#enneagram playlist

[captainfairygodmother]

Is it just me or is Eight by Sleeping At Last just Painland/maybe more Charles?

[playlistbyjo]

a playlist for all the campaigners out there😌✨

[redstringraven]

an excruciatingly long ramble about the ‘03 turtles and the enneagram 🐢💙 pt3

[ intro + disclaimers post ] [ pt 2 - raph ] [ pt 4 - don ] [ pt 5 - mikey ]

leo, 1 with a 2 wing

intro

to reiterate some things i said in raph’s post, where i believe raph starts the series at his lowest point, leo ends the series (in terms of this project) at his lowest point. leo seems to be in his healthiest state in seasons 1 and 2, which will be reflected in the security section of this post, and the first half of season 4 is when we see him at his worst. while i wish we’d gotten to see more of a ‘full arc’ for each of the boys, i’m glad we at least got to see it for one.

speaking of ‘one’ (haha, segue!), let’s take a quick look at a 1's basics. i’ll be following the same format i did for raph’s post, so feel free to revisit his should you need a refresher on terms.

bare basics of the 1

1s are one of the three compliant types (along with 2s and 6s), and they’re members of the gut triad (made of 8s, 9s and 1s).

i realized shortly after publishing raph’s post that i never explained what i meant by him being an 'assertive type', and it’s as i bring up leo that i realize i should have elaborated a bit. if you’re reading these as i publish them, it’s now been added in this section of raph’s post.

when i say that 1s are 'compliant types', i mean that they’re people who move toward others. they like to be of service to the people around them. this isn’t to say they’re blindly compliant in a literal sense to other people, more so that they feel the need to obey internalized rules, principles and other dictates they’ve learned in their childhoods.

as previously mentioned, members of the gut triad seek autonomy and they’re concerned with control of their environment and resistance. 8s externalize it, 9s forget it, and 1s internalize it.

a 1’s basic fear is of being ‘bad’; defective, evil, or corrupt

their basic desire is to be good, in balance, and virtuous; to have integrity

they believe they’ll be okay so long as what they do is right.

childhood take-aways

we return to the quote from master splinter at the start of things change (s1ep1):

“your path in life will not be an easy one. the outside world will not be a friendly place for you. you four are different in ways the surface dwellers would never understand. to survive, you must master these skills i teach you: the powers of stealth and secrecy. you must become kage, shadow warriors, and you must never be discovered by the outside world.”

i think it could go without saying that the turtles’ lives as kids had to’ve been chaotic from the word ‘go’.

you’ve got master splinter single-parenting four boys (all while dealing with his own grief and newfound human-level intelligence), having to hide from the rest of the city’s population, living in the sewers with limited resources, knowing that you’ve only got each other because the surface dwellers will never accept you, the reason you’re even learning ninjitsu is so that one day--should you ever be discovered--you’re capable of defending yourself, the list goes on.

additionally, in attack of the mousers (s1ep3) when master splinter states that april knowing they exist puts them in great danger, leo points out that she was in danger. raph then asks master splinter “yeah, aren’t you always teachin' us to try and do the right thing?”.

from this we learn that on top of teaching the boys ninjitsu, splinter is teaching them morals. you could argue that this is obvious since they’re aware of the concept of ‘honor’, but i think it’s important to distinguish that this is an unwarped version of ‘honor’ (karai is an example of that, but we’ll get to her). they’re not only being taught how to survive and protect themselves, but they're learning the differences in right and wrong in ways that extend beyond themselves and their own needs or goals. when it comes to leo and his 1 this is important to keep in mind.

in a similar way to 8s, 1s often grow up too quickly. young 1s might respond to chaotic conditions around them by becoming hyper-responsible or taking the place of the voice of reason in their families. they develop a sense of seriousness and adult responsibility at an early age. they understand that their parents (their ‘protective figure’) expect a lot from them, and it’s not uncommon for them to take on those expectations earnestly. this allows them to establish some sense of autonomy and boundaries--both of which are important to their type.

1s as children will often try to surpass what is expected of them by adhering to self-inflicted rules so rigorously that no one will be able to catch them in error. this will earn them their independence. they feel they have to come up with a better set of rules for themselves than that of their protective-figure, so they will be capable of deciding what is right or wrong.

leo seems to acknowledge his need not just for order in his profile, but also the need to make up for any ‘slack’ left by his brothers. he states that he’s not trying to be perfect, just ‘perfectly proficient’.

…leonardo, my love, i’m gonna give you a chance to hear yourself say that again. this isn’t only alliteration, it’s also synonymous.

leo can be seen practicing ninjitsu outside of ‘normal training’ at least once every season, something we rarely see his brothers doing (raph exercises, mikey will sometimes 'train' but it seems more like raph or a brother was looking for a sparring partner and mikey isn't taking it seriously, and don almost never trains in his free time).

in meet casey jones (s1ep4) he’s practicing his split-kick. at the start of city at war (s2ep14) he’s trying to do the whole… spinny-stab the target thing. he’s the one training at the start of the time scepter episodes (his episode being s3ep22), whereas his brothers are engaging in their individual interests. there are multiple examples to pull from in season four, but i think the example that speaks blatantly to the 1’s need to not just meet their expectations but to surpass them is found in the ancient one (s4ep14). he demands of master splinter “when are you going to teach me something i don’t already know”. this is, however, a bit complicated as it occurs when leo's in his most unhealthy state.

we've seen in flashbacks, specifically mikey's from tales of leo (s1ep19) that leo has always taken ninjitsu and his training seriously (and, we can assume, those lessons in morality and honor). he feels he needs to surpass splinter’s expectations, as well as pick up the ‘slack’ from his brothers. looking back to his official profile, he states "i must be there to compensate for their lack of focus".

i feel the need to quickly point out that don, mikey, and raph pursuing interests outside of ninjitsu is NOT "bad". through the mind of a 1, however, these 'distractions' might keep them from meeting what's expected of them. not being able to meet expectations is 'bad'.

1s need to be good. if no one else will do it, they step up to the plate. even if it's not what they want to do, they believe it's what they should do. what they need to do.

leo as a 1

1s can sometimes be nicknamed: ‘the perfectionist’, ‘the reformer’, ‘the idealist’, ‘the judge’, ‘the critic’, or ‘the motivator’.

an ‘average’ 1, in terms of mental and spiritual health, can be described as having a judging or comparing mind that is almost magnetically pulled to notice errors and imperfections. they struggle to accept that mistakes are inevitable, that perfection is an unreachable bar, and they fear the tyranny of their critical inner voice. because, and i cannot stress this enough, where Pinocchio might have had a nice little cricket as his voice of reason and consciousness, 1s have a critic that perches on their shoulder just beside their ear and points out every little thing ‘wrong’ around or with them. in attempting to create their own brand of perfection, they’ll cultivate their own hell instead.

1s believe that being strict with themselves and achieving self-discipline will justify themselves in the eyes of those around them, as well as in themselves (and you need to remember that word: justify). neatness and order are often comforting to 1s; it makes them feel safe and less anxious.

1s want to be good people. they always want to do ‘the right thing’. should a stranger on a stormy night board a bus and express need for warm food and shelter, any 1 aboard that bus would believe it was their responsibility to ensure that person received proper care and safety; it’s the correct, responsible thing to do, and we should all expect it of ourselves.

i always get profoundly sad whenever i see people harping on leo in the 03 series or saying that his personality is just ‘the leader’ or that he’s boring. 1s are more than capable of being goofy, sarcastic, and playful--and we see leo tap into this part of him several times throughout the series! but that inner critic, the voice in their head warning them not to be caught slipping up, can be deafening more often than not. due to the nature of the series, we only really get to see the turtles "in a situation", NOT during downtime. leo's 1 has to be engaged... someone has to be taking things seriously, after all.

it's also important to note that being responsible, doing what’s expected of them (be it the expectations of others or of themselves), is one of the ways that 1s say “I love you”. they may not vocalize this often, nor be the most physically affectionate, but a hug from a 1 comes in many other forms. you just have to pay attention. an example from one of my books is to imagine what may have happened in your neighborhood during a major storm. after it blew over, your house was the only one with power and heat because your parent, who is a 1, bought a back-up generator years earlier and regularly checked to make sure it was properly serviced and fueled. that’s a hug from a 1. they’ll keep track of your doctor’s appointments, they’ll find ways to make life work on a budget, do whatever they can to make the world a more comfortable and secure place for you.

returning to leo’s 03 profile, he states that he trains diligently and reads up on strategy to better prepare himself and his family for times of stress. since this is a way that 1s express their love, it’s no wonder that the events of exodus damaged leo as much as they did; him 'not being capable or prepared enough' keep his family safe means that he fell short in more ways than just skill or ability. what if they start to think he didn’t love them enough to do more?

leo’s relationship with karai throughout the series can really underline his 1 and his need to maintain his integrity as well as do what’s right. there are multiple instances where choosing to do nothing would have removed her from the chess board: letting her deal with the fallout of her plan in city at war (s2ep16), from saving her from falling to her death in be-jing (s3ep15) to going out of his way to save her in hun on the run (s3ep18) despite the protests of his brothers, to--once again--catching her from falling to her death in exodus part 2 (s3ep26).

karai even remarks in that episode of exodus that he’s “much too kind”. (you’re goddamn right he is, this boy has a fear of heights and you’re constantly falling from shit, yet he snatches you out of the air anyway even at the risk of his own safety tf).

1s with 2 wings are sometimes nicknamed ‘the advocates’. average-health 1s of this subtype are active and outgoing people. they are comfortable being alone, and do require a good deal of “down time” to recharge and think, they’re energized by engaging with others and refining their ideas. when on the healthier side of a 2, they can be quite extroverted, helpful and empathetic. under the influence of a 2, these 1s are more sensitive to the needs of those around them. on the low side of a 2, however, they can be more critical and controlling. they feel strongly that they need to make a difference and try to accomplish too many tasks in one day, and they can be much more fiery and action-oriented than 1w9s.

healthier 1w2s can blend their quest for ideals and higher principles with higher empathy and compassion for others. they’re genuinely interested in improving mankind and are more willing to get into the trenches to bring about the changes they seek. people of this subtype are persuasive and go out of their way to get others to care about the causes and beliefs they do.

i didn't do this with raph since don and mikey will serve as explanations for the thinking triad, but we don't have any turtles whose core type is on the feeling triad. since leo and don both have wings in the feeling triad, let's do just a little briefing here while we're on the subject of leo's 2 wing.

types in the feeling triad (2s, 3s, and 4s) are concerned with love of a 'false self' and their self-image. they seek attention and have issues with identity and hostility, and often times they struggle with an underlying feeling of shame. 2s focus outwardly on the feelings of others; they need to feel needed. leo may not have a 2 as a core number, but having a 2 wing means he's often influenced by that type.

stress & security numbers

leo’s stress number is 4; he'll begin to adopt negative traits associated with 4s when stressed or in an unhealthy state of mind.

that inner critic gets louder and louder, and the 1's desire to ‘fix’ the things around them goes into overdrive. they can become resentful toward those around them for having fun, become sensitive to criticism and will often become depressed. they may even begin to feel unlovable.

in times of heightened stress, 1s might not only lean into the 4’s habit of daydreams and fantasies, longing to be free from the things they consider their obligations and responsibilities, but their inner critic will ridicule them for it. they’ll begin to have profound feelings of guilt and shame, they'll garner an even deeper resolve to hold those desires at bay and deny themselves things that could bring them happiness and peace. they’ll begin to believe that no one understands them or sees how hard they’re working. they’ll grow moody, melancholic and withdrawn. all that discipline and self-control will collapse into frustrated feelings of envy and resentment. it could lead to emotional outbursts and hostility, and should they be questioned about it they’ll only become more self-conscious and self-controlled. when a 1 finally blows a valve, someone almost always gets burned.

some examples of leo’s 4 showing up are:

his frustration toward splinter at the beginning of the shredder strikes (s1ep10)

multiple expressions of hopelessness and sadness about getting home to master splinter throughout the space arc (s2ep1-4); raph is often the one assuring HIM

his nightmare throughout darkness within (s3ep14) and how it potentially, if you squint, ties into his apology to master splinter at the end of exodus (s3ep26) when he says he failed him; that nightmare came true

…do i even need to mention anything from the first half of season four, or do we just already know

leo’s security number is 7; in a healthier state of mind and spirit, he takes on the positive traits of a 7.

similarly to how don and raph have common ground beneath the surface, i think leo and mikey shake hands on that front as well. which just makes me all the more feral about mikey having leo’s back in the first half of season four. leo’s security number being a 7 means that mikey’s stress number is a 1. whether mikey knows it or not, i think this link helps him connect with leo easier than don and raph can (this isn’t so say they can’t, of course, just that it comes a little more natural for mikey).

as we’ll cover in mikey’s post, 7s are much more perceptive than people assume they are. mikey not only knew leo was struggling with the weight of his self-assigned responsibility, i think he understood it on a deeper level.

in a healthier state, the 1’s inner critic will get quieter. they become more self-accepting, fun, spontaneous, and willing to try new things. they’re more curious and optimistic, more able to relate to the perspectives of others. they learn to relax their guard, allowing themselves be affected by reality (to go with the flow) without needing to tense against it.

it’s as they learn to distinguish themselves from the voice of their inner critic that a 1 will begin to experience the qualities of a healthy 7: open-mindedness, curiosity, enthusiasm and joy. “there is a crack in everything; that’s how the light gets in”.

some examples of leo’s 7 coming to the surface are:

the “your reign of terror is OVER, stockman” in attack of the mousers (s1ep3)

telling a foot ninja they don’t take kindly to shop-lifters in a museum (s1ep6)

throwing a vehicle-chair at a triceraton whilst telling them they look tired and should have a seat (s2ep2)

giving raph fucking SPOONS for weapons (s2ep3)… the absolute mad lad, he really said “here lmfao” and gave his brother soup utensils to fight 8 foot dinosaurs. for the meme. an entire utility closet of potential weapons… and he gave the boy spoons. because he knew he’d be fine.

letting casey sweat while enemy GUNS were actively pointed at him in the golden puck (s2ep18) jesus christ

the rooftop race with raph in touch and go (s3ep8) and telling him to “step it up, sNAIL BOY”

leo’s 7 surfacing will never not make me violently affectionate toward him. every silly quip and one-liner and bad pun and terrible impression of professor honeycutt (s3ep5), like, bye, i need to sign the adoption papers immediately. it’s not easy for him. and i love that there’s almost always an awkward quality to it because he’s out of his element--he’s letting himself be… stupid. imperfect. lame, even. and, god, is it cute. i’m so endeared. i gotta lie down.

cardinal sins - 1 and anger

while the 1’s cardinal sin might be ‘wrath’ or ‘anger’, a truer word to their experiences is ‘resentment’.

their anger is directed both at themselves for failing to live up to their ideals and expectations as well as at others for what 1s see as laziness and irresponsibility. this could be anything from a classmate not pulling their weight on an assignment to someone 'breaking the rules' at a checkout line (this line is for ten items and under, you clearly have thirteen).

as 1s become less healthy, they begin to displace their anger onto others as they make themselves the only judge of who is right or wrong; they grow more irritable with others as they seem to be getting off the hook without consequence. they often will feel that those around them aren’t taking an equal share of the responsibility and seem to be having all the fun. but, unlike an 8 who chooses anger in place of what they're really feeling, 1s don't want you to know they're angry. because being angry is 'bad'.

where 8s externalize their anger and 9s try to forget it, 1s will hide theirs away beneath the surface, where it will begin to express itself to everyone around them in smoldering resentment.

anger is often a secondary emotion; it’s a way of resisting an attack on our integrity and--when fully experienced--it is instantaneous and short-lived. however, when we resist it or hang onto it, it cultivates into obsessive thinking, emotional constriction and physical tension. 1s, seeing anger as something ‘bad’, will experience their anger without identifying it as such. they’ll deny their anger, stating things like “i’m not angry, i’m just trying to get it right” or “i’m not mad, i just don’t understand”.

in short, leo would be that dad who tells you he’s not mad, he’s just disappointed. [everybody disliked that]

1s will also often try to find a cause or a reason in order to justify their anger; something they can fight but in a way that is ‘good’. that way their anger ‘makes sense’ and isn’t 'selfish', they’re angry for a good reason, and they have something to act on.

i think we get our first real glimpse of leo’s cardinal sin as early as the shredder strikes (s1ep10). master splinter tells him that if doesn't learn there is no 'superior weapon' and that ANY weapon can be deadly in the right hands, then he will have learned nothing. leo then goes topside to blow off steam. and while verbally expressing his frustration--sorry, i mean confusion, he's not MAD he just doesn't get why he's 'in trouble' when his skill is the best it's ever been--he slices up a pack of helpless newspapers who were just minding their own business.

resentment is described as “bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly”; in leo’s mind, he thinks master splinter is treating him unfairly. telling him that despite all his training and all the work he’s put into ninjitsu that if he doesn’t understand the value of a weapon is in its wielder he’s learned NOTHING. "master splinter just doesn’t understand how important these swords are to me!". that’s a bit of leo’s 4 showing through: no one gets it, no one understands me.

as we mentioned with raph, i’d like to also take a look at the other cardinal sins attached to leo’s core type. his 2 wing, stress 4 and security 7 would give him pride, envy, and gluttony respectively.

city at war

ah shit… here we go again.gif

we talked about the build up to city at war in raph’s post, so i don’t think we need to do that a second time here. both because… none of the facts and details of the timeline change with the shift in perspective, and because that history leading into the events of city at war don’t necessarily influence leo’s 1. the most important connection when it comes to leo is the fact that the major players in the city are in a turf war because the balance of power is now unstable.

leo’s seeing the effects this power struggle has on the city--and the innocent people living in it--and his 1 can’t help but draw a thick, red line from ‘we killed shredder’ to ‘we caused this and this is our fault’.

he tells master splinter that he’s confused in s2ep14; he thought things would change for the better after they defeated the shredder, but they seem to only be getting worse. he states “don’t ask me to explain how, but it feels like our fault”. and WHO understands what he’s talking about?? mikey. the other turtle with a 1 connected to his type; he's engaging with his stress number while raph leans fully into his 5.

leo decides to directly disobey master splinter, stating that he CAN’T do ‘nothing’. it wouldn’t be right to just shrug and turn a blind eye to this.

and i just have to point out… for pete’s fucking sake, boy’s about to throw himself into a building of foot ninja. ALONE. after just last season facing them and almost DYING because of it. he’s about to put himself through that trauma all over again--WILLINGLY--because he just... can’t shake this feeling that this whole thing is their fault. they have a direct connection to this domino effect as far as he's concerned, and it's his responsibility to fix it. SOMEONE has to.

we’ll never know if the turtles’ involvement up until karai’s appearance in new york actually did help or if it just added more fuel to the fire, but i think leo in a lot of ways would have been doomed to just keep digging his heels in and trying to 'help'. because as things would get worse, it would just solidify his worries even more.

we can’t even really determine if helping karai was the best move because her plan BASICALLY failed, and they only made it out of there alive because raph and master splinter showed up with the element of surprise. once again, there’s too many moving parts, too complicated of a situation to play the “what if” game, everyone was stupid and lucky. mikey’s not wrong when he says karai’s plan kinda stank.

…speaking of.

i guess we should talk about karai

yeah, you can’t really talk about 03 leo without acknowledging his relationship with karai. i’m not gonna dwell on this too much, because this post ain’t about her, but for full disclosure karai is one of those characters i very much want to like but… girl. stop it. get some help.

karai tests leo’s 1 in a lot of ways. we meet her, of course, in city at war (s2ep15). it’s kind of an unsettling return to the shredder strikes in an odd sense, as leo is once again given the offer to join forces with the foot (only with the illusion of grandeur swept away). this time around, it’s not only in the hopes of giving balance back to the city and its inhabitants, but also an olive branch between the foot and his own family. no revenge for the shredder's destruction.

because you know. he's totally dead. ...totally.

buuuuut. rogue in the house (s2ep19) happens. rest in peace, zog. the foot have very much NOT kept their word, as the boys intercept a fake master splinter meant to expose and destroy them from the inside. karai is tasked with killing the turtles herself as proof of her loyalty toward the shredder (and that warped sense of 'honor' meaning she's bound to serve him). and when confronted with this she even kind of blames leo for the position she's put in, stating she wished he wouldn't have come here [taylor swift's look what you made me do playing in the distance]. like... sweetheart, darling, gravy, we wouldn't be here if y'all hadn't offended our dad by trying to kill us with his likeness!

leo gives her the option to do the right thing and let him live, and she does. at the end of part two (s2ep20) she doesn’t report them having survived the ship sinking.

i can’t help but wonder if leo sees himself in karai (this is not me saying karai is a 1, mind you).

like, in the sense that ch’rell almost tricked him into joining the foot, ch’rell took her under his wing when she was young. only... she didn’t have a family to pull her out of the illusion and bring her back to reality. when you’re looking through rose-tinted glasses, all the red flags just look like flags. no one was there to help karai take hers off after ch’rell took her in. she still thinks she’s fighting that greater evil instead of realizing that she's fighting alongside that great evil.

and leo keeps getting glimpses that she knows something’s wrong. be it sparing his life and not reporting them in rogue in the house, thanking him at the end of hun on the run (s3ep18), or knowing that shredder’s actions are putting the citizens of be-jing in great danger (s3ep15), it’s clear she has SOME moral compass buried under everything ch’rell has taught her and lead her to believe.

the 1 in him can’t abandon her. it wouldn’t be the right thing to do to turn his back on her when there are still signs she can be helped. so he keeps extending her that hand. he keeps trying to get through to her and lower the bridge. until she finally burns it down, herself, when she tries to wipe out his family in scion of the shredder (s4ep15).

i know she gets a bit of a redemption arc in s5, but... as stated in my disclaimer post, the majority of my attention and weight is given to seasons 1-4. frankly, i feel the damage is done. karai’s doubled down, and leo’s resentment toward her--for allowing herself to become no different than ch’rell, for going back on her word personally (the shredder is gone and she's no longer 'honor-bound' to his orders) and trying to kill his family herself--is going to be a hard, hard thing to mend.

it's sad. i say that genuinely.

the first half of season four and… yeah

so back in raph’s post i listed some words to describe 8s at their healthiest and at their unhealthiest. let’s take a look at 1s.

1s, at their healthiest, can be described as accepting and wise. evaluating, reasonable, principled and responsible. but at their unhealthiest, they can become self-righteous and inflexible. obsessive and contradictory. condemnatory and punitive. the first half of season four is just a slow, painful spiral of watching leo becoming more and more withdrawn, more self-punishing, and more angry.

things start relatively ‘light’.

in cousin sid (s4ep1) through sons of the silent age (s4ep3), leo’s less angry and more just… distant and sad. this is like the calm before the storm. we see him disengaged a lot, not really paying attention to the conversation around him and often times staring at his own reflection. his 4’s habit of slipping into daydreams and wallowing in melancholy has him stewing over the events of exodus--replaying them again and again in his head as his inner critic scrambles to point out everything he did wrong and invent what he “should” have done. he even says this himself to april, that he can’t stop thinking about it. that no matter how he tries to rationalize or, quote, “JUSTIFY” it, he wasn’t good enough. remember what i said back in the earlier sections of this post? 1s feel the need to justify themselves in the eyes of those around them, as well as in themselves. leo can't find a way to do this with how exodus played out. he wasn't prepared enough. he wasn't good enough.

dragon’s brew (s4ep4) is where the calm ends and the storm begins. we start the episode off with casey confusing leo for raph. leo’s anger is starting to bubble, but his 1 doesn’t allow him to just sit there and be angry. because being angry is not ‘good’. so, we gotta do something with that anger in order to justify feeling it. …oh, look. there’s been a lot of crime lately. could be a new threat. don’t like that. …who can i snoop around with who won’t ask questions? who won’t try to get in my way if i get a little excessive with burning off this not-anger i feel?

casey.

problem is, like we mentioned earlier in the cardinal sin section, anger is only short-lived when you allow yourself to feel it and let it go. when you try to smother it--try to put it away and call it something else--it contorts into something worse. as master splinter said in s1ep4, “rage is a monster that will destroy you from within”.

… …foreshadowing is a literary device wh--

grudge match (s4ep6) is where the storm is here, and now there's resistance to it. like i said in raph’s post, this is where raph first confronts leo on his change in attitude, albeit master splinter interrupts this. at this point, mikey seems to be the only one connecting dots. like i’d said, his type having connection to a 1 might make understanding leo come more naturally to him than to raph or don or even master splinter.

we get, just… a great bit of dialogue here when looking at them from an enneagram lens.

leo: …no. like pushing yourself beyond your limits. to a place where there are no limits. to be so focused, so ready that nothing and no one will ever catch you off guard again! mikey: um. …we still talking about me, here?

this exchange is great for two key reasons:

(one) you’ll remember what i said in the childhood section of this post about 1s adhering to self-inflicted rules so rigorously that no one else will be able to catch them in error, and

(two) that mikey IMMEDIATELY realizes leo is projecting. he just doesn’t address it directly because that’s not how 7s operate with heavy or hard topics (we’ll get to that).

leo continues to either reframe or relabel his anger and obsessive training into something else during bad day (s4ep8). he describes it as ‘doing what he has to to keep this family safe’, despite that master splinter is giving him one hell of a side-eye and radiating sure, jan energy.

in dragons rising (s4ep10) the boiling point is on the horizon. leo lashes out at his brothers, verbally, reprimanding them for taking everything 'too lightly'. they only stopped HALF of the dragons. they need to stop treating ‘this’ like it’s all a game.

in samurai tourist (s4ep13), we get to see mikey once again being the most empathetic and understanding of leo’s current mindset, directly pointing out that leo often "picks up their slack" so they can do whatever they want. things are bad enough that master splinter has reached out to usagi as an effort to get through leo's walls. usagi almost… ALMOST gets through to him.

he’s been in something similar to leo’s position, understands and empathizes with the rationale of self-blame. for the first time, leo’s talking to someone he admires and looks up to who is ALSO on common ground with him. you could argue that master splinter should be able to fill this role, but if i may point out two things: not only is usagi more a peer than he is protector or mentor or parent, but splinter was also just a normal rat when he was unable to protect yoshi... i doubt leo would want to listen to that be given the same weight.

leo's even about to open up when they’re interrupted. that interruption leads into a fight with an assassin… a fight that, unfortunately, only seems to affirm how leo feels about needing to protect his family, needing to be ready at any and all times, and never being caught off guard again.

the valve finally bursts in the ancient one (s4ep14).

this is leo’s lowest moment in the series… and it’s a parallel to raph at his worst moment all the way back at the start of the series. leo loses control of his temper, and he lashes out, physically, at master splinter. his rage and resentment--be it with his brothers for “”treating this like a game”” or with himself for not “”being good enough”” or master splinter drawing attention to his anger, questioning it--is destroying him from the inside.

leo only begins to finally heal after he allows himself to not only feel all of that anger in its earnest, raw form, but also expresses it with every literal fiber of his being.

seeing his warped memory, interpretation, whatever you want to call it of the events of exodus is just… a lot. i don’t really have the vocabulary to articulate that experience, of having stewed over something for so long that you’ve rewritten events so pressure and expectations were placed on you that were never there to begin with. don, mikey, raph and master splinter never said any of those things in exodus, but at this point that’s how leo remembers it.

he not only fights the golem physically, but he’s verbally airing out that he did everything. there wasn’t anything else he could do, and the golem is WRONG in thinking that there was. and when he sees himself under the dirt and clay... it clicks.

in those last few moments of the episode, he acknowledges that he’s been obsessed, convinced he wasn’t good enough, that he was angry, and had become his own enemy. accepting the reality that he DID do everything he could and that it was enough, and flowing with it rather than bristling and tensing against it and punishing himself for it.

the scene ends with the ancient one telling him a story of when master yoshi, someone leo has respected and possibly idolized from splinter’s teachings, was also at a crossroads “not dissimilar to his own”. more assurance after usagi that he’s not alone in this, and even someone he holds in such high regard as yoshi has also struggled but found a way to be okay with imperfection.

he’s not hiding the cracks anymore. he’s looking at them. accepting them. and he’s letting the light shine through.

conclusion

as mentioned in part 1, the two books i referenced and heavily pulled from in the more enneagram-focused sections of this project (the parts where the enneagram itself is explained rather than how it applies to the turtles) were:

the wisdom of the enneagram by don richard riso & russ hudson

the road back to you by ian morgan cron & suzanne stabile

again, i don’t really know how to end this. i may not be a 1, but i have a 1 wing, so… while i don’t feel what leo feels to the same intensity, i get glimpses of it in smaller doses. it’s a lot of self-inflicted pressure, a lot of stress, and a lot of anxiety. i hope the next time someone catches themselves getting bored or irritated with the guy that this post opens a bit more empathy to him. kid’s doing his best, and a 1’s inner critic is relentless.

if i have anything more to add, i’ll include them in addendum posts and link them to this one.

we’ll be moving on over to don with the next post. if you made it all the way to the end of this post, thank you so much for reading/engaging with this wild project of mine and here: please have some brownies fresh outta the oven with a splash of vanilla ice cream, if you’d like. see you in the next one!

[jittyjames]

my favorite part of being mentally ill is taking personality tests as my favorite characters

[pastafossa]

I found your playlist for The Red Thread on Spotify, and I was so excited to see you had one with just songs from sleeping at last. I've been writing my own book for the last 5 years, and I have my own playlist with just his songs too! and his songs have many vibes for so many situations or emotions. Idk if this is weird, but I literally idolize you as a writer, so seeing this small thing we have in common makes me really happy😭

Yesssss Sleeping At Last! I was letting my TRT playlist play through the recommended at the bottom, not paying much attention, until... I think it was his song Earth that I heard first. And I was blown the fuck away, cause hello TRT vibes. And then Neptune played next and damned if that wasn't the most Jane-ish song ever

I'm only honest when it rains An open book, with a torn out page And my ink's run out I wanna love you but I don't know how

Then I saw he had Enneagram type songs and as someone who's wondered what Jane and Matt's type(s) were, well... all down the rabbit hole into a playlist from there. 😂

I think it's exactly what you said, his songs just fit for so many stories and characters and situations and emotions. They feel like story songs, like character songs, and he's beautifully poetic without it sounding cliche. I can absolutely see you having a playlist with his songs for your book, too! And I don't think it's weird at all, I'm honored, thank you so, so much! 😭 I'm also happy to say I feel the exact same way whenever I find out a writer I enjoy has something in common with me! Cause then you can be like

[dreamyplaylists]

For those interested, I’m starting up personality playlists again! Message me if you’re interested in seeing your type! This includes enneagram (including tritype and instincts if you’d like) and MBTI.

[dreamboundedstar]

Found an Album Dedicated to Enneagrams:

So I put it upon myself to make my tritype (wings included) out of the songs in a playlist. So feel free to have fun with this and make your own tritype playlist if you want.

[the-flower32]

My enneagram hyperfixation has returned & it’s because of this album;

I’d skip the first song but the rest are really good, and it has me working on my old enneagram based characters

& it was literally uploaded 2 days ago, I found it via recommended videos & they only have 2 subscribers (including me)

[berryblu-soda]

bestowing on Nyx the honor of carrying my perfectionist " i need to do everything right and if i dont i need to explode" side

good luck girlie o7

[peggy-sue-reads-a-book]

Yeah I’m a little bit slutty about all my candles who cares certainly not me

[graciehart]

LISTEN THROUGH SILENCE: An MSR Playlist ⤷ Part Two: Scully

It feels close to you, somehow, to say your name out loud.

playlist / songs ↘

SIX by Sleeping at Last / Similar to with Mulder, I haven't really thought about what enneagram I think Scully might be, but the lyrics of this song are so her. Plus: "I want to believe—no, I choose to believe—that I was made to become a sanctuary." I constantly think about "I want to believe" in the context of Scully because that's very much Mulder's thing, but it takes on so much significance when you think about it relating to Scully (just like Mulder choosing not to believe things takes on special significance as well). Mulder wants to believe in so many things, but Scully wants to believe in Mulder—and she chooses to believe.

RENEGADE by Big Red Machine & Taylor Swift / Very very Scully to Mulder. I mean— "there was nowhere for me to stay, but I stayed anyway" and "you fire off missiles 'cause you hate yourself, but do you know you're demolishing me? And then you squeeze my hand as I'm about to leave" and "it's time, you've come a long way / open the blinds, let me see your face / you wouldn't be the first renegade to need somebody" and "is it insensitive for me to say / get your shit together / so I can love you." But "open the blinds, let me see your face" really gets me because Scully truly does see Mulder, she sees him better than anyone ever has.

BETWEEN THE LINES by Sara Bareilles / Oof, this one huuuurts. I chose the title of this playlist from this song ("listen through silence") because I feel like it goes pretty well with Mulder's playlist ("amidst the chaos," also from a Sara Bareilles song) and because it's so much of what Scully does while Mulder learns—she listens through silence and reads between the lines. ALSO: "I'm queen of attention to details, defending intentions if he fails." Scully is forever the first to defend Mulder no matter what he does, always from a place of love.

BREATHE by Lauv / There are so many songs that could be applied to both of them, but for some reason or another I choose it for one of their individual playlists (this being one of them). I think one of my favorite parts fits Mulder better—"I should leave 'cause you deserve better"—but overall this song made me think of Scully, especially during I Want to Believe. "You're my all and more, but I need room to breathe."

WATER WORSHIP PRAY by Grace Power / This song also makes me think of I Want to Believe, and I especially love this song for Scully because of all the religious imagery. "How can two people fall apart when they both want the same thing? How can my happiness be you, but I'm not happy at all?" OW. And also: "First peace I ever knew / Can't love you well enough to keep you or enough to let you go / I'd rather stay in purgatory with you than in heaven alone."

IF PATIENCE DOESN'T KILL ME by Alison Sudol / I'm very aware that this is a pretty specific sound that not everyone will love, but I love Alison Sudol and I feel like this song is perfect for Scully so I kept it anyway. I just feel like the lyrics fit her perfectly—"if patience is a virtue, I abound / ... / if patience doesn't kill me, I'm yours." And it's where the description comes from—"it feels close to you, somehow, to say your name out loud." It feels like they constantly are calling for each other both because they want them there and trust they will be there, but also because the simple act of calling for each other makes them feel less alone.

GIVE UP THE GHOST by Rosi Golan & Johnny McDaid / Another song I love (I would've titled this "Quiet the Noise" if I hadn't already used that as a playlist title) that takes on new meaning when you think about it in an MSR context. Ghosts take on a different significance when thinking about Mulder (also, @leiascully just KILLED me with her fic and "I don't love anything more than I love you, Scully. Not even ghosts." Literally what the fuck). Even the very beginning of this song—"come here, it's all worth the fight when it's you, dear." And "slow down, we're losing the meaning of words now / quiet the noise 'cause we made a mountain of minuscule things." And Scully really does quiet his noise.

THE BEACON by A Fine Frenzy / The lyrics in the gifset are from this song and if I could write out the entire song without it being ridiculous, I would. I swear this could truly be a song written by Scully about Mulder. I mean, just starting with the first verse: "You say your time has come / you're tired of waking up / don't be obscene, I can't conceive of living without you / You say you drag me down, no one should want you now / I start to cry, you kiss my eyes and say I'm not allowed to." And then, AND THEN the second verse: "you were a child forgot / lessons of love untaught / now no embrace can quite replace the one that never found you / I was raised tenderly / all that was taught to me / I will apply / Your parents tried, but they didn't know how to." Like. Okay. Sure. That's fine.

SATURN by Sleeping at Last / I know I'm not alone with this one because I've seen multiple videos of them set to this song, but I chose to put it on Scully's playlist because it really makes me think of Mulder's abduction arc/when he wakes up in "Deadalive." Just imagine her listening to this song sitting by his side, holding his hand, willing him to wake up. GAH.

YOU MATTER TO ME by Jessie Mueller & Drew Gehling / This is another song I was debating for both of them, but the first verse especially makes me think of Scully: "I could find the whole meaning of life in those sad eyes / they've seen things you never quite say, but I hear / come out of hiding, I'm right here beside you / and I'll stay there as long as you'll let me."

SOMEONE WHO LOVES ME by Sara Bareilles / This song wrecks me and has some of the most beautiful lyrics I've ever heard. One reason I love it for Scully is because of the hug at the end of "Irresistable." This is another song I would have considered for a playlist title ("my home, my heart") if I hadn't already used it before. But the way it's sung always gets to me—"my home, my heart, thank god you are someone who loves me," like she's exhaling into the safety of his arms.

I F*CKING LOVE YOU by Zolita / The song pretty much says it all: "what if I let it slip, tell you that oh my god, I fucking love you."

WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT by Emily James / I absolutely love the first part of this song when she says "I just wanna say that I'm not going anywhere anytime soon unless it's with you." What really made me think of MSR was this, though: "'cause we've been busy lying to ourselves, swearing it would never work / promising that we were just friends / it's funny how it doesn't make sense / and then it does." And I love the idea of Scully thinking again about how different her life is, how this is so far from where she thought she'd be, but with a little bit of wonder: "who would've thought that it would've been you?"

[huellitaa]

long list of little things to do for urself 🧸🎀🫶✨

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 1. wash ur bedding, towels, curtains, etc.

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 2. fill up ur shopping baskets on every site possible

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 3. clean out cosmetics and skincare

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 4. start a project of something you love

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 5. browse cute pets to buy one day

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 6. impulsively rearrange ur space

🩷𓂃 ࣪˖ 7. light some candles (if u arent deathly afraid of fire)

🐇𓂃 ࣪˖ 8. clean out your purse and every day bag

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 9. make a pillow fort

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 10. redo all ur playlists and clean them all out

���🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 11. lay on the floor and sing ur fav songs for 3 hours

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 12. make a recipe book (even if u cant cook)

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 13. clean ur mirrors and windows

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 14. write a debate about a topic you feel strongly on

🩷𓂃 ࣪˖ 15. create some art to go on ur walls

🐇𓂃 ࣪˖ 16. stick up some old photos or cute things and decorate ur walls

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 17. polish ur jewelry

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 18. write a huge essay on something you know nothing about

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 19. watch a virtual concert (youtube - tiny desk is v good!)

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 20. make urself a big fruit platter

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 21. read a parenting book and see how you can incorporate the tips mentioned into how u treat urself

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 22. mend ur old clothes or get someone to help u fix them

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 23. read a book w a flashlight and happy music under a blanket

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 24. host a tea party w ur plushies and old toys

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 25. study ur horoscope for this month and how u can use it to ur advantage

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 26. go thrifting and window shopping and take photos on ur phone of the things you want to create a visual wishlist

🩷𓂃 ࣪˖ 27. sort through ur books, cds, clothes, etc.; organise and throw out!

🐇𓂃 ࣪˖ 28. perform a concert in ur bedroom of ur fav album ever

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 29. dress up and create the most elaborate, unhinged outfits you possibly can

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 30. start a blog or site on something you care about

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 31. contemplate ur core philosophies and question what is the meaning of life and what you're living for

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 32. spend all day reading a random pdf book ur never gonna find again

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 33. plan out ur dream wedding online

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 34. fully examine ur body and make sure everything's working and looking fine

🩷𓂃 ࣪˖ 35. create outfits within a specific theme and try them on

🐇𓂃 ࣪˖ 36. go online shopping for clothes and make outfits w the things you find even if you don't like them

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 37. make a playlist of all the songs u used to love when you were younger

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 38. build a tower out of stationery or anything you can find and make it as tall as you can

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 39. take a picture of something ur grateful for wherever you go

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 40. live out ur daydreams on pinterest and make random boards of random lifestyles or dreams you have or are interested in

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 41. organise ur digital storage like apps, google drive, documents, photos, desktop, games, consoles, etc.

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 42. randomly set a reminder for somewhen in the future that you can think of saying that everything will be okay

🩷𓂃 ࣪˖ 43. have a park day without ur phone and make ur own entertainment

🐇𓂃 ࣪˖ 44. find ur enneagram number, do ur myers briggs test, study ur birth chart, find out more about urself bcuz ur the most important subject you could ever study

🎀𓂃 ࣪˖ 45. write down ur biggest, wildest dreams with no bounds whatsoever

🧸𓂃 ࣪˖ 46. attentively track ur moods for a day or a few; take note of how ur feeling every few hours, note it down and ask urself what impacts it to change and fluctuate

🫶🏻𓂃 ࣪˖ 47. educate urself in whats going on in the world right now

🧁𓂃 ࣪˖ 48. learn about the history of ur home town

⭐𓂃 ࣪˖ 49. create a list of all ur favourite things and rank them like cosmetics, perfumes, bands, foods, drinks, etc.

💬𓂃 ࣪˖ 50. make a music video playlist to play on ur tv

all my love... 💬🎀🫶🏻💗

[mysticstarlightduck]

Character Introduction - Valen Cassidy (Scrapyard Boys)

⚡・・About/General Info ・・⚡

A street urchin despised by the government of New Omnium, Valen was once the son of a celebrated journalist - his mother was a woman who was on the verge of uncovering and exposing the true schemes going on under the surface of their city's elite, when she was suspiciously killed. Valen was then almost sent by the government to the mysterious Spectre Academies - a training ground for mutant youths, beloved by the public but which holds dark secrets within - but before they could, Valen managed to escape, utilizing his Electrokinesis powers to neutralize the agents and allow him to escape into the lower districts of the city, where he disappeared from the grid. Valen grew into a rebellious and defiantly angry young man, classified as one of the city's Top 10 Most Dangerous mutant outlaws, a target to be eliminated. With the help of his chaotic crew of other superpowered street urchins, Valen finds himself following his mother's footsteps - but this time through a vigilante route - to expose their city's dystopic regime and find out the truth behind the billionaire industries that built it. And slowly, they start to figure out that the origins of mutant powers in humanity was not quite what they were led to believe, and that the strange occurances happening all around the city were not mere coincidences.

⚡・・More Info ・・⚡

Pronouns - He/Him Current Role - Protagonist, Part of the Main Cast Appearance - Valen has very, very long, curly, and voluminous golden blond hair, messily styled and which he takes a lot of pride in. His eyes are a deep electric blue, like the color of lightning or electricity, which is fitting given one of his main powers is Electrokinesis. He is average height, though on the shorter end of the spectrum for someone in his late teens (when the main story starts), but he is very strong - freakishly so, for someone who is so lanky and whose powers have nothing to do with strength. He wears ripped-up denim vests with customized patches, an old, dark black shirt with the logo of his favorite rock band, also ripped-up jean pants and bright red long-neck sneakers, as well as tin rings and cheap necklaces. He has a menacing look that usually pushes others away, like a brewing lightning storm.

Personality Types:

✶ Enneagram: 8w7

✶ MBTI: ESTP

Occupation: Street Urchin, Vigilante, Rebel Powers: Eletrokinesis, Eletrical Conduction, Storm Manipulation, and the likes! Sexuality: Straight Alias: Thunderfall

⚡・・Extras・・⚡

✶ Character Playlist

Heathens - Twenty One Pilots

So Far Away - Staind

King For A Day - Pierce The Veil

overwhelmed - Royal & The Serpent

Break Stuff - Limp Bizkit

Here's To Never Growing Up - Avril Lavigne

Heat of The Moment - Asia

Buy The Stars - Marina & The Diamonds

And More!!!

・・・

✶ Tags:

#wip scrapyard boys #oc: valen cassidy #oc: thunderfall

Scrapyard Boys Taglist (-/+): @ray-writes-n-shit, @sarandipitywrites, @lassiesandiego, @smol-feralgremlin, @kaylinalexanderbooks,

@diabolical-blue @oh-no-another-idea

@cakeinthevoid, @clairelsonao3, @sleepy-night-child

@thepeculiarbird

@the-golden-comet, @urnumber1star, @ominous-feychild, @anyablackwood, @amaiguri, @lyutenw @finickyfelix

@thecomfywriter, @the-letterbox-archives @differentnighttale, @wyked-ao3

Let me know if you'd like to be added!

[stars-tonight]

hi there! just stumbled across your account :> i’d like to request for long haikyuu matchup, please! also, this is my anon emoji hehe: 🦑

main details:

firstly, i'd like a romantic pairing!

i am female (she/her) and i'd like to be paired with a guy. generally,

i prefer not to be paired with a character who's considered immature/childish (they’re better off as friends! 😭)

my ideal partner: 

the type of person that any parent would approve of immediately. like they would just ADORE him! (family is very very important to me!)

i’d also like someone creative, or at the very least appreciative of things like music, art, literature, you name it!

knowledgeable and nerdy guys are also really cute!! like YES talk to me about your interests!! also i'd like to be able to learn new things from them

would be nice if he's a foodie, or gives importance to sharing of meals together

good balance of listener and talker. overall a good communicator! <3

my personality traits:

my mbti is infp (mediator). conflict and challenge has me worrying and overthinking most of the time.

i am primarily influenced by emotional reasons/motivations (though of course, i still try to be logical).

i am introverted, but social and talkative when i'm comfortable with people. still need alone time to recharge, and by default, i am a reserved/quiet person.

overachiever, which causes me some anxiousness and stress sometimes bc of personal standards T-T (i need to be kinder to myself)

i try to be very patient and accommodating with others (but mostly it's also because i am a people-pleaser aaaaaaa)

hobbies: i’m a creative at heart! i love anything to do with:

music (listening, making playlists, playing electric guitar, producing)

arts/crafts (drawing, journaling, crocheting, graphic design)

worldbuilding (original character creation, self-inserts, writing, extensive research on franchise lore hahahaha)

love languages (giving and receiving):

words of affirmation and physical touch <3

sharing meals!

ideal date:

so hard to narrow this down tbh! i generally gravitate to the idea of casual café or home dates, because it's just chill and we could have meaningful conversations with each other.

but if we're doing something special, i would love an aquarium date! (oh my god i'm already imagining getting those cute sea creature plushies at the gift shop... WHY AM I SINGLE!!

likes:

food (if that wasn't clear enough hahaha), especially noodle dishes

colorful things! rainbowcore should give you an idea hahaha

stuffed toys and stickers. i collect so many of them oh goodness

learning about human sciences! psychology, anatomy and physiology, development, etc.

tabletop games! scrabble is my favorite hahaha

fav music is rock & kpop. generally, anything high-energy

other info:

my hogwarts house is ravenclaw

i'm a pisces (idk much about astrology though lol hahaha)

enneagram is 9w8!

hope this all helps! have a good dayyy <3

headcanons

🥛 mr. mature right here for ya

🥛 you can't tell me akaashi isn't the guy all parents want their child to date

🥛 he would totally get your mom flowers when he first meets them

🥛 he's so nervous he's shaking >_< (he's so cute, everyone needs an akaashi in their lives)

🥛 akaashi is a big literature guy and he'd definitely appreciate art of all kinds, including visual art and music

🥛 he's also very knowledgeable and i headcanon him as a little bit nerdy (especially about books)

🥛 while akaashi's not a foodie, he definitely hopes to eat meals with you and maybe even cook for you. mealtimes to him are always supposed to be spent with loved ones, as it's a time to catch up and just talk and be with each other

���� and he's a really good communicator :)

🥛 akaashi tends to be more logical in his thinking and decision making so you could balance out and help each other

🥛 you're both introverted overachievers which hopefully means you'd be able to relate to each other and help each other overcome these challenges

🥛 while akaashi is a generally chill guy, he is not a people pleaser and he will make sure you put yourself first!

🥛 he doesn't listen to music much because it makes it hard to focus on reading but if he ever needs inspiration he'd definitely put on some classical music

🥛 i imagine he'd be really good at arts and crafts (setting -> thin and nimble fingers -> good at precise-ness and stuff)

🥛 he'd love worldbuilding with you! he's an editor, so he's not necessarily doing the worldbuilding, but he has to be really good at it anyway. you can run characters by each other, it's always nice to have a second set of eyes on your work

🥛 akaashi is a words of affirmation guy, he's great at giving them but also needs them 🥺

🥛 i touched on the sharing meals part already but that'd also be very important to him

🥛 he's not big on pda but in private will for sure enjoy holding hands or cuddling

🥛 akaashi also definitely prefers calm or private dates; there's not as many people and it's not as loud or chaotic

🥛 he'd always keep an eye out for cute plushies or stickers and if he finds one he knows you'd like he'll get it for you! especially if he knows you've been having a rough week

runner up for you was kita shinsuke!

A/N: hi 🦑anon! i hope you liked your matchup, i had a lot of fun writing it! this was actually a really easy choice, and thank you for formatting your request so neatly (it was super visually pleasing lol)!

[bubblespalace]

Hello! I want a matchup for Diabolik Lovers! Take your time and thank u so much! ^^

Physical Description: almost 1'70cm, a bit chubby (my friends say that I'm like the women on art sculpture but a bit chubbier). I have wavy hair (I have big natural curls), medium short and dark brown. My eyes are dark brown too, with sunlight they look orange. I have so many moles, like 3 or 4 in the face and have like 3 birthmarks on my belly. I have a big nose, just like Hange Zoe from AOT nose.

Zodiac Sign: Sun Taurus / Moon Aires / Ascendent Taurus / Venus Aries

MBTI + Enneagram: INTP 7w6

Sexuality: Bisexual

Age + Pronouns: 23 yo she/her

Personality: Everyone that knows me says that I'm the mom friend, but that sometimes I'm like a child and like to do pranks and act silly. At the start I'm someone cold and serious because I live so many betrayals from friends, but when I connect with someone I give everything about me to be with that person. I'm someone really loyal to my partners and friends. I'm truly clumsy too, like I can get hurt, have a bruise and don't remember when or how I get hurt. I'm the older sister of a party girl so I usually treat all my younger friends like little siblings.

Likes + Dislikes: I like photography (I'm a professional wedding photographer). I studied at an Art School so I like art and know how to draw. I love animals even though I'm allergic to most animals, I don't care about getting a little sick because I've been with animals just a bit. I love playing videogames like Genshin Impact, Honkai Star Rail and classics like Pokemon. I love anime too, my actual favourite is Tokyo Revengers. I love musicals and usually listen to some all day on my earphones, the ones that I most like are Epic, Hamilton, Mamma Mia and Heathers. I love sweets! But the food that I like the most is strawberries with condensed milk.

Hobbies + Passions: I love my work and photography, I have been working on weddings for some years and I love recording the beautiful memories of those days. I studied photography at an Art School and they teach me to think more artistic and for fashion, and I like that work too. My real dream was being a journalist but it was too difficult and I decided to work as a news photographer, I'm still trying to be one. I usually listen to music all day in my earphones while doing things in my house or work, sometimes I put the music out loud and sing the songs of my playlists. I love playing Roll, I like being the master and writing stories for the player and seeing how they react to everything. As I said before, I love videogames and play sometimes. I like buying manga and collecting them, actually I have all Tokyo Revengers manga and like to collect the characters books.

I was split between Ayato and Shuu, for you, however, I eventually settled on SHUU SAKAMAKI (78 % match)

Shuu honestly fits the best with you, because of your 'mom friend' demeanor. And, when you do have your silly moments, he's likely to get a chuckle out of it before going back to sleep. As long as you don't play a prank on him.

Artist/Muse may land to be a thing with you two. Considering both of you have an artistic quality. You both also have in common the earphones thingy lol.

Since you love sweets, you may end up getting Shuu's dessert each time you go out on a date since he canonically dislikes sweet things. [Oppisites attract here]

He might playfully tease you for being clumsy, saying you just want his attention before pulling you into a cuddle session. Not a 100% match, because Shuu might end up finding you too energetic for his tastes. And he doesn't really share your interest in manga or any other entertainment. Other possible matches: Ayato Sakamaki ( 75% match ) Kou Mukami ( 70 % match ) Reiji Sakamaki ( 65 % match )

[autisticempathydaemon]

hi, i was hoping to do one of the redacted matchup thingies, they’re so fun :) I’M SO SORRY THIS IS A PAGE LONG AAAAGH

i’m just gonna lead with the miscellaneous stuff (WOW i spelled that without spell check. didn’t know i could do that.) i’m a young adult bi dude. apparently i’m quiet but snarky and people say my humor is very dry (i have a monotone voice and am Very Committed To The Bit.). i used to have really bad anger issues to the point that davey pre-character arc is more relatable than he should be (even though my parents are alive. they’re just shit). i try to dress kinda grungy? but also whatever’s cozy/comfortable and in neutral/dark colors (except red! i like red, my hair is dyed neon red) i used to have cptsd so bad i basically didn’t leave the house for two years. i think it was like agoraphobia or something? there were delusions in there too. i’m much better now though.

usually the kind of stuff i listen to is loud angry rock music (fave song is hysteria by muse) or slightly older pop music (florence and the machine, MARINA) but the last few days i’ve been on a newer pop kick and i’ve been playing “Good Luck, Babe!” by chappell roan on repeat and it makes me want to scream on a windswept seaside cliff during a storm. specifically the bit from 2:15 to ~3:10 in the song. i know it’s a banger when it makes me want to scream on a cliff or punch something.

INTP? is that an enneagram? (“you’re telling me a shrimp fried this rice?”-sounding sentence, sorry)

not really video essays but i love listening to someone summarize books i never plan to read (i like the ones by cari can read or lexi aka newlynova.)

i didn’t have an imaginary friend? i’m incredibly autistic + adhd so i was daydreaming constantly to a near maladaptive extent but i never had One Consistent Thing that i thought was real.

i have to mash my face into the pillow for a bit to decompress and then i can sleep how i normally do, sleeping on my side in a way that’s probably very bad for my shoulders. (i am an adult dude and i hold a stuffed bunny who i haven’t given a name every night to go to sleep. maybe ill name the bunny after whatever character you give me)

my name is stolen from the love interest of a YA steampunk novel (a young victorian gentleman who wears eyeliner), because his character description just fits me so well, as well as the name itself just looking cool written down

my fave audio is probably the smash bros tournament :D. it literally convinced me to buy the game lol

it’s a good thing i’m anonymous cause i just do not get the gavin or caelum hype. i’m too possessive to date an incubus/ someone who will fuck other people. and i hate children so caelum is just past my threshold for kid-esque behavior that i’m willing to deal with. i’m also really not a fan of the yanderes/evil ones. other people can go ahead and like them, they just stress me out more which is the opposite of what i want.

knives out :D. the detective movie

i would friend the HELL out of asher. i just wanna play games with the man that’s all i ask

i don’t really get food at gas stations but whenever i go to a cafe i am probably getting something strawberry related (lemonade, a smoothie, etc) and a breakfast sandwich

the playlist “songs to get obliterated by a black hole to” is my pride and joy. i fucking love space and sci fi (that’s the thing i’d ramble about too)

my guilty pleasure media is the official gender-swapped twilight (puts my head in my hands) I KNOW.

I sent an anon for matchup earlier (I mentioned a stuffed bunny) and said I didn’t know what an enneagram was and I just looked it up and did a quiz and apparently I’m type 6? Idk how accurate that is but there you go (also I’m sorry if I was trauma dumping/oversharing I was restless from being inside all day whoopsie)

I’m a sucker for a good black cat/golden retriever sort of pairing, you know? Tack that onto you being a Type Six, and I’ve just got to pair you with Huxley!

Type Sixes are characterized by a desire for stability and security, for dependability, and who’s more reliable than Huxley? This also works with your self-described possessive nature in that Huxley would be the best partner to never trigger that nature, to never make you doubt or toe your boundaries. I also love him for you because we know Huxley canonically is a calming, relieving presence in the face of anger and conflict, which makes him even more perfect for you! (Also I think your grunge fashion sense would contrast so cutely with his casual, gym-bro style.)

Huxley would be so fun to be with! He’s no Asher, but he’d be a great gaming buddy, happy to show you all the Smash tips and tricks for when he introduces you to his family. Speaking of family, Huxley’s moms would just adore you for making their son happy. I can see him taking you to the east coast to meet them and taking you on the hiking and camping trails of his youth. It’d be a lovely time of you showing him the stars and constellations at night and maybe even him finding a cliff for you to sing Chappell Roan off of.

Song:

And I hold you every night/ And that's a feeling I wanna get used to/ But there's no man as terrified/ As the man who stands to lose you/ Oh, I hope I don't lose you

It was so fun to look for a pop-rock song that would make you want to scream or punch something, and I hope this fits the bill. The first chorus extremely hits on top of being a beautiful love song, and I think it wouldn’t be out of place on a road trip with Huxley in the driver’s seat or by a gorgeous cliffside.

Runner-ups:

Aaron and Sam are your runner-ups for a lot of similar reasons. They both also have drier senses of humor, so I think you could vibe and hold to a bit with either of them. I headcanon both of them wearing red often (Sam, a red-checked flannel and Aaron, a red polo a la his thumbnails), so you could match. I also headcanon both of them actively wanting to be child-free, so you’d be compatible in that aspect. Aaron outranks Sam just slightly because I think he’d offer more stability and security given his occupation and Unempowered status.

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌