#dw: lands of magic

[aliensamba]

The Lord of the Rings

[gotyouanyway]

played with language the entire season and the answer to undoing the damage in the finale was a simple double negative.. i'm in love

[mantisgodsdomain]

Here's a vocaloid song I watched that gave off vibes that, while not exactly the same as Marigold's, is probably in at least a related category.

I wanted to hear your thoughts on it.

(Also, tw for medical/dental horror.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdpwOLSKMLA

Oh, we think we know what song this one is.

(pause while we click the link)

We've already watched this one! Novocaine is a Snakemouth Den song, we feel, and to a lesser extent a Dr. H.B. song. Not Marigold, though, just adjacent.

[lowkeyrobin]

Hi sorry if im annoying u but can u do a james hook x reader story . I kenda want the reder to be the dugther of peter pan and hook fell in love whit her.

no need to worry! you're totally fine haha ; but yeah of course I could! ; I decided to make the reader a kind of relative to Peter (sibling/cousin at least) cause age differences and whatnot, even though Peter stays a kid forever, I still didn't wanna do smthn weird lolll but dw I got you ; thanks for requesting, hope you enjoy! ; also I only write they/them / gn readers but I tried to keep readers gender identity pretty in the middle and stuff so

JAMES HOOK ; star crossed lovers

summary ; you and hook fall for each other, your love forbidden as he was a vk, and you were an ak

warnings ; language

disclaimers ; reader can fly & uses pixie dust like peter pan

word count ; 1.1k

masterlist

Hook's eyes land on you from afar, watching as you sprinkle pixie dust upon Bridget and Ella. They had been begging you to let them try out flying, and you'd finally given in halfway through today.

He peers past the concrete wall into the courtyard, watching you three fly about, or really, watch you try to help your friends learn how to fly how you do. You giggle, bouncing back as you practically swim in air, watching them struggle to control themselves. It wasn't as easy as it looked.

"Whoever can fly to class faster wins!" Bridget laughs, looking over at Ella.

"Oh, you're on!" She smiles, dashing toward the nearest doors as fast as she could, attempting to beat Bridget.

Bridget was definitely better at the flight thing, but Ella had speed. You'd have to check in with them later, considering your class was in the opposite direction.

Hook, seeing you were now alone, casually walks toward you, having popped out of nowhere as you watch Ella and Bridget soar past the windows and eventually disappear. He tilts his head as he looks up at you, trying to read you somehow, from behind. You turn around, jumping back in slight fear and surprise.

"Uhm, hello!-" You awkwardly smile, floating a above the ground, making yourself a foot taller than him. You recognize him, knowing he's a VK.

"What's with the eh-" He looks you up and down, "Floaty thing?"

You glance around and shrug. "I dunno. Just kinda... born like that"

He nods, posing no threat. "Cool"

You subtly raise an eyebrow. "You think?"

"Yeah," He chuckles. "Got any more of that fairy dust?" He asks, referring to the magical golden dust that enchanted its victims with flight.

"Pixie dust," you correct. "But, yeah. Why?"

"You do flying classes?" He asks, a soft expression on his face, one of curiosity, craving adventure.

Your cautious expression quickly fades to one of happiness, a smile curling the corners of your lips up. "For you, I guess"

He smiles, watching as you dig into your pocket and sprinkle him in the glittering gold powder. His feet slowly depart from the floor, his arms quickly reaching out to you in fear.

You jump back to avoid his hooked hand, but realized that this was more like teaching a kid how to ride a bike rather than he wanted to hurt you. You reach for his in-tact hand, pulling him closer to you, laughter escaping your lips as he front flips a few times.

"This isn't funny!"

"Yeah, it is!"

He clings onto you, not liking gravity not pulling him down to the ground.

"What're you so scared for?" You chuckle as you question him. "You a pussy?"

"No!" He quickly pushes away from you, needing to keep his tough guy VK coat on in front of you, reminding himself that you weren't one of his friends. "It's very hard to keep balance!" He exclaims as he falls backward to hang upside down. He flails his arms, returning right side up.

"What's your name?" You ask, stifling a laugh as you watch.

"Hook. James Hook"

"Cause the hook, I'm guessing?"

It'd been a few days since you'd last seen James Hook, your mind constantly trying to find an answer to why he wanted to try the pixie dust and why he spent nearly an hour hanging out with you to try and learn to fly. Maybe he was forming some sort of plan. Maybe you shouldn't speak to him again, maybe he was bad just like the other VKs. Maybe you should stop trusting everyone-

"Hey Y/n," James smiles, appearing from behind you, hand quickly jumping to your shoulder.

You jump, looking back at him as you sit under a tree in the front yard of Merlin's Academy.

"Hey, Hook" You answer, looking back down at your textbook.

He raises an eyebrow, looking down at your spell casting book. "You can call me James"

"Hey, James," you repeat, correcting yourself. "What's up?"

He shrugs. "I was going to ask you that"

He slides down the tree, sitting next to you. "I saw your little stunt earlier in the library." he smiles. "You're a trickster, hm?"

You lightly smile. "Yeah."

"Little sprinkle of that dust and watching people try to fly is amusing, isn't it?"

"Yeah, kinda. Especially when it's assholes" You reply, referring to his VK friends.

He chuckles. "It was funny, really. I like you, you have a sense of humor."

"Y'know," You speak, looking up at him. "My shadow is it's own being, it spies"

He raises an eyebrow. You glance back at the tree you rest your back upon, showing him your shadow standing above you, hands on their hips. He jumps for a moment, looking back at you.

"I don't lie, James" You shrug, watching as the shadow attempts to push you two together. You roll your eyes. "They want us to kiss"

James glances between you and the shadow, face growing red. "I mean, a lot of people call me James-"

"It's not about that." You sigh. "Little mischievous bitch thought you falling into my arms the other day was 'adorable'. You have a crush on me or something, apparently, according to them"

He blinks and shrugs. "I mean, they're not totally wrong." He smiles awkwardly wide, looking for validation. He breaks, disturbed by your silence. "I'd love to be friends with you, at least. You're very intriguing and humorous, and-"

You quickly cut him off. "What? We can't, we can't be friends. You're a VK"

His expression quickly falters as he realizes the predicament.

"But... I shouldn't deny that I feel the same way about you"

He blinks, confused and slightly caught off gaurd. "What are you getting at here?"

"We're star-crossed lovers." You speak dramatically. "We can't be together, yet there's something pulling us together. Even if it's just a silly little crush or infatuation"

He nods. "Can we at least be friends? I promise you, love, I'm not as evil as it seems."

Yeah, friends was an awful word to use when describing you and the infamous James Hook.

Someone call up Anne Marie...

Over the course of the next few months, you and Hook had become true star-crossed lovers like Romeo and Juliet, bound by love, separated by fate. The constellations aligned but the stars between you and James never did.

You wondered why you had to be separated by social norms, why you couldn't be with him because he was a villain. If James was a villain, then you were too for your pranks, there was nothing fair about it.

Even though you'd sucked yourself into a little world of your own, he was there by your side, loving your lips behind closed doors and confined spaces so you wouldn't be caught. God, no one would ever forget it if they found out. A VK and an AK together? The world might as well have ended.

You fly through the forest with James, his fingers tangled in yours as you swiftly pull him along.

"Y/n, slow down!"

"I'm not even going fast, you're going slow!"

[moltengoldveins]

honestly I’d like to see more weird interesting interpretations of the effects a magical or ‘humans are space orcs’ environment could have on a chronically ill character. Like, I have a Ton of random sensitivities that could absolutely screw me over should I end up in Fantasy/Space/Pandora Land, such as:

Mold sensitivity absolutely SCREWING with someone in Bioluminescent Magical Mushroom Land. They walk through the archway or up the path or whatever into the magical tree place and just Immediately pass out. If they’re brought there unconscious, they simply don’t wake up, and eventually when their friends wake up they puzzle together that the illumination for the whole building is just Mushrooms in the Walls.

Someone dealing with a detox issue who currently has a ton of heavy metals in their system walking underneath a floating island being held aloft by magnetism and just bowling over in agony as the current pulls the metals from where their body stowed them into their bloodstream. I’ve sorta had this happen to me, I tried one of those “run a magnetic current thru your body so the metals are dislodged and your body can flush them out” things, but I didn’t know I was dealing with a complete shutdown of the systems that remove toxins from your body (kidney and liver and sweat and more all of it was in complete shutdown I was actively dying dw about it-) so all it did was shoot a bajillion little capsules of poison into my blood with nowhere for them to go and I almost passed out and felt like crud for the next week.

Moon sensitivity being So Much Worse on a planet with multiple moons. People’s hormones and periods and chronic pain spiking randomly with basically no warning or schedule it would SUCK. A character with bipolar is So Much Worse on that planet and none of her alien friends know what’s happening.

Spikes and drops in barometric pressure due to magically summoned storms causing severe chronic pain flare-ups in either the mage summoning the storm or one of their allies whom they didn’t know had joint problems. Same with a planet with a very unstable atmosphere.

Vitamin or nutrient deficiency, or genetic conditions that prevent someone from metabolizing the nutrients in their food and necessitate supplements. This would be HUGE. Can you imagine a human character with anemia, or low vitamin D, or an issue metabolizing folic acid in space? Or in a medieval world that can’t accommodate their needs? Just an alien crew watching in worried confusion as their human slowly grows sluggish, twitchy, forgetful and snappish during an unexpected long haul to a distant outpost. When asked what’s wrong, they say they’re fine, or that their nutrient intake has just been low recently, but they’ve been eating the same things they always have. The ship medic does a brain scan and realizes their grey matter is cannibalizing itself, and he can’t figure out why. The human stops exercising, and when they do, one of their crew mates notices they aren’t sweating anymore. One day they run into the room of another crewmate with a padded floor nest, curl themselves into it, manage to stammer out a “don’t worry, don’t tell others. I’m ok” before they start thrashing. Finally they arrive on base and the human medic is like “Oh dang. You didn’t refill your folinic supplements before you came here did you? Dang. we’re gonna need to keep you on a higher dose for a bit to try to make sure your immune and detox systems don’t crash. How bad were the seizures?” and every alien in the crew is Horrified.

Someone who needs assistive devices but only occasionally has a bad day halfway through the Magic Quest and realizes in horror that they forgot their cane/ can’t currently access their chair. Someone who takes muscle relaxers or painkillers thrice or so a month having a huge flare-up and being immobile for an entire day while rushing to Stop The Evil Lord.

Someone who needs excess oxygen always walking around in an atmospheric suit, even in human-friendly atmospheres, because they’re self-conscious about the breathing tube.

Someone with POTS trying to keep their salt intake up in fantasy medieval Europe where salt is tricky to get, or a space setting where salt is a minor poison to most species.

[waddleonmywaywardducks]

HEKATE MASTER POST

(This is one big info post on Hekate, all sources are linked (hekates name) as well as upg post. I will mark which one is which dw. More will be added to the upg and info list and if you have any other suggestions on what I can put there feel free to dm me)

I started to worship Hekate immediately once I moved out of my mother house. I wasn't really allowed to practice at her house so with me finally being free I wanted to get all into it, Hekate showed me where to go. I've been under hekates wing for about a year now and I've learned so much from her and she's opened so many doors! I really hope this post does the same for future Hekate worshippers!!

WHO IS HEKATE?

Hekate is a goddess of Greek mythology. She is the goddess of witchcraft, necromancy, liminal spaces, doorways, crossroads, good and evil. She is associated with the moon, liminal spaces, crossroads, keys, doorways, creatures of the night, dogs, bloodhounds, the night, darkness.

She is the daughter of Perses and Asteria, making her the granddaughter of the Titans Phoebe and Coeus. Euripides, on the other hand, mentions her mother is Leto. Other writers claim her as the daughter of Zeus and Demeter, Aristaion or Night. The goddess was frequently associated with Demeter and even assimilated to her in some cults. It is known that Zeus favored Hekate and gifted her land, sea, and sky, making her the goddess of boundaries.

HEKATES ROLE

Hekate became a household and protective goddess in the 5th century BC. She had cults closely tied to Persephone and Demeter. Rituals done for specificly her were the supper of Hekate: offerings given at crossroads as a sort of libation. The offerer would give offerings of illuminated cakes, meat, sacrifices of puppies, garlic, eggs, water, and frankincense. After the offering was given the offerer will walk away from the crossroads and not look back, as it was said if you looked back spirits would follow you home.

As a house hold goddess, she was given shrines or altars in doorways, it was said that this kept unwanted guest and spirits away. She was also given altars near the hearth of the home as protection.

UPG

Hekate shows herself as a tall hooded figure with chains around her body. She takes her work very seriously and expects her followers to as well.

Some workings that she's helped me with are:

- road opener spells

- spell workings in general

- baneful wards

- lunar magic

Some offerings that I like to give:

- black things (nail polish, necklaces)

- eggs

- wine

- olive oil

- frankincense

- water

UPG/INFO POSTS

- Hekate fact list (info post)

- subtle offerings to Hekate (UPG post)

-hekate reading list (info post)

- Hekate info post (info post)

- grounding with Hekate (UPG post??)

[astral--horrorshow]

Around-The-Clock Shadows

Platonic Yandere ROTTMNT x Reader

Info: This will be a full-length fic including multiple ROTTMNT characters, the main storyline revolves around the Mad Dogs.

Fic Summary: You sure are likeable, aren't you?

《Chapter 1》

Chapter 2: Juice-Induced Short-Circuit

Characters: Donnie, Leo, Raph, Mikey

A/N: Chapter 2 is here! I'm going to try to write a bit more to get chapters out faster, (dw i'm not burning myself out, i literally sit around at home most days) so ya'll have that to look forwards to!

Tbh I did my most productive writing while listening to video game fan music, maybe it just has magical tendencies from good it is.

If you want to be added to a taglist, just say the word! If you want to draw fanart or make anything based off of this, I would be literally honored. Please don't be shy, I will love whatever you make! If you have any questions about the fic, feel free to ask!

TW: Stalking, kidnapping plans, toxic relationships, Donnie has a bit of an ego, ruining of clothing

I do not condone any of the behaviors found or done in this fic. This story is purely for entertainment purposes. If you or someone you know is being treated like this, please contact the authorities.

Please Reblog writer's work!

Chapter Summary: Donnie gets rid of a tracker in a way that Leo doesn't like very much, and Raph goes over a plan with his brothers.

Word Count: 1176

☆~☆~☆

"Don't let me hear the robins sing above,

What good's their song if I've no one to love?"

You leaned your head back against the porcelain of the bathtub, watching the steam from the water curl up towards the ceiling. The silky-double vocals of Leslie Gore crept beneath the door and echoed throughout the tiled bathroom.

You leaned forwards and pulled the plug to the drain, watching the water swirl into the pipes.

"Don't let that dreamy moon come out, come out tonight,"

You lifted the needle off of the record, slipping it back into its case and strolling back to your bedroom. You snuggled under the warm covers, your wet hair dampening the pillow. Your eyelids were getting heavier with each second, warm water always did make you sleepy.

A hand landed on the outdoor windowsill, pulling the body attached to it upwards, revealing Donatello. He froze for a moment when you stirred in your sleep, but relaxed again when you merely turned your sleeping face to the wall.

Donnie pulled open your window, and slipped inside almost silently. He scanned around the room, before the spot of red light he was looking for pulled him to the jacket it was coming from.

He plucked the tracker the Purple Dragons had planted and glared at it with distaste. How dare they disrespect your privacy like that? He knew that they didn't care about you, not like he did. He wants to protect you, they want to use you. He wouldn't let that happen, over his dead body. Donnie's trackers are for protection purposes, so you need them. You need him, you need the rest of your new family to protect you from people like Kendra.

Now, what to do with the tracker? He obviously couldn't bring it back to the Lair, but he didn't want to leave it on you. He couldn't place it somewhere else, there were still things to prepare for your arrival and they would still see you at school, much to his displeasure. He thought it over, finding no good options even within the deepest depths of his intellect.

Suddenly, he thought of the most intelligent idea. He would spill something on the jacket, so you would throw it in the wash! The tracker would be destroyed! Those horrible, deceiving nerds wouldn't suspect a thing! He applauded himself in his mind, basking in his own intellect.

He was so busy praising himself in his mind that he didn't notice the electric blue portal materializing out of thin air behind him until Leo was right behind him. Donnie jumped nearly a mile out of his skin when Leo's hand landed on his shoulder.

He jerked around, expecting you to have woken up somehow and discovered his presence, but deflated when he saw that it was just his brother, and glared at him.

"What are you doing here, Leo?" Donnie said, crossing his arms with an annoyed look on his face. He could believe that his brother could do what he was doing, but he really wished he wouldn't.

"I'm visiting, of course," Leonardo flipped the ends of his bandana over his shoulder like it was hair, "Also, Raph sent me to look for you. You didn't come back after you left."

"That's none of your business."

"I think it is. If you're here, then it's all our business."

"You'll just do something rash."

Leo put on a half-mocking, half-serious pout, "Nuh-uh!"

"Scoff."

"If you don't tell me, I'll tell Raph and Mikey something is wrong."

Donatello clenched his fists and teeth, glaring even deeper at Leo. "Fine. The Purple Dragons placed a tracker on them, and I'm going to get rid of it."

Leonardo brought a hand up to his chest and gasped dramatically like a woman in a black-and-white movie, his eyes widening. "No!" He said it less like an exclamation, and more like a woman gossiping with her friends.

"Yes. Like I said, I'm going to get rid of it. Now go away."

Leo sassily put a hand on his hip, "No. I'm going to stay here and look after them."

"Fine," Donnie snapped, "But if you wake them up, you're going to regret it."

He walked to the kitchen, taking a carton of juice out of the fridge before returning.

Upon re-entering the bedroom, Donnie gritted his teeth yet again upon seeing him sit on the edge of your bed, his three-fingered hand gently petting the top of your head.

“What are you doing? Get off of there before you wake them up!” Leo pouted at his brother’s demand, but sat up anyway. He cocked his head in curiosity upon seeing the juice in Donnie’s hand.

“Juice?”

“Yes. This is how I’m going to get rid of that awful tracker.”

Leo launched forwards, attempting to grab the juice. “Don’t do that! You’re going to ruin a perfectly good jacket!”

Donatello jerked his hand back before Leo could grab it. “The whole point is that they’re going to wash it, dumb-dumb.” Upon hearing his brother’s plan, Leo didn’t try to grab the juice anymore, but put a hand on his hip again. “And what happens if it stains?”

“I’ll buy them another one,” Donnie turned back to the jacket, screwing the cap open.

Leonardo made no further attempt to stop his brother, but looked away as Donnie poured the liquid over the fabric. In his refusal to watch him disfigure clothing, he looked over to you, still sleeping soundly even with all the noise they were both making. You really were a deep sleeper, how cute.

“Done,” Donnie announced, interrupting Leo’s thoughts. He turned back to him, trying not to focus on the stained fabric on a hanger behind him. “Let’s just go,” Leo said, sulkily. He didn’t want to leave you so soon, but he couldn’t stand another minute in the awkwardness of the moment. They both walked to the kitchen, checking on you one last time to make sure you were still sleeping soundly. Donnie put the juice back in the fridge, then stepped into Leo’s portal.

☆~☆~☆

The Turtle Tank sped throughout the backstreets of New York City, leaving scattered papers and humans in its wake. Raphael pulled the tank into an isolated alleyway, beckoning his brothers to join in a circle.

"Okay," Raph said, putting his arms on the backs of Leo and Mikey, who were next to him in the circle, "We have everything prepared? Donnie, you have the tranq gun?"

"Of course I do, Raph," Donnie said with a slightly exasperated tone, "We've been over this."

"Okay, fine. Everyone knows the plan, right? We sneak in, get them, and take them home, like a boss!" Upon saying his catchphrase, Raph pumped his fist in the air, hyped up.

His energy spread to his younger brothers, and they put in their words of excitment and encouragement. Raph drove the vehicle out of the alleyway, and sped towards your home.

☆~☆~☆

A/N: Apologies if this chapter drags on a bit! I wanted to focus more on staying on one scene because of all the jumping back and forth in the first chapter! Also sorry that Raph and Mikey aren't very active in the story right now! They'll be a lot more starting in chapter 3! The first two chapters are more focused on the stalking aspect, which I tend to assign to Leo and Donnie. Raph and Mikey are more caretaker-esque, which you'll definently see very soon!

Taglist <3: @yandere-toons @yanteetle @ssak-i @oleander-nin @averagerottmntsimp

[bonefall]

Sorry, I'm a fucking idiot but what's Shadowsight's relationship with the Dakr Forest Peeps??? Somehow Don't know how to search properly 😭😭😭

OH dw djrhddj it's kind of an inside joke that just sorta happened based on this one scene

Here, I am handing you a bouquet of WIP material.

PREVIOUS CONTEXT:

In BB, Bristlefrost dies VERY early on. She is executed publically by the Impostor. She is a ghost for most of TBC.

Shadowsight has epilepsy, and since his birth in Heartstar's Rise, has had a really bad relationship with death and the idea of needing to "make his life worth it."

He's struck by lightning in early TBC, giving him a glowing blue scar that lights up his ear like radio antennae. This is a "gift" from Ashfur, essentially making Shadowsight a prophet-level interpreter. VERY powerful gift.

All Dark Forest residents manifest a "Land Mar" in the forest. An evil magic place based on the worst moment of their lives. If you live here long enough that it becomes home, you get one.

Anyway, cut ahead to the wip in question where the joke comes from;

Confronting the Impostor in the Dark Forest

Like canon, it is decided that Ashfur needs to be dealt with. He's escaped into the Dark Forest and it's not known what's happened with StarClan.

They just know that Ashfur is FREAKISHLY powerful and it's not known why. StarClan warriors can do many wonderful things, but possession? Calling down a lightning bolt to make a blessing?

The Clans are more concerned about StarClan than the dark forest though, and not super willing to stick their necks out to fight for... Hell. Or the soul of Bramblestar.

But Squirrelflight, in spite of EVERYTHING, argues passionately that they NEED to save her ex-mate. No man left behind means him too.

But I'm not sure if I'm going to have Shadowsight leave and re-enter the DF this time around, to go fetch these reinforcements, because I have a better idea.

So INSTEAD of escaping as Rootspring gets captured, Shadowsight also gets trapped. He's able to avoid capture, but injured, and not knowing how he's going to save everyone without reinforcements.

He manages to drag himself away where he finds a cave. It's the land mar of Ravenwing, the unfairly damned Cleric of ThunderClan... and he intentionally never seeks visitors. He has no idea what's going on out there with Ashfur. Man literally lives under a rock.

But Shadowsight is a young lad and he's injured. He needs help, so, he brings him deep into his cave to patch him up. That's where they have a little chat.

It's about expectations. What people want from you, vs the right thing to do. Ravenwing interpreted a sign from StarClan incorrectly, and three children died because of him. He thought he was doing what they wanted... but even if they did, it was an AWFUL thing to want.

And so he regrets it deeply. Even if it WAS their will, he should have had the spine to stand against it.

And then the subject turns around to Ashfur, Shadowsight sharing how he listened to him because he was a StarClan warrior, even against his instincts, how he feels responsible for this mess.

And yet.. how good it felt. How terrified he is that even if he beats him, he'll go back to living without him. Ashfur makes him special, this GIFT makes him special.

And how will anyone ever forgive him? So many people are dead because of him. Cousin Strikestone is dead because of him. All he ever wanted to do was be useful, but now his life is a net negative.

I plan to trim this down to be shorter and more "focused," but I do want to try and set up Shadowsight's feelings before the Final Battle in some other way.

Anyway, Ravenwing reveals that the Special Power of his Land Mar is that HE can send omens from the comfort of his own cave, very easily. With the power of his Land Mar and the Gift that Shadowsight still has, they're able to send a message to the Mortal Plane.

"STUCK IN DARK FOREST ASHFUR BAD SEND HELP"

I think it'll work better than the several chapters of arguing canon gave us, widely considered to be super frustrating. Just let Shadowsight see the "best hits" from Ravenwing's cave, like Squirrelflight’s Speech.

If I don't use the Land Mar idea, then Rootspring will break out of jail with the help of Hawkfrost's half-ghost and go get help.

Anyway. The joke

Shadowsight keeps getting put in the path of demons who aren't evil and angels who aren't good

So based on the Ravenwing Scene (which I've mentioned before but without much detail iirc) it just became a joke that people like talking to Shadowsight lmao

He'll take 2 steps and a new demon is like "oh i need to protect this boy"

Or suddenly traumadump on him

Or both

[katiekatdragon27]

Does anyone still care about this idea? No? Well I don't care you get more stuff anyway.

I am working on the playing cards dw, but this has been sitting in my gallery for months and I wanted to get it done.

(It is HIGHLY RECOMENDED that you read the first part of this au story thing. It provides a lot of context for the world and some other characters that are mentioned here.)

Also some updates on that: This story is now called "Rayman: The Sacred Dream" and it is the concepts for a possible fangame. If people show genuine interest in these characters or this Rayman prequal's story, PLEASE let me know. I would love to construct a team to make this idea a reality.

Anyways: To the character cards!!! (Please read below I worked hard on the ref sheets)

Xavior the Athletic Monk:

Xavior is a teensy who utilizes a special kind of elemental magic over anything else. Choosing to hit hard and dodge over magic blasts, he has learned to manipulate the magic inside his own body to shapeshift into a gelatinous water version of himself. Ze is incredibly resilient and moldable too, able to fit through almost any space and dodge most attacks with ease. He is one of Umber's closest friends. They and he often spar to release energy and get better at combat in general. Ze is also very kind, but lacks a filter, so often comes off as rude unintentionally.

Fier the Furious Paladen:

Fier is a teensy with fire in his heart. Literally. Being a resident of Gourmand Land, they have never turned down a hearty meal, especially if it's spicy. His love for spice was so high that it turned his teal skin yellow, making him look the way he does now. They're personality is no less spicy. He is a hot head with a stubborn thought process. They swing first and questions people after, often challenging Aurthr for leadership of the group. He is not blessed by Polokus, but he does have some sort of deity watching him. It's rumored one of the four wild kings has given him their blessing. He does make a banger meal though, so he is allowed to stick around.

Ellixer the Mysterious Cleric:

No one knows Ellixer's story, nor do they ever share it themselves. They are the only naturally yellow teensy of the Glade, with has made them a puzzlement for most who come across them. They are a very talented magic user, but it can only be used for good (such as healing and boosts). Their inability for proper fighting has made them an easy target for capture, but to their captor's surprise, they always escape undetected. Some even assume that they are Polokus themselves, but they deny it. However, Ellixer did manage to help Aurthr with his bubble magic, so they're not beating the allegations.

Zoron the Cursed Druid:

Zoron was not always the old grump he is now. There was a time where he was a thriving showman, bringing the magic of snow and combat to the hot climates of the Glade. His best clients were the minotaurs, a kind group of hell-dwellers just wanting to cool down and have a good spar. However, while traveling to one of his events, he got into a fight with a mother frostbite, who lost her life in the battle. From that day on, Zoron had been cursed with not only her primal hunger, but the ability to turn into any creature he has fought before (which has been a lot). He was also burdened with her kits, although this is no bother to him now. After learning how to control his hunger through Soria, he's been staying isolated in caves, not wanting to hurt anyone else.

Pyren the Rouge Artificer:

Pyren is one of the strangest teensies around. Whereas most are born with large amounts of magic, Pyren was born with none. This lack of magic has made his life incredibly hard, making it almost impossible to properly bond with his peers and defend himself alone. As a result, he started utilizing his real talent, his brain. Learning that plums are quite flammable and explosive, he learned to harness their power into artillery like bombs and makeshift guns. He also sells these weapons to others, good and bad, who also struggle with no magic or are willing to pay the pretty gem. However, insecurity leads people down dark paths, so when a large, dark-hearted nightmare strikes a deal with Pyren for him get magic in exchange for his loyalty, he becomes his biggest weaponsmith.

And with that, the cast has been fully shared! Yes, there is going to be like 10 main characters in this, but some are more main than others lol. If anyone has any questions at all, I will be more than happy to answer.

Thank you for all the support and have a wonderful afternoon!

[warlocks-and-phoenixes]

A while ago the discord got me thinking about Vincent. So naturally that concluded in me making a whole shiny new partially-canon-compliant backstory for him

So, to begin, I was previously considering making him East Asian (specifically Korean). I honestly can’t explain why but I feel like it’d be cool if he was, and it’d also be nice to have an asian character who wasn’t a meif’wa. However…all of east asia is in the region of Jin’tal, and geographically, that’d be like having a Mayan character in Eastern Europe in the 12th century. So…how does that happen is a question I had been pondering. But then the beloveds gave me the idea of Vincent being much older. Older enough to…well you’ll see.

Background: meif’wa are from Jin’tal, but they’re in Ru’aun and Tu’la because over the century preceding MCD there was an exodus driven by societal strife. Thousands went across the sea and it became the first time in history that a Jin’tali diaspora settled in the eastern hemisphere. That was a good couple centuries before reliable charting of the globe came to be, and even more before transit and trade between the hemispheres became common.

Okay. There’s some worldbuilding. Now, there’s one exception to this isolation: Kulzak Fucking Aran’ask™️

AKA, the guy with magic that can cause him to disappear for several months and then you find out the man was waltzing around a continent that your whole society didn’t know existed. So…what if, in this time 300 years before the meif’wa exodus, in the equivalent of the 6th century, one of two things happened. Either a force out of their control (such as magic or a very very bad storm) sent the DWs really, really, really far off course, OR Kulzak & Co decided “what could go wrong” and let the Fates take the wheel. No matter how, they wind up in Fantasy Korea.

[note: kulzak’s main magical ability is teleportation, except most of the time, he’s not in control of where he goes. He wanders, and lets the world decide where to take him. And, logically, there’s nothing keeping him within the bounds of what’s known by his own society]

So while these strangely dressed and stranger-looking people are turning heads in the Fantasy Three Kingdoms, they meet a few people who they actually befriend. Two of these were the parents of Kwan Hae-sang. Or, Vincent Kwan. At this time he’s a little kid—as in, no older than 4—and these locals help the Ru’aunians find their way home. Maybe those few dozen Jin’tali were just as adventurous as Kulzak, or maybe they didn’t have much to their names in their homeland, but for whatever reason they went along to the unknown east with strangers. Vincent’s father, Kwan Ri-yeon, specifically had been a fisherman; he knew the ocean of the west better than anyone, and he spent the rest of his own life as Kulzak’s right-hand man.

This small group of strangers who were now in a strange land themselves were one of the reasons the divine warriors decided to erect their own city on a protected island. This island was where Vincent grew up. (His birth name was Hae-sang, but he went by Vincent his whole life to fit in with the melting pot city mostly comprised of european-Ru’aun and mediterranean/arabian-Tu’la.)

As Vincent grew up, his family were always close to the warriors. He joined the city’s elite Guard; the force under Sir Esmound’s command. Around then, or when he’s between 16-18, is when the War of the Magi begins.

In the Guard, Vincent grew close to a man who technically outranked him, but who nevertheless became the brother he’d never had. Esmound’s personal apprentice, Enki’s apprentice’s brother, an admirer of the Six Warriors, and a stranger to this world in his own right. A man named Xavier.

They became like brothers for the rest of Vincent’s life in the grand city. I’m not sure exactly how Vincent dies in this scenario, but it’s after the War of the Magi has ended, meaning he’s now known Xavier for at least 16 years, likely closer to 20. (Also, his mother died because of the war, and that caused Vincent and Ri-yeon to drift apart. The last time they saw each other was when Kulzak and Enki left the island and all of Kulzak’s sailing crew, his first mate included, went with them.)

But, in whatever scenario it was, Xavier was definitely present. Perhaps the still-experimental magic of the resurrection messed with Vincent’s brain and mixed his memories around, making him think it was Xavier who had killed him. OH. Sadder idea. Mercy kill. [in discord at the time we had just previously been talking about this subject]

Then, Vincent became one of the very first Shadow Knights. At this point, the Nether is little more than a barren waste, and the Shadow Lord is still learning the extent of its newfound power over souls lost in transition. Also at this point, the Nether Portal isn’t established, and so there isn’t a way back to the Overworld for the next…let’s say, 100-150ish years. Thus, portal isn’t opened until well after Irene’s departure from the world. There are only two people still alive by then whom she or Vincent knew: Xavier and Hyria. Siblings, and elves, and each left with a duty by Irene.

To Hyria, she gave the staff that would summon her back to their realm; the world could not know this staff existed lest it be used for evil, and so Hyria retired to the forest she and Irene planted, where it would be safe.

To Xavier, meanwhile, Esmound’s apprentice had succeeded him as protector of this city. While the Divine Warriors together were seen as the leaders of the island since its discovery, Irene acted as the city’s de-facto lord. A role she entrusted to Xavier in her absence.

Irene disappeared, Hyria left, Xavier was lord of the grand city, and many decades later Vincent was one of the first Shadow Knights to feel the sun’s light again. With the portal, the Shadow Lord instituted a new law: all Knights had to find whoever their loyalty previously belonged to, and kill them in the name of their new Lord. This was how they proved their loyalty to the SL, and in return earned their place immortally in the army destined for vengeful greatness.

Xavier in his own right did many things of note in the years between Irene and his death, all across Ru’aun. But then Vincent was sent after him. He hunted him down on the island; he believed Xavier had killed him, and he mistook the city’s decline as being caused not by the loss of Irene, but by the gain of him and his lordship; clearly he hadn’t been the man Vincent thought he was. Xavier had murdered him and was now killing their home too.

To Ru’aun, Xavier the Admirer was a Divine Warrior by association; he carried on the Protector’s legacy, solidified Irene’s Lordship and Guard systems, founded the first incarnation of the Jury of Nine, and did his best to lead the island despite its slow dissolution in the absence of the people who’d attracted its inhabitants there. In Vincent’s memory, he was a betrayer who the region falsely remembered for deeds he never saw, and a man who he didn’t have any remorse in killing because he was a corrupt, sorry excuse for their Lady’s successor.

The idea of Shadow Knights was still in its infancy during Vincent’s time. The concept was there, but so were many flaws yet to be ironed out. Vincent still possessed his many good memories of the Divine Warriors, and his small part in fighting the Magi War. The Calling is not as overwhelmingly strong after an SK’s immortality has been earned, because as far as the magic is concerned, they’ve already proven their loyalty. Vincent learned how to deal with the remainder of its pull, and he simply…never returned to the portal.

After the destruction caused by Xavier’s murder, the question of his succession, and other factors against it as well, the city on the island soon became nothing but forgotten ruins. 300 years later, Vincent found himself as a guard of a town named New Meteli.

[childofsardior]

What is the story about how Bowser adopted Ludwig (sorry about the other asks I didn't know they were personal 😢 I'm new to Tumblr)

Heya!

DW for the uncomfortable past asks, the important is that now it’s all clear :3

Okay so, this is actually the last ask in my inbox! I kept it as the last one since I needed some time to prepare a good answer. Here we go!

I’ll now tell you the story about how Ludwig and his six siblings at the time were adopted by the King of the Koopas, becoming sort of non-hereditary Princes of the Royal Family.

*WARNING! The following piece contains a few SPOILERS from the AU Story and Characters I am working on ;^;*

*DISCLAIMER* - Since this story is still WIP, everything I'm going to tell you now could change in the future! Maybe some details will change, maybe the full story will be rewritten, who knows! So, for now, I'm writing this piece as my "current HC for my AU in august 2024".

"A young-adult Tarrasquin named Bowser Koopa ruled over the Dark Lands. He had been raised by Magikoopas, away from his parents, following the Empereor's tradition. At a certain time in his life, Bowser started to feel his own castle was too empty. Kamek, his first counselor and caretaker, suggested looking for an heir - in this way, Bowser could have both strengthened his domain and enjoyed the joy of parenthood, growing in responsibility and maturity.

But how could he obtain a dragon-turtle cub? It was unlikely for the Stork Adoption Center to have Royal-Koopas as an adoptable orphan, being the species so rare and almost extinct. Kamek suggested the young King to ask around the Kingdom for a donor that could give him an egg; being so loved and charismatic among his people, it should have been a breeze to find some volunteers! But Bowser didn't want a random Koopa to mother his heir. He wanted a strong someone! Someone who was able to match the King's power, who could have been a good and mighty parent for their kid! So he opened a sort of... competition.

All around the Dark Lands arrived an announcement: anyone who considered themselves to be able to give the King a dignified heir could try confronting him in a duel first. If she could match the Royal Koopa in a fight, she could have had the privilege of becoming the mother of a Koopa Prince, along with living at the Royal Palace as an aristocrat (since Bowser's heart was already taken by the Princess of Mushroom Kingdom at that time, he didn't offer an actual marriage, but an important position and a royal title instead) and making a wish to the King - whatever she wanted, as long as the monarch could make it happen without going against his very own interests.

Some Koopas among the army, civilians, and even outside the Dark Lands came to fight Bowser. Some of them were strong, but not strong enough. And one day, one Royal Koopa showed up. She was different from any kind of Tarrasquin Kamek had served before. She had five fingers per hand, a crystalline shell, and her hair could change color along with her mood - and powers. She introduced herself as "Bowenn", the Magical-Fire, and signed for the fight with Bowser.

But Bowser knew her already - he had met her years and years ago, in the Mushroom Kingdom, as the adoptive sister of Princess Toadstool herself, and under a different name... but this is another story.

Bowenn came in with seven hatchlings. The older one was almost 10, and the younger one was around 4. All of them had different shell colors and some quirks - and they all were quite afraid of the King of the Koopas. They all watched their mother brawling with the young King, muscle against muscle and fire against fire - in the end, Bowser was the one raising the white flag.

Bowser offered the colorful Tarrasquin and her kids some rooms at the castle for some time. They started living there for a while, and after some time Bowenn gave the King his desired egg - an egg with a ruby-red shell, instead of the usual ash-black of Vulcanic Tarrasquins ones. Bowenn was still thinking about her *wish*, and what to choose about staying at the castle or not - technically, only she, as the winner of the match, would have been allowed there, not her children. She could have just refused to, but she actually wanted to meet and help raise her 8th kid.

But then something... happened.

Bowenn suddenly knew something horrible was going to happen, soon. She secretly asked for an audience with the King in the middle of the night, claiming she was ready to wish for something.

She wished for the King to adopt her kids once she was gone. Bowser, who had already started growing fond of the little, colorful dragon-turtles, accepted her wish without questions. Then he asked her something, but she said it was too late, and she could not.

That very night, a sudden series of explosions shook the castle, destroying a portion of it; they were under attack! But the enemies could not be found, nor seen, and the whole royal palace was panicking trying to fight an invisible foe. After some time, after the end of the attack, after the fog and smoke dissolved... Bowenn was no more.

She had... disappeared, without a trace.

Bowser sent airships in the whole Dark Lands and over and looked for her nonstop for weeks. But Bowenn was nowhere to be found, just as the enemies that attacked during the night.

Since that day, Bowser has taken care of her kids as if they were his. He became attached to them all in a short time, even if suddenly parenting 7-and-almost-8 kids wasn't exactly easy, especially since these kids were quite scared of him at first and still traumatized by their mother's disappearance. But they slowly started to accept him as their new caretaker after some time - and call the palace their new "home". After a while, they even called themselves the "Koopalings" as a tribute to Bowser Koopa and to their new family name.

Then Bowser's official Heir hatched - "Junior" was all that could come to the King's mind when he saw the tiny hatchling looking so much like him - and grew together with the others. Bowser Junior has some privileges being the King's biological son and official Heir, but the others are still considered "princes" and "royalty" among the Dark Lands. The older ones had a harder time accepting Bowser as their new father - especially Ludwig and Roy - while the younger ones such as Larry adapted without much trouble. Nowadays, some of them even forget about being adopted from time to time."

[aliensamba]

Bridgerton: The Duke and I

I have never been a man that much enjoyed flirting, or chatting, or, indeed, talking at all. But with Daphne… Miss Bridgerton… conversation has always been easy. Her laughter brings me joy. To meet a beautiful woman is one thing, but to meet your best friend in the most beautiful of women is something entirely apart.

[inseasofgreen]

Hi, there! I'll probably get to your ask later tonight, but in the meantime, since I remember Sciosa (pardon any poor spelling) is an elf, how do elves work in your world? How do they interact with other folk?

Heyo!

You got her name right dw!! Sciosa's mother is Zaentiraeal, which is the elven race of the Nite Region, her dad is something else so we won't get into that right now lol. So she's technically a half elf, which I'll get more into later!

So the Zaentiraeal are characterized with pointed ears and unnaturally colored eyes, some time's they'll have light hair ranging from pure white to a very light blonde but most times the quickest tell tale sign is their ears and eyes.

Their homeland, Zenier. is a land were magic quite literally is in the world around them, giving the lands a more cool toned hue than what we usually see in nature. It's towers are also some of the highest buildings in the Nite Region, and possibly even Nyrus as a whole. The Zaentiraeal are said to have been born by the gods themselves, and seeing as their high priestesses commune with the gods daily it's not too far fetch to believe that.

The Zaentiraeal also have an easier time tapping into magic. While other mortals either learn from schools or a mentor, Zaentiraeal just have the ability to wield magic, straight outta the womb too. Which actually brings us to Zaenri, the half elfs. Magic isn't something that can be easily be controlled and can in fact kill the one wielding it if they don't have the magical wealth (how much magic a mortal has at whim, which can be slowly built up over time or simply born with it) or enough skill.

Pregnancy and Death TW: So with that being said, Zaenri's aren't a common occurrence, even more so are those who's mother survived the pregnancy. When the baby becomes more powerful than it's mother, the magic will attack the mother in the same way it would attack it's wielder if they weren't strong enough to control it. So most the Zaentiraeal tend to be very mindful of who they marry and have children with. Though sometimes love wins over logic, and ends with the death of the mother, and sometimes the child if the proper procedures aren't taken to rescue the child. TW over

Though the Zaentiraeal call Zenier home, many of them have never stepped foot in the holy land. Zaentiraeal live all over Nyrus, and most times are welcomed the same as everyone else. The biggest exception being Vultis. Zaentiraeal who where living in Vultis during the rebellion and crowning of the usurper quickly found themselves as second class citizens. Though, there are a higher number of Zaenari in Vultis, many of them being Zrato's and having the ability to ride dragons. Though those Zaenari tend to not be as powerful magic wise, simply because it's frowned upon and they don't wish to cause any more attention to themselves than they already have.

Touching on one last thing, The Zaentiraeal aren't really like Tolkien elves or even DnD elves, as in they're don't have a limited number of souls, or are more attune with nature, etc. But they do tend to live a longer live than others, most of them living well into their late 200s, they have their mother tongue, and are more likely to take another Zaentiraeal's word over other mortals. There's a sense of kinship with each other that most other mortals don't have.

oof, this got long. but I finally got to share some Zaentiraeal lore! I feel like I yap more about the Zrato than the Zaentiraeal, so this was a nice change.

[fatuismooches]

omg omg omg i’m brainrotting so hard abt arlecchino rn im so sorry if you’ve already been sent smtg similar but hear me out: childhood friends to lovers w the one and only knave <33

growing up w her in the house of the hearth, ur the only person she has a soft spot for <33 even when she began ascending the ranks of the fatui u know she’d always come back to you <33 i’m entering delulu land but im LICHERALLY going crazy over the idea that the reason arlie killed the previous knave was because they threatened you and she was not having that dgjskdjdjd im scratching clawing at the walls of my enclosure

BONUS: whenever u show up to fontaine’s hearth all the kids get very very excited bcos they’re going to be able to break SO many rules and arlie will mostly let it slide since she’s just so damn weak for you <33 all u hv to do is bat ur pretty lashes a little and she’s folding like a wet paper towel (“another story surely won’t hurt the children 🥺🥺 please?” “………fine”) one of the kids accidentally called you ‘mother’ once in front of her and her brain did a hard system reset for like 5 entire minutes LMFAO lyney is SO tempted to set up his idiot pining father with a special in-house magic show but lynette is a 100% sure arlecchino would straight up murder him if he tried (though she does agree with her brother in that father should just confess to you, because there’s no way you would ever say anything other than i love you too)

AHHMAKAONDW DW ANON I TOO AM BRAINROTTING HARD ABOUT ARLECCHINO AND I ADORE THIS HAHAHA CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS ONE OF MY FAV TROPES EVER 🤭 ooohhhh im words i cant describe rn…

Going to the House of Hearth and seeing shes always the quiet, solitary, speak to no one kid and your interest is piqued right away!! Yeah she ignores you for a while but you keep following after her so earnestly! On the missions, during playtime, during mealtime when she leaves to eat somewhere by herself but somehow you find her anyway… how can she not start to warm up to you? :( slowly but surely that cold mask of hers starts to melt just a tiny bit… you two are inseparable at that point, she refuses to work with anyone else <3 Arlie is… s-s-soft for you 🥺

AND UGHHHH her not forgetting about you even when she’s a higher-up, and a Harbinger 🤭 everyday, when she’s learning to adjust to her new duties, learning to deal with more incompetent people by the day… Arlie can just come back and rest her head on your shoulder and relax ❤️ (lmao regardless if it’s the former Knave or a random person they will be GONE hehe 😈😈)

AHHHH ANON THE BONUS IS MAKING ME GO CRAZYYY AJAIAIBDW I WOULD ADOPT THOSE BABIES IN A HEARTBEAT, THEY LITERALLY GET SO EXCITED BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS WHEN THEY HEAR THAT YOURE COMING!!! Help I would so be the parent who lets them break rules (within reason of course)!!! We can stay up past your bedtime!! Pillow fights and spooky stories and everything!! We can bake cookies together and playfully fight!! There are so much possibilities omg and Arlie is just like 🧍‍♀️yea there’s no way she would let this happen usually but,, sigh, the kids are literally beaming in happiness and crowding you and you’re laughing and smiling and looking so soft,, so fine, she’ll let it slide. But don’t expect her to join! (She’ll pop up around dinner time ❤️) (you *may* get her to join you for that one last story time, but it’s a very big *maybe*)

THE CHILDREN CALLING YOU MOTHER AHIAIVFW YESSS YESSS like bro you just give off motherly and parental energy to them, you are the parent they never had :( I always hc Arlie’s partner as being hella overprotective of their kids, like they are NOT getting hurt on your watch!! Making them separate meals if the regular food isn’t to their fancy, making sure their clothes don’t have holes in them, tucking them into bed and all :( Please the child would act as if they just said something normal and you’re just smiling really hard and blushing a lil bit and Arlecchino is just like 😐 outwardly but inside her heart is racing a bit ANISJAIAI. Like it just clicks for her that you’re really so wonderful… omfg she loves you so much.

And omg omg I would sooo love to be around baby Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet, they deserve the whole WORLD… you would clap and be surprised when they come home and show you all the new tricks they learned… you’d be their willing member from the audience to join them!! And Freminet, he’s a shy baby so you would just read him stories and help him with the big words :( you’d help him find more mechanical stuff to play around with and fix! And although Arlie doesn’t like when kids cry… the kids love you because they can cry into your arms and you won’t tell a soul 🥺

HAHAHA LYNEY BEING HIS FATHER’S WINGMAN 😭😭 he would so do it but Lynette reminds him every time that his life would be FORFEIT if he ever tried doing such a thing! Lyney is still thinking about it though 🤔, even the younger kids have caught onto Father’s pining for you! Like bro… Arlie, it is so freaking obvious how much you two like each other just kiss already smh (the kids have bets on who will confess first 🤭)

[johannesviii]

ok so ABOUT THE DW MAGIC SETS I have this problem. I seriously really want to have the Twelfth Doctor - Clara commander combination because I feel like it would go really hard. But I also REALLY love the eleventh doctor (he was my first and i love him) and I kinda want the deck with him and Ten for entirely fangirl related non-magic-related reasons. So I'm in a bit of a situation, because I absolutely do NOT have the money to buy two decks. Anyway since I'm fairly new to the game, would you like to answer me this: Do you think the Clara - Twelve combo is actually good or does it just sound good in my head? Which deck would you rather advise? Should I just go by aesthetic or take the Twelve deck even though I'm not a big Thirteen fan??? Help?

I mean. Yeah. Of course they would work very well together on the battlefield. BUT-

-first, they're both as expensive to play as the average dragon in Magic (five and six manas??) but have no evasion at all and no protection against whatever your opponent will do to try to get rid of them. Second, it's eleven mana spent on something that has no garantee to make you win - and that's just for playing them! Because their combo would need you to play more spells afterwards to do anything! So on paper it looks really cool but in practice it's a lot of time and mana spent to do basically nothing.

And as I've said before, I'd never tell anyone to buy more Magic cards cause they are horribly expensive, so there's that-

-but I can definitely see the appeal of playing both of them in a casual game with some friends, so let me introduce you to the concept of proxies! It's basically as old as the game itself, because when you want to play some cool cards with your friends, you don't want to spend a shit ton of money on said expensive cards, so you just-

-print the card on cheap paper, and either glue it over a worthless Basic Land card, or just put it in a sleeve over a real card like in the photo above. Voilà. You can play it with friends without emptying your bank account lol

[bossymarmalade]

(originally posted on my dw, 12-oct-2010)

Dear Yoko Ono: You shouldn't even be here. But since you are, and at the time when the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with would have turned seventy years old -- I guess they thought you couldn't carry your own story, the one that began with you surviving the bombing of Tokyo and continued with you becoming the first woman accepted into the philosophy department of Gakushuin University. Maybe it didn't make you three-dimensional enough that you studied music and art at Sarah Lawrence with a special interest in the avant-garde and audience participation, that you had sex with who you wanted when you wanted and had abortions and miscarriages. Maybe to them you represent an idea of a weird dragon lady with careful accented English and inscrutable slanted eyes and wild harionago hair. I know you didn't make it onto the chart because they think you don't have any flaws. So you're not a villain, but you, an artist and a woman long long before Johnny and Paulie went on a magical mystery tour, you are mainly a love interest. They at least know you're not only interested in your man and only disapprove of his actions from time to time, but it's easy to assume that May Pang (another unimportant possibly fictional Asian woman) never existed, that you never sent John off to have his lost weekend and recover from all the alcohol and heroin before you let him come back to you. You're not an action heroine. Hunting down the daughter who was stolen away by your ex-husband, facing down headlines like "John Rennon's Excrusive Gloupie" and the constant death-threats and racialized insults, enduring the deep freeze from the rest of the Beatles during those tense White Album sessions because John would only go if you promised to go with him, those don't qualify you. Do others like her? Oh, Yoko, surely that's the damning stroke, because who could like you? A nation full of white people enraged that you stole away their Liverpudlian poet son, a world full of people enraged that you, single-handedly, YOU caused the end of the fabbest four, an unending stream of people who still call you ugly and shrill and a bitch, who say that those bullets should have found their way into your body that night and not that man who you loved and who you watched be gunned down and lost. How dare you think that you and your son have any right to decide how to remember John? Don't you know he belongs to the world, and not you who taught him to love and respect women, not you who took care of the business so he could stay home to feed the cats and rock the baby and bake the bread when he wanted to do that most of all? Do others like you? No, the chart says, and so you're Yoko Ono. Dear Yoko: I'd say fuck them, but you were in a bag in a hotel room decidedly *not* losing your shit at assholes attacking you for being a strong Asian woman since before I was born, so instead I'll say: It's bullshit that you're on this godawful chart at all, but I'd still be happy to find myself landing on your name at the end of it.