for war battles, that's why it matters still to them

southern aristos are pro-life because the whole point of the society is the poor whites fight the poor blacks, and restricting abortion = more labor and poverty to exploit by the gentry the goal of their flavor of white supremacy is about getting rich off slaves, not death camps

not that they have a problem with a death camp or three, it's difficult to communicate how utterly disposable the lives of people outside of their class are, this is a society whose rulers believe that god has anointed them to rule over their lessers

its not rocket science, you take a slaveholding landed gentry and take away their slaves and land (good!) that gentry is going to spend its time fanatically scheming to get its land and slaves back (bad, what we see in southern politics)

anyhoo what i'm saying is that this isn't about random kooks trying to put women 'in their place' (there's a bunch of them too, useful idiots) but part of a broad campaign across generations by a dispossessed cavalier nobility to get all their lost privileges (slavery) back

conveniently the rest of america doesn't have much of an entrenched aristo/gentry culture anymore so the maneuvers of the 'neo' confederates just look like random right wing lashing out rather than a deliberate series of moves to benefit the southern aristocracy

the reality of the modern confederacy reminds me a lot of 'The City and the City' in that it's clearly visible to those raised within it, yet its contour is completely alien to outsiders who don't know how to 'see' it the 'right' way.

shit like Roy Moore being a pedo but coming within 1.7% of winning a senate seat makes a buttload more sense than 'alabama voters will send anything not a democrat', Moore is a proud and loud confederate and Doug Jones is anti-confederate it's the confederacy - always.

Pro-life? Confederacy. State's Rights? Confederacy. Gun rights? Confederacy. Religious Freedom/Gay Cake Stuff? Confederacy. Anti-union? Confederacy. If you're a Cavalier or one of their foremen, it all fits~

Robert Caro basically spelled out in intricate detail how the confederacy works in his LBJ bios but particularly Master of the Senate, read these if you want a primer on actual power and its uses: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Years_of_Lyndon_Johnson

when LBJ shifted to supporting voting rights, the confederacy simply switched its support from the democrats to the republicans. it's a real thing and its moves make perfect sense once you grok the core motivations of the southern gentry and their henchmen~

you see this repeatedly through history where one side stops fighting after a victory and the other side loses but keeps trying to find ways to win, the Union torched the south and moved on, but the confederacy has /never stopped fighting/ using whatever means they have available

tl;dr "it's the confederacy, stupid" also explains those crazy 'obama is the antichrist' memes; if you're a confederate, a black president existing is against everything your flavor of pro-slavery jesus stands for

None of this thread really applies to Texas. I was born in Houston, moved to AL at 10; completely different culture in Texas. Going to rodeos, oil/cattle, science, ranching. When I say the 'South' I'm talking about the plantation society of the Cavaliers.

As a quick example of using the Lost Cause to understand Cavalier political behavior, Lindsey Graham's 'hypocrisy' makes perfect sense. He doesn't give a shit about spewing nonsense or lying to Yankees, all he cares about is Dixie. He's not dumb at all; the Union is his enemy.

Expanded May 17, 2019:

oh yeah and Mitch McConnell was born and raised in Alabama and then Georgia from 8yrs on, so heyoooo

look up how long jeff sessions family has been naming their kids after jefferson davis on his bio dixie is real; it's the confederacy, the political moves the cavaliers and their overseers are making on behalf of the lost cause as plain as day if you know what to look for

just gonna spend Friday night reading Albion’s seed to learn more fun ~cavalierfacts~ like how their royalist gentry is literally all one big interrelated family and coordinates retribution and uses debt to control the poor

“It is difficult to think of any ruling elite that has been more closely interrelated since the Ptolemies” holy lawl (it is a history insult as he’s basically calling the cavaliers a nest of outright incest, the Ptolemaic dynasty was Targaryen-style sibling marriage)

Hey guess what turns out the control of women is deeply ingrained in cavalier society because uh... kidnapping / human trafficking / sexual slavery and a massively skewed male to female ratio lovely people, these confederates

“These patterns did not develop by chance. Virginia’s great migration was the product of policy and social planning. Its royalist elite succeeded in shaping the social history of an American region partly by regulating the process of migration” (p 232) fucking hell it’s all here

May 22, 2019:

by req: another ‘understanding the confederacy’ thing, all the protest tweets saying “the cruelty is the point” are wrong, the point is opportunities for race-based policing (a la weed), disenfranchisement, reinforcing patriarchy, and more labor/babies to exploit + compliance

sure there’s a bunch of cruelty in there too but the whole thing is a means to the ends of rolling back the civil rights movement and restoring the structure of Dixie as the gentry/cavaliers prefer; the confederates may be slavers at heart but they’re not cartoon villains

(they're way worse)

In case I get hit by a bus, I currently think the concept of hegemonic liberty is the most misunderstood aspect of the cavalier mindset, so here’s three key pages from Albion’s Seed~

And the cavalier conception of condescension and deference as two sides of God’s hierarchy and order is a fracture point, that’s why incivility towards one’s ‘betters’ is so provocative - milkshakes would probably work over here, too

Also by hiding and lying about the existence of Dixie, they fragment their opposition into issue-based groups - pro-choice, gun control, voters rights, anti-racism - instead of each opposition group recognizing that they are fighting the same confederate foe

Not like they really hid that much, they had confederate flags flying over their capitols ever since the Civil War until recently, but the Union won the war and moved on, so folks think they’re fighting random bigots and not the CSA

May 23, 2019:

the lack of a concerted effort by the democratic party to win and develop victories in the south has allowed the bulwark of the RNC power to be unchallenged, if you erode the Dixie Wall in the Senate the republicans pretty much lose all their functional power

as the DNC is incompetent one doesn't need to rely upon them, state by state in Dixie voting rights and organization must be pushed to undermine the structure of confederate power, that's the fracture point, that and forcing their true nature as confederates into the open

I'll develop all this crap into more useful tactics on the upcoming blog thing but this is all just-in-case 'yo guys, if I get hit by a bus, take Albion's Seed, drive through Mountain Brook for proof of everything I'm saying (crestline doesn't count lawl) go fight hydra'

as someone will inevitably discover not EVERY street in Mountain Brook is named for civil war battles (there's a lot), the really old money lives on streets named for old british estates/towns + they're episcopalians (anglican 2.0) not baptists, of course

#US history #Slavery #Racism #Capitalism #Misogyny

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kateanddevinreview · 6 years ago

Text

London Has Fallen

In which Kate and Devin write a porno

Devin: Okay, so this movie is just Gerard Butler being a badass right? Is this the one with Denzel Washington? Or are neither of those things right.

Kate: It’s something like that.

Devin: Well, Butler showed up in the credits, but so did morgan freeman?

Kate: It’s a trifecta!!

Devin: Or maybe I'm just racist and mixed them up.

Kate: Or maybe it’s the two of them being badass together.

Devin: I made some comment the other day about minorities being underrepresented at the oscars or something and they asked what actors I think should win instead and I blanked on literally every minority actor I knew.

Kate: Hahahah. It’s still true though. And to be fair, could you name any white actors?

Devin: My brain got stuck on Tom Hardy and forgot literally every other actor on earth

Kate:I think he’s on tv now anyway. So far this movie is starting a bit slow. Do you think someone is going to be shot soon?

Devin: I find it weird that we are in....India?

Kate: I think we’re at an Indian wedding. Terrorist’s daughter is getting married

Devin: This is set up for motive?

Kate: Probs

Devin: The Phantom of the Opera and Harvey Dent go for a jog

Kate: Why are politicians always running? I don’t think they do that much

Devin: I think cause DC? it's an easy excuse to pan around the lawn

Kate: Ok well fine, coming at me with movie reasons. Wait, is this a sequel?

Devin: Is it? Was the last one just called "London"?

Kate: I was thinking Gerald saved a president in the last one?

Devin: She has crazy eyes

Kate: She does but she’s pregnant

Devin: I'll forgive it if we get through this movie without her vomiting.

Kate: She’s in like her third tri already so she really shouldn’t

Devin: Google says this is a sequel, to Olympus Has Fallen. Lots of stuff falling apparently

Kate: Knew it!!! I’ve seen that one too

Devin: Really? I'm guessing last time he saved President Harvey Dent from terrorists, wooed or impregnated his wife, and got hired for secret service or unfired from secret service

Kate: Unfired, if it’s what I’m thinking of

Devin: This time he'll save the Prime Minister from terrorists, see his kid born, and...uh. Be knighted? That's my guess

Kate: Seems like a totally logical guess to me. I’m betting he discovers the Prime Minister was murdered. I don’t think people are expected to attend state funerals?

Devin: I think it's cause his vice isn't available? I think normally this is the kind of thing they send him for. But I am basing that on episodes of Madam Secretary so who knows

Kate: New guess!! President is killed and Butler has to protect Freeman

Devin: Hmmm. Maybe. Is Freeman the Vice?

Kate: Yes. He said “Hello, Mr VP”

Devin: I'm missing like half of this dialogue, idk how

Kate: Cause it’s boring

Devin: I want splosions!

Kate: This baby melodrama music is not my favorite. Once again I feel like writing is letting us down?

Devin: Yeah. Be better hollywood!

Kate: Also important people shouldn’t just sign shit without looking at it

Devin: is this the fringe guy? No. Who is he? He's someone

Kate: I think? No?

Devin: Fringe guy is similar but different. Oh! The Magicians? Magicians teacher guy?

Kate: No, definitely not him

Devin: IMDBing....

Kate: “Most protected event on earth”= everyone will die

Devin: Yup. This cast listing order is stupid. Do we know British Gerard Butler's name?

Kate: You mean the head of the British security? Also no. Also I think they’re going to use kids?

Devin: Yes, British guy. Mr. Sands! From Limitless. Thanks wikipedia, for your superior cast list

Kate: Limitless. That’s right, I never watched much of that

Devin: I really liked the main guy and all the arts and crafts in that show. I'm sad it was cancelled. Also we should add the movie to our review list

Kate: Yes!

Devin: Splosion! I didn't think those guards were supposed to have real guns? Then again EMTs should definitely not have rocket launchers

Kate: Hahaha, yeah, those cops are definitely plants. It’s clearly a very well orchestrated attack

Devin: Pretty sure only america gives their cops guns. Also, rocket launcher

Kate: Wow I don’t care how this movie ends the world would not recover from this

Devin: Yeah Kate, it's fallen. Show. Us. The. Egg. It's not London unless I see the big glass egg and the ferris wheel

Kate: How did they know that one president wouldn’t leave on time?

Devin: Trackers? Or they caused the traffic?

Kate: No, he decided?

Devin: Motorcycles, a car's only weakness

Kate: Nice driving!

Devin: Don't injure civilians!

Kate: Ummmm, Devin. I think that ship has sailed.

Devin: He rammed the bad guy into a non bad guy car!

Kate: Oh fuck. Ok so who is the black lady? Is she the First Lady?

Devin: Voight buddy, you could have moved. He's the driver, she's the head of secret service

Kate: He was driving! It was a bullet! Give him some credit. Is she?

Devin: Yes. According to wikipedia

Kate: She’s not doing much. And she hunkered with the president?

Devin: Right? Stop flailing. Where is your gun, woman?

Kate: Oh god. That was brutal

Devin: That was very brutal

Kate: Why didn’t they park closer to the chopper?

Devin: Crashing in 3...2...oh ok nvm

Kate: Hahaha

Devin: He's got a cane so you know he's evil

Kate: So true

Devin: Moral of this movie: don't trust the handicapped

Kate: And yet, they didn’t detect a plan of this magnitude

Devin: Uh, did those people just have labels?

Kate: Yes. NSA and something else

Devin: Like, movie? Movie. We do not care

Kate: I’m assuming it will be important later?

Devin: Why is the lady not doing anything?

Kate: Nice, flares! I like flares. Why are they flying so low anyway?

Devin: I got distracted googling the secret service

Kate: Anything pertinent to share?

Devin: Apparently the director just does the boring shit, so idk why she's even here

Kate: Ummmm, I think the movie should end here?

Devin: Yes they all died. The End

Kate: No way anyone survived that. I call bullshit

Devin: Also, I assumed presidents would have like one guy their whole time in office? But apparently they hire someone new a lot. Oh she dead.

Kate: For the secret service?

Devin: As director. Like Obama had 2

Kate: I mean, that’s four years for each

Devin: Trump has already had 2. The first guy for like 2 months? 1 month?

Kate: Well, Trump does that a lot. He’s had like 8 communication directors

Devin: I just wonder if they choose to leave or if the president purposefully swaps them out

Kate: Also working for the president is really intense, so maybe you just burn out and have to leave

Devin: Makes sense. The local biker gang is here

Kate: I don’t think bikes make that noise. That is dumb

Devin: Yes. Also no one checked the wreck

Kate: At least we know from earlier scenes they are fast runners!

Devin: This looks like he put his manifesto on youtube

Kate: What point is there in entertaining this phone call? Also why does he care about one president?

Devin: Imagine if he called before they watched the video! Like 5 minutes earlier

Kate: Right? He should take the uniform too

Devin:

"Who is this?"

"It's...seriously? You didn't see my video?"

"h/o googling it"

"It's on youtube"

"yeah one sec, gotta sit through this 50 shade of grey trailer"

Kate: Ahhhhhhh Being hunted by motorbikes!! Oh no

Devin: Sure, that's subtle. Also this is a regular subway

Kate: I like that he was able to loot the body for weapons. Very practical

Devin: Jesus Gerard Butler. WTF? You went from zero to torture in no time

Kate: I know, little intense. Definitely running on adrenaline

Devin: This is the most 'murrican fucking movie. You cannot convince me that huge squads of racists didn't come out of this movie going "rah rah ‘murrica"

Kate: Oh god. Unfortunately yes

Devin: Although these talky bits suck. I'd rather have more fighting. Oh, thanks label, I really cared what time it was

Kate: Everyone is dead, that’s what this discussion is. I mean surrender and then ambush. How many people do they think there are? You’re not going to be professional right now? Weird

Devin: Blah blah blah. Bitch it was a wedding. Of course his family was there

Kate: How did you not know his family was there? It was a wedding. So dumb

Devin: What even is the point of that dialogue? There better be drugs in his water or something

Kate: What kind of shoddy intel are you all operating on? This is dumb. Do criticize if necessary. You have to teach them. Also off color jokes?

Devin: "You know what's most important Mike? Children. That's why we are never going to spend time with ours in any subsequent movie."

Kate: Of course it’s not your delta team.

Devin: Yeah why was that message not in code?

Kate: Zoom in!

Devin: Enhance! Your safe house has a fucking skylight!?

Kate: Seems like a pretty lame safe house. Oh this is gross

Devin: This movie is very gratuitous with its gore

Kate: It really is. And president you should not have done that. You are not almost out of this by any long shot

Devin: There must be a porno of this where they fuck right then

Kate: Did all of MI6 just die?

Devin: I'm not going to lie, that weird pirate porno you made us watch that one time is better than this movie

Kate: Haha! Oh pirates. Also my taste is terrible because I still enjoy this

Devin: I don't believe the hackers would make this basic of a mistake

Kate: No, me neither

Devin: Also driving seems like the quickest way to be spotted?

Kate: They kept everything under the radar but you didn’t notice this earlier?

Devin: Ok I guess at least the car is bulletproofed

Kate: How many of these terrorists are there supposed to be?

Devin: It's just the same 4 guys, they're really fast. They keep healing when they're off screen

Kate: Seems like an infinite supply. Mutants!! Also Mike is still somehow always faster

Devin: Now I want an action movie where 3/4 of the way through you realize he's been re-killing the same 5 guys over and over and surprise! it's really a fantasy/horror movie!

Kate: That would be so good. Change the whole game. I do oddly think this would make a good porno with very very little change

Devin: It's cause there's so much standing really close while breathing heavily and the plot is basically just as thin

Kate: Yeah pretty much. It’s a male romance novel

Devin: Also there have been.....5 women? in this entire movie. 6, I guess. Wife, mother, secret service director, beehive, assistant cop, MI6

Kate: Assistant cop?

Devin: Black lady?

Kate: I don’t remember her

Devin: She was in the bullpen with not!Fringe guy

Kate: Ok sure

Devin: Oh, ok, and random lady who had a text label I didn't read

Kate: There was the turning 30 woman and one lady head of state.

Devin: Still, none of these people shooting right now? There's like 20 guys in this scene!

Kate: Nope. Can’t have women in harm’s way unless they don’t have a choice. Also no lady terrorists

Devin: Only lady terrorists allowed are dead motivation ones

Kate: Also I’m subbing lady because it’s faster to type than woman

Devin: Agreed

Kate: Omg. Whispered “Mike.” Straight out of a romance novel

Devin: What? Are you ahead of me or did I miss it?

Kate: Maybe? The president whispered it

Devin: No! I must have missed the Mike whisper

Kate: He should be really tired by now. He didn’t have dinner!

Devin: "Hear that? My boyfriend is coming"

Kate: He really should just kill the president. It doesn’t make sense not to

Devin: There is so much manly eye contact and face holding

Kate: So much

Devin: Like I'm pretty sure almost this exact sequence happened in Outlander

Kate: In the porn there would be a scene where the president seduced him, Mike walked in on it, and then they have a threesome

Devin: With the bad guy?

Kate: Yup

Devin: That seems like it would be out of place plot wise. Would the bad guy turn himself in or something?

Kate: No. Just random sex that doesn’t make sense

Devin: Weird. The sex should make sense!

Kate: It’s for real a thing that happens in porn, you get whiplash. Oh god. This is lame. Really?

Devin: One punch where he runs all the way across the screen. So stupid

Kate: Did we learn who the brit mole was?

Devin: Nope. They hacked the police station I think? Damn! Wheelchair guy didn't even get to make a speech about how bad America is. This movie is not even pretending to care about America's mistakes

Kate: Why didn’t he just shoot everyone?

Devin: Out of bullets?

Kate: He hasn’t run out of guns until now

Devin: What even is this dialogue right now?

Kate: Really dumb

Devin: "You fuck with America? OH HELL NO. WE BAT SHIT. WE WILL FUCKING MURDER ALL Y'ALL."

Kate: America’s not even 500. Witty banter!

Devin: "EVEN OUR PRESIDENT WILL PICK UP A GUN FOR MURDER TIME"

Kate: Also he’s not dead because you haven’t killed him?

Devin: Yeah you just punched him a bit and talked nonsense

Kate: Once again, another thing they wouldn’t have survived.

Devin: I feel like the porno version of this has them go back to their wives at the end with lots of meaningful looks and sly smiles between the two main dudes. Like "yeah, we'll do this again next mission"

Kate: Oh no! But yes probably. Why was there a lock in an elevator?

Devin: Is the president the only one alive from this whole thing? They would definitely make out in this elevator

Kate: I think one other world leader survived? There was a missing link to the terrorist?

Devin: I guess?

Kate: Who sent a fucking video?

Devin: Honestly this plot is stupid Yeah he's def the mole. Also he's running away? Like he obviously did it

Kate: Are we supposed to care about him or her? Because I do not

Devin: They would have had sex earlier in the porno

Kate: Yeah. It would have made more sense. Just kill him already

Devin: Also she would have just arrested him. I feel like the porno would have less murder

Kate: It’s weird that normally I complain about too much sex? But this would just be better as a porn

Devin: Yeah our review is basically "this would have made a better porno"

Kate: How would you have found him?

Devin: Who hears "look out your window" and looks up at the ceiling? Oh maybe that's what the missing link was?

Kate: Also the VP does not have the authority to call that type of strike

Devin: What is this 10 angled shot explosion? Ok, we've got a baby

Kate: So it’s been at least a few weeks

Devin: No prime minister but I didn't realize it was his funeral so I feel like the president is close enough. Now knighthood

Kate: Sure. They don’t know how emails work? Re: is for replies

Devin: "Many people would say this is our fault, but we're america so fuck those people. we'll kill those people."

Kate: “Commence spending no time with my kid”

Devin: In the porno version we end instead with a mirror of the earlier DC lawn scene, with them sitting on a bench watching their wives/kids, and the pres saying something like "still want to quit?" and Butler saying "and leave you, sir? Never." And then meaningful eye contact. Roll credits.

Kate: Hahahah

Devin: Okay, so scores

Kate: Yes. Scores.

Devin: 3/10 for the movie, 6/10 for the porno

Kate: I go a little higher movie? Like 4.5 for the movie. 6 for porno though. I think we can agree that no porn should ever rank higher than 7

Devin: Yeah. Like, even amazing porn is still porn

Kate: Ummmm tropes? So many, “family as our motivation”

Devin: “America is terrible and we never learn anything”?

Kate: Which is so hypocritical

Devin: “One man assumes command of literally every other character without argument”

Kate: Hahahaha. So like 7 on the tropes? They all fit the plot really well

Devin: Yeah, I mean it had a very particular niche and it played to it

Kate: Exactly

Devin: I'm going to give the title an 8/10. Catchy and accurate

Kate: I can agree. Thematic

Devin: London did pretty much fall. Like an old lady in a Life Alert commercial

Kate: Better than Olympus has fallen

Devin: Yeah, plus how fucking pretentious is it to call the white house "olympus"?

Kate: Exactly

Devin: What would the porn title be? I feel like they're usually puns?

Kate: Pun for sure. London may fall but our guys stay up

Devin: kind of long

Kate: It could be the tagline?

Devin: Oh yeah, good tagline. My brain gave me "Banging Private Ryan" which does not fit but is almost certainly a movie that exists

Kate: Hahahahaha. Banging president something? Whatever his name was

Devin: No idea, I called him Harvey Dent the whole movie. London Goes Down?

Kate: London laid down? Cause laid. Get it?

Devin: H/o I have to see if there is a real porn title for this. NSA people monitoring my internet searches, I'm really sorry

Kate: Gives them some spice! A story to take home

Devin: Top result for "London Has Fallen Porn Title" is:

"London Has Fallen movie condemned as racist 'terrorsploitation' "

"London Has Fallen is gun-barrel porn"

Kate: Whelp. Yep. I feel bad for enjoying it?

Devin: "London Has Fallen Is The Worst Film About Our City Ever"

Kate: Oh no it was a piece of shit for sure. Super fucking racist

Devin: “Blowing London.” That's my official submission

Kate: Nice! “Blowing London” is great. I thought you’d actually found it.

Devin: Ok, any parting words?

Kate: It was a dumb racist movie that I feel guilty for enjoying anyway? Which means we should have more action movies made with better plots and motivation. And female representation!

Devin: Or more action movies that are just porn

Kate: Or that. What about you? Parting words?

Devin: If you want to see a movie where Gerard Butler brutally murders everyone, this is it. Or, you know, go watch 300, it is less awful.

Kate: So true.

#kate and devin review #london has fallen #murrica

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easyobsession · 7 years ago

Text

dwts25 cast announcement (aka lo is STILL recapping this crap?)

Jesus lord help us all, the shit storm covered in glitter is back for its 25th season and while I’m highly doubtful I’ll post weekly because I’m still upset over last season and pretty fed up with a certain pro at the moment, I’m feeling generous and somewhat indebted to tradition to at least do a post on the cast reveal.

Wow, that was a long ass sentence.

*A quick sidenote before we start- you guys, I actually know who all except 4 of these people are!! This might be a record. Good on you, ABC.

The Guys

DEREK FISHER with pro partner SHARNA BURGESS

Speaking of people I don’t know… He’s an athlete, what do you expect? He used to be a basketball player, right? Does he still play? Was he any good? They got Kobe Bryant to send a message, but is that because of Derek or just ABC’s connections? I have no clue. Instant judgment says he won’t be great.

DREW SCOTT with pro partner EMMA SLATER

Who doesn’t love the Property Brothers? When I first heard about Drew as a possible contestant, I wasn’t shocked. He and his brother seem pretty easygoing and willing try almost anything- and out of the two I think Drew is a little less likely to worry about the stereotypical possibility of looking “less masculine.” I think Drew could be good- he’s insanely tall, which might work against him, but he seems really excited and I bet he works hard. I’m excited about him.

FRANKIE MUNIZ with pro partner WITNEY CARSON

Loved Malcolm in the Middle. And Agent Cody Banks, with Hillary Duff? AND BIG FAT LIAR, WITH AMANDA BYNES BEFORE SHE LOST HER MIND? And that Disney Channel movie (back when they were DCOMs) where he was in a kid in a wheelchair that raced in a soapbox derby? God, what a throwback. Apparently since then he’s gotten pretty into racing for real, however I don’t see us having another James Hinchcliff on our hands. Even in the 2 second intro they did on GMA he looked stiff and awkward. I don’t see this lasting long at all. Shame.

JORDAN FISHER with pro partner LINDSAY ARNOLD

Forget Hamilton, this boy is from the Disney Channel! Liv and Maddie, anyone? TEEN BEACH MOVIE? It’s Seacat, y’all! He’s gonna kill it and it’s gonna be so fun to watch. I think he and Lindsay (who shall from this moment on be known this season as LindsAY, not to be confused with fellow contestant LindsEY) will be a great team with a lot of energy. He won’t win though, due to the Disney Channel curse. In true Disney star tradition though, he will likely get second place. (Somewhere in the distance Kyle Massey, Zendaya, and Corbin Bleu are having a Disney Kid/DWTS Runners Up club meeting. Meanwhile Sabrina Bryan is nearby plotting to burn down ABC headquarters.)

NICK LACHEY with pro partner PETA MURGATROYD

First One Tree Hill, now this. The man is out to conquer the world. I don’t think he’ll be as good as Drew (his brother, not the other contestant this season) and I almost think his wife will outdo him by just a hair. That said, I don’t see him being awful. Along the lines of boyband members, I can see him maybe a little behind the others like Nick Carter and Lance Bass, and probably not nearly as good as Wanya Morris or Joey Fatone. I think Nick will start off okay and slowly work his way up, but I don’t think it’ll be a fast or easy process. But as long as he and Vanessa don’t bitch and moan about their spouses like Carlos and Alexa PenaVega did, I’ll be happy.

TERRELL OWENS with pro partner CHERYL BURKE

It’s Terrell like Cheryl, not Tuh-rell. He is (was?) in the NFL. That sums up my knowledge of this man. I assume he was (is?) pretty good from the way people talk about him? He looks pretty graceful and I doubt they’d give Cheryl anyone too shitty since it’s such a big deal she’s back. I don’t know. The only football knowledge I have is from Friday Night Lights. Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t fuck it up in the ballroom.

The Girls

BARBARA CORCORAN with pro partner KEO MOTSEPE

I actually have watched quite a bit of Shark Tank since Robert Herjavec’s season, so I know Barbara! She’s 68, so good for her, though since she’s with Keo we know she won’t last long. Though I doubt she’ll be much good, I know Barbara is very spunky and look forward to seeing her.

DEBBIE GIBSON with pro partner ALAN BERSTEN

One of the 4 I don’t know. Apparently she had a hit in the 80s that I’ve never heard of and she’s currently battling Lyme disease, which I also know nothing about. But after a quick trip to the trusty Mayo Clinc’s website, I learned that Lyme disease is basically a bacterial disease transmitted by deer tick bites (check yourself, kids!), with symptoms that can include a rash, flu-like symptoms, joint pains, and neurological problems. So Debbie has a lot going on. All of that said, I can see her being a bit like one of the higher-skilled housewives when it comes to skill- not epic, but not too bad.

LINDSEY STERLING with pro partner MARK BALLAS

I think I’m rooting for her to win. Of course we’ve all seen her- she’s performed on the show multiple times (Maks and Meryl, week 3 Foxtrot. Look it up.), She’s cute as button and apparently she and Mark have known each other for a while. I’m excited. I think she’ll do well. It’s gonna be weird seeing her dance with a person though instead of her violin.

NIKKI BELLA with pro partner ARTEM CHIGVINTSEV

I’m a WWE girl, so I know Nikki. Since the proposal at Wrestlemania in April she’s taken time off from wrestling, but she’s still around starring on the WWE reality show Total Divas as well as the spinoff Total Bellas, starring her and her twin sister Brie. Whether or not she’ll be any good is a huge question mark, because while being in amazing physical shape, obviously wrestling has a little less finesse than dancing. Fellow WWE superstar Chris Jericho competed in season 12 with Cheryl and came in 6th (he wasn’t great, and he’ll gladly tell you that himself), however I think Nikki being a woman gives her an advantage over the male wrestlers. The guys in WWE don’t have to worry about being sexy (though some are- Seth Rollins, call me) but the girls, while times have progressed and are now seen as equals in terms of talent, do have to be a little more graceful, so to speak. All of this being said, I’m not sure how well she’ll do. But I’m excited to find out.

SASHA PIETERSE with pro partner GLEB SAVCHENKO

I didn’t watch Pretty Little Liars, but I know who she is. Another one too cute for words. I hope she does well.

VANESSA LACHEY with pro partner MAKSIM CHMERKOVSKIY

I don’t really know what Vanessa has done aside from being a wife/mom and a TRL VJ back in the day. But she looks like she can shake her booty and I think she’ll do well with Maks. I can see them being a lot of fun. I also think she and Nick seem less timid than Carlos and Alexa, and I’m crossing my fingers that they understand the concept of the show is to win with your partner, not cry about how much you wish could be dancing with your husband instead (because that’s NOT HOW IT WORKS, ALEXA). So I’m pumped. I also hope the troupe is prepared to open the DWTS daycare for all of these children that will need watching while the mommies and daddies go to work.

VICTORIA ARLEN with pro partner VAL CHMERKOVSKIY

The final cast member I do not know. I looked up her story though, and I can see why Val has been so pumped about her. She seems AMAZING. For those of you also in the dark, here’s some info I’m copying from the internet:

“At the age of 11, Victoria developed two rare conditions and lost the ability to speak, eat, walk and move. She slipped into a vegetative state in which recovery was unlikely. She spent nearly 4 years "locked" inside her own body, completely aware of what was going on, just unable to move or communicate. Doctors believed there was little hope of survival and recovery was unlikely. In 2010, Victoria began the nearly impossible fight back to life. She learned how to speak, eat, and move all over again. She competed in the 2012 Summer Paralympics held in London as a member of Team USA and she won four medals: one gold and three silver. In April 2015, she made the transition from professional athlete to sportscaster and joined ESPN as one of the youngest on air talents hired by the company. In April of 2016, she defied yet another odd and learned to walk after spending nearly a decade paralyzed from the waist down.”

And she’s TWENTY-TWO, Y’ALL. Let’s all take a quick moment to examine our lives- WE’RE ALL FAILURES. LOOK AT THIS GIRL. SHE’S A REAL LIFE SUPERHERO. Also one of the ones I’m excited to see and rooting for (despite some shit I won’t get into. Check my twitter. It’s there somewhere).

The Troupe and Pro Decisions

TIME TO POP BOTTLES, Y’ALL. YOU KNOWN DAMN WELL WHY I’M CELEBRATING. However I’m also hesitantly holding back bc until the first episode airs and a little blonde man doesn’t magically come out dancing with his celebrity partner along the lines of Michelle Obama, Ellen DeGeneres, Christ himself, I won’t be 100% convinced we’ll get such a huge season without God’s Gift To Movement. (#SQUEREK- MY VALDAYA FAM CAN ENJOY THAT THROWBACK. YOU’RE WELCOME.)

On a completely different topic, Mark is back. Woot! With his creativity and LindsEY’s talent with a violin, I’m super pumped to see what he comes up with.

Also Alan has been upgraded to a pro. Yay Alan!

I’m sad Sasha isn’t a pro this season because we all love him and he’s done so great with his past partners, but I think a large part of him being a pro depends on if they can find someone that balances will with his height. So I’m sad, but happy he’ll be around at least on troupe.

On a similar note though, who cares about height? Sasha is clearly a great teacher. Keo, however, though I’ve got mad love for the man, has proven time and time again that he needs some time on troupe to work on his teaching skills. I realize Barbara won’t ever be the next Laurie Hernandez, but regardless. I’m not happy they moved him up.

I’m also sad that a few favorites won’t be around like Karina and Tony. (dude, Karina went from this to attempting to date Chad from Jojo’s season of the Bachelorette on that new E! show. What the hell happened to our girl?)

The Judges

As far as I know they’re the same. Yippee -.- but guess what I’m pissed about y’all! SHIRLEY BALLAS IS JOINING THE JUDGING PANEL OF STRICTLY COME DANCING. WHICH IS NOT DWTS. WHY DO THEY GET HER AND WE’RE STUCK WITH CARRIE ANN AND JULES? What sick form of bullshit is this? I’ve said before I want both of Mark’s parents on the panel, plus Anna Trebunskaya (who just had a baby boy- CONGRATULATIONS ANNA!!!) and if Maks is competing and can’t judge, then Bruno, because I love his insanity and inappropriate innuendos. So damn you, Strictly!!

Predictions (in no specific order)

EARLY EXIT/THE BILLY RAY SCHOOL OF DANCE: Barb, Derek, Frankie

MIDDLE OF THE ROAD/BE GLAD YOU DON’T HAVE TO LEARN 46 NUMBERS FOR THE FINALE: Nikki, Terrell, Nick, Sasha, Debbie

GOING ALL THE WAY/STILL FINDING GLITTER IN YOUR DRAIN 6 MONTHS LATER: Jordan, LindsEY, Vanessa maybe, Victoria, Drew

For the final 3? As of lately I’m questioning damn near everything in my life, but I’ll give it a shot. Final 3 LindsEY, Jordan, Victoria. I’d normally guess Jordan for second, but with these girls I’ll guess Jordan 3rd and…. gah, this is hard. I want to say LindsEY will win, but I almost think Victoria will get it. I have a feeling this will flip-flop a lot. Okay, final guess pre-premiere is Jordan 3rd, LindsEY 2nd, and Victoria wins. But I’m not 100%.

Whew. Thank god I’m finally done writing this. If you actually read the whole thing, god love ya.

I’m still on social media @lauthom93 and love a good discussion, debate, or argument- not just about DWTS but anything at all, so hit me up there or right here on tumblr.

Back to my regularly scheduled madness. You know I’m sending love and gestures kids shouldn’t mimic.

Lo.

#dwts 25 #dancing with the stars #dancing with the stars season 25 #valdaya #opinion piece #lo recaps things

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i-like-your-genitalia · 7 years ago

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You are going to kill me... buuut all 200 questions? I'm keeping you busy and thinking about your life

200: My crush’s name is: Jennifer  

199: I was born in: a hospital? (Jks 1998) 

198: I am really: funny  

197: My cellphone company is: Lebara 

196: My eye color is: boring ol’ brown  

195: My shoe size is: a ladies 9 

194: My ring size is: I actually don’t know 

193: My height is: 5'10  

192: I am allergic to: nothing surprisingly  

191: My 1st car was: 1998 Subaru Legacy (the station wagon) 

190: My 1st job was: Checkout Worker 

189: Last book you read: The Accident Man 

188: My bed is: a king  

187: My pet: I don’t have one atm  

186: My best friend: Anushka  

185: My favorite shampoo is: I don’t have one (but I like anything coconut or tropical scented) 

184: Xbox or ps3: don’t care  

183: Piggy banks are: lit 

182: In my pockets: I’m a girl, only 20% of my clothes have pockets big enough to put anything in  

181: On my calendar: “Spotify Premium runs out on the 27th of August" 

180: Marriage is: Not married  

179: Spongebob can:  

178: My mom: is awesome  

177: The last three songs I bought were? Whatever I listened to last on Spotify?  

176: Last YouTube video watched: review on Aztec clay face mask  

175: How many cousins do you have? 4 step cousins and then 6 blood related cousins  

174: Do you have any siblings? Just a younger sister  

173: Are your parents divorced? Nah they still together and in love  

172: Are you taller than your mom? Only just  

171: Do you play an instrument? I used to play the piano  

170: What did you do yesterday? Worked

[ I Believe In ] 

169: Love at first sight: kinda  

168: Luck: yes  

167: Fate: not really  

166: Yourself: sometimes  

165: Aliens: yes  

164: Heaven: yes  

163: Hell: no  

162: God: yes  

161: Horoscopes: I mostly enjoy the zodiac memes and compatibility and personality horoscopes  

160: Soul mates: yes, but I believe you have more than one  

159: Ghosts: yes  

158: Gay Marriage: big yes  

157: War: nope 

156: Orbs: it would be cool but I’m neutral  

155: Magic: yes

[ This or That ] 

154: Hugs or Kisses: Hugs  

153: Drunk or High: Drunk  

152: Phone or Online: Online  

151: Red heads or Black haired: Red heads  

150: Blondes or Brunettes: Blondes  

149: Hot or cold: Hot  

148: Summer or winter: Summer  

147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn  

146: Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate  

145: Night or Day: Day  

144: Oranges or Apples: Oranges  

143: Curly or Straight hair: Curly  

142: McDonalds or Burger King: Maccas  

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk Chocolate  

140: Mac or PC: Mac 

139: Flip flops or high heels: High Heels  

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor  

137: Coke or Pepsi: Coke 

136: Hillary or Obama: OBAMA 

135: Burried or cremated: Cremated  

134: Singing or Dancing: Dancing  

133: Coach or Chanel: Chanel  

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are they? 

131: Small town or Big city: Big city  

130: Wal-Mart or Target: I haven’t been to either  

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller  

128: Manicure or Pedicure: Manicure  

127: East Coast or West Coast: East Coast  

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: this is too cruel to answer  

125: Chocolate or Flowers: Chocolate  

124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney  

123: Yankees or Red Sox: um don’t care

[ Here’s What I Think About ] 

122: War: It’s expensive and unnecessary and should be a last resort. It’s not worth the lives lost, people injured and relocated. The monetary cost is ridiculous and it barley solves anything. It cause more issues and potentially more wars

121: George Bush: did 9/11 

120: Gay Marriage: It’s actually crazy how long and how much effort it took to get this accepted. And I just hope this right isn’t taken away!  

119: The presidential election: Donald Trump and Pence need to die or be locked up forever, I don’t even understand how anyone thought that Hilary Clinton would be worse.  

118: Abortion: Pro-choice for the win  

117: MySpace: I wasn’t old enough for this  

116: Reality TV: my guilty pleasure tbh  

115: Parents: I love my parents and they are good to me. But it would be great if they could be less homophobic.  

114: Back stabbers: I don’t know why people feel the need to intentionally hurt and embarrass someone, especially someone who isn’t prepared for it or trusts you  

113: Ebay: I don’t really use eBay  

112: Facebook: I use it to tag my non tumblr friends in memes and to stalk people  

111: Work: I’m sick of my job but I’m having to stick it out for now.  

110: My Neighbors: They are seasonal but if their kids could not move and rearrange the bedroom at the ass crack of dawn that would be fantastic  

109: Gas Prices: New Zealand, especially in the towns. Gas prices are so high. Spain isn’t so bad 

108: Designer Clothes: I’d rather have more clothes than one designer one  

107: College:  

106: Sports: I have zero hand eye coordination and therefore hate sports! But I will watch the Olympics  

105: My family: They are cool for the most part  

104: The future: is scary and it makes me wanna throw up if I think too much about it

[ Last time I ] 

103: Hugged someone: like a week ago  

102: Last time you ate: I’m eating chocolate right now  

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: my grandparents and my cousins today  

100: Cried in front of someone: it’s been forever  

99: Went to a movie theater: like a good 6-8 months ago 

98: Took a vacation: ummm like 4 months ago  

97: Swam in a pool: yesterday  

96: Changed a diaper: not since my babysitting days  

95: Got my nails done: literally before I left New Zealand so 5 months ago 

94: Went to a wedding: it’s been years  

93: Broke a bone: never actually broken anything in my body  

92: Got a peircing: I got my ears pieced when I was 12  

91: Broke the law: Probably when I was driving, speeding or something but nothing I've been charged with lmao 

90: Texted: like a couple of hours ago

[ MISC ] 

89: Who makes you laugh the most: my sister  

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: having consistently good home cooked meals  

87: The last movie I saw: probably shrek  

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: being back in New Zealand! Or doing some travelling  

85: The thing im not looking forward to: working  

84: People call me: gay 83: The most difficult thing to do is: be honest  82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: I actually haven’t  

81: My zodiac sign is: Leo  

80: The first person i talked to today was: my girlfriend  

79: First time you had a crush: the first crush I remember, I was in year 4 (so 8 years old) and it was on this boy named Joseph  

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: I’m good at hiding things tbh  

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: my sister when my mum and dad were talking shit  

76: Right now I am talking to: my sister and my friends from New Zealand  

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Hairdressing tho I kinda would like to do pre school/nursery/kindergarten teaching  

74: I have/will get a job: currently working as front of house at a little supermarket  

73: Tomorrow: I’m working and doing house work 

72: Today: I slept and then worked  

71: Next Summer: I will hopefully be enjoying the sunshine  

70: Next Weekend: Working yet again and having dinner with my grandparents  

69: I have these pets: Definitely a cat, and also a dog  

68: The worst sound in the world: chalk or finger nails on a chalkboard  

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: myself  

66: People that make you happy: my sister, my friends and my girlfriend  

65: Last time I cried: when I watched beauty and the beast  

64: My friends are: absolutely incredible, I don’t deserve them 

63: My computer is: I don’t have one anymore  

62: My School: I’m not in school  

61: My Car: I don’t have a car atm  

60: I lose all respect for people who: are snakes  

59: The movie I cried at was: beauty and the beast 

58: Your hair color is: brown and boring  57: TV shows you watch: Atm limitless, shooter, Shetland, Rewatching Criminal Minds, AHS and Black Mirror 

56: Favorite web site: boohoo.com or iherb  

55: Your dream vacation: A cruise or a historical/relaxed tour of the ancient world  

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: in a tie between slamming my fingers in a car door or when I got a virus (it’s a really bad version of food poisoning) and I actually thought I was gonna die.  

53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium to well done  

52: My room is: relatively clean and currently got that minimal plant theme going  

51: My favorite celebrity is: Dua Lipa  

50: Where would you like to be: with @dysfunctionalgroup 

49: Do you want children: yeah one day  

48: Ever been in love: yes  

47: Who’s your best friend: Anushka  

46: More guy friends or girl friends: it used to be a balance but now mostly girl friends  

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: cute underwear and a good nights sleep  

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: 

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: yes 

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: mentally but it’s not written down anywhere  

41: Have you pre-named your children: no, but I have some names I really like lined up  

40: Last person I got mad at: my sister  

39: I would like to move to: the Uk or NZ  

38: I wish I was a professional:

[ My Favorites ] 

37: Candy: Reece’s pieces or skittles  

36: Vehicle: Kinda want a Range Rover or a Land Rover but in the old style. Or a classic car 

35: President: Obama 

34: State visited: ive never been to America  

33: Cellphone provider: Lebara  

32: Athlete: my bio teacher, she played for a big women’s netball team  

31: Actor: Jensen Ackles  

30: Actress: Gal Gadot  

29: Singer: Dua Lipa 

28: Band: The Internet

27: Clothing store: h&m or boohoo 

26: Grocery store: I don’t have one  

25: TV show: Brooklyn 99 

24: Movie: I have too many  

23: Website: this hell hole 

22: Animal: Cats or Goats  

21: Theme park: I’ve only been to Disney  

20: Holiday: Christmas and Halloween  

19: Sport to watch: Gymnastics  

18: Sport to play: None 

17: Magazine: who reads magazines anymore  

16: Book: the Mysterious Benedict Society  

15: Day of the week: Friday  

14: Beach: as long as it’s sandy I’m cool  

13: Concert attended: J Cole 

12: Thing to cook: Pizza and Sweet and Sour Pork  

11: Food: Cheesburgers  

10: Restaurant: Any that sell food I like  

9: Radio station: ZM

8: Yankee candle scent: most of them

7: Perfume: Dolce and Gabbana, Floral Drops

6: Flower: forget me nots

5: Color: Green

4: Talk show host: don’t have a fave

3: Comedian: don’t have a fave

2: Dog breed: Border Collie

1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Guess you’ll never know

#all done #my asks #answered asks #ask me anything

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politicsiscomplicated · 7 years ago

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Instead of Punching Nazis, Steal Their Target Audience From Them

If America today is analogous to Nazi Germany, the people I'm arguing against act like we're in 1938, with annexations of our neighbors and Kristallnacht looming near. We're not. We're not even in 1933 at the beginning of the dictatorship yet. We're still somewhere in the 20s. The Nazis are clearly, obviously evil, going around attacking people and screaming about how the Jews/liberals/non-whites/foreigners/etc. are ruining the country, and even have some friends in high places. But most of the country still isn't willing to vote for them. We the enemies of Naziism, all of us from ultra-conservatives like Orrin Hatch all the way to leftists and progressives like many of you my friends are, aren't in the place of some underground resistance movement fighting a guerrilla campaign against the omnipresent Nazi menace. We are right now all in the place of the other political parties that fucking failed to fix Germany by peaceful means after WW1. And there are a lot of disgruntled but politically detached people out there who aren't Nazis but might be persuaded to vote for Nazis if we don't get to them first with better ideas.

We saw this last year when millions of disgruntled former Obama voters and millions of voters who said they normally don't vote at all came out to support a notoriously incompetent asshole who stumbled into being the first major presidential candidate since Wilson to receive the endorsement of the Klan and not disavow it. Never forget that Hitler didn't gain power through coercion like Mussolini or revolution like Franco. He was the leader of a major political party, elected partially because of terrorism, but also largely because his party was able to convince the public that they could solve their problems. The Nazis and their ideological cousins in the alt-right are competing with us now to win over the people who are, frankly, ignorant of or disinterested in politics and therefore vulnerable to Nazis winning them over by presenting their mix of paranoia and outright lies nicely.

The people we are competing with them over, or ought to be, are the people I've heard ranting my entire life — and I know, any of you New Englanders, that you have heard them too, and are probably related to some of them — about "reverse racism" and "handouts", and how the Clintons are secret murderers, and so on blah blah blah. They're wrong, and they don't understand what we're talking about. But that's not how we respond to them. Instead, we respond to them by writing them off as unfixably hateful and accuse them of lying rather than not understanding. We push them away into the waiting hands of Nazi propagandists. Nazis, like the toxic right-wing talkshow media, respond to them by egging them on to embrace and use their anger, Emperor Palpatine-style. Any chance we give the Nazis to portray themselves as the victim of leftist aggression is another voter who, when it is time for our equivalent of the 1932 elections, will go to the polls and support the Nazis even though they may not personally be a Nazi.

But the propaganda is out there, and the rallies are happening, and they have an audience. Clearly something must be done. So what is to be done about the Nazis themselves? How can we possibly avoid seeming to engaging them as equals, which would give them the same false balance legitimacy currently enjoyed by creationists and anti-vaxers and climate change deniers? Not through preemptive violence. We should certainly be willing to fight in self-defense, or in the defense of another we can help, but remember, there is already a narrative out there of "violent leftists" who need "law and order" brought down upon them. The president himself buys into and spreads this. We need to make him look ridiculous.

When the NAACP took up the case of Rosa Parks, rather than any of the other people who defied bus segregation before her, it was because they and Parks understood how easily-swayed people are by victim-blaming. When a bad thing happens to someone, it seems to be a baked-in human instinct to examine the victim to see why they "provoked" something bad, rather than examining what's wrong with the offender to make them think victimizing someone could possibly be okay. They sought out a person about whom the fewest negative things could be said. This is an effective tactic. It anticipates and shuts down the stupid but popular arguments people are drawn to. By showcasing the most clear-cut, inarguable cases of injustice, that bulk of disengaged public sees that a system they were previously indifferent to ought to be actively changed or destroyed. By fighting only defensively, I believe we can preempt any attempt by the Nazis to use that tactic on us. Make it clear that the victim of an act of racist or other bigoted violence did nothing to provoke it, and you turn the public's outrage on the offender, and maybe even on the ideology that encouraged the violence.

It is also worth remembering at this point that, as Jon Stewart put it, the bias of the mainstream media is towards sensationalism, conflict, and laziness. They want someone to get pundits enraged at because enraged pundits get them viewers or listeners or readers, and viewers or listeners or readers get them ad revenue. Let someone make a heinous speech and the news cycle will be about what a fucking piece of shit that person is. Punch someone making a heinous speech, and the news cycle will be fake-balance arguments about how there's "anger on both sides".

So what about "fighting" metaphorically, by disrupting the lives of Nazis (or Nazi-allies)? Public shame will do something, right? Well, maybe, if you get the right person. A friend did a back-of-the-envelope-type estimate using some demographic data about this. If we assume for the sake of argument that every alt-rightist is a white American man, distributed randomly among all white American men in general appearance, and we have pictures of every single alt-rightist based on estimates of how many of them there are, and we only make mistakes 1% of the time in matching the alt-rightists' faces to the faces of all white American men, the number of innocent people we falsely identified as alt-rightists would be over 24 times the number of correctly-identified alt-rightists. Indeed, we've already seen some false identifications based on pictures of people from the "Unite the Right" rally. (And just a few years ago, internet vigilantes also came to confidently wrong conclusions about the identities of the Boston Marathon bombers in exactly the same way, by poring over mediocre-to-poor-quality photos of the event, although thankfully police realized quickly these were incorrect.)

And even if you do get the right person, are you sure you want to actively encourage managers to fire people for their activities outside of work? Remember those people I mentioned earlier who are outraged about "reverse racism" and so on? Some of those people are managers. Some managers will fire Nazis because, quite accurately, they understand that Nazis are bad. But other managers will, based on the same encouragement, fire Black Lives Matter protestors. It's not hard to find examples of political commentators or even politicians calling BLM black supremacists or even terrorists. Because you know what? People don't make rational decisions based on what is actually true. Ever. About anything. They make vaguely-approaching-rational decisions based on what feels true.

You may trust yourself, or a really good boss you have, to make this sort of decision. I may even agree with those judgements. But recall the worst boss you've had, or the worst boss someone you know has had. Someone obnoxious, petty, ignorant, mean, or clearly looking for an excuse, any excuse, to fire someone. Now imagine how they'd react if you said "you should fire people for being hateful outside of work". They might fire a Nazi, but I'd place my bet on them firing a BLM supporter, or someone with a different religion than them (because, of course, disagreeing with someone's religion is blasphemy, and blasphemy is hate speech!), or someone who is very much not a Nazi but the manager falsely thinks they are because they just read a wrongheaded book or blog post that argues that some group of people actual Nazis hate, like gay people, or completely mainstream moderates, are the "real" Nazis.

If you really feel compelled to take matters into your own hands, proceed with the extremest of extreme caution, understand your own ignorance and failures and biases, admit to and suffer the consequences of your mistakes if you harm the innocent, and absolutely do not fire unless fired upon.

The last several days of arguments I've seen, and occasionally participated in, online have just gotten nasty and frustrating. So this post is all I intend to say on the topic. I am sick of being misconstrued by people I would otherwise firmly agree with. I would just like to remind them that I understand exactly what is on the line if the Nazis actually win; just off the top of my head, there are at least three, maybe seven if you really reach, reasons I will be sent to a concentration camp if America truly follows the trajectory of Nazi Germany. That's why I am so emphatic that we must head off the Nazis. We must stop them from using the media to their favor, and we must win over their target audience of people who are vaguely upset and frustrated but do not know at whom their frustration should be directed. We must reach out to the angry but not very politically engaged public and do a decent job of explaining ourselves to them and debunking Nazi paranoia and lies before the Nazis have the chance to suck them in first.

#Nazis #Punch nazis #alt-right #political strategy #the media is stupid #people are stupid #don't be stupid

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thesecretheadteacher · 6 years ago

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Who is who in the school system? Part 1 - the classroom.

For many people outside of education, despite having been through it as a child, it may all seem a bit confusing. This is especially the case when it comes to who is who behind the curtain of education. So here is my light-hearted beginners’ guide to the key players in school life, Part 1 the classroom.

***Warning some elements may contain tongues in cheeks***

1. The pupils: now as anyone involved in education will tell you, these are the most important people in the whole system. And sometimes this is even true! However, on many occasions it isn't, a lot of the time they seem to have been sent to try our patience. They can be broken down into different categories:

- The eager ones (usually female): these are the pupils who complete every assignment you set, and do it well, even that ‘build a motte and bailey castle over the holidays’ project that you thought nobody would do. They arrive back with a scaled model that looks like it would stand a good chance of winning the RIBA Stirling Prize. These monsters create almost half of the marking you end up having to do! They remember every ill-thought out promise you ever made and remind you of it. They also tell their parents far too much about what goes on in your lessons! Handy for observation lessons, work scrutiny and visitors.

- The lazy ones (usually male): this group shows no interest in anything you do. I believe they are in some sort of mental shutdown to conserve energy until they can go home and get back on their Xbox. When covering a topic like American Politics, you could have arranged for a personal visit from Barack Obama to explain the concept of the separation of power, but this would be met with a shrug and “meh”. Recent research has shown that they can be brought briefly to life with the promise of watching a Youtuber cement his head into a microwave oven at the end of the lesson if they complete a whole sentence.

- The ADHD child: they tend not to make much difference to the first 10 mins of the lesson as they haven't arrived. Once they do, however, then the fun begins: getting the coat off, sitting in the right seat, opening their book, why are you out of your seat again? No you can’t go the toilet, how did your pen leak? They will often seek to answer every question, not with the answer, but with some random experience they have had. These students are often the most difficult to teach but also the most likeable.

- The odd ones: this is a broad group of students ranging from the ‘too cool for school’ types to the downright bizarre. They operate in a different world that someone like us wouldn't understand and they believe they are living through the worst traumas life could throw at them (for a minority this could be something significant but for many, especially the Sebastians or Darcys, it might be that they are only going on one skiing holiday this year). This trauma usually manifests itself in their appearance - emo, goth or whatever the latest version of teenage angst is. Though often just one in a class they will gather in together at break and lunchtimes to share this angst of life and black nail varnish. They did enjoy a brief period of popularity when the Twilight Saga was in the cinemas.

2. The teachers: we have all had our own experience of different types of teachers ranging from the Mr Chips / Dead Poets’ Society through to the blubbering wreck of a supply teacher mid-breakdown.

- The Newly Qualified Teacher (NQT): these are the lambs to the slaughter - bright eyed and bushy tailed, looking younger and younger each year. They are a product of the modern school system - they have no recollection of smoking in the staffroom, having to cover another teacher every time you were free, getting high from the banda machine, gathering in the hall to watch the school telly (in secure frame and on its stand), running sports teams every weekend. They have come to change the world - pupil by pupil! They are usually without a family so will happily spend each evening reading educational blogs, updates and research, then planning wonderfully creative lessons and resources. This makes them ideal to befriend and ‘mentor’ a) as you will then have access to all their lessons and resources and b) despite their efforts, they are hopeless at dealing with behaviour, especially that difficult Year 9 class - which you have eating out of the palm of your hand. Quid pro quo.

- The cynic: these were once the NQTs but are now just shy of being able to retire as they had to re-mortgage in order to pay off their ex-partner. They are a malevolent force within a school, like a growing cloud of doom. They will greet every initiative with derision, usually making a comment about how “we have done this years ago” and “it didn't work back then”. They are looking to make life as easy as possible and so their lessons consist of a TES downloaded PowerPoint or faded worksheets that pre-date the Magna Carta. Can often be found leaving at 3.02pm and take great joy in ‘sticking it to the man’. Likes real ale.

- Mr or Mrs Perfect: these are a very rare breed but most schools have at least one of them. They are the staff that just seem to have cracked it. Their lessons are amazing, the students love them, their marking is not only done but done properly and they still find time to run after-school intervention, revision and extra-curricular activities. They embrace change and bring an energy to the school. All the parents want their child taught by them and, in most other walks of life, they would be drug tested for this level of performance. Avoid mixing with ‘the cynic’.

3. The support staff: thanks to the government’s chronic underfunding of education over the last 8 years, this group of staff are becoming rarer and rarer!

- The teaching assistant (TA): the good, the bad and the cardi. TAs are amongst the lowest paid and in some ways least valued members of staff and they can be a real mix.

The good are invaluable: they identify where they can add most value to your lesson - whether that is helping prepare resources, working with individuals or groups to address the failures of your teaching, or heading off behaviour issues before they begin (like the secret service of classroom support). They love working with children and make the children and the teacher better and more effective. Sadly they tend to not be around long as their many skills often lead them into teacher training.

The bad are a nightmare: their contribution to any lesson is usually negative. They often don't like the pupils and manage to turn your calm and orderly classroom into a war zone in just a few words and actions. They also don't like the teacher and resent the fact that the teacher is paid so much more than they are and for doing what? Standing there yapping on! They will invariably be late to lessons, will start talking loudly whilst you are mid-teaching sentence, shout at children they don't like - setting the cherubs off. They also spend much of break and lunchtime spreading their negativity and after school will gossip to anybody who will listen. Often to be found alongside the cynic.

The cardi: these are the cardigan wearing brigade. They have been at the school for centuries and are known and loved by all. They have worked with every generation of every large family at the school. They know were everything is within the school and are the go-to point of contact and advice on anything. In smaller schools, they are the glue that holds everything together. Like a cross between Les Dawson’s Cissie and Aida and Mary Poppins.

- The technicians: these are a very unique group. They share DNA with coach drivers and museum staff in so far as the usual have a pathological dislike of children.

The science technicians reside in their prep rooms where all manner of chemicals and scientific equipment can be found, or at least could be found if you were allowed in but they guard these rooms like a mythological Kraken. Frodo and Sam had an easier task than those students sent to the prep room on a message or to ask for additional equipment. The skeleton in the corner of these prep rooms is not a teaching tool but the remains of the last teacher to ask for lab equipment without completing the request form 3 weeks earlier.

The IT technicians also often have their own room or cave often set out with multiple screens and resembling the headquarters of a Bond villain. Their dislike of young people is only eclipsed in scale by their ability to be sarcastic. The legendary sarcasm can be combined very effectively with a look of combined disgust, disbelief and derision by anyone who suggests a possible solution or asks an ‘ignorant’ IT-based question. They love to hear people suggest “you should turn it off and on again”.

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theygotmewhipped · 6 years ago

Text

Skin - 8. Tattoo

Word Count: 4 765

“Do we really have to do this?” Kyungsoo came out of Chanyeol’s room in shorts, crop top and wig, wearing make-up.

“Yope.” I grinned. Jongin, Yixing, Junmyeon and Minseok entered the living room dressed in sexy and revealing clothing, and stood next to Kyungsoo in front of the rest of us. We started laughing out loud at them, enjoying the sight.

“Really funny, guys.” Minseok rolled his eyes annoyed.

“Thank god we won.” Sehun was laughing so much, his eyes were barely visible.

“Are you done?” Kyungsoo waited for us to stop laughing.

“Okay, okay.” I giggled. “But I gotta say, I’m actually kinda mad right now. Why does Junmyeon’s legs look better than mine in those dress? That’s unfair! And Jongin, how the hell do I get a waist like that?! Seriously, I’m never wearing a crop top again because of you.” How can boys look better wearing skirts and shit than most of the girls?! I’m offended.

“We do look quite good, don’t we?” Yixing posed for us with a smile.

“What are you talking about, Yumi? I haven’t seen anyone look better than you in a dress or a crop top.” Chanyeol said completely serious, receiving a shocked silence and stares from all of us.

“E-?” I stared at him with wide eyes and opened mouth. When Chanyeol noticed our surprise, he panicked and his face flushed red.

“Uh-ah-what I meant to say…um…was…eh…that-that you look better…cause, you know, they are guys and…you are not…and…” He stumbled on his words.

“Stop trying, dude. We all know what you really wanted to say.” Baekhyun tried to end his suffering with a bit of mocking, putting an arm around his back. Chanyeol just hung down his head in defeat.

“Let’s go celebrate!” Jongdae yelled and jumped up of the couch. Sweet god, please help me.

“I kinda feel sorry for you, guys.” I said as we sat in a bar. Our “spice girls” were receiving a lot of lustful and horny looks since we arrived and they sat hunched, trying to cover themselves as much as possible.

“No, you don’t.” Minseok replied, not believing me for a single second.

“Ah, you’re right. The taste of victory is was too sweet and you get to taste what it feels like to be a woman at least for one night so that’s another win for me.” I smugly shrugged with and stood up.

“Where are you going?” Chanyeol immediately turned at me, cutting of his conversation with Sehun.

“To get a drink.” I picked up my empty glass as a proof, knitting my eyebrows at his intrusiveness.

“I’ll go with you.” He immediately started to stand up like someone poked him in the butt.

“No need.” I frowned feeling like he was invading more than usual. “Moreover, the princesses here need someone to protect them from big bad wolves that are lurking around these woods, so you should totally stay and be their hero.” I suggested to him to let me go alone in an obscure way.

“But…” Even then, he tried to protest.

“I said stay!” I put it bluntly this time. He closed his mouth and sat back down. Thank God, I really need at least few minutes without them. For fucks sake, I’ve spent an entire day with these crazy mofos from another planet. Feels like an eternity. My life force has literally been drained from me. I don’t even know how I am still standing.

“Um, hi. Could you please give me vodka with orange juice? Oh, and make it double, please.” I addressed the bartender. I just need to drown the stress so I can survive.

“Coming up right.” The bartender turned to the bottles behind him.

“Must have been a tough day if such a pretty young lady is drinking alone at the bar.” Some weird dude approached me. I ignored him and kept looking over the bar. I’m not in a mood for some douchy dumbass who thinks he’s charming. “Playing hard to get, huh?” He kept speaking. Yep, total asshole. “Hey, I’m talking to you!” He said angrily after I ignored him again. Can’t he take a hint? Seriously, dude, you ain’t getting none, fuck off. Why do men like this try to cure their inferiority complexes and blue balls by hitting on some girl at a bar and then getting angry if she’s not interested? Isn’t it more embarrassing then just letting go after the first sentence without response?

“Here’s your drink, miss.” The bartender handed me a glass and I gave him money.

“Thanks.” I took the glass and left.

“Bitch, are you just going to ignore me?!” He strolled after me. This guy seems to be especially persistent. Better get to the table before he tries anything. I picked up the pace a little. Who would have thought that those nine fools would become a safe space?

“What do you think you’re doing?” A deep cold voice was audible behind me. Chanyeol? I turned around with wide eyes. Chanyeol was tightly grabbing onto that asshole’s arm that was reaching in my direction, glaring daggers into him. I hadn’t even noticed he was about to touch me. My breath became erratic.

“No-nothing, man.” The guy looked kinda baffled. “I didn’t know she was here with someone.” He tried to explain himself.

“Even if she wasn’t, that doesn’t give you a right to harass her.” Chanyeol was even more pissed off than the time I belittled and slandered his charity days at hospital. “Get lost! Now!” He let go of his arm and glared at him until he left. I stood there in astonishment not knowing what to do. “Seems like one princess needed saving after all.” Chanyeol smirked at me, his anger disappearing without a trace.

“I…Thank you.” I was still getting over what just happened.

All of sudden, all the others boys hurriedly approached us. This time even Chanyeol looked perplexed, not just me.

“Uhm, I think we should leave.” Junmyeon was in distress. Well, not just him, they all looked like someone was after them.

“Like, now!” Sehun said in urgency.

“Wha-why?” I asked.

“Long story short. Jongin punched someone near the restrooms so we better leave before anyone finds out.” Jongdae quickly explained. We looked at Jongin who just apologetically smiled and shrugged.

“Oh God.” I sighed and drank the whole glass at once.

“Damn, girl!” Baekhyun commented as everyone stared at me with wide eyes.

“Kay, let’s go!” Chanyeol ushered us out. We got out and ran down the street and around the corner.

“Ever loving Michelle Obama.” I was hyperventilating. “There is not a single minute of peace and quiet when you lunatics are around.” I can’t feel my lungs. Or maybe I feel them too much? Oh how I hate running.

“You’ll have all the peace and quiet you need when you’re dead.” Kyungsoo countered. “At least that’s what they told me.” He shrugged seemingly unaffected by the run.

“Heh?” I squinted at him through my heavy breaths.

“Let’s just go home. I think we’ve had enough for one day.” Jongin suggested.

“You think?” All of us said in unison staring at him in disbelief.

After we got home Kyungsoo and Minseok went to change.

“Aren’t you going to change as well?” Chanyeol asked Yixing, Junmyeon and Jongin.

“You know, it’s actually quite comfortable.” Junmyeon wiggled in the dress.

“Yeah, the amount of space down there is…liberating.” Yixing plopped down on the couch.

“Eww, at least close your legs, man. I don’t wanna look at your junk.” Baekhyun scrunched his nose on the other side of the sitting space.

“We all know you’re enjoying it so why the hell you lying?” I teased him.

“I sure would enjoy it if it was you sitting there.” He replied with a smug face. Junmyeon who was about to sit down next to him just smacked him across his head making me giggle.

“Sorry, but my shop has strict anti-losers policy, loser.” I smirked at him.

“At least we know why Chanyeol didn’t get in.” Sehun said not looking up from his phone. We all started chuckling like an idiots.

“What’s so funny?” Minseok entered the room now wearing sweatpants and a tank top.

“Well I’m done with you all today. Good night, losers.” I took my stuff and made an escape to my room.

I was about to get comfortable and finally relax when there was a knock on my door. “What?!” I opened the door, revealing Chanyeol carrying pillow and blanket in baggy shorts and white shirt with holes, giving me a sad puppy eyes. I let out a heavy sigh. “I’m not gonna like this, am I?”

“Can I please sleep in your room?”

“No.” I answered sternly.

“But…”

“No.”

“Yumi, let me explain…” He pleaded with me.

“No.”

“I kinda miscalculated.” He proceeded anyway.

“No.”

“And now there is only eight…”

“No.” I kept repeating myself while he was trying to explain the situation.

“…and I forgot to…”

“No.”

“…include myself.”

“No.”

“That’s why I need…”

“No.”

“…a place to sleep.”

“Ugh, fine.” I gave up. “But you sleep on the floor.”

“Thanks, Yumi. You’re a real life savior.” He brightly smiled at me and entered the room.

“Tell me something I don’t know. I should’ve just let you sleep on those cold kitchen floor tiles or something.” I closed the door behind him and climbed into my bed while he made his on the floor.

After watching few episodes of Punisher I checked up on Chanyeol. “Hey, Yeol.” I called out to him. No answer. “Are you asleep?” Still no response. Cool, I’m taking my leave then. I took my wallet and keys, then checked up on Chanyeol once again.

He looks like a cute giant baby when he’s sleeping and that peaceful silence. It’s an unbelievable sight to see him not spitting out words one after another longer than ten seconds for once. I kneeled down in front of his face.

Looks squishy. Must touch. My brain completely shut down letting my instincts take over. My hand moved with a mind of its own and poked his cheek. After receiving no reaction I reached out again and carefully put my fingers on his face softly caressing his cheek. I don’t know if it’s because he’s asleep or because I’m the one initiating the touch but I don’t feel the usual anxiety. It’s still burning a little but it’s not that bad. He’s so soft. I am barely touching him but still…

Suddenly he exhaled sharply through his nose. “Shit.” I pulled my arm back. Maybe he’s just dreaming since he doesn’t seem to be waking up. Nevertheless, what the heck was I just doing?! That was unbelievably stupid! Aaand the brain power is back on. Time to leave.

I left the apartment and entered the first opened pub I found.

“The strongest drink you’ve got, please.” I ordered. After today, it’s not gonna be enough anyway. I’m not sure if light drugs would be enough at this point.

“Are you sure, miss?” The bartender raised an eyebrow at me.

“Yep.” Dude, if you had to survive a day with nine guys with minds of ten years old, you would want some too. I know what I’m talking about.

“Can I see your ID, please?” You gotta be kidding me. I’m not twelve. I took out my ID and handed it over to him. He suspiciously checked it out for almost a whole minute then returned it like he never asked.

“I’ll have Bacardi, please.” Familiar voice next to me ordered.

“Did you follow me, you skank?” I turned to look at Chanyeol. Wasn’t he sleeping?

“Yeah, kinda. I heard you leave so I got worried since it’s middle of the night and I…” He admitted.

“Geez, okay, just shut up.” There goes my alone time. I already miss his sleeping self. Wait…Fuck. I hope he wasn’t up, when I touched him!! Shit, what am I gonna do if he knows?! I looked at him trying to hide my panic. Well, he’s not saying anything about it and doesn’t look flustered or confused. And he doesn’t seem to be deep in thoughts, although he never does. Geez, I’m so stupid. But he’s quiet so I guess my dignity remains without a harm.

After the bartender handed us our orders, we sat at the bar looking at our glasses like two losers.

“I have an idea.” Chanyeol lifted his head up looking like he just solved how to end the global warming.

“No.” I dismissed him immediately.

“You don’t even know what it is.” He complained.

“Knowing you, it’s definitely something that’s gonna make me regret ever leaving my bed. So no.” That’s the most probable outcome to anything that comes out of Chanyeol’s head.

“No, it’s not.” He was persuading me.

“Gosh, fine. What is it?” I rolled my eyes. He would go on and on until I would let him speak and I’m too tired for that right now.

“Why don’t we play ‘two truths one lie’ while we drink?” Chanyeol laid out his grand idea.

“No.” I replied as usual knowing all too well it would be bite me in the ass in the end if I went along with it.

“Why ‘no’?”

“Why yes? Why do you want to play?” I didn’t understand why he was so adamant about it.

“Cos I want to get to know you better.” He had an amiable smile plastered on his face.

“Why would you want that? There’s nothing interesting to know about me.” I didn’t want to accept his motives.

“Because we are friends. I want to know even the boring stuff although I doubt there is some.” He chuckled to himself.

“Even if you say so, you are still mistaken at one thing. You may consider me your friend but you are not mine.” I reminded him and coldly looked at him. He furrowed his brows and frowned for a second then smiled.

“If you say so.” Why the heck is he smiling? “Despite that, I still want to play.” I just told him he is basically no one to me and yet here he is smiling acting like nothing happened. What’s going on in his head?

“Fine, whatever, if it makes you happy I don’t care as long as I get to drink. Let’s go sit elsewhere though.” I stood up. Chanyeol took the glasses and followed me to one of the tables.

“Cheers to us!” He handed me a glass.

“Cheers I suppose.” We drank the content. “Bleh, what the…this is not my drink!” I exclaimed.

“Yeah…I know.” Chanyeol said with a twisted face. “Why did you order something so strong?”

“You exchanged them on purpose, didn’t you?” I regarded him with blank expression. Why am I not surprised?

“Yep.” He regretted drinking the stronger shot.

“Why?” I was displeased.

“Cos I didn’t want you to get drunk and then feel sick.” He gave me pleading eyes.

“First of all, I can handle my liquor and second, don’t be so overprotective over everything I do. Seriously, dude, I’m not made of sugar and you are not my mom.” I was serious.

“I can see that now.” He stood up. “If you excuse me, I’m gonna get myself some water.” What a baby.

“You know how to play, right?” He asked when he got back.

“It’s not quantum physics, of course, I do.” I rolled my eyes.

“Okay, okay. So who goes first?” He is way too excited to play this game for kids.

“I don’t really care, you can go first if you want to.” I laid my head on my hand nonchalantly staring at him.

“Alright. So…I have a sister. I can play piano. And I hate romantic movies.” He counted the statements on his fingers.

“The second one is a lie. You play guitar, not piano.” I answered without hesitation.

“Wrong. I actually play piano, guitar and drums. The third was a lie. I kinda like romantic movies.” I wasn’t paying much attention to the game nor was I planning to but he had me intrigued from the beginning. How does one even master so many instruments?

“I should have known that since you’re such a softie and all.” I looked down at the empty glass hiding my amazement. “I have a new rule, if you don’t mind.” I looked up at him.

“Okay?” He raised his eyebrows.

“Every time we get it wrong we drink a shot. What do you say? Something light of course so we won’t be fuck faced after two rounds.” I suggested. Mainly because I wanted to get drunk. But I kinda wanted to see if Chanyeol’s personality would change under the influence. Maybe his innocent act will finely fall off.

“Um, okay, sure, we can do that.” He agreed. I got us the drinks and immediately gulped one down.

“My turn. So, I have a sister as well.” Obvious truth, since he met her. “I work as a waitress. And I want to visit New York.” It’s actually kinda hard to think of a lie for it to sound like it’s the truth.

“The second is definitely a lie. You hate interacting with people way too much to work as a waitress.” He replied confidently and I grinned.

“Well, drink up, boy, cos you got it wrong. The New York one was a lie.” I smiled victoriously.

“Why don’t you want to visit New York?” He turned a glass down.

“Because it’s just an overhyped concrete jungle with too many people and nothing special. Who cares about copper lady and what used to be the tallest building.” I know it’s an unpopular opinion, but it’s what I think. I’d rather explore Amazon Forest than visit New York.

“Uhm, okay.” Chanyeol didn’t comment it further with an unreadable expression. Then he proceeded to play the game instead. “First, I haven’t had a relationship. When I have kids. I want them to be a boy and a girl in that order. And the last, I like broccoli.” He smirked at me, being sure I would get this wrong.

“Oh well, the second is oddly specific, but I think that’s a truth.” I studied Chanyeol’s face for clues. “There’s a lot of people who like broccoli, I wouldn’t be surprised if you did, but I’m pretty sure that you’ve been single your whole life, which leads us back to the small tree. The third is a lie.” I was convinced. Chanyeol just chuckled.

“I like your thinking but no. I really do like broccoli.” He amusedly smiled giving me a chance to correct myself.

“Then you don’t want to have kids in that order or not at all or what?” I just shoot at the possibilities of the second statement.

“No, that was the truth as well. The first was a lie.” He snorted, somewhat upset that I didn’t consider that option at all. I frowned.

“You’ve had a relationship? Like dating somebody? Really?” I couldn’t wrap my mind around it.

“Is it really that surprising?” Chanyeol snorted again.

“Well, yeah.” I emptied another glass.

“Am I so horrible for you to think that I never dated anyone?” He was frowning. Is he hurt by that idea?

“No, actually you’re what most of the girls would call boyfriend material or goals or some shit like that.” His frown disappeared after I said that. Instead a small smile appeared on his face. “I just don’t understand how haven’t you kissed or fucked anyone if you’ve been in a relationship.” I explained what led me to my conclusion.

“Relationships aren’t just about that. And at that time I didn’t feel ready, I didn’t needed it. I was happy just to hold her and have her by my side. Although, she apparently wasn’t since she was sleeping with some other guy behind my back. But that doesn’t change anything about the fact that physical contact isn’t the only thing that makes relationship a relationship.” Says a guy who literally looked for a cuddly buddy. …although it is true that he didn’t requested cuddling for quite some time now. …did he stop asking for them because he had found out about my fear? Or even before that? I have no idea how the timeline goes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” I hung my head down. I can sympathize with him. One bad partner can mess up your whole life. Some may even never get over what’s been done to them.

“It’s alright. How could you, right?” He tried to brighten up a little.

“I think, we should flush it down with a drink.” I suggested. Let the alcohol wash away all the resurfacing memories.

“Kay, then it’s your turn.” He lifted a glass. We looked at each other smiling over the pain and drank the content of our glasses.

“Fine.” I took a while to think. “I used to have sugar gliders as pets. I hate you. I would sell my soul to meet with Ryan Reynolds.” I felt the alcohol finally kicking in.

“That’s easy.” Chanyeol smirked. “Second one is a lie. You don’t really hate me even though you say you do. A lot, and often.” He snickered.

“How did you know?” I didn’t expect him to get it right. I mean I do say that I hate him pretty often.

“I just know. Your actions speak for you even if you don’t realize it.” He was happily smiling.

“What are you talking about?” I raised an eyebrow at him. What actions? I’m not aware of anything I did that could let him think otherwise.

“Nothing, it’s my turn.” He dismissed it.

“We really don-now anything about each otha, do we?” Chanyeol jumbled his words. After a few more rounds we were completely trashed, now trying to get home.

“Well, we know each other just a few weeks so it’s not that supr-rprising.” I got stuck on the last word.

“I saw Baekhyun naked after three days.” He said seriously.

“Now that, is not a surprise at all.” We laughed at that. “But! I did see you naked already as well.” I pointed out, trying to implicate that it has nothing to do with actually knowing each other. Chanyeol’s ears turned red, now matching his cheeks red from alcohol.

“Haha, yeah.” He was embarrassed.

Somehow we ended up in a park few blocks away. We sat down on the grass and looked in to the night. Everything seemed so peaceful without people rushing around. It was just us and the dark sky above us.

“Thank you.” I said out of nowhere. My mouth worked quicker than my brain could process.

“Huh? What for?” He looked at me for clarification.

“For being you.” I looked into his lost eyes. I think I’m gonna regret this tomorrow but I’m drunk and feeling weirdly content right now so let this be a new reason for anxiety of my future self instead of present.

“I must say I don’t understand right now.” He said completely serious looking like all the alcohol has drained from him for a moment.

“Thank you for being the way you are. For being so patient and considerate with me. I really appreciate it even though it might not look like it. And thank you for making me feel alive again after what feels like an eternity.” I expressed my feelings honestly. Maybe it’s the alcohol or the fact that I’m exhausted that I let this slip out of my mouth but I couldn’t careless at the moment. I wasn’t feeling on the edge for the first time in a while and everything just seemed so calm. This was where I was supposed to be at the moment and I wanted to savor it.

“My pleasure.” He sincerely smiled at me.

“Geez, I’m making this beautiful night so serious.” I fell back and lied down on the grass not wanting to continue this emotional skydiving.

“Can I ask you something?” He turned around leaning over me.

“Sure.” I shrugged.

“What made you like this? What happened to you that it makes you panic when you’re touched by someone?” He got a bit closer but still kept his distance. And there goes the peace of the night. My face froze in an angry expression.

“None of your business.” I growled. Chanyeol moved away from me with baffled expression and turn his face away from me.

“I shouldn’t have asked. My bad, I’m sorry.” His pained voice forced me to calm down making me realize that I lashed out at him for nothing.

“No, I’m sorry.” I sat back up. “I just really don’t want to think about that right now. They’re not exactly pleasant memories and it’s better to not bring them up.” I explained ashamed by my reaction.

“It’s okay. I understand. You don’t have to push yourself.” He smiled reassuringly.

“Thanks.” I gratefully smiled at him. All of a sudden a chill ran through me making me shiver. Chanyeol must have noticed because he took off his hoodie and handed it to me.

“Here, put this on. It’s quite cold outside.” I accepted his offer and reached for his hoodie.

“Huh?” I halted when I noticed a familiar picture on his arm. “Is that…? How did you…?” I stared at his arm mind blown. Is it real? How long does he have it and why haven’t I noticed till now?

“Oh, the tattoo?” He twisted his arm more so it would be more visible. “I really liked your drawing so I took it and had it tattooed. Looks awesome, doesn’t it?” He brightly smiled.

“Why would you do that?” I asked quietly, completely shocked. It was just a useless sketch inspired by his guitar. It wasn’t even completely finished. Just piece of trash that was supposed to end up in junkyard or be recycled into a toilette paper. Instead he made it into an eternal piece of art. On his body nevertheless.

“Because it spoke to me. When I saw the unique style in which you draw the guitar I just couldn’t help it. I wanted the feeling I had while looking at it to last forever.” He caressed the tattoo with a fond smile.

“I…I don’t know what to say.” It was so unexpected to see my drawing immortalized on someone’s body. I never imagined something like this to happen. I can’t say it didn’t make me happy though. Something I did, I created, was good enough for someone. My work held a meaning in someone else’s mind. I wonder when he took it though. I hadn’t even noticed him taking it home from the hospital.

“Just put on the hoodie before you freeze to death.” He warmly looked at me and changed the subject. I put on the hoodie and looked at the horizon above the buildings, thankful that he didn’t elaborate any further. I had mixed feelings about this whole situation.

“It’s already dawn?! Let’s go home before your friends wake up.” I stood up and brushed off my butt in a stupid attempt to escape this night that turned into an emotional turmoil.

“Minseok is probably already up.” Chanyeol said thinking looking at his watch.

“Wha-? I’m not even asking. He gives me creeps anyway.” I shook my head. Chanyeol just giggled. Who in their right mind wakes up so early in the morning? One day, there’ll be news on the TV about some crazy serial killer with some weird habits and carving initials into their victims and then there’ll be Minseok’s picture shown and I won’t even get shocked because who else than serial killer would wake up at this ungodly hour.

“Oh, and they are your friends as well now. There is no escaping us anymore. With me, you basically signed up for the whole squad.” He grinned. So I’m basically next body in the ditch somewhere, is that it? Either I kill myself because I won’t be able to handle their presence or I’ll be Minseok’s next victim. The end of the month was never this far away.

“You gotta be kidding me, right? Even having you around is too much for my poor soul of eighty year old granny.” I complained. I won’t survive for another week if Chanyeol makes me spend time with them again.

“No.” He happily skipped around me. “And when I win our bet, you’ll never get rid of us.” He laughed.

“Good thing that I’m winning then.” I scoffed.

First Chapter——–Previous Chapter——–Next Chapter

Bonus:

I just love this boy and his tattoos..

#chanyeol #park chanyeol #exo #exo au #exo fanfiction #exo fluff #slice of life #fluff #not a love story #fanfiction #fanfic #ff #own writing #own work #ao3 #archive of our own #Wattpad

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eurotastic · 8 years ago

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Eurovision reviews: Semi 2

When the obvious winner is in the big 5, the semis just feel a little weird. With semi 1, we have Portugal, who could win if the juries decide to wreck Italy’s score, but in semi 2 there is not a single winning candidate, which just makes it...I don’t want to call it pointless, but I’d definitely call it a weak semi.

But you know that I’ll review every single song anyway, because I love every single second of this bullshit competition.

1: Serbia: Tijana Bogićević-In Too Deep

What a weird way to start off the night. This is pretty modern and cool, but it just can’t stand out whatsoever. Everyone will have forgotten about it by the fifth song or so.

4/10

2: Austria: Nathan Trent-Running On Air

I hate Ed Sheeran. A lot. I’m not saying this song sounds exactly like him, but it’s the same genre, and I hate this genre more than anything. With that said, I can’t believe how much I actually like this. It might be the staging, which is fantastic, and really takes this basic, natural-sounding song to the next level.

6/10

3: Formeryugoslavianrepublicofmacedonia: Jana Burčeska-Dance Alone

The difference between a non-qualifier and a song that finishes last is the performance. In fact, many songs that have finished last through the years have been good songs, destroyed completely by a bad performance (I’m willing to bet that Iceland came last in semi 1, there were lots of worse songs but the performance is what sunk it).

The formeryugoslavianrepublicofmacedonian song is actually one of the better pop songs this year, but as soon as i saw previews of the performance I knew it would have a really hard time qualifying. I hope I’m wrong, because the song is fire.

7/10

4: Malta: Claudia Faniello-Breathlessly

Thank fucking god there are so few ballads tonight, after semi 1 I never wanna hear another ballad in my entire life.

3/10

5: Romania: Ilinca ft. Alex Florea-Yodel It!

How does a human being come up with this concept? Did they write down random music genres on a dartboard to come up with this unholy genre combination? Why is it so catchy? Why do I like this? Who cares?

10/10

6: The Netherlands: OG3NE Lights and Shadows

This song basically exists under the assumption that these girls can make anything sounds amazing. Their vocal harmonies are fantastic, but the song is just a tired cliché, and that’s not enough. I’m sure their voices will sound great though.

4/10

7: Hungary: Joci Pápai-Origo

Not that the bar is raised very high to begin with, but this is definitely the best attempt at fusing rap and traditional music I’ve ever heard. It’s monotonous and somber, but it definitely works. Also, if you squint and turn your TV upside down, the singer kinda resembles Oscar Isaac. That’s a nice bonus.

7/10

8: Denmark: Anja-Where I Am

Denmark, which is my favorite third world country, hasn’t been to the grand final since 2014, and I find that way funnier than I should. It would be fun if they missed another final, but at the same time I almost think this singer deserves a little better.

This song is just so fucking boring, but the juries might put it through based on a strong vocal performance.

3/10

9: Ireland: Brendan Murray-Dying to Try

If this song was called Trying to Die i would probably enjoy it a lot more. It would make the staging fit the song even better, it could end with the hot air balloon exploding and killing little Brendan! I’d vote for that.

(EDIT: When I say “killing little Brendan”, I mean fake dying like Lady Gaga at the 2009 VMAs, you know, just for drama. I’m really sorry if it sounded like some kind of death threat!)

3/10

10: San Marino: Valentina Monetta and Jimmie Wilson-Spirit of the Night

Who is this random american dude and who tricked him into singing with Valentina? Did Uncle Siegel lure him into a white van?

[Edit: I just found out that the “random american dude” has played the lead in a german musical about President Obama, and that’s the weirdest fucking thing I’ve heard all week. Now I just hear Obama’s voice whenever Jimmy sings.]

Most countries don’t let artists who fail in ESC represent them again, but San Marino isn’t most countries. Is it possible that Valentina is the only singer in the country, and they don’t have a choice but to send her? She’s actually a pretty fun performer, but i wish they’d finally give her a decent song, this is a dated mess (but a fun dated mess).

3/10

11: Croatia: Jacques Houdek-My Friend

I know schizofrenic isn’t the right word to describe this, but it’s the first thing that comes to mind. The way he switches between his Big Important Opera voice and his Boyband Voice is a trainwreck, his stupid fucking outfit is a trainwreck, the italian lyrics are stupid, and the fact that Croatia’s “Homophobe of the year” is singing this disaster in front of a goddamn double rainbow takes it to a new level of awful.

With that said, the grand final wouldn’t be complete without this catastrophe.

?/10 (can not be rated in any human number system)

12: Norway: JOWST-Grab The Moment

I can’t decide if I like this or not...It’s decent for radio but I’m not sure if it’s interesting enough for Eurovision. Probably not qualifying.

4/10

13: Switzerland: Timebelle-Apollo

This song is about as interesting as watching yellow paint dry, but at least the singer has the best eyebrows I’ve seen in a long time.

4/10

14: Belarus: Naviband-Story of My Life

Goddamn hippies.

6/10

15: Bulgaria: Kristian Kostov-Beautiful Mess

The only song from this semi that could end up in the top 3. Super modern. but I still feel like it’s more of a slow radio hit.

7/10

16: Lithuania: Fusedmarc-Rain Of Revolution

I’m willing to say that this is the worst song of the year. It can’t even be compared to any human music genre on earth, it’s just aimless screaming over a bland instrumental that tries to be dramatic. It’s not even funny, I just hate it.

0/10

17: Estonia: Koit Toome & Laura-Verona

When I first heard this song, I thought it was a mistake. A dated, boring mistake. However, after hearing it in rehearsals over and over it has definitely become a favorite of mine.

I hear people are calling it an 80′s throwback, but I’d say it sounds more like swedish schlager from the early 2000s, production-wise. In fact, I think if this song had competed in Melfest in ~2003, it would have won, it’s schlager perfection. No matter how good I think it is though, the fact that it sounds dated will bring it down, but I hope it qualifies. Estonia deserves it after last year’s disaster.

9/10

18: Israel: IMRI-I Feel Alive

I just really miss Golden Boy when I hear this song. Couldn’t they at least recycle some of the choreography?

5/10

#eurovision #eurovision song contest #eurotastic reviews

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peterwknox · 8 years ago

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Insane Clown President: Dispatches from the 2016 Circus by Matt Taibbi My rating: 3 of 5 stars Given the amount of media noise on the 2016 Presidential Campaign, it's not surprising that Taibbi wasn't the loudest. But he should be heard and this collection of his dispatches for Rolling Stone from 2015-16 is your second chance. I would have enjoyed the book more if the ending were different, but it's not something to fault Taibbi for, as he was speaking the truth throughout and this book is proof. It's painful to read in retrospect, something Taibbi works to overcome with a fantastic introduction and epilogue and a few footnotes throughout. It's cliche to point out that Taibbi is the new HST at Rolling Stone, but his writing is so sharp (and he's more academic, which is a necessary upgrade for a HST today in this Fake News world) and insults so original, we shouldn't take it for granted. He's still must-read in today's inflated oversaturated media landscape. Better than most, he saw Trump coming, explained it clearly but also explained it away, and I commend him in publishing this collection so we can relive the highs and lows and see where America went so very wrong. Let's hope Taibbi has much more to say on the subject. I don't recommend that everyone look back over the last two years of campaign hell (I wanted to quit many times, but he reminded me that this WAS funny in the moment - although I would've left out the liveblog debate & casting segments for not aging well), but there's no better guide for these dark times. Here's some of my favorite highlights: Donald Trump’s innovation was to recognize what a bad TV show the campaign was. Any program that tried to make stars out of human sedatives like Scott Walker and Lindsey Graham needed new producers and a new script. ... Editorially the press denounced him, but it never turned the cameras off. ... in the modern Republican Party, making sense is a secondary consideration. ... Trump is striking a chord with people who are feeling the squeeze in a less secure world and want to blame someone—the government, immigrants, political correctness, “incompetents,” “dummies,” Megyn Kelly, whoever—for their problems. ... Donald Trump, if elected, would find a way to turn being the president into a moneymaking operation. ... Like autoerotic asphyxiation, supporting Donald Trump is an activity many people prefer to enjoy in a private setting, like in a shower or a voting booth. ... Trump found the flaw in the American Death Star. It doesn’t know how to turn the cameras off, even when it’s filming its own demise. ... If you could somehow run simulations where Bush was repeatedly shipwrecked on a desert island with 20 other adults chosen at random, he would be the last person listened to by the group every single time. ... Trump’s naked disdain for the less-glamorous American flyover provinces he somehow keeps winning by massive margins continued to be one of the livelier comic subplots of the campaign. ... If this isn’t the end for the Republican Party, it’ll be a shame. They dominated American political life for 50 years and were never anything but monsters. They bred in their voters the incredible attitude that Republicans were the only people within our borders who raised children, loved their country, died in battle or paid taxes. They even sullied the word “American” by insisting they were the only real ones. ... Trump has turned the new Republican Party into high school. It will be cruel, clique-y and ruled by insult kings like himself and Ann Coulter, whose headline description of Cruz (“Tracy Flick With a Dick”) will always resonate with Trump voters more than a thousand George Will columns. ... Trump is going to lose this election, then live on as the reason for an emboldened, even less-responsive oligarchy. And you thought this election season couldn’t get any worse. ... Pence redefines boring. He makes Al Gore seem like the Wu-Tang Clan. ... How Giuliani isn’t Trump’s running mate, no one will ever understand. Theirs is the most passionate television love story since Beavis and Butt-head. Every time Trump says something nuts, Giuliani either co-signs it or outdoes him. They will probably spend the years after the election doing prostate-medicine commercials together. ... As always, the Republicans acted far too late in disavowing vicious and disgusting behavior in their ranks. Then again, it’s hard to keep the loons out when you’re scraping to find people willing to sell rich-friendly policies to a broke population. ... Trump can’t win. Our national experiment can’t end because one aging narcissist got bored of sex and food. Not even America deserves that. ... Those of us whose job it is to cover campaigns long ago grew accustomed to treating The People as a kind of dumb animal, whose behavior could sometimes be unpredictable but, in the end, almost always did what it was told. ... From a personality standpoint, Obama is everything Trump isn’t. He’s in control of his emotions, thick-skinned, self-aware, ingratiating, strategic and temperamentally (if not politically) consistent. A striking quality of Obama as president is that he did his job without seeming to need to take credit for things all of the time, which kept the political price down on many of his decisions. View all my reviews

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randomthingsthatilike1 · 8 years ago

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So this is regarding the Supercat AU I just posted about yesterday (link here)--who in the supergirl cast would fill what position?

So first thing’s first: Press Secretary.

As Annabeth put it, for 6 years CJ Cregg managed the press through charm and disarm, a seduction. And yes Cat could do it, but you know who would both be good at it and enjoy it?

James.

Alex is obviously chief of staff (and for more comparisons between Jed and Leo and Kara and Alex, I p much already wrote like 2k already tbh). But I will leave here: you gotta best friend? Are they smarter than you? That’s your chief of staff. (And yeah former Surgeon General and army medic turned chief of staff Yup that’s Alex)

As for Lucy? Lucy I can see so much as Deputy Chief of Staff. She’s smart and determined and never sleeps and has So Many contacts in DC—former lawyer that briefed the joint-chiefs-of-staff, General Sam Lane’s daughter, and a Democrat? Yeah, she knows the game. She speaks Republican, since she was raised by one, and knows exactly how to charm and intimidate alike. So many Republican asswhipes just see an attractive woman or a shy little girl and just get absolutely hammered by Lucy. Very few see her coming. She’s been in Washington before sure—but there’s a new Congress every 2 years, and a lot of them have either forgotten or never knew that Lucy wasn’t just a damn wave, she was a tsunami (she was military back then. And her job consisted of keeping her mouth shut, both regarding the secrets she knew and her opinions on the (then) current political climate. This isn’t opening up a debate or anything but even most of the staunchest Republicans were like ‘that’s legit’ when former General Mike Flynn got fired for bad mouthing Obama when he was in uniform. People never really realized she had the blinders on, pretty much always.)

Oh man, and VP Hank Henshaw (yes I know his name is really J’onn but I’m making Hank his middle name and Henshaw his mom’s maiden name. He’s going into politics—a name like J’onn Jonzz doesn’t exactly play the best), former General and joint-chief, Kara’s foil. Most people see the sunshiney optimism, her youth, and her career background and forget that she’s former military. They see Hank, all of his experience with foreign affairs and military and wisdom and are comforted because there’s just one meter in which you judge the Vice President—on their ability to assume the Presidency. And this is politics—they don’t only want him as VP because he’s black, but it definitely made it easier to make that decision as opposed to Chief of Staff.

Winn. I blame @civilorange for this but cat and winn really could have a potential for friendship and really lbr Winn is Sunny and Awkward enough to be this version of Sam, the two of them the Batman and Robin of the White House (and oh man—the scandal isn’t that he accidentally slept with a call girl. The scandal is he’s the toymaker’s son). The boy can write, can knock socks off and has a phenomenal grasp of written oratory and syntax. But he’s completely fucked if he tries to do it in front of like. Anyone he doesn’t know very well, he just freezes up. The Toymaker’s son didn’t exactly have a sheltered childhood, filled with encouragement and support. He learned how to trust, but it’s tentative. He’s not right for Communications Director but as Cat’s deputy? That’s enough.

And then Kara. My kiddo. The star of the show. Like I mention before she was a ROTC college kid, didn’t have access to her trust fund because she was put in witness protection as a kid—her parents’ killer Non is apprehended when she was a sophomore in college but her parents very much instilled a sense of duty in her. She kept going. She comes from a very wealthy family sure, but she can’t access it until she’s 25 anyway Her mom was a Supreme Court Justice and her dad an astronaut at NASA (less of a commute than you might think when you have your own small private plane and are a pilot. Kara grew up knowing that the sky was never the limit), her aunt one of the youngest generals in military history—yeah, a lot of people wanted them dead. She’s a bit aimless in college, Art and Political Science and Linguistics, double minor in military science and astronomy. I don’t think most people realize just how smart Kara is, not to mention easily she bores. She likes being busy, being faster than any thoughts of her past (also no way does Astra ‘I love my niece more than anything in this life’ not teach kara at a v young age how to fight. Kara is very good at it)

She does her requisite 4 years, spends the next two years kind of just enjoying life as an artist, taking it easy and dealing with both childhood trauma and the shit she’s seen in the past 4 years and just slowing down a bit. She sells some of her art, not because she needs the money but because she wants to have it out there. She’s still in her 20’s when she starts working as a diplomat—her record definitely helps. She never really got to travel much but now she does—and damn does she just soak in languages like a sponge.

When she finally feels like setting roots, she goes back home, gets her grad degree in Astronomy—she’s always had a love affair with the stars. Maybe becomes a professor for a little while—you know the one, the one everyone has a crush on and is the one

And kara would 10/10 would be that person that stands up to some bigoted politician and just be absolutely Done with his policies and everyone else is just afraid of him, the guy’s been their district’s representative for decades and is corrupt af so she kind of gets into politics because fuck him she’d do a better job and she cares way more about their country than he does and oh man what if it’s like the Horton Wilde Campaign and the only other candidate has had four heart attacks (and God I’m just reminded of that line “There are worse things in the world than no longer being alive.”), so. She runs and lmao Kara’s surprised that she actually does win but 0/10 is anyone else because she’s dripping with charisma and sincerity and is so damn smart and inspirational and not to mention she’s pretty much looks like a Greek pantheon, along with an exceptional pedigree and has a spotless record (except—it’s not spotless. She was expecting it to come out, but she’s been discrete with any relationships she’s ever had, women with just as much skin in the game as she does. They don’t come up).

She wins, and then she keeps on winning. She moves from the House of Representatives to Governor and she’s two year into her second when her sister comes back to their home state, unannounced, with a crumpled up napkin she’s been carrying in her pocket for the past few days.

Danvers for America

And that brings me to my next point--Cat as Toby, White House Communications Director—there’s too much of a conflict of interest for the former (she takes a leave of absence) head of a media conglomerate to be the press secretary. Not to mention—Cat can charm the pants off of anyone but she is biting and sarcastic and sometimes a bit hostile. So can she do it? Sure. But more like a fill in kind of thing. There’s never any secret plan to fight inflation kind of thing. She could do it long term, but she doesn’t really want to. Cat was first and foremost, a journalist. A writer—there are very few people good enough to write for the White House, and Cat is one of them. (and you know who’s a grumpy cat? Toby. You know who else is a grumpy cat? Cat.)

Seriously, Toby and Cat would get together so well, they have such a similar sense of humor and idealism “it cant go far” “yes” “somewhere in this building is our talent”—or setting aflame horrible writing. She’s an award winning writer, able to inculcate hope and optimism into an entire city with just a few words, and almost completely on the fly. She takes a leave of absence from CatCo, brings Carter to DC—he’s young, he bounces back. She has plenty of savings that the lack of salary doesn’t really bother her.

And it’s been years but Cat feels re-energized, driven, motivated again. And it’s all because of Kara, brilliant, beautiful, wholly and sincerely good. She feels a tugging in her gut, fingers itching to smooth that little crinkle between her eyes, the one that shows up at the end of a particularly difficult day at the White House, one ending in body counts, absolute devastation in every glance and gesture because Kara takes everything so personally and Cat just wants to see her smile again. But Cat knows how this story goes. She tells herself that this is simply admiration, that she isn’t half in love with the most powerful person on the planet, that what she feels is just what the rest of the staff feels, and she’s misreading all the signs and gestures and body language because the President of the United States is not gay.

Except, that all goes right out of her brain whenever she sees Kara’s smile—like the sun. Kara’s sunshine, all of it, relieving warmth that envelops you like the softest, gentlest hug, rays of light breaking through after a snowstorm, light erupting through the clouds after a night you aren’t sure you’ll ever survive—the harsh, unrelenting, UV waves, burning everything in its path. Sunburns and melanoma, droughts, forest fires, sun’s rays harnessed to the point of combustion, going from pleasantly warm to scorching in a matter of minutes—the two Karas.

But Cat sees them both--and it’s not that she doesn’t care, because that’s the point. Cat does care. She sees both sides of Kara, and with every stolen moment, every conversation, every time she promises herself just once more—and it’s never enough. God help her if (when) Kara finally clues in, because there’s no going back—Cat is ruined. She’s fallen in love with her President, and Cat may be the woman with a plan but not this time.

#supercat #supergirl #the west wing #kara danvers #cat grant #tww #lucy lane #alex danvers #j'onn jones #winn schott #james olsen #i dont like how this ended #and this is just the original cast #the main original cast #i have plaNS #;D #superwing #superwing au

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