#esp with him already trying to carry all his family's problems by himself.

[lightgriffinsect]

Aldryx: Guys, I’ve been meaning to tell you… Hunni and I are dating. Agoti, Tabi, Hunni, and Ayana: *gasp* Aldryx: Hunni, why are you surprised?!

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[bewareof12metersfrogs]

Warning: long rant. Probably messed up grammar. Not LXC-friendly.

So Pinterest gave me this:

And I was like

Ah yes, Lan Xichen.

I mean, I love that guy, but oh gosh that man is BLIND. Like, man's so blind Xue Yang could use him to slaughter people.

(I'm so sorry for that joke)

I really loved him when I first read the book, esp pre-Nightless City, but then I read it for the second (and third) time and that love turned into "uhh, I guess I kinda like him?"

I mean, in Sunshot Campaign arc, NMJ just got freaking tortured. He just got beaten, made to watch his men die, and his former deputy "betrayed" him -- and then LXC was just like, "oh da-ge CALM down, this is all part of OUR plan, A-Yao's our spy lol put Baxia away don't shout at him smh"

Why didn't LXC say to NMJ that the whole thing had been orchestrated? Okay, I get it, maybe he couldn't risk JGY getting caught, but couldn't he just tell NMJ, "hey, this is the plan. You're gonna get caught at Yangquan by WRH and our spy will take care of the rest of it" ? I'm pretty sure NMJ was angrier about his men getting slaughtered than himself getting beaten. NMJ is kinda like WWX; they were both idiots, but they cared about their people. Pretty sure he cared more about his men than himself. If he knew about the "plan", he'd most likely bring the disciples who were ready to die.

THEN LXC just went to NMJ like, "Hey let's be sworn brothers!". Xichen, dude, his wounds aren't even healed. I mean, it's a bit insensitive right?? I think it is. The whole sworn-brotherhood-right-after-shunshot-campaign thing still bothers me. To me, it seems like no one cared about NMJ. I mean, he was the leader of SC, people used his skills, his men, his everything, and then he was just, like, casted aside?? Pretty sure man's got PTSD. Also, qi deviation. Oh gosh I forgot about qi deviation.

Anyway, yeah, LXC was blind throughout the novel. I won't talk about the scene where Wangxian tried to tell him that A-Yao = bad, but I will talk about the scene where NHS decided to "use" his er-ge to kill his san-ge. Was it intentional? Perhaps. Was NHS lying? Maybe. Was it bad? Absolutely. Was it expected? Of course.

Let's put ourselves in NHS' shoes for a second. Your big bro, who is also the one who raised you and the only family you have left, died. People are quacking "oh it's the Nie curse, and isn't it such a tragedy?" BUT NO! One day you be minding your own business and then BAM you found out that da-ge'd been murdered and mutilated AND betrayed. So you started scheming for like a decade. Everything was going great, as great as a 10 years revenge plan could ever be. You just gotta wait for a few more hours, you just gotta listen to your nemesis' retelling his sad background story, you just gotta endure the pain of seeing your dead big bro wrecking havoc, and you'd have your revenge.

Then of course your er-ge, your big bro's best friend, gotta help your big bro's killer. He just gotta treat his wounds, huh? Pretty sure NHS was unstable. He was desperate and maybe even full of wrath. I understand that, at least, the same way I understand that maybe LXC tried to treat JGY's wounds because he still saw him as his brother -- he didn't want to lose another brother. But how about NHS? He was watching the man whom he thought was his brother treating the man who betrayed and murdered his actual brother. NHS was being a dick, yeah, but it was expected.

Think about this for a second. NMJ's corpse was still right there (and gosh, NHS had to sew his big bro's corpse by himself). NHS was RIGHT there, and LXC had the audacity to tend to JGY's wounds after the man himself admitted to his crimes. I think it's understandable if NHS felt at least insulted.

Also, he was perhaps sick of people not thinking that his big brother was as important as other people, that he was also a human being instead of just a war machine or even a mere tool that can be casted aside whenever they want to. Why did his brother have to die because of other people's greed and selfish decisions? Why did he have to lose the only family he had left forever and why did he have to just sit back and accept it?

Most importantly, LXC had been too blind for more than a decade too long.

Also, the bit about "You're Wangji's only mistake":

Bruh.

If WWX is LWJ's only mistake, then (trusting) LXC is NMJ's only mistake. I mean, sure, WWX is as dumb and oblivious as a rock, but can you really blame him?? HE WAS TRYING TO KEEP HIMSELF, HIS FAMILY, AND THE WEN REMNANTS ALIVE, DUDE'S GOT NO TIME TO THINK ABOUT FKING ROMANCE.

Sorry, I got carried away.

Anyway, are we just gonna ignore the fact that LWJ had been acting like he hated WWX since, like, the first time they met?? I mean, I really love LWJ, but his only mistake is his communication skills (or lack thereof).

But LWJ never gave up on WWX. He learned to express himself way better. Man's got dedication and he's not afraid to learn. I really love that about him.

Also, I understand that LXC was angry because LWJ took beatings to protect WWX, but I don't think he had the right to blame WWX for that. Yes, I know WWX did plenty of things wrong; he was extremely reckless and untrusting, but he never asked LWJ to protect him. LWJ did everything voluntarily. Ffs Xichen WWX didn't even know that LWJ did that. You know why? CAUSE HE WAS FKING DYING THAT'S WHY.

TLDR: LWJ was a grown ass man.

Okay. So, do I hate LXC? No. But do I find him flawed? Yes. But that's why I like MXTX's characters, including WRH, JGY, and LXC (the only exception are perhaps JGS and MXY's fam, and I think we all know why). They all have flaws. For me, LXC is too naive and blind, JGY is too power-hungry and selfish, and NMJ is too stubborn and unyielding. NHS? Well, he's a lot of things. He's manipulative, unsympathetic, and IMO he's got a problem with obsession too. He and JGY are alike, in my opinion. The main difference is their goals: JGY seeks power, NHS seeks revenge.

Everyone has flaws. LWJ and WWX have flaws too; they're EXTREMELY flawed. Heck, even our lord and saviour Shijie also has flaws, as much as it hurts me to type that.

Then why do I get so worked up about LXC's flaws? Honestly I don't really know. Maybe it's because I'm tired of (almost) the entirety of fandom treating him like a god, maybe because I'm tired of people who treat NHS like the devil himself, or maybe because I'm disappointed in him. I mean, JGY's our main villain, but I still love him so much. Heck, I love him even more than I love LXC. Bruh, nowadays I even like WRH more. At least that guy is downright evil and he looks cool while doing whatever evil things WRH does (I'm talking about the novel and donghua mmkay).

Anyway, this is the end of my rant. I apologise if I'm offending you, this is just something that's been bothering me since the first time I re-read MDZS. This whole thing is like a plot bunny but instead of a "plot", the bunny is shaped like a "rant". This is a rant bunny. I need to get this outta my head. I've edited this thing like four times already because I keep finding errors and stuffs. I also added like two new paragraphs.

I'm sad now.

[diffuserlover]

hi love !! may i please get personality ship with ateez, txt, and enhypen (but with the hyung line only/sunghoon and up!!! but if you originally shipped me with someone in the maknae line, i'd also love to know too !) i got so carried away with writing, so you can cut the personality part when posting my ship! tysm in advance

I’m an ‘03 liner that’s 5’9.5 (basically 5’10) girl with dark skin, jet black hair (currently in long twists rn!!), and i’m on the curvier side (esp hips and my thighs) !! some of my favorite features are my plump lips (and i have a beauty mark on my bottom lip!), my long legs (they’re 40.5 inches long and look so good in dresses and skirts <33), my kempt and pretty fingernails, and my eyelashes !!! i’m a virgo (and surprisingly i get along with all the signs, i cant think of a sole zodiac sign i DONT mix well with), and i am an i/enfj (i got 51% extravert 49% intra the first time, then 50% for both the second time!! ) and i honestly agree—i’m an ambivert all the way! i often come off as cold/shy when meeting new people (one of my closest friends avoided me for a month before meeting me because i looked so intimidating LMAO), but once you get close to me i turn into a bundle of warmth and love: i will never stop texting them the <3 emoji every morning or buying my friends/s/o their favorite starbucks order when they need a little cheer-me-up.

i’m extremely passionate about the issues and people i care about and the goals and dreams i have. I’m creative, patient, an extremely good listener, caring, a social butterfly, and extremely hardworking. my friends always told me of my heart of gold and how perceptive i am of the people around me—noticing immediately when something is wrong and trying to make them feel better. I’m also very headstrong, detailed, and determined!! my friends also call me a nerd since i’ve had all a’s since kindergarten—i LOVE school/education and would describe myself as intelligent. i really like that i’m empathetic and motivational to those around me. it’s really easy for me to show my affection, adoration, and support for someone because i just want everyone to feel loved and safe :( i HATE seeing my loved ones sad, and when people usually have problems about anything (from family to just school), i’m the one they come to talk to because of my warm and openminded heart. I love sharing happiness with my friends in their goals and always hype them up no matter what, and it makes me so so so so happy seeing my loved ones content, comfortable, accepted, and just knowing that they mean so much to me and that they’re loved. im also really, really funny (my fave personality trait of mine tbh)!! I’m always cracking jokes and laughing (sometimes for no reason LMAOO). i would be in the library at like 7 am with my friends and struggle with stifling my laugh from jokes i told </3 although i’m extremely nice and outgoing, i’m not afraid to stand my ground (most of the time) and am super defensive (esp about topics like blm, antiblackness in our world, cultural insensitivity/appropriation, sexism/racism/ableism/homophobia), so if someone says some shit out of pocket, i will not be afraid to put them in their place !!! a lot of people (especially older/more traditional folk) do not like that but i could care less <3 some useless facts about me: i love love love afrobeats (nigerian gyal here), some k-pop groups (bts, txt, enha, ateez, gwsn, p1h, and some 2nd gen groups!), and r&b (rihanna and bey and aaliyah <33). i LOVE to play roblox, i’ve been to 14/50 US states, i can do VERY simple makeup, people often think my nails are acrylics bc they’re long and i love doing nail art on them), and i know all the lyrics and adlibs to enhypen’s given-taken 😋 if i could describe myself in a word, it’d be openminded!! and my dreams for the future are 1) to be truly happy and comfortable (which includes finding my true love <33) 2) to make a change on the people around me and the world itself (preferably through healthcare so i can mend health disparities in POC and low-income neighborhood!!), and i love junk food (I SHOULDNT but it’s so good). I also LOVE law and order svu and forensic files, princess and the frog, tangled, and penthouse !!!!!

I also love to go out and explore—whether trying out a new restaurant in the city or a newly opened amusement park or trying something new, like skydiving (or some other crazy but fun idea), trying recipes from around the world, or trying sledding for the first time! at the same time, i like really chill, mellow spending-time-alone-or-with-one-other-person activities like baking (my favorite treat to bake is red velvet cupcakes and cheddar bay biscuits) and dancing !! (i’ve been a dancer for more than 12 years!!). i can also speak more than 5 languages (including korean!) and i’m always saying random phrases (like thank you, i love u so much!, gtfo my face, that sucks ass) in a random language too LMFAOOO. i often think being a coffee/cafe lover is a personality trait (i love love love love love coffee) i also love accessories (earrings, necklaces, bracelets, anklets, rings, etc) and would die of happiness when the day i can wear matching accessories with my s/o comes. i also love cleaning/keeping my spaces clean and i hate a dirty house </3

besides being my bestfriend who i can kiss and whatnot (hehe), my ideal type is a TALL (like my 5’9+/i’m already tall but pls .5 of an inch taller would be enough) man who has eyes for me and only me !!! they may look cold/cool/mysterious/laid back at first glance (like “yeah haha 🙂" to any other girls but “hi baby what can i do for u today to please the loml” with me <3) but turn into the sweetest, warmest, cutest honey bun once i get to know them! (kinda like me)!! ALSO a man who can pull off all black outfits like those are my FAVORITE omg. he needs to be FUNNY and have a BIG sense of humor (like i want to laugh every second i’m with him and laugh so hard that our stomachs start hurting and we beg each other to stop making jokes type of humor), fashionable (so i can learn fashion pls and wear coordinated outfits with him). i just want a boy who i could talk to and listen to for HOURS. like i would follow him into the bathroom as he showers and sit on the toilet and just listen to him talk about his day or vent to him, but also a boy that loves comfortable silence!! like we can spend the whole together and come back to the house where im studying and he’s working on a personal project so that just being with him makes me feel warm <3 i want a s/o who’s willing to go out and travel with me so i could take off guard pics of him and make him my wallpaper until he begs me to change it. im also not good at conflict so if conflict arises, id love a boy who knows how to talk me down and open up the room for conversation and make me feel safe and not as if im confronted or wrong, someone where we can just talk, resolve our problem, and make it up with a hug or night out!! this kinda leads to me wanting a relationship where we both help improve each other and our flaws (for example some of my flaws are callousness, taking things to heart sometimes, and not opening up easily, etc), so i’d really appreciate a relationship where my partner and i can help each other grow as people. i also love love love to cook, so i’d love an s/o that loves cooking with me and teaching each other how to cook each other’s cultural foods (i would love to teach my bf how to cook jollof rice and have a cookoff one day). i also want a boy that i can tease (i love to tease people omg) <3 like i could say “u look like a cute tomato when u blush <3333” to “and that’s why you got a fat ass head” and we’d just laugh and he’d tease me back <33 I like ALL 5 of the love languages (im a hopeless romantic ik) but my top 3 tied for 1st are quality time (HEAVY ON THE QUALITY TIME i want to spend everyday with my bf at chinatown or a new city exploring), words of affirmation (someone who reaffirms me of their love continuously, supportively, and in sweet ways), and acts of service (cooking my favorite food when i’m down, doing chores that i cant do when tired). men who are really expressive through touch are also ideal <3 i'd shy away from pda, but inside the house i’d be so happy yet so shy and flustered when they express their love through touch (like laying in my lap so i can play with their hair, holding my hand while watching tv, cuddling while talking about whatever). OR like the SLIGHTEST compliment or act of love (LIKE BACKHUGS OR HOLDING HANDS OR KISSING MY BEAUTY MARKS OR FOREHEAD KISSESJSJSJSJ) i’d just love to be really appreciated and loved and also show the same love, support, warmth, closeness, and happiness to my bf <3

THANK U SO MUCH AAAA i honestly cant wait for my ship!! have an amazing day/afternoon/evening <3

Hiii! Thank you so much for requesting!! I really hope you like it!! Btw you seem like the sweetest person ever and you are literally perfection<3

ATEEZ:

I ship you with...

Seonghwa

Okay! I literally was going between Mingi and Seonghwa the whole time but when reading your ideal type I was thinking more Seonghwa!

You said you like someone who is kinda cold on the outside but sweet when you get to know them and Seonghwa is literally the definition of that🤣

He can also pull off those black outfits you like(I’m simping lmaoo)😚

Wooyoung might disagree but I think Seonghwa is funny and you guys would always make each other laugh😄

He would 100% wear matching outfits with you(he wouldn’t be able to stop smiling)😆

Seonghwa would be open about his feeling with you🙂

He truly appreciates that you always listen to him and will always just let him talk out his day(he always lets you talk first, what a gentleman)🥺

I could see you sitting at the desk or table studying while he’s walking around cleaning and it wouldn’t be awkward 😁

Seonghwa doesn’t seem like the type to yell at you unless he was really really mad, he is more of the problem solver in my eyes so I think he would be that person to talk you down and have a conversation with you instead of yelling😊

I feel Seonghwa would really want to connect to you on a deeper emotional level, he would open up more the longer you guys are together😭🥰

Seonghwa does like to cook but isn’t like the worlds most amazing chef so I could see you guys cooking together 😋

Little cooking dates where you have fun competitions to see who’s dish is better🤩

He would let you tease him if it’s all light hearted but he would always tease you back💀

I think Seonghwa is a little bit shy about skinship but sees that you like when he initiates it so he really tries🥺

Your height is nearly the same so I don’t think either of you would mind the height difference 😁

He would always complement the beauty mark on your lip or your legs cause he know how much you like it lol😇

You both are extroverts so you guys go out a lot more often🙂

He likes how you take care of him when he’s having a bad day like getting him a drink or snacks or a simple text message when he’s at work🥰

He would be inspired by how passionate you are about issues around the world and would always ask you what he can do to help you or anything☺️

He likes how your always laughing or making jokes because he loves your smile and it always makes him smile😭😭

Because of your long nails he really likes when you play with his hair😚

He loves to hear you speak in all the languages you speak(he is really impressed)😋

You both don’t like a dirty house and you guys are clean all the time lol🤣

Overall, You and Seonghwa have a really deep relationship and really care for each other🥰🥺

TXT:

I ship you with...

Yeonjun

Yeonjun is effortlessly funny so I feel like he would always make you laugh and you would always make him laugh😄

Yeonjun is really into fashion and would gladly wearing matching outfits with you

He also pulls off a black outfit just like you said you like🤩

He would constantly buy you accessories because he knows how much you like them🥰

Yeonjun is definitely pretty clingy to you😚

He is taller than you by like 1 inch 😋

Yeonjun is cold looking on the outside and is a cinnamon roll on the inside😆

He will probably beg you for a puppy(a welsh corrgi) a lot💀

I feel like Yeonjun would be okay with comfortable silence if he is in the mood

He is a talkative person so I feel like your conversations would never end😊

I don’t know how arguments could go with him, I feel like it depends on how he is that day🙂

You guys love cooking together with music blasting throughout the house😚

If he gives up on helping you he will cling to you and back hug you until your done in the kitchen😭🥺

He loves to complement you until your super super flustered ☺️🤣

He probably likes how clean you are🙂

For your birthday he got you a little necklace with a lock on it and he has the key for the lock and when you open it, it has your guys initials together😭

He would probably take you to the studio and have a little dance battle 🤩

He would be willing to explore with you though I feel he would rather be at home with you alone😁

He finds it inspiring how passionate you are about issues around the world and often looks up to you for it😊

You guys get matching nails!!😄

You guys are on the higher side of zodiac sign compatibility😇

Overall, you and Yeonjun are the cutest and are literally couple goals 😍

Enhypen:

I ship you with...

Sunghoon

You guys are the same height😌

Sunghoon would pull off that black outfit you like!😅

I feel like it would take him some time to initiate skinship and be affectionate with you but when he does he can’t let go of you😊

He loves when you play with his hair🥺

I feel like he loves just spending time with you and being with you🤩

He likes to hold your hand😇

He bought you for your birthday match rings☺️

Sunghoon doesn’t know how to cook so be patient with him but he will always turn cooking into some competitive thing😆

I think it would take him a while to completely open up to you but he still likes to talk things out with you🥺

He is so beautiful how can you not take photos of him and set them as your wallpaper(he definitely begs to you to change it but also loves it and doesn’t want you to change it)🤣

He loves how he can always talk to you about absolutely anything😁

Introverts and extroverts go best with each other🙂

He is very cold and distant looking at first but we all know how sweet and baby like he is on the inside😁😊

He is really interested in the things you are passionate about and is constantly asking you questions 🤩

He finds himself smiling when thinking about you😭🥰

You always make him laugh, it’s one of his favorite things about you😄

He would laugh as you guys blast given or taken through the house and you sing the whole thing dancing around(grab his hands and make him dance with you)😂😚

I could see you guys eating fast food in your car in some random parking lot just talking and listening to music looking at all the stars🥺

Drag him out to do this with you😆

He likes how clean you are🙂

Overall, I think you and Sunghoon are so sweet together🥰

[kewltie]

anyway, abo au where alpha prohero ground zero decides it's time to start a family of his own but he doesn't have a mate and neither does he want one so he signs up for an omega surrogate program & meet his former childhood friend who will now carry his baby for him. 

izuku is a male omega w/ v v v high fertility even for his secondary sex and a strong body which make him an ideal surrogate to give birth healthy babies. w/ the program izuku contracted, izuku had given birth to several babies for various ppl over the years & babies are all happy and that's all that matter.

being a surrogate wasn't ever part of his dream but izuku is an omega & quirkless in a world that doesn't exactly appreciate either. one day when he was fruitlessly working at his 9 to 5 job, a rep from the company approached him w/ a pamphlet about surrogacy. the paid is v v good, the prenatal care & pregnancy compensation is all taken care of by the clients and his company, and he can select and choose which jobs to take. many families and ppl in the world cant have kids of their own for various reasons and izuku is HELPING THEM ACHIEVE THEIR DREAM. in his own way izuku is helping these people!!!!  He may not be saving lives has a hero that he always wanted to be but he's giving them their hope and dream in a child they all want so izuku does his job proudly. the only sadness he gets from it that once it's over the baby isn't his anymore bc he's contracted to sign over his parental rights to his clients.

so he tries desperately not to fall desperately in love w/ each of the babies he had. it's... tough but he loves them all the same. the good point is that some of his clients will let him talk and meet w/ their child’s birth parent so izuku isn't deprived of that connection.

it's a quiet and unconventional job, but izuku is happy w/ this lifestyle that he had chosen even as it make DATING AN ABSOLUTE pain. how do you explain to ppl that no you're not marry yet or date anyone but you have several kids floating around all over japan in various household??? lol /o\ this made him feel terribly alone thinking how he wants a family of his own one day after seeing how he's making his client so happy w/ their new baby in their arms. happiness wrapped in a surreal sadness as he watched his babies w/ their new family wishing for that happiness for himself one day but while izuku is settled in his bubble of melancholy an solitude, katsuki BUSTED DOWN THAT DOOR when he made a requested to have a surrogate. NOT JUST ANYONE WILL DO, the best one you FUCKING GOT: experience, results, good health, strong quirk, smart, and not some fucking easy omega.

the qualifications and requirements are obscene and ridiculous lolol but he paid through the roof to get the absolute best for his future child. izuku hits every one of these markers except... for the quirk one. the program hesitate to bring the two to meet but katsuki is impatience. he had been delayed and delayed over and over again for months as they try to match up a good surrogate partner for him. every one of them he had quickly rejected v v loudly and walked out on the meeting. izuku is literally their last hope as katsuki throws another fit.

katsuki is getting older now, close to his 30s annd still stuck in singlehood while all his colleagues and friends settle down with a family of their own. his parents, esp his old hag, has been relentlessly nagging him to GIVE HER A BABY ALREADY SHE WANTS TO BE A GRANDMA BEFORE SHE DIE so w/ all kind of pressures, he said fuck it, i'll give you a fucking BABY but i dont need a mate to do it but in truth he earnestly does want a baby for his own bc the idea of raising a tiny human w/ all the trails and errors and potentially fucking up is humbling & huge responsibility.  he thinks he’s up for it like the pro-stage where he's standing at the top now, he can conquered it w sheer force and effort as he does w/ any challenge that he face. Parenthood will be his greatest battle and hurdle he has to overcome and he's going to fucking ACE IT. so katsuki is 10000% in this and he wants the best surrogate for his baby.

the program finally have izuku & katsuki meet after wasting 5 months of trying to find katsuki a suitable partner that he won't reject right away. so their first meeting go something like this: multiple slam doors, a table is flipped, and a lot of yelling.

it went great because izuku is hired right away. Just kidding.

katsuki had thought it was some giant fucking joke the moment izuku had walked through that door. "Who the fuck set this up?!" he demanded, kicking a coffee table over. so furious that his hands were shaking bc the idea of the length he'd went through and hoops he'd jumped over to get here JUST SO HE CAN BE MAKE A FOOL OUT OF, he'd stormed out a sec later, slamming doors violently on his way out and they had to dragged his ass back w/ the fervent promise that no IT'S NOT A PRANK AND WE HAVE NOTHING TO DO W/ CHARGEBOLT OR RED RIOT, PLS PLS LISTEN TO US.

he came back to izuku's unperturbed face as he took a sip of his coffee and katsuki snapped defensively, "i hope you won't fucking be drinking that piss when you're pregnant with my baby."

Unimpressed, Izuku replied, "good thing im not pregnant yet bc who said i would agree."

Flustered and red in the face w/ anger bc THE AUDACITY OF IZUKU TO REJECT HIM WHEN KATSUKI SHOULD BE THE ONE TO DOING IN THE FIRST PLACE!! izuku was the one who doesn't deserve to carry his child!! but the director of the program hurriedly assured him that izuku IS THE *BEST*. he got a pages of recommendation/referral, glowing reviews, and every client of his had never been happier bc of him. all his pregnancy were carried to full term and the babies are all good & strong. izuku himself go the gym when he's not on the job, keeping a healthy lifestyle. he doesn't drink or smoke (which katsuki emphasized in his requirement) and his family doesn't have any record any genetic disorder. he may not have finish college but he test high in his IQ and he take his job v v v seriously. the only problem was... he's quirkless.

it's a thing izuku always make it point for all his clients to know what they could potentially get w/ their children if they chose him. some walked away but most stayed with bc izuku is THE BEST OF THE BEST and they want kid more than they want a manufactured perfect child.

"will that be a problem?" izuku asked, meeting his eyes dead on. "does the thought of having a quirkless child anger you?"

katsuki bristles, clenching & unclenching his hands at his side. though no much had change over the years, he's older now, not that dumbass kid anymore, misguided by his own sense of pride and arrogance and warped by prejudice and the superiority of his quirk. He had left that behind in UA, who happily beaten the idiocy out of him. now, he doesn't care if his child is quirkless or not bc they're his and he'll raise and love them all the same. if the world treat his kid crap for being quirkless, he'll teach them to fuck the world up till it bow down and kiss their ass bc they're a bakugou and they don't settle for anything less, which brought back to the point that izuku REALLY IS THE BEST THEY GOT.

so he shook his head and said, "it doesn't matter whether they're quirkless or not bc they're mine and i always take good care of what's mine."

Izuku's eyes widen and for fraction of a second his cool mask of difference crack under katsuki's heartfelt and sincere words. They havent seen each other since middle school, that’s over a decade, and katsuki truly have grown up into someone the entire world can admire and hold up on a pedestal as the no. 1 hero in the country.

"And what about you? you're okay with me?" katsuki retorted. "with the kind of volatile *history* that we shared."

Izuku paused, and then, he said quietly, "i'm not that petty to deny you a child bc of our past bc neither of us are the kids we were back then."

katsuki stood up. "get him the paperworks and have him sign it. i want him and nobody else."

Izuku jerked up in surprised. "that's it? you dont want to ask me anything else? don't you want to go through my records and background to make sure that im the right fit for you."

katsuki stared down at him and it was like pinned under glass before he said, "we may have changed, but something are still the same. you still want to help ppl even if this is a roundabout way  to do it. i trust my instinct and my instinct is screaming at me to give you a fucking chance." He looked away, scratching the back of his head as he continued, "if there's one thing that is made clear to me now is that you're a good person and i was a shittyass kid for not realizing that sooner."

izuku's breath hitched. it's not an apology but it's damn close.

and with that he left izuku dizzy with a confusing cocktail of warmth, shock, and something far too nebulous and strange for him to put a finger to yet. when he first realized it was katsuki who was looking for a surrogate, he'd steel himself of the rejection & lashing out to come. izuku had spent his entire life rejected one way or another, so he was mentally prepare for this to be added to pile esp from the man who had hurt him repeatedly before. when katsuki had left for U.A. and izuku in the dust, they rarely have anything to do w/ each other after that even as he'd followed katsuki meteoric rise to the top, his blazing trajectory that placed him as the current no.1 bc despite everything, katsuki truly is amazing and deserved his place. he just never thought they would meet again in the sort of situation where a baby is the bargaining chip.

izuku was prepared for everything that katsuki would throw at him... but not his fervent agreement. now, izuku got to face the fact that for a year they're going to spend in each other pocket as izuku tries to carry not only katsuki's baby but his hope and future too. it's going to be either a total nightmare or some v v surreal dream bc it's bakugou katsuki with all that fame and temper and strong armed will and izuku is just... plain old izuku. he never had a client w/ such power and weight to throw around and so high profile that every know his name.

oh what did he sign up for, izuku thought as the door to the meeting room was slammed open again and katsuki glared at the director. "wait i want it all to be done today," katsuki said. "put my sperms in him as soon as possible."

izuku dropped his face into his hand and sighed.

the process of getting izuku impregnated is all v clinical and boring. izuku goes under a pseudo heat simulation that fool his body to think he's actually going into heat so his fertility up even more so during this period and he get artificially inseminated w/ katsuki's sperm. this is actually a process and takes several days & even weeks to prepare bc waiting for izuku's most fertile window during his heat period is v v important to have higher chance of success NORMALLY but w/ advance tech izuku can go under a pseudo heat that trigger release of eggs  so they can get it all done pretty quickly and dont have to wait for nature to set it up for them.

katsuki already provided enough sperm to last a fucking lifetime bc he's an overly prepared asshole and it's three days later when they meet back at the clinic to start the process. all of this is under the watchful care of doctors and nurses to make sure everything go right. izuku had done this many times before for his previous clients so this isn't new to him at all but it's the first time that a client specifically demand to be part of the entire process.

izuku stares him down and tells him in no uncertain detail bc it's already weird enough to be the one to carry his former childhood friend's baby but to have him watch izuku get inseminated w/ his sperm?? YEA OK, no. katsuki glowers bc he just want everything to GO SMOOTHLY. his micromanagement & obsessiveness drives the clinic insane but izuku kinda finds it funny and cute?? maybe bc he's aware that it's just katsuki's nerves acting up since this is so terribly new and terrifying for him and HE DOESN'T LIKE IT WHEN THINGS ARENT UNDER HIS CONTROL.

neither katsuki or izuku is alone this bc surrogacy isn't about either them it's about the baby and the ppl who helps make it possible and that's both of them. the surrogate who carries the unborn fetus and donor who gives a part of themselves to make it all possible. izuku hesitates before deciding screw it & reaches out and holds katsuki's hand in comfort AS THOUGH KATSUKI THE ONE GETTING THE PROCEDURE DONE TO HIM. "i'll be fine," he insists. "i've done this plenty of times before and dr. abe even longer than that with 20yrs of experience so i'll be ok."

"I'm not worry," katsuki snaps, even though he squeezes Izuku's hand hard enough that izuku is afraid his bones might crack under the pressure. "i know you'll be fucking fine, wont he dr. abe?" he stares down at the doctor with the full force of his wrath that the doctor shifts nervously.

"o-of course, bakugou-san," dr abe is quick to assure him. "our best ppl is on the job."

izuku rolls his eyes bc while heat inducing artificial insemination isn't exactly a new tech but there's a risk to any kind of medical procedure. it's low though and izuku isn't worry.

katsuki lets him go and izuku just sends him a quick reassuring smile over his shoulder even as katsuki can't take his eyes off of the entire trip to the surgical room. the process takes around 1-2 hours max & izuku comes out of it mostly woozy & still under heat related stress.

he needs to rest the next few days as he lets nature and w/ the help of science takes it course. izuku rests up at the clinic that provide him 24hrs care to make sure everything is alright which is all normal and part of the procedure. what surprise him is that katsuki visiting him DAILY. he actually bring izuku's home cooked meals that are carefully & thoughtfully prepared (healthy food choices!!) that it silences him for a moment.

"you know im not pregnant yet," izuku points out helpfully. "do you want me to explain how biology work in case UA didn't go over it in their curriculum?"

"shut your face and just eat," katsuki says with a glower, and watches intensely as izuku eats every bite and not leave a single piece behind. while there he harasses izuku's nurses and doctors, asking for izuku's vital stats and probing questions about the surgery & his health.it's so annoying and overbearing, but izuku can't help the smile threatening to break through his defense bc that's just like katsuki shoving his business into everything and dominating the entire process even though it is IZUKU who is going through it all. it's dreadfully cute.

izuku is fully recovered after several days of rest as expected and he is, once again surprised, to see katsuki is right there every step of the way as he is release from the clinic. katsuki who took a short shift today just so he can pick izuku up, which IS SUPER RARE. katsuki is a total workaholic and married to his job kind of pro hero so for him to take half a day off is beyond shocking for everyone?? bc HE GOT ENOUGH VACATION/SICK DAYS TO TAKE SEVERAL MONTHS OFF w/o any worry, but he came to take izuku home and make sure everything is in order.

it's not that izuku didn't have any clients wanting to be so involve in the whole surrogacy/pregnancy process but katsuki takes it into a whole new lvl w/ how much he inserts himself into izuku's life like it's not just the baby he care about but izuku too. he delivers izuku home and make sure izuku have his emergency contacts at all time in case ANYTHING, ABSOLUTEY ANYTHING HAPPEN and he wants izuku to text him daily with updates even for stupid things. he's obsessive and demanding and nervous, and izuku thinks it's funny as hell.

so for the next several weeks, izuku flood katsuki's phone w/ commentary about his days that HAS NOTHING TO DO W/ his chance of being pregnant. since izuku full time job is just being a surrogate, he mostly spend his days wandering around the city, reading, volunteering, etc. izuku updates katsuki on his daily activities and while he doesn't always get a reply immediately but his updates are always left on read and sometimes katsuki would leave some *encouraging* word like 'yea,' or 'okay' and izuku doesn't know why but he finds them comforting all the same.

 when he wanders around the city, he'll text katsuki his coordinates bc katsuki is paranoid &wants him to keep away from dangerous area or area under villain attack, he would take pictures of the heroes he see and katsuki would have a snarky comments on each & every one of them. it's in this moments that the two of them really come alive. izuku get a glimpse of the world that he could have had if he had a quirk and pursue his dream of going pro hero and insights on what it's like to be bakugou katsuki, the man standing at the pinnacle of the pro hero scene.

At this point katsuki is even more engaged in izuku's text now. he becomes interest in the books izuku is currently reading, the outreach programs izuku super passionate about esp for young and disenfranchise quirkless youths. then there are izuku's rowdy neighbors and their hilariously complicated love life that izuku is terribly invested bc of his lack of one.

"i think higa-san is going to break up with him today," izuku would update him one day, after watching his neighbors have another blow out.

katsuki texts back an hour later: "yea right, the guy is spineless coward. he wouldn't ever go through it."

izuku lets out a smile as he stares down at the text. it's the most fun izuku ever had in the middle of a job that he forget they're not friends at all but client and surrogate. this is a job for him and izuku is an end to a mean for katsuki. it doesn't mean anything. It couldn’t mean anything. Why is he even trying?

Izuku has been doing the job for seven years and carried his pregnancy to full terms five times. he knows the routine even though each client he had were different from one another and not all pregnancy are the same, but he knows what to expect and prepare. nothing truly surprised him anymore. Or at least they shouldn’t. ,his world didn't suddenly change w/ katsuki's arrival in his ordinary life. izuku is still very much the same person, but all the same he wake up everyday w/ renews energy and lightens heart, looking forward to seeing the text notification from katsuki popping up on his phone screen.

he finds himself looking forward to their interaction the most throughout his days. a glimpse into katsuki's world and what it means to be a part of his life again however temporary it is bc izuku knows there is a time limit to this. he's only allow to talk like this w/ katsuki bc he's doing him a favor, a job, an obligation in exchange of money. they're in a relationship artificially made, they're not friends or colleagues and izuku may be carrying katsuki's baby in the future but he's not a parent w/ katsuki.

He’s an incubator.

these thoughts feel tangibly familiar to his past cases where he had carried the fetus to full term and had to part ways with his baby and the client/parents and separate himself from their lives after the birth but it had never hurt in this way like the thoughts alone would cut his heart into pieces now. it's beyond selfish to get attach and izuku tries to maintain a careful distance w/ katsuki bc they're client and an employee, but katsuki is relentless. he won't settle for just for pieces of izuku and his life. he wants it all. Izuku may be weak enough to give it to him…

 he invests himself into izuku's life, his interest, his worries and thoughts. to katsuki, izuku isn't just an incubator but someone who shares the other half of his baby's genes so of fucking course he IS INVESTED BC izuku is just as important as the fetus he could be carrying right now but izuku has a hard time wrapping his head around it bc while izuku was w/ his other client they were all kind and caring to him during his surrogacy but never to this length. they weren't interest in him as a person but someone who is a means to an end, a tool to make their dream come true.

izuku isn't hurt by that regard bc he knows getting involve w/ your surrogate can be a hot mess & confusing for the baby growing up so izuku knows how to keep his distance and careful to keep his heart walled up but katsuki has a habit of breaking things. He’s so very, very good at it, especially distubring the peace of izuku’s heart.

katsuki may be relentless w/ his attention & dedication but izuku's walls went down embarrassingly easy as though he was waiting for katsuki to reach out toward him after all the years apart and shake him loose from his bubble of solitude. katsuki doesn't realize how affected izuku is by his clumsy and gestures, but izuku won't tell. He’s too embarrassed to ever bring it up because even after all these years katsuki still has such a sever effect on him.

so izuku lends himself to enjoy this upcoming months as much as he can bc once it's over they will part ways again as though they exist solely in different space and the only chance he'll get to see katsuki and the baby is through the screen of his tv. it doesn't bring him any comfort but it's manageable. izuku can deal with it. he got years to get used to it by now.  It’s not gentle but it’s a blunt kind of truth that mend with time.

several weeks after since izuku did the procedure, he doesn't feel any different but izuku wakes up one morning and he could feel a strangeness settling over his body. there are a lot of old wives tales about pregnant omegas and women and most of them are false, standing against scientific knowledge but izuku been going around this block five times already, so he realizes there may be some truths to a few of them.

he gets out of bed and makes breakfast before making sure to send a text and photo to katsuki about his meals bc katsuki is ANAL about making izuku eat right. katsuki motherhenning him miles away even as he is out on patrol is still the most hilarious and weirdly sweet thing, izuku finds. it doesn't feel suffocating at all to him. sometimes he when the thought slip out of him unconsciously he thinks this is what it's like to have an alpha of his own, but katsuki isn't his by any means.

izuku forgoes his favorite breakfast meal this time and go for something he rarely eats. a food that he normally doesn't chose but it feels right this time. it all clicks. the signs were all there several days back. the frequent bathroom usage, his breasts throbbing, and cramps. he'd seen it already but this morning it lines up perfectly like it was all meant to be, like everything is built up just for this moment right here.

so with a bounce to his steps, he waits for katsuki's text back. It takes a few mins when katsuki get back from his morning run bc he got a routine and is terribly predictable in that regard. his following texts rip into izuku's choice of food bc IT ISN'T HIS USUAL at all and katsuki have colorful words about the kind of junk izuku force feed into his body and DOESN'T HE KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF. HOW THE FUCK DID HE SURVIVES ALL THESE YEARS ON HIS OWN.

izuku smiles down at his phone even though katsuki is blasting him and everything he choose to be, but HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT ALL MEANS. it's kinda adorable so when katsuki get into a slow rant about food group and healthy life choices, izuku cuts in:

me: oh btw im pregnant :)

he didn't get any get any respond from katsuki for the next five mins so during that time izuku makes fresh cup of juice to drink while katsuki works to settle down his panic. when he comes back fifteen mins later, it's to a series of angry keymash and texts.

kacchan: a;sjdasdf

kacchan: as;dlifucccck

kacchan: fuck fuck fuck

kacchan: are you serious?!

kacchan: DONT FUCKING JOKE WIHT ME DEKU

kacchan: i'm coming over right now

kacchan: you better be sitting down

kacchan: don't fucking move even an inch

kacchan: YOU HEAR ME

me: ok

izuku sits there peacefully, enjoying his cup of juice as he waits for katsuki's arrival. one of his hand rests over his stomach carefully & though he hadn't taken any test or get his bloodwork done, he knows, instinctively & intimately that there is a life growing inside of him.

it's all very silly and unproven since there's no concrete evidence to support any of it, but maybe it's his omega instinct, maybe it's his experience as a carrier who brought five children into this world, or maybe it's just wishful thinking on his part, but he knows and this is a truth that won’t be brought down.

izuku takes his job v seriously bc people's happiness hinged on his ability to give them a child they earnestly had wished for so he of course he would want to be pregnant as soon as possible, but--izuku looks down at his stomach, this time even more so he wants it to be real.

 he wants to be the one to fulfilled katsuki's earnest wish and give him the child he desired. it's as much a part of his job, his duty, but also something he selfishly wants for himself. this baby, this child will be his only connection to katsuki once his job his completed. they'll part ways after this--no more late night phone calls, morning texts, and silly anecdotes they exchange to each other everyday bc izuku is unlikely to ever see him again. their worlds are just too far apart, like the two planets stuck in orbit but never meeting but at least with this child, izuku knows there is always a piece of him w/ katsuki always. so more than anything, this child will be his gift to katsuki.

he picks up his phone & sends katsuki a text.

me: if you dont mind, could you pick up a pregnancy test just to be sure?

izuku knows himself & his body, but he wants to be 110% sure for katsuki's sake. he doesn't want to get katsuki's hope up only to crush it later. katsuki's respond back is quick and telling.

kacchan: will three do?

kacchan: do you need anything else?

kacchan: i'll get them

izuku pauses, frowning hard as he looks down at his phone.

me: please don't text and drive

me: also, try stay below the speed limits

me: i dont want you to die before you see your child.

this time it takes longer to get a respond back.

kacchan: dont fucking talk to me about the speed laws kacchan: im not a reckless idiot

kacchan: my entire job description is to uphold the law so degenerates dont fucking run amok

kacchan: ... im not driving right now

izuku's brows furrow in thought before a smile cracks across his face.

me: kacchan... did you pull over to the side just to yell at me?

me: that's so terribly cautious and cute of you :3c

me: you're already on your way to becoming a great dad.

kacchan: FUCK YOU!!!!!!

Izuku laughs, light and so tinged with joy that it feels so strange to him to be this happy about something silly as this.

me: not a chance but thanks.

me: dont forget to buy my pregnancy test and i dont need anything else. just come here as soon as possible afterward

and he leaves it that. katsuki doesnt text him back anymore, leaving izuku to wait for his arrival with anticipation. he should get up and clean the apartment so it's presentable at least to katsuki. he hadn't had a guest in a while so this would get a good change but katsuki's warning still loop in his head. getting up to clean the apartment would constitute moving around and izuku is barely into his first trimester so, it's not like he's straining his body or anything. katsuki is just being an overbearing anxious new father.

izuku had seen that before in his past clients, who constantly fret over izuku's health but they're not THE GROUND ZERO and he has the nagging suspicious that he doesn't want to test katsuki's thinning patience with him. it's fun to tease him like this but he knows his limit. so izuku continues to sit there & waits, playing w/ his phone as he scrolls through the hero news site to check any interesting updates. izuku may have long let go of his dream but he can't disconnect from it completely. it's how he stay in the loop w/o actually being a part of it.

izuku's eyes widen as he spots a tweet on the #groundzero tag on twitter that sits atop of all others: "no jokes, guys i think i just a saw #groundzero stormed into my store and headed toward the omega’s hygiene care aisle. he bought a bunch of stuff before heading out.”

it already got a several thousands likes and retweets, with a flood of comments that ranged from "what?? sounds fake lol" or "okay, who would have guess gz would be the one to secretly keeping an omega on the side" and others are filled with more confusion and disbelief.

izuku makes a face. his contract binds him to confidentially and assurance that his identity remains quiet. he never had any problem with his identity being exposed w/ any of previous clients but then again he never had such a famous client before. this--is going to be a headache. he chews down on his lower lip in thought as he shuts down his phone. he's going to have to remind katsuki to be more careful next time lest they figure out what katsuki is up to... and who izuku is to him. not his friend, not his sweetheart, not his omega but his surrogate.

just as izuku ponders about doing damage control, there is a series of loud insistent knocks on his apartment door. izuku blinks and hurriedly to the door w/o any thought who is on the other side bc somehow he knows it got to be *him*.

he opens to door to katsuki's scowling face.

"i told you to not fucking move," katsuki scolds, and pushes his way inside w/o any invite, carefully moving izuku to the side like izuku is made of glass which make izuku annoyed right away but also painfully fond in that . he's an overprotective idiot but he's trying and that's--*something*.

 "how else would i let you in then," izuku retorts, rolling his eyes as he leads katsuki into apartment. "im only couple of weeks pregnant at most and you're already asking for miracles."

katsuki scoffs but doesn't argue as he hands izuku a full plastic bag. "okay, start peeing."

"I--" Izuku opens the bag and looks inside, staring down at the pregnancy tests stuffed to the rim of the small bag, all eleven boxes of them, "I dont have enough pee for this."

katsuki frowns. "drink a lot of water then," he suggests.

Izuku shoots him a glare. "that's not funny," he snaps.

katsuki's frowns deepen. "i'm not being funny," he says.

Izuku sighs and just digs his hand into the bag to grab a handful of the boxes. "i'll do only two so dont even." he throws the rest of the bag at katsuki and heads toward the bathroom.

it horrifyingly takes them all 30mins to be done w/ the tests bc katsuki v loudly insisted that he should do more than two, kept on banging on the bathroom door to let him know that. izuku gritted his teeth and took three more and really DID RAN OUT OF PEE AFTER THE FIFTH ONE.

the wait for the test results which only take a mins or two is ramped up by katsuki anxiously pacing back and forth in front of izuku until izuku grabs him by the sleeve of his shirt and drags him down to the sit next to him in the couch. "it'll be okay," he assures katsuki.

katsuki scowls and brushes off his touch, but he seems to breathe a little easier after that. the first three tests gives them a positive, the fourth is a negative, and the fifth is a positive. izuku frowns at the result. he knows in his heart that is w/o a doubt pregnant and the majority of the results support that but, he casts a nervous glance katsuki whose face is seemingly troubled, that's probably not enough for katsuki who spend a load of money to afford izuku's time, commitment, and body. Izuku is expensive but so is katsuki’s time and investment.

he definitely wants more than a dubious result that isn't 100% guarantee that izuku's pregnant and even if izuku tells him that he is truly pregnant bc izuku knows his own body, that may not go well either. "we can get the bloodwork done tomorrow to check for sure," izuku tries to assures him. Sometimes science speak louder than a parental instinct.

katsuki stares at him, eyes so intently focus on izuku that he feels like's a butterfly pinned under katsuki's gaze. abruptly, he reaches a hand out and grabs Izuku's own, giving it a quick and purposeful squeeze. "Move in with me," he says, sounding so grave and serious.

izuku gets up from his seat. "Do you want something to drink?" he asks, already heading toward the kitchen. "suddenly, im parched."

"did you hear what i just said?!" katsuki demands, trailing after him like a yapping puppy on his heels. "And sit the fuck down! let me get it."

abruptly, izuku stops and turns around to face katsuki with a glower on his face. "im just pregnant and not an invalid," he snaps, annoyance prickling at him. he had been doing this longer than katsuki could even imagine. "And i can get the drinks myself in my *own* home thank you." katsuki's eyes widen slightly at the sharp tone izuku had quickly adapted and heaves a sigh, carding a hand through his hair in frustration like izuku is the one being purposely difficult here. "I--fuck--" He frowns, face scrunches as he search for his next words. izuku waits it out, patient and silence against the inner turmoil that must now be swirling inside of katsuki.

katsuki's gaze drops to the floor, hands balling at his side. his breathing even out as he grimaces. "sorry," he finally settles on with a quiet mumble.

Izuku steps back in surprise. shock, really. "w--wait can repeat that again because i just thought i heard you apologized without any prompting."

katsuki flushes, ducking his head. "shut the fuck up. im not going to repeat myself," he rebukes, but the damage had been done.

Despite the years tempering his recklessness out he can't help wanting to poke the hornet's nest. "i honestly didn't think sorry was in your vocabulary, kacchan," he teases, grinning.

katsuki flinches back as though struck, surprising izuku once more. the words were said in jest, meant to ease katsuki into a laugh or close to it at least but something like pained flickers across Katsuki's face that immediately izuku wants to take it all back, but katsuki's expression had already closed up.

Izuku's heart hurt, thinking that he'd lost him. he'd pushed too hard. they're aren't friends, barely acquaintances really. just a client-employee dynamic that izuku should have been careful of. he always know where to toe the line of the boundaries of his job and with his client, but--they were doing so well that he'd hoped. been so hopeful because it had almost feels like they were sort of friends again.

izuku and katsuki had always orbit each other's world but childish pride, anger, and superiority had torn them apart and izuku was pushed out of Katsuki’s life. now that they're older, izuku is no longer that child blindingly infatuated with this remarkable person before him. he knows what he's capable of and katsuki had certainly earned his place at the top of the world but he won't be cowed either. so it's fine if katsuki doesn't want to fall back into a some kind of make shift friendship with him. it's fine if he just want to think izuku is just a walking incubator for his child. izuku will survive. He had survive this long without katsuki ‘s looming shadow after all.

katsuki hunches over as he grits his teeth. "fuck."

izuku blinks.

  "i'm not that shitty fucked up kid anymore," katsuki nearly growl out, pinning izuku with a look of full intent. "I'm," he swallows, hesitant, wary, "i'm trying to be a better person, a friend, a son, and most importantly a father now that we have a spawn coming our way."

Izuku's heart quickens at the 'we' usage even though it probably means nothing. nothing at all. katsuki was only just opening himself to him. this is something that startling new and truly welcoming experience for katsuki and izuku shouldn't mistake it for anything else. he can't be too greedy. so he steps forward, wanting to reach out and touch katsuki to affirm of his existence, but he doesn't. not when katsuki is like an exposed wire right now--twitchy, nervous, and just a little shy of imploding from carving himself open for izuku to see all his true feelings and motives.

izuku smiles.

"If i didn't think you were a good person then i wouldn't have entrusted this child,” he touches his still flat stomach, knowing life is stirring underneath his palm, "with you." katsuki truly had grown up. he'll be a good father, izuku muses but it's a bittersweet feeling. "i still want my independence though," he continues. "i've done this many times before so you can stop treating me like i'm going to break if you breath the wrong way. thousands and millions of omegas and women have been doing this a lot longer than me and they're fine. im fine, so breathe."

katsuki's presses his lip together into a grim line. "I know that," he shakes his head, "but you dont have to this alone. i'll want to be there with you every step of the way even if it mean you need someone to run to the grocery store for some shitty midnight craving. I want to be the first person you think about when you need any kind of assistance not because you're weak or helpless but because you just need someone, so let me be that person for you," he finishes, looking on in pained after spouting such sweet sentiments.

it makes izuku want to laugh, but he doesn't think that would be welcoming right now because katsuki still got his pride after all. "I'll think about it," he acquiesce, heart warming several hundred degrees as though he's standing under the direct sunlight of bakugou katsuki.

katsuki grimaces, clearly unhappy with izuku's non-answer but he relents anyway with a long heave. "ok, ok, i can deal with that," he says like the words alone was hard enough to swallow, "but if you change your mind at any moment just let fucking know!"

Oh, no, izuku thinks helplessly. he wants to give katsuki a treat for being so annoyingly overbearing but considerate in his own clumsy ways. "well, if you behave yourself, i might even consider taking you with me to my OBGYN doc this thursday," he says casually with a shrug.

Katsuki scowls, but he stands up straighter. "I'll--" he looks away, flushed with an earnest yearning spread across his face, "be good, okay?"

Izuku quietly tucks a smile between his pressed lips before it break through even though this is terrible for his weak, weak heart.

[the-twin-trollhunters]

it’s been literal ages since i’ve actively DONE anything with this blog but i really wanna get back into developing this au since i love it a lot,, even if “developing” is more just. writing scattered drabbles and snippits instead of writing through it chronologically so...

if you have questions or prompt ideas or cool thoughts about any particular era, please do let me know, i love talking about this crossover! 

the 5 eras of this crossover:

Era 1: (August 1967- June 1968) Glass Shard Beach/Quartz Shard Cove Era 2: (1968-1982) Stan in Trollmarket/Ford’s research years Era 3: (1982-2012) Wilderness Years Era 4: (2012-2016) Summer 2012 and beyond Era 5: (Spring 2016~) The new trollhunters

(a ton more rando ideas under the cut)

Era 1: (August 1967- June 1968) Glass Shard Beach/Quartz Shard Cove

Big ideas: -Stan finds amulet, discovers underground civilization of trolls alongside Ford -Helps protect Quartz Shard Cove, the troll city below them, over the course of senior year -Major foes are Korsiva (a disgraced ex-general of Gunmar who’s been in hibernation for years) and an east coast branch of the Janus Order -Stan and Ford’s baby nephew (son of their big brother Shermie), Alexander, gets swapped out for a changeling. Chaos ensues. -Carla- Stan’s best friend- is brought into the fold/fights alongside the twins. -That time they recovered a single piece of the Killahead that was unguarded- they learn the changelings are trying to rebuilt it early in this AU. The piece is stowed away for safekeeping in Trollmarket, deep in the catacombs.  -Over time there’s found family themes with Alex the changeling, and he ends up defecting from the Janus Order entirely.. after experiencing all the horror of the Darklands, he just wants the chance to live a good and honest life. Through ancient magic, he finds a way to wipe the evidence of his existence from the Order. -Blinky and Aaarrrgghh pretty much slam adopt on all of these humans. -Stan and Ford’s relationship becomes more and more strained as the year goes on because Stan keeps pushing him away (thinking he’s protecting him by doing so)

Era 2: (1968-1982) Stan in Trollmarket/Ford’s research years

Big ideas: -After Stan is kicked out, he moves with Blinky and Aaarrrgghh back to Trollmarket. -Ford, to college. -Stan becomes really close with Draal during this time. -A lot of Stan’s work during this time is working to maintain peace in the troll world with the continuing threat of Killahead bridge being knowingly rebuilt, and trying to figure out WHERE the bridge pieces are being stored. (Currently it’s being hidden in a place far away from Arcadia.) -Ford still goes to Gravity Falls to research the strange and bizzare, and the Bill Cipher stuff still happens, except in this AU the Nightmare Realm and the Darklands are the same place, just this interdimensional dumping ground that Bill and Gunmar are both trapped within. They’re pretty much both competing to see who can get out first.  -Stan sent to go investigate the going-ons in Gravity Falls bc the trolls sensed an open portal to the Darklands there. He’s pissed and confused to realize it was his brother’s doing. -Ford gets sucked through the portal, along with Stan’s amulet.

Era 3: (1982-2012) Wilderness Years

Big ideas:  -The troll Tribunal forbids Stan from setting foot in any troll settlement in punishment for losing the amulet to Gunmar’s clutches. They’re essentially without a trollhunter for these 30 years. -Stan realizes the truth about Ford, that he was manipulated by an ancient eldritch being. Now feeling insanely guilty for leaving him to the whims of something like that, he begins to rebuild the thrashed portal. It may be ultimate treason to the trollkind he once swore to protect, but his family is forever more important to him than law. -Ford, meanwhile, discovers a shocking fact- the amulet calls his name too, and he can wield the armor and Daylight as well. He travels the multiverse for 30 years, learning more about the amulet and what it means to be a trollhunter along the way... crossing into dimensions where other trollhunters exist, gathering stones to use in it, gaining proficiency at fighting... -Alex- or as he comes to call himself, Lex- grows up, moves to California, falls in love with a human woman, and to his great surprise they’re able to have kids- twins. As far as he knows at that point, they’re essentially fully human- but they all know about his changeling nature. -They raise their kids in Arcadia. Occasionally, Lex does reconnaissance work for the trolls- Blinky and Vendel specifically.

Era 4: (2012-2016) Summer 2012 and beyond

Big ideas: -Lex sends his kids to GF for the summer for Stan to watch, paranoid that the Janus Order discovered what he did to their records and found him again  -Much of the summer is spent trying to uncover their Grunkle’s hidden past (he’s kept all the trollhunting stuff on the down low from family as a result of his disgrace from troll society. only lex knows the full story.) and what’s up with this mysterious journal in the woods. -The journal is p much the same except it has a toooon of troll stuff in it too. Ford’s a nerd. -Wendy is a changeling. Originally she was stationed in Gravity Falls to keep an eye on Stan and make sure he’s not up to no good, but she’s never actually gotten the chance to sneak into his basement to see what he’s working on. His security is too top-notch. When she’s finally a teen in human years she gets a job in the shack so she can get closer to him.  -Honestly I think she also flips. Just, all the changelings eventually flip when they see how great found family and friendships and anything that’s not Gunmar is, okay? XDD -Fiddleford isn’t actually entirely insane- but he’s still not all mentally there. Long story. He lives with his son and actually wears clothes most of the time. -Yknow I’m pretty sure Dipper and Mabel prob catch Wendy shifting between forms and that’s how they esp bond -Also let’s be real the two of them definitely end up exploring the troll civilization under Gravity Falls -the Wham moment where Ford walks out of the portal wearing the Armor of Daylight and everyone’s like :O OOO two trollhunters!!! ! -Weirdmageddon’s weirdness wave activates long dormant changeling genes for Dipper and Mabel, and they shift into troll forms. They’re a unique case of changeling because they are their own familiars. -Post 2012, the full story of what happened with the amulet becomes known to trollkind, and Stan’s ban from underground is lifted. He and Ford together continue trollhunting business, and they’re still a force to be reckoned with, even with their age. -In early 2016, the amulet leaves Stan and Ford, and stops responding to them both. The assumption made is that it senses the two of them are unable to carry out their duty anymore at their age, and has made the choice to move on. (normally a trollhunter just... would die long before they grew old enough for this to be a problem, so...)

Era 5: (Spring 2016~) The new trollhunters

-Dipper and Mabel are both 18, in senior year. They are fully able to shift between forms at whim by now. -Amulet picks Jim. A lot of broad canon strokes remain the same, but the trolls already are aware of the changelings still existing, and of the Killahead bridge’s threat- and have made the appropriate precautions. Tbh I still need to develop more logical divergences this new canon would make in what happens. -But I do know for sure that the changelings have to infiltrate Trollmarket to steal the stone Stan retrieved LOOONG ago in 1968 to even open the Killahead bridge at all.   -And I think Bular’s been out and about for some time trying to sniff out where this piece was being kept. His hunt has only recently brought him back to Arcadia. -Dipper and Mabel accidentally out themselves to Bular during the equivalent of the ep Young Atlas as they try to rescue Jim. This also outs the fact that ONE of their parents must be a changeling to the Janus Order.  -There is a Kidnapping that occurs,,, as Strickler is trying to pry info on where the last piece is from Lex, using Dip and Mab as collateral. Strickler gets the info he wants, sigh. -Through the battle of Killahead that eventually ensues, both Nomura AND Lex are sucked through into the Darklands. Not only does everyone want to rescue Claire’s baby brother, but they want to rescue Lex too. (There’s also some interesting ethics on whether or not they should rescue the REAL baby Alexander Pines afforded the opportunity, too. I’m still not sure if they do or not.) -When Jim goes into the Darklands, Stan and Ford return from their sailing expedition to keep the peace as best they can in Trollmarket/Arcadia. Sans amulet, of course, bc it won’t respond to them anymore but.. it’s something. -They’re there for the remainder of “S2-3.” -Ford ends up trying to defend Jim at the tribunal, but despite his eloquence still fails to convince them of anything. -When the Merlin quest happens, Dipper and Mabel are there as well. They can’t shift forms because of the magic ban, but their addition is enough to help fight off/kill Angor Rot and save Draal. -Ford knows from his journeys through the multiverse what Merlin aims to do (he’s met a future half-troll version of Jim, he Suspects) and is Against It. They fight alone at one point. -Battle stuff... Except the battle goes Fucking Wrong because of some key elements (no Angor Rot to blindside Morgana) and it ends up with the eternal night becoming permanent and some hellish frickin stuff, Morgana murders Merlin, she reconstitutes the shattered fragments of Bill Cipher within Stan’s mind (those two have History and that’s literally a whole nother Story please do ask me about it) and whisks him away in seconds to GF to go break Bill’s full essence free from his stone prison because she wants to p much steal his power for herself. -Ford found a sort of special amulet stone whilst in the multiverse that he’s been keeping all this time in case of emergencies... it allows the bearer to jump backwards in time, but only once. Only thing is, it’s also. in Gravity Falls. Kept safe in Fiddleford’s mansion. -Claire jumps them to GF via shadow staff. -Jim gets the stone and is able to use it like, just before they pretty much all die. He jumps back to RIGHT when Merlin wakes up in the tomb. -He realizes that the only real way he can stop all of this from going to hell completely is by making sure that all the shards of Bill in Stan’s mind are well and truly destroyed forever... and so they do just that. It’s a big dramatic mind demon eternal exorcism, a family/friends effort.

-there’s probably more but I’ve literally been rambling on like a noob. that’s pretty much the highlights. please do ask me questions about events/character relationships/places/timeline stuff/etc etc etc i would love to see them!

[harry-niclach]

Crowns Part 5

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Title: Crowns

Pairings/Characters: Romantic Analogical (Logan and Virgil) and Platonic/Familial Royality (Roman and Patton) and some oc and side characters that are implied to be in love!

AU: Fantasy/Medieval based

Summary: Virgil has always been alone. He didn’t believe that there was a place for him out there. So when his Mother left him a quick to turn Father he seemed more alone than ever. Now, however, someone is trying to help him, what can their reasoning be?

And more importantly, can Virgil stop himself from being too gay and falling for him?

Warnings: Panic, Panic attack, Minor Character Death, Illness, Cuts from falling, Swearing, blood, weapons, sword fighting/knife fighting, chase scene or two, Shouting I guess (No caps lock) let me know if you see more

This chapter is slightly longer! I hope you enjoy!! <3

The rest of Constance’s shift with Patton passed along without a hitch.

-^-

The sun was setting creating beautiful oranges and purples with a splash of pink and a dash or red. Patton loved looking at the sky, he loved to observe things in great detail he just wasn’t very good at putting his observations into words. Not one bit.

Constance and Patton were walking down the long hallway that lead to the big wooden entrance doors where they would walk around the gardens for a couple hours as Constance taught him about the different flowers and Patton listened intently locking the information away for some other time.

They continued around every so often Patton would ask a question about the fountains or the staff or the beautiful flowers. Patton’s favorite was the purple hydrangeas and the purple lisianthus.’

They turned the corner near the fountains to see the regal, prince Roman standing there his hair perfect and his outfit pressed perfectly as his crown sat perfectly somehow not slipping,

“Who is this?!” He seemed angry but Patton could already tell that the anger hadn’t been aimed at him directly. Something bad must have happened.

It was the look in his eyes.

The deep-set sadness and longtime grief that he was still going through, that was still plaguing him and his distaste at Patton had sounded as if it came out of a protective instinct to keep Patton safe from his own anger they seemed about the same age though so it troubled Patton that someone around the same age had been so much trouble but then he remembered that he hadn't exactly come from the picture-perfect setting either.

“Your Majesty Prince Roman, this is Patton he was accompanying me for a walk,” Constance fell into a deep bow as she began to speak her armor making a slight noise as she did so,

“I do not care for the reason he is here just the knowledge that he shouldn’t!” Prince Roman was getting more worked up by the second,

“Don’t get mad at Miss Constance!” Patton spoke up, not meaning to be so loud, he wasn’t going to let the prince get mad at Miss Constance for being his friend!

“How dare you talk to me like that?!” Roman couldn’t help but shout he wasn’t mad he was just so, so tired of being sad that he couldn’t allow this person to be here surely Roman would end up hurting soon,

“I speaked to you that way ‘cause you was hurtin’ Miss Constance with your nasty words!” Roman had had enough, he pushed Patton back but the boy didn’t move to make a move in retaliation he looked down at his feet then back up at Prince Roman,

And smiled.

Roman couldn’t continue his facade, tears brimmed in his eyes and all he could think of was his Mother and how alike her and this-this boy were. He held his tears back though until the boy opened his arms for a hug, a warm smile plastered on his face instead of a scowl or a look of hurt.

“L-look I’m-I’m sorry I-I snapped espe-especially on you,” Roman said between sobs and gasps of air, Patton just held him closer an rubbed circles on his back soothingly. Patton wasn’t much smaller than Prince Roman but he was a little shorter but not short enough to have it cause a problem. Patton lowered himself and Roman to the ground gently taking extra care as not to scare or hurt the prince.

They sat on the gravel paths for what seemed forever but Patton could tell immediately that he now had a new friend one that would hopefully stand alongside him for a while.

-^-

Virgil awoke to a light tap on his shoulder which was more than enough to wake him.

“Good morning Virgil, did you sleep well?” Logan wasn’t looking at him as they were still on the horse but the Northern Kingdom was on the horizon so it made sense to be awake now.

Virgil rubbed his eyes lazily,

“Y-yeah…” His voice was rough and hoarse from having just woken up but he cleared his throat and tried again,

“Yeah,” He managed to stop his stutter this time (It had been plaguing him for years now) and looked on as the North Kingdom grew closer, having no clue what the kingdom was actually called he decided to ask,

“I know it-it’s kind of a du-dumb question but what-t is the King-Kingdom called?” His voice was small but Logan could still hear him as clear as day,

“It’s not stupid at all Virgil, the Kingdom goes by the name of Aluasoul,” Logan’s voice was still as calm as it had been the day prior.

-

Logan rode through the streets of Aluasoul with care but with efficiency. He avoided people with his horse as they drew nearer to the castle armed guards came into view, well at least the looked armed?

The fo9ur guards standing at the gate bowed deeply to Logan but he just sighed and shook his head climbing off the horse then helping Virgil down.

“I told you for the last time that there is no need to bow like that, I am not more important than any of you,” They all rose and smiled fondly at Logan their eyes all said that this wasn’t the first time this had happened. Virgil lifted his sleeve covered hand to his mouth to hide his smirk. Logan didn’t seem to mind which was a surprise as most people did.

They walked through the simple yet still somehow grand gates and into the Castle grounds where there were rows upon rows of different flowers that Virgil recognized as blue-tinted statice and white gardenias and dendrobium. He smiled at the sight, it made him relax a little, it was something familiar.

He hadn’t seen something familiar in a while.

He continued to follow Logan down the paved grey path. He heard children laughing and looked around as he walked taking in everything and then his eyes swept over a group of about three children huddled together all watching him. His raggy clothes and the small bag Logan had given him to carry his disgusting crown in so he wouldn’t have to see it.

One of the kids was pushed forward by the group of others after Logan had walked past. She slowly waddled towards Virgil on seemingly unsteady feet. Logan had stopped in the front and had turned to watch the exchange while Virgil had stopped dead and turned to face the child.

“H-Hello, I’m Amicia Howard, who are you?” The little girls swayed on her feet nervous wringing her hands together. Virgil became less nervous by the second as he crouched down to her height he smiled softly,

“H-Hi, I’m Vir-Virgil,” His voice was soft but his stutter was still very prominent and Amicia didn't seem to mind.

“Why are you here?” Amicia had gained some confidence as her nervous stutter had disappeared,

“S-Sir Logan found-found me and-and res-rescued me,” He didn’t even try to stop the stutter this time instead he punched his chest afterward out of frustration and the knowledge that sometimes that helped with the stutter. At this point, Logan walked back up to them with a soft expression,

“Salutations, Amicia, I see you’ve met Virgil but Virgil and I have to go now we have important things to do, maybe he can play later?” There was no malice in his voice just kindness,

“Okay!” Amicia seemed satisfied so with that Logan began to walk again, Virgil following close behind as to not get lost in the hallways where many people bustled about carrying trays or swords or parchment and some people weren’t carrying anything and were running in different directions.

“Try not to get lost,” He heard Logan speak up from in front of him but Virgil had no intentions of getting lost. He continued to follow Logan through the hallways the bag hanging at his side.

They walked and walked and walked, by this point Virgil wasn’t sure where they were going but they had been into many rooms and they all were very impressive, Logan having to speak to a few people but then having to leave again, Virgil stood behind him not listening to the conversations because it was rude to eavesdrop.

They were walking down what Logan claimed to be one of the last hallways but it was still very crowded nonetheless. A group of guards walked down the hall, Virgil a little behind Logan one of the guards pointed at him and laughed then whispered an laughed again, Virgil was used to it but still wary, as always.

The guards walked past one of them slowing down just enough to catch Virgil’s bag, they pulled it right off his shoulder even though he was holding it quite tightly, they began to rummage through it only finding the crown they threw it to the floor and drew their swords and pointed them at Virgil,

“Your Majesty he is of the west kind! Why is he here?!” The guard who had taken his sword spoke with a such a tone of distaste in his mouth that it left a bitter taste in Virgil’s mouth, he looked towards Logan for help and saw the undeniable rage flash in his eyes,

“Put your swords away and stand down! I am plenty capable. Why do you think I let him in here? Do think of me as some idiot? Get out of my sight, you have been relieved from your duties until I see fit,” Logan finished sharply as the guards trailed out if his sight feeling small with their swords sheathed and their faces downcast.

-^-^-^-^-^--

Logan Snapped!

I appreciate any comments, criticism, feedback anything even if you’re just telling me I spelled a word wrong I don’t mind and I’m open to any sort of feedback, thanks for reading :) <3

I’ll put the tags on the new chapters and then they’ll also be on the taglist? I don’t know what I’m doing :)

if you want to be tagged let me know!

@jadekitten1 @super-magical-wizard @impossiblebluebirdcreation @fury-of-rome

[be21zh]

Jun 13, 2018

these 2 dawns both dreamed of enemies and my revenge. yesterday on my jog route, the old sinister, an elder man, a mad cow, again challenged me physically, took a narrow way in advance me. he copied my route twice, always bragged his mule energetic and orthodox. It really disgusting me but I trusted God the killing upon profane, anytime anywhere. it took me longer to roam when I caught sight of my mission on the earth progresses so step by step and devising broken. God dad, enemies took our road to sabotage our beautiful world's descending. near my dorm, the neighbor room of my dorm, is a half size room previously for cleaner keeping tools, now occupied by dorm administrative staff, a likely lesbian. dorm authority previously never put woman among mans' area, but the cheap cow insisted lodging among all man dorms, just for steal and spying me. day by day it hided herself in the shabby shelter to surveillance me, to profane me. likely she arranged that to take advantage of public asset for private interest, or the SOE under PRC tyrant's direction to threaten me with the trick. as to larger aspect, these 2 weeks quite satisfying: dorm internet access upgrade to chinaunicom fiber optics, whose download speed stable at 2MB/s. upload speed almost the same. I completed downloading OSes on our raspberry pi within 2 hours for 2 or 4 system images. with the utility, I can safely try more Linux distributive and more prepared for Linux world which so attractive comparing Microsoft under PRC blackmail. now my son and my raspberry pi both equipped with more elegant OSes, ready to go further and higher on the ward free informative universe. the ISP in the pass week gradually picked up to surveillance me. it already blocked me 2 days last week, forced me surfing domestic sites includes its homepage, where I found cheap but gracious mobile phone number with modest data plan, 15 CNY/mon. I had already persuaded by its sms to have a free of charge deputy phone number, but later contact refuted me saying the data plan includes deputy card requires at lease 128CNY/mon consuming. but on the website, I saw an independent phone number only costs 30CNY, so I immediately ordered one, in rhythm of rain in an aimless night besieged by deadly blockage from open web. It's so meaningful and rewarding, that I can't wait to add the new asset to all my zhone GA contacts. Monday express informed me the arrival of the sim card and I fetched immediately, even the staff of the unicom missing and handled over her colleague. Sunday I busy with trying enable other 2 GA chrome device management within google admin panel before woz returning from his painting class his mom arranged years. even failed due to google policy, we glad the 2 GA didn't bundled with central administrative which usually bans full google play store access, as status quo. my son uncertain about my blame last Monday upon his adopting a corrective glasses his mom suggested in favor of Chinese so said innovation, but never trustworthy. he tried to flattered me by turning on English podcast proactive as I frequently urged while he always loosed to abid. but I don't care, and glad to reunite him in the fruitful weekend. his internet ISP once boasted speed of 30MB but never satisfying, rather just lagging and broken frequently, likely in PRC surveillance's ordain. I even can't update his Linux smoothly there. each time when I visit my son and launch update, it's bottle neck and upset our patience. God laughs the dirty trick and burning brains wasted among all ghosted communism China wholely in ash. God dad, I'm so contented by my new internet that I here end this post soon. grant my son satisfying web and rich content of play. grant us ward free web, for otherwise I see only darkness of dictator propaganda, coarse of manipulation of social consciousness. bring me sooner my Royal China, my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko. bring me closer my dream land and peace of God's mercy upon Chinese and China, my vested land from my glorious ancestor. thx for this sunny morning, Dad God.

May 29, 2018

dreamed with my son roamed in remote place near Tianjin, northern China, my university city. I carried my passed mother's corpse and search for service to bury it. we were refuted once for too expensive. then near country fair we met Gao Jun, my once alumnus who soon after army train in beginning of PRC campus migrated from our major Philosophy school into Economics, but stayed in dorm of our class girls. her husband or brother inquired our problem and extended his help, out of Chinese taboo, while Miss Gao remained her self-possessed normally among guests in her spacious house in my dream. we likely rested there and waited for more money remit from our relatives, or aided by Gao to settle our funeral. the northern China countryside scene lonely detailed in dream, different from my hometown, central China. last night it drizzled, left wet ground when I went to dorm canteen for breakfast. last night I put 2 pillows in stack and its the highest pillow I ever had with my own, for the cover of my pillar sent to laundry and no replacement. I always admire American family pillars in its episodes, large and soft and qualifies, but never found within domestic market includes online e-commerce. yesterday I half day roaming in dorm, except reading informative web as routine for one or 2 hours. my life more and more turned like an elder's, or even worse, like those retired gathered in gate ball game yard outside near my dorm window view. they found no fun in the game, no challenge, no exciting, but just gather and moving. still there are fights among common Chinese, like the dorm canteen. the operational couples loathed to invest more on food materials, but spare no efforts to advertise, to celebrate its anniversary. the result is fewer and fewer customers. I usually have less than a bowl meat in a week there together. it doesn't hurt me much as a mandated vegetarian, but let me slender. and the business possibly reined by PRC surveillance against me. recent months my throat more and more choked by phlegm, I had to cough hard to spit it. my backbone also turned inflexible: after standing up it takes quite few seconds to waist straight from sitting. usually the most exciting moment in a week is gathering my son, woz, on Sunday weekly. his sinful mom tentative separates us, frequently change my son's timetable to drive my son away from my side. God dad, the drizzle turns heavier. dad God, my life runs full and merry. no matter how sinister attempted to ruin it. grant us our web business booming and self-relies. bring us sooner Royal China for better future. bring me my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for my second baby, billing zhu. God dad last salary means so much for us. my worn shoes, which embarrassed me again last raining Sunday when it was wet being handled to spa keeper, now replaced by new one. my son glad with his new chromebook bag he chose his own. God dad, in coming alipay credit returning day, let us anxious free. thx God dad, for surfing hard time so smooth regardless PRC war time preparing period, thx for skipping us from trifle grudge in the failing and doomed authority.

May 26, 2018

this month my salary from QRRS exceptionally supportive: nearly 600 additional totals ￥3600, and my younger brother gifted me ￥200 for update my wrecked shoes. with it, I bought my son, woz birthday cake a dearest one, ￥128 fruits cake titled 和风莓语. we designated praying for Japanese spiritual and English.the cake shop near my dorm and kindly offered us a set of stainless steer cake knife and forks. my son lately returned from his school, near 7 pm, for his school forced even grade 7th students to have night class aiming better performance in rat race entrance exam of elite senior middle school. his mom this time actively joined us in celebration. woz, and all us likely enjoyed the delicacy, fruit cake. after first round of eating cake, my son lent himself to my planned task abrupt, setup his new account in google chrome for easy access family asset book. that lasted more than an hour and wonderfully done. I then left, urging my son listening and watching more English as cliche. on bus station, the last bus line missed. I walked 2 bus stops to return my dorm, and busy with publishing video and photo captured in the ritual birthday onto web till 11 am. in this deep sleep I dreamed 2 kind of different animals, 獾 badger and a kind of Chinese sound like "揉", both like sloth or pangolin. the training and performance of district summer sports game Qiqihar municipal requisites on going now again, near 8 am and loudly outside. I saw in these days how the expropriation costs, esp young lives, their decency and creativeness in change of collective cheap mob. dad, my son's class was lucky out of the chaos. guide us away from burning turbulence of PRC war time preparation. grant us our job meaningful and rewarding material and spiritual. in this windy morning, dad God, let the world witness how plenty our joys, perfections in our living spectrum.