#emily dickinson fanfiction

[scmg11]

EMILY DICKINSON x READER

YOU CANNOT PUT A FIRE OUT

A/N: HELLO HELLOO! How are you guys doing? Missed me?

Enjoy this new chapter ❤️

Sending you love ❤️

-

Summary: Emily meets Y/N at the well one day and just falls in love for her. When she tries to find her again the next days, it seems like she just disappeared. She was ready to lose hope when one day she finds her in her house to start a job as her new maid with her aunt Maggie. What will happen then?

Warnings: just slightly groping, nothing too much explicit.

Word count: 15380 words.

-

The sun beamed all over the expanse of the Dickinson’s garden, warming up Emily’s face as she decided to spend her morning outside, leaning on her favorite three and just soaking up in the calmness that was the nature. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the tree’s trunk surface to take a few moments of quietness in, smiling widely when she heard a few birds chirping around her, setting a warm and fuzzy feeling in her chest that always put her in a good mood. "Emily!"

The brown haired girl sighed loudly at her moment being ruined and tried to drown the sound away, but she heard it again a few seconds later and inevitably opened her eyes and turned towards the source of the sound coming from her right side, right where her house was, "yes?" Emily had to restrain herself from rolling her eyes when her mother called her name once again, ignoring her answering to her calls and making her sit up and abandon her morning in the nature to go and see whatever she needed from her.

"Emily?! Emily?!" The brown haired girl scoffed under her breath on her way back to her house, she knew her mother had head her when she was leaning on the tree but called her over nonetheless and was keeping calling her despite seeing her walking over her house, "oh Emily, dear, you’re here."

"Yes mom, what did you need? I was enjoying my day out in nature."

"I am sure it can wait, honey. I need you to go fetch water."

"Why can’t Austin or Lavinia do it?"

As if on cue the blonde made her appearance from behind Emily’s mother with what Emily deemed her trademark adorable frown since they were kids, "I did it yesterday and Austin is a man. He can’t do it."

"Right, you would believe he would be perfect for it since men’s are always bragging about themselves being strong, stronger than women, when in fact they are staying all day behind a desk while women do all the physical, exhausting stuff."

"You’re talking nonsense sweetheart." Emily rolled her eyes right in her mother’s face and grabbed the two empty buckets she had in her hands and trudged begrudgingly outside her house to walk towards the well to go fetch water as her mother asked her to.

-

"Oh no, I’m so sorry! I should’ve watched where I was going! Oh no, your dress is completely drenched, here let me help you." In mere seconds Emily bumped accidentally into a girl carrying four buckets full of water, resulting in one of them spilling over her blu navy dress, but got also got flooded with a multitude of rushed words of regret and of apology, an adorable sight that made Emily forget about her dress being completely drenched in the late summer weather.

"Don’t worry, it’s totally fine. I wasn’t watching where I was going, I had my head elsewhere. So I should be the one apologizing." Emily smiled reassuringly at the distressed girl as she desperately tried to find something to dry Emily’s dress.

"No, no. It was my fault!"

Emily tried to look at the girl’s face but it was completely covered by her hair cascading in front of it as she had her head down in search of a cloth in her small apron’s pocket she had around her hips, "I insist on taking the blame. Hey, please stop worrying. It will dry up eventually, it’s not a big deal."

"No, no. It should be here. I had it here an hour ago!"

"Hey, please. Relax, take a deep breath." Emily tried to calm the girl down and for the first time she seemed to do listen to her, sighing loudly as she took her hands out of her apron’s pocket and lifted her head up slowly.

Emily felt like the world stopped existing for just a moment when her eyes met the girl’s ones, establishing a connection that send a thrill down her spine and that lighted up her whole body, a sensation she had never felt before. "Are you okay?"

Emily took her time to commit to memory every single feature on the girl’s face, from the perfect slope of her nose to the soft bump of her cheekbones, from the gentle but still defined angle of her jaw, to the smooth surface of her chin and finally focusing all her attention on the plumpness of her velvety lips. Emily almost got lost again in the vastness of the girl’s eyes when she met them again that she almost forgot to answer the girl’s question, making her appear a bit dumb in front of her for gawking at her, "yeah, yes. I’m fine. Totally fine. Great. Hm-." Emily cleared her throat to stop herself from embarrassing herself some more continued with a regained composure, "how about you? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I am fine. Thank you."

"Good, I’m glad to hear that." Emily smiled gently at the girl before shaking her head as if she was the dumbest person on earth, "I’m Emily by the way."

"Y/N." The girl smiled gently at the poet while putting a strand of hair that fell in front of her face behind her ear, a gesture that made Emily’s brain melt as she took in the girl’s beauty.

"Y/N." Emily repeated, testing the girl’s name out, feeling a warmth spreading throughout her entire body as the name rolled over her tongue. "I like it. Y/N. It’s a really pretty name."

"Thank you. Emily is a great name too."

"Yeah, it has a Latin origin, it-."

"It’s a Roman name. It means laborious and eager among other things." Y/N interjected the brunette before she could speak and Emily had never felt so infatuated by someone in so little time.

"Yeah, how do you know that?"

"I like reading a lot. I do it whenever I can." Emily didn’t know it could have been possibile being interested in someone in so very little time, but she was starting to feel something for this girl, something she had only felt for one person only before.

"I like that too, a lot. What are you reading right now?"

"I just finished reading ‘The Old Curiosity Shop’ by Dickens. I liked it. What about you?"

"I am in the middle of reading The Divine Comedy by Dante. I’m halfway through Inferno."

"Oh I liked it a lot even though Purgatorio and Paradiso are just as beautiful. I mean his writing style gets more complex and more refined after each part."

Emily felt like she was floating through a new dimension where only Y/N and her existed, instigating a myriad of new emotions Emily never felt before that mixed with a few ones she only felt for Sue. "Wow, I-. I don’t know what to say. It’s the first time I hear someone talk about Dante’s amazing work without it being repeated from some stupid journalist’s review. No one really care to really read it. Or at least comprehend its real meaning behind his words."

"Because not everyone can see through what’s in front of them. There’s beauty hidden in every single thing we know, creating something new that just awaits to be discovered, studied. Most people just waits for someone else to do it." Y/N reasoned with a shrug, like she just didn’t made Emily fall madly in love with her brain.

"Wow- I- I feel like you had been in my mind and found a way to make it speak for itself. You-."

"Y/N! Are you ready to go?!" The poet got interrupted by a loud voice coming from behind Emily and when she turned around to look at who was yelling, she found a middle-aged woman with blonde hair styled in a perfect, classy bun, a blue dress with an apron on her front similar to Y/N’s one waving at her from the grocery’s shop a few feet from them.

"Sorry, I need to go. It was great talking with you Emily."

Emily felt her stomach drop at the aspect of having to part ways with Y/N, trying to find a way to prolong their time together. As she closed herself in her mind to think she didn’t notice Y/N refilling the bucket she unwillingly spilled over Emily and walked towards the woman, saluting Emily with a small nod. The gesture pulled Emily out of her thoughts and coming up empty-handed with ideas to make Y/N stay with her a bit longer, she could only sigh out loud, resigned but also completely smitten for the Y/H/C girl, before letting out softly, "the pleasure was all mine Y/N."

-

"Emily, where is the water?"

"What?" Emily got ripped out of her own thoughts full of the mysterious and intriguing Y/N by her mother as soon as she entered her house, her mother stopping her in their small hallway in front of the door and the living rooms before she could run upstairs and let her thoughts flow freely as she wrote a poem or two.

"The water Emily. I sent you fetching water an hour ago. Where is it?"

"Oh shit!" Emily just then noticed she came home empty-handed, she forgot her empty buckets at the well after her encounter with Y/N. "I forgot them at the well!"

"How?! You went there just for fetching water. How did you manage to forget that Emily?"

"I- I gotta go. Later!"

"Emily!"

"I don’t have time mom, I need to-." Emily got stopped mid-sentence and in her track towards her house’s door by her mother’s authoritative voice calling her from the living room.

"Emily! Come here, now."

"Mom, I have everything under control. I got distracted and I forgot the buckets there. I will be quick. I will go get them, fetch water and come back here." Emily explained quickly, hoping her mother wouldn’t be so much angry at herself for not doing what she asked her to do and getting ready for her scolding when she sighed out loud, pinched the bridge of her nose angrily and closed her eyes.

"It’s not that Emily. You are always avoiding doing chores, always complaining about them and never doing them in the end. It’s time for you to grow up. You will need to know how to be a proper housewife."

"But mom, I-."

"No buts." Emily’s mother ended their discussion with those final words spoken with authority and nodded at her daughter when she nodded dejected at her not winning this argument. "Since Lavinia is going to get a few groceries from the store and I’m going with her with the carriage, I’m going to go fetch water, while you’ll go into your room and think about what you did."

"Okay, mom. I’m so sorry." Emily’s mother smiled gently at her daughter for apologizing and laid a soft kiss on her forehead before she walked towards the stairs that would led to the first floor where the bedrooms were. She smiled apologetically at her mother once again but before she could go up the stairs and into her room to think and most importantly let her mind flow with writing her poems, she got stopped in her tracks.

"What is happening here?" Emily turned around at the sound of her father’s voice reaching her ears as he made his way into the living room after exiting his office, where he had been holed up the whole morning.

"Edward, your daughter Emily this morning was tasked to go fetch water and after disappearing for more than an hour, she also forgot our buckets at the well. Unbelievable!" Emily hung her head down in shame and closed her eyes to get herself ready for one of her father’s scoldings, not particularly thrilled on having her good mood ruined right now, but she had a feeling it was coming anyway as it was well due after her forgetting their buckets at the well.

"But also hilarious." Emily lifted her head up in shock after hearing her father’s words, not exactly expecting them, and widened her eyes comically. What was actually hilarious to Emily was her mother’s bewildered expression that stretched over her face as she stared in shock at her father. If she wasn’t already walking on thin ice, she would have laughed at her mother’s expression, so she kept quiet and listened to the conversation unfolding in front of her.

"Excuse me, dear, what?!"

"Oh c’mon, Mrs. Dickinson. You have to admit, it’s funny." Emily laughed nervously when her father started laughing loudly while looking at her mother then at her.

"But-." Emily bit on her bottom lip to prevent her smile to widen when her mother tried to reason with her father but he waved her off with a few chuckles still coming out of his lips.

"Oh, come on now Mrs. Dickinson. I know you want to laugh." Edward smiled at his wife and pointed his finger at the blonde woman, not putting it down until she saw a small grin making its way onto the woman’s lips, "ah there it is!"

"Oh dear, always finding a way to laugh! Anyway, I’m going with Lavinia to the grocery store and to retrieve our buckets to fetch water for dinner tonight."

"Great, I’m coming with you girls. I need to go to speak to Ronald about a really important matter I worked on this morning."

"Oh that’s wonderful, dear. Emily, why don’t you make it up to us by starting dinner?" Emily almost let her jaw drop down on the floor at her mother’s request. She knew she wasn’t a great cook, she hated cooking and something always ended up catching fire. But she also knew this was her mother’s way to tell her she wasn’t forgiven for the fetching water fiasco as her father made it sound and as much as she wanted to fight over it, she knew there wasn’t a way out of this. Oh, well it was worth a try.

"Mom, I don’t th-."

"Oh what a wonderful idea Mrs. Dickinson! I can’t wait to taste what you will prepare for us Emily! Let’s go now, we are gonna be late!"

Emily sighed dejected while making her way towards the kitchen to start up dinner and as she tried to not set the whole house on fire, she let her mind fill with the few memories she had of Y/N. She was fascinating, captivating, alluring. She piqued Emily’s interest with just a few words and when Y/N expressed her passion for books, ignited a fire in Emily that had been extinguished since she had broken things off with Sue. Could that mean something? Emily was sure she felt their souls connect in such a raw and deep way she had never experienced before, but would that be enough for Y/N as it was for her? As she started baking the freshly made loaf of bread, a sudden need to know if Y/N felt the same hit her and with a renewed determination she set her mind to try to encounter the Y/H/C girl the next morning.

-

"Good morning my dear mother." Emily entered the kitchen with a grin so bright they could have used it to light up the whole house at night, arousing suspects from her mother that stared at her warily as she watched her make her way towards her as she prepared their breakfast.

"Emily, good morning to you too. Did something happen that put you in a good mood?"

"Nothing in particular. I just woke up like this today. Do you need help? I still want to make it up to you again for yesterday. Maybe I can go fetch the water again? This time I will bring back the buckets, I promise." Emily tried to be as subtle as she could without making her mother ask the real reasons behind her intentions on wanting to go fetch water, finishing with a joke to sell it better.

"Oh sweety, what a wonderful idea. You can help me with putting everything in the living room. And don’t worry about fetching water, Vinnie already went this morning."

With her heart sinking down in her stomach, she reluctantly grabbed the tray full of their breakfast her mother already prepared to the living room, trudging a bit in her steps as she tried to think of another strategy to meet Y/N again.

-

"Emily can you please help me with dinner?"

"I can’t mom, I need to write. I don’t have time to help you with dinner or chores."

"Well, I am sure it can wait." Emily snorted under her breath at her mother’s rebuttal as she made her way into her room.

"No mom, it sadly can’t. When words flow out of me I can’t stop them or ask them to wait to help with chores."

"It’s worth a try, isn’t it? I need help Emily, Vinnie is setting the table after cleaning the house, so you’re the one who will help me. C’mon, it will be fun!"

"I’m sure it will, but I really can’t right now. It would be so much easier if we get a housemaid to help you out."

"You are talking nonsense Emily, I am perfectly capable of doing it all by myself and with the help of my daughters everything can be done faster, so now please come down with me and help me out. You will write later." Emily sighed out as she let her pencil fall down on her desk, the soft clinking sound of the pencil hitting the wooden surface of her desk calmed Emily just a little, making a quick grin appear on her lips before a small frown took its place. The poet sat up slowly from her desk, placing both of her hands on it to slowly stand up, the screeching sound of the chair moving back filling the sudden silent room as her mother watched her movements with rapt attention.

"I will help you for just a bit, but I can’t take too long on helping you with chores because I’m really trying to finish a poem."

"That’s the spirit! C’mon honey, I will show you how to make the perfect roasted chicken that will make you the perfect housewife every gentleman would love to marry."

More like gentlewoman. Emily added in her mind and as soon as that thought came into her mind, Y/N appeared right after as she smiled lovingly at her. That instantly made Emily stop in her tracks on the stairs, watching blankly her mother’s back as she descended the stairs and rambled about roasted chicken Emily wasn’t interested in listening at the moment. What made Emily freeze in her spot was the fact that for the first time since she could remember she didn’t imagine marrying Sue. She imagined Y/N. And that thought excited her to no end, instead of scaring her. "Shit." Emily sighed dopily as she smiled with her eyes full of love as another image of Y/N waving at her entered her mind.

"Emily, hurry up!" Emily let her dumb smile linger a few more seconds on her features before shaking her head and resuming her way down the stairs to join her mother in the kitchen and help her with their dinner.

-

"We should hire a maid to help mom out in the house."

"What?"

"We should hire a maid to help mom out in the house."

"I heard you the first time dear, I was just shocked by the request." Edward smiled gently at her daughter repeating herself before going back to being serious as he regarded her with a curious look in his features. "Why should we hire a maid? Your mother is perfectly capable of doing a good job here."

"Ah- a great job dear! I told you this earlier Emily. We don’t need a maid."

"But it would be so much easier for you. For all of us! She would help mom with chores so she doesn’t tire herself out every single day. And she would do a lot of things mom asks me or Vinnie to do. C’mon dad, think about it!"

"Well-."

"Edward you are not seriously considering it, aren’t you?"

"Honey, she is not completely wrong. She would help you out, you know I hate how much tired you are at the end of the day."

They kept discussing it for a few more minutes as they enjoyed their dinner but when the dessert came, her mother served it in an unsettling silence so they moved onto a new subject Emily wasn’t interested in listening. As she ate her dessert she couldn’t help but let her eyes linger on her mother a few times and observed her as she stayed quiet for the rest of the dinner with a sad expression on her features. Despite her mother not taking assuming a maid to help her too well, Emily was sure she will come around eventually. Emily knew she was asking to hire a maid to have more time to write but she also really wanted her to help her mother and ease her load of work to do in the house.

-

"Good morning dear family."

"Good morning to you too Edward." Emily’s mother smiled widely at her husband as she finished serving everybody’s breakfast before her grin got ten times wider and brighter when Edward leaned over and kissed her gently.

"Hm, I can smell so many delicious things today." Emily watched as her father sat down in his chair and brought up his newspaper to read the news, his smile never dampening.

"I can see you are in a good mood this morning, dear."

"Because I am."

"I’m glad to hear that, honey."

"How is my family doing this morning?" Edward brought his newspaper down after reading a few paragraphs of the first news and took a sip of his tea, then moving onto taking a bite of her wife’s famous scones, humming in satisfaction at the taste.

"I am good dad, I just finished reading an article about financial management that I found pretty interesting." Austin was the first to speak up after taking a sip of his own tea, smiling at his father as he did so when he nodded at him in understanding.

"And what about my girls?"

"Last night I finished sewing a pillow for my cat, he loves it!" Lavinia announced with a bright grin, her enthusiasm filling the room as everyone at the table smiled at the ecstatic blonde.

"I finished a few poems I was working on."

"That’s great guys, I see everyone is proud of their achievements! But now let’s move on why I am in a good mood today. There is a reason and that said reason is- after considering it for the last few days, I decided that we will hire a maid to help in the house!"

"What?!" Everyone exclaimed at the table at the same time with excited tones, except for Mrs. Dickinson, who looked at her husband like he went completely nuts.

"Yeah!" Edward smiled alongside his son and daughters, not noticing her wife’s expression yet, "I thought about it and in the end it was a really great idea Emily!"

"I’m so happy to hear that dad!"

"Honey, why are you doing this?" Mrs. Dickinson finally found her voice to speak up and asked in a strained tone the first thing that came up in her hazed mind still shocked from the news Edward delivered.

"Oh dear, it will be good for the house and for you. You tire yourself up too much for this house."

"But- I’m fine."

"I know you want to make it look like it, but I know some days are really stressful. I see how spent you are after those days at night. I’m doing this for you too!" Edward explained calmly as he enjoyed his breakfast, his good mood still on.

"Yeah, I can be a little tired, but a great night of sleep sweeps it all away and restores my energy back."

"I am sure of that, but it will good! We can do more small trips or spend days differently when I am not working and you’re not thinking about doing any kind of chore in the house."

"Yeah, mom, it will be good for everyone here, you’ll see!" Austin butted in with a cheerful tone and nodded at her mother still looking worried and skeptic.

"Yeah mom, you can finally focus on yourself a bit more." Lavinia then decided to add her thoughts too, trying to encourage her mother on relaxing on this topic, although she knew it was a sore spot since she always aspired to be a great housewife and having a maid restrained her from doing that in her mind.

"Mom, think about it, you can find a new hobby with the extra free time you will have!" It was Emily this time that spoke up, encouraging her mother with a brighter-than-the-sun grin that unfortunately her mother didn’t reciprocate as she stayed frozen in her chair with her eyebrows furrowed together and a sad expression on her features.

"See? The kids have all good points!" Edward looked at his wife with a wide grin, nodding at her encouragingly, "anyway, the decision is already made. They are coming here tonight."

"They?" Emily wanted to snort under her breath at the outraged tone her mother used to pose the question to her father, but decided to stay still for once and enjoy the show in front of her.

"Yeah, two of them. One of my dearest friends is moving to Minnesota and he doesn’t need his maids anymore since he won’t take them with him, so they are coming here. He told me they are the best maids in Amherst. An Irish woman and her niece."

"That’s so exciting!" Lavinia exclaimed as she clapped her hands enthusiastically, making Emily and Austin smile fondly at her.

-

"Ah, good evening! Come inside please!"

"Good evening Mr. Dickinson." Emily could hear from downstairs his father greeting guests at the door but she shrugged and went back to her poem, but for some reason her attention shifted back to the new guests in their house and after a few more attempt of focusing to write a few more lines in vain, the poet gave up and sighed out loud as she placed everything in her small drawer in her desk, before sitting up from the chair and making her way downstairs to greet their guests.

"We’re so happy to have you here!"

"The pleasure is all ours Mr. Dickinson." An Irish accent waved through the air, increasing Emily’s curiosity and made her almost sprint down the stairs to go see the new maids as soon as she realized who their guests were.

"Oh Lavinia, come here. They are our new maids."

"Nice to meet you!"

"Nice to meet you Miss Dickinson." Something like a familiar voice reached Emily’s ears as she descended the last few steps and almost fell down of them when she got at the top of the last set of stairs and her eyes met with a pair of wonderful, familiar irises.

"The pleasure is all mine, trust me!"

"Ah, Emily! You are here too. They are our new maids."

"Oh hello Miss Dickinson."

"Good evening Miss Dickinson."

"H-hello. Just call me Emily, please." The poet found the strength to descend the last few steps and even talk coherently before walking slowly towards the two new guests in her house, stopping right beside her father.

"You will meet my son soon. He is coming here with his wife tonight. And about my wife, I really don’t know where she is." Edward joked, making the two guests laugh softly under their breath, clear, wide smiles etched on their lips. "Anyway, they are Mrs. Maggie and Miss Y/N."

"It’s a real pleasure meeting you both." Lavinia butted in sincerely and nodded at them softly, meanwhile Emily still tried to properly kickstart her brain.

"It’s a pleasure for me too. I hope you will enjoy staying here."

"Oh Miss Dickinson, I am sure it will be amazing staying here." Maggie countered back with a warm grin, mirrored by Y/N right after with a small nod of her head.

"Alright, girls would you mind showing them around?"

"I need to finish a few things for my art lesson tomorrow." Lavinia admitted dejectedly and the fact that she could potentially be alone with Y/N again thrilled Emily to no end.

"I can show them around the house, no problem Vinnie. Dad we will see you later."

"Okay, have fun!" Emily smiled and nodded at her father before dorkily lifting her thumb up and saluted him before signaling Y/N and Maggie to follow her in the kitchen.

"Alright, this is the kitchen. A place my mom likes to call her kingdom." Emily joked with a soft snort that morphed into a squeal when her mother appeared out of nowhere.

"That’s right dear."

"Mom! You scared our guests!"

"I think you were the most scared here, honey." Emily rolled her eyes at her mother’s teasing and shook her head with an amused smile.

"Mom, they are Y/N and Maggie. Our new maids."

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Dickinson." Y/N was the first to speak up, trying to look cool when inside she was freaking out about meeting Emily again. She thought she would’ve never encountered her again.

"It’s a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Dickinson."

"You are so young Maggie." Emily smiled subtly as she sunk her teeth on her bottom lip to prevent to be caught laughing about her mother being so caught up in being mad for having maids in their house that she didn’t even pay attention remember their names, since she called Y/N Maggie.

"Mom, she is Y/N. She is Maggie." Emily emphasized the word ‘she’ as she pointed to the redhead and noticed, to her surprise, that both of their guests had amusement on their faces.

"Oh sorry, I have a terrible headache and I do not have my usual laser focused attention on anything today." Emily’s mother tried to cover up her mistake with a made up lie and laughed softly to light the air up quickly.

"Ah you should see me with an headache, I don’t even walk straight. I bump into things all the time." The redhead joked before moving on telling Emily’s mother an old Irish remedy for headache.

-

After a delicious dinner her mother prepared Y/N and Maggie disappeared into the kitchen to clean everything up, despite her mother’s protests, who in the end stayed still in her loveseat in the living room. The whole family stayed about an half an hour to chat, before everyone called it a night, saying goodbye to Sue and Austin, before going upstairs to sleep. Emily stayed in the living room a little bit more to pretend to read, staring at the words written on her book, as she waited for the perfect moment to ‘casually bump’ into Y/N before she could go to sleep in her room. Luckily she didn’t have to wait too long. "Go to bed aunt Maggie. We are almost done. I can finish the last touches myself."

"Are you sure?" Emily could hear the hesitation in Maggie’s tone, not wanting her niece to finish alone, but she could already picture Y/N protest with a resolute nod despite not knowing the girl at all except for a few details they shared a few days prior.

"I am sure auntie. Go. I will finish this up quickly and I will go to sleep too."

"Okay munchkin. Don’t wear yourself out. We have to wake up early tomorrow for breakfast."

"I won’t. Goodnight auntie."

"Goodnight Y/N/N." Emily immediately moved herself from her position on the loveseat as she was leaning over to take a small peak from the kitchen and eavesdrop as good as she could and pretended to casually read before Maggie could catch her. "Oh Miss Dickinson, still up?"

"Oh hey, Maggie. Yeah, I couldn’t sleep so I decided to read for a bit hoping sleep to find me."

"Ah, you should try the concoction my uncle used to make me when I couldn’t sleep. It was disgusting but it always made me sleep like a baby." Maggie delivered another one of her great and funny anecdotes to give her personal advice and Emily smiled kindly up at her as she caressed the pages of her book.

"One of these days you could make me some and we will see if it works for me too!"

"Alright. Goodnight Miss Dickinson."

"Goodnight Maggie." Emily smiled widely at the redhead before watching her walk up the stairs until she disappeared behind the wall. Emily stayed still for a few more seconds, listening for Maggie’s room’s door to close before immediately closing her book and sitting up, placed the book back in its designated place and almost sprinted into the kitchen, excited to finally spend some time alone with Y/N. She had been trying to do that for the whole evening, but she always had something to do with someone always in the way.

"Spying on people is wrong Miss Dickinson." Emily jumped up in fright as she had been caught staring from the threshold of the kitchen Y/N putting the plates they used during their dinner in the cabinet on top of the counter.

"Sorry, I was watching you work."

"Yeah, I noticed it." Emily smiled as her teeth sunk in her bottom lip at Y/N’s sarcastic counter back and walked into the kitchen, stopping right in front of Y/N, the kitchen’s wooden table separating them. The fire in the fireplace was still crackling softly in the silent room, bathing the room with an orange light that highlighted Y/N’s Y/E/C irises and almost made Emily faint at such ethereal beauty.

"Have you finished yet? You must be tired."

"I am, just a bit, but I am almost finished."

"Do you need some help?" Emily asked in hope Y/N would say yes, so she could prove to her she wasn’t the snotty rich girl that didn’t want to help in her house with chores. She didn’t exactly know why, but she just wanted to do it.

"No don’t worry. Aren’t you tired?"

"Not at all, I tend to have a lot of energy at night."

"Oh so you sleep during the day?"

"Not really. I am not a morning person, but I don’t oversleep."

"Oh I see." Emily detected a sarcastic lilt in Y/N’s tone and immediately wanted to prove to Y/N she wasn’t a lazy person.

"I swear I am not! Do you remember when we met a few days ago? It was around 7 a.m.! That was early in the morning!"

"Yeah, but I also remember that after that you forgot your buckets at the well." Y/N teased making Emily drop her jaw on the floor flabbergasted, making Y/N snort under her breath.

"I-I was distracted! I wanted to get them back but my mother prevented me to and did it herself."

"Yeah, I saw her." Y/N still had an amused grin on her lips but Emily could see the entertainment in her eyes that made Emily realize she was just messing with her and for a mysterious reason Emily wanted her to keep going, she wanted to be the subject of her teasing and entertainment just to see her smile.

"I tried to find you again at the well the next few days but I never did."

"Yeah, I was busy in the house helping Mr. Peterson with packing all his family’s stuff for their moving."

"Oh, yeah. That makes sense." Emily nodded in understanding before detaching her eyes from Y/N’s magnetic ones and focused instead on her wringing hands.

"Did you finish Dante’s Divina Commedia?"

"Yeah, last night actually. This morning I tried to find something new to start but nothing piqued my interest." Emily admitted after moving her gaze back on Y/N, who now placed the cloth she had previously in her hands neatly folded on the table.

"Ah I see. It happens to me all the time."

"Do you have some recommendations?"

"Hm, I need to think about it. I am a little bit tired and I can’t actually think about anything worth your while right now." Y/N chuckled after finishing speaking as she shyly made her way towards Emily, who stood a few feet from her.

"Oh then I won’t keep you away from sleeping."

"No, no. Don’t worry. I like talking to you but for now, as late as it is, I would like to keep our conversation as simple as possible."

"That’s fine by me."

"Do you want to stay here or-."

Emily didn’t let Y/N finish as she spoke up without thinking, blurting words out without any control, "we can go up to my room."

Y/N seemed taken aback for a few quick moments before a mischievous grin replaced the confused frown she had on, "oh I see where this is going."

"What-? OH! NO, NO, NO, NO! Y/N!" Emily exclaimed in shock before slapping Y/N’s shoulder gently, watching as she snickered under her breath at her joke.

"What?! It was a legit reaction from me!"

"I am not trying to seduce you!" But I would like to. Emily thought wistfully in her head as she tried to look as shocked as she felt a few seconds prior instead of looking like a kicked puppy yearning for cuddles.

"That’s not what your words sounded like Miss Dickinson."

"Ugh, you are unbelievable!"

"Let’s go now." Y/N shook her head with a small chuckle, making Emily’s heart clench at her cuteness.

"I-Okay. But it’s not done!"

"Whatever, now let’s go!"

"Okay, okay. Relax." The two made their way up the stairs as quietly as they could since everyone was already asleep and as soon as Emily closed the door behind herself, she felt butterflies fly around her stomach in excitement. She was with Y/N, in her bedroom, alone.

"Nice room." Y/N admitted as she took Emily’s bedroom in, walking around the small room to try to take in as much details about Emily as she could in the softly lit room.

"Thank you. You can sit on my bed, you are tired. I will take the chair."

"I can’t sit down Emily. I am your maid."

"I don’t care."

"I am serious Emily. It won’t be a problem-." Emily stopped Y/N mid-sentence by walking towards her and stopping right in front of her before placing her hands on her shoulders and pushing her gently backwards until the back of her knees touched her mattress, then she pushed her down and made her sit on the bed.

"There, it wasn’t so bad, was it?" Emily smirked proudly down at a shocked Y/N and following the bold thrill she had been hit on, she sat right beside Y/N and bumped their shoulders together.

"You are always so full of surprises Miss Dickinson." Y/N admitted and Emily called herself crazy because she saw Y/N blush slightly under the soft light coming from the fireplace. It must be her infatuated mind playing her games.

"It’s something you need to get used to from now on."

"Hm, I like it though."

"I’m glad to hear that." For a moment they just stood there, sat in silence in Emily’s room, gazing into each other’s eyes as small smiles adorned their features.

"I noticed all those small scraps of paper on your desk, what are those for?"

"Oh I write my poems on them. I am actually working on a poem right now."

"Are you serious?"

"Very." Emily nodded and smiled as she pushed her chest up proudly, "do you want to read a few things I’ve written?"

"Oh yeah! Absolutely!"

"Okay then." Emily sat up from her bed and walked towards her desk, opened the small drawer and grabbed a few poems she was sure Y/N would’ve liked, of course she didn’t grab the few ones she wrote about her.

"Wow, there are so many!"

"Yeah!" Emily smiled brightly like a kid on Christmas Day, just like every time she talked about her poems, and watching Y/N’s eyes fill with excitement warmed her heart.

"I can’t wait to read them!"

"Okay, which one do you want to start with?"

"I don’t know, you are the poet. You should tell me."

"I- I don’t actually know! Let me think- I want you to start with-." Emily trailed off to pick one out of the five ones she brought to Y/N as she sat back down on the bed, "this one, but then I also want you to read this one first." Emily pointed to another poem with her pointer finger as she held the previous poem she choose in her hand and smiled sheepishly at Y/N.

"Okay, let’s try with this. What is the poem you are the most proud of. Don’t think too much. Just point at it."

"Okay, hm- this one then."

"Alright." Y/N grabbed the poem Emily gave her and opened the small folded up paper, reading the words written in Emily’s elegant but a bit messy handwriting. The edges of the paper were a little bit dirty with ink but it only made the poem ten times better, full of raw emotions and vulnerability.

"What do you think?" Emily asked anxiously after a few minutes passed by and Y/N haven’t opened her mouth yet, her Y/E/C irises glued on the small piece of paper and her face completely blank, making reading her face a really difficult task for the poet.

"I-I-. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever read, Emily. It’s so raw, so real. It opened my mind to new possibilities, it made my eyes see the world from another point of view. It felt like I was in your mind and I could see the world how you see it."

"Do you think so?"

"Absolutely!" Emily felt tears prickle behind her eyes at Y/N’s words, something really rare despite how emotional Emily was about her poems. She was very proud of them and when people complimented them it only helps to boost her self-esteem but it never happened that just a few words made her almost cry. Y/N was really special.

"Thank you. Truly." Emily smiled appreciatively at Y/N as she tried with all her might to not cry in front of Y/N. "No one ever complimented my poems that way."

"Well people are dumb and stupid. You are an amazing writer and your poems will change lives." Emily smiled bittersweetly at that as she picked at a thumbnail nervously. Those words. She recalled them being said by Sue.

"Yeah, I already heard that. Someone already told me."

"And why do you not believe in them?"

"It’s not that I don’t believe in them." Emily started slowly, swallowing the small lump that immediately formed in her throat as her mind filled with memories of Sue, of all the great time she spent with her, of how much she cared for her. "It’s just that- the person that told me that doesn’t tell me those words anymore."

"Why? Did they change their minds?"

"No absolutely not. We just- grew apart I think. She has a new life now. I’m not a part of it anymore."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Y/N asked in a soft voice, leaning her head to the side, in a cute manner Emily noted, and looking at Emily with a gentle gaze as soon as she noticed the poet’s sad expression on her features.

"Not right now. I will, I trust you. I just- I don’t want to ruin the mood or like- annoy you."

"You won’t ever annoy me Emily Dickinson. You have such a way with words that you make listening to you alluring." Emily felt her eyes prickle slightly with unshed tears again as she listened to Y/N’s words and smiled appreciatively at her.

"I- I don’t know what to say. I-thank you."

"You don’t need to thank me Emily. I mean that. I hope you know I am sincere."

"I know, I can sense it from your voice and your eyes." Emily pointed her words out with her brown eyes as she glued them to Y/N’s Y/E/C irises, noticing Y/N swallowing almost imperceptibly at the bold gesture but decided to not comment on it.

"You know-." Y/N started after a few moments of them just staring into each other eyes, both feeling the air around them charge with an unknown electricity but not dwelling or thinking about it too much, but got cut off by a big yawn. She promptly covered her mouth with her hand before placing it back on her lap and smiling embarrassedly at Emily with a small blush on her cheeks, "sorry, I am a bit tired."

"Don’t apologize. I should be the one apologizing for keeping you up this late at night after the busy day you had. Not to mention the busy early day you will have tomorrow. Shit, I am so sorry." Emily grimaced after she realized she had been keeping Y/N from her well-needed sleep, but Y/N, the cute self she is, only shook her head gently.

"No, no, no, Emily. It’s fine. I wanted to spend some time with you too."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive." Y/N smiled widely at Emily before starting to get up from her bed, "well, I should go to sleep now. I need to be up at 6 a.m. to start preparing breakfast."

"Do you need some help with that tomorrow morning?"

"Another one of these questions. Hm, are you sure you really needed a maid? You seem to want to do all these chores by yourself." Y/N questioned with a mocking tone as a small, entertained smirk appeared on her lips, mirth clear in her Y/E/C irises as they eyed Emily teasingly.

"I just-." Emily trailed off to ponder her options. She could easily lie about her real intentions behind her question or she could be bold for once and actually tell she just want to spend as much time as she could with Y/N to get to know her. She decided to be bold for once. She was tired not listening to her heart’s desires. "I like your company and I really want to spend more time with you."

"Oh Emily, we will spend more time together, I promise. My aunt Maggie established a few shifts between us. I have an early morning but I work till 6 p.m., then I’m done for the day. We can do something together after dinner like tonight." Y/N suggested as she idly played with her fingers, anticipation filling her whole body as she waited for Emily’s reaction to her suggestion.

"That would be great!" Emily exclaimed excitedly and had to really stop herself from jumping up and down in happiness at the prospect of spending more time with Y/N, just sticking on grinning widely at Y/N, who did the same.

"Okay then. Goodnight." Y/N nodded towards Emily and turned around to open the door, before turning her head back around to look at Emily once again, waiting her answer.

"Goodnight Y/N. Sleep well."

"You too."

Y/N opened the door completely and exited the room, smiled at Emily one more time before closing the door, sauntering into her room, across from her aunt’s one. As soon as the door closed, Emily sighed out dreamily and let herself fall on her mattress with a dopey smile on her lips, the soft thud filling the silence in the room. "Y/N." She whispered under her breath before closing her eyes and let her mind be filled with images of Y/N as she let sleep take over her.

-

"Good morning!" Emily exclaimed as soon as she entered the living room, her face illuminated by a big grin that lighted up the whole room, making her whole family, already seated at the table, look at her curiously.

"Someone is in a great mood today." Edward pointed out after he pushed his newspaper down and took a look at her daughter.

"I just slept good, that’s all."

"You are right on time honey, I was just telling your father that Austin and Sue will join us for dinner tonight again." Emily spit the sip of tea she was drinking at the news, not noticing the small snort that left Y/N’s mouth as she served the poet her breakfast, luckily only Emily heard that.

"What?"

"Isn’t it amazing? It’s been too long since they had been here with us. They are so busy with their sophisticated parties these days. It’s a rare occasion having them joining us for two nights in a row."

"Parties I am paying." Edward pointed out making Emily grunt in acknowledgement. She was avoiding Sue at all costs and she was glad the night prior they were all busy chatting, it made avoiding Sue easier.

"Parties we are not invited to. Em you are Sue’s best friend, why don’t you ask her to invite us?" Lavinia lamented with a whining tone, pushing gently on her sister’s shoulder but then crossing her arms stubbornly when Emily just gently shook her head.

"She has new friends now. She is not interested in hanging out with us anymore." Y/N couldn’t help but notice the bittersweet tone Emily used as she addressed her sister’s question and the sad expression that flitted over her features for just over a second before it got covered by a calculated blank expression, but she couldn’t dwell on it too much as she kept serving breakfast to the Dickinson family, so she made a mental note to ask Emily about it that night.

"Speaking of friends, Emily!" Emily’s mother caught the poet’s attention and continued only when she met her eyes, "I met George this morning at the grocery store. He is such a nice guy."

"I know where this is going mom. I’m not going to marry him. He is a great friend. That’s all." Y/N missed Emily’s mother counter back and she didn’t hear the rest of the conversation going between Emily and her mother as she returned to the kitchen to tidy up the kitchen a bit before starting up lunch, not having the time to notice her stomach jumping up in happiness at Emily refusing to marry her friend.

-

"Are you sure? I can help you with all this mess."

"Oh don’t worry Y/N/N, go get some rest. You had a very stressful day. It’s my turn now." Maggie assured her niece, waving her off as she tidied up the kitchen after the Dickinson’s dinner. "No, don’t try to convince me. Go!"

"Thank you. Goodnight."

"G’night."

Y/N exited the kitchen to go up the stairs and to her room, but unfortunately she had to pass by the living room where the Dickinson family was still chatting after their dinner. Y/N sighed out of relief when no one seemed to notice her presence and kept minding their business and continued her quiet way up the stairs, a little bit sad that she probably won’t spend some time with Emily like they planned. Despite good mood being slightly dampened by hers and Emily’s plans ruined, when she arrived at her door she sighed out wistfully at the mere thought of finally getting rid of her devilish corset and lay on bed, but before she could open the door a hand touched her shoulder and squealed in fright. "Shit- Emily!"

"Sorry, sorry! I thought you heard me." Emily reasoned with an apologetic grimace, warming Y/N’s heart at the cute sight when she turned around and was met with puppy dog eyes.

"No, I was just thinking about getting rid of my corset."

"Oh I know the feeling. Looking forward on breathing normally again, hm?" Emily joked, making Y/N snort softly as she nodded in agreement with the poet.

"You have no idea."

"I have actually, because I need to get rid of my corset too. I can’t stand having it on me for one more second. Do you mind if I change in my night gown and then we can hang out?"

Y/N looked a bit taken aback from the question, not really expecting it from the brunette, "don’t you have your entire family downstairs?"

"Yeah, but they will be fine. I spent enough quality time with them, now it’s time to spend some quality time with you." Emily admitted with the slightest rosy tint on her cheeks and for once she was grateful for the lightly lit hallway so she can hide it from Y/N, who didn’t seem to notice Emily’s shy behavior.

"You make me feel too special Emily. Choosing me over your family, wow- that’s flattering." Y/N felt the need to half joke with her hand on her heart as she tried to not show how much touched she was by Emily’s words, since she only met the poet a few days prior and she was her maid.

"Get used to it! Now let’s go, I’ll help you with your corset then you’ll help me with mine."

"Hm, so eager to see me naked. Are you trying to seduce me Miss Dickinson?" Emily felt her face heat up in a millisecond at the question, not sure this time she could hide it from Y/N, her heart skipping a beat before starting beating fast in her chest as her mind filled with completely not innocent images of a naked Y/N on h-. "Emily? Are you okay?"

"Oh- I- I was-wasn’t. I was just trying to help, y’know since corsets are so difficult to take off. I always ask Lavinia to help me because I can’t reach the strings behind me, but she is busy right now so sh-."

"Emily, it’s okay. I was kidding, relax." Y/N giggled softly under her breath and bumped her left shoulder with Emily’s one to help the girl calm down, effectively stopping her ramblings.

"Oh I- I knew that." Emily laughed awkwardly for a few moments before clearing her throat, "should we, I don’t know go in your room or-?"

"Oh yes, let’s go, so I can help you undress." The last part of Y/N’s phrase sent Emily’s brain out of control as it replayed those words over and over again and each time it only helped melting her brain into mush as far from innocent images filed in.

"O-okay, let’s go." Y/N nodded and opened her bedroom door, letting Emily in first then following her, closing the door a moment later to have some privacy.

"How was dinner?" Y/N asked as she tried to look as nonchalant as she could despite having a really pretty girl in her bedroom about to undress her. Okay that totally sounded really dirty and out of context it could sound like what it actually sounded like, but we all know the truth, right?

"It was good. I liked your special bread recipe, you need to teach me how to make it."

"Oh yeah, it’s actually aunt Maggie’s recipe, but I added a little bit of raisins to enhance its flavor."

"They definitely do their work because it was the best bread I’ve ever tasted. Do not tell my mother that." Emily was quick to whisper the last part with the hand on the left side of her mouth, making Y/N laugh heartily at her goofiness.

"Noted." Y/N nodded as she still smiled widely at Emily, before starting playing with her fingers nervously. "Hm-."

"What?"

"I- I really can’t resist another second in this. Can you please-?" Y/N trailed off, letting the half-finished question hang in the electrified air between them as she stared at everything around the room but at Emily’s magnetic brown irises, moving her hands to signal behind her back to hint at Emily she needed to take off her corset.

"Wha- OH! Your corset. Of course. Yeah. Yeah." Emily nodded as she stumbled over her words, grimacing inwardly at her awkwardness. "Hm- turn around please. I’ll help you out."

"Oh yeah, thank you." Y/N held her breath as she turned around and almost gasped out loud when a pair of slightly cold hands touched the skin of her back.

"Sorry, my hands are a bit cold."

"Don’t worry." Y/N let out in a breath as she tried to calm herself down and not look like she was actually melting under Emily’s touch. After a few moments, Emily succeeded in loosening the strands of Y/N’s corset and the girl visibly relaxed, "letting your corset loose is like- the best feeling ever, right?"

"Yeah, every night I feel like my soul comes back in my body."

"Yeah, they should be banned. Why women need to suffer this much while men wear the comfiest clothes ever created?"

Emily listened to Y/N talking as she focused on her fingers unfastening Y/N’s corset, "that’s what I’m always thinking about. I tried pants once, it was a breakthrough. Never had on something so comfy in my life. Even my night gown isn’t that comfortable."

"Wait- you had the privilege to try pants on?"

"Yeah! Of course my parents don’t know that, but yeah."

"Wow, I always imagined trying them! How do they feel?"

"Amazing! And I even tried a blouse with a vest. No corset on. Even better than having pants on." Emily admitted and watched delighted Y/N’s face illuminate like a Christmas three, full of curiosity and wonder.

"Wow, that sounds amazing." Emily focused on untying the last strand of Y/N’s corset with shaky hands even if she tried to stop her body from shaking with her nerves, the mere thought Y/N was a few beats away from being naked short-circuited her brain. "I always wanted to try men’s clothes on."

"When do you have the whole afternoon free?" Emily asked with excitement shining brightly in her eyes, almost jumping up and down in her spot in anticipation as an idea popped in her mind.

"Thursday. I start at 18 Friday afternoon then."

"Alright, I really hoped it was Thursday afternoon. My parents and Lavinia are going to some kinda spa thing my aunt Lavinia organized, I’m not going because I’m not in the mood to go, even if my mom and Lavinia have been trying to convince me for days. But now that I know we can have almost 24 hours together I’m definitely not going."

"Wait- hold on, are you serious?"

"Yeah, I can even convince them to bring Maggie with them or let her have a few days off. I think they will be back Friday night or maybe Saturday morning, I need to ask them."

"Wow, I don’t know what to say!"

"Well, my dear Y/N get ready for these days all by ourselves." Emily announced excitedly, finding the same amount of excitement she had in her eyes into Y/N’s Y/E/C irises, warming her heart to no end. She was afraid she could come off as too eager to spend some alone time with Y/N, but the Y/H/C girl didn’t seem to mind or she didn’t pay attention to it and it reassured Emily.

"I can’t wait." Y/N exclaimed excitedly before shivering slightly as cold air hit her hot skin, "I should put something on quickly."

"Oh yeah, it’s freezing!"

The two girls stayed looking at each other for a few more seconds before Y/N moved her gaze away to find something to put on, Emily quickly turning around as her cheeks warmed up and her heart beat loudly in her ears. "Okay, we can go now."

"Oh thank God, I seriously need to get rid of this corset as well."

"We better hurry up then." Y/N snickered at Emily’s whiny tone, ushering her out her room.

"Have you ever thought-." Emily stopped in her tracks when, after looking at Y/N for a moment on her way out Y/N’s room, she turned back around to look where she was going to not trip over something and she was met with a pair of familiar eyes.

"Emily."

"Sue." Y/N exited the room right behind Emily and stopped in her tracks too when she was met with Sue’s confused and also a little bit… jealous? - Y/N couldn’t tell - eyes, but she sure she could feel a little bit of electricity palpable in the air, especially when Sue detached her eyes from her and stared Emily down with an hard gaze, silence filling the small hallway for a few long moments.

"I- I hoped we could talk a bit. It’s been a while."

"Oh- can we do it tomorrow? I am a bit tired."

"Oh- oh y-yeah, s-sure. How is it going with your poems?" Sue asked with a bit of a shaky voice, her eyes full of a nostalgic glint that intrigued Y/N to no end.

"It’s going just fine. They are my safe place where I can hide when I need to be away from the world."

"Yeah, I remember. They were the most powerful way for your heart and mind to speak out loud. I miss them." Sue admitted with a nostalgic tilt in her tone that kept fueling Y/N’s curiosity about the strange dynamic that Emily and Sue shared.

"Well you decided you didn’t want them anymore. So it’s a bit hypocritical missing them, don’t you think?"

"I- I- uh, that’s why I wanted to talk to you." Sue started with her voice full of anxiety and anticipation, "it’s been too long and I-."

"You were pretty clear the last time we spoke to each other. If you want to tell me about your amazing parties and your new friends, fine. But if you want to say anything else, you don’t need to worry. There is nothing else to say."

"I-." Sue sighed out loud while her shoulders lost their tension and slumped back in their position, "I guess you are right. I have no right to want to make amends after what I did and said. I just miss my best friend."

"What? Aren’t your new friends enough? This explains your need to always want more."

"I guess I deserved that." Sue hung her head down a few beats before meeting Emily’s eyes again, "I didn’t want this. Us fighting."

"I didn’t want this too. I- listen, we will talk. Tomorrow. Okay?"

"Thank you." Sue went to hug Emily but she stopped in her tracks when she stepped back and shook her head a bit.

"Right. I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

"Have a good night Mrs. Dickinson." Y/N chimed in for the first time since they bumped into Sue and smiled politely at the girl who looked her up and down before smiling politely too and nodding back.

"Have a good night too-."

"Y/N." Y/N finished for Sue, who trailed off waiting for the Y/E/C girl to help her out.

"Y/N." Sue repeated before turning around and going down the stairs where chatter was still going animatedly. Y/N watched the brunette’s back a few seconds as her mind replayed everything that went through in the last couple of minutes before focusing her attention back on Emily, finding her already looking at her, making her heart skip a beat.

"Hey." Y/N started with a soft voice, her smile widening when Emily grinned gently at her.

"Hey. Sorry you had to witness that." Emily apologized as she opened her bedroom door and lead them in her bedroom.

"That’s fine. Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Emily sighed out loud and nodded gently at the Y/H/C girl while closing her bedroom door. She stared a few seconds at Y/N before turning around, "can you help me?"

"Yeah sure." Y/N’s voice was a slightly bit hoarse as she walked on shaky legs towards the poet, who was standing in the middle of her bedroom, but she paid her no mind as her brain played the conversation she had with Sue a few minutes prior.

"I can’t believe she told me those things. She had no right to tell me those things!"

"I’m sorry Emily but I don’t know what you’re talking about."

"You’re right. I will tell you after getting out of this damned corset."

"I feel you." Y/N snorted as she started unfastening the knots on Emily’s corset to help her out of it faster, the poet already sighing out happily.

"Oh yes. This is wonderful." Emily moaned out in delight as soon as she felt the corset starting to loose around her upper body, creating a tingling sensation all over Y/N’s body at the unexpected sound, but she kept going instead of fainting embarrassingly behind Emily.

"Yeah, I feel you."

"I hope one day we can get rid of these things. They are awful." Emily admitted and watched as Y/N nodded in agreement when she turned her head around slightly to Y/N behind her still working on unfastening her corset’s straps.

"Yeah. It will take a lot but I’m sure they won’t be used anymore."

"We would wear something similar, maybe something that doesn’t feel so tight and that doesn’t need help to take it off."

"Oh wow, that would be wonderful. I still struggle trying to take it off myself." Y/N snorted under her breath as she shook her head.

"Wait, do you really take it off yourself?"

"Well yeah, most of the times I ask my aunt Maggie to help me, but a few times I had to do it myself when she is still busy or not around in that moment."

"Wow." Emily exclaimed, but furrowed her eyebrows when she heard Y/N chuckle under her breath, "why are you laughing?"

"Because I remembered I once struggled so much in taking my corset off that I didn’t see the bed and fell down on it and then on the floor." Y/N explained, giggling after finishing with Emily doing the same as she imagined the hilarious scene, "here you go. I’m done. You’re free from your corset."

"Oh yes! Thank you!" Emily moved without properly thinking and pushed the top of her dress and her corset down to her hip as she turned around, exposing her upper body to Y/N, who widened comically her eyes as they inevitably fell on Emily’s exposed chest. "Oh my God!"

"Oh- sorry, sorry!" Y/N immediately turned herself around and covered her eyes as a deep, burgundy blush fell on her cheeks. "Sorry for looking I- hm." Y/N cleared her throat and tried to find the right words that would not make this situation even more embarrassing but her brain seemed to be stuck in a spiral of images of Emily’s round and full breasts and was incapable of forming coherent thoughts, so she decided to just shut up.

"No, no. Don’t apologize. I should be sorry for- flashing my tits in your face." Emily turned around too, making now both of their backs face each other, and touched her cheeks to try in vain to subdue her scorching blush, while frantically searching her night gown to put on.

Y/N snorted imperceptibly under he breath and let the next, murmured words slip out of her mouth without her consent, "I should thank you instead."

It was almost imperceptible, but Emily caught it since the wired silence surrounding them was almost deafening and it made her stop in her tracks as she opened her drawer. She couldn’t have heard right, could she? Do those words mean Y/N felt something for her too? Or maybe that she was at least attracted to her? She needed answers. "I’m sorry again. I wasn’t thinking."

"Don’t worry. I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable."

"Are you serious? I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable." Emily countered back as she carefully took her dress and corset down her body, then putting her night gown on, purposefully choosing one that has a slight see-through fabric around her chest area. This way she could know if Y/N was interested in her in that way or not. If her eyes struggled to not stay focused on her chest, maybe she had a chance with her. "You can turn around."

"So, what happened with-." Y/N did as Emily told her but stopped mid-sentence when Emily turned around and she almost flashed her breasts to her again. The top half of Emily’s dress’ fabric was see-through, that much so that Y/N could see Emily’s erect nipples, but she wasn’t sure they were erect from the cold of the room despite the fire crackling on the right side of the room or from something else. Y/N immediately noticed her slip up and her ogling and forced her eyes to look at a portray on Emily’s wall, beside her head, instead as she cleared her throat, forcing herself to not stare at Emily’s visible chest again, "hm- with Sue?"

"Oh yeah, right, hm. Can I trust you?"

"Emily of course. I promise your secrets are safe with me."

"No, I know it. It’s just- nobody knows about this but- we had a thing going on." Emily admitted quickly, not exactly knowing how to put into words what she wanted to say, extremely afraid to watch Y/N’s facial expression at her revelation, so as soon as she finished talking, she focused her eyes on the fire crackling on her left and played around with her fingers.

"Oh wow."

"Yeah."

"Did you love her?" Y/N asked after a few beats of silence, completely taking Emily off guard.

"Wow, I wasn’t expecting this question."

"Sorry, it was too personal. You don’t have to answer me."

"No, I didn’t mean it like that. I-hm, I was expecting you- well I don’t know what I was expecting. Maybe you asking about our arrangement. Or maybe not reacting this well about this- new information about me."

"Oh yeah, I got it. You don’t have to worry about that. Like ever. I- I know what it feels like to like- love a woman."

Emily had to rectify her previous statement. That took her off guard. "Really?"

"I realized it when I was 15. I started working with my aunt Maggie in a beautiful house. Their owners were a wonderful family. Always so polite, never getting angry, very sweet with me since I was a kid but also with my aunt Maggie. They were treating us like we were part of their family. But Molly. Molly was the sweetest of them. Not to mention beautiful. We were close since we were the same age. But- hm- you were lucky enough to have some kind of something with the person I presume you loved. I wasn’t that lucky. I had to endure watching her loving someone else. For the entirety of my time as a maid in their house."

"I’m so sorry Y/N." Emily butted in as soon as Y/N, after turning around towards the fireplace, trailed off to stare blankly at the fire, too caught up in her thoughts to notice Emily approaching her slowly.

"Don’t be. It happens. Especially in the world we live in. Where people like us has to hide."

"I hope one day we don’t have to." Emily admitted a little bit wistfully, her heart aching for the pain she can clearly see in Y/N’s Y/E/C eyes when she finally looked into her brown ones. She had been lucky enough to at least act on her feelings somehow. Y/N hasn’t been that lucky.

"I hope that too." Y/N smiled gently at Emily, their eyes meeting a few seconds before Y/N’s Y/E/C one’s focused on the fireplace again.

"Did you tell her how you felt?"

"Oh God, no. Are you crazy? She would’ve ruined my life, my reputation, I could have lost my job."

"Yeah, but you broke your heart that way."

"Yeah. It will heal, eventually." Y/N shrugged like it was nothing, "it’s already healing."

"How long has it been since it happened?" Emily asked a little bit sadly, her eyes conveying as much compassion and sympathy she could to try to make Y/N feel a little bit better. Little did she know she was already making her feel better by healing her broken heart.

"About two years."

"Wow." Emily exclaimed as her brain wrapped itself around this new piece of information. She didn’t know what to say to Y/N to help her make her feel better, she had been broken hearted by Sue, but they at least had some kind of relationship.

"Woman full of words I must say. It must be easy being a poet."

Y/N’s joke made Emily snort under her breath, a gesture that she hoped distracted Y/N enough to not make her see the blush she triggered with her words. "Shut up. I was just shocked." Emily pushed on Y/N’s left shoulder when she snickered under her breath and pretended to be offended.

"Oh no, don’t be mad. I was joking. Well- not completely but- HEY! Don’t hit me with your pillow."

"Or what?" Emily smirked widely when, without Y/N noticing, grabbed the pillow laying on the chair beside her and lifted it up to hit the Y/H/C girl, but before Y/N could form any sort of warning, she got blocked by Emily swinging the pillow forward and hitting her on the face.

"Ok, you asked for it." Y/N stopped another hit with her right arm while she fumbled behind her to grab a pillow on Emily’s bed and as soon as her hand wrapped itself around the soft pillow she flung it around and hit Emily right on the face, stopping her movements altogether as she stared with a shocked but amused expression on her face at Y/N.

"You. Didn’t."

"Oh I did. I can do it again if you want."

"Don’t you dare! No! Y/N!" But it was too late. As soon as Emily finished threatening Y/N, a pillow hit her face and made her stumble a bit, but she regained her balance quickly and flung her pillow at Y/N, hitting her on her arm.

"Alright, alright. Truce." Y/N placed the pillow back on the bed and waited with an entertained smirk on her lips for Emily as she mirrored her gesture and placed the pillow onto Y/N’s one on the mattress.

"Anyway, before someone interrupted me, I was gonna say I am sorry for what you went through."

"It’s in the past now. I’m finally healing. I’m finally moving on." Y/N admitted, a slight rosy pink tinting her cheeks, something that didn’t go unnoticed from Emily but the poet decided to not ask anything about it, for now.

"I'm so happy to hear that."

"Yeah. It’s not that easy, but I will be fine. Hopefully soon." Y/N admitted with a shy smile, a gesture that Emily mirrored as she nodded in understanding.

"Good, you deserve to be happy."

"Yeah, you too. Speaking of which, how about you?"

"What about me?"

"You two had a thing going on. It must be painful calling everything off."

"It’s actually going good. I missed her a lot since we stopped our thing, but it got better in the end."

"I’m glad to hear that." Y/N smiled widely at Emily and nodded, igniting a fire within Emily that she thought it was extinguished when her thing with Sue was over.

"I- hm." Emily trailed off to ponder her next words carefully, not completely sure she wanted to admit out loud and to Y/N what she wanted to say. After a few beats of silence she made up her mind and decided she wanted to be brave, she wanted to take a shot and discover if Y/N actually liked her more than a friend. "I met someone. I- she made me feel things I thought I only felt with and for Sue."

"Oh." Y/N cleared her throat, successfully getting rid of the jealous lump it formed in her throat at Emily’s admission, but as hard as she tried no other words left her mouth.

"Yeah."

"How is- she?" Y/N stuttered, cursing herself for being so obvious about her jealousy, but it seemed Emily paid no mind to it.

"Perfect. Extremely funny, always so polite and sweet." Emily gushed uncontrollably, her eyes shining brightly with all the affection she felt for the other girl, "oh and she has a great mind too, full of ideas that fascinates me. We have a lot of hobbies in common. She is perfect."

"Wow, from what I’ve heard from your description she might be. Is she pretty?"

"No. She is beautiful."

"Already so smitten for her, hm?" Y/N teased with an arched eyebrow and a small grin to try to divert Emily’s attention on her to prevent the poet to detect her jealousy.

"How could I not? She is perfect. I think- I never felt something so hard for someone. Not even Sue."

"Does-hm-." Y/N cleared her throat when her voice wavered a bit, "does she feel the same?"

"I don’t know, but I’m trying to figure it out." Emily admitted a little bit cryptically, noticing every little reaction coming from Y/N to at least detect any kind of sign from her and if her instinct was right, she was jealous, so she maybe felt the same.

"Have you told her?"

"No. I’m a little bit insecure about it. She could feel the same but- what if she doesn’t?"

"Yeah, I know what you’re feeling. I felt the same way with Molly. I spent a year beating myself up for not telling her. Maybe we could have worked out in some way or maybe definitely not. I spent a year living on ‘what ifs’. But I have to be honest, now that I’ve moved on I think it was better that way. I don’t think she was the one for me."

"So you’re saying I shouldn’t tell her?" Emily smiled slightly at the girl rambling her thoughts out, finding all of that an extremely adorable sight witness and it became ten times cuter when Y/N blushed at her stare before shaking her head softly.

"No, what I’m trying to say is-." Y/N trailed of to take a deep breath as she stared intently into Emily’s brown eyes, "do whatever your heart craves. I’ve thought a lot about it and with a clear head I realized I was just deeply infatuated with Molly. I wasn’t actually in love with her. If it was true love I wouldn’t have moved on. So if you feel like she is the one, like you need to tell her because you truly want her, then do it. Don’t think too much about it." Emily looked at Y/N like a lovesick puppy as she talked, flaring up the fire she felt burning for Y/N, so with a made up mind and without properly thinking, as soon as Y/N finished speaking Emily surged forward and planted a soft kiss on her lips, lingering only a few seconds before pulling away abruptly, fearing Y/N’s reaction when she felt the girl completely frozen in her spot.

"I- shit- I’m so sorry- hmph." Emily got stopped abruptly when a pair of soft lips unexpectedly pressed themselves hard on her own, making her head spin out of control with a plethora of emotions she only felt when she wrote her poems. Emily felt her brain completely shutting off as she completely dived into the blissful sensation of Y/N’s mouth on hers. Their lips danced sensually over the rhythm their heartbeats set, their bodies burned from the passion the two girls shared but had to suppress for their own fears of losing the other if their feelings weren’t reciprocated, their minds were a delicious mess as their senses were completely filled with the other’s taste, perfume, essence. It was a perfect mix that both of them wished it could never end.

But Y/N had to reluctantly slow their kiss down and pull slightly away from Emily to take some needed breath as her lungs screamed for some air and she was pretty sure Emily felt if her heaving chest was anything to go by. "Do not apologize for that. Because it was so perfect."

"I was just panicking. I thought I read your signals wrong and I went too far."

"It was extremely impossible to read them wrong since I’ve been trying to not stare at your boobs for the past 20 minutes and I’ve been failing miserably." Emily snorted at Y/N’s admission, feeling a sense of pride swell in her chest as well as a familiar burning sensation in her lower stomach lighting her whole body up at Y/N’s admission.

"I think now is the right time to confess I chose this night gown on purpose." Y/N swallowed loudly when Emily winked seductively at her while puffing her chest up, giving Y/N the intoxicating view of her half exposed breasts.

"You like to torture me." Y/N murmured under her breath as her eyes never moved away from Emily’s chest, watching it move up and down with every breath the poet took and feeling her insides melt each time a nipple came in sight through the see-through fabric of Emily’s night gown.

"Why?"

"Because I can’t touch them."

"Who said you can’t?"

"Yo- wait, what?" Instead of answering verbally Emily smirked mischievously, grabbed Y/N’s wrist and pulled her hand towards herself. Just when it was hovering inches from her covered chest, she lifted her right eyebrow and silently asked Y/N if it was okay for her and smiled widely when the girl instantly nodded enthusiastically. The Y/H/C girl’s grin dropped as soon as her hand came in contact with Emily’s right breast and let out a small moan without noticing, making the poet groan at the unexpected attractive sound.

"Oh, Y/N." Emily whined and gripped Y/N’s wrist a bit more strongly when the girl squeezed her breast tentatively, but just right to light up her whole body with need.

"Come here." Y/N snaked her other hand behind Emily’s neck and pushed her harshly onto her lips to share a bruising kiss, reigniting the fire they set up a few moments prior. Y/N promptly swallowed another sound coming from Emily as she changed the angle of their kiss, full of passion but still chaste. But Emily needed more. She wanted to taste Y/N’s mouth fully. Just when Emily was debating with her mind to try to find the courage to deepen the kiss, Y/N beat her to it as her tongue licked the seam of Emily’s lips to ask for entrance. The poet granted it a few beats later with another small whine and her body got completely wrecked by a shiver running down her spine when their tongues met just as Y/N’s thumb and pointer finger found her nipple and pinched it gently but firmly.

"Oh fuck." They let their desire take over for a few minutes, giving their tongues time to explore the other’s mouth, licking every nook and cranny of each other’s mouth and swallowing every small sound they could pull from the other. As they kissed fervently, Emily’s other hand, until now placed meekly on her lap, sneaked into Y/N’s hair, after freeing them from the bun she had on all day and pulled on the Y/E/C girl’s scalp each time Y/N found a new way to stimulate her nipple or when her tongue moved just right. Their small moment was abruptly interrupted when they heard Emily’s family wishing each other a goodnight and they had to reluctantly pull away from each other, but not before sharing a few small, sweet pecks.

"I should go."

"No please, stay." Emily begged, leaning their foreheads together and sighing disapprovingly when Y/N removed her hand from her chest, only to smile widely when she grabbed Emily’s hand and intertwined their fingers together.

"I can’t. Your family is going to be upstairs any minute. We can’t get caught."

"You’re right." Emily sighed and nodded gently. Y/N had a point. "With Sue it was easier. My parents always let her sleep with me."

"Already talking about your ex with me Dickinson? Are you trying to make me jealous?" Y/N teased with a wide grin that widened when Emily blushed softly and pushed her gently on her shoulder.

"No, you jerk. I just wished it was that easier with you too. We wouldn’t have to stop this." Emily murmured seductively before leaning slowly towards Y/N and capturing Y/N’s lips in a slow but sensual kiss, making it last just a few seconds to tease Y/N and smirking widely when she accomplished her mission after hearing Y/N grunt in disapproval at her pulling away from the kiss and trying to follow her lips to kiss her again. "But you have a point. You sadly need to go. When do you have some time off tomorrow?"

"Around 11 a.m."

"Perfect, meet me here. I will tell my mom I need some help with my surprisingly ripped dress." Emily winked as she stressed the word ‘surprisingly’ and felt her heart swell at the sound of Y/N’s cute giggle.

"Alright. Goodnight Emily. Sleep well." They shared another kiss full of passion before Y/N quickly slipped out of Emily’s room, just a minute before Emily’s parents walked up the stairs to go into their room, followed right after by Lavinia.

Both girls had some troubles falling asleep that night as adrenaline still pushed through their bodies still burning with their passion, but after about an hour both girls fell asleep with wide grins on their lips, excited for the next day.

-

"Good morning my dear family!" Emily entered the living room with a brighter-than-the-sun smile, making the whole family stare at her weirdly.

"Should we get used to her being in a good mood every morning?" Edward asked his wife as both looked at Emily weirdly, eyebrows furrowed and confused expression on their faces.

"I like it." Lavinia interjected and giggled loudly when Emily run towards her and hugged tightly her over the chair. After a couple of seconds she walked to her chair and sat down, immediately stuffing her face with the delicious breakfast she had in front of her on the table.

"Hm, Maggie this breakfast is amazing!" Emily murmured with her mouth full of chocolate cake, rolling her eyes back in pure ecstasy as all the flavors hit her taste buds, completely ignoring her mother’s reprimand stare.

"Thank you Miss Dickinson, but I didn’t make it. Y/N did."

"Oh really? Where did you take the recipe?" Emily’s mother spoke up in disbelief as she too took a bite of her cake and widened her eyes comically at the tasty cake.

"It’s actually mine. It’s not that difficult to make. The secret is chocolate."

"Ugh, Y/N you need to teach me how to do this." Emily requested as casually as she could, this time waiting to swallow the cake and swiping the chocolate away from her mouth before talking, to not rise her family’s suspicions of her asking Y/N to teach her how to make a cake since she always refused to help her mom in the kitchen. "It’s delicious."

"Oh please Y/N if you succeed in making Emily do anything in the kitchen I will give you a week off." Emily turned her head towards her mother and stuck her tongue out, making her mother laugh at her in amusement.

"It would be a pleasure Miss Dickinson."

-

"Miss Dickinson?" Emily asked in a mocking tone, trying to make her best impression of Y/N, on Y/N’s lips after pulling away from the bruising kiss the two shared after Emily literally flung herself into Y/N’s arms as soon as they entered her bedroom, slamming her on the door.

"I can’t call you with your first name Emily, even if you asked me to."

"I know, but it was hilarious hearing you calling me by my last name. It’s weird."

"No, weird is being in a room with your parents when all my brain could think of was how good it felt kissing you." Y/N admitted with her eyes glued on Emily’s plump lips, biting down on her own bottom lip then to emphasize her appreciation of Emily’s lips.

"Not as good as feeling your hands on me." Emily countered back, purposefully arching her back to flush their chests together but whining in frustration when their corsets and dresses prevented them to feel anything.

"Yeah, it’s pretty much a tie." Y/N joked and thanked the door behind her back holding her up when Emily giggled on her mouth and the cute sound made her almost faint. "You are so beautiful." Y/N spoke up without even noticing as she stared at the poet with a loving gaze, creating goosebumps all over Emily’s skin.

"Not as much as you Y/N. That’s the first thing I thought that day at the well. I’ve always been fascinated by the beauty of the nature, but as soon as my eyes landed on you, it was like threes and flowers never existed. It was just you."

"Shit, do not say things like that." Y/N shook her head as she bit hard on her bottom lip while closing her eyes and leaning her forehead on Emily’s one.

"Why?"

"Because it makes me want to kiss you."

"Then why are you not doing it?" It was all the validation Y/N needed. After opening her eyes for a brief moment to meet Emily’s brown irises for confirmation, finding in them only affection and entertainment, she surged forward and captured Emily’s lips in a slow kiss, full of passion. Y/N decided to keep the kiss as chaste as possible to savor the softness of Emily’s lips, caressing her back with both hands to feel Emily’s every curve she could despite the dress and corset in her way, but when Emily’s fingers dug in the back of her neck to silently ask for more, Y/N whined softly into the kiss and immediately bit down gently on Emily’s lips. Y/N shivered at the poet’s whispered whine but took advantage of that to slip her tongue into Emily’s mouth and lick every angle she could reach. "Oh."

"Shit." Y/N murmured into the kiss when her mind finally stopped spinning from Emily’s moan and shivered wildly when the poet took advantage of Y/N’s dazed state to suck harshly on Y/N’s tongue, pulling a whine from her throat. After a few moments Emily had to pull away to take some needed breath, not too far away, just enough so their noses could brush together gently. "That was so fucking hot. And fuck- that sound." Emily giggled at Y/N’s murmured words, her eyes staring lovingly at the her and a dopey smile adorned her kiss-swollen lips, and she thought about how happy she felt in that moment.

"Ugh, I wish you could stay here all day." Emily admitted out loud after a few seconds of them basking in the comforting silence, the two girls just existing together, wrapped up in each other’s arms, with their forehead leaned together and with their breaths mingling, sighing out sadly and leaning into Y/N touch when she caressed her back comfortingly.

"I know, but your mother and sister will be back with my aunt soon." Y/N sighed out sadly, caressing Emily’s sides gently as she committed to mind every small detail she could.

"Yeah and Sue will be over in an hour. We still need to talk."

"She just wants her best friend back, Emily. Give her a chance to be a good friend. You two were friends before having what you two had."

"You’re right. I want to talk to her too. I want my friend back, but I just- want to spend more time with you."

"You will, tonight." Y/N nodded encouragingly and smiled widely to hope to make Emily do the same and when she did a few seconds later her own grin widened ten sizes.

"Do not forget we have the house all for ourselves on Thursday."

"Already trying to get under my dress Dickinson?"

"Maybe." Emily winked with a mischievous grin, making Y/N laugh heartily before kissing her gently and slipping out of her room.

[itspbandjellytime]

The Assistant [Hailee Steinfeld x Reader] - Chapter 4

Plot: Y/N Waldorf is fresh out of college and her first job is being Hailee Steinfeld's personal assistant, but what Y/N doesn't know is that Hailee is hiding a huge secret from the general public and from her, as her assistant.

Notes: This is a multi-chapter fic, you can also read this on wattpad under the same username "itspbandjellytime". This fanfic is also going to contain NSFW themes in the near future, so if you're under the age of 18 please don't read this. Thank you!

CHAPTER 1 | CHAPTER 2 | CHAPTER 3

A/N

Hi... I am NOT dead, I have been going through a lot lately but don't worry, I am okay am just busy with other stuff. Also this chapter contains smut, please read at your own risk <3 Okay thanks for reading!

Word count: 3.1k words

[Y/N POV]

It's been a week or two since I moved in with Hailee and so far it's going well, we are starting to get to know each other more outside of work as if we're now bestfriends. So far I am enjoying this job, however I still can't get the room that's in that dark hallway and whatever lies in that room. I keep on thinking about it, every time I head upstairs or downstairs to grab myself a glass of water to the point I start to stir up different conspiracy theories only lunatics online can believe. 

Today is also my day off, which means I get to catch up with Jackie. Jackie and I met up at a restaurant somewhere in downtown LA, and I told her everything, yes including the room.

"Wait, so there's another room?" Jackie asks, grabbing a bite off her burger. I nod in response, bouncing my leg up and down  "Yep, I don't know what's in there and I don't want to know what's in there even though I make weird conspiracy theories to myself about what's in there." I said, scrolling through my phone. 

"Maybe it's her album?" Jackie said jokingly and we burst out in laughter, I shook my head and sighed "I wish, if it was her album I'd be leaking that in an instant... As a joke!" I said, nervously chuckling as I look around my surrounding hopefully people do not know that I work for Hailee Steinfeld. "But enough of that, how's Hailee treating you tho? I bet she's treating you like a queen or something." Jackie says, a smile forming on her face as she leans forward.

My face turns red smiling at Jackie, she's not wrong Hailee does spoil me like crazy as if I am not her personal assistant. Yesterday, while we were out and about after a meeting, she took me shopping and I saw the pair of designer shades I've wanted for so long but I couldn't buy it because it's expensive as hell. But Hailee at the end bought me the pair of designer shades that I've been visioning for quite sometime now.

"Well you're not wrong, she does spoil me like crazy." I say, I pulled out the pair of shades that she bought me and showed it off to Jackie. "She bought these for me yesterday." I giggled, putting them on. Jackie gasps knowing that it's the sunglasses I've always wanted since we we're teenagers on stan twitter. "Oh my god, it's the sunglasses you wanted!" Jackie exclaims, admiring every nook and cranny of the sunglasses on my face. All I can do is laugh and nod "I know right?" I responded, putting the sunglasses away.

"Those sunglasses suit you!" Jackie compliments the way the sunglasses suit my face and takes a sip of water, we were both silent for ten seconds and Jackie as always breaks the dead air between us.

"Are you sure Hailee isn't like... Making any moves on you?" Jackie asks, my face turns redder than the tomato sauce of the dish I am having.

"Oh Jackie... You are feeding me into my delusions once again." I laugh, rolling my eyes. Way before I got this job, Jackie and a bunch of our old twitter mutuals used to poke fun of me in a friendly manner about how much of a simp I am for Hailee and as Jackie's friend, I fire back all the time.

"I am being serious, I am not feeding into your delusions Y/N/N. She has been spoiling you left and right, you live in her house, she bought the shades you've wanted, she is making the moves on you." Jackie says to me, I roll my eyes and sighed. "Well if she was making the moves on me then I am now The President of the United States." I said, smiling as I call the waiter for the bill, Jackie smirks and shakes her head and we continue to talk as the day ends.

Hours later, I am back at Hailee's place. I just finished brushing my teeth and I am getting ready for bed, I glance at the room that's in the deep hallway. I start to get second thoughts about me trying to find what lies behind that door, or me keeping my job and not fucking shit up between Hailee and I.

I check my surroundings if Hailee is around and then I look at the room, I slowly and surely take a step closer and reach for the door knob. My legs start shaking, the palms of my hand start to form sweat, and my heart starts to beat like crazy.

"Y/N?" A voice called out to me, I turned around to see Hailee behind me. I dropped my hand down and faced her properly, wiping the sweat off my hands and nervously smile.

"Hailee, Hi!" I greeted her, nervously smiling at her "Quick question, what's in this room?" I asked her. It was a very straightforward move but I was so curious, Hailee looks at the door and furrows her brows and looks back to me.

"It's just a storage room, very boring stuff there. Nothing interesting." Hailee says nonchalantly as if it's not bothering her just one bit, all of the chaos in my brain stopped for a bit and it felt like the skies cleared in my brain.

"Oh! I see, it looks very creepy from my end that's all and I was just super curious what lies behind that door." I said, Hailee laughs and pats my shoulder giving it a squeeze.

"It's nothing, Y/N. Now you go get some rest, we got important things to discuss tomorrow, work related." Hailee says, being serious this time around and walks away from me. I didn't say a word and just nodded, cause if I speak the conversation will last for a life time. I glanced at the door and then left and went back to my room.

Three o'clock am, hours later.

I opened my eyes, my throat was dry and I start to cough. I am feeling a little thirsty and I want to drink a glass of water, cause who hasn't had that moment when you wake up in the middle of the night and you want to drink a glass of water.

I got out of bed and left my room, heading downstairs to grab a glass of water. As I walk down the halls of her house again, my eyes dart the room in the dark hallway and I noticed something. The door is barely open and I can see light coming out, the light is red. 

Wait... No... What the fuck? This better be a prank. I swallowed hard and reached for the door, slowly opening it. I gasped at what I saw, I couldn't believe my eyes "What the hell." I whispered to myself as I slowly make my way inside the room. The room looks like it's from those fifty shades of grey movies, it had ropes and chains. This made me freeze, could this be Hailee's secret? The secret that she's been hiding from the general public? Jackie probably might be right all along, God I am so oblivious- But I don't care I am still  standing for what I said and at the same time shocked.

"Y/N." I heard Hailee's voice, it sounds so stern and serious. I can tell that my job is on the line with this one, I turned around and saw Hailee in an oversized Daytona shirt leaning against the door frame. "Hailee, I can explain." I said as I put my hands up as if I was caught by the authorities. Oh god this is it... I am gonna lose my job, Hailee didn't say a word she just closed the door behind her and walked up to me.

"I think I should be the one who needs to do the explaining." Hailee tells me, putting my hands down Hailee takes a deep breath and looks into my Y/E/C colored eyes in a very sincere and serious manner. 

"I know that this is shocking to you but yes... This is what's inside the room in the dark hallway. I know that this isn't typically what you'd see from someone like me but yeah... This is the secret I have been hiding from people like my friends and family." Hailee explains with sincerity in her eyes, all I can do now is just listen to her explanation. I though the secret in question was something  very controversial, but this... This isn't even controversial or anything. "Y/N, I totally understand if you seeing this will make you change the way you think about me and if you want to quit your job I understand-"

"Hailee." I said, finally speaking up after she explained everything. "I didn't know that you'd be into this." I continued, looking at the array of whips, collars, and cuffs on the wall and back to her. "Do you do this with anyone or?" I ask her. 

Hailee simply shook her head "No, I haven't." Hailee admits to me, she pulls me in close to her our faces inches away from each other. "I haven't..." Hailee repeats, moving a strand of hair away from my face. My heart starts to beat like crazy already, I am stuck and frozen and all I can do is nod "And I want to do this with you first..." Hailee admits once again. 

"Do you trust me, Y/N?" Hailee asks me, the silence in the room is loud and the only thing I can hear is her breathing and my heartbeat. I don't know what to say at this point and at the same time I want to do it, so I responded to Hailee's question by nodding.

"No, sweetie... I want you to say it... Use your words." Hailee says, this time she caresses my cheek. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes shut, and cleared my throat "Y-yes..." I responded. A smirk forms on Hailee's face hearing that one word come out of my mouth "Good girl." She whispered, pulling me in for a heated kiss.

The way her lips crashed against mine made me melt, it felt like an out-of-body experience for me. I gave in and kissed her back, letting out moans between the kiss as Hailee deepened the kiss. She chuckles between the kiss, running her hands down my body as she pulls me closer to her "You are so responsive Y/N." Hailee mutters, trailing kisses down from my jawline to my neck. I let out a moan as I felt Hailee slide her hand inside my shirt, caressing my bare skin,

"Can I?" Hailee asks me, tugging the hem of my shirt. 

"Please." I begged.

Hailee smirked, she then proceeded to take my shirt off, so it was just me and my pajama pants "God you're so breathtaking... You look like a Goddess..." Hailee praises, grabbing a hold of my breasts and giving them a gentle squeeze making me moan. Hailee smirks at my response as she kisses my neck, kneading my breasts "I love how responsive you get when I touch you, Y/N." Hailee mutters as she pins me down the bed, her grip on my wrist isn't firm but is sure to hold me down. She gets on top of me and starts to straddle me, she reaches for the cuffs on her bedside drawer putting them on me "Is this okay?" Hailee asks as she adjusts the tightness of the cuffs on me "I want you to be honest with me, okay? I don't want to do things you're not comfortable with, darling." Hailee says once again, reassuring me. 

I look up at her and nod in response "Yes." I say, feeling comfortable with the grip of the cuffs, feeling the cool metal against my skin.

"Good girl..." Hailee nods, kissing my lips once again and then her lips trailed down from my lips, to my neck, down to my chest. She takes one of my nipples and sucks on it, swirling her tongue around it making me gasp and moan as I feel a familiar heat forming between my legs "Oh God..." I quietly moaned feeling her tongue on my nipples, Hailee looked up at me as she runs her fingers on the waistband of my pajama pants "Please, Hailee..." I begged, fully surrendering to her.

Hailee pulls down my pants and underwear in one go, tossing it aside along with the pile of clothes on the floor. Hailee looks down and bites her lower lip seeing the sight of my wet core "You're already wet, Y/N." Hailee says, stripping her clothing in front of my eyes and showing off those nice abs she has.  She spreads my legs open, caressing my inner thighs making me whimper "Whats your safe word?" She asks, lowering herself between my legs.

"Safe word?" I ask her back.

"Yeah, give me your safe word..." Hailee responds, I know a thing or two about safe words thanks to mistakenly reading a paragraph from Fifty Shades of Grey at a Barnes and Noble. 

I just look into her eyes and I swallow hard "Lamp post." I said, I didn't know what safe word to tell Hailee but thats my safe word. Hailee chuckles and looks at me again "Lamp post it is, just relax okay? It's just you and me..." Hailee says in a reassuring tone, kissing my inner thighs.

I let out a sharp gasp as Hailee's tongue licked my wet folds up and down, those gasps turned into moans and whimpers that echoed around the bedroom. The way Hailee's tongue moves is a whole other level, making me moan more and more "Hailee... Oh fuck... Y-yes..." I moan out, rocking my hips back and forth for more pressure.

"Y/N, you taste so good... Where have you been all my life?" Hailee mutters, sliding two fingers in and out of my entrance as her tongue flicks my clit making me moan more and crave her more and more. "Hailee.. Please... d-don't stop..." I moan out, Hailee smirks as she picks up her pace to the point I am squirming under the sheet of the bed.

"You like that? How does it feel to be used like this?" Hailee asks, curling her fingers inside me as she kisses my neck, picking up the pace of her fingers inside my wet heat. All I can do is just nod, I can't form any words on how I am lost in the pleasure of her fingers "Y-yes... It feels so good..." I manage to respond, looking into her hazel eyes underneath the red light of the room. 

Sweat starts to drip down my forehead, my body is glistening in sweat as well as Hailee continues to finger me. I can feel myself getting closer and closer to the edge already, my walls start to tighten around her fingers each thrust Hailee makes.

"Hailee... I'm close..." I said, letting out a series of whimpers and moans, Hailee leans closer into my ear, nibbling on it "Thats what I want to hear... Cum for me y/n..." Hailee whispers.

I arched my back, letting out a gutteral moan and screaming Hailee's name out in pleasure. My whole body starts to shake and tremble due to the amount of pleasure Hailee has given to me, Hailee looks at me and slowly pulls her fingers out of my entrance.

Her fingers are coated in my juices and she takes them in her mouth sucking them clean, letting out a satisfied moan "Y/N... You taste so good..." Hailee says, pressing her lips against mine as I taste myself on her tongue. "But I am not done with you just yet, darling," Hailee says.

I watch her get off the bed and retrieve a strap-on from her closet which made my eyes widen in shock, Hailee smirks at me as she teases my folds with the tip of the strap-on "Have you ever been fucked with a strap-on before?" She asks me. 

I respond with shaking my head "N-no..." I said, my face all red and flustered which made Hailee chuckle. "You're so adorable, Y/N. Just relax... You'll probably love it." Hailee says, I let out a gasp feeling the girth of the strap-on inside me making my eyes roll back.

"So tight..." Hailee whispers, she starts to move her hips back and forth slowly but surely making me let out more whimpers and moans. I turn away to stiffle out my loud moans but Hailee gently grabs my face, looking into my eyes as she picks up the pace "That's it, baby... Look at me... God you're so sexy whimpering and moaning for me..." Hailee says, pulling me in for another heated and passionate kiss, hitting my sweet spot repetitively making me moan between the kiss.

I can feel myself getting close once again, my heart rate starts to go insane as she continues to thrust in and out of me "H-Hailee..." I whimpered out as my walls tighten around the strap-on "I'm gonna- I- I can't..." I manage to say. My eyes widened as I climax for the second time tonight, I start to pant and shake due to the intensity and amount of pleasure Hailee has given me. Good thing she is very gentle and started to slow down her pace, Hailee kisses my neck and jawline as her movements start to slow down "Shhh..... It's okay.... You did so well, y/n...." She praises me slowly pulling the strap-on out of my wet core, removing it and tossing it aside. Hailee then takes the handcuffs off of me and I can finally move my arms and wrists.

Hailee then lies down next to me "Come here." Hailee says, gesturing for me to come a little bit closer. I move a little closer to her and she pulls the sheets up to cover our naked bodies, she wraps an arm around me and we look at each other for a while "How do you feel?" She asks me. It took me a second to respond and collect my thoughts, I just cant believe that I just had sex with my boss but not just any boss, it's Hailee Steinfeld we're talking about here.

"I... It just felt like... like..."

"Like a volcano?" Hailee asks me, a smirk forming on her face. God this woman...

I chuckle in response, nodding at Hailee's statement "Yeah... Like a volcano..." Hailee and I stayed like this for a while, she drifted to sleep and I just looked at her and I followed suite, resting my head on her chest feeling her heart beat.

[slothquisitor]

Death is a Dialogue

Summary: In which Lucanis accompanies Rook to the Grand Necropolis and has a bad time. Eventual Rook/Lucanis. 3k.

Also on AO3.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lucanis hates the Grand Necropolis. 

It’s not just that it’s dark and creepy, though that certainly doesn’t help. His eyes seem to be constantly straining to see around the next corner, to scan for threats. There’s also a pervasive almost physical weight settling into his chest the deeper the lift descends. But that’s not the worst part. The worst part about the Necropolis is how utterly thin the veil is here. It reminds him of the Ossuary and makes the backs of his eyes itch. He’s tired enough it’s hard not to be on edge. 

It’s clear that Rook is right at home here though. He doubts that she’s even aware she’s doing it, but the more she talks as they descend deeper into the Shrouded Halls, the more formal her tone gets. It’s a little bit amusing to consider that she’s been adjusting her tone for any period of time for them. He wonders which is more real to her now, which is the most authentic. 

Rook patiently answers Bellara’s many questions about where she lived, what she studied, what it was like living in the Grand Necropolis. He cannot imagine anyone wanting to live in this gloom. But it’s clear from the way Rook talks that this is home for her in the same way Treviso is his. It’s also clear from the way she fidgets that she’s feeling some type of way about being back here. He’d ask about it, but he’s pretty sure she’d insist that she’s fine. 

As they traverse the darkness, little blue wisps begin following them like strange bright jellyfish. “Uh…Rook?” 

She glances at the slowly multiplying group that bobs in their wake and lets out an exasperated sigh. “Hi, hello. It’s good to see you all too.”

At her acknowledgment, the wisps seem to bounce even more brightly and press in closer on them. He steps away, gritting his teeth. He does not like spirits, even harmless wisps. He’s had quite enough of demons and spirits for a lifetime.

Rook steps between him and the wisps that dart about inquisitively. “I think Lucanis would prefer if you all gave him a bit more distance, please.”

Well, no wonder she keeps wanting to reason with Spite because the wisps seem to listen, bobbing with more purpose around her and largely leaving him alone. He throws her a grateful look. 

“I’ve never seen so many wisps at once,” Bellara says, voice full of awe. 

“This is nothing, you should see them during the Night of Fadeweaving,” Rook replies with a smile.

“Night of Fadeweaving?” he asks. If it’s a Nevarran celebration, he’s never heard of it. 

She lets a wisp land lightly on her hand as if it’s a bird and not a Fade spirit. “Watcher holiday. Let’s keep moving.”

“They’re just going to follow us?” he asks. “Can’t you ask them to stop?”

“I think they’re fun. They’re a bit more lively than the ones in Neve’s office,” Bellara says. 

Rook’s smile tightens at the mention of Neve. “It’s best to let the wisps do as they like. Besides, they might be helpful in ensuring we get where we’re meant to go, sometimes the rooms like to move.”

The rooms do what now?

“I hope the professor is here,” Bellara says as they keep moving. She’s moving carefully as if she is afraid of making too much noise. “And that he doesn’t mind us disturbing him. He is a senior necromancer…I don’t -”

They all pause as a skeletal construct ambles past them, a pickaxe raised. This isn’t the first construct they’ve seen while here, all of them have the same portion of their skulls missing, where the wisps seem to take up residence when raised. They do not move naturally, instead ambling about as though being puppeted by someone with a particularly shaky hand. 

“Visitors!” A tall figure in Mourn Watch colors exclaims excitedly from behind a mask of skeletal necrotic magic. 

“Too. Bright,” Spite complains, and Lucanis can’t help but agree. His eyes are itching and this all feels like a waste of hard work. Why do necromancers insist on raising the dead?

“What a marvelous surprise! Any trouble with the lift? Our last guests were stuck for hours, poor souls.” The figure dismisses his mask and smiles in Rook’s direction. “Miss Ingellvar, how wonderful it is to see you again. I see you have accumulated quite the welcoming retinue. You’ve been missed.”

Rook smiles and he notices some of the tension seeping away at the warmness of the welcome. “It’s good to see you too, Professor Volkarin.”

“Hello, Professor! We’ve never met, well in person, but I’ve been writing to you!” Bellara says, extending a hand. 

“Bellara? My dear girl, what a pleasure! Surely you didn’t come all this way just to see me? And that must mean, you’re….Rook. I do beg your pardon, if I misstepped in my greeting to you.” The professor grasps Bellara’s hand in both of his own. 

Rook shakes her head. “Either is fine, really. With present company, I tend to go by Rook. And this is Lucanis, of the Antivan Crows.”

Lucanis inclines his head but doesn’t move forward. “Nice to meet you.”

“A Crow, how exciting!” The professor seems genuinely thrilled to see them, but his gaze lingers a bit too long on him before turning his attention back to Rook and Bellara.

“He’s seen,” Spite hisses. Lucanis ignores him. 

“We are actually here looking for you because you see, we need a Fade expert,” Bellara explains. 

Then there is a distant piercing scream that cuts through the relatively peaceful moment, if one can ignore the flock of skeletons digging behind them. And Lucanis definitely isn’t. 

The professor straightens his jacket and smiles winningly. “I’d be pleased to continue our conversation after I tend to some small business here. I must investigate.”

“A Watcher’s work is never done,” Rook replies with far too much enthusiasm and gestures down the hallway. 

Lucanis almost wants to stay with Bellara especially after he hears that the rooms down here sometimes rearrange themselves, but Rook had specifically asked him to come. Being here, despite how much he hates it, feels like something a friend would do. That she’d sought support from a demon and an insomniac makes him question her judgment though. 

He suspects she was worried about the way she might be treated by some Watchers upon returning home, but so far everyone has been more than polite. He wonders if there’s some Nevarran or Mourn Watch subtext he’s somehow missing, but he doesn’t think so. He knows what it’s like to be away from home for so long, and he wonders if she’s finding this place to be as she remembers it. Or like him, if going home just reminded him of the distance between who he is now and who he was. He could ask, but that seems like a question for the quiet of shared coffee and tea later, it surprises him how much the thought of that keeps him going through the gloom. 

“Is this your first time back in the Necropolis since the uprising, Rook?”

She nods. “Yeah, hear they’re calling it the War of the Banners.”

“You know how these things go,” Emmrich says. “We Watchers do love the fanfare. Though, I must apologize for your treatment after the fact. If I had been here and not in the city, I would have done everything in my power to protest treating you so terribly after your years of exceptional service and scholarship.”

Lucanis has rarely seen Rook speechless, but it’s clear that this does it. She recovers, eventually. “I appreciate that, but it all worked out. If I’d never left, I would have never been on the radar of two blighted elven gods.” It’s a forced attempt at humor, but Lucanis tries to offer her a look of encouragement anyway.

“In the wake of your departure there were very many rumors surrounding you,” Emmrich says, words clearly picked carefully. 

Rook sighs. “I bet there were.”

“I’d heard a particularly interesting one, but I’m not sure if you’ll find it distasteful.”

“Well, now you definitely have to tell me what it was.”

Emmrich’s face pinches. “Perhaps I shouldn’t have brought it up, but there were some insinuations that you were found here as a baby.”

Lucanis stops short, watching Rook as Emmrich asks the question, but then she only laughs. 

“Oh, that’s all? Yeah, inside the Ingellvar crypt. Their whole line died out dragon hunting, so there was no one to protest me taking the last name.”

“I remember the day you were found, caused quite the stir amongst the Watchers.”

Lucanis glances between the two of them in horror. “Do you mean to tell me that you were a crypt baby? How does that even happen?”

Even in the gloom, Rook’s eyes are bright with mirth. “Well, you see, Lucanis, when two undead really love each other-”

He glares at her. “Not funny.”

She snorts. “Come now, it’s a little funny.” He and Rook have very different ideas of what constitutes funny. 

Emmrich lets out a long-suffering and somewhat corrective sigh. “The peace of the Necropolis is a balm to the living and spirits alike.”

“Crowded,” Spite hisses. 

“Must be nice,” Lucanis replies, rolling his eyes at Spite. 

Emmrich looks at him directly then. “Ah, yes. I’ve noticed you’ve company.”

Mierda. “Oh?” He braces for the explanations and the arguments they’ll need to make, but Emmrich merely looks at him with compassion. 

“A spirit of determination I believe?”

“Spite,” he and Spite correct in unison. 

There’s a flash of magic further down the hallway, and Lucanis feels the telltale pain at the back of his eyes that tells him someone is using blood magic nearby. Rook glances at him in alarm. 

“Venatori,” he growls. 

“Down here? How?” Rook asks.

He stretches his neck and draws his daggers. “Maybe one of you can ask them, after we kill them.”

***

The Necropolis has always felt as though it was hers. Camina has always loved this place for everything that it is, and strangely, heartbreakingly, everything it isn’t. 

As a child, she felt called to this place. She was caught so many times sneaking in that the Guardians knew her name and the crowded group home to take her back to without needing names or directions. But when she finally got to enter the place again, officially, passed into the care of tutelage of the other Mourn Watch mages, she’d been filled with a deep emotion she could only have described as homecoming. 

She expected to be filled with that same emotion as she returned to the only place she’d ever called home, and she was flooded with a sense of familiarity, love even. She doesn’t know if something about this place has changed or if she has, but she keeps waiting for the sense of homecoming that never arrives. 

Camina feels a strange sense of disconnection the further they delve into the Shrouded Halls. Everything around her is familiar, from the undead they’re fighting, to the smell of the halls, and even Professor Volkarin’s gentle explanations for Lucanis’s sake feel like she’s heard them once upon a time. Is she thirty-two or twenty-three? This moment feels like she’s somehow lived it before. 

“I suppose that the displays of the Grand Necropolis must seem exotic to you, Lucanis,” Emmrich says as they make their way back up the levels of the Shrouded Halls. 

“‘Exotic’ is not how I would describe your dead body collection,” Lucanis replies tersely. 

Well, she supposes that not everything feels familiar. There’s also something about how clearly uncomfortable Lucanis is here that’s bothering her. She feels immediately guilty for having asked him to accompany her in the first place, and a little…hurt? Last night when he’d brought her tea and checked on her, she’d felt as though they had a connection or an understanding. There’s…something there. 

But it feels kind of silly now and she’s filled with a familiar sort of embarrassment. It reminds her of those first days in the Necropolis, being introduced to the other mages. She’d been filled with so much genuine excitement, the carefree joy of youth. Finally, she was where she was meant to be. Finally, her magic had granted her entry somewhere she could belong. Not everyone was unkind, but it had still surprised her that there were always ways to divide up people, whether it was being an elf or coming from nothing, she was too often reminded of the ways she didn’t fit. 

Emmrich shakes his head. “What’s so objectionable about a simple reanimation?”

“It’s a waste of hard work,” Lucanis replies. “I kill people so that they’ll stop talking, you bring them back to do that…with your corpse whispering.” 

His attitude is annoying her and she doesn’t bother hiding it. “Well, you didn’t seem to object that much when my bone reading helped Treviso.” They’ve just fought a legion of Venatori and a horde of despair demons, she’s too tired for this. 

Lucanis looks both sorry and a little embarrassed. “Rook…my apologies to you both, I didn’t mean to offend.”

“I appreciate the apology. I daresay both Rook and I are well-acquainted with the distrust of us and our art from those outside of Nevarra,” Emmrich replies. “‘Death is a dialogue between the spirit and the dust’, necromancy is one means of parsing it. I suppose your knives and daggers are another…just in the opposite direction.”

They’re scaling the last of the steps where they’d left Bellara, and Lucanis steps nearer to her, his voice lowered to a whisper. “Rook…I…”

“It’s fine.” She cuts him off with a shake of her head and hurries after Emmrich. What does it matter if he doesn’t understand her craft or the Necropolis when it doesn’t feel like hers anymore anyway? 

As they crest the stairs, she sees Bellara in conversation with Myrna and Vorgoth and another familiar figure approaching them, a bow on her back and armed with a truly impressive number of daggers, present company included. 

“The Venatori have been cleared out of the Sunken Tombs,” Willow Wächterin reports to the senior Watchers. 

“Will?” she exclaims, hurrying up the last of the steps. 

“Cam?”

And then she’s hugging one of her oldest friends who she hasn’t seen in too long. During the unrest, with Will being a Guardian of the Tomb they were stationed separately, and then of course, it’s been nearly a year since she left the Necropolis in the first place. Will looks the same as ever, her black hair tied up neatly in a long tail.  

“It’s good to see you,” Will says as she pulls away. “Are you back? Tell me you’re back. We’ve got oneiric disruptions happening with startling frequency and then Venatori down here of all places. We need you.”

“I’m afraid that this is just a short visit today to consult with Emmrich, but hopefully I’ll be back around a bit more often going forward,” she says, glancing toward Myrna and Vorgoth for confirmation. It’s clear that Will’s attention snags when she mentions Emmrich, but she knows her friend better than to ask with an audience. 

“A WATCHER HAS RETURNED,” Vorgoth says. That’s about as good as a welcome mat in her book. 

“I should go do another sweep of the Bell, just in case,” Will says. “Let’s catch up soon?” It’s clear that she’s in a bit of a hurry, and Cam is a bit disappointed, but there are much bigger problems than simply wanting to catch up with her friend. 

“Good hunting,” she says as Will stalks deeper into the Shrouded Halls.  

“Should she be going alone?” Lucanis asks with concern. 

“Will’s a Guardian of the Tomb, trust me when I say she’s fine,” Cam replies. Rarely mages, Guardians are selected and trained in certain rites only they can perform. Like anything in the Mourn Watch, Cam suspects it’s all shrouded in layers of mystery and tradition, but that’s the way it has always been. 

“From what Rook has explained, there is great danger to the Fade,” Emmrich explains to Myrna and Vorgoth. “I simply must assist. Ah! Thank you, Manfred.”

A rather lively skeletal construct in old Watcher livery has shuffled over to their group, a tea tray in hand. 

“Is this your assistant?” she asks. “Pleased to meet you, Manfred.”

Manfred hisses in reply, his green jeweled eyes shining. 

“IT HAS BEEN MANY YEARS SINCE YOU LEFT US.”

Emmrich nods. “Well, yes, but elven gods? Ancient magics? I couldn’t bear to miss this! Besides, I’ve spent my life exploring the Fade and speaking to spirits. If Rook needs an expert, none are better qualified than I.”

“And it’ll be nice to have a fellow necromancer along to make everyone else nervous,” she says, unable to resist glancing at Lucanis who looks away uneasily. 

The disappointment folds in on itself, and she buries it. She doesn’t have time to worry about his distrust of her magic or the Necropolis, not with cities being attacked by dragons. But still, some part of her is that young Watcher again, desperate for approval, acceptance, belonging. She should know better by now just how fleeting those things can be. 

She straps her staff on her back. “We should get back to the Lighthouse.”

[lovepersevering13]

Because I could not stop for death AO3

Here is the link to the first chapter of my AgathaRio backstory fic on AO3 "Because I could not stop for death, she kindly stopped for me"

It's inspired by Emily Dickinson's poetry and will follow Agatha and Rio from their first meeting up until whenever I run out of motivation.

[sundaynightlive]

Fresh Night Air [Book was there, it was there…](Greatwise)

Disclaimers: No age gap shit. They’re 16 and 17 respectively.

Also: I do not hate Mike or any of Will’s friends—I’m just exploring the way they might tip toe around him after all the shite he’s been through.

Realistically: I ship Byler. But I like healthy love interests MOST and whatever’s going on in ST right now is not that, so why not throw a Gareth in there?

If it’s not your thing, I get it :) I only wanted to write a sweet little happy-Will fic with LIGHT angst for like two seconds. If you’re going, have a good rest of your day <3 peace and love darlings.

If you’re staying, enjoy :)

“Gareth Emerson,” the boy introduces, and Will shakes his hand over the table. He’s still a little pissed about his friends joining another party while he was in California, but when’s the last time Mike took anything Will said seriously, ever?

He shouldn’t be surprised.

They sit back down—across from each other, no less—and turn their attention to Eddie now that they’ve all been decently acquainted. The DM claps his hands together and rubs his palms excitedly—despite Will’s initial annoyance at being completely and utterly betrayed, he actually really likes Eddie, fangs and all. He’s cool, he’s nice, and he’s the only Upside Down monster that doesn’t wanna kill or eat any of them, save for the occasional half-cup of blood that seems to satisfy him completely.

They had all been astounded at the convenience of that—blood being so filling.

Or maybe Eddie’s affliction hadn’t fully taken by the time they got his body out of the Upside Down and a troupe of federal scientists pumped him full of drugs—they aren’t totally sure.

Either way, he’s a sad excuse for a vampire, and a completely awesome dungeon master.

“Good evening, intrepid heroes, and welcome to my eighth,” Eddie pauses, as if he’s in awe of that number himself, “And best campaign yet. Drumroll, please!” Will starts a little as the boys around him (plus Erica) begin to pound on the table with their fists. Will joins them after a moment, allowing himself to grin both at the nerdiness, and the undeniable giddy excitement that’s filling his chest and shoulders.

Eddie uses his hands to push his feet up on his seat—his throne, really—and then stands, throwing his arms out wide—

“Plight of the Hellwalkers!” A cheer rises up from the table, as if any of them know what that means other than tieflings and devils and the sort. Maybe something celestial, if any of them are feeling particularly combatant. Will’s already got all these ideas forming in his brain—he’s known for being pretty creative when it comes to PC’s. Will the Wise hadn’t exactly been the height of ingenuity, but Mike hadn’t always wanted to DM a complicated character—he just wanted to run impossible dungeons and make his players sweat.

Eddie’s a different story.

Will’s running all kinds of characters through his brain when he notices Gareth looking at him. Will would’ve thought he’d be chatting with all the other boys, or even with Eddie since the two of them seem to be pretty close—but no. He’s looking at Will.

Hesitantly, Will makes eye-contact with him. Gareth doesn’t seem bothered about getting caught staring. Will’s brows furrow—this is… weird. They just met not even five minutes ago.

What? He mouths.

Gareth holds up a finger, like he’s gonna tell Will in a second. Will’s confused by this (because when are they gonna have a second?) until Eddie announces today’s session is all about working on PC’s, and in order to keep the campaign interesting and fun, he’d like them all to leave the room and come back in one by one so he can get a brief idea of each character, by the end of today, and hopefully by next session, have everything ready to go.

And then he says—

“Gareth, you first. And then Mike. And after that I don’t care who goes when—figure it out.” Gareth gives Will one last glance. He raises an eyebrow. Then, he absentmindedly looks over at Eddie, and finds he’s staring daggers into the side of Gareth’s skull.

What is happening?

Still perplexed, he leaves the auditorium with his friends, unable to shake the feeling that he’s being discussed in the room they left behind. He picks at his clothes—his nice, plaid button-down and his khakis. He feels kind of stupid—everyone else has a Hellfire t-shirt of some sort—all his friends in a baseball tee, and some of the older members in what are probably older t-shirts. All Eddie’s school-allocated budget must go towards them—Will’s certain they probably don’t get more than fifty bucks, if that.

“So?”

Will starts as Mike throws an arm around his shoulders, completely oblivious to how that affects him.

“Isn’t it fucking awesome?”

Will snorts at the profanity—Mike’s been cussing more and more since he started tailing Eddie like a lost puppy. Will assumes he thinks it makes him sound cool—not that he has anything against cussing, it’s just a little funny to him that Mike never talked like that before.

“Totally,” Will says, letting a little sarcasm seep into his tone, “You just couldn’t resist breaking your promise, could you?” Mike’s eyes widen—deer caught in headlights.

“I–it’s—you never said anything about extracurriculars!” Mike tries, and Lucas and Dustin burst out laughing at the lame attempt at an excuse. Will rolls his eyes, shrugging off Mike’s arm.

“Asshole,” he mumbles. Lucas and Dustin roar with more laughter as Mike looks for other excuses—Eddie this, Dustin that—

“Dustin didn’t promise me anything,” Will points out, and Mike groans.

“Dog house!” Erica is teasing, “Mike’s in troooooubleeeee.”

Truth be told, Mike’s not in trouble. There was certainly an initial sting—the only thing Will had asked of him had not been honored—but beyond that, Will’s not fond of holding grudges, especially given he knows full well how quickly life can go from bad to worse.

It’s just fun to watch Mike squirm.

“I’m sorryyyyyy,” Mike whines, “But Eddie’s just so cool and I couldn’t say no!” He puts both hands on Will’s shoulders, shaking him lightly. Will bites his lip to stifle his grin—the way Mike is pouting at him for forgiveness is equal parts adorable and hilarious.

“Forgive me?”

Will shakes his head, still biting back that grin.

“Figure out how to make it up to me—then we’ll talk.”

Mike straightens up, puts two fingers against his forehead, and dramatically salutes. Will loses the ability to stifle his grin and fully laughs at this ridiculousness.

They’re alive, they’re friends again, and Will’s desperate crush is dwindling by the day seeing how happy his sister is. Will couldn’t stay mad at his best friend for anything, and he won’t go on liking him, either.

Things are okay. Things are on their way to good, again.

“Wheeler—get your bony ass in there.”

And that’s Gareth.

“You—” he points directly at Will, exactly like Will figured he might, “Can I steal you for a second?”

Will stands. He doesn’t miss the confused look that Mike gives him, but he does choose to ignore it, mostly because he’s equally as confused. Gareth motions for Will to follow him outside, and sensing no danger or malintent, he decides there’s no point in saying no, especially since he’s not certain how long he’s gonna be sitting bored on this bench otherwise.

“Okay,” Gareth says, once the doors are shut firmly behind them. The night air is cool and nice on Will’s skin. He wants to take a deep breath—relish in all this comfort of being home, of being able to breathe—but he doesn’t know if Gareth would clock that weird reaction to just stepping out. So he tells himself he’ll take that moment later. “I had a crazy idea, and I wanted to know if you’d be down.”

Will raises an eyebrow.

“I’m listening.”

“So, totally shoot me down if you have a better idea, but I think it would be sick to play as angels—you know, since it’s a hell campaign—but specifically an Angel still in line with Heaven’s order, and a fallen one. So, they like, know each other super well, but also are at odds with each other, and like, one’s trying to convince the other to fall and vice versa.”

Gareth looks at him expectantly. Will stares back, trying to comprehend how Gareth even…

Gareth must have read his mind.

There’s no other explanation for how spot on that idea is compared to all the concepts he’d had running around in his own head mere moments ago. And not only that, but Gareth is looking at him like… how did Will not notice he looked like that, before? Why is it only now that—

“Hello? Earth to Byers?” Will starts. Right—he has to answer.

“Yeah—I mean, that sounds awesome,” he manages, cheeks growing pink in embarrassment. He looks away from Gareth’s cool gaze, unsure how to handle the feelings he’s feeling at this moment. Excitement, anxiety—and a myriad of other things he doesn’t feel right naming yet.

“Awesome,” Gareth repeats, slugging him lightly in the shoulder. Will’s whole stomach jumps into his throat.

This cannot be happening.

“So, if you’re down, I’m free tomorrow night. We could kick it at my place and talk background and logistics and shit.”

That’s a terrible idea.

“Sounds great,” Will says, and in his mind he’s repeatedly kicking the shit out of his own kneecaps. He wishes he were a stronger man, but the idea of playing a character that’s not only complex in his own way, but has a strained relationship to another PC? It’s too good to pass up. Plus, Gareth already talked to Eddie, so Will get’s to play under a DM who’s capable of managing that kind of storyline—it fills his chest with something downright palpable.

“Fuck, I’m excited,” Gareth says.

“Me, too.”

Will wonders briefly if his internal criticism of Mike’s cussing was spoken way too soon.

-

Gareth’s bedroom is a dream—Will would call it a loft, but that’s not exactly what it is. It’s adjacent to the attic, an alcove that sticks out from the roof and makes the house look both magical and completely ridiculous. All sides of it are fitted with windows, and in between those, the walls are a deep, navy blue. For the most part, it’s immaculately clean apart from misplaced shoes and a sock or two.

The slivers of walls which are not windows are covered with intense shelving that holds both an extensive collection of cassettes and vinyls, and books. Will wouldn’t have guessed Gareth was a reader, but by the looks of it, he’s practically a library.

The carpet is soft, the bed is big and covered with an enormous quilt. There are soft white Christmas lights hanging throughout the space, creating an inviting glow. Gareth tells Will to drop his bag anywhere, so Will finds the most out-of-the-way corner he possibly can, and sets his stuff down gently. He’s absolutely enamored with the space, but he’s trying not to show it. He could only imagine the teasing that would ensue if he told Gareth the bedroom he spends every night in is like Will’s own personal heaven.

To Will’s further dismay, Gareth plops down on his bed and pats the space next to him. Never in his life did Will expect to be sitting in bed with a cute boy who’s also basically a stranger, but here he is, swallowing his own nervousness and settling down. It’s unbelievably soft. Will let’s his mind wander to what it must be like to sleep there, and then quickly snaps himself out of it.

That’s creepy, he scolds himself. Stop.

“So, did you think of anything in the last 24-hours, or do you wanna start with just the general idea I had?” Gareth asks—and it’s so impossibly normal for how abnormal Will feels. He’s so stiff he might as well be made of wood. Jesus—even his fight or flight is starting to act up.

“Well,” Will says, deciding he’ll force himself to relax by talking, “You know how angels are, like, usually a patron of something? Like, they have a specific purpose, or whatever? I thought we could use something like that to determine our proficiencies, and stuff. I was also thinking that I could be the straight-edge angel and you could be the fallen one? But that’s totally up to you—your idea, your rules.”

Will fidgets nervously with his own hands. Gareth is… actually listening to him. His expression is attentive. Will’s not used to that—so he keeps rambling.

“Also—I like the idea of a sibling dynamic but I thought it would be better if it was strictly a best friends thing? I feel like a lot of D&D overdoes the, like, “you were my brother” thing but meaningful friendships or whatever can be so much more impactful because you choose your friends and stuff, and for a character to choose their person and then lose that person and find them again but still be at odds is just—Sorry, I should shut up. I just realized I’ve been talking for way too long.”

Will wants to melt into the bedspread—hell, he just might.

Gareth grins at him, shaking his head.

“No, totally keep going. You’re brilliant.”

Yup. Melted. Absolutely a liquid. Will doesn’t think he’ll ever be a solid again.

-

Will starts spending an ungodly amount of time with Gareth, but it’s not his fault. His own friends are great, and he spares them every moment he can, but it’s been a long time since being with them has ever felt like this—totally and completely void of tension. His friends… they haven’t been giving him attention freely. It feels weighed down by this notion that they’re forced to hang around because everything they’ve been through.

It’s not fair to think of them that way—he knows they’d still care for him, regardless.

But that pity is stuck behind their eyes. And they won’t talk about things in front of him, like how they’re feeling, how they’re doing. Once, he was hanging around Lucas and Dustin, and they left the room after uttering some lame excuse. Curious and a little hurt, Will had pressed his ear to the door to find Lucas venting about Max, and how she was doing, and how he’s trying to hang out and have fun but she’s all he can think about—half-paralyzed and totally blind, all alone at home when he’s not with her.

It’s selfish, he knows, but he couldn’t help feeling offended. He can be a shoulder—he knows he can be a shoulder. He’s not going to break down the minute someone else needs a hand. They’ve been plenty good for him—he can do the same.

He just needs a chance.

But they won’t give him it, so he loses himself in the simplicity of a brand-new friendship. He and Gareth start just talking over the campaign, and the D&D stuff, but it soon evolves into much more than that. It starts with a book—

“Gertrude Stein,” Will muses, slipping the collection of poetry right off the shelf. He lets it fall open in his palm to a random page. Gareth had gotten bored of devising background and trying to locate biblical information without a bible—so he’d flopped over on the bed and hidden his face in his pillows.

Will had rolled his eyes at him, and went looking for something to entertain himself.

This is where he finds himself, now.

They read a little Gertrude Stein in English, and Will remembers it fondly. He’s not a huge poetry guy, but Stein’s poetry is so ridiculous it actually manages to interest him. It was also generally impossible for most of the class to read aloud, because of it’s insanity, but Will excelled at it. He read it so well, and so succinctly in class, the teacher herself had been shocked.

Maybe his trauma had rewired his brain for nonsensical poetry.

Book was there, it was there. Book was there. Stop it, stop it, it was a cleaner, a wet cleaner and it was not where it was wet, it was not high, it was directly placed back, not back again, back it was returned, it was needless, it put a bank, a bank when, a bank care.

Gareth looks up at him from the pillows curiously, and Will grins in his direction. He begins reading with the utmost conviction, as if anything he’s reading makes a lick of actual sense.

Suppose a man a realistic expression of resolute reliability suggests pleasing itself white all white and no head does that mean soap. It does not so. It means kind wavers and little chance to beside beside rest. A plain.

Suppose ear rings that is one way to breed, breed that. Oh chance to say, oh nice old pole. Next best and nearest a pillar. Chest not valuable, be papered.

Cover up cover up the two with a little piece of string and hope rose and green, green.

Please a plate, put a match to the seam and really then really then, really then it is a remark that joins many many lead games. It is a sister and sister and a flower and a flower and a dog and a colored sky a sky colored grey and nearly that nearly that let.

Will finishes the poem—called Book—and looks back up at Gareth, who seems to be stifling a laugh. Will raises an eyebrow.

“What?” he teases, “Didn’t get that? I’ll read another one.”

Suppose it is within a gate which open is open at the hour of closing summer that is to say it is so.

All the seats are needing blackening. A white dress is in sign. A soldier a real soldier has a worn lace a worn lace of different sizes that is to say if he can read, if he can read he is a size to show shutting up twenty-four.

Go red go red—

Suppose and Eyes is cut off abruptly by a pillow smacking into Will’s chest and falling over the book he’s holding out—an accident which has Gareth absolutely howling with laughter. Will retaliates immediately, tossing the book to the floor and going after Gareth with a pillow.

The rest is history.

They hang out after school, they go to record stores and diners and swimming in the pond behind his house. They have an absolute blast role-playing ex-best friends while becoming best friends, all the while, Will’s fondness growing exponentially every time they share breath. They spend nights at each other’s houses, they talk for hours, they read together, they listen to music together—Will even get’s a little bit into metal, even though it’s not totally his vibe. Weeks and weeks pass—then months. They know everything about each other like the backs of each other’s hands. Will’s friends start making comments about it—Mike especially—and light-heartedly complain that Will is “replacing” them when that is certainly not the case.

They could never be replaced.

But being around Gareth is like magic, up until the moment it’s not.

“Hey… can I talk to you about something?”

Famous last words, but Will is so full of pizza and so content with his back pressed into Gareth’s bed, head resting lightly against the outside of the boy’s knee, that he doesn’t quite grasp the connotation.

He wishes he had—that there had been warning.

“Sure.”

“So… after the earthquake—”

Will should’ve known then and there this was headed in a foul direction, but he was none-the-wiser. He was still half-engrossed in Emily Dickinson, who had grown to be his absolute favorite poet over the last few months.

“Eddie told me everything that happened. And he told me what happened to you.”

This is where it hits him. Will jerks away from Gareth’s knee like it’s scalding, hurt painting over his face as it all crashes over him.

None of this has been any different.

“Will?”

“Are you serious?” Will asks, horror growing in his chest, in his tone. Gareth’s face screws up, a look Will knows all too well—a look he only sports when he’s thoroughly confused.

He must be stupid—Will’s reaction shouldn’t be confusing to him at all.

“I just wanted—”

Everything is tainted. The way Gareth looks at him, acts with him, the way he chose Will out of everyone from that stupid table that first day of Hellfire—he knew. The whole time.

Will is some pathetic charity case who needed a real friend. And he let Will think, this entire time, that he actually liked Will for himself. Not because Will desperately needed to be liked, not because they were bonded by some shared hell, not because Will had suffered, but because Gareth liked him.

It had all been a lie.

“How could you?” Will asks, shakily. He feels tears gathering in his eyes, and he hates himself for it. Now he’s gonna cry like the broken, traumatized baby he really is. The one Gareth has always seen in him. He’s just proving a fucking point.

That’s all he ever does.

“How could I—”

“I can’t believe I let myself be another fucking charity case,” Will hisses, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand as he scrambles to his feet. Gareth seizes his wrist.

“Will—”

Will’s stronger than Gareth—he doesn’t look it, but there’s a lot of muscle beneath his clothes. He makes sure of it—he doesn’t wanna be the victim of anyone or anything ever again. He wrenches his wrist out of the boy’s grasp, pointing at him accusingly with the other.

“You. Suck,” Will snaps, doing his best not to yell. He doesn’t wanna get worked up enough that Gareth sees just how deeply this has stricken him, and part of him, a naive part of him, hates how devastated Gareth already looks. “I can’t believe I thought you actually liked me. I’m so fucking stupid.”

And with that, he snatches his bag up off the floor, and gets the hell out of there.

It’s only when he’s home, past his mom and his brother, and in his bedroom with the door shut tight, that he crawls into his closet and muffles his sobs with his teeth bared into a sweatshirt.

Heartbroken.

-

“Hello?”

“Don’t hang up!” Will should absolutely hang up. It’s been three days of nothing—avoiding Gareth at school, refusing to speak to him, neglecting to answer the phone even when he was nearest to it.

And now, just when it so happened that nobody else was home, Gareth was on the other end of the line.

“I should so hang up,” Will snaps, already angry. He didn’t wanna be reminded. He’s been so fucked up the last few days, it’s almost like Gareth dumped him. In a way, he kind of did. Or, Will did.

Whatever, the details aren’t important. What’s important is that Gareth lied to him. Extensively.

“Listen—I need to talk to you, but I wanna do it in person, okay? Please—just ten minutes of your time, and if it’s not fixed, I’ll never talk to you again. Except at Hellfire. But that’s it! Okay?” Will wishes he had the balls to say fuck no, but it’s too difficult. He allotted months of his life to Gareth, and as much as he hates it, can attribute a ton of his recent healing to him. Being carefree and spending time with Gareth had been exactly what he needed most days to get out of his own head, to stop thinking about things that couldn’t be helped.

A breath of fresh night air, one might say.

Looking back at that now makes Will nauseous, but he swallows it down. He doesn’t exactly want his and Gareth’s time being good friends to forever be tainted by the fact that it had all been out of pity, but Will doesn’t know what he could possibly say to make that better. He sighs into the phone.

“Get here ASAP. And ten minutes is all you get!”

“Sir yes sir!”

-

“Thank you for letting me talk,” Gareth says. Will crosses his arms over his chest. He’s got no intentions of letting Gareth step foot over the threshold, and Gareth seems to be able to tell.

“Ten minutes,” he says firmly, and Gareth nods quickly.

“The first thing I should’ve done when we started hanging out is tell you I knew about the Upside Down,” he says quickly, and yeah, he’s got that fucking right. “I’m really sorry that I hid that from you—I guess I didn’t think you’d wanna talk about it, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have talked about it. I’m sorry.”

“Decent start,” Will says begrudgingly.

“Second, I did not choose you as my D&D partner because I felt bad for you,” Gareth says, and then his face get’s all screwy, and he starts shifting his weight back and forth, like whatever he needs to say is really hard for him to say. He looks left, and then down at his shoes, and then crosses his arms over his chest and let’s out a breath he’d been holding—

“Spit it out.”

“I thought you were cute!” he says, all his words running together, so much so that it takes Will a second to process what he’s even just said, “And I wanted to hang out with you and I thought that if our D&D characters shared a backstory then we’d spend a lot of time together and I’d be able to make a move but I felt bad about making a move knowing stuff about you you hadn’t shared with me so that night I wanted to kiss you so bad but I wanted to talk about what I knew first so that I wasn’t kissing you and then bringing up your childhood trauma because that wouldn’t be smooth at all, but then I messed everything up and—”

Will’s not sure what happens to his body. First of all, he’s absolutely floored at the notion that he wasn’t a charity case or anywhere near that at all—this boy was attracted to him and wanted to be around him. That’s so far out in left-field it’s practically a home run. Second—Gareth likes him? Like that? In small-town, middle-of-nowhere Hawkins, Indiana, a cute boy likes him? And it’s not Mike Wheeler, feelings-denier extraordinaire, or someone Will would rather eat glass than hang around with?

God, it’s Gareth?

He completely loses track of his ability to command his own body—he steps forward, puts both hands around Gareth’s face, and kisses him right on the mouth to shut him the hell up. Will’s never kissed anyone in his life, save for one girl in California, just to prove his own disinterest, but he makes it work. Gareth certainly doesn’t seem to be complaining, the way his arms move securely around Will’s waist and he kisses back with fervor.

They break, both void of breath. The kiss wasn’t exactly long, but all the excitement has Will’s ribs heaving. He presses his forehead into Gareth’s, blushing like crazy and avoiding the eye-contact Gareth’s trying to prompt from him.

“You’re such an idiot,” Will manages between breaths.

“Kiss me again.”

“Definitely.”

-

It was only a few weeks later that things started getting bad again, but they were heavenly weeks of sneaking around, sharing looks when no one was paying attention, and kissing in dark corners. Will started feeling whole again, like the places and things that the Upside Down had stolen from him were things that Gareth could replace, curling up on couches with him, meeting his mom, holding his hand, and treating him like someone who was already whole.

And though he wished, ached to ignore the warning signs, he told Gareth immediately when The Mind Flayer felt like it was slithering closer, lifting the hairs on the back of his neck and tugging at the corners of his mind.

And Gareth had been there, as fresh as summer night air in his lungs, all the way until the end.

[enbylestat]

Vampride 2024

A violinist becomes hostage of a Lelio and Flaminia.

"Hope" is a thing with feathers.

Where did you get those eyes, mon cher?

Always on the margins.

To define is to limit.

Allons-y Chér(ie).

Full collection here.

[stuffypuddle]

my sweet girls

[waxing-hiraethh]

chapter one - garnet

WIP - Hope Is A Thing With Feathers

After the death of his brother, Sirius tasks himself with going through his old books of poetry, lives in a library-hotel for two months, and uncovers a little bit about life, while he’s at it.

[astrabear]

My labor, and my leisure too (pt. 1)

I've been poking around some ideas lately, about the difference between what feels like a happy (or at least satisfying) ending to a character and what feels like a happy (or at least satisfying) ending to the audience.

This is unedited, un-beta'd, and incomplete. I've already started working on the next bit; I just didn't want to wait to yeet it out into the universe.

********

If Nile hadn’t been frustrated nearly to tears by the time the rest of the team came in, she might have noticed that Nicky and Joe seemed oddly subdued and distracted. But she was, so she didn’t – all she could see was the endless array of charts and computer displays swimming before her eyes.

“I have run so many simulations I feel like I’m stuck in a time loop,” she said as they all gathered around the output table. “I’ve recalculated all the parameters to the limits of possibility, sometimes beyond. And I can’t find any way we pull this off.”

“But the intel we just got – “ Gert was new, had been with them for less than twenty years, and hadn’t quite let go of the idea of being a superhero.

“That intel is what makes it so hard.” Gert frowned, and Nile quickly added, “Don’t get me wrong, it’s fantastic you were able to track it down. If you hadn’t, we’d be totally screwed.”

“So what’s the problem?” Lijie asked. She ran her finger along one of the infiltration routes in the display. “This looks straightforward to me.”

“The problem,” Nile said, “is the timing. Whoever lays those charges, they’re not getting out. Any delay long enough for exfil is long enough for them to be detected and disarmed by the security system.”

“But we’re shutting down the security system. I walked you through that just the other day. I’m telling you, it’s foolproof.” Jerrah, over 1600 years old, hated that Nile still referred to him as one of “the kids,” but his temper and defensiveness had not mellowed with age and at times like this she felt entirely justified.

She heroically resisted banging her head against the table. It would only scramble the schematics. “Your plan for shutting the system down is foolproof. It’s great. It will absolutely work. But what we didn’t know until recently is that it’s on an automatic reset timer that will boot it back up after a set amount of time. You’re welcome to review the programming,” she ran her gaze around the team, addressing them all, “in fact I’d love it if you’d all review the scenarios I’ve run. Just to be sure. But I’m telling you – the numbers just don’t work. The support team will be fine, but the one with the charges is not getting out alive.”

Gert laughed. “I thought that was the point of us. We don’t have to get out alive.” They looked around and noticed no one else shared their amusement. “What am I missing?”

Jerrah answered while scrolling through Nile’s calculations. “An explosion this size isn’t just going to take out the complex, it’s going to wipe out the whole atmo dome. Anything not secured will get blasted out of the gravity well. You remember about Quỳnh? This would be infinitely worse. Literally.”

“But what about – “

Step by step, Nile walked them through it. How any equipment robust enough to survive the explosion would make it impossible to complete the mission to cause the explosion in the first place. How fast the debris and bodies would be moving with no inertia to slow them down. The number of bodies there would be, and the limits of their ship’s sensors. All of it. The inescapable physics, and the impossibility of making that choice.

“We have to scrap the plan,” she said, “start over from scratch. We’ll find another way, somehow, to – “ Joe and Nicky had withdrawn a bit from the group and were having their own private conversation. This, too, should have been a sign: they didn’t do cross-talk during mission briefings, and through all the months of planning they’d taken this mission particularly seriously.

But Nile was too frazzled and distracted for this to register, so she just barked out, “Hey guys! Are we boring you? Or do you have something you’d like to share?”

Her friends, mentors, brothers, exchanged a final loaded glance and then refocused on the group. Nicky put his arm around Joe’s shoulders, and as he did so his sleeve rode up, just a little, showing an odd patch of dirt on the inside of his upper arm. She found herself staring at it without knowing why.

“Joe and I will lay the charges,” Nicky said.

“Don’t be stupid,” Lijie snapped. “Nile’s right. Do you really think we’re going to just let you guys float around in vacuum forever?”

Three things happened simultaneously in an instant that felt to Nile like a lifetime:

…Nile noticed that the knuckles on Joe’s right hand were also weirdly dirty.

…and Joe said, “Of course not. We’re not asking you to.”

…and Nile thought Bruises. Not dirt. Bruises.

Then time slammed back into place and she cried out from the force of it.

And the room erupted into chaos.

[a-treatise-on-velociraptors]

Why are we looking to fanfiction for terrible monikers for eyes when Emily Dickinson already did the worst one over a century ago

[sasukimimochi]

Prompt for day 20 - Feathers (see other prompts here)

.✦The Thing With Feathers.

Subnautica Below Zero / MDZS crossover ✦. Word Count - 1001

Wei Wuxian climbed into his sea truck and sighed, immediately falling into his sleeper cabin with music quiet and low. He’d been chased across the purple vents biome by a Chelicerate just so he could gather up a few more lithium for his equipment and base, only to have to get out of his sea truck to squeeze under that gigantic vent garden where another one was hanging above because Lan-Zhan sent him another set of coordinates to check out.

The artifact he’d found hadn't even been anything too useful- and he didn’t have a reinforced suit so when he got too close, he got a free lobster broil- except he was the lobster. At least they were one step closer to getting Lan-Zhan his own body, but why did all of these artifacts have to be smack dab in every annoying or dangerous location on this oceanic planet?! He didn't like the sea enough for this.

Well…he didn’t hate it. In fact he rather enjoyed its beautiful side. But it didn’t like him back, and he just was running low on reserves with little progress made in the investigation on Yanli and Jiang Cheng’s whereabouts. 

He just wanted a break, then a clue. It'd been too long since the last one he’d found. He wanted anything- anything at all that would give him a clue to say his siblings were okay. That it was a ruse led on by that damn corporation, that they were both okay and just hiding somewhere and not-

Ring— Ring–

He sighed softly. “Lan-Zhan…”

Another call... It could be important- if it was another artifact he should at least get the signal before he got some rest. Well, if what this was could be considered rest. Bundled up in a wet suit was not the ideal way; he missed wearing more casual clothing.

 He answered the call, trying his best to mask how tired he was. “What’s up, Lan-Zhan? Got another coordinate?” He rolled over and sat up in his cot so he could properly listen, pushing his damp hair to the side over his shoulder. He still couldn’t quite get used to hearing the alien’s voice inside his head, but it was a somewhat welcome distraction right now.

“Our searches have been… useful, but… I have no evidence as to the fate of my people. The network I hoped to rejoin may no longer exist. I cannot feel it.”

Wei Wuxian sobered up somewhat as he listened to him speak. Lan-Zhan had many moments like this- he wasn’t even sure if the other knew this was from a place of insecurity, as he seemed to have lost touch with a lot of human behaviors after living the way he had for so long. 

“There could be a million reasons for that. Like…what if the network had a system update? They’re on version 2001.4 and you’re still on version 14.2.”

“That would make me incompatible. How would I even begin to plan my upgrades?”

Wei Wuxian chuckled quietly, leaning over to rest on the side of his sea truck. “Okay, that’s not what I meant. Bad example. You still know how to get home?”

“Mn.”

“So don’t give up. Go there. See for yourself what happened!”

“You are expressing optimism but it is not supported by probability.”

Wei Wuxian sighed and smiled soon after, “Hope isn’t based on statistics. It’s born from a drive for something better. There’s a poem Yanli loved– Hope is human. Hope is…uhh…oh right– ‘Hope is the thing with feathers!’”

“This does not match any fauna I can find in your PDA.”

Wei Wuxian laughed, “It’s a line from a 19th century Earth author. Emily something.

‘Hope’ is the thing with feathers - That perches in the soul - And sings the tune without the words - And never stops - at all -

I promise we’ll get answers one way or another, Lan-Zhan.”

There was a stretch of silence for a moment, before he heard his companion add one last thing:

“Adding ‘Hope’ to your database.”

Wei Wuxian’s eyebrows rose as a small notification did indeed pop up on his PDA after the call ended.

Hope is an animal of unknown origin. According to Wei Ying and a poet named Emily Dickinson, it is described as having feathers. My database found the poem Wei Ying was referring to:

"Hope" is the thing with feathers - That perches in the soul - And sings the tune without the words - And never stops - at all - And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard - And sore must be the storm - That could abash the little Bird That kept so many warm - I've heard it in the chillest land - And on the strangest Sea - Yet - never -in Extremity, It asked a crumb - of me.

The presence of Hope seems to inspire humans to persevere in the face of adversity. Perhaps humans keep a Hope with them at all times.

From this notation, Hope appears to be a hardy avian creature. It is capable of surviving at sea and in cold climates. Having "kept so many warm," Hope might be observed to produce exothermic chemical reactions.

Assessment: find and maintain Hope.

Wei Wuxian’s expression softened and he gently thumbed the edge of his PDA. Classic Lan-Zhan… he laughed quietly as he laid down in his cot, staring at those last words. Find and maintain hope, huh? His heart was in the right place.

He would miss him…

His smile faded somewhat as he thought of their eventual separation. Of course he wanted his own body back, but…what would he do after it all? Where would he go? It's not like he had a ship to leave on, and who knows if he could go back to normal life after this.

He sighed quietly and put away his PDA. He would cross that bridge when he got to it. They were together now, for who knows how long.

He had plenty of time to think about it after he got some rest.

See my other MDZS projects here, or check out the links at the beginning for the other prompts.

[toughereel]

Random thoughts..

Godzilla minus one is such a good film that i believe it should be put on the irish leaving cert course as it's message about Kamikaze pilots and the effects of war on regular civilians would be such a interesting thing to write about than other things.

[itspbandjellytime]

The Assistant [Hailee Steinfeld x Fem!Reader] - Chapter 1

Plot: Y/N Waldorf is fresh out of college and her first job is being Hailee Steinfeld's personal assistant, but what Y/N doesn't know is that Hailee is hiding a huge secret from the general public and from her, as her assistant.

Notes: This is a multi-chapter fic, you can also read this on wattpad under the same username "itspbandjellytime". This fanfic is also going to contain NSFW themes in the near future, so if you're under the age of 18 please don't read this. Thank you!

Word count: 1.5k words

[Y/N's POV]

My name is Y/N Waldorf, I am 21 years old and I live in Seattle, Washington, and I just graduated from college a few months ago. After four gruesome years of this course that I didn't like, I am finally free and I get to choose what job I'll have in the future since this is America and it's a free country after all. I got to say College was mentally challenging, but it was worth it after all and I got my degree, which I will probably never use in the future.

My parents, are real estate brokers and they were high school sweethearts. But they're not your typical high school sweethearts where one is a football player and the other is the girl next door, my parents were a bunch of nerds who fell in love and gave birth to two girls. I am the youngest and my sister Kelly, is the eldest. 

If I can talk about their reaction to me graduating college, all I can say is that they were happy that I finished college after ranting to them I want to drop out every five seconds. However they have been bugging me for months to get a job which is annoying at first but I manage to get used to them bothering me at 3 in the morning to get one which I have- well had. I told my parents I've been working at the coffee shop somewhere in our local town, but they told me to get a PROPER job, a job that can pay me well and can give me money to support myself. As if the job at the coffee shop didn't support me when I was in college which it did for some time, I quit my job at the coffee shop a few weeks ago and now I am scouring the internet for a job.

My eyes start to hurt from staring at the screen of my laptop way too long, scrolling through countless job hunting websites, my ears start to hurt as well from the headphones I am wearing and blasting out my playlists as I look for the said job. I start to slowly give up at this point and start to overthink about my life choices until I was on the verge of tears, when all of a sudden I saw something that says: "Urgent! In need of a Personal Assistant, please contact Laura McKinnon." along with her details. I was skeptical at first when I saw the advertisement, I am fully aware about the scams happening which leads to people being in very life threatening circumstances. But with a quick google search, I realized that she works as a talent manager and she's based in California, I feel like this is also a sign from God at the same time. I immediately typed down her e-mail address and sent my resume to Laura, hoping for the best and I don't get scammed.

A few days have passed, I've been checking my e-mail almost everyday to see if I get a word from Laura which I did. According to the E-mail I sent, I am scheduled to have an interview with her via. Zoom the next day. The next day arrived and I was interviewed by Laura through Zoom, once the interview concluded she told me she'll contact me again once I get the job or not. I waited and waited, day and night for a response from Laura. I was desperate to get this job that I started to go to church almost everyday, I was religious for an entire week basically.

One day, while I was in a middle of a run just to count my steps in and getting my blood pumping, my phone starts to ring. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and answered the call from an anonymous number "Hello?" I spoke, panting and catching my breath "Hello is this Y/N Waldorf?" The person asked, the sound of the person's voice sounded sweet, feminine, and had a valley girl accent. 

I furrow my brows, checking my surroundings before speaking "Yes, who is this?" I asked.

"This is Laura McKinnon, from the office of Hailee Steinfeld. I am just here to inform you that you got the job as Hailee Steinfeld's personal assistant." Laura said, hold on... Did she say Hailee Steinfeld? Like... THE Hailee Steinfeld?!? I get to work as Hailee Steinfeld's personal assistant?!? I tend not to freak out in the middle of the street knowing I am gonna be a part of Hailee's team. I've looked up to Hailee since I first saw The Edge of Seventeen for the first time and I never looked back since, she is also the reason why I am into women and met one of my closest friends, Jackie.

"Miss Waldorf? Are you still on the line?" Laura asks me, I snapped back to reality and stammered for a bit to find words "Uhm... Yes. Sorry, I was distracted." I responded, chuckling nervously.

"It's all good Miss Waldorf, anyways you will be starting next week. I know you are based in Washington, but if you have any associates around the Los Angeles area, you can stay with them." Laura told me, all did was respond with a nod and a smile on my face "Yes... I will do that, thank you so much." I said as Laura ended the call.

After my run, I headed straight to my apartment and called up my bestfriend Jackie, I know it's crazy that I am calling my internet friend before my parents who have been bugging me to get a proper job. I met Jackie through our shared interest and love for Hailee Steinfeld, thanks to the website "Twitter", I was blabbering about Hailee on the site as usual and then she asked if we can be mutuals on that site  and we have been inseparable ever since also Jackie lives in Los Angeles around West Hollywood so I can crash at her place. 

"Jackie!" I said with a proud tone, running around my apartment like I am a dog who just got the zoomies. 

"Y/N/N! Hey, what's up?" Jackie asks me, I settle down on the couch and clear my throat. 

"Girl guess what?" I ask her, I cant contain my excitement as a huge grin forms on my face.

"What?" She asks me back.

"I got a job!" I exclaimed, not telling her what my job is and who I work for just yet to build the suspense.

"No way, congrats girlie! What job?" Jackie asks.

I clear my throat again, a smirk forms on my face "Personal assistant." I confidently say.

"For?"

"Hailee Steinfeld." I responded, giggling like a teenage girl. I heard Jackie scream on the other line, causing me to laugh at her response "Yes, I am being serious Jackie. And I need to crash at your place." I told her.

"Oh my God sure, you are free to stay at my place... holy shit... You bagged a good job." Jackie compliments me and all I can do is laugh.

"It's insane, I know." I said, smiling "I start next week, and I gotta tell my parents about it as well." I added.

"Well you better tell them, girl." Jackie encouraged me, I can tell that she's leaning against a wall and smiling with her phone on her hand.

"Of course, I'll tell them and I will drive by there tomorrow." I said, ending my call with Jackie.

I told my parents about the job that I got, their reactions were positive and they supportive of me moving from Washington to California the next day. But my grandparents are huge conspiracy theorist believers, they start to talk about random things about the entertainment industry and my parents just shook their heads and told me to ignore them and enjoy my job. And in the words of my mother, she told me that this job is a once in a life time opportunity and I should savor every moment. Which I will, cause I have a feeling that working with your idol will be one of the best experiences I will have in my life time.

I spent the entire day packing my things for California, and It's a good thing that my sister, Kelly is down to look after and live in my apartment for the mean time. I love my sister, I would die for her. 

The next day, I finally left Washington and headed to California. I decided to take my car and drive, it feels like a road trip with yourself and it's very therapeutic. I suggest that you try it, I spent the entire road trip blasting out Taylor Swift, eating convenient store food, sleeping in my car in empty parking spots. 

The trip lasted for 17 hours, and 17 hours later I arrived in sunny Los Angeles. The last time I was in Los Angeles was when I was 15, when I first met Jackie and we saw Hailee live when she opened Charlie Puth. I took time to look around the surroundings as I drove to where Jackie lives, a smile forms on my face and it made me realize that this will be the start of a new chapter of my life and I hope this one will never end.

[oneofstarkskids]

love letters, roses, and lockets

pairings: emily dickinson x sue gilbert

genre: fluff, angst?

warnings: !lower case text! also it's kind of an AU where sue isn't with austin. !unrevised!

summary: a dickinson valentine's day

*not my gif*

after brushing through her chestnut brown hair and letting the curls drape down her shoulders, emily went to the field to meet with sue.

the brunette's heart was racing with the excitement of secrecy. the idea of women loving women wasn't a very common concept in this day in age. in fact it was an abomination in the eyes of society.

emily never had been one to care what others thought.

besides, loving sue was never a choice. it just kind of...happened. emily caught herself missing the sound of sue's bubbling laughter when she was away.

every time their hands would accidentally brush, it felt like electricity crackling against emily's skin. she longed for that feeling. again and again.

when emily would spiral and get lost in her thoughts, sue became her anchor.

loving sue came naturally. it was exhilarating and sometimes painful, but even if emily was given the choice she would choose to love sue. always.

on her way down the stairs emily's younger sister, lavinia, shouted for her, "emily! mother says you need to complete your afternoon chores before the guests arrive!"

emily practically ignores the comment, as there is only one thing occupying her mind, "yeah, okay! i will."

lavinia knew she wouldn't.

sue was waiting under emily's special tree. she was lost in a book with a far off gaze. as emily approached the spot, hair tousled by the wind, she froze. emily wasn't an artist, but if she were, she would paint a thousand pictures of sue.

instead, she tries to go unnoticed as she takes in the sight of sue's peaceful aura. she traps the memory in her mind, hoping that it never slips away.

her lips tug upward at the corners, ever so slightly, before she runs over to sue.

"emily!" sue says, eyes sparkling, as she sets down her novel.

emily pulls her in for an unexpected kiss. sue's body relaxes against emily's and she holds sue closely to her, but it's never close enough.

neither one of them breaks the kiss until they've surely run out of breath.

emily rests her forehead against sue's and closes her eyes. she savors every sensation and feeling of being near the woman she loves.

sue laughs lightly, "what was that for?"

"tomorrow more hearts will be shattered than those that will be filled with truly requited love," emily replies.

although emily didn't entirely answer sue's question, sue had learned over time to understand some of her lover's riddles.

"valentine's day?" sue asked.

emily nodded with a pout. "i want to show you how much you mean to me, sue."

"oh, emily, i know you love me. you tell me endlessly," sue shakes her head, "you don't need to perform some grand gesture."

emily frowned, "but i do. isn't the greatness of one's love determined by the actions of that person. and if so then i must show you just how much i love you."

"words are not enough," emily whispers softly.

"that's funny coming from a poet," sue quips.

emily can't help but match the smile on sue's face with her own. sue's joy was as contagious as any disease and it spread to emily like wildfire.

emily kissed sue one last time before running back home to prepare everything for the next day.

she slipped past her mother, actively avoiding her chores, and went straight to her room.

she'd already planned to get sue the perfect flowers. she didn't want to buy roses, that's what everyone bought. emily didn't want her love for sue to be diminished to something so common.

no, instead she remembered the kalanchoe integra, one of the many flowers she'd collected and studied. although simple in physical appearance, the plant is known for its long lasting blooms. it's generally associated with love, persistence and prosperity which is exactly what emily wanted to show sue.

another gift she planned to give was jewelry. most people got diamond rings or lockets for their lovers, but emily decided to get sue a compass. yes, a compass to wear around her neck and no it was not functioning.

the dials on the compass point north and they never move. emily thought that she could think of it as being a reminder that no matter where sue goes, there's only one place emily will ever be. in her heart.

the last present should've been a simple task. nothing but a love letter, and in typical emily fashion, her love letter was in the form of a poem.

and although writing felt like breathing to emily, this poem didn't seem to want to come easily to her.

most days sue was emily's muse. in fact, she didn't know how many poems exactly she'd written about the woman but it had to be a number amongst the thousands.

emily sat at her desk, quill in hand all night long. she was awake when the animals settled and the wind whistled, and she was awake when the sun rose groggily and the birds woke their mothers.

yet all she had written was a single line.

"shit!" she cursed under her breath as she jolted up from falling half-asleep once again.

she looked down at the paper that read, "You know the song inside my heart..."

emily balled up the paper and tossed it aside before burying her face in her hands feeling defeated.

without a knock, emily's mother burst into her room with a smile, "are you coming down for breakfast, emily?"

emily sighed, "yes mother."

her mother showed no concern for emily's condition. after the woman had left, emily sluggishly got up from the chair and dramatically walked over to the door.

her entire family, including sue, was at the table for breakfast.

emily sat down with a slump and propped her elbows up on the table.

"emily, have some manners," her mother snapped as their irish maid, maggie, dishes out breakfast.

william, emily's father, sits quietly reading the paper.

emily sighs loudly hoping someone takes notice.

nobody does.

she sighs again.

"emily, are you alright?" sue asked.

emily pouted, "no. i think i have...i can't even say it, it's too painful."

"you're ill?" emily's mother questions.

"yes, indeed. ill with an awful contagious disease that kills you slowly." emily complains.

everyone gasps.

"a disease that refuses to allow any intelligent thought to take hold in my mind and hinders me from writing the words that describe my truest feelings."

william pulls his paper down and arches a brow in confusion.

lavinia rolls her eyes at emily's performance, "she has writers block."

"oh," william says uninterested, "served you right. a woman is not meant to be a poet."

oh god...not this again, emily thought to herself. her father tried to crush her dreams almost daily, but she was quite a head strong young woman.

"william," emily's mother says warningly.

emily shakes her head, "no mom, let him speak. go ahead. tell me how i'm an embarrassment to the family name. how i'm unnatural or unusual and that no man will ever love a woman who wants to write."

"emily that's enough," william says sternly.

emily sits there for a minute as tears start to glaze over her eyes due to her father's lack of compassion. she pushes her chair back and rushes out of the kitchen.

the front door is slammed so violently that the table shakes and a glass shatters onto the floor.

emily's mother shakes her head in annoyance, "maggie." she directs towards the shattered glass and maggie goes to get a broom.

"excuse me," sue says politely before chasing after emily through the field.

emily feels her heart in her chest. it beats so ferociously she thinks it will leap away. all she hears is whipping of the wind.

she finally stops, far away from the house, and stares up at the sky. her chest rises and falls heavily as she tries to catch her breath.

she was so caught up with herself that she doesn't notice sue standing beside her. sue's hair was disheveled and her lips were parted in an attempt to get air into her lungs.

"emily," she says softly.

emily turns to sue.

sue reaches her hand up and brushes hair out of emily's face. her eyes are filled with sympathy.

emily squeezes her eyes shut as sue's fingertips dance along her skin.

"maybe he's right. maybe i'm not a poet. maybe i'm just a hopeless woman who has no talent and no worth and never will," emily winces as if her own words stabbed her in the chest.

sue smiles and shakes her head, "no emily. that isn't true. you're a woman and a poet which is twice as better than any man deserves."

sue can tell emily is still unconvinced, "emily, your poetry is more than just words. it's art. it's like a melody that i can't get out of my head. or a far off land in a book that i yearn to travel to. emily, i love your poetry...because it's you."

emily leans in and grants sue a fervid kiss. words are not spoken between the two, but the confessions lie between their flushed lips.

I love you, forevermore

[postnuclearel]

HELLO!

My name is El, I'll take any pronouns. This is basically a list of my interests and stuff I like so that I can pin it in case anyone is interested. I'm neurodivergent and usually my hyper fixations swing between these every couple of months

Marauders Era HP

Dead Poets Society

Good Omens

Peaky Blinders

Formula One

Doctor Who

Crime Dramas (LINE OF DUTY AND VERA ESPECIALLY!!!)

I love reading, especially classics, actions and anything well written with a sad ending.

I love poetry and Emily Dickinson is my fav poet

I collect records!

Pasta is my favourite food ever ever ever (I eat it so much I genuinely think I have a condition)

I write fanfiction sometimes (whenever I have motivation and I'm not too busy)

60s/70s music (The Beatles, Fleetwood Mac, The Velvet Underground) I honestly just have a massively diverse music taste there's no way to pin it down, like it goes from Lana Del Rey to Adam and the Ants to the Smiths to TV Girl and I have a playlist with 768 songs on that I shuffle whenever I want to listen to music. - Boy Genius & especially Phoebe Bridgers - Hozier (I'm seeing him live in June and Lord Huron!) - I'm the biggest Billy Joel fan to ever exist - Taylor Swift (The music and not the person - I don't support some of the things she's done)

Thank you for reading <3

[gay-mormon-wizard]

Im sorry but no heterosexual wrote historical fanfiction about Susan Gilbert and Emily Dickinson (ivy, 2020), songs about secret love (I Know Places, 2014) that she later wished she hadn't been afraid to make public (Dancing With Our Hands Tied, 2017),