#especially since we haven't been friends for even a whole year. but like. I feel closer to them than I've ever felt to anyone ever

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Well damn, today did not go how I expected

[electricfied-wolf]

I think that I deserve to meet my friends in like every single life ever. If I do not fucking meet my train friends in the next life whats the point those guys are like everything. We've gotta be able to meet in every life it cant just be this one bc you're literally the funniest and coolest person ever. Hell I feel that way about ALL of my friends actually. You watch me play five nights and freddy's and refuse to play the 2nd night because I got too scared. You stayed up with me all night because I didn't want to sleep and then I fell asleep within a minute of talking to you. We laughed and joked. We understand each other in ways nobody does but also hardly know each other. The longest I've known any of you is since late march of this year. But I would literally not want to be here if I didn't have you. Idk what the fuck the universe put in our friendship that made us this close this quick but god I'm glad its there.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

It's Hard to Believe | Jungkook One Shot

Summary: Getting pregnant with your best friend's baby definetly wasn't a part of the plan... Pairing: f!Reader x Jungkook (fwb, f2l) Word Count: 2.7k Warnings: A tiny bit of explicit and suggestive language but nothing crazy a/n: This is something I started writing at like midnight and it's kinda shit but I thought I might as well post it since I haven't posted in a while (Like five days short of a month wtf?!?!? How has it been that long?!?!) (I just barely checked rn lmao my bad 🥲) p.s. I kinda wanna do a full on series on a concept like this but it'll be different and less fluffy but that won't be happening for a long ass time but yeah lol Requested by a lovely anon 💜

"How am I supposed to tell him?" I ask my friend Sam for the millionth time since I found out. "Y/n just tell him. You guys have been friends for how long?" she asks and it's like I'm having deja vu from both of our responses. "Like ten years" I mumble and pull my sweatshirt sleeves down over my hands in an effort to stop my nervous fiddling but it only makes it worse. 

"Right and you guys have been messing around with each other for over a year now, maybe even more...I don't wanna know" she says while holding her hand up in a way to assure me that she doesn't need the details. "Just tell him. If he's as great of a guy as you keep on telling me he is then I promise everything will be okay" she says and places a hand on my shoulder before she gets up off my couch. 

"Where are you going?" I ask while she shrugs on her jacket. "Didn't you say he's supposed to be here around five?" she asks and I nod my head, checking the clock and seeing that it's already 4:30. 

"Yeah...are you sure you don't wanna stay and say hi?" I ask and she glares at me. "Let me know what his response is to that bun in the oven and then we'll talk. I wanna figure out if he's an asshole or not before I decide to waste anytime on him" she says while lacing up her shoes. 

"Promise me you'll tell him tonight?" she asks and lifts up her hood, getting ready to shield herself from the pouring rain outside. I nod my head reluctantly, that being way more progress than I've made for the past few weeks since I found out. "I promise" I utter under my breath and she smiles, pulling me in for a bone crushing hug. 

"Text me if you need me" she says, worried for what might happen but hoping for the best. "I will...thanks" I whisper and she nods her head before walking out of my door and turning slightly and waving to offer me one last farewell.

I close the door after I see her get into her car and lean my back up against it, steadying myself for a second and taking deep breaths, trying to stop my racing heartbeat before pushing off of it and tidying up before Jungkook gets here to distract myself. 

Sam has been the only one I've been able to count on and honestly the only person I can trust since I haven't told anyone else. She was the one I called when I missed my period and she's the one who brought me a pregnancy test...and then when out and bought me ten more because I couldn't actually grasp the concept that I was pregnant...am pregnant.

Jungkook and I have always been careful and taken all the necessary steps to keep this from happening but I guess we got careless this time. 

Through out this whole arrangement we've made it very clear to each other that we're not sleeping with anyone else but neither of us are looking for any sort of commitment either so that's why this has gone on for so long. 

Like it or not though we're going to be committed to each other in one way or another no matter what because I'm keeping this baby. No matter what he says I'm keeping them. 

Jungkook is my best friend, the one person who has been there for me through everything. He's seen me at all of my highest highs and especially at my lowest lows and no matter what he's never made me feel shitty about it. I know he's not the kind of guy that'll turn on you because of something like this but I can't help but still feel terrified. 

This wasn't supposed to happen but even if this child wasn't made with love from his side...it was made with love from mine. 

I don't know how long it's been since I fell in love with him but I know I shouldn't have said yes to this whole fuck buddy ordeal. I just couldn't stand the thought of him being with someone else so when he offered up the idea I said yes.

I figured that if this was a way to prevent him from getting his heart broken by all those sorry excuses of girlfriends he's had in the past then I guess I'll be okay with breaking mine.

He's been acting different lately though. He's been a lot touchier, asking to come over more often, going out of his way to help me with things, offering to feed me all the time and all of it is making me feel like he already knows. 

Does he know? Have I started showing already? I haven't really noticed a difference in my body yet but he looks at me naked a lot more often than I pay attention to myself naked so I mean I guess he could've noticed right? 

Only one way to find out though...

A half an hour later I hear him take out his keys and unlock my door and soon I'm greeted with a smile that tugs at my heartstrings. 

"Hi baby" he says, using that pet name he's become very fond of since this whole ordeal started. The sound of it after finding out I'm pregnant with his baby has made me a little uncomfortable though since I haven't told him yet. 

Don't get me wrong I love it when he calls me that but I can't help but think that if this goes south that he won't ever call me that again. 

Maybe the hormones have started to scramble my brain already because those uncomfortable feelings are quickly thrown away when I take in the sight of him after he shrugs off his rain coat. A simple black baggy hoodie and jeans engulf his form and the comfy sight just makes me want to curl up in bed with him and forget about everything and everyone.

Just him and I, it's always been him and I. I just don't know if this little one is going to change things. 

I place a hand on my stomach for a second as a way to gain some strength from my itty bitty baby before finally working up the courage to greet him.

"Hi" I greet him softly, walking over to where he's stopped to take off his shoes and when he looks back up at me he smiles again and kisses me. I sigh into it, savoring it for just a little bit longer and when it finally breaks he looks down at me with concern now written all over his face. 

"Are you okay?" he asks, sensing that something's off right away from the just the small change in the way I kissed him. I hesitate for a second then simply hold out my hand for him to take and he does, following behind me as I lead him over to my couch. 

Getting this over with sooner rather than later is my best option right now so there's no reason to delay. 

He needs to know, he deserves to know.

We sit there in silence, longer than he would like us to since I can tell how tense his body has gotten in a matter of minutes. "Y/n you're scaring me" he whispers, not wanting to pressure me but relaying his feelings. 

I take a couple more deep breaths before finally starting. "I need you to listen to me and I need you to please not speak until I'm finished" I say while looking down at my lap, not being able to meet his eyes. 

He murmurs a soft 'okay' and waits for me to continue, taking one of my hands and placing it in his lap. He needs some form of physical contact to keep him grounded since he's not too sure what to expect and I let him, knowing I need some reassurance too. 

Even if I don't know what his reaction is gonna be, in this moment I need it more than ever.

"I guess there's really no right way to go about saying this because this wasn't supposed to happen so I'm just gonna come out and say it..." I start off and he squeezes my hand, encouraging me to keep going. 

"I missed my period...over a month ago...and I haven't had it since then" I say and finally look up at him where he has an unsure expression. It's not one that's mad or disappointed with what I've said thus far which is a good thing but more like he's trying hard to hold himself back so he can keep that promise. 

His hold on my hand hasn't loosened, in fact it's gotten even tighter and that gives me hope that we'll work this out so I take another deep breath before continuing. 

"I tried to kid myself into thinking that it was late but when another week passed by I got nervous. I asked Sam to get me a test and it came out positive. I didn't believe it and thought it was a false positive and so to ease my mind she went a bought ten more from a bunch of different brands and...all of them came out positive" I say and he still looks at me with that same expression, waiting for me to give him the okay to speak and so I do. 

"How long have you known?" are the first words out of his mouth and although they're not negative they aren't necessarily positive either. "About a month now" I say and he nods his head, taking another second or two to formulate what he's gonna say next. 

"I'll support you no matter what you decide" he says and I let out a breath I didn't even know I had been holding in. "I wanna keep it" I say and he nods his head and smiles softly at first and then as the seconds go by it gets wider and wider making my heart beat faster. 

"Am I allowed to get excited now?" he whispers and I can't help but chuckle as tears start to prickle my eyes and give him a nod. "You're excited?" I say, my whole being slowly overcome with emotion. 

"How could I not be?" he scoffs playfully but that answer has me confused. "But Jungkook we're not together. I mean we're not in a relationship, we're just friends" I explain and there's a playful glint in his eyes after I say that that's making me even more nervous.

"You wanna know what I thought you were gonna tell me?" he offers up, slightly changing topics but I look at him in a way to urge him to continue. "I thought you were gonna break up with me" he says and I smile, "Jungkook we're not together. How could I break up with you?" I chuckle in disbelief. 

"Correction, I thought you were gonna break up with me before I even got the chance to ask you to be my girlfriend" he says with a grin and my jaw drops, the dots all connecting as to why he's been acting so different lately. "You were gonna ask me to be your girlfriend?" I utter quietly as if we were in a crowed room and I had a secret for just the two of us.

"I had actually planned on asking you tonight" he explains, walking over to where he had placed his backpack on the floor, taking out a bouquet of slightly squished flowers. "Sorry they're all beat up. I forgot and rode my bike over here so I didn't really have any other option but to put them in there" he says almost as if he was nervous, rubbing the back of his neck and it's then that I notice how pink his ears have gotten. 

He is nervous

I take them from him and smile, waiting for him to say it but he simply stands there and admires me and I can't help but laugh. "What so funny? I told you what happened to them" he utters through pouty lips which only makes me laugh more. "No, no it's not the flowers it's just that...don't you have something to say?" I ask, calming down my chuckles and when he looks at me with the same confused expression I have to try my hardest to keep the laughter at bay. 

"Do you have something you would like to ask me Jungkook" I rephrase it and after a second his lips go from a pout to the shape of an 'O' as he's figured it out. "Oh um, yeah, right. Well I um" he starts off, rubbing the back of his neck again while stuttering and trying to find the words and after struggling for a second I decide to poke fun at him again. 

"Jungkook I am literally carrying your child and you're too afraid to ask me to be your girlfriend?" I laugh, giving him a slight reality check which he scoffs at before responding. 

"I was trying to remember what I had rehearsed to say to you but now that you're being a little brat I guess you'll never get to know all the nice things I was gonna say" he retorts, his voice suddenly taking on a darker tone that sends a shiver through my body and he smirks when he sees my reaction to it. 

He cups my face and rubs his thumb along my bottom lip, making them part and he leans in as if he was going to kiss me but stops just shy of my lips. "Will you be my girlfriend?" he whispers, nudging his nose against mine and making me smile. 

"I'll have to think about that" I play coy with him which he chuckles at. "You know if you weren't pregnant right now I would have thrown you over my lap for that smart mouth" he warns and I smile before leaning in and kissing him for just a second before pulling back. 

"Yes I'll be your girlfriend" I say and nudge my nose against his as well and before I can register it my back is on the couch and his lips are pressed against mine, the kiss not rushed but full of so many words that have yet to be said and he gives in, not being able to hold it in anymore.

"I love you" he says, pulling back and looking down at me to see my expression which is completely dumbfounded to say the least. "You what?" I ask and he chuckles, "Is it really that hard to believe?" he points out and I guess now that I think about it it really isn't.

"I guess we've both been in love with each other for a while now huh?" I smile and his eyes light up at my round about confession. "Say it" he says, and I can feel my cheeks heating up. I hadn't planned on actually saying those three words to him even though I've felt them for so long but I don't want to hold them back anymore. 

"I love you" I whisper and he smiles, "Say it again" he repeats, clearly not believing it just yet. "I love you Jungkook" I say and the little switch up with attaching his name to the end darkens his gaze. "I guess there's no chance in me getting you pregnant a second time right now huh?" he asks, sliding his hand up my thigh and I giggle. 

"No I think that's pretty much impossible but the odds are never zero" I say and he rolls his eyes. "I'm trying to tell you that I wanna hit it raw" he states the obvious while rolling his eyes. "I know I know...and the answer is yes Daddy" I tease, testing to see how that word affects him now that he knows.

He tongues his cheek at that making me bite my lip, knowing that's gonna be even more of a trigger word for him from now on. "Daddy huh? Well I guess that title is a little more fitting now isn't it?" 

Taglist: @jkslipppiercing @trina864 @kaitieskidmore97 @goddesofimortality @coolbluedude @coralmusicblaze @whoa-jo @00frenchfries00 @pastelpinkjoon @joonwater (Rest of the tags will be done in the reblogs 💜)

Join my Taglist!

Feel free to fill out the form or just comment on any of my fics to be added :)

[strwberri-milk]

Hello!! Sorry if this is lengthy but can you please do a "I didn't know we were dating." Scenario/HC where MC/reader didn't know that they were already dating the LaDS guys meanwhile the guys have been preparing to celebrate their 1 year anniversary together and reader/MC is confused because they thought that the LaDS guys were just being close and affectionate cause they were good friends and the LaDS men are like "We've been together this whole time!"? (And this whole time MC has been pining for them but they thought their feelings were one sided)

Please feel free to ignore/delete this if it's too lengthy 😅

hhhh im modifying this to a few months bc tbh i dont see any of the boys going that long without making some sort of clarifying statement that makes it clear you two are dating we love kings of communcation <3

Zayne was always warmer with you than anybody else. You never thought of it as anything other than platonic, especially considering you've overheard him talking to his colleagues about needing to see his partner or bringing something over the next time he sees them. You never asked him about it since he never seemed to say anything about them to you, thinking that he was just wanting to keep his relationship private.

It's not until one day when you hear him on the phone use your name in conjunction with calling you his partner that you think to ask him. You wait for him to finish his call, asking him what he meant by that. He's just as confused, asking if the two of you were dating. He'd thought you were since you never said anything to the contrary and seemed just as happy to spend time with him. You have to finally admit to him that you had no idea, the two of you laughing awkwardly at the assumption that was made. You end up making things official, finally going on your actual first date the same day.

Xavier was always all over you. You thought it was because he didn't really seem to have many friends outside of yourself, not minding it at all since you liked him just as much, if not more. You don't think to ask why he feels so comfortable around you, knowing that honestly, you felt just as comfortable around him yourself. Not only that, but since you had feelings for him allowing him to be as touchy as he was allowed you to fantasize about the two of you being more.

One day he tells you he loves you out of the blue, making you a flustered mess. You cover your face, trying desperately to hide and ask him why he's suddenly saying all that, only to be attacked with the fact that he's asking why you haven't said it back. He looks sad, asking if you don't love him and your relationship wasn't as serious as he thought it was. You ask him what relationship, leading to you finding out that he thought you said yes to being his partner when he asked you after a sleepover one morning. It's a little mortifying but you don't mind now that you know, hugging him tightly and telling him that you love him more than anything.

Rafayel has always been nice to you, practically crawling into your lap whenever the two of you are hanging out. He loves to hold you, burying his face into your neck and saying the sweetest things - the exact opposite of the man he presents himself to be. You just assumed that him being this needy was a reflection of how comfortable he is with you, totally unaware that he was trying to figure out how to make your first kiss perfect.

He invites you over for dinner - an occurrence that was becoming more and more common - fully intent on making a move on you tonight. You thank him for the meal, totally panicking when you realise he's a lot closer to you today then he is other days when he comes over to grab your finished plate. He's about to kiss you when you push against his chest, asking him what he's trying to do.

He's just ask confused, asking why he can't kiss his partner, which then makes you spiral even more. You tell him that the two of you aren't dating, which just makes him even more confused. Cue a conversation about the fact that he thought you two were dating and he was trying to kiss you because he wanted to. He wins in the end but your heart definitely stopped a few times from th excitement of the evening.

Sylus straight up calls you his partner to your face. You thought it was just a new pet name he was testing out on you, not taking it seriously. He calls you so many pet names that you almost tune them out, thinking that the affectionate way he looks at you was just a side effect from him teasing you slightly.

It's not until you hear the twins referring to you by the pet names teasingly in Sylus' presence that you start to think that maybe there's something to it. He tells them that he can call you whatever he likes because you're dating him and that if you didn't like it you would have said something already. He doesn't know you're listening in, nor that you're freaking out because you had no idea that you two were dating.

Now he ends up needing to tell you that you two have been dating for a while as far as he's concerned. He tells you that he thought he made it clear with the fact that he told you to your face that he considers you his partner, blaming you (playfully) for being too dense to realise he was serious.

[inafever]

On how much Aziraphale has learned since season one:

This is about character development. Inside of a story, everything that happens, happens for a reason. It's meant to tell you something, to teach you or the character of your story, something.

So if the story continues and your character repeats the same mistakes again you know that they are bound to be doomed this time, and even worse the audience is going to certainly lose respect for them, cause they have made the same mistake twice, they haven't learned anything, they're gonna do it again another time, they don't deserve a happy ending. (yes I'm talking about good omens here) So you don't do that to a character that matters to you and you respect even the tiniest bit.

A Lot of us here are thinking that this is what has happened to Aziraphale's character at the end of season two, that he has done it again, repeated the same mistake again and has left Crowley to join heaven and it's been because of reasons like wanting to change Crowley (not true, see this post), still believing in heaven's goodness (not true at all), not being on the same page with Crowley (I'm gonna talk about this one especially in this post) and such likes. But these are the things he should've known better about after 6000 years and all the events that we've learnt about especially throughout season two. (It seems to be rather the whole point doesn't it?)

But we all seem to rather believe that he's made that mistake again nonetheless. so what we're doing here is trying to find reasons to justify the mistake and somehow make the reason behind the wrong actions something relatable to ourselves so we can forgive him when the time comes.

In fact I don't believe that he's made a mistake. for Aziraphale's character to be redeemable, what he has done, must be the only option that he's had for saving them both. I don't care what kind of situation could have resulted in him making this decision, but the only reason, the one and only reason, must be his love for Crowley. Otherwise it'll prove that he hasn't learnt his lessons or doesn't love Crowley enough to make a compromise, and in both cases, he's not worthy of love. He won't earn his happy ending by being tortured and feeling sorry and doing the apology dance for Crowley if he's hurt Crowley out of selfishness and stupidity again

But I'm sure he'll earn his happy ending and I'm sure he's learnt his lessons and it's too late for him to have unlearned them all in a matter of a few seconds. (He is an idiot but he's not stupid) and it's mostly because of this, that I believe the reason why he made that decision, must be very different from what it appears to be on the surface.

Anyway, this post is about what Aziraphale has learned and how he's changed.

I have made a post about their moments of conflict from both season one and two, it's here and you can look it up. This is where you begin to understand how Aziraphale has changed since season one because these are his dialogues after he's had a fight with Crowley in the bandstand, season one:

"even if I did know where the antichrist was I wouldn't tell you we're on opposite sides"

"friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon. We have nothing whatsoever in common. I don't even like you"

"there is no our side Crowley. Not anymore. It's over"

And then there's season two, when they disagree on what to do with Gabriel, Aziraphale is the one to point out that they both rely on the life they've built together

He's asking him to help him take care of Gabriel together and in response Crowley leaves

In the final scene he asks Crowley to come back to heaven

"work with me" "We can be together as Angels, Doing good" "I need you."

He says anything he can think of literally to convince him to stay with him and it doesn't work

We start from "we're not friends" and arrive at "work with me. we can be together"

Even if we don't know the reason why he's insisting on taking Crowley back to heaven with him, this is an Angel that has picked up the pace. That wants them to be an us. No matter what.

But these are only a few dialogues. I think there's more than that. I think the show in five and a half episodes (out of six) has tried its hardest to make the point quite clear about how Aziraphale feels about Crowley (or how strongly he feels those emotions). all through the way he looks at him and through his gestures and soft touches from time to time

I'm gonna make another post of those moments separately and I'm gonna link it to this when I do.

update: (here's the post. not just average moments of Aziraphale looking cute, it's something about the way he looks at him)

And I'd like to even compare those wishful glances to some of those from season one, but I can't, cause they are nonexistent in there.

[animethottywithnobody]

"You Cryin'?"

~ ft Satoru Gojo

Synopsis -  You and Gojo have been inseparable since childhood. Everyone thought that once you both got older you'd be more independent from each other (even you) but Gojo always happened to be there exactly when you needed him... ALWAYS.

cw. dacryphilia, breeding, dubcon?? (aphrodisiacs in your drink), oral sex (male & female receiving), implied/slightly Yandere! Gojo, implied stalking, implied noncon recording, best friend! Gojo, roommate! Gojo, dom! Gojo, sub! reader, black-coded reader, afab reader, pet names are used (baby, dollface, pretty, etc)

wc. 4k

AN: I'm really nervous since I haven't properly written a fic in basically two years... I hope you guys like it.

❗️minors & blank blogs DNI❗️

“Hey baby, wanna get out of here?” You shake your head as you giggle. You're both at the biggest Halloween party of the year hosted by the most popular frat on campus.

“Toru, we just got here.” Quite literally, you and Toru just walked through the door about five minutes ago. You don’t even have a drink in your hand yet. “Let’s have fun, especially since I look so cute doing it.” You’re both dressed as Velma and Shaggy from Scooby- doo, you wanted to be Velma, and Toru wanted to match whatever you wore so people ‘know your best friends’. 

“You always look cute no need to go to a party to prove that.”

“But everyone’s at this one.”

“You can see all these people in school.”

“We live together. I can see you all day, every day.” 

He groans in frustration. “Well, that’s different.” He wraps his arms around your waist, nuzzling into your neck as he mumbles. “I missed you. Can’t I miss my best friend?” 

“I thought that was Suguru?” He groans and you giggle. “I mean, technically, you can miss me, but it should be hard when we’re basically attached at the hip.” You giggle, lifting your hand to run your fingers in his hair. You have been friends with Toru your whole life and have been quite literally inseparable since. Everyone says he is overly possessive and attached to you but he was always like that with everything and everyone… right?

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” You can hear his pout. “I just don’t want you to, I don’t know, forget about me.”

“Toru.” You lift his head and turn around in his hold. To others, this would look quite intimate but both of you have always been touchy with each other. You hold his face, able to see his pout clearly. “I’d never forget about my best friend in the whole world. You’re my other half.” His cheeks and the tips of his ears turn a cute pink as a small smile grows on his face. “But I also have other friends I like spending time with as well.” His smile drops. 

“Ugh, fine, but you’ll never have as much fun as we have when it’s just the two of us together.” He mumbles as you pull your hands from his pouty face with a giggle. You spot Suguru and Shoko walking up so you feel more comfortable leaving him.

“Others might take that the wrong way.” You tease as you walk towards your Sorority Sisters. 

You end up splitting your time between your Sorority Sisters, random guys, Satoru, and the others. With your Sorority Sisters, you talk about upcoming events, classes or dance together. When you spend time with Satoru, he leaves the friend group, so it’s just the two of you, and he always has a drink in hand for you. Nothing new to you, honestly. You both dance, sing songs and talk about the most random things. The alcohol is definitely to blame for that, at least on your part, since Satoru is a terrible lightweight, so he doesn't drink much, if at all.

You could feel eyes on you when you were with your other friends, but when you looked around, no one, not even Toru, was looking at you. Strangely, you only felt like someone was watching when you weren’t with Satoru, and not just at this party but just any time you two weren’t together. Shoko teases you whenever you bring it up to her and the girls and says you think you're the main character too much.

But when you think about it, some things don't add up whenever you’re at parties. Guys come up to talk or dance with you, but for some reason, they’d always leave, no explanation, nothing. And every time that happens, Satoru is right there to take their place. He’s always there when you need him. When your car breaks down out of nowhere, he’s there. When you’re too drunk at parties or bars with your friends, he’s there to take you home. When you’re on a date that isn’t going so well, he’s always there making the perfect excuses so you can leave. You always joke that he has spidey senses when you need him since most instances, if not all… you never called or texted saying you needed him, and he’d just laugh. 

At some point, the drinks start to taste a bit different, but you assume he’s just making a different mix now. But the more you drink, the hotter you feel. It’s like a fever is running through you, your legs feel weak, and your pussy is about to cause a flood. It’s starting to get bad, so you excuse yourself to the bathroom while your other friends tell you to be careful and that they won’t move so you can find them. 

You go to a bathroom located upstairs in the frat to have privacy. Once you reach the bathroom, you can see the sweat ruining your edges and running down leaving streaks in your makeup. You wet a paper towel and dab your face and body with cool water, hoping it will help alleviate the fever, but nothing’s working. No matter how worked up you've ever been, it’s never been this bad or this random. 

The door starts to open and you quickly push it closed, cursing yourself for forgetting to lock it. “Um, someone’s in here.” You croak, your voice filled with desperation and anxiety. 

“It’s me, princess. Your friends said you were here, so I came to check on you.” You would usually relax when you hear Satoru’s voice, but for some reason, it makes the ache feel worse. “Come on baby, let me in.” The slight plead makes you tremble as the thought of him begging for you crosses your mind. 

“Fuck, come in.” You move from the door letting him come in. You give him a once, twice, thrice over. You always knew Satoru was attractive; his fan girls can confirm that, but you never felt the need to rip his clothes off of him until now. You feel like a dog in heat with the thoughts flooding your mind.

“What’s wrong, sweets? You don’t look so good.” He leans close to your face as the cool back of his hand presses against your forehead. You shiver at his touch. Have his hands always been this big?  “You feel like you have a fever. Wanna go home lovebug?” His voice moves through you like silk and you feel like you can barely stand. 

You practically collapse in his chest, gripping his shirt tightly as you shake your head. “I…I can’t move.” His hands hold your waist causing you to whine in his chest slightly. You imagine his hands holding your waist as he fucks into you from behind, only making your pussy gush. “I feel so weak.” With your head in his chest, you miss the victorious smile on his face. His scent is driving you crazy. You should be used to it by now, but it’s almost like it’s fogging up your mind. “I don’t k-know what’s wrong with me, Toru.”

“Is there anything I can do? Maybe get you some water?” You feel him about to move away from you and tighten your grip with a ‘no’ that sounds like a desperate moan. 

“Please don’t leave me.” You look up at him with teary eyes. You feel like you're drowning in him. “I- fuck, this is so embarrassing.” You whine as tears threaten to flow down your face. “I’m so horny Toru a-and I need you to help me. Fuck I know this sounds so insane, but please, I need you so bad.” Tears stream down your face as you beg him.

His face changes from concern to something you can’t tell. His eyes darken from his almost clear ocean blue to a stormy sea blue. His grip on your waist tightens, causing you to whine out his name pathetically, your head falling to his chest again. He grabs your face with one hand, squishing your cheeks as he tilts it up to his. A giant mocking smirk is on his face as he tilts his head slightly. “You cryin’?”  

“Don’t tease me!” You try looking away, but his grip is firm. 

“Tell me exactly when you need from me.” His face looks desperate to hear it from you. He leans his face close to yours, lips almost brushing against each other. You try to close the gap, but he doesn’t let you. “Come on, baby, say it for me.” He whispers, letting his minty breath ghost your lips. 

“Please, Toru, I need you to fuck me.” As soon as the words tumble out your mouth, his lips are on yours hungrily. You’d think he’s the one who needs your help. This isn’t the first time you both have kissed, but this is one without party games and dares involved. You begged for this one, and Satoru is determined to make sure you never forget it. 

He turns you both, pushing you against the wall with his hands, bruising your hips with his grip. He moves from your lips down your neck as you let a hand move to his hair. “Fuck I’ve dreamt about this.” He mumbles into your neck as he bites and sucks on the skin, leaving marks you’d have to cover up. 

He lets a hand slide from your hip to your thigh, pulling your leg up to sit on his waist. Your skirt rides up, making it easier for him to grind against you. The feeling of your clothed core rubbing against the rough material of his jeans has you writhing and whining. “F-fuck Toru.”

 You desperately hump yourself against the tent in his jeans with desperate whines. “Please, Toru- ah s-shit baby- need you inside.” 

“I know, baby, I know.” He coos, lifting his head to kiss you on the lips. “I wanna make sure you can take me first, sweets.” He moves the hand on your leg to your clothed core, chuckling. “Aww baby, you’re soaking wet for me. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”

He slips down to his knees, all his focus on the space between your thighs. You lean against the wall for balance when you feel him force your legs apart before brushing his nose against your soaked panties. A throaty groan leaves him as he licks and bites at the drenched material. “Fuck pretty,  you taste better than I imagined.” He yanks your panties down, letting them fall to your ankles. He helps you step out of them before pocketing the tiny material. He lifts your left leg that sat on his waist and puts it over his shoulder this time. You swear he has a dreamy look in his eyes when he’s face to face with your dripping hole. “Had dreams of tasting your pretty little pussy. So much prettier in person.”

You can’t even comprehend his words as he shoves his face in between your thighs. He licks, sucks, and groans on your clit while you wiggle and moan. When you try closing your legs, he harshly grips your thighs. “Don’t interrupt my meal.” He growls before spitting on your cunt, using his long middle finger to rub it in before pushing it into you. 

Your hand flies to his hair at the stretch. “Oh yeah, baby, I always knew this pussy was so tight. Practically pulling my finger off.” He chuckles as his beautiful eyes stare up at you, cloudy with his intense desire. You almost think Satoru has never eaten in his life the way he devours your pussy like a man starved his entire life. 

“T-toru so close…” You whine as you grind yourself against his tongue and fingers, using your leg on his shoulder to push his head closer to your aching core. He groans into you as he pushes his ring finger into you, barely giving you time to adjust before letting his pointer finger join the party. “A-ahhh, wait so much.” You yank at his hair, causing him to be pulled away from you, and the sight is breathtaking. 

Finally able to see his entire face again, you see the bottom half of his face is covered in your slick. His eyes are so clouded by lust and desire that it’s overwhelming, and his hair is such a white silky mess between your fingers, almost like this was what his hair was meant for.

“Please baby, lemme keep eating.” He whines as he roughly finger fucks you. “Want you to cum in my mouth before you make a mess on my cock.” Your head falls back against the wall as your eyes close. They shoot open at the slap on your cunt. “Look. At. Me.” He delivers a harsh slap with each word, causing whines to fall from your plump lips, but you make eye contact to the best of your abilities, making the sadist smile. “Wanna see your face when you fall apart, dollface.” He coos at you as he kisses your cunt as an apology, sloppily making out with your swollen clit. “Can I continue my love?”

He truthfully doesn’t care what your answer is. He’s Satoru Gojo. He always gets what he wants one way or another. But seeing you weakly nod at him with a fucked-out look all over your face definitely made him love receiving an answer. He goes back to eating, switching his fingers and tongue so he is eating your pussy and rubbing your clit. 

Each pump of his tongue inside you or each flick of his fingers drags you closer and closer to your desired end. “O-oh my fuck! Toru, I’m gonna- shit, I'm cumming,” You whine as you hump against his mouth. He doesn't say a thing, just fucks you harder and deeper with his tongue his way of begging you to give him what he wants. It doesn’t take long for your orgasm to crash over you, feeling more intense than any orgasm you've ever had. You struggle to keep your eyes open, but if they were closed, you would’ve missed the fact that you squirted for the first time in your life all over your best friend’s face. 

Your orgasm doesn’t mean he’s stopping, though. He keeps licking at you, pushing you to slight overstimulation as he tries to drink every drop of what he's been waiting for and worked so hard for. You tug on his hair with broken ‘stop’ and ‘no more’ tumbling out your mouth. He lazily pulls away and looks up at you. “I thought you liked this. You always do it to yourself… why can’t I?” Nothing he’s saying makes sense to you, but honestly, you haven’t been able to think straight for a while now. 

“Don’t tease me. Need you, Toru.” You plead as you pull him up into a hungry kiss, tasting yourself on his tongue. You let your hand slide to his crotch, fumbling with his button and zipper.

“Fuck, your such a needy girl.” He groans into your mouth as you finally undo his jeans, pushing them down. You look down to see his big bulge, probably the biggest you’ve ever seen. He must’ve seen the look on your face because he lets out a hearty laugh. “You just gonna stare, or you gonna take it out for me, pretty?” He tilts his head with a cocky grin, reminding you who he is. 

“Fuck you.” You mumble as you squeeze him over his boxers, causing him to hiss. You slide down to your knees, looking up at him with a small smile. His eyes look down at you with a wild, almost crazed look. 

“What are you-” Satoru is rarely shocked, but he didn’t expect to see you on your knees. No matter how much he dreamed of this, he didn't plan on it happening… not this time, at least. 

“Need to make sure you can fit, right?” You tilt your head slightly as you pull down his underwear, watching with wide eyes as his cock slaps against his stomach, almost taking an eye out in the process. Not only was he big, but he was beautiful. He’s long, not too thick, with trimmed white hairs. His tip is a pretty pink mushroom that’s a deep, angry red from being neglected. He has a slight upward curve that is sure to destroy your insides. Everything is so perfectly proportioned, like everything else about him… perfect.

When you look back up at him, you expect to see a cocky look, but instead, he’s completely red and looking away from you with a hand covering his eyes. “F-fuck, don’t look at it like that.” He whines pathetically. You never imagined the day you’d see Satoru Gojo this embarrassed or embarrassed at all. 

You giggle softly before you kiss his tip gently. He shutters with a shaky whimper, leaving him as his chest heaves. “I guess everything about you really is beautiful, huh Toru?” You tease, causing him to look at you with wide eyes. Once you’ve got his eyes on you, you take his tip in your mouth. 

“Oh fuck.” He whimpers as his hand flies to your hair cautiously. He knows better than to touch your hair usually, but right now, he can’t help himself. If he doesn’t hold onto something, he’s going to cum undone right there. “D-don't look at me while you do it.” He groans when you take more of his cock in your mouth, ignoring him. “Don’t wanna- ahh fuck- don’t wanna cum yet baby please.” He pleads with you as his other hand comes down to your head.

You continue sucking his cock, taking barely half of it and using your hand to make up for what can’t fit in your mouth. When your cold hand touches his balls, he bucks into your mouth, causing you to gag. “Fuck, I’m sorry I just - oh shit- you just feel so g-good baby.” He stills your head as he slowly starts fucking your throat as he whimpers and whines, ‘I’m sorry’ over and over again. You hallow your throat and flatten your tongue, swallowing around him to make sure he feels as much pleasure as he’s given you.

You are mesmerized as you watch him fall apart above you. His pale skin is covered in a pink tint while it glistens with sweat, almost looking like glitter on his skin. His eyes are hooded, with his usual clear blue being clouded with so much lust, desire, and desperation. You swear he’s drooling as he ruts himself down your throat. “Oh shit, baby, I-I’m gonna cum- ah, can I please- ahh fucking shit- wanna cum.” You gargle an answer around him, causing him to buck faster. “T-tap twice for yes, baby, please.” You tap his thigh twice, and he wastes no time, brutally using your throat to reach his climax. His head falls back as you feel ropes of cum shoot down your throat. When his hands fall away, you pull him out with a pop, working your hand over him gently. You’re shocked that after all the cum he just released that he's still rock hard. His eyes fall on you as he breathes heavily, and you open your mouth to show you swallowed all his cum. 

He yanks you up, kissing you roughly as he lifts you up to wrap your legs around his hips. “Fucking nasty girl, aren’t you?” He wastes no time pushing his tip into you. Your mouth falls open as his tip stretches you out. “You got it, baby. We made sure I could fit, remember?”  He gives you barely a minute before he pushes more of his cock into your tight weeping cunt. “You’re sucking me in, I can’t help myself.” He whispers as he bites your neck, pushing himself all the way in. You let out a scream at the feeling of every inch inside of you, hitting spots you’ve never felt touched before. “You take my cock so good, fuckin’ made for me.”

Your head drops to his shoulder as you hold onto him for dear life. “Move Toru, I can take it.” You whimper out, and he does just that. How can he say no to his beautiful best friend when she’s begging to be fucked? He snaps his hips into yours brutally, squeezing your ass as he fucks you with no remorse. 

“Such a good fucking girl for me, takin all this dick.” He rests you against the wall so he can move a hand to your stomach, pushing on the bulge he left there. You bite his shoulder as muffled sobs leave your swollen lips. “Feelin’ me all in your tummy, baby?” He coos as you lift your head to meet his eyes. The sight of tears falling down your face does something to him, it always has. He lets out a sadistic laugh as he returns his hands to your ass before proceeding to fuck up into you while bouncing you on his cock.“Fuck baby, cry for my cock that's right.” 

Every hit has him hitting your G-spot over and over, not giving it a single break. “I’m gonna ruin you for every guy after me.” He growls in your ear. “Not even your fingers or pretty little toys will satisfy you when I’m done.” You whimper as you feel your second orgasm ready to destroy you. “You’ll beg for me when you play with that pretty little pussy, always babbling dumb shit. Now it’ll be my name on repeat.” His words are so confusing but help drag you closer and closer. 

You don’t even have a chance to warm him before your creaming on his cock, making a white ring around his base as he continues fucking into you. He pushes his head into the crook of your neck, leaving bite marks next to the previous ones he’s left. You squeeze him for all he has as you feel a third orgasm approaching. “Shit baby, imma cum baby. Ahhh where? W-where do you want it, princess?” Honestly… he’s gonna cum inside you, but he just wants to hear what you’ll say.

“I-inside Toru, please inside.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, he’s shooting his cum into your womb with a whine of your name and a joyful feeling. Of course, you’d want the same thing he wants. You two are obviously meant for each other, always have been, and always will be. He sits there for a bit as you both try to catch your breath. 

“Do you feel better?” He whispers, gently kissing your forehead as he places your feet on the ground. You nod weakly as you lean into his chest. “Good.” He pulls out, pulling your panties out of his pocket and helping you put them on quickly before too much of his cum can fall out of you. Keeping an arm wrapped around you, he opens the cupboard under the sink and pulls out a rag you recognize from home. “I’m gonna clean you up a bit, and when we get home, I’ll properly take care of you.” He whispers as he wipes your legs from the messes you both made. He kisses your legs, fingers, and head as he helps you fix your clothes and himself. 

Once you both look somewhat presentable, he pulls you into his chest. “I love you, baby girl,” he whispers as he gently kisses your lips, pulling your skirt down though it already covered you. 

“I love you too, Toru.” You whisper back before he walks out of the bathroom. After taking a moment to breathe, you walk downstairs to where your Sorority Sisters are waiting for you.

“Girl, where have you been? We’ve been looking for you.”

“What do you mean? I was in the bathroom upstairs. That’s where you guys sent Toru.”

“Um, what are you talking about? Gojo never came to ask us where you were.”

“Yeah, even if he did, we didn’t know you were upstairs.”

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I was given oral herpes by someone who didn't feel the need to disclose that they got cold sores before we had a one-time little dalliance.

I might've gone for it anyways. I'm self destructive. But I guess the lack of being able to choose whether to take the risk, it's left me feeling pretty bitter about the experience.

And I'm left feeling like a biohazard. I haven't really been able to explain to my friends yet why I'm suddenly extremely cagey about sharing my drinks and food. And all my favorite sexual activities are off the table forever. I know, dental dams, condoms, but half the fun of oral sex and making out is, you know, the taste, the heat, the absolute control. I was good at it.

It feels especially embarrassing since I'm ace and the whole reason I hooked up with the person was kind of... I don't know, fear that if I didn't, then we wouldn't be able to hang out anymore.

I'm not sure what I'm asking. Maybe, was it wrong for them not to disclose something like that? Considering how common it is? I feel obligated to disclose myself but maybe I'm just weird for that.

Thanks for doing what you do here.

Kind regards,

Asexual for Ethical Reasons Now I Guess

hi anon,

I don't often apologize for needing time to get to anons, because I really need people to have reasonable expectations about the amount of time I'm willing to commit to my inbox, but I am sorry for not getting to this one sooner. it's a topic that's very important to me, and I can tell you're dealing with a lot of hurt.

first off: I'm very sorry someone wasn't totally honest with you. that's never a good feeling, and especially in the context of sex it's a huge betrayal of trust. it's deeply unfair to you, and I hope you're able to recover from that.

having said that: you are not a biohazard. you're a person with an incredibly common virus. the World Health Organization estimates that somewhere around 80% of people worldwide have herpes (and that's a rough estimate, since they use different age ranges for HSV-1 and HSV-2). skip to the factual part of this tiktok at 00:10 seconds. herpes has been with us since before we were human; there's nothing disgusting or even unusual about having herpes.

herpes is different from most STIs in that it is lifelong, but that doesn't make you an unfuckable pariah. it makes you someone who may sometimes have open sores, and should give partners a heads up about your virus to avoid putting anyone in the same situation you're in. while you're at it, let them know that most people with herpes live asymptomatic and uncomplicated lives. many people never even know they have it!

I understand that spending the rest of your life with a viral buddy doesn't sound super fun right now, but I promise that as viruses go you can do WAY worse.

personally I've always felt the best way to get comfortable with something is to learn more about it. why not let clinical sexologist Dr. Doe talk to you about her own herpes, and how to be conscientious about minimizing the risk of sharing herpes with others?

or listen to writer Ella Dawson talk about learning to cope with the exact stigma you're currently struggling with?

or listen to Dr. Sydnee Smirl McElroy explain why herpes bears such a heavy stigma for such a mild virus in the first place?

you're not a biohazard, and neither is anyone else with an STI. that's a terrible way to think about yourself and others.

you're under no obligation to stop being sexually active if you don't want to be.

please don't feel that you have to have sex with anyone out of a sense of obligation anymore, but also please don't feel that herpes is a punishment. sickness isn't something that happens to people because they're bad or deserve, sickness happens to people because people get sick.

take care 💜

[astonmartingf]

YOUR GENTLEMAN ; LH44

— a slice of domesticity as you experience living with lewis for the first time

amgf set during the pandemic, nico rosberg mention, yay!

masterlist

Living with Lewis in Monaco definitely had its perks, but it was also coupled with drawbacks.

When you moved in, you thought it was a short stint but the few weeks turned into months, and soon you found yourself spending the whole year with him.

In the beginning you definitely found more pros than cons, living in Monaco is like a dream, especially since it was with Lewis, it only made it more special.

But as you spent more time, you found yourself growing anxious, and empty. Isolated from your family and friends, away into a foreign country, where you barely knew anyone.

"Are you sure you're okay with me going to Nico's?" You ask Lewis for the umpteenth time. Opening up last night how you felt yourself slowly going insane staying indoors. That's when Lewis suggested that you visit Nico and his family downstairs.

"I'm sure, look we've been friends since forever, and I know that you miss Nico and his family. I'm busy going to races, and you're stuck here. It's okay." Comforting your worries away, Lewis pulls you into a small hug assuring you that it's all good.

"I do miss Nico, I haven't seen him since he left you know, and you— you're both awkward together."

Lewis sends you a pointed look, "We're working on it okay, it's not like I avoid him every time I see him."

You scoff in reply, "As if you give the universe a chance for you to meet. You're always avoiding him, you literally live in the same building together."

Lewis shakes his head, clearly disagreeing with your sentiments, "You know what I'm going to walk you over to Nico's tomorrow and talk to him just to prove to you I'm not awkward with him."

"You're acting like I'm a kid handing me out on a play date! Also that's not counted since you're just going there to prove a point to yourself that you aren't affected."

Pushing a finger in front of your lips, Lewis shushed you pushing you towards your bedroom. "It's time for us to sleep, we both have a busy day ahead."

Rolling your eyes, you were met with a closed door. Following the sounds of Lewis' slippers shuffling back to his bed.

Despite being annoyed you can't find fault with him, you both had a busy day tomorrow with you spending time with the Rosberg's and Lewis with a flight to wherever the next race is.

Spending time with Nico and his family definitely boosted your mood, often forgetting about Lewis as he's constantly in and out of the country. But instead of moping in his apartment you find yourself looking forward to his arrival.

You avoid messaging Lewis during race weeks, keeping to yourself and leaving the F1 Channel playing in the background for any updates. It's nice to keep Lewis focused on the track but it also means that whatever you see on television, is all the information you have on him.

And during inadequate race conditions you're constantly stressing yourself, every yellow flag, weather update, red flag, pit stop, and other potential crashes have you on your toes.

Yet somehow, Lewis always finds a way to comfort you even if he is miles away from you. Immediately answering the radio about his updates (if he is a part of the crash) it's as if he's constantly assuring you that he is doing fine inside the car.

One time you were eating dinner after a long day with Nico's daughters, you find yourself looking forward to coming back to Lewis' apartment. Which at this point is no longer his only, it's a shared space for you two, mostly yours as you spend more time in it than him.

Cooking up something simple, you sit in solidarity finding peace in your little set up. Placing the ceramic bowl you designed with Lewis a few years back on the coffee table at the living room, instead of eating in the dining area, watching a replay of Lewis' dashboard from a previous race.

It feels like he's beside you, you find yourself listening to him as he talks with his engineers, watching his hands grip the steering wheel going lap over lap, doing what he does the best.

You end your days the same, until Lewis comes back. And it happened to be one of those days. The bell catches you off guard from taking a bite of your dinner, looking up, you find the door swing open revealing Lewis from behind.

"OH MY GOSH!" Standing up from the floor your legs stumble at the speed of your reaction. Throwing yourself at Lewis who dropped his bags at the entrance, forgotten as he wrapped his arms around yours.

"OH NO! I didn't cook dinner for you. Why didn't you tell me you were coming home?" Breaking from the hug, you smack his arm scrambling to the kitchen for a last minute meal.

You hear the sound of Lewis' laughter behind, your heart warming at the sound of his presence immediately filling the empty space in the apartment. "You don't have to cook me anything, I can make myself food."

You feel Lewis behind you as you shake your head in disappointment. "That's not it, you just came home you must be starving– how about you have my meal down there in the living room. It's fried rice, it's vegan I was about to eat so it's still warm and I can make something real quick so you can rest and-"

You were cut off with Lewis feeding you a spoon of what was supposedly your dinner. "Calm down sweetheart, we can share the bowl if you really want me to eat that bad."

A frown forms on your face, deep in thought, slowly chewing the spoonful of food, before staring into Lewis' brown eyes.

Dragging him towards the living room, you push him into the sofa before grabbing the bowl of fried rice off his hands. "Are you not hungry? You don't have to eat if you're not! You know what you should sit down and rest, or do you want to take a short bath? I can-"

"I can do those things myself. You're stressing over me when I'm at races, and when I'm here you're also stressing yourself over me. You're supposed to relax." Softly grabbing your hands, Lewis pushes you next to him on the sofa.

"I can't help it you know. It's instinct at this point. When I first started living here you basically took care of me when I was feeling down, and now I'm doing the same. We need to take care of each other Lewis, I'm basically responsible for you."

Nodding slowly in agreement, Lewis grabs your hands holding it into his, "And I'm also responsible for you, which I'd like to think is more important than me. I can't have you stressed over your time here, imagine what your parents will say- God forbid, what my parents say."

You gasp, laughing at his statement, "My well being is more important? I think not, you're literally out there racing and going out- imagine Toto Wolff calling me because you're not in perfect condition."

"Then let me handle it. I doubt Toto has anything bad to say about you." Lewis mumbles under his breath, but you catch his statement.

"What would Toto Wolff know about me? What have you been talking about Lewis? I swear if you're spreading that I'm not taking care of you, I'll actually reveal to the world that you're still awkward with Nico."

Your threat seems to leave little to no effect then you expect, but at least you got him laughing.

Happy drivers mean good results.

"And you don't have to tiptoe around me, I doubt anyone has the balls to say that to my face except you- maybe Seb, but it doesn't matter. You don't have to worry about me, my racing, or my relationship with Nico."

Your eyes squint at his statement, still not believing him. His eyes meet yours, not giving up.

"Fine." You lower your gaze first.

"Let me draw you a bath though." Before Lewis could complain, you march towards the bathroom. Behind you, you hear Lewis laughing, you can see him shaking his head in disbelief.

"After that you better finish your dinner, then tomorrow we can do something together."

You smile to yourself, nodding in agreement. Despite the circumstances, you'd rather spend your time with Lewis like this. At the end of the day, even if you're miles apart from each other you will always come back to each other.

[lover-of-mine]

I'm here to argue my case about how Eddie fell first and has in fact been semi-aware of his feelings since season 3 and it's currently dealing with the way he thinks he'll have to be the best man on Buck's wedding. So sit down, buckle up, grab your delusional drink of choice (today I'm drinking my delusional tea lol), and let's go.

Okay, given season 6 information, we know Buck and Eddie are roughly the same age and we know Eddie was pursued by Bobby and Bobby wanted a partner for Buck (unrelated but Bobby so hoped the military guy would balance out Buck and for a while there he ended up with two very impulsive firefighters and he definitely had a few what the hell have I done moments lol) so it's kinda safe to assume that Buck was one of the selling points of the 118 because Buck is a very competent firefighter and they would be on the same shift. So Eddie went in with the expectation of someone his age he could befriend. I'm making some assumptions but the internet tells me the academy takes a year, we know Eddie still doesn't have a permanent childcare plan, so this man is interacting outside of the academy exclusively with his 7 yo, his abuela, and tia for a year, so I think that the idea of having a friend his own age was appealing to him. Especially after the army and Shannon leaving him. So much so that with his sharp edges, you can actually read things like "I'd go lower" or "you're in the wrong light, man" as attempts to create a bond, very awkward I haven't tried to make friends in forever attempts but attempts nonetheless because he's trying to be helpful. Buck is being Buck, but even Eddie says I hear you're a good guy, so dude is trying to understand what's happening, what's setting Buck off, and while he matches Buck's energy after the gym conversation, he actually continues to try and bond with Buck with the thing that actually works and the "you're badass under pressure" that is still another attempt to get through to Buck. I have various theories about the way Eddie keeps trying to start something, the one I like the most and the most painful one is about how Eddie has had the weight of the world on his shoulders forever. And he had to grow up really fast, and then there is Buck annoying him about nicknames and discussing his body fat percentage, and with all that really carefree energy season 1 and beginning of season 2 Buck had that he probably wanted to know what it felt like. But Buck is Buck and Buck also wanted a friend so dude imprinted on Eddie like a baby duck. But Eddie doesn't mind, like before Bobby comes in to say who got the spot on the calendar, Eddie looks amused by Buck not annoyed. But up until now, that's casual. They're coworkers.

Then we have the earthquake. We know Christopher is Eddie's whole world and he's very careful about the people he lets into their life, considering the earthquake happened on Maddie's first day on the floor and she must've had some sort of training before that, it's safe to assume that Eddie didn't mention Chris at the firehouse for at least a few weeks and he is very hesitant to tell Buck about him, but again Buck is Buck and he switches into reassurance mode and that's when Eddie actually lets him in. I actually would love it if we had an explanation as to why Buck drove Eddie to Chris' school after the shift, but it's something that he went from being hesitant to even mention he existed to introducing Buck to him. But then we have the moment Buck becomes his ride-or-die, you imprinted on me but now I'm hanging on to you, with the whole going to the hospital with him because of abuela and also the way that Buck clears Chris staying at the firehouse before Eddie thinks to do it.

This moment right here it's what gets Eddie. He's ready to apologize and justify and he doesn't have to because Buck stepped up to do something simply because he realized Eddie needed help and he could do something about it. Eddie is doing everything alone and he needs help but he doesn't know how or who to ask for it and Buck just steps in and does it before he needs to ask. And then there's Carla. Buck tricks him into showing up and literally hands him the solution to his problems because Buck knows Eddie wouldn't accept it if Buck had said what that was about beforehand, but at no point does Buck make it seem like Eddie is a bad parent for needing help. And I think with the whole thing with his parents trying to take Chris from him, that really does something.

I really like to use the second gif here as a major example of Eddie's heart eyes for Buck, but the first one, when he realizes who Carla is and what she can give him completely changes his demeanor. He was ready to be polite, was probably trying to figure out a way out without saying he was still married, but instead, Buck does something that not only makes Eddie's life easier but makes Christopher's exponentially better. And right then, Eddie is done for. I'm not saying he fell in love with Buck here, I'm just saying right here is when Eddie goes you're stuck with me now dude, and let his guard down with Buck, as much as this Eddie can at least. That's when something starts for him. You can't change my mind on this one. But for now, there's the Shannon of it all, because Eddie does love Shannon but their relationship is beyond complicated. 

But Buck is still constant through Shannon and I think that's important, actually, because Eddie is having trouble trusting Shannon and I feel like having Buck around helps him not go straight to the worst-case scenario all the time. I don't have a point in mentioning this, it's just a clear show of how much Eddie already trusts Buck, but to have Buck go with him to take Chris to see Santa is so wild. Who takes their best friend to see Santa with their kid? Like, what?? But Isn't it interesting that Eddie decides to propose again after Buck asks when is the wedding? I find that fascinating really. Then Shannon dies, Buck almost dies, dude goes into move past it mode but the seed is there. Forever thinking about the wistful shot of Eddie saying almost after Hen says things are back to the way they should be. Something else about the finale it's that it's the first in the list of irrationality moments from Eddie regarding Buck. Eddie is a firefighter, he's objectively stronger than Chimney, so the logical thing to be done is to have Eddie helping lift the truck and Chim treating Buck. But no, at that moment he's a medic who's there to hold Buck's hand. He's just holding Buck's hand. He could've left Buck with Hen and go help lift the truck. But no, he's staying by Buck's side.

But season 3 is when things HAPPEN. We start out strong with the sheer excitement on Eddie's face that Buck is going back to work. Then the way Eddie just hands Christopher over to Buck without a single worry. "Oh, you're falling apart? Here's a kid, he will help" and just goes. We focus a lot on Buck's reaction to them finding Chris because it is what the show wants us to focus, this is the moment Buck looks at Chris and goes "shit I really love that kid" but Eddie looking back at Buck as he holds Chris is interesting. Eddie just went through 30 seconds (actually it's 1 minute 4 seconds from the moment Eddie notices Buck to Eddie having Chris in his arms not that it matters) of the worst possible moments in a parent's life and I guess, since Buck didn't have Chris, and Buck was too shaken to explain what had happened, he assumed Buck lost Chris during the first wave and he's looking back because he's shocked he saved not only himself but Chris from the wave, but from his focus to shift to Buck like that it's interesting. Even more, considering the way he barges into the loft to hand Chris over again. "There's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you" I'm sorry, there's no platonic explanation for the wording of this, okay? This is a man who looked at his honest to god wife, the mother of his child, and said "I can forgive you, I'm just not sure I can trust you" and trust is always the thing Eddie struggles with. To trust someone with Christopher is Eddie's ultimate show of love because it's what makes sense with his character, he is loyal until it kills him but nothing goes above Christopher. Also, Mr. Kids are signs hands over his own child to someone and I'm not supposed to look at that and go "huh wonder what he's feeling"? And there's the lawsuit of it all. Eddie gets that mad because he misses Buck and has no idea what to do with it. Because he got used to being a priority to Buck and he cannot handle the idea that maybe he's not. He's struggling, Chris is struggling and he needs Buck to do the thing he does where he fixes the problem without Eddie having to ask. But Buck has no real responsibility to Eddie or Chris, you can't really expect your best friend to base his life decisions on what's best for you. But it is the expectation Eddie has. He needs Buck to consider him. He needs Buck to be there for him no matter what. And at this point, when he's screaming at Buck as if they are a divorced couple, he's aware of something. He's definitely aware of something he doesn't want to look too closely at. 

Because being left by Buck leaves him completely off balance. And since Eddie is famous for not dealing with the shit he's feeling, things keep escalating because anger it's easier. Anger he can deal with. But in the end, he just wants Buck back so he forgives him the second he lets Buck speak. Because he wants the Buck that looks right through him, he wants what they have back. And he doesn't hesitate once he does. There are definitely some lingering feelings about how he kept pushing Shannon away and then she died and he "lost" time he could've had if he had let her in after he sought her out, so when Buck apologizes he just goes let's go team and moves on because tomorrow isn't promised to anyone. 

But I think there's something important to take into consideration, that it's Eddie's therapy session. He talks about not feeling anything, good or bad, and the his feelings are boxed thing and how he doesn't know what to do with them and yes, that comes back into play later, but it is important that Eddie doesn't name his feelings and he consistently tries to box them and move past them instead of feeling them, and it gets to a point where he's doing this even to positive things. So he is not looking too closely as to why missing Buck throws him off balance. He's all let's go back to the way things were and they do. Forever seeking for a heterosexual explanation to the kitchen scene in 3x09 but I also do think there are different types of tension between them there. Because while Buck is teasingly trying to get Eddie to admit on what had happened and how Buck's absence was a trigger for Eddie's fight club era in his flirty way of his, Eddie is trying to make him stop talking in a real "man don't make me look at what happened too closely" because he doesn't know what he'll find. Or if he's ready to find it. Considering the whole widower who never processed a big emotion in a healthy way he has going on there. But Buck is a really steady presence in Eddie's life, and Buck does his best to not put them in the lawsuit situation again, he's around, he's helping Eddie with parenting issues and then we have the well.

The well is a pivotal moment. Not just because of the sheer amount of Buck in Eddie's I need to keep fighting montage and the way Buck is acting above the ground, but because of the way Eddie changes his will after that and chooses to hide the fact that he did. Eddie has parents who are more than willing to raise Christopher, he has sisters, he has a lot of blood relatives that he could assign as Chris' guardians if something happens, but he chooses Buck. He chooses a firefighter, who is not only a firefighter, it's also his partner so if Eddie ends up in a life-threatening situation, Buck will probably be there too, so it's not the biggest safeguard. Buck is also single and without kids of his own. He also has known Buck for what? 2 years at that point? Eddie's lawyer probably stared at Eddie in disbelief when Eddie explained the situation. But the real thing about the will is that Eddie doesn't talk about it. Dude had some revelations while under all that mud because the only reason he wouldn't tell Buck is if he couldn't tell Buck without talking about himself. That's the only explanation for why he would hide it. Because Buck would ask why him, why now, like he did when Eddie did finally tell him, but right then Eddie can't shift the focus back to Buck. But there's a very subtle change in the way Eddie acts around Buck after the well. And again, sure, you can play off Eddie's reaction to when Buck wants to do something dangerous as he needs Buck to stay alive, but you can't really apply that logic to the way Eddie acts about Abby. Like, Eddie is petty to girls who want Buck, that's a fact. And Eddie is petty about Abby, but he also gets unsure about his place in Buck's life when he sees Buck's reaction to seeing Abby. And they focus on Eddie there. We get Eddie's reaction to that interaction. That means something.

We get Eddie legit feeling insecure about his place in Buck's life over the fact that Abby is there. And Eddie knows Abby as this entity, the one that got away, the person responsible for Buck being the way he is, because that's the way Abby is talked about, and sure, if I was in Eddie's shoes, only seeing the damage someone did to my best friend and then have them risking their life because of whatever lingering feelings are still there, I would also reserve myself the right to hate them, but it's more than that. Like, the way he backs away from the both of them once Buck goes into protector mode.

"Abby, His fiancée's Abby." *stomps away*. Absolutely insane interactions happen there that paint Buck as still hung up on Abby, even more after the whole thing with Red, but if you look at it with the right lenses, it paints Eddie as jealous of the way Buck is willing to put himself in danger to keep someone who broke him happy.

Every reaction from Eddie in the train wreck feels so calculated to give this idea that he's unsure of his place in Buck's life. His face when he realizes who he's talking to, his hand hovering over Buck's shoulder like he wants to comfort him but doesn't know if he can, the way he looks at Buck after Abby and Sam are in the ambulance. He's completely off balance at the sight of the ghost of Buck's great lost love and I'm supposed to believe that man is just experiencing platonic friendship feelings about his best friend? Come on. 

Season 4 is complicated. Because of the Ana and Taylor of it all. They do have the easy banter, Eddie being someone Buck can rely on during the whole mess with his parents, a few scenes of Buck completely comfortable in Eddie's space and Eddie just moving around him like he's meant to be there, but we know the Ana of it all happens because of external pressure. Eddie thinks he needs to date, so he grabs onto the first woman he can. The way his whole body relaxes when he realizes Christopher is with Buck is actually insane. But even though he's dating, he's holding on to Buck in a way. Absolutely obsessed with how much he hates Taylor. Dude legit looks like he's fantasizing about running her over with the fire engine while watching Buck and Taylor interact making Buck ignore him. 

But then Eddie gets shot. Say whatever the fuck you want Eddie reached for Buck. He thought he was dying. And he reached for Buck.

Eddie's been aware of something he doesn't want to look at too closely since the lawsuit that became harder to ignore after the well that he became fully aware of when he got shot. I know that what we have now says Eddie doesn't remember the shooting but wouldn't it be beautiful if he lied because he can't say what he remembers because everything he remembers is about Buck? The dramatic effect of I'm lying to you because I realized I loved you then but I can't tell you that now? Ugh. Anyway, Eddie got shot, things fell into place when he hit the ground, terrible place to have an oh! moment though. Dude just got shot, he's bleeding out, and the thing he gathers the rest of his energy is to ask if Buck is hurt. Sure, you can look at that as I think I'm dying so one of us has to make it home to Chris, but the possibility of it being an I love you I need to know you're okay before this kills me it's there. But he doesn't die. And when he wakes up Buck tells him it would've been better if he had been shot. You can see it on Eddie's face that he kept rehearsing what he was going to say about the will. Something else is the way that Ali takes Buck home after the truck so it would honestly make sense if Ana took Eddie home but he probably asked Buck to do it. That scene feels like an aborted love confession. "You act like you're expendable but you're wrong" the way he's saying you're not spare parts, you're not less important, you matter so much to me. Eddie knows Buck, he knows Buck associates love with pain. He wouldn't actually say something after he almost died, but it feels like he's working up to something. Sure he needs to break up with Ana, but there's time before he heals and can just, do something about it. But then Taylor fucking Kelly is in his welcome home party. He knew Buck and Taylor were working up to something. He knows Taylor being there means it happened. A violent reminder that Buck is straight (debatable) and doesn't feel the same (also debatable). So back to safety, he goes. 

I need to know who decided that having this particular look when they are literally talking about how Eddie is about to meet Ana's whole family was the way to go.

Also, can you believe Eddie needed Buck's approval to break up with the girlfriend he didn't even want to date anyway?

Season 5 is complicated because of Eddie's PTSD, 5A has a lot of Eddie pulling away because of the way he knew when the dam broke it wouldn't be pretty and he didn't want to take down anyone with him. But even when we see Eddie out of the job, we see him making an effort to include Buck and Taylor so Buck would know that he really did mean the whole "you're stuck with us" thing. I can talk about 5x11 to 5x14 and the implications of it to buddie for days, really, (you can read this for some of those thoughts), but the thing here I guess, it's a lot about how when the box exploded, the feelings are all over the place, Eddie sits back and lets Buck in. He talks about the way he's feeling in a way we don't really see Eddie do all that often and he leans on Buck through his recovery and the process of finding out how to not feel like there's no hope for himself and how to feel comfortable in his own skin again. And it's a lot about Buck and the way Buck is constant. Eddie feels like Buck is this steady presence in his life that can and does help Eddie move forward.

But the thing is, the shooting happened, Eddie realized things, Taylor Kelly (derogatory) happened, Taylor Kelly (derogatory) took herself out of the running, Eddie now has the tools to deal with his own emotions, he's single, Buck's single, they're having dinner with Chris at Buck's loft and Eddie is asking Buck about things Chris kept from him, but Eddie is in a fantasy bubble where he can pretend he has the things he wants without actually asking for anything to change. I mean, post therapy Eddie is better with his feelings, but he's still Eddie. He was in his little I have time bubble. That was violently popped. Because Buck died. And he had to save him. "Do more" is such a desperate thing for a first responder and former combat medic to scream at a team of doctors. He knows they always do the best they can. He did the best he could, but there's only so far he can go. The way he follows the gurney hurts me in so many ways. Some real don't go where I can't follow bullshit.

This is a man who watched Buck almost die multiple times. But this is also a man who never contemplated the possibility of Buck actually dying. The thing that drives me crazy about Eddie and everything surrounding Buck's death is that he can't look at it. He can't take his eyes off him, but once he's out of his sight he can't look at him again. He spends the whole time not looking at Buck. He looks away every time someone mentions it. Even when he's in the room with Chris he's not looking. 3 minutes 17 seconds. Look, this number bothers me. Bobby said they were 3 minutes out from the hospital and that it took 3 minutes to start compressions. So Buck was dead for 6 minutes. The rescue took 3 minutes. And Eddie counted. That's the only explanation for this particular number. He counted how long it took to get Buck to Chim and Hen and in the ambulance ready to go.

But Eddie was living comfortably in his bubble, I don't think he was at peace with it, but I do think he accepted it. But Buck wakes up, Buck seeks him out to help deal with the trauma. They look like a family, they act like a family, maybe it's not hopeless after all. Maybe Buck can feel the same and they can talk about it once Buck is not feeling so raw over his own death. Buck is just there all the time, something like that can't be one-sided, can it? But then Buck pulls the rug from under him. I made a very long post about the cemetery, you can read that one if you want, but the thing about that conversation is that it is a reminder that they are not on the same page. Because Buck throws him off balance again, considering the way Eddie was trying his hardest to be there for Buck just for Buck to say he's getting what he wants from a random woman he met a few days before. And it makes Eddie back away so he won't end up hurting his own feelings more. I think at this point Eddie has accepted the fact that he's going to have to be Buck's best man and is trying to find a way to be okay with it. So he's retreating to familiarity again. It explains why he's trying to recreate what he had with Shannon because he loved Shannon, so maybe if he found that again he wouldn't have to cut Buck off to move on. Because he needs Buck on some level but there is a limit on how much he can take while Buck goes around looking for something he already has.

And yes I talked and talked and talked but why does this mean Eddie fell first? Well, Buck will never figure it out on his own. The thing about Buck is that Buck doesn’t know what healthy love is. He thinks love is work, but in a it’s bleeding himself dry for someone way. He thinks love is pain. Eddie is safety. Eddie is home. He never knew home as a place where he can find love.

This is all for today. If you read this I love you. Also the doc I typed it out says it has over 4.3k words so this is long as fuck congratulations for sticking through it 🩷

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for being a "cheater" (even though my gf is the one I "cheated" with)?

Title sounds bad, but hear me out. Some background info: I (F25) left a very toxic relationship with my ex (F29) almost a year ago. We were together for 2 years and it was a very tumultuous and rocky relationship from the beginning. She convinced me I needed to leave my home state and move in with her 8 weeks into dating or she would break up with me, and I was stupid and in love and I did it. Then she would always hold the fact that she could kick me out over my head when we argued. I didn't like her taking my clothes without asking? She threatened to kick me out. I get mad that she's blasting her music when I'm trying to work? She threatened to kick me out. Really anything I said that she didn't like, she would threaten to kick me out. Even threw my stuff out on the front lawn a couple times.

And I admit, I wasn't a perfect angel in this relationship either. I felt powerless and resentful because it was impossible to bring up any grievances big or small with her, so I would intentionally break or hide her things. I was downright mean to her most days, and we were both physically violent with each other several times. Towards the end of the relationship I was sleeping in the floor in the living room because I couldn't stand to be near her, and if I slept on the couch she would push me off of it to sit and watch TV with friends she brought home late at night. It took me a while to leave because I was alone in a new state with nowhere to go, and I had to save up money to find a place. Like I said, it was a deeply toxic relationship on both sides, and I'm not proud of it and I'm in therapy trying to unpack what I did and what was done to me.

Now for the actual situation: one of my ex's friends who I'll call Emily (F27) was always very nice to me, and I would often complain to her about my ex and she would comfort me. I'll admit I started to develop feelings for her while I was still trying to work things out with my ex, and I even made out with her and nearly had sex with her once. But that made me feel extremely guilty and I stopped it, then stopped talking to Emily all together.

But when about 3 months after I moved into a new place Emily reached out to me online and we started talking again, then after another 3 months started tentatively dating. I say tentatively because I was very hesitant to go into any relationship after the fiasco with my ex, especially with Emily who is still friends with her. We would text and call each other daily and meet up to hang out a couple times a week.

We've been dating for about 6 months now and we've kissed and held hands, but that's about it. We haven't had sex. We haven't said I love you. We haven't even had a "what are we" talk yet, but Emily wants me to move in with her. I told her I wasn't ready for that. She says it would help both of us save money to live together and I should be comfortable with her by now, since we've been dating triple the time I was dating my ex when I moved in with her. I reminded her how well that turned out for me (not well at all!), and she said something that hit me like a ton of bricks: "Well, you're the cheater and I'm still taking the chance to trust you, so you should take the chance to trust me."

I asked her what she meant by that, and she said I'm not the one taking a risk in our relationship. She is, by dating someone who cheated on her dear friend (my ex). I said that wasn't exactly a happy healthy relationship, she said doesn't matter. Still a cheater. I said but I cheated with her! She said doesn't matter, still a cheater.

I hung up with her because I felt like I was going to be sick and she's been blowing up my phone asking if I'm alright and even apologizing and saying we can wait longer to move in together, but part of me is rethinking this whole relationship. She's been wonderful to me up till now, am I blowing things out of proportion? Is she trying to lure me into another toxic relationship? Please help, I feel like my ability to see red flags is still virtually nonexistent at this point :(

What are these acronyms?

[pedripics]

Pedri via Residency - July 18, 2024

How are you feeling? - "Incredible! Winning the Euros was crazy"

How is the injury? - "Better every day. I've just started my holidays, but I'm training every day to recover and start the season at the top of my game"

Winning the World Cup? - "I can't even imagine that feeling. It's the dream that every child who plays football wants to fulfil. I have already won LaLiga with Barça and now the Euros with Spain. Now on to the Champions League and the World Cup"

How did your family react to seeing you win the Euros? - "They were very happy! They were with us at every game of the tournament and at the celebrations"

Feelings for next season? - "Very good, both personally and as a team. It could be a great year"

Winning World Cup or Champions League? - "Why choose? That's like choosing between your dad and mom"

How did you feel when you were lying on the ground because of your injury? - "I knew what he had done to me that was going to stop me from playing. I was in pain and also annoyed that I had to stop because of the injury."

Do you like Japan? - "Yes! I like sushi... and I won an Olympic medal there"

Will Nico come to Barça? - "I have no answer to that question. What is clear is that he would be a great signing for Barça. He has shown what he is capable of in the Euros"

Would you play as a goalkeeper? - "Hahahaha that's what my father was there for. There is no need for more goalkeepers in my family"

Did you have a great time at the Euros celebrations? - "I had a crazy time, actually. It was a moment of celebration with the whole country after a great tournament. Although I had to take care of my knee at all times. The rest of the players didn't have that problem 🥲" (kroos i am gonna find you istg)

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? - "Well... playing football at the highest level, like now. In the future I want to start a family, but in 5 years i am not so sure"

Is it fun to do photoshoots? - "I always say no to my team and especially at the beginning I was embarrassed, but now I'm used to it. I try to have fun and have a good time, although I prefer a ball to a camera"

Advice when you suffer from your first big injury? - "Well, be patient, because in the end, with work and effort, the good times return"

Feelings for the new season? - "I think it's going to be really good. Now it's time to rest a bit and recover and get back to work as soon as possible under the orders of the new coach. We are sure that this new season will bring us a lot of joy."

Do you have a favourite female singer? - "Hora Cero, by Myke Towers, is the one I've liked the most lately... and of course 'Pedro' by Raffaella Carrá" (sir that's not an answer and we both know it lol)

Real Madrid will win La Liga again - "Veremos..."

Advice for young players? - "Have fun playing and try not to lose the things that street football gives you"

Favourite teammate? - "Ferran. The truth is, he is a great teammate and friend. He always supports me and gives me advice"

Is Ferran single? - "I would say so, unless he's gotten a girlfriend since Tuesday when I haven't seen him"

Your best friend? - "I have several. Dani, Fran and Rubén, who have been my friends since childhood"

Are you excited about the new Camp Nou? - "I am already looking forward to playing there again. Playing at the Camp Nou will surely help us on be on top... The visit impressed me, because of the project and because I saw how it works inside"

Where are you on vacation? - "As always, I am on holidays on my island, in Tenerife"

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Looking like my profile picture (a picture of him being bald)? - "Yessss. Everyone is asking me if I am going bald... one day I will, for sure! That's easier than having Cucurella's hair"

Dream vacation? - "Wherever it is, with my family and friends"

Who do you think will be the next Golden Boy? - "Lamine, 100x100"

Tea or coffee? - "I drink neither"

Are you learning English? - "I learnt a bit… let's see if after the holidays I really get into it and speak it properly soon"

Where did your obsession with bananas come from? - "It's not an obsession. It's true that i really like them and in the Canary Islands, it's a typical product used in many recipes"

What do you do so bad comments don't affect you? - "do things as good as possible. I know what I do and what I do not do; I cannot control what people say or invent"

You promised to grow a mustache. When will you do it? - "Maybe I am doing it these days and then I will share some photos" (NO PLEASE DON'T)

[inthedoghousern]

11:45

part III of just this once (I) and okay (II)

pairing: oscar piastri x driver!fem!reader

summary: all eyes are on you and oscar after the monaco paparazzi pictures, and the two of you haven't been in the same vicinity since that night. after weeks of avoiding it, you two confront one another and your feelings.

contains: some social media, swearing, angst, fluff, brief mention of sex.

3.8k words

a/n: was going to end this angsty but i only got 1 comment on my last post and it was someone who wanted another part... so this one is for you @andruuu28

f1gossipofficial

Liked by mclarenfan3744 and 88,402 others f1gossipofficial Oscar Piastri and Y/n Y/l/n spotted together after the Monaco Grand Prix.

View all 31,288 comments

-

The rumors were in full effect. 

Your night with Oscar had taken social media by storm. The rumors were more than just you two being close friends, there was this notion going around that a potential romance was forming. 

The whole thing annoyed you, it was a moment that shouldn't have been public in the first place, a moment you should’ve been smart enough to avoid. 

It's been a few weeks now since Monaco, and you've done your best to keep the situation from growing even larger. No interaction with Oscar, denying any romance, reminding everyone that the two of you have known each other for years, that you're only colleagues and friends. Not everyone liked this response, especially since it's been clear that over the past few years, you and Oscar haven't really been friends, but rivals. But you stuck to the same explanation, and Oscar and McLaren gave the same one as well.

-

You're now sitting in a meeting with your PR team. Even though there have been multiple Grand Prixs since the photos started circulating, you were still getting questions about them. “If you're asked about it, don’t comment. If you feel the need to say anything, just remind them that you’ve known Oscar for years and you’re simply friends," your manager tells you. You nod in agreement.

You were used to having the spotlight all on you, but now you're having to deal with it being on you and Oscar together.

Your manager's advice had been to shut down the rumors and just focus on the races, it was the smartest move. But your mind couldn't help but drift to the memories of Oscar. You had known him for years and suddenly some pictures of one night in Monaco caused you two to be branded as more than friends by the public. It was all just so overwhelming. How being in the F1 world made every moment in your life a spectacle. 

“Alright…” your PR manager moves on, “speaking of Piastri, you have a panel with him today, alongside Tsunoda and Sargeant. Some sort of young driver thing.” 

Your heart drops a little, you'd been lucky enough up until this point that you hadn't had to do any media with him. You got to address the rumors, separately. The luck has run out. 

The panel was intended to showcase the young drivers, but now it was more than just a panel to you. You were scared it would become the focus of all the rumors and discussions about you two.

Obviously no one knew that the rumors had backing, that you had actually slept together, no one except you and Oscar. But it still made you nervous that you would be together, that every word you speak to each other during this conference, every look, is going to be dissected by fans and media looking to find out if there really is anything happening.

-

The walk to the panel brought you past fans and media alike. For the most part, they were asking questions regarding the races in the upcoming days, but one reporter got brave and decided to bring the rumors up.

"We all know about you two dating, when are you gonna go public with this relationship?" His question was loud enough to draw the attention of other reporters and fans. You're still walking as he asks, and the reporter is in step with you.

“Hey look, the only people I’m in love with out here are the ones who keep my car going fast,” you put your hands up in a joking surrender. You hope your humor towards the situation would show your indifference, make them see how ridiculous all the talk is. 

Your response was able to brush off the question without even really addressing the rumors. And it worked, he laughed at your joke and moved on, a few of the other reporters were even laughing at the joke, which made you feel a little bit better.

It was time to focus again because now you were nearing the panel and you still had to be focused on getting through it without all the attention being on you and Oscar.

You walk into the press room, journalists are sitting in their chairs, waiting for the proceedings to start. Out of the four of you, you're the first to arrive. One of the coordinators guides you to a seat and you put your mic on. You give a closed-lip smile and direct a nod at the room. Now it’s just time to wait for Oscar, Logan, and Yuki. 

The room was filled with chatter, the journalists were eager to get some insight into the young drivers of the grid. But the chatter soon dies down and the room becomes quiet, the silence only intensifying as Oscar walks onto the stage, followed by Logan and then Yuki. Because you were the first one to arrive, you were seated on the far end, and the coordinator that sat you led Oscar right next to you. Great.

-

As the MC introduces you all and opens the floor for questions, the photographers get busy snapping pictures of the panel. Oscar is right beside you, the two of you next to each other in full sight of the cameras, but he's busy looking straight ahead. So are you. 

He's trying to avoid eye contact with you, he doesn't want the cameras to catch on to how he wants to look at you.

A few questions come in from the journalists to each driver individually, Logan is asked a question, which he answers, and so does Yuki. You're asked a few about you're dynamic with Max, and Oscar is asked about his with Lando.

The panel continues to go around the room a few more times, when you, Logan, and Oscar are asked a question. 

“So, you three have been racing together for quite a long time”, he starts, “when can we expect a podium with the three of you? Imagine a moment like that!” He says passionately. I smile at his question. It was true, that during those early days of you and Oscar racing, Logan was there as well. You all had even driven for Prema together for a year. 

You answer first, “Logan when do you think…” you joke and lean forward to look at him. Your response is an obvious dig at him driving for Williams, a team that isn’t well-known for getting podiums. Even getting points. Logan gets the jab pretty fast.

Logan laughs and takes the bait, "Oh I can already feel a podium coming on this weekend," he jokes and everyone has a little laugh, including you and Oscar. 

You lean back again and reach to grab Logan’s shoulder, giving it a small squeeze. “No shade, Sargent,” you smile. While reaching back to grab Logan, your arm brushes against Oscar’s back. 

Logan smiles back, he knows it was just a little joke and doesn't take it personally. Oscar, on the other hand, is sensitive to your touch and feels a spark go through him when you brush against him. He can feel his muscles and body tense up just a tiny bit, he masks it by joining in on the joke, turning and smiling at Logan as well.

-

As the panel wraps up, you both feel a sense of some relief. Things had gone rather smoothly and the reporters were satisfied. And no one asked any questions about the pictures of you in Monaco. 

Oscar was just glad the session was over, now he could finish the rest of his press obligations and go back to the hotel. But as he looks around, he still sees you sitting there, looking away talking to someone on your team, and he is partially in disbelief that you just sat through an entire panel with him, acting like there was nothing wrong. Because for him, he can't stop thinking about you, during the whole panel he was focused only on you.

In contrast, you're focusing on the conversation with your team member, completely turned away from Oscar. “Okay, yeah sure,” you answer to one of your manager's questions. You put the mic on the table and stand up.

Oscar looks away as you stand up, he hopes he wasn’t staring for a noticeable amount of time. He takes his mic off as well, standing up and making his way to the McLaren team. 

It was a brief moment of eye contact, but when your eyes met with his, you could feel the intensity of everything between you and Oscar all rush back into your chest. It was just a look, a look that said a thousand things. A look that told you and Oscar everything that had happened between you. 

You're the first one to break eye contact, and you both walk away, exchanging no words, as each of you sticks closely with your teams on your way out of the room. 

Just two people who've had a lot of tension between them who were now trying to pretend like none of it ever happened. But neither of you were good liars.

-

The next day, you go through practice sessions like normal. You do more interviews, debrief with the engineers. Nothing special. Just business as usual. 

It's now later in the day and you're back at the hotel sitting on a couch, just scrolling on your phone, trying to let your mind relax. A few Red Bull employees had been sitting with you earlier, but they had all left to do their own thing at this point. You have been alone for a few minutes now, but you're suddenly disrupted by someone sitting next to you, his presence makes you tense up as you know who it is.

“Hey.” He says. “Hi.” You respond almost reluctantly.

Oscar could tell that you weren't really happy about him sitting down next to you, and he should leave, he shouldn't have even sat down, but he was going to stay for a little bit to at least attempt to have this conversation. 

He sat in silence for a few moments after you responded, before finally saying, "How were your sessions today?”

“Pretty good,” I answer. “What about you?”

"Yeah, mine were fine too." 

Very successful conversation. You both sit in silence again, and you look back at your phone. 

"How long are we going to avoid the obvious?" Oscar finally says, getting to the reason he sat down next to you in the first place.

You put your phone down. “I don’t know…” you trail off. “But it seems like whatever we’re doing now has diverted the media off our trail," you half-joke. You dance around his question. You're scared to talk about it. 

Oscar was tired of pretending, it was killing him to keep quiet and act as if nothing had happened. He didn't know how much longer he could take it. 

"That's not what I meant, you know what I'm talking about..." he said softly, his eyes just looking straight into you, trying to get you to look at him.

You lean your head on the back of the couch. You don’t meet his eyes yet. “Oscar I already told you… it was one time… we shouldn’t have let it even happen.” You're not sure if you really mean that, but you do regret that it was a door that you allowed to open. A door that you don’t want to close, but you have to. 

Oscar sighs, your excuses are falling on deaf ears right now. 

"Sure, we shouldn't have let it happen, but it did. So why are we pretending like it didn't? This is ridiculous." He said, his voice not raising, but you could tell he was annoyed with you.

"Is this really what you're gonna say every time we're together like this? That it was just one time? Because I'm not satisfied with that answer anymore."

“Okay okay," you surrender. “Look if we need to just talk this out, for once and all, get it out of our systems, fine. You tell me what you need to say. But you know we can’t do it here.” You lift your head and finally look at him. If he wanted to talk, okay. But you had worked so hard to dispel the rumors, and having a heart-to-heart in this hotel lobby where anyone could catch a listen was counterproductive. 

Oscar nods, he knows he can't really say anything in here either, too many ears, too many eyes. But he has been holding this in for a while, all of his emotions and thoughts building up over the past weeks.   

He wanted to talk through it, even just a little. "Okay. Where then?”

One of your hotel rooms was the obvious answer. But there was no way you were even going to consider that, not after what you two had already done together. It was too dangerous, too much could happen between you two if you were allowed to have each other all to yourselves.

You think. “There’s a pool here right? I’ll find out when it closes.” 

Sitting on the pool deck, outside, in public, seemed like a much safer location for you and Oscar’s impending conversation. Even if it was closed and no one was there, there was always the threat of someone showing up, passing by. Private enough to say what you needed to say, public enough to control yourselves. “I’ll text you when. Then just meet me there,” you tell him. 

Oscar was surprised that you suggested a place that was even more public. But it was a good solution because you are right. If your conversation was in a closed-off room somewhere, then there was always the chance that one of you would let yourself get carried away again. 

In a public space, with even the smallest probability of someone coming by, you two would be forced to keep your distance. 

"Alright," Oscar says, standing up and leaving the lobby.

-

to: Oscar Piastri

11:45pm.

from: Oscar Piastri (1 new message)

11:45.

-

The time comes and you slip into the pool area, trying to be discreet considering that it’s closed. And because you're meeting Oscar. He’s already here sitting on the edge of the pool. 

When you arrive, he looks straight at you, there is no need to try hiding anything right now. The whole situation was already obvious and you both knew what conversation was incoming, what it was going to be about. 

You don’t say anything as you walk over. Neither does he. You sit down next to him and put your feet in the pool, he does the same and keeps his legs straight so he doesn't accidentally touch your legs. There is a small amount of space between you two and you both stay quiet. 

“So…” you don’t know what to say. He seemed like he had something to get off of his chest in the lobby. You should just tell him to spit it out, but you don’t want to be hostile. Be mean. The whole situation is really fucking with your head already but you don’t want to make it seem like he’s the only one with feelings to express. Things to say. Just because you've been avoiding him, you've been better at acting like it didn’t happen, didn't mean you weren't constantly thinking about that night, thinking of him.

You can see he's not entirely sure where to start either. "Can we just skip all the bullshit and not pretend like we don't know what is going to be discussed in this conversation?" Oscar asked, just being blunt from the start. His eyes looking straight into yours, they were piercing, it showed to you that he was serious about discussing this right away.

You're taken aback by his response. You weren't expecting him to be so forward, maybe you should have. 

“Fine.” You turn and look at him. He should be the one to speak his peace first. He’s the one who pushed for this meeting back in the lobby. But you're sick of avoiding the confrontation. You'll confess first. 

“Oscar, I don’t regret Monaco. If I'm being honest with myself, I want it to happen again. But don’t you understand why I say it can’t happen again? You’ve been here, almost every step of my career. You know how hard it’s been for me. Not just in the car. And it’s stupid that it would be a big deal if we got together. Stupid that people are going to use it as a way to justify not taking me seriously. But you know it will happen. Just those pictures of us in Monaco were hell for me.” I pause and look forward. “And I don’t want to sneak around. Watch my back every time we are together.” You move your feet through the water.

Oscar listens to you with an intense look on his face.

“I understand. And you’re right, they’re always going to talk,” he responds. You look at him. “It’s inevitable. It’s not fair. But that’s how we’re living. I know you're concerned about your career and reputation, but you’re at the top. You’re a great driver. So fuck them," he says looking back at you.

You sit quietly, waiting for him to continue. 

“I’m sick of pretending like my feelings don’t exist, I don’t care if everyone talks about me and our relationship or rumors or whatever, I don’t have anything to prove to anyone.” The floodgates are open now. 

“I want to try. If you’ve already made up your mind and you’re done with this, then cut me lose now.“

Your mind is working overtime. You're trying to process his words and process your reaction to them. You know he’s right. If you keep running from relationships because you're scared of what people think, you're going to be alone until you retire. But your mind still runs to headlines. *McLaren and Red Bull. Competitors or Lovers?*. It’s not just the fans, the media. What about your teams? There’s no way things won’t get uncomfortable.

Oscar can tell your mind is racing, it's hard to take everything in so suddenly. If something were to happen between the two of you, you were right, a lot would change. 

But Oscar believed it was worth a shot. 

“What happened between us was only one night. But usually when people feel how we’r– I’m feeling, they get to explore that...” Oscar cringes slightly at his words. He's saying exactly what he means, but it sounds so corny out loud. 

“What I’m trying to say is that we could decide to actually spend more time together. Give us a shot. And it's a real possibility it just doesn’t work.” He looks up, trying to find the rest of the words to verbalize what he’s feeling. “But we can’t know that unless we try.”

He finishes his speech and looks away, his head lowered. The words were finally out there, there was no hiding from those feelings anymore. 

You can't find any words. He cannot look at you. All you two can do is sit there, waiting for the other to make the next move.

You look at the side of his face. His freckles and moles you had once traced. His hair. It was messy again, maybe he was running his hands through it before you got here. You continue staring at him, just examining.

Eventually, you look back at the pool. You sit for a moment before moving your feet in the water, tapping Oscar's next to you. 

He felt your foot lightly touch him in the water. He looks into the pool and he gives a small smile. His eyes travel to your leg, close to his now, and he pushes his lightly back into you. 

You still aren’t looking at each other as your legs keep touching in the pool. And now you can feel his hand nearly touching yours, and you inch it closer. You feel his slight touch back as your pinkies are now intertwined. 

It was so still and so quiet. All you could hear was the slight trickle of water, your legs and hands lightly touching, and the occasional small breeze that came by. 

You don’t know how long it's been when you finally turn to Oscar. He’s still looking at the pool. Your heart is beating faster and faster and you've made your decision. Is it the right one? Is there even a right decision in this situation? You don’t know. 

You move your hand away, your pinkies no longer intertwined. 

Oscar felt you move away, feeling a tinge of pain, it seemed like you decided to leave. 

He stays still, facing the pool. 

You linger for a second before you begin to trace your fingers on his back and up along his neck.

He looks over at you when you do this. Now that he's facing you, you run your fingers through his hair and rest a hand on his face, your thumb caressing his cheek. 

Oscar shudders slightly as your fingers go through his hair, it's such a tender and sweet gesture. His breathing started to slow, the tension that had built up this whole time and throughout this conversation was now subsiding. He can feel you gently touching his face and it feels so natural.

His hand now finds your face, lightly brushing a piece of hair behind your ear and then resting on the back of your neck. You turn your body more completely now, bringing one of your legs out of the pool, bent in between you two, while the other still floats.

Oscar feels your leg come out of the pool and is placed in between the two of you, the both of you are practically pressed together now. 

You feel his hand caress the back of your neck, as he draws you closer to him. You lean closer too. No words have been exchanged but it’s clear you've both made your decision. It’s almost as if with your simple action of leaning closer, a secret agreement between the two of you was silently accepted.

Your heads are touching now, your legs pressed tight between the two of you. No words need to be spoken to prove it, something had happened and now it was time for you both to embrace it.

You kiss him. Finally. 

He kisses you back.

Maybe this was the wrong decision. Maybe not. Either way, right now you and Oscar couldn't care less. All you wanted in this moment was him. All he wanted was you. The worries of being caught, the reactions of fans, your teams, and the media, and the fear that whatever this is would just be a fling, dissolved in the kiss. You were the only two people who mattered at this moment, the only ones who knew how you were feeling and what you had gone through just to be in each other's arms again. 

And as Oscar pulls you closer and smiles into the kiss, you know for a fact that this is the best decision you've ever made. 

-

f1gossipofficial

Liked by user4337 and 98,963 others f1gossipofficial McLaren's Oscar Piastri and Red Bull's Y/n Y/l/n spotted together again in the night leading up to the qualifying sessions of the Belgian Grand Prix.

view all 54,041 comments

landonorris oh wow (deleted by author)

a/n: the end 😄 they are such idiots, how are you about to get caught AGAIN after your whole plan was to be incongnito!

[mrstsugikuni]

Hi! I was one of the people who had sent an ask! Basically I had asked for a Muzan x f!reader, collge au. I had thought of Y/N losing a bet to her friends and having to kiss Muzan as a punishment. However, Muzan wants more and they end up in bed together?

Thanksss💓

Ooooooo yes yes yes yess 😍😍

I'ma have a lot of fun with this one 💪🏻

Warnings: Oral sex(Reader receiving), vaginal sex, creampie, unprotected sex, and a possible breeding kink.

MINORS DNI!!

'What did I get myself into.. I can't believe I lost to a dumb bet and now I have to kiss Muzan.. literally the hottest guy on our campus!' I thought to myself as sweat dropped from my face class was about to be over meaning I would have to face my punishment.

There it was the bell, everyone rushed out the room except for me I was still a little nervous and don't get me wrong I've had a crush on Muzan since freshman year back in high school but he got a little distant when we got in college he's always busy so I can understand but now I have to kiss him and I was scared he would feel different and reject the kiss, but I have to do this.

I silently made my way to where he usually was over by the campus doors and before I approached him I turned around just to see my friends watching behind a tree giggling like little girls who just go their favorite doll for Christmas.

"Hey! [Name] haven't seen you in forever how have ya been?" His voice was deep yet calm and it was just so dreamy I missed his voice so much and hearing it is like music to my ears. "Oh! I've been great Muzan, and you?" I smiled at him with adoration, he was just so perfect. "Oh same old same old, always busy with something, did you need something?" That's when I remembered, The bet! The punishment! Oooh the punishment.

"Yeah actually. Um could you maybe come a little closer I have a secret for you." He nodded and leaned over to hear your "secret" and before he could get closer to your ear you kissed him. His whole face went into a state of shock before sinking into the kiss, his right hand latched behind your head and his left was on your waist keeping you in place the kiss was passionate and spicy blanded together.

After a while he pulled back a smirk plastered apon his beautiful features, his red cherry eyes staring into yours love was in his eyes but there was something else In those eyes there was something more sinister lying between his eyes. "Y'know skipping never harmed anyone especially if it was just once." His deep voice sent shivers down your spine as lust sugar coated it's way on his tongue. "I suppose just once is a innocent crime." You looked him up and down and smirked he chuckled at he wrapped his arm around you and guided you to his apartment, as the two of you walked off you flipped off your friends who were now shocked at what just happened.

Not even a second into his apartment and he was all on you leaving love bites all over your neck as he left his mark on your soft skin, the whole up the elevator was nothing but the firey passion y'all felt for each other, His lips were addictive and sweet and you couldn't get enough he was like a drug to you and you wanted more.

When the elevator stopped at his floor he picked you up, your legs wrapped around him as he ran down to his room, giggles filled the halls as he continued to run with you in his hands the giggles only stopped and we're instead replaced by a loud thud. He threw you against his room door as he struggled to get the right key out.

When the door finally opened, he took no hesitance in slamming it and running to his room and throwing you on the bed. He stopped for a while and took in the beautiful view he had of you, it was magnificent he loved every inch of your body and couldn't wait to see it with out clothes. He began to take his shirt off his toned body was a sight for sore eyes he was gorgeous, you went to repeat what he did but he stopped you. "Allow me." He grabbed the hem of your shirt and slowly pulled it off, he pulled you close to his chest as he reached over your body and unclipped your bra letting it fall to the floor your boobs pressed against his chest as the passion in your eyes grew by the moment. He slowly placed you back on the bed before kneeling in front of the bed and where your clothes vagina played, he slowly took off [Clothing wear of choice] exposing your soaked panties it looked like a pool down there and he enjoyed every inch of it, before pulling your panties down as well. He stared at it for what seemed like forever not giving it any physical contact and it made you feel embarrassed. He continued to stare at it a little longer until his lips made contact with your sensitive bud sending chills up your spine from the sudden contact, his tongue danced with your clit making you feel so good and warm inside, as sweet noises erupt from your throat your hand finding it's way into his black locks and gripping it, a little a grunt could be heard as he continued to lick and suck your clitoris at a rhythm.

You can feel tight knot in your stomach as you arrive towards your climate. Your body shook out of control as the knot came undone, catching Muzan off guard as your juices covered his face. "Perhaps give me a warning next time?" He said chuckling right after taking his hand and wiping away the slick from his face.

He stood up from the kneeling position he was in, his hands reaching for his belt and the sound of metal touching as he unbuckles his belt. His eyes never leaving yours as a staring competition was started. Without even noticing his pants were lying on the floor next to him and he was stroking his cock right in front of you, his smirk only growing as he watched your eyes widen and your face turn red. He stopped stroking it and began crawling on top of you asserting his dominance. His lips leaving kisses all over your neck as he slowly aligned his cock to your pussy, Without warning he pushed his way in, just his tip was in and you knew you were in for a ride, he slowly kept making his way in sinking his cock through your tight walls. Suddenly with a swift movement he was all the way in and you felt so full, it didn't last long as you felt him slowly pull out, Your whines filled the room from the loss of his cock that was until he slammed back in and a loud yelp echoed through the room, he repeated that action keeping a rough yet slow pace. Skin slapping against skin, moans, grunts, groans, and pants were the only things that could be heard. Suddenly he flipped you over, your stomach facing the bed but your body kept upwards and your back was arched deliciously, he loved this position. Now he has access to everything better, He wasn't being slow and rough anymore he was being fast and rough his pace never resting and only getting faster. He was getting close to his climax and so we're you, his thrust were starting to get sloppy yet he kept his pace the same your moans getting more broken, your eyes were lost in the ceiling and drool ran from the corner of your mouth you were lost in pure euphoria and so was he. Yet again the knot in your stomach came undone all over his cock and your moans got so loud you knew the neighbors could hear, just hearing that moan led him to his climax, his semen filing you up from deep inside your walls painting it a lovely white color.

He kept himself inside until he knew his semen would stay in there, slowly pulling out before going to the bathroom to clean himself and prepare you two a nice warm bath to relax in.

Ok ok oml! I hope this was good cause like I had to rush it a little at the end cause I have to do stuff but I think it was really good!

OOOH I SHOULD SO DO AFTER CARE HEADCANONS FOR THE UPPER MOONS 😍😍

[pablitogavii]

I'm sorry..

Summary: It's your birthday and you ex boyfriend (Pablo Gavi) crashes the party desperate to get you back.

Pairing: Pablo Gavi x Reader

Warnings: slight angst/ slight smut/ fluffy ending I promise <3

It was your eighteenth birthday and all of your friends came to celebrate at your house making a big pool party with music and the whole light show. They really tried hard to make everything perfect in order to show you that you are never alone.

You haven't been the best recently, especially with your latest break up with your boyfriend of three years. Things got intense, he started losing games and all that pent up frustration was causing your relationship to break...caused him to break it.

Flashback:

"I can't do this right now! We are losing very game and I keep having to deal with this relationship! I can't!" Pablo was yelling after a terrible loss at El Clásico and you just stood there taking it despite knowing you didn't deserve any of it.

"You're acting like.." he interrupted you while growling angrily

"Acting like what?" he challenged

"Maybe you just want me to be as unhappy as you are..." you sigh feeling his hand taking yours and hold it tightly.

"I would never wish that on you..I want you to be happy but I don't know how to make you happy. Recently, I can't do anything right!" Pablo said letting go while Pedri observed the whole thing knowing that his friend will be absolutely miserable without you.

"It's over, isn't it?" you say as tears fall down your cheeks and Pablo kept a cold exterior although his heart was shattering into millions of small pieces.

"It's over.." he said and you left walking past Pedri as he sat down where you were some moments ago seeing his friend drying his own tears.

"Pablo, why did you just do that?" Pedri asked

"Because I love her..and I can't make her happy" Pablo said through gritted teeth as his friend hugged him tightly letting him cry into his shoulder.

You were dating the new guy after five months of daily grief but even now you go to sleep thinking about Pablo's arms wrapping around you. You knew it's not fair to your boyfriend but you couldn't help it..nobody will ever be what Pablo was to you.

"You look breathtaking Y/n.." Luca said and you smiled kissing his lips feeling immediate guilt only seconds later..this was the first birthday without Pablo by your side..it felt wrong..everything felt wrong since he left.

"He's here..just wait and we will ask him to leave" Ana, your best friend, said and you felt your breathing stop as your eyes filled with tears. Luca wanted to go with her but you stopped them both saying that you needed to see him, be the one to ask him to leave.

You walked down the stairs while Pablo was being held by Pedri looking up with big red eyes taking in every detail from your tight red dress, to your curls cascading perfectly down your shoulders and perl necklace around your neck..you looked heavenly..he couldn't breathe.

"What are you doing here? I need you to leave Pablo.." you said after finally standing across from him seeing his eyes filled with tears which broke something in you but you had to keep a strong exterior..your heart was pounding hard against your chest.

"It's your birthday princesa...it's my princesa's birthday" his voice broke and you could tell that he was drunk holding onto the wall as your head became heavy at the sound of that nickname.

"I'm not yours anymore.." you said and that exact moment Luca walked down pulling you to his side making sure you are feeling alright since you were really pale.

"Get off her! Hijo de puta! Don't touch her! She is mine! She..she is mine!" Pablo was trying to rush towards Luca while you were crying and Pedri pulled him back trying to sober him up.

"We should leave hermano..let's not ruin her birthday..you want her to be happy, don't you? I know you do..come on..let's go..lo siento amiga" Pedri was pulling Pablo's helpless body but just as they arrived at the door he pulled back now absolutely enraged.

"Ask her! Ask her if she loves you!? Do you!? Do you love him? I know you don't! And you know you don't! You're still shaking when I get close ...when I touch you...you're still mine in here!" Pablo said touching your heart and Luca was looking down at you expecting you to say something..to say anything but you were silently crying before Pablo turned around and left with Pedri.

"Is he telling the truth? Y/n!" Luca was yelling at you now and instead of this being one of the happiest days, it quickly became a nightmare. You were so overwhelmed and hurt that you don't even remember the words leaving your mouth.

"Yes! I love him! I can't stop! I..I'm sorry.." you cried rushing upstairs to take off your dress and get underneath the cowers while your friend told everyone the party was over and they left the house.

"I cleaned everything up..I'm sorry baby" Ana said kissing your head before heading home herself leaving you alone to think on everything that happened.

Your birthday was almost over, it was ten minutes till midnight, and all you could think about was the way Pablo looked at you as you walked down the stairs..those eyes showing you more emotion than Luca's words ever could...Pablo loved you despite all the complications that cluttered your relationship...he loved you.

A knock on the door brought you back from your thoughts and you walked down seeing him standing in the hallway with the largest bouquet of red roses in his hands. Your heart was beating fast and you felt your tears fall down your cheeks again.

"What are you doing here again? I don't have the energy to rehash tonight's hysterics..you won..Luca left..and I'm alone..I think you should leave" you said coldly still feeling anger than he selfishly ruined your birthday.

"I'm not here to apologize for what happened tonight.." he said giving you the flowers and you still took them waiting to what he had to say.

"Then...what are you here to apologize for?" you say smelling the roses smiling weakly before looking back into his sparkling eyes.

"Everything else...I'm sorry for losing my temper the night after losing El Clásico..I'm sorry for not calling you for months...I'm sorry for treating you like property..I'm sorry I didn't tell you I loved you when I knew I did..most of all, I'm sorry that I gave up on us when you never did.." he said and by that time you were already crying surely looking like a crazy racon with smeared mascara.

You sighed in relied giving him a small smile while holding roses tightly like your life depended on it.

"Thank you..' you said in a quiet voice putting flowers on the table as he slowly walked towards you almost like he was checking if you would walk back..but when you didn't his hands found your hips and he pulled you into a tight embrace.

"All I needed all these months is to be in your arms again...to feel safe" you whispered while you were till standing there hugging one another feeling Pablo's hands rub your back soothingly just like he knew you loved.

"Please come back to me princesa...I can't function without you..I don't want to learn how to live without you" he said and you moved back looking up at his tearful eyes before your gaze focused on his lips instead.

He leaned down crashing his lips on your and you kissed him back snaking your arms around his neck and pulling him closer as the clock hit midnight in just the right moment.

"My birthday is over.." you said as you pulled away from one another resting your foreheads together for the next few moments.

"I think I still need to give you my gift.." he said and you opened your eyes to look at him giggling a little when he swopped you from your feet and carried you upstairs bridal style back into your room giving you something you both craved since the night you separated...

[ashwhowrites]

Aww you're angst is so good but could we get like an cute sensitive reader with eddie where eddie is his normal self but when he's around his friends he acts differently so one day he says something that hurts the readers feelings and he truly didn't mean to he had no idea that what he said would hurt her feelings and the whole time she's hanging out with him she's trying her best not to cry and she even excuses herself to the bathroom to give herself like a little pep talk and when they leave he notices she's quiet and seems sad so she asks if he meant what he said earlier 😔

I love a cute sensitive reader

Not proofread

I struggled with the ending so bare with me

Hehe I wrote this and completely just missed the part where they weren't supposed to be at home....but they are at Eddie's

Eddie had a big mouth, everyone knew that. He said exactly what popped in his head, not bothering to read the room or his audience. If he had a thought, he would share it. Whether the thought was good or bad.

Y/N understood Eddie didn't exactly think before he spoke. It was one of his flaws and a flaw that hurt many people. She always brushed off certain things he said to her about things she likes. He wasn't a fan of her favorite movies, food or music. He shared his opinions on it bluntly but she shrugged it off. She didn't like his favorite movies or his music either. She just never told him. She was too sensitive herself to purposely hurt someone's feelings.

That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt sometimes. Especially when her boyfriend was sitting with his friends in the living room, laughing about their ex-girlfriends and their flaws. Y/N was scared for Eddie's turn, she's the only person he's ever been with. She was sitting in his room, allowing him to have a guy night. But now she sat against his door, ear pressed as she nervously bit her lip. She hoped he would use his brain and talk about how he doesn't have an ex-girlfriend so he doesn't need to be part of the conversation.

But he didn't. He didn't want to be excluded so he said the first thing that popped in his head.

"yeah Y/N can be very loud. Like just in general, doesn't need to be sex" He joked. Smiling as the boys laughed. Eddie felt proud he was able to be part of the conversation. He hated being shut out.

Y/N nodded to herself from the other side of the door. He was right, she was loud. During sex or not, her voice generally was louder than the rest. But so was Eddie. Eddie was loud so she figured she'd never have to feel insecure about it.

She sat down at his dirty desk, looking in his mirror, cringing as she saw the first round of tears

"hey, no! No crying. You are fine. It is fine" she said to herself. Cleaning off her face as fast as she could.

"nothing to cry over. You are loud but that doesn't need to be a bad thing. Who cares if he thinks it's a flaw. It's you just being you. If he has a problem with it, he can go to hell" she snapped to herself in the mirror.

She spent too many years allowing people to break her down. She was sensitive but that didn't mean she would let people's words continue to make her insecure. She liked being loud.

~~

But her speech went out the window when she cuddled into Eddie's arms as they relaxed for bed. She wanted to tell him off, tell him he wasn't exactly quiet either, and he wasn't quiet during sex either!

Even though she didn't want to, she felt insecure. Biting her cheek to keep words from flying out. Maybe if she just didn't talk at all, she wouldn't be reminded of how loud she was.

"what's wrong?" Eddie broke the silence, his thumb rubbing her shoulder softly as he hummed out into the air

"hm?" She hummed, lips closed tightly as she kept her eyes closed

"you've been quiet ever since the guys left. You never came out to play games and you haven't said a word to me since" Eddie explained, looking down at her. She kept her eyes closed and breathing steady but he knew she was awake

"nothing. Just tired" she shrugged off

"no you're not. You had coffee like an hour ago. You won't be sleeping for hours. Tell me what's wrong" he demanded, pulling his arms away as he sat up. Eyes looking down at her, finally making eye contact when she opened hers

"did you mean it? My big flaw?" She asked quietly, well as quiet as she could. Barely a whisper as Eddie leaned closer to try to hear her

"what? I can't hear you" he chuckled, moving closer

"oh now I'm too quiet?" She snapped, rolling her eyes as she sat up

"hey what's going on?" Eddie asked, flinching slightly at how pissed she sounded

"my big flaw? Too loud? You know what Eddie you aren't fucking quiet either" she growled

She tried to seem mad but Eddie could easily tell how sad she looked

"baby, you're right. I'm way louder than you are. And that was stupid to even say. It was dumb to try and fit in when my girlfriend doesn't even have a flaw. Something I should be rubbing in their faces. I'm not going to ask for forgiveness because I should work to fix this but just know I am sorry" he said, kissing her cheek softly

"good because I wasn't gonna forgive you yet" she giggled, kissing his cheek as she laid back down

Eddie laughed and laid next to her, wrapping her in his arms

"I am sorry. And I will tell the boys that I'm much louder in the bedroom" he smirked

"good" she said, smacking his chest as she closed her eyes.

~~

Together they will be the loudest couple in every room

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns

[shiraishi-kanade]

Interactions that I want to see in proseka: An Shiraishi edition

Buckle up, folks. This is gonna be a long one.

New interactions

An & Kanade: this is actually more of a biased one (in a "I want to see two of my favourite characters interact" way), but I really hope to see more of them. An and Kanade are aware of each other's existence through Mizuki and the Twilight Festival event, but it's very surface level and I really want their potential to be explored more.

Despite appearing very different on the surface level and leading very different lifestyles, An and Kanade have been foils to each other basically since launch. They both grew up surrounded by music; they both have, and have shown since a very young age, a prominent talent in it (singing and composing respectively); they're both extremely passionate about what they do and are very hardworking, to the point of sacrificing their own well-being to it (a trait that, interestingly, more like early Kanade, but more recent An), and they also have a shared topic of grief.

Both An and Kanade suffered a loss of a loved one that impacted them deeply, and both of them choose to, at least to some extent, repress their own feelings regarding that. While I don't think their interaction/event should necessarily touch on that topic, I think it would be good for the both of them to have a friend who can relate to something that horrifying and personal.

(Additionally, while we didn't know what killed Kanade's mom, we know it was some kind of illness, and chances are it'll be same/similar to what killed Nagi. If Kanade shared how it was for her to witness her mom slowly fading away... I think that would make for an interesting conversation.)

Honestly, I'd take just about anything with those two, from grief and angst to composing and potentially even light-hearted event like Spojoy Park. I just really want them to meet properly.

An & Emu: Genki girls!! They are very dear to me personally despite not having met properly yet. They're also the reason I'm upset An has moved on from disciplinary committee: missed opportunity for her to catch Emu sneaking in! They would be fun to be around each other, I think, once An would get used to Emu's manner of speech (which she also somewhat shares, as shown in Nuanced Language sidestory. An being able to understand Emu-language from the get go would be a hilarious twist)

On the more serious note! Emu and An have a lot of shared themes, especially those of loneliness and abandonment issues, and also the way they chose to deal with those feelings. A lot of people say they're suppressing their emotions; I'm rather inclined to say they're avoiding them. If faced with each other who are, in a way, a reflection of their flaws, they might not be able to avoid it anymore - I think that would potentially be a very insightful interaction for them.

Moreover, they (along with a couple other characters, like Touya and Kanade, although for them it's much more minor) share the topic of legacy. Both of them lost a close one that has left behind a dream and both of them, voluntarily, stepped up to keep it alive. I think in that regard An and Emu would be able to understand each other in a very unique way. They have way more to their possible friendship than it seems on a surface level.

An & Mafuyu: one of An's most defining character traits is being a good friend and accepting of everyone - more than that, she earnestly believes she could accept all people if she tried hard enough. I think, for Mafuyu, having a friend, or even an acquaintance like that, someone who is put off by her behaviour and overall mannerisms but actively tries to understand her and be friends with her despite that, as well as someone who is so passionate about a dream she has she build her whole life around it, would be very useful.

(this is also the reason I hold a grudge with 2024 White Day event. It's beautiful and fun and all but An's not had a limited card for over a year and haven't had neither Valentine's nor White day, I thought FOR SURE this one. We could have had it all :( )

An & Saki: similar to An and Emu, both of them have a lot of both serious and comedic potential. They're lively, they're athletic, they're passionate about music - there is no feasible reason for them to not hit it off right away when they meet. I don't quite imagine the rest of their groups being able to keep up with their energy.

Still, underneath that energy, there is an underlying topic of loneliness that they both went through, and although An's is incomparable to Saki's, I think there would be this kind of understanding between them, too. While being extroverted and having a lot of friends, An has spend years searching for "her" person without success up until main story. I don't think she had any actual, deep bonds with peers going on in her life aside Haruka. Having a close-knit, big friend group might just be what both An and Saki have missed out on in middle school. That's an interesting observation, isn't it?

More of That, please (Already know each other but I want to see them More)

An & Haruka: in terms of Haruka and An, I really want to see more backstory for them. I know we've already seen it briefly, but there is so much more to it. How close were they? Did Haruka know Nagi in person or from description? What is Haruka's relationship with Vivid Street? Did she go to WEG to sort her thoughts out because An was there, or because it has a connection to her, too (The Non-Idol Me sidestory)? Did they grow more distant throughout Junior High? There is much to unpack here still!

And also, I just like their friendship overall and think we're really lacking their area interactions and accidental meetings, stuff like that. There should definitely be more.

An & Rui: the sillies. Now that An isn't a hall monitor I expect her to take absolute delight in Rui's antics.

They've performed together a total of three times (if we count the New Year show, even though it was more of a Tsukasa stage) and all of them went spectacularly. An is just the right amount of impulsive and reckless to be someone who's able to meet Rui's ideas halfway and match his energy, even though she's normally skeptical about it when she isn't a part of the performance. Hell, An even jokingly mentions becoming an actress!

I think they definitely should interact more and I want it to be utterly ridiculous. It's a shame it didn't happen a little earlier in Rui's story, but, for example, An (together with some other characters) doing acting gigs for Rui could be extremely fun.

An & Tsukasa: both the comedic and the serious angst potential is there; An's and Tsukasa's recent arcs do align quite nicely even though they're not exactly the same. They could probably have a nice conversation about it.

I think it's also fun to see An not realising that she comes off just as loud and pushy to other people as Tsukasa seems to her. But they definitely do have the same energy! I really liked Let's Study Hard and the New Year's Show for that; they're extremely passionate and Tsukasa admires An's passion and skill - I wish they elaborated on this more!

Also, An should definitely have something going on with Tsukasa with her passing the role of the hall monitor to him, especially with Rui around. No way they won't even mention it.

An & Shiho: they had an awesome time together during the In The Corner of Resonant Town and I'm BEGGING for them to get closer as friends. From fashion sense to music to their personal issues, they have a lot in common. I think they've had their share of deep talks and I'm not exactly looking for that anymore; something more relaxed like a jam session or just hanging out is another thing, thought.

An & Ichika: I'm biased in a way that I love them and I also think it would be very funny for Ichika to have a second vocal teacher. Ichika & Nene are very dear to my heart, but as things stand, An should canonically be more skilled in vocals (while Nene is definitely a superior actor) and her skillset probably fits Ichika's genre better. And An was teaching Kohane at the start, so we know she knows how to! There is no particular motive behind it other than I want to see them together more and I think that would be a perfect way for them to get closer.

Additionally, Shiho mentioned how An must be experienced in MCing and how there must be a lot they can learn from her. That. I want that to happen so badly.

An & Nene: no thought head empty just please more of them. Especially singing. I want them to sing together again, I loved hearing Nene's little monologue and I like the way Nene was able to give An tips on acting and singing while acting; they're extremely sweet, they're polar opposites while also being similar in a bizarre way, and I really want the writers to go all in with the classmates thing.