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moons-and-mobility-aids · 2 days ago

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Halo~~ can I request and Poly!Marauders (James, Sirius and Remus) x fem!reader? Where reader has recurring hypoglycemia and ends up standing the boys up on a date because her levels had been finicky all day and she forgot to tell them. So when they go find her to confront her about it they find her on the floor on like the verge of unconsciousness (or maybe she's already passed out) with dangerously low levels and help her like the good loving boyfriend's they are. Pretty please 🥺

Thank you for this request! I had fun with it, and I hope this works for you! 💞 Poly!marauders x fem!reader 💞 2.2k words

The sun dips lower in the sky, painting hues of lavender and pink across the horizon. It's the perfect backdrop for the evening you've been anticipating all week with James, Sirius, and Remus—a night filled with laughter and camaraderie. They've planned something big, no doubt; James has been jokingly boasting about his "romantic genius," while Sirius grins like a Cheshire cat and Remus rolls his eyes, though the corners of his mouth twitch upwards. Their good humour is infectious, and you can't help but look forward to whatever they have in store.

But today, your body doesn't seem to be on the same page as your mind. You've woken up with trembling hands and a light head, your blood sugar levels fluctuating in a way that makes your stomach churn. You're not new to hypoglycaemia—you've had episodes before, each one leaving you weak and shaky—but today it lingers, refusing to let go despite your best efforts to stabilise it. You push through, hoping to shake it off, but the fatigue clings to you like a second skin, weighing you down.

"Just a little rest," you tell yourself, sinking into the couch. "I'll feel better after."

Setting an alarm, you allow your eyes to flutter closed, promising yourself that it's only for a moment before you get ready. You know you should let the boys in on what's happening, but the thought of explaining—of offering up excuses yet again—seems too daunting. Too draining. Instead, you tell yourself it will pass. It always does. A quick nap should help; then you can join them, fresh-faced and ready for the evening's escapades.

---

The air is thick with tension at the small restaurant where you agreed to meet. James sits with his back to the wall, his foot tapping out a rhythm of worry against the table leg. He checks his watch for the tenth time in as many minutes, his brow furrowed.

"She's late," he mutters, though everyone at the table is painfully aware. "She's never late."

Sirius glances toward the door again, his usual swagger replaced by something more akin to concern. "Maybe she got held up," he offers, but there's a tightness in his voice that belies his nonchalant exterior.

Remus's eyes flicker between the two, worry etching deep lines in his already weary face. "She would've sent word if she couldn't make it—she always does."

James rubs a hand through his unruly hair, the action doing nothing to quell the unease that creeps into every crevice of his being. "That's what has me worried," he admits, gaze far off. "It's not like her to just... vanish."

"Then we should go and see for ourselves if she's all right," Remus suggests, rising from his seat. The chair scrapes against the floor, a grating sound that mirrors the tension threading through each man's veins. "Better safe than sorry."

"Agreed." Sirius pushes away from the table, his frame rigid with an intensity borne of concern. "Let's go."

Without another word, they leave the restaurant behind, its warmth and light becoming a distant memory as they step into the biting night air. Their footfalls echo down the empty streets, a testament to their shared apprehension.

The apartment is eerily still as they approach, the silence hanging heavy in the air like a shroud. Something about it feels wrong, disjointed, and Sirius is the first to cross the threshold, his heart pounding in his chest. "Y/N?" he calls out, his voice laced with both worry and hope. But there's no answer, just the echo of his own words bouncing off the walls.

James follows closely behind him, his eyes scanning the room for any signs of you. Remus brings up the rear, his gaze taking in every detail, a frown etching deep lines into his forehead.

"Over here!" James' shout breaks the tense quietude, his voice edged with panic. He's found you unconscious on the couch, your body too still. In an instant, he's at your side, dropping to his knees and pressing two fingers against your pulse point.

"She's breathing," he says, relief washing over him, but it's short-lived. "It's shallow, though. And her pulse... It's too fast."

Before he can say anything more, Remus is already moving, his long strides carrying him to the kitchen where the emergency kit is kept. His hands are steady as he reaches for the Baqsimi nasal spray, fingers deftly peeling away the red stripe that seals it. The lid comes off with a soft pop, revealing the small device within.

Sirius kneels beside James, his hand cupping your cheek as his thumb brushes lightly against your skin. His face is a mask of fear, guilt, and resolve. "Why didn't she tell us?" he murmurs more to himself than anyone else, the question hanging heavily in the air.

He turns to Remus, his grey eyes hardening. "Are you ready?"

"Always," Remus replies with a steady voice that belies the tremor in his hands. He positions the nozzle of the spray into one of your nostrils, his brow furrowed in concentration. "This should help. Just hold on."

With a gentle push, he depresses the plunger, watching as the green line marking the dose disappears. There's a collective holding of breaths as they wait for any sign of change.

"We've got to hope for the best," Sirius says, though his voice wavers slightly. "She'll pull through. She has to."

"Of course she will," James adds, his fingers tightening around yours, as if he could will you back to consciousness through sheer force of grip. His free hand finds your other cheek, his thumb tracing circles over the cool skin. "She's stronger than this."

Remus is already moving again, his long fingers sifting through the cupboards for the quick sugars he knows you keep on hand. He retrieves a carton of orange juice and a box of crackers, sparing no time in spreading peanut butter across the crackers and pouring out a glass of juice. Once prepared, he places the items on the low coffee table before sinking onto the edge of the couch. "We should give her these when she comes around."

The room falls into a tense silence as they wait, their gazes never straying far from your prone form. Sirius's hand hovers over your shoulder before finally making contact, his knuckles ghosting over the fabric of your shirt. His eyes, usually so full of mischief, are shadowed with concern. "She scared us," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper.

"More than that," James says, his tone gruff with unshed emotion. "I can't—"

His sentence hangs unfinished, the weight of it too heavy for words. Instead, he reaches out, brushing away a stray lock of hair from your forehead, his touch gentle, almost reverent.

And then, so faint it's nearly missed, there's a shift. A soft groan escapes your lips, barely audible but enough to cause their hearts to leap. Your eyelids flutter, struggling against the pull of unconsciousness.

"Finally," Sirius mutters, relief flooding his features even as his brows knit together in a scowl. "Took your sweet time, didn't you?"

James leans in closer, his breath hitching as your eyes begin to open. He presses a warm kiss to your forehead, lingering for a moment before pulling back. "You're okay," he says, his words more of a prayer than a statement. "We've got you."

Sirius moves to help you sit up; his touch is steady, firm yet careful, like he's afraid you might shatter at any moment. The room spins slightly as you're lifted, but Sirius' presence is grounding, a reminder of reality amidst the haze of confusion.

"Easy there," Remus says, his voice soft yet commanding. A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth, not quite reaching his eyes, which remain clouded with concern. He picks up the glass from the coffee table, the contents sloshing gently.

"Here," Remus coaxes, holding the straw to your lips. "Take small sips, slowly."

The juice is cold and slightly tart in your mouth, a stark contrast to the warmth spreading from your core. You reach to hold the glass, but your hands shake, the tremors betraying the weakness you feel. Remus keeps his grip on the glass, steady as always.

You try to sit up straighter, to focus on the faces hovering around you, but every movement feels heavy, slow. The room tilts a little, and you wince, shutting your eyes. When you open them again, they're still there, all watching you, their expressions etched with concern.

"What..." Your voice is a raspy whisper, barely there. "What happened?"

"Scared the bloody hell out of us, you did," Sirius says, his tone equal parts relief and frustration. He leans back in his chair, passing a hand across his face. "We found you passed out. Your blood sugar was dangerously low."

"We used the nasal spray," Remus explains, his voice steady despite the gravity of his words. "You're lucky it acted quickly."

Your brow furrows as you try to make sense of the day's events. "I—" You begin, but your throat constricts around the admission. "I didn't mean to..."

"We know," James says quietly, his hand covering yours where it rests on the cup. "But you need to tell us when you're not feeling well, love. We could've stepped in sooner."

"I didn't want to ruin the date," you mumble, guilt curdling in your stomach.

"Ruin?" Remus's eyebrows knit together. "That's not how this works." His tone is stern but laced with worry, not anger. "Your health comes first, always. You could have—" He stops, a grimace passing over his face as if the words themselves are painful. "You could have taken a turn for the worse before we found you."

"Exactly," Sirius interjects, his voice softer than before. "You don't spoil anything by telling us you need help. We love you, Y/N."

A lump forms in your throat as tears prick at the corners of your eyes. You cast your gaze down to the cup of juice. "I'm sorry."

"Hey." James reaches out, gently tilting your chin up until you're looking at him. The concern in his hazel eyes is almost too much to bear. "No more apologies, all right? Just let us help you. That's what we want."

The corners of Sirius's mouth lift into a small smile, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes. He leans forward, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head—a gesture that feels as much a promise as it does an act of care. "Exactly. You're not getting rid of us that easily, so you might as well let us look after you."

Remus chuckles softly, though there's a tightness in his shoulders that suggests he's far from relaxed. "And speaking of which—finish the juice. Then we'll get some food in you."

"I'm fine," you murmur, but it's a feeble protest at best.

James's grin is slight, more a quirk of the lips than a full smile, but it's there, a glimmer of light amid the shadows. He picks up a cracker spread with peanut butter and extends it towards you. "Come on, open up. Don't make me do the airplane noises."

Your lips quirk despite yourself, a response to James's levity. You take the offered morsel, and for a moment, the air in the room loosens, the tension fraying at its edges as they watch you eat.

Remus shakes his head, the ghost of a smile playing on his lips. "You're lucky we look out for you."

"And you'll never hear the end of it," Sirius adds, his grin broadening. "We'll remind you every chance we get."

James lets out a quiet chuckle, but it quickly fades, replaced by a solemn expression. "Good," he says, his gaze steady on yours. "Because we won't let this happen again."

You finish the juice and crackers, every last crumb swept away, and as the warmth gradually returns to your body, so too does a sense of calm. James tucks a blanket around your shoulders, ensuring you're as comfortable as possible. Sirius settles beside you, his arm a steady presence around your shoulders while Remus remains at your feet, gently massaging your ankle.

James sits on the floor in front of you, his back resting against the edge of the coffee table. There's a tranquillity to him that wasn't there before, a resolution settling over his features. "You need to rest now," he tells you, not as an order but as a suggestion born from concern. "We'll stay."

"Staying?" The word slips out before you can stop it, a small voice daring to hope. "You're not leaving?"

"Absolutely not," Sirius says, his voice firm and unyielding. "We're staying here tonight. You won't be alone."

Remus's eyes lift to meet yours, meeting your gaze with a gentle warmth that defies the harsh reality of your situation. "Of course not," he replies, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"Until you're fed up with us," James adds, his own grin small but genuine.

A weak chuckle escapes your lips, though it does little to alleviate the tension coiled in your chest. "I don't think that's possible."

And as sleep begins to pull you under, the last thing you feel is the pressure of Sirius's hand on your skin, grounding you in this new reality. The last thing you hear is James's voice, low and steady as he whispers, "Always."

#Poly!marauders x reader #poly!marauders x you #Sirius black x reader #Sirius black x you #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #james potter x you #james potter x reader #marauders era #marauders au #marauders fanfic

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latenightreadingpdf · 3 days ago

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The Cutest Thing - Sirius Black

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: When you visit the Marauders' dorm to ask Remus for help with your Charms homework, you're surprised to find a large black dog in the room.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

You hurried through the hallways of Gryffindor Tower, clutching your Charms textbook and muttering to yourself. The essay Flitwick assigned was due tomorrow, and you were in desperate need of help. Luckily, Remus Lupin was your go-to for all things academic, and you figured he wouldn’t mind you dropping by the Marauders’ dorm.

When you reached their door, you knocked softly at first, then a bit louder when no one answered. From inside, you could hear what sounded like… barking? Frowning, you knocked again. Still no answer. The barking continued, frantic and insistent.

Worried something was wrong, you slowly pushed the door open.

“Hello? Remus?”

The scene that greeted you was not what you expected. Remus was sitting cross-legged on his bed, nose buried in a book. James was lounging on his bed, tossing a ball in the air, while Peter sat at the desk scribbling something on parchment. In the center of the room was a large, black dog pawing at Remus, barking as if trying to get his attention.

You froze in the doorway.

James noticed you first, the ball dropping to his chest with a thud. “When did you get here?”

You gestured at the dog. “Uh… whose dog is that?”

All three boys froze, exchanging a fleeting, panicked glance.

“Oh, him?” James said quickly, sitting up. “We, uh, found him outside. Poor thing was injured, so we brought him in to heal him up.”

Your heart melted instantly. “Oh, you poor thing!” You crouched down, extending a hand toward the dog. “C’mere, boy.”

The dog—who had been ignoring the boys entirely—turned to you immediately, tail wagging furiously. He sniffed your hand, then began licking it enthusiastically.

You laughed, scratching behind his ears. “You’re the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. And your fur is so soft!”

The dog leaned into your touch, practically vibrating with joy.

James cleared his throat. “Yeah, he’s, uh, a good boy. Aren’t you, boy?”

“What are you going to do with him after he’s healed?” you asked, looking up at the boys.

The dog let out a whine, nudging your hand with his nose.

“Not sure yet,” Remus said tightly, glaring at the dog as if it had personally insulted him. “Probably just let him back out where we found him.”

You frowned, running your fingers through the dog’s fur. “That’s so sad. I’ll miss you so much, boy.”

The dog whined louder, pressing his head into your lap.

James stood abruptly. “Well, it’s getting late! You should probably head back to your dorm now.”

You blinked. “It’s six o’clock?”

“Yep, still, you’ve got a big day tomorrow,” James said, ushering you toward the door.

“Alright, alright, I’m going,” you laughed, giving the dog one last scratch behind the ears. “Bye, cutie!”

The dog barked, wagging his tail so hard it thumped against the bedpost.

The moment the door closed behind you, Remus rounded on the dog.

“Change back, now.”

With a shimmer of fur and a crack, Sirius Black stood in the middle of the room, his trademark smirk firmly in place.

“Did you hear her?” he asked, looking positively delighted. “She said I was the cutest!”

Peter groaned, dropping his head into his hands.

Remus scowled. “You’re insufferable.”

“I can’t help it,” Sirius said, throwing himself onto James’s bed dramatically. “I’ve got the charm—both human and canine.”

James rolled his eyes. “Just don’t get too comfortable, Pads. She’ll find out eventually.”

“And when she does,” Sirius said, grinning like a maniac, “she’ll already think I’m adorable.”

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

A/N ~ just a short little blurb because I’m bored

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moonstruckme · 2 days ago

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hi, just wanted to mention that i love ur fics—they’re all vv sweet and creative <3

for the snow angels could you write a ice-skater!reader x ice-skater marauder (either sirius or even poly!wolfstar)

also if you’re open to doing it, could you write it so the reader is deaf (and uses sign language? if not that’s perfectly fine ♥️♥️)

Hi sweetheart, thank you so much! That's really kind of you <3

cw: I don't have a ton of experience with the deaf community so if anything in here is inaccurate or offensive please feel free to let me know and I'll try to change it

figure skater!Sirius x hearing impaired!figure skater!reader ♡ 464 words

You come out of your spin, and your eyes seek Sirius immediately. It’s a habit, an instinct, and lately almost a magnetic pull. You find him watching you from across the rink with a fond uptilt to his lips. There’s a look on his face that lets you know what he’s going to do even before he signs, “Hold on.”

You huff a laugh to yourself but do as he says. Sirius does this more and more often lately—fretting over your cold hands, wanting to warm them in his own. It’s like he forgets you’ve been skating without gloves your whole life, or somehow forgets that his hands are just as cold, since he goes without them too to sign at you.

“Aren’t you freezing?” he signs, mouth forming the words as he does, just before he gets to you. He rubs his hands together, taking yours between them. He blows a loose strand of hair away from his face. It floats right back.

You know it’s only a matter of time until Sirius tries to coax you back off the ice for a hot chocolate. “Come on, sweetheart, my treat,” he always says, as if you’re going along for the free watery hot chocolate and not just to spend time with him. Lately, something has shifted in the dynamic between you and Sirius. He spends maybe half his time at the rink actually skating, the other half signing to you from across the rink and warming your hands. And you spend most of your time thinking about him.

You pull your hands from his. “Did you see my layback?” you ask, mouth pulling sideways into a grimace.

Sirius mirrors your expression, though you can see his smile peeking through. “I saw. You’ll get it, you just need to get your back leg in the right place.”

You push out a sigh. You’ve been trying to do that all morning. “Help me with it?”

“Now?” Sirius’ nose wrinkles. “I was thinking we could break for hot chocolate.”

You suppress a smile. Predictable.

“Come on,” he signs at your reluctance. “You’ve got to be freezing. My treat.”

You laugh. “Help me for a little while, please? Then we can go.”

Sirius rolls his eyes at you, but his expression is fond. “Fine. Let me warm you up first, though.”

He takes your hands again, cupping his around them and raising them to his mouth to blow hot hair into your palms. You smile and let him. The warmth is nearly as nice as the feeling of Sirius’ hands cradling your own, of his lips brushing the sides of your thumbs. You wonder, sometimes, if this is really only an excuse to touch you.

You’ll have to ask him when your hands aren’t so pleasantly occupied.

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adorephina · 3 days ago

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Omg loving this series!! If you decide to continue it I will be devouring each chapter!!!💚💚

Chaperone

Part 1 Part 2

Sirius Black x Fem!Slytherin!reader

2.5k words

cw: smoking, drinking, fluff

You’re laying on the couch with your feet in Regulus’ lap while he reads. You are resting your eyes, but you swear you aren’t falling asleep. There isn’t much going on in the Slytherin Common Room. At least there isn’t until Dorcas is leaning over the back of the couch right above your face. She reaches down and pokes your cheek.

“Go away,” you grumble, turning onto your side.

“You’ve been selected to come to Gryffindor with me!” Dorcas sings excitedly.

“I just went! Take Dory. Take Evan. Take Barty. Avery, Wilkes, Mulicber won’t go… Snape! He won’t need much convincing when you tell him Lily will be there!”

“Ugh. Black, you want to go?” Dorcas asks Regulus, who doesn’t look up from his book. She’s still leaning over the couch.

“Quality time with brother dearest? I’ll pass, Meadowes,” he says, not looking up from his book. His book is resting more firmly on your feet so you know he’s at least listening to your conversation with some interest.

“Which brings me back to you, lovely. Plus, you’ve been requested.”

You roll back onto your back and stare up at her.

“I’ve been requested? Who?”

“The Gryffindors? I don’t know. Marls didn’t specify.”

You glare up at her.

“Come up! Up you get! You’re changing and going!”

She grabs your hands and pulls you into sitting up. You groan.

“Fine… But you owe me.”

Less than fifteen minutes later, you have changed into jeans and a simple black t-shirt and are following Dorcas out of the Slytherin Common Room.

“Why do you still need an escort anyways? I think all of the Gryffindors know you are seeing Marlene,” you ask after a mostly silent walk.

“Less awkward than walking in alone,” she says. “God forbid I try to get our friend groups to mingle.”

You shake your head as Dorcas gives the password to the portrait of the Fat Lady. As she swings open, you are met with music and the smell of alcohol and smoke. You make a face and shoot a glance at Dorcas.

“I think they started without you,” you say.

“Come on,” she replies, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the room.

After a quick stop at the drink table, you head to the group’s usual location, the couches and armchairs by the fire. Marlene jumps up as soon as she sees Dorcas and they melt into each other. You take a seat in an armchair, looking around the room. Thanks to Dorcas dragging you up here a few times, you’re beginning to recognize more of the students not in your year.

“You’re here!” Lily says, spotting you and coming over to lean on your chair.

From the smell of her, she’s had a few drinks already. The party must have started before Dorcas ripped you from your rest on the couch.

“I am,” you say with a smile. “Heard my presence was requested.”

You take a slow sip of your drink. Lily could be quite the talker, especially when she had a few drinks in her to ruin her filter. She slaps a hand onto your thigh.

“Yes! Oh my goodness! You’re the best!” she exclaims. “Pandora’s a bit… loofy? And the boys she’s brought up?” She takes a sip of her own drink and makes a face. “Bad energy. Combined with our boys? Boom. Mess.”

You give her an amused smile and scan where she came from. The Marauders are all talking to each other, but you swear you see James nudge Sirius and look in your direction.

“I can’t imagine Regulus…”

Lily cuts you off. “Sirius’ brother? He’s never come.”

Dorcas leans over to you, Marlene’s arms still very much wrapped around her. “I ask and he always denies.”

You shoot her a look for eavesdropping. Lily’s hand is still on your thigh with a firm grip.

“Marlene,” you say, getting the blonde’s attention, “where’s your cat?”

“Dorm. Too loud!”

You suppress a groan and lean back into your chair. The cat had been part of why you came. If you were going to be in another house’s common room, you wanted, needed something furry to pet you. You clutch your cup with both hands and stare into the drink. Lily mutters something about getting another drink and leaves you to your thoughts. You are certain that Marlene and Dorcas were going to be snogging soon enough, Lily was already well on her way to being drunk and Mary was nowhere to be seen. Everyone you usually spoke with was essentially unavailable. You look over at the boys again. Do you bother seeing if their conversation is tolerable?

You sip on your drink, nursing it for a while. You’re not sure where Lily disappeared to and the lovely couple next to you was snogging, as you had predicted. You find yourself staring at the fire, enjoying how the flames appear to dance to the music playing. It’s enough to make you smile. As you finish your drink, you cast a quick glance toward the boys. Lily had joined them, her arm wrapped around James’ neck and practically falling into his shoulder to keep her balance. You really hope one of the boys has the decency to cut her off, or at least make sure she makes it up to bed at the end of the night.

With a sigh, you set your empty cup on the ground and move to leave the Gryffindor Common Room. Dorcas was still preoccupied with Marlene so you knew she wouldn’t be missing you. It wasn’t like you were deep in conversation with anyone. You were sitting alone by the fire, a lone Slytherin with no real reason to be there. You felt out of place. So you made the logical decision to leave. Pandora or Regulus would still be up and you could keep one of them company. After you close the portrait behind you and you start to walk away, you hear it open and close again.

“Leaving so soon?” Sirius asks.

You shake your head in disbelief, turning around to see him approaching you. You wonder if he had been watching you from the table where he had been sitting. You didn’t want to overthink it or assume anything, but you could’ve sworn you caught him staring at you a few times during class.

“There are better places for me to be right now.”

“Where?”

“I don’t know,” you say with a shrug. “Was gonna go back to my dorm. Doubt Dorcas is missing me.”

“Marls is keeping her company.” Standing next to you now, Sirius throws an arm around your shoulder, causing you to raise your eyebrows at him. “How would you feel about being my chaperone while I get some fresh air, huh? Then you can sod off to wherever after I’m dropped off safe ‘n’ sound right here.”

“What do I get out of it?”

“You won’t have to say you had one measly drink and ditched the party. Sounds pathetic if you ask me.”

“Hmm, too bad no one’s asking, you dog.”

He smiles widely, looking down at you. He was hopeful that you would agree since you hadn’t shrugged his arm off.

“Good thing you’re a dog person then!” he says mirthfully. He steers you in the opposite direction of the Slytherin Dungeon. “Astronomy Tower has the best fresh air.”

“Guess I don’t have a choice in going,” you mutter as you allow yourself to be directed.

“You’re the one not putting up a fight.”

You narrow your eyes at him. “Something tells me you’re into that and I’d be chaperoning you anyways.”

“Something tells me,” he mimics you, “that you wouldn’t let a drunk person…” He stumbles briefly and uses you to stabilize himself. You catch him with a hand on his shoulder and the other on his chest. “Drunk person go to the Astronomy Tower alone,” he finishes.

You both stop walking and look down at your hand on his chest. A faint blush dusts your cheeks as you remove both of your hands, clasping them in front of yourself. Apparently being a good person gets you stuck being people’s babysitter, you think.

Once you reach the last staircase before the top of the Astronomy Tower, Sirius lets go of your shoulder and sprints up the stairs. You roll your eyes as you follow him up at your own pace. You started your evening in the dungeons and now you are going to the highest point of the castle. You were not going to be running. By the time you reach the top, Sirius is already leaning on the railing with a lit cigarette.

“I thought you wanted some fresh air?” you ask, hanging back.

“Air’s the freshest up here,” he says before taking a drag.

“So you decide to pollute it. Got it.”

You cross your arms and lean against the door frame. You didn’t need to be right up next to him to supervise him. You could see how his free hand was gripping his forearm as he leaned over the rail, letting the light breeze blow through his curls. It was moments like this where you saw what just about every girl in Hogwarts saw, the undeniable fact that Sirius was an attractive guy. After almost a minute, Sirius turns around to see where you are.

“What you doing back there? Can’t chaperone very well from there.”

“Can too.”

“But what if,” he says, sliding his legs through the gap between rungs in the railing, “I were to slip?”

Your eyes go wide as his pelvis and torso follow his legs through the gap.

“Shit, shit, shit,” you nearly yell as you sprint toward him, knowing full well that you’d be too late to do anything.

When you reach the railing, he’s laughing as he’s barely hanging onto the bottom rung with both hands. You see he’s also balanced on a ledge that seems to be just his height below the platform.

“You’re a bastard, Black. You know that?” you ask, glaring down at him as your heart pounds in your chest.

“I thought I was a dog,” he replies. “Now help me up, love.”

You hold out your hand and help him climb back up to safety.

“Where’d your cigarette go?”

He laughs again. “You think I can pull that off and hold onto a lit cig? You must think quite highly of me.”

You give him a nasty look, which he just smiles at. He takes out the pack from his pocket and pulls out a fresh one, wasting no time in lighting it. He takes a drag and offers it to you.

“I know you don’t smoke,” he says with cheek.

“Thank you,” you say as you take the cigarette, ignoring his comment.

Now that you were sharing a cigarette with him, you stay at the railing with him. You have to admit to yourself that looking out at the night sky with the light breeze feels nice. Refreshing. Like the cold air had felt from that open window Sirius was smoking at when his friends sent you his way.

Giving you a sideways glance, Sirius asks, “Did you know we have Charms, Potions and Dark Arts together?”

You scrunch your face, not looking at him. “Um, yeah?”

“Really? You knew that?”

“Did you just discover this?” you laugh, making him smile.

“Maybe…” he says almost shyly. “Can’t say I pay attention to everyone in my classes.”

“Hmm, I’m sure you’re paying attention to more important things.”

He hums in agreement. As he leans over the rail, you notice that he’s tapping his knee against one of the lower rungs. Your gut tells you it’s a nervous habit, but you’re not sure what he could be nervous about right now. Maybe he’s concerned a professor will find you up there? That doesn’t seem like it would be enough to set him off. Your punishment would be detention and Sirius wasn’t a stranger to detention.

“So why were you leaving the party?” he asks.

“I was keeping the fireplace company. Parties can be pretty lonely when all your friends are distracted.”

“I could be your distraction,” he says with a smirk.

“Yeah, right,” you say sarcastically, taking the cigarette. After taking a drag, you add, “Even Marlene’s cat wasn’t around. Made sense for me to leave.”

“Thought you were a dog person?”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I can’t like cats. When Hogwarts doesn’t allow dogs except for you, I have to settle for second best.”

“But why settle when the best is right here?”

You turn your head to fully look at him. Was he being serious? Was he flirting with you? You want to laugh at yourself. Of course he was flirting, this is Sirius Black of all people. You take another drag of the cigarette that you still had. After a moment of silence, you hand it back to him.

“I think you’ve had enough fresh air, Black. Let’s get you back.”

You hold out your hand for him to take, but he doesn’t. Instead he throws his arm around your shoulder again. You can tell whatever tipsiness he had coming up here had faded; he’s much more sure in his footsteps. Even his grip on your shoulder feels more sure. As you walk, he pulls out his pack of gum and offers you a piece. You take a piece and pop it into your mouth. The two of you don’t say anything until you reach the portrait. You stop walking a few steps away, causing Sirius’ arm to fall back to his side and him to turn around to look at you with a confused look.

“Aren’t you coming in?”

You raise one of your eyebrows and tilt your head. “Thought you said I could sod off to wherever when I got you back.”

“I mean, yeah, I did,” he says, giving you a half smile and scratching the back of his neck. “Just thought, you know, we were talking and you wouldn’t be keeping the fireplace company. You can hang out with me.”

“Like I said before, Black, your brother is more my speed.”

“Ah, come on, love. Don’t be like that. We can get the room playing a game or something. Spin the bottle, truth or dare, seven min-” he rambles until you put a hand on his shoulder, instantly silencing him.

“Good night, Sirius. Make sure Lily gets to bed okay. She was looking a bit gone earlier.”

Then you turn and head for the dungeons. Your bed was sounding real good right about now. As you walked away, Sirius stared after you. He thought you were leaving because you had no one to talk to you and he had offered a fix to that, so why were you walking away?

---

Regulus is still on the couch where you left him. You pass behind him on your way to your dorm.

“You smell like him again.”

“If he makes a move on me, you’ll be the first one I tell.”

tags: @2dloveshp, @yearninglustfully, @made-for-oliverwood, @ilovejamespottersomuch, @hisparentsgallerryy

Hope y'all enjoyed it <3 Do I make this into a series? A little slowburn, if you will?

#marauders fic #marauders #sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black fluff #adorable #art

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bimrwolf · 1 day ago

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Lines We've Crossed (Part 1)

sirius black x reader words: 9,550 warnings: angst??? kissy kissy ... yearning summary: Navigating friendship with Sirius Black has always been tricky—his teasing smirks, his easy charm, the way he always seems to be there when you need him. But lately, things feel... different. Unspoken feelings and jealous glances start to creep in, fueled by a tense confrontation and a heartache you don’t want to name. Between rainy Hogsmeade weekends, stolen kisses that weren’t meant for you, and sharp words you can’t take back, the bond you’ve shared begins to fray. As the shadow of war grows darker at Hogwarts, so do the emotions tangled between you and Sirius, forcing you to face the one thing you’ve been avoiding: the truth about how you really feel—and whether Sirius might feel the same. a/n: yeah so i said i'd never write HP fanfics.... here we are lol Part 1 | Part 2 (coming soon)

Thunder rolled and rain pelted against the stone of the Hogwarts castle. You sat in the Gryffindor common room, pouting as you stared out the window. It was a Hogsmeade weekend, but no one necessarily wanted to trudge through the cold, wet rain. A book you had neglected lay nestled in your lap, while your now-cold hot chocolate sat untouched beside you.

You tried to tell yourself it didn’t matter. That Rowan Fairfax canceling on you last minute wasn’t worth the way your stomach twisted every time you replayed the conversation in your head. He had been the one to suggest going to Hogsmeade together, even offered to buy you a butterbeer. But when you asked this morning if he wanted to walk there with you, he’d mumbled something about the rain and avoided your gaze entirely.

It wasn’t just disappointment. It was the way he didn’t even say, Maybe another time. It left you with the sinking feeling that he wasn’t interested anymore. Maybe he never had been.

The thought burned more than you wanted to admit.

You rested your chin in your hand, trying to focus on the rain instead of the sharp ache in your chest. Normally, you’d brush something like this off. But today, it lingered, twisting your thoughts into knots. Was it you? Had you done something wrong?

Your spiraling was interrupted by the sound of the portrait hole opening, followed by familiar chuckles. Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter sauntered in, their voices carrying through the room.

“There she is!” Sirius called, his voice breaking through your melancholy. You turned, startled, as he strode toward you with that same boyish grin he always wore, sliding onto the couch beside you and throwing an arm around your shoulders.

The contact made your skin prickle with warmth, but you quickly shoved the feeling aside.

“We were just talking about you,” Sirius added with a teasing smirk.

Despite yourself, you smiled. Sirius had been one of your best friends since second year. His presence was so familiar it felt like a safety net—steady, dependable, constant. But sometimes, especially moments like this, it felt like too much. Like you were hyperaware of him in ways you shouldn’t be.

James leaned against the back of the couch, grinning. “We were wondering why you weren’t with Lily at Hogsmeade.”

Your stomach sank again at the mention of Hogsmeade. You frowned, turning your gaze back to the window. “I didn’t feel like getting wet.”

Sirius tightened his arm around your shoulders in an exaggerated gesture, his tone full of mock disbelief. “You know there are these objects called umbrellas?”

You nudged him playfully, rolling your eyes. “To level with you, it’s not just the rain. I guess I’m not really in the mood.”

The boys exchanged looks, and Peter let out an exaggerated gasp.

“This is one of the last Hogsmeade weekends before the end of term!” Sirius exclaimed, leaning forward to meet your gaze. His pale grey eyes, always so soft when they looked at you, were filled with genuine confusion.

You tried to hold his gaze, but something about it made your chest ache. “I know,” you mumbled, shaking Sirius off of you. As you moved away from him, you ignored the way his expression faltered. “Thank you for thinking of me, but I’m okay. Really.”

They all shrugged. Peter sat down and took out a fresh cauldron cake he must have bought at Honeydukes. You started to analyze them and their clothes. Then their hair. “You four came back from Hogsmeade just now?”

“Yes,” they said.

“Then how are you all so dry? You look like you haven’t stepped outside.” Sure there were drying spells, but you would still be able to tell they had gotten wet.

They all looked at one another again, a silent agreement amongst each other. Their eyes wide in panic, clearly hiding something from you. Sirius looked at James, shrugging, but James shook his head vigorously, that if he said anything he’d be dead.

It was always fascinating to see them communicate without words because James, Remus, and Peter decided to go up to their dorm, leaving you and Sirius alone. You didn’t know if Sirius had won the wordless argument, but he had gotten his way somehow. Sirius quickly changed the subject. “Come on. I’ll go to Hogsmeade with you. Let me buy you a butterbeer.” He had that cheeky grin that he always gave you when he tried to persuade you into doing something. You felt your eyes roll and cheeks heat up at his smirk. You were happy the other boys had left.

“Heard that one before.” You let out a sigh.

“Huh?”

You shook your head, kind of grateful he didn’t know. It saved you from embarrassment. “Doesn’t matter.” You bit your lip, looking over at him. “I told you I don’t feel like walking so far in the rain.”

He smiled again, standing up, holding out his arm for you to take. “Do you trust me?”

You raised a brow, scoffing. “Yes but–”

“Then believe me when I tell you the way we’re going, you will not get a single drop of rain on you.” His smile was ear to ear.

Since first year, Sirius was a mischievous boy. And it never helped that James Potter encouraged the behavior. So it really didn’t surprise you when he showed you the secret passage to Hogsmeade. Sirius made you swear never to tell anyone about it. Ever.

The pair of you snuck out of Honeydukes, holding in laughter as Sirius had snagged a candy bar from the cellar you ended up in.

The two of you ran to the Three Broomsticks under an umbrella. Sirius instructed you to find a seat while he retrieved the beverages, which you happily agreed to. You always loved the warmth of The Three Broomsticks. Secretly, you were happy Sirius offered to come with you because the more you thought about it, you’d regret not going.

You found a table, making your way, smiling wide as you imagined the warm butterscotch. You admired the cozy spot you picked out. You felt better already even when you heard a shrill giggle a few tables over. You looked over, still smiling. You had looked away but looked back, doing a double take. Your face fell.

It was Rowan Fairfax, sitting across from some blonde haired girl you’ve never seen before. Your eyes narrowed and you faced forward, fists clenched. Sirius noticed right away when he appeared with his hands carrying two pints of butterbeer. “Everything okay?” He set your cup in front of you, slightly startled when you grasped it aggressively, taking a large swig, wiping off the foam from your lip. He watched you in bewilderment as your chair scraped against the wooden floor. You stormed up to Rowan, arms crossed.

“Not going to Hogsmeade, I see.” Your voice was cool and laced with tiny daggers.

Rowan’s eyes were wide at the sight of you. He laughed nervously. “Oh… uh… it lightened up so I decided to come. See, I was trying to look for you because I thought maybe you still came but I–”

You smiled sweetly at him, putting your hand up to stop him from talking. “Oh no! I understand, don’t worry.”

“You do?” He asked, shoulders relaxing.

Your smile turned icy as you looked the blonde up and down. “Absolutely! It’s not everyday you find a living thing out of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.” You felt bad, the girl looked nice, but you were fuming with rage.

Rowan snorted, leaning back in his chair. “Funny. Seems like you’re managing just fine.” He glanced at Sirius behind you, who looked confused about what was going on. “I admit the rain wasn’t the reason I didn’t want to go with you. Maybe it’s because your hands are already occupied by someone else.”

You furrowed your brows. “What the hell are you talking about, Fairfax?”

“Please,” he guffawed. “Don’t act obtuse. We both know I’m talking about Black! Everyone believes the two of you are already dating.”

You didn’t expect him to say that. Your face softened but it didn’t stop you from feeling the sting of his words. He gave you a pointed look, smirking. “Or maybe you didn’t notice?” He leaned back looking again where Sirius sat. “You don’t really exactly stop the rumors, do you? Here with him alone and all.”

Through clenched teeth you finally answered, “For your information. We are just friends.” The irritation in your voice was clear. “Everyone knows we’re only friends.”

“Not sure that’s true. Look at you. You didn’t even wait two minutes to drag him here. I guess you kind of enjoy it. Letting him be your bi–”

You had had enough. You took the first thing you saw, which happened to be the blonde’s butterbeer. You dumped the rest of the contents all over Rowan. “What the–” The golden liquid ran down his face, soaking into his hair. The girl gasped, but you caught her hiding a smile behind her hand. The entire pub went silent as Rowan sputtered curses at you.

You didn’t look at Sirius. You couldn’t. The only option you had was to storm out.

The cool rain drops burned as it fell on your skin.You had your arms crossed against your chest, looking down at the ground. There goes not getting wet.

It wasn’t long until you heard Sirius calling out your name, his voice was faint at first. He had always been a fast runner, quickly catching up to you. He was breathless but he had gently grabbed your elbow so you’d turn around. He had the umbrella sticking out, letting it shield you from the rain.

He didn’t know what to say, you could tell. He gave you a small smile. “I promised you wouldn’t get wet…” He tried to joke but he frowned when your jaw ticked. “Listen, I don’t know what Rowan Fairfax said to you but… he’s always kind of been a pompous thickheaded toad.”

He was only trying to help you feel better but in some way, he was making it worse. Your anger was bubbling again. Your eyes were locked on the ground. The storm inside you was wild as ever.

“Sirius, I don’t need you to come to my rescue. Not now. Not ever.” You tried to keep your voice steady, and you achieved that by not looking him in the eye.

He blinked, clearly confused. He looked unsure what to say. “I’m not trying to. I was only making sure you were okay…”

Your frustration rolled out of you like thunder. “Why do you even care, Sirius?” You narrowed your eyes at him. “We’re not even a couple. You and me. Right?”

He took a step back. “Of course we’re not. I never said we were. But it doesn’t stop me from caring about you.”

“Oh sure,” you interrupted him. Your voice was sharp. “Have you ever thought about how many boyfriends I’ve had in all my years at Hogwarts?”

“What does that have to do–”

“Just answer my question! How many?” You asked, your heart was pounding against your chest.

He opened his mouth to answer, but quickly closed it. Your lip quivered, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Exactly. None. Not even one. Because apparently, anyone who has ever been interested in me backs off. You know why? Because of you, Sirius. Everyone assumes we’re more than just friends.” You couldn’t help but laugh. “Isn’t that ridiculous?”

You ignored how Sirius’ face dropped slightly at the last comment. “I never meant… I didn’t know.”

You wiped your face. You weren’t sure what was rain or tears anyway. “I just want to be left alone, Sirius. Let’s just only associate with one another when we’re in big groups, okay? No more of… everything.”

Sirius completely backed away from you. His jaw clenched. He didn’t say anything else to you as he turned back around to head into Hogsmeade. You were certain he was going to the secret entrance, possibly to get back to the castle sooner. You let out a shaky cry once he was gone from view, feeling more alone than ever. Something ached in your chest, like lightning cracking in your lungs. The storm didn’t feel like it was over.

***

It wasn’t long for the group to feel the tension between you and Sirius. They quickly caught on to the way neither of you looked at each other anymore, how you never spoke directly to him, and how, most of all, Sirius wasn’t all over you. The absence of his usual teasing, his arm slung casually around your shoulders, or even the occasional stolen laugh between you—it was glaring.

They didn’t question it, but it was obvious.

It was the week of the Quidditch Final, and Gryffindor was up against Slytherin. The energy in the Great Hall was palpable, students buzzing with excitement. You, on the other hand, stared listlessly at your plate, poking at your eggs as you sat with Lily far from the boys. You knew they were at their usual spot, probably going on about strategies or Quidditch plays.

Lily was smiling softly, her eyes drifting toward James as she talked about how she had never noticed how fit he was.

You smirked, half-listening, watching the way her green eyes kept sneaking glances across the hall. “Can’t believe you finally caved,” you teased lightly.

“What do you mean?” she asked, her tone far too innocent as she blinked up at you.

“Please.” You gave her a knowing look. “You definitely fancy James Potter after all these years rejecting him.”

Her cheeks flushed a deep red, and she ducked her head, rubbing at her temple. “I do not... I mean...” She sighed, burying her face in her hands. “He’s not all that bad now. He’s less arrogant, and I don’t know... oh god, what am I going to do?”

You chuckled quietly at her melodrama. “Suppose you’re going to the game then?” you asked, trying to keep the tone light.

“If it means watching Slytherin officially lose the House Cup, then yes,” she said, her gaze flicking across the hall to where Severus Snape sat, his expression sour as always.

Normally, Lily was the first to roll her eyes at the Gryffindor-Slytherin rivalry. But ever since last year—since Snape had called her that name—it felt like something fundamental had shifted in her. You could see it in the way she carried herself, the way her words were just a bit sharper when Slytherins were involved.

You sighed, glancing toward Sirius almost reflexively, even though you told yourself not to. He was on the other side of the hall, a boisterous ringleader as always, getting most of the Gryffindors to join in a chant encouraging James.

Lily smiled at the scene, clearly charmed by the way James tried to hide his embarrassment. Sirius, on the other hand, was utterly shameless, leaping onto the table with Peter and Remus, their arms slung around each other as they swayed to the beat of their own chant.

You couldn’t help but notice the way James’ face lit up when he caught Lily’s gaze. His grin softened into something more vulnerable, more genuine. And Lily, for all her teasing and denial, smiled back, her green eyes gleaming with a happiness you hadn’t seen in her for a while.

You realized, in that moment, that their relationship had shifted. And it would change everything.

You weren’t sure why that realization sat so heavily in your chest. Was it because you envied how easy it seemed for them now? Or was it the fear that everyone was moving forward while you felt stuck?

Your jaw clenched as your gaze fell on Sirius. He was still on the table, completely oblivious to the scolding look Professor McGonagall was shooting his way. He didn’t seem to care. He never did.

And yet, even as McGonagall reprimanded him and took points from Gryffindor, Sirius showed no reaction. He didn’t flinch, didn’t argue, didn’t flash the defiant smirk you’d come to expect from him. He just climbed down, brushing it off like it didn’t matter.

But what frustrated you most wasn’t his reaction—or lack thereof. It was the way he didn’t look at you. His eyes didn’t meet yours across the hall. There was no shared smile, no playful glint.

Instead, he laughed along with James and Remus as if nothing had changed.

Your blood simmered, the boil low and slow, until you realized your fists had clenched under the table. Why does it bother me so much?

You told yourself it was because he wasn’t the same Sirius anymore. He wasn’t your Sirius—the boy who had been your best friend, your anchor. The boy who used to make you feel seen.

It infuriated you because you didn’t even know why it hurt.

Without thinking, you stood up abruptly.

Lily jumped at the sudden movement, startled. “What are you doing?”

You opened your mouth, trying to find an excuse, but nothing came. Instead, you pressed your lips together, the words caught in your throat. “Save me a seat at the game, will you?” you mumbled, your voice tight as you grabbed your bag and scurried off before she could ask more questions.

As you left the hall, your thoughts churned like a storm.

You didn’t want to admit the truth—not even to yourself—but the ache in your chest wasn’t just frustration. It was jealousy, tangled up with hurt and longing in a way that made you feel exposed. Vulnerable.

And it was all because of Sirius.

***

You hadn’t realized Gryffindor had won. The entire game your eyes were glued to Peter who sat by Remus who sat by Sirius who had his arm around a fifth year Hufflepuff, Piper. Your chest felt as if it was collapsing. Your fists were clenched and you were certain if you turned your palms up, indents from your nails would be tattooed into your skin.

Everytime a chaser from Gryffindor scored. But when James was the one to score, his friends would stand up and cheer. Piper would also stand, clapping her hands, a shrill cheer came out of her.

The cheers of the crowd swelled around you, Gryffindor red and gold blurring into a sea of celebration. But none of it reached you. Your focus remained fixed, not on the players darting through the air or the roar of James Potter's spectacular goal, but on Sirius.

He was perched in the stands, his arm slung casually over Piper, his easy smile pulling a laugh from her lips. You hated the sound of it. Hated how easily he could charm her—or anyone, really. Sirius Black, the boy who could make friends with a stone if he tried hard enough, was just there, as he always was, and yet, it felt unbearable.

You told yourself you were being ridiculous. Why should it matter? You were upset about the tension between you, about the argument you’d had weeks ago. That’s all it was. Right? That was the reason your chest tightened every time Piper leaned into him, her blonde hair brushing against his shoulder, her laugh echoing in your ears like a mocking taunt.

But when his gaze flicked over to you, just for a moment, and his lips quirked in that familiar sheepish smile—the one that had always felt like it was meant for you alone—your breath caught. It was as if the world had paused, the noise of the match fading into the background. Your stomach twisted, a strange fizzing sensation spreading through you, warm and dizzying and utterly unshakable.

And that’s when it hit you.

You liked Sirius.

No—liked wasn’t strong enough. You cared for him in a way you hadn’t fully allowed yourself to understand before. It was the way your heart raced when he smiled, the way you felt seen when he met your eyes, the way you always seemed to gravitate toward him, even when you were angry.

It was why the sight of his arm around Piper burned like a brand, why your chest ached with a mix of longing and bitterness. You wanted to be the one sitting there, the one making him laugh. You wanted him to hold you the way he was holding her.

Your stomach dropped at the realization. You had been so careful to keep him at arm’s length, to shove those feelings into a corner of your mind and lock them away. But seeing him now, so carefree and entirely out of reach, made it impossible to deny.

The game continued in a blur after that, James scoring again and again, the Gryffindor stands erupting with joy. Lily jumped to her feet beside you, her cheers sharp and triumphant as she hurled taunts at the Slytherin team. Sirius, catching on, shouted something equally bold in her direction. “Hell yeah, Evans!” And she grinned back at him.

You forced a smile, even as your chest tightened. His pale eyes darted to you, his smile softening, like he was testing the waters between you. For a fleeting second, it felt like old times—before the fight, before the distance. But just as quickly as the moment came, it vanished, replaced by Piper’s giggle as she leaned closer to whisper in his ear.

Your heart sank, your fists clenching in your lap. The truth was undeniable now, sharp and unwelcome, but there it was: you liked Sirius Black. And he was sitting beside someone else, grinning as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

You turned your attention back to the game, blinking away the stinging in your eyes as Gryffindor clinched the victory. Around you, your housemates erupted into cheers, Lily throwing her arms around you in excitement. But even as you hugged her back, the ache in your chest refused to subside.

Everyone waited for the team back in the common room which had been decorated in celebration. Lily waited anxiously, hands fidgeting, peering over the crowd of people as the portrait swung open. As if on cue, Peter, Remus, and Sirius appeared with a crate full of butterbeers and sweet snacks.

Sirius handed you a butterbeer, hands momentarily grazing when you took it… apprehensively. The look he gave you made you swallow the shared secret of how they even acquired a crate full of treats from Honeydukes. No one else knew. And you were sure you weren’t supposed to, but Sirius had trusted you.

A pang of guilt washed over you.

He smiled, teeth sparkling out the corner of his mouth. Maybe you two should talk? As soon as the thought crossed your mind, he had already left you, making his way handing out more butterbeers around the room.

You chugged the glass bottle down, “Are you going to drink yours?” You pointed to Lily’s glass.

She broke from her daze, staring at James across the room. She looked at the bottle in her hand, shaking her head and giving it to you. Her brows furrowed, concerned how quickly you drank her bottle too, wiping the fizz from your lips with the back of your hand. “Okay, what is going on with you?”

You looked away, trying not to give away that your mind was occupied with confusing thoughts that you hadn’t figured out yourself. so you lied. “I feel like exams are looming over us.”

Lily‘s eyes narrowed, scanning you up and down as if she wasn’t entirely convinced. “You do great in all your classes.”

You hummed. You noticed her attention flickered back over to James. “Are you going to ogle him the entire night or are you going to go talk to him?”

She frowned and you laughed at her reaction. “Will you just slow down on the butterbeers.” She commented after you had convinced Peter to give you another one. Her hand gently placed on the bottle. “You’ll outdrink the entire team.”

You waved her off, your cheeks flushing from more than just the warmth of the butterbeer. “It’s a celebration, isn’t it?”

She chuckled, removing her hand. “Fine, but only because I’m hoping you loosen up a little.”

“Loosen up?” you repeated, slightly offended, but she only smirked and gave you a pointed look.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed. It has nothing to do with exams,” she said, leaning closer. “You and Sirius… something’s been off for weeks. Care to explain?”

You froze, your hand gripping the neck of your second butterbeer. “There’s nothing to explain,” you muttered, avoiding her gaze.

“Oh, please,” Lily scoffed, crossing her arms. “I’ve seen the way you two look at each other when you think no one’s watching.”

Your jaw ticked, avoiding her gaze, bringing the bottle to your lips. Your eyes flicked to Sirius laughing, throwing his arm around James as they cheered. You could hear him telling the crowd a play by play of James. Your lips betrayed you, lifting into a small smile. Your stomach twisted when his gaze landed on you, returning the smile but it looked a little sad. Maybe you should talk to him.

“Lovesick,” Lily nudged you.

“Lily!” you hissed, glancing around to ensure no one overheard.

“Well, am I wrong?” she pressed, arching a perfectly manicured brow.

You sighed, rubbing your temples. “It’s complicated. We had a… disagreement, that’s all. He’s just a friend. End of story.” Liar.

Lily didn’t look convinced. “If you say so,” she said lightly, but the knowing glint in her eye remained. She glanced across the room at Sirius, who was animatedly recounting something to James and Remus, his voice carrying over the buzz of the party. For a moment, her gaze softened, and you could tell she wanted to say more.

But she didn’t and eventually, she caved. Her and James had found themselves on a loveseat. His arm draped over the back, listening to her talk. You on the other hand, had managed to acquire more butterbeers. You weren’t drunk. You felt lighter. That’s what you told Peter who caught you when you tripped on a corner of a table. “Do… you know where Sirius is? I need to have a few words with him.” You stood tall, attempting to make a serious face.

He looked around. “I’m not sure. He said he was going to get more snacks but that was ages ago.” He frowned, putting a hand on his stomach. “I was looking forward to some Cherry Tarts. I’ll let him know you’re looking for him!” Peter smiled bright at you.

You couldn’t help but look disappointed. “It’s alright. I think I’m going to go out and get some fresh air.”

He gave you a knowing look, patting you on the shoulder. As you weaved through the crowds you wondered if he saw right through you. It was impossible, you didn’t even know what there was to see.

Someone grabbed your arm as you approached the portrait. The grasp wasn’t tight, but firm enough for you to stop in your tracks. Remus towered over you, his face shadowed with forewarning. “Why don’t you go to bed?” His voice was soft, mixed with something else you couldn’t place your finger on.

“Why? It’s not that late.” You laughed. It was a lie. It was really late. Professor McGonagall would soon make an appearance to shut the festivities down. Or maybe she wouldn’t because Gryffindor had won the House Cup and the term would be over soon.

He took in a sharp breath. “You look… will you just go to bed?”

You pulled away from him. “I already told Peter, I’m not drunk. Okay, yes I had a few butterbeers but I’m not going to fall down the stairs or anything of that sort. I only want to feel the night breeze on my face.”

Something was on the tip of his tongue, his lips parted but it stayed stuck there. He was hiding something. Which meant your curiosity was much more important than his concern for your wellbeing. You opened the portrait, not giving him another look as you left the tower. You had expected there to be something dangerous on the other side from his foreboding tone but nothing of the sort was lingering around.

You strolled past different paintings, most of them asleep. You always loved the castle at night. You weren’t exactly allowed to be wandering the halls, but you weren’t planning to go far from the common room. You found a spot, a ledge of the castle where you could see the night sky. You sighed, leaning against the cool stone ledge, willing the breeze to clear your thoughts. It wasn’t as if Sirius hadn’t always been like this—charming, magnetic, always surrounded by people who gravitated toward him like moths to a flame. You had spent years watching it, laughing it off. So why now? Why did it feel like something sharp was wedged under your ribs every time Piper giggled at something he said?

Shaking your head, you pushed off the ledge and wandered back toward the common room, your footsteps echoing softly in the quiet corridor. But as you rounded a corner, you froze. There they were, just ahead—Sirius and Piper.

Your first instinct was to turn back, but something stopped you. Maybe it was the way Piper leaned into him, her voice hushed and sweet as she whispered something in his ear. Maybe it was the way he smiled back at her, that easy, natural smile that used to feel like it was yours.

And then, before you could look away, Sirius tilted his head, his hands cradling her face as he kissed her.

The sight hit you like a Bludger to the chest, knocking the air from your lungs. You stood frozen, your heart racing, as a mix of emotions crashed over you. Jealousy, sharp and biting, surged to the surface, followed by an ugly wave of self-doubt. Why her?

Your eyes lingered on the way his fingers tangled gently in her hair, the way her hands gripped his arms as though he was hers to hold. He looked so... confident, so sure of himself. So completely comfortable in a way that made your stomach churn.

Had he ever thought about kissing you like that? The thought burned, and you hated yourself for letting it linger. But as you stood there, unable to tear your gaze away, you couldn’t stop your mind from spiraling.

What does she have that I don’t? She was pretty, of course. A Hufflepuff—bright and cheerful and bubbly in a way that made her impossible not to like. But it wasn’t just that. There was something effortless about her, something easy. She fit into Sirius’ world in a way you never seemed to.

You bit your lip, your fists clenching at your sides. You could feel the sting of tears threatening to brim, but you refused to let them fall. Instead, anger bubbled up, hot and unrelenting. You were angry at him for doing this—angry at her for being the one in his arms—and most of all, angry at yourself for caring so much.

I shouldn’t feel this way, you told yourself. He doesn’t even know. Doesn’t care. Why would he? Perhaps that’s why you were irritated that Rowan mentioned no guy wanted to be with you because of Sirius. No guy wanted to be with you, not even Sirius. You were undesirable.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the faint sound of a giggle, and it twisted the knife deeper. Sirius leaned closer, his lips brushing against hers again, and you suddenly couldn’t take it anymore.

You needed to leave. To put as much distance as possible between yourself and this scene.

But as you turned, you collided with something solid. Peeves.

“Peeper!” the poltergeist cackled gleefully, his voice loud enough to echo down the corridor. You stumbled back, wide-eyed, your cover blown.

Sirius and Piper broke apart instantly, both turning toward the noise. Piper flushed, quickly adjusting her jumper, her embarrassment clear. But Sirius’ reaction was different. His jaw tightened, his expression hardening as his storm-grey eyes locked onto yours.

You stood there for a moment, rooted to the spot, your emotions a mess of humiliation, anger, and something far too raw to name.

“Brilliant,” you muttered under your breath, cursing Peeves as you spun on your heel and stormed back toward the common room. Your footsteps were quick and loud against the stone floor, but they didn’t drown out the sound of Sirius calling your name.

You approached the portrait, clenching your eyes tight as you tried to remember what the password was.

Tears brimmed the corner of your eyes, burning as you attempted not to let them fall. “Pickle Goblin,” you croaked. The portrait swung open.

The party had fizzled out. James and Lily were still talking. Remus was on the other side of the room, reading. Peter must have already gone to bed. You stormed inside, ignoring a cheerful greeting from Lily.

Remus quickly stood up, saying your name sympathetically.

“Not now,” you choked. The portrait swung open, Sirius’s eyes wide. His hair was disheveled and the little hope you had wanted to believe it was from running after you. He was out of breath, but managed to call your name. You stopped at the door that led to your dormitory.

Bystanders quickly scurried off to their own dormitories, only leaving you, Sirius, and your friends. You turned around, placing a pretend smile on your face. “Yes?”

He swallowed, looking over at James, begging for help. “Are we okay?”

You tilted your head, the smile on your face never reaching your eyes. “Are we okay?” You repeated the words to yourself, looking around the room as if the answer was floating in the air. Your voice was strained and dripped with incredulity.

He didn’t flinch. His gaze held yours but you saw the flicker of regret. Or perhaps it was frustration, you couldn’t tell. “I mean…” he started, running a hand through his hair. “I just want to fix this. Whatever this is.”

Lily started to approach you, but you held a hand up, stopping her. “Fix this? Do you even know what this is? You can’t even say it.”

James shifted awkwardly, tugging Lily back gently by her wrist. "Maybe we should —" he began, but Sirius shot him a look that made him stop mid-sentence.

"Of course I know," Sirius said, his voice lower now, almost pleading. "You stopped talking to me. You-"

Your laugh interrupted him. Remus had stood up this time, saying your name in a warning tone. “Stopped talking to you? Sirius I only told you the truth and you refused to listen to me. I told you we couldn’t do this anymore. We couldn’t do this anymore.”

“What does that even mean?” His voice got louder. He was frustrated.

“Exactly! Don’t you see, Sirius. We’ve always been a this. Always close friends who were always together. Always a little too close always giving each other looks that we only know. But never a this that is anything more. And because of that, no one has or will ever see me as anything but your shadow. Not Rowan, not Piper, not even you. Maybe they’re all right. Maybe that’s all I am. In fact, I think you like it because you know that I will do all of those things with no benefits. ” You broke, and your voice quivered.

Your words hung in the air, suffocating and bitter.

His face shifted and the confusion left. It was unreadable but you noticed the birthmark above his left eyebrow, knowing it only appeared when he was angry. He answered quietly, “That’s not fair.”

"Fair?" you repeated, letting out a humorless laugh. "Fair? You think this is about fairness, Sirius? It's about the fact that you're out there snogging Piper while I'm-while I'm-" You stopped yourself, realizing what you were about to admit, and shook your head violently. "You know what? It doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters!" Sirius stepped closer, but you took a step back, your heart pounding.

"No, it doesn't," you said firmly, your voice dropping to a whisper. "Because nothing is going to change. You'll keep being you, and I'll keep being the person no one looks at twice. So, no, Sirius. We are not okay."

For a moment, he just stared at you, his lips pressing into a thin line as if he was holding back a thousand things he wanted to say.

But whatever they were, they never came.

You turned on your heel, your shoulders trembling as you climbed the stairs to your dormitory. You heard James mutter something under his breath, followed by Sirius letting out a frustrated growl.

But you didn't turn around. You didn't look back.

When you finally reached your bed, you collapsed onto it, letting the tears fall freely now.

Somewhere deep down, you had wanted him to fight harder. To say something, anything, that might have made this hurt less. But he didn't.

***

Much like you expected, end of year exams were dreadful. Time dragged on. Nothing was happening except the alarm that the dark wizard, Voldermort was apparently getting stronger and his army was growing little by little.

There were hushed whispers and rumors that there were Hogwarts students that held allegiance to him. Most of them were Slytherins.

You hadn’t really had time to even notice the lingering ache of unspoken words whenever you would see Sirius. The tension between you was thick, and if it weren’t for exams, you’d probably drown in it, smothered to death.

It was easier to busy yourself with studying and homework. You would spend hours in the library, mountains of scrolls for each of your classes.

Yet, Sirius still found a way to creep into your thoughts. He was unshakeable. It irritated you. Your absentminded tapping against a table forced Lily to stop studying with you.

It was late in the evening when you made your way from the library. You yawned, grateful tomorrow was your last day of exams. The hallways were quiet, and your footsteps echoed, bouncing off the stone wall. You had passed a few ghosts, mumbling about “They’re arguing again.”

You thought it was weird. Anyone could be arguing but when you turned a corner, you stopped in your tracks. Low, heated voices caught your attention. Two figures were arguing near a tapestry. Sirius and his brother Regulus.

Regulus looked much like his brother, dark hair, cool eyes. His robes were adorned in Slytherin green.

Regulus stood rigid. Face stone cold.

Sirius looked like a storm, hair disheveled, hands gesturing wildly as he spoke. ”I’m not returning and it’s final.” Sirius had run away from home in the middle of the summer holiday, before the school term began. You never saw Regulus and Sirius talk much since then. Only pointed looks full of disappointment from both brothers.

Regulus crossed his arms. “Because you’re a coward. You’d rather be running around with your pack of strays. You ran away from your family and your responsibilities–”

“My responsibilities?” Sirius cut in, his voice rising with incredulity. “You mean their leash, their expectations. Their madness. I’m not going to waste my life playing puppet to a cause I despise.” The venom in his tone startled you, even though you’d heard him speak of his family with bitterness before. This was different. It was rawer. More desperate.

Regulus’ face didn’t falter, but his hands clenched at his sides. “You think you’re better than us? That leaving makes you noble?”

“No,” Sirius said, his voice quieter now but no less cutting. “But at least I can live with myself.”

Regulus flinched, his composure slipping for a moment before his expression hardened again. “You’ll regret this, Sirius. You’ll see how wrong you are.”

With that, he turned on his heel and disappeared into the shadows of the corridor, leaving Sirius alone.

For a moment, you considered leaving before Sirius noticed you. This was personal, a side of him he hadn’t chosen to share with you. But before you could slip away, he turned, his storm-grey eyes meeting yours. The air between you felt electric, charged with emotions you couldn’t quite name.

“How much did you hear?” he asked, his tone clipped, the sharpness in his voice not quite masking the exhaustion in his eyes.

You hesitated, unsure if honesty was the right move. “Enough,” you admitted softly. “Sirius—”

“Don’t,” he said, cutting you off as he ran a hand through his hair, his frustration palpable. “Just... don’t. I’m fine.”

The lie was glaringly obvious, but his tone left little room for argument. Your chest tightened as you watched him, wanting to reach out, to tell him he didn’t have to go through this alone. But the wall he’d put up between you was unyielding, brick by stubborn brick.

“Are you sure you’re—”

“I said I’m fine,” he snapped, his voice sharp and cutting. His grey eyes met yours, but they weren’t soft or kind like they used to be—they were cold, stormy. “Why do you even care, anyway? I thought we weren’t even friends.”

The words hit you like a hex, stealing the breath from your lungs. You blinked, stunned, as the sting of his dismissal sank in.

“That’s not fair, Sirius,” you said softly, your voice trembling despite your best efforts.

“Fair?” he repeated with a bitter laugh, his hands clenching into fists at his sides. “You made it clear, didn’t you? You don’t want anything to do with me. So why start pretending to care now?”

You felt heat rise in your cheeks, anger and hurt warring inside you. “You don’t mean that.”

“Don’t I?” he shot back, his voice cracking slightly before he turned away, running a hand through his hair again. “Just... leave it, alright?”

The sharpness of his words sliced through you, leaving you frozen in place as he strode down the corridor, his footsteps echoing in the silence. You stood there, alone and hollow, as the ache in your chest grew heavier, threatening to swallow you whole.

You couldn’t sleep. The dormitory had settled into a quiet hum of steady breathing but you lay awake, staring at the canopy above your bed. Lily had noticed you were upset, but you shrugged her off, pretending to fall asleep before everyone else.

You tried to tell yourself it wasn’t your place to worry. He didn’t want your help and pushing him would only make him more distant than he already was. It wasn’t that you wanted to stop being friends with him. You guess you just had realized you didn’t know how to be friends with him after learning your friendship was the reason boys didn’t want to date you.

None of your racing thoughts stopped the gnawing worry, watching him argue with his brother, who you knew he was once close to.

Finally, unable to take the stillness of your bed any longer, you slipped out from under the covers and padded down to the common room. You knew someone had the same idea when you saw the fire, low but still glowing, casting flickering shadows across the space.

Your heart skipped a beat when you recognized that person to be Sirius. He sat on the sofa facing the fire, his head resting against the back, his gaze fixed on the dying embers. His hair looked tousled, hanging over the edge. You considered turning back, afraid he might snap at you again. But something in the slump of his shoulders stopped you.

You didn’t say anything, but you walked into view, offering him a half-hearted smile. His eyes, though tired, didn’t hold the same sharpness as before. His face softened, gesturing wordlessly to the spot next to him. You approached cautiously, sinking into the seat.

The silence and tension pressed down on your chest, trying to decide what to say.

“I shouldn’t have been harsh,” he said finally, his voice rough and low.

You shook your head, your throat tight. “It’s okay. I was just worried.”

He gave you a small smile, making you feel that weird fizz in you again. “I never told you why I ran away from home. Did I?”

You shook your head.

He let out a humorless laugh, looking back at the fire. For a long moment, he didn’t respond. He fixed his gaze back to you, eyes heavy with a pain you couldn’t describe. “She wanted me to take the Mark.”

“What?” The air left your lungs in a rush, but your brows furrowed, somewhat hoping it wasn’t what you thought he meant.

His lips pursed. “My mother,” he answered, his tone bitter. “She wanted me to bear the Dark Mark. Pledge my allegiance to V… the Dark Lord. Said it was my duty.” He paused, his hands clenching to fists. “That’s why I left. I didn’t even pack. I left everything. I didn’t even say goodbye to Reg and I know a part of him hates that I didn’t. But if I had… I don’t think I would’ve gone through with it.”

He rubbed his face, sighing. “And now my biggest fear is playing out. Regulus is beginning to truly believe the lies of my family. I’m sure it’s my mothers doing.”

Your heart twisted. “Sirius…” You placed your hand on his. He tensed for a second, and you felt guilty of the weeks you hadn’t been around him that even your touch was foreign to him. He glanced at your hand on his, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. For a moment, he looked like he might pull away, but then his shoulders sagged, and he let out a shaky breath.

“I don’t know what to do,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “Regulus... he’s my brother. And I hate what he’s becoming, but at the same time, I can’t blame him. Not entirely. He’s just... he’s stuck. Just like I was.”

Your heart clenched at the vulnerability in his voice. This wasn’t the Sirius who was loud and brash, always ready with a witty comeback or a rebellious grin. This was Sirius stripped bare, raw and aching, and it broke something inside you to see him like this.

“He’s not you, Sirius,” you said softly, your hand still resting on his. “He’s still young. He still has time to see the truth.”

Sirius shook his head, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. “You’re too optimistic for your own good, you know that?” He leaned into you playfully. Another beat went by, and the sadness returned into his eyes. “I don’t regret my choice to leave. But I miss him,” he admitted quietly. “And I hate that I do.”

You swallowed hard, trying to choose your words carefully. “He’s still your brother, Sirius. That doesn’t just go away.”

His lips quirked into the faintest hint of a smile, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “You always know what to say, don’t you?”

You smiled softly, the tension between you easing just slightly. For a while, neither of you spoke, the crackling of the fire filling the silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable, though. It felt... safe. Familiar.

“I miss you,” Sirius said quietly after a while, his gaze fixed on the flames.

You felt the heat in your cheeks rise and that heavy feeling be placed on your chest again. You swallowed hard. “I miss you too.”

His eyes flicked back to yours, and for a moment, the world seemed to shrink, leaving only the two of you. There was something unspoken in his gaze, something that made your heart race and your stomach twist with nerves. You looked away, your cheeks warming under his scrutiny.

As you sat beside Sirius in the dim glow of the fire, the tension between you seemed to melt into the warmth of the common room. Yet, the knot in your chest remained, twisting with every word, every glance he threw your way.

The air between you felt fragile, as though any sudden movement might shatter the moment. You tried to focus on the flicker of the flames, but your thoughts were a mess of questions you didn’t dare ask. What did all of this mean? For you? For him? For the strange push and pull that had lingered between you for so long?

Sirius shifted slightly, his shoulder brushing yours. It was such a small thing, but it sent a jolt through you, and you suddenly realized how aware you were of him—of his presence, his scent, the way his voice softened when he spoke to you.

Why is this happening now? you wondered, stealing a glance at him. He looked tired, his face shadowed with an exhaustion that went far deeper than the physical. His confession about the Dark Mark, about his family and Regulus, had cracked something open in you—a deep well of empathy and something else. Something warmer. Something you weren’t sure you wanted to name.

You studied his profile, the sharp line of his jaw, the way his hair fell messily across his face. He was beautiful. He always had been, but now, in this quiet moment, the thought struck you differently. There was something vulnerable about him tonight, something that made your chest ache.

What if you lose him again? The thought whispered through your mind, unbidden and unwelcome. The weeks of tension between you had been suffocating, but this... this felt like a fragile lifeline. You didn’t want to let it slip through your fingers.

Your gaze dropped to his hands, resting loosely on his knees. You thought about all the times those hands had brushed yours—accidentally or intentionally—how they’d tugged you along on one of his harebrained adventures or steadied you when you’d nearly fallen on the Quidditch pitch.

And now, as you sat here together, a thought crept into your mind. A thought you’d pushed aside countless times before, too afraid to confront it. What would it feel like to hold his hand and not let go? To know what it’s like to kiss him? Your cheeks flushed at the thought, and you quickly looked away, scolding yourself. Don’t be ridiculous. He was your best friend—or had been, before everything went sideways. This wasn’t the time for romantic fantasies, not when he was baring his soul to you.

But the thought wouldn’t leave. It settled in your chest, insistent and impossible to ignore. You had spent years brushing off the idea, convincing yourself it was nothing. A fleeting crush. A side effect of being so close. But now, in the stillness of the common room, you couldn’t shake the feeling that it was more than that.

“Sirius,” you said suddenly, the sound of your own voice startling you.

He turned to you, his brows lifting slightly. “Yeah?”

You hesitated, your heart hammering in your chest. Don’t do this. Don’t make it weird. He’s already had a terrible night.

But then his eyes met yours, and for a moment, you swore the world stood still. There was something in the way he looked at you, something that made your breath catch.

“Sirius,” you began again, your voice softer now, “have you ever thought about kissing me?”

The words hung in the air, and the moment they left your lips, your stomach flipped with a mix of dread and anticipation. You braced yourself for his reaction, for the laugh or the scoff or—worst of all—the rejection. But none of those things came.

Instead, he stared at you, his eyes wide and searching. “What?” he asked, his voice cracking slightly.

You laughed nervously, shaking your head as if you could erase the question. “Never mind,” you said quickly. “That was a stupid thing to say.”

You swallowed hard, your pulse roaring in your ears. “I don’t know,” you admitted, though it wasn’t entirely true. “It’s just... I don’t want to go into seventh year never having been kissed. And... I trust you.”

His eyes softened at that, his surprise giving way to something warmer. “You trust me?” he repeated, his voice quieter now.

“Yes,” you said firmly, meeting his gaze. “I trust you more than anyone.”

He stared at you for a long moment, the firelight flickering in his eyes. You could see the hesitation in his expression, the way he was weighing his words. And for a moment, you wondered if you’d made a mistake. But then he let out a breath, his lips twitching into a small, uncertain smile.

“You really know how to put a bloke on the spot, don’t you?” he said, his tone lighter now, though his voice was still tinged with something deeper.

You couldn’t help but smile, though your heart was still racing. “So... would you?”

He tilted his head slightly, studying you as if he were trying to figure out if you were serious. “Are you sure about this?” he asked finally, his voice barely above a whisper.

You nodded, your throat tight. “I’m sure.”

Sirius hesitated, his eyes locked on yours, searching for any sign that you might change your mind. When he leaned in, it was slow, cautious, like he was giving you every chance to pull away. His hand brushed against your cheek, tentative and warm, as his lips met yours in a soft, chaste kiss.

It was simple, just the barest press of lips, but it sent a shiver through you nonetheless. His touch was surprisingly gentle, like he was afraid you might break. When he pulled back, he lingered close, his breath brushing against your skin.

“There,” he murmured, his voice low and almost teasing, though his tone lacked its usual confidence. “First kiss accomplished.”

You opened your eyes, meeting his gaze. Something unspoken lingered in the air between you, the warmth of his hand still ghosting on your cheek. The kiss had been sweet, careful... but it hadn’t been enough. Not for you.

“Sirius,” you said softly, reaching for his wrist before he could move away completely. He froze, his grey eyes wide and questioning as you tugged him closer again. “Wait.”

“What is it?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.

You didn’t answer. Instead, you leaned in, pressing your lips to his for the second time. This time, the kiss wasn’t cautious or hesitant. It was fuller, deeper, and it carried all the emotions you hadn’t been able to put into words.

For a moment, Sirius seemed startled, but then he responded, his hand sliding to the back of your neck as he kissed you back with more certainty. His other hand moved to your waist, fingers splaying lightly against the fabric of your jumper. You felt his thumb brush a slow circle there, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine.

You tilted your head slightly, letting the kiss deepen, your fingers tangling in the fabric of his shirt as you pulled him closer. His lips were warm, soft but insistent, moving against yours in a rhythm that made your heart race. There was something intoxicating about the way he kissed—like he was pouring every ounce of himself into it, like he couldn’t get enough.

Your breaths grew uneven, mingling between you as the kiss intensified. Sirius’ fingers tightened slightly at your waist, and you felt the faint scrape of his teeth against your lower lip as he deepened the angle. It was perfect—messy, electric, and far more than you had expected.

And then, just as suddenly, Sirius pulled back, his forehead resting against yours as he broke the kiss. His breathing was unsteady, his chest rising and falling rapidly, and you could feel the warmth of his breath against your lips.

“Wait,” he said, his voice low and hoarse. His hands lingered where they were, one on your neck, the other at your waist, but he didn’t move closer again. “We should stop.”

You blinked, still catching your breath. “Why?” you whispered, your fingers still clutching his shirt.

“Because,” he said, laughing softly, though there was a tremor in his voice. “If we don’t, I don’t think I’ll want to.”

The words hung between you, heavier than they should have been. You nodded slowly, pulling back just enough to look at him. His cheeks were flushed, his lips slightly swollen, and there was something vulnerable in his eyes that made your chest tighten.

“Goodnight,” he said softly, his hand brushing against your cheek one last time before he pulled away entirely. He stood, running a hand through his already messy hair, and gave you a small, lopsided smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Goodnight,” you murmured, watching as he turned and disappeared up the stairs to the boys’ dormitory.

You sat there for a long time after he was gone, your fingers still tingling where they had touched him, your lips still warm from the kiss. The fire crackled softly in the hearth, but your thoughts were anything but quiet.

The ache that had lingered between you for weeks had softened, but it hadn’t disappeared. If anything, it had transformed into something else entirely—something that both thrilled and terrified you.

Whatever this was, it wasn’t over. Not yet.

#blaize writes #sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #harry potter x reader #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #sirius black fanfiction #harry potter fanfic #sirius black fanfic #harry potter marauders era #marauders era #marauders era fanfiction #marauders x reader #marauders x you

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simonsomeriley · 3 days ago

Text

sleep deprivation - sirius black ꨄ

warnings: mentions of past family trauma/abuse, sirius experiences post-traumatic stress, sleep deprivation ❤

wc: 745

The common room fire had long since died out, leaving behind the faint smell of smoke and ash. The armchair beneath you was dusty and cold, its cushions long overdue for replacement, but it hadn't been the discomfort that was keeping you awake.

It was him.

Sirius sat on the faint red rug near the hearth, his elbows resting on his knees and his hands raking through his hair. He was a mess of sharp edges and exhaustion, his face pale and gaunt in the faint light from the windows.

“Still awake?” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

He flinched at that, turning to look at you, his storm-grey eyes bloodshot. “Shouldn’t you be in bed?” he asked, his usual cocky lilt dulled into something hollow.

You shrugged, tucking your knees up to your chest. “Shouldn’t you?”

A bitter laugh escaped him, low and dry. “Yeah.”

You didn’t press him, but you didn’t leave either. It'd been like this for days— Sirius spiraling into sleepless nights with nothing but his thoughts for company. He’d become a ghost of himself, barely eating, & barely talking.

But tonight, the cracks were deeper, more visible.

“You need to rest.” you said softly.

“I’m fine.”

“Sirius—”

“I told you, I’m fine!” His voice lashed out like thunder, echoing in the empty room. He stood abruptly, pacing towards the window, his hands trembling as they clenched into fists.

You didn’t flinch. You’d seen him like this before— angry and hurting, but not directed at you. He was angry at himself, at the things out of his control, at the weight of a family that loomed over him like a dark cloud.

“I can’t sleep,” he muttered after a long silence, his back still to you. His voice cracked, and it took everything in you not to rush to him, “Every time I close my eyes, it’s… it’s them. Their faces. Their voices.”

You stood slowly, stepping towards him. “Your family?”

He nodded stiffly. “It’s always the same. My mother screaming. Regulus, hurt, looking at me as if I'd betrayed him…” He let out a shaky breath, pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. “And then it’s… it’s you.”

Your heart stuttered. “Me?”

He turned to face you, his expression raw and unguarded in a way you’d never seen him before, “You. Gone. Hurt. And I can’t stop it, or prevent it, no matter what I do.”

Your chest tightened. Sirius wasn’t the kind to admit to weakness— not to anyone, not even to himself. To see him like this, vulnerable and unraveling, felt like seeing a wound he’d kept away from sight for far too long.

“Sirius,” you said softly to him, taking another step closer. “Your thoughts aren't a manifest of reality. I’m here. I'll always be. I’m safe.”

His jaw clenched, and he looked away, his hands trembling at his sides. “But for how long? You’re close to me now, and that means you’re a target. Everyone that I care about, everyone that I love, is. And if something were to happen to you…”

He didn’t finish that last sentence, his voice trailing off into a heavy silence.

You reached for his hand, wrapping your fingers around his, “Nothing’s going to happen to me. Or you, Siri. We’re in this together.”

He looked at you then, his eyes glassy and filled with something between desperation and disbelief. “How could you be so sure?”

“Because I know you, Sirius. And I know that you'd fight like hell to protect the people you care about.” You squeezed his hand, trying to ground him. “But you can’t fight if you don’t rest.”

He let out a gentle, bitter laugh. “You’re relentless, y'know that?”

“I’ve been told.”

His lips quirked into the faintest smile to mirror yours, though it didn’t reach his eyes, “Alright,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “I’ll try.”

“Good,” you said, tugging him gently toward the couch. “Come on.”

He followed without protest, collapsing onto the cushions like a marionette with its strings cut. You sat beside him, letting him rest his head on your lap as you brushed your fingers through his dark hair.

For the first time in days, weeks, his breathing evened out, his body relaxing against you.

And as you sat there, watching the first light of dawn creep through the windows, you made a silent vow to be the one thing Sirius Black never had growing up: a constant.

#sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black hurt/comfort #sirius black x y/n #sirius black angst #fanfic #whump #sirius black blurb

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luveline · 5 months ago

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Jade can I please get a chatty af yapper sunshine girlfriend with Sirius?? Like May be someone tells her she talks a lot so she's super quiet around him cuz she's worried he'll get annoyed and break up with her but poor Sirius he misses his chatty girl and just angst with fluff

thank you for requesting! fem, 1.4k

James Potter means well. Honestly, you don’t think he has a mean bone in his body, so you try not to take it to heart.

Unfortunately, your attempts to do so don’t work. They really, unquestionably don’t. By the time you’re outside of Sirius’ flat that afternoon, James’ small comment is all you can think of.

“You’re so chatty I’m surprised you don’t run out of breath,” he’d said. Not without love. You’d bumped into him in Sainsbury’s and ended up talking for ages about one thing or another, you know him well, you’d even say you were friends, though he’s of course Sirius’ friend rather than your own. “But I’m the same. God, Sirius used to hate how much I talked, he’d be sick of me. I think I numbed him to it over the years.”

You can’t imagine it. Sirius and James are best friends. With Remus, they’re the most in love threesome of friends you’ve ever met, and it’s nice; it makes you very proud to have a boyfriend who cares for others as deeply as Sirius cares for them. It’s like a constant demonstration of how he’s a good man.

But you’d never stopped to consider that they weren’t always so seamless, and you’ve regrettably never considered that your constant talking is something that could put him off.

You talk to Sirius about everything. There isn’t a word to describe the excitement of having someone waiting to listen to you every single night. You could tell him every detail of a day down to what colour socks you wore and you know he’ll sit there listening with his hand on the small of your back, or his fingers twined between yours. You’ve never felt so loved as to be able to just talk about everything and have him talk back.

But… what if, this whole time, he’s been wishing for a little bit of quiet?

What if eventually, the talking becomes too much?

He must be with you for a reason. You aren’t holding the poor guy hostage, he acts like he’s mad for you ninety percent of the time (while the other ten percent is spent sleeping on your shoulder).

Like now —you knock his door and you can hear him scrambling up from the sofa, the sound of a book dislodged or a remote hitting the rug, you’re not sure. The door yanks open and Sirius smiles at you, pulling you in through the gap with a familiar hand on your hip.

“Hey,” Sirius says, tucking you against his side, “hey, did you get lovelier over the weekend?” He shoves the door closed and gives you a hug with one arm, pausing in the hall. “Sorry I couldn’t see you. I don’t think we should miss another weekend.”

You have a lot to tell him. It’s been ages since you spent nearly three days apart, but James’ conversation stays at the front of your mind.

You decide to be less overwhelming, but not less loving, curling your arm behind his head to pull his cheek down for a kiss. “I don’t think so, either.”

Sirius tilts his head away from you in an invitation for more kissing.

You’re at home in his flat. You take off your shoes and hang up your jacket. You change into a pair of jogging bottoms with loose legs and let him hoist you onto his bed for a few stolen kisses, though he isn’t propositioning you, and you end up laying across his bedspread with one of your legs in his lap as he tells you about his days without you, his thumb sliding with pressure down your calf.

“Mostly I wished I’d asked you to come over anyways, even if it was just to sleep together at the end of the day. Maybe next time we can do that?” he asks.

“Of course we can.” You smile at him indulgently. “I’d come over for twenty minutes if it was all I could get.”

“Or I can come to you,” he says, “even if it’s just twenty minutes.”

He smiles, a beaming thing, and leans down slowly for a soft kiss.

“So,” he asks, his breath on your lips, “how was your weekend? Lonely?”

“So lonely,” you tease lightly, eyes fluttering closed as he continues his massaging of your leg. “But it was okay. I missed you, really, and didn’t do much else.”

“No?” he asks.

Your voice takes on a shine as he squeezes your knee, “Missed your hands.”

“I missed your everything.” He grabs for your forearms and pulls you into a sitting position. “But everything was okay?” he asks more seriously.

“Everything was fine.”

He raises his eyebrows, but eventually lets them relax. “Well, okay. Good, sweetheart, I’m glad it was okay.”

He persuades you into the kitchen to sit with him as he makes dinner, refusing to let you help, and yet insisting you be there in the same room, as though you’d like to be anywhere else. Sirius makes your favourite of his usual rotation, offering you spoonfuls for tasting, gaps of silence stretching as he struggles to find new conversation. You start answering his questions but remember time and time again that Sirius could become totally sick of you. He might already be.

Sirius puts the food on a low heat and washes his hands. He wipes them dry, but when he takes your face, dampness lines the inside of his fingers.

“I’d like for you to tell me what’s wrong,” he says gently, stroking at the line of your startled frown, “before it gets worse. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“Please don’t, lovely. If I’ve done something wrong, please tell me. I want us to last forever, and we can’t do that if you won’t tell me when I upset you.”

“It wasn’t you,” you say instinctively, then regret it.

“So someone has?” he asks, still so gentle as his hands coast down your neck like he’s sculpting you, coming to rest on the slopes leading to your shoulders. “You can tell me anything. You don’t have to keep it to yourself… please.”

“Are you sure?”

“Sweetheart.” He frowns deeply. Couldn’t look more upset. “Of course I’m sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”

You chew it over, not wanting or willing to cause ructions between Sirius and his oldest friend. “Well, I saw James today at the shop, and… we were talking about you…”

He waits. “And?”

“And he told me you– you don’t like talking. That you didn’t like talking, that James used to make you sick of it. So I know I talk too much and you’ve never made me feel like I shouldn’t, but I guess I got into my head thinking you’d get sick of me, too.”

“When we were younger I didn’t like much of anything.” He curls an arm behind your neck to hold you in place, but it’s not a dominant sort of movement, only protective as your noses inch together. “Did you ever read that poem by Bukwoski? Let It Enfold You?”

“What?”

“I’m not very good at explaining myself. I thought if you knew the poem, you’d–” He laughs near your cheek. “I hated everything. It wasn’t James’ fault. He did make me sick of it sometimes, but I just wanted to hide from everything.” He breathes out slowly. “I’ve never wanted to hide from you. I can’t get sick of you. Do you get that? I can’t get sick of you. Listening to you is the best part of my day, you’re my personal chatterbox.”

“Chatterbox,” you repeat teasingly.

“You could talk for Wales,” he says. “And I love it, I don’t want you to stop, because I’ll never be sick of it.”

“I don’t want it to be some secret resentment.”

“I don’t resent you for anything. I knew exactly who you were when we met and I love it.” He takes your face again. “I love it,” he repeats.

You steal a little kiss against the corner of his lips. “What was the poem?” you ask.

“I’ll find my book, and you can read it to me. What do you think?” He takes a slow kiss as you had in the same place, words like honey. “I miss your voice.”

He’s basically pleading. It’s not like Sirius to plead, but you pull it out of him.

“Can I have my dinner first?”

“The one I made while you deprived me?” he asks. “Yes, if you must.”

He takes another kiss, but you’re happy to give it.

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x fem!reader #sirius black x you #sirius black x y/n #sirius x reader fluff #sirius black imagine #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fanfic #sirius black fic #marauders era #marauders #sirius black drabble #sirius black scenario #sirius black oneshot #the marauders #sirius orion black

3K notes · View notes

tsukimirecs · 1 month ago

Text

GRYFFINDOR BOYS

note: remember to read the tags! + i do not own any of these works

FRED WEASLEY

mad woman

cupid crystals

a special friend

recovering a life

deep breath

strawberry letters

date after date

SIRIUS BLACK

complimentary quills

just a natural fact

brighten your days

black dog neighbour

padfoot

HARRY POTTER

harry potter and the long-lost beach episode

harry potter and the late-night company

potter love

gifts

green-eyed idiot

romancing professor potter

CHARLIE WEASLEY

creative writing class

favourites

taming the dragon tamer

lucky charm

let's pretend

GEORGE WEASLEY

heart-to-heart chase

beating a weasley

well-meaning deceit

see you again

it's definitely you

coming home

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ellecdc · 9 days ago

Text

The Bolter

Sirius Black x fem!reader who meet again [5.5k words]

prompt: poly!wolfstar or just Sirius x reader in which they were friends with benefits but it was obvious they loved each other even though they acted like they weren’t. Then, reader finds out shes pregnant and before telling them, they do something stupid. so reader runs away for a few months. When she comes back (only bc she had to for some reason) shes like 6-7 months pregnant

CW: secret pregnancy, angst, FWB to strangers to lovers, second chance fic, post war trauma, both Sirius and reader are meeesssssssssssyyyyy in this! I don't approve of what they've done but I understand it

“So…she’s coming back?” Sirius asked cautiously, focusing more on the condensation pooling on the coaster underneath his pint than the concerned gazes of his two best friends.

“Well, I don’t know if she’s coming back, but she’ll be here for Harry’s birthday.” James mollified, sharing a nervous look with Remus.

“Right.” Sirius murmured around a swallow; throat tight and dry though neither the pint nor the pitcher of water in front of him looked as though they’d be able to help him with the matter.

“Are you going to be alright?” Remus queried, and Sirius offered him the most arrogant scoff he could muster; he missed by a long shot.

“Of course I’m going to be alright.” He huffed. “Why? Can’t two friends see each other after five and a half months of silence?”

“Sirius-” James started, but Sirius carried on.

“She’s the only one who’s been silent, you know?” Though he knew that they did indeed both know. “I’ve tried. I’ve tried reaching out.”

“Pads.” Remus offered consolingly, looking frustratingly like he was going to reach a hand out to Sirius as if he were some over tired toddler on the brink of a meltdown.

“Stop, no I- I’m fine, honest.” He insisted as he took a steadying breath. “I- you… talked to her, then?”

James and Remus shared another look before James allowed the segue.

“Mostly by owl, but she has spoken on the phone with Lily a few times.”

Sirius nodded as he considered this; considered the number of owls Sirius had sent that had gone unanswered - perhaps even unopened if the silence meant anything at all.

“She’s…okay?”

Remus let out a sigh as he shot Sirius a tight smile that looked more like a grimace. “She’s…vague.”

“She doesn’t share a whole lot.” James agreed. “Says she’s fine, things are good. Mostly asks about…all of us, Harry.”

“She’s still staying with that great aunt,” Remus added, “helping her with the property.”

“She seeing anyone?” There was no point in pretending that wasn’t the most pressing matter in Sirius’ mind; of course it was. And as angry and bitter as the idea made Sirius, it would have been his own fault, his own doing. He had no one to blame but himself.

And he’d have to live the rest of his life knowing he was the one who let you slip away - pushed you away - right into the arms of someone else.

“Not that she’s mentioned.” Remus responded honestly; he couldn’t say for sure that you weren’t, but if you were, you clearly hadn’t said anything about it.

“Right.” Sirius offered shortly.

“Pads, I…we would understand if it's too hard for you to see her. If you can’t come-”

“Don’t be daft.” Sirius scoffed deploringly. “I’m not going to miss my godson’s birthday. If anyone should be missing it, it should be her; I’ve been here for the past four and a half months, she’s the one who fucked off for good.”

“Sirius-”

“I don’t understand why you had to invite her!” Sirius shouted then, startling even himself when he realised how breathless he sounded all of a sudden.

James smiled at him sadly; Sirius wished he’d stop doing that. “We wanted all of Harry’s uncles and his aunt to be there, Sirius…it’s important, yeah? We…we almost didn’t get this chance.”

Sirius could feel a wicked migraine coming on; between talking about you, the close calls and the fact that the group of you were all alive following the war by nothing but chance, and the fact that the person Sirius was most angry with was himself, he downed the rest of his pint and flagged the server in favour of having to look at the pitiful gazes being shot at him by Remus and James.

Sirius couldn’t tell if he was eager for Harry’s second birthday or dreading it. But like it or not, Sirius was going to be seeing you again.

It had felt like a good idea at the time.

It felt beyond foolish now, but it had felt like a good idea at the time.

*ೃ༄.ೃ࿐

“Sirius, we just won. We just won, why do you have to leave now?” You practically begged as you followed Sirius through his flat.

“Because if I don’t get out now, I’m going to be stuck here for eternity.” He all but spat at you as he shoved articles of clothing into his duffle rather haphazardly. You felt like grabbing the bag from him and folding them properly if the act wouldn’t leave you feeling like you were aiding and abetting his abandoning you.

“But what about James? And Remus? What about Harry? You fought this war for them, and they for you - we just got them back!”

“And they’ll be here when I’m ready to come home!” Sirius shouted; turning to look at you with wild, red rimmed eyes.

“What about me?” You asked quietly, hating how small you sounded.

“What about you?” He asked; face falling painfully neutral. If you didn’t know better, you would have thought he was occluding.

“I…I don’t know.” You started awkwardly, shrugging one shoulder. “I thought…maybe we’d have a chance now. To try?.”

“Y/N.” Sirius sighed as he rubbed harshly at his eyes; entire being oozed exhaustion at having to have this conversation with you. “Have I not been entirely clear about what this was between us?”

“Right.” You agreed quickly, biting roughly on your lip and looking anywhere but at him as he let his hand fall away from his face.

“It’s…it’s not you, doll-” but even your humourless scoff didn’t derail him “I’m not the kind to settle down and be content I- I wouldn’t be enough for you.”

“I’m not asking you for any more than what we have, Sirius-”

“Yes you are.”

“-I just want you to stay.”

“That’s too much for me.” He stated; his voice never raised though he may as well have screamed it at you. “I cannot sit here and play house, I cannot be that guy for you.”

“Cannot or will not?” You asked quietly, regretting the question the second it came out of your mouth and he looked at you with nothing but pity in his eyes.

“Y/N…”

“I’m sorry I asked.” You let out with a chuckle as you harshly wiped tears from under your eyes.

“It’s…it’s not forever, yeah? I just…I can’t see myself being happy here…not right now, at least; not for a while.”

“Where will you go?” Your voice grated painfully as it came out, but you tried to keep an air of nonchalance about you. You wouldn’t look at him, but you could see his shoulders shrug helplessly.

“I don’t know…everywhere. Anywhere.”

Anywhere was better than stuck here with you, apparently.

“I hope it’s nice, wherever it is.” You offered, and you found that you meant it. As much as it hurt to say, you really, really meant it. Sirius had been fighting and running his entire life, and he finally won. If he wanted to celebrate his victory by taking off to be that rich, vague uncle who popped by with lavish gifts every so often, who were you to deny him?

You loved him.

You were in love with him.

You loved him enough to let him go.

*ೃ༄.ೃ࿐

He had sent James a postcard a few weeks later. Turns out he started in the South of France; his family had a home there that had been left untouched by the war, and Sirius was going to start by figuring out what to do with the property.

And you? Well, you found out you were pregnant.

You suppose it was a small mercy that Sirius wasn’t here to know; you’re sure it would have hurt more hearing him tell you he was leaving if there were two of you he couldn’t find it in him to love. You would have hated it even more if he felt trapped into staying with you just for this.

But all this meant was that you couldn’t stay, either.

You supposed that was alright, though; the life you wanted to build here was with Sirius. You loved your friends, but you had a little one to think about now, too.

You made up a story about a great aunt needing help tending to her property and wishing to be closer to your relatives now that you could be, now that it was safe. No one questioned it, likely because Remus had done the same following the war; moving back home to help his dad and ailing mother tend the property in whatever ways he could.

You found yourself a little cottage, you wrote to the boys and had the occasional phone call with Lily, and you grew.

It had felt like a good idea at the time.

But now you were almost six months pregnant and returning home for the first time since you moved to celebrate your nephew’s birthday with all of your closest friends, the love of your life whose child you were carrying, and none of them knew.

You wondered if you should even go, but the thought of missing out on sweet Harry’s second birthday that the lot of you almost never got the chance to see made your throat constrict with tears you refused to shed since the war.

You wondered if you should tell everyone before you arrived, but the thought of them all discussing you and your pregnancy without you being there left you feeling small and ashamed.

You wondered if you should tell Sirius, but you looked over at the stack of unopened letters he had sent to you in the past four months - the first thin, perhaps a postcard, the second and third were thicker, the fourth was by far the thickest (like he had drafted an autobiography that he wanted you to proofread for him), the fifth was similar to the second, whilst the sixth (the last) couldn’t be more than one page - and wondered how the hell you’d even start that conversation after all this time.

Hey, remember me? Yeah, the bird who caught feelings during our friends with benefits situation that we both agreed would remain platonic amidst a battle for survival and then begged you to stay with no success? Well, whilst you’ve been off probably shagging every beautiful woman across the British Isles, I’ve been pregnant. Right, with your child. How was France, by the way?

You swallowed around your gag reflex and groaned at your image in the mirror. You put on a pair of gingham pants with the baggiest band-tee you could find, planned on sucking in the best you could if anyone (when everyone) insisted on a hug and hoped to every deity that they all just assumed you’d been eating really well since the end of the war.

You smoothed the fabric over your bump one last time before you left - looking at the proof that, if nothing else, you were protecting more than just yourself, and you let that be enough - before you grabbed Harry’s birthday present and called for Potter Manor, throwing a fistfull of floo powder into your fireplace and travelling by way of the flames.

You could hear Harry squealing in delight in one of the adjacent rooms as you stepped into the floo reception room at Potter Manor; a smile taking over your face uninhibitedly at the sounds of the people you loved more than life itself, happy and celebrating.

How could you have gone so long without this?

“Y/N!” Lily shrieked as she made for you, and you sucked in before returning her hug. “Merlin, you're glowing! Where’s your aunt's place again?”

“Erm. Killarney.” You offered; not entirely untrue - you did have an aunt in Killarney.

“Well,” she let out with a breath, eyes turning a touch glassy as they darted across your face, “it seems that Irish air’s been for you.”

You smiled back at your friend before pulling her back in for another hug. “I’ve missed you, Lils.”

“Don’t let it go so long next time, yeah? We can come to you, too; I’m teaching James how to be a muggle, and Harry’s only had the odd burst of accidental magic yet. We could play the part in front of your aunt.”

“I’d love that, Lily.” You responded earnestly.

“Y/N!” James hollered then before you were being bodily tackled by the former quidditch chaser, a brief flash of anxiety at his hold around your stomach abating only when he relinquished his hold on you. “Where in the sodding hell have you been!?”

“Killarney.” Lily answered for you.

“I love Killarney!”

“Have you ever been to Killarney, Prongs?” Remus asked then, appearing in the door as he leaned against the archway.

“No! But I love it there! I just know it!”

“Hey Moony.” You greeted, quickly accepting his open arms and breathing him in.

“We’ve missed you.” He murmured into your hair, and you couldn’t help the traitorous hitch in your heart that he might’ve meant-

“Uncle Pafoo!” Harry squealed, suddenly standing right underneath you.

“That’s right, Haz!” The voice that haunts your dreams called out. “Auntie is here!”

“Hullo, Harry!” You cheered as you picked him up, sucking in before settling on your hip. “Happy birthday, little dude.”

“Am two!” He announced as he held up four fingers.

“You are two! Way to go!” You laughed. “Is everyone here?” You asked the room, shooting Sirius a tight smile so you couldn’t be accused of hostility when your heart stuttered for an entirely different reason.

He looked tired - a bone deep tired that no amount of sleep could rectify - and the bags under his eyes seemed to be chronic. But he was still so beautiful; his hair had grown slightly longer since the last time you’d seen it, the last time you’d run your fingers through it, the last time you’d brought sheers to it, and he donned more than a few new tattoos if the few you could see were enough to go by.

You had to look away.

“Reg’s going to be by after work; his part-time student called in sick so he needed to be there to close the shop himself. Thankfully, they’re only open in the morning on Sunday’s.” Remus explained kindly.

“Good, it’ll be nice to see him.” You offered, and the room fell slightly awkward.

“Uncle Pafoo, aeroplane?” Harry asked then, and whatever exhaustion seemed to be plaguing Sirius vanished as he beamed at his godson.

“Absolutely, little man!” He agreed, holding his arms out and taking Harry’s weight from you.

“Do you want something to drink, Y/N? Wine? Beer, Cider? Juice? Water?” James rapid fire, causing Lily to groan.

“We just got her back, Potter. Do try to control yourself.”

“Water would be great, Jamie. Thank you.” You laughed, following the group into the open concept kitchen-to-living room.

Save the fact that you and Sirius seemed to be doing acrobatics to avoid each other, you were almost stunned at how easy and natural being back here felt. Regulus returned and the two of you shared friendly jibes, Lily caught you up on all of the drama at the Ministry, James strong armed you into agreeing to join them for their next pub quiz night, and Remus said that your old professors all wished you well.

You loved your cottage - the home you’d built for yourself and your little one - but you found yourself feeling homesick for here, and you hadn’t even left yet.

You were leaning on your elbows against the kitchen island, watching Sirius and Regulus pretend to be knights in shining armour as they fought off a fire breathing dragon (Harry) to save the princess (James) when Remus appeared beside you and mirrored your stance.

“It’s not the same without you, you know?” He murmured then.

“But they seem to be alright.” You responded simply, and Remus allowed the two of you to fall into silence for a few beats.

“How far along are you?”

You stood up straight and turned to stare at him in horror, only to see him smiling kindly at you.

“How do you-”

“Lycanthropy - I could smell it on you.” He said with an embarrassed wrinkle of his nose. “I knew Lily was pregnant before she did.”

You shushed him and looked over your shoulder to ensure no one else could hear you.

“Come.” He said with a sigh, gently taking you by the elbow and ushering you out of the sliding doors to the back yard and closing it behind the two of you.

“Remus-”

“Is it his?” He cut you off; his face held no judgement though perhaps just a touch of concern. For you or his best friend/virtual brother-in-law, you weren’t sure.

“Yes.” You whispered, not bothering to clarify who he was talking about; you both knew.

Remus simply nodded as he looked you over. “Is that why you left?”

“He left first.” You hissed petulantly.

“He left you, but you left all of us.” Remus countered somewhat sternly. “Besides, I didn’t ask about him; is this why you left?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because, Remus!” You shouted, tears flooding your vision as you turned to look at him. “Because he didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want this, he didn’t want me. I wasn’t going to force him to come back just because… just because.”

“Don’t you think he should have been able to make that choice for himself?” Remus asked gently.

“He chose! He did choose! He told me he couldn’t play house, he told me he couldn’t be this person for me. I loved him enough to accept that. I loved him enough to let him go.”

“Loved?” Remus asked with a tilt of his head. “Past tense?”

“Remus.” You groaned. “Please.”

“He came back for you, you know.” Remus pointed out. “He left you, you left us, but he came back for you.”

“Stop it.”

“It’s true, Y/N.”

“And so what if it is?” You nearly sobbed. “So what if he did, Remus? What can I do? I can’t go back in time and change my mind, I can’t go back and fix this. He made choices, I made choices, and here we are.”

Remus heaved a sigh and looked at you sadly. “I don't think either of you realise that your choices don’t have to remain permanent; there can be an expiration date on them.”

You were catching your breath from your mini temper tantrum when you heard the glass door slide open, both you and Remus turning to see Sirius standing there almost shy - far shier than you’d ever seen him before.

“Just talk to him? Okay? You..don’t have to tell him now, just…talk to him.” Remus whispered before heading towards the door, clapping Sirius on the back before disappearing back into the house.

“Hey.” Sirius offered cautiously after a few beats of silence, coming to stand beside you as the two of you looked over the railing of the patio to the rest of the manor grounds.

“Hey.” You returned dumbly, clearing your throat before continuing. “You…you look good, Sirius.”

Sirius scoffed, and you could feel your shoulder rising before you saw him smirk at you - if not somewhat sadly - cutting you a playful glare from the corner of his eye. “Did you take up lying there in Ireland?”

You let out a breathy half-laugh. “I’m not lying.”

“Then you need glasses. I look like shite.”

“You look tired.” You amended.

“I’m exhausted.” He agreed, and the two of you lapsed into silence.

“You look good, though.” He continued. “Healthy.”

You hummed in agreement. “Funny what not having to run on rations and broken hours of sleep on military cots does for a person.”

“Why haven’t I heard from you, Y/N?” He blurted then, turning his entire body to face you.

“Sirius, I-”

“Everyone else has. You’ve spoken to Lily on the phone. James and Remus have gotten letters. Even Reg got a postcard for his birthday.”

“I’m sorry.” Was all you could manage to say.

“I wrote to you.” He continued. “Letters, a lot. Did you get them?”

You nodded your head yes shamefully.

“Did you read them?”

You felt your heart splinter at how hopeful and heartbroken he sounded over it. You felt like scum of the earth when you shook your head no, and he let out a sigh.

“I guess that makes me feel a little bit better, then.” He said as he lit a cigarette and took a deep drag.

You found yourself taking a step away from him when you asked “why does that make you feel better?”

He let out a humourless laugh that forced smoke from his lips. “At least now I know that my begging for a second chance, begging you to come home, professing my love for you isn’t what kept you away.”

“Sirius-”

“I messed up, Y/N.” He declared earnestly. “I…I was fucking scared, terrified. I’d spent so much of my life living with one foot on the threshold of hell that after the war, I didn’t know how to live amongst the undead.”

He took a moment to catch his breath as if he’d run all the way here just to tell you something. “And I ran. I bolted, I…”

“You left.” You finished for him.

“I left.” He agreed. “I… I didn’t know, Y/N.”

“Didn’t know what?” You asked as you choked back tears.

“Didn’t know what I had, or what I wanted. Or that I had everything that I wanted.”

“And you do, now? You know what you want?” You asked, and a look of determination painted his features as he met your gaze head on.

“For my entire life, I had never known what family meant, so I wasn’t even aware that I’d created my own with all of you until I’d risked it all. I was so sure I didn’t want to be like my parents that I never realised I may actually…want to be a parent someday. I was so sure I didn’t want to be my father that I never realised I actually did want to be a partner someday. I was so certain I’d never know what true love felt like that I didn’t even realise I had it right here all along with you.”

“Sirius-”

“I messed up. I left. But what I don’t understand is why you did. Or why you stayed away.” He took a step towards you with his cigarette long forgotten in one of his hands, the ash threatening to burn his fingers before you plucked it and stubbed it out on the stone railing. He barely flinched. “Why’d you go?”

“I didn’t want to sit around and wait for you, Sirius. I- it hurt, I was hurt. And then-”

“I’m sorry.” He offered quickly, but you shook your head.

“I’m not telling you this for you to be sorry, I just-”

“I came back for you.”

“But it wasn’t just about me anymore, Sirius!” You shouted then, and you watched his brows furrow before his face fell in horror.

“You’re seeing someone.” He asked, though he phrased it as more of a statement; like he’d been expecting it.

“I’m not seeing anyone, Sirius.” You sighed.

“Then why’d you leave? Why’d you stay away?”

“Because I’m pregnant.” You blurted, and Sirius fell silent. “I’m almost six months pregnant.”

“Six-” He started, eyes falling to your stomach still hidden behind the baggy article of clothing before you smoothed the fabric over your ever rounding bump. “Six months. Six…”

You let him do the maths in the head as he stared hard at your stomach like he was sitting in divination and it was a crystal ball that might just give him the answers if only he stared at it long enough.

“It’s mine?” He finally concluded.

“Yes.” You whispered.

“It’s mine. You’re pregnant, it’s mine.” He murmured, before his eyes met yours again. “You’re pregnant with my child?”

“Right.” You agreed, and he crumpled to a heap on the floor.

“Sirius Orion Black,” Sirius heard Remus hiss, clearly hovering somewhere over him, “I swear to Godric if you do not wake up and eat some of this godsdamned vanilla cake you bought, your brother is going to skin you alive.”

“It’s true.” James agreed from somewhere on Sirius’ other side. “He actually ran to the store when he found out you bought vanilla because he knew Remus wouldn’t eat any of it. Remus is going to get his chocolate cake, and you’re going to get egged.”

“Shut up.” Sirius hissed as he scrunched his eyes closed. “Fuck.”

“How do you feel, mate?” James asked rather jovially as he clapped him roughy on the shoulder.

“Like hell.”

“Why’s that?” Remus joined in.

“Because I was in the middle of a dream and you sods woke me up going on about cake.” He muttered as he opened his eyes, realising then that he’d been propped up on a number of cushions in one of Lily and James’ spare rooms.

“S’he awake?” Lily whispered, and Sirius craned his neck to see you and Lily poke your heads into the room.

“Oh my gods.” Sirius breathed as he sat up, likely far too fast for someone who fell unconscious mere moments ago. “Oh my gods, you’re actually here?”

“Did you hit your head, mate?” James asked as he prodded at Sirius’ head, causing Sirius to swat his arms away as he shifted towards the edge of the bed.

“You’re here.” He whispered as you slowly made your way into the room.

“I’m here.” You offered cautiously, eyes darting around at your oldest friends like there might be some secret threat lurking in the room.

“You’re pregnant…” He tried then, punching the air right out of Lily and James who both spun to stare at you in shock.

You smoothed the fabric of your shirt over your midsection again to expose a very obvious (now that everyone could actually see it) baby bump.

“Oh my gods!” Lily and James chorused, causing Remus to snort.

“You knew, didn’t you!?” Lily accused Remus who held his hands up in surrender.

“Only when she walked in, and not a second sooner.”

“With my child.” Sirius continued, and you nodded at him.

“Y/N.” Lily winced. “You-”

“You sodding scared me!” You shrilled then, grabbing one of the throw pillows James had dumped onto the ground to make room for Sirius and swinging it at him.

“I scared you!?” Sirius shrieked right back, much to the delight of Harry who started banging on the throw pillow that had landed beside him.

“I thought I killed you!”

“Oh, well I’m terribly sorry that finding out the woman I’ve been in love with for years and pining hopelessly over for months - who was missing for all intents and purposes, may I remind you - is pregnant with my child happened to be a little shocking.” Sirius sneered sarcastically.

“Well I only went ‘missing’ because the man I’ve been hopelessly in love with for years and pining hopelessly over for months took off an-” The abrupt end of your statement nearly gave the room whiplash as you cut yourself off mid sentence and stared at Sirius like you’d never seen him before.

“What…what just happened?” James whispered carefully.

“Years?” You whispered then, and Sirius hated every version of himself that deigned to let you go without knowing just how loved you were.

“Probably when we were still just cosmic dust.” Sirius smiled sadly. “I’m sorry I didn’t always realise, I’m sorry I didn’t make sure that you knew.”

“I take it to guess there isn’t an aunt in Killarney?” Lily offered then, smiling kindly at you when you turned your attention towards her.

“No, I- I think there actually is an aunt in Killarney, I just don’t live with her.”

“Where do you live?” Sirius asked eagerly, wondering if you could hear it in his voice or even see on his face just how desperate he was to know everything about you.

“Near Tintagel.” You offered abashedly as Remus slapped his hand on his thigh.

“You minx!” He scolded you. “You lived basically across the channel from me this whole time!”

“I hope it’s nice, wherever it is” You offered him then, smiling through your tears as Sirius swallowed around his bile threatening its way up his oesophagus.

“I hope it’s nice.” Sirius blurted suddenly, and Sirius thanked the heavens for Remus John Lupin who seemed to understand that the conversation delved beyond the need of an audience, scooping Harry up and closing the door behind Lily, James, and himself to give you two some privacy.

“It’s nice.” You offered wetly. “It’s quiet.”

Sirius hummed in acknowledgement. “In Tintagel, near Merlin’s cave?”

You laughed, which saw Sirius smiling. “I’m not right in Tintagel, just outside. My neighbours are mostly sheep.”

“Does it have a picket fence?”

“To keep the sheep out of my garden.” You nodded with a smile.

“Flowers; lots of them.” Sirius deduced, you nodded again though Sirius watched your smile falter.

“You’d probably hate it.”

“Are you there?” He asked quickly.

“Well, usually, yes.” You offered, and Sirius shrugged easily.

“Sounds as though it might be my favourite place in the world, then.”

The next breath that left you shuddered on its way out, and Sirius finally stood and met you in the middle of the room; close enough to touch but not daring to. He hadn’t earned that right yet.

“Take me with you?” He all but begged then, and your face crumpled in misery.

“Sirius, I don’t want you to follow me because you have to, I-”

“I don’t have to though, I know I don’t; I know you’d never make me.” He assured you then, lifting a hand but pausing to wait for you to nod at him before he placed it on your upper arm. “The letters, Y/N, I- I’ve been looking for you for months.”

A sob tore through you as you lowered your head, and Sirius allowed himself to catch it in his free hand.

“I don’t want you to feel bad; I’m not telling you so that you feel bad, love.” The endearment falling off his tongue so easily now that he had you in his arms. “But I need you to know that I want you - any of you, all of you - and have for a very long time.”

“It’s just…you said-” and Sirius knew exactly what he said; he had played that conversation over and over and over in his mind until he found himself sick over it more than once. But we waited for you to tell him anyhow; he’d always wait for you. “You couldn’t settle down and be content, you couldn’t play house; you weren’t that kind of guy.”

“I know, doll. I know.” He whispered. “I…I didn’t think I was capable of it. I didn’t think I deserved everything I wanted and I knew that you deserved better. That you deserve better.”

“But?”

“But I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life trying to prove you otherwise; trying to give you everything you deserve.”

“Sirius…” You sighed, and Sirius could see your walls cracking. “I…I’m-”

“Take me home? Please?” He begged then, words interrupted by a sob of his own. “To Tintagel, to Killarney, to bloody fucking Azkaban or the bottom of the sodding ocean, I don’t care where it is just as long as it’s with you, please. Please.”

Your hands landed on Sirius’ chest and he was sure you could feel his hummingbird heart beating under your fingertips. He only hoped you knew how it beat for you.

“Please bring me home?”

James didn’t know if he could consider this a success or not.

His motivation was not singular; it was a ‘hit two fairies with one gobstone’ sort of scenario, so to speak. Was his son turning two? Indeed he was! Was James throwing a party for said son’s birthday? You’re damned right he was. But was it also a really good excuse to force two of his idiot best friends into the same room again? Absolutely.

Except James seems to have gotten slightly more than he bargained for; Sirius falling unconscious in his childhood backyard, you sobbing into Lily’s shoulder out in the hallway as he and Remus tried to bring him back from the dead, Remus sneering at a slice of birthday cake like it personally offended him and Regulus threatening to defend his boyfriend’s honour, and - apparently - a new niece or nephew coming in the next three-ish months.

But when he looked over to see you and Sirius emerging from the spare room - both of your faces tear stained and puffy from the grief and torment you no doubt put yourselves through - hands intertwined between your bodies and your hand resting protectively over your growing bump, and a spark in Sirius’ eyes James had thought he lost in the war but now realised he only lost when he lost you…

…yeah, James figured he could probably consider this a success.

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daenysx · 2 months ago

Note

12:47 am + poly!marauders!!

12.47 AM | POLY!MARAUDERS

"she's asleep, jamie." remus whispers as his huge hand works wonders on your back.

"i can carry her to bed." james tells his boyfriend, his fingers play with sirius's hair.

"no, let's just stay here." sirius disagrees. "for a little longer."

james is gorgeous when he smiles. so gorgeous, it makes remus's chest fill with the most tender waves of affection. he stares at the boy's lips for a second, his hand on you never stops.

"i'm gonna fall asleep-" sirius says with a needy smirk, his eyes half open. "if you keep doing that."

"yeah, as if it's not what you want all the time."

"come on, prongs. be nice to me, i'm tired."

james smiles. he leans in to give sirius a kiss. "you're a big baby, you know that?"

"mm- you love me, shut up."

sirius curls up into a ball, hugging james's chest with long arms. you still stay on top of remus, ear pressed on his heart. "dove?" he whispers. "do you wanna go to bed?"

you hear him but your ears feel cloudy. it's so warm, you can hear the wind out there. remus is soft, you wanna be buried on his chest. "remus."

"wanna stay here?" he asks, gently.

you nod. you don't even know what you're saying yes to, but it's okay when he keeps touching you.

"it's alright." remus whispers. "you can sleep. you've been so tired."

it's the best feeling, to be taken care of in your most vulnerable state. you don't need to think for anything when they are with you, they would do everything to keep you nice and warm, safe and content under the blankets. you snuggle closer. maybe it's possible to stay here forever.

cinnamon girl sleepover ♡

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moons-and-mobility-aids · 14 hours ago

Text

Content Warnings: Adult content (video of a MMM threesome, d/s dynamics, praise kink), mostly accurate depictions of being an onlyfans creator ( hi, I am one), reader is fem, uses a wheelchair, and has cerebral palsy. Taglist: @alohastitch0626, @jspidey5

Your thoughts have been straying to them more often than you'd like to admit.

From the moment Prongs subscribed to you, they've been a persistent presence at the back of your mind. Their comments, their likes, their messages—all carrying an undercurrent of something that piques your curiosity. You've never been one to pay too much attention to specific followers, but these three...they're different.

Is it the way Prongs flirts without crossing boundaries, his words always respectful yet suggestive? Or perhaps it's Padfoot's bravado, his messages imbued with a confidence that makes you want to learn more about the man behind the screen. And then there's Moony, ever present and yet so elusive, his own brand of mystery stirring questions within you.

The knowledge that they are creators as well is inescapable. It was made evident when Prongs subscribed to your OnlyFans, and the content on his free feed has not gone unnoticed by you. You hesitate to watch any of it, afraid of what you might feel if you do, yet curiosity gnaws at you with persistent teeth.

The temptation to find their profiles on the free porn sites has been there since the beginning, a low hum in the back of your mind. You know they have them—Prongs mentions his in his bio, and it would be strange if Moony and Padfoot didn't as well. But you've held yourself back, created an unspoken rule: just because they consume your content doesn't mean you need to consume theirs.

Today, that rule is harder to follow. Your curiosity is piqued, not just by what they've said but by the mystery of them. The way they speak, the things they like... it paints a picture you're desperate to see filled in. You want to know what their voices sound like, how they move, the dynamic between them that's hinted at in every message, and if you’re being honest, the thought of seeing them together on screen sends a thrill through you that's hard to ignore.

You power up your laptop, the screen's glow casting long shadows across your desk. It doesn't take long to find what you're looking for—their online identities are well known in certain circles, their usernames public, their content tantalisingly explicit.

The thumbnail image of the first video you find is eye-catching; as always, their faces are hidden, their identities preserved by careful angles and strategic cropping, but there's an intimacy to the way their bodies entwine that speaks volumes, even in this tiny preview.

Your pulse quickens as you hover over the play button. You've watched countless videos before—you create adult content yourself, after all—but there's something different about this one. Perhaps it's the fact that you've interacted with them, shared a few messages, imagined them watching you perform with the same intensity you're about to direct at their on-screen display.

You click play.

The video starts mid-scene, the three of them already engaged, their bodies tangled. It's not the polished product of a professional studio; there are no theatrical lights or artificial poses. Instead, it captures a scene that feels stolen from someone's private moments—intimate, raw, and achingly real.

You can't see their faces, as expected, but somehow that doesn't detract from the allure. If anything, it enhances it, allowing your imagination to fill in the gaps, painting a picture that's more personal than any explicit detail could provide.

Prongs is on his knees on the bed, holding Padfoot's hips as he drives into him from behind. Their movements are fluid yet intense, a testament to familiarity and desire woven together. Even without seeing Prongs's face, you can hear his heavy breaths punctuated by soft grunts, each one matching the rhythm of his slow, deliberate thrusts. Padfoot is on all fours, his head buried in the sheets, but his participation is far from passive. Every now and then, his back arches, a low moan escaping him and getting absorbed into the fabric beneath.

Then your gaze shifts, and you find Moony.

He's positioned at the head of the bed, leaning against the headboard, legs spread wide. One hand rests in Padfoot's hair, fingers tangling in the dark strands while guiding him where he wants. Padfoot's mouth works eagerly on him, the sound of slick movement barely audible over the ragged breaths filling the room. Moony's other hand lies idle on his thigh, fingers tracing absent patterns on his own skin, a stark contrast to the control he exerts elsewhere. Despite the fervor with which Padfoot services him, it's clear who sets the pace, who holds the reins of this encounter.

His voice is the first to reach your ears—steady, low, a soothing balm that belies the tension beneath. And yet, there's something else in his tone, an edge that prickles at your senses and sends shivers down your spine.

"Good boy," Moony murmurs, the words slipping out like a caress. "Just like that, Pads."

You lean closer to the screen, breath hitching as you hear him—really hear him—for the first time. His voice is just as you imagined it: firm but not harsh, commanding without needing to raise its volume. It's clear who holds the reins here, even if Prongs is the one driving the action.

Prongs grunts softly, the sound reverberating through the room as he buries himself deeper into Padfoot. He moves with calculated precision, each thrust gaining momentum as he finds his rhythm. There's a restraint in his movements, a sense of control teetering on the edge of release. You can almost feel the anticipation coiling within him, waiting for the signal to let go. Despite being the one physically leading, it's obvious he's not the one calling the shots.

"Such a greedy boy," Moony's voice coos, a softness there that contradicts the rough pull of his fingers through Padfoot's hair. He tugs lightly, guiding Padfoot's movements with a firm but gentle hand. "You need it so much, don't you?"

The sound that rumbles from Padfoot's throat is all the answer he needs, and Moony chuckles.

Prongs makes a sound, half-growl and half-gasp, as he thrusts into Padfoot. His grip appears to tighten on Padfoot's hips, fingers digging into firm flesh. The rhythm is relentless, driving them both towards a precipice they can't yet see but can feel looming ever closer.

"Fuck," Prongs breathes, the word barely audible over the slick sounds of their bodies moving together. "So fucking tight."

Padfoot whimpers, the noise muffled by the length filling his mouth. His body rocks forward with each of Prongs's thrusts, pushing him further onto Moony.

It's too much—the sight of them, the sounds they make, the raw intimacy of this moment. It's like watching a dance only they know the steps to, a silent understanding passed between them with every move. You feel like an outsider here, looking in on something sacred and private.

Yet you can't tear your eyes away.

The camera angle shifts, bringing into sharper focus the way Moony's hand rests in Padfoot's hair, fingers rhythmically tightening and loosening as if conducting an orchestra of pleasure. It's a subtle show of power, one that belies the calm detachment in his voice. Yet there's a glint of satisfaction in his eyes, a soft hum of approval when Padfoot's moans grow louder and Prongs's breath hitches with each slow, deliberate thrust.

"Fuck, Moony... can I—" Prongs's voice is strained, the words barely more than a breathless rasp against the backdrop of flesh meeting flesh.

"No." The denial is swift, Moony's voice steady even as it curls around the edges with a hint of amusement. "Not yet. You wait until I say."

A low groan rumbles from Prongs's throat, but he doesn't protest further. His hands tighten around Padfoot's hips, guiding him with an urgency that borders on desperation. Yet even as he seeks release, there's a restraint to his movements, a conscious effort to hold back the tide that threatens to sweep him under. It's as though he's fighting against the current, struggling to stay afloat while Moony's words pull him deeper into uncharted waters.

The sounds of Padfoot's pleasure grow in volume and urgency, mingling with the wet noises of his mouth working over Moony's length. His breath hitches as he tries to keep pace with the onslaught of sensation, giving himself over entirely to the moment.

You watch, entranced by the scene playing out before you. There's a rawness to it, yes, but also an unexpected intimacy in the way their bodies respond to one another. This is more than just sex; it's a display of trust, of need, a manifestation of a bond that runs deeper than skin.

A low groan ripples through Moony, his fingers flexing against Padfoot's scalp. He tugs the dark curls, pulling Padfoot’s head back, forcing him to look up. The camera angle still shields Padfoot's face from view, but there's no mistaking the tension coiling in Moony's frame, the tremor in his voice as he speaks.

"You're doing so well for us, Pads," Moony murmurs, his voice barely audible above the rasp of cloth and skin. His hand moves from Padfoot's hair, disappearing from view but its destination is clear — a gentle caress against a cheek that goes unseen but not unfelt. "You want to come, don't you? You've been such a good boy."

Padfoot makes a sound, half-choked and desperate, as he nods. The motion is sharp, almost frantic, and the camera holds steady, capturing the raw edge of need that vibrates through him.

A soft chuckle rumbles from Moony, and the camera pans out slightly, bringing Prongs back into view. He’s straining, holding back with visible effort even as he drives into Padfoot with a steady rhythm. “What do you think, Prongs? Has he earned it?”

Prongs groans, the sound thick with need. “Yes. Fuck, yes.”

You can't see Moony's face, but you can hear the satisfaction in his voice as his hand returns to Padfoot's hair, guiding him back to his waiting erection. "Come for me, Pads."

The command sends a ripple of anticipation through you, and you watch as Padfoot's body stiffens, his hips jerking in sync with the low moan that escapes his lips. The sound is muffled by Moony's cock, but it's loud enough to send a shiver down your spine.

Prongs lets out a deep grunt then, his rhythm faltering as he reaches his own climax. His body trembles against Padfoot's, the two of them caught in the throes of ecstasy under Moony's watchful gaze.

"Good boys," Moony murmurs, his hand still buried in Padfoot’s hair.

The video cuts out then, leaving behind only the image of them lying there together, bodies still moving in small, unconscious ways from the aftershocks of their shared pleasure. It feels intimate, like something you shouldn’t be seeing but can't tear yourself away from.

As the screen goes dark, you lean back in your chair, your heart racing and your skin tingling from what you've just witnessed. You’ve seen plenty of porn before, and made hours of it yourself, but this… this was something else entirely. More real, more visceral. There’s a connection between them that’s hard to put into words, a bond that transcends the physical act they’ve just performed.

You close your laptop, letting the images settle in your mind. You've heard their voices now, seen them in action, and it's only fuelled your curiosity, your interest. You wonder how they would react if they knew you were watching too, with the same intensity they've been watching you.

For now, you let the moment linger. You've stepped over a boundary today, one that feels both exhilarating and dangerous, but there is no regret. Only anticipation for what comes next.

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amiableness · 9 months ago

Text

Little Lies

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem! Reader

Summary: James asks Sirius and Y/n to pretend to date after he blurts out they are to Lily.

Word Count: 11.4k

Warnings: smut 18+, male masturbation, oral fem receiving, fingering, unprotected sex (pls be so careful!), reader wears a bikini top, and jealousy

A/N 💌 Hope you all enjoy this; it's been my baby for a while!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“I may have severely fucked up.” James sighs, his features tight with guilt as he stands before you. His chest is heaving like he has run all the way to you—it’s a likely theory.

Remus glances up from beside you; the two of you had been buried in your homework in the common room when James came racing in. He’s disappointed that James has disrupted the productive atmosphere. There’s no way that you or Remus will be continuing to work on your essays.

His admission doesn’t surprise you; James has come to you countless times seeking assistance after making a mistake. Being best friends since you were born, you’ve grown accustomed to being the one to untangle his messes.

Your parents were best friends, which meant that you and James were also raised to be. There wasn’t a memory that you could recall that James wasn’t in. It ended up working; to both of your mum’s excitement, you and James were inseparable. As the levelheaded one between you, you often found yourself trailing after James, tasked with picking up the pieces.

It was in the aftermath of pranks spiraling out of control, times when he impulsively voiced things he really shouldn’t have, or instances when he procrastinated excessively on his work, inevitably turning to you for help with his essays. Surprisingly, it’s become almost amusing to you, a reliable routine in your friendship.

You undeniably held the title of James Potter’s best friend.

Your eyes narrow skeptically, folding your arms over your chest, “Define severely.”

His demeanor turns sheepish as he nervously rubs the back of his neck, his gaze drifting away from you. He looks incredibly uncomfortable, “I don’t think you’re going to like it.”

“You’re not starting off strong.” You snark, an amused smile finding its way onto your lips. Remus chuckles next to you.

“Y/n.” James sighs, his expression urging you to stop your teasing.

“James.” You mimic.

He shoots you a glare, eyes narrowed in mock irritation, “Lily and I were chatting, like really chatting,” He begins, sighing obnoxiously as he settles into the chair opposite you, his expression a grimace. “She told me why she hasn’t taken me seriously when I flirt with her.”

You pause, confusion etching into your features, “And where exactly did you severely fuck up?”

"She thought we were a couple." He says, his hands gesturing wildly between the two of you, his expression a mix of incredulity and amusement. "Can you believe that? You and me?”

You can believe that, actually. You and James have been mistaken for a couple more times than you can count. Even your parents were convinced the two of you would end up together. While you had told them it wasn’t going to happen, you were convinced they were still holding out hope.

You furrow your brows as you watch him a tad uneasy, “Okay, and where did you severely fuck up in this?”

“I panicked, okay?” James looks guilty when he blurts this out. He nearly shouts it, and Remus hushes him. “She said it wasn’t fair for me to flirt with her because of you. She didn’t want your feelings to be hurt and wouldn’t listen when I said we were just friends. And I panicked.”

“Mate, get to the bloody point.” Remus huffs out, tired of James dragging out the story. Nothing bothered Remus more than when James or Sirius took an eternity to get to the point of their story.

“I told her you’re dating Sirius.” James grimaces, shifting nervously.

“What?” You hiss, your palms smacking onto the table, causing James to flinch, “Have you taken too many hits to the head? James, we are not dating!”

James protests, panicking, "But Lily doesn't know that! If you two could just pretend-"

"No, absolutely not! That is going too far." You snap, sending James a frustrated look, while Remus is chuckling to himself next to you.

"Y/n, please. This could be it! My chance with Lily!" James pleads. He’s desperate to try and salvage the plan he had put all his hopes on.

"Starting your new relationship with a lie, are we?" You snap, massaging at your temples. Most of the stress is from spending too many hours studying, but James is undoubtedly making it worse.

James shrugs, a mischievous smirk starting to form, "Well, not really. You and Sirius already flirt a lot. It’s not that far off from the truth."

James was well aware of your feelings for Sirius; he had watched how you nervously stumbled over your words the first day you met Sirius. He had never seen you like that before, eyes lit up with inflation at first glance.

While he occasionally teased you about it, he understood that what you felt for Sirius was deeper than just a crush. Though you would never admit it out loud.

Your frustration grows, "It absolutely is far off from the truth. Lily probably didn’t even believe you! There's no evidence for her to believe the idea that we are together.” You cry, disbelief evident in your voice. James's casual attitude only adds to your frustration. He doesn’t seem bothered in the slightest.

Remus interjects, an amused scoff escaping him, “There's evidence to believe it."

"Are you joking?" You deadpan, your voice full of incredulity. Remus sends you a teasing smirk. He considers how Sirius flirts with you more than anyone else, but he doesn’t want to deal with Sirius furious at him.

Ever since you met Sirius, you have had a crush on him. Realistically, you knew it was pointless; Sirius had a fan club of admirers. So, you counted yourself lucky that you were one of his closest friends. Being his friend was manageable, and quite honestly, kept your expectations in check.

But Sirius acting like he had feelings for you? You wouldn’t handle that well.

James interjects, "Lily believed it. She even said she wasn't surprised."

"But she thought you and I were together?" You ask, sarcasm dripping from every word.

Your tone was snippier than you intended, but you could feel the stress building. The mere thought of pretending to be with Sirius made you feel nauseous.

"She might've just been jealous, wanting to know if you had feelings for James before she finally goes for him." Remus says casually, and James' eyes light up in excitement.

James is positively giddy as he leans forward, “You think she was jealous?”

"Does Sirius even know?" You interrupt, catching James's eye. He glances at Remus, clearly hoping to hear more about Lily’s supposed jealousy.

James shakes his head, and you scoff, opening your mouth to enlighten James on why you think this is a bad idea. Before you can say anything, Remus cuts you off, “Here’s your chance to tell him.”

You glance up to see Sirius walking through the library, and you resist letting out a lovesick sigh at how effortlessly handsome he is.

Your stomach plummets at the sight of a stunning girl effortlessly chatting with him. His laughter rings out, causing unease to settle in your stomach.

If he was close enough, you probably would’ve tried to eavesdrop.

Despite not knowing her name, you know she’s a Gryffindor; you’ve seen her in the common room. James nudges you, and when you glance at him, he sends you a knowing look.

"Glad to see you guys are having study dates without Peter and me." Sirius calls, settling into the seat next to James and patting him on the shoulder in greeting.

Relief washes over you as you notice that the girl who was with him a second ago is long gone. He glances over at you, and pauses in surprise at your disgruntled expression, "You okay?"

Remus chuckles at the question, finding the harsh look you shoot James hilarious. It’s clear that he’s finding this entire situation entertaining.

“Ask James about what he told Lily.” You say, voice strained with irritation. James sends Sirius a nervous smile, and Sirius looks at him oddly.

"What'd you do?"

Sirius asks, his eyes darting back to you, taking note of your frustrated expression. Your stomach tightens with nerves, scared of Sirius’ reaction. Remus leans back in his chair, excited to see how this will all play out.

"Lily and I were talking today," James sighs, "and she wouldn't stop going on about how she thinks Y/n is in love with me and that it's not fair for me to flirt with her because I could be hurting her."

"She thinks I'm in love with you?" You shriek, oblivious to the barely visible flinch on Sirius' face at James' words. Remus catches it, his grin getting bigger.

James ignores you, “Anyways, I said that it’s not a problem because you and Y/n are dating.” James finishes cautiously, his gaze locked on Sirius, curious for his reaction. Your breath is caught in your throat, your eyes fixed intently on Sirius, awaiting his reaction as well.

"You told Lily that Y/n's my girl?" Sirius inquires casually, causing your stomach to somersault at his words. You force yourself to focus on James instead of the warmth creeping into your skin.

"I panicked, and that's what came out. So, if you guys could pretend you're madly in love, that would be great!" James claps his hands together, and you feel the urge to wack him. You're prepared to snap at him, to explain why asking this of you both isn’t right.

But then Sirius shrugs, "Sure, shouldn't be too hard, right, sweet girl?" He says, and your legs feel like jelly.

You're floundering, not having expected Sirius to agree. He’s never maintained a steady relationship, so pretending that he’s dating you is a big ask. His agreement sends your mind spiraling with different scenarios. For a brief second, you wonder if he agrees so easily because he has feelings for you. But you quickly shut down that thought.

You’re delusional. You truly are.

"Sure, that shouldn't be too bad." You agree, hoping you appear casual about this.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

"I need you two to amp it up. Lily is eating breakfast with us today." James directs, causing you to glance up from your breakfast, disbelief etched into your features. He takes a bite of bacon and casually observes you as though his request is perfectly normal.

"We've switched spots, is that not enough for you?" You ask sarcastically, and Remus shakes his head, wearing an entertained smile as he continues eating breakfast. He can tell you're panicking about pretending to be with Sirius; it’s painfully obvious to everyone at the table.

You're usually seated between James and Peter, but when you attempted to slide into the seat this morning, James slammed his hand down on the seat and instructed you to sit next to your boyfriend, wearing a smug smile. Peter snorted softly but quickly replaced it with a sympathetic smile, silently apologizing for his reaction.

"I mean, we all know Sirius is into PDA, and you look terrified to even be sitting next to him." Peter points out, and you find yourself scrabbling.

Were you two supposed to be super affectionate? Would Sirius find it weird if you initiated it? Questions are flooding your mind leaving you feeling overwhelmed.

"I am not terrified. I just don’t know how to act." You insist.

"Act like you’re in love with him; it shouldn’t be too hard, right?" James quips, earning a glare from you. He responds with a playful wink.

"The boys are right. You need to sit closer to me.” Sirius declares as his arm slips around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You squeak his name in surprise, flustered at how easily he moves you. The boys chuckle at your bewildered expression, finding your embarrassment hilarious.

You feel disappointed when he releases you. Even more so when he doesn't pull you flush against him. Instead, your shoulder to shoulder, the distance between you both feeling more pronounced than ever.

"I'm still waiting on the PDA." Remus says with a playful smirk; his eyes are full of mischief when you glance at him.

You elbow Remus in the side, and he playfully nudges you back, causing you to bump into Sirius' side. Sirius surprises you by wrapping his arm around you, keeping you against him while playfully calling out, "Oi, back off, mate." Being pressed against his side causes warmth to spread through you as you lean further into him.

James watches as Sirius's cheeks flush, a soft smile on his face as he gazes down at you. You appear flustered but content, being so close to him, and James can't help but grin at the two of you.

"We're not going to be all over each other." You say, attempting to distract yourself from the fact that you’re pushed up against Sirius.

"Why not?" James leans forward with a grin, clearly finding everything about this entertaining. “That is what most couples do. Plus, Sirius openly flirts with everyone. But he won’t kiss his own girlfriend? It’s not believable.”

“Merlin, we should have talked about this last night.” You mumble under your breath, and Sirius chuckles beside you. He's entirely at ease. It doesn’t seem like he has any worries about pretending to be your boyfriend. With that observation, you try not to let your worries spiral out of control.

"Listen, we can do whatever you're comfortable with. If you don't want to kiss, then we don't have to," Sirius tells you gently, "but it would be sort of odd for us not to be somewhat affectionate."

The last thing he wants to do is make you feel uncomfortable. But there's a rush of exhilaration at the thought of holding you close and calling you pet names that were once off-limits. And the thought of possibly kissing you?

Surviving that would be inconceivable for him.

"You're right," You nod. “Let's just start off slow. It will be weird if we're all over each other today when we didn’t even sit together yesterday."

"Yeah, yeah! Flirt, be a little touchy, throw some cute pet names in here, will you, Sirius?" James calls out with great enthusiasm. You send him a look that you hope he understands as shut the fuck up. He doesn’t acknowledge your discomfort. Instead, he makes a heart shape with his hands, which adds to your annoyance.

Sirius presses a quick kiss to your temple, “Fuck off, mate. I know how to flirt with my girlfriend, right baby?” You freeze, your eyes widening in disbelief, while the boys laugh at your reaction. How exactly were you supposed to survive this?

You fall into a comfortable silence, happy to enjoy your breakfast as James issues his warnings to the boys, ensuring they behave themselves. Remus, with a subtle eye roll, acknowledges James's words while Peter nods emphatically in agreement. While, Sirius simply outlines every embarrassing memory he plans to share with Lily.

“Y/n, get your man in check.’ James complains in mock irritation, throwing a grape at Sirius, who dodges it.

"Good morning." Lily greets quietly. You all turn to see her approaching, her expression a mix of embarrassment and hesitance, as if she's debating whether to turn around and go to her usual spot down the table.

James abruptly stands up, his hip thumping into the table. He stifles a wince, trying to maintain his composure as he greets Lily, who tries unsuccessfully to suppress a smile at his reaction. Remus cringes and turns back to his breakfast, unable to look at James.

"Y'ready for this?" Sirius leans in, his voice lowered to a hushed tone meant only for you, effectively pulling you away from eavesdropping on James and Lily's conversation. You glance up at him, surprised to find you’re a mere inches away from him.

You're so close that you could individually count each of his eyelashes if you wanted.

You still feel the warmth of his breath mingling with yours, creating an intimate connection between the both of you.

It feels like a magnetic pull draws you closer, tempting you to tilt your head forward and touch his lips with yours. The urge to kiss him is so strong that it nearly knocks the breath from your lungs.

You clear your throat, attempting to push the thought from your mind. "I think so. We're newly dating, so don't go overboard with it." You remind him, a gentle smile playing on your lips.

“When have I ever gone overboard with anything in my life?” The smile he gives you is teasing, and it makes your heart pound to have him this close, his eyes sparkling as he smiles at you.

You hum softly in response, “I can think of quite a few times.”

His voice carries a flirtatious tone, “Can you?”

“Good morning, Lily.” Peter's gentle voice steals your attention away from Sirius. Disappointment and longing settle in his stomach as he watches you pull away and turn to greet Lily, that sweet smile now directed at her.

Lily settles between Peter and James. For a quick second, you feel a pang of jealousy because that's your spot. But when you notice James's pink cheeks and flustered expression, you forget all about it. All you want for James is for him to be happy, and having Lily near seems to do just that.

Breakfast goes smoothly. Lily fits seamlessly into your group, and you can tell it makes James giddy. He doesn't even mind not getting to talk to Lily much. He simply enjoys seeing the girl he's so hopelessly infatuated with getting along so well with his best friends.

You and Sirius aren't acting much differently than you normally do, just sitting close to each other and chatting. However, when Lily turns to you and Sirius, a wave of nervousness washes over you.

“I was so excited to hear you guys were together!”

"Oh yeah? So you can finally go for James with a clear conscience?" Sirius grins, teasing Lily, who looks thoroughly embarrassed. You nudge Sirius in the side, and he responds by giving your hip a gentle squeeze. James sends Sirius an incredulous look, which he pointedly ignores. While Remus and Peter chuckle at the playful banter.

Lily tucks a lock of hair behind her ear and clears her throat; her cheeks tinged with a hint of pink. "Uh, no, just that you two have obviously had feelings for each other for years. Everyone knew."

You're at a loss for words. Is that really what people thought? Clearly, they read you right, but you weren’t sure what to think about Sirius having feelings for you. Maybe he did, or maybe they were mistaking it for how he constantly flirted with you. But that was just how Sirius was; it didn’t necessarily mean he had romantic feelings for you.

"Haven't gotten her out of my head since the day I met her." Sirius says casually, his right elbow resting on the table as he pops a piece of bacon into his mouth. His other arm remains securely wrapped around your waist, holding you close to his side with a gentle yet firm embrace.

You look at him in shock, your eyes widening at his unexpected confession. Even the boys look slightly startled at Sirius' words, their eyes darting between you and him.

“That’s so sweet.” Lily says softly, her eyes glowing with genuine happiness as she sends you a warm smile. The sight tugs at your heartstrings but also stirs up guilt in the pit of your stomach. Lying always made you feel uneasy like a weight was pressing down on your chest.

"Sirius, I can't believe you thought that she—" Lily begins, her voice trailing off as James interjects, his interruption tinged with a hint of urgency.

"Okay, love! I think I should walk you to class, don't y' think?" James stands up from the table, extending his hand towards Lily.

Lily looks slightly confused, but she takes his hand nonetheless. As they walk away, James glances back and sends a wink in Sirius' direction. Your attention immediately shifts to Sirius, curiosity written all over your face as you’re about to ask about Lily's interrupted comment.

Sirius cuts you off before you can ask, shaking his head with a gentle smile and flushed cheeks, "Don't even bother asking; I’m not telling you what she was talking about.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

You’re curled up next to Peter on the common room couch, both of you chatting quietly together. For the last twenty minutes, he has been feeding you details about the Ravenclaw girl he has a crush on. He's sworn you to secrecy. Hoping for your advice on asking her out without enduring the teasing of the rest of the Marauders. Your gasp of excitement nearly gives away the secret, but you quickly compose yourself, offering a reassuring smile to Peter.

"Who is she?" You ask, excitement laced in your voice, but Peter sends you an apprehensive look.

"I'm going to keep that to myself. Your squeal almost let the boys know.." He teases, though his tone also carries a note of seriousness.

A laugh escapes you, "I promise when you’re ready to tell me I’ll be so careful about keeping it a secret."

"Oi! Are you two sharing secrets over there?" James calls out, his voice immensely curious. He’s sat with his back to the flickering flames, his palms flat against the floor as he leans back on them. Peter tenses beside you, but you maintain an easy smile. Remus and Sirius are lounging in the armchairs nearby, their attention piqued by the exchange.

"All my deepest darkest secrets." You tease, flashing James a grin. He furrows his brow and sits up, clearly riled up by your response.

“Y/n, as your best friend, I better know all these secrets.” James lips are pouted, his expression tinged with a hint of concern, as if he's genuinely worried that you and Peter are sharing secrets that he doesn’t know.

James has always been fiercely protective of your friendship. Despite being close to the boys, your bond with James was stronger. There was nothing that the two of you didn't confide in each other; he honestly did know all your secrets.

“You do.” You smile reassuringly, and James's expression breaks into a satisfied grin.

The boys continue their soft conversation by the crackling fire, the warm glow casting flickering shadows across the room, while you and Peter sit in comfortable silence. Both of you are lost in thought as you relax in the cozy atmosphere.

After stifling a good five yawns, you glance at the time and decide it's probably best to head to your room, the quiet of the common room signaling just how late it had gotten.

You inch closer to Peter, before finding the courage to lean over and envelop him in a friendly hug, your arms wrapping around his shoulders.

He's momentarily taken aback, his body tenses at your touch, but soon he relaxes, reciprocating by wrapping you in his arms. It's a gesture that feels somewhat out of character for you, but after he trusted you with his secret, it seems like the most natural thing to do, a silent affirmation of support for him.

"I think I'm going to go to bed." You tell him softly, "But I promise we'll talk more tomorrow."

“I’d like that.” He smiles at you as you pull away. You grab your bag and make your way in the direction of the stairs.

“Goodnight boys!” You call out softly over your shoulder before disappearing up the stairs. Sirius watches you go, his gaze lingering on your figure, his thoughts full of you long after you've left the room.

Ever since you moved to hug Peter, his eyes have been on you, curiosity and jealousy settling in his stomach.

"Why the hell did you get a hug?" Sirius asks, his tone laced with bitterness as his gaze shifts to Peter, who appears taken aback by Sirius’ sudden question. Remus and James exchange amused glances, before they refocus their attention on Peter, waiting expectantly for an explanation to ease the tension.

“I don’t know, she just hugged me.” Peter squirms uncomfortably in his seat, his confidence quickly dwindling as he's put on the spot.

Sirius nods slowly, his lips pursing in contemplation. His carefully measured tone betrays the longing and a hint of possessiveness that he struggles to conceal, "What were you guys talking about over there?"

Remus interjects with a teasing tone, "Careful, Pads. You sound jealous." A playful glint dances in his eyes as he notices Sirius' furrowed brows and the discontent on his face.

“He’s got the boyfriend role down.” James quips, and Sirius sends them both a glare.

“I’m not jealous,” Sirius repeats quite grumpily. “I just don’t understand why Peter got a hug, and we didn’t.”

James barks out a laugh while Remus shakes his head, a chuckle escaping him in sheer disbelief.

"You're jealous because you have feelings for her." James states matter-of-factly.

Sirius begins to shake his head in denial, but Remus promptly interjects, his voice firm and unwavering, "’Haven't gotten her out of my head since the day I met her.’ What the fuck was that then?” Remus repeats Sirius’ words from the other day, perfectly mimicking his tone.

James bursts into laughter, the sound hearty and infectious, while Peter offers a small smile, observing Sirius as he struggles to respond.

“Not to mention, you’ve been staring Peter down ever since Y/n touched him.” Remus remarks while Sirius gazes blankly at him, his expression unreadable as he nervously chews on his bottom lip.

“You really have.” Peter adds with a grimace.

“You like her, mate.” Remus concludes, his words carrying a sense of finality that lingers in the air.

Sirius sighs heavily.

The conversation weighs heavily on him as he sinks down in the armchair, his brow furrowed in deep thought. The boys’ words replay in his mind. He was jealous, and he did like you. He already knew all of this. But he had always been cautious around you, mindful of the unspoken boundaries because of your friendship with James. A nagging worry in the back of his mind that James would be against any relationship between the two of you. James was his greatest friend, and he worried he could lose him if he attempted to go for you. The idea of James being unfazed by a romantic relationship between you and Sirius threw him off balance. It vastly differed from the scenarios he had envisioned, where James would react with fierce anger upon learning of Sirius' affection for you. The realization left Sirius feeling torn. Did that mean he could actually go for you?

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

As the air is warm and balmy, birdsong emanating from the trees while the leaves rustle in the gentle breeze. The sun casts everything in a golden haze, letting you know summer is near. The boys are certain of their decision: today is the perfect day to spend at the lake.

Laughter and chatter echo across the shimmering waters as the boys swim around the lake, reaching where you’re draped over a soft towel next to Lily. You have been trading gossip back and forth for the last couple of hours. It’s refreshing since usually you’re glued to the boys’ sides. You were constantly in the company of at least one of the four.

You feel a twinge of regret in your chest, realizing you haven't made an effort to have a close friendship with the girls. And you really should have. It wasn't a deliberate choice; James had always been your go-to person. Then, when you met the boys, you naturally formed close bonds with them, too. The thought of branching out and making more friends never really crossed your mind.

Though you value your friendships with the boys, you decide you desperately need to spend more time with the girls. The possibility of James and Lily getting together has you hopeful.

“You realize Sirius can’t take his eyes off you, right?” You choose to remain silent, only giving a shrug, fully aware that Sirius is merely pretending to be in love with you. To his credit, he's played the part convincingly throughout the entire week. There have been moments when you've found yourself questioning the authenticity of his actions, wondering whether his affection is genuine or merely his acting skills.

For someone who hasn’t had much practice with relationships, he possessed an innate ability to treat you like you were the only girl in his world. Whether it was a reassuring hand on your lower back as you maneuvered through the crowded halls, a tender kiss planted on your forehead when you parted ways, or the subtle exchange of flirty smiles whenever your eyes met across the room.

Sirius' laughter drifts over from the lake, reaching your ears, and a subconscious smile graces your lips. Lily must have seen your reaction, “Merlin, you really like him, don’t you?”

It was driving you to the brink of obsession. If this was the experience of being Sirius' girl, you wanted it more than before.

Despite your efforts to contain it, a sigh slips from your lips, "Yeah, I really do."

Confessing this feels uncomfortable. You've never talked to anyone about the depth of your feelings for Sirius, and now you're doing so under the guise of a fake relationship. You had come close to telling James, but you really didn’t need to. He had an uncanny ability to read you like an open book. Guilt churns in your stomach once more as you think about lying to Lily. What will her reaction be when you reveal that you and Sirius were never actually together?

The silence lingers for a few moments before you gently break it, "What were you about to say at breakfast the other day? Before James interrupted?"

Lily's expression shifts from confusion to excitement, her eyes lighting up, “Oh, in Charms! I finally wrangled it out of Sirius that he had feelings for you. But he insisted that nothing was ever going to happen because you didn’t like him back.”

It feels like you've been plunged into a tub of cold water. Your mind goes momentarily blank, a surge of disbelief flooding your senses as you struggle to comprehend Lily's words. Your body freezes in place, grappling with what this could possibly mean. There’s no possible way you heard her correctly.

“What? When was this?” Your voice escapes breathless and startled, yet Lily appears oblivious to it.

“Just a couple of weeks ago! I’m so glad he finally told you how he felt.” Lily smiles sweetly before laying back on her towel. If she notices you’re in a state of shock, she doesn’t say anything.

You hear a whistle, and no surprise, your best friend throws himself between you and Lily, “Don’t you two look pretty!”

Lily gasps as James leans down, playfully pressing his lips against her cheek, his hair dripping water onto her. Though she protests, you both can tell she doesn't truly mind it.

As James and Lily become wrapped up in their own world, you find yourself drifting back to the conversation from a moment ago. Your mind spins, still muddled by Lily's words. Sirius had feelings for you. Why hadn't he spoken up? Did he not want anything to come of it?

Your heart nearly stops when Sirius drops down and hovers over you, his hands propping him up on either side of your head. You barely register that he's shirtless and above you just before icy water cascades from his hair onto your skin. A startled cry escapes you as the cold droplets trickle down your cheeks, tracing a chilling path along your neck and chest.

“Sirius Black!” You had intended to sound angry, but laughter slips past your lips, betraying your emotions. Sirius grins at your reaction, his eyes trailing down from your eyes to shamelessly check out the bikini top you have on.

The boys had been teasing him relentlessly after witnessing how he practically fell to his knees when you walked into the common room wearing a bikini top and tiny denim shorts. You were oblivious to his gaze, heading straight for Lily and conversing about who knows what.

He couldn't tear his eyes away from you all day.

He feigns ignorance as you whine at him, responding with a sweet smile instead, “What, sweet girl?”

"Get off!" You squeal, though your tone lacks any real irritation. Deep down, you’re secretly enjoying having him so close, enveloping you in his presence.

“Whatever you want, sweet girl.” He mutters as he rolls off of you, repositioning himself so he's sitting behind you. With a gentle tap on your shoulder, he prompts you to sit up, then guides you until your back hits his chest. Once you're settled, he loosely wraps his arms around your shoulders before placing a kiss on your head.

Remus catches your eye as he and Peter make their way to their towels. Unlike Sirius and James, they hadn't hurried over to you and Lily. Instead, they took their time, chatting lazily while the sun warmed their skin. Remus sends you a sly, suggestive glance, and you respond by narrowing your eyes at him playfully.

Sirius and Remus engage in their own conversation, their voices blending into the background as Peter gestures for you to follow him. Sirius protests lightly, his eyes following you as you pull away from him to walk down to the lake with Peter.

You're gone for no more than twenty minutes, offering Peter advice on establishing a friendship with the girl he likes, perhaps making it easier for him to ask her out in the future.

Despite Remus' attempts to draw him back into the conversation, Sirius remains preoccupied, his gaze fixed on you until you eventually return and settle onto the towel beside him, seeking the familiar comfort of his presence. Only then does Sirius relax, draping his arm around you protectively.

He despises the twinge of jealousy that creeps in every time Peter has you to himself.

“Mate, you’re fucked.” Remus chuckles, and you assume it's due to something amusing said during their conversation. Sirius simply rolls his eyes and playfully extends his middle finger in Remus' direction, a gesture of mock annoyance that elicits a smirk from both of them.

The rest of the afternoon is spent wrapped up in Sirius as you chat with your friends and bask in the sun.

You spend the remainder of the afternoon draped over Sirius, basking in the warmth of the sun as you chat with your friends. It's been a while since you've felt so at ease.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

After lounging by the lake all afternoon, the thought of cleaning up for a party you had little interest in attending felt like an unnecessary chore. However, after an hour of James' persistent pleading, you eventually gave in and agreed to go. You were confused about why he insisted on your presence, especially when he'd be busy spending the evening with Lily. You couldn't help but think you could have been snug in bed with a good book instead.

“How long do you think it will take before they get together?” You turn to Remus, who is leaning against the wall next to you. He wasn't thrilled about coming tonight, either. The full moon was approaching, and he could already feel the effects beginning to take hold.

You scan the bustling room, eager to catch a glimpse of James and determine Lily's proximity. Impatience simmers within you as you wait for them to get together. Their relationship seems overdue, and you’re desperate for it to happen, bringing an end to the relationship you and Sirius are forced to maintain. Though being Sirius' girlfriend has its perks, the artificiality of the situation weighs on your conscience.

After a lazy afternoon enveloped in Sirius' arms, you had returned to your room feeling unsettled. The comfort of being held by Sirius felt genuine, yet it was all fake, and that realization deeply unsettles you. The longer this relationship goes on, the more you worry about your heart being left in pieces at the end.

“Probably any day now. Why? You aren’t having fun being Sirius’ girl?” Remus asks, casting a knowing smirk in your direction. You huff and give him a playful nudge, causing his drink to slosh around in his cup. He chuckles in response, amused by your reaction.

"It's not that, and you know it." You respond, frustration evident in your tone.

Remus turns towards you, a genuine smile on his face this time, "You guys are doing quite the job of looking infatuated with each other."

You shoot him a warning look, sensing where the conversation is headed.

But Remus persists, his gaze steady, "You should consider telling him how you feel."

You scoff. "Absolutely not."

"Why not? What have you got to lose?"

You meet his gaze, incredulous, "Our friendship, for starters."

Remus shakes his head, "Do you really think Sirius would end your friendship? I doubt you could get rid of him if you tried."

You meet Remus's gaze, your brow furrowed with uncertainty, "Okay, maybe he wouldn't end our friendship. But things would definitely get awkward, and who knows where it could lead."

Remus offers a small smile, "Or it could go well. You could end up together."

You remain silent, the weight of Remus's words sinking in as you contemplate the idea of confessing your feelings to Sirius. Your stomach churns with anxiety at the mere thought of opening up to him. The fear of rejection and the potential fallout from confessing weighs heavy on your chest.

But Lily had shared with you that Sirius had opened up about his feelings for you. Maybe there was a possibility that confessing your own feelings might not be as far-fetched as you had assumed. Maybe being with Sirius wasn't entirely out of reach.

Remus observes the slight furrow in your brow as you chew on your bottom lip, a clear indication of your spiraling thoughts. The dim light of the common room highlights the unease on your face. "Do you want a drink?" He offers, his voice gentle and reassuring.

You pause, considering his offer, grateful for the distraction, "Yes, please." You respond with a small smile, the tension in your shoulders easing slightly.

As Remus leaves to fetch you a drink, you're left alone with your thoughts, the chatter and laughter of the crowded common room serving as a backdrop to your contemplation. Your eyes wander over the sea of bodies, each occupied with their own conversations and activities, creating a lively yet chaotic atmosphere.

“Y/n, hi!” You startle as Max Townsend stands beside you, his sudden presence catching you off guard. You recall being partners in Charms a couple of weeks ago, but beyond that, your interactions had been limited.

"Hey, Max." You greet with a soft smile, noticing how his shoulders relax slightly at your acknowledgment. He settles against the wall, his posture casual yet attentive, as if genuinely interested in chatting with you.

"I know we haven’t talked much since Charms, but I’ve been meaning to catch up with you." Max says, his voice earnest as he breaks the silence between you.

You're surprised by his remark, "You have?" You ask, genuine curiosity coloring your tone.

"Yeah! I enjoyed spending time with you." Max admits, his voice slightly shaky as he offers you a shy smile. You notice the faint blush coloring his cheeks, a sign of nervousness.

"I enjoyed spending time with you too! I don’t think I could have passed the last exam without your help." You respond sincerely, returning his smile with warmth. His face lights up at your words, visibly relieved.

He regains some confidence and continues, "Actually, Y/n, I was wondering if you wanted to go to Hogsmeade sometime?"

Your smile falters, and you feel a pang of guilt. You have the excuse of having a boyfriend, at least. It makes things a little easier for you. For a second, you debate if you should say yes, go on a date, and move past your feelings for Sirius. But then you think about Lily‘s words and how he might possibly like you back. Not only that but you’re supposed to be in a relationship right now.

You can't bring yourself to say yes; truth be told, you don't really want to, anyway.

"That’s really sweet of you to ask. But I’m dating Sirius." You reply though the words feel heavy on your tongue, wishing they were true.

Max looks taken aback, "Sirius Black?"

"Yes." You confirm, feeling a wave of discomfort wash over you; turning someone down is always an awkward and uncomfortable experience.

Max shakes his head, looking confused, "I didn’t know Sirius-"

"You didn’t know what, Townsend?" Sirius looks hard at him, slipping his arm around your waist and handing you a drink. "Here, baby, Rem said you wanted a drink."

You thank him quietly, settling into his side with ease. Glancing up at him, you notice Sirius isn't looking at you; his gaze is fixed on Max. His jaw clenches tightly, and his usual friendly smile is absent. The message to Max is clear: back off, she's mine.

Max looks uneasy, eyes darting from you to Sirius, “Uh, I didn’t know you and Y/n were together.”

“And why were you talking about that?”

“Uh,” Max looks at you briefly, his expression tinged with panic. He lets out a sigh, reminiscent of a child caught in the act and resigned to confessing. “I asked her out.”

Sirius' entire body tenses, his tone laced with mock curiosity, “Did you?”

He feels sick at the thought of you going on a date with another guy. Images flash through his mind – Max holding your hand on a walk through Hogsmeade, flirting with you over dinner, and the possibility of him kissing you goodnight before you head back through the portrait at the end of the night.

A surge of intense emotion floods him, an overwhelming desire to lash out, to throw a punch and convey the unmistakable message that you are off-limits.

But then the reality hits him: you're not off limits. You're perfectly single, and maybe you actually wanted to go out with Max. The realization sinks in, gnawing at him from the inside, intensifying the ache in his chest.

“But look, man, I didn’t know she was your girl! Honest.”

"Max, it's okay. Really." You interject gently, offering him a reassuring smile. Max nods frantically, clearly relieved, before hurrying off in the opposite direction and disappearing into the crowd of Gryffindors.

“What the hell was that?” You turn to Sirius, but he refuses to meet your gaze. Instead, he drops his arm from your waist and leans back against the wall, taking a long sip from his drink, his expression unreadable

“Playing the part of your boyfriend. You should go find James, he was looking for you.” His mutterings reach your ears, and your stomach clenches with irritation as hurt flashes over your features. He's never shut down before you, and it hurts your feelings deeply.

You don’t bother saying anything; instead, you scoff and walk away. Sirius’s eyes follow you the second you leave, watching as you walk away with a heavy feeling settling in his stomach.

Maybe he did need to express his feelings to you. There might be a chance that you felt the same way. And if you didn't, at least he would know and could attempt to move on from you.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“I think you need to check on Sirius.” James murmurs into your ear as you stand in the common room, waiting for Lily to join you. You're flanked by the boys, but Sirius is conspicuously absent.

You glance over at him, confused, “Why? Is he not coming down?”

“He bailed, said he isn’t feeling good.”

“He isn’t coming to Hogsmeade with us?” You all had meticulously planned your trip to Hogsmeade during the lake outing yesterday, discussing the shops you wanted to visit and the Butterbeer you couldn't wait to taste.

“Oh,” You mutter, “I’ll check on him and catch up with you guys then.”

You still harbor concern for his well-being, a lingering sense of care that remains despite the the frustration you feel about last night. You ascend the stairs, faintly catching Peter's inquiry about your destination and James' response that you won't be joining them anymore. You contemplate turning around, half-tempted to inquire with James about his statement, but decided against it, choosing not to waste your energy.

You're so deeply immersed in your thoughts as you walk through the hall that you don't even notice the sound at first.

The muffled noise filtering through the boys' dorm door catches your attention, causing you to pause in front of the door. You briefly entertain the idea that Sirius might be genuinely unwell, but skepticism lingers in your mind. The persistent groans don't quite fit the pattern of someone who's just sick.

You were on the verge of turning around, genuinely considering it, until you caught a muffled moan that distinctly sounded like your name.

You pause, questioning the authenticity of what you just heard, wondering if it was a figment of your imagination or if you truly heard your name. But then you hear it, “Fuck, Y/n. Feels so good.”

Your legs turn to jelly, the words coursing through your veins like an electric shock, leaving you feeling stunned and breathless.

Without a second thought or even a plan forming in your mind, you find yourself knocking on the door. Inside, you hear a muffled curse followed by shuffling before Sirius swings the door open nearly a minute later, clad only in pajama pants. His hair is tousled, his cheeks flushed, and he's breathing heavily. The surprise on his face is evident as he takes in your unexpected presence.

“What were you just doing?” Your words spill out more confrontationally than you intended, catching Sirius off guard. The surprise flickers across his face, evident in how his eyebrows knit together and his eyes widen slightly.

“Uh, I-” He glances back into his room, searching for a believable excuse among his belongings. Flustered, he struggles to come up with a convincing lie.

"Sirius," You press, and his eyes flicker back to you. He appears guilty, aware that you've caught on. "I just heard you." You add, your tone that is firm but not accusatory.

“Merlin, Y/n. I’m sorry I-” He stammers, his heart sinking into the pit of his stomach at the mere thought of you possibly feeling disgusted with him or worse, refusing to remain his friend because of what he’s just done.

“What were you thinking about?” You ask instead, taking a deliberate step closer to him. The room feels charged with tension, and you can sense Sirius's unease. His breath hitches as your presence draws nearer, his eyes flickering with a mix of apprehension and anticipation.

He glances over your shoulder, his gaze flicking to the empty hallway outside before he answers, “You.”

“Me?” You take a tentative step closer, your voice barely a whisper compared to before, its tone huskier, laden with curiosity and perhaps a hint of intrigue. You fix him with a daring look, a glint of challenge in your eye, as if silently daring him to take action.

He remains silent, his gaze fixed on you for a fleeting moment before he takes action, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the dorm without a word.

As soon as the door shuts, he presses you against the door, his movements swift and urgent. You let out a gasp in surprise, feeling the sudden shift in atmosphere as Sirius's intensity envelops you. His eyes, usually filled with mischief, now bore into yours with a mixture of seriousness and vulnerability.

“Y/n. Why did you knock on the door?”

You don’t answer at first, your eyes locked with his for a few heartbeats before you let out a sigh, “Because I heard you say my name, and now I know you want me the same way that I’ve always wanted you.”

Sirius doesn’t hesitate, his lips meeting yours with a sense of urgency that sends a shiver down your spine. The moment his touch connects with yours, you exhale softly, feeling the warmth of his lips against yours. With gentle pressure, you draw him closer, your arms wrapping around his shoulders while Sirius’ embrace envelops you, pulling you closer as if he never wants to let go.

He initiates with a tender kiss on your lips, then gently nibbles on your bottom lip, eliciting a gasp. Seizing the opportunity of your parted lips, he intensifies the kiss, pressing forcefully into your mouth. Sirius kisses you as if each moment is the first and last time, molding you into pliancy. You willingly surrender, allowing him to kiss you into a state of blissful oblivion.

As he withdraws, a soft whimper escapes your lips in protest. He casts a questioning glance your way as he lifts the hem of your shirt, and you respond with a nod of affirmation. Slowly, he peels it off of you and lets it drop at your feet. Shamelessly, he admires your breasts and how they sit so pretty in your black bra. For a moment, the thought of apologizing for the simple garment crosses your mind, but the way his gaze lingers on you halts any inclination to do so.

He leans down, pressing kisses and nipping at the exposed skin on your neck and trailing his way down to your chest. It steals your breath away, prompting you to weave your fingers through his hair as you tilt your head back, reveling in the sensation. He's murmuring praises against your skin, ranting about how beautiful you are, how sweet your moans are, and how you drive him crazy. Your heart pounds within your chest, and for an instant, you fear its thunderous rhythm might betray you, considering how near he stands.

“Take it off.” In a hushed tone, you speak, prompting Sirius's gaze to swiftly rise and lock with yours.

He encircles you with his arms, quickly undoing your bra, and you deftly push the straps down, allowing the garment to cascade down, unveiling your skin. Swiftly, you toss it into the growing pile that appears to be taking shape by the door.

Sirius gazes intently, his bottom lip captured between his teeth, and a subtle furrow forms between his eyebrows, “Fucking hell, y’have the prettiest tits I’ve ever seen.”

Before you can utter a word, his mouth is on your breasts. Pressing the softest kisses onto your nipple before gently biting it, causing your breath to hitch. He bends down, mirroring the gesture with the other one.

His hands, possessively grip at your hips, act as anchors, momentarily keeping you in place. However, a growing restlessness takes hold, and you start to squirm, a subtle plea for more of his attention. Silently comprehending your unspoken desire, he wordlessly responds. A gentle tug on your hand is all the communication needed, and without a moment's hesitation, you obediently follow his lead.

Guiding you, he directs you to settle onto his bed, a silent request you readily heed. Your legs dangle over the edge of the bed as you rely on your elbows to bear all your weight.

Sirius kneels in front of you, easily slipping off both of your shoes and tossing them to the side. He reaches up, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your skirt before tugging it down and off of your legs. You’re left in a pair of gray panties that easily show how soaked you are for him.

He pushes on your knees until your legs are completely spread for him, and he can get a clear view of your soaked underwear. A hushed curse escapes his lips, the words slipping out quietly as his gaze lingers on you.

“You’re fucking stunning. I don’t know what I did to deserve this. To deserve you.” You bask in his words, your body thrumming with warmth and delight as his sweet sentiments wash over you.

He glances up at you, and he nearly loses it right then and there. You’re watching him through hooded eyes, your pupils dilated wide, a silent reflection of your anticipation and desire. He doubts he could ever erase the image of the way you're gazing at him, etching it into his memory with the fervent wish to witness it for the rest of his days.

He caresses his hands along your thighs, fingers gently squeezing and kneading with each pass. Occasionally, he leans down, planting tender kisses on your sensitive skin, each one a whispered promise of affection. The closer he gets to your core, the more you squirm and let out soft whimpers.

“Can I take your panties off?” He asks, glancing up at you from between your thighs. The pad of his thumb brushes against your clit, and you jolt in surprise.

A gasp escapes your lips as you're overtaken by the sensation, yet swiftly, you find yourself nodding frantically in response, “Please.”

Overrun with desperation, Sirius pulls at them with such fervor that they nearly tear as he tugs them off. You can't help but giggle at his fervor, amused by his frantic actions and the unmistakable look of pure desire written across his face. He wouldn't be surprised if he was drooling, staring the sight of your glistening pussy.

“I want to be inside of you.” He declares, standing up from the floor, leaning over you to firmly grasp your jaw before capturing your lips in a heady, intoxicating kiss. The moan that escapes you sounds so foreign, so unlike yourself, that it catches you by surprise, leaving you momentarily taken aback. You don't bother vying for dominance, allowing him to take control of the kiss. He withdraws from you leaving your chest heaving and breaths coming in ragged gasps.

“Take your pants off.” You demand, reaching desperately for the band of his pajamas to shove them off. Sirius beats you to the task, swiftly shoving them off himself in a display of impatience.

“Sirius.” Drool pools in your mouth at the sight of him. Long, thick, and pretty. Your lips part slightly, and you look up at Sirius in surprise, caught off guard by him. For a fleeting moment, you sit there, eyes locked, contemplating whether you'll be able to take him or not. He’s bigger than anyone you have ever been with before.

Sirius doesn’t let you stare for too long before his fingers are sliding through your soaked folds and brushing over your clit. Whimpers and moans tumble past your lips as Sirius rubs firm circles over you to get you adjusted before dipping down and pressing two fingers into you. A cry escapes you at the intrusion, and your hand instinctively reaches down to grip his bicep firmly.

Sirius startles you by leaning down and pressing the softest kiss to your clit, before licking you the bundle of nerves softly. Your body tenses with pleasure, hands gripping the sheets beneath you.

“I’ve always wanted to taste you.” He confesses a surge of heat courses through your body, igniting every nerve ending as you absorb his words. He doesn’t waste another second before leaning down and gently sucking on your clit.

"Please don't stop." You plead softly, and Sirius complies, continuing with unwavering determination. He nips and sucks, licking through your folds and holding your thighs open for him. His fingers continue to slide in and out of you; the sounds you’re making are obscene.

You’re struck by the thojught that this doesn't compare to any other times that you’ve been eaten out. But maybe it's not just his technique that feels good; it might be the fact that its Sirius who’s between your legs.

Your thighs tremble, and a euphoric sensation begins to build up in your stomach, making it feel like you are floating on a delightful high.

“Sirius, I need you.” You gasp sharply, your fingers instinctively tugging on his hair, signaling for him to ease up. You wanted to come together for your first time, as cheesy as it may have been.

As he rises to his feet, your eyes meet, and contagious, goofy smiles spread across both of your faces. In this shared moment, a mutual understanding passes between you—acknowledging the absurdity of the situation yet reveling in the fact that there's nowhere else you'd rather be.

You watch as he wraps his hand around himself, dragging his hand up and down a few times. He whispers for you to scoot back until your head rests against the pillow, and with a gentle nod, you comply. He follows suit, settling on his haunches before you, creating a comforting, intimate space between you both.

“Y’ready?” He asks in a hushed tone, leaning in to hover over you, and at that moment, a rush of memories floods your mind, reminiscent of yesterday by the lake. You're convinced you must look rather pathetic with the speed of your nod, but Sirius only responds with a sweet smile.

With a grip on his cock, he slides the tip through your slick, both of you sucking in a breath at the sensation. He gently pushes at your entrance. Sirius steals a glance up at you, silently seeking reassurance, and you respond with a simple nod and a warm smile, letting him know that everything is perfect. Sirius catches you off guard as he leans down, tenderly pressing the gentlest of kisses to your lips, a gesture filled with unexpected sweetness.

His gaze shifts, watching as he pushes his cock inside of you, letting out a string of curses as your pussy grips him tight, pulling him deeper inside.

“Fuck,” Gritting his teeth, he squeezes his eyes shut, breathing deeply through his nose, determined to regain control and prevent himself from losing composure. He’s sitting fully inside you, and he has to take a breather because you feel better than he could have ever imagined. The last thing he wants is for this to end as soon as it begins.

His voice sounds utterly shattered, “You’re so wet, fuck.”

You entwine your fingers in his hair, feeling the soft strands between your fingertips as you pull him closer, urging him to meet your lips with his own. The anticipation builds as his warm breath mingles with yours, creating an intimate connection before the gentle press of his lips against yours. Parting your lips, you deepen the kiss, and Sirius eagerly reciprocated.

“Sirius. Fuck me, please.” You exhale softly against his lips, and Sirius responds with a low, guttural groan of longing and desire.

He doesn’t waste any time before dragging his cock along the sensitive walls of your pussy, before thrusting back into you, “God, your pussy feels incredible.” The cry that escapes you resonates loudly in the room, and you're immensely grateful that everyone is out at Hogsmeade. The absence of others allows you the freedom to be as uninhibited as you are, knowing that the full dorms would never afford you the same level of privacy and volume.

“Feels so good.” You gasp, head rolling to the side, your cheek resting against the pillows. Sirius’ hands rest against the back of your thighs, holding your legs against your chest, giving a clear view of the way his cock is so seamlessly slipping inside of you.

He watches you, transfixed on the way your brows pinch together in pleasure, lips parting to let moans slip past. It's as if a dam has burst within Sirius, an unstoppable torrent of words and emotions pouring forth as he finds himself unable to contain everything he's been holding back.

“Fuck, you sound s’pretty, sweet girl,” The groan that leaves his lips is downright sinful. “Thought about this pretty pussy all day. Pretended to be sick just to get off to the thought of you.”

“Sirius.” You whine, reaching out to thread your fingers through his hair and pull him down to you. You’re soaked and aching, desperate for Sirius to fuck you faster. However, much to your disappointment, he remains insistent on maintaining a slow, teasing pace.

“Pictured, tugging that fucking bikini top down. Watching your tits bounce while I fuck you. Fuck, cumming all over them.” The whine that escapes you feels pathetic, and under different circumstances, you would've been embarrassed by it. However, given the situation you're in, embarrassment takes a backseat.

“I know, baby. I know.” He complies, adjusting his position so that his right arm supports him above you while his left hand gently traces your skin. Brushing over your nipples, trailing up and over your tits, before placing his hand loosely around the base of your throat.

“You’re fucking perfect,” He grunts, admiring how ruined you look for him. Your mascara smudged beneath your eyes from tears, and your lips swollen from his earlier kisses. He loved seeing you like this. Being the one to ruin you, to smudge your makeup and bring you to tears. “Taking my cock s’well.”

You’re incoherent, begging for Sirius to go harder, to fuck you faster. Hands pawing at his ass, desperately trying to bring him closer.

His hand squeezes your throat gently, “Tell me you want me to fuck you harder. C’mon love, wanna hear you beg for it.”

A smug grin tugs on Sirius’ lips as he watches you struggling to form words. You’re getting close if the way you’re squeezing him so tight and rolling your hips is any indicator.

But then a desperate, needy whine with the words he so badly wants to hear slips past your lips. Babbling about needing his cock and wanting him to ruin you. The second he hears your pleas, he thrusts into you harder, setting a brutal new pace that has you crying for him.

“I’ll give you anything you ask for, m’love.” He speaks so sincerely that you feel a surge of emotions welling up inside, an overwhelming urge threatening to bring tears to your eyes.

Overcome with your emotions, you reach for Sirius’ hand and interlace them together before Sirius presses your clasped hands into the sheets. His headboard thumps against the wall rhythmically.

“Need you to fill me up. Please.” You plead desperately, and Sirius curses, his voice rough and strained.

“Shit, that’s my girl. Want me to fill you with my cum?” It's the praise that pushes you over the edge. Your back arches, pressing your breasts into Sirius’ chest and your legs tremble.

“Doing so good f’me.” He’s close behind you. Your tight, wet walls clenching around him is what does it for him.

“Fuck, baby. Gonna cum. Fuck.” Sirius moans, burying his head in the crook of your neck as his hips stutter and you cry out at the feeling of his warm cum filling you up. You clench his hand tightly, your nails likely leaving imprints on his skin. A sob escapes your lips, and your fingers weave through his hair, a desperate attempt to draw him closer.

You both remain entwined, lost in each other's embrace as you gradually come down from the euphoric highs. The room resonates with the sound of your intertwined breaths, each one heavy and labored. Your body feels utterly slack, every muscle loosened, and you're so relaxed that you could easily doze off at any moment.

Sirius presses a couple of tender kisses against your neck, eliciting a satisfied hum from you. When he withdraws from you, a wince escapes you as you feel the separation, and Sirius’ eyes dart up to you in concern.

“Y’okay, sweet girl?”

“I’m okay, just sore.” You grace him with a sweet smile, and Sirius leans in, gently pressing a tender kiss to your forehead.

“Gonna get a towel, one second.” He assures you, rising from the bed and disappearing into the bathroom. You listen to the faucet running and the faint sounds of the cupboard opening and closing. Lying back, you gaze up at the ceiling, absently nibbling on your thumbnail until a smile breaks across your face at the thought of what just happened.

“Here, love.” Sirius says, sitting on the edge of the bed holding a washcloth in his hand. He’s got a fresh pair of pajama pants on, you didn’t even notice him grab clothes from his trunk, too lost in your thoughts.

Sirius gently grips your ankle, encouraging you to spread your legs. His breath hitches at the sight of his cum dripping out of you and onto his sheets, desperately hoping to see this sight again. He murmurs a curse under his breath, his touch gentle as he delicately uses the warm washcloth to clean between your thighs.

“There.” He whispers softly before aiding you to sit up. As you glance over, you notice the t-shirt and pajama pants laid out beside him, meant for you. Your heart swells with warmth as he assists you in slipping it over your head. With a grateful smile, you slide into the pajama pants. Meanwhile, Sirius utters evanesco to fix the sheets up, before joining you in bed.

“C’mere.” He beckons to you, sinking into the pillows, and you nestle against him, finding solace as you rest your head on his chest.

In the silence, you both relish the comfort of each other's embrace, enveloped in a cocoon of intimacy. Lost in contemplation, your mind wanders, grappling with what just happened and what that meant for the both of you.

"That wasn't just a one-time thing, was it?" You inquire, the hopefulness evident in your tone.

"No," Sirius responds, tilting your chin so you can meet his gaze. "I want you to be mine, for real this time."

The fluttering butterflies that dance through your stomach are overwhelming as you absorb his words. A lovesick grin spreads across your lips, unable to contain the rush of emotions coursing through you, “Then I'm all yours."

You settle back into Sirius, and his arms hold you against him. The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest beneath your head lull you into a serene state, the sound of his steady heartbeat serving as a soothing lullaby that guides you into a peaceful sleep.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

"I'm sorry, so you asked us to fake it not for Lily, but for Sirius and I to get together?" You gaze at James, confused, knitting your brows, while he sits opposite you at the table. Remus and Sirius are absorbed in their own conversation, and Peter is having breakfast with the girl he harbors a crush on. Despite their current status as friends, Peter seems overjoyed nonetheless.

James grins, casting you a smug look. "I mean, Lily genuinely thought you and I were a thing. At first, it really was because Lily thought we were together, but then I realized that this was the perfect way to get you and Sirius together.”

“James! So you lied to us?” You huff in disbelief.

James shrugs nonchalantly, his demeanor radiating an air of casual indifference, “You already knew I lied to Lily; what’s the difference?”

You sigh softly, "That's true, but what about you and Lily? Are you two getting together?"

James smiles, “We’ll get there eventually. This was more about you and Sirius. And before you start, yes, I’ll tell her the truth.” He sends you a pointed look, and you chuckle, already preparing to remind him to come clean to Lily.

"You're certifiably insane." You tease, exhaling a laugh.

“Well, it worked, didn’t it? You got the guy.” James watches with delight as a lovesick smile effortlessly graces your face before you steal a glance at Sirius.

"Oh, hey. Pick up your clothes next time you're napping with Sirius," He remarks casually, but the emphasis on the word napping lets you know that he's fully aware there was more happening than just sleep. "My shoe got tangled in your bra."

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