#eldritch being that is interested in a certain human ? love them in the way we cant understand ?

[lausterdomyamong]

Can anyone please write nanook x reader. I need cosmic gender-natural d inside me rn. I need nanook, I need them so bad.

[aces-come-in-spades]

NOBODY LIKES THE OPENING BAND!: CHARACTER MASTERLIST

Please read all of the following information. This covers some basic in-universe mechanics and provides enough background information to interact with the characters, as well as some info on the characters themselves.

(btw. obligatory fuck you ryan seaman before we continue. i dont support that dickhead <333)

BE ADVISED: HEAVY RELIGIOUS THEMES, SUICIDE, AND GENOCIDE ARE DISCUSSED BELOW!

Nobody Likes the Opening Band! is a non-sequential series of fanfictions inspired by the bands I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME (idkhow) and Waterparks, and draws places, people, and other elements from each band's respective lore. Currently only one work, The Paris Manuscript, is being written. It is available to read on AO3. There is a planned second work, Nobody Likes the Opening Band, that will eventually exist.

Nobody Likes the Opening Band! mostly revolves around the plot of the second work, with the Manuscript serving as a sort of prequel. In Opening Band, a new family moves to the town Ryan Seaman lives in, and Ryan is determined to learn what secrets their son Dal is hiding. In the process of trying to uncover Dal's secrets, Ryan discovers Gloomtown, an anti-Purgatory where certain souls who suffered a great deal during their lives or whose lives were cut off before they could have much meaning go to rest before the end of the world. Gloomtown is also the world's source of magic.

In order to fully learn the truth about Dal, Ryan is forced to team up with his ex-friend and current arch-nemesis Awsten Knight, and Paris, a spirit from Gloomtown whose attatched himself to Awsten.

Gloomtown has an incredibly powerful energy that leaks through to Earth, where it soaks into the DNA of random people and mutates it. This mutation allows the person, once they are born, to inherit magical powers once they are 13. Powers can be literally anything.

PASCAL "CAL" PHYLLIS (#cal phyllis)

the only child of the couple that adopted ryan. he has a soul of gold and the strangest humor you've ever seen. his particularly likes to joke about being a capitalist (he is anything but one). also a fantastic matchmaker despite his inability to get a boyfriend! he just wants to kiss someone :<

the only main character without any magic powers. he makes up for it by being the best fucking cupcake baker you've ever met.

(he/him, gay, no magic. birthday october 4.)

likes: baking, eldritch horror, cats, playing pranks hates: messy spaces, tea fun fact: he starts out by crushing on dal but eventually loses interest. rumor has it he's secretly dating a boy named mikey way ;)

PARIS EVANGELINE (#paris)

harley's youngest and most difficult child. he's a shapeshifter and is a (literal) being of chaos.

he was born with his soul outside and detached from his body. he wears it on a chain around his neck, but since this is unnatural he's not quite right. using his powers drain him so he's almost always tired, but he tries to hide it via masking. also his wings don't really get used because flying drains him way more than magic.

due to all of this (and all the bullying his siblings did to him when he was younger, they are incredibly ableist and a few are homophobic) harley wouldn't let him out of gloomtown until one day, they introduced star to paris! at which point paris and star basically became a did system. (more on this when we get to star)

in order to stay alive, paris has to take pieces of human souls and attach them to his soul. he likes to latch onto certain people he really likes and refer to them as his host. at the time of nobody likes the opening band, awsten is paris's current host.

he's super duper flirty and touchy and emotional. and also wears whatever the fuck he wants because he's trying to appeal to humans and to him this means showing off a lot of skin, so he wears crop tops and shorts a lot (he loves them dw)

(genderfluid but often presents as male, pansexual, universal manifestation of chaos. no known birthday.)

likes: raising a ruckus, geese, gummy bears, cuddling hates: whaaaaaaaaat? hating something? impossible! he would never! ahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!! fun fact: he started out as my version of waterparks' character soulsucker but he literally turned into an oc this thing is nothing like the real soulsucker.

STAR AVALON EVANGELINE (#star)

paris's guardian.... demon? ghost? spirit who is basically an alter. when paris is stressed/anxious/upset or physically injured/in danger star will assume paris's physical form while paris takes on star's ghost form. star basically gets to have a body for once while paris recovers.

star is a gloom, a type of demon that was created to originally oversee and care for gloomtown. harley wasn't very big on them, seeing them as useless since harley was the new ruler of the place, so all the glooms were wiped out. star had snuck out and was exploring earth and thus escaped death, but they were captured on return and given to paris as a protector. one of star's wings was ripped out of their back, so they hide their wing under jackets cuz they're embarrassed to have anyone find out about this.

due to all the shit that's happened, star tends to close others off and acts incredibly hostile towards most people. they're really only soft towards paris and anyone that is a host/close to a host.

sometimes calls themself avalon for fun

(they/them, aromantic, the last gloom in gloomtown. doesn't actually have a birthday but likes to celebrate it on november 2.)

likes: no one knows hates: everything, if their attitude is anything to go off of fun fact: star was the st*rfucker to soulsucker. again, it got way out of hand <33

HARLEY EVANGELINE (#harley)

a seraphim who, while fallen, never actually committed any sin. they were punished by getting reassigned to ruling gloomtown, and they wield this authority mercilessly. their divinity is what allows gloomtown to affect humans and give them magic.

somehow, they managed to give birth to 100 children.

there really isnt much known about them. they present themself as a benevolent and kind figure, but they hide a much more sinister and cruel personality

(they/she, aceflux, guardian of gloomtown. no known birthday.)

likes: no one knows. hates: no one knows this either. fun fact: they were inspired by bart harley jarvis from idkhow's music video for the song "WHAT LOVE?" (bart is this pink illuminati pyramid thing)

honorable mentions

RYAN SEAMAN: the protagonist of Nobody Likes the Opening Band and Cal's brother. He wasn't born with the Gloomtown DNA mutation, but accidentally fell into Gloomtown while conscious and met Maxx, a very temperamental snake who followed Ryan home and bit him. Ryan now has fangs and can discharge deadly venom by biting, but he usually tries to avoid using this power. Also, Maxx lives in his skin as a tattoo. LIAM FORD: ryan's ex-best friend, who killed himself when he was barely even thirteen after escaping the clutches of tellexx, a research company that had kidnapped and tortured him one summer. he now haunts the town as a ghost.

honorable mentions open for asks

AWSTEN KNIGHT (#awsten): (he/him, bisexual) the local spellcaster, enchantment weaver, and potion-brewer with a fondness for doing the most insane and impulsive shit you've ever seen. he's also paris's current host and claims that paris is a little bitch (which he can be, to be fair). he and ryan used to be friends, fell out after liam's suicide, and some time after dal moves to town, they become friends again before they eventually start dating.

DALLON "DAL" WEEKES (#dal weekes): (he/him, straight) harley's favorite brat, who went "MIA," so to speak. for a few years after extracting his powers from himself. ryan, awsten, and paris had to work together to return dal's powers. He is known as vengeance, and his magic allows him to summon knives that inflict death or a curse on anyone pierced by one. he's also suffered a lot of emotional abuse and experiences a good deal of religious guilt.

[adamworu]

I would like to hear your thought about what this brand new Kaworu analysis video said on YT: He does get interested in Shinji, but merely in agape love way, especially when the early draft that showed Kawoshin as not at all subtle, but it got rejected in the end. Therefore we should view Kaworu as he is in the final product: way less blatantly homoerotic, but his entire character history and biography also had to change. He is now pretty much Adam himself in the final product, very different what he was originally planned to be. Which is why his homoerotic traits need to be reevaluted within the context of the final product. He is a deity representative of an idealized version of Shinji's psyche, inability to contact with people outside of universal speech and with selfless righteousness regarding morality. The way he connects with Shinji may appear as romantic, but to suggest a god-like character of his bg and role could conceptualize having a romantic relationship with a human he had planned to kill indrectily makes no sense within the story. It was clear to the audience that he was not human and did not see thing from a human POV, but he also calls all humans Lilin, suggesting he sees Shinji as an other. Apparently Kaworu was even directly modeled after Jesus Christ. If Kaworu was romantically attracted to Shinji, it would mean he is an emotional sadist who finds broken people attractive, would be capable of falling in love with with a complete stranger within 24 hours of meeting them, and that he's capable of full human emotions. None of these add up given Kaworu's history and behaviour, which is why Kaworu's love feels more like an agape kind, as he likely doesn't understand love like a human would. His screentime is also so short that it's hard to fully understand him as a character.

He does get interested in Shinji, but merely in agape love way, especially when the early draft that showed Kawoshin as not at all subtle, but it got rejected in the end. Therefore we should view Kaworu as he is in the final product: way less blatantly homoerotic, but his entire character history and biography also had to change. He is now pretty much Adam himself in the final product, very different what he was originally planned to be.

I'm not really fond of the 'agape love' angle for a few reasons. Sure, Kaworu is altruistic, but that doesn't undermine his romantic feeling toward Shinji. Kaworu's status as an angel is used as a counterpoint to say that he doesn't quite love like people can. That the love he can/does process is that of God to His children. I express this exact same grievance to the 'worthy of my grace' angle from the retranslation of Netflix's Evangelion.

Also more discussion under the cut.

(Warning for mentions of self-harm)

The point of angels and humans, or hell, any thing that seems vastly different is that we're more alike than meets the eye. Angels are treated as these eldritch beings, and make no mistake they still are in some ways...but they understand emotions too. Emotions aren't a human-exclusive complexity. Since we're here, Evangelion isn't about the human condition. The similarity culminates in End of Evangelion, where Misato states to Shinji that humans and angels are basically the same. The greatest difference is our progenitor.

Kaworu's characterization didn't take an absolute overhaul. He's not a transfer student or owning a cat, sure. Certain things are more subtle than others, such as Kaworu's deep fears. The draft manifests Kaworu's vulnerabilities via self-harm scars on the wrist. Or even the dark implications extracted from the words 'because living is so difficult.' Kaworu's issue in the final cut is a subtle anxiety not easily gleaned by action alone and that's a topic I'll cover further down this thread.

Kaworu is Adam on virtue of housing their soul. Given that Adam is the mother of angels, Kaworu is by proxy, his own mother.

He is a deity representative of an idealized version of Shinji's psyche, inability to contact with people outside of universal speech and with selfless righteousness regarding morality.

Kaworu is not a deity and neither is Adam. Adam's status as a progenitor doesn't equate to actual godhood. In order to become a god in Eva's universe, one must possess both Fruits of Life and Wisdom. The angels born from Adam possess Life. Mankind possesses Wisdom.

He is however, an idealized version of Shinji. Someone who, to Shinji, is so awe-inspiring that he can't help but gain a complex from him.

I'd also like to argue that Kaworu's somewhat detached way of speaking doesn't come from the idea that he isn't human (there's a lot of debunking from the show's narrative) but due to his upbringing. On that end, Rei speaks in a similar pattern to Kaworu. Detached but not unsettling. Rei was heavily surveilled by Gendo and Kaworu was under the eyes of SEELE. Also, what about Kaworu was self-righteous? Kaworu never showed an inkling of conceit in the show's canon.

The way he connects with Shinji may appear as romantic, but to suggest a god-like character of his bg and role could conceptualize having a romantic relationship with a human he had planned to kill indrectily makes no sense within the story.

To reiterate: not a god. Also, 'planned to kill.' The angels merging with Adam weren't meant as a show of conceit at humanity/lilin. It's biological drive. There's nothing moral or immoral of it whatsoever. Kaworu actively questions the desire of returning to mother Adam, knowing this would annihilate humanity. I'd also like to add that there were several factors, and that Shinji wasn't the sole reason for Kaworu's qualms during his descent to Heaven's Door. Kaworu's comment about music has always stood out to me for years because he states it to be the 'highest' form of lilin culture. Implying there's other interests of his from people. Considering how he's so interested in Shinji's issues, it's very possible he has marked interest in the living condition.

Furthermore, if Kaworu did plan to kill Shinji from the jump, then why not use Unit-02 to easily dispose of Unit-01 rather than using the Evangelion as a distraction? Kaworu can fenagle with sync rates of an Evangelion, provided it has a non-dominant/shut off soul.

It was clear to the audience that he was not human and did not see thing from a human POV, but he also calls all humans Lilin, suggesting he sees Shinji as an other. Apparently Kaworu was even directly modeled after Jesus Christ.

Othering isn't about differentiation, it's about the contempt you have for those who aren't you. Kaworu calls Shinji Lilin...because he himself isn't human. That's all. He didn't see anything from a human POV...despite questioning the desire of merging with Adam.

The smoking gun for Kaworu's morality is here.

If Kaworu was romantically attracted to Shinji, it would mean he is an emotional sadist who finds broken people attractive, would be capable of falling in love with with a complete stranger within 24 hours of meeting them, and that he's capable of full human emotions. None of these add up given Kaworu's history and behaviour, which is why Kaworu's love feels more like an agape kind, as he likely doesn't understand love like a human would. His screentime is also so short that it's hard to fully understand him as a character.

I see this notion quite often and I notice a pattern each time: Kaworu's supposed lack of attraction is used to say that he 'manipulated' Shinji's mental state at the time. Or that he feigned emotion because emotions are a foreign concept because he's not human. But if Kaworu did love Shinji, it's because he's secretly selfish and gets his jollies off from Shinji's trauma. It's chiefly fueled by bad faith in either direction.

Emotions are a complex thing. You can't necessarily make a few behaviors The Standard and shun anything but. People process their feelings differently. Also, to tackle the emotions thing, I wrote a few observations of certain subtleties that debunks the long-held 'human' emotion notion.

[creativesplat]

for the character ask, how about Alcryst and Alfred?

right so this has been in my drafts for MONTHS so I decided I'd post it (I may not have done Alcryst, really sorry 😅)

sorry for taking so long to get back to you doodles!

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

oooh... I think Alfred would be amazing in an 1800s gothic horror book, maybe as the romantic interest. He and his wife Alear go to the Inn of the Blaiddyd family. He's on his deathbed with (insert romantic poet style wasting disease here (eg. consumption)), and as a last desperate attempt to heal him, Alear's sister Veyle has recommended to see a doctor who is treating the heir to the Inn, Dimitri. The doctor has no heart - literally - it was taken out by the one of the fell ones (eldtirch horrors) Bylee and Byleth, both identical twins, have lost their hearts, taken by the Immaculate One (eldritch Rhea, but she doesn't go by that name).

Anyway main points:

Dimitri's haunted (being treated for hallucinations and sickness of the mind, but he is actually for real haunted as well as mentally unwell)

This is because of the Blaiddyd curse, but let's not get into that.

Byleth and his sister, Bylee, came to treat Dimitri. Both came under the curse as a result, and attracted the Immaculate One.

So this would be book three of the series. (book one is Veyle and Alear escape the Fell Serpent (eldritch horror sombron)), book two is Dimitri and Bylee, they fall in love(?) they aren't sure and its never confirmed in book two, and she tells her brother Byleth about the haunted vibes she gets from the inn. Its about the two discovering the origin of the Blaiddyd curse and the Fell Star (eldritch horror that dwells in Bylee, it gets into a creepy what makes us human style thing) After a two year time skip in which we discover the handsome love interest that introduced Alear to the outside world in book one is deadly ill, and Veyle gets information on the Blaiddyd inn. A place which can heal loved ones, at a price...

duh duh duhhhh!!

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

life's been boring by RYMAN LEON

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

ADHD coded!

also we're both people of faith (he's one of the most religious characters in the game, and I'm a Christian.)

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

I have a lot... lets see...

Makes flower crowns for any and all reasons, one of them is to keep hands busy when hyperactive (eg fidget toy but flower crown version)

picky eater

insecure about his body (he talks to Marth about it in the bonds)

thick as mince. Like man is not a smart boi

hyperfixates on certain diets and exercise fads on loop. One month it was keto, the next it was about bodily flexibility (like the stay flexi guy), then he went vegan for health reasons, after that it was about meat (as raw as it could get, he got rather sick) all while going to the gym religiously.

he is an AWFUL cook

ADHD brain means he is NOT a very tidy guy

probably autistic, I mean look at his B support with Alear and tell me that man isn't

weighs less than Celiné. He isn't happy about it and tells her its because of his 'sleeper build' but he's actually just slim

Suffers with Chrones, chronic pain, as well as a slew of other genetic ailments. He did not win the genetic lottery

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?

💪🥰🥺🤣🏋️🌸🌻👟 Idk he probably uses those

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

F!Alear, because it's very sweet, and the character models are really fun to pair together because they look so different!

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter? ALCRYST ALL THE WAY like Alfred would be the best big brother to Alcryst it's not even funny how good that would be I just love it! MAKE THEM INTERACT! ITs so good!

23. Favorite picture of this character?

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

Sokka, in some ways, because he's funny and silly and a little insecure, but honestly Sokka is WAY smarter than Alfred.

[limeade-l3sbian]

there's an art installation in las vegas called "omegamart," and the premise of it is a parody of capitalism where the store uses a form of eldritch magic to harvest feelings from customers and manifest them into products that are paranatural, and often ineffective (if not actually dangerous) to use in the circumstances that brought on the human desires that manifested them to begin with.

one of the "products" is something called "gender fluid." trans visitors to the exhibit love it, and joke(?) that they wish it actually existed. afaik, trans people have worked at the exhibit. i have no way of knowing whether this item was a partially joking but partially sincere "haha wouldn't it be nice" inclusion made by a tra, or if it's a parody of how genderists and qu**r theorists are taking a completely irrational and capitalistic approach to the problem of "gender." parody is indistinguishable from some of their actual beliefs.

i know a tra would read this and refute it with "it's just a joke, you're so deranged in taking it seriously, etc.," but what's the joke here? they buy hormones, prosthetics, surgeries, voice coaching, classes to teach skills they associate with their "gender," and cosmetic procedures in the name of "gender," and perpetuate the notion that things like hobbies, clothes, and mannerisms are linked to "being a woman or a man," to the point where a whole ass man can buy certain clothes and have certain hobbies and be "closer to womanhood" in their eyes because they associate those clothes or hobbies with women. so how is "gender fluid" all that different?

it's idpol, through and through, trying to convince us that material reality comes second to the social constructs built around it, that claiming to be the opposite sex and wearing what you deem to be the "uniform" actually materially changes you (or at least society's perception of you) from being a member of one group to the other, and reaffirming that "gender" (a regressive concept that links sex, or at least sexed terms, to certain aesthetics, skills, interests, emotions, etc.) is a natural and concept that we can't be rid of.

.

[noneuclideanwhimsy]

i was told i could know more about g’ here….. 👉👈

Alright.

The being to whom I refer as ‘G’’ is my interpretation of the G-Man from the Half-Life games, a recurring character that takes the form of a human man in a blue suit with glowing eyes but is implied to be an extremely powerful otherworldly being of some kind, known for acting as a mysterious observer who occasionally intervenes by ‘hiring’ certain humans who pique his and his nebulous Employers’ interest and inserting them back into the story at different points in time and space, often keeping them in a sort of void outside of reality in a state of ‘stasis’ until their time comes. He is also my comfort character.

While his motives in the games are extremely unclear, sometimes helping the player, sometimes stopping their plans in their tracks, I interpret G’ as entirely benevolent, an entity far beyond human comprehension who nonetheless feels nothing but compassion and curiosity towards humanity and even grows to deeply and personally care about his employees in the human Resistance on his mission to push them towards defeating a massive, parasitic transdimensional empire known as the Combine that has taken to conquering worlds to assimilate their technology and resources to make up for the inability to innovate on their own.

I also lean into the eldritch (though I dislike the common negative connotations of that word) aspect of his characterization; my G’ is a fifth-dimensional being, belonging to a group known as the Overseers of our Worlds, the last remaining members of a race of immortal beings unbound from time and space that have existed longer than this universe, possibly longer than linear time itself, and work under a group of even more ancient beings called the Multiversal Agency who see it as their primary objective to ensure that all beings and civilizations in the Multiverse get to live peacefully without destroying one another, and to allow as many civilizations as possible to progress and discover on their own. Due to his vast five-dimensional nature, a three-dimensional universe physically cannot contain all of G’, so he exists in countless ‘aspects’ at once, scattered all across time and space. He is capable of bending reality to his will, but is limited by the fragility of three-dimensional reality; too much interference from him will literally break our world apart, so he tends to work through others in the form of his employees and only ever directly intervenes in minor ‘nudges’. The human form we see of G’ is little more than an illusion, his true self is formless and incomprehensible to humans, so he assumes the form of a vague human authority figure (his ‘G-Man’ moniker, not strictly canonical but originating from his model name in the game files, is actually an outdated slang term for a government agent) in order to not overwhelm the humans he interacts with, and his human disguise is actually shown to become less and less uncanny and more convincing as the story progresses, as though he has a genuine desire to understand humanity better and blend in with them.

My interpretation of G’ retains the cryptic appearance of the original, yet he does so in a slightly more dramatic and theatrical way, seeing his appearances in front of humans as an opportunity to show infinitely younger beings something More, something Greater, and wanting to leave an impression on them. He does not see himself as overtly superior to them, though he recognizes both his own power over them and his duty to guide them where they do not know what they are dealing with. He is very much so capable of love and compassion, though he is used to loving the worlds he watches over (and the few he himself has created) in a distant and all-encompassing way, his experiences with humanity have taught him individual closeness to members of a tightly knit group, some of whom he even comes to view as family. I associate him with space imagery not only because he is a cosmic being, but also because he is not unlike the mysteries of the universe to me: intimidating, almost frightening at first but gentle and fascinating once you come to know him. He has been my comfort character for over a year now, I see him as an imaginary friend of sorts who helps me overcome anxiety and existential fear as well as genuinely view the world around me in a more positive light.

I’m sorry for the super long explanation, he means a lot to me

[moontheoretist]

"And it is with that I highly recommend we begin shifting our focus to addressing the inevitable: extraterrestrial life. You have before you a copy of a statement made by Thor Odinson regarding the existence of, to be blunt, a shit-ton of planets and beings far beyond our little patch of space." The UN delegates didn't even blink at the language, now used to Tony's way of speaking. "I realize this is far easier said than done and there is a lot of history and bad blood to account for; however, we have got to get ourselves together and we need to do it soon. The next encounter may not end so well." A picture of the symbiote dragon was now projected in high-definition for all to see. "So you do believe there are more to come?" Asked the Nigerian delegate. "Yes, ma'am. I'm not saying all close encounters will necessarily be hostile—honestly, we should craft our policy with an eye towards non-aggression and open trade. But in this case? We were damn lucky this eldritch abomination was weakened from a previous battle and a 1000 year nap. It would be in our best interest not to wait around and hope that my team can handle the next one with zero casualties. We're amazing, but we're also a small group and there are billions of people on this planet. The time is now. The public is now aware that magic exists—that the supernatural exists—that there are extraordinary individuals among them. At this point aliens won't even be much of a stretch and shouldn't cause mass panic. But we must be smart about it." "You sound as if you have a plan?" India's delegate said. "I always have multiple plans and a love of talking. Please direct your attention to page 56. We have three large issues to tackle: adapting the UN's scope and function in addressing supernatural and extraterrestrial issues, updating our existing infrastructure to support evacuation and emergency measures planet-wide, and finally, a means of increasing access to information and resources for all peoples. If that means that certain States provide reparations for certain past activities then you'll just have to deal with that discomfort-" "Dr. Stark, you are not suggesting we resort to socialism-!" Tony sighed and pointedly clicked back to the slide showing Big Mother in all her glory. "Okay, look, this beast from Deep Space was two steps away from infecting the entire planet and sucking our brains out through our ears. Do you think she gave a flying fuck about our economic systems while tearing through the countryside? We are only as strong as the weakest among us and there are billions of human beings suffering from food insecurity and a whole host of issues—not through their own doing, mind you. What do you think will happen if hostiles gain a foothold in one of those regions? If our continued survival as a species ultimately comes down to a redistribution of wealth and workers controlling the means of production then you'll just have to get over yourselves. I, myself, prefer living. But, hey. Whenever E.T. decides that humanity is better off eradicated, I'm sure your family will be thrilled that you fought for the continued existence of an intangible stock portfolio." The American (and several other) delegates glared at him while a few had to discreetly duck their heads or take a sip from their glasses of water. "What we've been doing won't work, Ladies and Gentlemen. The average human being is comparatively short-lived, easily killed, and our technology? It is laughable. And this is coming from me. This thing flew around the cosmos with nothing but the wings on its back for eons; meanwhile, on the same scale we've barely figured out indoor plumbing. You guys wanted my honest assessment so I'm giving it—as we are right now? We are fucked. Some of our honored States have a vested interest in the status quo. I get that; to be honest I'm certain you know better than I what system will work best for your particular communities. I'm talking about the *global scale*. On that level the mess we've got is not going to fly any longer. If the next threat came tomorrow with a dedicated force our current distribution of resources prevents a timely and effective response. Our only saving grace right now is Asgard. Thor Odinson has reported that the King has a duty to see to the protection of the Nine Realms, of which we do fall into. But he's also admitted Asgard hasn't bothered with our little ball of mud in a millennium. If you want to put all your eggs in that basket I cannot stop you. But I'm not going to help you keep your head in the sand and I'm certainly not going to put my family's safety on something so fickle. You have families of your own—are you really going to risk their lives on a race of beings who have little to no regard for us? Are you?" Tony pointedly looked around the chamber. When he was satisfied, he clicked back to his previous place. "I've never been the type to roll over and give up easy so, again, these are my recommendations. You asked. Take them or leave them, but I really suggest you take them."

Have Time — Will Travel by flower-of-el (NibelungVelocity)

I seriously wish I could show anybody who screams "aack socialism! take that away" a huge cosmic dragon to scare them into shutting up.

[damientheionandroid]

Damien's 20 Favorite Pokémon

While I really love Legendary Pokémon (with one of them being in my Top 5), Mythicals are the ones that I have a hard time getting attached to. The fact that they are event exclusive is a glaring issue, but there's also the fact that in later games, they're just offered to you without much fanfare (looking at you, Zeraora!).

Still, I do appreciate how these mythical marvels have a great deal of lore attached to them (with a few exceptions, like Zeraora!). And to find the one that is my personal favorite, we have to move past the darkness...

...And venture into PITCH BLACK!

6. Darkrai

Get it? Cos it's called The "Pitch Black" Pokémon?

...

Terrible pun aside, Darkrai is one of the coolest Pokémon designs I've seen in years and it doesn't take a genius to see why (a black shadowy figure with spikes around its neck, forming a lower jaw? HECK YEAH!).

I'm also enamored with its lore: while Darkrai is able to induce nightmares in people, it is actually a self-defense mechanism instead of an intentional act of malice. Due to this tragic happenstance, The Pitch Black Entity isolated itself on New Moon Island and away from any human contact, never to harm them again.

The effects of Darkrai's nightmares are seen when you visit Captain Eldritch (I see what you did there, GameFreak!) in Canalave City: his son happens to be suffering from unending nightmares and the only way to cure it is to head to Full Moon Island and get the Lunar Wing from Cresselia.

Speaking of Cresselia, The Lunar Princess serves as the antithesis of the Prince of Nightmares: Cresselia is pure Psychic, while Darkrai is pure Dark; Cresselia brings sweet dreams, while Darkrai causes nightmares; and Cresselia is a Legendary while Darkrai is a Mythical. Yet both are a reflection on how dreams and nightmares are supernatural forces that we cannot control.

But at least Cresselia wasn't royally screwed by GameFreak, both in the lore AND in the competitive meta.

Yep, I'm going there! But first, let us look at some good things about Darkrai.

Darkrai has stats indicative of a glass cannon just like the previous Pokémon on this list, Kartana; the difference being it is a Special Attacker instead of a Physical one. 125 Base Speed means that Darkrai is among the top 5 fastest Pokémon in the Overused tier, while its 135 Base Special Attack means that its STAB and coverage moves hit like a truck!

There's not much to say about a Mono Dark typing other than how you're able to switch into a Psychic type attack with impunity. However, Darkrai's signature Ability is pretty interesting: Bad Dreams deals 1/8th of the opponents max HP when they're Asleep. This synergizes very well with Darkrai's Signature Move: Dark Void.

Dark Void puts itself above other Sleep-inducing moves by not only having a decent 80% accuracy as well as not being hampered by the likes of Grass Types, Safety Goggles, and the newly buffed Overcoat unlike Spore and Sleep Powder; Dark Void also puts ALL targets to sleep in Multi Battles! This is INSANE, and that's not even getting into Darkrai's high Speed stat putting its opponents to sleep BEFORE they have a chance to attack!

The bottom line is that Dark Void combined with Bad Dreams makes Darkrai a very potent threat and is a must have on your team...

...Until Generation 7 was released.

Yep, I know this is a long time coming but after the work of a "certain" Gen 2 Pokémon, Dark Void now outright SUCKS!!!

Its accuracy was dropped from a decent 80% to an embarrassing 50%, turning every chance to put the target to sleep into a coin flip! In fact, Darkrai decided to use Hypnosis instead, it sucked so bad!

Nevertheless, Darkrai is still my favorite Mythical Pokémon and everything I love about the Pitch Black is still there: from its ethereal design to its tragic circumstances. If GameFreak ever did an event where ALL Mythicals can be caught in the post game, you'll bet I'll be saving my Dusk Balls for this Prince of Nightmares.

And if there is any comfort: Darkrai is still going strong in OU while Cresselia is stuck in NUBL. Just goes to show that in darkness, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.

[outismm]

giggling seeing your tags!!! oh no, the lovely Pat Butcher has caught your eye, has he? 🙈💖 AND the Toymaker too!!! tell me what you love about them, i'm all ears 🥰💖

Star. Star what have you done. Star you've given me an excuse to yell about them now, what have you DONE KJASDKASJ no but <3 oh this is gonna get so long. I am being fueled entirely by Autism and Beginning-of-Winter-Term-Enthusiasm. Star, my beloved moot, this is going to be a thesis. I am so very sorry AKDSJSAKDJASKD

GUH. THE TOYMAKER. AH,,,, <- said while sweating profusely backed into a corner If I had to break it down into understandable words and not 'GKRJGRJG BITE BITE CHEW CHEW GNAW' :

The archetype of 'Very Silly Very Eldritch Man' is perhaps my favourite of all time, so this was inevitable. Like :

THIS!! THIS!! THIS IS THE KINDA STUFF THAT DRIVES ME ABSOLUTELY GONZO AMNDSAMND.

As a character, he falls into a category just adjacent to fae [magic-y, lots of eldritch traits that you only notice out of the corner of your eye, will make you to play silly games for your soul, Odd and Unusual In Nature] which is just. Mwah. my most favouritest of vibes for any character to have. My brain is in shambles.

Toymaker hot, no further notes there.

MANDMAND NO NO BUT. The expressiveness and whimsy that NPH puts into his performance as The Toymkaer makes my head go all spinny <3. Don't even get me started on his hands while he shuffles the cards, I'll collapse like a victorian dying of consumption.

Keep staring at me with those big sparkly blue eyes Magic Man and I will allow you to turn me into a kazoo :)

THE LORE IS SO VERY CRUNCH CAUSE LIKE - ‘entity born, alone, outside the universe itself’ is already such a fun concept, there’s so much to work with there even in the Canon only gently touches on it - But also,, the way he clings to humanity? The way he finds these impermanent little creatures and their games so fascinating? The parallels that creates w/ The Doctor? <- outis is about to go on a tangent

Like <3 that was always one of my favourite things about DW, even as a kid, and specifically The Doctor?

Like The Doctor’s gonna outlast humanity no matter what, that’s inevitable with what they are, but that isn’t the point, and that doesn’t change the interest/adoration/love that they've got for Humanity now :)

Even after they’re all gone, The Doctor’s always gonna have their hope, and The Toymaker’s always gonna have their games :) They both have a certain love for humanity, even if it’s in different ways, and with very, very different motivations attached. <- I don’t know if this makes sense. It is almost 1 am. Runs away like an animal crossing villager. Immortal Beings who find a way to love the Mortal will always make my heart go soupy.

TLDR. he is so particularly silly and tragic in a way that makes my brain. Go goopy. Also he must be so very touch starved and I want him to cling to me like a baby sloth :)

OH GOD AND I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED ON PAT-

THIS FUCKING GUY >:( how could this happen to me. How can I explain this to anyone. <- the instant I told a few of my friends that I had a crush on a BBC Ghosts character, they went 'oh yeah we thought you'd like Pat' despite me never mentioning his name to anyone. So clearly this was pre-destined KJASDKSADJ

NO BUT <333 AAAAA PATRICK BUTCHER MY LOVE. Where do I even begin with this wonderful wonderful man.

He gave a child a bow and arrow and didn’t see how that’d go wrong. He has the sweetest smile. He misses being able to eat food so much. His voice reaches a pitch that could rival a dog-whistle when he’s angry. He’s the shortest of the cast. He just wanted to say hello. When he was dying and in pain, he made himself stay calm and happy because even worse than dying was the idea of scaring the kids. He’s even autistic.

I have to believe that this man was bred in a lab in Yorkshire to make my brain turn inside out, in some sort of long-term assassination attempt. He calls his wife petal for heavensakes, there was never a hope of me not falling madly in love. that entire flashback scene had me making goosenoises. he is such a delight. Pat do you want a little kiss on your moustache. Pat we could get ghost married. Hey where are you going-

[I’m also realizing now that to anyone who hasn’t experienced Pat as a character, I’m sure this section must look like me going ‘hnrhgrngn I want him so bad’, only to open up my hand to reveal a softboiled egg. but please know that this is also what it feels like on my end MNASDMSNADMN.] TLDR : He's a soft-hearted dad from Yorkshire, what more could you want? Look at that sweet face :)

GHOU I have <3 been rambling for so very long. Thank you for giving me an excuse to yell about my sillies :) it has improved my eveningmorning so very much

[exist101]

Well buckle up this is going to get silly. So my theory is that the cult is trying to make everyone leave the town so they can take over for more cult shenenagins by turning people into slashers/monsters by putting them in the same room with an Eldritch style Horror and that Kevin's next are next. And that Skids dad is stuck in the mannequin but we already know this. Keep reading because I start spiraling just as badly as Kevin.

Okay so I'm going to start with Dexter because he's so interesting

This is Dexter Erotoph, he kills rats, bats, cats, anything fast! Introduced in Unwelcome Guests, he's an exterminator who gets called by Lila (Skid's mom) to kill a rat, not knowing it's a demon named Moloch who proceeds to possess him, then Skid and Pump trick Moloch into snapping his neck, sadly killing Dexter in the process. But we do see him again in Deadly Smiles, where he's inside a doll known as Happy Fella, that is apparently a trap for ghosts and makes them violent. So basically Make-Your-Own-Chucky dolls, and for the rest of the episode Happy Fella attempts to run away from Skid and Pump who own the doll Dexter is in. It's only until the very end that he gets violent at Skid and Pump, while he tries to kill other things. There is a qr code where we see Dexter spiraling

There is evidence that Dexter has already been dealing with violent urges, as he repeatedly uses the phrase "fulfill my needs" when talking about violence, even when he's human. There is another character who is associated with Dexter that also is incredibly violent, Bob Velseb, who we'll get to in a second. These are either because he's an exterminator or why he became one in the first place, however it's clear he is associated with the cult in some way too, with the eye on his backpack to certain ways he speaks with callbacks too the way Mr. Clown speaks. All of this is evidence towards the cult wanting to create slashers/monsters, with Dexter, a character who needs to kill things and heavily associated with both the cult and a Michael Myers-esque killer, to the Happy Fella dolls that make ghosts violent and angry, even to their loved ones. And don't worry about Dexter, he (or Moloch in his body at the least) is being nursed by someone, most likely Patty as she was holding the clipboard of his tests we see from another code.

Moving on to Bob Velseb, said Michael Myers-esque killer heavily associated with Dexter.

We know he's a part of the cult, or at the least knows it, because in the Newgrounds ending we see Patty tell the cops Jack and John about this weird medallion (which we see a similar one on a cultist) attached to his heart, where he gets up a final time and the cops shoot him some more. This is after he'd been run over and shot multiple times before and just kept on getting up (hence why I say he's like Michael Myers, he also has a mask too it's just not pictured right now) which suggests the medallions may give immortality but likely not quick healing (so rip to the cultist who set Johns house on fire) Also, worth mentioning, right before he "dies" the pupils of his eyes turn blue just like how Pumps do whenever he's around a supernatural entity, just as he had ever since he first met The Eyes of the Universe, an Eldritch Horror who befriends and cares for Skid and Pump, which is more evidence for my theory.

Moving on yet again (I really don't have much to say about Bob. He exists and I don't care other than his association with Dexter) this is Mr Clown, who was probably the leader if not very high up in the ranks of the cult.

He is where we first here the cults saying, "We will take All that is Everything, and Everything will give us more than is All." Which, as far as I can tell, has two meanings. We will talk more about the second one in a little bit. Right now I want to talk about the evidence for my theory that the cult wants to take over the town and spread to more places. The phrase itself directly states they will take everything (the town) and spread to other places (the county? state? WORLD???)

Also this picture is worth mentioning simply because we have so much here

We have Lila and Jaune as kids, Bob before he went and became a cannibal, the grey haired guy is likely Mr Clown (Sr Pelo said "What a fuuny guy!" on twitter and we know it's not Mr Wonder) There's a kid who looks similar to Pump and a kid that looks similar to Ross, that last kid may be Frank which means something happened to him and there's a person hiding right there.

Now let's talk about what the second meaning of the phrase is and what I think the cult is planning. There are pictures of Skid with the phrase "You Are Everything" that are likely from his dad, who we know for a fact was a part of the cult. Maybe I'm overthinking (yes) but what if it's a warning that Skid is Everything? And if Skid is Everything, it would mean Pump is All as they are an inseperable duo. So the cults plan then would be "We'll take the pumpkin kid and the skeleton kid will go after and then we'll have who we really need" which also makes sense because while people talk about Pump being able to see supernatural entities they don't talk nearly enough that Skid is somehow more protected from them, Pump is always closest to danger. This likely has something to do with Skids dad being a part of the cult.

Speaking of Skids dad, he's dead and his ghost is stuck inside the mannequin. We all know this and everyone and their mother has made this theory.

Who I think is the next victim of the cult? I don't mean who's the next villain, but rather who it is we're going to see go crazy in real time? It's Kevin. We see he's already starting to go a bit crazy, but that's because he works at a candy store and has to deal with Skid and Pumps tendency to bring trouble to his work (the eldritch horror, the sugar from the candy dealer, the haunted doll, the cannibal) and of course Karens. Not to mention his probably close friend (in some backgrounds we see Kevin x Streber or K x S) Streber got at the least his arm eaten at the most was killed by Bob. Not to mention

This was taken from Sr Pelos doodle dump, which we know has bits of lore. So yeah Kevin's likely going to lose it.

Anyway that's all I could think of right now. Hope you enjoyed my bullshit.

[fandom-hoarder]

What's the issue with Lucifer being a virgin? His arc overall sucks, but it makes sense to me that he'd never have had sex because he looks down on humans, sees it as gross and beneath him.

I want to preface this with: this is just my opinion on a solely canon reading of virgin Lucifer. Idc about fanon. A lot of fanfiction writers are way better than late season spn writers were at exploring the interesting aspects of many characters and concepts like this.

But if, along with everything else absolutely ridiculous going on in s12, we're supposed to believe Lucifer cares enough about the human concept of virginity to care about punching his v-card? It's too much. Lucifer's only goal in having sex with a human woman was making a powerful child he could use.

However, one more note before I get into it: after rewatching LOTUS and the continued discussion in the notes of yesterday's post, I'm not entirely certain Lucifer actually did call himself a virgin. I'll have to do an actual s12 rewatch to confirm, so this reply is based on the hypothetical that virgin Lucifer is s12 canon. Update: it was explicitly said in 13x22

[CW: discussion of sex in general, issues of consent including rape, the cage]

My main issues with virgin!Lucifer:

1. The concept of virginity.

2. Lucifer raping Sam.

3. It's pointless.

(Further detail under the cut)

IRL, virginity is a silly social construct with way too much weight given to it and arbitrary/homophobic (e.g.: "only p in v penetration counts") or erroneous (e.g.: "broken hymen") definition. It's often used as a marker of innocence or purity; a lack of worldly knowledge.

Lucifer, while perhaps never before having the desire or opportunity to have physical sex while inside a vessel, still has carnal knowledge. Using actual bible canon to fill in the obvious here: Lucifer spied on the Garden of Eden before Adam and Eve ate the Fruit of Knowledge and learned shame--so he's seen sex, at the very least. And he was not like some guileless child exposed to adult sexuality without understanding-- he was one of God's first angels, and he was there to plot.

He knows how sex works and uses lust and desire to manipulate people. He has simulated sex in Hell, at the very least -- raping Sam. Calling a rapist a virgin just cuz he hasn't stuck his physical dick in a physical vagina is just. Ridiculous.

And in spn, the concept of virginity for an angel is even more ridiculous to me. Imagine stuffing a millenia-old cosmic being, of unknowable power and form, into a tiny human meatsuit and holding that amalgamation to the human standards of sexuality and virginity. When not only Lucifer, but MOST angels, see sex and other human activity as beneath them?? Like I said in my prev tags, it's an eldritch comedy!

When not in a vessel, angels haven't been shown to have a sex drive, or interest in romantic or sexual love. Most angels IN vessels don't seem to, either. (Obvs there are outliers, especially after the s8 Fall, hence the "most".)

Sure, you can say Lucifer is technically a virgin -- but then so are all angels. Canonically they're "junkless," so if someone WERE to stick to the idea that one must have sexual organs to have sex, no angel can. Are we just supposed to count their vessel as their physical body? It's not even theirs.

IIRC most angels refer to their vessel as their vessel, detached from their self. They're just borrowing it. They have to ask for consent. This act of penetrating a human body with their grace is already used as a metaphor for sex all over canon.

But if, further, we're to believe virginity can be a thing that actually applies to angels -- when exactly does it count? If an angel in a vessel sticks their fingers or other object into their vessel's or someone else's hole of choice, does that not count because it's not p in v? Does it count if the physical vessel orgasms, even without p in v? It's a question adjacent to one of my main points about the concept of virginity in the first place-- the parameters of what "counts" are arbitrary and homophobic.

And then we have Sam being raped in the cage! With Hallucifer, some argument has been made that it was just euphemistic taunting or something. Nevermind how unrealistic it would be for the actual Devil to torture Sam for over a century in Hell and NOT include sexual torture. However, I'm unable to read later Sam/Lucifer interactions as anything other than referring to actual rape in the cage, and therefore canonizing it even more than Hallucifer did.

So what actually is the point-- after so much conniving manipulation and taunting of sexual assault-- of claiming Lucifer is a virgin, and being serious about it? Is it shaky scaffolding for a redemption arc? Is it just another crass throwaway joke? Is it poorly done commentary on the societal assignment of purity to virginity?

In the end, to me personally, the idea of canon virgin!Lucifer squicks me out and fills me with Samgirl rage.

[just-a-creep-babe]

I'm back?? Creeps with a really go with the flow, devil-may-care, Not afraid of death, Chill SO? [EX: *meets creeps* Wow, okay, this is my life now I guess. || Same stuff as always! *helps hide body* || You wanna fly into the Bermuda triangle and live to stream it? Heck yeah, she'll bring spicy sour patch kids. || Don't worry! I'm still in shock! Can't feel a thing! || '*does something stupid* we survived? Brilliant. Love it when that happens. ] Thanks!♡

~Requests are closed but commissions are open~

Masterlist: x

Slenderman

Jfc—why?

He’s already worried about litcherally everyone else in the mansion, now you too?

He is Quite Concerned™️

Lowkey more concerned for you over the others but that’s a given tbh

Honestly questions how tf you’ve manage to make it this far without dying

He makes it his personal mission to keep you safe at all costs—no matter what

So on the bright side, you sort of inherit this ancient eldritch being as a personal bodyguard!

But on the not-so bright side, said being just doesn’t let ya have any fun around here >:/

Will physically restrain you from doing something stupid so you don’t get caught up in anything dangerous

Starts considering giving you a curfew or smthg because even he can’t keep up with the stuff you get pulled into

But he respects you too much for that, ofc, so he just begrudgingly accepts that you’ll keep doing you—no matter how irresponsible or dangerous it might be :”)

Still loves you despite the heart attacks you nearly put him through every other day :)

Jeff the Killer

This 👏mans 👏will 👏love 👏you 👏forever 👏

At first, admittedly, he’s a teensy bit put off by your nonchalance because how can someone actually be that laid back all the time??

But once he adjusts to it & realizes that you aren’t, in fact, faking it for whatever reason, he’ll be completely & utterly enamored with you

Like,, he can do a bunch of stupid shit & drag you along into it & you won’t freak out??

Sign 👏him 👏up 👏

Loves not having to worry about you sanity tbh—there’s no need to hide all the dangerous crap he does because he knows you won’t worry ^^

And homeboy most definitely will take advantage of your go-with-the-flow nature

He’s got a taste for danger & doing stupid shit—how could he not bring you along with him?

If/when y’all get caught & put in trouble tho, he’ll take the blame so that you don’t suffer for something that was most likely his idea

Jeff? Doing the right thing? It may be more likely than you think 🤔

It still sometimes unnerves him just how chill you are with everything, but hey, he can’t let you outdo him in badass-ness, so he’s guaranteed to incite plenty of chaos to prove himself; it’s bound to be an exciting time uwu

BEN Drowned

Oh he is sO down

One of the perks of being dead? He probably can’t die again

So there are absolutely no limits to the insane shenanigans he’s willing to pull off

The fact that you’re just as down to clown makes thing so much better

It gets to the point where someone constantly needs to keep an eye on the both of you so you don’t accidentally end up dying

Cause BEN (and bless his soggy soul) as much as he loves you, tends to forget how fragile human beings can be

So it’s up to the others to make sure your lack of self-preservation doesn’t get you killed

But your fearlessness & nonchalance is like a breath of fresh air!

Things can get a teensy bit boring when you’re immortal, so he’s more than happy to have a badass s/o by his side who’s down for pretty much anything uwu

Y’all get into a bunch of stupid, dangerous & probably illegal shit—but he wouldn’t want it any other way 😘

Eyeless Jack

Similar to Slendaddy, this mans is Concerned™️

He will constantly check you over to see if you need to get patched up because he knows you’re a danger magnet

But at the same time, he doesn’t wanna be too overbearing

Like he definitely has this live & let live mentally (prolly in part due to his diet) so he‘ll try not to bring up too often how nervous he is about your safety & well-being

You’ve accepted him as he is, part demon and all, so he feels like he owes you the same

Even if it does scare the shit out of him because my god what have you gotten yourself into this time??

He’s kinda like a worried mom tbh—he’ll pack you up a lunch & send you off with a “be safe, don’t do anything dangerous, say no to drugs,” and stuff, even despite knowing you probably won’t listen

Homeboy just wants you to grow & experience the world for yourself :”)

Still, he’ll ask the others to keep an eye out for you & to not put you in too much danger

And he’ll totally sometimes follow you from the shadows just to make sure you’re staying safe skdjsjdlsjl

He’s a protective demon boi, what can I say? :)

Masky

He’s,,,, pretty impressed actually

Thinks your nonchalant attitude is kinda badass

Of course he still gets worried, but he’s also prone to forgetting how fragile most people are

His pain tolerance is pretty dang high, so he doesn’t always realize certain things can hurt normal people. Badly

He’ll feel super bad if you get injured with him, but at least homeboy will try to make it up by giving you plenty of sweets & cuddles uwu

He might try to give you a stern talking-to so that you’re more careful, but he knows it won’t stop you from being you

Still, overall, he thinks it’s pretty sweet that you’re down for, like, anything

Will probably wanna take you with him for jobs sometimes—just cause he can & it probably won’t traumatize you too bad :>

Just don’t tell slender

Thinks his bold little s/o is damn cool & lowkey brags abt you all the time uwu

Hoodie

He thinks it’s pretty funny lmfaoo

Is torn between being worried & wanting you safe while also desperately wanting to just be like “fuck it” and do a bunch of stupid shit with you :”)

Will probably take advantage of how you don’t worry much to tag you along in his shenanigans

But at least he’ll make your safety & comfort his utmost top priority uwu

Honestly, he admires how chill you are with shit that’s pretty traumatizing—it’s almost funny that you’re just as brave as he is, considering his line of work and all

It’s,, kinda intriguing to him; homeboy will maybe wanna psychoanalyze you a lil 👀👉👈

You’re just so interesting, he can’t help but be a smidge fascinated 👁👄👁

Really wants to be able to make some good, wild memories with you <3

He’s honestly the perfect balance of protective & adventurous at the same time

Just wants to please his little s/o and keep them safe & happy while fulfilling their need for wild shenanigans :>

Ticci Toby

Oh boy

He is the same

Together, y’all are chaotic af

The creeps know not to leave you unsupervised because shit will go down

The utmost chaotic duo in need of constant watching over & patching up ngl 😅

Seriously, the others are damn near always worried about babysitting you two because you’re both danger magnets

And it doesn’t help that Toby has no concept of danger and/or pain

He’ll try to be super sympathetic if/when you do get injured, but poor boy will be clueless af as to how to help

So more often than not, he’ll end up using himself as a human shield to protect you from danger to make up for it

Either way, y’all get into so much shit, it’s unbelievable

Kinda perfect together but like,, in the worst of ways lmfaooo

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

(Thought about this when reading an old Ask about the accusations of Cassie being a Mary Sue)

You know, for someone who does get a lot of those Mary/Gary Stu tropes, Tobias really doesn’t benefit from any of them like a typical Stu does. At the end of it all, he’s a complete recluse, even from his own humanity, had to watch the one he loved more than anything die in front of him with no way to stop it(thanks, Erick), never really reconnected with his mom even though he got a “long lost parent revealed” thing, and the only link he has to his father’s side of his family/guy he bonded with the most besides Rachel ends up being assimilated by some eldritch abomination.

Dude had all the makings of a Gary Stu and got none of the payoffs/benefits.

My feelings on the term “Mary Sue” remain extremely complicated, and will probably continue to evolve.  First and foremost: it does get weaponized against female characters, especially female sci-fi characters, especially female sci-fi characters of color, ESPECIALLY fat and/or gender nonconforming female sci-fi characters of color.  That’s almost certainly part of the reason Cassie appears in several TV Tropes articles that indicate she’s not competent enough (the Scrappy, the Wesley, etc.) and in several TV Tropes articles that suggest she’s too competent (Mary Sue, Author Stand-In, Karma Houdini, etc).  How dare she drive the story world, how dare she accomplish plot things, how dare she date Jake, how dare she dump Jake, how dare she.

Second: I think that the term remains useful to the extent that it can be used to verbalize a critique of certain pieces of writing.  It seems to be a response to two (often related) problems.  The first are stories where the plot problems are a little too well-matched to the character’s skills, creating a world with no tension because the character never has to struggle or come under threat (e.g. We are Legion, We are Bob).  The second is a story with only one real character and a bunch of undeveloped side pieces who exist to respond to that character without really showing human motivation (e.g. I Am Number Four).  These critiques should remain and should continue to shape the way we talk about SF, because well-rounded characters make for good stories.

Third: there’s an interesting just-world hypothesis built into a lot of the way fans, especially fans of American SF, talk about endings.  I don’t want to single yours out as the only instance because you’re making a good point about how Tobias would probably be described as a Mary Sue if Tobias was female, but you mention the idea of “payoffs” in a way that suggests a good character should get rewarded and a bad one punished.  And while the overwhelming majority of Hollywood stories follow that pattern, I don’t know that Animorphs has ever tried to do so.  Villains get rewarded, heroes get punished, and characters reveal they’re none of the above all the dang time in that series.  Thus I don’t know that Tobias’s sad ending is necessarily a point against him being a Mary Sue, nor have I ever given any credence to the argument that Cassie’s happy(ish) ending is a point in favor of her being one.  Animorphs doesn’t really work that way, and the endings argument doesn’t quite apply.

Fourth: the way Animorphs avoids having any Mary Sues (in my opinion) is simply through having the rotating narration.  If Marco thinks that Rachel is strong and brave, but Ax thinks that Rachel is reckless and bloodthirsty, there isn’t a single “right” opinion to be found.  Marco is right sometimes and wrong at other times, and so is Ax and so is Rachel.  Simply writing any part of I Am Number Four from Mark’s or Sarah’s point of view would force the audience (and the author, if I’m being cynical) to adopt a more well-rounded view of the protagonist John and also a more well-rounded view of Mark and Sarah.  Yes, the whole point of We are Legion, We are Bob is that there’s one character replicated hundreds of times over, but fleshing out Dr. Landers or one of the Brazilian pilots enough to get their thoughts on the situation would go a long way toward improving the book.

[scarletarosa]

The Outer Gods

Sometimes, what many deem to be merely fiction is actually embedded in truth. There have been times when authors (and other creators) have written about seemingly fictional deities, but unbeknownst to them, these very real gods had actually played a role in their writings. This is what had occurred for the gifted author, H.P. Lovecraft, who had been tormented throughout his life by many traumatic occurrences, and even had strange nightmares of eldritch deities. From these deities who came and spoke to him, he was inspired to write horror stories, not knowing that these maddening visions were actually real. The Outer Gods are only some of the deities who have made themselves known to humans by being placed into their books or other forms of work that many would think only serve as entertainment; but the truth goes far deeper than that. But unlike the stories, the Outer Gods are not evil, though many of them can be very cruel and dangerous. Remember that these deities are far removed from the way of thinking that we possess; they are far more vast than us in every possible way.  

Many Outer Gods also do not possess any emotions, as they have no need for them. They care not for life for life’s own sake, they only care for spiritual evolution. Any being who does not spiritually evolve (which is gained through a lifetime of pain, effort, and rebirth) is deemed as pathetic to the Outer Gods and unworthy of existence. Therefore, their view of life is completely different from how a typical human may view life, since us saying “all life is sacred” is simply laughable to these ancient deities. They are also usually neutral in morality; they care not for those who serve no higher purpose and feel nothing when they destroy them, yet they care for existence overall since they seek to have it evolve. For them, it does not matter how many insignificant humans they must kill in order to bring creation to the point where it needs to be. Though if they do find a rare human who is capable of evolving to the point of usefulness for creation’s development, they approach them and put the human through even more suffering, so that the person can evolve even further in strength and wisdom.  

Overall, the Outer Gods are elder deities dwelling within the Void who are incomprehensible in every single way. Many of them are larger than every planet combined (though they can shrink themselves when interacting on Earth), and they have existed for many eternities. Despite many of these gods being cold and harsh, they are extremely beneficial to all existence and understand the purpose of creation better than most other beings. Their usual lack of emotion simply allows them to perform their divine tasks more efficiently and to eradicate unnecessary things without being held back by sympathy.  

It is important to remember that the Outer Gods are very different from the gods who watch over humanity and other civilizations. Even though the gods we know of are very complicated, the Outer Gods are even moreso, and even greater in power as well. They are not meant to be worked with as how we work with our pantheon deities; the Outer Gods choose who they go to, not vice versa. They can still be respected, but speaking to them and worshipping them must be done by someone who is not at all new to working with deities and does not have psychosis. The Outer Gods must be treated with great respect, but remember that by interacting with them, you are allowing yourself to become highly vulnerable to losing your mental stability. They do not cause madness intentionally (usually), but this happens as a natural cause of being around their vast, unknowable essence. Even their appearances alone can cause madness in those who have sensitive minds.  

It is also important to remember that no amount of studying these deities will allow a person to understand even a portion of what they are truly like. It would even take the effort of a thousand people for an entire lifetime just to document what these deities do in one day of theirs. Thus, they are utterly incomprehensible to us, as our minds are nowhere near being as vast as their minds are. So one should not make assumptions about any of these gods. They also have no interest in being overlords of this planet, as many may believe due to fictitious stories; these elder gods only wish to see this planet evolve and become full of highly intelligent, spiritual beings who seek Illumination. And if the majority of people on a planet turn this down, then the elder gods usually seek for the population’s annihilation, since it no longer serves a higher purpose. As such, these gods seek people who willingly undergo the sufferings of their lives, refusing to give up or wallow in self-pity. Yet these courageous few must also be ones who love truth absolutely, seek the truth of the cosmos, and seek higher spirituality, so that they may devote their life to it.

If you choose to attempt at attracting the attention of these elder deities or just to worship them, do so with great caution and make certain that it is something you are truly prepared for. Be very respectful towards them and do not act arrogantly since they do not hesitate to severely punish or even kill people who irritate them. If you manage to have the honour of working with one or speaking to these gods, there is an immense amount of knowledge that you can learn from them, which allows the worthy to reach their highest potential. 

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #142: Ishtar

Today on Fate and Phantasms, we’re making Best Goddess and, according to @hasishtardoneanythingwrong, a servant who has done absolutely nothing very little wrong, Ishtar! 

In this build, Ishtar is a Divine Soul Sorcerer to balance her blasting abilities with her divine nature and a Zeal Cleric to push her explosive capabilities and godhood to the max.

Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: The second part of the oldest bromance in human history.

Race and Background

Unfortunately WotC hasn’t figured out how to balance literal god PCs yet, but since Ishtar is a demiservant we can still technically call her a Protector Aasimar, giving her +1 Wisdom, +2 Charisma, Darkvision, Celestial Resistance to radiant and necrotic damage, Healing Hands to heal some hands, and the Light cantrip.

Since she protects Uruk in her own special way, we’ll call her a Goddess Alliance Anarch. This gives you Animal Handling and Religion proficiencies, as well as some bonus spells as you level up!

Ability Scores

As the goddess of love and also blowing up mountains, your Charisma needs to be as high as possible. Follow that up with Dexterity, you can literally fly, that’s pretty fast. After that will be Constitution, you can take a lot of abuse, especially if it’s coming from the writers. Your Wisdom has to be next so we can multiclass, keep that in mind if you’re rolling. Your Strength isn’t amazing, but it’s not like you’re using it anyway. Finally, dump Intelligence. Not gonna dwell on that one, let’s just move on.

Class Levels

1. Sorcerer 1: Honestly I think “Divine Soul” is kinda selling yourself short, but we’ll work in the framework we’re given. You can cast Spells now, including your Divine Magic from the cleric spell list, using your Charisma. You’re also Favored by the Gods, giving you the option of adding 2d4 to a failed save or attack roll once per short rest.

For cantrips you get Thunderclap and True Strike for offensive options (I mean you do aim. Even if your target’s a mountain, aiming is important.) You also get Minor Illusion and Friends to manipulate people into doing what you want.  Finally, your stand against the Three Goddess Alliance grants you the cantrips Fire Bolt and Produce Flame to make the battlefield a little bit spicier.

For first level spells, you get Bless from being a divine soul, as well as Compelled Duel, Speak with Animals, and Thunderwave from being an Anarch. For your actually chosen spells, Mage Armor makes your outfit feasible, and Feather Fall will be very helpful once you start flying.

2. Sorcerer 2: Second level sorcerers become a Font of Magic, giving you sorcerer points equal to your sorcerer level. Right now you can turn points into spell slots or vice versa, but it’ll get more interesting later. 

You can also cast Disguise Self, in case you have to, I don’t know, organize a servant-based wacky races kind of event? Idk, whatever.

3. Sorcerer 3: Third level sorcerers get Metamagic, letting you alter your spells to suit your mood by using sorcery points. A Transmuted spell lets you swap out its acid, cold, fire, lightning, poison, or thunder damage for another option on that list. Meanwhile, you can use a Distant spell to double a spell’s range, making your archery much more effective.

You also become a Radiant Soul, spending an action to transform yourself and gaining a flying speed for up to a minute. You can also deal extra radiant damage to a creature you hit with an attack or spell once per turn. You can do this once per long rest. It’s not a long trip, but it’s free.

On top of that, you get second level spells this turn. Distort Value lets you halve or double an object’s apparent value for the duration, perfect for haggling with a certain someone. You also get Beast Sense and Shatter from your Anarch spell list. The former isn’t that in-character, but the latter is a good start to taking down that mountain.

4. Sorcerer 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to round up your Constitution and Charisma, giving you more health, better concentration, and stronger spells. What a glow up!

You can also cast the cantrip Resistance to add 1d4 to a creature’s next save, or use Find Traps to make sneaking into Gilgamesh’s many treasure vaults slightly easier. If it works.

5. Sorcerer 5: You’re a god, so you probably shouldn’t be messing up that often. To help with that, Magical Guidance lets you spend a sorcery point to re-roll a failed skill check. Maybe it’ll help.

You can also cast Fly this level, giving you more frequent flying miles at the cost of your concentration. You can also Conjure Animals if you want to show up that gazelle-loving sister of yours. More on-target, however, is your other Anarch spell, Conjure Barrage. Gosh, it’s almost like you’re an archer or something.

6. Cleric 1: This whole flying around exploding things is great, but I think we can put more pizazz on it. Or, as they say down in Amonkhet, let’s add some Zeal. That’s right, we’re stealing from two MTG planes this build! As a Priest of Zeal, you can attack as a bonus action if you attack as an action a number of times per long rest equal to your wisdom modifier. That sounds kind of useless, but as a Zeal Cleric you also get proficiency with martial weapons, meaning that yes, you can use a bow and arrow. The archer class really is made up of archers!

You can also cast and prepare Spells using your Wisdom, but we got the really good ones in your sorcerer list, so don’t worry too much here. You do get some more cantrips, though! Thaumaturgy lets you throw your godly weight around, Light lets you cast light again using a worse casting modifier, and Guidance gives a creature some helpful advice from their favorite goddess, adding 1d4 to their next check.

You also get some domain spells, but they’re both smites and you’re an archer, so...

7. Cleric 2: The real reason we’re dipping is for your Channel Divinity option, which you can use once per short rest. You could  use it for Turn Undead, forcing a wisdom save against all undead near you (with a dc of 8 + proficiency + wisdom modifier), but the much more fun option is Consuming Fervor. This turns one fire or thunder damage roll into its maximum instead of rolling. That will be very scary later.

8. Sorcerer 6: Sixth level divine souls get Empowered Healing. You might not have any healing spells, but just being around people makes them feel a bit better. This lets you spend a sorcery point to re-roll any dice being used in a healing roll near you once per turn.

Speaking of healing, we’re still not doing that! You can now Bestow Curses onto people. Serves them right, calling you a “useless goddess”. This is one of those creative spells, so have fun with it!

9. Sorcerer 7: Seventh level sorcerers get fourth level spells! Anarchs get Dominate Beast and Stoneskin, and while neither are technically in character the latter could be very useful given your less than stellar AC. Also, literally turning yourself into gemstones is a real power move.

Your spell of choice this level is Ice Storm, letting you pummel a 20′ radius area with plenty of hail (or fiery debris, or just pure force), enough to turn the area into difficult terrain for a round.

10. Sorcerer 8: Use this ASI to grab the Spell Sniper feat, letting your spells ignore most cover, and spells you cast that require an attack roll have two times their normal range. You also learn Eldritch Blast to further flex on those dumb warlocks. They have to sell their soul and waste an invocation to get 300′ range blasts, and here you are with 480′ range and your soul’s intact! Hah!

You can also exude an Aura of Purity now, preventing disease, weakening poison damage, and granting advantage on a ton of status effect saves. 

11. Sorcerer 9: Ninth level sorcerers get fifth level spells, including your final Anarch spell, Destructive Wave. It’s only got a range of thirty feet, but it never hurts to prepare for an ambush. For longer range attacks, Flame Strike will do nicely. We’re still not quite at “blasting a mountain to smithereens” level power, but we’re getting there.

12. Sorcerer 10: Tenth level sorcerers can get the most out of their spells by making them Empowered, letting them re-roll a number of dice on their damage roll, up to their charisma modifier.

You can also cast Dancing Lights for a bit of a dramatic flair, or Creation to make gemstones out of thin air. Heck, you could even make a proper Boat of Heaven with this!

13. Sorcerer 11: Another two levels have passed, that means you get another spell level. Sunbeam gives you a reusable sunlight blast, dealing radiant damage and blinding creatures that fail their constitution save. You can use this attack again as your action each turn for up to a minute. Sadly this isn’t affected by either of your range enhancements, but you’ve still got plenty of airspace to work with.

14. Sorcerer 12: If we’re going to blast a mountain apart we’ve got to get serious. Use this ASI to get the Elemental Adept feat, focusing on Thunder damage. Once you take this feat, all dice on thunder damage rolls coming from spells always count as at least a 2, and they ignore thunder resistances.

15. Sorcerer 13: The first step to launching the literal planet Venus at somebody is actually getting the damn thing, and that means we need to leave the atmosphere at a moment’s notice. The closest we can come to that here is Plane Shift. You can also use this on enemy creatures as a melee attack

16. Sorcerer 14: Fourteenth level Divine Souls get an Angelic Form you can transform into as a bonus action. This gives you a flying speed of 30′ that is basically permanent until you’re incapacitated or you just get rid of them on your own. Have fun with those orbital bombardments!

17. Sorcerer 15: Sunburst sounds like a good pick for your eighth level spell. This one actually does get a range boost, which is good because it deals damage in a 60′ radius. Creatures within that radius get a constitution save, and failing that means a lot of radiant damage and being blind until it makes the save on the end of its turn. Sadly, it’s stuck on radiant damage, but it’s still an effective blasting spell.

18. Sorcerer 16: Use your last ASI to max out your Charisma so that whole “making the save” thing from last level never happens.

19. Sorcerer 17: To make those saves even less likely, our final metamagic option is Heightened Spell, causing one creature’s first save of the spell in question to be made at disadvantage. Basically you’re saying “like you had a choice in the matter”.

Speaking of spells though, we can finally pull Venus through for a charged shot, thanks to the ninth level spell Meteor Swarm. With a max range of 1-2 miles this truly is nuking the planet from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

Here’s a step by step guide for removing a mountain. 1. Hang out in the Troposphere. 2. Cast Meteor Swarm, swapping out Fire for Thunder damage. 3. Channel Divinity, maxing out the thunder damage for extra fun. 4. Deal 120 Thunder damage that ignores resistances, on top of 20d6 bludgeoning damage. 5. Enjoy your new crater.

20. Sorcerer 18: Your capstone level of sorcerer gives you an Unearthly Recovery. When you’re bloodied, you can spend a bonus action to heal yourself for half your HP, once per long rest. You had enough trouble in the underworld as it is, no point in going back again.

Pros:

As I just mentioned in level 19, you can deal a lot of damage. Like, Sanson level damage, without all the nonsense attached to it. You’ve got big booms, and multiple ways to make those booms hurt even more than they should.

Flying on a spellcaster is just. Really, really good. Especially on one built for range. There’s almost literally nothing they can do to you up here. Like, arrows, maybe, but you can just retaliate with the literal wrath of god. Plus, you’re probably out of counterspell range, so there’s nothing the DM can do to you!

A lot of your spells are focused on damage, but you do still have plenty of variety in your spell list, just in case. And on the off chance you’re fighting someone in a silence bubble, you can just change your thunder spells to acid or something.

Cons:

For most of this build we’re relying on the Flight spell to get off the ground, which eats up your Concentration and has a chance of failure when you take damage. It’s not ideal.

Those Cleric Levels are very useful, but they still push back your spell progression by 2 levels, which means you’ll have even less time with your An Gal Ta Ki Gal Se than you would normally.

You can’t fly everywhere. Caves exist. Buildings exist. I mean you totally can blast holes to get where you need to, just don’t expect to be that popular with whoever owns the building. Also, fighting in cramped areas plays to your biggest weakness: squishiness. Your AC is only 15, and you’ve got barely over 120 HP, which as we just discussed, someone built like you can take out very easily.

[fermented-writers-block]

Submitted by @sepublic:

So a while back, my pal @fermented-writers-block aired a theory. To sum up the abridged version, they suggested that if the Boiling Isles was allegorical to an Underworld, and the Human World to… Well, itself, then what of a third realm above? What if there was a parallel to an angelic realm, one populated by the show’s equivalent to a race of angels/Valkyries? They speculated that Emperor Belos himself may have been one of them, cast out… And he desires the portal and access to the Human World, in order to access this hypothetical Angel Realm!

In our discussions, we came across the idea that the Human World functions like neutral territory. It is the realm between realms, the buffer/barrier between the Angel Realm and the Demon Realm. It is where the two come together, and where influences from both have leaked in, to inspire real-world myths; A callback to Eda’s line in the first episode! The Portal, as speculated by my pal, potentially is rooted in the Human World, giving it equal access to the Angel and Demon Realms respectively- As a result of the Human World being between both of them respectively!

If the three realms were bus seats, the Angel Realm might be the Window Seat, while the Demon Realm is the set right next to the aisle where people walk up and down across the bus… And the Human World is sandwiched right between! This of course means that in order for either the Demon or Angel Realm to access one another, it would be through the Human World… With only the Human World maintaining access to BOTH realms, instead of just the one!

Ergo… Given the theory that Belos intends to reconnect to this Angel Realm, it makes sense that he wants to access the Human World! To him, it’s merely a stepping stone, not his destination… The ladder he needs to reach the top, it’s his stopping point before he can progress on to the end! He has no interest in the Human World, as he claims, beyond utilizing it as a passageway to something far grander and more interesting.

But now… onto a certain idea behind Belos.

To put it simply; Fermented Writer’s Block and I think that Belos could potentially be a Satanic/Lucifer allegory. A Fallen Angel, in a sense. From a Doylist perspective, this would settle Disney’s concerns over depicting Heavenly characters as negative, as the only truly negative Angel in this sense would be a literal Satanic allegory. It’d be like Doom, in a sense!

I’ve discussed… a LOT in the past, the idea of Luz and Belos being counterparts. Even if we don’t have much within canon, there IS the association with Light, as well as the ability to communicate with the Titan to some degree. Luz’s name literally means Light… And Lucifer means Light Bringer! It’s in the name, Luz-ifer! If Belos is a twisted counterpart to Luz’s guiding light, then perhaps he’s a more literal take on the Satanic allegory…

Specifically, the idea of an Angel who was cast out of their world and fell, plummeting into a realm beneath that of the Human World! We’re already making allusions with Lilith’s name, after all. And I’d LOVE to see The Owl House tackle some more classic, eldritch takes on the Angels of old and their original interpretations, such as the Seraphs!

After all, people have noted the similarities between Belos and the idea of Christian Imperialism. If Belos were a literal ‘angel’, or the show’s equivalent, this would be a fitting twist! Fermented Writer’s Block also observed that on one page of the Unauthorized History of the Boiling Isles, Belos is depicted with almost mechanical wings, in addition to the book being somewhat burnt. What if this could imply burnt wings on Belos’ part? Especially given Belos’ mechanical, industrial motifs and deteriorated nature...

If Belos WERE a Fallen Angel, then perhaps his Wings motif amidst the Emperor’s Coven imagery is intentional. Not only does it hearken back to his true origins and identity… But it could also allude to him having burnt wings, which in itself is symbolic of a Fallen Angel, as someone who was outcast and can no longer fly! The dude IS associated with Fire, to a degree… His throne room is lit by blazing braziers. Amity and Boscha are associated with his Coven System, in a sense… Amity is indoctrinated into its values and wants to join the Emperor’s Coven, while Boscha’s ideas of hierarchy and elitism reflect Belos’ values rather well. Both characters are associated with Fire… Which, helps to serve as a unifying motif among them- Especially with Lilith, who has blue fire and was leader of the Emperor’s Coven!

It’s a contrast to Luz and her Ice, and what she stands for… Her Light is reflective, while the Light of characters like Belos is harsh, dangerous, and off-putting. If Luz were more comparable to a night star, shining amidst the darkness and providing guidance- Then Belos is like the Sun, harsh, bright, demanding attention from all… But also too powerful to be personal with, something to be regarded from a distance, and never closely looked at. This would fit into Belos’ enigmatic nature, and the idea of him heralding Day, while Luz is Night… After all, Owls are nocturnal! And if Belos is a coming dawn, then that could tie into Angelic motifs… Amidst Luz’s Night bringing an end to his Light! It’s a take on that age-old term, about the Sun never setting on the British Empire… And THAT empire is emblematic of colonialism and imperialism as a whole!

It could also allude to the myth of Icarus- A mortal who flew too close to the sun! Of course in this scenario, Belos was in fact an Angel… But there’s still the recurring theme of wanting more, of one’s circumstances not being enough, of being guided by arrogance- It’s shared between Lucifer and Icarus both, to varying degrees. Perhaps Belos tried to lead a revolt in the Angel Realm, or got too arrogant… Either way, he was cast out- He flew too close to the Sun he wished to embody, and so his wings were burnt. Clipped of the thing most emblematic of his identity, no longer able to fly and ascend… Belos fell to the Earth, and then even deeper.

It’d tie into Belos having earthen motifs, as someone who can no longer fly. Him having angelic aesthetics, underscored by demonic motifs and growls, fits into the idea of Lucifer having been a beautiful angel, only to become the literal Devil and leader of Hell and all of its horrific demons! Belos already has a decayed, deteriorated condition to him that implies he’s not in the best health. Perhaps his burnt wings are the cause of this- Or at least another symptom of whatever injuries he suffered in the past? Not only that, but returning to the Icarus motifs… If we want to get meta, we can ascertain that Dana Terrace has read Fullmetal Alchemist. She knows of Hiromu Arakawa’s artstyle, citing it as something Luz would emulate back home- And there’s that other post comparing Father and Belos!

If Belos is like Father, then there’s once again that idea of using a portal to access a heavenly ‘realm’, through the Sun, in order to access a ‘God’ figure, or beings around that level. Not only that, but Fullmetal Alchemist, from its very beginning, made a very pointed reference to the myth of Icarus, likening its main protagonist Edward Elric to him! If Father is in some ways a foil to Ed, just as Belos could be to Luz… Then it makes sense for Dana to have been inspired by Icarus by virtue of his tale being important to the themes of Fullmetal Alchemist! And if Belos IS a Satanic allegory… Well, Lucifer’s name literally means Morning Star. As Belos’ antithesis, Luz brings the sunset to his Day of Unity. They’re both outcasts to the Demon Realm, but from different worlds respectively.

Now, there’s a question- Who are the Angels? What do they look like? And where does the Owl Deity factor into all of this? Well, this gets me onto my NEXT part;

I think the Owl Deity could be the closest thing to ‘God’ in this universe, AKA an all-powerful deity who reigns above all! A while back, a background artist for the show released some art he did, depicting Luz and King resting beneath a spire. If one looks closely at the top, they can see a depiction of Belos himself! And right above it is candles, surrounding an Owl… An Owl above all. Perhaps we’re looking too deeply into this. But it brings to mind a pun, about the God of All Things… Also being the God of ‘Owl’ Things!

If the candles are lit, then this suggests fire’s association with the heavens, which fits into biblical depictions of Angels! Not only that, but Belos is right beneath the Owl… And right beneath him is a fleshy stump, indicative of his own motifs… And it’s connected to what appears to be a giant eye right beneath him! Eyes are a big motif in the Boiling Isles –and amongst biblical angels- so perhaps the fleshy stump, akin to Belos’ constructs, is symbolic? That he’s bridging the gap between the demonic world below, and the heavenly world above?

Regardless, the next portion of this theory suggests that the Owl Deity is a supreme being. Perhaps a neutral mediator between both the Angel and Demon Realms, with the Human World as neutral ground. Perhaps a weapon, utilized by the Angels? Or a powerful deity they managed to sway… More on that later. Regardless, it DOES make one consider the Clawthornes’ connection to the Owl Deity, specifically Eda’s. Her house DOES have the only known depictions of this enigmatic being, after all.

And THAT house was likely fashioned, at least partly, from a tower! Towers are known for their reach towards the skies… Could a Clawthorne Ancestor have been connected to the Owl Deity as a worshipper? A follower? Maybe they were ALSO an Angel, like Belos, albeit not fallen… Or at least, much more well-intentioned! It could bring a dark twist to Lilith’s line about Eda being with her ‘real’ family… Unbeknownst to her, Belos, being a fallen Angel, is arguably ‘family’ in the sense that the hypothetical Clawthorne Ancestor was ALSO an Angel! After all, it might better explain how Eda has access to the Portal. Not to mention that golden, blazing Owl Wraith she summons during her final battle with Lilith… Birds ARE a Clawthorne Motif, after all! And Angels have bird wings.

If Belos IS similar to Father from Fullmetal Alchemist, then it makes sense that there’s a ‘God’ he plans to usurp as a Lucifer allegory. The Owl Deity could be this god, or at least associated with the Heavens that Belos seeks to conquer and return to. That of course gets us into the symbolism behind the angelic motifs of the Emperor’s Coven. Now, when Belos first arrived in the Demon Realm, he would have been acting VERY contrary to the Boiling Isles’ values about magic at the time, and he clearly had to utilize plenty of force and genocide to make people comply. In other words, this is a dude who cares not about conforming to others, but making others conform to him…

So it doesn’t make as much sense for Belos to change his aesthetics to an Angelic one, to appease the Boiling Isles residents if he’s clearly averse to everything else they do! Especially if Angels, or what lingering memory of them there is, is seen as negative by the Boiling Isles… The point being, this alludes to Belos being genuine about his Angelic motifs, and not adopting them to appear more palatable to others; Because all of his behavior suggests otherwise, that he forces others to adapt to him, rather than the other way around!

Not only that, but if the Emperor’s Coven is Belos’ attempt at reinstating his ideal form of heavenly rule/environment on the Boiling Isles… And if the Owl Deity is a god to be conquered, then how fitting is it that his subordinate wears an Owl Mask? Perhaps it’s meant to arrogantly symbolic… That the Owl figure that Belos once looked up to, now serves him! Of course it’s only in symbols; But the idea is there, that the image and motif of Owls has been appropriated, not as a holy being above Belos, but instead as an image belonging to a subservient minion.

Now, this all leads into another question- What about the Titan? What does the Titan have to do with this? And for that matter, what of the giant Titan remains, scattered across the Boiling Seas- We know others exist, but OUR Titan is the only known intact corpse! Well…

In Understanding Willow, Hooty briefly mentions his backstory. It’s hard to discern, but he mentions how it all began with a hunt, and how there were blood-red skies before Eda and King’s dialogue cuts him off and drowns out the noise. There IS the idea of Hooty being a lobotomized and weakened reincarnation of the Owl Deity, or at least a spawn of it… Or having SOME association with it, moreso than most characters! We don’t know what killed the Titans, or why OUR Titan’s corpse is intact. There could be Doylist answers to this, maybe it’s meant to be a mystery that’s never explored, but left to a sublime imagination…

But if not, then this is where I get into a crazy idea here;

Angels are depicted as adversarial with Demons. The Titans would’ve been the first Demons, of the Demon Realm. We know one of them had Magic... And if Belos is any indication as a fallen angel, there may be a heavenly aversion to magic. Hooty recalls it all beginning with a hunt…

What if the Angels hunted down the Titans? It’d explain their sudden extinction… As for why our Boiling Isles (BI) Titan is still intact, well. Perhaps it was a lone survivor! Perhaps its Magical ability permitted it to last longer than others, before it too succumbed to death after the genocide. For all we know, its Magical ability was what drove the Angels to commit genocide upon the Titans, for fear of an uprising! Either they failed to target the Titan actually responsible for finding magic, or they kept them from spreading their craft to others by killing off anyone else who would be willing to learn.

If Hooty has a connection to the Owl Deity… Well, remember when he mentioned being haunted by his actions forever, in Adventures in the Elements? What if the Owl Deity led this ‘hunt’ against the Titans… Either as a creation of the Angels, or as a neutral mediator who was swayed to their ideas of magic being dangerous! Either way, there seems to be a recurring theme of regret and remorse… Perhaps when all was said and done, the Owl Deity rejected its actions, and banished itself to the Boiling Isles? Maybe the Clawthorne Ancestor was connected to/IS the Owl Deity… As for how the Owl Deity died, maybe it simply willed itself out of existence in shame. Maybe it succumbed to injuries from the water. Either way, the Titan didn’t erase all traces of it, which could imply some forgiveness on its part… That, or the Titan was too dead to act in outright vengeance, who knows?

Regardless, the story goes- A Titan discovers Magic, is deemed a threat by the Angels. The Angels lead a mass extermination of its kind, with the Titan the sole survivor. The Owl Deity helps lead the hunt, but comes to regret its war crimes, and dies amidst the BI Titan’s corpse, laying the foundations for the Owl House. As I said, the BI Titan also eventually dies, alone and traumatized, as the Angels head back home.

Owl Deity culls rest of titans, is about to finish the Titan when it realizes the horror of what it did

Either the Titan took it out in a pyrrhic victory, or - more likely - the Owl Deity, being an entity focused on balance and neutrality, allowed itself to be killed/seriously wounded as way to “rebalance” things as much as it can for its nigh complete genocide

We know that Belos claims to enforce the will of the Titan. Well, if he’s a fallen angel… What if he’s persuading the Titan to help it get revenge? What if as a fallen angel, he arrived on the Boiling Isles and approached the Titan’s spirit, proclaiming himself as trustworthy, in an Enemy of my Enemy situation? Belos would point to him and the Titan as being wounded and rejected by the angels to some extent. Belos would have insider knowledge on his kind. If the Angels swayed the Owl Deity, what if Belos swayed the Titan to his side by offering it the chance to strike back at the Heavens for its crimes, and avenge its fallen brethren?

When Belos claims to enforce the Titan’s will, he’s not completely wrong- It DOES feel justifiable anger, though clearly Belos is capitalizing and manipulating this anger, and then passing off the Titan’s actions as solely its own, and not at all a product of Belos’ own manipulations in any shape or form. You know how I likened Belos to Father… And my past theories about Belos resurrecting the Titan, on the Day of Unity?

Hooty mentions it all began with a hunt, with blood-red skies. What if the skies are blood-red once more, on the Day of Unity? As the realms converge or whatnot… What if Belos’ weapon to defeat his Angelic brethren is none other than the resurrected Titan, wielding full access to the powers of Magic, and with vengeance in its heart? What if Belos resurrects the Titan on the Day of Unity, possibly with its body underneath HIS control as a parasite… We could have a scene mirroring that iconic moment from Fullmetal Alchemist, where a continent-sized Father rises from the ground and reaches out to the Heavens, accessing them with the Portal! Just replace Father’s gigantic form with the Titan’s resurrected, magic-fueled body!

Now, this does lead into the idea of settling the Angels as antagonists, once Belos is done and over with. Perhaps a resurrected Owl Deity will be instrumental, with the help of Luz and the others? If she’s the Night to Belos’ Day, then perhaps she needs to set the sun on Belos’ reign, on his Day of Unity! It all begins and ends with blood-red skies, after all. Perhaps with the help of a resurrected Owl Deity, Luz can appease the Titan, or at least sway it to not turn to vengeance and jeopardize the Boiling Isles inhabitants in the process. She has experience with calming down vengeful entities in the past, as seen with Inner Willow… And Luz CAN communicate with the Titan!

Especially if the Angels have grown to also regret their actions, as a parallel to characters like Lilith! Or at least, the Angels can be held in line and prevented from further massacres, with the resurrected Owl Deity. If the Owl Deity is regretful of its actions, then perhaps we could get a scene calling back to Understanding Willow… Where Belos, at the last second, sways the Owl Deity to his logic, and suggests vengeance and annihilation of the Angels! The Owl Deity, frighteningly, agrees for a moment, reminding the Angels that its genocide of them is merely finishing what THEY started, after all…!

But then Luz steps in. Alongside the others, such as Amity and Willow, Lilith and King, Eda, and so forth… She persuades the Owl Deity to have forgiveness in its heart, especially if the Angels show remorse and a desire to fix mistakes! It’d hearken back to the theme of having justified anger, but otherwise channeling it productively into fixing mistakes, rather than simply harming the one responsible for them! It’s about a productive way of tackling issues, rather than focused on punishment; Again, a theme as far back as the first scene, when Luz is punished with the Summer Camp, VS actually having her emotional issues properly addressed, and being given the chance to fix the damage.

Our protagonists could all call back to similar incidents, with Lilith citing how Eda sparing her gave her the chance to fix the damage, or at least remedy it… Instead of JUST dying as retribution! How Willow chose to still retain her feelings, but also spared Amity so the girl could change and improve as a person, instead of just killing her off and calling it a day. It’s about not only recognizing damage, but working to properly fix and recover from it- Recovery is the key word! Fixing the damage together, as Luz said- Productively fixing what was caused, instead of beating oneself over it, the way Amity and Lilith initially did!

This could lead to the Owl Deity, especially if it has Hooty’s memories, being swayed back to a good stance. It’d contrast Belos and his inability to grow, heal, and recover from his emotional and physical wounds! Either way, perhaps the Owl Deity could make peace with the Angels, or at least ensure they genuinely change their attitudes and behaviors. Belos is stopped, and the Titan can finally be laid to rest, its spirit perhaps still communicating with whoever is willing and eager to learn Magic, the same way it did!

Now, this does leave the question- Who was Belos during the Titan Genocide, if he was an Angel? Was he even alive back then? This gets me into the speculation that Fermented Writers Block made, of Private New Guy being an allegory to Belos… If Hooty was haunted by his actions that night, well. Perhaps Belos was just another young recruit, another generic Angel in the hunt- But he was inspired by the Owl Deity, maybe even saw it as someone to emulate? And that’s part of why he’s so power-hungry and bloodthirsty, because of his ‘idol’…

Yet ironically, Belos is merely projecting his idea and desire for what he wants the Owl Deity to be, VS what it actually is- A repentant, remorseful entity with a lot of guilt! Tying into the idea of characters projecting ideas/expectations onto others that just don’t exist, confusing fantasy with reality… Maybe like Private New Guy, Belos tried to seize power in the Angel Realm, and it’s why he was banished? And hey, going into even MORE mindless speculation- What if Owl Mask was MORE than symbolic of the Owl Deity, but outright the same kind of being? Perhaps they’re Belos’ attempt at recreating the Owl Deity albeit young and/or imperfect, an additional asset to conquer the Angel Realm, in addition to a resurrected Titan. Who knows?

Mind you… ALL OF THIS is one hell of a stretch. It’s an incredibly unlikely theory, that hinges on a LOT of factors… But it’s fun food for thought, is it not? And hey, if you never pick up a shovel, one will never find gold even if it IS there! It’s an extension of the Angel Realm theory, while tying together a bunch of other details here or there, and hearkening to past themes, morals, and lessons. I’m sure that even if this isn’t what Dana and the others have planned, what we WILL get will certainly be just as enjoyable- But until then, it can’t hurt too much to guess a bit, and maybe have some outlandish fun or there, right?