#euphemia: but what were you shown?
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im looking forward to next session of dnd in two weeks for lots of reasons but also because i think telling Euphemia that i had a vision that i killed her boss in a very like, personal and up close manner will go extremely well for me
#naielle: yeah so i had this vision and talked to my patron about it-#euphemia: what was the vision?#naielle: uhhhh a thing that happened but also didnt but was maybe supposed to? its sort of unclear. and my patron said-#euphemia: but what were you shown?#naielle: oh. yknow. a room. theres a handful of other people. ive got a weird sword i dont recognise. and im uh#*small voice* im stabbing your boss#AND from there we can only imagine how euphemia reacts. best case she accepts naielles UTTER panic as genuine#and that this isnt an idiot revealing her assassination plan. worst case naielles gonna perform a high speed dimension door#and probably fail because the compound is sort of Fucked but i kind of hope Big A upstairs gives her a hand#like goes 'oh shit euphemia is about to murder my girlie hang on' and supercharges the dimension door to get past wards#listen ive thought a lot about this and the conversation does hinge on a preceding convo with her patron#which im gonna demand the chance to get bc naielle Would do it#but afaict the only way this doesnt happen is if euphemia makes herself unavailable#in which case naielle gets to tell the vision thing to the man she murdered in it :)#other way it doesnt happen is if the message from marius thing stops naielle from getting around to it lmaoooo#the fun bit about killing her boss is she was present for that. he wasnt her boss when that happened but she was there#she doesnt REMEMBER that and neither does Naielle because her sense of other people in the scene is minimal#but this timeline euphemia i feel like is not gonna be enthused by this like. whole thing
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Recovery
@wolfstarmicrofic
Word count: 607
***
The day Sirius came to James’ house was, if anything, a chaotic day.
Showing up at the Potter’s front door so badly injured he very quickly passed out from exhaustion and blood loss. Euphemia called healers to the house immediately, while James called for Remus and Peter.
The second he uttered the words, “It’s Sirius,” to Remus, the boy had popped up out of the fireplace and rushed to Sirius’ side. Peter took a bit longer, considering he had to make sure his parents knew where he was going. Remus simply sent them an owl, saying,
“It’s too important for me to wait. They’ll understand.”
They did, thankfully, understand, and the next day they dropped off Remus’ things at the Potter’s. They were offered a room to stay in, but declined.
“We don’t want to crowd the poor boy,” Hope explained.
Remus was frantic the entire time Sirius was unconscious; a few days. He would wake up in a cold sweat and rush to his side, but considering he insisted on having a bed in the same room as Sirius, this wasn’t a very far journey.
Sirius woke up around three days after he had arrived, and in the middle of the night. Remus called for the healers immediately, and then kneeled by the bed.
“Do you need anything?” he had asked.
“Moony…” Sirius croaked, before promptly falling unconscious again.
Remus promptly fell into hysterics.
“What if he doesn’t wake up? What if they hurt him too much? Oh, those bastards. I’m going to– I’m gonna–”
He was cut off by Fleamont’s hand on his shoulder.
“Best not say something that could get you in trouble,” he advised.
Remus ground his teeth, but stayed silent.
One of the healers who was checking on Sirius jumped in, telling them, “It’s quite normal for this to happen, no need to worry! In fact, it means that he’s fairly well on his way to recovering completely!”
Remus didn’t seem convinced.
When James came in to check on him the next morning, he found Remus still awake. He was nodding off, but then his head would snap back up to watch Sirius.
“Mate, you need sleep,” James told him.
“But what if he wakes up again and I’m not there?” Remus sounded so desperate, so defeated, it broke James’ heart a little.
“How about I sit by his bed while you sleep, and if he wakes up, I’ll let you know.”
Remus nodded dejectedly and laid down to rest. James could tell he fell asleep immediately. He slept for nearly fourteen hours, which made James question how much sleep he had been getting over the past few days, even excluding the night before.
Sirius woke up a few more times over the next two days. He always did the same thing: ask for Remus, and then go back under.
The pattern was broken six days after he had first shown up at James’ house. He had startled awake, and said to a very surprised Remus,
“Hello, Moony. Do you think I could have some water?” Remus had stared at him in shock for several moments before exclaiming,
“He’s awake!” and promptly summoning a glass of water that he dropped, spilled all over himself, tried to clean up, and slipped and fell over. Sirius looked at him flustered on the floor, and began to laugh.
“Ow. Ow, ow,” he wheezed, clutching his side.
Remus glared at him. “I’m just trying to help. You don’t need to laugh.”
Sirius wiped away tears from the corners of his eyes, still slightly chuckling. “You always know how to make me feel better, don’t you Remus?”
#wolfstar#wolfstar microfic#microfic#marauders#sirius black#remus lupin#james potter#peter pettigrew#euphemia potter#fleamont potter#hope lupin#july 12#july 12th#dead gay wizards#marauders era#recovery
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James Potter always wanted to be the perfect friend. The one who will always be there for his friends. So, when, his best friend, Sirius Black, his other half, showed up in this living room in the middle of the night of boxers' day, James potter was there to take care of him.
It had always been like this, the two of them, along with Remus and Peter, against the World.
After being disowned, Sirius was sure that his brother would hate him, James knew it couldn't be true but Sirius believed Regulus was just like them.
Until Regulus showed up.
It wasn't during the night as Sirius. No, Regulus had showed up at the crack of dawn. James had just woken up for his morning runs when he saw a figure approaching the gates of Potter Manor.
-
Euphemia Potter loved kids. Not only hers, but every kid she saw. She wanted them to be happy, and she was always ready to fight for their happiness.
So when Sirius had shown up, and a year later Regulus too, she gave them a home and a family. She tried her best to be there. Though it seemed James had already taken the role happily. She, of course, noticed how fast James and Regulus had gotten closer in the span of two months. She noticed how her son was able to just, calm down, when he was with Regulus. He was never as agitated with Regulus as he normally was. She didn't know if he knew that.
All she knew was that she was going to support all of her kids.
-
People at Hogwarts talked about the change in James, he didn't bully the Slytherins - or well, just Snivellus, really- nor did he pick any fights. The pranks were always a constant, but there was one thing that stood out amongst other things. James Potter was no longer going out of his way to impress Lily Evans.
Some thought it was another one of schemes, so some said that he's showing Evans how he has matured so that she would take him. Some even said that he had just simply moved on from her during the summer, or found another girl. It was only James who knew how it was all because of Regulus.
How his mere presence always calmed him, made him feel at peace. It was not about Lily Evans or any other girl. It was always about Regulus, and his eyes which always seemed to show more than his face ever did. It was Regulus, his sloppy curl that fell over his beautiful grey blueish eyes, and his smile. His smiles. His snarky remarks, his lovely voice. Just Regulus.
James knew, of course. He knew where his feelings were headed and he wanted- no. That wasn't right. That was not how it was supposed to go.
He was in Gryffindor, just like his dad. A quidditch captain, just like his dad. A Head boy, just like his dad. He was also supposed to marry his pretty, Hogwarts sweetheart, girlfriend, just like his dad. Regulus wasn't supposed to be in the picture. James was never supposed to fall for- no. It was going exactly as it should be.
Lily Evans had finally started to think of James as a human than a toerag. Wasn't that always the goal? To impress Lily, then why doesn't it feel complete to James? Why does it feel like a very important part is still missing from his life.
why
wasn't
it
enough?
It was Lily, who made the first move. Always the one to take the lead, she had asked him to a date in Hogsmeade. He said yes because , what else are you supposed to do? When your "dreamgirl" asks you out? So he did, and he did everything other thing you're supposed to do when a pretty girl is interested in you. They became the so called "Star couple" of Hogwarts. The Head boy and the Head girl, dating, in love, it was the epitome of cliche. But James wasn't, not really. It wasn't as if Lily didn't know, she knew that he loved her, really. Just, he was not in love with her, and she wasn't either. Maybe, she was getting there. It was hard for James to think of that.
It was the fall of 1979, when Frank and Alice got married. James had no idea what he was thinking when he asked Regulus if he wanted to go for a walk after the wedding, but Regulus was just so, so, so.. just.
Which is how they ended up walking in the woods a few hours later, talking.
"Sirius and Remus living together in Italy, Peter off to Asia, now that you've graduated, you'll be going to Paris and well, I'm not good like Lily so I'm grumpy," James said while walking down the path, not noticing the stiffening of Regulus' spine at the mention of Lily. He and Lily, they were on a break. Lily needed space to herself after her parents' death, to process everything without a relationship to handle. Everyone just thought they were over. Maybe James did too, maybe he wanted it to be true.
"You know," Regulus hesitated, "You don't have to stay here."
"Why?" James glanced at him, amusedly. "Are you saying I fuck off to some other country too?" Regulus looked at him, inhaling sharply, preparing to speak. James looks in his eyes, drowning with that one emotion. The one they aren't allowed to acknowledge. Immediately knowing what's about to happen, James started to shake his head.
"No." He choked out with tears welling up. "No, you- please don't. You don't get to do this, not now. Please"
"It's no use James, we've let it sit for too long. We've got to let it out..."
"No. no..."
"I've loved you ever since I knew what it was like to fall in love, James–"
"No, we don't have to–"
"I couldn't help it, Jamie. I couldn't– and you've been so good to me – I've tried to show it, to say it, but you wouldn't let me; now I'm going to make you hear and give me answer because I can't go one like this any longer." He glances at James to see him crying with his eyes closed, he was shaking his head.
"I've tried to save you from this – I thought- I thought you would understand," James said but Regulus went on, choosing to ignore him.
"I've hated myself or feeling like this, and I have worked so hard to make me worthy of you. I waited and waited and I never complained for I hoped you'd love me, thought I know I don't deserve you– I'm not half good enough–" James stopped him by moving forward, cupping his face with his hands.
"Yes, you are, you're a way too good for me; and I'm so grateful for you and–" James choked out as the tears returned to his eyes. They were both crying now, looking in each other's eyes– "God, Regulus, I'm so fucking proud of you, I don't understand how you don't see yourself the way i see you. I don't see why I... I can't love you as you want me to."
"You can't or you're too afraid to?" Regulus asked sharply, suddenly feeling the beast clawing at his heart.
"I can't change how I feel, Reggie. I'm sorry, I know- I know how unfair it is of me to say that– and just please, I- You're right, you know," James said, looking at him with heartbreak written across his face. "I am afraid, and you can't tell me that I have no reason to be."
Regulus backed away from him as if physically struck. "I can't love anyone else, Jamie." He cried softly.
"It would be a disaster, Regulus! We can't be – this. People are being killed for being like this, I– I can't do it." James didn't know what he was more afraid of; being in love with a boy or being in love with Regulus. All of the Gryffindor bravery in him had disappeared the moment he had realized– realized what exactly? That he was.. gay? No, but Lily... so gay-ish? Or that it was Regulus? The boy he was in love with?
"Just say yes, James Potter! Just say yes, that you love me because I know you fucking do. I've seen the way you look at me, James. I know that's not how you're supposed to look at your best friend's baby brother, so just fucking say it like the Gryffindor you are."
"I've tried to do that and I have failed. I can't say it truly, okay Regulus? I can't say that I will love you without fear so I will just no say it at all," He looked in his eyes, "And one day, Reggie? You'll see that I was right. You'll thank me for it–"
Regulus interrupted him angrily, "I'll be damned if I do!"
James continued without acknowledging him– "You'll find some lovely girl, who will love you and adore you, and make a fine wife for your fine house. I wouldn't. I'm- I'm a guy and when people will look at us as if we are freaks, you'll be ashamed of me, and we would quarrel– we can't help it, can we? Not even now! I'm loud and I'd hate those big ass bookshelves I know you're planning on getting and you'd hate my overbearing touches and we would be un--happy and wish we- wish we hadn't done this and- and everything will be awful!"
Regulus just nodded at him, glancing away and trying to go back up the hill "Anything else you want to add?'
"Nothing else just... I don't think I will ever marry," Because he doesn't. He thinks that maybe he and Lily will be together again, but he doesn't think that they will every marry. He doesn't think he even wants to be married, "I am happy as I am and I don't- I don't think I will ever love anyone the way I love y- the way- I don't think I will ever love someone enough to want to marry them."
Regulus has stopped walking now, staring him down with tear stained face with a sharp gleam in his eyes before he shook his head as if shaking himself out of his thoughts, "See, I think you will care for someone, and love them, and live and die for them, because that's who you are James. That's who you've always been. Maybe that'd be Lily, you now? I know you will, it's your way, and you will." He paused, looking him in the eye. "And I'll be there with you at every step."
"Reggie.. please," James whispers.
He straightens up and walks away. James cries and cries. His heart breaking and his body on fire. He feels lost, even though he is the one who broke both their hearts.
And well, Regulus was right, wasn't he?
#james potter#jegulus#marauders fandom#regulus black#marauders#james x regulus#sunseeker#gay#70s#dead gay wizards#oneshot#that one scene#from little women#with laurie and jo#yeah that one#its kinda sad#i kinda hate it#i worked way too hard on this
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Hey !
I love reading your posts , you are brilliant truly.
I would like to request an analysis of James potter and maybe his relationship with lily Evans.
Thank you so much for your time !
Hi!
Thank you so much! 💕 I love writing these analysis posts, and I'm so glad other people enjoy reading them!
Now, James and Lily Potter, I'll start by giving my biased opinion which is that I like them as characters (especially Lily, love her) and their relationship.
So without further ado:
James Potter's Childhood
So before the Pottermore article that revealed Fleamont and Euphemia existed, the common fanon parents of James were Charlus and Dorea, I'm going to go with Fleamont and Euphemia being his parents though. (I still sometimes prefer his parents to be Charlus and Dorea in fic, even though it makes less sense with what we know about James, as I'll mention later).
So what do we know about the Potter family?
We know they are pretty rich. Not Malfoy or Black level rich, but they have a substantial amount of money as shown repeatedly:
Griphook unlocked the door. A lot of green smoke came billowing out, and as it cleared, Harry gasped. Inside were mounds of gold coins. Columns of silver. Heaps of little bronze Knuts.
(PS, 57)
We also know, from Pottermore, that the Potters are relatively newer money, making a good portion of their wealth from Henry Potter’s potions business (James' grandfather).
We also know Potters are common enough members in the Wizengamont from Pottermore. I posed here that the Wizengamot seats pass down families, which will place the Potters as wealthy and influential in the wizarding community as a whole.
“My whole family have been in Slytherin,” he said. “Blimey,” said James, “and I thought you seemed all right!” Sirius grinned. “Maybe I’ll break the tradition. Where are you heading, if you’ve got the choice?” James lifted an invisible sword. “’Gryffindor, where dwell the brave at heart!’ Like my dad.” Snape made a small, disparaging noise. James turned on him. “Got a problem with that?”
(DH, 567)
We know from James his father was in Gryffindor and probably his grandfather too. His distaste towards Slythering and anything resembling Dark Magic probably came from home. The same way Draco came to Hogwarts with his notions of blood purity and how Slytherin was the best house because he was parroting his parents, James is the same. He is an 11-year-old shouting off whatever he hears at home.
This is why I mentioned Fleamont and Euphemia make more sense as James' parents. As much as I personally like the idea of his parents being Charlus and Dorea, it wouldn't make sense with what we see. Dorea was born a Black, which means James would likely know who Sirius is and would probably have different notions regarding Slytherin house if his mother was there...
James Potter, then, grew up as the only child of a rich and politically influential family of Gryffindors, he was spoiled and used to having anything he wanted whenever he wanted, which is clear from his behavior.
James yawned hugely and rumpled up his hair, making it even messier than it had been. Then, with a glance toward Professor Flitwick, he turned in his seat and grinned at a boy sitting four seats behind him.
(OotP, 642)
He is brilliant and he is aware of it. Lily refers to him as arrogant often before they start dating, and I have to agree with her assessment of the teenage James. James at 15 is lounging in his seat and feels untouchable. He is at the top of his own world, popular, rich, and brilliant. So of course he's arrogant, he feels like nothing could reach him.
Ron said, stopping mid-sentence at the look on Harry’s face. “Why are you grinning?” “I’m not,” said Harry quickly, looking down at his Transfiguration notes and attempting to straighten his face. The truth was that Ron had just reminded Harry forcibly of another Gryffindor Quidditch player who had once sat rumpling his hair under this very tree.
(OotP, 704)
But it isn't that simple. James chooses to appear unbothered and untouchable, and I do think he is prideful but not as arrogant as Lily and Snape make him out to be, even at 15. The reason I think that is the above passage. I never really saw anyone bring it up in association with James' character, but Harry mentions Ron messing up his hair as he brags about his Quidditch save in much the same way James did in the memory he saw. The reason this is interesting is that we know Ron, we know how insecure he is and that all this hair messing is show and bravado that isn't fully backed up.
And considering the parallels I already mentioned James having with Draco and will mention more of them later, I wonder if James really does have insecurities he covers up with pride and arrogance — something we see both Ron do (in the above scene) and Draco do in general.
James Potter, when it comes down to it, has more in common with Draco Malfoy than with Harry in terms of his personality and even character arc, down to some of the things he says:
“Who wants to be in Slytherin? I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?” James asked the boy lounging on the seats opposite him, and with a jolt, Harry realized that it was Sirius. Sirius did not smile.
-James Potter to Sirius Black, 1971 (DH, 567)
“Well, no one really knows until they get there, do they, but I know I’ll be in Slytherin, all our family have been — imagine being in Hufflepuff, I think I’d leave, wouldn’t you?”
-Draco Malfoy to Harry Potter, 1991 (PS, 58)
So James is spoiled, snobbish, and used to getting his way in everything, unlike Lily and Sirius, who grew up with siblings and were more used to having to share or give up their wants sometimes. James also feels the need to live up to certain expectations, he has to be the best (the way Draco thought he would be at Hogwarts), he needs to be popular and top of the class and a lot of his pride and confidence probably hinges on these external sources, his arrogance is superficial. I just can't see a character who has real self-confidence be shown in narrative parallels to either Ron "self-esteem issues" Weasley or Draco "Arrogance to Hide Weakness" Malfoy.
The Mauraders
We move on to James' time at Hogwarts. He gets sorted into Gryffindor and befriends the Mauraders. I kinda want to talk about their friendship dynamic a bit, because it is interesting.
We saw in the earlier quote from the train, that Sirius was the first of the Mauraders James met, and he was the closest to him out of the bunch. I'm going to talk more about Sirius and James' friendship later in this post as they are a separate entity from the Marauders. I mean, there's a reason everyone in PoA keeps mentioning James and Sirius in a single breath while Lupin is never brought up.
(I know the reason is so JKR could keep the reveal for later, but in universe, it's quite telling)
Now, from what we see of them, they have a very clear dynamic. James is the leader, and Sirius is his second and only real equal (academically and by popularity) who are the closest to each other. Then we have Remus, who is friends with them, but they don't take him or his concerns as seriously. Remus was usually afraid to speak up against James and Sirius because he felt he was expandable to the friend group, a feeling Peter shared, if even worse than Remus. James and Sirius didn't really treat Peter great:
“Put that away, will you?” said Sirius finally, as James made a fine catch and Wormtail let out a cheer. “Before Wormtail wets himself from excitement.” Wormtail turned slightly pink but James grinned. “If it bothers you,” he said, stuffing the Snitch back in his pocket. Harry had the distinct impression that Sirius was the only one for whom James would have stopped showing off.
(OotP, 645)
Sirius is the one James actually takes cues from and vice versa. Pettigrew is often belittled and made the butt of their jokes and Remus:
“I’m bored,” said Sirius. “Wish it was full moon.” “You might,” said Lupin darkly from behind his book.
(OotP, 345)
“How thick are you, Wormtail?” said James impatiently. “You run round with a werewolf once a month —” “Keep your voice down,” implored Lupin. Harry looked anxiously behind him again.
(OotP, 643)
Is treated friendlier than Peter, but not with the same respect James and Sirius reserve for each other. James mentions Remus is a werewolf in a crowded hall, Sirius endangered Remus' secret during The Prank. We see Sirius doesn't really take Remus' Lycanthropy as the serious concern it is for Remus. Obviously, Sirius gets better about it, but this is the dynamic of the Marauders the way we see them. It's a far cry from a healthy friend group, but they were teenagers, and teens actually do on occasion have these kinds of friend groups that you question if it can be called friendship (I know I've seen a few of these in my school). I think the adult Remus and Sirius we see in OotP are closer than they were in school, and the reason for that was the war and having no one else really, but this is a James meta and not a Mauraders in general meta, so I'll focus.
Prongs
Many in the fandom already talked about what a brilliant and insane feat of magic becoming animagi at 15 is. We know James was a prodigy in Transfiguration and other areas of magic as well considering his confidence regarding the DADA exam. What I want to talk about Prongs, in particular, is the symbolism of a stag as one's Animagus form.
I talked about this a little already here, but basically, stags and deers in general represent:
The cycle of life and death
Agility and grace
Bravery
Nobility
Stags additionally represent:
Masculinity
Authority
Leadership
Fatherhood
So, what does all this tell us about James?
Well, it tells us he is as Gryffindor as they come (Bravery & Nobility), the cycle of life & death is his connection to the Peverells and his own early demise. Agility and grace make sense as well if you take it to mean he was a talented and graceful dueler, which is very possible and even likely.
And then we have the stag-specific traits. These are traits I think James only grew into later in life and would've grown into more. I mean, he was always charismatic and had the ability to lead people, he was leading the Mauraders and was incredibly popular. But I think the traits of the stag with fatherhood and authority suggest maturity, something the young James definitely lacked. I think his Animagus, more than anything proves he did change, and would've continued growing into himself to truly become the stag if he was given a chance to grow old. Because stags are positive leadership, father figures, and authority, they are supposed to represent the noblest kinds of leaders they have the internal self-confidence James lacks. And if that is the animal that represents James, it means he had it in him to be what the stag represents.
Bullying and Maturity
Sirius said it well enough:
“Yeah,” said Harry, “but he just attacked Snape for no good reason, just because — well, just because you said you were bored,” he finished with a slightly apologetic note in his voice. “I’m not proud of it,” said Sirius quickly. Lupin looked sideways at Sirius and then said, “Look, Harry, what you’ve got to understand is that your father and Sirius were the best in the school at whatever they did — everyone thought they were the height of cool — if they sometimes got a bit carried away —” “If we were sometimes arrogant little berks, you mean,” said Sirius. Lupin smiled. “He kept messing up his hair,” said Harry in a pained voice. Sirius and Lupin laughed. “I’d forgotten he used to do that,” said Sirius affectionately. “Was he playing with the Snitch?” said Lupin eagerly. “Yeah,” said Harry, watching uncomprehendingly as Sirius and Lupin beamed reminiscently. “Well . . . I thought he was a bit of an idiot.” “Of course he was a bit of an idiot!” said Sirius bracingly. “We were all idiots!
(OotP, 670)
James was an awful bully, toward Snape:
“This’ll liven you up, Padfoot,” said James quietly. “Look who it is. . . .” Sirius’s head turned. He had become very still, like a dog that has scented a rabbit. “Excellent,” he said softly. “Snivellus.”
(OotP, 645)
“And stopped hexing people just for the fun of it,” said Lupin. “Even Snape?” said Harry. “Well,” said Lupin slowly, “Snape was a special case. I mean, he never lost an opportunity to curse James, so you couldn’t really expect James to take that lying down, could you?” “And my mum was okay with that?” “She didn’t know too much about it, to tell you the truth,” said Sirius. “I mean, James didn’t take Snape on dates with her and jinx him in front of her, did he?”
(OotP, 671)
And even toward Peter, who Sirius and James constantly belittle:
“How thick are you, Wormtail?” said James impatiently. “You run round with a werewolf once a month —”
(OotP, 643)
I mentioned above how the 15-year-old James wasn't really the embodiment of the stag just yet, like Sirius said they were idiots. Sure, Harry rightfully calls them out that it isn't a good excuse for anything they did, but Harry is a very mature 15-year-old.
As for what motivated his bullying?
Honestly, I think it wasn't all that dissimilar to Draco, in terms of motivations at least. I mentioned above how James' conception of himself is tied to his being at the top, the most popular, the most talented, the top student. One way to feel at the top is to put others down. Most of his bullying was probably fueled by this need to assure himself he is better and assert control (but, more on that later).
I don't think Snape should forgive James or any of the Mauraders or anything like that, not at all, what they did to him was awful and the fact James continued seeking him out even after he mostly dropped the bullying makes it so much worse.
But at the same time, I tend to believe Sirius, Remus, and Lily about him changing, that, given time, he would've matured even more:
“Look,” he said, “your father was the best friend I ever had, and he was a good person. A lot of people are idiots at the age of fifteen. He grew out of it.”
(OotP, 671)
I'm a big believer that people can and do change over time, especially teenagers. Life experiences change who you are, especially big and traumatic occasions, and James encountered one hell of a life experience to kick-start his growth and maturity:
The first wizarding war
I won't go into the full detail on what happened in the war but I want to talk about how the war changed James.
I discussed the progression of the first war as part of my analysis of Voldemort here and when James and Lily went into hiding here. Now, the Marauders were in school between September of 1971 and June of 1978. As I mentioned in the Voldemort analysis post I linked, the war really started getting bad, the first casualties, were in 1975 when the minister of magic was replaced. This makes James and the Mauraders 5th or 6th years when the war truly begins. I personally think this was late in 1975, as in November or December when the Minister was booted from office, aligning well with James' change.
What I think this was for him is a moment the rug was pulled from under him.
I think, the same way the second war showed Draco who he is as a person, that he doesn't want to hurt and torture, not even muggleborns, the first war was the same for James. He learned about himself and his own priorities. He just learned different things than Draco because James is very much willing to hurt and probably kill for what he thinks is just and for the people he cares for. He can be cruel and ruthless.
The wizarding world is an incredibly small community, with this kind of small population that almost all work together (the ministry) when someone dies, especially someone important (I believe the first deaths were high in the ministry or even Wizengamont members) it rattles everything. For James, who felt his skill, money, and status made him practically untouchable, this is a slap in the face. This to him starts his journey to see he is not above anyone else and he is just like anyone else — can die and hurt like everyone else.
War, even when you aren't on the front lines, even just hearing that Mr. Whatever's brother was killed and your old neighbors who moved away lost their son — it doesn't leave you unscathed. It forces you to confront how little control over certain aspects of life you actually have. And in a community so small that every death is someone you at least knew in passing or knew someone who knew — every death hits hard. Every death feels too close to home.
I think this is part of why James continued bullying Snape even after his change in approach. It wasn't out of the same arrogance as before, now it's by a need to feel in control. To hurt a familiar enemy that represents the Death Eaters to feel a semblance of stability under his feet. I think, this was part of what motivated James, a roundabout justice against the Death Eaters at large when he felt powerless. So he took it on whoever he could — in this case, Snape.
I'm not trying to justify it, I'm just explaining what I think motivated James and why he would do that if he was in the process of changing for the better.
All of this gives James ample motivation to join the Order, after all, he wants to hit back against the Death eaters, he wants to feel balanced and in control again. So he probably jumped at the opportunity to join the Order.
The Order of the Phoenix
We don't know much about what James did in the Order, and it doesn't matter too much for the sake of analysis. We know he joined at graduation, so, June 1978. I also mentioned in the aforementioned post how the war got worse in 1979, which means that before he went into hiding, James was probably involved in a few skirmishes in the war when it was already at its peak.
We also know James and Lily got married incredibly early, almost immediately after graduating. That too, is probably influenced by the war. After all, war can either speed up life events or slow them down, depending on various factors among which is the optimism of the people involved. James and Lily getting married and pregnant in the middle of the war tell us something about their characters — it tells us they were incredibly optimistic and hopeful for the future. They got married and had Harry in the hope and belief that the war would be over soon enough and Harry would grow up in a better world. That is what they believed in and I think this is just, really interesting.
Then they went into hiding, and we know what happened from there. There are two things I want to mention about this period in hiding in regards to James' character.
First, James' first choice was Sirius, Sirius is the one to convince him to choose Pettigrew instead:
“Harry . . . I as good as killed them,” he croaked. “I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment, persuaded them to use him as Secret-Keeper instead of me. . . . I’m to blame, I know it. . . .
(PoA, 365)
As I mentioned above, the Mauraders looked down on Pettigrew. I think the plan always was to tell everyone Sirius was the secret keeper so he'd draw the fire and torture and potential death, so the real secret keeper, and the secret, would remain safe even if he was killed for it (which is a sad thought, but that's about Sirius).
Pettigrew was chosen by Sirius for how unassuming he is, Sirius is so ready to sacrifice his life for his friends that he couldn't fathom Pettigrew wouldn't do the same. James didn't choose Pettigrew because of his faith in him as a friend the way Voldemort implies, no, I think James chose Pettigrew because of his faith in Sirius. If Sirius said its a good idea, then it was a good idea to James.
Second, is this quote:
James is getting a bit frustrated shut up here, he tries not to show it but I can tell
(DH, 158)
There are two things I want to unpack in this one sentence (I do love doing that).
James, quite similar to Sirius in OotP, doesn't like being cooped up away from the action. He hates not being out there for very similar reasons to Sirius. He loathes feeling useless like he isn't doing anything to help while people are dying. While his friends are risking their lives. James, at his core, is a person who cares deeply for the people he considers his, he would feel incredible guilt sitting safely behind magical protections while they were in danger.
Lily says James is trying to hide how frustrated he actually is, this is significant, why? Well because the 15-year-old version of James who complained easily about being a little bored wouldn't have hid his complaints. He would have voiced them to anyone willing to listen. The fact he isn't doing that shows some of his growth and maturity, it shows he is self-aware enough about the situation that he knows he shouldn't be the one complaining considering he and his family are safe. He still feels frustrated for the above reasons, but he tries to be considerate and keep things at home with Lily as intense as he can in the way he thinks is best. He is actively trying, and I think that's important.
Now, James has two important relationships that really define his character for me. Sirius and Lily.
Quite the Double Act
I adore James and Sirius's friendship honestly, they were each other's most important person and I can't really talk about James without talking about Sirius (as seen in this entire post), after all, no one in the books seems able to operate these two when talking about them in POA:
“Naturally,” said Madam Rosmerta, with a small laugh. “Never saw one without the other, did you? The number of times I had them in here — ooh, they used to make me laugh. Quite the double act, Sirius Black and James Potter!”
(PoA, 204)
Sirius and James met on the train at the age of 11 and couldn't be separated since (well, until death, that is). They are the heart of the Mauraders as a friend group and I've seen some other blogs bring up already how unhinged their friendship was:
This is a two-way mirror. I’ve got the other. If you need to speak to me, just say my name into it; you’ll appear in my mirror and I’ll be able to talk in yours. James and I used to use them when we were in separate detentions.
(OotP, 858)
They literally invented an advanced magical communication method so they wouldn't have to go an hour without talking to each other. When we see them finishing the exam in SWM, the first person they look at is each other and communicate with no words that the exam was great.
These two are just, on the same wavelengths. I had a friend in high school who, when we would talk to other people, and she'd be unsure how to say something so she'll just turn to me, communicate a whole ass concept in eye contact alone, and then I'll explain it aloud to whoever we were talking to. I am convinced James and Sirius were like that too, where they didn't even need to talk to understand each other, they just knew.
For them the answer to "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" was always "Yes" or "Now I do"
Sirius was the best man at James' wedding, Harry's godfather and he still held a special place for James, to the point Lily was very aware of it:
If you could visit, it would cheer him up so much.
(DH, 158)
I mean, I don't know of many friendships like this, where the guy's wife asks his best friend over because they were apart for too long and getting antsy. I mean, it is bizarre.
In my head, if there wasn't a war, Sirius would've probably practically moved in with James and Lily. Sure, he had his own apartment, but you'd rarely ever find him there.
During the war it was too risky, James and Lily were in hiding and Sirius was doing missions for the Order, but again, if there wasn't a war, I think Sirius and James would've still been joined at the hip way into adulthood.
Sirius is one of the only two people James would ever take cues from no questions asked. I just, love them, okay.
Head Boy and Head Girl
Now, to James' second most important relationship: Lily.
James' crush on Lily started pretty early in their school years. We know it wasn't quite a love-at-first-sight as in the meeting on the train we don't really see any of it. I would guess his crush on her started growing as he got to know her as a housemate. I think James liked how smart and talented Lily was. James considers himself the best, his best friend is also the best, a top student, handsome and popular — his crush would be the same. Lily's kindness, likeability, and intelligence were huge turn-ons for him, not just the fact she was gorgeous (but that too).
I want to talk about this quote:
then back at James, who was now doodling on a bit of scrap parchment. He had drawn a Snitch and was now tracing the letters L. E. What did they stand for?
(OotP, 642)
This is adorable. James is a romantic guy, he was doodling Lily's initials on a spare parchment. I bet he wrote out "Lily Potter" in hearts and everything. I find it hilarious and adorable and it both shows he had a crush on her, but it also shows a really dorky and romantic side that no one (of the characters we meet) mentions because they probably haven't seen it. Well, Sirius probably did, but he doesn't really get many chances to talk to Harry about James unfortunately.
Sirius mentions that they went out on dates (something Harry and Ginny don't really do), and with James doodling Lily's initials I bet they were super cheesy and romantic. He'll take her out to picnics and light candles and carve their initials in a heart on a tree.
If they lived to raise Harry, they'd be the kind of parents who had a weekly date night and left their kids with Sirius for the evening.
“I didn’t mean—I just don’t want to see you made a fool of—He fancies you, James Potter fancies you!” The words seemed wrenched from him against his will. “And he’s not. . . everyone thinks. . . big Quidditch hero—” Snape’s bitterness and dislike were rendering him incoherent, and Lily’s eyebrows were traveling farther and farther up her forehead. “I know James Potter’s an arrogant toerag,” she said
(DH, 569)
Now, about some of the downsides of their relationship.
Yeah, James was persistent in flirting with Lily for years before she agreed to go out with him. He bullied her best friend and acted like an idiot. She considered him an "arrogant toerag" which isn't very complementary.
That being said, even when she calls him out, she still defends him to Snape in the above conversation. While Lily disapproved of James' behavior, I don't think she ever really hated him, not the way Snape did. She didn't like how he was acting, but she didn't hate him:
“Oh, well, he always made a fool of himself whenever Lily was around,” said Sirius, shrugging. “He couldn’t stop himself showing off whenever he got near her.” “How come she married him?” Harry asked miserably. “She hated him!” “Nah, she didn’t,” said Sirius. “She started going out with him in seventh year,” said Lupin. “Once James had deflated his head a bit,” said Sirius.
(OotP, 671)
I think Sirius is right about this for the reasons I mentioned above. Lily never really hated James, just thought he was an idiot (rightfully so) and once he got less arrogant, she was more willing to date him.
I think their relationship wasn't a bad one, I think they did love each other and mostly got along really well. I think Lily liked James' sense of humor after it mellowed out a bit and she liked that he's smart and talented. I think James liked Lily's calmness and intelligence and how much she cared for people.
Yeah, they probably argued about a lot of stupid things (I think they enjoyed their stupid arguments and barbs on occasion not unlike Ron and Hermione), but overall, I do like their relationship, I think they balanced each other out. James pushes Lily to allow herself to be a little silly, and Lily can put James in his place when he is being an idiot or needlessly cruel. And they are both incredibly smart and compassionate people... whenever I think about them it kinda makes me sad they didn't get to raise Harry. That Harry wouldn't have such a low view of himself, he'll probably have younger siblings, be used to having Sirius (and Remus too, to a lesser degree) around constantly, he would've been the top student in practically everything... I mean, he'd have a different set of issues, I'm sure, but, I don't know, I just made myself sad.
The fandom is pretty split on James, some talk about him as if he's some flawless sunshine child, which isn't the case. Yes, James is loyal, brave, and compassionate, but he can be cruel and ruthless and he uses arrogance as a mask for his insecurities and need to be great (I think James Potter could be a Slytherin, tbh). But on the flip side, some fans consider him nothing but a bully, and I tend to give him more credit than that. I think he was always more than that, but I believe Sirius, Remus, and Lily that he did change, and he probably would have continued to improve to become the brave and compassionate leader the stag represents if he had lived longer.
This post turned out way longer than I expected it to, but, here you go, James Potter's analysis of the top of my head.
#harry potter#hp#hp meta#harry potter meta#james potter#lily potter#lily evans#sirius black#first wizarding war#the order of the phoenix#asks#staggardaggar#the mauraders
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Euphemia and James - Writer's Notes
Earlier this year I wrote a fic titled "Euphemia and James," a story exploring Euphemia Potter and infertility. This is the most deeply personal story I've ever written, and it took a few weeks to write it because of the emotions it stirred up for me, but honestly, being able to write this took years of processing emotions. I decided to share some of my notes on this fic in this post, and it includes this lovely cover image from @livelaughlovetoread. This story is also unique in that it's written in second person POV. It wasn't intended to come out that way, but that's how it came out. See below the image for my notes:
Euphemia and James came from these lines from the extra-canonical writings on Pottermore/whatever they call it these days:
"[Fleamont] sold the company at a vast profit when he retired, but no amount of riches could compensate him or his wife Euphemia for their childlessness. They had quite given up hope of a son or daughter when, to their shock and surprise, Euphemia found that she was pregnant and their beloved boy, James, was born."
If you don't know anything about infertility, I envy you somewhat. Studies have shown that a diagnosis or experience of infertility is similar to receiving a cancer diagnosis or losing a close loved one. It took me a while to realize that a lot of the feelings I had surrounding infertility was actually grief and mourning.
So, I put it all into this fic. There are a few points I want to highlight, if you decide to read the fic or want to see some lines, and my feelings around it all:
"When you meet Fleamont Potter a year into your job at the apothecary, you have no intention of marrying him."
I more or less shamelessly wrote Euphemia and Fleamont's relationship to be similar to mine with Mr C. In fact, Mr C aka @rawr-gorg-smash read this work and we were both sobbing messes by the end of it.
"It will happen when it happens, they say. It will come when you least expect it, they say. That’s what everyone says, and you’re ready to punch the next person in the face who tells you to just “relax.”"
Infertile people will get advice like this frequently. It's meant to be helpful or sometimes soothing, I think, but all too often it's an empty hope. Sometimes, bodies just don't work right, no matter how much relaxing you do.
"It’s not polite to ask. Everyone knows where magical, adopted children come from. They are Muggleborn children who are delicately extracted from their birth homes and replaced with Squibs, or sometimes not replaced at all."
This part is world building by me - the idea of adoption in a magical world seemed odd to me. How would infertile magical couples adopt if they can't use potions or charms? I wouldn't put it past them to just take a Muggleborn child, modify memories, and go. I won't touch on real world adoption-there's a lot to unpack there-but this idea gave me some thoughts on magical adoption.
"It seems selfish to want more, when you already have so much. You question, for the first time in your life, if you really want a child."
I have heard people say things to this effect: it's so selfish to want your 'own' children or to want children and bring them into this world, or some variation of that. If this is what you believe, you and I are going to disagree and I'm not going to try to convince you otherwise. But it's something I and many other infertile people have considered. The thing is, people have had children and will continue to have children throughout terrible periods of time. Does it make sense? Not necessarily. Human actions don't always make sense. To me, though, it speaks of hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, for a world that we will build that will be better for the next generation.
"Now you wish for a living child. There are no longer any expectations on your baby or the kind of person they’ll be. You want a living, breathing baby in your arms you can dote on, educate, feed, and guide through life."
I'll say that one of the few silver linings of infertility for me has been re-grounding my expectations of what kind of child I might have. It once was wishing for a boy or girl, or a kid who likes to read, or a kid who won't be into extreme sports, but now it's just a kid I want. I want to love them because they exist. That's all.
"It’s a shame that you only got nineteen years with your son, the one you wished had been born twenty years prior, so you could treasure twice as long with him."
One of my fears for having children later in life is not having enough time with them. Then again, young parents die. Even children die. If nothing else, whatever time I do have, I hope I use it to love whatever family I have to the fullest.
That's all I have for now. If you made it this far, read the fic, commented on it, left kudos, or a bookmark, thank you very kindly for your time. Of all the things I've written, this felt most like putting a piece of my heart into the world.
#euphemia potter#fleamont potter#james potter#euphemia x fleamont#cw infertility#infertility#cw pregnancy#pregnancy
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Exist for Love (Chapter 1)
James Potter x Reader
Chapter Warnings: reader is a child in this but is going to age up very quickly in the coming chapters
Word Count: ~2,000
Chapter 2
Your childhood was what you would consider a lonely one. You’d only ever had one friend, and it wasn’t for lack of trying. You tried to be a very social and friendly little girl, but your playdates with others were limited in order to keep you safe. The children of your parents’ close family friends were to be the pool of children you could select from.
You gave your parents and servants quite a fright every time you ran outside the manor’s stony walls to peer through the gate at passerby, wanting to make friends with each and every one. You shouldn’t have felt lonely, though. The aforementioned close family friends had very many children, but to you it felt like slim pickings.
There was, of course, the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black (or so they called themselves), with several children around your age. There was Narcissa, a stoic and cold child. You always felt she’d been jealous of your status, even as young as you were. Then there was Bellatrix, a girl who gave you a sense of unease you could never shake. It was something about her unhinged smile and cruel treatment towards the servants. Then there were the mysterious brothers Regulus and Sirius, whom you saw very infrequently. Sirius was to be the head of the family at his coming of age, and Regulus was a very quiet and clever boy. You gathered though, after a bit of eavesdropping, that Sirius was a rather troubled child.
Your parents were also very close with the Weasley family. There were three boys, and though Arthur was near your age, he was quite an odd one. Always wandering out into the world to spend time with the people of the kingdom. You were green with envy, of course. You’d only ever wished to leap over the gates surrounding your home and spend time with others.
Last, but most certainly not least, were the Potter family. Euphemia and Fleamont were perhaps the most trusted of your parents’ friends. Their son James was your most cherished treasure. Though treasures were something you had so many of, James was unique and indispensable.
From an early age you’d shown an interest in each other. You would most definitely say that James was your best friend. You spent what your parents considered an indecent amount of time together, but how could you not? Every moment with him felt like you were laying on soft grass, the sun kissing your cheeks, content.
Though, you knew you couldn’t always continue on playing with James every day. You had very many responsibilities as the only child of your parents. They were unable to conceive again after you, and therefore you were the crown princess. With no other alternatives.
But you thought you would have more time with him than you would actually have. Because at age eleven, along with many of the other children you were ‘allowed’ to spend time with, he went to a special boarding school.
“Why can’t I go?” You’d had this conversation before, but nothing had ever felt so unfair as this. Your peers were all going to boarding school, you were being separated from your Jamie, all the while you had to stay and be educated within the grounds.
“You have a different set of skills you need to hone, your highness. Boarding school isn’t fun anyway,” your tutor was trying to placate you. He was a scholar from the Malfoy family. A wealthy noble family you didn’t much care for.
“I don’t want to learn about politics and etiquette! I want to learn about the stars, maths, and philosophy!” You complained, and your tutor raised his eyebrows at you.
“You hate mathematics, I would know,” you pouted at his words and resisted the urge to run your fingers through your hair in frustration. Your lady-in-waiting would have your hide for ruining the updo she put together. And your mother would have it for acting childish.
“But I am a child,” you’d told her one time, at which point your father scolded you for talking back to your mother.
And so, the year you turned eleven was the beginning of your blue period. Because you, like the great artists of the world all did, were experiencing a great deal of mourning and internal turmoil. You were facing nearly nine months without your best friend, with a short break where he would come back for the holidays.
In those first few weeks you were inconsolable, you were lonely, and all you did was study and attend meals. Your bodyguard, a distant member of the Longbottom family (and a man thirty years your senior), was the only person who could cheer you up. Between etiquette, maths, and family history lessons, he would give you lessons of his own. It wasn’t something you thought your mother would be happy about, but Charles’ literal only job was to keep you safe. So, he gave you self-defense lessons.
“You’re eleven now, just a wee thing really, so you can’t do much damage. What’s our number one rule?” He would ask you.
“Flight, not fight.” You recited dutifully, before quickly spouting the part you’d forgotten: “And call for help!”
“And our second?”
“If I must fight, I will do so with the goal of being able to flee.”
“And if you are unable to flee?”
“Then I have to fight for my life, no matter what.”
“That’s good, princess. Now, today we’re going to work on conditioning. How many times can you run around the east wing?”
You thought for a moment, heart beating excitedly.
“My record is eight, but I think I could do more!” Charles grinned at you.
“That’s a good start, princess. But I bet James could run around it twelve times,” you gasped at his bold statement.
“He could not! I always beat him in running contests!” You were red in the face, the picture of indignant, when Charles leaned in close as if to whisper something secret.
“You don’t think he’s been… letting you win? Do you?”
And so the autumn passed by.
You felt as if you were a spy living a double life, learning pretty princess politics and language arts and filling out your schedule with planned events and lessons… And in between them learning how to defend yourself. It was thrilling, but it couldn’t compare to the deepening loneliness you felt without James near you.
Your mother attempted to set you up to spend time with the younger generation of the Black family, but you knew they would be attending this magical boarding school in the next few years as well, so it wasn’t worth pursuing.
When the holiday season started nearing, snow settling quietly on the roof and warm soups filling your belly, you began to feel nervous about Jamie returning. What if he had found new friends? Well of course he would have friends, but what if he’d forgotten about you? How would you cope? What would you do if by the time his summer break came ‘round you no longer had a single friend?
These horrible thoughts were all running through your head as your lady-in-waiting tied you into a dark jewel-toned velvet dress.
“You look lovely, your highness,” she was a few years older than you, still a girl really. She had beautiful skin, a color somewhere between yours and Jamie’s, and long curly hair. You could only hope to grow up as beautiful as she.
She ushered you out of the dressing room and out into the hall where Charles awaited you.
“Ready, princess?” he grinned like he knew a secret, and you were highly suspicious it had to do with the gathering your parents were holding. A gathering of many of the noble houses to kick off the holiday season, and renew their friendships. Many of the heads of houses were very busy and didn’t come by the estate often. You weren’t excited to see all of them, but it did mean you would get to see James. It had only been a few months but it felt like a lifetime.
So when you stepped into the dining hall, expecting to see a dozen or so guests… You stopped short. Instead of the grand tables your parents would bring out for large gatherings there was an intimate table set for six.
Seated at the table were your parents, Euphemia and Fleamont Potter, and your Jamie, face split open into the widest grin you could have imagined.
Your mother had a coy smile on her face, and your father rolled his eyes lovingly.
“Well go on, I suppose a hug is in order,” he laughed as you threw yourself towards the table, and towards James. He stood just in time to catch you and throw his arms around you.
“Oh, I’ve missed you James,” you wished you could cry, but you knew it was unbecoming to do so, especially when hugging a boy. Which was usually something you were told not to do. But, you supposed this was a special occasion.
“And I’ve missed you, princess,” he was still smiling, you could hear it in his voice. There were rules to be observed though, so you parted from his arms (though you were loath to do so) and straightened out your skirt.
Your dinner was lovely and joyful, both your and James’ parents sending their two young children indulgent smiles as the night went on. James told you a little about school, but you would have a few weeks to learn more.
“Could we go for a short walk outside?” James asked your parents after dessert was served. “With Charles of course,” he added hastily.
With the permission from both your parents, and with Charles’ supervision, you and James grabbed your winter coats and stepped outside.
James seemed to know where he wanted to go, leading you towards the gardens. Once you were surrounded by snow-laden bushes and pretty winter blooms, he brushed off a bench and gestured for the two of you to sit down.
You were sure your nose was red with the cold, but James had reminded you to wear your mittens and earmuffs.
“I wanted to tell you about what I learned, and I couldn’t do it inside,” he was throwing that huge grin at you again, and you couldn’t help but smile back. “I’ve been taking astrology classes, and I wanted to show you all the constellations that are out tonight,” his cheeks were reddening, with cold or possibly with emotion, you weren’t sure. But at the mention of constellations you brightened. You always wanted to learn about the stars.
As Charles stood by, you stared up into the darkness and listened as James told you a story about the Greeks and the stars. He was animated, gesturing and pointing them all out for you.
“Two of my roommates are in my astronomy class as well, though we’re always getting caught up in mischief. You know me,” he laughed a little at himself and you nudged his shoulder with your own.
“You? Mischief? There’s no way,” you joked, eyes lingering on the snowflakes in his eyelashes and hair as he laughed. He was a lovely sight, and the art lessons you’d taken reminded you of the word: chiaroscuro. A contrast between light and dark.
“You two must be cold, why don’t we head back inside?” Charles piped up from behind you, and you felt your bottom lip wobble as you thought about parting with James again. But you reminded yourself that crying wasn’t to be done in front of others. So when James stood and offered a gloved hand to you, you took it and allowed him to help you up. Again, you were loath to let go of him, but you forced your fingers to loosen their grip on him.
“I’ll come back soon. You’ll see me again before I head back to school. I still have to tell you all about my roommates!” He really seemed to take to his new friends, but you were happy that he hadn’t forgotten you.
Unfortunately, you wouldn’t see him again before he left, as you were taken with a fever soon after the holiday passed and weren’t able to see anybody outside of Charles and your family for several weeks.
You did begin to write him letters though, writing about everything and nothing. The only secret you had from him was your lessons from Charles.
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"Dark Mark" Jegulus Oneshot
Prompt by @jegulus-microfic (prompt: praise)
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Regulus stood in the middle of the room, his arm in agonizing pain, while his family praised him and their lord, and all Regulus could think about is how he betrayed James.
The Dark Mark shown brightly against the contrast of Regulus's pale skin; it made Regulus want to be sick, but he couldn't help but think of all that this mark stood for and be the tiniest of bits proud.
Then he though about James.
About what James going to say when he saw.
All the proudness and hints of happiness disappeared when he thought about how James was going to hate him for this.
His one love, the man who gave him so much joy and light in this hell, his sun - was going to hate him; for something he had no choice in.
Just as Bellatrix was about to tell him some more bullshit and give him more undeserved praise, Regulus left the room, not saying another word, and locks himself in his room.
Sirius had long fled this house, so he couldn't even go to them about this.
The one person who was ever nice to him, had left.
. . .
James walked to his front door, hearing someone ring the doorbell and thinking it was post.
He opened it, and stopped dead in his tracks as he saw who it was.
It was not the postman.
"Hey, Jamie... Uh.. May I come in..?"
James doesn't hesitate a moment to wrap Regulus in a tight hug.
"Oh my god, Reggie, oh my god- of course you can come in, you know you are always welcome. Oh my gods, I can't believe its you.."
"'Always welcome'.. Doubtful, once I tell you what I've become," Regulus thought to himself bitterly, but says nothing of the sort and forces the bitterness out of his words.
"Thanks, James.."
James basically drags Regulus inside after hugging him so tightly.
"Mum, Dad, Pads! Reggie is here!!" James called into the quiet house.
Fleamont and Euphemia Potter came into the room, but not before Sirius ran into the room and jaw dropped once she saw his brother again.
"Reg..?" Sirius's voice cracks as he steps out to see Regulus, not quite sure if this is even real, or if she was just dreaming.
"Hi Sirius."
The two hesitate a moment before hugging each other; it was probably the first time Sirius was able to hug Regulus since they were very little.
"Hello, Regulus, I hope you know you are welcome to stay as long as you want to," Effie says after Sirius and Regulus are done hugging; Sirius's eyes are red from trying not to cry (and failing).
"Thank you," Regulus says gratefully to James's parents, but somewhere inside him he knew that this generosity would be all but a memory once they found the mark on his arm, that was still burning from the recent inking.
"James could we talk for a minute, alone?" Regulus asks James in an undertone so only he could hear.
"Yeah, sure, come on, I'll show you to your room."
James takes Regulus's hand as they walk up the stairs, leaving the others behind.
James makes a mental note of how cold Regulus's hands were compared to last time he was able to hold them.
They both walk into the spare guest room, and Regulus closes the door behind the both of them.
"So what did you want to talk about?"
Regulus takes a deep breath before speaking.
"Jamie, I want you to know that I love you-"
"I love you too, Reggie!"
"I haven't finished.."
James's face falls, and he looks at Regulus curiously who continues to speak.
"I love you, and I really hope you do too, and I really want you to know that I had no choice.." Regulus says, his voice getting quieter but he keeps his eyes on James's as he reluctantly rolls up his sleeve.
His arm was red from irritation from the mark; the Dark Mark plastered black ink over his forearm.
"I am so sorry, Jamie-"
James says nothing, just stares in shock and horror at the Dark Mark on his lover's skin, while Regulus was willing himself not to let any tears slip.
James reaches out after a few moments to grasp Regulus's arm, his thumb just barely grazing over the black ink.
"I still love you Reggie. I just.. I just don't know what we are going to do now."
-
[Word count: 704]
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can you please do one with Indian reader and Indian James waltzing on main agar kahoon?? They're bestfriends who Love eachother romantically and kinda steamy and while they are dancing everyone is just looking at them in aw
main agar kahoon
indian!james potter x indian!fem!reader word count: 762
a/n: ty for this request i rlly enjoyed writing this, i love giving representation to our desi girls
James Potter was well known in the desi wizarding community not only because of the wealth that the Potters had maintained throughout the wizarding ages but also because he was one of the most sought-after bachelors by the Indian mothers in Britain however only one girl ever captured his eyes. James had known you since your family moved next to his family when he was only 3 years old. Ever since you both had become fast friends, bonding over your shared heritage and constantly never having anyone around your ages at family functions and prayers you attended.
This year you had both attended the Potter’s annual ball they held, and upon Aunty Effie’s insistence it was going to be a cultural ball which meant you and James had both shown up together in ethnic wear. Showing up in a blue lehenga you stood out amongst most of your friends and in James’ eyes you stood out in front of everyone, he could never really wrap his head around the idea that you truly were his girl. James wore, in your opinion, an extremely well fitted black kurta which showed his assets off well.
You arrived with your parents and once they left to say hi to everyone they hadn’t seen since the last ball you made your way to your boyfriend and his friends who were dressed in more modern clothes such as tuxes and dresses. James’ eyes basically resembled hearts as you walked up to him and before you could reach them, he had bent down to press a kiss on your cheek. Saying hello to all of your friends they all complimented your outfit and makeup whilst James stood off smiling happy to show you off to both of your friends.
As Euphemia and Fleamont welcomed everyone to the ball they announced that the family would soon open with a waltz which was an annual tradition. You were always excited to participate ever since you and James first met, normally it would only be Euphemia and Fleamont dancing with little James standing in the middle of them, however since James had met you, he would continuously invite you to dance and you two would twirl and sway in the middle while Effie and Monty danced around you two. That changed after Sirius and Regulus ran away, you would normally slow dance with Reg while James and Sirius swayed in the middle looking like idiots, but you knew they wouldn’t have it any other way. Slowly as years passed the ballroom grew bigger for everyone to fit.
This year was no different as it would now be Effie and Monty, you and James, Sirius and Remus and Regulus and Barty. The opening chords of the song started and you and James both excitedly looked at each other, you had both watched Om Shanti Om more times than you could count, and you could not wait to dance to the song.
James slowly led you to the dance floor and you both took your positions as you waited for the song to start. James gazed into your eyes as the song started and you both floated effortlessly around one another, twirly in synchronised harmony and steps in perfect time all without looking away from each other. Soon sounds in the background had faded away and it was only you and James in the moment as he mouthed the words to you.
Out of the corner of your eye you had seen some of the family step off of the dance floor to watch you and James and some part of you wanted to stop dancing completely out of embarrassment however almost as if James knew what you were thinking he moved his hand from your shoulder to your chin to make you look at him, his blinding smile alone had quelled any anxiety bubbling in your chest. As the song picked up again you both continued to dance whilst hearing your friends softly cheering you both on any time you passed them, you were sure your feet were going to hurt after this but in the moment all you could see was the sun, its beautiful rays basking you in sunlight and warmth.
As you felt the song ending, James and you slowed down before he twirled and dipped you as the big finale before ending it with a kiss. You could hear claps and cheers around the both of you before you both pulled away to look at your friends and family who looked so softly at the both of you.
#juliwrites#harry potter#marauders#james potter#remus lupin#sirius black#james potter x reader#bartylus#wolfstar#james potter fluff#james potter x you#james potter x girlfriend!reader#james potter x indian!reader#fem!indian!reader
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"Harry Potter? Who's that? Oh, a random child raised by abusive relatives? That's a pity, I'm sure sooner or later it'll get better for him <3"
Excuse me while I faceplant into a concrete wall hard enough to crack it.
Also we know literally 0 about her canon personality, what they're thinking about is fanon Euphemia. For all we know she could have believed Sirius guilty and left him to rot. Remus and Dumbles sure did.
I literally just saw a tiktok of a woman picking HP characters and which one she’d save and then all the comments were like “you can always tell they’re a potterhead when they call Uncle Moony (🤓🤓🤓) ‘Lupin’” and “picking this character over James (aka the guy who died a decade before the series began) is a crime” and “sometimes I forgot not everyone is a Marauders stan” (I see this comment ten times a day, like do Marauder stans just have no originality whatsoever??).
Like why do they refer to fans of Harry Potter as “ew omg Potterheads” as if that isn’t the series they’re creating literal non-existent personalities from?? 😭 Y’all aren’t superior “fans,” some of us actually like characters with screentime who’ve been mentioned more than twice in 7 books. <- We also actually know how old our “favourite characters!!” are; that concept must be so new for Marauder stans.
Honestly, I legitimately don’t have much of a problem with them creating personalities for characters (their insistence on one very specific interpretation is a bit of a red flag tho), but the problem is when they start acting like literal OCs are better than fleshed out, nuanced characters in canon and then acting like they’re superior to fans of the ACTUAL series. I literally love the Marauders era (the DEs + Snape and the Marauders) but WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE Y’ALL ARE PULLING OUT OF YOUR ASSES?? Exploring what little was shown of their characters and making valid headcanons of their personality is ofc okay… but straight up stealing the personalities of other characters in canon, giving their OCs all their qualities, and then acting like they’re somehow superior is downright insanity. 🤠
Also we know literally 0 about her canon personality, what they're thinking about is fanon Euphemia. For all we know she could have believed Sirius guilty and left him to rot. Remus and Dumbles sure did.
It’s actually so sad for them, they have NOTHING, they live off of the crumbs of crumbs. I don’t think her name was even said in canon 😭 at least not more than like two times-
Also I think Euphemia was fond of Sirius because 1. she likely knew how close he was with James for years 2. Sirius lived with the Potters at some point so she and Fleamont had to have gotten a good impression. But like… why do they pretend like she automatically fawned over “her bAbY,” he did come from the Black family so I think it’s safe to assume she and Fleamont were at least somewhat wary of him at first.
(I hate myself for forgetting about your ask 😭 when you sent it to me I immediately started writing my answer then saved it in drafts and didn’t remember until I saw you liking some of my posts 🥲 forgive me pls <3)
#😭#anti marauder stans#anti marauders stans#anti marauderfen#anti marauders stan#harry potter#hp#ask#asks
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“ Did one of you discover anything at all about the Backwater? ” – Morgana to Aeron and Yasmeen
Aeron arrived last at the little meeting, and he could already tell his fun night out was compromised. Morgana was obviously seething. Such a shame, he was already pre-drunk for the party he organized.
They were not alone in the room. Euphemia was on the side, with an annoyed look that didn't leave her since Aeron and Calypso's wedding. Rhys put an arm over her shoulder and she made no effort to hide her disgusted face - he's been courting her ever since her engagement to Aeron was called off. Aldris was stoic next to them, looking every bit the sociopathic serial killer he was. Xanthe paid them no mind, scrabbling something on a page like the whole room was empty.
It was only when Aeron noticed Syrus that he lightened up a bit. His uncle was practically laid out on a chair, smirking at him, like they shared a private joke. Like he found Morgana's temper as laugh-worthy as him. Aeron repressed a smile. Despite his uncle laid out posture, he radiated power all the same. And so did the high queen. So the golden son straightened up and looked at her.
But she wasn't looking at him. Her ire gaze was directed at Yasmeen. Aeron suddenly realized how she was the only human there. He had a tendency to forget it. That girl had never looked fragile or weak to him, like all humans were. But here, in this room, he suddenly remembered her mortality. And if she did too, she didn't show it one bit.
❝I know about princess Calypso's interests.❞ Yasmeen spoke, voice clear. ❝Her hobbies, her favorite food, items. Nothing of interest to you, my queen.❞
Morgana relaxed a second at this mention of respect, and Aeron couldn't help but find this childish. ❝No, indeed. I was beginning to think that wasting your abilities on Calypso was a mistake on my part. But I heard that a few nights ago, the prince Malachai asked you to come to his chamber.❞
❝He did, your Majesty.❞
Euphemia chimed in. ❝And? What happened?❞
Aeron almost rolled his eyes at his cousin's ignorance. Yasmeen didn't react. She knew that answering Euphemia's questions while Morgana was directly talking to her would be considered disrespectful. Besides, it was a stupid question.
❝I assume that if you learned anything valuable, you would have reported to me immediately?❞ Morgana threatened, more than asked.
❝Yes, your Majesty.❞
❝Good. Because it doesn't align with me how my most skilled spy have found no valuable information about the enemy after two months in their constant presence.❞ Morgana grabbed Yasmeen's chin threateningly. ❝One might wonder where said-spy's loyalty lies.❞
This is when Aeron decided to speak. He didn't know why. ❝I've spent months trying to gather informations out of Calypso. I don't think she has extensive knowledge of her father's moves.❞
Morgana finally diverted her attention away from Yasmeen, back to her favorite son. But Syrus spoke first. ❝But his first son and general of his army will. Our lovely changeling here caught his attention. Now she simply has to keep seducing him and all the informations will be ours.❞
A part of Aeron wanted to argue that Yasmeen had shown she had other means to get information rather than sex. Another part wanted to argue that he believed Malachai to be less stupid than that. But instead he just said: ❝Let's all clarify why I was forced to get married to the daughter of Triton if we're still talking about a war, shall we?❞
❝I told you,❞ Xanthe answered, and Aeron was surprised to see that he actually listened. ❝We're just buying time.❞
❝And you could help if you spent a little more time with your wife gaining her trust instead of... whatever the hell it is you're doing.❞ This time Aldris spoke - the one person in this room Aeron disliked more than Rhysand.
❝My wife is happier away from me, and it works both ways.❞
Morgana came closer to him - Yasmeen forgotten, the girl was as silent as the dead. Morgana cupped his face in a more gentle way. ❝But ruling a kingdom isn't about being happy, my son. It's about doing what you have to do.❞
Rhys immediately stood up. ❝He doesn't understand this, mother. But I do.❞
Aeron rolled his eyes shamelessly. What a sucker his brother was.
❝So if I recap, Yasmeen and I are expected to slut our ways into getting informations for your awaited war. Is that what I'm supposed to get from this little meeting?❞
Syrus chuckled at his impertinence. Aeron knew that no one else in this room would have gotten away with that kind of answer. He had privileges on that part. ❝That's pretty much it, yes.❞ His uncle said almost fondly.
❝Then Xanthe should join us too. After all, he had Nathaniel in his bed like what... six ? seven times?❞ Xanthe looked at him with an unreadable expression. But Morgana cut before he could reply.
❝Xanthe will do his part to help the family and so will you. I hope I am making myself clear. Now, Yasmeen, escort my son back to his chambers. His wife awaits him.❞
Aeron didn't say a thing as he followed Yasmeen. It's not like he had any real agency here, and neither did she.
❝You must truly hate us all.❞
❝I love my queen, and I am loyal to her.❞ She answered with a placid voice that made him smirk.
❝Lies are so fascinating. You have always been a great liar. Maybe this is why you told the best stories.❞
❝I didn't know you liked to dwell on memories.❞
❝I don't. But I'm rather drunk, even if it doesn't show-❞
❝It does.❞
❝Ouch. Okay.❞
They walked in silence for a while until Aeron grabbed her wrist to stop them. She immediately grabbed one of her knives.
❝I know Calypso is nice to you. But no one is worth losing your head over. She'd betray you in an instant if her father asked it of her.❞
❝You don't know her.❞
❝It doesn't matter. Everyone is like that, no matter how nice. Sooner or later, they'll turn on you. You should know that.❞
❝I do.❞ She answered coldly while retracting her hand. ❝There's nothing to betray. I didn't lie. Now, if you'll excuse me, we reached our destination and I have other places to be.❞
Aeron frowned when he realized they were not in front of his marital chambers, but his old ones, that he still used. ❝I think my mother intended for you to escort me to Calypso.��
❝Then she should've been clearer. I'm only human after all. Besides, the princess deserves better than your drunk company.❞
He laughed while her gaze remained icy. ❝You like her too much. It'll get you killed.❞
❝Your Highness is ever so kind to worry about me.❞ The sarcasm was now clear in her voice. She opened the door. ❝After you.❞
Aeron sighed and entered the room. He opened his mouth to say something but she had already closed the door. He knew that if he were to open it, Yasmeen would already be long gone. So instead he just fell on his bed, trying to find every possible ways to get out of the castle and back on his ship as soon as possible, until the moment sleep claimed him.
#idk what this is but i was inspired by the ask and wanted to write it#I didn't know how to end it#but I really wanted to write about the insides of the faes dynamic#the 'Le Fey' family and Yasmeen's role in all that#they're truly game of thrones material in my head#aeron le fey#yasmeen#aeron writing prompt#yasmeen writing prompt#writing prompt#likeafairytale
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Summer 1895: Glenn gets dropped with a bomb from his father and he has to deal with it.
Warnings: Scott is a terrible dad, arranged marriages.
Glenn stared at his parents in abhorrent horror. They had sat him down in private to get away from the earshot of his little sister, Winona, who, as recently, was acting strangely. Some days, she was skittish and looked like she wanted to say something to him however disappeared all day.
"I am to be engaged?"
"Well, nothing is official yet but we wanted to tell you since..." His father trailed. He seemed more fidgety than usual. Glenn found it all far too suspicious. Was his sister in on this? No, he waved the thought away because had she known, Winona would not have been able to keep her mouth shut.
"The girl, Euphemia and her family will be joining us for dinner today." His mother looked more saddened than joyful at the news. "Though, they have sent an owl writing that they intend to arrive an hour early to allow Glenn and Euphemia to make themselves more acquainted."
"Is that so, Evelyn?"
"Yes, dear."
"Can I be excused? I need some time to myself."
His father wanted to refute, but his mother stopped Scott. She gave a soft nod of confirmation and let Glenn leave the sitting room. Typically he would have fled to the library and found comfort in the words of Aristotle and Doyle. However, he followed Winona's example and listened to his parent's conversations.
"I can't believe you have done this, Scott!" He heard his mother cry. "He's just a boy of fifteen. I thought we agreed that our children were given the freedom to choose their spouses as long as we find them suitable."
"I know, Evelyn, but have you seen the boy." Scott sighed; he could imagine his father shaking his head. "He has shown absolutely no interest in women."
"Maybe he has other preferences? Or maybe he doesn't want to show?" She suggested.
"I tried and there was still nothing. It's abnormal for a young boy his age to show no signs of worldly desires."
"So you just went and got him a fiancée!" Glenn was comforted that his mother seemed just as bewildered as him.
"Mr Macnair made an offer I couldn't refute. His manufacturing business is expanding at great speeds, and think of the dowry we would receive." His father sounded so excited and eager, like this was a mere business transaction between two families, the business of marriage. Glenn couldn't bear it any longer and left as he knew what would happen next. His mother would scold his father and cry later in private.
Glenn left for the library until the servants told him to prepare himself and prepare for the arrival of the Macnair family. He did a little digging of what he could. The Macnair's are a well-to-do pureblood family despite some having chosen a more humbling life in the highlands of Scotland. A servant boy called Glenn to the entrance.
Their butler guided the eight members of the Macnair family to the Rosewoods. He noticed Euphemia instantly. She wore a white dress that made her already pale skin like snow, and her brown hair was framed her hair in such a way that made her look younger. Despite the girl trying to smile, she looked more grimaced than anything else.
"Glad to make your acquaintance, Mr and Mrs Macnair." His mother plastered her best fake smile. Meanwhile, Winona didn't seem to be interested or engaged with them and took off to read. The two men took off, probably to have pre-dinner drinks and a smoke. At the same time, his mother, Mrs Macnair, and the Macnair boys toured Stromview manor, Glenn and Euphemia tailing behind.
"I'm Glenn Rosewood. A pleasure to make your acquaintance," he offered to shake her hand. Glenn knew the proper etiquette was to kiss her hand, but the thought made him repulsive.
"I'm Euphemia Macnair. The pleasure is all mine." She spoke with softness, but her words were all carefully pronounced.
Both remained in painful silence for several minutes before they were in the library, out of earshot. It seemed to cheer the girl up.
"I would rather that we cut to the chase as I don't want you having false hope..."
"You detest this arrangement as much as I do." Euphemia said, almost like she could read his mind.
"I see that we are both in agreement on that." Glenn felt some hope of getting out of this engagement. They both didn't want this and could say the arrangements didn't work.
"Oh, you possess Doyle," Her blue eyes brightened as she scanned the books. "Do you enjoy his work?"
"Yes, I've all his novels including his latest work, The adventures of Sherlock Holmes. I have always preferred A Study on Scarlet, his original work." He was a little intrigued and surprised by her knowledge of Doyle. "I didn't expect you have his books."
"I have five older brothers, so I just read their books when I'm bored with mine. I've always preferred The Signs of the Four by Doyle, and Sherlock had more soul there." Euphemia explained. Though what he said next surprised him.
"What if we kept this arrangement. Only temporarily," he added quietly before Euphemia could retort without hearing him out. "Think about it. Our families won't bother us with other suitors and leave us at peace for a while, and you'll be the one to break the engagement."
"Why me?" She asked; her blue eyes pierced him.
"A man's reputation can be repaired faster than a woman's if she were the one to break it off. It's an unfortunate truth of our society." Glenn offered.
"Oh gosh, are you sure you want to do this?" She asked, worried. Glenn found it slightly amusing that she was more concerned for him than herself.
"I'm sure I'll be fine but you should be more concerned about yourself."
"I guess. If you're fine with this, then I'll accept this engagement for the time being."
Neither of them wanted this, but at the same time, it could prove helpful for the time being. Though Glenn realises that he doesn't mind Euphemia's company much. It's going to be alright; it's only to save face for a few years.
Previous story: The Perfect Daughter
#lily’s writing#a heritage of stories#hogwarts legacy#glenn rosewood#winona rosewood#scott rosewood#evelyn rosewood#euphemia macnair
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Hope 2 | R.L
Paring: Remus Lupin X Wife!Potter!Reader
Summary: Life is unfair in numerous ways but it seems like it’s out to get the Potters in every way shape and form.
The huge eight-foot man who introduced himself as Hagrid was bringing Harry around London. It was amusing to see Hagrid turn his cousin - Dudley - butt into a pigtail after trying to eat his birthday cake. It was the first birthday Y/n, and Remus hadn’t shown up. Harry didn’t blame them. Of course, to be fair, they didn’t know where Harry was.
“Um, excuse me, Hagrid?”
“Yes, ‘Arry?”
“Where- Where are we going?” Harry questioned hesitantly, and Hagrids lips curled into a smile, “‘Er gon’ meet with som’ of yer folks.” Hagrid answered.
Harry wanted to jump with joy, “Moony and Y/n?”
Hagrid nodded, and Harry smiled brightly. It took a couple of minutes and walking of a couple more blocks. But eventually, they were coming up on an old-looking building made of black stone bricks. In front of the door was a familiar sandy-haired male with green eyes. He was accompanied by his wife with h/c hair and gleaming e/c eyes.
“Y/n! Remus!”
Y/n turned to see her little nephew running up to hug her tightly, “Hey Harry.”
Remus ruffled his hair while Harry hugged his aunt, “Hey there, mini Prongs.”
“I missed you.”
“Awe, I missed you too, Harry.” Y/n replied, pulling apart from Harry, “I’m sorry we didn’t show up right away. But we’re here now. I hope that’s okay. We wouldn’t miss your birthday for the world, okay?”
He nodded, “I know. I can always count on you.”
“Good.” Remus stated, “Now c’mon mini prongs. Gotta get your school supplies.”
Walking into the Leaky Cauldron with Hagrid, they were greeted by multiple people. Many people were flabbergasted by meeting the famous Harry Potter and were welcoming to see Y/n Potter. In the back of the Leaky Cauldron, Hagrid tapped his wand against the brick wall, causing it to open into Diagon Alley. Harry’s mouth was agape at this new form of Magic.
It was astonishing. The narrow alleyway was packed with people. Clusters of them walking in groups. Some were carrying animals, or brown-wrapped items Harry could suppose were books. Y/n smiled and intertwined her hand with Remus’. She could remember the first time she stepped into Diagon Alley. James was acting like such a prat.
“Woah!” James gasped, “Look at all the cool stuff!”
Fleamont chuckled, “Yeah. Isn’t it cool, sweetheart?”
Y/n nodded, completely entranced in the stonework in the alleyway. It was littered with different shops, and the roads were an uneven stone. Euphemia and Fleamont shared a look of pure glee. Their children were magical born, and they were finally experiencing it first hand. Of course, they had their incidents where Y/n would make lights flicker or James blowing plates.
As they began walking, James began to run off, bumping into people left and right, “James! Get back here!” Fleamont scolded, but he was out of sight.
Euphemia sighed, “He’s gonna be a handful.”
“Definitely.” Fleamont agreed, running a hand through his dark brunet hair, “Perhaps he’ll be even worse than me.”
His wife glared at him. Despite James disappearing, they took Y/n into Flourish and Blotts to get their books. They needed books such as The Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1), A History of Magic, Magical Theory, A Beginners’ Guide to Transfiguration, One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi, Magical Drafts and Potions, Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, and finally, The Dark Forces: A Guide to Self-Protection.
They didn’t find James until they reached Quality Quidditch Supplies. He was already eyeing the new broom on display. His mouth seemed to be salivating at it. Y/n rolled her eyes at James, drooling over a piece of wood. Euphemia chuckled and motioned Fleamont to reel him back in. It seemed that Euphemia would never get a break, and her heart would be in a constant attack of worry. They had a mischief Quidditch player on their hands.
“C’mon Harry,” Y/n beckoned, “Lots of stuff to get.”
His smile faltered just a tad, “But I don’t- I don’t have any money.”
Harry’s embarrassment made the tips of his ears red, “That ain’t true. ‘Course ye got money.” Hagrid replied bluntly, making Y/n nudge him harshly, “Hagrid!”
“What?” Hagrid queried, confused, “‘S not like ‘m lyin’.”
“Yes, but you don’t just say that.” Y/n scolded, laughing lightly.
“Oops?”
Harry looked up at his flustered aunt, “Come on, Harry. We’re going to Gringotts.”
They began walking to the bank of wizardry. The goblin at the front allowed them to the vault, where Harry was able to pocket a couple of handfuls of galleons, sickles, and knuts. Hagrid made a separate trip for Dumbledore as the other three waited patiently. When they exited Gringotts, Harry began to buy all his supplies.
Their first stop was getting him a wand at Ollivander’s. Harry pushed the door open, and it sounded a bell off, but no one appeared the be in the shop. Remus and Y/n stood behind him as he let out a hesitant, “Hello.”
It took a minute, but then an older male appeared with hair as white as snow and wispy as whiskers. Ollivander smiled brightly at the familiar people in his shop and at the little boy who resembled the older female greatly.
“Ah, Y/n Potter.” Ollivander said, “James broken his wand again?”
Y/n released a shaky breath, “No, not this time.”
“We’re here actually for Harry here.” Remus motioned to Harry, “He’s getting his first wand. He starts at Hogwarts this year.”
Ollivander's lips quirked, “He yours?”
“No, sir.” Y/n shook her head, “He’s James and Lily’s son.”
“Where are they? I’d love to see them, you know.”
Remus shifted awkwardly, “You haven’t heard?”
Ollivander shook his head, “My parents are dead.” Harry informed, “Someone killed them.”
Everything clicked into place in Ollivanders mind. How stupid could old age make him? He had just sounded terribly insensitive, “‘M so sorry. Pardon me and my old age. I didn’t mean-“
“It’s perfectly fine, Ollivander.” Y/n smiled reassuringly.
The older man smiled and began giving Harry wands. The first one was horrid. It made wands on the shelf fall onto the ground, making a vast clatter noise. The boy smiled sheepishly and placed it back in the box. The next wand caused a shatter of a vase which Harry cringed at. It took a couple of minutes until Ollivander came out with the following wand. It was 11 inches long, made of holly, and possessed a phoenix feather core.
Harry waved the wand, and nothing disastrous happened. Remus and Y/n smiled with joy. Ollivander charged him seven galleons for it, and Harry placed down the golden coins with glee. Ollivander could remember the way James had done the same while Y/n beside him. Their identical toothy grins as Fleamont paid the man.
“My wands cooler than yours!”
“No way!”
James nodded in triumph, “You’re just lame.”
“And you’re boring!”
“No way!” James gasped, “I am far from boring!”
Y/n crossed her arms, “And I’m not lame.”
Euphemia chuckled, redirecting her children to look at the counter while the two parents stood behind them, “Ignore them. They like to try and be better than the other.”
Ollivander grinned, “Ah, siblings. What amazing pairs they make.”
Fleamont scoffed, “Yeah, try having two at the same time. Felt like the crucio curse.”
“What do you say?” Euphemia beckoned, and both twins turned to Ollivander, smiling gleefully, “Thank you!”
“They’ll be a handful.” Ollivander informed Euphemia and Fleamont, “But they’ll change the world, and they’ll do it together.”
The older man smiled at Remus and Y/n as Harry went outside to see Hagrid carrying a giant golden cage with a beautiful snowy owl inside, “That boy is something else.”
Remus chuckled, “We know. Little mischief-maker, just like James.”
“Perhaps he is,” Ollivander replied, “But he’ll change the world.”
The rest of the day went by blissfully. After getting all his school supplies, they retreated into the Leaky Cauldron to eat dinner. The tavern was practically empty as they sat at a long narrow table. Hagrid at the head, Harry to his left, Remus across, and Y/n beside Remus on the other side. They were eating in silence before Harry spoke up.
“What happened to my parents?” Harry questioned, and before anyone could answer, he continued, “Truthfully. No lies.”
Hagrid and Remus turned to the female at the table who swallowed thickly, “Something horrid, Harry.”
“How horrid?”
“Harry-“ Remus began.
“A death I wouldn’t wish upon anyone, even my worse enemy.” Y/n answered, staring at the soup in front of her, “The way they died doesn’t matter.”
Harry crossed his arms, “I believe it does.”
“In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t.” Y/n replied, taking deep breaths in and out, trying to stay calm, “It doesn’t matter how they died. They’re dead, and they aren’t coming back.”
Tears collected in her eyes when she muttered, “No matter how badly I want them to.”
Hastily Y/n wiped her face and placed her napkin on the table. She sniffled before standing and pushing her chair in. Y/n leaned down to kiss Harry on the forehead before retreating to the room they got upstairs. Harry sighed and stared at his bowl of soup that remained steaming hot. Remus rubbed his face with his palms.
“Harry,” Remus called, and Harry’s green eyes met similar ones, “Your parents died at the hands of a very evil Wizard. He went as dark as one could go.”
Harry looked intrigued, and Remus continued despite his throat beginning to constrict, “His name was Voldemort, but most people call him ‘You-Know-Who.”
Hagrid flinched at the actual name being said, “James risked everything to try and save you and your mother. When he died, Lily tried to save you. In the end, it all worked out because you were saved. You didn’t die like you were supposed to.”
“Why did aunt Y/n leave the table?”
“Talking about this is still hard for her.” Remus replied, and Harry could see the tears in his eyes too, “It’s hard for me too, but- but you need to know.”
“What were they to you?”
“James and Lily were everything to me, Harry. Everything and so much more. Your mother saw the good in people when they didn’t see it themselves. Your father? Well-“ He chuckled, “He was a trip and a prat. But he cared for those around him. Treated me like family and took care of me like a brother.”
Harry fiddled with the sleeve of his sweater, “James was a mischief-maker that one.” Hagrid said, “Always up to no good.”
“Him and that Sirius boy.” Hagrid chuckled, “Dynamic duo those two.”
Remus let out a tearful chuckle, “Yeah, that was Padfoot and Prongs.”
“Always up to no good.” Remus whispered.
The following day Remus had waken up to what he swore was the most perfect sight. Y/n was still sleeping beside him. Her head was nestled under his chin, drinking in his body heat. Her hair was laid against the fluffy white pillow. Their legs were intertwined together. Gently Remus kissed her forehead before seeing the clock read about nine o’clock.
Remus took five more minutes to admire her before waking her up. He began to kiss all over her face, and Y/n scrunched her nose, waking up as his lips kept attaching to a new place on her face. He smiled as she opened her eyes to meet his green ones.
“Mornin’ love.”
His Welsh accent was to die for, “Morning, Rem.”
“You ready to take Harry to Platform Nine and Three Quarters?”
Y/n shook her head, “No. Not really.”
“Hey,” Remus said softly, stroking her hair, “You’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.”
“There are so many memories there, Rem.” Y/n replied, “Like- Like meeting Sirius for the first time.”
“Or seeing you come back after fourth year with an entirely new style.” Remus chuckled, “Or- Or seeing James almost fall out of the train.
Remus caressed her cheek with his thumb, “We’ll make it through, love. Harry needs us today.”
“Yeah.” She replied breathily, “He does.”
They both ventured out of bed into the cool air of London. Remus, Y/n, and Hagrid walked Harry to Kings Cross. When they arrived, Hagrid had departed from them to do something for Dumbledore. Harry was bluntly confused when his ticket read Platform Nine and Three Quarters. Last he checked, that wasn’t a platform.
As they reached the main floor of the train station, Remus and Y/n recognized the Weasleys almost instantly. Molly had embraced them tightly as they all went through the platform. Harry gave his trunks to the man at the end of the train and turned to the only family he had left. His eyes glistened with tears, and he tried to hold them back but failed.
“Harry,” Y/n knelt to his level, “You’re gonna be okay. I promise. James and I made lots of friends at Hogwarts.”
He smiled at the mention of his father, “Do you think… Do you think he’d be proud of me?”
“They’d be beyond proud, Harry.” Remus replied, smiling, “You’re everything they wanted you to be.”
Harry turned back to Y/n and hugged her tightly, “Please make sure you write to us.”
“‘Course, Auntie.” Harry replied as they pulled apart, “Love you guys.”
Y/n stood beside Remus, “We love you too, sweetheart.”
Harry smiled and wiped his cheeks before hopping on the train. He found a compartment alone and watched out the window as the train began moving. Y/n and Remus watched as the train hauled by. Kids who started waving their last goodbyes to their parents.
“Mum, dad!” James exclaimed from inside the compartment, “We love you!”
Euphemia and Fleamont chuckled tearfully, “We love you guys too!”
Truthfully James never wanted to leave his parents. They were his entire world. When Kings Cross was no longer in sight, he plopped down in the seat beside Y/n, who put her head on his shoulder. His left arm wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her tightly to his side.
“We got this, sis.” James assured, “We always have each other.”
It didn’t take long for Harry to get in trouble. As a matter of fact, it made Y/n laugh that within the first month, he had already managed a detention. She had settled for a letter rather than a Howler. Remus had made sure to tell him his fair of scolding words (“Say hi to Minnie for me!”). Harry smiled when the letter arrived in the morning.
Harry definitely made sure to say hi to “Minnie,” which made McGonagall smile like an idiot despite her usual strict nature. She could see and hear James saying the name when she gave them detention or Sirius’ pouty face begging her to have some form of mercy on them, for they had just turned the Slytherin robes red. Ever the dramatics that Black.
When he arrived back at the Platform, he nuzzled into Y/n and Remus’ arms before departing to the Dursleys. But all was good because in just a month he’d see them again for his birthday, which he did. They took him to Diagon Alley to get his second-year stuff along with some ice cream to celebrate his twelfth birthday.
He spent a week of his summer with them in their little house in London. It was far better than Privet Drive, and he felt a lot safer. But after the week was up, he was forced to return to the Dursleys. Within a week of being back, he’d managed to screw everything up. A thing named Dobby had quite literally dumped puddling all over one of the Dursley’s guests, and that got him trapped in his room.
Thankfully, Ronald Weasley, who had become his close friend, had saved him. Harry went to the Burrow for the first time and met everyone else. Molly had notified Remus and Y/n of his entrance. Sadly, they couldn’t make it to the Platform for reasons. Molly wouldn’t tell Harry, but he was okay with it.
Until Ron and he smashed into the brick wall, making them late for the train. It was then Ron had a brilliant thought of taking the flying car to Hogwarts. It did work until they got stuck in the Whomping Willow and then got caught by Severus Snape. A letter was sent home to Y/n and Molly. Both of which made two very different Howlers to their children.
Molly’s howler was scolding them, and it made Ron’s ears turn pink. Y/n and Remus’ howler was a different story. The moment it opened, laughter rang through the Great Hall. Familiar laughter of Remus and Y/n. It made McGonagall furious and happy at the same time.
“Merlin Harry!” Remus’ voice rang out, “You’re brilliant, aren’t you!”
“Remus, we’re supposed to be scolding him!” Y/n retorted jokingly, “I’m scolding myself for never thinking of it!” Remus replied.
Y/n chuckled, “Obviously, you shouldn't have done that, Harry; however, as long as you’re not harmed, we aren’t mad. Just be more careful next time.”
Remus was still dying of laughter, “Remus is still dying of laughter. We love you, Harry. Stay safe.”
Ron looked appalled with the coolness of the howler, “Bloody hell, you have a cool family.”
“They’re pretty cool.” Harry shrugged, smiling.
Y/n and Remus would be lying if the whole petrifying thing didn’t scare them. They were worried for Harry’s safety but weren’t surprised when Harry ended up saving them all like last year. When they were on the Platform, Remus began getting on the train with him after kissing Y/n goodbye.
He was grunting and groaning at every movement. The bags beneath his eyes looked more prominent than usual. Remus moved sluggishly, which was very unlike him. But Harry didn’t question it until he began to get on the train at Harry’s side.
“Uncle Moony?”
“Yes, Harry?” Remus replied after sitting in a compartment, his cloak covering most of his body.
“Why’re you on the train?”
He chuckled, “I’m your new Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor.”
Harry smiled, and Remus fell into a dreamless sleep after a rough full moon the night prior. Hermione and Ron joined them not too long after as Harry began telling them about Sirius Black. The year went by as eventful as usual. Harry found out the accurate way his parents died along with Remus and Y/n. Peter Pettigrew being the culprit and then leaving before someone could catch him.
Afterward, Sirius had been staying in the guest bedroom at Y/n and Remus’. He didn’t want to go back to Grimmauld Place. That was the last place he wanted to go. So despite not wanting to be a burden, he took the position that Y/n offered him. Ever so kind, just like James. When he walked through those doors, Y/n had hugged him tightly and kissed his cheek.
“It’s good to have you back, older brother.”
Sirius could’ve cried on the spot, “It’s nice to see you again, little sis.”
The next couple of years were a trip. Fourth-year Harry had managed to get his name pulled out of the Goblet of Fire, leading to a new adventure of challenges. After finishing his fourth year, Cedric Diggory had died, marking the return of Voldemort, which had traumatized Harry in more than one way. That summer, he decided to stay with Y/n, Remus, and Sirius. They were all fantastic help throughout the entire thing. Through his nightmares, Y/n would make him hot chocolate and sit on the couch with him as he talked.
Fifth-year was dreadful. Delores Umbridge had come into the office as the new Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor, and the Order of the Phoenix reformed. Her detentions were terrible and horrid, especially for the first years. They were just kids, for Merlin’s sake. It made Y/n fume when she saw the back of Harry’s hand. The night they ventured to the Department of Mysteries was almost the worst night Harry could have dreamed of.
Sirius had almost died if Y/n wasn’t as quick as she was. Bellatrix was stunned to see her spell deflected but kept firing nonetheless. When they got home, it was silent. Remus had made tea for himself and Sirius while making hot chocolate for the other two. Harry had laid his head on Y/n’s shoulder and fallen asleep.
Truth be told, sixth year wasn’t any better. Dumbledore had died, and Harry was left to find the rest of the Horcruxes. It was then Sirius learned the actual death of his brother, making him mourn him all over again. Seventh year Harry, Ron, and Hermione ventured out to find the rest of them.
When Harry returned to Hogwarts through the passageway to the Room of Requirement with Snape as headmaster, the war had officially started. In the end, everything had fallen into place. When Harry used the resurrection stone, he saw them. He saw James, Lily, Remus, and Sirius. Harry almost wanted to laugh at seeing them all together. They looked so happy.
“Where- Where’s Y/n?”
Remus gave a solemn smile, “She made it. She’s still out there. Waiting for you.”
“Does that mean…”
“Turns out my sister is a tougher cookie than I thought.” James stated, and Harry turned to him, “She misses you.”
James chuckled, “As I do her.”
Harry turned back to Remus, “Does she know?”
“She was there when it happened.” Remus replied, “I had to give her one last ‘I love you’ and kiss goodbye, right?”
A noise rumbled from a distance, “It’s time, sweetie.” Lily stated.
Harry released a shaky breath before dropping the stone on the ground. He had to do this for Y/n, for Ron, for Hermione, for everyone. He was ready. When he stepped in front of Voldemort to die, all he could think about was his Aunt's eyes. The way they glittered with tears when she let him go for the first time. The way they creased when she smiled at his first Christmas. The way they gleamed with mischief when she gave the Weasley twins new prank material.
His last words would be ones he’d never regret, “Thank you, aunt Y/n, for everything.”
Because through everything, she was the only constant. She was the only one to hold him through anything. Through every nightmare, every battle, every tear, every smile. She was there with her radiant smile and caring nature.
When Harry defeated Voldemort, the world stopped. It was done. It was over. But the pain wasn’t gone. The trauma wasn’t bypassed. This was more than a war. Harry walked into the Great Hall to see crying parents, kids, and siblings mourning their dead loved ones. His eyes zoomed on Y/n sitting crisscross beside her husband, holding his hand tightly.
Wordlessly Harry sat beside her and leaned his head against her shoulder. Y/n tilted her head onto his. No tears fell from her eyes despite everything she had gone through, two wars, friends dead, parents dead, brother dead, and now husband dead.
“His last words were- they were,” She choked, and Harry rubbed her shoulder, “I love you more than Moony loves the moon.”
Harry smiled, “Dad said you were a tough cookie.”
Y/n chuckled, and Harry relished in the sound, “He said that if anyone could get through this, it’s you.”
“Damn it, James.” She said to no one, still holding Remus’ hand.
“We’ll get through this.” Harry said, “And we’ll do it together.”
“Together.”
#remus x you#remus x y/n#remus x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#james potter#james Potter x you#james potter x reader#James Potter x y/n#potter reader#Harry Potter#harry potter fanfiction#harry potter imagine#sirius black#sirius black imagine#sirius black x reader#Sirius Black x you#Sirius Black x y/n#marauders fluff#marauders imagine#marauders#marauders x reader
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His home, reindeers and an pretty angel💌
Pairing: Remus Lupin x fem!Potter!reader
Pure fluff
Summary: Remus and (y/n) spend christmas together.
Warnings: one mentions of murderbut I think that’s it.
A/N: Merry christmas my loves <3
“Remmy, Remmy, Remmy wake up it’s christmas!” Remus barely recognised the smell of hot chocolate before his eyes fluttered open and landed on the most sweetest sight he’s ever seen. There she was, (y/n) Potter, his girlfriend, in a warm christmas jumper with Rudolph the reindeer on it and fluffy Santa socks.
She was straddling his lap and was looking at him like a puppy when its owner came back after a long time. “Mornin’ love.” His voice was still thick of sleep and rasp. The curtains were closed but he could still see that it was snowing last night while they were sleeping.
A snowy christmas. It was truly magical.
Remus sat up with you still on his lap. “Merry christmas, angel.” He said softly while rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Merry christmas Remmy!” She was excited, he could tell that. He took her further in his arms, her face in his neck, just laying there and appreciating their love.
“I have hot chocolate with marshmallows for you, it’s on your bed table in the christmas mug.“ she murmured softly. His eyes shot open at that. He truly loved chocolate. Slowly he pulled her a bit away from him so he could get the mug. He loved the chocolate she made, it always tastet and smelled like home. She was his home.
Maybe it was the Potter charm. That everyone felt welcome, doesn’t matter who or when or where. The Potter’s were family to many. They took Sirius in when he left home after he got disowned, they took care of Peter whenever he came over and felt alone and despite Remus’ condition, they took care of him too. Whether Euphemia and Fleamont, (y/n)’s and James’ parents, let it shown,after a rough fullmoon Effy always made sure that Remus’ bed was softer than usual while Fleamont made sure the house was quite. Not to mention that, even though Remus pretended that he didn’t know it, Mia and (y/n) always patched him up when he was falling asleep.
Christmas wasn’t any different. Every Potter loved christmas. When Remus was still in Hogwarts, his dorm that he shared with Sirius, James, Peter and Frank was always decorated. Little lights everywhere and snow globes. In his shared flat with (y/n) it was the same, just more. In the living room was a big christmas tree with many lights and an pretty angel on top. Remus said it was one, unnecessary because they would be spending christmas eve with the Potter parents and all of their friends at (y/n)’s and James’ house where they grew up and two, the angel was lame against you. Cheeky git. Nonetheless christmas decorations were everywhere and on every advent-day you baked cookies. That Remus loved, they were chocolate cookies.
Remus took his hot chocolate with him and you both got out of bed and into the living room to eat breakfast. Together you decided what christmas movie you would be watching. You decided the Grinch would be perfect as Remus sometimes resembled him perfect. Remus disagreed. Nonetheless you both watched the movie and after that got ready to go to your parents. Christmas songs in the background and smiles on both your faces. You wore a beautiful red dress with tiny white snowflakes, perfect for the winter time, while Remus wore black pants and a knitted sweatshirt.
You looked at him with a mischievous look. He knew that face, James had the same look whenever he had a prank idea back in his school days. You took his hand and guided him to the bedroom you two shared. “What is it, love?” He was somewhat feared for what’s to come. Not because he thought you were dangerous or trying to kill him but because he knew you have a plan. And that you had. “Close your eyes.” You had a giddy smile on your face. One he couldn’t disobey. So he closed your eyes and you put a christmas sweater in his hands. A sweater that had Santa Claus and his reindeers on it. He opened his eyes.
“What is this, (y/n/n)?” You just pulled it closer to him. “Wear it, Remmy!” He couldn’t say no to you. So he put it on and as soon as he set his eyes on what’s on the sweathshirt he laughed. “What is with you and reindeers this year, my love?” He asked, still chuckling. “Just look how cute they are!” He shook his head amused at how christmas could make you beam with happiness.
When the two arrived at your parents’ house and James opened the door he welcomed you in with an giddy smile. “Merry christmas you two!” You took off your coats and hung them up. “Merry christmas James.” You hugged. And in that moment, when you saw your whole friends and family together in the living room, you just knew that everything’s going to be okay.
#hogwarts#harry potter#james potter x sister!reader#christmas#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin x you#potter family#remus lupin x y/n#remus john lupin#fanfiction
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Euphemia Potter — Micro Fic
Euphemia Potter is a power house. She always has been and she probably will be till the day she dies… maybe even after.
Fleamont Potter is so inlove with his wife. He would give the world for her happiness. He was so lucky when she changed her name from Singh to Potter. She loved him fiercely, and in Fleamont’s mind… he would always be indebted to her.
Flea and Effie got married 3 times to seal the deal. What is that phrase? Third times the charm? They had a wedding in India, a wedding in Venezuela, and a wedding in the UK. Family and friends from all over the world loved, cared and embraced the couple on their new journey.
Fleamont was changing the world of magical medicine and Euphemia was ruffling feathers with her social activism. They pushed boundaries, created never before thought of solutions, and held their fellow wizards to a higher standard. They added color and light to everywhere they went. They touched lives and people as they reached for something better.
When Euphemia and Fleamont decided it was time to start a family they were caught off guard with the difficulties they encountered. If anyone would be good parents and were worthy to bring in new life it was them. They tried everything for YEARS. They traveled to India and Venezuela again to try local traditions and magic. They sought old magic and new. They got advice and even branched into kitchen magic taught and almost exclusively used by house elves.
The stress was draining for them both, for their hope, for their marriage. Euphemia and Flea would agree and say their marriage and words were not perfect no matter what others thought. But through these experiences they learned the power of words in magic and healing and made a pact to not disparage each other or their home like so many other couples did.
By the end of their 8th year trying to conceive Effie was tired and resigned that she would just be the cool auntie to all her nieces and nephews. She would be an activist and advocate for all the women who could have babies.
Fleamont decided to surprise Euphemia with a trip to Jamaica. They would rest on the beaches in warm sun and drink coconut water and rejuvenate their souls. Needless to say the couple was extatic to get away from adult life and responsibilities for a short time.
One of the days on the beach Fleamont especially spoiled Euphemia. They had embraced in the heat of the morning pressing love and care into each others skin and tan-lines. They had strawberry smoothies and a full breakfast and were now laying out on the coast sunbathing. Euphemia was watching the waves, a hand holding down her straw hat in the breeze and the other on her stomach.
She looked down and traced her belly button. The circle swirling and getting larger over her stomach. Then she drew waving lines branching out like sun rays. Her skin glittered as she said a poem she had read once.
Even
After
All this time
The Sun never says
To the Earth
“You owe me.”
Look what happens
With love like that,
It lights the
Whole
Sky.
As she finished the poem her skin lightened and glittered in the pattern she had drawn. Euphemia’s stomach had changed slightly, minutely but was firmer nonetheless, and the symbol of the sun marked her skin. A sharp inhale fell from her lips as she looked over at Flea cradling her stomach.
And the sun rose.
In the months following, there was much celebration and love and community. Euphemia gave thanks and solar offerings everyday in hopes this baby would carry to term. In hopes that the sun had truly smiled on them.
And it had. At the end of March Euphemia and Flea welcomed a beautiful bouncing baby boy. He was so squishable and delightful. He smiled often and his face was adorned with two dimples. When he blinked his eyes open Euphemia and Flea were surprised to find them golden. They shown with flecks of gold and honey. They were warm and melted like carmel. He was their sunshine baby.
The most shocking feature was his birthmark though. To match Euphemia’s, which they thought to be the remnants of some ancient magic, James had a swirling sun that filled the skin of his stomach. It was a shade or two lighter than the rest of his skin and always a little warmer.
Euphemia was so grateful for the gift she had been given; to have this physical reminder of their miracle and the connection of her and her son.
(Poem credit to Rumi)
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The Message on the Wall
Pairing: James Potter x gn!Reader - Marauders x Reader Content
Word Count: 5.9k (jdklfdh im sorry)
Warnings: Underage Drinking, Implications of... yeah. I think that’s about it.
Requested: Yes, a long time (i feel bad for only getting to it but i hope the nonnie stuck around to see this piece) by an anon who asked for James x Reader with childhood best friends to lovers trope.
Summary: In which, James Potter was busy writing himself a message on the wall but was too blind to read what he had to say.
Pictures.
In actuality they were only images. For Muggles, they stood stagnant, for James Potter they moved slightly.
But in deeper meaning pictures were moments in time captured in a frame. They were a personal reminder of things that were, things that used to be and anything else that didn’t fall into one of the other two categories.
James Potter adored pictures. His room was littered with them. A handful were of Quidditch players and Tutshill Tornados merchandise. One picture of him and his parents sat on the nightstand beside his bed. But adjourned on the wall to the left was a mostly blank wall. One small Tornados banner was pinned against the soft red paint and in the middle a picture he was particularly fond of.
The film captured James at the age of four. A broom was clutched in his left hand and a toothy smile on his face as the wind rustled his hair causing it to stick up more than it already did. Beside him was you, your eyes crossed and your tongue licking a swirled lolly.
When his mother had shown him the picture you had just left for home, making a young James quite sad that his friend couldn’t stay just a little longer. Euphemia Potter had smiled, handing the picture to her son. “It’s okay, my love. Now you have a piece of Y/N with you.”
“How?” James had asked, his lower lip jutting out in a frown.
Euphemia laughed. “The picture captures you together. Look how happy the two of you look!” she points at her son’s smile in the photo. “You can do whatever you’d like with it.”
James grinned, his eyes lighting up once more. “I want to hang it, mum!” he dragged her hand into the bedroom with him, climbing on top of his bedsheets and pressing the picture to the wall. “Here. That way I can say goodnight to them even when they're not here.”
Euphemia Potter smiled watching as her son tucked himself under the covers. “That’s a brilliant idea, James.” With a wave of her wand, two pins fastened themself to the wall, the photo beneath.
That was the beginning of James’s love for pictures. More pictures would accumulate such as the one of him and his father at a Tornados game. Drawings you would give him of flowers and Kneazles. The pictures would come and go but yours stayed the same. An additional picture of you and James would later be added three years later when the two of you were seven. James’s broom no longer sat in one hand, instead was gripped with two and hovering five feet off the ground. He had a wicked smile on his face, his glasses slightly falling down his nose. You sat behind him, your small fingers clutching to his waist as the picture captured you mid-squeal.
Time went on yet the pictures of the two of you stayed the same. Along with your drawings, which had improved dramatically since you were seven, he’d occasionally find a Hollyhead Harpies banner plastered to his wall. When he came to scold you, pink banners adjourned in his hand, you’d laugh at the pout on his lips. He could never stay angry at you and always joined in on your laughter.
The final year before things would slightly change was the year before going to Hogwarts. A third picture was added at the age of ten. The Potter family had accompanied your family on a trip to Diagon Alley in which you had bought your screech owl, Juniper. James had one arm wrapped around you. His hair was untidy and a goofy smile was on his face as his other hand flicked your forehead. Your eyes were closed mid-laugh as one hand pushed his face away and the other perched with Juniper who screeched happily on your available arm.
Again, time went on quickly and changes were made in James Potter’s room but you were not one of them. He packed up his Hogwarts things the night of August 31st, leaving his room full of pictures with a soft smile.
You rode on the train with him, both of you waving goodbye to your loved ones. You grinned at him wickedly, “Excited?” you ask.
“Definitely.” he responded. “Do you have money for the trolley?”
You slide into a train compartment, one small boy already sitting there. “Yeah. Do you need to borrow some?”
James nodded and you rolled your eyes, handing money over to the kind witch who passed by, grabbing pumpkin pasties for you and Bertie Botts for James.
The ride was life-changing as you made acquaintances with similar mindsets. Two more boys entered your compartment and along with the scrawny boy from before, all of you made it to Gryffindor. “Where dwell the brave at heart” as James liked to put it.
First year was an interesting feat with James quickly falling head over heels for Lily Evans. Your friendship never faltered although the thought of her in his life made you feel odd. However, you were sure she wouldn’t be in his life for quite some time seeing as his persistent efforts were met with an equally stubborn rejection.
“She’s a firecracker, that one.” he sighed, walking beside you down the hall after another devastating encounter with Lily.
“You’re just embarrassing yourself now, my boy.” you reply, dubbing his nickname to ease the comment.
He smirked. “Then why do you hang out with me?”
“Because, I’m the one who makes sure you don’t cross the line from embarrassing to mortifying.”
He shakes his head with a silly grin. “I doubt that. You love me. That’s why.”
You laugh, an effective way of avoiding the curious ideas that ran through your young mind. “Don’t throw around the l- word so quickly! You’ve got to mean it.”
James bumped your side. “But I’ve known you for years.”
You ruffle his hair, making it messier than it already was. “Save it for Evans.”
---
The year ended and the two of you went home to Northern England hands overflowing with Gryffindor red, spirits high with a drive for Quidditch practice and addresses from Remus, Peter, and Sirius tucked away in your pockets.
James’s room changed tremendously that first year. Alongside the Tutshill Tornados merchandise were small Gryffindor banners, lions enchanted to roar at the touch. You had given him one of your sketches from the school year, one of Sirius and him laughing in Transfiguration, another of him and Peter skipping stones. The pictures of the two of you still remained, a small collection of dust coating the edges which he wiped away with a smile.
Second year was merry and full of high spirits. James had acquired his father’s invisibility cloak which gave cause to a number of nighttime rendezvous and adventures in the kitchens. Suspicion arose on Remus, whose monthly disappearances came to your attention. With the help of Sirius and Peter, the group soon discovered Remus’s guarded secret and accepted the furry little problem with open arms.
The Lily Evans situation did not get any better with James’s persistence holding up fiercely and her hatred toward him even more harsh. As Sirius had dubbed it, “Mate, at this point you’re never getting married.” Remus and Peter whole-heartedly agreed, sending James into an adolescent spiral.
“What if I don’t get married, Y/N/N?” he confided in you by the shores of the Black Lake.
You chuckled, his delirium quite adorable. “You’re going to get married, James. Trust me.”
He sighed, snapping a twig between his fingers. “It’s not definite.”
“Nothing is.” you counter.
James groaned. “I know. I know. But I would like it to be. Wouldn’t you?”
You contemplated the idea, a thought coming to your head. “What if it could be?”
He stared at you curiously. Your eyes lit up and James grinned. “Hit me.”
“If by the time we are thirty neither of us are married then we should get married to each other.” you propose, a proud smile on your face. “That way we can have a definite of our own.”
James grinned. “I like that idea. But what if one of us gets married before that?”
You frown. “Then I guess it’d be a flop. But it’s better than nothing, right?”
He agreed quickly. The sun was setting into a pond of pink. The wind rustled and birds chirped and the moment seemed picture perfect and James wished a camera would magically pop up and capture the moment so he’d be able to hang it on his wall for years to come. It did not work that way, instead, he turned to you with a smirk. “I don’t have anything to propose with.”
You looked down in embarrassment and gave him a shove. “We’re not getting married yet! It’s just a deal not the real thing.”
He rolled his eyes at you. “I know but it feels as though something special should happen. How about we seal with a spit swear?”
You stick your tongue out and pretend to gag. “Ew! No.” you flick his forehead causing him to wince. He grins before flicking you back, watching as you fall back onto the grass.
“I guess a flick works as well.” he sighs. “Y/N Potter has a nice ring to it.”
Your head falls against his shoulder. “I can’t believe I might be a Potter one day. Sounds disgusting.”
James laughs, the weight of your head feeling oddly familiar against his shoulder. “Oh, shut it!”
---
The years came and went. Third year, James made the Quidditch team and he quickly became a ladies man despite his obvious pining over Evans. You made sure to keep his feet on the ground as you didn’t want his ego to get larger than it already was. You came to all his games, occasionally bringing a camera so that James could add his moments of glory onto his beloved room wall. There was the time he tried dedicating a shot to you and ended up getting knocked off his broom by a Beater.
He made the next one thankfully.
On the other hand, you had earned the title of master dueler amongst the third years for your quick arm and sharp spellcasting. While James was at Quidditch practice: you, Peter, Remus, and Sirius would practice in empty classrooms although after a while they became rather bored as you would always win. James would cheer you on, even when you beat him there was a compliment of your skill and he was more than anything, proud.
The summer between third and fourth year was the year the Marauders got their first group picture together. Everyone had met up at the Potter residence, Euphemia Potter snapping the photo with Sirius and James to the left, Peter and Remus on the right, and you in the middle. James hung the picture on his wall as it was routine by now. The whole gang got to see his famous wall of pictures, his life an open storybook to anyone who looked closely.
Fourth year sparked love, pranks, and new ideas. Peter went on his first date, flaming at the cheeks as his friends waved him off embarrassingly. Group pranks ensued upon Snape whose oily hair was dyed all colors of the rainbow by the end of the first semester. You had gone on your first date as well, Steven Goldstein from Hufflepuff whom James threatened to beat up and Sirius who gave him “a talk”.
Most importantly, the group addressed Remus’s furry little problem seeing as each year he came back with more and more scars than before. Two ideas sparked up from the meeting and both were large feats that every member of the group was willing to take.
“So wait..” Peter asked. “You want to make a map… that tracks everyone in Hogwarts?”
James nodded and Remus shook his head. “That’s exactly what I’m saying. Don’t look at me that way, Remus.”
Remus shoved him lightly. “How would that even work though? Isn’t it a little invasive?”
You smiled. “It most certainly is invasive but think about how awesome it’d be to have something like that. All we would need is…”
“A complex locator spell.” you and Sirius said together.
Everyone grinned. “Pete can do the drawing and sketching. He’s good at that stuff. We should check for secret passageways. All of us could do the magic. We’ve got the brains.”
“I don’t think someone with brilliant magic technique would use the word brain to describe their intelligence.” you point out. James simply flicked you in the head.
“And there’s the Animagi thing…” Sirius added.
“That’s a reach.” Remus replied.
“More than the map?” Peter questioned.
Remus sighed. “You guys don’t have to do that for me. I’ve been transforming on my own for years. No need to have buddies now.”
“Nonsense.” you say. “Anything for you, Rem. This is what you deserve.”
The friends looked at each other silently. “Are we ready to pull off the biggest student feat in Hogwarts history?” Sirius whispered.
“Aye, aye.” Everyone cheered.
Peter grinned. “We’re up to no good.”
James smiled back. “Then let us manage our mischief well.”
WIth that the group commenced, exiting the abandoned classroom they used and taking off to class. James walked by your side as you headed to astronomy together.
“I can’t wait till we pin this down. It’s going to be an epic year.” he grinned.
You chuckle. “I know you’ll end up stalking someone, Potter. Evans by the looks of it.”
He shook his head, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Nope. I’m gonna stalk you instead. See if you’re hiding any secrets from me.”
You smile. “What secrets could I possibly be hiding from you, my boy?”
James nudged your side with a smirk. “You’re telling me a good-looking fellow like yourself isn’t sneaking off with some other lad other than their best friends.”
You shook your head, the word “good-looking” repeating itself in your mind. “No. If I did I would tell you.”
“Good.” he said, starting up the stairs to the Astronomy tower. “I don’t need some arsehole stealing you away from me.”
You roll your eyes. “No one could ever steal me from you, James. I’m not a Quaffle.”
He nods with a grin. “Yeah. I suppose you’re more of a Snitch.”
You laugh, dashing up the stairs in hopes that you wouldn’t be late for your Astronomy lesson.
---
As one could guess more pictures and sketches made their home on James Potter’s wall. It was a cluttered mess but beautiful nonetheless. It was as though the wall had an expression of its own with its array of Quidditch jerseys, photographs, art, and ticket stubs. Nobody touched the wall except James as he liked having every picture in place. His wall organized the way he liked it best… messy.
Fifth year was the first year you didn’t see James every week. He had eagerly signed up for Quidditch camp and had left for Wales with promises that’d you write about the boys and the progress on the map and Animagi projects. The projects went well with Peter completing the outline sketches of the maps, Remus filling piles of papers on Animagi transformations and finally Sirius and you gathering the needed ingredients for the Animagi process.
You had grown taller over the summer, hair lightening and your features more accentuated. Eagerly you awaited James’s return and when the time did come you had woken up early in the morning to see him arrive by Portkey on the hill. The second he appeared you had rushed over, engulfing him in a hug. You had missed his touch, his constant nagging and overall the James Potterness that followed him around that would never fade with time.
Meanwhile, he was left out of breath, a couple of inches taller and a smile on his face as he squeezed you back. “Y/N/N! I missed you, you lazy hag.”
You laughed, messing up his hair that sat more neatly than in previous years. “And I missed you, my boy.”
The next days before school were spent catching him up on the map and at the pond by your house. With each swim you noticed the changes in James such as the six-pack the tedious trials at Quidditch camp had given him.
“Oi!” you shouted, splashing him in the face. “Whatever happened to the skinny twig that was my friend?”
He smirked. “Oi! Why are you looking?”
You bit your lip, not allowing him to see you flustered. “I’m sorry. You’re my best friend and it’s a very noticeable change!” you pointed at his toned stomach.
James tapped your nose and you stared at him in annoyance. “It’s only noticeable if you want to notice it.”
He turned around, making to walk back to the shore of the pond. You didn’t remember when James had gotten so cheeky although he’d always been that way, just never with you. Wickedly, you took the bucket that floated beside you and dunked it in the water. With a mischievous grin, you snuck up behind him, dumping the bucket of water on his head.
James turned around with a gasp, jaw dropped. You laughed, a wide smile on your lips at the sight of him drenched in his swim trunks. It wasn’t until his arms tucked along your waist, dragging you to the deeper ends of the pond did the smile drop and his return.
“Why you little…” you seethed. “James Fleamont Potter if you-”
It was too late by then, your body submerged in the water and you swam up, his laughter the first noticeable sound. You scowled as he doubled over with laughter on the shore. “I’m never letting you go to Quidditch camp again.”
The two of you walked home as the sun set, many flicks to the forehead ensuing as you did.
---
Fifth year was by far the most epic year of your Hogwarts experience. Everything was prepared for the Animagi transformation and phase two of the map project was ready to launch with Remus having gained access to the restricted section of the library.
It seemed as though the whole student body had recognized the change in James’s physique which only led to an inflation of his ego. The worst part was that Lily Evans just so happened to be one of those said noticers and while her defiance toward him was still strong, she could be caught staring in class much to James’s delight.
The Animagi process began as soon as the September full moon. While Remus suffered in the Shrieking Shack, the four other Marauders set their Mandrake leaves into their mouths preparing for an uncomfortable month of bitterness on their tongues. The leaves were held under their tongues when talking in class and for the rest of the time they resorted to note passing leaving the entirety of Hogwarts wondering why the Marauders went quiet so suddenly.
During the period between moons, they worked on their map. Stacks of books, both regular and restricted, lay among them. Each had a quill and parchment used to take note of spells or pass messages back and forth. As you worked you received a message from James in the form of a crumpled ball of parchment. You smoothed it out with a sigh.
I hate this thing. It tastes like piss and lime.
You held back a chuckle, writing your own message next to his.
You’re not backing out of this, Potter. It’s for Remus.
He stuck the leaf under his tongue in order to stick it out at you and you rolled your eyes. He scribbled a message back.
I know. I know. Doesn’t mean I can’t complain about it.
You smirked, tossing the parchment back to him.
If your scrawny arse can come back from Quidditch camp with abs then you can stomach keeping a leaf in your mouth for a month.
He smoothed it out and you went back to your work only getting in a minute's reading before the parchment bounced off your head. You scowled at his antics but he only looked at his book with a smirk. Unfolding the paper, James’s messy handwriting took up the last blank space on the parchment.
Nice to know you still think about my abs.
Your stomach squirmed at the feeling that inflamed from his words and the smirk that was on his face. You flicked him on the head, throwing the parchment into the fire before Sirius could ask what it was.
---
It took moon soaked leaves, untouched morning dew and a lightning storm to finally complete the transformations. It was on a late November night that a lightning storm finally struck and in the fifth corridor bathroom the Marauders made their first transformations. For Peter, a small rat with a wriggling tail. For Sirius, a pure black dog. For James, a large stag with mighty horns. For you, a sly fox with sleek orange fur.
Thus that night began the use of the nicknames: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs and Vixen. Dubbed by James and agreed upon all around. The final full moons of fifth year were spent prancing around Hogsmeade alongside Remus whose scars diminished with each transformation spent with his friends.
The downside of it all was the building tension in the school. With Lord Voldemort on the rise, more and more of your classmates were showing their true colors. Select Slytherins no longer wore short sleeves, their wrists always covered even in the heat of summer. Watchful eyes and protective glares, you went home for summer in worry.
Over the summer, Prongs lost his Pronginess. He wrote to Lily Evans most days of the week and now the things she sent him hung on his wall alongside you and the Marauders. An anticipated change but a scary one still. Every outing with James became more about Lily and less about anything else. You could feel your best friend slipping away and you told him so the night before the start of sixth year.
The two of you sat together in the branches of a tree. The sun hit your skin in rays and clouds passed by over your heads. James’s voice droned on about his darling Lily flower and with an unknowing malice you snapped at him. “Shut it!” you groaned.
His eyes looked over at you, hands holding your head in remorse. “Aren’t you happy for me? You’ve been acting off all summer.”
“I’ve been acting off because you’ve been acting off. I am happy for you but Evans is the only thing you talk about these days. What happened to talking about the Tornados or sneaking out together for milkshakes?”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “It’s different now.”
“Well, it shouldn’t be.” you exclaim. “I’m not saying you shouldn’t grow up. I support the idea of you no longer being a cheeky bastard. If you’re happy with Evans then I am happy for you. But being with Evans doesn’t mean you have to forget about me or the Marauders or everything else.”
James nodded, a leaf spinning between his fingers as he frowned. “I’m sorry, Y/N/N.”
You shake your head. “I am too. Sorry I snapped at you, my boy.” your head fell onto his shoulder the same way it had done for years only this time things had changed. The weight still felt perfect on his shoulder but now his stomach turned and his breath hitched at the close proximity. Things were indeed changing although the two of you only danced around it, not wanting to address the mess you two had made.
Your head was still against his shoulder as you spoke quietly. “Just remember you’re not a Quaffle.”
He chuckled, stroking your hair affectionately. “I guess I’ll be the snitch then.”
You smiled, swimming in the feel of the James Potter you knew so well. Later that night, the two of you snuck out like old times, sharing a chocolate milkshake and sending each other glances the whole way home.
---
Sixth year was a rollercoaster. The map was finished, all the efforts poured out finally receiving an equally impressive outcome with the parchment branded with the names of the Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs and Vixen. Remus had his first kiss and Sirius decided on leaving home and James welcomed him with open arms.
The other Marauders were not impartial to the changes in your and James’s behavior. The miniscule changes in his face when you napped on his lap or the flush of your skin when he rustled your hair. In all honesty, it was as though the two of you were finally waking up and seeing what they’d been seeing all along. However, your own defiance was strong and love wasn’t simple. James was still under the impression that his heart beat for Lily Evans and you flirted around your feelings as opposed to finally confronting them.
When Gryffindor won the Quidditch season, you were the first one in James’s arms to congratulate him. He spun you around, a large grin on his face. “We won!”
You smiled. “That you did, my boy. Celebration calls and are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
He tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “Hmm? Let me guess… Firewhiskey?”
“That’s my boy.” you cheer, linking your arm in his and dragging him off the field as Lily Evans watched the boy she had taken a chance on run off with someone else.
---
Firewhiskey made for a fine celebration and resulted in James and you collapsed on the floor of the Gryffindor common room at two in the morning. His glasses were crooked as he stared up at the ceiling and your hair fell in waves on the floorboards.
“Blimey, I can’t believe we won.” James chuckled, his words slurring together slightly.
“You deserve it, my boy.” you say, lightly punching his arm. “How are you feeling on this fine evening?”
His cheeks went pink but a smile overtook his features making for a hilarious expression when he shouted out. “Randy!”
You doubled over with laughter. “Gosh, James. I don’t need to hear about this.” you shove his grinning face with your palm.
“What, you've never felt randy before?” he asked, a childlike expression on his face juxtaposing such an intrusive question.
You hide your embarrassment behind a grin. “Yes, but I’m not going around telling you about it.”
He tapped your nose with the tip of his finger and your stomach swirled. “And why not?”
You turned over to your side. “I’m not sure best friends tell each other about being randy, Prongs.”
James sighed. “I guess not. But how are you feeling, my little vixen?”
With a swig of your drink and a grin you reply. “Randy.”
The two of you erupt into fits of laughter. James pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I suppose it’s the whiskey then.”
You stare up at the ceiling. “Yeah, I suppose so.”
Both of you knew that wasn’t the case. You knew that despite the whiskey slowing the gears of your mind you still noticed James’s hand laying by your waist. You could still trace the outline of his chin and the bridge of his nose. James could still see the curve of your lips and the rise of your chest. Firewhiskey was most definitely not the cause of your randiness.
But it was the easiest thing to blame.
---
Your birthday came soon after with the Marauders celebrating in joy. Presents were exchanged with Remus giving you some books, Peter knitted (with the help of his mother) a pair of mittens for you and Sirius had gifted you a record to play on your stereo.
But James had to be extravagant. It wasn’t everyday his best friend turned seventeen and he marked the occasion with something expensive yet meaningful. When you opened the small box inside had been a silver fox ring. It’s eyes sparkling gems that twinkled as if blinking.
“James, I’m going to kill you.” you seethed. “This is way too expensive. I’m turning seventeen not fifty.”
He laughed. “Oi, woman! It’s fine. Nothing I couldn’t handle. Besides, only the best for you.”
You stared at it once more before engulfing him in a hug. “It’s beautiful, my boy. Thank you.”
His arms squeezed your waist, breathing you in and remembering the sweet smells of childhood and friendship rolled into one. His eyes closed and it was as if he had drifted off into a pleasant dream. “Of course, my little vixen.”
You made certain to flick his head after.
He was starting to regret giving it to you already.
---
Sixth year came to a close with an even more devastating end than the last. The war only continued to rage with Muggles being murdered miles away from the school, Muggle-borns driving into hiding. Sirius’s brother was slowly falling into line with the other Slytherins, devoting their hours to the torture of Muggleborns, Lord Voldemort and the likes.
James left Hogwarts heart-broken when Lily Evans broke up with him on the last day of term. “Look around!” Lily had told him. “You’re blind, James. I’m not the person you want and it’d be clear if you’d stop and take a look.”
He hadn’t known what she meant and the first week of summer was spent crying and eating ice cream on the sofa with you by his side. His room had become a mess and Lily’s letters no longer remained on the wall instead crumbled up in a ball in the trash.
Euphemia Potter couldn’t dread to see her son in the dumps any longer and she made sure to tell him so one evening after you had left.
“James, you need to get your life together, my love.” she whispered, rubbing her sons back reassuringly.
His words came out muffled into her neck. “It’s hard.”
“I know.” she soothed. “And I’m always going to be there for you.”
“Promise?” he asked.
“Promise.” she smiled. “Now how about you go clean your room. It’s become quite dirty.”
He nodded, trudging to his room with a broom. Lily’s words repeated in his mind as he entered. “You’re blind, James. Look around!” But there was nothing to look for. All he saw was his wall and a soft smile came to his face as he approached it. The Tutshill Tornado banners clung loosely to the paint and drawings of Kneazles and landscapes and trees. Pictures of the Marauders and Gryffindor lions.
And finally the ones of you.
His fingers ran across the picture in the middle. Four-year old James grinning and you licking a lolly. His eyes moved to the next one, seven years old and flying together on a broomstick. A grin broke out on his face as he saw the one with your owl in Diagon Alley, his fingers flicking your forehead. James’s mind was on hyperdrive as he examined each picture, one common factor in almost all of them.
You.
You were in many of the photos, a smile adorned on your face. If you weren’t in the photos you were the one taking them, knowing how much he adored them. Any pictures that hung were sketched by your hands. Here was James Potter’s open story, the story of his life all plastered to the wall as though it was an empty canvas. Present in every moment, every aspect, had been you. You had been the start of his book, the picture of the two of you as tots still smacked in the middle of the wall. Yes, he realized. You had started his book and had remained in it for quite some time.
Lily Evans must’ve noticed and maybe everyone else had too.
James had been blind to the message that was sprawled across his wall. He had been the one writing it, maybe not knowingly but writing it out all the same. Everyone had seen it except the writer and his subject, the message painstakingly clear years prior to its conception.
He quickly removed all the pictures from the wall, grabbing each one that hung and piling them up in his hand. The door swung open as he dashed out of his room yelling, “I’ve got to go, mum!” before running out the front door. The hills of green were illuminated by the night sky, the stars burned for James as he hopped over branches and boulders to get to you.
Your house was in the distance, your figure standing a few feet away from the home. He called out to you, your eyes turned to meet his. When he reached you, he paused, catching his breath.
“James, what on Earth are you doing here?” you laugh, placing a hand on his shoulder as he breathed.
He stood up straight, panting as he held up a photo. “This is us when we were four. The first photo we ever took together.”
You squinted at him. “Right?”
He shuffled through the pictures, fingers tracing each one. “And this is from when we were seven. That one from when we were ten. You gave me this drawing when we were six because you loved Kneazles and wanted one as a pet. That drawing was from the first year when we went skipping stones at the Black Lake and you sketched me and Peter.”
Your face melts slowly. “James, I don’t understand. You’ve had these for years.”
He exhaled, his eyes lighting up. “That’s the thing. I never saw it till now but Lily said I was blind and that she wasn’t the person I wanted.” You nod, wiping the sweat from his forehead with your sleeve and he grinned. “See that right there. That’s what I want.”
The night air bit at your spine. “You want me to wipe the sweat from your forehead?”
He shook his head with a soft chuckle. “Not exactly. I want you to wipe the sweat from my forehead for the next year and the next ten and then the next fifty. You’ve been doing it for years already and the thing is… I don’t think I want anyone else doing it for me.”
You blinked as he came closer, his palms cradling your cheek as you gazed into his eyes. “You’ve been in my life for as long as I could remember and I want you to stay in it for as long as I live. You told me once to not throw around the l-word and I said…”
“But I’ve known you my whole life.” you mutter.
“I think I’ve loved you for a while. I just didn’t know it yet.”
You shook your head as the wind rustled the branches, the windchime on your porch creating soft melodies. A large grin spread across your lips yet you continued to shake your head. “There’s a war, James.”
He smiled. “Only more the reason to be with me.”
“But I’ve been with you my whole life.” you tease.
“Oh, shut up!” he chuckles, before leaning down to capture your lips. At that moment everything made sense. All the pieces of the puzzle sifted into place and the stars applauded you from the sky and the night gale created a ruckus at your shed blindfold.
“Be my Snitch?” he asked.
You rolled your eyes, “That’s the cringiest thing you’ve ever said, my boy.”
He smirked. “Oh, but you love it.”
“Perhaps I do.” you replied, flicking his forehead for good measure.
---
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CHAPTER 25
- i wonder how old the Elder Steward truly is, and how much longer than average she’s managed to hold the shadow back.
- “i told you that there was more than one way to fight.” i maintain my theory that the Elder Steward knows the truth about Will and is trying to foster in him the strength and conviction to fight, internally, to not let the Dark King take him over or corrupt him. it’s not swords or magic that he needs to fight with.
- i’d love to know what else the Elder Steward knew about Violet’s background. is it just something that she senses, or infers from Violet’s strength? or did she actually know something about Violet’s mother? is that double lion lineage going to be relevant later on?
- “i have no shieldmate. my vow is to your father, and he is dead.” i think, the first time i read this, i interpreted that as Jannick. but now that i think about it, it would’ve had to have been Cyprian’s biological father. janissaries obviously wouldn’t be anyone’s shieldmate 😅 that’s only a Steward thing. we don’t know when they lost him, but it was presumably at least 6 years ago for his children to have been taken in by another man. i wonder how many shieldmates Euphemia had over the course of her unusually long life. Justice said you can’t form a new bond while your old one is active. how many shieldmates has Euphemia killed or watched die before her? how many times has she taken the vow with someone new, knowing that she would likely outlive them as well?
- the thought of them gathering up all those bodies. i think they said earlier that there were hundreds of people living in the hall. all brutally murdered and left where they fell. god.
- Will admits that he doesn’t trust himself, but that the Elder Steward’s faith in him helped him bolster him. my theory holds.
- “‘you didn’t do this. you don’t carry the blame.’ the words were a knife in Will’s gut.” because, in a way, he did. both because his past life was responsible for the bargain struck in the first place, and because he in this life wasn’t the hero they needed to stop it, like they thought he was.
- but he still shows empathy to Cyprian. shows him the kindness and support that he wishes someone had shown to him. he can’t be bad at heart, i swear. 😭
- ps, this may be a bad time to acknowledge it, but Cyprian isn’t truly the last of his kind. “he carried a history inside him that was shared with no one else” but.....he shares it with James. and the potential of that fascinates and intrigues me.
- everything about Cyprian in this scene wounds be deeply. his insistence that he shouldn’t be the last of them. like, if it was going to be anyone, it should’ve been Marcus, or Justice, or Leda, or the Elder Steward. someone worthy of representing their entire culture, their history. an embodiment of their purpose. anyone but him.
- Grace comparing Euphemia to Will’s mother. how much that must sting.
- there’s something poetic about the new Final Flame being lit from the funeral pyre of the Stewards. phoenix-like, almost. new hope rising from the ashes of defeat.
- Cyprian making this vow, to guard against the dark alone, to be the light when there is none. this is the only scene in the book that brought real tears to my eyes.
CHAPTER 26
- Justice as Violet’s surrogate big brother, and now she’s lost him too 😭
- with the composure Grace displays, i’m sure she would’ve made a hell of a Steward if her blood was stronger.
- god i wonder what their darkest hour is going to be, if this doesn’t qualify. what will it take for it to be time to call for the lost King? whatever that means, however it’s going to manifest.
- Devon sounds like he has the same resentment towards the Stewards that James does. they both describe them as self-righteous. makes sense, having both been the victim of that righteousness. James ousted for a past life he has no control over and doesn’t even remember, merely tainted by association, and Devon hunted down and mutilated, robbed of his horn so it could be a tool in their noble crusade. at least the dark side is honest about their darkness.
- what a fucking plot twist this is alkdfjgh
- again i wonder, if Devon the Unicorn once had an animal form alongside his human one, what about the Lions? “you’re more like me than you are like them.”
- will Devon get a more prominent role in the next book? i feel like, for him to get any POV time at all, he’ll have to be more important than he’s been so far. this section doesn’t tell us all that much and it’s not really relevant to the plot that happens in this book. it showcases an interesting dynamic though and sets Devon up a little more as a character.
- who did he think might’ve come to see him, if not Robert? “a figure impossible and long dead.” Sarcean? Will? someone else?
- this is such an interesting dynamic, and for all that we only see it for a moment, it really tugs on the heartstrings. Robert sounds like his surrogate father, and a really good one at that.
- another character who heals quickly (though not, i notice, as quickly as James does).
- this shocked me so deeply upon my first read. it still shocks me, but i suppose that quote explains it. the fear of being hunted. the fear that kindness only masks a long game. the horn itself both a gift and a reminder of what humans are capable of and how little they can be trusted. it’s safer, i’m sure he feels, to have no connections, to not let himself fall prey to a weakness like this. he’s already let himself invest far too much, if he felt so safe in this man’s presence, even fully bared and known.
CHAPTER 27
- how does Violet get back through the door without Cyprian with her 😅 he opened the gate from inside, but i feel like that’s not how it was established to work, lol.
- “did you kill anyone? no judgment if you did, dude, i just gotta know”
- “he found himself instead looking into the blank faces of a novitiate and two janissaries who knew everything about morning chants and ancient swords and nothing about the basic geography of london.” idk why this is so funny to me 😂😂😂 Will like “wow you people are useless thanks”
- James James James James James
- “do you want it the way it wants you?” this whole concept is deliciously fucked up, that it has a lure to it, even for its victim.
- it really is funny that their grand plan is always to sneak up on James and whack him over the head, and it’s even funnier than it works, TWICE.
- the mental image of James “satisfyingly roughed up” is just -chef’s kiss-
- (do i get similar vibes from the Collar and Laurent’s sapphire pet earring? opulent and seductive, a temptation and an invitation, turning the wearer into an object one might possess? perhaps. only this one comes with the tantalizingly badwrong magical coercion aspect alkdfjgh)
- James, god. the indignity of having his victimization exposed against his will. his first plea that they not let his father have control over him. what does that MEAN? what are the implications there?? i have no idea how to unpack that.
- “you served Simon of your own free will.” i wonder how much of that is true. it’s true that James has done horrific things in this life, collar-free, but i wonder about the difference between non-consent and unwilling consent in this circumstance. we learn shortly that the threat of the Collar has been present for James since he was 12. he’s known what it was and that Simon intended to use it on him when the opportunity arose. i wonder how much of the actions he takes are in the hopes that, if he lives up to Simon’s expectations and does what Simon wants freely, he won’t be forced into complete subjugation. he’ll be doing the same thing either way, the resulting carnage will be the same, but at least this way he retains some semblance of agency and, eventually, a chance to escape. i have thoughts. and questions.
- the Emery thing comes so out of nowhere 😂 esp cuz 1) Emery’s already dead by this point, 2) James says since they were 11, but 11 is also the age that he left the Hall. but Cyprian doesn’t argue that point so apparently he did know that Emery was in love with James before it all went to hell.
- yeah, “dangerously provocative” sums James up pretty well
- ok it is past midnight, i am CLOSING the book. i am going to be responsible and not continue to the next chapter immediately. i am suffering but i am being so brave about it.
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