#either it will work out or it wont
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Getting flirted on made me wanna throw up and I had nightmares because of it- I'm so Stressed Out bro 😂😂 its been awhile since the last time someone gets as persistent, and he's not crossing the line or anything it's just me feeling Ugh at the whole idea of Flirting and potential dates. And how everyone around me keeps saying "waiting for the Good News *winks" like I *need* to Progress from this and I feel Pressured to Progress Further despite not Wanting This- or maybe I do Want it or is it me wanting actual date or is it me wanting to be The Perfect Daughter who will Marry a Man?? I'm so stressed out over this bro like im sorry but this isnt making me excited nor happy at all. No offence to The Guy, he didnt do anything wrong...
#red rambles#I had nightmares for like two nights straight bro#like I have to be Pleasing at all times#like if it wont be working out it needs to be him who cut things off#and fuck why does everyone gets so excited over this while im not#calm down Red they all mean well... and hes not a Bad Person its just a few chats#and at least he found me cute I guess???#idk this is all so stressful I hope it ends in brighter things#either it will work out or it wont#(will it work out if I didn't even feel anything and just going along to respect his efforts)#AUGH I DONT KNOW... IM SORRY
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Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest
Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here
Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭
It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony
#the final confrontation was basically his first death again#and YES he Does want the Joker dead#and it would've been really really nice if Batman was the one who did it#but when batman made it clear he wouldn't kill the joker. Jason easily switched to saying “LET me kill the joker” to accommodate#because he Wanted batman to pass his test#he gave a test to dick too. and technically tim but it wasnt the family test it was a different one so it doesnt rly count#AFTER utrh and the reveal and the batarang you can go hog wild about it. i care less about it then#granted i do believe they make jason more scared of the joker after it at some point#i guess because hes a bit too willing to kill the joker and ive heard jason wasnt meant to live after utrh#my watsonian explain for that is he was so fixated on his plan he cpuld override his fear. or maybe the pit. either work#i prefer the fixation bc i dont like the explanation that the pit was the /only/ reason he could get all plan together and done#BUT THATS UNRELATED!!!#dc stop putting the joker in jason stories im begging you please please please. lock him in a vault for the next 20 years or something#it Cpuld be good and i understand. but also. after so long of people that dont know or go for jasons need for family and parents#that love him and he can trust#the joker starts to feel like?? hm. words. a cop out? oh haha its that guy that killed him woagh hes here#i bet you dont even know that jaybin got beat until unconsciousness by an angry mob#while asking batman to save him only for batman to have to walk away#anwya. where was i going with this#i think i got off topic#jason todd#dc comics#batman#ADDED AN EDIT. SORRY. this post has been haunting me it keeps me awake. what if people misunderstand#they cant read my tags where i ramble more depth. thisbis the only option#EDIT EDIT: hiii#removed the sentence abt jason having the joker for several days bc i misremembered some things#go read its-your-mind 's addition instead also#ok no more i wont edit this post anymore i promise
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Been catching up on g3 Monster High, and I'm not done yet, I think im only roughly halfway through, but
I'm so insane about them
If anyone spoils me about anything about them, I will personally eat your kneecaps
#ive never drawn either of them before and it shows#i hope Nefera finds out about their mutual pining#and she thinks it's so adorable and Cleo is so mortified#i hope Nefera tries to give Cleo advice that clearly wont work on Frankie and Cleo knows that and refuses it#so then Nefera goes to Frankie abd gives them advice that clearly wont work but Frankie is like “wow!! thanks!! :D”#art#digital art#monster high#g3 monster high#monster high g3#frankie monster high#monster high frankie#frankie stein#cleo monster high#monster high cleo#cleo de nile
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@kirbyoctournament
⭐J will be open for asks for the duration of the tournament!! And Galacta is there too, I guess
⭐J seems relatively approachable, but is quick to butt heads with anyone who disapproves of her!
⭐J is an adult in her early 30s, and thus is potentially romanceable, if you're brave (or stupid) enough!
⭐ She's been around a while, and knows alot! Feel free to ask her about anything. Who knows if shell give you a straightforward answer though!
#J PLEASE move you are BLOCKING the caption!!! your big ass horns are in the way!!!!!!#not to mention you are EDITING out half the text!!! girl!!!!!#Galacta is not helping either!!! my post!!! my text!!! youre blocking it all out!!! aagghhh!!!#JAU#GSA J#JAU Galacta#Kirby oc#verc3x art#hgghnhn an eternity of procrastination later and the post is done FINALLY#I just have to hope most people are using dark mode and on PC otherwise the “fakeout” wont work 😂#kirby oc tournament#Ive realized that Js type is pink. pink ocs psppsp youll get an advantage buff!! 😂😂😂#I can think of at least three pink ocs shes been shipped with; PLUS there Galacta!!#hhnnghh the post is good ENOUGH MOONIE POST IT!!#curse of being a perfectionist#Im the HOST I should have posted this forever ago!!! 😂
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... Made myself legitimately, physically sad thinking about Kory's place on Earth post NTT /in modern comics generally.
#i have so much catch up to do#but from what i understand/ have seen?#she's either still on whatever incarnation of Titans but like. babysitting. or in TT's Titans generally being ignored#or in RHATO where you could argue she finally snapped but honestly its not even the same character#and it's just ... so sad?#i genuinely hope there's stuff I'm missing and will find out later#because she has no family on Earth except the Titans and it feels like they all either died or moved on#and maybe she's working with the next gen#but who gives a damn about her as Kory?#it makes the writing between her and Roy in RHATO that much worse#because yeah he SHOULD have been fucking worried when she showed up claiming amnesia#and lets be real its not like she's getting respect on earth- dc wont let her#Koriand'r#there's at least a decent friendship with Vic in JL Odyssey from what i remember#but like#... i hope she gets better than i think she does
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Maladaptive daydreaming.
#daydreaming#maladaptive daydreaming#maladapting daydreaming disorder#maladaptive behaviors#maladaptive coping#dissociation#immersive daydreaming#dimond speaks#yeah so adding this to my list here lol#my therapist helped me realize i dissociate a LOT and the primary way i do it is through vivid daydreams#they usually happen at work but they also pop up if i'm having a bad day or... anytime really.#i've also come to the realization that i have at least one of these a day which is not good fgsjh#my therapist says they're not inherently bad especially since they do have a positive effect on my emotions (if its a good daydream)#but it's gotten to the point that it's affecting the way i work#and they can last for a LONG time too#i haven't timed them but i do know they've been over 30 minutes at work before#this is either due to ADHD autism PTSD or a mixture of the three lmao#weeeee#anyway. this post isn't really intended to be a vent post#it's more like a 'this is my experience' type post#it just kinda comes across as somewhat vent-y#but that was because i wanted to try and immerse the reader into what its like to have these daydreams#like mine look NOTHING like this but making it more generic would help others understand it#the void is the general dissociation from reality#then you emerge in the dream#i can feel things as if i'm there- the sun the wind and sometimes even physical touch#and i'll stay there until something snaps me out#strangely i can get my work done while i'm doing this- i just wont have any memory of doing so. it's like being on autopilot#anyway. I hope this post was helpful to someone out there#if you also maladaptive daydream YOU ARE NOT ALONE! it's valid and you're not 'faking' anything. it's a genuine trauma response.
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Kit do you not rep Charles anymore 😭
Of course I do he’s prime I just need a break from his team and that fucking dog
#ask#binottos gone. his bones are gone. sainz on his way out. the evil has been DEFEATED#we did it. we found everything that was wrong wid Ferrari and put it in a box and sent it far far away where it cant hurt us anymore#finally a clean slate for elkann and a blank cheque for vasseur to rebuild il cavallino the way enzo wanted. pure italian excellence#and a semi italian boy to lead it all. vasseur FINALLY recognizes leclercs potential as n1 and turns him into the central piece of a new er#they get him hamilton. biggest media event in f1 history#a proven winner. an upgrade in every way. bigger than ferrari? that wont be a question he'll need to answer#binotto is bones. f1-75 is dust. next year sainz will be nothing but a bad memory and the rusting crux of all their PAST problems#this is vasseurs vision now. his holy plan. his sf-24. his personnel. wid elkanns blessings and his deep. deep pockets.#2 years later. the monster's gone. vasseur is here.#and what has vasseur done?#the garages remain the same. no big poaches from rivals. nothing to prepare for hamiltons arrival.#maranello follows a dev path that comes from the same wind tunnel as haas. haas' data correlates. their upgrades work. ferrari's dont.#last 2 upgrades failed because the very concept of the car was wrong. 2 months behind at least.#((took merc almost 2 and a half years to deal wid the damage of an incorrect baseline and correct course))#ferrari came into the triple header 2nd in the standings and left wid 50 points TOTAL. baby mclarens-first-wcc run behind by 7#out of those 50 points none was sharls#sharl has scored 1 point in 4 fucking races#vasseur's ferrari has turned a generational qualifier into a kid whose idea of making pole is running experiments in q3#because who cares anyway if the car is setup for races except it aint setup for that shit either#so quali has to work ((it doesnt)) sunday has to be flawless ((never is)) but to point fingers is a worse crime than this approach to gp's#last gp. silverstone. as representative as it gets. sharl fails to make q3#bouncing around in a setup that hadnt been previously tested on either fp but wud surely make it worth their sunday#sunday: sharl gets lapped#ik sharl better than this#but idk what im looking at rn#I ignored the influencer milestone special helmet because I expected a performance that wud make me forget it#I need him to be a racing driver#he says 'he cant find the words anymore' bro I rlly need him to find them#I'll always ALWAYS root for sharl but to keep it 💯 idk what I'm rooting for anymore
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DAYBREAK MENTION FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 65 CHAPTERS!!! BABYGIRL I MISS YOUUUU
#prince's talk tag#WHERE IS HE I NEED TO KNOW HES OK!!#yes i know he got fired at the end of chapter 27 but his luck is so good i imagine he bounced back quickly#i need him and twilight to interact again!! there so fun!!#i know it wont happen but imagine he somehow ends up working for WISE and he and twilight get paired for a mission#or twilight and yor have missions to do but dont wanna leave anya alone and no one is available atm so they hire someone#and that someone is daybreak#but since twilight already left by the time he arrived and yor was the one that greeted him before she left#twilight couldnt stop him from potentially blowing his cover (like he thinks hes been made but it was just a coincidence)#OR he is there when daybreak arrives but he can't send him away without raising suspicion so he has to take the L#and he either spends the whole chapter worried or he tries to go home to check on them but cant#meanwhile anya has read their minds and knows theyve met before and she gets excited which makes it harder for twilight to send daybreak off#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i miss him soooooo much#ENDO WHERE IS HE??? WHY DID YOU LOCK HIM IN YOUR BASEMENT!! LET HIM OUT!!!!!#this was from ch 92 i was catching up bc i wanted a bunch of chapters to come out so i can read them all in one go#and yo that reveal anya pulled on damien during their dance!!!! so good!!!!#like yea he didnt believe her but she said it and he'll think about it whenever she say something she couldnt possibly of known#sxf#spy x family
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mr house never being able to replicate his courier six because they never let him scan them, so all he has are a few shoddy recordings he took to recreate the courier from. his replicas of courier six are flawed: none are as perceptive, resourceful and proactive. they aren't good at out-of-the-box thinking or improvising. their problemsolving, diplomacy skills and technological innovation ideas fall short of the original and are just another disappointment every time. they end up hollow shells like jane, marilyn and victor. letting new vegas go, ruin itself in pursuit of recreating his perfect right hand again, hope for another fruitful partnership and bright future of the mojave like they did before is so delicious it makes me sick actually send tweet ✌
#ulysses warned my courier house would sooner or later put her face on a robot servant and he was right!! and she knew he was!!!#but the way house went about it in my headcanon is making me sick in the stomach!!!!!!!!!!!!!#the devnotes?? that allied courier was his first true prodigy/son/daughter IN 200 HUNDRED YEARS??? sickening. i love it#add a fucked up romantic-not-really-only-pining storyline into that already crazy cocktail and im eating it up!!!!!!!!!!! YUM!!!!#my courier is a technophile but she's got a shred of self-respect and wont let (out of pride mostly) house scan her brain#she dies ensuring the continuation of new vegas setting it up to prosper only for house to let it go to shit.... the drama.........#because he cannot imagine a world without his partner who has changed the world around them so much in such a short life....#so he sets out to recreate even a shred of her glory so they may continoue to reign over the mojave but he fails miserably over and over#and his pursuit blins him to the shit stirring on the streets and the area that even his army of securitrons isnt able to stop#either the nv clans successfuly rebel/make the city go to shit while he's too busy working on the courier copies#or some outside party infiltrates and gets his ass while he's not looking. rip#either way my courier is always the death of mr house whether they are allied or not bc i love doomed narratives#personal#delete later#fallout#? technically#till we get season 2 of the tv show im able to brainstorm ideas as to what happened to nv after fnv ended!!!! SOMEBODY STOP ME (dont)#im cutting this extremely short my thought on this are pretty long i couldnt fall asleep on monday bc ulysses' words were haunting me
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do you write fic on ao3?
unfortunately for everyone involved i do!
#ask#and if youre wondering about my handle i write on anon so its doesnt particularly matter (shrugs)#and also i think its pretty easy to figure out which fics ive written because i want to makeout mad sloppy style with an em dash#anyways (waves offhandely) it doesnt really matter much because i have like posted an ss on here before so you know#its not like im trying to hide it like eh#but also because of my disposition that would put a tranced rabbit to shame i dont exactly yell it from the hilltops either#the moral of the story is if you ask me what im working on ill yap about it maybe like post an excerpt#and months later youll find something posted on anon and youll be like oh! so they finally posted it!#so to spare you all (lies on my tummy like we're at a sleepover and giggles) you wanna hear what im working on#haha of course you do youre a prisoner in my yap box#and i want an excuse to talk about it hidden in the tags so people skim over it and not read it <3#SO the earliest wip is from like early october about a magical realism au because i rewatched lwa as i usually do and well theres this one#ep about a magical animal if you will... and you can kinda guess what it is from that lol its sashaforsyekky#because the dreaded @/tungpin infected me with the brainworms about this trio specifically#and it really is ekky going 🥺 at whatever sashaforsy have (persumably) got going on woe is him its at 5k rn but uh ive stalled progress#because puppyekky has consumed my every thought which leads me to my second wip that ive been labouring over since the start of october#that also just broke 5k and not even remotely done lol whoops but its puppy ekky in a team environment with a heavy emphasis on the euros#rn there are scenes scrabbled out with sasha (multiple) mikksy luosty lundy and forsy. i know i have an idea for bobby.#and really lets see where the muse takes us i have vague ideas that are mmmhmm but we'll see when we get there!#the third one isnt the most likely to get finished but uh it is sashamaffhew global series stuff because it stemmed from#“it really is funny that sasha is treating the finland trip like he knocked up a girl#and is trying to make her meet his parents so it doesnt feel like a shotgun wedding when he you know marries her to take responsibility“#and i just think a maffhew pov with that thought in mind because of the whole touchy at e11even thing is funny to me like think mundane#slice of life oh i feel like im being wined and dined i hope i dont fuck it up jfc i think im fucking it up oh god this feels romantic#anyways it feels remotely ooc to me and it really was more of like a writing break from the wips stated above so (shrugs)#might not see the light of day but its 2k as of now so i do feel its a shame if i dont /try/ to finish it you know? its just low priority#anyways thats my writing check in and i am a prisoner to my own mind i will go insane haha these wont be published anytime soon#because i am slow and get distracted soooo easily so you know <3
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im so mad that this is a side blog account and not a main account. i started this blog when i was still relatively new to tumblr and i think i was… like. fourteen years old or something. i never thought i would continue for this long, and i never knew so many people would like the content i put out here (i have over 9k followers which is literally mind-blowing, like wow….).
because this isnt a main account, i cant respond to replies left on my posts, i cant really reply to anyone unless i reblog !! i cant even follow people with this blog, it just comes up as my main blog (which is not pjo-related… rip my failed attempts at organising my fandoms to different blogs). so my avenues of interaction with a lot of you are seriously impeded.
so i just want to say i am so thankful for all of you, i read every single person’s tags who reblog my stuff, i read all of your replies and every time im crying screaming rolling around on the ground in agony over the fact i CANT REPLY!!
i know my posts are super inconsistent these days, im glad so many are still here! i think i may change some of my content eventually (never gonna get rid of the incorrect quote stuff, i’ll just be adding some other things like pjo headcanons or analyses or something), just to spice some stuff up on here.
#also! im currently writing a fantasy book rn and have been so stressed over the fact that authors are expected to have a following before—#—reaching out to agencies with a manuscript. and i seriously stress about creating a following.#so my backup plan is literally you guys. my four year old pjo account on tumblr with its silly little quotes 😭😭#and like. if that works. could you imagine. that you guys may actually save my future ??? like?? i love you guys for just following me bc ??#YOU MAY SAVE ME FROM THE CAPITALIST PRESSURES OF SENSATIONALISING ONES OWN ART FOR INVESTED SUCCESS YAYYYYYY#anyways im not going to promote it now bc its still in the first draft area. not near for me to even go thru revisions yet. i may never-#-promote it on here. i dont want to annoy people with suddenly changing tracks. and i def wont transform this blog into a self promo for me-#-thats never going to happen! i would make another blog for it but for now everything’s just an idea!#i just wanted to say thank you because this has been giving me so much anxiety especially since graduating high school. the problems of—#—trying to be an author have become more pressing and immediate for me. i hope it will happen one day but who knows#you guys give me confidence though. and i literally cannot thank u guys enough (I HATEEEEE THE CAREER ANXIETY)#not riordanverse#not incorrect either#for followers#rewriting#sorry for the whole essay in the tags ☠️
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..
#okay so my dad worked in furniture repair and used to come home with random furniture all the time#and i got a set of chairs that i think look rly cool and are comfy#and im looking for a new couch and decided to google the brand to see if i could find something that matches#like. ive never bothered to look into them before bc i just thought they were some modern made retro look ex floor stock#turns out i probably wont ever be able to find the matching two seater bc#WHAT DO U MEAN THEYRE ORIGINAL 70s CHAIRS#dad what were you DOING#so unless i start trawling auctions and vintage resellers its unlikely ill find pieces in the same colour#and the manufacturer doesnt exist any more#so no hope of new model releases either
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"Living in unprecedented times" needs to stop being a euphemism and start referring to stuff like AOC and Tim Walz stream Madden on twitch.
#this post isnt an endorsement of either of them. i do endorse them but thats irrelevant to the post.#twitch is really starting to become a part of election campaigns#both trump and harris have twitch accounts but they really only broadcast their campaign events and stuff#also i know aoc streaming on twitch isnt unprecedented but livestreaming yourself playing madden to get elected might be#trump gave an interview on twitch before i think#i mostly blocked that out of my memories#in both cases a clear attempt to reach the young male demographic#so when do you think we'll have the first candidate forced to drop out of any race because they said a slur in livestreamed gamer rage#i say before 2030#us politics#us elections#election 2024#go vote#im mostly steering clear of election stuff now so i dont explode. its not working.#but let me tell you every time i see “i wont vote bc im special” comments i am ready to throw hands
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literally how do my peers have healthy social lives without destroying their academics. im on such a thin rope here its not even funny
#spacie spoinks#I HAVENT HAD MY REGULARLY SCHEDULED SOCIAL TIME IN. *checks watch*#WEEKS#i pop in say a couple sentences and am dragged off 2 hell#also i havent drawn in WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKS CLAWS AT MY CAGE#I WANT FREEDOM!! FREE ME#IM TIRED OF HAVING 2 TURN DOWN HANGOUTS AND HAVING 2 KEEP CONVOS SHORT#''hey spacie wanna hang ^-^'' ''sorry cant im busy'' ''hey spacie you free?'' ''nope. sorry.''#''hi spacie are you free this week?'' ''no and i wont be free next week either.''#I DIDNT EVEN ENJOY MY FALL BREAK.#I WORKED ALL OF MY FALL BREAK GGUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHH RIPS MY HAIR OUT#thanksgiving break will be different tho... (it wont)
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filler doodles about how i comedically whitewashed myself as a child (despite also being the darkest i had and still have ever been in my entire life) because i cannot wrap my head around it
#filler art#my art#i was also short haired at the time so its odd i drew myself as having very long hair but is it any more weird than me whitwashing myself no#i remember i also imagined myself to grow up as a white girl like#HUH??? like i was so convinced i was going to look like all the white main character girls on television ... i had to look like one#all of this was probably because of the lack of representation in tv i could find at the time tbh#BECAUSE THIS WASNT AN ISSUE OF MY DAY TO DAY LIFE NOOOOOO#in here being... moreno?!?! . brown?!?!! EVEN IF LIGHT IS MILES MORE COMMON THAN BEING WHITE#AND ITS SO MUCH MROE SILLIER BECAUSE I WAS MCUH MORE DARK THAN I CURRENTLY AM BACK THEN#as of now im more so lightskinned . nowhere near white but im not very dark either because i dont see rhe sun often ww so im pale#BACK THEN I GOT BURNT ON THE SUN AS A HOBBY im serious i sat on the hot rock floor with burning sun climate bevause it was nice#NOT EVEN THE CURLS COULD BE SAVED I HAD TO PORTRAY MYSELF AS STRAIGHT HAIRED FOR WHATEVER REASON#like on my defense i did straighten my hair out a lot as a young child but THAT LASTED LIKE 2 DAYS EVERY TIME#so 90% i was curls so its funny#ALSO WHY DID WE CALL THE CREAM COLOR “THE SKIN COLOR” WHAT#like. it wasnt just me . whole elementary school knew if you asked for rhe skin color you talkin about thay#any tone of brown simply did not work I DONT KNOW WHY WE WERE ALL LIKE THIS???#thankfully at the age of 10 i realized i infact had melanin but .. i coudlnt accept i had black hair still💀💀#so my skin and hqir color were always the same in portrayals ITS SO FUNNY IM SORRY#I FIDN THIS INSANELY FUNNY IM SO SORRY#dont feel too concerned i wasnt ashamed of my skin color or anything but i had the warped idea i would look white soon#not if you keep cooking youself in the sun you wont /j#i dont know what to say about how i draw myself now a days i dont draw myself as myself but i know i aint white now its okay 🩷 (/hj)
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anyone else out here a middle child saddled with eldest daughter responsibilities?
#a bumper sticker that says 'middle-child neglect and eldest-child duties'#i want to believe it started when my older sister moved out but. lets be real. it's always been me.#i am genuinely acting care-giver to my chronically ill younger sister while my dad watches basketball on the couch#and my mom doesnt get out of bed.#like. my mom is pretty sick too and works all day and does most of the housekeeping too#so i dont blame her at all.#i mean i guess my dad works all day but. for real king you can't get up off the couch to support your daughter crying and heaving#no that falls to me. yeah yeah I'll get her a drink and make sure she takes her meds.#what's that? yeah I'll rub her back and run a cloth under the sink and bring her something to eat too.#oh? yes fine I wont take a gummy so i wont sleep because she's in a flare up and needs them more than me#to be clear!! I'm not blaming her either like clearly she feels like shit and she feels guilty all the time#i just. some amount of help from anyone else. or at least maybe. idk A DAY I can rest when i feel like shit#but oh- no- she's coughing up bile again. yep I'll come bring a bucket.
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