#eliot angst is my favorite

[leveragedlibrarians]

Ok I was going to put this in the tags but it was too long so uh

Look. Everyone is going to point to nate and say that obviously he's the normal one but you're WRONG. The series premiere he tells us he used to run game on criminals to get stolen merch back. We all saw what happened between s1 and s2. Not to mention his father, his childhood, and the fact he was going to be a priest. Nate Ford may be an unseasoned piece of plain white bread of a man, but he has never ever been 'normal.'

Sophie lives for the drama. The glamor. The chase. Her 'normal' would probably be retiring to a little island off the coast of Sicily in a mansion full of art she stole and every now and again going off to some charity event as whatever fake identity she feels like pulling out of the closet.

Parker never had a normal to start with, not that she'd ever want one. She was born to commit crimes. Not just raised to (Archie my nemesis) but she /chose/ crimes. The earliest memory we see is of her stealing. She loves it, she lives it. She'll be in a retirement home stealing tapioca pudding for the kicks.

Hardison would never even consider a 'normal' life, okay? He'd be insulted at the prospect. He's /gifted/. Hacking is an art and he is an artist. He is the greatest hacker in the world and takes so so so much pride in that. I don't think Hardison could stop hacking if you paid him.

But Eliot? I think not only is Eliot the only one capable of normalcy, but I think part of him craves it. It's important to note that of all of them, he didn't initially seek out his role of being a hitter. The rest of them chose their roles, but Eliot didn't sign up for his. He joined the army. He didn't do it for the violence either, he did it because he wanted to be like his dad. Then he was just too good at his job, and kept getting pulled down darker and darker roads by his commanding officers.

I fully believe Eliot had a totally different life planned out. He was going to join the army, marry Amy, have 2.5 kids and settle down, maybe inherit his dad's shop. In s4 he tells Nate that he used to be someone completely different "before all of this started." He wasn't born a killer or a hitter. He was a kid who joined the army and "had god in his heart" and, importantly, Eliot still keeps looking for the person he used to be. We never see the rest of them lamenting the 'good ole days,' we never hear hardison talk about before he learned to hack except that he played the violin before /choosing/ to hack instead. Of all of them, I think that if Eliot could go back in time and change it all he absolutely would.

Over and over we see Eliot bonding with every kid and middle class character in the series. He throws himself into his grifting roles- miner, chef, singer- because I think on some level he /wants/ that. He wants to be the chef who owns the lil restaurant down the street, the guy you could grab a beer with. He wants to settle down, maybe get married, and leave the violence behind (except maybe to play hockey or box). I'm not saying he doesn't like his life with them at all- I think that after all he's been through already that Leverage is probably the happiest ending he could get- but I am saying that the middle part, between the army and when we meet him s1, is probably something that makes Eliot genuinely hate himself. He didn't want to be a killer. He doesn't like it. He tries desperately to save Nate from what he couldn't save himself from. If he liked killing, liked any part of the wetwork he used to do, he wouldn't have quit. Wouldn't have tried so desperately to get away from it. He never wanted to be a killer, he was just so Good at it.

Eliot was the normal kid next door who got pulled into a life that he hated by people far far more powerful and dangerous than him, and I think that he regrets that every day.

Sophie: Who would live a normal life outside of this job?

Eliot: Me. It would be me.

Me: *thinking about it*

[greenbergsays]

Ked's right, I do have book recs that you can find under this tag and also some on my writing blog here. I also have a page here where you can see what's on my bookshelf, but you can't filter it because Tumblr doesn't allow Java anymore >__>

I wouldn't call that page a rec list, though, it's just an inventory of what I own or what's on my list to own. Some of those books are objectively terrible and I will freely admit that, but there was something about them compelling enough that I read them more than once.

I didn't mean for the below to turn into me just reccing you authors but it kind of turned into that, so here are authors I would recommend:

Onley James - I love her so much that I support her Patreon. All of her stuff is good (and loosely connected) but my favorites are, of course, the Necessary Evils series. It has two spin-off series which I also very much enjoy: Jericho's Boys & The Watch. All three series surround the psychopaths in love trope, however Jericho's Boys and the first book in the Watch series do not feature it as a main trope because neither of the main characters fit the bill. Most of them do feature some level of kink, though.

Kiki Clark - Her main series is werewolves (but no Omegaverse) and it's called the Kincaid Pack. The first book is my favorite, but I own them all. It's finished and she's starting a new series in that 'verse, the prequel to which I think is The Mobster's Mate, which is so up my alley it's like someone was spying on me. She also has a MC/kink series called Leather & Chrome that's good, but it's not my favorite kink series. (Kiki also have other contemporary books that I love, I just don't want this to get too long)

SPEAKING of kink. Robin (RJ) Moray - She has a series called His Boy Next Door that gay-awakening, age gap, and BDSM-related. It has a spin-off series about two other characters called A Collar For His Brat, both are excellent. The only thing is in HBND, the main character's name is Channon and that took some getting used to. Robin also has other books which I highly recommend--including a space Omegaverse story called Changed: Mated to the Alien Alpha, which is very good--she is probably my Top 3 favorite authors and the fact that more of her stuff isn't available in paperback is a source of constant misery for me.

Eliot Grayson -- The only person I can think of off the top of my head that writes well-written first person POV. The Mismatched Mates series is her main title iirc. It's a soul-bonding / "mate or die" situation at first and segues eventually into "mating for convenience." Some stories are related and some aren't.

Stella Starling -- if you like high fluff and low angst, this is the author for you. All of her stuff is contemporary and very cute. My favorite series is the Semper Fi one but I like & own them all.

Sam Burns (and Sam Burns w/ W.M. Fawkes) - They do anything fantasy/magic-related. Werewolves, urban fantasy, there's a series about the Greek Gods, etc. I haven't read ALL of their works, but the stuff I have read, I like. My favorites / the ones I own: Wolves of Kismet (Omegaverse), the Star-Marked Warrior series (sci-fi/aliens), & Wolf Moon Rising (Omegaverse).

Ella Frank (and Ella Frank w/ Brooke Blaine) - Contemporary writer(s) that specialize in writing multiple books for the same couple. There's a lot of gay/bi-awakening. The Temptation series is a fantastic audiobook journey that I cannot recommend enough, that narrator was amazing. I also really liked the first three Fallen Angel books are about the same couple and I love them, the fourth FA book is about a different couple and I DNFed it. Couldn't say why, it just didn't hold my interest.

...I have more, but I should probably work at some point this morning. So if you want more / want a specific rec for a specific trope or genre, lemme know!

[violetsarepurple-fuckyou]

Fourth Warm Up Submission

@magiciansfanworksextravaganza

This scene has been floating around in my Google Docs, getting rotated to different areas of my larger plans for this fic, since July of 2023. It is honestly one of my favorite things I have written for this fandom, and one of my first attempts at writing smut for Queliot, so please be nice (and, if you don't mind, effusive 😂). I've been trying to figure out the perfect chronology for this fic for a while now, but this scene was the most complete and the one the best fit in the word limit, so thank you to the organizers of this event who finally kicked my but into gear, made me call fuck it, and post 🥰

(Link under the cut)

Something Borrowed (1339 words) by violetsarefuckingpurple Chapters: 1/? Fandom: The Magicians (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Quentin Coldwater/Eliot Waugh, Arielle/Quentin Coldwater/Eliot Waugh, Arielle/Quentin Coldwater, Arielle & Eliot Waugh Characters: Quentin Coldwater, Eliot Waugh, Arielle (The Magicians), Theodore "Ted" Rupert Coldwater-Waugh Additional Tags: Mosaic Timeline (The Magicians: A Life in the Day), Non-Linear Narrative, Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Fluff and Angst, numerous marriage proposals, Eliot Waugh is Bad at Feelings, Bottom Quentin Coldwater, Top Eliot Waugh Series: Part 1 of Queliot Proposals verse Summary: A sprawling, non-linear Mosaic fic. Pretty much what you expect, featuring Quentin "can't stop proposing" Coldwater, Eliot "I'm gonna fuck it up somehow" Waugh, Arielle "I guess I signed up for this" Coldwater, and Teddy being adorable. This fic kinda functions as a prequel to at least two of my fics (one posted, one not) so I'll add directions in the notes as needed lol

[haledamage]

OKAY TROPES. (which have all flown out of my head now, of course)

Enemies to Lovers

Illness/Injury Inspired Confession of Feelings

Knight in Sour Armor

Enemies to Lovers

overall, I think a solid B! this is one of my all-time favorites when it's done right! also one of my favorites to write myself (Qora/Arcann, Marii/Tragen, Warden/Loghain), and I love sub-tropes like Rivals to Lovers and Enemies to Reluctant Allies (to Lovers) too :3 something-something someone seeing the darkest and worst parts of you and wanting you anyway, something-something baring your throat and trusting them not to rip it out, something-something vulnerability and sharing secrets with the person most able to destroy you with them however, when it's done badly, it's the wooooorst. if they don't respect each other as nemeses (reluctantly or otherwise), or there's a really gross power imbalance, it just makes my skin crawl 😬 if they're not equals then what! is the point!

Illness/Injury Inspired Confession of Feelings

A bonus points if the confession is made while delirious/barely conscious and they have some Miscommunication Angst about it for a while before figuring it out. like person A thinks B was too out of it to actually mean it/thought they were talking to someone else/doesn't remember saying it, and B thinks A isn't mentioning it because they don't feel the same and are trying to be nice about it. and then they talk it out and smooch about it or the silly version where B confesses to person C thinking they're A and now C has to plan Shenanigans to get A and B together also bonus points for "I'm dying and just want you to know how I feel before it's too late" and then they don't die and now the feelings are just. out there. and they have to live with that (and then they talk it out and smooch about it)

Knight in Sour Armor

A+++, not possible to put enough plusses I swear all of my favorite characters fall into this trope. Kurt, Casavir, Lann, Rupert Giles, Eliot Spencer, Orym, The Doctor (especially Nine imo), the list goes on and on it's also a trope that I didn't realize until literally just now that I assign to so many of my OCs. Etain, Vesiya, and Cait Cousland being the most so, but also Qora, Marii, Kai... Kira's really starting to lean into this too 🤔

[eliotqueliot]

Seasonal fic rec

Sharing again one of my favorite chapters of one of my favorite fics of all time. a litany of dreams - Chapter 6 - peacefrog - The Magicians (TV) [Archive of Our Own] Includes one of my favorite Eliot lines of all time, too. And one of my favorite Quentin lines. No, I won't spoil them. (Once you read this fic...you'll know what they are.)

Also just amazing writing, through & through. Heartrending in the best way. This entire fic (and trilogy). Lives in my heart forever. Thank you @lizardkingeliot

for so much more than I can ever say a litany of dreams (123516 words) by peacefrog Chapters: 7/7 Fandom: The Magicians (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Quentin Coldwater/Eliot Waugh, Quentin Coldwater & Julia Wicker, Minor or Background Relationship(s) Characters: Quentin Coldwater, Eliot Waugh, Julia Wicker, Margo Hanson, Henry Fogg, Josh Hoberman, William "Penny" Adiyodi, Alice Quinn, Ted Coldwater, Marina Andrieski Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, No Beast AU, Dom/sub, Gentle Dom Eliot Waugh, Sub Quentin Coldwater, Eliot Waugh's Canonically Huge Dick, Quentin Coldwater's Oral Fixation, Subspace, Oral Sex, Deepthroating, Public Displays of Affection, Possessive Behavior, Mental Health Issues, Nonverbal Safewords, Praise Kink, Kink Negotiation, Orgasm Denial, Edging, Love Bites, Spells & Enchantments, Cock Rings, Sex Toys, Rope Bondage, Come Marking, Come Eating, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Hair-pulling, Light Breathplay, Face-Fucking, Recreational Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Spanking, Tailoring, Collars, Subdrop, Depression, Miscommunication, Aftercare, Safeword Use, Angst with a Happy Ending, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Hurt/Comfort, Intercrural Sex, Anal Sex, Meeting the Parents, Found Family, Cock Warming, Hand Jobs, Rough Oral Sex, Switching, Sex Magic Series: Part 2 of time cast a spell on you Summary: “I found something,” Quentin said. “In Eliot’s room.” Across the table, Julia’s face shifted in the gloom. They hadn’t bothered with a warming enchantment tonight, not a single orb of magic light bobbing overhead. There in the dark with their jackets pulled on. Like they were back in undergrad, just the two of them. Like they didn’t have magic at all. In spite of the chill, a heat had found him. Sweeping over the apples of Quentin’s cheeks in brilliant scarlet whorls. He watched as Julia pinched her brows together, eying him from where she sat. “Okay,” she said, dragging the word out long. “You wanna elaborate on that, Q?” OR What comes after.

[yzafre]

I am sorry this has been bugging me for months. I know you said you don’t like going the route I am about to ask because of fandom discourse. But I genuinely genuinely want to know your opinion on 03 and 12 Raph. I know you like him in tales and in rise. I like your meta posts.

Oh, hey! Pretty sure I know who you are. I don't mind this question! I think my issue last time was the specific question you asked in context of the posts I was putting out at the time. I'm more than happy to talk about my opinions on characters lol.

I think I've talked before about how 03 Raph is one of my favorite Lancers I've seen, but it bears repeating. City at War lives rent free in my head because like. Okay Leo may be spouting the more obviously "morally correct" opinion, but... I'm kinda on Raph's side? They are just 4 kids and this whole situation is WAY too big for them.

He is, generally, really stable for someone who's both a "hot-headed" (though generally he comes across more as "grumpy" to me than having a true dangerous temper, Casey's intro episode not withstanding) and with some emotional repression issues (Tales of Leo and it's character work, my beloved). When he can take a step back, he's got a really steady head on his shoulders.

He strikes me as the most fascinating mix of emotionally competent and emotionally incompetent. Like... There are times when he just gets his brothers - especially Leo - and knows how to give them what they need while they're struggling through their own battles. But he gets overwhelmed by his own emotions - maybe just doesn't even want to touch them, resulting in some of his lashing out?

Ha, sorry, it's been months since I watched an episode of 03, I'm not going to be very coherent on this front.

Honestly, he reminds me a lot of Eliot from Leverage? (To be clear, this is a good thing, I fucking love Leverage). Someone once did a Raph and Don animatic to a clip from Leverage and it was pure perfection.

'12 Raph... Okay, first we need to put this in context: I am generally very "meh" about the character writing in 2012 compared to the other iterations I've seen. And to be clear, this is not to do with the characters themselves per se - on paper I find what they're starting with very interesting - but with the fact the writing direction doesn't seem that interested in exploring them in depth.

And this is fair! It's not the type of story they were telling. But it left me feeling underwhelmed across the board.

That being said! 2012 makes my brain go crunch-crunch-squeak like it's a chew toy, so being a character arc girly I have a long list of things I noticed they could have developed on. (These will probably be synthesized more clearly into a post like my April one after I do a rewatch later this year)

The very first episode set Raph up as the winner of their free-for-all, establishing him as possibly the best pure combatant. I've talked about this with a friend, and we agree Raph as a battle-master in comparison to Leo developing as a strategist/duelist would have been interesting.

On that subject - as weak as I think the Farm House Arc was, Raph there was fascinating. Not just the angst of him staying by Leo's bedside (the heartbreak, the devotion), but also how he interacted with his brothers? The eagerness (*cough* desperation) that he showed in working with Leo to get him back on his feet. His glee on making plans to get Mikey and Donnie back into shape. First: his enthusiasm in being there/supporing his brothers (mostly Leo) is precious. Second: he gives off strong "would become a personal trainer if he was human" vibes that makes me think he... Might be better at taking over team training than Leo would?

It's been noted that Splinter's way of trying to lead him through his anger issues is... Not good. And like. Yeah. I don't think any of the later episodes ever wrapped this little "character arc" well, and I would have been interested in more attention being paid to him finding his own way of handling the issue. I guess there's a "stop making characters use therapy speak, not everyone figures out their emotions" argument to be made about that, but.... I still think it would have been interesting to see him work through it in his own way, even if he didn't ever have perfect control/understanding! Idk

Continuing that thread: multiple things can be true: sometimes Raph blows up in ways that are way out of touch, he can't lose himself every time and enemy gets a good dig in or he will end up dead, and also his brothers need to be kinder to him goddamn. The times when he's genuinely trying but they just keep picking at him. Teenagers, man. Like it's realistic for their age, but I do wish this was a more character-focused narrative so we could see them grow through that.

I think there's something very interesting going on with the "I was just really determined to win" -> ego -> self-perception/self-worth that could be explored

He's got a strong sense of justice, I think? iirc a lot of the time when he's getting worked up about them taking too long/Leo being to cautious, he mentions something along the lines of "the bad guys are out there doing yadda yadda and we're doing nothing and they're getting away with it!" Which is. A lot to unpack there.

For better or worse, his attitude is strongly flavored in the circa 2010... Everything. Like they've all got it but he is peak concentration. There's upsides and downsides to that.

I think 2012 had more missed potential than 2003 from a writing perspective, so it's gone in circles in my mind more, haha. Not to mention the 2012 fic I want to eventually write.

Anyways, yeah! My brain may not have latched on to the Raphs like it did some other characters, but I like them! They've got some fun stuff going on.

[pseudospaceship]

20 Questions for Fanfic Writers

Thank you to @lavenderprose for the tag!

Tagging @rooks-leather-jumpsuit and @redheadsramblings if they're down!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

Four so far. I've only been on Ao3 for a few months. I wrote fics as a kid and didn't come back to it for many, many years, until I discovered it was the only way to deal with the grooves Emmrich Volkarin was eroding into my brain.

2) What’s your AO3 word count?

58,028 and growing.

3) What are your top five fics by Kudos?

Well, I don't have five yet, so I'll just give them in order.

Everything. 205. Short one-shot smut. The first thing I posted on Ao3, which was immediately bombarded with attention I assume because: porn.

The Ferrous Sun Shines on the Living. 79. The Drugs Fic. Emmrich goes a little off the deep end while Rook is in the Fade prison.

Three Days in Arlathan. 61. Another angst-fest: hurt/comfort and pre-relationship bad communication.

The Oracle. 51. Modern AU set just about 3 millennia after the events of Veilguard. Up to chapter 13 of maybe ~20.

My takeaway is y'all want smutty and angsty one-shots. I posted Arlathan two days ago jeez (and yes I might write a smutty sequel for it).

4) What fandoms do you write for?

All Dragon Age all the time. Currently all Emmrook. Sometime I might branch out into Solavellan (someone asked for angst?), but I'm not really confident that I can carry Solas's voice as well as I can Emmrich's. I'm fluent in academic, but Solas is getting more into pre-19th century in a way that I don't quite have the chops for.

5) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, but not always all of them. I try to give comments most of the time, because I know we all want that feedback/validation, but I go back and forth about how important a generic "thanks for reading!" is. I do appreciate you reading, I just don't want to sound transactional about it.

6) What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

So far they're all at least hopeful endings, if not outright happy. Ferrous Sun is probably the angstiest one, that it ends at the very, very beginning of what's got to be a long healing process. I'm capable of them, but ultimately I want only good things for our longsuffering necromancer. :(

7) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

"Everything," definitely. "The Oracle" will be a happy ending, too (sorry spoilers).

8) Do you get hate on fics?

So far none! The Dragon Age fandom and the Emmrich fandom in particular are all very sweet in my experience.

9) Do you write smut?

Oh yes.

10) Do you write crossovers?

Sort of sometimes? I'm working on an AU right now that is a rewrite of a popular adventure film--I don't know if that makes it a true crossover in the current parlance.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Also, not that I know of.

13) Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Not recently. Back in the distant mists of time, my HS friends and I had a very messy round robin that was an unholy amalgamation of the X Files, a few peoples' favorite comics, at least one video game, and probably a number of other things I'm forgetting.

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I mean, Mulder/Scully is the classic, right? That's where the lingo even came from, if I remember correctly (there was even a name for the people who specifically didn't ship them, but I don't remember what it was). I'm pleasantly amused by Destiel, I think Eliot and Hardison probably have amazing angry sex, and it might not count as a ship because the canon hints at the possibility (likelihood?), but Ilisidi/Cenedi from CJ Cherryh's Foreigner series is just way too *chef's kiss* for many reasons.

15) What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

The sequel to my first/only finished (yet unpublished) novel. I love that book so bad and I really, really want those characters to keep going but I can't for the life of me find a plot for them.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Language. I'm good at language. I have an excellent command of the English language gained through years of reading and then years of studying other languages with very different grammar and syntax. I like words and I'm good at putting them together. I'm also good at dialog and, I think, pretty good at character voice, if I know the character well enough.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Plots and endings. Absolute trash. I've slowed down on The Oracle because I'm getting toward the end and I have a Pavlovian fear of it, even though I know mostly how it's going to go.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I won't do it unless I'm sure of it. I'll throw words in sometimes, but if it's a real language I do a lot more work than Google translate to make sure I'm doing something reasonable. In non-fic work I've got dialog in a language that I studied for years and used to translate regularly (gotta get back on that bicycle...), but even then it was very limited and basic. Conlang is different, especially something as half-baked as Dragon Age elvhen. I'm pretty free with that.

As a general rule, though, the reader's comprehension is the most important thing. Any non-English I include will either be reasonably obvious (in mood if not literal translation) through context or will be translated for the reader at some point. If that process of discovery can't be done or isn't important to the story somehow, I'll just find some way to say that the character is speaking another language and therefore isn't comprehensible, or I'll give the dialog in English and tag in the narration what language they're actually speaking.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

Probably Redwall when I was like 10?

20) Favorite fic you’ve written?

Of the ones on Ao3, I like them all for different reasons. Ferrous Sun might eke out the rest just because I wrote a bunch of it on a redeye flight and it still turned out pretty damn good. Though, honestly, given the story maybe that's why it turned out so good.

The crossover I'm working on might be my very favorite, though. I'm being really coy about it on here because I think it's MIND BLOWING and I want all of your minds to be blown, but we'll see how that pans out.

[symphorine]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

tagged by @theheartmold, thank u :>

tagging @howlsmovinglibrary @huldraism @slimyfan @bluemorningsoup <3 kinda long so answers under the cut!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

51! posted over the years since [checks calendar] 2013 dear fucking god. anyone reading this please do not look at those old ones.

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

251,952 words. and that's just what ended up published, on AO3 specifically... (and is still up - i just nuked the 2 hp fics, but there's also a couple i deleted before).

3) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

sighs. all hai//kyuu!! fics (just censoring so it doesn't show up in search) and not even the ones im most proud of. such is the way i suppose. 2016 golden year for my most kudosed fics

Is logic all you've got?

He's beauty, he's grace, he hit Akaashi in the face

Expectations (ok actually i did feel proud of that one)

an actual angel

not too awful

4) What fandoms do you write for?

right now, dragon age! other than that it really varies depending on what I'm really into at the moment. I've done hai//kyuu!! as said before, the danmei guardian, teen wolf, leverage, bg3... thought about writing some stuff for stranger things as well though that never saw the light of outside the google drive.

5) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to. I went through seveal years of not responding, mainly because it felt like a very daunting task emotionally, but I'm trying to be better with it now, especially since I'm being more active as a writer for now.

6) What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i don't really do angsty endings. i guess the one that fits is Princesse, which was a... fairy tail spec fic of sorts? where a side character went off the rails and destroyed the world.

OH WAIT i guess you should have counts? it's certainly not a happy fic :')

7) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i think most of them have happy endings, but probably Brighter than the sun, because so much angst comes before it. they worked for that happy ending (and i did too).

8) Do you get hate on fics?

only once lol and a friend saw it before i did and shut that down. i dont even remember what it said.

9) Do you write smut?

sometimes! took me a long time to be comfortable with it, but i enjoy it now. i wrote a pwp recently :3 touch with your eyes, watch with your hands but I also wrote some smut at the end of A longing that's killing me. and the thing is is short but explicit (rarepair from a rp server... it was fun)

10) Do you write crossovers?

i don't really care for crossovers, so no.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

technically yes... does it count if I did the translation myself? it's a hp fic tho :/ i should probably take that down actually. brb.

back. anyway otherwise no. i absolutely understand the undertaking it is though, if you've ever translated a fic, you have my respect. it's hard!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes - all the plotting, character beats, and most dialogues for A longing that's killing me. were written out first in DMs with @theheartmold :3

14) What’s your all-time favorite ship?

i think the closest is the leverage ot3, parker/hardison/eliot. they are soooooo. so much. shoutout to warden x zevran from dragon age origins also i like many flavors of it.

15) What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

actually none rn! all wips im working on im pretty confident ill finish :3

16) What are your writing strengths?

i've been told i do character emotions really well, and sensory writing (which is nice to hear bc trying to convey setting through several of the characters' senses is something i put effort in!! )

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

writer's block ✌️ but seriously, natural-sounding dialogue is hard, and sticking to a direction for the story as well. it's easy to get lost in other themes. because english is my second language, i also get confused about proper use of some words or structure, and it's very annoying, and the internet doesn't always help.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

i think it's fine, but you have to prepare yourself for it being just off if you yourself aren't fluent in it. there's also a difference between writing full sentences in other languages (i.e. two characters are speaking in another language, and that is transcribed) vs peppering foreign words into your fic, which lends itself more easily to being... kind of ridiculous looking, depending on how you do it.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

d.gray-man or bleach. can't be assed to go find my old account to look sorry :') that was back in like... 2011

20) Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

this is gonna be a long-ish answer.

Brighter than the sun still means a lot to me despite a somewhat tumultuous history. I wrote it first as a gift for someone I was dating at the time; before i posted the second part, we broke up (the relationship was emotionally toxic, and reached a breaking point when they cheated on me), and for a long time that second part sat in my docs untouched. I couldn't bring myself to look at it. but I remember having a lot of fun working on it, and I was proud of it as well - it felt like a solid story for once, and i liked writing something longer than usual. I eventually removed that person as a giftee and posted the second part anyway without rereading, just in case people were still wanting the end, and i got some lovely and compassionate comments/messages. i think, for what it represents for me personally - a pretty rough time in my life, but also growth and pride as a writer, and the kind words of strangers - it's still very special to me.

honorable mentions to Expectations (made me feel like i touched a lot of people), So hold my hand, I'll walk with you (apparently motivated someone to write their own fic!!! insane), and A longing that's killing me. (really fun to write and it was an absoluyte joy to share with Julian as i progressed). back home is also shaping up to be a favorite!

ty for reading if u made it this far :')

[vampiritea]

I'm rewatching Leverage right now so some random questions for you:

What's your favorite season of Leverage?

What's your favorite episode that's not on said season?

What's your favorite character that's not in more than two episodes?

What's your favorite character/person that one of them has pretended to be?

Who's someone who was on Leverage that hasn't been on Leverage Redemption that you would like to see again?

idk how I became a leverage blog when I only consider myself a casual fan lol

So anyway I've enlisted my sister @werewolfsmile to also answer these questions. You get double answers!! 🥳

v = vampiritea w = werewolfsmile

What's your favorite season of Leverage?

v: bestie I don't even remember where each season begins and ends, how am I supposed to answer this? w: 3 - for all the Eliot angst (honestly 3,4,5 are the best but. 3) v: I'm gonna go with s5

What's your favorite episode that's not on said season?

v: um, idk, the Gone Fishin' Job? w: the Rundown Job s5. ot3 feels to the extreme!

Who's your favorite character that's not in more than two episodes?

v: the Sheriff deputy in the Bank Shot Job. my man is underrated 😌 w: -prolonged deep thought- it would have to be Quinn and Mikel

Who's your favorite character/person that one of them has pretended to be?

v: I actually have an answer for this!!!!! oh but it's not in Leverage, it's in Redemption. I love when Harry pretends to be Eliot in The Walk in the Woods Job (ty w for the episode title) w: I think I have to go with Roy Chappell. Just so fun to see Eliot get sucked into baseball.

Who's someone who was on Leverage that hasn't been on Leverage Redemption that you would like to see again?

v: um. I do not know. w: Quinn, Mikel, Tara, Shelley, Sterling (v: if I let her continue I think she'll end up listing every side character so we're stopping here.) v: Tara could be fun to bring back

Hope you enjoy your rewatch!! ✨

[titsthedamnseason]

For the love interests of Ben, Beckett, Eliot, and Charlie, (Harriett, Jo, Winnifred, and Roxanne) who do you think are inexperienced/virgins? I didn’t include Leo (but you can share your thoughts on this :)) the tension between him and Beckett is so good - I’m very interested in the Beckett x Jo x Leo dynamic). And do you think we’ll see any of them (Cobalt bros) being into BDSM? I was trying to run it through my head, but I wanted to hear your thoughts on it. I’m very nervous but also excited for the Cobalt Empire series! I’m glad that the first book is Ben’s!

And I am SO excited for Eliot/Winnifred. The fucking angst and drama is going to be delicious. Actual Romeo and Juliet. It’s going to be so so good. The drama between the families is going to be insane. I am here for it. The lady told Eliot that he is going to help the voiceless (Winnifred) find their voice but it won’t be without consequence, and I’m a little nervous. I wonder what will happen. I also love Xander and Spencer. I’m so soft for them.

I’m sorry for the long ask and if my ask was too much! Have a lovely day!!🥰❣️

this ask is slightly insane but i’ve decided to entertain it.

i would be pretty surprised if jo or leo are virgins. i guess we don’t know very much about leo at all but i just imagine they are both experienced in my head

harriet we know is not totally new to sex because of that unfortunate situation with the professor (which actually i’ve been meaning to talk about for some time now. what an INSANE thing for her to do “for luna” when yes, they were definitely friends, but from my reading not THAT close. i don’t know if there’s anyone in my life i would do that for and definitely not my super rich casual friend who would totally be okay in life if she failed one college class. i need to find out more of the reasoning / story behind this because as unhinged as they always are this seems like an especially wild plot line from kbr)

roxanne is probably the most likely to be a virgin just because of the whole “soft girl” narrative kbr are trying to create for her, especially in contrast to charlie. winnifred we truly know next to nothing about (the least out of everyone barring tom’s love interest) so it’s extremely difficult to say not knowing anything about her personality. however, if i had to guess i would guess that she IS a virgin bc kbr love having their main female characters lose their virginity to the male love interests. it’s totally a thing

i’m also super excited for beckettjoleo!!! i feel like from what we know beckett might be the most into bdsm (or adjacent) stuff and i was originally going to say none of the rest of them but tbh kbr love doing those weird parallels between the sex scenes with the core six and their respective children 🤢 so god help us all

forbidden love is one of my favorite tropes in the world so i’m also very excited. it’s very hard to make forbidden love stories convincing in the real world and not seem stupid but kbr have already set it up to be actually realistic and believable in terms of why it would be forbidden so im really looking forward to it

XANDERSPENCER SUPREMACY SAY IT AGAIN 🗣️🗣️🗣️ i am very impatiently waiting for their book and i can’t wait to start getting crumbs during the cobalt empire about what shape their narrative will take!!

[lochnesswriter]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks to @mayalaen for tagging me! (way too long ago lol)

First, my AO3

How many works do you have on AO3?

65

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

218,144

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Leverage, White Collar, 9-1-1 Lone Star, 9-1-1, MCU, Political Animals, Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG1, Supernatural

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ice Cream and Therapy, First Dance, An Unexpected Party, Tales of Batman: Interlude I and The First Time

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, but sometimes I get miserably behind and then have to catch up all at once. But I cherish every one and I do enjoy interacting with readers

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Um, I'm not much for angst, but I guess Stay With Me. It's SPN/Leverage, and deals with Dean's demon deal

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Never Sees It Coming (Stargate Atlantis)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really, which I appreciate.

9. Do you write smut?

Not at all. I write a lot of spankings though, so different kink

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I love writing crossovers, and most of my fics have at least two fandoms involved. That said, the craziest one is absolutely Curse You, Steve the Seal, which is a crack drabble crossing Hawaii Five-0 with Phineas and Ferb (last time I ever ask for a fanfic prompt from someone who doesn't actually read/write fanfics.) But a close second would be Merry Christmas to All, and to All a Sore Butt, which I just finished. Leverage/White Collar/9-1-1/9-1-1 Lone Star, and an AU of two of my preexisting AUs. That was a wild ride.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Don't think so, though that would be cool.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not fanfic, no. I do have one series posted with a co-creator, but I am still waiting for said co-creator to actually co-create something instead of just throwing more prompts at me lol

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Not sure? I have ships I like, ships I don't like, but I don't know. Favorite to watch is probably Tarlos and Malec (helps that they're canon lol). Favorites to write would be Eliot/Quinn/Neal and John/Evan/Cam ( I love the polyamory lol)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Um. All the ones that I'm spending thought on, I probably will manage to finish? Otherwise I probably don't care about them enough at the moment to notice if I don't?

16. What are your writing strengths?

I love dialogue. It's so fun to just see what the hell the characters are gonna say/do next

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Description and action. I can't actually picture anything in my head, so I find myself baffled that people might actually care about what the setting looks like/what's going on

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I won't do it, because I don't speak another language well enough and I don't trust Google translate, but if need be I'll probably pull a "she said in this language." When people do put other languages in dialogue I get frustrated that I can't read it, but I also understand that that's what it's like for the characters, too, so fair enough

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Supernatural and Leverage (so many crossovers you guys)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I don't even know, I love all of them. At the moment, though, I've got a fondness for both Goodnight Moon and the follow-up Goodnight Nobody. They're Bucky-TJ fics that are just kinda cute and feelsy.

tagging (with no pressure or obligation): @actualalligator @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @trivalentlinks @friendly-chaos @snowviolettwhite and anybody else who wants to play! Please tag me so I can see your stuff 💜

[6thofapril1917]

3, 4 and 5 for the ask meme!

3. Who is your favorite character? Why?

ohhhhhh this is a really hard one. i’d say it’s a toss-up between bill and augustin?? bill won me over with his beautiful hair, great accent, gayboy swag, and his willingness to just Tell It Like He Sees It much to jock’s chagrin. augustin became my other fav the SECOND he pulled out that bitchy-ass eliot line. scream

4. Do you have a favorite episode? What about it makes it your favorite?

EPISODE FIVE BABY!!!! it’s got everything. eoin angst. the free french. and of course That Scene (you know the one). 10/10 no notes

5. Is there a specific scene that is your favorite on the show?

oh god oh fuck uhhhhh. it’s gotta be a tie between paddy going to find eoin’s body in the desert and paddyaugustin homoerotic russian roulette/sand wrestling

[nellie-elizabeth]

for the write ask meme: 4, 11, 19?

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

Honestly I don't know! They have to come to me organically. I've had ideas arise out of dreams, or I've read fics in one fandom that utilized a certain trope, and I've found myself musing how I'd apply that trope elsewhere... some of my best stuff just came to be spur of the moment and I wrote it down in a flurry of activity. Other ideas for AUs just came because I really liked a movie and wanted to write an AU...

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

Impossible to say my favorites, I have a real fondness for a lot of the stuff I've written! I'll pick three I'm proud of that I hope more people will check out...

When Quentin Met Eliot which is I think my most polished, well-realized romance novel.

Regrets, of the Absence Thereof, my favorite one-shot and maybe my favorite smut I've ever written.

fought my way back and the series that continues it - the hardest I've ever worked on a writing project ever. (in collaboration with @portraitofemmy!)

19. What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

I tend to be a very light tagger and only put in major warnings, with more details added in to the author's notes of specific fics/chapters. So, my most-used tags, unsurprisingly, is the utilitarian and oft-relevant: "angst".

Thanks for asking!!

[myalchod]

6, 20, and 25 🎉

jsyk I hate you for that middle one. 😝 Affectionately, as always.

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time? Short answer: yes. Long answer: yes, but I'm not going to name names because I'll leave someone out and then feel horrible about it. But I absolutely have comfort fics that I'll go back and reread, and I adore the fact that they exist. 💙

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written? Titles suck. You're getting a couple, though, because I'm feeling indecisive, and because I've got several different habits in titling that I feel like I should hit separately. I went to poetry for the Musketeers AU series I wrote, specifically T.S. Eliot's Four Quartets, and of those my favourite title was probably Currents of Action, which seemed to fit for an epistolary fic intended to bridge the five-year gap between two arcs. Occasionally I'll go for titles that owe nothing to either poetry or song lyrics, and of those I think the one I like best might be from back in my Battlestar Galactica reboot days, for the Common People challenge -- which I think was also the first 5+1 fic I wrote, in hindsight. Five Ways to Lose Your Faith (and One To Find It) absolutely got jossed as the show went on, but I'll always have a soft spot for it. Also: Leonard Cohen. Just that. That's the answer.

25. Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing? Lmfaoooooooooooooo well. Sort of? I'm far more likely to end up screaming with laughter because I know how much it should upset me but I'm too busy delighting in how much it will upset other people instead. I think the closest I've gotten to this recently, as far as stuff that's already posted, was the moment Luna conjured an illusion of Farah in what stays and what fades away, because that was entirely unplanned and I was absolutely the screaming cat GIF once I realised what I'd just written. (And then I cackled, but that's another story.) Honourable mention to can't rest here for the ongoing resistance of Those Two Idiots to my attempts to smoosh their stupid faces together despite their insistence on wallowing in their angst instead, but that's an entirely different sort of upset.

[ ask me another | all answers ]

[my-beloved-lakes]

Fic writer 20 questions

@ghostlyarchaeologist thanks for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

five.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

20,909

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Pretty much only leverage, although I have one OFMD fic on ao3 and I started working on a librarians fic a while ago but never finished it. Also a Sirens (UK) fic that I posted on my side blog and totally forgot about until now.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I only have five posted so there’s not much point ranking them.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Sometimes. Just kinda depends on the mood I’m in.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This isn’t one I posted on ao3, but the short ficlet I did for @leveragetober ‘s prompt 24: Blood was probably the angstiest ending I've written.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably the ficlet I did for @leveragetober ‘s prompt 5: birthday.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

None so far :)

9. Do you write smut?

Nope! 

10. Do you write crossovers?

I wrote one white collar/leverage crossover for @leveragetober ‘s prompt list. There’s a few other crossover ideas that I would like to write.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge. 

13. Have you ever co written a fic before?

No, but I might like to try it.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Hmm, probably Parker x Hardison. But it’s rude of you to make me choose!

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I was working on this one where Eliot had to fake his death and then disappear for a while, but for whatever reason he was only able to involve Nate in the planning and wasn’t able to say goodbye to anyone else. Anyways lots of angst was going to ensue, but there were so many plot holes that I couldn't figure out, so it never got finished. 

16. What are your writing strengths?

Coming up with new plot ideas.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Finishing said plot ideas :(

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I usually try to avoid it. i just don't want to mess it up.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sirens (UK).  well technically Tolkien, but we don’t talk about that. I was like seven. It doesn't count! I wrote it on some scrap paper and I'm pretty sure I burned it several years ago so that no one could ever find it.

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

Excuse me, those are like my children! Can a mother choose a favorite child?... It’s The Here to Stay Job.

tagging: @just-fandomthings and @katbratsupernaturalwhore

[penhive]

Journal Dated 31st March 2025

An Idiom

Turn your nets to the other side

This idiom has a Biblical shade meaning. The disciples of Jesus were fishing all night and they caught no fish and then Jesus told them to turn their nets to the other side and lo they were able to haul a bounty catch.

Turn your nets to the other side as an idiom mean rerouting and redirecting one’s actions to yield better and positive results.

I am turning my nets to the other side.

Notes on Imagism

Imagism is one of my favorite tenets in literature. The advocates of imagism were poets and their names are Ezra Pound, T S Eliot and E E Cummins. Now what is imagism?  The tropes used in imagism have an intellectual clarity and an aesthetic sincerity.  Some examples of imagism are:

Dew lay like butter on the grass.

His nail is a grown fang.

Poets are dancing in the air.

Dead leaves are reciting a requiem.

The body is poetry to taste.

Reason is irony and passion honey.

Sunset is speaking the language of colors.

Rain sounded like a drum on the roof.

Poetry is the language of flowers.

Pot is ecstasy for the mind.

The lizard danced on the wall like an acrobat.

Sex for her is freezer of frigidity.

He is as crafty as a serpent.

Passion is the broth of the body.

The mind is a pendulum swinging to and fro.

Lovers in the college were bantering in the sugar corner.

Ecstasy is the fountain of joy.

Her lips smiled as gold.

Lust is a pasture that tempts.

She is a seductive lipstick.

The drum shouted in joy.

A writer’s eloquence is the pen.

Morning is mewing.

Let the pen be rite friendly

Clouds spoke the language of poems.

Time is a serpent that crawls on the clock.

The sky had a sunny attitude.

Ants are a marching army of precision.

Sex is the language of music.

He kissed her petals with love.

Writing is the muse of creation.

Angst wears on like a sack of heaviness.

The sound of the violin had a musk fragrance.

My suitcase is wanderlust to travel.