#especially on here like wtf runs through some peoples heads

[girlwithadragonheart]

I need to yap desperately about one single gripe I have with this game. MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD read at your own discretion

The first half is me ranting about how much certain things mean to me and how impacted I was, and the actual gripe comes closer to the end.

I'll preface this by saying this post is about Varric's death and my rage and despair regarding it, but more so about my Rook's.

I've seen people who said they picked up on the hints about whatnot, who knew before the Fade Prison. I was not one of those people. I was so relieved when I saw him after the Prologue that I didn't think twice, because I knew that it would destroy me the second shit started going wrong.

I was already not having a good time when I started the game simply because Varric was getting older. I don't handle aging well or death, and his design showing his age, and the comments he would make about "getting too old for this" just made my heart break.

And then shit got worse. I sobbed disgustingly when that knife went into Varric's chest.

After Rook woke up from talking to Solas and she heard Varric, I was so gods damned relieved. And my Rook was better taken care of by Varric in that year she spent with him than she was in the rest of her entire life.

I cried from the end of Ghilan'nain's fight until the romance scene and on and off after that. I got so used to visiting Varric just to be comforted by his presence. Inquisition was the biggest part of my life for a year and a half when I was just a kid.

I did really bad middle school age writing for it but regardless of the quality, those characters were built up in my head becoming even more than they were in the game. Varric was my biggest support character through everything I was going through at the time.

I don't talk about it much, but I didn't have a great childhood, and I know a lot of people didn't, but I coped with it through writing and video games. Varric was the one supporting me through the abuse I suffered and writing was the way I processed how bad things really were.

When Rook was in the prison she said "What am I going to find here?" And Varric said "I think you already know, kid." I DIDN'T until he said that. The second he said that my entire chest tightened and I just said "No" out loud as I watched Rook find his body.

Now for my real complaint!!!

Rook never gets the chance to grieve Varric. They go from talking to him every day to finding out he's dead and it was all a lie. I have personally never been more fucking pissed at Solas than I am now. But Rook comes back and they have that kind of "closing off" scene with Varric's empty bed (which was so hard to go through btw). And then they fuck their pookie LIKE I CANNOT BE THE ONLY ONE UPSET ABT THAT

FYM I gotta find out my dad is dead and then Rook is up for boning like there's no fucking way unless it's to cope. And at least pertaining to the Lucanis romance, Rook is processing everything that happened and they can say "So much has happened, I just don't know how to feel."

And rather than getting to process that in some kind of way, the devs said nah this scene serves one singular purpose, and Lucanis says "I do" and then dicks them down.

Personally, I felt very dismissed despite being overjoyed about finally having the romance scene, I couldn't even enjoy it with everything that happened prior.

Rook deserved the chance to completely break down after everything they went through. Tbh i don't know how they kept it together. Varric said "don't get all misty eyed" and i thought to myself that's way too delicate a term for what's happening here, I was fully ugly crying.

Fuck your "I had a good run" I still need you bitch.

All this to say I'm very upset, and I'm running my second playthrough and every time I look at, hear, or talk to Varric I tear up again. Wtf Bioware.

Rook should've gotten the chance to actually talk about what Solas did to them, especially in the sense that he made them believe Varric was still there. Or at least get to properly grieve the person who was their closest friend for a long time.

I have very strong feelings about this obviously

[plegg-culture-is]

Fannish plegg carton culture, specifically protogenic-endogenic plegg culture that later finds itself to be full of permanent resident soulbonds is —

In very very early childhood:

*Projections literally playing H.O.R.S.E or whatever that basketball game is. Of course the main fronter never played, because they are too short.*

"Huh!! Well I mean those barbecue sauce was spicy before but it's 0.05 seconds later and I feel completely different as a person and also this barbecue sauce is no longer spicy. Oh well. The teacher called me a liar over barbecue sauce so I'm gonna be a shithead to them and have a meltdown"

In middle school:

"What would Gohan do if he was in this world???"

"What would Jayfeather do if he were in this world??"

"OMG. WHAT WOULD. IZAYA ORIHARA DO IF HE WAS IN THIS SITUATION JIST SOME MIDDLE SCHOOLER NOW"

*Has full-ass slow changing "see through my eyes" quasi-ceremonies based solely on vibes since we didn't have innerworld completely built yet*

*Chasing each other in hallways and all people saw was a small autistic child running for no reason lol*

"Why the fuck can I never feel my face when something horrible happens to us me? Also I relate too much to Silver from Pokémon HeartGold/SoulSilver"

In high school:

"Yep just Gon and Killua from Hunter×Hunter chillin' over there. Nobody can see 'em and these feel pretty distinct from hallucinations considering I can't literally see them. Eh. Maybe just imagination."

*Checking out a pro-endogenic blog in 2015* "Yup I am just a curious singlet"

*Still chasing ourselves through hallways just less or more hidden because people are stupid.* Why the fuck am I so angry all of the time. Why the fuck do I feel like there should be more to all of this.

"Hhhh Illumi Zoldyck from Hunter×Hunter patting my head is completely normal. So is pretending I am Ethan from Pokémon HeartGold/SoulSilver I'M NOT PRETENDING ThOUGH??? I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO CALL THIS all I know is I am definitely Ethan, , not Ethan? And Illumi Zoldyck is petting my head and we are working at a McDonald's right now. What the fuck is happening" *Proceeds to ignore this and never tell anyone until we are today years old*

"My vitriol for Hisoka Morrow of Hunter×Hunter has three sides to it. I hate him and his canon. I have no clue how to explain the other two sides to this and I cannot stand my friend obsessing over this character" *Proceeds to also ignore this one too, and never tell anyone until we are today years old*

In university:

"Hey 30 year old Gladion idk if you're actually a figment of my imagination anymore but yeah sure your sister Lily and her daughter Mei can chill in here in this brain for awhile. Does this mean I'm genderfluid lol?" (Narrator: this is, in fact, NOT what genderfluidity is supposed to feel like.)

"Oh well I guess Itonai from Assassination Classroom is just decided to sleep in the bed tonight. Get the fuck off of my bed ya lazy bum. Noooo it's just wei — get back in our head you freak (//lovingly, platonic)"

*Just feeling fucking uncomfortable around sysmedicalists but especially the sysmedicalists who were anti-endogenic as well (yes there are pro-endogenic sysmeds!! Uhm but definitely not plural, nope)*

"I am now talking to these projections while brushing my teeth. Lucifer from The Devil Is A Part-Timer has literally crash-landed into our brain along with Emilia Justina. Wtf?"

*Discovers the word endogenic yet again and gets the weird euphoria again*

*Maybe our late second year at university, at fucking 11PM, after anime club finishes — Kusuo Saki just fucking chilling on top of the table via projection* "Heeey so remember that one time in high school where you had weird daydreams about that pink-haired psychic boy and the blonde with drills? Welp, Mami Tomoe picked me up on the way here —" *Queue freakout of the main fronter at this point*

-----------

SO ANYWAYS that is. Uh. Some Stuff(tm) yaaay, anyways the good thing about this is we don't think our queer shit would ever, ever be as fucking weird as our plurality shit in the context of the societal context and chronological context we, Rusanya, live in, so figuring out we're aceplex (since we found the plurality first and asexuality is more of a veil) was mostly just an "AHA okay then lol" and we just kind of slap every label on the planet onto us that we like that we think applies, both on an individual and collective level. :D

.

[autisticethanmorgan]

How I would continue mbav in comic form

disney, teletoon, fresh tv, whoever the fuck owns the rights to this, please let me have them

LONG ASS POST WARNING

we are past the days of any further mbav television content, but you know what has a much lower production cost and would fill a specific niche? a comic/graphic novel continuation >:) Teen rating because pretty much anyone who was the target audience of mbav when it was airing is late teen or older and I want the characters actions to have more consequence, basically i want to injure my protagonists

I would pick up a month or two after the lucifractor explosion, establish the new status quo, we cant really do a continuation if they all died so Ill settle for injury and property damage, including putting out main man Ethan in a half magic/half head trauma induced coma! this is kind of a cheap story beat but i cant help it I love a coma and its a good opportunity for both sarah and benny to get a little bit darker and have some interesting character development, with the most important difference being that sarah basically gets through it and refuses to compromise her morals whereas benny is very lost without ethan being his moral compass and becomes more and more reckless with magic, eventually leading to him attempting a very risky spell to wake ethan up which does work but basically has sarah and his grandma like 'wtf is wrong with you'

meanwhile erica and rory are fucking around in the states bc this would be a very fun B plot for a while before they return, if youve read the comic crowded im thinking of that kind of vibe

so anyway ethan is back up and running now and everyone is kind of trying to get back to normal but its really hard and theres a lot of residual magic causing problems and making bennys magic more powerful, and its giving ethan basically constant migranes and really vague visions and horrifying dreams and all that good 'plauged with visions' stuff.

sarah and ethan have not gone on any more dates at this point so theyre not dating but they do have this kind of romantic aspect of their relationship and they basically havent talked about it since the explosion, kind of a silent understanding of like 'i love you and i dont really care that its platonic or romantic but i just understand whats happening in a way almost no one else can and Im here for you even if now just isnt the time for us'

benny is continuing to get more reckless and kind of vengeful with his magic use, testing his limits, using magic to get back and the people making snide comments in the halls, especially after ethan comes back to school, when your best friend is in a coma for two months you get kind of defensive about it I guess. If you’re not a bethan truther I’m sorry but Ethan can have two intense friendships that border on romantic, both of which are societally non conventional/acceptable. In fact he has to. It is so good narratively. but anyway at some point there is a particularly bad incident benny gets more vindictive than ever before and hurts this guy pretty badly till ethan is yelling at him to stop

at this point ethan and sarah and grandma are like 'uhhh benny is getting kinda intense' but they dont even know the half of it because secretly he learning magic that isnt in his book, researching on his own and making stuff up. the magic itself wants him to be getting stronger, its not like sentient but it does have kind of a self preservation instinct? like a power begets power type thing that magic users can very easily be driven mad by their own magic if theyre not careful or dont have another magic user telling them to touch grass.

i think benny can have unexamined mental repercussions due to his parents having either left him or died. as a treat. so when he get magic and suddenly he can control things he couldnt before yknow who can blame him for getting kind of lost, i personally would become insane. I havent really though about the specific of him devolving and mentally deteriorating. I dont want him to be too evil yknow? bc we will be letting him get redeemed latr bc im a sucker for that.

at this point erica and rory return from their wacky adventures bc this is no time for a silly b plot. and they are like huh benny got kind of weird and different and ethan is like haha no hes fine

he is not fine

he is actually sneaking out of town to meet another magic user who is basically like 'i will act like a father figure to gain your trust' and benny is like 'epic!' yknow because he. becuase. because he has no dad :D. he gets exposed to magic that grandma doesnt do and is both scared and impressed and this other magic user is like 'she doesnt want you to learn this >:| she doesnt want you to reach your fullest potential' and benny is like 'hmm idk about that' but they keep talking until this guy is like 'arent you tired of being nice?dont you just wanna go apeshit?' but benny is still like 'hmmm my really close boy best friend probably wouldnt like that' but its too late. its already in motion.

benny gets more evil. he is causing problems in whitechapel and does not seem to care. benny be like 'thought acquired: if i control everything and destroy the things i dont like then everything will be good and i can protect my friends forever. i see no moral problems with this' more development into evil, dont ask me the details i dont know.

bennys evil girl summer culminates in some kind of fight where ethan enters his mind bc yeah obviosly thats where this has been going, idk if ive just spent to long thinking about jean grey and scott summers but this is the most interesting thing ever. i want to see ethan walking through bennys memories end of life is strange style and realizing that all of his most important memories are of them together, times that theyve comforted or protected each other and it ends with a memory of from just before they met sarah. that memory fades out and ethan is standing on the street in front of his house, so he goes up to his room and benny is there but this time its really him and not just a memory version of him and benny is like 'i dont know how it got to be like this, this isnt what i wanted, how do i fix this?' and ethan is like 'i havent given up on you, you can still come back and we can try to make it right' and they hug and they come back to reality and benny basically breaks down sobbing yeah i <3 sad boys. he has a lot of regrets. ( i have written a lot of this scene bc i am insane and obsessed)

by the next morning hes left town. only leaving a note saying he needs to go away and clear the magic out of his head. hes reversed as much of the magic he did as he could, and left ethan with a spell leaving the words 'semper reveniam ad te' on his arm that will disappear when they see each other again or if benny dies.

[sallysellsseashellssundays]

 Disclaimer: This post is going to be Anti Moffat for anyone who’s reading and is a fan you’ve been warned.  

“A Good Man Goes to War” is the seventh episode and it was my least favorite episode to watch so far.

The Good: Amy being a companion that’s married and pregnant is a rather inspired and interesting storyline, but I just wish it didn’t have to be connected to River. Strax had some funny lines especially when he was talking about meeting in battle, I was sad to see him die. We caught a quick glimpse of the captain from a few episodes ago with his son, that was surprising! Amy and Rory had a beautiful moment together where Rory was talking about how he wanted to be cool regarding being a father, my favorite Amy/Rory moment so far.

The Bad: They kept insinuating with certain lines that the Doctor was the father, and I’m at a loss as to why that angle keeps getting pushed. Amy and Rory are married and the two actors have great chemistry with each other, it feels incredibly weird to keep pushing that narrative when you can have a lovely story about married companions traveling with the Doctor. The Marines that didn’t have names?? Umm it was such a weird moment pointing out they were fat/thin/gay etc. and then one gets his head cut off. 

The River: She breaks out of prison whenever she wants and lets her guards know when she’s breaking in, WTF, honestly what sort of prison is this?!? In S5 she was taken away in handcuffs (I think the Weeping Angels episode), the implication being that she was dangerous, and I’m pretty sure the story is that she kills the Doctor so I don’t understand why it’s so easy for her to do that. I’ll wait and see if that’s explained later, but Amy had more people keeping her in her cell in this episode than River ever does. I knew River was Amy’s daughter already, but I don’t know the fallout of the reveal.

The Worst: I like Matt’s portrayal but I’ve hated how the Doctor is written in S6. At the end of S4 he was distressed that his friends were fighting on his behalf even though it was their choice. Martha once said the lovely thing about the Doctor is that he doesn’t go around asking to be thanked, and it rubs me the wrong way that here he went to get people to help him because they have “debts” and he was raising an army. Amy said the Doctor always holds out on them regarding information and asked him not to this time as it involved their daughter, Eleven doesn’t seem to acknowledge her concern or explain anything and then just leaves!! Mind you, this is Amy who just went through a traumatizing situation and is supposed to be his best friend, he just never seems to genuinely care about her. The Captain and Madame Kovarian said at one point that it had been a month and the Doctor hadn’t showed up, I’d sincerely hoped for Amy’s sake that it wasn’t true because...he has a time machine! How could he just leave her there for a month?? When Ten went through the Midnight episode you don’t see him talking to Donna onscreen, but you can obviously tell that he told her what happened. In the episode with Jenny you see Ten and Donna walking together and he reveals he’s been a father before. It just feels like a very different character, Eleven is always running from place to place and never seems to talk to his friends. 

The Moffat: I can suspend my disbelief at times but there were a lot of poorly written moments in this episode. It seemed like they really wanted the Doctor dead but didn’t shoot him when he appeared instead leaving him to give a speech then as soon as he was gone a soldier went and shot a monk. Amy asked him if he has children when she said in “The Doctor’s Wife” episode that she knows about the time war. Why would she ask if she knows he’s the last of the Time Lords? They’re called the Headless Monks, why did it seem like it was supposed to be a huge deal that they are...headless?? They gave a speech about it and everything like it was a huge reveal lol. The Doctor’s “army” led  everyone away but they actually left behind a bunch of armed Monks? Rather conveniently Eleven brings the cot outside instead of them going into the TARDIS. Why was that done? Oh it’s because there’s going to be a force field leaving them unable to get to safety. If Amy went through such a horrifying situation to me it would seem to make the most sense that she would go inside the TARDIS asap to get some rest and they would all try to get to the Time Vortex immediately. Lorna meets the Doctor as a girl and becomes a soldier because she wanted to see him again--another repeating Moffat theme.

The Unresolved: Madame Kovarian’s motivation seems to be that there is a war against the Doctor, lets see what her next step is. In “The Doctor’s Daughter” Ten gives Jenny a very emotional speech about what it takes to be a Time Lord, I don’t know enough about the lore to understand how River has Time Lord DNA just from being conceived on the TARDIS, and it seemed even Eleven didn’t know. Amy and her Ganger were somehow still connected even though Eleven seemed to imply when his own Ganger was made that that’s when there was a sort of “split”, maybe that will be explained later. Was Vastra the same one from S5 I think Silurians were the species name?

Overall I felt very disappointed with the way this episode was written, and even if some things are explained later this was one of my least favorite episodes of the entire 5.5 seasons I’ve seen so far. Perhaps the worst thing for me was that I was bored watching it, that’s something that’s only very rarely happened. 

[theplotdoctor]

Ok, Gender Rant

A bit of a think piece about my relationship to gender that I wrote last night after reading some stuff sent me into a spiral. I'm sharing it in the hope that some people might find it useful. Warning: long post.

TW: Am I Trans Enough? WTF does that even feel like? Dysphoria, Masculinity, Femininity, Self Improvement 

So for the record, and if anyone didn't know I identify as gender fluid which is under the trans umbrella, any pronouns for me are fine, most days it's an.... internal state of being and varies a lot from situation to situation. And before I get started this is a vent post, comments and thoughts and opinions are very welcome, especially nuanced ones, but don't worry if you don't have space for it; a lot of this is me writing to sort out my own head, validation is a nice to have extra. 

So, I spent most of today writing out a roleplay plot for Transgender Awareness Week. I planned to put it up in as many places as possible, partly because it's a nice plot, but also because the "running this plot" section was about twice as long as the thing itself and contained some pretty good discussion points about trans representation in general and some that were specific to what I had written, hopefully it'd be thought provoking if nothing else. Great, all finished. However, I wanted to make it explicitly clear that one of the characters was a trans man. I didn't really have the space in the plot, nor is it written in the right style to put in markers like I would with a 20th century character, because ultimately it's not creative writing, it's a fantasy plot outline, that limits some options but opens up others. So I figured why not just outright state it? "The priest, a trans man..." kind of thing. Wasn't really an approach I'd seen taken, so I went to check if anyone had advice around it. 

I read half a dozen articles on writing advice around trans characters and didn't find an answer to my question. But what I did find threaded through all these articles about writing trans characters were discussions about "what being trans is". And I'm not knocking these articles they did a good job of explaining the basics of the basics for cis people. However there were things there that... just didn't jive with me and it sent me into a bit of a spiral.  

So about my gender. As I said before a lot of my gender fluidity is situational and internal. I've recently had occasion to look back over my own internet archive; and even though I only correctly identified my gender a few years ago, the signs were all there from a very early point. I have never felt a part of traditional masculinity, in the main its cultural touchstones are not interesting to me, and its toxicity is unappealing. There are however a few areas that did interest me and I invested in those. Equally I never felt particularly a part of traditional femininity, it had a few more appealing cultural touchstones, but again toxicity was an issue. 

Regarding my body I have some issues with localised dysmorphia coming from both ends. I have always hated my chest, my entire life I've had some extra tissue there that even at my most unhealthy 90s heroin chic refused to budge, it never felt like a "mans" chest (and no I don't have gynecomastia, frankly at points it's been imperceptible to anyone but me). Recently however I've found that I kind of enjoy the ability to, with a bit of boob tape and some make up give myself cleavage, so it can stay for now. I also don’t think that growing some permanent breasts would be the solution for me here, that would be too feminine and I’d hate that too.

Another issue I have is body hair. I have no problem particularly with my arm or leg hair, my armpits are fine and everyone has pubic hair, but my chest and stomach are another matter entirely. I hate my chest hair and the hair on my stomach, it was fine when I was a teenager until my early 20s when it fully grew in. It makes my torso look very much like a man’s torso and I hate it. I recently removed it and it was a good, if painful choice. So, already you can see what I mean about both ends. I hate one specific part of myself because it sexes me too much as a man, and another bit from the exact same area because it’s not manly enough. 

The hair on my head is also an issue. I used to have very long hair and really enjoyed it, then male pattern baldness ruined that. I often stare into a mirror and think how nothing screams “male” like male pattern baldness. I wouldn’t even mind having a shaved head if it didn’t have a widow's peak and a tonsure. For me shaved can be androgynous, MPB cannot. 

As for everything else it’s fine I guess, my hips don’t bother me and until they find a way to switch quickly and easily between genitalia (with both as an option), I’ll stick to working with what I got. I’d like a thicker ass, but that’s me being lazy with squats and a bit of unfortunate white boy’s ass genetics. What I’m saying here is that if I could sculpt my perfect body it would be impossible to determine its gender without other signifiers. 

So to combat this I am in the privileged position of being able to work with what I got without medical intervention. Good wardrobe choices, makeup, accessories and some nail polish usually suffice to keep the dysphoria demons at bay. I know that I will always be read as “man but queer” to most the world outside of inclusive spaces, and they will never see me as the effervescent truly androgynous fae creature I am, but fuck them I do it for me. This also means that in those times and situations where I am doing something that makes me feel manly I can shuck some of that, lean into it and enjoy it as such. Those times when I’m feeling very feminine, less so, but I go as far as I can. 

(And just an additional note on privilege. I am in a stable and happy relationship where I am a stay at home dad. I have a family that I’m not like “out” out to, but they’re used to me doing my own thing to the point that heels and makeup don’t even raise eyebrows. I have a very well curated group of friends, and my only real interactions with strangers are passing pleasantries at the school gates. This is all to say in terms of random transphobia the worst I get is on my social media platforms and I just delete and block.)

So enough about my body. Let’s go back to masculinity and femininity. Having grown up, reluctantly, within traditional masculinity, and frankly an unwelcome visitor to it at most points, there’s much about it that repulses me. There are however some things about it that I enjoy. I’m competitive when my footing is sure, there’s a certain playfulness that I happily engage in, a refusal to be solemn that keeps me balanced, I love bonfires, a good steak, I don’t drink much these days but the occasional beer is nice, I enjoy the fact that my strength is of value to people when work needs doing, I adore more than anything in the world being a “dad”. 

As for femininity again there is much that really puts me off. But I enjoy being able to be soft and yielding, since I expanded my wardrobe to include women's clothes I’ve found a joy in them, I love the transformational power of makeup, though the application is annoying, I enjoy my friendships, that I can support my partner outside of the lens of masculinity, that I can be more emotional than men are allowed to be, I love a glass of wine, a good salad, being pampered, and most of all I love the fact that I can love feminine things without having to question my own masculinity. 

My point with explaining all this is that for me transition, being trans is about choosing, in a very deliberate, careful, proactive and thoughtful way, who I want to become. Since my issues with my body are manageable without medical intervention a lot of my transition has been purely social and mental. It is entirely wrapped up in my drive for self improvement.

I don’t want to become either of the binaries, instead I want to create something new that is deeply personal to me. I want to take what I like of the binary and deliberately fuse it into an identity that removes the toxicity from both and allows for a better being to emerge from the husk that I was. Not masculine, not feminine, but an ocean that ebbs and wanes and is mostly its own thing. It’s a long, slow, painful process, and it involves not just gender but all other areas of identity. How can we strip the toxicity from gender without also stripping away the lenses through which it views others, and critically analysing its place (and our own) within structures of oppression that affect people at different intersections?

This is also something that comes up with a lot of non-binary people I talk to, the idea of how legitimate we are in claiming trans identity. If we look at the on paper diagram of gender we can see that non-binary sits under trans, and under non-binary there’s a very long list of sub categories. It often feels that the more niche or far removed your particular gender is from the umbrella the more uncomfortable people become saying they’re trans or claiming trans identity. Particular for people whose transition does not involve medical intervention.

I think, having spent three hours typing this out when I should be sleeping, this is the crux of my issue. So many of those articles describe transition as a process of making who you are outside match the inside, like identity is a fixed gem and the body is the rock you find it in, you sculpt and shave the rock to reveal the shape of the gem. And I am 100% certain that is the case for many, many trans people, I’m not doubting that we all have different experiences and internal worlds, and it is completely valid and beautiful, and I love to hear about them. 

But for me, I’m not uncovering who I really am, I’m building a better me. So to see such a jarring difference in fundamental approach just caused me to start asking questions. Am I trans enough to really write a trans story? Is the only trans story I’m really capable of writing my own? Is my story trans enough to be read as trans by other trans people? 

Thanks for reading, this was more of a vent than anything else, but if you wanna add some nuanced discussion of gender and transition I’d love to hear it.

Oh, and one final thing. Is it ok to say “the priest, a trans man…”? I never did find an answer.

P.S. Ok, so it’s morning now and a very helpful person on twitter last night pointed out that if you’re questioning your gender this much, you’re valid. That really resonated with me and honestly staying up to 3 AM writing a manifesto on your approach to your gender is probably peak trans behaviour.

In addition this morning I also saw on twitter two different threads, one reiterating the “I was always who I was narrative” but as a specific push back against the weaponisation of detransition narratives and shoddy reporting, and another pushing back against gatekeeping “what is trans?” and talking about how the medical model of transness can dominate discourse and invalidate people. I’m glad this is a conversation that is taking place in our community, and it feels good to have my experiences validated by the knowledge that others feel the same and have encountered the same issues. It is with that in mind that I’m sharing this publicly, this is not a rallying cry, or a call out, it is not my intention for my words to be weaponized against any trans person for any reason. This is a person, confused about their gender, just sharing their experience in the hope that somewhere, for someone, it does some good.

I guess my bottom line here is to say that whatever your approach to your own gender, if it’s one that subverts or violates the idea of a biological based binary, to me you are valid, you are authentic and your life matters.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Maybe I should just start putting random ass characters and symbols next to itoshis instead of doing strike through at this point…nothing can make me remember LMAO

Idk maybe it’s also like a personal preference kinda thing but I just love the way you write….I fully agree that I think partially it’s because the way you write romance feels sooo much deeper to me?? Like we’ve said before a while ago there’s so many different ways to show love that aren’t outright just idk kissing or whatever and I’m honestly all for it!!!! Like if you had written Sae just rizzing y/n up like “hey babygirl whatcha doing in Spain” I would run the other direction LMAO but the way you developed it felt sm more natural and enjoyable….I’m not even kidding like every now and then I’ll think back to the Sae fic (among everything else HAHA also bruh the only reason I bother to capitalize Saes name is because if I don’t it becomes saw smh) and I’ll be like damn….that was a good read….so trust I’ll read your fics even if it’s for igaguri LMFAOO

And true!! Bachira and Isagi are much more….naive ig?? For lack of a better term sure there’s a little bit of teasing here and there like how Bachira smacks Isagis head but it’s much more shallow and almost childish ig?? Like they just don’t really have the natural snark or sass that I’d imagine some other characters have (like tabieita and hiori LMAO) (maybe that’s the formula lowk….sassy teasing mfs……I love the sassy ones LMAO) Mira and Isagi arch nemeses guys!!! /j HAHAHA

The Mira dedication guys>>>> also I LIVE for your gojo honestly he’s also exactly as I imagined I love the bond between him and pi y/n too!! Lowk missing pi and all of the jjk gang that fic got me thinking more about jjk again….why did we never get another filler episode please I wanted to see them ALL happy together?? Second years and first years together with gojo nanami etc man….

I would LIVE FOR THAT SPREAD PLEASEEEE tabieita in a spread PRONTO!!!!! I know the artist usually like slapping out a little colored drawing every chapter and I’m manifesting a Karasu one so hard….i think last time it was chigiri??

Omg packing!!! Packing to me is such a hassle LMAO (feeling the Nagi vibes) also doesn’t help that I usually always end up forgetting something even if it’s really unimportant (as you can tell I forget a lot) but so worth it for vacation LOL

Omg I see the vision….zantetsu really just is the handsome Himbo of bllk HAHAHA

I’m ngl that toothbrush additional time I think is what sent people into the obsessive Reo agenda….along with the epinagi artist’s one extra drawing of like Reo mailing a straw doll of Isagi LMAOO??? I’m always conflicted when I see people running with that content using it as like hard evidence for Reo being insane when I really only took it as a funny/goofy little bonus work like?? I just thought it was kinda funny in a ridiculous way like before people really tried to “analyze” it I just laughed and moved on tbh….

Also wait louder for people in the back??? The way people forgive geto and even sukuna???? But like hate on nagi so hard I’m like??? And I guarantee some of those people directly overlap in the fandoms too like ok getostoelicker69 please do elaborate on why Nagi is the most toxic character in bllk……(also I AGREE?? Like I seriously don’t think Nagi did anything egregious especially because it helped them both grow…? And I can also understand Reo’s feelings like yeah no one would be happy having to separate just like that so it honestly just feels like teen drama idk why people are so pressed about it….)

You should’ve hit him with the “throughout Heaven and earth I alone am the chosen one” LMFAOOO I still can’t fathom what urges people to say things like that…did he say anything in response to that like hopefully he got the message…..crying no one compares to the bllk boys LMAO manifesting a normal dude interaction for you though because I’m actually never forgetting that wtf!!!

HEHE OK WILL SEND THEM IN SHORTLY!! Honestly I love brainstorming it actually gets my brain working HAHA and I’m so glad to hear that they’re at least somewhat useful LOLL will gladly send over all thoughts!! It honestly kinda gives me a way to explore characters too by thinking of scenarios and whatnot since I don’t really make any actual content with them otherwise!!

HAVE A SAFE FLIGHT!!! Actually maybe I should be waiting to say this later since I’m sure I’ll probably hear from you at some point between now and then but anyways! Omg there’s one time my downloaded songs just straight up stopped working and I just sat there like….ok then….idk how I got through it but I somehow did LOL and don’t forget to enjoy yourself LMAO I know you said writing helps you kinda wind down at the end of the day anyways but still! I’ll get those thoughts to you before your flight o7 ig speaking of any characters you wanna hear about? Off the top of my head I’m just plucking out Bachira and chigiri from our convo but I’ll gladly turn my brain on to think about others too HAHA

-Karasu anon

LMAOO no need to even censor them anymore we make our feelings loud and clear!! pls HAHA even if you don’t strike through their names i will still read it in the same tone every time

no because tbh seabird was sm fun to write it briefly changed my mind on sae…agreed though that man has negative rizz he’s lucky seabird reader matched his sass 😭 it would’ve felt so disingenuous to me if he was being like “zamn girl you are so fine 🫦” HDJSJS that’s so not him…unrelated but manifesting my own seabird sae moment on my trip 🙏🏻 where is MYYYY bird themed summer romance w a sarcastic athlete who’s secretly in love w me??? IGAGURI FIC INCOMING (after the ego fic ofc 😩🙏🏻 /j)

i LOVE a sarcastic teasing character LMAOO my type fr i think that’s another reason why i have trouble w isagi he’s just generally too nice of a guy (ignoring his on-field shenanigans) so it’s just boring 😰 like oh you’re sweet to your gf?? GET AWAY FROM ME!! hehe all jokes…no but don’t say he’s my enemy or else the next thing we know i’ll be in love w him too…miraeita is crazy enough we cannot get mirasagi

pi gojo is my man he’s truly the chaotic older brother figure everyone needs in their lives!! the pomegranate ink version of the jjk gang is so dear to me they just feel like a big family and they have so many silly interactions while also being there for one another through everything!! truly so special 🥹

packing is the worse and AGREED i feel like i always end up forgetting smth or another at home 😭 but oh well you can always just buy unimportant things at your destination!! so it’s not too big of a deal

HELP the additional times are supposed to be silly and exaggerated like yeah i was lowkey taken aback by the toothbrush scene but at the same time it was also just funny like obviously that’s not actually who he is as a character it’s him taken to the extreme for fun!! but yeah whenever someone despises nagi or some other random character but LOVES geto or smth i’m just like…interesting…look you can like who you like but how is a teenage soccer player a bigger opp to you than a genocidal cult leader??

LMAOOO i don’t even remember what he said after that i think he left me on delivered 😭 i too am praying to meet a normal guy at some point…perhaps one with dark hair in a stupid style w too much wax and a bird related name 🤔 just throwing out ideas!!

STOP OKAY BECAUSE YOUR BAROU AND CHIGIRI IDEAS HAD ME LAUGHING SO HARD THE HAIRCUT ONE?? THE SNOW SHOVELING ONE?? CRYING 😭 also the karasu one WOWWOWWOW imagine you see him play in the u20 game and you’re like holy shit so you ask yuki to set you up w one of the players and his mind goes to like reo (because he’s rich and canonically perfect) otoya (because he’s popular w girls) or nagi/rin/barou/isagi (because they all scored) but then you’re like no i want the crow boy 🤩 and then it’s a bunch of misadventures of yuki trying to set you up with karasu but karasu doesn’t believe you like HIM?? because canonically all of the valentines chocolates he received were just people messing with him (at least according to him) so he ALSO becomes your wingman because he really likes you but doesn’t believe he’s good enough 😩 but the whole time he doesn’t even know who you actually like so you end up going on the most awkward dates with random blue lockers (imagine just sitting across from barou in absolute SILENCE or getting rizzed up by otoya when you have 0 interest in him) which makes you think he doesn’t like you and he’s just trying to get you off of his back 😟 i think yukimiya would genuinely crash out because he’d know both sides of the story but would be too loyal to actually reveal anyone’s secrets

DRIVING TO THE AIRPORT NOW YAYY i’m lowkey motion sick asf from my dad’s driving which is why it took me a sec to respond + i’m having a crazy migraine for some reason so i’ve been napping in the car instead of going on my phone!! but also omg i love all of your ideas they were so good (if you couldn’t tell by me yapping abt karasu again i am unable to resist him 😩💔)

[suugrbunz]

I’d love to read the chapters you’ve published! Is it “Postcards From Paris”? I remember reading the snippets you posted last year, really enjoyed them, especially with the punk connection but also how the characters interacted, they were very human.

Aww, Laila.. That’s a really cool story. Lucky cat. She’ll appreciate you very much! She has a good home. My childhood cat was a tortoiseshell. They’re gorgeous.

My main account, which I reblog stuff from every now & then, is a bit of a mess, & I generally don’t interact with anyone from it as I like to keep as a safe, personal space for just me; but I’m thinking of creating a little sideblog to add moodboards of my characters? Maybe sometime.

It’s awful hearing you’ve been through so many horrible feelings regarding your body. We live in a very messed up world, wtf is wrong with people that makes them feel the need to cause others shame for something so natural? Don’t understand it..

Which Khalil Gibran book is it? I’d love to see the cover!

I think of you often too. This really is like writing an old pen pal! You made me smile. It’s so lovely to write to you again. As I said, I can’t be on here for long, due to lack of time and a general aversion to using the internet too much; but it’s so lovely to interact for a short while again!

Oh, and I want to say, you were so kind about my writing last year - you really motivated me and made me feel so very happy about it. I’m so private about my writing and only show it to a very few people.. So thank you for being so good to me about it, I really appreciated it 🩷

Also, “and i actually followed through on replacing nick” - you replaced him?! Lol! Made me giggle.

Okay, I’ll add some of my writing below.. ——————————

It’s late. They’d spent the night at Maureen’s favourite restaurant, the one with the concrete floor and the multicolour thank you notes on the walls, the one which Cecil also frequents to buy boxes of banana and melted chocolate sandwiches for Joey. Late and dark. The town’s already half-empty. They were lucky the restaurant still exists. Maureen, as always, unceremoniously shoves open her front door as she cackles about something funny a customer had done earlier while she’d been balancing filled boxes. Lyam follows her into the kitchen as she puffs repeatedly on her cigarette, talking around the smoke while he stays silent. She turns to him, one of her hands busy with the frying pan and the other with lighting her next cigarette. “You awrigh’ Benoit? Feels like ‘m talkin’ to myself,”

The words are rough and harsh - just like her voice - but her face is gentle and smiling. Lyam smiles softly back at her. “‘m awrigh’ Maureen,” Her smile turns toothy as she spins, scurrying over to the stepping stool to reach the pack of doughnuts, a cloud of smoke following behind. Lyam steps forward, hand on her buzzing arm, steady and gentle. She pauses, head lowering to look slightly down at him - an unusual angle for them. Trails of silky, white smoke run out of her painted lips, and they smile at him when she sees his glazed, gentle eyes looking right at them. “Keep tellin’ you Maureen, you gotta stop wi’ these,” he mutters, tugging the cigarette out from between her fingers. She’s still, watching him bend to stub it out on her counter ashtray in the bright, yellowy bulb light. She’s still, watching him straighten back up, his eyes on her face again, hesitant. She palaces a jittering hand on his cheek and his face relaxes. She doesn’t have to move forward much, they’re already so close, to connect their lips.

———————-

🫣 I’m so uncomfortable about showing others my romance writing, hope it’s okay!!That was their last moment together in the book. A good ending for them I thought!

Will read your chapters when I get the time :)

💝anon

Sadly, the punk connection had to be dropped because i couldn't get the plot to move forward. It was so strange and maybe it is partly my own fault because i was definitely worse at plotting atp. Whereas now plots come to me rather easily? Anyway, it is Postcards from Paris! I hope you enjoy it when you begin your reading journey. That is actually why i thought of you, i just wondered if you'd ever read my work and if you'd be proud of it.

I definitely recommend making moodboards; I have some planned that i haven't actually created yet. oh, i made webweaves for my characters as well! Those came out pretty nicely if i do say so myself. I am also really private about my writing and someone had to convince me to publish this (if they're reading this; hi, thank you, i hope you know who you are!!).

I DID REPLACE NICK IT FEELS LIKE SUCH A SIN. I miss him but the plot has moved forward so nicely since ive replaced him, but i really need to incorporate him in another way. I have an idea but we'll see 👀.

i love your writing so much, it's lovely as ever. every time i read your writing it inspires me to better my own. i hope you see the beauty in your writing. If it helps you at all, I've gotten into the habit of rolling my eyes at my own romance writing. Only recently, when writing zosa and amir's confessions, did i gush about my romance writing...and oh boy is it worth the gushing.

I love that you add dialect and accents into your dialogue; I have such a hard time doing that because i wonder if it'll be wince worthy if i do it... yet when i see others do it I'm just like starstruck by it.

[percontaion-points]

VOEN chapter 12

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions

Click here for the rest of the series!

Chapter 12

NÉSTOR TOOK A slow step back, his grip on the gun tightening. A feeling crawled over his skin, soft as the legs of roaches: something was watching them. Something was crouching low, ready to spring. 

He clicked the safety off. 

Nena was just behind him, so close he could feel her breath on his neck, low and quick as a hunted rabbit’s. His own pulse thrummed in his ears. Humming tightened the air. Twilight seemed to slip into full night between one heartbeat and the next; darkness fell around them in a cloying, intimate embrace. 

“Jesucristo!” 

He jumped, keeping his finger loose on the trigger. He lowered the gun immediately. That was Casimiro’s voice. His whistle had successfully summoned other vaqueros. 

The problem a lot of people had with this book was that as far as horror goes, especially for the supernatural, there’s a lot of huff and puff, but little to speak of when you really consider the entire thing.

And I was like “how bad could it possibly be?” 

But upon reading the build up at the end of chapter 11 and the resolution five paragraphs into chapter 12… I’m starting to get a sense for why people were frustrated with this book. 

Both Casimiro and Beto had answered his whistle and were next to the desiccated bull. Casimiro was crouched near the carcass’s throat, shaking his head in bewilderment as he examined it. 

“Beto,” Nena called. The vaquero looked up at his name, his eyes skipping from Nena over her shoulder to Néstor and back again. 

Beto knew. Beto always saw right through him. 

Their second day on the road, Beto had begun without ceremony. 

“So . . . this Magdalena. You have history,” he said.

THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE GOING TO FUCKING TALK ABOUT?!

Jesucristo, get some FUCKING PRIORITIES. 

Aguardiente blurred the edges of that night, but Néstor’s mind clung to one sharp corner of the memory: that night, Old Juan took a small bag of salt and poured it on the ground in a circle around his mare and the place where he would sleep, his head on his saddle as a pillow. 

A ring of salt. Perhaps, drunk though he was, his mind seized this detail because of how it echoed Abuela’s stories of witches and monsters. Perhaps it was simply too strange not to notice. 

I could be stone-cold sober and still WTF over the entire thing. If you don’t know that you’re in an episode of Supernatural, it’s such an odd thing to do. 

Beto’s eyes fluttered shut.

Chapter 12 summary: Instead of facing off against a monster, we’re instead let down when the others show up, responding to Nestor’s earlier call for them. Beto then looks Nestor dead in the eye and asks if Nestor and Nena don’t have history. That he once heard Nestor calling out for Nena in his sleep. I thought that this might have been later, the next morning, only with hazy and bad writing. But no. This is literally the same scene, with the characters not having moved at all. Beto straight up asked Nestor this while Nena was literally two feet away from Nestor. 

They look over to the dead bull and Nestor thinks about how he once found another dead cow on a drive in a similar situation. The others thought that it was a cougar, but nothing about the corpse made sense. 

This is interrupted by Nena basically telling Nestor to leave her the hell alone. The men encourage Nena to return to the camp, and Beto says that he’ll go to the river to get water for her instead. 

As they go, Nestor thinks about some guy that he sometimes went on drives with. That the guy was superstitious but also paranoid enough to the point where he’d sleep in a ring of salt. 

They get back to the camp, but there’s this scream from the river. Nestor goes running, and finds the monster fleeing from the prone figure of his friend. They carry Beto back to the camp, where they scream for Nena to come and help. She starts burning herbs and calling out for Beto to come back to them. 

[marukissnack]

*drops*

😈 🔥🔬🤖🥊

*and runs*

.....I wrote these last night, passed out, then PROMPTLY forgor to post them, I'm sorry Anon I have failed you orz

Find the list of questions here!

😈 Is Mikey a little shit?

Depends on your definition of little shit I guess.

Honestly I think he’s more tame than the canon Mikey’s. Unlike his counterparts who are more commonly seen with Hyperactive ADHD my Mikey is being written with Inattentive ADHD in mind. Because I’m more Inattentive and I wanted rep DON’T JUDGE ME 😫

He gets more little shit like after befriending April, though. Where he once had self restraint caused by the dreaded ADHD paralysis if nothing else, that all goes out the window once he has her enabling him and his absurd mental impulses that he used to do nothing about.

🔥 Is Leo accident prone? Especially in the kitchen?

Not really. If anything he does tend to rush into things, which can get him hurt, but that’s not really the same as being accident prone. You don’t really want him in charge of the kitchen, though. He does fairly well with cold foods like sandwiches or salad or like a charcuterie board or chopped fruit plate, but you don’t wanna risk him manning the stove. He’s better as a sous chef or assistant than the head cook.

🔬 Is Donnie only interested in Tech?

It is definitely his main thing, yes. But not his only interest. He also likes reading novels (Mystery & Thriller are his favourite), floor naps, and long, time consuming strategy board & card games (but only Yoshi is willing to play with him, cause he's the only one that can pay attention long enough to finish the game. They don't play often though, cause it's not as fun with only 2 people).

He's also a teen still, so he and his brothers do teen stuff (me, not a teen, who did not do teen stuff as a teen: wtf do teens do these days)

🤖 Does your Donnie have a robot child?

He does not :( He already has 3 younger brothers he has to watch over, he doesn’t have time for a 4th charge.

Although, having a robot assistant to help him handle them is an idea I had not previously considered...

🥊 Does Raph have anger issues? If so, how does Raph deal with his anger?

Oh goodness there is so much rage in that tiny body. He mainly takes it out on the junk in his & Mikey’s shared rage room, or through the games he plays. He is a rage gamer.

Raph doesn’t talk about it much, but when he does it’s usually to Mikey. It helps to rant about what’s making him angry. But he doesn’t like doing it too often; doesn’t want all their conversations just what’s frustrating him about the world and about himself. Sometimes Mikey has to coerce the rant out of him when he knows there's some bottling up happening.

Long story short, his methods of dealing with the anger are not on the healthy side for a while.

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

What if an AU where all the Nein are independently adopted by Vox Machina?

I'm! 90% sure I've seen a fic where Caleb gets taken in by the de Rolos, but just the image of this Scrounger trying desperately to redeem himself and Percy going 'wtf that's the most pathetic assassination attempt I've ever seen. You are my son now, if I can call a bear my son I can adopt you too. Want a whole castle's resources for your magic research?'

Beau gets taken by the Soul still but instead she ends up in the Westrunn branch because Thoreau didn't want her just escaping back home easily. And while there she runs into a visiting Grog who is like :DDD Finally a new monstah who can spar with me, come along now and help me learn to read pls

Jester still has to flee home due to her prank on Sharpe, but Scanlan was in town for a gig and fucking loved that trick so he's like 'hi come with me kiddo, NO I absolutely wasn't here to bone your mom I'm a married-divorced man how RUDE'

Pike is watching a circus performance in Wildemount with Grog or Scanlan, and she sees Molly and Yasha n thinks of her and Grog. Seeing two people in need of healing and growth, she offers to help Yasha with her memory and fallen Aasimar stuff and Molly gleefully tags along for the ride

Fjord's ship blows up, and while he's sinking at the brink of death the Snea Snek tries doing its thing, only for the Raven Queen’s Champion to go 'dick move leave the kid alone, he's mine now =/'

Keyleth visits the Blooming Grove on Ashari business and squints very sadly at Cad being alone, like she has felt, and offers her help in finding his family. And maybe try to find Vilya while she's at it...

Vex finds Nott stealing the fancy jewelry Percy made her and they riddle eachother with arrows til Dan pokes his head in and Nott fucking freezes and calls him Luc. Vex and Nott are instant wine mom friends to Percy's chagrin.

OMG I love that so much!!!!

I think I've read that Caleb and the de rolos fic too! And I think that Caleb having someone who understands some of what he went through would be so good for him and especially being around a family as wonderful as the de rolos. And them also helping to foster his magic in healthy ways and allowing him to teach their kids some of his magic.

I could also see Beau being taken in by Taryon? Because they live kinda close together and he calls VM and is like...hey I have this teenager and she's so mean to me please help. But then he realizes how fucking similar they are and offers her a place in his Brigade.

Jester and Scanlan should never be allowed within 1 mile of each other holy shit but honestly they might be good for each other and entertain each other and encourage each other's bad ideas.

And god you're so right about Pike and Yasha and Molly, they're both misfits just like her and Grog who only have each other. And it honestly warms her heart how much they care for each other so she decides to do anything they need to figure out who they are.

And Vax would absolutely look out for Fjord because he too has been unwanted and unloved and knows what it's like to think you have found you place in the world and then lose it in an instant. He can't be present for him really, but he can look after him to the best of his ability.

Keyleth starts checking in on the Caduceus a lot, whenever she has a spare moment because she knows what it's like to lose your family but still have to tend to your duties. He makes her very nice tea and always looks forward to their meetings.

And I love the idea of Veth and Vex having wine club together where they talk about all the shit their kids have done in the past few weeks because it's always a lot.

[haik-choo]

karasuno boys as boyfriends

a/n: im just basically astral projecting myself into these situations; ALSO if you want more detailed ones, just ask, and you shall receive! (also this is my first post i’ve written on here! but if you want plenty of kpop content i’m @hyucksong where i’ve been writing and I am still active! :))

---

[KARASUNO BOYS AS BOYFRIENDS HEADCANNONS]

-tsukishima, yamaguchi, hinata, kageyama, tanaka, nishinoya, sugawara, daichi, and asahi

---

tsukishima kei.

the type to look you straight in your eyes when you ask for a hug and say “no, who do you think i am, your boyfriend?”

runs his hands through your hair from the front and then when his hand reaches the back of your head he pulls you into him and kisses you either on the forehead or the lips <3

in order to be in a relationship with him you HAVE to have the same type of humor.

i don’t think he could date someone who doesn’t make fun of people with him

you guys are like best friends who make fun of each other and. make out a little every once in a while

he’ll hold your hand and hug you in public but he will NEVER do anything else, especially not in front of the boys

he thinks the blush that ignites on your kissable cheeks should be for his eyes only

he gave you a keychain that had a cute little strawberry shortcake on it. and it’s your most prized possession 

will shoot a glare at anyone who watches you too closely. like no. don’t get googly eyed over MY girlfriend. 

and you don’t have a problem with that ;) 

yamaguchi tadashi.

he likes to watch you when you’re not looking to pick out the little habits you do

he thinks that knowing someone’s little hardly noticeable habits is one of the most intimate things on mother earth

he knows that you stir the milk in the bowl three times before you pour the cereal in to check for chunks because you accidentally drank spoiled milk when you were younger

NEVER has an issue getting you a gift for any occasion. he ALWAYS knows what you’re looking at and what you want and you lowkey think he can read your mind but in reality he just pays attention <3

you’re either just as shy as him to bring out his more assertive side or more assertive than he is to bring out his more timid side -- both are good

kisses you on the forehead and holds your hand in public -- he loves PDA because he can show you off :’)

yes. he kisses the back of your nape in public. so what. 

YES. HE CLOSES HIS EYES WHEN HE DOES IT AND ACCIDENTALLY INHALES YOUR SCENT AND WHISPERS IN YOUR EAR THAT YOU SMELL GOOD. IDC IF YOU THINK THAT’S CREEPY. IT’S CUTE. YES. HE GIVES YOU THAT LOOK THAT SAYS HE’S CRAZILY IN LOVE WITH YOU. SO WHAT.

kageyama tobio.

he probably fell in love with you because you were just as passionate about something else as he is about volleyball; music, drawing, writing, math, science, reading -- whatever

i see this relationship as being one that’s like...accelerated friends. like,,, you act like him and hinata except you kiss sometimes and he can see you at the end of the wedding aisle

DEFINITELY reads cosmopolitans once you start dating because he wants to be a good boyfriend for you <3

PDA is literally little to NONe,,, not because he doesn’t like it...it’s just because he doesn’t realize that he’s not showing you affection lololol

like in one arm he has his athletic duffel bag and the other he has a volleyball

he doesn’t mean to neglect you he just does AGAGAG

realized he liked you when he thought about you when he was drinking his milk and mindlessly bought you one too

the first time y’all kissed. he literally stared at you so intensely for a SOLID ten minutes debating in his head whether or not he should just go for it or wait or just smash his face into yours and hope your lips connect

he chose to cross his fingers and ended up smashing his forehead and nose into yours 

it was cute tho <3

hinata shoyo.

YALL HAVE DATES WHERE YOU BABYSIT HIS SISTER. WTF SO CUTE

when yall cuddle and you’re the little spoon he likes to put his head on your shoulder/between your neck and watch as you scroll through tiktok or instagram and just mindlessly talk about his day 

the type of boyfriend where neither of you can cook and you both confusedly look at recipes on google like: ????? wtf is the difference between brown sugar and regular sugar

it’s his INSTINCT to hold your hand. no matter what. his hand just...gravitates to yous.

AND HIS LIPS JUST FIND YOUR CHEEK??? like it’s so natural to him to kiss your cheek when he sees you, even in public. it’s so adorable i--

THE TYPE OF GUY TO WIPE OFF FOOD FROM THE CORNER OF YOUR MOUTH AND STILL EAT IT AND SAY “you taste good!~” AND NOT EVEN REALIZE WHAT HE SAID. BUT WHEN YOU DO IT TO HIM HE BLOWS A FUSE

he loves to tickle you. like you’ll be vibing, drinking whatever you drink in the morning and he’ll come up to you all casually and kiss you cheek...and then he’ll pounce 

he holds you close to his chest when he tickles you, partally because he likes feeling your laugh vibrate on his chest, and partially because it’s easier to not get tickled if he’s right behind you

his sister LOVes you and it just. makes him so happy

tanaka ryuunosuke.

you CANNOT remove his hand from your ass. it is permanently glued there. it is attached to you. yes, even in public.

number 1 hypeman! he will always support you, no matter what! you could be in a competition to raise the biggest beetle and he’ll be there rooting you on and staying up late with you as you rear your award-winning beetle

you two lay next to each other on the couch/on his bed and he’ll have his arm around you and you’ll lay your head on his chest as you watch netflix shows

YOU, NISHINOYA, AND TANAKA? UNSTOPPABLE TRIO. POWER TRIPLET. 

i don’t imagine him being shy when he first kisses you; the first time he kissed you, you were literally just. existing and he literally just...couldn’t hold it in...and he just went for it

literally CATAPULTS himself into you and kisses you senseless

yes you and saeko are besties she gives you ALL the tea about young tanaka

the type to take off his shirt more during practice if you’re there watching, and literally BURN red if you mention anything about his muscles

you once traced a vein in his arm and commented on how hot it was and he literally short-circuited 

kiss his biceps. kiss his abs. kiss his cheek. please. it’s all he wants. he’s touch-starved

nishinoya yuu.

SUCH an excited boyfriend

like he seriously gets so hype doing ANYTHING with you pleaSE give this man an award. you’ll be at the amusement park and the line to get into a ride will be three hours and he’ll be like

“I get to spend three hours with you?!! fucking sick! absolutely radical!” 

he’s bold in public, but only because he wants to rub you in his teammates faces, but his ears will be Red

at home, he’s calmer :) he just loves to spend time with you, even if you’re sitting on a bench watching him practice receives for five hours straight in the blazing sun. 

he just treasures your time so much, you treats you like a precious gem -- he will NEVER treat you wrong. deadass has no problem admitting when he’s wrong -- but if he thinks he’s right then he WILL stand his ground

he’s a passionate man, who loves just as passionately.

his favorite time to kiss you is after you’ve taken a sip of a soda because he likes the taste of the syrup and the burn of the carbonation, but most of all because he likes the taste of your lips in combination with all of them

NIPS AT YOUR EAR. DEADASS JUST LOOKS AT YOU BRUSH A PIECE OF HAIR BACK WHEN YOU’RE DOING HOMEWORK AND IS LIKE “free real estate” AND C H O MPS

the day nishinoya told everyone yall were dating, kiyoko stopped you in the hallway and deadass got on her knees and thanked you LITERALLY she was like “i’ll buy you anything. give the word and it’ll be yours.” 

sugawara koushi.

would kiss you on the first date. deadass. he’ll just drop you off at your doorstep and you’re still high on adrenaline, and you’re lowkey hoping he’ll kiss you and you get  little disappointed when he doesn’t and then when you least expect it. bam. his lips on yours

his smell oh god, he literally smells like fresh sugar cookies. it’s like as soon as you get anywhere near him his smell just invades you nose and. you’re powerless. you just wanna hug him

never smells bad. try me, bitch. NEVER.

his hugs are literally god’s gifts. he loves hugging you. he just completely envelopes you with his pretty setter arms and his smell takes up all the space in your head and nothing else exists for that moment, just you two

loves tucking your hair behind your ears or just moving it out of your face; doing homework and your bangs are in the way? not for long because he’ll clip them up for you <3

he’s pretty mischievous and will playfully put his hand next to your head and lean down with such a HOT look in his eyes 

and he’ll say some shit like “i wanna devour you” and then he’ll laugh afterwards and give you a kiss on the forehead and you’re standing there. like -.- o.o -.- o.o

whenever he feels insecure about his position on the team, you’re always there to comfort him and he’ll just lay between your legs and rest his face on your stomach as you comb your fingers through his hair and scroll through tiktok

PDA? yes please. uh huh. mhmm. he doesn’t care who sees his love for you he just wants to love on you baby. kisses you on the lips, no problemo

daichi sawamura.

you and suga are the only ones who can scare him when yall are mad lol

boyfriend where you’ve dated for like a year but it feel like 50 have already passed. in a good way!

this relationship is so ungodly domestic. like from the first day it’s just pure comfort and he’s like your rock and you’re his anchor

you two bicker a lot but it’s lighthearted and you just feel so secure with him that poking fun at him and at yourself is just natural

daichi. gives. god. hugs. he does. it’s fact. 

his arms are just so big and he has so much body warmth and he probably smells like some bullshit cologne like “smoldering woods” and it’s just so. daichi

you two spend the night at each other’s house so often it’s like you already live with each other and people always forget that you don’t lolol

totally sleeps with his shirt off and only with underwear. isn’t awkward about it either;  when he wakes up he puts on sweats but still remains topless (not that you’re complaining)

you two are like. the strict parental couple, when you walk together whether it be down the street or in the hallways, you just look so right for each other it’s. mind blowing

doesn’t mind kissing you a little in public but really thinks that stuff should be for private; so normally he just kisses your temple and always has an arm either around your shoulder or around your waist

WHEN THE TEAM SEES YOU KISS ON THE LIPS THEY GO “EW” EVEN SUGA AND ASAHI AFIEFHEWIF

asahi azumane.

literal fucking teddy bear. god please cuddle him. please kith him. please comb through his hair with your fingers and kiss his nape and kiss the back of his head. please i beg of you.

did NOT ask you out first. he wrote love letter to you and then waiting behind the gym because he thought being near the volleyball gym would give him some luck and them you got in front of him and he was. deer in the headlights

needless to say you asked him out and kissed his cheek. he DIED

even once yall are comfortable in the relationship he still needs reassurance every once in a while because he’s a little insecure, not that you’ll leave him for someone else, but that he’s not good enough

his PDA skill are. subpar. he usually just holds your hand and that’s it, but sometimes kisses the corner of your eye or nose and you just combust

OH RIOGEH TOTALLY DOES BUTTERFLY AND BUNNY KISSES. YES GOD YESSSSS

when yall cuddle he doesn’t like spooning. he likes to be able to see your face and the expressions you make, so doesn’t like being the little or big spoon; yall face each other and just lets your head lay on his arm even tho it’s numb. im: soft

kisses are so sweet, slow, and hesitant. he doesn’t really kiss you often because he has terrible timing but...when he does it’s like the whole world just becomes still in that moment and nothing matters but his hands on your waist and yours in his hair 

[itsmyartfam]

Dadzawa fic rec list

So lately I’ve been reading a lot of Dadzawa fics so I thought I’d share them with you. I shortened down the summaries of some of the longer ones- I didn’t put them in my own words of course, but I just used the shortened snippets that authors sometimes put at the end of their own longer summaries. They’re in no particular order of greatness, and I tried to get a good blend of popular and less popular ones so here u go.

1) i. shaky hands- rexcorvidae

midoriya has chronic pain, and tries to hide it. aizawa deals with this, and learns something surprising along the way.

One-Shot. Honestly their whole whumptober collection is amazing I would totally read them all if you have the time, they’re pretty much all loaded with great Dadzawa content

2) Not all exits are made Equal- LunaLucrea

When a raid goes wrong, and Aizawa gets taken, he's hardly expecting to be found. He's a professional Underground Hero. He's seen situations like this play out before, and knows how the cards usually fall.

He's got people he'll miss of course, and he feels terrible about what this is going to do to Hizashi and Eri, but these are the types of risks he agreed to when he signed on the dotted line all those years ago. He's ready to accept his fate.

Too bad for him his former students are tenacious little shits.

Three chapters. I love seeing how Aizawa interacts with older Midoriya in the first chapter and how he thinks of all of his former students now that they’re pro heroes, he’s such a proud dad but he’s also so self-deprecating and he needs some love and class 1-A will force it on him. Wholesome, 10/10, but also warning for whump! on Aizawa’s part.

3) To the people we admire- The_ crownless_ queen

Eri learns about autographs, and how they're a way for fans to show they like their heroes. Naturally, she wants all of them — and especially Eraserhead's.

One-Shot. I don’t read many Eri fics but my god, this one is adorable. Eri learns about autographs and wants Aizawa’s but his students know that Aizawa doesn’t really give autographs so they devise a plan to get one out of him- basically by making him jealous of Eri getting autographs from every hero but him. It’s wholesome, Dadzawa is like ‘wtf Eri’, I love it.

4) Inhibitions- Thealmostrhetoricalquestion

Todoroki gets zapped by a Quirk that effectively lowers someone's inhibitions, and Aizawa deals with the strange, humorous, heart-breaking fallout.

The train ride back is something of a nightmare. Not because it goes badly, or because something awful happens, but because Aizawa can’t get rid of this feeling in his chest every time he sees Todoroki’s unusual, carefree smile. He looks like nothing has ever hurt him.

One-Shot. Lol, this one’s funny- Todoroki acts all loopy and carefree and Aizawa is frantically scrambling after him trying to make sure he doesn’t get himself into trouble, all while finding out more than he’d ever thought he’d learn about his student. Good shit, good comedy, good angst.

5) I consider myself lucky- alightintheshadows

For some of us, our teachers are the greatest role models we'll ever have.

One-Shot. Ugh, this is so sappy and kinda cheesy but I love it! Izuku gives his dads All Might and Aizawa gifts because he loves is grateful to them. WHOLESOME SHIT

6) Not in the Job Description- IidaRei98

A collection of drabbles revolving around the Dadazawa and Class 1A. Mostly fluff with some hurt/comfort - whatever pops into my head really!

Incomplete, 56/? Chapters. Solid collection of dadzawa drabbles. I didn’t finish reading them all because I get easily distracted away from long fics, but since it doesn’t follow a plot it’s easy to put down and pick back up when you wanna get your dadzawa fix.

7) passing through fire- achievingelysium

“What happened? A villain?”

“Ye- yeah,” Midoriya croaks. Shouta starts walking.

“I was there,” Shouta says, feeling through the words before he speaks, “but I don’t remember?”

Midoriya closes his eyes.

“No,” he agrees, “you wouldn’t. But- but you... were there. With... me.”

Aizawa finds himself in a street with little memory of how he got there. Then he discovers Midoriya, beaten and bruised, who claims Aizawa protected him—but as Aizawa regains pieces of his memory he realizes Midoriya may be lying, and he's the one who's done his own student harm.

One-Shot. OOH, OUCH, FUCKING LOVE THIS ONE! God I love the Dadzawa ANGST in this! I haven’t seen a dadzawa fic with a plot like this before, so I highly recommend checking this one out, especially if you like ANGST! Love it!

8) a penny for your thoughts- cassiopeia721

While visiting Eri at the hospital following her rescue from the Shie Hassaikai, Izuku and Aizawa-sensei both run into a nurse with a telepathy based quirk, and Izuku finds himself in a telepathic bond with his teacher. This is... somewhat worrying, considering how many secrets Izuku needs to keep.

Six chapters. Yet another Dadzawa fic with a unique concept that I have never come across before. Very good, much angst! My only complaint is I wish Izuku could’ve heard a bit more of Aizawa’s angsty thoughts, the whole thought-hearing did feel a bit one-sided at times, but overall it was a very good fic. The angst of Izuku struggling to keep his many secrets from Aizawa for a whole week was *chef’s kiss* Good dad-son bonding.

9) Geyser- spineless

Izuku faints during class when weeks of sleeping and eating poorly catch up with him. Aizawa, All Might, and his friends, remind him that no matter what he's going through, he doesn't have to do it alone.

Three Chapters. Good Dadzawa being all disapproving of his son Izuku pushing himself too hard and not taking care of himself like he can fucking talk lol. But also some angst cuz Izuku is a tormented boi who has been through too much and is Not OkayTM and his dads are there to help him.

10) The World on His Shoulders- baggytshirtsandtiredeyes

During their second year, Aizawa decides to take some of the students on patrol to give them a taste of the underground hero life. But of course, nothing goes as planned when UA's resident Problem Child is involved.

One-Shot. Izuku is a BAMF and Aizawa is like O.O. I can’t say anything more. This fic deserves more attention.

____________________________________________________

Okie dokie, that’s enough for now. If you guys like my recommendations, maybe I’ll make another list in the future! 

[misora-msby]

embarrassing moments with inarizaki

inarizaki always looks so cool but you know they’re actually dorks and i am here to provide you the content to show theyre clowns. enjoy the headcanons :)

Kita Shinsuke

firstly. kita shinsuke being embarrased? making a mistake? unheard of.

he’s a perfect man and we all know it.

anyways

you two were having a nice dinner out together. 

it was a pretty fancy place so you decided to dress in a different style today

but you were beginning to wonder if kita liked it or not because he seemed to keep looking past your shoulder instead of at you

he was an observant guy so you were wondering if something had happened behind you

but you couldn’t hear anything weird so you assumed not

you decided to just stay quiet about it at first but now it was beginning to become annoying! 

why wasn’t he looking you in the eye to speak?

midway through your dinner, kita finally spoke up tho

“y/n, your shirt is slipping... yer bra’s showing.”

oh.

right. you were wearing your off-shoulder top.

“o-oh. shin, it’s that kind of shirt, you know?” you had to explain your outfit to ur bf with a pink face.

“oh... that so... well it’s cold these days so if yer feelin’ cold lemme know. i’ll give ya my jacket.”

GOD HES SO PERFECT KITA SHINSUKE I HOPE U MARRY HIM???????

Ojiro Aran

another man with next to no flaws.

but nature says everyone has to make some mistake.

so it was a regular school day, our aran has just come to class from morning practice and there’s still some time left until class starts.

all the girls in class are gathered around a table

he’s not sure why, it’s probably watching an idol video

but ur man wants to be a little romantic!!

plus he just showered so he smells Great uwu

he goes over and hugs you from behind, placing his chin on ur head.

“hey, bb whatcha ya doin”

all the girls gasp.

he doesn’t get whats wrong, it’s not like it’s a secret y’all are dating

pda to this level aint bad either

especially compared to his teammate miya atsumu

“ojiro aran.”

why is your voice behind him

he looks down and nearly faints when he sees he hugged the wrong girl.

to be fair she looked a lot like you from behind, just maybe 1cm shorter.

“i’m so sorry!” he keeps apologising to literally everyone and all the class is giggling bc they never seen their school’s ace so red before.

“didn’t think i’d come back from the toilet and see my bf cheatin”

“IT WAS A MISTAKE! I’M SERIOUS! Y/N U KNOW I LOVE YA!” 

hes so funny i swear

the volleyball team hears of it and it gets even better 

Miya Atsumu

it’s not a secret that miya atsumu, setter of the inarizaki volleyball team and invited to national youth training camp, had a gf

he was very much in love with u 

the whole class knew it because he’d show it off whenever he could too

so here comes valentines day

last year he received like... 50 different gifts from girls and guys aiming to win his love.

you didnt even give him one lmAOOOOO 

but this year, he had been not so subtly trying to hint that “i better not receive any chocolates this year when i’ve got a gf!”

he reaches school and plops into his seat.

there’s an anonymous box of chocolates with “please accept my love, miya-kun! <3″ on it

“the hell’s this?!”

“oh? chocolates?” - osamu who just popped his head into the class to shove into his twin’s face how much chocolate he got.

especially since the blond was off limits, the grey-haired twin had a bigger following now.

“do they not know i have a girlfriend...”

“well, ya might as well eat it. ya dont know who to return it to.”

“that’s like receivin’ their love!”

“no it ain’t. it’s just food.”

atsumu couldn’t argue with that and popped a piece in.

it was very delicious. the chocolate practically melted on his tongue and was the perfect sweetness and was filled with a delicious ganache too.

it was perfect

but he couldn’t accept this!

“it ain’t even good. too sweet and the filling’s sticky.”

“ah. really? is that what you think, tsumu?” you ask from the door where you had been watching the exchange take place.

“y/n! look at this! some weirdo gave me some choco and like... samu said to test it but i’ll toss it out, promise.”

“tsumu, i made that... i wrote it anonymously because i thought you’d know it was me and i wanted to tease you a little.”

“huh.”

osamu: “yeah actually i went over to her place to teach her how to make it.”

atsumu: “you said you went to suna’s place?!”

osamu: “i went there later but i first went to help her.”

you: “anyways if it’s not good i don’t mind if you toss it out...”

tsumu: “NO NO BABE I PROMISE IT’S GOOD”

you: “you just said-”

“BABE I SWEAR IT’S GOOD I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO ACCEPT A STRANGER’S STUFF”

“you’re always so honest though... are you sure?” you were having your fun teasing him now.

“BB PLSSSSSS”

he still cringes at the memory 4 years into ur marriage

Miya Osamu

osamu would DEFINITELY make home made dinner dates a regular thing.

this alone shows he’s the better twin - miya atsumu stan

he loves cooking and eating with you so sometimes when he’s got a day off you guys’ll set aside the afternoon to make a real nice dinner

imagine candlelit dinner with miya dorito body osamu in a suit

of course some fun stuff happens after too ;)))

and today’s your third anniversary!!

so osamu adds lots of ‘natural aphrodisiacs’ to the meal

i’m talkin

garlic bread and soup for an appetiser, a nice juicy steak with garlic and red wine sauce for the main, and chocolate coated strawberries for dessert

mm yummy

you two cleaned your plates completely (it was very delicious) and as you were washing the dishes, osamu comes up behind and wraps his arms around your waist

“yes, ‘samu?” 

“i’ve already prepared us a nice bath with yer favourite scents.” he’s got his head resting on ur chin

“really? thank you~ i’ll be there in a bit”

but he doesn’t let go of you while you’re still scrubbing at the baking sheets.

“osamu, you can let go for now.”

“don’t feel like it.”

“i gotta wash the dishes since you did most of the cooking.”

“mmm, i’ll do it if ya gimme a kiss.”

you roll ur eyes bc what a cutie 

u turn ur head to give him a kiss but suddenly he 

he burps

that garlicy wine smell is just kinda there

“ew! ‘samu!!”

his face is real red but he’s also trying not to laugh because he’s still a dude and this is absolutely hilarious to him

“want another?” he starts teasing

“i’m not getting in the bath with you.”

“wait wait wait i’m sorry, i’ll go brush my teeth and give you a proper kiss”

Suna Rintarou

you two were taking the train home today

it was quite late due to practice going a little longer than usual, so he insisted he walked you back home today.

sunarin can be a good boyf sometimes ok

it was getting a little crowded on the train tho, since people were heading home or going out for dinner

luckily you had already grabbed seats so you were quite comfortable sitting side by side. 

you and suna have the type of relationship were you dont have to talk all the time

silence is v comfy.

he’s just scrolling through twitter on his phone while you’re looking around the car, lost in ur thoughts

suddenly you notice an old lady standing a little bit away from you and you stand up

“baa-san, please take my seat.” you whisper in the crowded carriage

“oh how kind of you. thank you, dearie.” she smiles and takes your seat while you stand in front of her and suna instead.

suna doesn’t realise this exchange has happened tho

(he’s on his phone as usual)

probably starting some fights on twitter

he decides to try to be a little romantic and pretends to stretch his arm around (who he thought was) you.

“rin.” 

why is your voice right in front of him?

“young man, i appreciate it but i’m married.”

suna jumps as he sees someone he did not recognise next to him.

he looks up and notices you had moved.

you’re giggling

the granny’s giggling

atsumu and osamu sitting opposite on the carriage look like they’re going to cry because they’re trying not to laugh

“i was just stretching. really.” he mumbles and crosses his arms, face red as a tomato

he’s so embarrassed.

Ginjima Hitoshi

sometimes the inarizaki vbc would go for an after practice snack at the nearby family mart

they were really hungry after an intense preparation for nationals which was in two weeks so kita insisted they all get something to fill them up on the way home

but lucky lucky ginjima hhehe

you (his classmate who he had a crush on) were working at the cash register today.

“welcome!” you greet everyone as they enter

he cant help but stiffen up a bit 

why are u so cute and cheery today

the 2nd years already know what to do.

“heyy, i think last week i bought ya that ramen right? ya owe me my konbini snacks today!” - atsumu

“yeah. you lost a bet to me last week so u gotta pay up. a pack of jelly fruit sticks please.” - suna

“forgot my money today, mind payin’ for my snacks too?” - osamu

“like hell i’m paying for all of you. especially you, osamu. you eat too much all the time.” 

aran’s noticed what’s going on,

“hey, if it’s just for today you can do it right? if ‘samu don’t pay ya back tomorrow i’ll nag him ‘til he does.” 

“fine...” his basket is full when he goes to the counter.

he’s trying his best not to have a red face while watching u scan the items, ur hair swaying slightly as u look back and forth between the objects and the screen.

“alright. 4,890 yen please!” GOD he hated how expensive it was, that’s almost all his weekly allowance but bc it’s u and ur voice saying it it’s kinda ok

“mm, ok.” he still has his eyes on you while he takes out his wallet and puts it on the counter.

yes

his wallet, not the money

“...” “...”

“excuse me, sir. this is...”

he almost slaps his face wtf he’s so embarrassed.

“s-sorry. just a little absent minded after practice.” he starts pulling out his cash.

“it’s fine! i know how hard you guys practice!” you smile while performing the rest of the transaction and pass him his big bag of goods. “good luck for nationals, ginjima-kun!”

he almost runs out of the store and is about to fight the rest of the 2nd years for watching and (suna) recording

[greensaplinggrace]

So you mentioned in another post that you have some strong thoughts on Baghra, especially about how the story frames her as one of the good guys. I would love to hear about it.

@youremotionallystablefriend: I would love to hear you rant about Baghra if you feel like it (and haven’t already)! Personally I don’t think she gets enough constructive critique in the fandom for being the one that brought Aleks up and for the way she treated her pupils and especially Alina :/

Anon: Hello! I love your thoughts on the grisha books. I'm actually interested to hear your take on Baghra

@misku-nimfa: If you are up for it, I would love to read your thoughts on Baghra or your full critique of society in the Grishaverse. Your analysis is really well structured and interesting! ^.^

Anon: Hi! I saw your recent post and was wondering if you'd share more of your thoughts on Baghra?

---

Hello everyone! I was honestly very surprised to see so many people interested in my thoughts on Baghra? I'll share what I can, but please know that this is by no means a full breakdown of her character! It’s just some Thoughts I’ve had, and they’re mostly centered around show Baghra because that’s how I was first introduced to her character. Although IMO book Baghra might actually be even worse.

I’d like to preface this by saying that many of my issues with the treatment of Baghra as a character in fandom come from the wild double standard there seems to be regarding her and the Darkling. Darkling Antis and a vast majority of the people in this fandom who don’t like his character have a disturbing habit of absolutely ripping into the Darkling for all of his faults and then turning around and treating Baghra as some sort of pristine mother figure for the exact same shit.

They’ll talk about how badass she is, how strong she is, how they sympathize with her past (although they’ll continue to dehumanize the Darkling and refuse to sympathize with his own past) and sympathize with the fact that she has to deal with the Darkling (who’s always referred to as a monster she must corral or control, as if he is inhumane and beastly. These particular comments always take on the very distinct tone of victim blaming as well). They’ll laud her for all of these “powerful girlboss” moments as if they aren’t carbon copies of the Darkling’s own behavior - as if they aren’t things Baghra herself taught him. Which is why this is the wildest double standard of all to me, because every horrible action they praise Baghra for is something she taught the Darkling, and something they cannot stand to see in him as well.

It’s as if there’s a disconnect between their consumption of the literature when it comes to the two characters, and I’m of the opinion that it’s largely because Baghra is a woman and a mother and therefore infantilized in the fandom quite a bit. In fact, Bardugo herself often infantilizes many of her female characters in her writing. This is mostly through the process of excusing their terrible deeds, not allowing them to do anything remotely dark, or brushing any morally grey actions under the rug without ever touching upon them. Which puts me in the strange position of knowing I’m supposed to sympathize with Baghra for having to deal with the monster she’s created, and instead feeling resentful of the fact that this bitter woman is held up as this wise old strict teacher instead of the abusive mentor/mother she should have been.

Now, here’s what I said to make so many of you send me asks:

Last note, in reference to your first line, and also probably a pretty unpopular opinion. I do not like Baghra. And it legit has nothing to do with the Darkling or with Alina, I just don't like her "I'm going to hit you and berate you and emotionally abuse you and manipulate you and act like the good guy at the end of it" vibe she's got going on. At least Aleksander is acknowledged as the villain within the narrative. Idk wtf Baghra is on but it's absolutely wild to me that people aren't more critical of her actions. Which is, rather fortunately for you, another rant I will save for another post if anybody ever wants to hear it lol. (but like kudos to Baghra's actress. I loved the character as a character, I just don't like the way she's framed as a good guy. Weird. Uncomfortable. She literally set bees on the kids she was teaching).

This basically summarizes most of my thoughts on Baghra as a character and how she’s portrayed. I touched on it a bit above, but the way she’s able to get away with so much and not suffer under heavier critique is honestly baffling to me. There should be a lot more criticism of her out there in the fandom. This is the woman who abused her students and neglected her son. Although to be honest I don’t even know how to quite describe the emotionally neglectful yet unhealthily codependent bond she fostered in him from a young age. IMO, Baghra’s behavior around Aleksander is creepy, and I know she has a history that makes it more understandable, but it’s still incredibly disconcerting to witness.

But let’s get back on track! First of all, her students. Whom she physically, emotionally, and mentally abuses. She’s derisive, she’s insulting, she’s belittling. She works hard to strip them of any self confidence they may have. She uses pain as a means of triggering powers. And the strict teacher excuse doesn’t fly. The “it’s only a training method!” excuse is even worse. This is literal abuse she’s heaping on her students and it’s wretched.

The first thing she does to Alina when they first meet is insult her. Then she hits her. Then she kicks her out.

Second time they interact is a montage. Baghra hits Alina multiple times. She shames her. And then when Alina actually calls a light she tells her it’s not nearly enough, effectively wiping the smile off of her face and every sign of self confidence that had been building. Then we see the door to Baghra’s hut shut in Alina’s face. So now she has been bruised, battered, berated, stripped of all self confidence, and then banished again. As training methods go, this is not only entirely ineffective, but it’s also just abusive.

Then we get this interaction between Alina and her friends:

Marie: One time, Baghra released a hive of bees on me. Nadia: Worst part is, it worked. Marie: It really did. I could summon at will after that.

Which is fucking horrifying and not talked about nearly enough. That goes beyond hitting your students. Baghra used a fear tactic on a young girl to activate her powers. She literally tortured Marie to make her powers work.

Alina throughout this conversation is looking very disheartened. She’s lacking in any self confidence and the comment about the bees has clearly affected her. For someone who’s first words to Alina were “Everyone believes that you are the one. Come back when you believe it too,”  Baghra doesn’t exactly seem keen on Alina actually believing she’s the one. If she did, she wouldn’t be stripping her of every positive emotion associated with sun summoning.

Let’s not forget that Baghra demeans Alina multiple times for her status as an orphan. How she utilizes what she knows of Alina’s emotional weaknesses to provoke her and discourage her and make her angry.

And then Baghra drugs her without consent. To take advantage of any information Alina gives her in that state. To use the way Alina reacts for her own ends.

Because why else would she say this?:

Alina: We planned to run away together. Baghra: You had plans. Perhaps he never did, because where is he now?

Which is, strangely enough, the same sense of isolation and separation from Mal and her past that Aleksander is attempting to foster. Weird how mother and son are both using the same manipulation tactics.

In fact, why does Baghra never tell Alina about the letters until she’s already engaged with Aleksander? Baghra must have known he was taking them. Alina talks about it enough. Baghra must have known he was isolating her from Mal. How could she not, when it’s revealed later that she has spies in the Little Palace collecting information on him? How could she not, when she knows he’s the villain from the beginning - when she knows he’s manipulating Alina?

Baghra knows, and yet she keeps the same lies Aleksander does and furthermore uses that information to make Alina feel even more isolated and weak. Baghra literally just piggy-backs on Aleksander’s manipulation and then exacerbates it. She wants Alina to feel no attachments to her past because she wants to use Alina as well. But for some reason, because this manipulation and treatment of Alina as some sort of tool is done by the woman who opposes the Darkling, it’s suddenly okay. As if it still isn’t the same terrible shit but with a different perpetrator. I mean damn, at least Aleksander feels something for Alina. Baghra’s just cold.

So, point by point. Baghra mentions how Mal doesn’t care for Alina, she mentions Alina’s failings constantly, she mentions Alina being an orphan, she constantly hits her, she guilts Alina about orphans dying, she works to instill a sense of isolation from her friends and her family.

And when Alina finally comes to Baghra, having decided to abandon her attachments to her past and her attachments to Mal, the words that ring in her head are Baghra's words - “needing anyone else is weak.”  Which is honestly just a horrible sentiment in general, but an even worse one when considering how hard these people are working to detach Alina from anybody who can help her or give her an outside perspective.

Strangely, it’s also similar to this line:

The problem with wanting, is that it makes us weak.

...which is spoken by Baghra’s son. You know, the Darkling? Our big bad villain? The one Baghra raised?

Which gives me the impression that Baghra’s teaching methods with her students are really not that far off from the teaching methods she used on him as he was growing up. It’s a horrifying thought, and leads into my problems with her relationship with Aleksander.

First of all, show wise. What the fuck.

Aleksander: They’re punishing us for being Grisha. Baghra: Punishing you. You made him afraid. Now he wants you to fear him. Aleksander: I won a war for him. Baghra: And in doing so, started a war on us.

I get that she’s trying to convey how the king feels here, but it still feels incredibly victim blamey from a narrative standpoint. It isn’t Aleksander’s fault the king fears him when he used his powers under the King’s banner to help him win a war. Aleksander trusted this man who betrayed him and then betrayed his people, and we get a line from his mother, entirely unsympathetic, talking about how it’s his fault all of these people are dying.

Baghra: Where’s the girl, your healer? Aleksander: Dead. She died because of me. Baghra: She died because they always do. They’re not as strong as you and me.

Baghra’s use of the term ‘girl’ and ‘healer' here instead of Luda is pretty telling. She either doesn’t like Luda or doesn’t care for her. Either way, this is the woman her son loves, and Baghra talks about her so dispassionately. Then he comments on Luda’s death and there’s no reaction except to say that they always do.

Like, her son is literally broken up over here. Grieving. Desperate. Run ragged. Caged and hunted. Feeling guilty as hell. Mind running through a million different ways he could possibly save all of these people. And Baghra offers him nothing except a paltry “people die, get over it, we’re better than that, she didn’t matter anyway.”

Honestly, how is Aleksander even still functioning at this point? He has no support system and he’s working against a king and his army to protect a group of civilians he could easily abandon to save himself. The sheer amount of responsibility and mental strain keeping track of a group alone entails is already monstrous, but adding in every other factor? The recent death of Luda, the fact that they’re cornered and they’ve been hunted down while fleeing across the land, the fact that he was just a couple hours ago forced to his knees and entirely at these men’s mercy, begging for Luda’s life. And here his mother is, if anything a negative support system. Offering no other ideas, telling him to give up hope, not even offering the barest smidgeon of emotional support as he grieves, putting everything on his shoulders.

It pisses me the fuck off.

Aleksander: You’re the one who taught me how to kill, mother. Their blood is on your hands as much as mine.  Baghra: I taught you so you could protect yourself. Not them.

Once more, Baghra highlights how he needs to protect himself. How he should abandon the people he’s protecting. How he shouldn't help others and only ever himself. Once more, she says it’s my way or the high way. There’s zero effort to work with him. Zero effort to sympathize or compromise. She’s constantly pushing him to take the one option she knows he won’t take. The hell did she think was going to happen?

Also, Baghra taught him how to kill. Not necessarily great parenting, but understandable given the circumstances of his upbringing. But the level to which she takes it is honestly concerning. Like, look no further than this woman to see where Aleksander got it from lol.

Baghra also forbids him from using Merzost. Which is great and all, she gets to claim the moral high ground. But she doesn’t offer a single alternative except to flee and let everybody die. There was legitimately no other option to Merzost except for torture and death. If there was, Baghra sure as hell didn’t help Aleksander come up with one. Aleksander, who - by the way - is in no fit emotional state to be making any kind of decision right now.

So anyways, that’s just my tv show grief regarding Baghra, and it’s not even really all of it. I don’t want to make this an hour long read though lmao. But I’ll go over a few other things.

First of all, Baghra’s whole “We’re the only two that matter. We have to do whatever we can to protect ourselves,” mentality is one that she actively touts to Aleksander on a regular basis when he’s incredibly young. It’s honestly a wonder he grows up to care about other people at all. But the mentality itself is something Aleksander still heavily internalized in regards to protecting himself and those he deems worthy at any cost.

There’s a moment in the books when Aleksander is attacked and nearly drowned by some kids who wanted his bones (one of which was a close friend of his). He uses the cut in self defense and then blames the nearby Otkazat’sya village. Baghra knows he’s lying, and yet she allows an entire village to get slaughtered for harming him. This is a disproportionately violent act that Baghra approves of, and Aleksander as a kid is definitely internalizing that mindset.

Also, Baghra’s behavior around Aleksander has always been weirdly possessive and controlling. Especially when it comes to the people he loves. Her actions often come across as her trying to isolate him in order to keep him by her side, even when the relationships he has are clearly intimate. Which... is especially strange for a mother to be doing to her son.

She was also an extremely emotionally neglectful mother. Based on the show and what I gathered from her actions there, I’m actually half convinced she was physically abusive as well, in that “I think I’m being a stern, good parent figure when in reality I’m actually harming my child” kind of way. She fosters codependence with her son and then refuses to provide for any of his emotional needs. She drives it into his head that everybody dies, that he’ll always be alone, that love is useless and power is everything. She denies him the opportunity to be soft and works to harden him at a young age. She tells him he must never allow people to touch him, except she doesn’t work to supplement those physical needs in any way. She essentially abuses him.

Honestly, I could go on. But in reality the simple fact is that I just don’t like her. I think she’s a hypocrite. I think she’s abusive. I think she’s a terrible mentor and an even worse mother. And I think the fandom and the books are willing to brush aside so many of her faults simply because she opposes the Darkling.

I’m sorry if this isn’t what you guys were looking for! It sounds like a lot of you wanted a more of a sophisticated breakdown, but my thoughts on Baghra come with a heap of emotional baggage lol. It feels weird to say this now, but I actually do like the character as a character, I just,,, don’t like her in every other aspect. My feelings on Baghra are just a bit personal, to be honest. But hopefully this was at least comprehensible??

[shotorozu]

Heya! I love your writing. Could I request scenarios for Bakugou, Kirishima, Todoroki, Midoriya and Denki (if that’s ok, and if not, just cut Denks 😔) with a S/O that snorts when they laugh and their a little insecure about it, so they usually cover their mouth as soon as it happens or just try not to laugh at anything and as a result they put up this serious front when, in reality, they are really just ✨a crackhead✨

s/o that doesn’t like their laugh

character(s) : bakugou katsuki, kirishima eijirou, midoriya izuku, todoroki shouto, kaminari denki

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns, quirk not specific

headcanon type : fluff, crack-ish (if you squint, there’s a dash hurt and comfort)

note(s) : PLS i can relate to this, my laugh is a cross hybrid of a window being cleaned, and a hyena 🗿 i normally don’t write 5 characters in one post but.. exceptions will be made. sorry that this took so long! will go back to writing requests

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bakugou katsuki

he was very confused, and shocked?? it was a lot

you and him are very similar, like,, out of all the people in 1-A, he’s never seen you laugh like.. hysterically.

it was always normal for him to surpress his laughter when the times are right. but even when you guys got together, he never saw you laugh

which was just a “hm.. okay? wtf, i haven’t seen them laugh before??” moment

and don’t get me wrong, it’s not like you’re emotionless, and he HASN’T seen you laugh, it’s more like you just cut yourself off before it gets too intense

which is.. 🤨 weird. to him at least

laugh if you need to laugh, he doesn’t get why you always cut yourself off, like smh the audacity

okay so imagine this, you’re sitting in the kitchen— only a few feet away from katsuki, as he finishes cooking for you, just like any normal day

but i also headcanon that bakugou likes to taste test his cooking, before he can serve it to you. y’know— just in case he accidentally used bad ingredients which is rare, since he’s very precise with cooking

so he prepares the plate and utensils, and before he serves it to you— he takes a quick taste to see how it is, but his face immediately twists in disatisfaction

“what the fuck—” he sputters, looking at the plate “who the fuck switched the salt and sugar?”

and that seemed to be your breaking point, you immediately burst out into a fit of giggles and snorts, even with katsuki still recovering from the weird after taste.

if it was any other person, he would’ve chucked them out of the kitchen— but seeing you laugh out loud like this left him appalled

but your laughing episode is cut short when you realize that katsuki’s just staring. not saying anything, nor is he telling you off for laughing.

his expression looks so indifferent from seeing you laugh?? so you simply just apologize “sorry, i know the laugh is ugly.”

katsuki quickly snaps out of it, ruby irises glaring at you “ugly? when the hell did i say that?” he questions, voice gruff

your silence makes him think that you’re actually insecure about your laugh, an despite the weird aftertaste in his mouth, he decides to speak

“look, it was nice seeing you laugh, idiot.” he adds, because it sounded a little too nice “i don’t get why you have to hold your laughter back, especially around me. laugh if you need to, i’m not gonna judge you.”

plus, he’s not the person to judge you for your laugh anyway, his laugh.. is questionable for sure. i wouldn’t say it’s any better, so that would’ve be hypocritical of him

“you sure?”

“hell yeah i’m fuckin’ sure! but anyway, i’m gonna kill the bitch that switched the salt and sugar!” he gets up from the table, plate in hand as he goes to fix the meal

he surely can’t see your face right now, but when he hears you laugh, he can’t find himself not being able to smile.

he can only look forward to seeing you laugh again.

kirishima eijirou

his first reaction was :00 and 😳

so he was kind of left to his own thoughts when he realized that,, he hasn’t seen you laugh wildly before

and it’s not like you were just 😐 the entire time, you just always covered your mouth whenever you wanted to laugh

it was a big mystery to him, but he doesn’t think it’s quite manly to ask you that, it wasn’t long before he found out anyway

so! i headcanon that kirishima has his lil gaming night with the bakusquad maybe once or twice a week, they usually choose to communicate through the voice chat so.. no physical interaction.

and you’re just there, spectating the entire thing. because you still wanted to spend time with eijirou— but you didn’t want to interrupt his weekly gaming moment

so there’s a twist— he was actually playing a rpg multi-player horror game with the bakusquad, so.. jumpscares, am i right?

you were just sitting there on his bed, just watching if there’s anything interesting so far— and surprise! there’s a jumpscare.

eijirou jumps a little from the impact, and you can just hear the faint girlish screams of bakugou and kaminari, even from this length— basically telling all of them to just fucking dip! run the other way!

AND YOU WEREN’T EXPECTING BAKUGOU TO SCREAM SO.. HIGH PITCHED?

so you just start laughing when you hear the continuous screams, from his headset rip kiri’s ear drums and while kirishima tried to focus on the objective, he couldn’t help but turn around

just to see you laughing your ass off. and he’s there like 😳 they’re laughing?? they’re laughing!

so kirishima quickly finishes the game, but he just found himself in a state of shock. but then you covered your mouth so :(( aw.

you notice that he finished his game, so you just stop laughing entirely “oh— are you finished, eijirou?”

he’s still kind of taken aback by the laugh, and you seem to have noticed his reaction “wait, did you.. hear that?”

when you see eijirou nod, your expression seemed shell shock— which confused him, until you told him that you assumed that he didn’t hear you because of the headphones

“what? is it bad?” he asks with genuine curiousity, but you just explain that you’re just embarrassed. because the laugh itself is ugly

which kirishima disagrees!! >:(( your laugh had him in awe. he loves seeing you laugh, and it was a nice surprise.

“i love hearing you laugh! it makes me happy— i don’t see any reason that you should be ashamed of it, everyone’s laugh is different, after all.”

you’d say he’s lying, but the genuine toothy grin on kirishima face convinces you that he has the purest intentions.

midoriya izuku

now that i’ve thought about it, have we ever seen this boy burst into laughter?? this excludes the hospital scene of course.

but he’s not too concerned about himself not being able to freely laugh, but it was more like he was curious (or concerned) about you

you’re always quick to either cut yourself off, or you just cover your mouth entirely. and he can’t help but feel curious!

he asked you at some point on why you do those things when you laugh, but you just shrugged. so until that point, it was just simply a mystery— that’s left to his own imagination

so whenever midoriya creates new moves with his quirk, he’d have the sudden desire to show his s/o and ask if the move would be practical in anything. because why not

and we all know how much midoriya trains right? he’s quite the hard worker. but you were taking a nap in the afternoon, after finishing your school work for the day

it’s probably reaching 3pm now, and izuku finished making new moves with his quirk, and he was eager to show you!

he didn’t want to do this but he ended up waking you up anyway, and he brought you outside to show you the new moves

“look at this, Y/N!” he says, all excited oh boy

what he didn’t expect was how fast he was going— missing the entire key move, and he started plummetting to the ground (similar to a ragdoll being thrown)

you were still partially dowsy, and you weren’t expecting him to fall to the ground like THAT, so you started laughing hard

and because you’re still drowsy, you don’t recognize that you’re actually laughing— yeah, izuku may be still on the ground, but wow. you’re laughing!!

he’s surely taken back, because he’s never actually seen you burst into laughter like this, he was just

yet, you immediately slap your hand over your mouth— when you realize that you’re actually laughing out loud, and snorting in front of your boyfriend wjdnwkx

“i’m sorry, izuku” you regain composure, immediately rushing to his aid to help him up, “you didn’t need to hear, or see that.”

but why are you apologizing? he’s the one that dragged you out here to see him fail 💀 “no, no! it’s fine Y/N. i was just surprised, that’s all.”

the expression on his face kind of worries you— because omg what if he thinks the laugh was ugly? i’ll never laugh again.

“i’d understand if you’d think my laugh was kind of ugly, izu—”

“what— it’s not ugly!” he’s quick to object “i think.. it’s really nice. it surprised me, but your laugh’s interesting! in the good way, and it’s also kind of cute, uhm—.” pls don’t give him a heart attack

you shake your head, because you already have a good idea of what he feels— and it’s quite positive. “i get it, izuku. thank you for the reassurance.”

he finally calms down when you give him a quick smooch on the lips. in short, you were the one to calm him down rip

todoroki shouto

he’s definitely curious about it

i mean, it’s a natural occurence at this point— shouto was already observant of you, what more when he started developing feelings for you

once again, not someone who freely laughs (he’s quite oblivious with the socializing part so it’s too be expected) but that doesn’t mean you should mirror him

like midoriya, he probably tried speaking to you about it— but you always reassured him that it was just a subconscious habit still odd but.. if you say so

so, shouto’s downstairs in the kitchen right? he’s preparing a snack to bring up to your room, and while he was trying his best to hurry up with it

you eventually trekked downstairs, and saw shouto preparing said snack. so what do you do? you surprise him!

“shouto!” you peak behind him, and he’s startled because he thought he was alone this entire time

so— he might’ve accidentally started a mini fire out of shock, and he’s quick to realize that

🧍 there’s a fire. that i’ve created. it was a miracle that he didn’t set off the alarms

the situation is handled pretty quickly, since he’s fast enough to put out the fire. but now, shouto’s just staring at the burned piece of snack.

silence.

“..there was an attempt.” he says it simply, while also equipped with a rather frazzled expression.

this causes you to burst out into a fit of laughter, snorting at the scene in front of you— the comment being oddly hilarious

he’s the personification of 🧍right now, and shouto’s just watching at the rare scene of you hunched over the kitchen counter, snorting from laughter

“i’m sorry, shouto.” you cover your mouth, still trying to regain your composure “i’m sorry that i scared you but.. it was kind of funny.”

shouto’s just thinking “..they were laughing.” not in a bad way, of course. he’s heard people laugh at his ‘jokes’ but this was definitely a different feeling.

shouto being well,, shouto. he’s going to be blunt with his words “your laugh is pretty.”

but your first reaction is 👁👁?? PRETTY?? “shouto, out of all the things my laugh could be— you chose pretty?” you’re looking at him like he’s crazy rn

he’s really confused like,, “yeah. your laugh is pretty, is that bad?”

so then you explain that you just never perceived your laugh as pretty, only because you ‘snorted like a pig’ he thought that was a little sad to hear

“i don’t see a reason that you should be ashamed of your laugh, Y/N.” he moves closer, setting a cool hand on your shoulder “every part of you is special in their own individual way. and i’ll love every part of it.”

“you,, mean that? like really??” you ask, and he confirms it with a nod, resting his head against your shoulder “i’m sorry that i burned your snack.”

“it’s fine. i’m sorry i scared you,”

“if it made you laugh then.. i’d say it’s worth it.” and you can’t really think that he’d lie, just by the way his mismatched eyes stare at you in pure adoration.

kaminari denki

the only person here that laughs freely whenever and wherever, he has that class clown type of beat

he was a little sad to see that you always covered your mouth whenever you laughed, since it sort of makes his day to see people laugh at his jokes

but of course, he’d never judge you— he may be curious about certain things but,, he’ll never secondguess you as a whole

similar to todoroki and midoriya, he’ll ask you in a lighthearted way on why you cover your mouth whenever you laugh

and you always brush it off, so he’d just have to respect that

i’d imagine that he’d encounter your laugh when you guys are doing your daily cracktivities

you guys were already quite good friends before you guys started dating, and this was quite a habit that always occurred maybe once or twice a week

the both of you were desperately trying to hold in the laughter that threatened to escape your lips, at 2am 💀

and the both of you guys were watching compilations of that talent show livestream on youtube (tiahra nelson’s to be specific)

so you’re still holding in your laughter, and reaches to that point in the video, where tiahra nelson was watching that dude sing ‘electric love’ (ref : this video)

seeing denki’s shocked reaction made you realize that— you just can’t hold it in anymore, so, you bursted into a fit of snorts and laughter, sliding onto denki’s shoulder

denki’s still holding in his laughter because he doesn’t want to get busted by iida or something— but oh my, YOUR LAUGH IS CONTAGIOUS TO HIM

he’s never heard you laugh this hard but omg, your laugh is contagious as hell— so he starts laughing with you 💀

eventually, the laughing does die down— and you guys move on to the next video. it’s oddly quiet at first, because the realization had just hit you and hard

you snorted in front of your boyfriend, and you’re sure that he doesn’t care that much but,, wow, you are embarrassed.

“wow— your laugh is contagious,” denki slides his hand across your shoulder, and while he’s been trying to keep the atmosphere at it’s normal, he’s quite nervous??

“it was a new experience uhm, sorry, i don’t know what i’m saying, and i know you’d be insecure about it all and..” he fumbles with his words for a bit, because denki isn’t THE BEST with serious things

“your laugh is cute.” his eyes are glued onto the screen, and his tone is basically stating that he’s right. your laugh is really cute

“you’re cheesy,” you playfully smack his chest, but you can’t help but feel quite bashful of his words

no but really,, whenever you laugh, denki starts to laugh along with you, since it’s so contagious he’s not that sorry about it

moving past the sappy shit, it’s quite helpful in cracktivities 💀

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likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, repost, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission :))

[luna-jaden-shadow]

Good Looking Mess

Request - Hey I have a request for Jade West X Female!Reader where maybe the reader is kina rich and popular from her family and she’s always wearing designer stuff and always looking good and beautiful and Jade just doesn’t like her that much but one day at a cafe before college or something Jade stops and she spots the reader in a far part of the cafe all alone wearing like sweat pants and her hair is in a messy bun and no make up and just looking amazing and Jade just falls in love and walks over to compliment her and the reader is like wtf but flirts back and Jade asks her out on a date? And they kiss? Sorry if that was long I thought it was a cute idea in my head lmao

Fluff 

Warning - None? 

Pairing - Jade West X Fem!Reader

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When you first came to school Jade was sure she wasn’t going to like you. A silent promise she made with herself to not be friends with you because you were too perfect for your own good. The way you dressed every day, hair tied up and make up without a flaw, almost like you thought you were better than other people, which to her you were. You made friends so easy, making a bond with Cat over her hair and your makeup. 

Being friends with Cat put you exactly where she didn’t want you, in her forced friend group. There was no avoiding you now, no point in actively hating you when someone would just yell at her for being rude to you. “Why don’t you like Y/n?” Tori ended up asking her one day during lunch. The two of them were the first at the table. 

Jade looked up at Tori from across the table, should she even answer her? She doesn’t even like Tori. Regardless, Jade let out an annoyed breath, “she’s annoying, just as annoying as you.” Jade snapped at the teen. Tori rolled her eyes, she didn’t say anything after that. When the rest of the group came she couldn’t help herself from glancing at you every now and then just to shoot mean comments in her head at you. 

This habit and her treatment of you carried on all through your duration of high school. Every time she was mean to you, she was rude to you, she tried to ignore you, you still held a smile on your face. You’re still one of the nicest people in the school, especially to her. 

End of the year. The posters of “farewell seniors” decorate the walls of the halls of the arts school. Lockers have been cleaned out, senior’s lockers have been stripped. It’s Sunday, about a week before graduation and the forced trip into college. Jade wanted coffee, something deep down told her to go to the little coffee shop on the corner. 

The door dings as she enters, taking a moment to look around the coffee shop. Off in the far corner she can just about make out what’s you sitting in a booth with your face basically stuffed in your computer. She looks you over, taking in the way that you’re dressed so differently than when you’re in school. 

The pair of gray sweatpants run down to your ankles, almost meeting the floor with how long they are on you. You don’t seem to have a care in the world at the moment, given the state that your hair is in. Jade’d guess you’d just rolled out of bed on that alone, the way it’s haphazardly thrown up into a bun with some pieces sticking out and a bit not even caught up in it, framing your face perfectly. 

Jade gets to the front of the line, ordering her coffee, the whole time she’s in a debate with herself, should she talk to you? Curiosity hits her like a brick about you and what you’re doing. “Here you are.” The woman behind the counter smiles, handing her the coffee about a minute or two after she had ordered. She’s half tempted to walk right back out of the coffee shop until she saw the look on your face when you let out a yawn and stretch. 

“Hey loser.” Jade calls as she walks to your seat. You look up, flashing a smile at the goth girl. “You look like a mess.”

You let out a laugh, pushing a loose strand of hair back. “Yeah, you’re right. You look way better.” She’s a bit taken back by your comment, catching the way that you look her over before meeting her eyes again. Were you serious?

Jade shakes the thought, taking a sip from her coffee. “You look good like this,” she tells you. “A mess but still good.” She patches up what she had said before, smirking when your face tints red from her words. “So listen,” you look up at her. “Do you wanna go see a movie or something?” First she bullies you, now she’s asking you on a date? It’s a full 180 from how she was acting before towards you.