#elfy talks

[mimefish]

nevermind everyone winner's symbolism cancelled. we cannot have another scar earth/mercury/comet situation again. I vote we all lay down our weapons and join hands in peace and accept that the one true symbol for Joel is the Car. wherever he goes whatever flavour of symbols you particularly enjoy. Car. Just Car. Because it would be really funny

[mimefish]

jellie emote

[desultory-novice]

Tis a TRAGEDY!! /lh

At the start of every month, the official JP Kirby portal site loads up with all the new merch we can expect that season. And at the start of every month (g-give or take a day) Dess peruses it for items of interest. ...Typically Marx and or Magolor.

BUT WHAT SHOULD I FIND THIS TIME!?

THEY'VE BEEN SEPARATED!! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Marx and Magolor, known for years for sneaking onto merch together in suspicious ways, now make an appearance on this "Kirby and friends" (lolol) sticker pack on utterly separate sheets!

...I shall cry. It's too cruel...

(Fufufu. Still, how should I take this piece of merch's branding? OUR Marx? Upgraded to a "nakama-tachi?" Still, I think it's funny that he's about as "friendly" as a Gordo. At least we had a Waddle Doo helper in Star Allies! "Kirby and Friends who will stab or shoot you. Or both, in Marx's case!" ...Gordo friend... Gordo friend...)

IN OTHER NEWS...

...the long awaited [Animal] plush is coming out! (Animal gets a tiny plastic figurine too!) Which I know will excite some people! The fur looks super fuzzy too! (...DMK? Mage Sisters? Who??)

Lastly, Marx finally makes a long awaited return (in reference form) to the Kirby Cafe (take-out vers.) since the sad disappearance of the shockingly gorey Marx-themed Eggplant and Meat Pasta and his amazing themed drink, le Mariage êntre Mensonges et Vérité

That's right! It's the "Popstar Blueberry ~ Milky Way Wishes" cake! And I love the use of the deep blue mirror (?) glaze with what could be edible gold sprinkles or just kinako powder for the stars XD

...Less excited about the blueberry filling but that's just me!

[catebees]

Wahhh why is designing a good winter palace outfit so harddd

[heliomanteia]

I feel so sentimental about an elven Mourn Watcher Rook.

They're an elf, treated as an elf anywhere outside of their home (where people are used to them and know them personally), but they're an orphan without a clan or vallaslin and their connection to their heritage is at most tangential. They're too bare-faced to feel entirely too comfortable with the Dalish and they're too pointy-eared to feel at ease with non-elves and they're too powerful to be easily accepted by city elves, especially in places like Tevinter. An elf and a necromancer is a bit too much for most to handle, bigotry considered. Necropolis is their only home, the undead most frequent company.

They probably read a lot of books on elven magic and studied the Fade enough to know facts and stories and rites. They know elven gods but they're not exactly their gods, not anymore for sure. They have a culture to mourn (especially with the gods being back) but they also feel like a constant trespasser on the history they learned as an outsider. They have elven friends at the Watch who are as alienated as them. They study the language the way an outsider would. They pay respect to elven graves but the names bear no meaning; they themself probably wear a name that isn't even elven.

When they get to actually face their ancient past in the flesh, they don't know how to feel. Do they feel guilt and remorse? Are they too separated from the People to care? They know tradition but they didn't grow up with it implanted in their head as the only way to exist, so surely stepping away from it could be easier for them. Is it?

[mimefish]

local british men discover vitamin d and fresh air, stun in new pics (shoutout to joel smallishbeans for undergoing this changed complexion phenomenon not once but twice and one of them only temporarily)

what is this specific phenomenon called

[raviollies]

Lunarbells

[eddie-rifff]

really really really considering moving to scotland for good. all my life ive been like nooo im too attached to maryland and my family and my house but this country is falling apart and it’s been like 100 degrees every day for a month and the highs in the city in scotland id move to are in the 60s. ill miss shelby terribly but i cant fucking take it here

[amxnn]

🎬 - Peaky Blinders

[mimefish]

don't worry op!!!! I put them in an enclosure to make sure they don't wander off and nothing bad happens to them :]

hey guys I’m gonna turn in for the night. mind watching after my blorbos for me? make sure nothing happens to them! thanks <3

[love-toxin]

how dare nintendo make totk link so 🥺 freaking 🥺 cute 🥺 <333

[mimefish]

is this anything

[galianbeast]

not much of an urianger fan but i think he deserves better than thancred. i need urianger to start seeing estinien as his bestie instead actually

[deafeninggardenerpanda]

when i had my last shop update with the magolor charms i was also supposed to get some new freebie stickers made, but i was kinda burnt out + i still have a lot of the freebie stickers i usually give out, so i didnt

anyways i kinda feel awkward giving people like. the exact same freebie stickers if they happen to reorder so if that happened to anyone reading this SORRY LMAO im getting my ass into gear now. i was gonna wait until my next store drop (including some really cool goods im really excited for btw i cant wait to show them off) to have new freebie stickers but thats gonna be like 2 months out still so here we go its new stickers design time now

[sketch-elf]

When you recognize that someone in the room is like you but not knowing whether it's like a gender thing or an orientation thing or a disability thing or a mental illness thing or

[sufficientlylargen]

It always gets me that the name "Gandalf" literally just means "Wand-Elf" or "Stick-Elf". I'm imagining old Gondorians just being like:

Librarian: I saw that weird guy at the library again today.

Guard 1: What weird guy?

Librarian: The old guy with the beard? Kinda elfy-looking, apart from the beard?

Guard 1: Oh, with the big-ass stick?

Librarian: Yeah, looked like he was carrying an entire tree branch.

Guard 2: Yeah, that's the Stick Elf.

Guard 1: Hell yeah, I fuckin' love the Stick Elf.

Librarian: The "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: He comes by every few years, usually after some weird book or other.

Librarian: Oh. Yeah, he wanted a treatise on goblin breeding habits.

Guard 2: Like, how they have sex? We have books on that?

Librarian: Yeah, turns out we do. I was as surprised as you are.

Guard 1: What'd the Stick Elf need a fuckin' goblin-fuckin' book for?

Librarian: I didn't ask. So you just call him "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: I mean, he looks kinda elfy and he always has that stick, so, like, yeah.

Guard 1: Dude also has some fuckin' dope pipeweed.

Guard 2: Oh yeah, his pipeweed is awesome.

Librarian: How long has he been coming here?

Guard 2: Oh, for decades. He's, like, super old.

Guard 1: More like fuckin' centuries. Dude's old as balls.

Guard 2: Wait, really?

Guard 1: Yeah, my gran-gran used to talk about him. She loved his pipeweed too.

Librarian: So he's… an immortal pipeweed dealer?

Guard 2: I think he's just, like, a connoisseur. He doesn't sell it or anything. He just always has some really top-notch pipeweed on him.

Archivist: Oh, are we talking about Stick Elf?

Guard 1: Hell yeah we are!

Librarian: You know about the Stick Elf, too?

Archivist: Oh, totally. Stick-Elf's a super chill dude. Gave me some awesome pipeweed when I was maybe 12, and tee-bee-aitch I think I'm still a little buzzed from it.

Guard 1: What'd I tell ya, fuckin' dope pipeweed!

Archivist: Also he's really old.

Guard 1: Old as balls.

Librarian: Yeah, so Éodan and Jenniforomir were telling me.

Archivist: My grandpa used to tell me stories - he said one time he saw Stick Elf enter a smoke-ring contest.

Guard 1: Ooh, I'll bet he kicked fuckin' ass.

Archivist: Apparently the guy made an entire warship out of smoke and it flew around shooting down the other rings.

Librarian: And how much of this "fuckin' dope" pipeweed had your grandfather had by this point?

Guard 1: No no, that's totally plausible. Dude's got weird elf powers and shit for sure.

Archivist: He brought fireworks for the king's birthday one year, too.

Guard 1: Oh fuck, I forgot about those! Fuckin' incredible fireworks! Dragons and knights and glowy trees and shit! I was fuckin' 6 years old or something, they totally blew my mind. Hey Éodan, did you see that shit?

Guard 2: No, I think that's before I lived in Gondor.

Guard 1: Wait, you're not from here?

Guard 2: Oh, no, I grew up in Rohan. We moved here when I was, like, thirteen because my uncle Éojeff said he could get my dad a sweet job. And also that there were houses that didn't smell like horseshit.

Guard 1: Oh shit, are you related to Éojeff and Éosteve who run that æbleskiver stand on Norndîl St?

Guard 2: Yeah, they're my uncles!

Guard 1: Shit, they cook a fuckin' great æbleskiver!

Librarian: Ok, hold up a sec, "Stick Elf" can't possibly be his real name.

Guard 1: Why not?

Librarian: What? You think his parents named him in the hopes that he would carry around a fucking tree when he got older?

Guard 2: Maybe they gave him the tree when he was born!

Archivist: I don't think a baby could carry that stick.

Guard 1: You ever seen a baby hanging onto something? They're hella strong.

Archivist: It's not a strength thing, their hands are tiny. That staff is enormous!

Guard 1: My halberd's bigger 'n I am, I can hold it just fine.

Archivist: You're not a baby.

Librarian: Also why would elf parents name their kid "stick ELF"?! Presumably they know that their kid's going to be an elf!

Archivist: Is he actually an elf? I didn't think they grew beards.

Guard 1: How'd he get old as balls if he's not an elf?

Guard 2: His ears aren't that pointy. Maybe he's just a really old guy? Like, a Numémoriam or something?

Guard 1: Did you just say "Numémoriam"?

Guard 2: Nûnenorman? Munimõrbitan? Y'know, those guys like the king that can get super old.

Guard 1: You mean the fuckin' Númenóreans?

Guard 2: Yeah, the Númenóreums.

Archivist: Even the Númenóreans don't live THAT long.

Guard 1: Plus he carries that fuckin' stick around.

Guard 2: Wait, what does the stick have to do with it?

Guard 1: That's an elf thing. Y'know, trees and shit? Very elfy.

Librarian: Ok, look, but his parents naming him "Stick Elf" would be weird whether or not he's an elf. In fact, it's even weirder if he's not - what human names their kid "elf"?

Archivist: Huh. Yeah, you're right, he probably does have another name.

Guard 2: Yeah, I guess so.

Librarian: He's been coming here for decades and nobody's ever asked his real name?

Archivist: I dunno what to tell you, he's Stick Elf. Even his library card just says 'Stick Elf'.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah, the Stick Elf!

Guard 2: Maybe we could, like, ask him his name sometime?

Guard 1: Hey, look, Elrond's over there. He's old as balls too, maybe he knows?

Guard 2: Oh, we shouldn't interru-

Guard 1: HEY ELROND, YOU'RE OLD AS BALLS, RIGHT? WHAT'S THAT OLD ELF WITH THE STICK'S NAME?

Elrond (coming over): Do you mean an old man cloaked all in grey and blue, leaning on a rough-cut staff, who came to the great library this day?

Guard 1: Yeah, the Stick-Elf!

Guard 2: (Sorry to bother you, sir...)

Librarian: He's got to have a real name besides 'the Stick Elf', right?

Elrond: Indeed, for no elf is he. You speak of the wizard Olórin, wisest of the Maiar, older even than Eä itself. Many are his names in many countries: Tharkûn among the Dwarves; Incánus to the south; Mithrandir he is called among my people, the Grey Pilgrim.

Librarian: Oh.

Elrond: And here in the North he is called Stick-Elf.

Librarian: Oh.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah!