#entertaining i liked it but you know not over the top

[dollishsz]

HOW DIFFERENT BATBOYS APOLOGIZE AFTER A ARGUMENT ── .✦

a/n: Lowkey I feel like I’m like slightest but problematic in arguments (not me exposing myself) but srs I got this request by a anon! (Here) So yeah tysmm, I won’t be writing the argument because lowkey, I can’t do angst at this time 💔😞

(Tags: how different batboys apologize after a argument)

BRUCE WAYNE ── .✦

The "I'm Sorry, But…" Apology: Bruce’s apology might be a little stiff at first. He’s not great with words when it comes to his emotions, but he does know how to make up for things. His apology might start with something like, "I know I’m… difficult, but I didn’t mean to hurt you." The real comedy comes in when he tries to "fix" the situation by throwing money at it—like suggesting an extravagant dinner or buying you a new wardrobe because, "I know it will make you feel better."

Trying Too Hard to Be ‘Normal’: He might try to act like he’s “not Bruce Wayne” for a second, attempting to be goofy to show you he’s truly sorry. Picture Bruce awkwardly trying to make a joke: "I’m sorry I made you feel like I was ignoring you. How about we go out… without my bodyguards this time? You know, like a normal date?"

The Silent Apology: More often than not, Bruce will show you he’s sorry with actions, like preparing your favorite meal or doing something thoughtful (such as leaving you a handwritten note or taking care of something you've been stressing about). But if you press him for words, he might simply mutter, “I’m not good at this… but I am sorry,” and leave it at that.

DICK GRAYSON ── .✦

The Full-On “I’m Sorry, Please Forgive Me” Routine: Dick is extremely sorry whenever he’s messed up, and he knows how to make it entertaining. He’ll show up with flowers, chocolates, or maybe even your favorite ice cream. And then, with a totally sincere but dramatic flair, he’ll say something like, “Listen, I know I was an idiot, and I have no excuse except that I’m clearly emotionally stupid when I’m upset. So please, for the love of all things holy, let me make it up to you.”

Humorous Apologies: Dick might also make you laugh with his over-the-top apologies. Maybe he tries to outdo himself by setting up an elaborate “romantic” date, only for it to completely go awry (think spaghetti noodles flying everywhere or a very unromantic “romantic” location). He’ll laugh it off, saying, “Okay, so maybe that’s not exactly how I imagined it… but you have to admit, it’s unforgettable.”

The Super Dramatic ‘I’m Sorry’ Speech: After an argument, Dick is not shy about admitting when he’s wrong. He’ll deliver a heartfelt, exaggerated apology, something like, "I was a fool, and I see now that I was wrong. You are perfect, and I am definitely not. How do you put up with me?" Then, he might give you puppy-dog eyes, as if expecting you to immediately forgive him.

JASON TODD ── .✦

The “I Know I Messed Up, But… Here’s a Gift” Approach: Jason is quick to apologize, but it’s not usually with a heartfelt speech. Instead, he’ll show up with a gift—maybe something small but thoughtful, like your favorite snack or a new book he knows you’ve been eyeing. He’ll casually hand it to you and say, “Alright, alright, I messed up. But you know I’m not great at this, so here’s my attempt at being a decent human being.”

Comedic Self-Deprecation: Jason, knowing he’s not always the best communicator, might start with a little self-deprecating humor. "Look, I’m sorry, okay? You’re right, I am a jerk sometimes. But hey, at least I didn’t set anything on fire this time, right?" He’ll try to make you laugh with his inability to fully express himself, but you know he means it.

The “I’m Sorry, Now Let’s Get Back to Normal” Routine: Jason might awkwardly try to move past the argument, brushing it off with a gruff, "Look, I’m sorry for being a pain. Can we just… go back to how things were?" It's not the most eloquent apology, but it’s Jason, and it’s his way of saying he wants to make things right without diving too deep into feelings.

TIM DRAKE ── .✦

The "I Overthought This" Apology: Tim is a perfectionist, so when he messes up, he’ll overthink how to apologize. He’ll probably try to do something really thoughtful, like writing you a letter or planning a whole day dedicated to making it up to you. But the real comedy comes when he gets so wrapped up in planning that he’s awkward about it. "I, uh, made you a list of everything I could do to make it up to you, starting with… well, taking you out for dinner. You like sushi, right? But if you prefer something else, I can also—"

The "What Do You Need?" Routine: Tim might also take a very logical approach. He’ll ask, "What would you like me to do to fix this?" but in a way that makes it seem like he’s creating a spreadsheet of ways to apologize. "I’ve compiled some options for you to choose from. Option one: Dinner. Option two: A walk in the park. Option three: Let me do your laundry for the next week…”

The 'Nervous, Over-Apologetic' Tim: Tim is likely to be the one who apologizes over and over again. He’ll say “I’m sorry” about a dozen times in a single conversation, with increasing levels of anxiety. "I really didn’t mean it that way. I’m so sorry. Are we okay? You don’t seem mad, but if you are, I understand, and I’m really, really sorry."

DAMIAN WAYNE ── .✦

The Reluctant Apology: Damian isn’t one to apologize easily, and when he does, it’s more formal. He might say something like, “I apologize for my behavior. It was uncalled for.” And then he’ll awkwardly pause, before adding, "I... didn’t mean to upset you." The comedic part comes when he clearly doesn’t understand how he’s hurt you. He might ask, “Is there anything I can do to make it right? Or… was this just another one of your moods?”

The Unintentional "Nice Guy" Apology: Damian will give you something as an apology—perhaps a bouquet of flowers or something that he “found interesting,” but he’ll likely be very stiff about it, saying something like, “This is for you. I thought you would appreciate it. It’s… an apology gift.” He’ll be surprised when you react positively, since he’s convinced that you’ll just think it’s lame

A Small Gesture of Remorse: As an apology, Damian might ask you to join him for a quiet walk or for tea, giving you a rare moment of sincerity. He might even throw in a joke (but it’ll be one of those very dry ones), saying, “The tea will be of the highest quality, so I suppose that should count for something."

[julymusings]

Jason is the type of person to put on some shitty romance movie only for his date to fall asleep and for him to get strangely invested.

are you still watching?

i saddle up my horse and I ride into the city. i make a lot of noise 'cause the girls they are so pretty. riding up and down broadway on my old stud leroy, and the girls say...

or; 3 times Jason Todd gets hooked on your television choices [3.7k]

jason todd x fem!reader; this is so real...and so clever!!! i LOVE the concept. i did get a little carried away and lost the plot unforch...pt3 is just a sex dream ab cowboy!jason so. also I apologize for taking forever to respond. tw...klance mentioned💀 & suggestive but not explicit. and i do bash on voltron in pt2 a little but it's all in good fun🫶i did my time with them divider

i.

“Baby, I love you, but if you don’t pick something soon I’ll call Dick in here to entertain us with his backflips.”

“Oh, be quiet,” you huff. Though as you scroll, once again, through all the options on Netflix, you fear his threat may be serious.

You reach the bottom of the page, having found nothing. You peek at Jason from the corner of your eye and hover the cursor over the ‘Back to Top’ button.

“No.” He reaches to grab the laptop from you, but his injuries hinder his usual swiftness. You shriek in objection and roll away to the other side of the bed, computer held tight in your clutches.

“Babe.” He groans. He tries to reach across the bed to you, but his grasp falls short by mere centimeters as you frantically begin another scan of the site.

“I will find something, I promise!” You say. “Just one more minute!”

He rolls his eyes. “You said that ten minutes ago. And I’m the one who’s injured, shouldn’t I get to pick?”

You spare him a glance, pondering over his wrapped foot elevated on a pillow, and the bandages around his torso. His arm has fallen flat on his bed, having given up on its attempt to catch you. That alone should guilt you into saying yes; his childhood bed is just shy of too small for his adult self, so being unable to reach the other end speaks to the severity of his pain. And to add salt to the wound, you know he isn’t exactly fond of staying at his father’s house, but he is in no shape to recuperate alone.

“I would say yes, but you don’t know any good shows! All you watch is Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives.”

He scoffs. “I thought you liked that show!”

You scoff back, imitating him. “I did. But a person can only stand so much of Guy Fieri talking with his mouth full.”

He quiets, probably searching for a rebuttal, but you can’t imagine he’ll find any. You use the opportunity to resume your search unimpeded. 

After a few minutes, you perk up. “Ooh, they added New Girl on Netflix!” You scoot back over on the bed to his side, satisfied with your choice.

“What is that?” Jason asks.

You whip your head to him. “You don’t know New Girl?”

He pushes a stray hair behind your ear, eyes narrowed. “Should I?”

Your eyes flit to the computer screen, then back to him, and you sigh. “No, I guess not.”

You’re about to press play on the first episode but stop yourself. “Do you want to choose? You’re already hurting enough, I don’t want to torture you with this too. Besides, I’ve seen it, like, a million times anyway.”

“No, it’s okay.” He turns the computer towards him and presses play. “I don’t need any of my siblings barging in and catching me enjoying Guy Fieri. I’d never hear the end of it.”

You titter at his remark and set your laptop in the middle of you, a little farther away so you don’t have to crane your neck to see the screen. He lifts his arm to drape it around you but struggles with raising it past shoulder level. You meet him halfway by ducking underneath his arm and settling it over your shoulders. He kisses the top of your head in thanks.

Leaning against his chest, the rise and fall of his breathing is too hypnotic for you to focus. Paired with the warmth of his skin, bare so as not to obstruct access to his wound dressings, you are quickly lulled to sleep.

It must be several hours later when movement against you disturbs you from sleep. The room is almost pitch black, save for the dim glow of the computer, still on and resting on your legs a few feet away. The air is thick with late-night silence, and fighting against the heaviness of your eyelids is so laborious that you have to use your hand to pry them open. Jason is squirming next to you, hand outstretched, low huffs of pain slipping from his mouth.

A shot of adrenaline courses through you and you stumble into action.

“What happened? What hurts?” The laptop tips off your legs and falls to the bed, landing on its side as you scramble to your knees and face him. “Should I get someone?”

“What? No, I— I’m fine, why?” He squints at you through the darkness.

“You—” Your throat catches and you take a deep, steadying breath. “It sounded like you were in pain.”

“No, honey, I’m fine. It’s okay. You can go back to sleep.” Jason takes your wrist and gently pulls you back into his side. You don’t budge.

“Then why were you moving?” You scan him for any signs of a worsening injury. Downplaying his own pain is not something you can put past him, unfortunately.

“I…” His eyes look past you for a quick second. He swallows. “I wasn’t,” he says, unconvincingly.

You narrow your eyes at him, then turn around to see what he is looking at, despite his (false) reassurances. Your laptop, still on its side, lies awake and open to the Netflix website. You pick it up to get a closer look at the screen. The player has gone dark, and overcast in white lettering; ‘New Girl: Are you still watching?’

You turn back to Jason, dumbfounded. “You risked hurting yourself…for this?”

Now adjusted to the darkness, you can see his cheeks tinged with pink. “No?”

“Jason.”

“You’re the one who put it on!”

You check the clock in the corner of the screen.

“It’s three AM, Jay. You need to sleep if you want your body to heal.” You argue.

“It wasn’t on purpose!” He defends. “I can’t sleep sitting up, and I need help lying down.” he fails to meet your eyes as he says this.

You cross your arms, tilting your face to catch his gaze. “And what am I doing here?”

“I didn’t want to wake you up,” he mumbles.

You just stare. It takes fifteen seconds for him to break.

“Fine. I was enjoying the show. I wanted to keep watching. Happy?” He punctuates his statement with a shrug but groans through a clenched jaw, remembering the injuries to his upper body.

“Okay, just—” You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose between your fingers. “It’s too late for this. Can we please go to sleep?” You don’t wait for an answer, shutting the laptop and placing it on the bedside table.

He leans off the headboard so you can help him shift his body down the bed and lie flat, and you lie down next to him.

“Comfy?” You ask.

“Yes.”

“Need anything?”

“No.”

“Okay. Goodnight,” you whisper. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Jason says quietly.

You snuggle into his side. It’s quiet for a few minutes, but you can tell by his breathing pattern that he’s still awake. He whispers your name into the darkness, hoping you’re still awake.

“Yes, honey?” You answer.

There is a beat of silence. Then, “When do Nick and Jess get together?”

“Go to sleep.”

ii.

Jason leans against the kitchen counter behind him, hands in his pockets, as he watches the microwave dish spin in a slow circle. It whirs under the yellow lightbulb, the flat paper packet puffing up among raucous popping. With sixty seconds left to kill, he searches the cabinets for a large enough bowl to fit the family-size packet of popcorn, as well as the various add-ons you adore.

The first time you invited Jason over for a movie night, in the beginning stages of your relationship, he looked on in wonder as you combined the grocery store’s entire snack aisle into one salty, sugary, buttery abomination in a jumbo Hello Kitty bowl.

“How do you even come up with something like this?” He had asked, ripping open the bag of pretzels as you emptied the fresh batch of popcorn into the bowl.

“Wait!” You stopped him just before he could pour the pretzels in. “Sugary stuff first. While it’s still hot. Then it gets all melty and good.” You dumped an entire bag of mini marshmallows, caramels, and M&M’s in, and gave it a few stirs. “And to answer your question, I was in high school and experiencing intense munchies.”

You gave him the OK to add the pretzels, so he did. “I envy your dentist,” he said, and you stuck your tongue out at him.

Now, with plenty more movie nights under his belt, you trusted him enough to assemble your party mix on his own while you select something to watch.

The microwave beeps. As he rips open the popcorn bag, you yell from the living room.

“Hey, what about The Bourne Identity?” You call out. “Have you—? Wait.” You cut yourself off.

“What’s it about?” He yells back. You don’t answer. “Babe?” He calls again.

“Never mind! I’m gonna keep looking!”

He adds the sugary snacks first, stirring them until they melt, just how you like it. He’s tearing into the bag of pretzels when he hears you shriek.

He drops the bag and bolts to the living room, pretzels scattering all over the counter and floor.

“What happened?” His eyes bounce around the entire room, scanning for any threat.

He’s unsure what he expected to find, but it was a tad more perilous than you simply sitting on the couch, staring open-mouthed at the TV.

“Uh…nothing. Sorry.” Your face flushes. The remote is still raised and pointed at the screen.

“Vol…tron?” Jason reads from the title sequence that plays in the preview window. “Is this some kind of anime?”

“No…sort of, maybe,” you say. “It doesn’t matter. I'm just surprised to see it is all. I loved this show when I was younger.”

“Is it any good?” He asks.

You look to the side, thinking about it. You settle on: “Define good.”

His forehead wrinkles, mouth falling slightly open. “Did you…enjoy watching it?”

“Define enjoy.”

“Okay, forget I asked.” He sighs and goes back to the kitchen.

When he returns a few minutes later, floor pretzels in the trash and counter pretzels swept into the bowl, you’re already watching the first episode.

“This your choice?” He asks. You take the bowl in your lap and he settles down next to you, his arm wrapping around your waist.

“Definitely not. Just wanted to reminisce until you got back.” You frown at the bowl. “Where are all the pretzels?”

He chuckles. “That’s what you get for screaming. Dropped ‘em on the floor.”

You pout. “I didn’t scream. I was surprised. Now the ratio’s off, there’s not enough saltiness to balance the sweetness.”

“Poor baby,” he croons sarcastically. “Only getting a quarter bag of pretzels ‘stead of a full.”

You were going to switch the television to a movie you both liked, but you spent the entire first episode bickering about the important role each ingredient plays in, what you call, “The Party Mix Experience”. The next episode auto-played on its own, and you let it.

During the second episode, you and Jason were absorbed in a competition to see who could catch more flying popcorn pieces in their mouth (Jason), which then devolved into seeing who could dodge more popcorn kernels thrown to the face (also Jason).

By the beginning of episode three, you settled into meaningless chatter while paying half-hearted attention to the TV screen, and by the end, you were laid out on the couch, head in Jason’s lap, while you scrolled on your phone and he stroked your hair. You drifted to a light sleep, coaxed by his fingers scratching at your scalp. 

When you wake from your nap, there’s a blanket draped over you and Jason’s hand is still settled in your hair. You push yourself up to sit beside him, speaking through a yawn. “How long was I asleep?”

Jason adjusts the blanket so it covers both of you. “Um…I dunno. Three episodes, maybe.”

“You’re still watching,” you remark, as the end credits for episode six begin to roll.

He says nothing. You both stare as the auto-play timer for the next episode counts down. Next to the remote, his fingers twitch.

You purse your lips, suppressing a grin. “You know, there’s quite an online community for people who like this show.”

“Ha. Were you part of it?” He muses.

“Yup. And I deserve a medal of valor for my time in those trenches.” You kiss his cheek and stand up, stretching your arms. “I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” he says. His voice is low and gravelly with weariness.

You turn toward the bedroom when a call of your name stops you.

“Is it just me, or is something goin’ on between the red guy and the blue guy?”

“Oh, honey,” you sigh. It’s loud and pitying. You bend down to cup his cheek and draw him in for a kiss. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Babe!” He yells after you as you disappear into the bedroom. “You didn’t answer my question!”

iii.

It’s only a Hallmark movie, but with how he’s reacting, it might as well be six hours of paint drying. Jason is not eager to spend his night watching some boring, formulaic cliché, but it's late and you don't have anything better to do.

“That is absolutely not true,” he says when you counter his protests with this excuse.

“It’s two o’clock in the morning, Jay. Is there anything else to do, except sleep?” You rub your tired eyes. Both of you could use some sleep but, burrowed as you are under a pile of blankets, moving all the way from the couch to the bed seems impossible.

He leans in close, lips brushing against your ear. “I can think of a few things.”

His warm breath tickles your neck, and you feel a shiver despite the heat you’ve conserved in your little blanket burrito. The faintest of kisses is pressed behind your ear, and his eyes glint with familiar mischief when he pulls back.

You brush him off, rolling your eyes in amusement. “Do any of those things involve flannel-wearing farmer hunks or the True Meaning of Christmas?”

Turning back to the television, you take the remote from his hands, catching the tail end of a disgruntled mumble about how ‘I can buy a flannel…’

He grumbles a few more complaints during the movie’s first act (‘he’s not even that hunky’) before you scold him to silence. Once he’s quieted, and you settle more comfortably into him, your head is nestled securely in the crook of his shoulder with arms wrapped around his bicep. The warmth of him has you fighting against the tempting call of REM. Right around when the independent, successful, businesswoman protagonist discovers the handsome, flannel-clad man who helped repair her car is also the single father who runs an honest family business, you start to drift off, falling asleep amid thoughts of wearing plaid in the countryside.

You open your eyes to find yourself standing in a vast, open field. 

Thump. Thump.

It’s unclear where the sound is coming from, but a splash of red in your periphery stands out. You turn; there’s a barn off in the distance.

Thump.

Your legs carry you in its direction. Growing closer by the second, the thumping sound echoes louder in your ears. When you round the corner of the structure, the front doors are propped wide open by cement blocks, and bales of hay are stacked outside the doors. A large figure, whose back is to you, is lugging a bale by its straps. He hauls it onto his shoulder, and his shirtsleeves tighten around his thick arms. He brings it to the barn, tossing it onto a pile of more hay bales. It lands with that same thump.

When he turns around, it’s in slow motion.

The sleeves of his plaid flannel are rolled up his arms, exposing his large, veiny forearms. Under the flannel, he sports a simple white t-shirt, jeans, and work boots that give him an extra inch of height. His face and chest are shiny with sweat, and his shirt is soaked through. He holds a toothpick between gritted teeth.

It’s Jason. In a cowboy hat.

He takes off his hat and runs a hand through his hair. Its dampness makes it stay slicked back rather than settling into its usual shape where little curls are always falling over his eyes. Then, he sees you. A slow, sly grin spreads across his face. He puts his hat back on and removes the toothpick so he can speak.

“Hey there, little lady,” he drawls lazily, the Gotham accent you’re so accustomed to replaced with a southern twang. It does something to you that you’re a little embarrassed to admit. He looks you up and down, pausing above your knee for a split second before continuing.

“Hi,” you say, averting your gaze from where it had zeroed in on a droplet of sweat running down his neck. Your face burns redder than his beautifully sun-kissed cheeks.

He chuckles. “You jus’ gonna stand there or you gonna lend a hand? Compost ain’t gonna turn itself.”

He easily hauls up another bale, and you follow him into the barn.

You watch as he shirks it onto the pile, then repeats with the remaining few bales. He seems to forget you’re standing there as he gets so absorbed in his work, expression tightening in focus. You lean on the wooden post behind you and soak it in; every sound, every flexed muscle, every display of firm strength has you feeling like the air has been punched out of you. He carries the final bale into the barn and his low grunt as he throws it off his shoulder has a swooning sigh escape you. It catches his attention.

Your chest tightens in embarrassment as he prowls closer. He leans over you, hand against the wooden post right above your head. With him this close, a smattering of freckles is visible over the bridge of his nose, likely due to all the sun exposure. Huffing and sweaty, his eyes drag down your face and stop at your mouth. He swallows hard, and his Adam’s apple bobs up and down.

He lifts his free hand to trace over the thin strap of your top. His fingers ghost over the skin, barely touching. “This is pretty,” he says, voice low. “What’s a pretty girl like you doin’ all the way out here?”

And you just can’t help it anymore. You lurch up to him, desperate to close the space between you. You kiss him hard, and he kisses you back, his hand rising from your shoulder to grip the side of your neck. His thumb brushes your jaw, and your hands grip the material of his flannel, yanking it down to bring him even closer. You pull him against you so roughly that your head bumps the post behind you from the force. He smirks, teasing, into the kiss as his hand comes to cup the back of your head.

“Easy, sweetheart. I ain’t goin’ anywhere.” After getting his fill from your lips, he slowly graces a path to your neck, kissing, licking, and nipping as he goes. His relaxed leisure perfectly juxtaposes your frantic hunger for him.

You grip his face and pull his mouth back to yours, kissing him with even more fervor. You take his bottom lip between your teeth, biting down with little care for gentleness, and tug at the skin. He groans, and it rumbles deep in his throat. You soothe the spot with your tongue, and your eyes roll back into your head at the salty taste of his skin. As his tongue slides between your lips, he removes the hand that’s leaning onto the post and settles it on the skin of your thigh. It drags upward, feeling every inch of skin on his fingertips before disappearing under the hem of your skirt. At the same time, your hands slide down his body. His touch explores higher, and yours slips under his shirt to ground yourself on the hard skin of his abdomen, which has become slick with sweat.

The sound you make is debauched, coming from the deepest recesses of your stomach. He pulls back, wearing a cheeky smile. He opens his mouth to speak and says—

“Wait, what the fuck?”

You jerk awake. Jason is yelling.

“Why would you go with him?” He exclaims at the TV, and then turns to exclaim to you, “Why would she go with him?”

You stare at him, agape, trying to process your surroundings and asking yourself what just happened.

“Shit. Were you asleep?” Jason puts his outrage on hold.

You nod. “Yeah— yes.” Your voice comes out scratchy and hollow. “I was.”

“Sorry, baby. Didn’t mean to wake you up,” he says. His eyebrows furrow. “Are you hot?”

“What?”

“You look warm.” He presses the back of his hand to your flushed neck. “Is it too many blankets?”

Though his hand is cool, you feel even warmer, the image of his hand gripping that same spot of your neck flashing through your mind.

“I’m…good,” you say. “I think I’ll go to bed.” You dig yourself out of the shell of blankets and stand, but he doesn’t follow.

“Oh.” Jason glances at the TV, which is still in a commercial break. “You— did you want me to come?”

You don’t know what to say.

“The, uh…” He runs a hand through his hair, and you have to stifle a gasp. “The guy from her successful city life tracked her down to the small town to get back together. She said yes.” Then he sighs, sounding genuinely distressed. “There’s no way they’d end it like that, right? He was awful to her!”

At this, you crack a smile. “Do you want to finish the movie, Jason?” A hint of satisfaction seeps into your tone.

He clears his throat. “…Maybe.”

You plop back down on the couch with a hum. He interlaces your fingers and kisses the back of your hand before redirecting his attention to the screen.

“Babe?” You ask.

“Hm?” He answers, not looking away from the movie.

“Do you own any flannels?”

SAVE A HORSE RIDE A COWBOYYYYYYY

love when u leave messages and feedback it feeds my praise kink

for part one: cut to me sitting up in bed shrugging my shoulders over and over again to see which muscles it uses and if that coincides with the injuries i gave him to see if that action causing him pain makes sense (it was inconclusive so i made his injuries vague oopsie)

for part two: the bourne identity (2002) is a movie about a guy named jason who wakes up not knowing where or who he is and somehow has elite training in combat and surveillance, though he doesn't know where it's from. he runs around functioning on pure instinct to survive while getting bits of his memory back, remembering that whoever he worked for was cutthroat, expected him to obey no matter what, and forget the person he used to be before joining their mission. sound familiar?

for part three: cut to me genuinely tweaking while proofreading bc i let my friend read it and so rereading it, knowing that she read it, was so embarrassing. i was screaming into my pillow & it took 20 minutes to get through 2k words bc i had to keep taking breaks. not an exaggeration

If any of you saw me change the theme of my masterlist 5 times yesterday only to change it back to what it was before…no you didn’t

[cheqorb]

Sotto Voce.

Gaslighting everyone into believing you’re a really shit footballer because seeing people be impressed by your sheer lack of skill is more fun than being a genius.

FEAT. Bastard München ensemble

NOTES. uhhaua cross posted on ao3 (same user) but ajyway, thought this idea was funny and because of this lingering feeling of sadness i haha managed to Complete this?? Gosh im beside myself with worry!!

WORD COUNT. 2.2k

Isagi thinks he might be seeing things. Maybe all the relentless training in Blue Lock has finally caught up to him, leading him into a football-induced delirium, because he can’t quite comprehend what he’s looking at right now.

You’re moving across the field with a fluidity he’s only seen in pro-level players, doing tricks and turns he’s pretty sure aren’t even in his playbook. You glide past the defence, controlling the ball with a finesse that’s nearly supernatural — hell, he thinks even someone of Rin’s calibre would be breaking a sweat to try and keep up.

And you look bored while doing it. Eyes half-lidded, posture almost lazy, as if this is just another walk in the park and not you showing off world-class football technique.

Isagi’s mind races to make sense of this. You’d always been, well, normal to him.

Sometimes you’d play in a match, most other times you’d sit out on the sidelines. And he’s usually pretty sharp about these things, so it must’ve been because you just… didn’t stand out.

Yet here you are, pulling off flawless plays with little more than a mild yawn, as if winning against the top players here would barely register on your radar. Maybe it’s just luck, some freakish one-off, right?

… Nope. You just drilled another perfect goal into the top corner of the net.

He snaps out of his thoughts only when you suddenly stop mid-play, and his eyes meet yours. For a second, there’s a flicker of panic in your gaze and he opens his mouth, not even sure what he’s about to say.

“Y/N-”

You’re stomping towards him before he can even process the whole thing, your pace quicker and more full of menace than he’s used to seeing on you. You stop just short of him, tilt your head slightly, and in the calmest voice, say, “You saw nothing.”

He tries to stammer out something, but you leave soon afterwards.

────

Tripping over the ball is harder than it looks, but after enough practice, you’ve perfected the art of falling in a normal fashion. To most people, it’s convincing. Prior to a few days ago, you’d say all people but there’s a certain someone who entertains himself by boring holes into the back of your skull with an intense, unblinking stare.

You can feel it. Isagi waiting for you to slip up.

Actually slip up, instead of the falls you’ve gotten so good at imitating. It’s detestable, honestly. You’re trying to keep things as they’ve always been, and he just wants to come in and mess with the status quo!

Luckily for you, Igaguri’s too much of an idiot to harbour the same suspicions. Right now he’s too busy practically doubling over with laughter on the floor. The guy is probably thrilled to finally see someone playing the fool even more than he does. And as much as he’s a pain, he’s also the kind of person who makes perfect cover — play the role of an idiot, laugh it off with him, and everyone’s none the wiser.

So, in spite of your (what most would call) vindictive description of him, you do believe that some sort of strange pleasure is to be gained from surrounding yourself with people like him. Though perhaps that also makes you a terrible person.

The feeling is nothing like the rationale that Noa preaches about so often. It’s an undeniable truth in your heart.

Which is why you avoid the people who actually know what they’re doing on the field like the plague.

Yukimiya, on the other hand, is way too polite to laugh outright. He at least has the common sense to stifle it, reaching out a hand to help you off the ground with a quiet charm that makes people swoon. No wonder he’s a model.

Now, the imaginary audience in your mind might be wondering why you’re talking with a guy like him? Your answer: he’s not as notable ever since he patched things up with Isagi. He’s now the kind of person you can talk to without raising any brows. Again, it sounds harsh but you see it in a positive light. He’s becoming just the kind of person you adore most!

“Try and keep a close eye for stuff on the ground, alright?”

You flash him a grin, nodding. “You know me, just a total klutz all the time,” you reply as your usual happy-go-lucky self, making sure to project just loud enough for Isagi to hear.

And out of the corner of your eye, you catch that familiar look of suspicion deepening.

────

The silence that follows is brutal. Hiori and Kurona exchange a look that’s way too long for Isagi’s comfort. After finishing whatever telepathic debate they have with each other, they both stare back at him like he’s just pitched the most psychotic theory imaginable (which isn’t entirely untrue).

“You don’t believe me, do you?” he mutters, deflating a bit.

Hiori’s quick to reply, but Isagi is aware of the faintest flicker of amusement in his eyes. “It’s not that we don’t believe you. But, ya have to admit, it’s strange to hear Y/N… of all people, doing something like that.”

That’s code for what the fuck are you talking about, Isagi concludes with a grimace, his eyes shifting to Kurona hopefully.

“Crazy. Crazy.”

Kurona’s tone is deadpan, his gaze distant as if he’s trying not to laugh. Great.

Isagi sighs heavily, scrubbing a hand over his face. Maybe he is the one who’s going crazy here. It shouldn’t even bother him this much. It’s not like you’re particularly close! If anything, he can barely remember a conversation between the two of you that went beyond asking if you’d seen so and so.

And, judging by the responses he’s getting from both of his teammates, neither of them can figure out why he’s fixated on this either.

────

Noa is going on and on about practice drills, how to follow his instructions precisely, something about rationality and technique, blah, blah, blah. You stifle a yawn. If this is what being in one of the top clubs means, you should’ve begged Ego to be in Barcha instead. At least Lavinho would’ve been fun.

You hear his coaching style isn’t by any means phenomenal if you’re trying to improve your skills, but good thing you’re not planning on doing anything of the sort!

And just when you think you might actually pass out from boredom, you see Isagi walking over. Again. He’s approaching with that same cautious look, but it’s not enough to make him think twice about bothering you apparently. That’s also something that bugs you, he’s never a quitter.

You flash him an oblivious smile. “Oh, Isagi! Whatcha up to? Need anything from little ol’ me?”

You lay it on thick, voice dripping with cheerful innocence. His jaw tightens, and for a second, you swear you can see a flicker of annoyance on his face. That’s new. Your words have the opposite effect than what you had originally intended.

“Listen, I know what I saw, alright? You’re not fooling anyone.”

He launches into a whole spiel about how he’s seen you pull off moves that only high-level players can pull off, how he doesn’t care if it’s part of some large game you’re playing, how you should be using your skill to distinguish yourself.

…You really don’t give a shit, and in regards to his comments, you personally disagree! What’s the fun in doing all of that?

You tilt your head, pretending to think it over with wide, guileless eyes. Sure, you’re a little flattered he’s this invested in uncovering your “secret,” but the other 99% of you is totally unhappy.

When he finally wraps up his little speech, you just give him a half-hearted shrug with a smugness that he doesn’t miss.

“And who’s going to believe you?”

────

Kaiser likes to think of Isagi as predictable, average — someone who might fancy himself a hero but is ultimately just another small-time player waiting to be crushed. It’s almost laughable how seriously he takes himself. In fact, the only thing remotely worth mentioning about him recently is this bizarre fixation he seems to have developed on you.

He’s overheard your exchanges, and in short, they’re pathetic.

Isagi rambles on about how you’re hiding something, clinging to that delusion like it’s going to benefit him somehow. The psychology-lover inside him finds it almost fascinating in how utterly absurd it sounds.

So, when Kaiser spots you chatting with the ever despairing Grim (laughing so hard you have to hold back tears), he figures it wouldn’t be wrong to call you at least a little insane. Part of him wonders what humour could be found in the man’s deplorable monologues.

He figures he might as well join in on the entertainment. You’re far from his usual company, but you’ll do. For now. Moseying on over, his signature smirk is already in place.

He’s rewarded by the way your eyes immediately narrow in irritation, a look he’s all too familiar with and thoroughly enjoys on anyone really. Grim, blissfully unaware of what he’s leaving you to, heads off, and now it’s just you and Kaiser.

Leaning in closer, he asks, “What little secret of yours has got under Yoichi’s skin so badly?”

Kaiser waits, watching for the faintest flicker of reaction but you stay silent. How boring.

But! Not one to give up easily, he continues with a more direct jab, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial tone. The one where he acts like he knows everything there is to know about everyone. “That you’re really skilled, and this whole clueless act of yours is just a cheap facade?”

He raises a brow, as if daring you to admit it. To his delight, you lift your head, finally meeting his gaze albeit with an uncomfortably polite smile.

“I was just surprised you’re interested in something like that. But, Isagi’s a total liar. Isn’t he just so annoying? I can’t stand people who just don’t know when to give up, and I’m sure you agree.”

It’s not often someone catches him off-guard, and though he recovers quickly, the flicker of surprise is still there. Kaiser also sees opportunity however. He could work with this.

“Well, if you’re not a fan of Yoichi then feel free to join my side then,” he drawls, offering the position like it’s a dream come true. In his world, he’s already the star; what better way to elevate himself than to recruit someone.

“Ah, no. You’re both terrible.”

He can’t tell what’s worse; you lumping him together with Isagi, or the fact that you immediately walk off without giving him a chance to get the last word in.

────

“It’s like asking me if I prefer cat shit or dog shit. It’s still shit, and there’s no point in picking one over the other.”

You toss the comparison out to Kiyora, of all people — a bit of a waste since he just stares blankly at you, not saying a word. Pretty cute, actually, in a clueless sort of way.

The reality is that, at the moment, if you want a shot at the regulars, you’re supposed to cosy up to either Isagi or Kaiser. And as for everyone else? They’re can either fuck off or pray for a miracle.

Of course, you couldn’t care less about making the regulars. But every now and then, you forget there are people around you who do care, people with actual ambitions. Which is why you pause when you catch sight of Hiori and Kurona.

“Oh, Hiori and Kurona,” you point out the obvious.

They both glance your way, casual and relaxed, which gives you the impression that Isagi hasn’t roped them into his latest paranoid theories. Yet.

“Are ya heading back to training already?” Hiori asks, his soft voice and accent making it sound more like an invitation than a question. There’s a kindness to it that’s almost unsettling here in Blue Lock, but you return his smile with one of your own nevertheless.

Kiyora gives a small nod. “Yeah,” he says, brief and to the point.

You’re half-considering some excuse to slip away and do your own thing, but there’s something about the way Hiori is looking at you that draws your attention. Unlike Isagi, he’s way better at hiding it, but you can still feel his curiosity prickle under your skin.

You give him a lazy smile, leaning into the idea. “I’m already so tired from this morning’s training,” you lie, exaggerating just enough. “Honestly, going to bed early sounds great right about now.”

Morning training was barely enough to get you sweating, just a couple of warm-up drills for the afternoon matches. You doubt they have any clue what you’re talking about, which is exactly how you want it.

There’s a quiet pause, and then Hiori breaks it with a gentle but firm nudge. “Well, if yer looking to get on the regulars consistently, training more could be worth a shot.”

You force a smile that probably looks more akin to a grimace. This is exactly why you don’t like smart people. They poke and prod until your story frays at the edges. He definitely asked that on purpose! With a heavy sigh, you end up walking with them toward the pitch, despite every nerve in you screaming to veer off.

You can’t help but wonder if this is a test.

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

Burn Out

I would. Absolutely do the cast but. Consider. The casts parents instead.

Also as you can probably guess, I'm feeling burnt out so my writing may not be as good as it usually is but fuck it we ball. Yes I will be using headcanon names for the Cast Parents because. um. I can.

Family Headcanons here if you want to read.

Also there's no Diasomnia except for Sebek. Sorry. Don't attack me please I beg OTL NO SPOILERS PLEASE OTL ----------------------------------------

Dr. Carlotta Rosehearts is not the type of woman to be easily impressed. Burn out is something only the weak experience, though if you weren't raised by her, she can hardly blame YOU for your poor constitution. While she's not all that sympathetic, she can find a small, easy task for you to complete to feel like you've been productive, useful, and otherwise intelligent.

Dr. Lawson Hatter, Riddle's estranged (engineer) father couldn't be any MORE experienced with burn out. He's awkward, he's odd, but his antics are sure to put a smile on your face. He can spot someone trying to work through burn out easily - not in his house baby, he's spinning that chair around and away from the desk, you're coming to get snuggled up and watch a movie with him and his kid(s). He'll make you tea (or coffee if you want it), a bunch of snacks, and promises to help you with your work later. Right now is time to let that all go and let your brain be mush for a bit. It's okay.

Amelia and Tarrant Clover - they're a little burnt out constantly themselves, but there's always room at the table for one more. Their home is only a good option if you like little kids though, because they WILL treat you like you're their big sibling almost immediately. They don't mean to come off as a little uncanny, but they genuinely do love having guests so much. Be prepared for So. Much. Food. If you can't really handle the hubbub of the family, that's okay too. Amelia will invite you to join her for her evening prep. She has a way of making you let all those feelings come out when it's just the two of you, and by the time you're done crying, she's got fresh banana bread and hot chocolate in front of you, with a pat on the back. She'll hug you if you want it too.

The Diamond couple have way too much tension between them to be of much help to you. Cater's older, but not eldest, sister, Catrina, is rather reserved and quiet when she's allowed to be. She'd be the one to take you into her room, do your hair, maybe some aromatherapy and tai chi. She's learned a lot of ways to relax over the years, she's just happy to share it with someone who is too exhausted to be fake with her. willing to let her help.

Dylla Spade hi, hello, did you want to make a top three guardians list? Dylla is there, promise. There is no overworking in her house. She can appreciate the dedication, but 1. you are actively harming yourself, 2. you should never work that hard in a workplace, why are you doing it for free /hj. She'll try to interrupt once or twice with the bribe of a small snack, or with going out somewhere, but if you're stubborn she's got to pull out the big guns. Big guns being she puts a photo of baby Deuce on the desk next to you and tells you if you want to know the story you're going to stop, go take a shower to give your brain a transition period out of work and go meet her in the kitchen. She's not the best cook but by god you know everything she gave you she gave with love.

Jack Trappola-Hearts is not Ace's dad, (ew, says Ace in the back of my mind), but his big brother. He's got a humble, somewhat dated one-bedroom apartment. He'll sleep on the couch though, so you can have the bed. (If Ace is there, Jack will sleep on the floor). He likes keeping you entertained and smiling, so he'll take you around town to (free) but fun areas. He doesn't expect you to verbally respond if you don't want to, and if you need to, he'll happily create a way for you to communicate when you're ready to go home. He'll keep you distracted from your responsibilities and burdens until he knows you can tackle them full force again.

Falena Kingscholar has a BIG and BRIGHT personality. He means the best, but he can sometimes be a little insensitive to your efforts, (as he was to his brother). He's also very busy and repressing his own burn out and Other Emotions, but don't fret. Kifaji will look after you. He's careful to not hover, but he always pops in with exactly what you need. He can't be as attentive as he would like, but he does know where the younger prince used to sneak off for naps. He may or may not drop a hint or two as to where those places are, and he may or may not have made sure to set the area up with soft lighting, music, blankets and curtains to give you some elevated sense of privacy without being overwhelmed by your surroundings (hopefully).

Vovó Bucchi (yes I borrowed a headcanon name provided by @kamiraaah (sorry for the tag, if you want it removed lmk!! ^^) can't help but make fun of you a tiny bit, but it's all just to remind you that hard work is meant to be rewarded. Hard work is meant to be balanced out with something else. While you're clearly bright, you're apparently not bright enough to realize when you need a break on your own /lh. She'll ask you to tell her about the things you HAVE accomplished over the past month while cooking food for the family, (and yes, having you be her taste tester all through out it), and wait til you're done to ask what you've done to motivate yourself to keep going. If you've got nothing, she's going to tell you to come home with Ruggie at the end of every other week. Yes, home. You're hers now. Good luck escaping custody.

Citlali and Ande Howl couldn't be more opposite in how they try to help you through burn out. Citlali is just a 4'2 ball of energy and affection, you best believe she's got hugs for days, homemade quilts to pile on you, a hot chocolate she meant to give you about 40 minutes ago but forgot while she was rambling, (she'll heat it back up), a child to hand you - wait, no that's going to her husband, that's not your responsibility. She'll talk your EARS off, but you come to love it. Ande is much more stoic, a little intimidating to some, and very awkward. Mans does not know how to come off as friendly. He offers a hug if you need it. Best hug of your life. He will also show you where you can go to brood get a breath of fresh air and relax.

Clara and Ginerva "Nonna" Ashengrotto (you MAY NOT call Nonna anything but Nonna. Only Nonna's friends can call her Ginny, and 'Ms. Ashengrotto' is her daughter.) Clara and her mom are both all too familiar with the dangers of burn out. You get burnt out, you make bad decisions, bad decisions lead to trouble down the road and honey you do not need to make your life any more complicated than it already is. Sit down, stuff your face, listen to jazz, be happy. Basic rules. Your plate will not be allowed to be empty, be prepared to probably eat so much you pass out, which will be the one and only bad decision you make that day, but it's better than Nonna asking why you ain't eatin' her cooking. If you do get too full, don't worry, they'll tease but they'll pack up what's left and the other 27 meals they prepared for you to take home. (Nonna is partially deaf so you will have to raise your voice a bit so she can hear you clearly).

guysguysguysguysguysguysguysguys it's my favourite next do you know who's my favourite I know who's my favourite I literally wrote this just so I could write for her do you know who's my favourite fuck YEAH YOU DO

Valeria Leech (and her husband I guess but I'm pretending Constantine Leech is not there because I want to focus on the queen that is Mama Fucking Leech)(He would be kind of detached anyways he doesn't know you and he doesn't owe you nothin', his wife just said he wasn't allowed to eat you). ANYWAYS. Mama Leech has a lot of energy, Floyd had to get it from somewhere and it is absolutely from his mama. While she can be a little all over the place, clearly her boys appreciate you if they went through the effort to bring you to her, and that means um. You're her kid now too. She will treat you like she treats her sons. This means an overwhelming amount of physical touch (she will tone down if asked or if her husband reminds her that not everyone is comfortable with that), a lot of food being offered to you, you get the (second) best bed in the house, she has already bought you new clothes- ordering on land clothes, but also things tourists to the Coral Sea would wear. Because how can you expect to overcome burn out when you're stuck in a rut and nothing has changed. You need a good sleep schedule, a good meal, and a way to feel fabulous about yourself. And probably a hug and a good cry session. And maybe a hobby to let out all that steam, do you want to learn to fight hand to hand or do you want to collect tiny glass figurines, she'll buy the same subscription as she has if you want she LOVES little glass figurines they're cute and delicate just like elvers are. She will cry when you have to go back to land, promise her you'll call her if you need her for anything. Whether it's a hug or hiding a body. She's got your back. Also in the top 3 mama's tbh but I'm very very very biased but I also still think I'm right.

Akram al Asim is a little lost on what to do, but Kalim cares about you, so so does he. He doesn't really know what to do on an emotional basis, so he gives you money and tells you that if staying in the palace is too much, you're welcome to go stay in one of their private mansions instead. And if you need more money to just ask. So staying at "home" and having someone cook and clean for you while you get to do nothing is a 10/10 way to help burn out. He does not know how to help people that are stubborn or reject his gift unfortunately, he just kinda stands there like a deer in the headlights, then just welcomes you to stay in his home as long as you like. (This is a bad idea, you're a friend of Kalim's and given the family dynamics we know about you may very well be used as leverage, um. yeah. That's not very cash money.)

Nasir and Amani Viper can offer their home and to share dinner with you, but they are kept busy all day. They can recognize burn out - they've seen it in their son, and experienced it themselves, but they've never gotten a break to work through it. They'll tell you to rest, to eat, to make yourself at home, but it's a little awkward to relax when everyone around you is working.

Eric Venue oh dear. oh dear, oh dear oh dear. Burn out is a killer of creativity darling, and we simply cannot have that. Again, not someone who can help all that much directly, he'll toss a little money at you and get you into a luxurious spa to get you to relax again, to rejuvenate your skin and your mind. Also concerned for your mental health and MAY have paid off a therapist to become your friend so you'll never know you're receiving therapy throughout the entire thing, you'll cry, you'll let that out, and you'll never see that friend again. But you don't know that yet and for now you feel better!

The Hunts fall into the bottom category of parents. Ibis Hunt, Rook's next eldest sister (bc I think the Hunt's named their kids after birds), will try her best. She practically raised Rook, so she knows what a good night out by the campfire can do, campfire dinner, marshmallows, a couple goofy songs on the guitar, and a horror story if you think you can handle it. She'll keep your mind off of things.

Meemaw (Marja) Felmier can and will bop you over the head with her cane if she sees you trying to work when you clearly can't anymore. "You're so worn slap out y'ain't got 'nother ounc'a thinkin' in there. Y'got a hankerin' for somethin'? I'll fix it up right quick. Come on now, carryin' on on an empty stomach ain't gonna fix y'problems." She purposely has you sit on the comfiest chair on the house, layers you up in blankets, gives you a stuffy and warm apple cider because she KNOWS you're gonna pass right out. And when you wake up, there will be Marja's famous apple crumble with homemade vanilla ice cream waiting for you, trust.

Dr. Isla and Rodian Shroud are HUGE advocates for self care, but know sometimes it takes another person to pull you away from what's frustrating you. Isla will GLADLY take you on in a gaming competition - and she might even take it easy on you. And you'll hear her full Aussie accent come out any time you over take her in the equivalent of Mario Kart. Rodian is much more likely to be subtle in the way he helps, asking you to come assist on a project. Idle prattle turns into a deeper conversation that lets you open up to him, and the simple tasks he gives you to make you feel like you're being useful help a lot too. If you do end up crying, he'll offer a hug, and then a place to sleep off the rest of the emotions. You'll wake up to a 3D printed figurine of your favourite animal, cookies, and a thermos that kept the milk cold. The last of the Mom top 3 imo. (Mom's do not include grandma's btw thus the exclusion of Vovo and Marja /lh)

Baul Zigvolt okay listen. Modern day? I can't help imagine him with a big beer belly and a laugh to match. He's lost all the intensity he had in chapter 7 (thus far, no spoilers please lol). If you're feeling burnt out, he's giving you food the way he would have given it to baby Sebek - he's still adjusting to humans, so forgive him for cutting everything up so small, but hey, hopefully you won't choke? And some water. He's got a lovely voice, so with your permission, he'll read to you or tell you stories from when he and Lilia were younger - or if you really want it, he'll sing you to sleep...that's his goal anyways. He will not let you sleep in though LMAO, you went to bed early, get ready to be up at the crack of dawn lol.

---------------------------------------

Anyways, thanks for reading my Partially Coherent Ramblings. Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist

@my-cursed-brain @fluffle-writes @distant-velleity @starry-night-rose @theleechyskrunkly @elenauaurs @lumdays @nemisisnemi

[ellswritings]

Like I Can

James Potter x Reader

TW: Cute fluff, idiots in love, mutual pining.

Based on “Like I Can” by Sam Smith 🫶

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚🦋˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚🦋˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡ ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚🦋˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡

The Quidditch pitch buzzed with excitement as Gryffindor’s final match of the season drew to a close. Y/N, perched confidently on her broomstick, was a force to be reckoned with as the team’s Keeper. James Potter, the ever-charismatic Seeker, soared high above the game, his eyes darting between the Snitch and his favorite distraction: her.

She blocked yet another shot from Slytherin’s Chasers with a deft flick of her wrist. The crowd erupted into cheers, but James barely registered them. His focus lingered on her—her determination, her skill, the way her smile lit up the entire pitch. She was brilliant. And yet, there she was, constantly entertaining the advances of the most undeserving blokes.

By the time James caught the Snitch, securing Gryffindor’s victory, Y/N was already back on the ground, laughing with the team. But his celebratory mood soured when he saw who had approached her: Marcus Flint, a smarmy Slytherin with a reputation for sweet-talking girls.

“Brilliant saves today, Y/L/N,” Marcus drawled, leaning in closer than necessary. “I bet you’d look just as good off the pitch.”

Y/N’s laughter rang out, though James could tell it was more polite than genuine. Still, the fact that she humored him made James’ blood boil.

He shoves his glasses higher up his nose and turns to Sirius, who was already grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“She’s just being polite,” James muttered, as Sirius slung an arm around his shoulders.

“Polite?” Sirius barked a laugh. “Mate, she’s practically inviting him to Hogsmeade with that smile.”

Remus, who had just walked over, gave James a look. “You could just tell her how you feel, you know. Instead of standing here glaring holes into the poor bloke.”

“And miss out on watching this love triangle unfold?” Peter chimed in, grinning.

James ignored them, opting instead to yell, “Team meeting in five minutes!” just loud enough to interrupt Y/N’s conversation. She glanced at him, raising an eyebrow, before turning back to the Slytherin.

This was only the beginning.

In the library, Y/N and Remus often sat together, their heads bent over books. James would join them under the pretense of studying, though he spent most of his time watching Y/N.

“James, you’ve been staring at the same page for fifteen minutes,” Y/N said, raising an eyebrow. “Need some help?”

“Maybe,” he admitted, sliding his Potions textbook toward her. “Think you can save me from another Howler from Mum?”

Y/N chuckled, flipping through the pages. “Alright, but only because I’m feeling generous. Start by not adding twice as much dragon liver as the recipe calls for.”

“See, this is why I need you,” James said with a mock-serious expression. “You’re the brains of this operation.”

“And you’re the charm, I suppose?” Y/N replied, smirking.

“Obviously,” James said, winking. “It’s a good thing I’ve got you to balance me out.”

On top of being the most obnoxious and charming students in the school, The Marauders’ pranks were legendary, and Y/N quickly became a member of their mischief-making crew her first year. She and Sirius made an especially chaotic duo, often dragging James and Remus into their schemes.

“Are you sure this will work?” James asked, eyeing the enchanted balloons they’d filled with color-changing paint.

“Of course it will,” Y/N said confidently, handing him a balloon. “Just aim for Filch’s office window.”

“I thought you were the sensible one,” Remus muttered, though he was already holding a balloon of his own.

“Sometimes, sensible is boring,” Y/N replied with a mischievous grin.

As the first balloon hit its target, exploding in a burst of green and gold paint, the group dissolved into laughter. James couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so carefree.

About a week or so later, the Marauders found themselves at the Three Broomsticks. James had hoped for a quiet afternoon, but when Y/N entered, arm-in-arm with a cocky Hufflepuff who had clearly overdosed on self-confidence, his mood soured.

“Oi, Prongs,” Sirius teased, nudging James’s arm. “There’s your girl.”

“She’s not my girl,” James snapped, though his eyes were glued to Y/N as she laughed at something the Hufflepuff said.

“She could be,” Remus pointed out, his tone calm but pointed. “If you actually said something.”

James groaned, sinking into his seat. “She wouldn’t be interested. Look at her! She’s... brilliant. And she’s dating that git.”

Peter snorted. “She’s humoring him, mate. Big difference.”

But James couldn’t take his friends’ advice. Instead, he found himself watching from the sidelines, frustration mounting as the Hufflepuff leaned too close and Y/N laughed a little too hard.

“Doesn’t it bother you to have such overprotective friends?” Dorian McMaster, the Hufflepuff Y/N agreed to hang out with for the day asks her. His eyes narrow over at James and the other boys who are now trying to pretend they weren’t just staring at her.

The (h/c) haired girl shrugs, “I wouldn’t call them overprotective,” she defends.

“Then why haven’t they stopped staring at you since we walked in?” He asks with an almost disgusted expression.

“Because they probably want me to go say hi?” Y/N tilts her head. “I don’t know. I’m not them.”

“I’m getting real sick of that Potter,” Dorian grumbles. “He thinks he owns everything.”

Y/N puts her hand up to stop him, “Well, first of all, he doesn’t think he owns anything. Second of all, if you’re implying what I think you are, I can confidently tell you that I am not something that can be owned.”

Dorian rolls his eyes, “Look, all I’m saying is that you agreed to come here with me. That git needs to back off.”

Y/N laughs lowly before standing from her seat. She shakes her head with a dangerous smile, “Just because your father happens to be the head of the Department of Mysteries doesn’t give you a right to act like an entitled prat. James isn’t a git, but it seems you are.” She smooths over her robe, “Now, if you’ll excuse me.”

“Are you gonna go after her?” Remus looks at James expectantly as they watch Y/N saunter out of the Three Broomsticks, leaving a fuming Dorian behind.

James looks after the girl, a battle going on inside of his mind. “No,” he finally mumbles with a sigh. “She doesn’t need me hovering.”

Sirius, Remus, and Peter all collectively groan, rolling their eyes at his ignorance. It’s rather irritating watching the two of them constantly play cat and mouse with one another. It’s clear to everyone but them that they are head over heels for one another.

“Ten galleons says he cracks by the end of the month,” Remus whispers over to Peter and Sirius as James continues staring longingly at the door Y/N just walked out of.

“I’ll take that action.”

Weeks passed, and James Potter’s resolve wavered. The relentless teasing from his friends only made things worse, especially as Y/N continued to attract attention from boys who couldn’t possibly see her the way he did. She wasn’t just beautiful; she was brilliant, witty, and fiercely independent. She had passed all her O.W.L.s with Outstanding marks and still somehow found time to pull pranks with him and Sirius. To James, she was everything.

It was maddening. Every smile she gave to someone else, every laugh she shared, every time another boy got too close. The jealousy gnawed at him like a persistent itch he couldn’t scratch. If only she knew how much space she occupied in his thoughts, how he wanted nothing more than to sweep her off her feet and show her what they could be together. He just needed a chance—one chance to prove he was the one for her.

The breaking point came during one of Slughorn’s infamous parties. James arrived late, his confidence faltering the moment he saw her. She was on the arm of yet another admirer, a Ravenclaw seventh-year who prided himself on his intellect. James couldn’t take his eyes off her. She wore a dress that shimmered with every movement, and her laughter carried across the room like a melody he couldn’t ignore.

The Ravenclaw boy leaned in to whisper something in her ear, and she smiled, but James noticed the slight distance in her expression. When the boy’s hand drifted a little too low on her back, James’ restraint snapped. He drained his goblet of punch, handed it off to Sirius with a muttered, “Wish me luck,” and crossed the room.

“Y/N, can I have a word?” he asked, his voice steady despite the storm raging inside him.

She looked up at him, surprised, and then turned to her date, who seemed ready to protest. “I’ll be right back,” she said, brushing off the boy’s attempts to intervene. James felt a surge of satisfaction as she followed him to a quieter corner of the room.

James took a deep breath, gathering his courage. His heart pounded as the words tumbled out before he could stop them. “No matter how many guys you date, they’ll never treat you the way I can. They don’t see you—not really. They don’t know how brilliant you are, how funny, how you scrunch your nose when you’re annoyed. They don’t know you like I do.” He paused, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “They can be the most famous bloke in London, or some homeless man on the street, but they’ll never be me. I know it’s meant to be you and I.”

Y/N stared at him, her eyes wide with something he couldn’t quite place. Then, to his horror, she smirked.

“James Potter, are you confessing your undying love for me?” she teased, her voice laced with amusement.

James ran a hand through his hair, a nervous habit she’d always found endearing. “I’m serious, Y/N. I—”

“I’m just joking,” she interrupted, her smirk softening into a gentle smile. “I’ve always known, James.”

His breath hitched. “And?”

“And you’re an idiot for waiting this long,” she replied, stepping closer. “But I suppose that means you’re my idiot.”

The world seemed to fade away as she closed the distance between them, her lips meeting his in a kiss that was long overdue. It was soft and electrifying all at once, a culmination of years of unspoken feelings. James felt like he was floating, his heart soaring higher than any Quidditch match ever could.

From across the room, Sirius clapped Remus on the back, the latter groaning as he handed over ten galleons. “Should’ve bet on the party,” he muttered.

Later that night, as James walked Y/N back to the Gryffindor common room, their hands intertwined, he couldn’t help but grin like an idiot. She looked up at him, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

“So, Potter,” she said, “does this mean you’re finally going to stop glaring at every boy who talks to me?”

“Not a chance,” he replied, pulling her closer. “But they’ll never stand a chance now, will they?”

She laughed, and the sound was music to his ears. “You’re impossible.”

“And you love it,” he quipped, his grin widening.

As they stepped into the common room, Sirius and Remus were waiting by the fire, their faces alight with poorly disguised glee.

“Finally!” Sirius exclaimed, throwing his arms up dramatically. “Do you know how exhausting it’s been watching you two dance around each other?”

“Subtle as always, Padfoot,” Y/N said dryly, though her smile betrayed her amusement.

Remus chuckled, closing his book. “We’re happy for you both. Truly.”

James glanced at Y/N, his chest swelling with pride and affection. “Thanks, Moony. Means a lot.”

Sirius leaned forward, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “So, Y/N, now that you’re officially part of the Potter package, does this mean you’ll help us prank the Slytherins next week?”

Y/N raised an eyebrow, her lips curving into a smirk. “What makes you think I wasn’t already involved?”

James burst out laughing, pulling her into a side hug. “That’s my girl.”

In the days that followed, James found himself unable to keep his hands to himself. Whether it was brushing his fingers against hers in the corridors or slinging an arm around her shoulders during meals, he reveled in the newfound closeness. But the jealousy lingered, bubbling to the surface whenever someone dared to flirt with her.

One afternoon in the library, a Slytherinboy approached Y/N, clearly smitten. James watched from across the room, his jaw tightening as the boy leaned a little too close. When Y/N caught James’ eye and winked, he relaxed marginally, though he still made a point to saunter over and plant a possessive kiss on her cheek.

“Hey, love,” he said casually, wrapping an arm around her waist. “Everything alright here?”

The Slytherin stammered an excuse and quickly retreated, leaving Y/N to shake her head in exasperation.

“Was that really necessary?” she asked, though her tone was more amused than annoyed.

“Absolutely,” James replied, grinning. “Can’t have anyone forgetting who you belong to.”

Y/N rolled her eyes but couldn’t suppress her smile. “You’re lucky I find your jealousy endearing.”

“Lucky doesn’t even begin to cover it,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to her temple.

Their relationship quickly became the talk of the school, much to James’ delight. He wore his love for Y/N like a badge of honor, unashamed and unapologetic. And while Y/N occasionally pretended to be annoyed by his antics, she secretly adored the way he made her feel like the center of his universe.

As the year progressed, the Marauders found countless ways to tease James, but he took it all in stride. After all, he had Y/N by his side, and that was all that mattered. Together, they were unstoppable—a perfect match in every sense of the word.

[arvandus]

Ok more thoughts on Dabi’s ending…

Like I’m not even mad about him dying, honestly. I get that his story has always been one riddled in tragedy. I love tragic characters so tragic endings sorta come with the package (still crying over the ending for Loki season 2).

I appreciate, from a literary standpoint, the impact of dying by one’s own rage. Of letting that hurt and anger literally consume you until there’s practically nothing left of you. I see that that is what they were going for with him, and that part is FINE. Sad as fuck, but not shocking, not surprising.

The issue I have with it is the context and overall messaging. The fact that Dabi dies but Endeavor doesn’t; I’m not even saying that Enji needed to die, and he does get permanently injured and has to give up hero work. BUT the fact that Enji, the abuser and the source of so many people’s pain, not only lives but gets to still have the support of at least some of his family (Natsuo, I love you baby!) leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

I think it’s because I’ve never found Enji’s redemption very convincing. I’m not saying this in a “he’s evil and has no soul” sort of way, but it’s more in the fact that his actions have always been rooted in cowardice and ego. The fact that Enji gives up being a hero because he got injured in battle rather than giving up being a hero willingly because it was the very thing that made him so toxic and awful to begin with… meh. Not to mention he still had his son face off with his other son instead of confronting him directly. He still dilly dallied and never went searching for Touya after their initial conflict and reveal even though Shouto wanted to. That’s what I mean when I say Enji’s redemption was half-assed. He was too much of a coward and too focused on being a hero to the masses instead of being a father to his children and that never changed for him. So did he realize what he did in the past was wrong? Yes. Did he feel bad about it? Sure. Did he take the appropriate steps to right past wrongs? No. No he fucking didn’t. Too little, too late.

But it’s not just about Enji. It’s also the hopelessness that’s communicated by Shouto failing to save his brother and never have soba with him in the end. And it’s a message of hopelessness that’s communicated with Toga and Shigaraki’s deaths as well. I don’t know if they we’re going for a “loss of innocence/you can’t save everyone” sort of vibe as a part of the student characters growing up into adults, but it still just made it all feel sort of… pointless in the end. And that pointlessness was emphasized even more by how unmoved they all seemed to be in the aftermath/ending of the story. Not really much mourning, not really much regret. Add to that that the overall status quo seems to be maintained, and really it feels as if nothing has changed; nothing has gotten better (even though supposedly it has??).

I dunno. Take what I say with a grain of salt cuz I haven’t read the ending and I’ve gotten the info from tumblr screenshots. But I’m tired and don’t have it in me to pick it back up again. If the characters are going to die, that’s fine, but make it meaningful, make it worth it, make it cataclysmic in the ushering in of a better world. Give me systems of support within the society to help people in need, people with dangerous quirks. Give me a dismantling of the popularity aspect of heroism, because a system built on the monetization and entertainment cannot also be a moral system. Show me how you’re addressing the toxicity of hero worship, how you’re dismantling the pedestals so that quirkless children aren’t bullied and heroes aren’t driven to madness in the fight to the top.

If you can’t give me those things, then what’s the point. It’s just more of the same. Your story gave us nothing.

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

Cete

Vampire!Anselm Vogelweide x Blue Jones x Vampire!afab!Reader • Rating: 18+ pals • Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | request info • ko-fi •

Summary: You and your husband are enjoying entertaining a guest.

A/N: For @oddballwriter and their wonderful thoughts about Trine but vampires, you're so correct. (I'm sure this fic is 10000% only going to interest me, but there we go.)

Trine Masterlist

Warnings: Anselm and reader are married, Blue not realising he's in a relationship with vampires, blow jobs, hand jobs, biting, blood drinking, not beta read, please let me know if I have missed a warning!

Word Count: 2132

Blue opens his eyes groggily, his head throbbing. 

He groans and rolls over in bed, away from the early afternoon sunshine that’s cutting into his eyes. It stings. Burns almost. 

He must have a hangover. That was it. That must be it. 

Blue sits up slowly, pulling off the golden silk sheets that have become wrapped around his body while he slept. 

There’s a pitch of water and an ornate glass on the bedside table. But suddenly his mouth is so dry that even the thought of bothering to pour the water into a glass irritates him. He takes hold of the jug and downs it in three long glugs. 

He dresses quickly, but stands up too fast and has to lay down again for a few minutes until the wave of dizziness passes. 

When he looks at himself in the surprisingly small mirror on the vanity he looks pale, drawn, with dark circles under his eyes. He tuts, rubbing his hand over his skin and the stubble on his jaw. Really, he should bathe and shave. Maybe after breakfast. 

Before Blue heads downstairs he adjusts his shirt, it’s loose, billowy and starch white with a low deep collar. You and Anselm always seemed to lay out a similar style for him. 

He doesn’t run into anyone on the way, which he has grown used to. It’s like the mansion comes alive at night, especially with all the parties and soirees you and Anselm throw, your staff are practically on a permanent night shift. 

He walks softly into the smaller, more private dining room, about to go further on into the kitchen. He was hungry and not above making his own food, when your hand on his shoulder startles him. 

He jumps, whipping around. 

“I’m so sorry,” You smile kindly, “I didn’t mean to surprise you.” You stroke his cheek, the rapid thump of his heart echoing in your hand. 

“It’s… it’s alright.” He smiles back. Blue was sure there were secret passages in the house, the way you and Anselm always seemed to just appear. Silent and poised. 

You look perfect, growing and radiant and Blue shifts his shoulders a little self consciously, here you were looking like an angel and while he felt like he needed a week in bed. Maybe he was coming down with something. 

“What’s wrong?” You frown a little, your head cocked to the side as if you could read his distress. 

He shakes his head, “Nothing, just hungry.” 

You nod, though you don’t believe him, and guide him to the table. Blue watches you as you move, almost hypnotised by the feel of your hand on his arm, how you seem to glide across the floor. 

You baby him a little as you sit him down and push in his chair while you kiss the top of his head. But he adores it. 

“I’ll speak to the kitchen.” You smile and stroke his jaw, dragging your nails over his stubble. “Is there anything you’re hungry for?” 

“I can make it myself, I don’t want to be a bothe-”

You hush him quickly, bending down and pressing a kiss to his lips. Blue groans softly and tries to follow you when you pull back. Lightly, you tap his nose with your forefinger and he beams at you.

“Is there anything you want to eat?” You repeat, a little firmer this time, but still teasingly kind. 

He bites his lip for a second, “I know it’s early… but…” He relaxes a little when you nod reassuringly. “That port you have, I don’t know why, it’s so nice… maybe a small glass?” 

You grin, “Of course” and kiss his cheek before you leave. 

You move so quickly, seemingly there one second and at the door the next. Blue shakes his head, he really must be tired. 

“And how did my love sleep?” Anselm’s voice makes him jump again, jolting like he’d been hit by an electric current. “I’m sorry, my love.” He smiles, his eyes sparkling. He leans down and kisses Blue on the temple and cheek before he sits next to him. 

“I swear you do that on purpose.” Blue pouts a little and Anselm grins wickedly. It was always the game: a little bratty, bordering on rudeness for Anselm, while he was a good, sweet boy for you. Most of the time. 

“What, my sweet?” 

“Both of you…” Blue huffs, putting it on a little. “Sneak up on me.” Anselm laughs loudly and the sound warms Blue’s heart. “Maybe we do, my love, maybe we like to see your body jump and heart race?” 

Blue hides his smile, “Horrible, both of you.” 

“Now, now,” Anselm leans closer, pressing his mouth up against Blue’s ear. “I don’t think you want to go around throwing that kind of accusation, do you?” 

Blue shivers, his eyes closing ever so slightly as he leans nearer. 

“Or, I’ll show you, my pet. Just how horrible I can be.” He darts out his tongue and lightly licks over the shell of Blue’s ear. 

He lets out the smallest whine, a truly pathetic sound that makes Anselm’s mouth water. 

Anselm takes hold of his jaw and sucks his earlobe into his mouth, biting lightly. 

As you walk back into the room, you’re greeted with a lovely sight. Blue on his knees on the floor between Anselm’s spread legs. His mouth is full, a light gagging echoing off the walls as Anselm guides him by the hand on the back of Blue’s neck, making him take his thick cock deeper and deeper. 

You smile when your husband catches your eye and beams at you. He holds out his hand as you come closer, taking hold of your own and kissing your knuckles softly. 

“Here I was, going to the kitchen to request Blue’s breakfast,” You tease softly, “And you’re already feeding him.” 

Blue whines softly, looking up at you with glassy eyes. 

Anselm tuts, “None of that now,” and pushes him back down, making him swallow more and more of his length until the tip hits the back of his throat. 

Blue gags a little, his hands squeezing Anselm’s still clothed thighs. 

“Breathe through your nose,” Anselm says softly and bucks lightly, pushing past Blue’s resistance to fuck his throat. “I know what you can handle, pet.” 

You sit down next to Anselm, “Don’t push him too hard.” 

He smiles, “And why not?” 

“He hasn’t eaten yet.” You give your husband a playful tap on the shoulder, “He isn’t used to our level of exertion.” 

“Yet.” Anselm’s grin widens, his canines sharp and slightly elongated. 

You scowl him softly, “Getting too excited,” You mutter in his ear. “He needs to eat first.” 

“Hmm,” Anselm runs his left hand up your arm and to your cheek as he turns his head to kiss you gently, while he pushes Blue harshly further down. “You are correct, my love. He hasn’t acclimatised to our rhythm yet.” 

Blue whines desperately, tears in the corners of his eyes as he swallows and gags. His cock twitches, quickly hardening. Both of you speaking to each other like he wasn’t there always did that to him. 

Anselm pulls Blue back by the scruff of his neck like a kitten. Blue gasps, gulping down air, but gives Anselm a cheeky glare. 

You laugh. 

“And what is that for, my love?” Anselm grins.

“I didn’t tap out.” Blue pouts. 

“Hmm,” Anselm pretends to think. “You’re quite right.” He pushes Blue back down, his free hand around his thick cock so he can quickly force his member past Blue’s lips and down his throat. 

Blue yelps, swallowing and groaning. 

“He makes such sweet sounds,” You sigh. 

“Don’t think I don’t see that look, my love.” Your husband tuts playfully as he strokes your arm. 

“What look?” You smile. 

“You’re the one who said he needs to eat first.” Anselm lets a small moan escape his lips, his eyes rolling back. 

“Maybe I need to eat first?” You tease.

“We, fuck,” Anselm swallows, trying his very best to keep his hips still as he slips deeper. “We took quite a bit last night.” 

“Not that much.” You slip down to the floor, flashing a dangerously charming look at your husband. “Besides,” you stroke Blue’s arms and he whines. The vibrations run along Anselm’s cock and he shivers, his hips bucking. “You’re enjoying him right now, you started without me.” 

“I, ah, I apologise, my love.” He lets his head fall back against the chair as Blue swallows and sucks, bobbing his head deliciously. 

Slowly you trail your hands along Blue’s chest, lightly pinching his chest so that he lets out muffled mewls before you shift down and palm his erection softly. 

Blue gasps, a sharp intake of breath in through his nose before he pushes his back against your chest and sucks harder. 

You quickly dip your hand under his trousers and stroke along his heavy cock, grinning when he thrusts weakly and whines. 

You can practically hear the desperation singing in his blood, the need to please both of you buzzing through his flesh like opium. 

You kiss his neck messily, jerking him quickly as he slurps and swallows. Lightly, you just graze the edge of your sharp teeth along his skin. 

Blue jolts, his eyes rolling back. 

Anselm thrusts up hard into his throat, his gaze fixed on the both of you. “Do it, my love, he needs it.” There’s a harsh desperation to his tone, a rasp as he speaks. And you know he needs it more, needs to watch you like an itch begging to be scratched. 

Blue whines, agreeing.

With little warning you bite down, piercing his skin with your teeth. Blood wells up into your mouth, washing over your tongue with the sweetest taste as the warmth runs down your throat. 

You clutch his chest with one hand while the other is a blur on his cock. Blue practically screams around Anselm’s cock, every muscle tensing at once as he comes, spurting all over your hand and his trousers. He shivers, shakes, swallows, whining desperately as he rocks in your firm hold, pleasure exploding along his spine and making him lightheaded. 

Anselm growls, keeping eye contact with you as you feed. He thrusts rapidly, nearly cutting off Blue’s oxygen before snarls and comes down his throat, his cock so deep that Blue has no choice but to swallow. 

You pull your mouth off him, the wound is shallow, barely a scratch. You lick it, lapping at his skin as he slumps forward ever so slightly, breathing hard. 

Blue’s eyes are glazed as you let him rest back against you, tilting his head onto your shoulder. His heartbeat flutters under your hands as he floats, weightless. 

Anselm tuts playfully, as he tucks himself back into his trousers, but leads down when you gesture and kisses you deeply. 

He darts his tongue out when you break apart, licking a small tail of blood that has run down your jaw from your skin. He groans lightly at the taste and smiles.

You easily move Blue back into his seat while he’s still out of it, blissed out and weak, while Anselm goes and gets a small port glass from the drinks cabinet and fills it with a little of the drink. He cuts his forefinger on his teeth before he swirls his finger into the port, letting some of his blood seep out and mix in. At the same moment, you slice your thumb with one fang and smear your blood over the cut on Blue’s neck, the wound heals instantly as if it was never there to begin with. 

Blue makes a small soft sound, blinking hard and you lick the last of your blood from your skin before you kiss him deeply.

Blue moans, iron on his tongue and not understanding from where. One second he was on his knees coming and the next…

“Did I pass out?” He mumbles as you pull back, his eyes bright and voice soft. 

“You did.” You smile, stroking his cheek.

“I’m sorry, I-”

“Don’t be.” You nuzzle against him and smile. “You’re probably just hungry.” 

“Here,” Anselm passes Blue the glass. 

“Thank you.” He says quietly and drinks it down in one gulp, almost instantly the exhaustion starts to leave his limbs, the room looking brighter. “I’m sorr-”

“I don’t want to hear it,” Anselm smiles and kisses his cheek. “I probably cut off some of your air when I came down your throat.” He teases lightly, his voice thick and Blue shivers, squirming a little. His cock twitches. “Already so needy.” Anselm laughs and you giggle. 

Blue heats up a little, but nods. 

“Maybe after your breakfast.” You say and Anselm nods. 

Thank you so much for reading!

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[rejectedfables]

Ghostfuckers watch party aftercare was spent philosophizing lore theories on my couch like ancient greek philosophers, and produced one of my favorite plot theories yet.

The Theory:

The Barbie and Blitz falling out was because Barbie and the Sin of Sloth, Belphegor, were in a toxic relationship with a hefty power imbalance, wherein Belphegor had gotten Barbie hooked on drugs and was (or at least Blitz perceived her to be) toying with Barbie for entertainment. Blitz stepped in to defend/protect Barbie, and Belphegor broke off the relationship, because it wasn't worth the drama. Barbie, who wasn't ready to acknowledge how bad the relationship was, blames Blitz for ruining her life.

The way Blitz saw his own relationship with Stolas was warped by having witnessed Barbie's deeply unhealthy relationship with a Sin who saw her as less than. In an attempt to not fall prey to the same situation he witnessed, Blitz assumed that Stolas saw him how Belphegor saw Barbie.

---

NOTE: this post was made in 11/2024, after Ghostfuckers and before Mastermind

(Evidence below the cut so this post isn't bonkers long like all my other meta posts:)

The Evidence:

Royals:

In their fight during Full Moon, Blitz yells "You royal fucks think you can do this every time!" ("Like you can just play with our feelings because we're smaller and not as important!") at Stolas, but we have no context for what other "royal" he's referencing. The only other Goetia we know Blitz has interacted with (more than tossing out a one-liner at Stella and bolting) was Stolas' father (extremely briefly, over 20 years ago), and Octavia, and it seems like a stretch to believe this could be referencing either of them. Conclusion: Blitz is referencing an experience that we, the audience, don't know about yet. This experience involved someone he considers "a royal", and we most likely haven't encountered them yet on screen.

In Oops Blitz refers to Ozzie as Fizz's "big royal chicken," and in Mammon's Special Blitz refers to him as "royal big man." Conclusion: Sins count as "royal" to Blitz, so the royal referenced in Full Moon could be one of the Sins.

In Oops, Blitz's lines about relationships between a royal and a member of "the lower class" ("I'm sure your big royal chicken ain't gonna let anything happen to his peppy lil fuck doll," and "Stolas only cares about having a rugged peasant raw-dog him into his mattress. […] It's nothing else. […] Stolas […] loves feeling the thrill of getting dicked by the lower class. It's a novelty to him") are startling, given what the audience has seen of Blitz and Stolas' relationship. There are clear ELEMENTS of class difference, but Blitz's vehemence seems excessive. That is, unless he's projecting a past experience onto this situation.

If Blitz were referencing a Goetia, it seems odd that we haven't heard anything about his experience with Goetia from his past. He refers to Stolas as "THE bird." It's possible, but seems unlikely to me.

If Blitz is referencing a Sin, there's only 7 options. Ozzie, Bee, Mammon, and Lucifer all seem off the table for different reasons (the first three because we've seen his interactions with them, and they didn't seem loaded in this way; Lucifer because, well, Amazon owns the rights to Lucifer and I think it would be tough to explore this in the way I think this show wants to without the relevant character making an appearance). Satan seems unlikely, given that Blitz uses his name very casually as a swear, and has never reacted to it being said in any noticeable way. This leaves Leviathan and Belphegor as the top suspects for who Blitz could have been referencing/has a history with.

However, IF Blitz has a personal history with another royal, such as has an ex or an ex boss, who has had such a dramatic impact on his expectations and worldview, why has that person not shown up in either of his hallucination sequences (depicting first "truth bombs" Blitz had been avoiding facing, in Truth Seekers, then his insecurities in Ghostfuckers)? I think the most likely explanation is that this royal who he witnessed playing with an imp's feelings was not actually playing with BLITZ. He was deeply affected by witnessing someone ELSE experience a dynamic that he has now projected onto his relationship with Stolas.

Barbie and Blitz:

It would be redundant to rehash the fire with Barbie after doing so with Fizz. It seems like tired storytelling to have her issues with Blitz be the same as Fizz's were, even with a side of "You killed our mom!" baked in.

If Blitz's self loathing and sense that he ruins the lives of everyone around him were only/mostly sourced to the fire, they wouldn't be so compounded. In order to feel the way he does, he has been blamed for "ruining the lives" of his loved ones repeatedly, not just by multiple people at one time for one event.

In Unhappy Campers Barbie defaults to calling Blitz "Blitz" without the O, and only uses the O later when she's trying to be mean. This implies that she had a relationship with Blitz AFTER he decided to change his name (after the fire), and knows him AS Blitz, and therefore that their falling out was about something that happened later.

In Unhappy Campers, she says "Haven't you fucked up my life enough already?" which feels more pointed than just being about the loss of their mother.

The forehead marks that most members of the Circus had seem to be difficult to get rid of (Fizz's was unaffected by the burn, and he covers his to this day rather than getting rid of it somehow). This could simply be a tattoo, or it could be because they're magical in some way. If they are, for example, a symbol of the Circus having been owned/run by one of the Sins, it would be notable that Barbie appears to be the only person who has successfully affected hers, and that she's done so by having it crossed out with little hearts above and below it. Possibly only a sin has the power to overwrite whatever those marks are, and if so, the little hearts might be a sign of the type of relationship she had with that Sin. (This point is a little dubious, since the poster of them working together appears to be BEFORE the fire, as Blitz doesn't have his scars yes, but AFTER she's crossed out her mark already. This could just be an inconsistency from an early episode, could mean this detail is unrelated, could be a point against my theory, or it COULD imply that the relationship with Belphegor started quite early.)

Drugs:

Almost all references to drugs in the show are sourced through Belphegor. Bee references "Belphegor's party drugs," The hospitals are in the Sloth ring, and Stolas' happy pills are from Belphegor (her name's right on the label). On Blitz's phone, there's 7 apps themed after the 7 Sins, and the Sloth one (Belphegor) is called "Sleepy Pillz".

"H8", the drug Blitz was afraid that Barbie was back on, and therefore probably what she went to rehab to get off of, is an irl opioid that is multiple times stronger than morphine. This would make a lot of sense as being a drug one could acquire from the Sin of Sloth, who is in charge of the ring of Hell where all the hospitals are.

Barbie being in rehab means either BLITZ is paying for her rehab, or that someone else is paying (seems unlikely as we aren't given the impression she has a support network at this point), or that Belphegor herself simply approved the expense.

Other details:

Belphegor is a woman and Barbie was depicted in pride month merch with the pan flag colors, so Barbie being in a romantic/sexual relationship with a woman is viable.

In the 11/12/24 holiday merch drop, in the main set of matching art pieces (used for clothes and mugs), Barbie was the ONLY one with candles in her theming. The baphomets (the demon species from Belphegor's domain) have candles on their foreheads, and the dubiously canon placeholder official art we've seen of Belphegor also has a candle on her forehead. Merch art doesn't necessarily mean anything, and should not be considered canon (nor should the placeholder art), but it COULD be a subtle nod to plot events to come. This is not actually evidence. Unless?

We are getting, so far, two Sins introduced per season-- Ozzie and Bee in s1, Mammon and Satan in s2, which leaves Leviathan and Belphegor for s3. Vivzie has said that we ARE getting more Barbie Wire in the show, but not until later in season 3, which COULD align Barbie's reintroduction into the story with Belphegor's introduction.

---

This isn't a headcanon, but rather a possible direction I think the show could go, which would have been subtly foreshadowed if it does go in this direction.

[more-than-a-princess]

Sonia shrugged, more out of unawareness than boredom. Just the prospect of riding a roller coaster was enough to make her smile: the speeds, the drops, the turns, the loops! Feeling like she was flying with every possibility for danger. She wouldn't deny that she was partly influenced by Final Destination 3 (one of the best of the series, of course). "I suppose so, if simply because I shall forfeit plenty of money to ride as many as possible! Again and again!" Years of being denied trips to amusement parks had taken their toll: if a mall or, say, even a hotel had a roller coaster in them, Sonia would make it a point to visit.

She blushed at his words though, unable to stop the heat blooming over her cheeks as he shared his feelings with her. As he'd done the night before, and she had yet to tire of it. She had a hunch she never would, her heart skipping a beat in both affection and anticipation. A quick cursory glance in the men's shoe department and then she was up on her tiptoes, pressing a soft, quick kiss to Wylan's lips.

"Sometimes it is prudent to act first and ask for forgiveness later, or you may never truly live at all," She told him gently after lowering herself to the ground, her gaze never leaving his. "You taught me that, you know. Setting off on an adventure, no matter how big or small. It could be as simple as an arcade in Tokyo or as complicated as distracting my handlers and smuggling me onto a commercial plane bound for Las Vegas. I have loved them all, and you."

There was so much to him that she loved, even his warning that he'd get handsy if they kept this up. She grinned, a step ahead of him in that regard: her hand had reached out for his, entwining their fingers. That was one hand occupied, exactly where she wanted it. "Vegas is near the top of the list," She agreed, "But I think the more pressing adventure is one for coffee and clean clothes. Thankfully this 'cathedral of capitalism,' as you call it, has both: though the former is best in the other building. Come on, I'll show you."

Sonia navigated the floors of the men's store with ease, perhaps too much ease. If asked though, she'd explain that she often helped her cousins pick out things when their paths crossed in Paris and neither of them wanted to suffer the 'approved' tailors for fear of looking boring and stuffy. But she led them up several floors and through the contemporary menswear department to a bridge crossing over a side street. "To more easily access the main building," She explained as they crossed, smiling as they entered the largest of the three department stores: the womens and gift building. The grandest, too: Sonia glanced up for a moment at the stained glass dome in the large atrium at the center, all the floors arranged in a circular pattern around it, before leading him along to another elevator bank, taking to the highest floor it reached: a luxury gift hall, cafeteria, cafe, and, of all things, an ice cream parlor.

"You can buy expensive French chocolate, coffee, and tea to take with you, but I think purchasing a hot drink or an ice cream is best," Sonia advised, though she led the way to the counter service cafe. "There is a flight of stairs leading up to The Terrace from this floor: I thought a coffee with one of the best views of Paris would be a nice way to start the morning." Or give him an idea of what it would take to scale the outside of one of the oldest department stores in Paris. She wouldn't put it past him: either way, it would be entertaining.

"Are roller coasters capitalism?" He ponders as an immediate thought. In his eyes, selling overpriced commodities based on brand titles felt a better bill. At least as far as the stereotypes went. But on that logic, walking into an Apple or Dyson store could quite fit the bill. Not that he cares. He's American. And everything that came with it, a direct contrast to everything that came with Sonia. To many, these were things that distinctly UNamerican.

"...I really do love you." Wylan observes, helpless but to fondly stare into Sonia's eyes after she's done with her request. Just in time for them to hit the end of an escalator and continue their way. Sonia in Wylan's arms. Every opportunity he had to keep her close, listen to her voice in his ear as they walked in tandem. "We haven't even made it twenty four hours past confessing right and good to each other and you're suggesting I abduct you all over again." The snort escapes, but whether she meant it or not it was uplifting. Endearing. Perhaps it was a sign that becoming 'official' with Sonia wouldn't change all that much after all?

This trip was a small piece of that. Here they were going shopping on a whim to get some more fitting clothes and they hadn't stopped a moment to let anyone know of it. They simply did. And their keepers did their best to keep up. Wylan can't help but make eye contact with one or two every now and then.

"I want to see the world with you, Sonia. So if you want to start with Vegas. Do it right. That's perfect. As long as I get to see your reactions to everything, then I have no complaints. Even when it's something or someplace you don't care for you go and find a way to ... appreciate it? Understand it? I rarely ever meet people like that." A pause to make way for the small accompanying realization. "But then half my life was working to remove those issues from people's lives. So." Wylan makes a dramatic shrug and lift of his expression while squeezing his lips. Maybe that makes sense.

"Okay. I'm getting distracted, and if that keeps up I'm gonna get handsy. This place has gotta have a map. Like an app or something." Eyes flit around, then back to Sonia. "Purely for navigational reasons I swear. I'm not planning anything else. Yet. Also. We need to find a place to get that coffee. I thought I saw some cafes listed on a directory."

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

why does every critically acclaimed show or movie have to have women being sexually degraded or constantly with their tits out or stripping or being prostituted, when will the men start bending over and do long ass scenes with their ass shaking or whatever

[lbhslefttiddie]

"Shen Jiu, you really are a demon!"

in which yue qi saves an injured fox kit, which turns out to be an young fox demon. once he's recovered enough strength, he adopts a human form so that he can talk to yue qi properly, but ends up being caught by the slave traders as well. Since he can change form, it would be pretty easy for him to escape, but if he's discovered as a demon he'll never be able to return, and he has no home or family anyways, so he decides he would rather stay and help qi-ge, who will probably get himself killed without someone to stop him from doing stupid shit.

when shen jiu saves yue qi from death by horse carriage, and subsequently is bought by qiu jianluo, fairly quickly qjl realizes he is not human, and delightedly gifts him with a enchanted collar, which renders him unable to chnage forms, stuck in him demonic form and unable to change to full fox or full human shape. like this, he cannot leave the qiu manor at all without immediately giving himself away, even if qjl hadnt also locked him up. like this, he has no choice but to wait until yq makes his way back to the qiu manor at last, but when he's finally freed, he's initially almost feral from how he's been treated, and very nearly kills yqy...

[fideidefenswhore]

the tudors (2007-2010) / wolf hall (2009) / henry viii & the king's men (2020) / eustace chapuys to the emperor (june 1535) / the other boleyn girl (2008) / the downfall and execution of a tudor queen (2023) / eustace chapuys to the emperor (april 1536) / henry viii, stratford festival production (2019) / wolf hall (2009) / elizabeth i & her enemies (2017) / the mirror & the light (2020) / becoming elizabeth (2022) / the mirror & the light (2020) / the tudors (2007-2010) / the mirror & the light (2020) / the tudors (2007-2010)

[catboyfurina]

focalette / neuvalors whatever the ship name is orz

[sporesgalaxy]

i shouldve played pokemon violet in spanish....

[littlest-nightingale]

Being compared to your abuser bc of autism is fun 🫠