#duty again so no one gets severely kicked in the head. but i feel WEIRD doing it bc no one else was doing it when they were sitting out? wha

[narke]

i dont wannnnnaaaa go to monday night advanced class everyone there makes me nervous

[buckyarchives]

5 years of peace | Bucky Barnes

summary: you and Bucky go to vormir: who will make it back and save the world?

word count: 9.1k

author note: i wrote this a long time ago and was sure i’d lost it, but i found it! very lightly proofread and the formatting is a little weird. like i said, wrote this awhile ago. feedback is appreciated. fyi, no happy ending in this one.

You breathed in the fresh countryside air and filled your ears with the faint sound of wind chimes in the background. Coffee filled your nose as you nursed the warm cup in your hands. The wind blew gently through your hair as you took in the scenery, this moment. You were sitting on the porch of the big house you owned with the man you loved so fiercely through the years, experiencing the domestic life you'd dreamed of as a kid before the likes of Dreykov or shield forced it out of your desires. 

After the past 5 years, you cherished these moments of peace and quiet above anything, just to be in the moment and remember it fully later. The air felt cleaner these days; you had to look on the bright side of the great unfortunate event oh so many years ago. 

After the battle in Wakanda, after the dust settled, you learned to stop treading in place in denial and grief. You pulled yourself together, moved west with none other than Bucky Barnes, and settled down. You being a widow since birth mixed with Bucky's tortured past, you both knew the life of cutting your losses and learning to find the positive in horrible situations. In New York, you stopped bringing yourself further down. You moved on from losing half the world and let yourself live the life you'd always dreamed of with the man you'd always loved over the years.

You two bought a house soon after Stark left, you couldn’t handle living in the compound anymore and being haunted by the ghosts of people you couldn't save. You kept in contact with Tony and Pepper as they began raising a child, Tony helped you find a farmhouse and helped fund your living while you found yourself again. 

But the calm only lasted so long before the storm.

A gray car pulled up to your house and brought you out of your bliss trance, the gravel crunched under the tires as it came to a stop. You have been off duty for too long; you didn’t snap into a defensive stance and assess any threat as the unfamiliar vehicle stopped at your house. The doors flung open, and you are met with some familiar faces, quickly pondering whether they would bring good or bad news. 

“You look good, y/n.” Steve said, “healthy.”

You took a deep breath as you suddenly got confronted with the past; you didn’t completely sever your relationship with the remnants of the avengers. But it seemed everyone was in a different headspace, you wouldn't allow yourself to be brought down by sorrow anymore. 

“You too, Steve.”

A less familiar head popped out of the car after Natasha did, a brunette you vaguely remember from Germany. “Are we going to stand around longingly or are we going to explain why we’re here,” he spoke, the blunt lightness in his voice was a stark contrast to the two others. 

“Where's Bucky?” Steve asked. “We really need to talk to both of you guys.”

Eyes glanced from Steve to Natasha, you knew her well. A fellow widow you knew from the red room, she and Yelena were like sisters to you. An unspoken bond and shared experience, she was one of the few people who knew you in and out. You too; you saw red puffy eyes decorating her face. The way she fidgets and kicks at the gravel under her feet, her face shows a glint of hope, clinging onto it by her fingernails. You knew what they were here for,

Your breath hitched before stepping down the steps, closer to the trio, as you crossed your arms firmly across your chest. “I swear, Steve. If this is another desperate attempt to fix what happened years ago, I won't do it.

Your voice was tired and Steve's head hung low at your words, defeat flashed across his face. “I won't let myself get my hopes up just to feel like a failure in the end, I’m happy– we are happy. I need to keep what I have.”

Natasha couldn't bear eye contact as she turned her head at your words. Steve nodded along before taking a deep breath.

“Just give this one a chance, let us explain and you can back out at any moment. And if this doesn't work, we’ll never bother you with it again,'' Steve bargained.

Steve Rogers always had a way with words, a way of saying exactly what he needed to persuade a person without it being manipulation. You knew he meant no harm to you or your current life. Everyone was just trying to cling to the thought of fixing our failure. 

Natasha looked at you with tears brimming in her eyes. “Please, y/n. I think we have a real shot here.” the desperation in her voice could tear you apart alone.

“Bucky’s out back.” you breathe out, “Follow me.”

Gravel crunched under everyone's feet as you led the trio across your yard to the barn, to the horse stable. Coming into sight was a smiling Bucky Barnes, he cut his hair short after you moved and set down here, but now it was currently in a grown-out state between his older hair and even older hair. He stood next to a brown horse named luck, one hand on the horse's side and the other holding your 7-year-old son upright as he sat on the saddle. 

Although, your dreams of being a mother were crushed when you were only 16. You loved children and continued to help the plethora of children orphaned by the blip, who were unfortunate enough to lose both parents. One child, in particular, took a liking to you and Bucky.

 He was only an infant when the chaos of the blip caused a car crash, resulting in both his parents passing. You meshed well with him and it only felt right to make it official, adopting the boy and raising him as your own.

Ajax, your son, spotted you first as you approached the metal fence keeping the horses in. “Mommy!” his face beamed, and Bucky followed his gaze to meet you. His smile dropped slightly as he saw who followed close behind you.

“Hey, pal.” Steve offered as he greeted Bucky, Bucky waved back with a pursed smile.

Bucky reached for Ajax still sitting upon the horse, easing him off luck as he set him down just for Ajax to run off towards you. Shouting mommy as he practically catapulted himself towards your body and into his arms, adjusting his body to hoist him on your hip. Having two super-soldiers as parents came in handy for these things. 

“How’ve you been holding up, little man?” Natasha always had a soft spot for children, it was evident in how she reacted to Clint's children. Always aunt Natasha.

Ajax smiled brightly toward her as she ruffled his head of hair. His dimpled stressed, he replied by bringing his thumbs up toward Natasha. Earning a warm smile from every adult around him.

“What brings you guys here? Or have you just dropped in to join us for breakfast?” Bucky said, adjusting on the balls of his feet and shoving his hands into his pockets. 

“Breakfast?” Scott spoke up, a hint of excitement in his eyes and voice. 

A gentle smile rose to Bucky’s face as he set out towards the house, “as long as nobody tears themselves in half, you can join us.” 

You set down the small child, and a smile played upon your face. “Go show uncle Steve and aunt Nat and their friend where the kitchen is.”

Ajax beamed towards the three adults, a contagious smile as their faces lit up. You let him grab Nat's hand as he pulled her away, Steve and Scott following. You watched as the group headed towards the house; the sun shining down on everyone. Under different circumstances, you'd enjoy this sight. 

The avengers always had a tricky relationship, the line between foe and family always blurred. You'd always tried to keep the family together, so at times like this when it felt all too domestic– you had to soak it up.

Through a pair of large French doors, the kitchen table was placed with food and drinks. Ajax gladly took his spot in his seat as Bucky poured a glass of juice for him. Steve chuckled at the sight, “you know, as a kid, I used to think I’d be the first one to start a family. But it suits you, buck.”

A light laugh left his lips, “I don't know how you could have thought that with how you talked to girls.”

You sat at the table and nursed another warm cut in your hands, sipping at your coffee. Natasha took a seat next to you. Her blonde hair had grown out, and it faded into red, tied to the side in a braid. She hadn't been taking proper care of herself and it pained you to see. 

A bittersweet smile painted your face as you brushed through the few strands picked out. “You need some serious root touch-ups.” you joked, successfully earning a smile from her. 

The rest of the adults sat and made themselves comfortable around the table. Ajax sat at the end with you and Bucky at his sides. Steve sat next to his best friend and Scott strangled towards the end of the table. Like some dysfunctional family breakfast. 

“So, what's the groundbreaking news that dragged you all out here?.” Bucky fidgeted in his seat. 

A nervous cough from Steve as he looks towards Scott, currently shoving a piece of toast in his mouth, looking a little lost as he takes in your beautiful house.

“Well, make yourself at home,” Nat mumbled under her breath, earning a quick snort from you.

Scott finally caught up to the group and put down the piece of toast, clearing his throat as he looked at the faces around the table. “Uh, have you two ever studied quantum physics?”

Bucky, the absolute biggest secret science nerd, nodded his head. Especially now that Buckys had the past 5 years to catch up on the 70 years of science he missed. 

Scott began retelling his story of entering and traveling the quantum realm, and how he left, 5 years later. Despite it feeling like only 5 seconds for him. Scott explained that it was possible to enter and come out at a specific time. To a time before Thanos.

All the information at once felt too sudden, hitting you hard enough to knock you down to your knees, and you kinda wished you poured some bailey in your cup before you sat down. Bucky sent you a few worried glances towards you as you both took in the pieces of information. As you got over the initial confused wave before slowly grasping onto what Scott was saying.

“So you're saying you have a quantum realm time machine and want to go back to a time where we can get the stones?” you assessed, looking around the table. Somewhere along the conversation, Bucky slid his hand under the table and grasped yours as it lay over your thigh. Giving you a quick reassuring squeeze, he knows how overwhelming this must be for you.

Scott nodded slowly, “yeah, pretty much.”

You said nothing, and neither did Bucky nor anyone else at the table. Natasha had come to you with her desperate attempts and ideas to redo what we did, but none of them seemed remotely plausible and mostly just pathetic shots in the dark, but this. This sounded like something. Time travel is such a far-fetched and impossible concept for you. Especially after hearing a long and frustrating drunk rant from Tony years ago about his failure with time travel. 

“What happens if we lose again? I mean, what’s at cost here because I can't– I can't lose what I have here.” Bucky stumbled over his words, his eyes motioning around him, to his son, to his house, to you, and his entire life. “Steve, you know how much I've gone through to get where I am, even if I don't deserve it. I can't lose this now.”

“We don't know the risks yet, we still have some workshopping to do before putting anything at risk,” Steve explained, Scott followed with a reassuring nod. “We’re just working on getting the team together.”

You could only sit in silence as you went over your options, nervously chewing at your lips. Bucky was going to scold you later for worsening the habit he's been so determined to break for you. 

“What'd Tony say?” your voice came out small and weak, unsure of yourself.

The way Steve and Natasha's faces dropped instantly at the mention of the billionaire gave you your answer. Of course, Tony would say no. Over the years he’d grown the same mindset as you, he would not risk what he has now. His broken trust in Steve didn’t make this offer any more convincing, either.

But you've always had a little more faith in your friend than most.

You gave Bucky a look, a look that should tell him everything he needs to know. He just nodded.

“Give me and buck a moment to talk, watch him.” You pushed the chair out from behind you while gesturing towards your son, pulling Bucky away from the kitchen and out of the ears of the two other super soldiers at the table. To do that you'd probably have to exit the house, but in these trying times you'd trust them not to eavesdrop.

“What do you think?” Bucky nervously asked, scratching at the scruff on his beard. “Also,I see you, stop chewing your lip. It’ll bleed and then you'll just complain about it later.”

“I hate you.” you deadpan, Bucky just throws a cheeky smile towards you, giving you a quick peck on your broken lip.

You took a deep breath, “I think we should give it a chance. If you’re in, I’m in. If you're out, we can stay here. But we should at least stick around to help with the workshopping.” Bucky listened to you with his full attention, nodding along with your words. “We can just help, we don't need to put ourselves in any immediate danger if we don't have to. We can back out at any time.”

As you spoke, you felt like you were assuring yourself of this explanation more than Bucky Like you were searching for any reason to help without damaging your life now. Bucky would agree, he's done enough fighting over the century. He's not sure if he has any more left in him to give besides fighting over what time to put his child to bed or what to make for dinner.

“I’ll call a babysitter,” Bucky said, confirming that he agrees with you.

“I'll go tell them.”

You steal one quick kiss from Bucky before he grabs his phone from his pocket and types the numbers in, as your steps ascend away from him and back towards the kitchen. All eyes turned to you with glimmers of anticipation as they awaited your answer.

“We’ll go, but we're allowed to back out anytime we feel fit.”

Natasha looked like she glowed, the small ball of hope growing inside of her. Steve nodded with a small smile, “thank you.”

“Oh god, don't thank me yet, Rogers.” you joked, “we still gotta wait for the babysitter to show up before we leave.”

/

You don’t think that you — or anyone around you really understood what and where you were going, what you were doing. Like it hadn’t sunk in until this very moment when you stand across your teammates, in a circle ready to fly through time and space. Anything could happen and at any time, you could be stuck wherever you were going for days- years. It's all so unknown.

you weren’t going to try to hide the way your legs shook, 5 years ago you went to space for the first time, and now time travel? it’s all going too fast for you, when were you going to fall behind? it’s sure to happen one day.

Bucky's hand squeezed yours for a moment, you were going with him but who knew if this was the last time you’d see him. Things can go bad, they can fail. you looked up to him, like the angel he is, your worry seems to slip from your mind when you meet his gaze. His icy blue eyes never fail to knock your breath away and make you dizzy, so hard you couldn’t think. It helped.

Nat's face was all too helpful, her optimism scared you sometimes. She turned to see everyone, “see you in a minute.”

You muster up an awkward smile and nod, everyone syncs up their GPS and with one button, you are somewhere else in a totally different time. You steal one more glance toward Bucky. he smiles and mouths ' I love you’ (you know he's saying that in case it's the last time, it makes you feel more terrified) and you press the button.

Everything goes white and you feel your body tingling or being pulled apart. There are flashes of blue and you’re barely able to register what’s happening before you’re on a dark planet with nebula and Rhodes in front of you. Buckys beside you.

“Holy shit, it worked.” Rhodes shouts, almost like a sigh of relief, “that felt horrible, oh my god.”

Nebula says nothing and gives you a weird glance. you're not too sure about her, especially ever since talking about Vormir. both you and Bucky had agreed she gave off weird vibes, and not because of being Thanos's daughter or the unnecessary aggression.

“Are you okay?” Bucky takes no time to check you first, checking your body for— well, anything unusual.

“Yes, I’m okay, b.” you nod, placing a hand on his shoulder, giving him that comfort and reassurance you know he needs desperately. “Let's do this.”

Bucky nods and gives you a promised glance. 

“Okay, no funny business. get those stones and come back.” Rhodes hugs you and gives Bucky a shoulder squeeze. 

the spaceship brought to you by Rocket on behalf of the rest of the guardians stood behind you, already sized up and ready. Bucky’s nerves are on overdrive, his hands shake as he puts a hand on your lower back as you walk towards the hanger.

“hey! and watch each other six!” Rhodes shouts once more. Both your and Bucky's heads turn.

“you two!” bucky shouts, before you’re on the jet with him and readily strapping it.

you watch him intently, his anxiety has gotten worse than ever after coming back here. you weren’t ready to have to calm a winter soldier panic attack while flying a literal spaceship. 

“I am way too old for this,” Bucky speaks lightheartedly, a smile on his face despite the voices of impending doom in his head. 

“So am I,” you reply.

you're both done tinkering with the ship as Rocket instructed and now strapping in for launch. “I still got like a good 30-40 years on you, sweetheart.”

“still old.” you shrug, buckling yourself up. 

Your fingers shake as your punch in the coordinates and repeat what rockets discussed with you. This thing is a lot different from a regular jet.

“ready for take-off in 3… 2…” you lie back in your chair and Bucky breathes out a heavy breath. Getting ready. “… 1”

the gravity shifts and you’re taken aback by the pressure on your body as the ship catapults through space. you feel bucky's hand creep towards you, squeezing the top before you can sneak your finger into his. 

Once the shock settles and you adjust to the feeling, you look forward and in utter awe of the sight before you. Space was so beautiful, a mixture of purple, blue and pink. As well as every single shade and color possible, the stars shine bright and you swear you're dreaming. Never would you have imagined seeing such a sight in your entire life, weirdly it lifted your nerves and made you feel lighter. 

You look over to see Bucky’s reaction but he’s just staring straight at you, not even sparing a glance at the once-in-a-lifetime scene in front of him. Bucky looks like he’ll die of love sickest with how he looks at you. Admiring the way your eyes widen and the colors reflect off your features making you look like a complete and utter goddess. Bucky would rather soak this once in a lifetime sight than space, you are more important. More beautiful. 

“you’re gorgeous.” he breathes out, you couldn’t think of looking out at space after this. with this man in front of you, practically worshiping you.

you squeeze his hand once more, “I love you, James Buchanan.”

“I love you.” Bucky smiles.

It took an amazingly short time to get to vormir, landing was a lot easier than you’d expected. The planet was dark and empty, which just added to the ambiance of this mission, I guess? 

though you wish you could have found any other way to get up this horrid mountain where the soul stone is apparently. you were sure Scott could have shrunk down a helicopter or something, anything. because your legs were fucking killing you, no amount of super soldier serum between either of you could make you ready for this monster of a mountain. 

“I can't believe I'm in space but I still haven’t seen a normal flying car.” Bucky sighs, his breath heavy as he stops walking for a moment to breathe. “The future is so disappointing.”

You snort, following him and leaning up against the rocks. “That is not what you said when we started watching gossip girl.”

Bucky's head falls, and he chuckles, remembering your way too many hours of binging shows to catch Bucky up in the 21st century with all the newfound freedom from the blip. Bucky feels his legs sting from walking, how was he supposed to fight for this soul stone when he was already worn out?

“Why couldn’t we have sent Tony or Rhodes here instead? They can fly. This would be so much easier.” Bucky says, which earns a warm laugh from you that brings Bucky back down. It seems way too easy to get lost in the chaos of this and forget who you were. 

You kick a rock and pull yourself to your feet. “Come on, let's get going.” you put your hand out to offer Bucky help.

Bucky groans dramatically, “you have a more enhanced version of the serum, this isn’t fair.”

“Oh boo hoo, big baby.” You fake cry, but Bucky takes your hand and you head up the mountain more. “I'm sure you’ll live.”

Time seems to have no meaning once you reach a certain point, it feels like hundreds of hours since you first started up this rock — yet only a few minutes since you were standing in front of everyone ready to jump through time.

“I bet the raccoon didn’t have to hike up this,” Bucky grumbles under his breath.

“How many times has he said to stop calling him that?” 

“Then what is he?”

you sigh, “not a raccoon.”

Bucky laughs, but it’s cut short when a booming voice interrupts you two. trained assassin an all— in second Bucky had his hand ready and pointed and your barons out. whizzing with electricity and glowing blue in the dark light.

A man that seems to fly (or hover?), the black of his body misting into the air as he moves. A hood covers his face, but you see the scarlet red showing through.

“James Barnes, mother of Winnifred.” you seem Buckyrecoil at the sight and voice, his gun lowers slightly, and he falters at the mention of his mother.

“y/n, l/n, daughter of Roberto.”

Your eyes widen now, a breath escapes your lips. A flash of utter fear rushed through your body, a chill ran up your spine— confident the same feeling is mutual with Bucky. 

“I assure you, you have nothing to fear from me.” the hooded figure speaks, your weapons lower only slightly.

Bucky had a sneaky feeling whatever stands— floats in front of him isn't affected by gunshot wounds but his finger still stays happy on the trigger. “who are you?”

“Consider me a guide. To you, and to all who seek the soul stone.”

“creepy” you mutter under your breath.

The figure moves and you're more than ready to throw a powered-up baton at it. His black abyss of hands lowers his head and Bucky’s audible gasps. Your head flinches towards him just before seeing the skeletal figure, yet full red like the skin has just been stripped from his face.

“oh god.” Bucky's eyes are wide. “Nazis are guarding soul stones, the future really isn’t bright.”

“What?”

Bucky sucks in his breath. “That's the red skull.”

“Weird.” you huff, “great, so tell us where the stone is and we’ll be on our way.”

A part of you two knew too well that it would not be that easy, maybe hoped it would be, but reality had always been harsh for the two of you. 

Red skull sighed sympathetically, a strew of German words muttered under his tongue. “If only it were that easy.”

You didn't spare Bucky a glance before you looked the gray arch up and down. Continued forward with bucky close next to you, hands grazy each other as you walked. Under different circumstances, you could hold him. But the large rock that had dropped to the bottom of your stomach shook you, a fear and uncertainty you'd never felt settled deep in you. 

But, bucky knew better. He was strong than you and he reached out, just like you had done once for him, and held you, his gloved fingers laced into yours and held on tight. The unpleasant touch of leather on leather ha you yearning for things to be different. If you had said no you'd probably be in bed now tangled in each other lips, with no protective leather in between. 

That would be selfish, the blaring voice in the back of your voice screamed. You were a hero who needed to save others, you couldn’t hold onto the luxury of selfishness for long. 

It was like the voice was ingrained into your head when dreykov or elder widow made you repeat those phrases during class. You are nothing, you have no place in the world, and you are alone – always alone. Muttered under your breath seven days a week, while you ate, while you lay awake at night, while knives were shoved into you as a test, while you killed people with a straight face. It was all you knew.

Until Bucky came along and you decided you were going to try and save one person if you couldn't yourself, but along the way he save you. Sometimes just squeezing your hand just to remind you that, no – you were not alone.

The sky in front of you shined blue and purple, something you'd only expect from an otherworldly planet as their sunset. It was beautiful, it slightly settled the heavy weight in your chest.

Red skull led you both closer and closer to the edge of the mountain. Your hands shook wildly as your eyes traveled down, down, down. “What you seek lies in front of you… as does what you fear.”

“The stones down there.” you hide the shake in your voice, the uncertainty of what you had to do to get it hanged heavy above your head. 

“For one of you, for the other…” The red skull looked between you two, it scared you how even he had a glint of sadness in his presumably cold, dead, and hollow eyes. “In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange. A soul, for a soul.”

Bucky's hand slipped from yours and suddenly you realized how cold it felt up here, a freezing chill ran down your spine and shook you to your core. Bucky muttered under his breath, “a soul for a soul.”

A soul for a soul. One of you had to die.

You looked up at the man you love, and the same realization of what your future beholds carried through to his eyes. A croak settled in your throat that made you feel as if you were choking, but you didnt move. Bucky's head lowered, his head shook in denial as he paced toward the stone keeper, muttering a spew of Russian threats under his breath.

A hand grabbed at his chest before he could attempt to harm the being, you stood stone like – almost lifeless as you stopped him. “Bucky, I don't think that's going to work.” your voice was quiet, defeated as you blinked rapidly. Trying desperately to bring yourself down to reality.

“He– he's gotta be lying, I mean come on, Y/N '' he caught your attention as Bucky fought back the truth, his chest heaved as his breath got heavier, faster. “He's making this shit up.”

“He knew your mother's name, my father…I didn't” Your breath hitched, something you so desperately fought to push away or hide and just as you thought you were over it. It came back around to push you down to the ground. 

“So? That doesn't mean anything.” anger and denial laced his word, it was something you'd never heard before. 

Your feet dragged below you as you crept away from the edge and sat down on a rock, almost in a daze. The wind whipped around you and violet colors painted the scenery, everything. It was too quiet like a high-pitched ringing in the background as the storm crept closer. 

One of you had to die to get that stone, after all those years fate caught up to you. you'd never be able to live the life you dreamed of in your early years because you couldn't imagine it with anyone else besides the man that paced rapidly behind you. Threading his finger through his hair, feeling the rush of anxiety rise to his heart.

“Nope, nope, nope,” Bucky repeated, each syllable his voice raised louder and louder. His feet kicked the gravel everywhere as he abruptly stood right in front of you, snapping you out of your daze. His hands were thrown around as a burst of nervous laughter erupted from his chest, as bucky denied what had to be done.

“Nope, this is us backing out. You said we could back out anytime. This is us backing out, we are leaving.” he rattled on frantically, his hair a mess from grabbing and pulling it out of stress. His step carried him in a small circle as he paced in front of you. 

You shook your head slowly. “Bucky, no… we can’t. Were too far–”

“We’re not heroes! We never were, why are we starting now!” he yelled, pain dripping from his voice.

“If we don't come back with that stone, Billions of people will stay dead,” you spoke plainly, a croak in your voice.

You couldn't get the image of Natasha's face out of your mind. How this blip had driven her to the brink. Everyone failed on that day 5 years ago, some blamed themselves more than others but Natasha was too used to carry pain of everyone. She needed this win, she needed you. Everyone did.

Bucky breathed heavily, his face contorted as if he was being tortured. His eyebrows knotted and lines showed prominently on his forehead. You always imagined reaching out to him and smoothing the tortured lines along his face, like you’d rid of his worries with one touch. You touched his face lightly and he practically melted into you, bucky's head fell on your shoulder as you both pushed back choked sobs as tears brimmed each other's eyes. 

“What about Ajax? he's expecting his parents to come home together.” Bucky mumbled into your shoulder, his words broke you as you dropped your head onto Bucky as sobs escaped you. 

“We have to save them, Bucky.” your voice shook, even more, when you tried to breathe “We can get them all back.”

“And lose each other?”

You didn't dare respond to that question, both of you knew the answer. 

Somehow at this moment, everything felt so familiar. Despite being in a different time and on a different planet you'd never even known existed. You weren’t surprised you stood here in tears, ready to sacrifice everything ever loved or known. 

Bucky pulled away, seemingly more composed despite how broken he felt inside as he knew what he had to do. He lived too long and caused too much bloodshed along his lifetime to even deserve what he's had for the past 5 years. To have you– it was criminal. 

“One more time, please.” Bucky breathed, you knew what he meant and simply nodded.

Metal and flesh held your face once more, his eye trained on you, studying every feature so as to not forget. Like he'd do late at nights as the moonlight highlighted you, making you look like a goddess in need to be worshiped. Bucky obliged, joyful. He ingrained the image of your beauty one last time before he leaned down and captured your lips.

Bucky always kissed you so gently, like you were made of glass. Every peck never failed to cause butterflies to flutter throughout you like it was the first time despite the many kisses over the years. He always made you feel special, you couldn't ever imagine feeling worth anything without him to remind you with a simple kiss.

Pulling back, tears brimmed your eyes. But you held your chin up high, powering through as you've always been taught to. “Whatever it takes,” you muttered Steve’s words under your breath, your hand slipping back comfortably into bucky’s.

“Whatever it takes,'' Bucky repeated, his voice trailing off into a quiet whimper.

You looked up at Bucky, heavily exhaling as the weight settled in your chest once you made eye contact. Eyes narrowed back at each other, your face settled into the closest thing that could resemble peace at this moment. A quick flash of panic presented itself in Bucky's eyes as he frowned.

“No, no, Y/N. I know what you're thinking and– and, no.” Bucky rattled, his head shook slightly. The wind still whipped around as the breeze carried through his brunette hair. 

“It's gotta be me, Bucky.” you said.

He continued to shake his head. “Come on now, don’t be a hero.”

“And you are?” your lip quirked up as your voice steadied, repeating bucky's words. 

Bucky sighed heavily. “I deserve this.”

“No, you absolutely do not.” you snark, “don't get all self-wallowing on me, asshole.”

“I’m not, I'm trying to save your life, doll,” he spoke plainly like it was just that simple, saving your life by killing the one thing that kept you going.

You kept your mouth closed of sneaky comments, you smiled up at Bucky once more, earning the same from him. 

And that was enough for you.

“Ajax always liked you better, anyways.” 

Bucky's head perked up, “what?”

You smiled and Bucky was barely able to get the full phrase out before he hit the ground with a thud. You had grabbed his metal hand the harshest you've ever touched him and twisted it around so you could use all your strength to kick his back, successfully stealing the air from him and sending him down.  

“Tell everyone I love them.”

A mistake. Giving bucky any amount of time to rebound, maybe it was something deep down in you that didn’t want to leave him. Right as you set off to run and jump off the edge to a heroic death. Bucky is able to reach and wrap his vibranium fingers around your ankle harshly, tugging and sending to the grouch harshly. A shot of pain went straight up your leg when you fell, you’re sure Bucky fractured or broke something just so you'd stay down. 

You don't miss the way Bucky flinches when he sees you grunt in pain, his worst fears coming to life when he is faced with the choice of hurting you just to keep you alive. “No, Ajax loves you more.” 

Bucky grunts and rises to his feet and sets out to run, your hand shoots up as you curse to yourself for having to do this to bucky again. The red glow of your widow's bite shines brighter in the dark lighting of the mountain, shooting straight to Bucky's stomach as he recoils and spazzes, falling to the ground again. 

No way could he rebound from that so quickly, especially at the distance at which you shot him. Enough time to bring yourself up, ignore the pounding of pain shooting through your leg as you felt the bones in your ankle crunch. Turning away from Bucky once more as you limp towards the edge, speeding up as much as you can to get over there.

A harsh impact hits your back as Bucky tackled you down, successfully pinning you just as you've reached the edge. “I’m sorry, my love. I just can't let you do this.” his face is inches above yours as you landed on your back.

damn him for sweet talking you even now. 

“You think I want to do this?” you breathe out and your knee comes up harshly to his groin. Weakening him just enough to push him away.

almost over the edge, you need one more step and you'd be free falling. With the thought of Bucky in your mind, attempting to remember him as your loving husband, imagine him next to your son in the house you adored and littered yourself and the life you built everywhere. A report card from Ajax was pinned on the fridge. The stupid Captain America mug you bought Bucky in the sink. The rocking chair Bucky built for you so you could read on the porch. Coffee stains on the wood of the dining table because bucky never remembers to use the coasters.

 Everything you had with him and you'd promised yourself to remember him like that as you die, instead of the man tackling you with tears in his eyes as he attempts to save you.

You don't need saving, but Bucky will never let you win. His hand tugs you back from your jump and his arms wrap around you, pushing you back. But you stay planted in your space as you follow him and lock your arms tight around his waist. Holding him so close so if he decided to fling himself over, you'd go with. 

Rocks fall from the edge as you both try to balance your feet at the very edge, barely inching away from falling. Your both panting breath as you face each other now, eyes narrowing.

“Let go of me.” Bucky grunts. 

“Never.”

Bucky's face grimaces. “It should be me. Please, I've lived a long enough life, there's nothing left for me.”

“No.” you start but bucky's strained voice doesn't pause.

“Please, my love. I don't deserve this life, I’ve spilled too much blood to be the one to live.`` Bucky cries out. His grip around your waist is getting tighter, as he desperately soaked up the warmth of your body before he meets his end. “I can't live without you.”

“And you think I can?” you scoff. 

Bucky doesn't respond. His eyes don't leave your face as he gawks at you. “I love you, I love you so much James Buchanan.” you begin to rattle on, “i've loved you ever since the day we met, you're an amazing partner, an amazing father, and a good man. You are a good man, and your story is not over yet.”

“No, no, no. Please don't do this to me, doll.” Bucky pleads. 

“I won't let you fall again. Okay? I have to save you because you've already saved me.” 

Bucky's mouth croaks open, he feels like he is dying as the words leave his mouth. Bucky’s life practically flashes before his eyes, his long and tortured life but he can only see you. The way you light him up inside with just a smile, bringing out the best version of himself he can be after everything that's happened. 

You've already saved him enough, you were there for him before anyone else. You helped him heal. You brought him back out of the water when he was sure he’d drown. You were his everything and Bucky knew he couldn't live a life without your smile. He has to save you, again.

A flash of promises shows in Bucky's eyes, he's going to win. Bucky makes sure you see it.

But you're smarter. You cycled through the red room too many times to count. Bucky held a far advantage with his strength, but you were smarter– you were stalling. Bucky was a fool to let himself rattle for so long, especially with your baton held tight in the hand that pushed him close to your body. The electricity powered up every second he bargained his life because the truth is you had won the moment his grasp held you.

“I'm sorry, James.” 

You grunt as you jab him hard in the left shoulder, where the horrid scars of his past hid. Where metal connected to the flesh, the machine to the man. The electricity coursed wildly through him and the vibranium arm. His grip lets up and you inch yourself to the side as Bucky curls into himself, his body acting on its own accord to the shock. 

More rocks fell as your foot slipped purposely and your weight shifted, letting you fall off the edge. 

Just as you've accepted your fate, Bucky's flesh hand barely grips you. His chest is down flat on the edge of the mountain, looking down at you as you dangle. Tears are falling down his face as watches you so close to your death. Croaks and pleads leaving his mouth as tries hard to pull you up.

“Just let me die, goddamnit!” you yell, growing frustrated that he had to drag out this pained process any more.

“I can't.” Bucky croaks, a tear slips from his eye and drops down, down and down. To where the stone lay. Bucky wont let you die for him.

But you've already won. Hands sipping much faster than pulling. 

“It’s okay.” was all you said; so simply, as if it didn’t take the breath from bucky's chest

“No, it's not.” he whimpered. “You don't deserve this.”

Bucky’s desperate grip only holds you by the end of your fingertips. His vibranium arm sat useless as the electricity that coursed through it successfully apprehended him. You're slipping from Bucky's finger and he can't do anything. Bucky can only watch you, smiling up at him like any other morning. Hiding the fear coursing through your body, only one tear falling down your cheek. 

“Let go.” Your voice is gentle and soft. Bucky wishes he kissed you more, held you tighter, and fought harder. He deserved to be in your place, falling to his death like he should have back in the 1940s. 

“You’re going to be okay.”

“I love you, Y/N.” bucky croaks out one last time.

You nod, but your mouth stays closed You’re going to fall, slipping from Bucky's fingers as he fails to save you. Bucky can't look away, despite the horrible fear of having to last remember you like this– dangling off a mountain just as you're about to fall to your death, just to save him. Bucky doesn't want to remember you like this.

Your hand slips, and you fall down, down, down. So far bucky can't hear the thud when your body hits the ground as you meet your fate. Bucky lets out one last whimper as he screws his eyes shit– he won't let himself remember you like this. The night you met, faded memories of seeing you at Hydra, in the heat of battle against aliens, Sunday morning when you're tangled in white sheets and his own limbs, laughing with your friends or caring for your son. Anything but the image of your body lying dead because he failed. 

And now he's alone. Again. The emptiness that finds his body taunts him. Bucky feels like he died with you.

The sky booms and cracks, and the brightest light blinds him even with his eyes shut. Bucky's sobs to himself of your memories just as everything goes black.

/

Tall grass crunched under her feet as a whole pack of small village children ran after her in fits of giggles, a smile tugged her face as she watched them race towards the small red hut by the lake. Her eyes narrowed and a hand rose to her face to shield the bright Wakandan sun on this warm spring day. 

“Hey! Leave the poor old man alone,” she shouts as the children make teasing noises at the half-woken man, giggling to themselves as they mutter under their breaths. They skidder away and run past her, but not before she can playfully tussle the head of one of the kids as they run off to play. 

Her smile subdues, and a light joy is still lingering on her face. Pulling back the drapes to see a one-armed man arising from his small cot, hair thrown back in a messy half-bun and dressed in rich red and blue. He craned his neck and groaned as if he were nursing a headache. She gives him time before speaking, not until his eyes land on her body and he registers her presence. A small and welcoming smile was placed upon her lips.

“Good morning, Barnes,” she speaks, her voice is light and warms bucky’s chest. “Did you sleep well?”

Bucky stares at her for a moment, blinking a few times as if he doesn't understand the questions. A future version of himself watches through bucky’s eyes, a future version that had just lost you. Bucky feels a sense of panic suge through his chest as he realizes what he's watching, seeing, reliving. He is here and presents in this body, but the past version of him is here too. 

Bucky had no control over this memory as he relived it again, he can't move to hug you. He is unable to open his mouth to tell you how much he loves you. The emotions of loss and panic don’t show on his face. 

This is not like being the winter soldier, he had no control and can only watch his body act through his eyes. But he's lived this, he knows what happened next and then on for the 7 years of you. He knows no harm or hurt now, his chest feels warm.

She notices his lack of response and remembers herself in his shoes. “I'm here to watch over you and help you recover. I’m a friend of Steve, he suggested I stay here with you.`` Her voice is calm and reminds Bucky of honey. “I've been in a similar situation, the whole brainwashing thing.”

Bucky blinks once, twice. The girl before him is about to speak once more, to let Bucky know he's safe and in good hands. But his raspy, rushed-out words stop her.

“I know you.”

The ends of her lip quirks up, her head falls down to hide the amused smile. The future version of bucky's consciousness wishes she hadn't hidden her smile, just so bucky could bask in the light of it one more time. 

“Yeah, I was at the airport in Germany with Tony.” she stuttered out, nervous over the fear that Bucky might push back once the knowledge she wasn't initially on his side a year ago. Instead, that thought doesn't even scratch his mind, no— something entirely different.

“No.” bucky cuts her off, “i know you.” 

Her eyebrows furrowed and her chin tilted upwards slightly, she always did this when confused or curious. Bucky knew the act too well. “Pardon?”

Bucky’s past broken mind, filled with foggy memories pieces together messily. Some only through the lens of the winter soldier. But he remembers her as himself. 

“You gave me a granola bar.” his voice is only above a whisper, still groggy from his sleep. 

A wave of confusion flashes through her before she winches back as the memory comes back to her like a truck. Her face drops, as a widow and her many years of being cycled through the red room. Hydra had a distant and messy relationship with Dreykov and the red room; it didn't last long, but it's how she ended up at a Hydra facility one night. 

Which she was confronted with hearing the screams of a tortured man only a room away. The man she only heard hushed rumors about, of an unstoppable man that wasn't allowed to die, a dangerous weapon, the fist of Hydra– the winter soldier.

She hadn't been chemically brainwashed then, she still had her humanity and sympathy hidden behind the walls built up by dreykov. That fateful night she hid a granola bar under her shirt, one she intended to eat. Her only meal for the night, yet she hid it and snuck to the winter soldier's chamber with no hesitation or thought. Snuck past the Hydra agents as they changed their shifts, slipped it through the bars, and threw the food towards the naked, grime-covered man chained to a wall.

Bucky remembers making eye contact with the girl for only a short moment, as he noticed the plastic package skid by his body, initially he flinched at the bar, and realization set in that he was in no immediate harm. The first warm feeling coursed through him in decades, he studied that girl's features so hard as not to forget. 

She skidded away soon enough but bucky ingrained the memory in his mind. In hopes of it staying there despite the constant torture and brainwashing from Hydra, promised himself he wouldn’t let them take every good thing away from him. The memory got muffled out over the year, but he didn't forget now that she sat in front of him years later.

A small genuine smile rose to Bucky's face for the first time in a while, it was a contagious smile at the moment as her lips quirked up too. She still sat stunned as the resurfacing of such an old memory came back. “Yeah, that was me.”

Bucky wants to cry, he isn't sure which version of him purifies this feeling. He remembers feeling hopeful at that moment way back then when he first really met you. He wants to stay in this moment forever with you, cherish it, and ingrained every second of this memory in his brain where all he can think about is you. 

You, the day you dragged him out in the peak of the morning to go for a walk around the lake. You did that every day, or let the village kids drag him out of his hut to play tag or other silly children games. or you'd take him into town to help him learn to be around people by offering his help to the elders and making him do chores and tasks around the community. He told you it was annoying and hated it but secretly enjoyed it. Anything involving you made Bucky feel more alive and warm, more human.

He'd do anything to get those moments back again. Anything.

/

Bucky's eyes flutter open as he lays down his back in a pool of water, making his suits stick to his skin. Sitting up with his hair now sopping wet, his fringe sticking to his forehead and face as water dipped from his head and mixed into his teras.

Looking around as he sat in miles of water, your body and the mountain you just fought on out of sight. Only the faint sunset of purples and oranges filled his sight, his head hangs low in defeat. Tucked into his metal hand, holds the glowing light of the soul stone. 

The only reminisce of your life, your sacrifice sitting in his palm. Glowing just as bright as once did. This stupid thing cost your life, a disgust washed across bucky’s face as he narrows his eyes at it. This stone had killed you, and bucky let it.

His body falls in on itself as he hits the ground, and a whimper follows. His quantum suit activates and he shrinks back down before he can allow himself to grieve, allow himself to cry.

Bucky barely process the change in scenery and time as he was taken back to the present day and back in the compound. A dazed, emotionless face is painted as the rest of the avengers look around with hopeful, almost gleeful faces. The bright light of the room is a stark contrast to the dark scenery of vormir. Bucky’s head pounds.

Steve and Natasha meet bucky’s figure at the same time, and more importantly– the lack of your standing next to him.

Natasha's face drops, “bucky? Wheres Y/N?”

The room's attention is now on bucky and he suffocates under it, you've been gone for only a few moments but the waters already filling back up, and soon bucky’s drowning again without you. His lips quiver when he looks up to see Steve's concerned eyes. Water is still dripping down his face and off his body. 

“What happened, buck?” Steve asks, his steps slowly coming closer to bucky’s body. As he stands there almost frozen in grief, and anger. Resembling a statue if it were for the slight quiver of his lip or the heavy rise of his chest as bucky feels a panic attack arises in his core.

A sharp inhale, bucky’s eyes flicker towards Natasha, then Steves. Bucky breaks.

Heavy footsteps that put a fear into everyone around him, trudging toward steve. Bucky's face contoured into a pained gesture as he stops right in front of his best friend, showing the glowing stone harshly into his chest. Steve grunted at bucky's motion as he grabbed the yellow stone, feeling the aggressive shake of Bucky's hands.

“Here's your fucking stone, steven.” bucky barks, a shake trembled the core of bucky’s voice.

Bucky grimaces, his feet carrying him quickly out of sight from the others. His pace sped up, heading to the only place he can think of. Your old room, where he’ll allow himself to cry. 

taglist ; @ivywasmaroon @ozwriterchick @slytherinambitious @wintermischief @silverfire475

[malopeach]

as someone whose first time doing drugs was a very BAD time, i feel it is my duty to add on to this post with everything i did wrong in the hopes you all can avoid it, as well as general safety tips!

Do not take the whole edible if it is your first time. you do not know how sensitive your system is yet, and too much WILL send you spiraling. And this applies to all drugs in general. if it is your first time, START SMALL. it’s going to affect you more severely anyway, if your body isn’t used to it! try just a little, so you can better understand how you react to it and also so you can understand what the crash from that substance might feel like. When i tried mushrooms, i did just a little but the crash for me was three straight days of disassociation and general foggy-ness so i know mushrooms are probably not for me now!

Specifically for edibles; SERIOUSLY. DON’T EAT THE WHOLE THING. edibles take longer than you think to kick in, do not eat the other half of the brownie just because it isn’t working after thirty minutes. whatever you Think is a good does, try less than that first!!! u can Always take more if you want later, but you can’t un-eat weed!

In regards to trying drugs with buddy to keep you safe, that person should be: 1] either sober or if that is not an option, very experienced in this drug that you are taking 2] be responsible and trust-worthy. your friends boyfriend whose been trying to hit on you is a bad choice (TRUST ME). 3] should have some kind of emergency contact for you. if not your parents, an adult you trust who will care more about your safety than the fact you were experimenting with drugs. In my opinion, the ideal scenario is trying it with a small group of close, trusted friends with at least one person whose willing to stay sober and keep an eye on the rest of ya (i have personally always had a better experience in that sort of setting and also it has been VERY funny to be the one sober friend lol).

you should be somewhere safe and comfortable. Don’t do drugs the first time and then head out to some weird underground rave in the woods, at best you’re setting yourself up for a really scary first trip, at worst you could definitely get hurt!

Eat, drink water, and having a comfort item definitely never hurts as well. Put on a fun movie, or some nice music. the point of any drug is to enhance a pleasant experience, so if it is your first time try to keep things light.

listen to your body. if you take something and feel Extremely Not Awesome either while high or after sobering up, really ask yourself if this is something you want to use again. there are definitely drugs my body is simply not suited too and i do not intend to use again because my body told me very firmly that it would be A Bad Time.

Also OP is extremely right about this so i’ll say it again: i’d really recommend not trying things more risky than weed or alcohol at such a young age. 1] its much easier to develop an addiction at that age and much harder to quite 2] some drugs can really fuck with your brain development, and your pre-frontal cortex isn’t done cooking dude!!! Weed will get you PLENTY high and there isn’t much of a need to experiment with things more dangerous than that. think of it this way: overdosing on weed gives you bad dreams and a headache the next day. Overdosing on coke will probably kill you if its your first time.

At the very least, im begging you to NOT let your first experience with drugs be with something hard like meth or heroin. i promise you it will suck so bad!!! its so much easier to overdose, to have a bad trip, or to wind up in a dangerous situation. weed is a perfectly fine drug for your first time!! the point is to have fun, not be as edgy as possible. Take it slow!

Speaking of overdosing; i’d recommend for everyone in general, not just those experimenting with drugs, to keep narcan on hand! its life saving! And NO, touching fentanyl will not get you high, despite what cops say, administering narcan to someone will not put you in danger and it can save their life. i can vouch for it being perfectly safe to administer, as i’ve done it before! Do your research on how to use it, and in many places you can get it for free!

i know its cliche but it is genuinely okay to say no!! Even if everyone else in the room is doing it, if you don’t want to then don’t! the kinds of folks who would try to pressure you into doing drugs are not usually fun people to do drugs with! if they are trying to convince you to do drugs without any regard for if you actually WANT to, they do not have your best interest at heart! Say no! if they keep pushing, leave! At bare minimum, you probably just wouldn’t have a very good time to begin with because folks like that suck to be around while high and usually push you to take to much. And at worst, they may actually harm you! If you feel pressured, its okay to say you don’t want to. Besides, that means u instead get the honored task of being the sober friend who still remembers how to order the pizza for all your high, probably very hungry friends.

don’t be afraid to call for help or go to a hospital if things are going very bad! EMTs and medical professionals aren’t going to rat you out to the cops for overdosing, that is not their job. They will probably tell your parents/legal guardians if you’re underage but your safety matters more. There are MANY hard drugs that could kill you if you overdose, please prioritize your own life over not getting in trouble!

Weed and Alcohol can be fun, but use them responsibly. Step one to proving to yourself and others that you are mature enough to handle that sort of thing is Not Dying and Not Developing A Crippling Life Long Addiction.

why do so many teenagers follow me. you know i do drugs right.

[strayen-fx]

Red.

》 HHJ x reader

》 angst, vampirish theme

》 warnings: mentions of blood, hints of physical assault

》 2.1k words

》 a/n: short and simple, after months of writing break. Hope you guys enjoy regardless :)

“Stay away from them, my dear. Save your blood from the horrors of their fangs. Be wary of solitude, and be wary of the crowd.”

It was a day not unlike any other. My morning kicked off lazily, with me waking up almost an hour later than a college freshman was supposed to. Nothing unusual there. I did my usual morning prep, took a cup of grandma’s tea in one gulp, and went my way. I was already late for the train—I had to run after a departing bus with an exceptional speed that would put Olympiads to shame. I got in the room just in time as the bell rang for first period. I came in huffing like an old man, but it’s alright. Way better than walking through the early jam-packed hallways.

The first aberration in my daily humdrum existence happened on my way to fourth period. A student from another department stopped me on my tracks. I knew him; he was a member of the student council. Was I in some sort of trouble?

He introduced himself as Han Jisung, then proceeded to ask if I have seen his friend.

“He’s tall,” Jisung explained. “But like, not super tall. Not the towering-over-people kind. He has a mole under his eye. He’s got black—no wait, I think he dyed his hair again the other day. Anyway, have you seen someone like him? He’s noticeably handsome. I guess. I’m more handsome, though, but you know what I mean.”

The whole school would know who he is talking about. The one and only Hwang Hyunjin: champion swimmer, council member, and just a general talk of the town. The Prince. Even if I did see him around, though, I wouldn’t know. I never pay attention to the people I walk by.

I shook my head and muttered a soft sorry. I did feel bad for Jisung. He looked so worried and dejected, and I can’t blame him—not after after the incident with Seungmin. I can’t really take it against him to worry about his friends. I sauntered off to my next class, my mind still stuck on the fact that a normal person in my school has actually talked to me, and I was able to keep my composure.

Fifth period: P.E. I don’t even know why we still have this subject in college. I opted to take a stroll instead. You see, a huge, dense forest is situated right behind the main school grounds. You could say that the school itself lies within the bosom of greeneries. Unkempt bushes and rows of towering trees stretched over several miles deep, starting from the edge of the campus to god-knows-where. It is my goal to scout the whole area before graduation.

Weighed down by my personal monstrous beast, I trudged through. I walked for at least fifteen minutes before I finally reached the spot—my spot. Sheet of decaying leaves cushioned a huge gray boulder, standing at least ten feet tall, shaped like an odd piece of egg smashed against the forest floor. Against it stood a larger stone, this one dotted with moss and weathered with cracks. They were propped against each other for support, as if stopping one another from tumbling to the ground.

There was a smaller rock at the foot of the smaller stone, and I use it as leverage to climb up and sit on top of the largest boulder. It was my favorite place. Most times I could just pretend that I was alone in my own tiny bubble, at the center of that clearing that nobody else ventures but me. I don’t feel the breath of people suffocating me with every step that I take. I don’t feel my heart thumping with the sight of anyone else. I don’t need to hold back. Here, I don’t feel weird.

But today felt somehow different.

It was awfully silent. The wind felt sharper and colder. Electricity was humming in the air, leaving my skin prickling with discomfort. There was a tension in my veins that I couldn’t quite explain—it felt like an omen of an incoming disaster.

Time ticked slow. A couple hours could have passed—or maybe it has only been five minutes—when a nearby rustling perked up my senses.

Trying to keep my movements as quiet as possible, I hopped down and took up a defensive position, which wasn’t easy to do for a student with no actual weapon aside from an almost-empty bag and a worn-out calligraphy pen. My instincts told me to take cover—but my feet seemed glued to the ground. Sweat trickled from my forehead. My hands started to feel clammy.

And then, just as I was about to scamper away, a figure crashed into view from behind the nearest oak tree. I almost threw my bag towards the person’s direction, until I had a clear view of the intruder’s face.

It was Hwang Hyunjin, wide-eyed and disoriented, with his cheeks and uniform smudged with traces of blood.

“Help me.”

His voice came out as a tiny croak, as if his throat was filled with acid. He stumbled towards me, reaching out his hand for support. I wasn’t able to move an inch—and who could blame me? The situation was way too hard to process.

Hwang Hyunjin, the university prince, was hunched huffing before me, his clothes caked with mud and dried blood, his hair a nest of mess on his head. He had a cut on his cheek, I noticed. His breathing was heavy and labored, as if the mere act of standing on his own two feet required all the effort he could muster.

“Help me,” he repeated.

“What happened to you?” I managed to blurt out. My initial thought was that some random outsiders kicked his butt for stealing their girlfriends. But no—someone like Hyunjin would have been able to handle that. Plus, something in his eyes showed an elaborate fear—something only a beast would be capable of instilling. I should know.

My heart began thumping faster, a colossal drum barreling in my chest.

Just as my schoolmate was about to open his mouth and explain, a loud rustling broke the stillness of the air. Before I could process what was happening, Hyunjin grabbed my hand and bolted away, dragging me with him.

“Don’t look back!” he warned.

I did.

At least a dozen feet behind us was another male, probably as old as Hyunjin. He was sporting our school uniform, walking casually under the shades of trees as if time wasn’t of any matter. What puzzled me, though, was the fact that we can’t seem to distance ourselves from him despite the heavy efforts Hyunjin had been exerting to drag us both away from this newcomer.

I took another glance behind me, and to my surprise, the young man wasn’t there anymore. Nowhere behind us, as if he dissipated without a single trace.

Hyunjin took a sudden stop, causing me to bump my head against his back. I was about to call him out for stopping, but then I saw the looming figure a few meters in front of us.

“You…?” I began, my mind a juggle of unanswered questions. How on earth did that happen? How is he—

Hyunjin's friend, Kim Seungmin, stood before us in his dirty school uniform. He looked pale, his eyes bloodshot, but he was standing there in full grace, very much alive, giving us a toothy grin. “You’re hurting my feelings, Hyun. Why are you running away from me?”

Hyunjin’s grip on my hand went tighter. “Seungmin...”

“Friends are supposed to help each other, am I right?” Seungmin continued, faux dismay dripping in his voice. He bared his fangs, its tips dripping with fresh blood. “So help me, Hyunjin.”

I felt my body run cold. I wanted to scream, run, anything—anything to get away from this. From him. From the two of them. From everything. But Hyunjin's hand remained strong around my wrist, and my legs were close to turning jelly. I could start to feel the fullness in my mouth, the pointy ends of my incisors. Something that only happens when I'm in an extreme hunger or danger.

“Stay away from them,” grandma said. “We are the same kind, but we are different. Weaker. They see us as preys, as special commodities. They can smell your blood despite my concoctions, my dear, remember this!”

Seungmin tilted his head to one side, finally regarding my presence. “And you, over there. I’ve never tried drinking such special blood.” He grinned. “Satiate my thirst.”

The last thing I knew, a strong hand was pressing tightly around my neck, turning my vision green.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°

“Have you heard of the news?”

“What news?”

“Kim Seungmin was safe! They found him in the forest yesterday.”

“Thank goodness! Was he hurt?”

“He had a few gashes, but he’s fine. Hyunjin found him and brought him to the hospital right away.”

Students filled the corridor, everyone bustling and hustling about the news: after his sudden disappearance, Seungmin was finally found by his best friend, Hyunjin. The latter saw him in the forest, hungry and disoriented. They went straight to the hospital to treat his minor wounds, and that was that—nobody bothered to ask how he managed to lose himself in the wilderness, or how we managed to survive seven days on his own. Nobody asked him stupid and unnecessary questions. Seungmin was safe, and that was all that mattered.

I brushed my way past the milling crowd, flinching at every accidental touch. I kept my eyes on the ground, forcing my mind into silence. I was expecting everyone to be in their respective classrooms at this time of the day, but apparently, the news of Seungmin’s return has become enough reason for everyone to wander about and neglect their individual duties. It was a grand miscalculation on my part—I hadn’t braced myself for this huge number of people.

Not here. Not now. Not ever.

I just have to get back home, and then it’ll be over. My insides would stop churning once I’ve drunk grandma’s tea—that has worked for 18 years now. I can stop this. I can stop me.

I made a run towards the comfort room. To my luck, nobody was inside. I washed my face over and over, as if doing so would cleanse me from the impurity stamped on every drop of my blood. The face on the mirror horrified me—I had to stop myself from punching the glass over and over.

The moment I stepped out, I felt his presence.

He was there, leaning against the wall, lurking behind the shadows. There was a faint gleam of terror in his eyes, but at the same time, I can feel it: the hunger. Lust for meat. Thirst for blood.

“Don’t be like him, Hyunjin,” I pleaded. “Don’t be like us.”

He shook his head in resignation. “It’s too late.”

He took a step closer. Another. He kept on walking until he stood right in front of me, too close I can feel him breathe.

Too close I can see the faint traces of blood on his lips.

“I’m still hungry,” he sobbed. “I’m still hungry…”

Fear was apparent in his eyes—fear of what would happen to him, fear of what he had become. “You will be fine,” I offered, taking his hand in mine. “Trust me on this. It will be fine.”

And then I felt it, stronger this time—the hunger he was talking about. The thirst. My stomach growled in protest at the sight of Hyunjin’s pale flesh. I can smell his blood—I can feel its steady rhythm as it flowed through his pulsing veins.

I need to get home. Maybe my grandma could do something about Hyunjin, too. Maybe she could produce a stronger tea, and both of us wouldn’t have to worry about our instincts anymore.

We stood next to each other for a full minute before he broke the silence.

“We need each other to survive,” Hyunjin whispered. “If we drink the blood of our own kind, we can last for a month without feeding on others.” He freed his hand from my hold and gripped my shoulders tightly. “I need you. And you need me, too.”Hyunjin leaned down until we were staring at each other at eye level. He closed the distance between us. I closed my eyes, and for the first time, I allowed my monster to take ove.

[amatchinwater]

160: “ Do you think you can teach me that? ” Stiles/Jordan

Thank for a few things! For one, being patient with me. Secondly for being okay with me swapping Jordan out for Jackson (I even tried again and it still didn't work), and thirdly for giving me a prompt in the first place!

I hope you enjoy some Stackson!! I've been recovering from covid and needed some fluff, hope that's okay!!

---

With all the research Stiles did about werewolves after Scott got bit, one would think that after getting the bite from Derek, he'd have the easiest time acclimating. That learning control and all other wolfy attributes would be a piece of cake. Like riding a bike for the first time again in years. Muscle memory.

But no.

So far, the only thing that's come naturally to Stiles is how drawn he feels towards Jackson of all people. Which he understands; now. He didn't at first and the new wolf got to have a wonderfully embarrassing conversation with Peter about it. The older Hale took pity after several minutes of pouting. Okay, he might’ve whined too.

He absolutely did.

But it worked.

That night Stiles found out a few things. Mates are indeed a real thing. Stiles absolutely has one. And it's Jackson. His childhood bully. The ex-kanima that tried to kill him more than once. Granted, now that Jackson has healed from his past and has a stable pack, he's a pretty great guy. Still a hot head and a bit of a dick, but a friendlier one. And Stiles has never once denied the jock is painfully attractive either.

There's worse people in the world he could've been mated to.

He does find himself wishing he had the blonde's level of control though. It's been three months since he got the bite and Stiles still needs to be chained up on the full moon. Derek, being the dutiful Alpha, stays back with him while the rest of the pack goes and hunts. He's yet to find his anchor unlike every other pack member and it sucks.

Scott uses his mate Allison as his anchor, which is great for him. Stiles has no idea though if Jackson even knows if they're mates. So he's not going to bring it up or use the other wolf, thinking it'd be weird. He's determined to take a page out of Boyd’s book and be his own anchor.

It's not working.

Not even today as the pack is sparring. Stiles got kicked to the sidelines because he can't keep his claws and fangs out of the equation. On a normal day, that wouldn't matter. When Zen Master Derek wants them to focus on their control, it kind of does. At least he gets to watch Jackson's muscles move as he fights. That counts for something, right?

The blonde punches Isaac square in the nose and the other wolf snarls, flicking out his claws and taking a swipe at Jackson's chest.

"Whoa," the former kanima jumps back, narrowly missing the attack. Isaac stops and takes a step back, claws retracting and Derek does nothing. "What the fuck, Derek? So your precious first Beta can use his claws, yet Stiles' only pops out and he gets benched? What kind of bullshit is that?" Jackson's chest is heaving, eyes glowing blue as he growls through Stiles' defense. Jackson himself might not know they’re mates, but his wolf certainly does given the outburst.

Their Alpha rolls his eyes where he stands to the side with Peter. "Isaac didn't need both me and you to subdue him." Derek crosses his arms, looking at Jackson fighting his Beta shift. "Do you need to sit out too?"

Stiles watches in awe as Jackson looks his way before closing his eyes. With a steady breath, his claws go away and when he opens his eyes, they’re their beautiful icy, human blue once more. “No,” the other Beta says, still watching Stiles, “I’m fine.”

“Wow,” the newest wolf stares, “do you think you can teach me that?” Stiles has asked everyone else and even Deaton for help. Maybe it’s time to ask Jackson.

“Teach you what?” Jackson pinches his brows in adorable confusion. “H-how to calm down?” He walks over to where Stiles is sitting in the lawn chair, ignoring the hushed conversations of the pack.

Stiles nods, “uh, yeah. I’d like to not be held down on full moons anymore.” The wolf picks at his nails, “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.” He also doesn’t worry for a second about being this vulnerable in front of the other wolf. Feeling nothing but comfort from someone who a few short months ago certainly would’ve ridiculed him for this. Even an unsolidified mate bond has a positive effect.

But now Jackson’s face softens and he squats to be eye level, something the other boy would find condescending from literally anyone else. Stiles can only find appreciation. “You still haven’t found your anchor?” The blonde puts a hand on the other boy’s bouncing knee, he hadn’t realized he’d been doing it until Jackson’s action ceased it. “That’s how I do it, I use my anchor.”

“Well, what’s yours? I tried anger like Derek and Peter but that only makes it worse.” Stiles curls his shoulders in, looking at his lap, “my mom doesn’t work quite like Isaac’s dad does either.” He tries his best to stifle a whimper at the very thought. His wolf wants to reach out for the other boy for consolation, but he stops himself.

The jock’s free hand cups Stiles’ chin, lifting his gaze to ensure eye contact. “You,” Jackson says, sliding his hand to the other boy’s cheek. “You’re my anchor, Stiles.” He further explains, “you’re my anchor because you’re my mate.”

“You know?” Amber eyes widen in shock before he huffs, “why does no one tell me that they know these things too? I’ve wanted to say something for weeks but didn’t know how to tell you.”

“I didn’t know how you’d feel about it being me,” Jackson shrugs. “It seemed better to let you figure it out on your own and come to me when you were ready.” The blonde eyes him warily for a moment and suddenly Stiles is scooped up in his arms. Jackson takes his seat in the lawn chair, settling the other wolf in his lap. “Next time you feel yourself losing control, think about me. See if it helps. And if you’re okay with it, I’d love to actually be mated to you, Stiles.”

The wolf in his chest curls up in a contented ball, damn near purring being so close to Jackson. Breathing in his scent and nuzzling his nose in the other boy’s neck on instinct. Stiles can’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. His pack has ensured that not once has he felt touch starved, but holy hell, finally getting to be in contact like this with his mate is one of the best feelings ever.

“Fucking finally,” Isaac quips across the yard at the pair snuggled on the chair.

Jackson chuckles before popping off an amused, “shut up,” and kissing the top of Stiles’ head.

The other wolf can’t find it in himself to say anything. Too pleased and content to be exactly where he is. Something deep down telling him that his scent is doing more than a good enough job explaining just how happy and okay with the situation he is.

[sofreddie]

Stashed Away

Summary: With their biological clocks ticking, the brothers set out to find their True Mates, before it's too late.

Characters: Alpha!Dean x OC!Omega!Reader, Alpha!Sam x Unnamed!Omega

Warnings: A/B/O Dynamics, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Mating, Marking, True Mates, Institutionalized Reader, Heavily Medicated Reader, Implied/Mentioned Sterilization

Word Count: 2,876

A/N: For @spnabobingo 2021 - Free Space. This is my first square on my first ever bingo card. Let me know what you think!

Sam and Dean - Winchesters, Alpha hunters - for years they dedicated themselves to the life. But now that they're getting older, and still without mates, they're starting to go feral. Ruts happen more often, are stronger, and last longer. If they don't find mates soon, they will go feral, hurt a bunch of people, and die. So they do a spell, with Cas's suggestion, to find their true mates. They've always acted like they didn't want it, weren't interested, but there's no pretending anymore.

Following the tracking that the spell gave them - they track down Sam's True Mate first. Dean's more worried about getting Sam right than himself at the moment. The tracking leads them to a small town - a case is here, they quickly learn, vamps - by the time they figure out what's going on, they head to the nest, only to find a woman there, taking the head off a vamp, two other bodies at her feet. She’s a hunter - and a badass one at that, taken three vamps down on her own.

Dean's a little agitated, he needed some blood to help balance out the feral rut that's been burning him alive from the inside. Sam however, is speechless. His blood roars in his veins, pounding in his temples as his eyes lock onto her form. He knows - he can feel it with every fiber of his being - she’s his…his True Mate.

"Mega," he wines, taking a step forward only to fall to his knees in weakness, "Need you," he groans, before falling to his side and promptly passing out - the fever too high and rampant.

After quick introductions and explanations, Dean convinces her to come back to their motel. It just happens that she's in the same one, a few doors down. Dean drags Sam into the room, dropping him on one of the beds with a growl. He's getting too old to be dragging his giant of a brother like a sack of potatoes.

“I’ll get another room,” Dean offered, trying to move around her so as not to set Sam off, “I’ll check in with you in the morning,” he offered with a tight smile, nodding at her before leaving and closing the door behind him.

The next morning, seeing Sam’s much improved condition, Dean smiled before entering the motel room and seeing the Omega sat on the bed, a fresh claiming mark at her neck.

“Well, welcome to the team,” Dean joked, still keeping his distance from her as he knew Sam would still be testy over anyone coming near his Omega, “So listen,” he added a bit abruptly, “I figured you and her could snag a car, make your way back to the Bunker,” he explained to his brother, “I know you two need some time. Fresh bond and all. And I still gotta…you know,” he added sheepishly. Now that Sam’s rut had cleared, he could see how bad Dean was in it.

It was time for him to find his Omega.

Dean sighed as he put the Impala in park, looking through the windshield up at the large facility in front of him. When he and Sam did the spell to locate their mates, they looked up the locations to plan out their routes. That’s when they discovered that Dean’s True Mate’s location - was a psychiatric hospital. He couldn’t imagine why, but he hoped that maybe it was something he could help with.

He tried his best to compose himself, feeling weak and barely holding back from losing himself to his biology. Using his FBI credentials, he was led to a common room, the nurse pointing across the room to a woman sat along, staring out the window. Dean nodded to her and the nurse returned to her duties.

Dean gulped down the hard lump in his throat that threatened to burst into a growl. From the other side of the room he could smell her scent, climbing in and flooding his brain. He tried to shake it off, sweat forming on his brow from the fever, and he urged his body to move towards her calmly.

His scent hit her as she gazed aimlessly out the window. A warmth flowed through her and she closed her eyes, humming in content. She opened them once more, her gaze still outside, as she started gently rocking.

“‘Mega…” Dean breathed quietly, his eyes fluttering closed in small intervals as he approached and her scent got stronger. It was driving him crazy, but he had to be wary of his surroundings, wary of her. He had to stay calm. With long controlled breaths he finally reached his goal, pulling a seat opposite the Omega and huffing out a shaky breath.

She turned her head to look at him, her eyes gently rolling over his face and body before meeting his eyes once more. Her face was blank, but she looked pale and tired and afraid.

“W-who are you?” she asked, eyeing him warily.

Now he was here he didn’t know what to do. His brain was too full of other ideas. His cheeks had grown slightly pink from the quickly growing fever. “M-my name’s Dean Winchester,” he said quietly, “I…you…” he had to stop and clench his eyes for a moment, swallowing another hard lump in his throat, “You’re my True Mate.”

She looked him over once more, taking a deeper breath, before her eyes turned sad, “You’re dying too?” she asked, emotionless in features and tone.

Dean tilted his head at the question, frowning slightly, “Do you mean turning feral?” he had to gulp again, shifting in his seat as his body ached.

“I guess so,” she shrugged, “Too many meds to really know the difference.” She suddenly lurched forward, her elbows on the table as she looked at him intently and wide-eyed, “They say I’m crazy, you know? That what I saw wasn’t what I saw, but I saw what I saw!” she nodded manically along to her words, “You don’t need a crazy Omega.” she shook her head emphatically, looking down at her lap.

Dean jolted back in surprise at her small outburst, but his rational mind kicked in. He’d seen these places before and the meds they give patients, “I’ve seen a lot of things,” he offered, “So why don’t you tell me what you saw?”

“I didn’t do it,” she whisper-hissed, leaning forward on the table and glancing around the room before looking at him again, “He did, he came in and killed her, not me!”

Dean frowned again, his head jumping to ‘potential case mode’, “So, there was a guy?” he pressed her for more information, “What did he look like?”

“He was just a guy,” she shook her head, “B-but his eyes were weird,” she exclaimed wide eyed as if it was happening before her once more, “He killed her and he said I had to come with him because my Alpha was a very bad man. A-and then his eyes…” she trailed off, shaking her head and fighting back tears, “I got away, went to the police…b-but no one believes me.” she whispered sadly.

Dean’s body almost trembled with quickly growing anger. Someone or something knew what he and Sam had been doing. They hurt his Omega.

My Omega.

Mine.

“You’re not crazy,” he growled, quickly rising from his seat and looking down at her, “Omega, we’re leaving.”

She looked up at him in confusion, shaking her head, “I can’t leave,” she stated simply, “I’m scheduled for sterilization to stop my heat hurting me,” she explained as if it were a simple, everyday activity, “Doctor’s orders,” she nodded, turning back to look out the window.

The next thing Dean knew, he had his Omega in his arms and was standing beside the Impala. He was panting for breath and felt exhausted. He had some vague memory of a lot of snarling, roaring and punching Doctors directly in the face.

And now they were here.

“I’m gonna take you somewhere where you’ll be safe,” he breathed, looking down at…uh… “W-what’s your name, Omega?”

“Y/N,” she answered reflexively, still in an emotionless haze through it all, but relinquishing to her Alpha. “You shouldn’t have taken me,” she added, “The man with the eyes, I’ve seen him outside the window sometimes. And my heat is killing me. I’m a disposable Omega.”

“No,” Dean said suddenly and harshly, his arms held her tighter - his splayed out palms squeezing her. He bit back another growl, the scent of her heat crashing into him like a brick wall now his adrenaline fueled outburst was simmering down, “Never say that. You’re my Omega,” he pressed his forehead onto hers, gasping for breath as his body threatened to buckle as he grew weak, “Please…l-let me take care of you.”

She looked at the man, the stranger, the Alpha who had suddenly come in and tore her from her prison, like a knight rescuing a maid from a tower. She wanted to laugh at that, but she’d long ago lost her ability to emote.

They had kept her constantly medicated, to control her heat, her scent, her mind, her actions, anything they possibly could. But for some reason, something about him broke through her constant haze and made her want to just let him take charge.

“Okay, Alpha,” she agreed, just looking at him as she waited for whatever came next.

“‘Mega…” he breathed, voice breaking slightly from restraint. He held her so close, but not close enough at the same time. He could feel her warmth as he held her, her breath fanning across his lips. Some of that restraint slipped. He pressed his lips firmly into hers, the hairs on his neck standing on end as he hummed hungrily.

She pulled from the kiss, her hand gently cupping his cheek and turning his head to see several personnel searching the lot and searching for him, before one of them pointed at him and shouted for his companion.

“Right,” Dean stared wide-eyed before shaking himself back to reality. After ushering Y/N into the car, he quickly climbed in, the loud tire screeching of the Impala tires shortly following as Dean tore the car out of the lot and sped down the road.

When he said ‘somewhere safe’ before, he had meant the Bunker. The way his body was reacting right now however - aching, yearning, pleading to just touch her - he was ninety-nine percent sure he couldn’t last.

There was that motel just a few miles out though…

Y/N said nothing during the drive, her eyes out the window as before at the facility. She seemed still and calm, but also fragile and numb. But inwardly she felt trapped in her own head and unable to break free. She had dreamed about her Alpha, her True Mate, many times as had most people. And now that he was here, she was unable to even really experience it.

The next thing she realized, she was waking up in an unfamiliar room. She was somewhat dazed but her mind and body felt clear for the first time in a long time. She opened her eyes, sitting up slightly to two men at the foot of the bed she was lying in. One was the Alpha from before, the other a new stranger.

“I’ve healed and cleansed her,” Castiel explained, “But Dean-”

Dean had stumbled back, leaning against the wall as he eyes remained on fixed on Y/N. Castiel’s words were like white noise to him, he knew she was healed. If he thought her scent was powerful before, now with all the suppressants - and fuck knows what else - out of her system, it was like it had been turned up to eleven.

His head dropped back with a thud against the wall, his eyes clenching with a restrained growl. “‘Mega…” he breathed, his chest heaving and sweat forming on his brow.

She whimpered as her eyes set on him. She hadn’t felt a full heat in a long time and this one was especially bad. She knew it was him. She could remember their words, his touch, his lips.

“Alpha,” she called meekly, tentatively reaching up a hand in invite from her position on the bed.

“-Sh-she’s still in full heat,” Cas finished his sentence, taking a wary step back as he eyed the duo cautiously.

“Out,” Dean ordered, not even turning to address the Angel.

And Cas vanished.

Before Y/N could blink, Dean was there. His hands bunched in the back of her hair as he hungrily devoured her lips.

She moaned as they connected, his heat and weight soothing her ache and need. Her heart swelled, but a part of him also felt familiar, as if she’d known him all along. She pulled from the kiss, gazing into his eyes, frantic with need but also wanting to savor every moment. When she noticed how far gone he really was, she decided to let him take what he needed.

“My Alpha,” she whispered, kissing him once more.

There was a small rumble in Dean’s throat as his bloodshot eyes gazed directly back into her. He breathed, “Mine,” before his eyes fluttered closed and his mouth attached to her neck. He kissed and sucked a trail down to her collarbone, pressing his body into her as he fully mounted the bed and towered over her. He wanted to smother himself in her scent, every touch sending waves of need through him.

His hips rolled into her, his brain fogging as he quickly pulled at her shirt, ripping it clean off in one swoop before he hungrily mouthed at the swell of her breast.

She could feel the tremble in his muscles as he fought to keep the beast at bay, trying not to scare or hurt her. But she knew he needed more and she wanted to prove she could handle whatever her Alpha gave her.

“I won’t break,” she pleaded, pulling his lips from her body, “Take what you need Alpha, please,” she whispered desperately.

Dean’s eyes darkened, staring at her half-lidded before his hands moved fast. As he hungrily devoured her mouth once more, he quickly stripped them both of their clothes. His hands roamed her with need, quickly moving down to her center before two digits swiftly dove into her core.

He growled as he felt her slick, curling his fingers and pressing firmly into her g-spot, his eyes rolling back as she moaned in surprise. He quickly withdrew his fingers, moving to grab her hips and flip her onto her stomach. He hoisted her hips up to meet him, letting out a low moan as he rutted his painful hard erection through her folds.

She moaned wantonly, arching her back and presenting for him obediently. She purred, rutting back into him, desperate for her Alpha.

He moaned out, mouth hanging open longingly. “My Omega…” he growled lowly, positing the head of his cock between her folds and gripping her hips tightly, “Wanna knot you…” he growled again - hungrier - before slamming his hips forward with a loud grunt. She was perfect, tightening like a vice around him that he hissed blissfully, quickly pistoning his hips with choked huffs and growls.

She moaned loudly, panting hard as Dean set a brutal pace. His grip was tight, his cock filling her completely, slamming hard into her cervix on every thrust. She reached her arms above her, grasping onto the end of the bed for something to hold onto. Using the leverage, she pushed her hips harder back into him, lifting her head to groan out.

Dean leaned forward, his breathing quick and erratic as he pounded her. His lips grazed and sucked on her neck as he moaned, feeling the muscle at the head of his cock begin to swell. His grunts became strained as fought to keep his pace. “Cum on my knot, ‘Mega,” he demanded, releasing one of her hips to rub hard circles on her clit.

Feeling his knot swell she knew she was close to losing her mind. When his fingers found her clit, she stuttered and screamed as her orgasm washed over her, her walls clenching his throbbing length within her. Dean seemed to draw it out as her pleasure seemed to never end.

As her wall clenched him impossibly tighter, Dean roared through one final harsh thrust, holding himself as deep as possible as he finally came, his hot cum shooting deep and filling her. The hand still holding Y/N’s hip gripped bruisingly tight as Dean suddenly bit into her skin.

As her mind finally broke free of the haze of bliss, she realized he had positioned them on their sides spooning. Dean was nuzzling into the mark on her neck and humming, his hands grazing over her skin.

“Who was that man from before?” she suddenly asked, remembering feeling free of the medications and seeing a man there before he just wasn’t there.

“‘N Angel,” Dean mumbled, breathing in her hair and holding her tightly to him, “Cas. Healed you.”

Y/N smirked to herself, rubbing a hand over his forearm that was wrapped around her, “I see you’re still in caveman mode,” she teased.

He smirked with a small hum, not letting her go, ever.

Forevers:

@sis-tafics

@lyarr24

@calaofnoldor

@hobby27

@spnbaby-67

Dean Winchester:

@akshi8278

@jerkbitchidjitassbutt

[mxvladdy]

I have a prompt idea! The Brothers reacting to an MC that can regenerate after they die. Someone stabbed them? The wound will close in a bit. Did they fall from a high place and their body shattered? It’s all good, they’re body’ll just snap everything back into place as they’re conscious. We’re they poisoned? They’ll treat it like a stomach bug and be fine the next day. Funny part is MC could tell them the worst ways they died during their childhood in a lighthearted way which makes things more disturbing, especially since demon threats against them won’t work.

Ok first time I read this prompt I had a good laugh bc all I could think about was an MC that made that little squeaking noise those rubber chickens make when they inflate every time they regenerated lmaoooo. Could you imagine the pavlovian response all the brothers get if they hear a squeak? Like Lucifer would be trying to sleep and Cerberus finds one of his old chew toys and the fear it brings is legendary.

TW: Death, Blood, Injuries

Lucifer

When you first tell him he has no idea if it was a crude joke or not. You are so blasé about something that should traumatize you. He hates how you snort at his every threat. What good is blackmail if you don’t go for it?

He does not believe you at first. Just another little human talking big trying to impress him. He would keep a keen eye on you too, making sure they have no reason to get even so much of a scrape on their knee. Believe you or not he doesn’t need this program to fail. Then Belphie happened. Seeing your lifeless body made so many things happen in his mind he felt physically ill. He hadn’t felt like crying so hard since Lilith…

And then you sit up and crack your spine, like you were waking up from a nap instead of getting up after being thrown from the second story.

He-is relieved, and terrified. Were humans supposed to do that? He doesn't remember reading this particular ability in his father’s schematics. He believes you now nonetheless.

But he still doesn’t let you just go getting hurt whenever you feel like it.

“Absolutely not.” He shakes his head firmly. He is unfazed by your cute little pout and huffing.

“Lotan is friendly!” You try again pushing the form back at him defiantly. Lucifer picks it up again against his better judgment and scoffs. Friendly, if Lotan is friendly then Cerberus was a saint. “Come on what’s the worst that can happen? I’m out of school for a day or two if things get dicey.” You plead leaning up and over his desk. Ugh. He rubs at his temple in annoyance.

“The fact that you think skipping a few days of school because you became fish food as a minor hindrance terrifies me.” He drolls but picks up his feathered quill irregardless. You squeal in delight and hug him fiercely, managing to pull a smile out of him. They grab the liability agreement and run out the door already shouting for Levi to hurry up before Lucifer changes his mind. He chuckles leaning back in his chair. Fine, if they are happy… let it be on their head if it severs. Wait- could they regenerate from that? “Shit.”

Mammon

He believes you. Not because he takes their word for it but the first night on duty as your caretaker you fall out of his balcony window.

One minute they are having a heated argument about his unwanted duties, him hovering over you while you lean up against the railing refusing to break eye contact. Next thing he knows the old stone gives and you both tumble.

He has wings and catches himself. You- not so much. He can still hear the sickening crunch of bone meeting stone when he lays awake at night. The first thing he worries about is how much trouble he would be in with Lucifer that he failed again. He's a blubbering mess over your body swearing he would do better if they would just get up. Whatever you want it’s theirs if you just open their eyes.

And of course, you do. He won’t admit to the scream that erupts from his mouth when you ask him to swear on that deal or they are going to Lucifer as soon as they can feel their legs. He agrees readily, glad his hide is saved for now.

When you two become closer he figures why not make some money off of this little quirk. Enter the troublesome duo of grifters.

You whimper, hamming it up for the terrified looking demon glazing between your broken leg and Mammon wiggling his ring heavy fingers at them. “Look what ya did to my human.” He tuts. “What, ya don’t look both ways when riding.” He kicks at the upended bike by his feet. The demon sputters swearing that they did and neither of them had been in the way.

“Mammon~” His human sniffles flashing him a teary eyed pout. To the other lesser demon it looked like a plea, but Mammon knew it was a warning that your leg would start mending soon.

“Who do you think is gonna pay for this?” He goes in for the kill waving his free arm down at his human’s prone form. “You want Lucifer or Diavolo ta hear about this? Ya know this human is special to us.” The demon blanches and shakes its head. Terrified it threw its wallet at the avatar of greed and bolted leaving their bike and bag behind. Waiting for the demon to be completely out of earshot Mammon turns with a dazzling smile. “Damn,” He whistles, helping his human back to their feet. Already the bone and skin had mended leaving only an ugly red stain on the fabric of their uniform. “I think you just moved up the ranks of my most favorite things. Gonna rival Goldie soon if this picks up...” He opens the wallet and pockets the handful of cash in it, tossing the worn fabric to the street floor.

“Hey.” Mammon looks down at you. You were now scowling eying his pant pocket. “Don’t forget your side of the bargain.” He chuckles raising his hands in defeat.

“Alright- Alright. One stupidly expensive ice cream coming up.” He can't hide his blush when you hug his arm close to your chest, excitedly leading him back to the main street.  

Leviathan

Oh like in that one anime???

But really, he is the first to take your word for it. Finds it kinda neat. Not that he is going to test it. Who would he have to play with if you were just yanking his chain?

He listens to absolutely spine chilling tales of your little “mishaps” as a child. But you brush off his concern. Don’t worry about it! Makes for great stories. To tell right?

Of course, when he sees it first hand he forgets for a moment that you would eventually feel better. He left his tank open one night to clean out some debris gunking up the water pump. Damn things get stalled so frequently now. He turns his back for a moment to get a tool and the next he smells human blood in the water!

He scoops you out of the water before whatever fiendish creatures he holds in his aquarium can take a bite and gets you to solid ground. He is panicking hardcore, he doesn’t feel a pulse. He sees that they smashed their head, blood pooling sluggishly down your temple. You must have slipped on the wet tank edge and hit their head.

Just when he is about to name another Henry in your honor you pop up spitting out whatever water that had gotten into their lungs. They flash him a knowing smirk at his red-rimmed eyes and joke that they have a killer headache.

Nurse Levi to the rescue!

Levi checks in on you again, leaning over the edge of his tank. “D-don’t you move a muscle!” He shouts down to you. Squinting he sees a hand emerging from the mound of pillows and blankets inside his tub-bed. you shoot him a quick thumbs up before turning your attention back to his giant flat screen. “You sure you don’t need Barbatos or some pain meds?” He frets. He was close to just giving up on the pump and coming to take care of his miraculously healed guest.

“Levi I’m fine! Not even sleepy.” Your muffled reply wafts up to him. You push down some of the blankets to give him a relaxed smile. “See not even a scar.” You show him the side of their head that had been cut. Sure enough, nothing was there but a smoothed patch of skin. It lessens some of his panic, but barely. He knew internal damage was still a thing to humans.

Finishing up quickly with the pump he slithers back down to your side sheepishly. He had apologized what felt like a thousand times, but he was ready to drop a couple thousand more if need be. His looming causes you to look up from the anime you were watching. The flashing blue and yellow lights illuminate their calm gaze. None of the panic he felt seemed to transfer to you. “Want to join me?” You pat at the covers. “Waters warm.” You chuckle at their own joke pulling the blue covers down and away to give him room to join them.

“I-if you’re sure.” He stammers wiping at his face to hide his flush. You nod, patting the empty side again. He joins you snuggling close, he runs a hand where a gruesome scar had been not even an hour again. You nuzzle in close. His slightly cool fingers felt great on your skin before turning back to the screen completely nonplussed.

What a weird human...

Satan

Much like Lucifer doesn’t believe you. He has never heard or read about humans being able to do that. Will not believe them and gets annoyed by the “fake” stories you kept insisting were real.

The fact that a single human has such a vividly morbid imagination fascinates him, but he won’t divulge in your little fantasy. There is only so much foolishness he can deal with.

He forgets about it after a while and you stop bringing it up. If he doesn’t believe you so be it, he’ll find out one day surely, you aren’t exactly the most careful with your body. When he does find out it about does him in.

He had warned them of climbing on his bookshelves. He doesn’t have them tethered down or stable. He doesn’t need them to be. His shelves would never even dare to topple on him. But this weak little human takes his room as a personal jungle gym, climbing up him and his things for a book. They could just ask but Devil’s forbid they did something halfway intelligent.

You hear him fretting through the fog coating your senses. His fingers shakily poking at your crushed abdomen and legs all bent akimbo clearing broken. “Don’t be dead-please don’t do this.” He hisses about ready to use magic to put you back together again. You pull your strength and grab his hand before he can interfere with your natural healing ability.

He starts, green eyes looking down relieved and amazed at you. “Don’t.” You croak, already feeling your lungs and rib cage healing. “I’m good.”  

“You’re good!” He shouts voice cracking in exasperation. “I’ve seen the aftermath of Beel’s feeding rampages that have looked better!” You snort pushing his hands away to rest up on your elbows. Eh- he wasn’t exactly wrong.

“I look like a chewed-up burger huh?” You joke laughing at his stunted and slightly disgusted look. “I’ll be ok, just help me up? My legs are always tingly after healing.” Wordlessly he follows your instructions amazed at how well you are handling all of this. Were you actually human? You stand on wobbly legs bending and popping your joints. You give yourself a quick check over “Tada!” You give him two very bloody thumbs ups once you see that you are back to normal. “It’s all good!”

He shakes his head bewildered. “I-if you say so.” Satan wrinkles his nose looking at the mess of your clothes and his room. “Go wash up. I’ll get you a new set of clothes and work on this mess.” You nod already heading to his slightly cleaning bathroom. His warm hand wraps around your wrist catching you mid stride. “Don’t tell anyone about this ok?” He pleads. If anyone knew that he had been so foolish, he would never live it down.

You nod miming zipping your lips. “Betcha believe me know huh?”

He rolls his eyes turning to the task at hand. “Don’t push your luck, or next time I’ll leave you under a shelf.”    

Asmodeus

Believes you. You have never lied before so why do it now over something so trivial. Humans die all the time and if you say you can't then ok. He asks tons of questions about how you found out about this.

He doesn't like the stories you tell but doesn't find it off-putting how easily you talk about it. He's been around the block with mortals and they cope in all sorts of ways.

He cuddles you and coos over every story you tell then shoots off hundreds of compliments about your complexion. It's amazing how well your skin holds up to all the foolish actions of your past.

Even though he trusts you and your stories he still is super careful with you. You are not going to get hurt on his watch, absolutely not! Will patch you up if you need it all while gripping about your foolishness.

But accidents happen, and even the most watchful demon trips up sometimes.

Asmo tuts over you rubbing at the potion burning away at your flesh. "I told you the maroon bottle love." You hiss as the antiseptic hits muscle.

"Maroon and burgundy look the same, bite me!" He clicks his tongue and bites off the argument brewing within him. How can you not see how different the two colors are. You grouch some more while he works on getting the rest of his potion off your cheek. You had just wanted to use one of his acne toner, the one that smelled like cucumber and rose. He was preoccupied with his eyeliner but told you to just grab it from his shelf. He had a lot of bottles and a lot of them were definitely not for human use. 

You unfortunately just happened to pick one of them. The one you nabbed was a toner built for his stronger skin. It ate away at your cheeks and flesh of your palm on contact. It's burning and tingling making you yelp in surprise. Luckily for you, Asmo acted fast coming up from behind and knocking the toner-soaked cotton pad from your reddening fingers. He curses at you the whole way to his bathroom. Done with your right cheek and hand he nods in approval, seeing your flesh already knitting back together. "At least you have lovely bone structure. Ahhh~ I'm jealous!" He pokes a nail at the exposed bone of your cheekbone. The mending muscles and nerves almost growing over his nail before he could pull away. You quirk a brow.

"Want them? I'm pretty sure I could regrow my jawline before anybody would notice. " You shrug taking the washcloth from him to dap at your left cheek. Asmo laughs, it was a ridiculously tempting offer after all.

"Could you?" He taps at his own chin in thought. You glance back at him and sits on the toilet. In theory, you probably could. Hadn't happened...yet.  

"Ye- just give me a heads up first? And maybe some good booze to knock me out." You say only half-joking. Asmo nods eagerly, twirling a lock of soft tawny hair. He might take you up on the offer.  

Beelzebub

He doesn't want to know and he never wants to find out. He just likes you too much to see you get hurt :(. It gets to the point where you cannot bring any past stories of incidents (no matter how funny you think they are). If a story comes out be prepared to be carried everywhere by this gentle giant. If you won't cease your foolishness then he will.

Though he probably should have heard a few of the stories. Mostly the ones about poisons and inedible things you use to eat. A lot of his world revolves around food and he loves to share it with you.

He never heard you complain about the foods he had you try with him. It wasn't until Simeon and Luke tagged along did he learn the awful truth that he had been poisoning you almost every time you two went out.  

Takes him forever to get out of his head about it. You are clearly fine and never brought it up because you just loved spending time bonding with him.

You find him in the ally behind the restaurant. His massive form curled in on itself from where he sat. "Why didn't you tell me?" He rumbles hearing you approach to stand next to him. "I could have killed you." You sit squat next to him resting your arms on your knees.

"I mean...if we are keeping count it would be dead about eight times over by this point." You meant it to be funny but he groans in anguish pulling at his hair. You grab his fists and pry them from his scalp. "Hey! Hey!" You pat his knuckles, eyes filled with concern. "I'm still here right, still kicking and eating all these awesome foods, don't worry. Please?"  You can tell your words do not calm him but he doesn't pull from your grasp either. "If you are curious, all the foods that would have done me dirty just gave me some bad cramps and gas for the evening. Nothing a tum and hot tea couldn't fix." You fill the air with useless chatter, all while stroking his knuckles.

You really wish that Luke hadn't said anything. Simeon had read the room, his neat brown brows raising in astonishment as you sank into the meal Beel bought for you. But he otherwise stayed silent tucking into his own meal without a fuss. You couldn't completely blame Luke though. He was young and just looking out for you. Though, he-well- both of you could have handled it better. With him screaming and you screaming, it was a recipe for disaster.

Beel rises a few minutes later rubbing at his burning eyes. "Are you sure you are ok?" He checks in with you once more. You nod perking up as you see him grunt in acceptance. "Just let me know next time you can't eat something."

"But it tastes good!" You pout. He frowns not budging from his spot until he sees you sigh in defeat and agree. No more purposely poisoning yourself just for munchies. "Fine-but you are just saying that to get extra portions."  

Belphegor

He finds out when he kills your dumbass for believing him. It totally harshed his vibe.

Here he was getting an amazing monologue, reveling in his eldest's brothers' anguish and look of anger from the prince. He was ready to give his final performance and hopefully wipe the floor with that red-headed bastard plans to "commingle"

He tossed your "lifeless" body from him, taking a sick amount of pleasure in the way your body flopped down the stairs. He notices how the other brothers seem completely unfazed by your corpse at their feet.

Huh? Perhaps they didn't understand the actions he did. Or maybe they truly have given into the demons they had become. He stops his tirade only when he watches Asmo bend down and poke at your cheek. He didn't look sad, just merely annoyed. Like you were taking too long to get up.

But that is impossible. You would never get up again... 

Mammon rolls his eyes at his youngest brother's actions. Honestly, he loved the little edge lord, but this was ridiculous. He had a racket to go check on. His hand drifts down slowly to his pocket. If he just angled it right he could probably check his phone without looking rude. He makes eye contact with Satan and jerks his head exasperatedly at Lucifer and Belphegor going at it. The blonde shakes his head and shrugs. Slowly he inches closer so Mammon can go on his phone without getting caught. Covering for Mammon Satan looks around the room feigning interest.

Beelzebub and Leviathan seemed mildly more attentive to what was going on than him. The latter of the two eating it up like an arch in an anime, while the former was trying desperately to placate his twin. Asmodeus on the other hand was having none of this. He plops down next to your body turning your head to face him. He checks you over quietly ignoring the storm exploding out of his elder brother and the rest of the gang. "Honestly darling," He strokes the bridge of your nose, feeling the bone and cartilage shifting back into place beneath his finger. "is this a good time to ask if I can have your jawline?" He sees the corner of your lips twitch.  He leans in and whispers in your ear. "How long are you going to play dead?"

"Am I boring you, brother?" Asmo glances up from his position over your head. Belphegor looks down at his face apoplectic with rage at being ignored. "And I see you on your phone Mammon!"

"Shove it! I got shit to do!"

Asmo gets to his feet dusting off his pants and ruffles. He shrugs up at Belphie who was doing a great interpretation of Lucifer when angry. He was so much like Lucifer it was scary sometimes. "Sorry honey! Just check on my bestie."

Belphie snorts making his way down to the first floor. "Just checking I killed-"

You pop up grunting loudly as your spine reconnects. "Help your bestie up?" You raise a hand for Asmo who happily takes it. You turn your back to a dumbfounded Belphie and Lucifer, both not understanding what just happened.

"About time." Mammon sighs pocketing his phone. "I got some idiots we can swindle out of some grimm."

"Oi!" Satan butts in cutting Mammon off. "You had your turn! I have some spells they said they would help me test out."

You grin, not fighting it as the two tug at you like a toy between toddlers.

"Enough!" The two jump away from you at Lucifer's roar. You squeak in surprise when a firm leather-gloved hand spins you around so you could stand face to face with a fully shifted Lucifer. "You!" He runs his hands over you in disbelief. "How..." Your first conversation with him comes back to mind.

I can't die so try to threaten me with something else next time K?

"Would someone tell me WHAT is going on and why they are still breathing!" Belphie pushes through to you and Lucifer.

Beel grabs him up before he could get his claws into you again, stroking his dark hair like you would an angry cat. "It's a long story..."

[mosswillow]

Alone - Dark!Thor x Reader

Warnings: 18+ Adult content. Dark!, kidnapping, forced marriage, noncon/dubcon, oral (male receiving), violence, spit kink, Smut, Thor is mean af in this.

Summary: You’ve been hiding on earth for years after running away from an arranged marriage with Thor. What happens when fate brings him to your place of work?

A/N: This is part of the Synonyms series. You can read them as stand alones or all together. I encourage reading them in order if you want to read all of them but you do you. This is the idk fifth or sixth one I think.

Word count: 2k

All you’ve ever wanted in life is to be left alone. You ran from a life of luxury years ago, escaping from the expectations your parents and society had on you. The expectation to marry a stranger, to have his children, to spend your life in a gilded cage. You had to fight against a lifetime of brainwashing telling you that it was your place and your duty. You left in the dead of night shortly before you were to be sold off. You live on earth now, working at a bar and flirting with assholes for tips. You have your own tiny apartment and quiet life. You love it.

You hand a drink to a regular before turning to reach for another glass and pouring a beer. It’s been a busy night and it’s only just starting to slow down a little after 2am. Tomorrow is your day off and you can’t wait to catch up on sleep.

You almost don’t notice him walking in. If it weren't for his obnoxiously loud laugh you wouldn’t have looked over to the door. It’s Thor, your betrothed, the literal God you ran from. You stop working for a second before running to the back and hiding, having a mini panic attack. You didn’t think anyone was still looking for you. Sure, you knew Thor had left Asgard and now lives with the Avengers but you’ve never even come close to running into him. There’s no reason he should now be in your place of work.

“Are you ok Y/N.” Your manager says, cocking his head.

“I’m sorry boss, I’m just not feeling well.”

“Why don’t you go home, I’ll ask Amy to stay late.”

You thank him and get your coat, pulling on the hood and looking out at the room before walking quickly through the bar. You open the door and in your haste run straight into a wall of muscle. Thor grabs your shoulders and steadies you. You try to back away but his hands stay gripped to your shoulders, shaking them slightly.

“Y/N”

Fuck.

You look up into his angry eyes and give a smile.

“It’s… Thor right?”

Pain shoots through your shoulders as Thor tightens his grip.

“How did you find me?” You breathe.

“Twas luck. I walk in for a drink and there you are.”

You try to take a step back again and this time he lets you go.

“Ok, well it was good seeing you.” you say, preparing to kick ball change your way out of the state, or maybe planet.

Thor grabs hold of your wrist.

“You know I still have a claim on you.”

“You wouldn’t.”  

Thor holds you while he thinks. He reaches out to your face, cupping it in one large hand.

“It’s my right.”

You wrench your hand away and throw a punch, landing it on his jaw and sending him back several steps. He smiles and raises his hand, catching his hammer and fixing his eyes on you. You turn to run but don’t get far before he slams his hammer on the ground and you fall. Tears stream down your face as you try in vain to crawl away. He grabs you and turns you around, pinning you under him. Everything goes black as he punches you in the face.

---

The first thing you notice when waking is the metal cuff. You pull at it, crying out in rage when it doesn’t even bend. It must be made of something strong to hold you. You look around the large bedroom searching for anything that might help but find nothing. The door opens several minutes later, thor walking though it. You pull at the cuff as he slowly takes steps toward you.

“Don’t do this Thor, just let me go,” you beg.

“I’ve slept with many beautiful women,” Thor starts.

He reaches you, holding out his hand to feel the bruise on your cheek, the one he gave you.

“But none of them felt right, None of them were you.” He continues.

“No,” you cry.

“You belong to me Y/N, how dare you run away from that.”

“You’re one to talk. Where are we right now? Sure as hell not in Asgard.”

Thor’s eyes narrow as he leans in. “You know nothing of me.”

Thor gently strokes your face, moving his hand to cup your breast. He leans in to kiss you and you spit in his face, glaring at him with contempt. He backs away shocked before wiping the spit from his face.

“That’s not how this is going to go little lady, I’ll give back everything you throw at me.”

Thor grabs your jaw, pushing his thumb against the side and forcing it open. He spits into your mouth and you choke before swallowing.

“And I’ll make it ten times worse.”

“You say you had sex with lots of women but it never felt right? That’s weird because I’ve also has sex with plenty of people and you’ve never even crossed my mind. You’re just not all that memorable I guess.”

Thors entire body seems to grow as he storms across the room and grabs a key. He unlocks your hand and climbs on top of you, grabbing your wrists and holding them above your head. You’re used to being the strongest person in a room but now Thor holds you easily with one hand as you struggle in vain.

“I’m the only one you’ll think of again, soon you’ll be begging for me.” He says grinding against you.

He kisses you, sucking in your lip and letting it go with a pop. You flinch as he grabs your clothes and rips them off of you before tearing off his own. He flips you over with ease, pushing down between your shoulder blades and slaps your ass a few times. You cry out as he gives a sharp thrust, his cock stretching you out painfully.  

“You say no but your body betrays you…” You bring your hands to your face as he thrusts over and over. “... So wet.”

Thor lets out a husky moan as his cum pours into you. He pulls out and sits next to you on the bed, grabbing your torn shirt and cleaning himself off. You sit up, pulling the blanket over yourself and staring ahead in shock. He kisses you on the forehead and grabs your hand again, cuffing you in place.

“Just until you learn your place,” He says as he pulls his pants on and walks out of the room.

---

Thor isn’t gone for long. He comes back holding a tray of food and drinks. You reach out for a grape and he pulls the plate away, taking the grape and holding it up to your lips. You take a shaky breath, shouting at him in your mind and imagining yourself punching the smirk off his face. You open your mouth and he feeds you several pieces of fruit and cheese as you sit wordlessly on his bed, his cum still smeared all over your thighs.

“Can I use the bathroom please?” you ask.

Thor smiles and kisses your temple.

“Of course.”

He unlocks your wrist and you walk to the bathroom, relieving yourself and pulling on a bathrobe you find hanging beside the tub. You take a deep breath and throw the bathroom door open, running full speed out the door and through a hallway. Thor comes after you, yelling and cursing but you keep running full speed.

You run into a large living area where multiple Avengers sit watching tv. They all stand and run towards you, blocking your exit and you raise your fist. You recognize Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, and Sam Wilson staring at you, arms raised in fighting stances. Thor reaches the room as well and they surround you.

“You couldn’t have found one without super strength?” Tony asks Thor.

“I have no interest in human women.” Thor replies.

You kick Sam in the chest and he stumbles back, knocking over a lamp. Steve comes up behind you, grabbing you and you elbow him in the stomach, pulling him above you and throwing him across the room. Tony takes a step toward you but before he can throw a punch a woman comes up behind him and hits him over the head with a lamp. She stands shaking as Tony turns to her and grabs hold of her.

“Fuck, Sam get your girl before she hurts herself.”

Sam walks over to the woman, grabbing her wrist and pulling her away from the fight.

“No, I’m sorry Sam, please I’m so sorry.” She cries as she’s dragged away.

Thor throws a punch and you catch it but don’t see his other hand coming for your stomach. You fall to the floor coughing and he kicks you in the side.

“Jesus, Thor.” Tony says.

“Don’t underestimate her, she’s stronger than humans.” Thor says, grabbing your hands and pulling them behind you. You feel a pinch in your neck and the world goes black.

---

This time you’re not cuffed to the bed. You look around and realize that you’re in a windowless room. You push the wall, already knowing it will be made of something too strong for you to break. You walk around, opening up a dresser and rolling your eyes at the nauseatingly feminine clothing and explore a large bathroom.

“Tony helped make this for you,” Thor says, making you jump.

“Tell him fuck you for me.” you sneer.

Thor sighs and leans against the bathroom door frame.

“You won’t be getting out of here.”

You push past him and to the door finding it open. Behind the door is a small hallway and then a second door with a second keypad. Smart.

“It’s not forever. We’ve already found several incentives to help you feel more comfortable here.”

You turn to Thor and raise your eyebrow.

“How much do you care about the little bar you worked at?”

The implication sinks in.

“You would ruin innocent people's lives just to keep me here?”

“Darling, I’d do much worse than that.”

Thor pulls you by the waist to the bed, sitting down at the edge and pushing down on your shoulders until you kneel. He puts his hand under your chin.

“Open up baby.”

You clench your jaw.

“You will lose this game.” he says, gently coaxing at your jaw.

“Leave me alone!” you scream, tears falling in earnest.

Thor grabs the back of your neck, pushing you to the bed. He gets close to your ear.

“You want to be left alone dear? Ok, I’ll give you what you want. Call for me when you’re ready to behave.”

You hear both doors close and lock and scramble into the bed, folding yourself up into the fetal position under the blanket. You let yourself cry for hours before falling asleep.

---

You sit in your windowless room, knees pulled up to your chest and tears stains down your cheeks. You’re not sure how long you’ve been isolated at this point. You haven't eaten in days and feel weak, both physically and mentally. Screaming sounds stream into the room in random intervals so you’re always on edge and unable to sleep more than twenty minutes at a time. Every time you get out of the bed all the lights turn off forcing you to stumble in the dark.

Thor can punch and kick you, breaking and bruising you until the pain seeps into your bones. You’ll get up each and every time ready to fight. This however, this is so effective that it makes you miss him, it makes you want to cry in his arms and beg him to save you. You close your eyes and shed one more tear before calling his name. He walks in minutes later, approaching you and gently grabbing your jaw, his intentions clear. You open your mouth and close your eyes as he pushes his dick in, fucking your throat until he comes. He pulls you into his lap after, placing a blanket over you and holding you close.

You clutch on to Thor like he might disappear if you let go.

“Please don’t leave, I’m so tired.” you cry.

“Shhh, it’s ok baby, you can sleep now. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

You shake in his arms, slowly falling asleep despite the anxiety that fills every inch of you. He did this to you, made you terrified of the very thing you’ve always wanted.

To be left alone.

[cinnamonrusts]

together, we can make it out alive - 1

[a/n: originally posted on my Ao3 and I decided to revamp my series some with my updated writing techniques. Hope you enjoy.]

                                                                  ⋆｡˚ ⋆｡˚ ⋆｡˚ ⋆｡˚

*BEEPBEEP BEEPBEEP*

The electronic chimes from your alarm clock blared loudly in your ear. Groans escaped your dry throat as the clock stirred you from your slumber, "Not yet--," your hand fished for the large snooze button on the top of the clock. Five more minutes, that is all you would need. Well, five minutes came and once again the alarm beeped in your ear. Your eyelids slowly lifted as you read the blurry red digits that stared in your face. "3:45 PM", it read. "Shit..." you cursed as you knew that you needed to get up and get around for your nightshift turn.

Your legs swung around the edge of your bed as you stretched with a loud yawn. Daylight peaked in through your blinds and shined directly into your eyes, "I really need some black out curtains," you mumbled to yourself as you made a mental note. This was just your daily routine now. You slept in the morning after getting off work from the Raccoon City Police Department and woke up around 3:00 PM. Ate, exercised, showered, and relaxed all before you pushed pencils on the clock at your desk.

Don't get it wrong. It was a job and you were thankful, but your duties weren't exactly what you expected them to be after the headache that was the police academy. You didn't hate your job, you just didn't -- like it. Also, you really fucking hated Raccoon City. It was not the same place that you remembered as a kid, not to mention all the weird things that had been going on lately. You just really wanted out of there. Maybe go to a warmer city... like Los Angeles or something.

You pushed yourself to a stand and turned around on the balls of your feet to head to the bathroom. When you reached the shower, you turned on the faucet and ran your fingers under the warm water. Just as it reached the perfect temperature, your phone rang. You ignored it and waited for the voicemail to pick up. But it just rang again.

"I'm coming! I'm coming!" you yelled at the telephone as you stomped through your apartment to the device on the wall. "Hello?" you answered.

A familiar, yet unwelcomed voice barked from the other end of the line. "[L/N]! Where the hell are you?!" It was Lt. Branagh. "Home. My shift doesn't start until 10." your eyes rolled as you pinched the bridge of your nose. "Get your ass over to the station! We've had reports all day of violent attacks all over the damn city!" He couldn't be serious -- it was 6 hours now until your shift! "I don't come in until--," Branagh cut you off, "I expect to see you soon, [L/N]." the call ended.

You kicked the open moving box that sat in front of you in anger. It flipped onto its side and the contents spilled out onto the floor. It was a bunch of papers that you failed to file away and as you picked them up, you noted a familiar picture on top of the mess. The photo displayed two very recognizable faces that had smiles displayed happily.

You and Leon S. Kennedy.

He was your partner in crime during the police academy. Leon was the only one who didn't see you being a woman as a weakness. The two of you hit it off immediately after he introduced himself and complimented your skills.

On top of your heads were colorful party hats that seemed to be a bit too small. Both of your arms were slinked around his shoulders as you pulled him in for a close hug. His right hand was rested on your waist and the left held up a large mug of beer that was about to spill out onto the floor. Your thumb caressed the image of his handsome face and a smirk spread across your lips. You flipped the picture over and in faded pen was your handwriting: "Graduation Celebration! JULY '98"

Leon crossed your mind often. The two of you lost contact with one another after something happened between the two of you. It was as if that party happened yesterday -- the night that he kissed you. Your eyes closed and you could picture Leon's face perfectly - the way that his lips puckered and the way that they felt.

The two of you stood outside of the bar on that warm summer night. Leon was leaned against his shitty blue car that was wrapped in faded paint and rust. You stood in front of him with your arms crossed and your eyes focused on the clear sky that hovered above. Then the sensation of fingers over your skin drew your attention from the sky, to the man. Your gazes locked and his lids were half shut but a smile was on his lips. "Leon, you're drunk, aren't you?" you chuckled. His fingers wrapped around your bicep, "Maybe," he cooed as he brought you close to him. You could feel and smell his breath, it was warm and stunk heavy of booze.

With his free hand, he moved it to your cheek and tickled it lightly with his knuckle. Your [E/C] eyes stared deep into his moonstone ones, Leon's pupils dilated before they closed. His lips met yours. They were smooth but a bit chapped - he must be an avid user of Chapstick, you thought. The kiss was quick but meaningful. When he pulled away, you grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him in for another. When the two of you broke apart, you noted the way those moonstone pools in his head looked at you -- you could get lost in them -- forever.

The fond memories brought warmth to your heart that you lost the track of time. Pounds from beneath you interrupted your reminiscence. Your neighbor below screamed through the floorboards. "Hey, you fucking idiot! Stop using all the hot water! You're not the only one who fucking lives here!" he continued to pound and yell. "Shut up, you fuck!" you screamed back as you scrambled to your feet. Your clothing was stripped from your body as you dashed to the shower, and jumped directly into the lukewarm stream.

You knew that Branagh was most likely boiled over in anger because of how late you were already. Once you finished your shower, you pulled on your police uniform, styled your hair into a neat bun, grabbed a bagel, and ran out the door. Your car was parked pretty far down the road and rain began to fall from the sky. What a perfect start to the day. You shoved the bagel into your mouth and dashed for your car. The key slipped in your hands as you fiddled with them to get the door unlocked. Just as you grabbed the correct one, they fell onto the ground and so did your bagel.

"I've already had enough of today," you cursed and sighed to yourself as you bent over to pick them up. When you stood back up, a woman came from nowhere and threw herself onto you. She cried in panic and spoke incoherently. You noted the large wound on her shoulder and blood was seeped heavily into her shirt. "P-Please! Help me!" she grabbed onto your shirt with blood stained hands. "Ma'am!" you yelled and pushed her off of you for your own safety. She stumbled back and fell to her knee, "Let me call an ambulance!" you started to run to a nearby pay phone but she stopped you with a stutter that it was too late. "There's more of them!" her head turned in the direction of an alley to the left, then she took off from the ground in a haste. "Ma'am, wait!" you yelled as you watched her run away around the corner and into the city.

"Who's coming?" you whispered. With curiosity, you walked toward the alley that the woman had looked down but saw no one. Maybe she was one of the crazy people that were noted to be around the city and around the Arklays... If you saw her again, you'd probably call in some backup... the crazy look in her eyes... it unsettled you. You managed to shake the image of them from your mind and focused on getting out of the rain.

As you walked back to your car, you noticed the red stains that were now stained into your uniform. Whatever. You would worry about it after you made it to work. Once you got into your car, the radio started talking about more and more unrest that had spread more and more through the streets. Your finger pressed the power off, "Enough of that." the news was just the same and you just knew that you had to deal with it first hand once you arrived at the station, it just made it worse.

In front of the parking garage for the RPD were several cars that seemed to have been in an accident. Your car couldn't go any further than where you were at, so you hopped out of the vehicle to walk the rest of the way. People dashed around the streets in a panic and it seemed as if it were the apocalypse. You tried to flag people down to stop them but they all ignored you. What the hell is going on?! When you entered the station, there was even more chaos. Officers ran around like wild and some seemed to be injured as well. You felt anxious and confused by everything that was going on. What had gone on in your brief time away?

Phones rang, people yelled, doors slammed, and everything soon overwhelmed you, you could feel yourself going into an overload. But a strong hand on your shoulder was a saving grace. "There you are, [L/N]!" it was Branagh and a brief look of relief washed across his face. "I left a stack of paperwork on your desk. Sort through it and then you're going out on patrol. Some crazy shit is going down..." he gave you a light push in the direction of your desk.

As you walked to the back of the office, you noticed the banner that was spread across the ceiling in blue and yellow.

"WELCOME LEON"

Your heart pumped in your chest and you could feel your skin begin to turn clammy. There was only one Leon that you know of that was a cop. The man that you shared a kiss with and so many more feelings... Leon -- Kennedy? Was he actually on his way here? He always told you that after the academy he would eventually come find you in the city and be your partner again. You thought that it was just a joke -- but now, it didn't seem that way. How could he come here without saying anything to you? No call? No email? Nothing?

Your eyes remained on the banner and you asked your co-worker who sat on the desk beneath it, "Hey, Rita. Who's this, Leon?" She didn't look up from her desk, "I dunno. Some new guy from out of town. Last name starts with a K or something like that. Ask Neil, I'm sure he knows." You could feel a knot in your stomach and you darted to your chair. The desk that was across from you was normally piled high with boxes of paperwork, but now it was cleared off. You leaned over the divider and snatched the piece of paper on the desk. Your eyes darted across the text:

"Leon S. Kennedy, we're putting you on a very special case for your first assignment. Your mission is to... unlock your desk! The key to your success is in the initials of our first names."

The note confirmed it. It was indeed that Leon. You plopped back into your seat and gnawed on the nail of your thumb. Your thoughts were now consumed as to how both Leon and yourself would react when he arrived. You could see it now...

He would laugh with the other officers as they shot the shit with him. He would be in the center of the group, they would slap him on the back and tell him how happy they were to have him on the force. His gaze would eventually land on you and he would excuse himself from them. Leon would smile and show off his perfect teeth. He'd saunter over and slowly shake his head, "I didn't expect to see you here, [F/N]."

You swallowed hard but your thoughts were interrupted when the sounds of glass shattered right outside of the office's door.

The chatter and hubbub in the office halted as everyone's attention turned toward the door.  An officer who wasn't much older than you rushed toward the noise, he couldn't make out exactly what it was from behind the glass of the door but drew his gun in preparation. He looked back at the office filled with you and your co-workers before opening the door slowly. "Hello?" he called out. His gun was pointed out into the hallway but found that there was nothing there. Then a sound of something you had never heard before or ever would forget echoed loudly in the empty hall.

It sounded like a monster, there was no other way to explain it. It pierced through your ears and then the sounds of the officer's shrieks shook your core. A loud gurgle erupted from his throat as he was tackled by a person onto the floor. This - person, dug their teeth deeply into his throat and proceeded to rip it out. Bright, red liquid sprayed from the wound across the floor. Two male officers threw themselves onto the assailant and tried their hardest to pull him off but soon were attacked as well. Gunshots blasted off in the office which then were accompanied by more sounds of broken glass. The assailant dropped dead beside the officers on the floor and everyone exchanged glances of pure terror.

"More are out there!" yelled Branagh as he held his weight against the door to stop any more of these "people" from killing everyone his subordinates. "Pistols aren't going to keep us alive for much longer," Rita cried out. "But Irons insisted we hide everything else away, remember!?" your fellow officers shouted at each other as tension rose - fear and panic began to set in.

"I know where some are," you piped up. "I have the keycard for the weapons locker," you reached into your shirt pocket and pulled out a white, plastic card. "Perks of being the newbie, I guess. I'll go." you walked toward the back door but stopped when Branagh barked at you, "You can't go alone!" You shook your head, "I will be right back, I promise." you disregarded his arguments and with a deep breath, opened the door and took off on your mission.

The hall was dark and quiet, the electricity must had been cut out in this section of town. You swallowed hard and with your pistol in on hand with the flashlight in the other, you took quiet yet brisk strides down the long stretch of hallway. All you could hear was the sounds of your bootsteps and the groans of those things that lurked just outside of the fences that kept the building somewhat safe. You needed these guns, no matter what. Or you and your co-workers would end up just like those officers - dead. Your breathing was heavy and your heart raced which could be felt in your skull, "Easy girl," you spoke out, "Just a few doors and you'll be there."

Time was not on your side, so you took off in a sprint. The feeling of being so vulnerable next to a stretch of windows worried you as you could fall victim to whatever those things were at any time. They weren't exactly "things" they looked human and most likely were but maybe they were deranged with some sort of illness. But nonetheless, they were dangerous and deadly... Just as you feared, one of them crashed through the window. Their greedy palms reached for you over the broken glass and managed to snag you by your hair. You screamed in pain and terror as their strength pulled you in but when you pulled away, you only pulled them closer. Your pistol flew from your hands and slid across the floor, too far for you to reach.

Their bloody jaws snapped as they tried their hardest to sink their teeth into your soft flesh. You could feel their breath on your skin and you struggled but could feel your strength giving way to theirs. There was only one thing you could do and it was to grab the knife that was attached to the side of your right leg. Your fingertips were just barely able to reach the handle but with one quick lunge of your body, you grabbed hold of the weapon. The desire to survive charged your strength and you began to saw through the strands of your hair that were gripped tight in the clutches of the creature. Tears poured down the sides of your face as you sawed through the strands that were the barrier between you and certain death.

The creature was now halfway over the window and their hand still had your [h/c] hair in between their fingers, jaws still snapped at you as they begged to taste your flesh. You scrambled on all fours as you attempted to gather yourself so that you could press on. Your foot slipped on a large piece of broken glass which sent you across the floor, you then landed onto a large chunk of broken glass. The sharp piece embedded itself deep into your knee and you cried in pain as you held your leg close to your chest. The creature dug its nails into the tile floor and started to crawl toward you with dead eyes, and bloody teeth. You took several deep breaths as you prepared to yank the glass from your leg and with one last deep inhale, you yanked it out. You cried in pain but knew that you had to keep going, your muscle burned as it now was exposed to the air. You made sure to grab your pistol from the floor before you continued on.

Your sprint was now resorted to a quick limp but you managed to make it to the locker room. To your dismay, it was mostly empty besides a couple of shotguns and some ammunition. "Fuck! Fuck! This isn't enough!" you screamed as you pounded your fist against one of the lockers. Inside one of the open lockers was a weapons bag which you were able to fill with the lackluster amount of supplies. As you zipped up the bag, the metal door to the room opened and the sound drew your attention. Your pistol was ready and you limped around the corner to hide behind a row of lockers to hide from who or whatever it was. The room was dark but a flashlight flipped around the room, whoever it was, they were there to look for those guns or you. Your thumb slowly pulled the hammer back on the weapon and rounded the corner, "Stop right there!" you yelled.

It was a man and he seemed to be normal for the most part. He complied and raised his arms in the air. "Turn around!" Again, he complied and did a slow 180. Through the faint glow of his flashlight, your eyes caught a glimpse of a set of familiar moonstone pools.

"[Y/N]?!" his voice raised in shock. The entire city was faced with an apocalypse scenario or even the whole world for all you knew and the one person you run into is Leon -- Leon Kennedy.

He dropped his arms and grabbed hold of your, then pulled you into a tight hug. Leon smelled of sweat and cologne, the very cologne that you bought for him as a graduation gift. You breathed him in as it registered to you that this was real, he was really here. But you pulled away, "Leon, we have no time for chit chat. We gotta get moving, people need these guns!" you pointed to the bag that sat on the floor by your feet. As you tried to throw it over your shoulder, you winced in pain. "Here, let me get it." Leon attempted to take it from your hand but you paused before you surrendered the precious cargo, "I can trust you with this, right?" your grip was tight on the strap, "When have you ever doubted me?" he asked with a smile, "You don't want to know that..." your grip released as you responded but also pointed the fact that your leg was injured.

"Sorry to be a liability," you apologized, but Leon pulled you to his side, "Nonsense. I got this and you, just keep an eye out for zombies."

You led Leon down the hallway that you had your close brush with death in, the zombie, as Leon called it, was now gone. But when the two of you reached the door to the office, it was eerily quiet. Not a good sign. You pushed the door open to find the office void of any life, nothing but blood. Lots and lots of blood. Your heart hurt as you felt a pain in your chest, was everyone dead? The lifeless body of Rita laid on the floor with her eyes opened, her brown orbs were absent of the vibrant life she once had.

Tears welled in your eyes but as you turned to flee, you bumped into Leon's chest. A look of horror on Leon's face matched yours, "I-I left them not even an hour ago..." you cried into his shirt for a moment as he held you lightly with one arm. When you pulled away, you wiped your eyes and Leon took your hand from your face.

"I'm happy you're alive, [Y/N]," you examined your matured features and you did his. His hair grew a little longer than when you had seen him last and he examined your frazzled locks. Just as you opened your mouth to speak, a door behind Leon opened and shut. A man walked out from the shadows and into the light, it was Branagh. He held onto his side and you could see he was injured with his shirt heavily stained with what was most likely his blood.

Leon pulled his pistol out and pointed it at your superior while he had a protective hand on your arm. Branagh coughed a wheezed laugh and shooed his gun out of his face. He looked over to you and smiled, "Good to see you're still breathing, [Y/N]." The Lieutenant approached your male companion and placed a bloody hand on his shoulder,

"You must be Leon Kennedy -- well, son, welcome to Raccoon City."

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 2

a/n: lmao this is kinda weird for me but i think this was an interesting request so lets try it!

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

lowkey kyotani kentaro typa beat but you gotta squint (??)

also warning! angst!

anon request: Hii! I just read the seijoh manager headcannon you wrote, it made me cry so much, i love those seijoh boys so much, and you are such an amazing writer! I dont know if requests are open or not but i was wondering what would happen if the boys ever find out what happened to reader cha? If requests aren’t open or if you just don’t want to write about it, I completely understand! Thank you for your wonderful writing again! Stay safe!

the stageplay was *chefs kiss* like MY MANS IWA WAS SERVING LOOKSSSS

soooooo

this might get really angsty idk so just a warning in advance

anyways

i mentioned in the earlier part that no one really knew what happened to you

so this one is when they DO find out what happened and what theyre gonna do about it

so first off, kyoken was basically the only one who saw you that day and saw how badly you looked

the thing is, at that current moment, he didnt really know the reason why and what happened

he had theories that you got jumped or you just got into an accident 

but he was prettttttyyyy sure you got beat up

so you went home and rushed to yanno, take a shower and get your wound treated and cleaned so that it would heal bc you really cannot afford to let the boys see that

they would think of the worst at the smallest sight of blood on you and you really didnt want to deal w that chaos at the moment

you cant let them get suspended from school since they were going to interhigh soon and you cant let oikawa and the boys ruin their reputations just for you

a first year girl theyve just met

it was kinda hard to rinse all of the milk from your hair but you were able to at least get the smell out and clean up your mess

then you looked in the mirror and saw faint handprints around your throat from that girl miyo and you cringed as you touched it

‘jesus christ, seriously what does she eat? bricks?’

after your clothes were in the wash, you went to bed to get homework done and also looking up how to use the concealer to hide your bruises 

you didnt really own any makeup but your mom has some so you could just use that

during dinner, you wore a turtleneck to prevent any suspicion from happening but you couldnt really hide the big gash on your face

‘y/n, what happened!’

‘i was dumb and accidentally fell up the stairs’

your parents shared a chuckle bc theyve actually seen you do this before so it was easy to believe the lie

‘darling, do we need to get you glasses? it seems your sight has worsened’

‘haha’

you went along with the joke but you weren’t eating and just pushed your food around

‘y/n? is the food not good?’

your mother asked but you shook your head with a convincing smile

‘its good! i just had some meat buns with the team earlier and i ate a lot so im still full’

you cursed at yourself for making it sound so rehearsed but you were relieved when your mother nodded

the next morning, you were satisfied with the reduced puffing of your face and you snuck into your parents bathroom where her makeup bag would be

as you held up the concealer, you started getting anxious because this was not the same shade as your skin and it would definitely raise suspicion if you had a different color on your neck than the rest of your body

you already planned to blame your wound as acne that you accidentally scratched but what were you going to do with the handprints?

the website you read said that it would take at least a day for them to fade

so you decided youd just wear a scarf and pretend you were cold

kunimi was confused as to why you had a scarf bundled around your neck and his eyes even widened at the sight of the bandaid on your face

‘y/n! what-!’

he shot up from his seat and your eyes widened before hissing at him to sit down

‘what happened to you?!’

he worriedly asked but you waved him off with a small smile

‘acne. this was the only available bandaid in my house so i had to work with this’

kunimi might be a lazy little shit but he was observant

and he noticed the way you said that sentence

it was like a robot

like a robot programmed to say what was written on its script

but before he could press on further, you already pointed out that the teacher was coming in and to hush so you could listen

the entire time, kunimi was awake alright, but he was too busy looking at you and a bright red thing that poked from the edge of your bandaid

kindaichi went to your classroom for lunch and you had to repeat your excuse for him but he pointed at another thing

‘why are you wearing a scarf? its like burning in here’

you didnt look at him as you just opened your bento

‘being in your period causes your temperature to fluctuate and cause unexplainable chill at even the hottest places’

okay what

they both shared a look and just shrugged, blaming it on your time of the month for the way you spoke with no emotion in your tone

this had to be the longest school day of your life

the whole time the scarf remained on and kunimi cant help but notice your flinches at the smallest of sounds

finally practice arrived and you really thought you could pull this off until oikawa barreled straight towards you and hugged you tightly

‘y/n-chan! you okay?! oikawa-senpai was so worried for you!’ 

you cringed but nodded

‘im okay, oikawa-san’

‘senpai, y/n-chan! call me senpai!’

‘im not going to feed into your kink, oikawa-san’

*cue everyone busting a lung*

‘y/n, what’s the-’

‘acne. only bandaid available in my house’

eventually, everything was fine

you were still cracking jokes w the others and you were still laughing w them so kunimi and kindaichi were at ease

but that shattered when oikawa was being oikawa and was being all touchy and bothering you about the scarf around your neck that he ended up pulling it off and he saw the marks

he was silent, just staring at them

ofc you were freaking out and you started breathing heavily

oh god he found out and he was going to hurt them

‘o-oikawa-senpai, listen, it’s not what it-’

‘y/n’

his voice made your eyes shut in fear and the others crowded around you and they all had scandalized looks on their faces

‘is this why you werent in practice yesterday?’

his voice was sharp, a complete opposite to his normally cheerful tone

you shivered and sighed

‘senpai, please dont-’

‘who is it?’

the other third years shared a look bc they were truly shook at oiks voice

‘w-why should i tell you?! its none-’

‘i am your captain and i deserve to know who is pulling you away from your managerial duties so he could just give you these damn hickeys!’

the gym turned silent

you stopped then furrowed your eyebrows

‘hickey? what-’

‘dont act like you dont know, y/n. so just be honest and tell me who’s your boyfriend’

lmao i shouldnt laugh bc this was supposed to be sad but im cackling at how dumb oikawa really is sometimes

‘i-i,,,,’

you stuttered but you knew this was the perfect opportunity

you could just blame it on this ridiculous misunderstanding 

its a difficult hole to get out of but it would be easier than the other

so you pretended to be flustered and turned around to hide your face

‘it was a one-time thing, oikawa-san. i promise it wont happen again’

HELLO WHAT

the team was leaking the feeling of RAGE

how dare someone take their manager!

she was theirs!

and it doesnt help that every player might have a little thing for you

is this really turning into a harem

oikawa kept demanding answers but iwa hit him enough to quit and they finally went back to practicing but they were still distracted

every time they looked at you, they would grow flustered and red and end up missing a block or a serve

they just cant see their baby manager like that

you noticed it quickly and irritably got on them

‘stop staring at my neck and get back to practice!’

they flinched and saluted at you

lmao this little first year girl is able to control nearly a dozen <5′10 men who are all older than her

but you were glad that they finally stopped asking about it

this was going to go by smoothly and you were going to be okay

however,,,

several days later,,,

this is an angst fanfiction so i will bring thy angst

you were taking out your class garbage since it was your group’s turn in cleaning the classroom when you were grabbed by the arm on your way back

it was still outside and after school so it wouldve been an unlikely situation that someone would help you

it was that biatch miyo again and her 2 minions behind her

then you recognized one girl from the track team who was actually a year older than you but you saw her dropping off some files in the office

if you tried to run, she could easily grab you w her fast legs

great

you were stuck

you let out a tired sigh and crossed your arms on your chest

‘what is it you want from me, again?’

she smirked

‘you really dont know how to listen, do you? i told you to stay away from oikawa but youre still flaunting around with him!’

is she serious?

this girl was borderline stalker/yandere type of girl

you gave her an incredulous look and frowned

‘girl, do you hear yourself? you damn crazy and im leaving’

but she grabbed you back and shoved you against the wall

but this time, you kicked her on the chest to make her fall on her flat booty

surprise was written on their faces and you stretched your arms in front of you to symbolize distance

‘one more step and ill beat tf out of you. i just got my nails off so id watch it if i were you’

miyo huffed and stood up, brushing herself, glaring at one of the girls who tried to help her

then she remembered what you told her

‘hmm? if you hit me, you could be kicked off of the team since you hurt another student. so, go ahead, little kouhai’

she was right

even if it was self-defense, the school’s disciplinary section sucked and just suspended or kicked off people left and right even though they didnt do anything wrong

you were stumped

you were here on a scholarship, not on tuition

your mom would KILL you if she found out you got into a fight and got a record

but you didnt show that and kept your tough facade

‘dont challenge me. i could be a crazy bitch and i dont think youd like your little face being all messed up. so watch your mouth and leave me alone’

you turned to leave but she grabbed your hair and tugged it back

lmao flashbacks to the other part

she twisted your hair into a ponytail and had a firm grip while a girl kicked you behind your knees so you would fall to the ground

oh no you were done w this

you elbowed miyo on the stomach the hardest you could and she groaned which loosened her hold and you kicked her again to the ground

some other girl hit your side and you winced before slapping her straight across the face bc you didnt want to punch her and hurt your knuckles

but they were really testing you

the last girl still had your hair but you twisted around to face her and just did the last you could think of that would hurt

hit her right between her legs

you finally escaped their hold and miyo lunged after you

‘oh my god leave me alone!’

you yelled before holding up your arms to protect your face but she scratched your arms 

obviously you were losing this bc it was just you but you were going to fight as much as you can

‘bad kouhais need to be punished! your senpais need to teach you a lesson!’

miyo screeched and you grabbed her arm before punching her straight at the boob

sorry rebecca

however, one girl was smart and did the same thing you did to her knees and made you fall to a kneeling position and eventually made you curl into a fetal position

gurl we actually fighting so hard considering we’ve never been in a fight

they continuously kicked you before miyo pulled up your head so you could sit up and kneel in front of her

ofc you tried to grab at her and punch at her

but these other girls were able to catch you and trap your arms in their hold and had their feet on your legs so you couldnt kick

great, another bathroom scene

your arms were bleeding from miyo’s scratches and your sides were hurting after their kicks

you lost and you were already bleeding in places you didnt think you would

this would be the last attempt and if he doesnt come, you’re done for

‘IIIIIIWWWWWAAAAAAAA-SAAAAAANNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!’

your scream echoed throughout the entire are

possibly could be heard in new york

and your voice became hoarse

ofc the girls were surprised and caught off guard but when there was silence and clear that no one was coming, they started laughing

‘oh, so cute! iwa-san? is that supposed to be iwaizumi-san? heh, you whoring around w him too? thats so cute-’

‘LET. GO. OF. HER. NOW.’

I GOT CHILLS

the girls holding you shrieked and dropped their hold on you before scrambling back causing you to drop to the ground

miyo’s eyes were wide and there was horror all over her face at the voice of that infamous boy

kyotani kentarou

‘WHAT THE FK ARE YOU DOING?!’

he yelled and miyo turned around to be met with his piercing eyes before screaming and running away with her minions in tow

‘YEA RUN AWAY! FKING COWARDS!’

ltr the cursing is so awkward for me to do but this is his character and im just so awkward so sorry!!

you coughed and winced at the pain on your side which caught his attention

again, he noticed you as the manager of their team and you’ve been hanging out w him, well, just him staring at you, at the alley while you feed the animals

you were actually nice and caring and definitely didnt deserve this

‘oi, y-you okay?’

you didnt look up, just closing your eyes in pain and biting your lips to not let out the crying

his eyes softened at you and he noticed you were trying to act tough and brave even though you just got beat up

normally, he wouldnt even help anyone but it seems you just did something to him

he sighed before gently picking you up, you not even bothering to stop him, and he held you tightlyin his arms as he carried you to the nurses office

he had a feeling you didnt want to be seen like this and hes been in the nurse enough to know she actually leaves the moment school ends

you let out a shaky breath as he set you down on the cot and you opened your eyes to reach your hold for him when he went away

‘n-no, don’t leave-’

but he grunted softly before holding your wrist

‘im just getting your damn medicine. chill out’

lowkey getting bakugou vibes

you nodded and went to close your eyes again

kyo returned w some pain relief medicine from his bag that he carries 

babie actually gets into fights often and he needs it sometimes

and he had alcohol medicine kind istg and bandaids for your arms

it was silent as you drank the pills and he sat down next to you so he could treat the wounds

but he let his curiosity take over him

‘why the fk did you let them do this to you’

he grunted and you scoffed with a smile

‘let? more like overpower me and grip me as they just hit me’

‘cant you fight them back?’

you glared at him

‘bruh i literally kneed some girl in their cooch but they just some superhuman typa girls that cant be hurt’

he sighed

‘maybe you just werent strong enough’

okay listen here you lil shit

you didnt want to listen to him scold you anymore so you just went back to closing your eyes

but kyo is actually lowkey nosy so he kept asking questions

‘the first time we met. was it her too?’

you flinched in surprise

‘you remembered that?’

‘ofc i did. you looked like shit. not as bad as this but still like shit’

‘gee thanks, stranger-kun’

‘kyotani,,, kentarou’

you smiled

‘nice to meet you, kyotani kentarou. im l/n y/n’

‘i know’

he mumbled but you didnt catch it

‘thanks for hearing me and coming to help’

he hummed

he wasnt going to tell you that he actually heard the scream for his idol and thought hed be there so he ran to go see him but instead saw you

kyo just respects and looks up to iwa-chan so much it warms my heart uwu-

once you were all patched up, you were finally able to stand but you still staggered

he grabbed your arm softly and sat you back down

‘what the hell are you going to tell the team?’

you paused then sighed

‘i dont know. ill figure something out’

but he knew how observant the players would be and they would catch on

after all, he was there watching at the top bleachers as oikawa yelled at you for the ‘hickey’

‘if they didnt hit your face, you could get away with it. but you have wounds all over you and theyd find out. im guessing youre doing this bc you dont want to trouble them or burden them? bc they would do something about it?’

you just stared at this guy

‘how-’

‘just a guess’

he also wasnt going to tell you that he was actually part of the team but the constant fighting got him in suspension

and the fact that his parents were donors for the school, he only got a tap on the wrist

‘so what do i do, then?’

‘tell them-’

‘no i cant do that! another plan, kyo-kun!’

‘oi, im a second year, idiot. treat me with respect’

the irony bc he totally treats oikawa like trash

‘i just,,,, oikawa-san is seen as this prince/gentleman type and i know how protective he is towards me so the slightest problem could cause him to be ballistic. miyo is popular enough to circulate rumors about him and hes already in his third year and she is too so i just have to endure one year until theyre gone’

kyo was disgusted

all this for that stupid idiot captain?

‘youre dumber than i thought’

you weakly hit him at the arm

‘so mean, kyo-san’

‘i dont think its right youre suffering for someone who isnt even worth it’

you glared and linked your fingers together

‘im the manager. i knew this would happen the moment i signed up but i didnt care. as manager, i have to keep up the team’s image and their popularity for support so i cant let all that be ruined just bc a little first year girl couldnt fight for herself’

‘just tell them, kid. less problems’

then he stood up to leave

‘kid?! im only a year younger than you! what you mean!’

but you were panicking

someone knew about you being hurt and they could easily tell the team

and it only increased when he entered the gym and later introduced himself as a player

you were so surprised that you stopped breathing

‘kyo-san,,,’ 

you muttered and he glared at you

well, more like look at you but i have a theory that kyo actually has problems w his sight so it looks like he’s glaring at you constantly but hes just actually trying to see clearly

‘yo’

oikawa was surprised at this interaction

‘eh? you know kyoken-chan?’

you nodded, still looking at the blonde

‘i-uh’

‘its none of your business’

kyotani grunted and you sighed in relief

maybe your secret would be safe

you were still uneasy about him accidentally revealing it, especially since he practically worships iwaizumi-san, but he kept his mouth shut

your caring personality at first was overbearing on him but he appreciated your efforts like volunteering on helping him with his eyeliner or asking him if he needed help with his medical tape

ngl, he also thought you were there just bc it was a team full of guys and you thought you could have that weird girl fantasy of having a harem

but you cared for them like practically a mother and continuously made it clear to oikawa that you were NOT interested in going on a date with him

you werent annoying, you were nice, and you weren’t pushy so he actually showed you respect and took a liking to you

this created a soft of protectiveness around you

sometimes, he would see you around school and he would practically glare at the girls he knew hated you

and when he wasnt there to protect you, you would call him to the nurses office where he would mumble apologies of not being there while patching you up before he would go over and threaten them to touch you again and he would bite their fingers off

aww hes so cute

ofc he still kept your secret bc it wasnt his business to tell 

until that one day

it was normal practice with you helping the boys toss the balls so they could spike it

iwaizumi spiked it really hard making you flinch and he apologized profusely after you almost fell off the chair you were standing on in surprise

‘im just angry that that damn shittykawa is the captain and is late to his own damn practice’

oikawa? late?

that was unheard of

you were about to get off the chair and look for him when the devil himself entered the gym with the devil’s mistress on his arm

miyo was holding on to his arm as he laughed at something she said and ruffled her hair

you dropped the ball and kyotani quickly moved to you so he could stand in front of you protectively

‘oi! shittykawa! youre late!’

oikawa just smiled and pointed at the girl

‘miyo-chan made us cookies, iwa-chan!’

at the mention of food, the boys ran forward but you and kyotani remained at the side at the infamous name

you got off the chair and hurriedly placed an arm in front of him

‘don’t, kyo-san’

‘the bitch-’

‘i know. but please, dont’

you begged and he huffed before aggresively wrapping an arm around your shoulder

aggressively cares for you

‘if she does something or even talks shit, i will-’

‘kyoken-chan! y/n-chan! come here!’

oikawa called but kyotani snarled at him

you smile wobbled when miyo’s eyes narrowed at you and she smirked

‘oh? your manager is so cute, oikawa-kun!’

the rest of the team was just blinking at this weird tension

kyo had his arm tightly around you and hatingly glaring at this girl, who was icily smirking at you, and you tightly holding kyo’s shirt with a worried glint in your eyes

‘you were late to your own damn practice, oikawa. stop wasting time eating this shit and go back to playing’

tbh it still shocks you at how rudely kyo talks to oikawa but you were too pre-occupied on making sure this kid wasnt going to lunge at this girl

‘a-ah, right. oikawa-san, we have to return to practice. if you excuse us, miyo-san-’

you were about to gently grab oikawa’s arm to bring him back when she grabbed your wrist and secretly gripped it

‘oh, dont be so uptight, y/n-chan! i worked so hard-’

but kyo immediately snatched her hand away from you and squeezed it as tight as he could, making her wince

oikawa noticed the pain in miyo’s face and he was angry that kyotani was hurting a girl

‘oi! kyotani!’

he shouted and pushed him away, making the team, even iwa, worriedly look at kyo and brace themselves for the beating

iwa jumped into action and held the second year back while you jumped in front of oikawa

‘kyo-san, calm-’

‘you! be quiet’

he shouted, finger pointing at you

‘and you!’

before pointing to oikawa

‘you are a shitty captain’

‘kyotani!’

iwa was just straight out confused and hes really questioning life decisions right now

mom is stressed and confused, i repeat, MOM IS STRESSED AND CONFUSED

oikawa’s eyes narrowed but he just calmly talked

‘we’ll talk about this later’

‘miyo-san, we really need to practice so if you could see yourself out’

iwa gently smiled to the girl, who was about to protest, but makki and mattsun has already pointed to the door

she huffed then turned to leave and once she was gone, iwa let go of kyotani

‘kyotani, what the hell was that’

oikawa lowly asked and you were about to put your arms out to separate them but yahaba and watari grabbed you so you wouldnt be caught in the middle

then kyo turned to you, fire in his eyes

‘either you tell him or i will’

can we just talk about how protective kyo is?

you trembled and you roughly left yahaba and watari’s grip so you could gently place your hands on his chest

‘please, kyo. just leave it, okay? remember, it’s my busi-’

‘if i see that bitch enter this gym again, i dont give a flying fuck if shes a girl. ill beat the living daylights out of her’

‘kyotani kentarou, what-!’

oikawa shouted but your glare shut him up

‘y/n-chan, what is going on’

‘n-nothing. kyo-san is just, yknow, being him. you know? okay. now lets get back to practice, everyone!’

coach irihata and the other guy sharing that look

to say the least, miyo was pissed

and when she was pissed at you, she always did what she normally does

she corners you wherever its deserted and beat you with the help of her minions who holds you down while she slaps, hits, or kicks you

girlie you needs to tell the boys youre literally getting hit and abused and im just-!!!!!!!!!

and thats exactly what she did

only this time, she wore hard-tipped shoes

‘see, y/n-chan? i saved up and got these shoes just for you!’

the minions were just sharing looks of fear and genuine sympathy for you

they were only there bc she blackmailed them with pictures doing questionable things and if they dont help, they would be released

as usual, you didnt cry, biting your lip as you winced from the pain of her kick at your side

‘youre so pathetic. how could you do this to a person? and all this for your oikawa-san? for a boy?’

you wheezed at her causing her eyes to flare

‘HAH?! SAY THAT AGAIN!’

‘i said-’

but you were cut off when she slapped the soul out of you

her ring cut you at the lip and you cringed at the taste of blood from your lip

‘what else? we gotta hurry this up, miyo, because practice started like 5 minutes ago and im going to get yel-’

‘SHUT UP!’

kyotani entered the gym after his talk with his teacher and immediately looked around for you

his honey brown eyes scanned the area and they widened as your figure wasn’t in sight

‘oi, yahaba, wheres the manager’

the boy shrugged from the side 

‘i dont know. shes late though’

oh god

‘kindaichi! kunimi! youre in the same grade right? did you see where she went after class?’

kunimi paused to remember before answering

‘she stayed after to talk to obe-sensei for the homework, that’s all i know’

that meant she stayed behind and was probably somewhere

‘SHIT!’

he shouted before bolting out the door

ofc the boys were all worried of his outburst and started yelling after him

‘kyotani!’

‘kyoken-chan?!’

they followed him, who was running as fast as he can

the girls would probably do it outside to avoid having to clean up their mess and he almost wrenched the door open in a hurry to take a lap around the school building

it was certainly a sight to see: a boy with dyed blonde hair and two brown lines followed after an entire volleyball team who were screaming after him

‘YOU-!’

he heard that bitch voice and bolted towards the back, where the dumpster was, and found you at the same position like the first time he saw you

blood was dripping on the floor from your busted lip and a cut on your cheek while your eyes were wide at the sight of kyotani’s panting form

‘kyo-!’

‘kyotani!’

your eyes watered at the sight of the entire volleyball team behind him, also eviqualiently surprised yet fuming angry

the girls who held you dropped your arms and ran for the hills so they wouldnt get caught

kyo pushed miyo aside as he grabbed you from the floor and held you

oikawa gave miyo a look that cannot even be described in words

all it was: incredibly, super, ridiculously, heatedly, furiously, angry

now multiply that by the entire team

‘hm, my father, who is the chieftain of the police, mentioned about there being jail time for even minors who commit serious acts like assault or bullying’

mattsun seethed

‘really? i think he’d like the video as evidence against kenta miyo for assault and battery, including bullying, so how many years would that add up to? nearly a decade?’

the girl miyo squeaked as oikawa and iwaizumi roughly grabbed each wrist

‘how long’

miyo trembled at the increased pressure on her wrist

‘IM ASKING YOU A FUCKING QUESTION! HOW LONG!’

iwaizumi has never shouted at a girl before and hopefully, it would be the last

‘s-s-since l-last month’

you burrowed your head in kyotani’s shirt

‘please dont’

‘shut the fk up, y/n-chan, we’re not talking to you right now’

oikawa coldly reprimanded

‘everyone, take y/n away. iwaizumi and i can take care of this. but mattsun, makki, track down those 3 girls and find others who have even touched our manager’

‘got it, boss’

if it was in a different situation, you wouldve applauded oikawa at his ability to be a leader but you were currently in pain from the bruises and the cuts all over you

your fellow first-years were angrily punching things in the nurse’s office

rip nurse in the morning when she finds holes all over her walls

the irony is, the most agressive one, kyotani kentarou, was the calmest as he quietly cleaned your wounds and placed ointment on the bruises

‘i told you so’

he mumbled and you scoffed

‘howd you find me anyways?’

‘dumb bitch yaps really loud’

he answered

no one was yelling at you and no one was saying a word

eventually, oikawa and iwaizumi entered followed by the rest of the third years

‘why. why didnt you tell us, y/n?’

oikawa asked as he sat down on the chair beside the bed

you looked down and fiddled with your fingers

‘if i did, you wouldve hurt her. and she wouldve spread rumors about you and ruin the image and reputation of the grand king and the volleyball team. i didnt want to do that to you and thought i could just endure it one year since youre graduating anyways’

iwaizumi sucked in a harsh breath

‘you wouldn’t have known what we were going to do. you are no oracle and you dont know how we are going to handle this situation. so you were really stupid for keeping these things to yourself, y/n. you may be our manager and our caretaker but let us take care of you too’

you nodded but your tears fell

‘sorry. im really sorry. i didnt meant to trouble you’

‘stop apologizing, y/n’

‘sorry’

‘y/n!’

you bowed your head low and bit your lip in guilt

‘i shouldve told you but i didnt and now everyone is troubled-’

‘we’re a team, y/n. youre not a lone wolf anymore. you have a pack standing right beside you’

watari mumbled and he sat down to give you his favorite hug: the one arm hug

‘im super angry right now and it might seem like im snappy but i really want you to know, y/n, that i really love you and i am just hurt that you didnt trust us enough to tell us you were suffering when i trust you with my entire being. so next time youre hurting or in pain, dont you dare keep it to yourself. tell us, okay? tell your senpais and friends about it so we can share that burden’

oikawa babie you are so mature like what-

what started out as a hug from watari turned into a team hug around the tiny bed, even kyo joined, and you were so happy you found a good team that appreciated you and everything youve done and accepted you as one of their own

‘oikawa-san, what did you do to miyo?’

‘again, im mad y/n-chan, so please dont talk about her right now’

‘iwa-san?’

‘dont use those puppy eyes on me! dont you dare-- okay, we’re pressing charges’

silence

‘WHAT?!’

‘and iwa-chan slapped her!’

‘WHAT?!’

‘shut up shittykawa you did too!’

‘WHAT?!’

a/n: this hurted a bit and im sorry if this was lowkey awkward and all over the place but i didnt exactly know how to portray this situation since ive never experienced this, just bullying in general, before but for those who have, please tell someone so that you dont have to carry that burden by yourself. it doesnt have to be a your parents, but talk to a trusted adult so that this type of stuff doesnt happen to you bc you truly dont deserve that type of treatment and deserve to be happy and feel safe in an environment like school or anywhere in general

[robininthelabyrinth]

prompt: after their father died, the Nie bros were raised by Wen Ruohan, and are forced to survive in the backstabbing tangle of Nightless City politics.

Congratulations! You have also won the “I didn’t mean to write this much” fic prompt lottery, to the tune (again) of about 30k. I hope you enjoy!

Note: any fic warnings will be only on Ao3

-

Fire and Light (ao3) - part 1

“It’ll be all right,” Nie Mingjue murmured to Nie Huaisang, who was curled in his arms, shaking and terrified. The carriage rumbled and lurched around them, traveling down the long path to the Nightless City, where they would now be staying. “It’ll be all right. We’ll manage, somehow.”

He didn’t believe a word he said, of course. How could everything be all right?

Their father was dead. Murdered – it was rather unquestionable at this point. Wen Ruohan had broken his saber from a distance, driving him mad, and Nie Mingjue had known it was Wen Ruohan, but no one had believed him. No one had wanted to help, to intervene, to take action. Even at home, they’d just started resigning themselves to having to take care of Lao Nie as he died by inches when the murderer himself had shown up at the Unclean Realm to ‘help’ them in their moment of need.

Even half-mad, their father had tried to fight back.

Wen Ruohan had put him down like a rabid dog, wringing his neck and tossing him aside.

He’d then announced that Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang, now orphans, would be brought back to the Nightless City and taken into the Wen sect to be his wards, to be appropriately reeducated and brought up well. Brought up properly.

And as for the rest of the Nie sect –

At least they survived, Nie Mingjue reminded himself. Even if they have to work for the Wen sect, even if the sun banner flies in the Unclean Realm…at least they’re not dead.

At least Huaisang is with me.

He didn’t know what to expect when they arrived. He didn’t think it would be anything good.

-

Their rooms in the Nightless City were large, but cold.

They were wards of the great Sect Leader Wen, they were told when they arrived. That meant that they would be treated with respect, as if they were truly young masters of the Wen sect. They would get the best tutors, the best clothing, the best food and drink…they would be masters of the world, if only they bowed their heads and were obedient.

(If they were not obedient, they would be punished. The exact nature of that punishment remained – unspecified.)

“Are they going to hurt us?” Nie Huaisang whispered late at night, curled up in Nie Mingjue’s bed. He’d been hiding in his own, shaking and terrified, until Nie Mingjue had crept out to check on him, daring the unspecified punishment if it meant confirming his brother was all right. Obviously Nie Mingjue couldn’t leave him like that, so he’d brought him back. “Are they going to do to us what they did to a-Die?”

“No,” Nie Mingjue said, with moderate confidence. “They’re not. They’ve put in too much effort, made this all too public, to kill us now. Though I’m not ruling out the possibility that they might freeze us to death by accident. How is it so cold here? It’s south of Qinghe! The climate should be more temperate, not less! And have they never heard of tapestries?”

“Da-ge…”

“Don’t think I don’t feel those ice-blocks you call feet at my waist!”

Nie Huaisang giggled, as Nie Mingjue had intended. “You’re being silly, da-ge.”

Nie Mingjue pretended to huff angrily, tossing his head like a bull, and it made Nie Huaisang giggle again, the way it always had. “Fine, fine,” he grumbled. “I’ll keep you warm, I guess. It’s my duty as your da-ge, isn’t it?”

“What’s my duty?” Nie Huaisang wanted to know.

“To be my spoiled brat of a didi, of course,” Nie Mingjue said, the way he always did, but this time Nie Huaisang shook his head in denial.

“Now that we’re here,” he clarified, looking at Nie Mingjue with wide, trusting eyes. “What do you need me to do?”

Nie Mingjue knew, as Nie Huaisang did not, why their lives had been spared: it all lay in that word, reeducated. They would be indoctrinated into Wen sect beliefs, Wen sect customs, and by the time they were sent back to rule Qinghe as Wen Ruohan’s puppets, they would be more Wen than Nie. Even for him, it would be difficult to resist; for someone as young as Nie Huaisang, with his childish memories already slipping through his fingers like sand, it would be virtually impossible.

Asking him to resist would serve no purpose but to torment him when he inevitably failed.

“Be happy, didi,” he finally said, and pressed his lips to Nie Huaisang’s forehead. “Be happy as you can, as you always have. Don’t let them take away your smile.”

-

The next day, they were introduced to Wen Xu and Wen Chao, the actual young masters of Qishan, sons of Wen Ruohan. Wen Xu was a handful of years older than Nie Mingjue, eighteen to his nearly-fifteen, while Wen Chao was less than two years older than Nie Huaisang. Neither of them seemed happy to see them, scowls fixed firmly on their faces, sneers of disdain twisting their lips.

“Do you train the saber?” Wen Xu asked Nie Mingjue, who raised an eyebrow of ‘what do you think I train’ in return. “A boorish weapon, but then I suppose your ancestors were butchers.”

“I look forward to taking classes with you,” Nie Mingjue said, thinking to himself that one didn’t have to be especially clever to know the history the Nie sect proudly proclaimed at every turn. “They’re clearly very enriching.”

Wen Xu blinked at him and then turned his face away, his lips pressed together – whether in annoyance or, possibly, a sense of humor very deeply buried, it was difficult to tell.

“Father has expectations of you,” he finally said instead of responding to Nie Mingjue’s jibe, and there was no humor in his face now. “You’ll meet them, of course.”

Unspoken was that they couldn’t afford not to. Either of them.

Nie Mingjue lowered his head. His entire sect – all his cousins, aunts, uncles, whether surnamed Nie or not – were back in Qinghe, closely watched by Wen sect commanders. There was a sword to their throat, and therefore also to his.

He, too, could not afford to disappoint Wen Ruohan.

Wen Xu’s shoulders relaxed a little when he saw Nie Mingjue’s submission – he had clearly been charged with their care, and had just as clearly worried about his ability to fulfill his mission should they choose to rebel – and he nodded, more to himself than to them. “There’s classrooms, and training grounds,” he said. “I’ll show you where they are, as well as the dining room – there are set times for meals, and attendance is mandatory – and of course the necessaries. You don’t need more than that, at least to start.”

“Are there rules we should keep in mind?” Nie Mingjue asked, thinking about his brief visit to Gusu.

“Many,” Wen Xu said. His expression was stormy. “Some of them are even spoken aloud.”

-

“Da-ge! Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang ran up to him, lip quivering and eyes glistening wet with tears. It was a very sad, even heart-rending sight; it used to send Nie Mingjue into a frenzy to see him like that. But by now he’d learned better and he didn’t even blink, even though Wen Xu faltered, his sword twisting off in the middle of their spar as if he expected Nie Mingjue to lose focus at a key moment and injure himself. He wouldn’t, of course, and he instead used the moment to tap Wen Xu’s sword pointedly with Baxia, claiming the point. “Da-ge, I fell down again!”

“Excuse me,” Nie Mingjue said to Wen Xu, and turned to kneel before Nie Huaisang. “Did you, now?”

“Uh-huh!”

“And did you hurt yourself?”

“I did!” Nie Huaisang stuck his hand out. There was, maybe, a bruise on his wrist. If one squinted. It was probably just mud, actually. “It hurts awful, da-ge. Kiss it better?”

“That doesn’t really work,” Wen Chao scoffed, only a few steps behind Nie Huaisang.

“Shut up, it does,” Nie Huaisang shot back, temporarily forgetting that he was supposed to be pitiful, and turned back to Nie Mingjue. “Well, da-ge?”

Nie Mingjue nodded solemnly. “It’s my job,” he agreed, gathering Nie Huaisang up into his arms and pressing his lips to the ‘wound’, using the motion to infuse a little bit of spiritual energy as well. Not enough to actually make a difference, and certainly not enough to justify Nie Huaisang promptly declaring himself all better, but he liked to do it anyway – a little connection between them.

Wen Chao looked at them both in suspicion, his brow wrinkling. “That doesn’t really work,” he said again, but his voice was weaker this time, more questioning.

“It does too work,” Nie Huaisang announced. “Maybe if you’re really nice, I’ll let da-ge fix you up too next time you fall down.”

“I’m not going to fall down! I’m not a baby like you!”

“Everyone falls down sometimes. There’s nothing shameful about it,” Nie Mingjue said, and pointed to a bruise on his own face. “I myself fell down just a little while ago. Your brother helped. Several times.”

Wen Chao gaped at him, even as Nie Huaisang giggled.

“And Huaisang? You’re already very good at being a big baby and we all know it. You can stop practicing your skills at any time.”

Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes at him, still laughing.

Nie Mingjue ruffled his hair and sent them both away, Nie Huaisang in the lead and Wen Chao following after, the latter shooting strange looks back at Nie Mingjue over his shoulder.

“You’re too soft on him,” Wen Xu said from behind him, even as Nie Mingjue rose to his feet. “He won’t thank you for it, later.”

Nie Mingjue shrugged. “Later is later,” he said philosophically. “Now is now. Can you show me that move you did earlier, kicking out my feet? It was very well done.”

Wen Xu stared at him. “The one – where I knocked you to the ground?”

“That’s the one. Do it again, just slower; it’ll be hard for me to pick it up, otherwise.”

“You’re just asking – no, never mind. Don’t you care that I beat you with it?”

“…no?” Nie Mingjue hazarded. Was this some sort of weird Qishan Wen hang-up? “How am I supposed to learn if I don’t lose?”

“In training, like everyone else.”

“That’d only teach me how to win when everything goes right,” Nie Mingjue pointed out. “I want to learn how to win even when I’m losing. Here, you show me that and I’ll show you the trick I did this morning, with the disarming.”

Wen Xu tensed up. “I don’t need your tricks.”

I don’t need your pity, he meant, and Nie Mingjue didn’t understand him at all. Wen Xu was at home, his little brother safe, his sect secure – why would Nie Mingjue pity him?

“Consider it a favor to me, then,” Nie Mingjue said, thinking back to how his uncle used to handle the especially prickly tempers in their sect, which was never short on them. “My grasp on the move isn’t that good – teaching it to someone else is the best way for me to improve my own understanding.”

Wen Xu hesitated for a while, thinking it over as if he thought there was some sort trap in the offer – what trap it might be, Nie Mingjue wasn’t sure – but then he nodded.

“All right then,” he said arrogantly. “I won’t even count it as a favor. Consider it a gift, since you’re so new here.”

-

They were there for about a month by the time they met some other people their age.

It was enough time to start to get used to the monotony of it all. They woke up in the morning and were free until breakfast – Nie Mingjue often got in some extra saber training, Nie Huaisang usually slept in – at which point they would meet in the cold, miserable dining hall with enough space to fit two dozen people but which only ever had the four of them, being served by voiceless servants.

They would remain there for enough time to burn a stick of incense at minimum, half a shichen at the maximum, and then they would proceed to their classes. There would be alternating classes and training, all based on some mystifying schedule that seemed to change every day but which clearly had some sort of order based on the boredom with which the Wen heirs regarded it, but always lunch and dinner in the same cold dining room, all alone, same as ever.

It was therefore a surprise when they came down for breakfast and found two other children there: a pale-faced girl about Wen Chao’s age or a little older and a skinny, shy-looking boy closer to Nie Huaisang’s. They were wearing Wen colors, but that didn’t mean anything – so were the rest of them. Neither Nie Mingjue nor Nie Huaisang had been allowed to bring any of their Nie robes to the Nightless City other than the ones they’d been wearing, and those had been splattered with blood. Nie Mingjue had carefully preserved them and still intended on finding a time to go try to see if he could salvage them in the wash, just as soon as he figured out where the laundry was.

His own new robes, in garish Wen colors that made him feel sick every time he looked down, itched and pulled on his body when he moved – they were badly sized. It seemed the seamstresses of the Nightless City hadn’t been expecting someone of his size and shape, although the array of robes he’d found in the closet made him realize, with gut-churning nausea, that he had been expected, that Wen Ruohan had prepared in advance to receive his new wards long before he had committed the act of murder to obtain them.

He hadn’t complained about the discomfort of the badly sized clothing – he hadn’t dared – but Wen Xu had been irritable about it for days now. Based on his rants, it seemed like he suspected that someone had made the robes ill-fitting on purpose to restrict Nie Mingjue’s full range of motion, a scheme designed to make Nie Mingjue humiliate Wen Xu in front of his father when the right size clothing finally did come in.

Nie Mingjue didn’t understand the calculations Wen Xu made, the paranoia involved – who would do something like that? why? what would even be the point? – and he didn’t especially want to, either.

He looked at the other two children. The girl stared down at her food, not making eye contact, but the boy stole glances at him – perhaps he and Nie Huaisang were as much as of a surprise to them as they were to him.

“Good morning,” he said to them. “My brother and I are surnamed Nie. What about you?”

Wen Xu snorted loudly, rolling his eyes. “They’re Wen,” he said scathingly. “Our cousins, from one of collateral branches of the family; the ones in the mountains. Father has taken the two of them on as his wards on account of their unfortunate circumstances and promising talent.”

“Unfortunate circumstances?” Nie Huaisang wondered aloud, and Nie Mingjue sighed to himself at the sheer rudeness of the direct question. “What’s so unfortunate?”

“Our p-parents are dead,” the boy told him quietly, stuttering a little.

“Oh,” Nie Huaisang said. “Ours too.”

There was a moment of silence, the entire room disbelieving, and then Nie Mingjue started laughing.

The sound of his laughter verged on the hysterical, hurting his throat, but he couldn’t seem to stop. Not because it was funny, of course, it wasn’t funny, would never be funny, it was still raw and burning and painful. It probably would be for the rest of his undoubtedly short life. But news travelled fast in the cultivation world, and while he couldn’t say for sure, Nie Mingjue suspected he’d be hard pressed to find someone who hadn’t heard about Wen Ruohan murdering the old Nie sect leader and taking his children by now.

Judging by the horrified expressions on the Wen cousins’ faces, they definitely had, and the sheer awkwardness that paralyzed the entire room just made the entire thing pathetically – well, laughable.

“Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang hissed, cheeks turning red, but he was smiling a little, too, mostly out of the infectiousness of Nie Mingjue’s laughter. “Don’t embarrass me!”

Nie Mingjue leaned over and ruffled his hair. “Extra etiquette lessons for a week.”

“No!”

“Someone has to teach you to think before you speak,” Nie Mingjue said, still chuckling involuntarily with the aftereffects of his bout of inappropriate humor. “Not every thought that passes through your brain has to reach your tongue, you know. Consider holding some back. Cultivate an aura of mystery.”

Nie Huaisang grumbled and went back to picking at his food.

“Aren’t you going to punish him?” the girl asked suddenly. She was staring straight at Nie Mingjue. “You didn’t embarrass him. He embarrassed you.”

“I’m his older brother,” Nie Mingjue said with a shrug. “If he’s not embarrassed by me and I’m not mortified by him, something’s clearly wrong –”

“Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang wailed.

Nie Mingjue put some extra meat into his bowl to apologize for teasing, and Nie Huaisang subsided, making faces at him as he did.

“You’re weird,” Wen Chao announced.

Nie Mingjue didn’t think so, but all the Wens averted their eyes away from him as if they were silently agreeing, so maybe he was.

-

It turned out that the girl’s name was Wen Qing and the boy, her brother, was called Wen Ning.

“Don’t any of you have courtesy names?” Nie Mingjue asked, a little desperately, and it turned out that the Wen sect had the strange tradition of referring to people by their given names until they were properly acknowledged. Acknowledged as what wasn’t specified, but they all seemed to have a sense of definitiveness about it, as if expecting it to happen at some distant date.

Qinghe had the exact opposite tradition – given names were for immediate family only, sometimes a secret kept just to the parents, and everyone else went straight to using the courtesy name almost immediately after the first month ceremony.

“But you haven’t done anything by then,” Wen Ning said, worrying his lip with his teeth. Nie Huaisang had been devastated to discover that despite being small and thin as a stick, Wen Ning was exactly three weeks older than him – he’d been looking forward to calling someone didi for once, and now he was off sulking about finding himself the youngest yet again. Nie Mingjue was sure he’d get over it quickly. “Nothing impressive, nothing worthy of acclaim…what can a baby possibly do to deserve getting a name so early?”

“They were born, they are alive,” Nie Mingjue said. “What more do they need to do? Isn’t that worthy of recognition all on its own?”

He got strange looks again.

It turned out that Wen Qing was the talented one of the pair – she was training to be a doctor, and all her teachers spoke very highly of her.

“That’s wonderful,” Nie Mingjue said, and meant it. “Medical skills are a rare pearl that ought to be treasured; with the world always in need, there can never be too many doctors. I look forward to being treated by you in the future.”

Wen Qing blinked owlishly at him. It appeared that she was unaccustomed to praise.

“If you ever need someone to practice on, let me know,” he tried – he knew pretty words were far from his forte, and actions were better anyway – but that didn’t seem to help.

“I’m not good at anything,” Wen Ning volunteered, wringing his hands. “Jiejie refused to leave me at home by myself, but I’m not - good. At things.”

“Everyone is good at something,” Nie Mingjue assured him, the words coming much easier this time – he knew this particular routine well, given Nie Huaisang’s routinely poor physical performance in a sect that placed such a premium on it. “Some have strengths that are lauded by society, others merely ones that give color to it, but both are valuable and worthy of praise. You will find your talent, given time.”

Wen Ning appeared rather dazed by the concept. “But – what if I look for my talent and it turns out I really am no good at anything?”

“Then you’ll be good at being cared for,” Nie Mingjue said firmly. “Someone has to keep us older siblings in business with something to do.”

“Oh,” Wen Ning said, hugging himself until his face turned red, and then he ran away.

Nie Mingjue watched him go, feeling a little helpless. He hadn’t meant at all to be cruel, or condescending, or whatever it was that had so affected Wen Ning. Why was it, he wondered, that whenever he addressed those surnamed Wen, everything he did seemed to end up having the wrong reaction?

[twdeadfanfic]

Feral Pt. 8

Daryl Dixon x OC

Summary:  Daryl is on a run with Rick when, in a warehouse, they find a woman who attacks them, and who reminds Daryl to a lioness…or a feral cat, and who doesn’t seem to trust anyone, including them, but Daryl finds himself going back to the warehouse, trying to get that feral to go with him to the prison, and to earn her trust.

Chapter 8/10

Last chapter...Daryl and Dana kissed!

You can find my other fics in my masterlist.

Back at the prison, Daryl felt all eyes on him and Dana, as if people knew what had happened between them, that they were now together as a couple, though probably it was all in his head, there was no way for them to know. It wasn’t that he wanted to keep it secret, not at all, but he couldn’t help but feel a bit shy about it, besides he was sure Rick was going to have the time of his life teasing him about it.

Dana, though, didn’t seem to mind at all that people looked at them or what they thought, or if they seemed to notice something different between them, or if it was all in Daryl’s head. On their way to the kitchen area to clean their hunted pieces, they walked near Kate, and when she looked at them, Dana held to Daryl’s arm and rubbed the side of her head against his arm like she had done the day before to “mark him as hers.”

Daryl blushed, couldn’t help it, getting flustered and shy, but he also couldn't help his snort. Was she really jealous? Daryl thought it was ridiculous, but at the same time, the idea sent something weird to his belly. He didn’t think anyone had been jealous over him ever before. She had no reason to feel like that, though, and Daryl hoped she knew. Dana looked at him and smiled, but she didn’t seem upset, if something she seemed amused, and she headbutted his shoulder softly once more.

“Come on, kitten,” Daryl said, couldn’t help his soft, silly smile as he looked at her, ignoring everyone around even if for a second. “Let’s clean this and get it ready to stew it.”

*

That evening, Daryl was torn between having dinner with Dana in any of their cells, like sometimes they did even if now Dana dealt better with people and sometimes dined in the canteen, or going with everyone else. It wasn’t strange for him to dine alone, everyone knew it by now, but sometimes during dinner he got the chance to catch up with the others, especially if it had been a busy day, and today, he and Dana had come back pretty later than usual. Yes, they had kind of gotten distracted here and there, Daryl still couldn’t wrap his mind around the idea of Dana kissing him, wanting to be with him, couldn’t help the weird things in his belly, and every time Dana caught him looking at her like that, in wonder and awe, she’d seem amused and she’d stop to kiss him again, which had proven to be pretty distracting. But still, they had managed to hunt quite a few pieces, and so Daryl didn’t feel too guilty.

Since it was later than usual while they cleaned their pieces, Daryl offered to get dinner ready too, letting the grateful guy on kitchen duty had some more free time, and Dana helped him to get everything ready to make stew in several big pots, so it’d last them for more than that night.

“So…what you wanna do, eat with everyone else or alone?” Daryl asked while they cleaned everything.

“Don’t care.” Dana shrugged. “Maggie and Glenn were planning runs.”

“Alright, we can go have dinner with everyone else, see if they have come up with somethin’?”

“Alright.” Dana shrugged again, and then, while Daryl was distracted putting a pot in its place, she suddenly tugged at him and pecked his lips, taking him by surprise, and Daryl couldn’t help the blush that tinted his cheeks. It seemed to be the reaction that Dana was looking for, as she smiled, seeming amused. They had just been together for a few hours, and she’d already proved that she liked to get him all flustered when he least expected it. It made him feel silly, and yet, Daryl couldn’t help his small, bashful smile. Chewing on his lip, he pushed past his shyness to wrap his arm around Dana, holding her to his side.

“Come on, kitten, let’s feed these people.”

While they had dinner sat down with the others, Daryl tried to pay attention to what Maggie and Glenn were saying, really tried, but sometimes it seemed as if his eyes wanted to wander to Dana, who was sat down near him, his mind still in awe at the idea of them being now together, that she wanted him like that, and even though it still made him nervous and maybe even a bit, just a bit, scared, whenever his eyes wandered to her, Dana would look at him too, a tiny smile tugging at the corner of her lip, and Daryl couldn’t stop his own, looking away quickly every time before he got too flustered.

He was afraid the others noticed that something was going on, though, he could already see Rick smirking and arching his eyebrows at him, and Daryl rolled his eyes, looking away from Rick and towards Glenn and Maggie, but they too seemed kind of amused, though Daryl hoped that it was his mind playing tricks on him. He’d teased and made fun of Glenn and Maggie sometimes getting caught up on each other, oblivious to everything else, and now it seemed as if he was doing the same, but he couldn’t help it, even if it was embarrassing.

“You think they know ‘bout us?” Daryl asked to Dana when they were in the corridor at the outside of their cells, and she smirked and nodded. “Oh…” He couldn’t help his shyness.

Dana frowned. “Don’t want them to?”

“No…just…I don’t care, just…” Daryl honestly didn’t care what the other thoughts, and still, his shyness was there. “Just…”

“Shy,” Dana smirked and Daryl was glad that she didn’t think he might be embarrassed about being with her or something stupid like that.

“Yeah…I guess…” Daryl admitted, looking down and fidgeting. “Ain’t lookin’ forward to them joking’and teasin’…” He guessed he’d have it coming for having messed like that with Maggie and Glenn…and yet… “Rick’s bein’ a prick and teasin’ me about you since you came here already.”

“Yeah?” Dana’s smirk went bigger. “About?”

“Nothing, he was just bein’ stupid on purpose…” Daryl shrugged, though now that he thought about it, maybe Rick hadn’t been so stupid after all. Dana didn’t say anything, but suddenly she was tugging at him to peck his lips, once more taking him by surprise.

“It’s fun,” she said. “Teasing you.”

Daryl scoffed, flustered, hating that once again he was blushing. “Pff…maybe you’re spendin’ too much time with Rick lately…”

Dana grinned. “It’s fun. ‘Cause you’re shy.”

“Yeah, whatever…” Daryl rolled his eyes, scoffing, but his burning cheeks betrayed him. “Let’s get some sleep.”

“Can I sleep here?” Dana nodded towards his cell.

“You uh…you wanna?”

Dana shrugged. “Only if you do.”

“Yeah…” Daryl nodded, swallowing hard.

He didn’t know what to do, and so he went directly to the unmade bed, sitting down on it as Dana walked behind him, and kicking off his boots before lying down on the bed without even thinking about changing clothes, his mind too busy at the idea of Dana joining him to sleep…The cot was small, and Daryl hoped she wouldn’t be uncomfortable, or that he’d push her or kick her while they slept, or something, and she’d decide to leave and go back to her cell… Maybe he should drag another mattress there like Maggie and Glenn had done…or maybe he had gotten ahead of himself…or maybe…

Daryl lost his train of thoughts when he realized that after taking off her boots, Dana was pulling off her trousers too, and Daryl didn’t know if she did it to sleep more comfortable or if she was just trying to mess with him and get him all flustered again, or both, but he tried his best not to look away, not to get flustered, failing only a tiny bit.

Dana looked at him and Daryl lied down on the bed, moving towards the wall to leave room for her on the bed. Dana lied down, propping herself on an elbow to look at him, smiling softly, and Daryl swallowed hard, feeling those butterflies in his belly again. She reached out her other hand to softly caress his face and hair, and Daryl’s eyes closed as a content sigh escaped his lips.

“Shy. But cute,” Dana whispered, and then she leaned to kiss his lips, and Daryl didn’t try to fight her words, too busy kissing her. Dana pulled back, smiling at him, before she lied down, resting her head on his chest and throwing an arm over him, and even one of her legs, snuggling to him as much as possible, and Daryl couldn’t help but love the feeling.

Daryl wrapped his arm around her, holding her to him, and when he began to stroke her arm softly, he swore he could almost hear her purr like an actual cat. “Night, kitten,” he whispered, kissing the top of her head, and Dana snuggled even more to him, holding to his shirt as if she didn’t want to let go of him, and…Daryl would be lying if he didn’t say that he loved it. It still might feel unreal and a bit scary, this having a relationship thing, but…it felt too good, being snuggled on bed with Dana, good enough for him to want to not overthink it and just enjoy it for once.

When Daryl woke up, Dana was still snuggled to him, lying over his chest, face almost buried on the crook of his shoulder, and Daryl couldn’t help how content he felt or the smile that spread across his face. He tightened his arm around her and nuzzled her hair, wondering if he’d ever felt like this before, so warm, and content and just…so good.

Maybe having a relationship didn’t have to be scary after all, maybe things would be the same between them, but now he could hold her to him, kiss her, and all the things that made him feel those bubbly butterflies in his belly, making him feel a bit silly, but at the same time, too good to care about it being silly or not.

He felt Dana pressing her lips against his neck and then she was looking up from his shoulder to give him a lazy smile. “Morning, kitten,” Daryl said quietly, reaching out to brush her knuckles across her cheek gently, a bit in awe about being waking up with her, about how it made him feel, but the gesture of affection seemed to come naturally to him somehow.

Dana nuzzled his neck again and she shifted to straddle his hips, looking down at him. She smiled again, reaching down to caress his face softly and then run her fingers through his hair, before she leaned to kiss his lips, and Daryl could swear that he felt himself melt. When their lips parted, Daryl had his eyes still closed, and he felt Dana placing kisses along his neck. He took a sharp breath when Dana sucked on his skin, and she pulled away to look at him.

“Okay?” She asked and Daryl nodded. Dana smiled and kissed his lips softly before going for his neck again. “Mine…” She murmured before she sucked on his neck again, and Daryl wondered if she was actually trying to mark him. He snorted but couldn’t help but get a bit flustered too, and he reached to cup her face, gently making Dana look at him.

“Hey…you ain’t really jealous are you,” he asked softly and Dana didn’t say anything. “You don’t gotta be…there’s…” Daryl chewed on his lip, trying to push past his shyness. Dana was sat down on his lap, without trousers, how in the world he was still shy, but talking about feelings had never been his forte. “There’s no one else I’d like to…to be like I’m with you, to have what we have.”

Dana smiled at that, caressing his face again before kissing his lips. “I’m yours,” she whispered, and Daryl couldn’t stop the butterflies in his belly even if he was flustered too. “Don’t want to be with anyone else.” Daryl’s heart was beating hard against his chest and he didn’t know what to say, and so he decided to just pull Dana even closer and kiss her lips again.

Eventually, Dana sat up, looking down at him, running her hands down his chest and Daryl chewed on his lip as she looked at her above him, swallowing hard when one of Dana’s hands found its way under his shirt, Dana smiled softly at him when she noticed it.

“Shy…” She whispered, pecking his lips before Daryl could try to negate it, no matter he was blushing. “Cute,” she whispered before pecking the tip of his nose, and somehow the gesture made Daryl feel like he was melting again.  Dana sat up again and smiled at him softly before nodding towards the closed door of the cell. “Hunting?”

Despite the dark sheet that covered the door of his cell, Daryl could see light outside, filtering into the cell, and he knew it was later than usual. He could hear people’s voices around too, the prison waking up. “Yeah…” He nodded, he couldn’t spend all day lying in bed with Dana…Daryl didn’t think he had ever wanted to spend the day in bed, he’d drive himself crazy with the inactivity, but maybe that was before he had Dana in bed with him, snuggled to him and kissing him, and…and he really needed to start moving.

Daryl sat up, Dana still on his lap, and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing him again before he could do anything, and he let out a sound of surprise against her lips before he found himself melting into her again. Dana pulled back as suddenly as she had kissed him, and she got up from his lap, stepping out of the bed. She bent down and picked up her discarded trousers, walking to the door and lifting the curtain without bothering to put the trousers on.

“You’re gonna just go out with no trousers on?” Daryl snorted, but it didn’t surprise him.

Dana shrugged. “My cells next to yours.” She left his cell but reappeared a few minutes later, fully dressed, looking at him from the door while Daryl finished getting ready too, tying his boots.

“Let’s grab some breakfast and get going,” he told her and Dana nodded. As he stepped out of his cell, Daryl glanced towards hers and then at her, chewing on his lip. “You uh…if you wanna…if you wanna you can move your stuff to my cell?” Daryl couldn’t help his nerves as he looked at her, wondering if he was getting ahead of himself, if he shouldn’t have asked, he was a bit clueless in this having a relationship thing, but to his relief, Dana grinned and nodded, before suddenly pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

Daryl couldn’t help the blushing of his cheeks, and that his first instinct was to look around, see if someone had caught them kissing, and yet when Dana smiled softly at him and reached down to take his hand, lacing her fingers with his and tugging at him to walk with her, he found that he couldn’t really care about someone seeing them holding hands. They were together, and if it made him feel that good, then there was no point feeling embarrassed or anxious about it, when he could just let himself enjoy it for once.

*

Daryl woke up once again with Dana in his arms, and even after weeks together, it still made him smile and snuggle to her, content and warm. He found himself lazing in bed too often now, when before he usually jumped out of it to get things done, go out to the woods…but he couldn’t help himself with Dana there, lying next to him, curled up to him.

Dana was lying on her side and she seemed still asleep, her warm back pressed against his chest as Daryl curled up around her, tightening the arm that he had wrapped around her. Daryl kissed her shoulder and then nuzzled her hair, letting out a content sigh. He felt Dana waking up and then she turned around in his arms to give him a lazy smile before pecking his lips, and she burrowed her face on his chest, snuggling to him and wrapping her arms around him too.

“We have to go hunting,” Daryl murmured though he didn’t move a bit, and Dana hummed and nodded without moving either. “You make me lazy…” Daryl complained, chuckling.

Dana pulled back to look at him, arching an eyebrow, seeming amused. “Me?”

“Yeah, you…” Daryl nuzzled her neck, smiling when she laughed as he tickled her. “Being like this.”

“Like what?” Dana reached out to stroke his hair, brushing it away from his face but Daryl just shrugged, he didn’t know how to explain to her everything that she made him feel, and he felt too shy to try to say it aloud. He hoped she understood it without words, though. Dana smiled softly, kissing his lips before pulling back. “Come on. Hunt.”

*

Waking up with Dana in his arms, lying over his chest, was not strange or surprising for Daryl anymore, but it felt as good as the first day, and it made him as lazy as the first day, wanting to just snuggle on the bed with her, warm and content, for a little bit. It was early enough that he didn’t have to hurry out of the bed, early enough for him to allow himself to be lazy even if just for a moment…They had to go on a run, but the prison was still dark and silent. Daryl nuzzled Dana’s hair softly, wrapping his arm more tightly around her when he felt her waking up, snuggling to him even more.

Daryl was caressing her hair carefully and then he let his fingers brush over her shoulder and neck, moving over the scar that marked her skin down her neck and to her back without realizing it, until he felt Dana freezing in his arms. “Sorry…” He apologized in a whisper.

“They marked me like cattle,” she said bitterly.

Daryl kept stroking her shoulder as he chewed on his lip, unsure about asking her or not… “Who did this?”

“Assholes.”

“Yeah, I…I had figured that much…” Daryl didn’t press it, though, just kept stroking her skin softly, curled up with her, and he was about to tell her that they should stop being lazy and get to work, they had to go to a run, when Dana spoke.

“I was alone, had been for days, a group of men found me…thought they were going to help me, they said they would…they didn’t. Took me to their settlement, old campsite, big…there were two women there, they didn’t look at me, didn’t talk to me, seemed scared, I didn’t like it, I tried to walk away, they didn’t let me…then I saw cages, there were people in them…” Dana explained quietly, and Daryl had to wonder again how there were so many fucked up people in the world, now all teaming up, it seemed.

“They wanted me to clean the place with the other two women and have sex with them. I bit off the lip of the one who tried to kiss me…”

Daryl could almost see it, but he wished he could actually see it, see his feral kitten biting off the lip of an asshole who tried to force himself on her…he was boiling in anger but tried to keep it down, and he kissed the top of Dana’s hair.

“They were angry…held me and beat me…I thought they’d kill me but they didn’t, threw me in one of the cages. There were some men and women in them, some were hurt. Nobody spoke to me or looked at me. I didn’t know what was going on…” Dana kept going, and Daryl thought it was the longest he’d heard her speak, and so he stayed quiet, letting her do it, wanting to know and also wanting her to get it out of her system.

“I found out at night. Each night, those assholes got bored and drunk, picked up two people from the cages, gave them knives, made them fight until one of them was dead. Someone told me that the ones who tried to resist it and didn’t fight, were shot and killed…so they killed you and your rival if you didn’t fight. They branded us with irons, made patterns and marks so they knew who we belonged to, would take bets to see whose fighter would win.” Daryl had seen a lot of shit both before walkers and after, but that was more than sick.

“Whenever they picked me, I’d fight…I killed people. I…I didn’t want to…I didn’t…but…a man pointed the gun to my head, told me to finish the job or he’d kill me and then the other person…so I…I…I did it…every night they picked me…I’d kill the other person before they, or the men, killed me…but I didn’t want to…I didn’t…”

Dana looked up from his chest, tears falling down her eyes as she swallowed hard, and Daryl didn’t think he’d ever seen her looking like that. He hated it, it hurt, it was a dart to the heart, and he hated that she’d gone through something like that. He couldn’t imagine it. “I know, kitten, I know…” He whispered, trying to comfort her, to reassure her, wishing that he knew how to make it better, hating that he didn’t know what to do or say. He kissed her lips, tasting her tears, before Dana snuggled to him again, tight, and Daryl wrapped his arms around her, holding her to his chest tightly, feeling her shaking.

“So I…I kept killing…until I was picked every night…until…until there was nobody else in the cages but me…” Dana swallowed hard. “I thought that they’d kill me now, I had murdered all those people just to be killed anyway. But they said they were going out to find more people…or walkers for me to fight, if they didn’t find anything else. Left a couple of men watching the place. Idiots. Called for one of them, took off my clothes, told him I was bored and to get in the cell with me. Idiot. He thought I was going to unzip his pants, I took the knife from his belt, slit his throat. Went for the other man, gutted him before he could shot me. The two women were scared, told them I’d help them but they…they seemed scared of me…wouldn’t let me close…they took some stuff and ran away…”

On one side, Daryl thought that those women were idiots, but on the other, he could understand them a bit, he’d seen how Dana could be when she got feral, and the women had seen her fighting and killing people every night, even if she was forced to do so, and Daryl could see her, maybe naked and bloodied after killing the two men. Still, probably those women would have been better off with her, safer and protected.

“I didn’t run. Went to the armory, took a riffle. Climbed on top of their lookout, waited for the other men to come back, shoot at them all. All the bullets. They didn’t see it coming. Then I left…was on my own until Rick and you found me.” Dana didn’t say anything else, and Daryl didn’t know what to say either, he was afraid of saying the wrong thing, but it felt wrong to just stay silent after Dana had told him everything.

“I…uh…I’m sorry…” Daryl muttered, it was lame but he didn’t know what else to say, and he felt Dana nodding. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.” If only he could take her pain and trauma from her…”I uh…”

Daryl hated that he didn’t know what to say, that he wasn’t good with words. Dana didn’t seem to mind, she sat up, stroking his cheek and leaning to kiss it before she pulled back again. “We got a run. Come on.”

“Wait…” Daryl sat up and wrapped his arms around Dana before she could pull back, and he kissed her forehead, feeling pleased when it made her smile. “Nothing like that it’s ever gonna happen to you again, alright? I ain’t gonna let that happen,” Daryl assured her and Dana nodded in silence. “Not that you need me, I’ve seen you fighting, you’re a lioness…” Daryl murmured shyly, but he meant it, when he saw Dana’s smirk,he didn’t care about shyness anymore. Still, even if she was badass and a fighter, a survivor, so strong and skilled, Daryl would do anything in his hand to keep her safe, to take care of her, to protect her life with his if needed. He had the feeling that Dana thought the same about him, though. “But…I ain’t letting anyone hurt you ever again.”

Dana gave him that small half-smile. “I know,” she whispered before leaning to kiss his lips, and when she pulled back, Daryl leaned to hold his forehead against hers.

“Thank you for telling me all that,” he told her quietly. “I know it ain’t easy…I appreciate it. Thank you.”

Dana nodded, her forehead nudging his. “I trust you,” she whispered, and somehow, her words alone made Daryl feel like he could melt as something twirled in his belly.

“And I trust you too,” he murmured.

Dana pulled back and smiled at him. “I’m not letting anyone hurt you either,” she said quietly before kissing his lips again. “Come on. We got a run.”

The run was as good as it could go. As always, they didn’t find as many stuff as they’d have wanted, but that was usual, everything was scarcer and scarcer each new run, and Daryl knew they were lucky they had the prison with orchards, farming and hunting their own food, building their own stuff, for when every place ran dry and there wouldn’t be a chance to find stuff on runs as often anymore. But nobody had been hurt, and that was the important thing.

There had been walkers around, and so Daryl had seen once more how Dana could go from the kitten that shared his bed and snuggled to him, to the feral cat that fought walkers ferociously, viciously sinking her knife into their heads. She was skillful but sometimes it worried Daryl how she just threw herself at walkers, no matter that she always came on top, dead bodies piling up around her. Whenever he told her, though, Dana just rolled her eyes and pecked his lips to shut him up and, Daryl was pretty sure, to get him flustered too.

It always came to his mind how Rick, Carol, and the others always told him to be careful when on runs he didn’t think it twice about throwing himself at walkers, putting them down before they could hurt any of his family, trusting his skill…now he was experiencing first hand how it was to worry about someone doing the same, though if he was honest, he still did it. But now, they had each other, Dana and him, fighting together, having each other’s back, protecting their family, making sure no walker or any threat could get to them, and even if he’d be embarrassed to say it aloud. Daryl sometimes, sometimes, allowed himself to think that maybe together, they could be unstoppable.

*

We got fluff, and Dana’s backstory, and more fluff. I hope you liked the chapter. If you did, please let me know your thoughts in a comment, and as always, reblogs are more tha welcome. We got back to action next chapter! (But, no, won’t follow the prison show plotline).

As always, excuse my English.

I’ll reblog this with the taglist in a second.

[axther]

hero of many, princess of none

in which Bakugou and Kirishima, trying to attempt a quest, meet a strange young woman.  for @reddriot​ 

Life in the borderlands was not easy. 

It was long and toiling, with the twin suns making the days hot and the years long. The sea of sand that stretched across half of the planet could turn into tundra in a day. There used to be kingdoms built on top of kingdoms on top of kingdoms, but they were all sent to dust and to pain. 

And alone survived a girl. 

She was a child. She alone survived the ruin of a thousand empires, waiting above the sand and snow. She alone was the last heir of a kingdom that never was. Even when the wind ripped off the skin of lesser men, she did not die. 

The little princess walked in a state between heartbreak and duty. Why did it happen this way? Why her? Every question was raised. Every god heard a plea. But none answered. 

So, the little princess wandered the borderlands, lonely and divine. And through the years, she grew, with skin like armour and eyes like a stone. She could look out at the great dunes like a hawk and see a single creature. She was armed to the bone, no inch of her left open. She was weary, but stood for those that had no king or knight to protect them. Those that abused what they had were forced to face her dark fury. She became the Mirrored Darkryder, for the fleeting steps in the night that forced the hand of her enemies and the mirages that she seemed to leave in her wake. 

She was the hero of many, and princess of none. 

Good inns were rare. 

Bakugou Katsuki sat at the bar of an inn, with his best friend and dragon shifter Kirishima. They were off on some quest that his mother made him do, after a day of barking at each other, and was told not to come home until it was done. It was something about a bear, blah blah blah, Bakugou really didn’t care. He just wanted to get it over with so he could go back to fighting the enemies of his people and essentially becoming a war hero. But here he was. In an inn, trying to figure out where said bear was. 

Kirishima was chatting happily with the bartender and no less than three patrons, waving his hands about and laughing freely. Bakugou felt sour. He wanted to kick everyone in the room and make them shut up. But alas, he needed information, and inns were the only place to get it.

“Hey, dumbass.” Bakugou hissed, nudging Kirishima’s shin with his foot. “Ask them about the bear.” “Oh!” Kirishima looked at Bakugou with a huge grin. “I already did! They said there is no bear like that.” “What?!” Bakugou barked, rising from his seat, fury welling up in him. “What the hell do you mean?!” 

“Apparently there’s no bears around here.” Kirishima shrugged. “Only wolves.” 

“That doesn’t make any fuckin’ sense!” Bakugou looked at the bartender, gritting his teeth and almost frothing at the mouth. “We’re looking for the White Bear!” “White Bear?” The bartender winced, and Bakugou realised the whole bar started going quiet. The conversations went null, all eyes on them. 

“White Bear…” One of the young ladies said in a hushed whisper. “He’s our lord.” “A thief,” An older man hissed, gripping the table under his worn hands. “He steals our crops, our women, our animals. Our way of life.” “You won’t have to worry about him.” The bartender leaned back, beginning to wipe down a glass. “He’s being taken care of.” “What?” Kirishima leaned in, curious. “What do you mean?” “The Mirror Darkryder,” The girl whispered with reverence. Heads bowed down, and the candles in the room seemed to flicker. “She acts for the people. We asked…” “She will save us.” A youth, maybe Bakugou’s age, rose with a justice-ridden look. Kirishima seemed wholly into the mysterious saviour thing the village had going on, but Bakugou scoffed.

 “What, you hired an assassin?” “She’s no assassin.” The bartender hummed. “Some say she was born out of the sands of the Borderlands. Others think she’s some sort of...god. I dunno. But she’s the protector of the people. If someone sends a messenger into the Tenebris Woodland with a plea for help, the plea will be answered.” 

“We hope that the White Bear will be better, in some way.” The girl sighed, having the last word. “In death, or in life.” 

Bakugou felt his blood chill, and he turned to Kirishima. He seemed almost awestruck, with a gaping mouth and wide eyes. There was a moment of pure reverence before a traveller walked through the door, breaking the tension. It was raining like hell outside, and when the figure walked in, they were soaked through. A certain air made them feel almost dangerous, like a plague in human form. They seemed weary, sighing before plopping into a chair next to Bakugou. The inn went back to its loud state and the lights went bright again as if nothing had happened at all. Kirishima looked around in a bit of confusion, raising his eyebrow. 

“Huh? That was weird.” “How can I help you, stranger?” The bartender talked over Kirishima, leaning over to the traveller. They lowered their hood with a tired sigh, shaking their head to reveal a young woman. She was beautiful, even in her exhaustion, and the bartender swallowed a bit. “Miss?” “Right, uh...whatever is filling.” “Of course.” The bartender left to go get something, leaving her with Bakugou and Kirishima. He leaned over Bakugou to give the traveller a toothy grin. 

“Hi there! Are you visiting?” “Hm?” She looked at him with a surprised glance. “Oh, yes. I’m just passing through.” 

“That’s awesome! So are we!” Kirishima skedaddled around Bakugou to squeeze between the two of them. “What’s your name?” “I’m YN.” She smiled softly, tilting her head. “And you?” “This is my bro, Bakugou!” Before Bakugou could protest, he was tucked under Kirishima’s overenthusiastic arm and noogied.

 “Shut the fuck up! Don’t you fuckin-!” 

“He’s my best friend!” Kirishima grinned, letting go of Bakugou. “And I’m Kirishima. Dragon shifter extraordinaire!” 

“Don’t just tell anyone that-!” “Neat!” YN grinned, lacing her hands. “I’ve only met a handful of dragon shifters before.” “Wait! You’ve met any at all?!” “Why, yes!” She nodded fervently, giddy.  She seemed like a total sweetheart, as opposed to the initial aura of “don’t interact or else I’ll kill you”. Her eyes seemed to sparkle in the candlelight, and when she leaned into her hand, her cheek was squished. There was a kind glow about her, and Bakugou felt his unease slowly melt away. 

“When?” His words were less suspicious, and more inquisitive. “Was it with the nomads?” “Oh, no.” YN shook her head happily. “It was in the mountains, a small family of them. The children were such small things! Their scales hadn’t even shed yet.” 

“Oh!” Kirishima had a hand over his heart, seeming almost faint at the idea. “That’s so cute! Bro, bro, remember when we were kids?!” 

“Fuck off,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, peeling away from Kirishima’s side in embarrassment. “I don’t fuckin remember.” “C’mon, you still have my scales on your armour!” “Shut up!” YN started laughing, and the sound was whole. It was peace, welcome changes, the twin suns through the green trees. Both Bakugou and Kirishima paused, leaning in and going quiet to listen. It wasn’t like bells in the noise, but in the motion; pealing, tumbling, ringing everywhere. When she laughed, the whole world stopped to listen. And the two stared. 

“So.” Bakugou broke the silence as soon as she stopped, not wanting for the conversation to go dead yet. “What are you in town for?” YN tilted her head again, and pursed her lips. She seemed to be in thought for a second, before nodding. “I’ve been taking odd jobs through the Borderlands and the Meseta. The sort of stuff people wouldn’t do...normally.” “Like…?” Kirishima paused, trying to make sense of it. “Like...yanno…” “Oh! No! Not like that!” YN waved her hands, flushed before taking a sip of her drink. “Not like that.” 

“Then what is it?” Bakugou frowned. Before he got his answer, there was a yell from outside, and everyone looked towards the door. YN seemed to have a dark sparkle in her eye.“Neither of you are grossed out by blood, right?” “Huh? No. Why?”YN rose from her seat as people began pouring outside, and Bakugou watched her go with a confused scowl. “What the fuck was that about?” Bakugou got up to leave and Kirishima followed, a cautious and curious glance in his eyes. They both stepped out of the inn, and saw everyone crowding the town square. There were double the people in the bar, and when Kirishima saw what everyone was looking at, he recoiled and grabbed Bakugou’s arm. In the middle of the town square was an elaborate sacrificial stand, with several spears placed in a circle. The two longest were in the centre, on a pyre that burned bright into the night. One had a long, dark cloak on it, which miraculously hadn’t caught fire yet and waved in the thick night wind. The other was the head of a grisly young man, with his eyes wide with fear and tongue lolling out. He still had colour in his face, but the blood was trailing down the spear and onto the pyre. It was a morbid sight, but villagers were dancing around it in joy. 

“He’s dead! The White Bear is dead!” 

“She did it!” 

Though the sight was one to behold, Bakugou and Kirishima both slowly relaxed once they realised that their work was done for them. Bakugou glanced over to see YN looking at the pyre with a satisfied look.

“Well, they’re happy.” She crossed her arms, looking at them out of the corner of her eye. Bakugou noticed that when her black cloak moved, it showed a whole set of weapons around her waist and thighs. One had blood on the handle; an embellished dagger with a white bear motif. 

“It was you,” Kirishima whispered, clearly reaching the same conclusion as Bakugou.

 “Maybe it was.” YN shrugged. 

“You took his own weapon?” Bakugou couldn’t help but be impressed. 

“I never said that.” Despite her refusing to answer, it seemed more out of obligation to keep her ‘identity’ a secret, as opposed to actually lying to them.  “Wow.” Kirishima looked at YN with wide eyes. “So you...what, you go around saving people?” “Me?” YN turned back to the pyre, a smile on her face as she watched it burn. “I would never. That’s made for people who have far too much free time on their hands.” Bakugou scoffed. “Like the Mirrored what’s-her-nuts.” “Exactly.” YN sounded both ready to burst in laughter, and posh at the same time. “Like the Mirrored what’s-her-nuts.” 

“Where will you go?” Kirishima’s voice was laced with concern.

 “Oh, I don’t know. Wherever the sand and the dirt takes me, I suppose. Wherever the Mirrored Darkryder is needed most.” YN turned with a flourish, her cape flicking behind her as she slowly walked into the woods, fading into the dark with what felt like too sudden of an exit. Bakugou looked at Kirishima.

 “Do you think we’ll ever see her again?” Kirishima sighed, eyes wide and looking at where she seemed to become shadow. 

“No.” Bakugou shook his head, feeling as though the moment was something monumental. 

“I don’t think we will.” 

[astringofmadhousefloozies]

On Illness and Recovery, or: Sickfic, Baby!

You know the drill! Please let me know if you liked it, and check my Twisted Wonderland fanfiction tag if you want other shit I’ve done.

Contains coarse language and emotional whiplash.

~*~*~*~

Some things stay true no matter where you are; the truest, right now? Schools are disgusting fucking petri dishes, as your miserable cold will tell you. Your cough had only been getting worse as the days went on, with it came exhaustion and a chill that wouldn't leave your bones. You should probably be holed up in your dorm instead of going to class, but that had it's own issues that you were struggling to solve.

"Are you done yet? I want to eat." Grimm's nose, and little else, poked out from a pile of blankets on your bed.

"Nowhere close. Shh." You taped the last bit of plastic over the balcony entryway, and swapped the roll of tape for a heavy duty stapler. "Hold that right there."

The skull-faced ghost held a packing blanket over the plastic as you stapled it in place. By the time you were done, you couldn't see much, which at least meant you could no longer see your own breath. Maybe now, you would be able to feel your own fingers.

Ah, they joys of your own rotten, ancient place - you wake up with frost on your bedsheets and your washbasin shattered from the ice within it. There were other rooms in the place, but most had holes in the ceiling or were too big to heat effectively. So now, you were going to live in one room, that you'd yet to figure out how to run electricity to, and only leave for class or the bathroom. Even if you were ill, could anyone blame you for still going to class when your own home had a nasty quirk of being even colder than outside?

Anywho, it was time to do some homework. By the light of an oil lamp. In five layers of clothing. Curled up so close to a tiny fire you might as well be inside of it. While your not-a-cat complained the whole time.

Yaaaaaaay.

~*~*~*~

"You really should be resting."

You scoffed. "You just feel bad because you're the one who got me sick."

"You can't prove that, everyone's had a cold the past few weeks."

"No one else has been exploring my tonsils, dude."

Idia clapped a hand on your mouth, which you did not lick solely because you were wearing a cloth mask. "Quiet! That's secret intel."

"What? No it's not, everyone knows."

"I don't want to advertise. Then I'm a raid boss and you're the rare loot drop."

You elbowed him in his boney ribs. "No one's going to kick your ass out of jealousy. Just because I'm the hottest bitch in this place doesn't mean I've got universal appeal."

"You're still the only girl and people are weird about it." He placed the back of his hand on your forehead and winced. "You're too warm."

"How can you tell? You've got gloves on."

"That's how bad it is. I'll make some tea."

"I'm not drinking anything out of the damned lab equipment."

He frowned. "I've never had anything bad happen, it's cleaned correctly."

"You're smarter than that. One of these days you're going to grow a tail due to residue in the glassware, and I'm going to haul you around in front of god and everyone by it, going 'I told you so' the entire time."

He blanched, knowing that that was not an idle threat, and someone laughed. "I think I should make that happen, just so we can see that."

"Jade, no. No magic mushrooms for my man, or any other concoctionary bullshit either."

Idia looked ready to die, so to take attention off of him you leaned over and poked Silver awake before he fell face first in the potion he was working on. Logically, you know his narcolepsy was debilitating. Right now, you wish you could have borrowed it last night. You don't remember walking up during the night, but you must have, because why else would you be so tired?

He started up, mumbled "thank you" and went back to stirring as if he hadn't been about to drown in dubious magichemicals. God, you wished that was you right now.

"Idia, deal. You help me get through this class, I'll grab some hot food and go home."

He made a show of hemming and hawing before saying, "Grimm needs to let me hold him when I drop you off, and I will."

Ordinarily, you would have just said "Ask him yourself and don't be weird about it," and Grimm would have simply told him no until sufficiently bribed. But Grimm was still in bed at home, saying you kept him up all night, so instead you bumped Idia with your hip and said "What, you can't think to ask for better pussy to fondle?"

Of course, you just had to say something crass at the moment where everyone went quiet. Even Crewel raised his head and both eyebrows at you. The only reason you didn't get a riding crop to the face and a week in horny detention (where, you assumed, they punished you for being a bad girl indeed) was Idia, rapidly going through every stage of confusion and grief, with a few currently unknown to man. You'd intended to tease him, but that sheer amount of confused, horny misery on his face was just too much, and you laughed so hard you bent over.

And coughed. In a short time, there was no laughter left, only miserable coughing from the depths of your chest that left you on the floor with your eyes watering. Someone thumped your back a few times, and when you yanked your mask off to catch a proper, if shallow breath, your mask was full of a red-streaked, pus coloured slime.

A fur coat was draped over your shoulders as everyone made various noises of disgust. "Class dismissed. Let's get you to the nurses."

~*~*~*~

"How in hell are you still mobile."

"Pettiness and a desire to not freeze to death."

Crewel narrowed his eyes at you. "Both lungs."

"That is what double pneumonia means, Professor."

You could see his whip fingers itching. "Yes, well. You can't come to class like that. And... Is it really that bad in Ramshackle?"

Idia raised a hand. "It was really cold the last time I was there."

"Ugh. I told Crowley we should have razed the place for an expansion on my dog run." He looked at you with a curious mix of genuine fondness and even more genuine disgust. "I'm not putting you up until your place gets fixed, you'll leak all over my furniture. Anyone here going to babysit?"

"I've done perfectly fine in my own dorm, I don't need to become the pet of another dorm."

"Those little fairies said that if you don't stay on bedrest and stay warm, you will die. I am not filling out that paperwork." He looked to you classmates. "Speak up or I'm docking a letter grade."

Silver raised a hand. "I think we could do it but I don't think D- Lilia would let me. Malleus would end up trying to play nurse and skip class."

"Oh god, no, we don't tell him I'm sick until I'm safely ensconced somewhere, he would lose his damn mind and I'd try to strangle him after a week of it."

"There are no spare rooms in Octanivelle. However, I could try some experimental medicines I've been-"

"Jade, no."

Idia was quiet, before speaking up. "I... I don't know if Ignihyde has a spare room, or would be good for healing."

He'd not left your side since your collapse, and gone so full of writhing, barely concealed anxiety he'd broke through the other side and simply shut off. You didn't get it, it wasn't actually anything serious. The nurses had pumped you full of medicine, you'd be up and about a week or two at the most, instead of the month's worth of hospital rooms and bad food it would have been.

Crewel sighed. "Time to start checking the files to see where you can be squeezed."

There was a cough, from the fifth student so quiet despite his size. Everyone had honestly forgotten he was there.

When he spoke up, it was to you, and not anyone else. "There's an unoccupied room down the hall from me. I think the weather in the Savannahclaw dorms will be good for your health. You shouldn't have to stay where you won't be wanted, or get sicker. Would that work?"

You looked at him, assessing. You and him hadn't talked overmuch, and he didn't seem to mind. But as severe as he looked? You could see the sincerity in his offer.

"That should work. Jack, right?"

His ears flicked, and his tail twitched. "Yes."

"Thank you, Jack. You're very kind."

~*~*~*~

Easy to see why the room was empty. You suspected it might have been a storage room, or that there had been a monastic order in the dorm at one point. A single bed just fit the far wall, with a chair, a desk, a bureau, and little else. But the far wall had a large window, and the room felt... nice. And a hell of a lot warmer than than your room in Ramshackle.

"It'll make an excellent sickroom." You set your schoolbag and an entire case of tissues on the desk. "Thank you again, Jack. You sure it won't be any trouble?"

"I've already cleared it with our dorm leader, he said he doesn't care as long as you don't rub phlegm on his things." Jack was a solid block of frown and muscle in the corner. "The window does open, you should keep it that way for circulation. There's a bathroom down the hall, there's showers in there. If you need anything or anyone tries to bother you, please let me know."

"Will do." You were already unpacking the few things in your bag, trying to get them arranged before another coughing fit took you.

"I can help get your things, if you need?" For a dude who was very do-that-shit-yourself, he was being very helpful.

"Idia's grabbing Grimm and anything else I'll need. He'll know what I want."

"I see." Silence, and more interesting ear flicks. "So."

"So?"

"You and him are..." He made a guesture with interlaced fingers.

"Yeah. Jealous?"

He snorted. "No. Just curious. He's a bit..." Hand wiggle.

"I'm a bit too. It works. Would have been nice if he'd gotten the hint before I had a ghost turn me inside out in front of him and everyone else."

"You know that's why you're so sick, right?"

You made a noise that was hard to decipher, that he used as cue to continue. "You never smelled quite right after that happened. Even after the healing. You're always a little..." He moved his hands, trying to grasp the right simile. "Like when a flower's starting to drop petals. Overripe."

How in the hell were you supposed to take that. What do you even say to that? Does everyone know you smell? Does - 

"Oh god, you all know when I'm on the rag."

A single, curt nod, and you put your head in your hands and groaned.

~*~*~*~

A knock on the door

"Who is it?"

"Your worst enemy."

"Get your ass in here, Vil."

Vil had on... good lord. Mask, gloves, face shield. An absurdly fashionable CDC agent. "You look like shit."

"Thanks, Vil. Means so much coming from you."

He stayed by the door, ready to flee if a spare germ came floating towards him. "Heard you're out of commission. Thank the seven, I'll get some peace in my life."

You flipped him the bird, but smiled as you did. "Don't say that. I'll made a sheet ladder and mix sputum in your cold cream."

"If you do that I will personally burn your clothes and replace them with something decent that you will hate."

"Try. Come to gloat?"

"Just a bit." He set a large cup with a straw at the very edge of the desk, straining at arm's length as he did. "This should unfuck your throat somewhat."

"Such language!" You waited until he retreated to the door before you took the smoothie. It was... very, very purple, and smelled minty. "Trying to poison me, finally?"

He rolled his eyes. "When I decide to poison you, it's not going to be through something that obvious. You will never see it coming, and then I'll sell your corpse to Floyd and everyone will just think he finally decided to go full crazy and Riddle is next."

You snorted. "Honestly? I think he'd shit his pants if I actually returned the affection. One time I saw Riddle give him a genuine smile and he had to go sit down because he started shaking so bad." That might have been because the smile was caused by Floyd cracking his head on a doorway and falling flat on his ass, but the point still stood.

When he stopped laughing, he turned to leave. "Take at least an extra week to get better, for my sanity. And don't give the creature any, it won't agree with him."

"Shh, I just got him down for his nap-"

Grimm made a horrible snort from your feet and say up. "Food?"

You made a look-what-you-did guesture at Vil, but he left instead of helping you deal with your beloved yowling idiot.

~*~*~*~

You woke up coughing in the dark. It took entirely too long for you to figure out where the hell you were, and why, and you took the offered tissue with great-

"JaySUS FUCKING CHRIST" You jumped back so much it was only Malleus's grip on your arm that kept you from going through the open window.

"People are sleeping, please do not yell."

"Don't yell my ass, how long have you been there?"

He shrugged. "Since before sunset. Ortho was here first."

You leaned around Mal, to see Ortho sitting on the desk, scritching the belly of a drowsing Grimm. "Hello, Yuu. Your fever has gone down half of a degree since I took over."

The audacity of these idiots, you swear. "Both of you go home and go to bed."

"No. You need watching." Mal had not blinked once since you'd woken up, and how about that? His eyes glowed in the dark, or he had very strong eyeshine; either way, there was no iris around the blown out pupil. "You are very ill and need taken care of. I can do that, I took care of Silver when he was ill."

"Mal."

"Yes?"

"Do we need another boundaries talk?"

He frowned. "But you are ill."

"Mal, I will call Lilia and tell him what you are doing right now. I will personally write your grandmother and tell her you're neglecting your studies. I will get Leona down here and he will call you a simp until you go outside and fight him on compulsion."

"Those all sound terrible!"

"Ortho, don't kiss up because you're next. Why are you here and not home charging?"

"Idia wouldn't go home to sleep until I said I would let him know if you got worse."

You opened your mouth, and shut it again. Why's he so worried? You had to physically shove him out the door to go to his next class, looking like his heart would break, and he'd still skipped board games to fidget miserably in the chair Mal now sat in, looking ready to burst into tears every time you coughed.

Ortho seemed to read your mind. "He gets worried when people get sick. I got sick once."

Ah. That explained a hell of a lot that you were too polite to ask.

"... Okay, you can stay."

Mal perked up.

"You go home. I'll never go back to sleep if you keep staring all night, and you do need to sleep some."

Mal's face fell.

"You can come back tomorrow, after class."

He perked back up. "Goodnight, Yuu. I will see you tomorrow!" A brief kiss against your sweating temple, and he was out the same window he most likely came in.

"Hey, Ortho?"

"Yes?"

"If you can dim your lights a little, you can come lie down with me."

~*~*~*~

You were rudely poked awake by a giant asshole.

"Why are you in my nap room." Leona hovered over you with obvious displeasure.

You blinked and sorted yourself. Ortho was crammed between you and the window, hopefully dreaming of electric sheep, and Grimm was still dead asleep, the little bastard. "Jack put me up here because my dorm's a block of ice and I can't stay there on doctor's orders." Crewel might have a doctorate, it's not a lie.

"Why didn't he tell me?"

"I did." Jack was behind him, his own link in a chain of hovering displeasure. "You said it was fine as long as she didn't make a mess. I brought yogurt."

"Thank you-" More miserable coughing, with now everyone either rubbing your back or passing you tissues. Except Leona, who simply held back and watched. By the time you were done, he just nodded.

"I'm not moving you, but..."

"What."

"I'm calling in a favour next time Cheka gets pawned off on me. He likes you."

You'd argue that, but you liked the kid. "Aight. Everyone get out, there's too many fucking people in here and I'm discovering new and interesting depths of claustrophobia."

Leona didn't need to be told twice.

"I'll be back after class with your homework. Maybe at lunch with something. Not before then. Stay put."

"Oooo, oo. I'm going with you, big guy." Grimm scampered over. "I'll get bored here all day. You can just nap."

You rolled your eyes "I can just nap. Jack, if he sticks with you, he's going to want to eat everything you do."

"I'll manage."

"Would you like me to stay?" Ortho was finally up, or maybe you hadn't noticed him exiting screensaver mode.

"I'd like you to tell your brother that I'm not going anywhere. Use those exact words."

He nodded, a faint whirr as he did.

"I'll see you guys later, okay? I need more sleep."

~*~*~*~

Someone gently shook you awake, and said someone was leaning in the window.

"Hey, Kalim." Why'd you have to be the center of attention when sick, and therefore couldn't kiss anyone to thank them for said attention.

"Hi! I asked Jamil to make extra lunch for you!" He set a covered dish on your knees.

"Thank you. Was he okay with that?"

"He was when I said it was for you. Everyone's heard that you're laid up!"

"News travels fast. Am I about to get even more popular?"

"You're always popular because you're great. Feel better! Jamil said he'll have extras tomorrow too. See you!" And off he went.

You needed to tell Jamil thank you, but he would probably just tell you to just stop talking about abolishing the monarchy instead. (Not because he didn't support the idea, but because he didn't want to be punished for not keeping the idea from Kalim.) What did he make, anyway?

"Oh, curry. Sweet."

~*~*~*~

The days progressed roughly the same. Drowsing most of the morning, lunch, more drowsing in between laptop stuff, maybe actual sleep. Coughing up far less gunk as the days went on. And entertaining an absurd fucking amount of people. Everyone seemed determined to check on you, even people who you'd never seen before in your life; Ruggie made something like 10k madol charging people to try and see you through the window before you cursed him out. Your Heartslabyul boys dropped in every couple of days to relate shit that they hadn't simply texted you (along with a pile of pastries from Trey and handwritten instructions on recovery from Riddle, the latter far less appreciated than the former). Floyd dropped in once to mostly complain about how you weren't around to eat the mushrooms he picked out of his food, tried to convince you to let him carry you over to the Monstro Lounge himself, and when you refused, kissed the tips of your fingers and left pouting. Jack, true to his word, dropped in at least twice a day to deliver food and homework, and once spent forty-five minutes glowering at anyone approaching the bathrooms while you took a shower that ached on your oversensitive skin.

Some people were far more regular. Every day like clockwork, Malleus perched in your window and was the world's friendliest, most affectionate vulture. Twenty minutes after that, Idia would come in, sit in the chair, and exude such concentrated grief that you were at a loss for what to do beyond asking if he wanted to talk about it, to which he would shake his head and simply resume sitting there, tapping away at his screens until the next panicked flurry of activity every time you made a unhealthy noise.

"You are allowed to go home. I'm not going anywhere, and I'm much better than I was."

He just shook his head.

"I will come get you if something happens," Mal offered.

More head shaking, and a "no" from his tablet, before adding, "Never again."

"I'll call Ortho and make him tag you out."

"I said no. And Ortho is with Lilia."

Lilia, small, beloved pest, has what you like to think of as a compulsive need to parent. He was god knows how old, had raised at least three of your classmates that you know of, and seemed to consider you his newest fledgling. After hearing about what happened, he'd taken it into his own hands to fix Ramshackle to... well, not OSHA compliance, but you wouldn't be cold.

"Does he know how much I appreciate it? Appreciate all of you, really?"

"Of course he does. He loves talking about you. He wears that shirt you made all the time."

"Which one? I've made him seven so far."

"When do I get one?"

"When they make T shirts that'll fit over your horns." Something drooped in the corner of your eye, and you looked over to see Idia shaking himself upright. "Hey, babe. When was the last time you slept?"

He took an embarrassingly long time to lie through his teeth and say "Last night" through his tablet.

"Yeah, no. Get over here." You took a moment to drag Mal's hand down before he could just do a sleeping spell, or something equally well meaning but deeply inappropriate.

"No."

"Please?"

You held your arms out until he couldn't resist, and soon you'd arranged his head on your chest.

"You hear anything more sloshing around in there?"

He shook his head.

"I am on the mend. I... don't really know what happened before. And I sure as hell don't know what you did to get him back. But I'm not going anywhere. So rest." 

He gave a faint nod.

"I will wake you, if need be?"

To both yours and Mal's surprise, Idia answered him with a pat on his leg.

"Thank you."

Idia was already asleep.

~*~*~*~

"Mal?"

"Yes?"

"Do you know what 'cyanosis' is?" You’d been stroking Idia's head for hours. Or minutes. Time flies, and you could not tell the difference.

"Not immediately, no."

"It's caused by a few different things. Hypoxia, hypothermia, that sort of thing. The blood in you doesn't have enough oxygen. So little that, instead of red, parts of your body turn blue or grey due to the lack of oxygen."

"I see." He looked intently, much as you did, at Idia's greyish nails and blue lips. "That doesn't seem survivable."

"Not if it's severe, no." The flames from Idia's head curled around your fingers, grasping at you even when he's not aware of it. "It's not something you see on someone as... lively as him. It's something I think about a lot. Whether it's to do with his magic, or that curse he won't elaborate on."

"I've heard rumours."

"Oh?"

"The Shroud family curse. Nothing concrete, for an origin. Madness, misfortune, and illness have plagued the family throughout history. Add in a trend of cousin marriage beyond the norm for upper-class families due to people not wanting to subject their loved ones to a cursed bloodline, and the tree is more of an notorious, ingrown shrub."

"That just sounds like shitty genetics and what happens to every family as the years go on, not a curse."

Mal shrugged. "is there a difference? Even in the sleeping curse my grandmother bestowed so easily, much of the power came for the fear of it. A girl grew up without her family because of the fear of it."

"True." You leaned down and kissed the top of Idia's head, feeling an unconscious smile as you did. "There must be a little hereditary something. He gets so anxious about this beautiful hair! He hates people looking at him, and he doesn't even realize it's because he's the most beautiful thing in any room he walks in."

"Thing?" Mal raised an amused eyebrow.

"Even the finest art in a museum doesn't have the benefit of being actually alive."

"Your capacity for love and beauty is enviable. Hunt would be jealous." He reached out and brushed a stray lock away from Idia's face, and you could feel another smile against your chest.

~*~*~*~

"Aight, so we've patched up holes in the walls, insulated the windows - Idia here," Lilia clapped Idia on the small of his back, causing him to make a distressed squeak - "smart boy, found some solar panels and we've got electricity up in your room, the kitchen and the bathroom by your room, not just the front room anymore! The rest we got the ghosts to help seal off to hold the heat in. I got you a space heater for your room, so you don't have to do a fire the whole time, and as long as you don't open the windows back up before spring, you won't freeze."

"Thanks, guys. One question."

"Yeah?"

"What did you do to my room."

Lilia smiled. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You're a walking prank and can't keep out of there, what did you do."

"Nothing this time! I promise!" He held his hands up. "At least you can stay home for the next few days, Crewel says you gotta be back Monday or he's going to start making funeral prep."

"I'm literally better, but if he does that I get to help. Always wanted to plan my funeral, I have very specific ideas about what flowers to use and preferred corpse disposal."

"Maybe you should go upstairs and not talk about funerals and their associated things."

"Sure thing, dear."

After settling in your room, most everyone cleared out, even Idia. The only person still there was Jack, looking this way and that with a stern look.

"Hey, Jack?"

He grunted in assent.

"So like, why'd you put me up and help take care of me? We've hardly talked before then."

He sighed. "You've been very nice to me."

"You sure? I'd remember you."

"Uh."

"Jack?"

~*~*~*~

It was a beautiful day, if chilly in the wind. The sun was warm, the trees turning, and you just came across one of your best friends.

"Hi buddy! Are you lost today?"

The very large dog shook it's head and pressed into your knees.

"Okay, you wanna walk with me? Come on."

You'd found this enormous white Malamute wandering campus the first time a few months ago, and after checking in with a few other students who kept laughing when you asked if he was their dog, simply decided to enjoy your new friend and run and play. He was very smart, and initially standoffish, but could not resist a friendly face and good ear scritches. Today, you and Buddy here simply ran around like a couple of idiots after a lost soccer ball until it was time to go eat.

"I'll see you later, buddy. Bye!" You held out a hand, and after a firm shake, kissed the point where his snout met the rest of his face. "Stay safe, I love you."

Buddy made a low grumble and rubbed his paws over his face, and you went off to supper.

~*~*~*~

"You couldn't have told me?"

"How do you explain that? 'Hey, I run around as a wolf sometimes and you mistook me for a lost dog so you lovebombed me and I was at a loss and by the second time it was too awkward to say anything'?"

"I've been playing with you for months! I let you run with Crewel's dalmatians!"

"I run with them as a person, too, that's nothing special."

You pinched your nose. "Everyone must think I'm an idiot."

"I'll deal with them. I'm sorry, Yuu."

"I know. You are my good boy, after all."

His tail started wagging in spite of itself, and you laughed.

[polar534]

Jersey Stealing Pt. 4

Titan, this was a lot longer then I had ever planned on it being. I started writing Jersey Stealing I want to say MONTHS ago. You guys have only recently seen the parts that have been sitting done for ages. I guess it's just a side effect of this being my secondary, recovery project. Something fun I can write up while I'm at work.

Anyways, I'll stop babbling now and let y'all get to the well deserved end to this arc. This one is long. It's got a lot of loose threads tied up and it's also got my first instance of me ever typing out 'I love you' in any sort of writing... so that's a thing. Hopefully I did it alright.

(If you like this/want to read the other parts/want to figure out what the heck this Hockey AU is in the first place, consider checking out the MasterPost.)

***

Amity tapped her fingers, the sharp sound echoing loudly throughout the empty house. Sighing, she pushed her chair out and set aside the homework she was working on. The quiet nature of the house was almost physically bothering her as she walked to the window.Opening up to the sounds of the street below and woods behind, Amity took a deep breath and let the sounds comfort the growing restlessness creeping into her bones. Normally on the days she didn't have practice, both her and Luz would spend the evening in the Boiling Isles, visiting Lilith and Eda at the palace. There was always something to do, and Eda in particular was always looking for some excuse to sneak away from her duties even for just a little bit. It was something they both looked forward to. A time in which everyone could catch up, Gus and Willow included, outside of school or Willow and Amity's games.

However, today was different. Luz had a lot less shine in her eyes as Amity said goodbye to her at the portal, something that rarely happened. It only furthered Amity's resolve in her decision to stay behind and find some sort of resolution to the incident that now had been plaguing her girlfriend for almost a week.

The itching in her bones began to crawl into her skin as Amity felt her restlessness increase. Moving to the bed she grabbed some shoes and slid them on, making sure to grab her stick and jersey on the way out the door. Even if it was late, she knew Luz wouldn't be home anytime soon, and there was no telling when Camilla would be off of work. Equipment in hand, she moved down the street quickly, the daylight slowly fading behind her.

***

Crack!

The slam of the puck against the stick offered little resistance to Amity's swing as she continued the course she had designed for herself. Lapping the rink she crashed into the football training dummy she and the team had borrowed (stolen) from the local highschool. Feeling the weighted dummy barely move against the slick ice had her hitting the next lap even faster then the first.

Crack!

This time the swing was straight through the puck, almost as if Amity was merely cutting through the air with her motions. The puck flew through the air and pushed the netting of the goal to it's limit as the witch ducked her head down and lapped the rink a second time, building up speed to once again charge the dummy. Her chest heaved as her feet slowed in their steps, the ice now almost like water under her skates. There was no more traction to be gained and she instead allowed her body to continue it's momentum as she practically soared towards her goal. Her mind emptied as she plowed into the object in front of her, shoulder out, intending to cause as much damage as possible. This time, the metal sled holding the dummy up slid effortlessly through the ice as it flew backwards. The force of her impact wasn't clean though. Losing her balance and with too much speed to stop, Amity careened around the edge of where the dummy had stopped and she hit the ice hard. The green-haired girl barely registered the pain as her stick flew from her hand and she was left spinning out on the ice.

The witch panted heavily as she lay on the frozen rink, completely dazed, her heartbeat thudding so loudly in her ears that she could barely think.

As the pain of her fall caught up with her, so did the emotions she had tried to outrun for the past week. She wasn't aware of the first tear that slipped down the side of her cheek, but the many following after had her face almost bitterly cold in chilly temperature of the arena. A question repeated in her mind over and over.

Why?

The tears didn't bother her. Neither did the reason she was shedding them.

Why?

What bothered her most was Luz. Why was this the thing, this hope, this person, the one thing to break Luz like Amity had never seen? Why did this emotion, this defeat, seem to haunt Luz like a ghost that was all too familiar? Amity's heart broke for Luz, and maybe she was finally allowing herself to feel the pain, the burden she had tried carrying since she had seen it. Her mind raced to fill in the gaps and answer the questions as the adrenaline from her training began to crash and her body melted further into the ice.

She thought about all she knew and had learned about Luz's history in her own world. This world that Amity now had become a part of. It seemed like every day was a struggle for Luz, her wild and dangerous ideas being so obviously unappealing to others. Forcibly being isolated, even when you are trying to reach out was a lot different from how Amity grew up. She was always welcome, but never felt like she belonged… never wanted to.

'I think that’s why Luz held on to the hope that one day they could be friends'

It was Luz's connection to Amity that severed the last chance of her bonding to her past. It was the step over the line for Sasha, the person Luz had hung her last hopes on before she met Willow, before she met Gus, before she met Amity.

The adrenaline was gone. Her body aching, Amity crawled her way to her feet feeling more hollow then ever before. Slowly, she slid the training dummy off the ice, and grabbed her stick. Her eyes glanced to the puck that was still in the empty space of the goal as she packed the last of her equipment away. Glancing at her phone she saw that there were missed messages.

-I'm home now.

Missed Call from Luz

-Amity?

-Where are you?

-I hope you're ok.

Amity took one last look at the ice behind her before she tapped out a quick response, slinging her jersey off and over her shoulder as she walked out of the building.

-Sorry. I was practicing.

-I'll be home soon.

***

Amity crept up the stairs and to the bedroom. Peeking open the door slowly she saw that Luz was curled up on the bed, wrapped up snugly in a blanket and using a small lamp to read by. As soon as the door opened her eyes shot up and the ghost of a smile lit up her face in the relative darkness.

"Ahhh, there she is!"

Amity smiled back as she wormed her way further into the room and set her equipment down. Kicking off her shoes she sat down on the edge of the bed as Luz set her book down and clung onto her back, her head resting comfortably in the crook of the witch's neck.

"I'm sorry I was late." Amity mumbled quietly as she leaned her face into Luz's, enjoying her girlfriend's warmth as it chased away the bite of cold that still lingered from the rink.

"I am too." Luz rumbled back into her ear as she squeezed her arms tightly around the witch's torso and pulled her fully down onto the bed.

"Oh? Miss me much Noceda?" Amity teased as they both wrapped the blanket around them and settled in, Luz in Amity's arms.

Luz merely responded with a low growl as she snuggled further into the other's girls embrace, making sure her face was buried into Amity's chest. After a moment of enjoying being close and together again, Luz finally lifted her face. Her eyes were tired, but they held the shine of curiosity that Amity was used to. Deep in those wide brown eyes there was a flicker of the Luz she knew and loved.

Then that flicker faded.

"So… you were out pretty late."

Amity nodded. It wasn't an accusation, just a comment. It didn't stop the guilt from rushing in however.

"I know. I'm sorry. I was caught up in practicing and didn't realize the time."

"Lokte's brother stopped by earlier." Luz said calmly.

Amity's blood froze. It wasn't as if she wanted to hide what she had been up to for the last few days, but rather didn't want to worry Luz any more then she already was. It was too late now though.

"He wanted to apologize. For what happened at the game. He looked pretty spooked. Guess Lokte didn't go easy on him."

"I wouldn't either." Amity growled stiffly. It may have been a genuine mistake, but that didn't mean the threat didn't bother her. What was worse was that Luz still seemed completely calm. Amity didn't know what to expect. Would she be mad? Or just disappointed?

Silence fell between the pair.

"You talked with them today… didn't you?"

There was another moment of silence before Amity nodded. Luz continued to face away from her, but the witch knew that her girlfriend knew the answer before she had asked. After a few more agonizing seconds, Luz finally faced her. The smallest sliver of a smile crept it's way on her face, and the light in her eyes seemed to come back ever so slightly.

"Sooo… just how obnoxious is Bryce?" Luz asked, gently teasing. Her light voice instantly broke through the stiff air between them.

Amity let out a sigh of relief as she laughed a bit to herself.

"I have no idea how you put up with him at all. He's got to be one of the dullest people I have ever met. I told him multiple times I was your girlfriend and he still couldn't take the hint! He kept trying to ask me out." The witch growled lowly, unconsciously squeezing Luz tighter.

"Oh. Huh..." Luz hummed thoughtfully.

"Luz there was no way I was going to say yes. You know that right?"

Luz sat up and waved her hand as if dismissing Amity's thought.

"Yeah of course I know that." She assured the witch almost like an after thought, now looking curiously out the window. "It's just weird. Bryce isn't the type to ask girls out. He just hasn't ever been interested in dating before."

"Could've fooled me." Amity grumbled unhappily, Byrce's aggressive way of flirting still very much prevalent in her mind.

Luz turned back to her with another smile, this one supportive and warm.

"Oh Ami. He's still very much a trashbag." Luz said slowly, her distaste for Bryce very barely hidden. "You didn't have to go talk to them for me you know." She added after a pause, her voice growing quiet.

"Well. Let's see, they threatened you, called you a liar and then tried to go on with their life as if everything was ok. As if there wasn't any consequences." Amity listed as she stared at the ceiling and counted on her fingers. After thinking for awhile she stared hard at Luz. "Yeah. I wasn't about to let that happen."

Luz's smile grew a little more genuine as both girls looked at each other. She leaned back up against Amity as they settled back down into the bed. There wasn't anything more to say.

"So practicing huh? Did you use the football dummy?" Luz asked suddenly and excitedly.

Amity couldn't help but smile, it had been Luz's idea to use it (steal it) in the first place.

"It was a little weird to use, but honestly on the second try I sent it flying."

"Awesome." Luz breathed. "I demand you take me along next time."

Amity laughed. "You've been spending too much time with King." She teased gently as she sat up to lean against the bed frame. Luz promptly flopped across her lap and uncovered her book from earlier to flip open.

"Nonsense." The human girl dismissed as her eyes began to scan the pages again.

"What are you reading anyways?" Amity asked after a pause told her the conversation might be over.

"Shhhhhhh." Luz reached over and lazily flopped a hand against Amity's face in an attempt to gently shush her. "I'm almost done with this scene."

Raising an eyebrow, Amity patiently waited, unaware that she and Luz would soon spend the next 2 hours getting into the first book of a brand new series. After thoroughly researching to find out that yes, the rest of the series was available at the library, the two girls settled in for the night. As they were drifting off, Luz holding Amity tightly to her chest, the witch had almost completely forgotten about the trials they had both been through. The weight of their trauma seemed so far away, lost in the warmth of the blankets and her girlfriend's arms.

No matter what happened, if every day ended with Luz right beside her, Amity knew they could and they would survive anything that life threw at them.

Above her, Luz buried her face into her hair, breathing in deeply as sleep overtook her.

"…mity…" She mumbled sleepily.

Amity couldn't help but giggle a bit. Luz hated falling asleep, always clinging to her consciousness despite how exhausted she was. Always finding some excuse to stay up just a little longer.

"Yes?"

"… thanks."

Amity's ears twitched before a small smile appeared on her face. She snuggled into Luz further.

"Anytime." The witch reassured her as she heard her girlfriend sigh happily above her. The room grew quiet once again and Amity was almost fully asleep by the time Luz spoke next.

"I love you."

The heat rushed to Amity's cheeks, as it always did when she heard those 3 little words. Her heart skipped a bit as it beat faster in it's desperate attempt to return the affection.

"I love you too Luz."

***

Luz didn't return to normal right away, though the night clearly had an effect on her. However, it never took long for the unbreakable spirit of Luz Noceda to rear it's head again and soon enough, The Otter's hockey practice was once again filled with the sounds of rambunctious applause and cheering. The entire team seemed to be effected by the return of their number 1 fan as they all began to work harder, feeling the hope return. After all, they were 4-1 and were still riding high on their winning streak.

Amity and Lokte especially felt the effects of Luz's return to form, not only on a personal level, but also with the renewed gusto of their team.

Which is why, on the last practice before their big game, everything came to an almost halt as the door of the rink opened and a stranger appeared looking very lost.

It wasn't as if the majority of the team knew this new person, but they recognized the bad news this person brought as their star player completely froze. Amity recognized the figure immediately. She was already furiously skating off the ice as they started to approach Luz, Lokte quickly calling for a 5 minute break behind her. Up in the stands, Luz looked up, surprised to see a face beside her in the usually barren stands. She was even more surprised by just how familiar the face was.

Beside her, Sasha was clenching tightly to her arm, looking absolutely everywhere but at Luz herself. She looked like she was trying to form a sentence as the commotion on the ice finally caught up to them. Both girls turned to see Amity, desperately pulling off her skates in the players box, her face furious.

"Wait! Wait! I can explain!" Sasha called out as they watched Lokte skate up next to Amity who growled out a quick response. Now both players seemed set on heading up to the stands, completely uncaring about the former bullies cry.

Luz didn't know what to do. Her mind had frozen when she saw Sasha and not knowing what to think, she didn’t know what to say. Her eyes were locked on Lokte and Amity as they started climbing the stairs to where she was, feeling almost grateful that she would have some sort of backup in just a few moments.

It wasn't that she was scared, but her chest seemed to ache the same way it had the last couple of days and she was acutely aware that she seemed to shrink in Sasha's presence. Luz knew that she hadn't been herself in the days following her encounter with Sasha and Bryce before. It had taken a lot out of her, and although she always wanted to look for the best in people, she wasn't keen to repeat that experience.

Especially with how worried Amity had been.

"Ok. Well since it definitely seems like I'm about to be chased from this place," Sasha spoke up, interrupting Luz's fleeting thoughts and quickly turning to her with wide eyes. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry. Really. I'm not looking for any sort of forgiveness. I don't… I don't deserve that. Not yet. Maybe not ever. I just… I was hoping we could talk."

Luz merely blinked, her mind swirling. She was still very much aware of her girlfriend closing in on them, and Sasha's already flighty behavior. She knew she needed to make a move to stop something from happening but she couldn't think past the girl's words.

'I'm sorry'

"You… wanted to talk?" Luz finally choked out, finding some sort of sticking point to allow herself to speak again.

Sasha almost looked a little sheepish, her fearful eyes darting back and forth between the hockey players quickly coming up the stairs and the girl she had hurt.

"Yeah. For all the years I've known you… I realized I know absolutely nothing about you." The blonde haired girl laughed.

The laugh was so genuine that Luz couldn't help but laugh with her. After all, everything she said was true. They had known each other for a long time, but they were still practically complete strangers. It was Luz who had always wanted that to change, but Sasha had never made an attempt to fix anything between them before. Time was running out however as Sasha turned to leave, clearly afraid of the players coming up the steps.

She was quickly stopped by Luz's hand on her arm.

"Hey! I thought I told you not to go near her again!" Amity snarled, now being close enough to yell.

Luz could feel the shiver of fear that shot through Sasha as Amity bared her fangs. Again, she couldn't help but smile, after all, Amity was pretty terrifying when she wanted to be. Looking absolutely ready to bolt, Sasha turned to Luz with wide eyes, clearly praying that this wasn't some big trap. Luz only winked as a response.

Letting her arm go, Luz stood up and put herself between Amity and Sasha, holding her arms out to the side to fully block the girl behind her.

Amity froze as Lokte stopped on the steps below her, their arms crossing in frustration.

"Luz?" The witch asked tentatively. Her voice was full of concern and worry, all traces of anger almost completely fading as she stared at her girlfriend in confusion.

Luz took a deep breath.

"It's okay Ami. She just wants to talk."

Amity bristled in anger, but she did her best to remain calm. "Are you ok?"

Luz glanced behind her and took note of Sasha's wide, shocked eyes. Her face was blank as she turned back around to face her girlfriend.

"Give me a stick and I'll make sure she doesn't get too out of line." Luz smirked after a short pause.

A startled gasp from behind her had Lokte and Luz both laughing while Amity merely rolled her eyes. Taking a step forward she planted a kiss on her girlfriend's cheek.

"Let me know the moment she starts bothering you, ok?" Amity whispered. Luz caught her hand as she backed up again and held it tight as she flashed a confident smile.

"Of course." Luz grinned at her as she swung the witch's hand and let it go. "You just get back to practicing. No need to stop on my behalf."

"I could name several reasons." Lokte interjected, still looking rather distrustful of the girl tentatively peeking out from behind Luz.

Despite their reluctance, Amity nodded at Luz and dragged her friend back down to the rink. Luz watched them leave for just a bit before turning to Sasha with a grin.

"Alright. Crisis adverted." She laughed playfully. "Just be grateful she didn't jump at ya from the ceiling. I've seen it happen. It's not pretty."

Sasha laughed nervously. "So… does this mean we can talk?"

Luz laughed again as she fearlessly grabbed Sasha and forced her to sit next to her on the bleacher.

"Do you know how long I've been waiting to hear you ask me that?"

…

Amity slid into the seat next to Luz as she watched her teammates wrap up on the ice. Sasha had left only a little while ago and the witch could see a noticeable slouch to her girlfriends shoulders. Despite that, Luz barely moved as Amity gently reached for her hand.

"How are you doing?" She asked quietly, weaving her fingers through Luz's own.

After a short pause, Luz squeezed her fingers back and looked up at her with watery brown eyes. Amity immediately tensed. She didn’t trust that look and if Sasha had hurt her again…

Well the girl hadn't left that long ago, if she hurried, there was still a definite chance that the witch could catch her. She was preparing to grab her stick and hurry out the door as Luz finally spoke.

"We aren't friends yet…" Luz stated slowly, the light in her eyes vibrantly bright as she spoke.

"But it's a start."

[gellavonhamster]

cold weapons

Suicide Squad (2016) || Captain Boomerang/Katana || post-canon

ao3 link eng || this was first written and published on ao3 in Russian in 2017 but I didn't attempt to translate it into English back then.  

“So, what do you think of them?” Colonel Flag asks.

Tatsu puts the folder containing the rap sheet of Waylon Jones, better known as Killer Croc, on top of three other folders.

“They’re complicated,” she replies after giving it some thought.

The materials in these folders could have formed her first impression about the members of Task Force X – or, as Lawton has aptly put it, the Suicide Squad. Could have, but did not, because they were given their first task earlier than expected. Which is why she doesn’t say “villains” or “scoundrels” or “worst team imaginable” – her first impression of them was formed in combat, and then in an empty bar in Midway City where they all drank together thinking it may be the last drink in their lives. She remembers all of this and says ‘complicated’.  

“Very tactful of you,” the colonel chuckles. Then again, what kind of colonel is he now – an unwashed shirt, black circles under the eyes. Just another guy struggling with a deluge of work, a hard-hearted boss, and a troubled relationship with his girlfriend. “But yeah, they definitely aren’t simple,” continues Rick Flag, one of her few friends in the country that will never become her home, and Tatsu cannot suppress a tired smile.  

“You like them.”

“They’re… tolerable,” Rick admits, and takes another sip of coffee. Lately he seems to be living only on coffee and whiskey and the verb “must” and (so Tatsu supposes, although they don’t talk about that) the hope that June Moone, who still hasn’t fully recovered from all the horrors she’s been through, will be all right – and will stop isolating herself and avoiding him. These means for not letting yourself just fall down and never get up are far from being reliable, but Tatsu herself lives mostly on revenge and duty and, for that matter, whiskey as well, to a certain degree, so it’s not for her to judge. “Most of them, at least. All of them minus the Australian.”

“At least he’s a good fighter,” Tatsu points out. This is the only good thing she can say about Captain Boomerang with full confidence.  

“He’s not cut out for teamwork.”

“When we were fighting the Enchantress, it didn’t look to me like that.”

She does not put much meaning into these words. It’s just that at some point Captain Boomerang saved her, and she saved him – and good thing they’re even, because the last thing she needs is to owe a favour to someone so incompatible with the very concept of duty. She could have said much about the man who tried to escape at the very beginning of the mission and got a teammate killed (and for some reason stood up for El Diablo when Harley Quinn lashed out at him at the bar, and for some reason came back before the battle after trying to desert), but the only thing she’s sure of is that he’s a fine weapon; she can confirm that, being a weapon herself. At the end of the day, that is all that’s required from him.      

At the end of the day, that is all that’s required from her, too.

 ***

 It is possible that what she said about Digger Harkness sticks in Rick’s memory, because when the need to comb the area arises during the next mission, he sends the two of them to search through the same building.

“If he gets up to something, do whatever you want to him. No one’s gonna weep for him,” he flings off. This is in the heat of the moment, of course – Boomerang almost got into a fight with Killer Croc on the helicopter over some nonsense. Or rather, it was Croc that almost got into a fight with Boomerang after the latter provoked him. Complicated.  

“You heard that, darl?” Boomerang addresses her with a smile so wide as if he hasn’t heard the last remark. “I’m all yours.”

Tatsu looks the other way and pointedly takes her sword out of its sheath – not completely, just a little. No further comments follow, and they part company – Deadshot with Croc, Flag with his team of spec ops, Tatsu with Boomerang – and go on a recce.  

In the basement, they discover something that looks like a laboratory – if a place so far from being sanitary may even be called one. All their hopes to move without making a sound crumble as soon as they enter the room: the floor is covered with broken glass. Those who ran the place must have escaped in haste and couldn’t take the entire stock of the serum with them, so they opted to destroy most of it. Tatsu’s attention is immediately drawn to the object on the table in the middle of the room – a metal container with tubes going from it to several smaller vessels. She heads straight for the table, shards crunching underfoot. Boomerang follows her, apparently kicking the largest shards on purpose so that they fly in all directions.      

“Looks like a hooch still,” he comments, having come closer, and gives a whistle. “Whoa, fuck, is that blood?”

Compared to the first task of their squad, this one looks almost effortless. Two gangs, the members of one of which possess the formula of the serum that grants superpowers to those who take it. A gun battle, collateral damage, the entire district on lockdown. If a few people weren’t noticed literally floating through the sky, the police would have been handling this. But this is an emergency, which is why they’re here, and the flying gangsters aren’t flying anymore, for Lawton is an exceptionally good shot.    

As it turns out, the serum that sparked the conflict is based on metahuman blood – hardly donated voluntarily.

“I’ll contact Colonel Flag,” says Tatsu, eyes locked on the bloodied tubes, and then someone grabs her by the neck.

For the first time in her life, she really has to fight blindly – because her enemy is invisible.  

Later, when the dead bodies gradually become visible on the floor like an eerie animated movie, it turns out there were four of them. Before that, Tatsu manages to lose her sword, recapture it, almost choke when an invisible hand squeezes her neck, slash one of the attackers in half, and plunge the blade into another’s stomach. Boomerang takes care of the other two, knocking over the container in the process.    

Tatsu is listening to the silence that came after the fight, wondering if any other invisible foes are lurking around the corner, when she feels that something is wrong. Something is wrong with her – she just can't figure out what. Sometimes it happens that one feels unwell but cannot determine what exactly the problem is – she is experiencing something similar now. Until she realizes: the mask. Until she looks up and makes eye contact with Captain Boomerang, who is staring at her and grinning.  

“You lost anything, doll?” Harkness inquires innocently, with an emphasis on the last word, and his smile grows even wider and cockier.  

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. The invisible man she fought hand to hand tore off her mask, and she didn’t even notice. But her partner, blast him, did – and picked it up.  

“Give it back,” Tatsu demands, hand outstretched. She feels naked. In combat, during the mission, she is Katana, a single whole with her sword. A cold weapon. No one needs to see her face. Truly, if she was wearing only the mask and nothing else, she would have felt less exposed – all right, this is an overstatement, and she doesn’t even want to imagine such a situation. Meanwhile, Boomerang is in no hurry to return the mask.      

“What did ya call me when that fucker was about to stab me?” he asks. Tatsu clenches the sword hilt. There is no telling how many enemies drunk on the magic serum are hiding in this house, and he’s dawdling. “You said…”

Damn it, what did she say? She saw one of the invisibles creeping up on him while he was fighting another – a bloodstain was floating through the air. She shouted…

“I said ‘George’”. Isn’t your name George Harkness?”

“You bet it is. It’s just weird. Most people don’t call me George, y’know.”  

“How do they call you then?”

“Digger. Boomerang. Boomer. That Prick. All sorts of things, but never George. But you,” he winks, “can call me whatever ya want. I liked the way you say my name.”

“Give. Me. The mask.”

“And the magic word?”

“I will chop your hand off,” as a proof of her intentions, she puts the blade against his extended hand that is holding her mask. In fact, she would face no consequences for doing so. No one’s gonna weep for him.      

Harkness makes a helpless gesture and hands her the mask.

“Can’t say no to you, luv.”

The mask helps her conceal her identity, but what is more important is that it helps her conceal needless emotions. Tatsu really hopes that her facial expression isn’t giving away that she’s ill at ease now. This is a weakness; weaknesses are not to be demonstrated. She feels deeply relieved when she puts the mask back on.  

“Let’s get out of here,” she commands, turns around, and heads for the exit. Harkness trails behind.

“It ain’t fair, by the way. You know my real name, but I don’t know yours,” he muses. “Care to introduce yourself, eh?”  

He asks the same question at least three times more before they return to Belle Reve, and each time she ignores him.

 ***

 A week later, he still doesn’t know her name – but he learns something else.

They do away with the last members of the recent gang on the outskirts of the city. Both wretches have overused the unfortunate serum, in keeping with the best traditions of the clichéd movies about superheroes and supervillains that Hollywood keeps producing for some reason, even though it is more and more often possible to see nearly the same thing on the news. As a result, one of them got puffed up almost to the size of the creature that Superman died fighting, and the other couldn’t control the flames bursting from his mouth. He burned half of the shopping centre with customers, retail workers, and guards. With teenagers in the bowling alley on the second floor and children in the playroom on the first.    

Santana… wouldn’t have approved.

Both problems eliminated, they leave: the firefighters and the cops will take it from here. Flag’s spec ops stay behind, because officially it is their victory; the general public shouldn’t know about the existence of Task Force X. Through backyards, they retreat in the direction of the abandoned construction site on the other side of the street; a car has been sent to pick them up there.  

There is a workers’ trailer still standing by the construction pit. The door is not locked, and Rick, Deadshot, Croc, and Boomerang go inside. Jones’s arm is broken: his inhuman strength notwithstanding, he still was no match for his enemy – not the fire-breather, but the other one. Tatsu leaves them to figure out how to make a temporary sling, and wanders away. Not far from the trailer, a piece of tarpaulin stretched over the fence has come off, and she can see the building across the street. Tatsu sits down on the ground, puts her arms around her knees, and stares at the dandelions growing by the fence.  

In her head, flames are raging.

She doesn’t look up, neither when she hears the footsteps approaching, nor when Harkness – and it is him, no one else in the Squad reeks of the mixture of booze and cologne like that – sits down next to her and cracks open a can of beer.  

“You want some?” he nudges her. What extraordinary generosity. It is, however, perfectly possible that if she says yes, he’ll reply along the lines of “Well, then go and buy yourself some.”  

“No,” Tatsu replies without looking and, after a short pause, adds, “Thank you.”

“Are you sure?”

With a sigh, she accepts the can from his hands, and takes a sip.

“This is disgusting,” she whispers, and takes another.  

Harkness just snorts and opens another one. For a little while, they sit side by side in silence, drinking each from their own can, and study the wall opposite through the mesh of the fence – like out of a prison window. Old advertisements that are half torn off, graffiti, a writing proclaiming that life fucks us all – plenty of things to stare at to avoid looking the person next to you in the eye.  

“So what the hell happened to ya?” Boomerang asks, and suddenly she could do with some serum for invisibility or, better yet, disappearing completely. Naturally, it is a fleeting impulse; she has no right to disappear. She has obligations – towards Flag, towards Waller. Towards herself.    

“Nothing.”

“Nothing? You zoned out, Flag shouted himself hoarse before you heard him. Like you were someplace else. Didn’t ya?”  

Why do you need to know? Tatsu thinks. If she almost rushed headlong into the fire, it’s her own business. If it only seemed to her that someone was there, it’s her own business. If she’s going to see things that aren’t there for the rest of her life, it’s her own business. He shouldn't have spoken. There is something comforting about being silent together.    

“Nah, you don’t have to say if you don’t wanna,” Boomerang assents, and takes another pull on his can. “I just thought that you, well. Might wanna talk to someone.”  

And they fall silent again. Yet now Tatsu feels awkward, which makes her angry at herself. She’s not obliged to pour out her heart to anyone who shows something that looks like care.    

This silence doesn’t make it any easier.

“I have… bad memories,” she finally says. Now it won’t be as awkward: she answered his question. It won’t be, right? “About a fire”.

Harkness nods, looking at her attentively.

“Someone you knew died, aye?”

“My children,” she hears herself say, and wishes to disappear again.

“Fuck,” Boomerang says, embarrassed, and – unbelievable – looks like he actually feels bad about starting this conversation. “I’m sorry, I… well, uh, I had no idea.”  

“It’s okay,” Tatsu says mechanically. Nothing is okay: she can still see Yuki’s tear-stained face, still hear Reiko’s voice, she is still watching the flames run up the curtains that she and Maseo picked together, she is still breathing in the smoke and still cannot believe she deserves a gulp of fresh air. She should have saved them. All of them.  

Boomerang looks at her incredulously but doesn’t say anything, and bit by bit, the silence that she doesn’t want to run from returns – the kind of silence in which one is not alone.    

Then there are footsteps again, and Flag approaches them.

“There you are,” he says with relief as soon as he sees her. Rick does not let himself overstep the limits of formality – they’re on a mission, after all – but he has obviously been worried. At the sight of Harkness, he frowns warily. “You! Quit getting on her nerves.”

“Who’s gettin’ on her nerves, Colonel? I was just tryin’ to help,” Harkness protests. It appears Rick’s words have wounded him a little.  

“He was,” Tatsu says. “It’s all under control, Colonel Flag.”  

Flag shifts his gaze to her and then to Boomerang again, and nods.

“Okay. In any case… follow me. We’re leaving.”

Tatsu gives her unfinished beer to Boomerang.

“Don’t talk about this to anyone,” she tells him. This might be an order or a request; she doesn’t really know.

He nods, and she thinks absentmindedly: who would have thought this man knows how to make a solemn face.

“Thank you,” she says again, hoping that he understands that this is not just about the beer or his promise to keep his mouth shut.

***

 After a few days, Tatsu comes to visit him. In prison.

Actually, she comes to visit all of them, of course. Not more than fifteen minutes alone with each of them – Waller wouldn’t allow more. This request seems to have surprised her, but Tatsu is certain that Waller is already picturing the new threads she can use to manipulate her special operations puppets. So it is possible that one day this decision will blow up in Tatsu’s face – or in the faces of all of them. But she cannot shake off the feeling that she must do this – so that someone except Rick, who is already dealing with a lot these days, would notice in time if the inmates are treated with undeserved cruelty. So that she knows what’s on their minds, because it is safer to fight side by side with the people whose line of thought she can understand at least roughly. So that there is some kind of variety in their lives between the missions.  

This is why she visits all three of them. Killer Croc, who looks like he’s not surprised to see her in the slightest and doesn’t really seems to care that she came, but doesn’t have any issue with that either. Deadshot, who looks like he is surprised, but doesn’t seem to mind answering her questions when she notices a stack of letters in the corner and asks him how his daughter is doing. And Captain Boomerang, who, when she enters his cell, looks like he can’t figure out if he’s dreaming.

“Katana?” he frowns perplexedly. He’s stripped to his waist, so she can see a couple of fresh scars he brought back from the last mission, and he’s got a black eye – when Tatsu saw him last, he had not. Must have quarrelled with the guards again. “What are you doing here?”  

“I came to see you.”

For a moment he seems not to understand what she just said. Then he breaks into a smile – or rather a grin, wide and pleased. Very pleased.  

“Aha! Knew it would end up like this,” he pronounces in triumph.

“Like this?”

“You,” he looks like he’s just proven a theorem of immense complexity, “missed me.”  

“I haven’t missed you, Captain.”

A very, very pleased grin.

“And still you’re here.”

“I visited Deadshot and Killer Croc earlier,” Tatsu says, and sees his facial expression change instantly. Not for long: the grin is quick to return, and she wouldn’t be able to tell right away that he’s disappointed.    

“Did ya now? And how are our fellas doing? Better than me, I reckon?”

“So it would seem. Did you fight the guards?”

“Why do you care, gorgeous?”

Indeed, why does she? Most likely, he picked a fight himself – and got his just deserts.  

“Make up your mind,” Tatsu says, “if you think that I missed you or that I don’t care.”

Harkness chuckles and really seems to ponder over this for a while.

“Beats me,” he concludes at last. “Care to throw some light on it?”  

No, Tatsu thinks, I don’t get it myself and I’m not sure I want to.

Instead of answering, she comes closer to him – so close that she can smell his sweat – and studies his face. She has to look up to be able to do that, which must look comical. Then again, he’s hardly stupid enough to laugh at her height or anything else about her, especially when she’s armed and he is not.  

“You lost a tooth. What happened?”

“Didn’t get along with one of the Wall’s watchdogs.”

“You could have tried not to look for trouble for a change,” all of a sudden, Tatsu realizes that she’s mad. Really mad at him. They might get dragged to another mission this instant; whether they like it or not, they have to be in good enough shape to protect the society that the most of them have to atone before at least partially. They shouldn’t spend their energy and health on nonsense. Black eyes and knocked-out teeth are nothing, but it mustn’t come to any of them being out of action when all of them are needed. All their powers, all their skills. All the anger they should rather aim at something other than the people who can just press a certain button at any point – and dispose of the wilful weapon.

Boomerang bares his teeth – not like Croc, of course, but still threateningly. He looks dangerous now – big, sturdy, more than a head taller than her. But he still isn’t more dangerous than her – and both of them are aware of that.  

“And they could have tried,” he speaks through his teeth, “not to talk shit about my mother for a change. They wanna talk shit about me, they can knock themselves out. I’ve heard enough ‘bout myself, I don’t give a flying fuck about what else they gonna say. But they’d better leave my mother out of it.”

So that’s what it is. They have found a quick and easy way to infuriate the man who has “MUM” tattooed on his chest. In uneven letters, like a child's handwriting. Tatsu noticed that tattoo as soon as she came in but didn’t look too closely at it. Now she feels like she has the right to look, to let her gaze slip lower, at the ridiculous writing that heaves with each furious breath of his, and then to avert her eyes at once.    

“They have power, and you have nothing,” she says. “Do you enjoy being their plaything?”

“Oh, so I’m a plaything, darl? And do I have much choice who to be now? In these four walls, and,” Boomerang points at his neck, at the place where a bomb is implanted under his skin, “with this crap in my neck?”  

Tatsu looks up again, right him in the eye.

“You already know who you are,” she tells him. “You’re a weapon. Broken weapons get discarded. And you’re letting them break you.”  

He stays silent, just looks at her in an odd manner, as if she’s speaking another language but he has a vague understanding of what she’s saying and doesn’t like what he just heard – because it is the truth.

Tatsu still doesn’t understand why she cares, and with each passing minute she has less and less desire to learn why.  

“Also,” she continues, “if you call me ‘darl’ or ‘gorgeous’ one more time, you’re going to regret opening your mouth.”

“Yeah? And how should I call ya?”

“Katana.”

“What, and that’s all? Nah, we might be weapons,” and she probably ought to remind him that there is no ‘we’, but in this particular case he’s right. Perhaps that is why Tatsu feels drawn to all of them: they’re cut from the same cloth, “but we’re alive as well. So far. Seriously, what’s yer real name? You know mine.”  

“I should not disclose that.”  

“Oh, come on. Listen,” he breaks into a pleased grin again. Another theorem proven. “How about a deal? You tell me yer name, and I will try to keep my temper if anyone else decides to stir me up. What do ya think?”    

“As if you’re going to keep your word.”

Boomerang makes a show of putting his hand over his heart.

“For you, ma’am… anything.”

For you. All at once, she recalls Rick’s words: do whatever you want to him. How many minutes of the visit she has already spent on this predictably fruitless conversation?    

“My name is Tatsu Yamashiro,” she says, tired, and then he smiles – not the way he did before, but in a calmer and more sincere manner. Gratefully.

“George Harkness,” he offers her his hand with an earnest air. “Nice to meet ya.”  

Tatsu hesitantly offers him hers. Her hand looks very small and fragile against his huge paw, and he must be thinking the same because the handshake comes out very careful. He could easily break her wrist. She could easily kill him with one hand afterwards. But he holds her hand gently in his warm, pleasantly calloused palm, and Tatsu hastens to take her hand away, because this is a mistake of an even worse kind than the time he saw her without the mask.  

“So you promise not to fights the guards.”

“I promise to try,” Harkness assures, but he’s keeping one hand behind his back.

“Don’t cross your fingers,” Tatsu says sternly. Real mature.

With a sigh, Boomerang repeats his promise, this time holding his hands within her view.

“But I ain’t promisin’ not to call you gorgeous,” he declares in the end.

“You know my name now.”

“But you’re still gorgeous.”

“Time’s up!” shouts the guard outside the door, and Tatsu cannot help feeling relieved that she has to go. She doesn’t regret visiting him, but all of this is too strange and awkward, and both of them might be weapons, but her position is different from his, and it is better not to forget that.    

“Can I do anything for you?” she asks him on parting.  

“Well,” Boomerang smirks. “I don’t even know where to begin.”

“With something I would actually agree to do?”

“Come again. Will ya?” This time he isn’t flirting; this time she can feel his insecurity, even shyness. As if he doesn’t like to admit to himself that what she answers is really important to him.  

“I’ll try,” she says cautiously. She’s not going to make any promises: she asked Waller about one time only. She doubts if she’ll be allowed to visit them again – to visit him again.  

“Try,” Harkness repeats, as if weighing the word on his tongue. “This means no.”

“This means I’ll try,” Tatsu says firmly.

And she comes again in a week. And the week after next. And a week after that.  

 ***

 “Why didn’t you walk away in Midway City?” Tatsu asks him once. “When Rick broke the control panel. You left then; why did you return?”  

A lot of water has flowed under the bridge since the time Captain Boomerang dared to smart off Amanda Waller. Several successful missions, slightly more respectful attitude on his part – and his cell already bears a passing resemblance to a place for living, even if for living quite miserably. Now there is even a table, and a chair that she gets to sit on as guest privilege. Harkness is sitting on the floor opposite her. The question seems to catch him unawares, but only for a moment.    

“Huh? Why did I return? Gotta live up to my name, that’s why. Have you ever thrown a boomerang, luv?”

I’m going to throw you somewhere one day, Tatsu thinks, yet without much irritation.

“And jokes aside?”

Boomerang attempts to feign an offended sigh.

“How do ya think? Plenty of options, all right. You gonna try to guess which one?”

Tatsu frowns.

“Is this a psychoanalysis session? Were you bitten by Harley Quinn?”

“Nah, Blondie didn’t bite me, I would’ve remembered. So don’t be jealous,” his voice gets playful again, and Tatsu stifles the urge to roll her eyes. “Lookie here… suppose I suddenly realized that I can’t leave you guys! ‘Cause you’re my mates. One for all, and so on. Don’t believe me?”

“You said something about plenty of options. What are the rest of them?”

He scratches his chin thoughtfully.

“We-e-ell… the second, ‘course, is that I wanted to save the world. Not that the world smiles upon me every bloody day, but I still wanna live! And for everyone an’ their mother to know that the bastards like us can also be heroes. Don’t you like being one of the good guys, eh, Tatsu?”

“I’m not ‘one of the good guys’”, Tatsu protests. “And it’s not me that we’re talking about. Any other options?”

“There was no point in leaving. That was still gonna be the end of the world, aye? So I’d rather meet it in battle and in good company than on the run. All the same it’ll be the end. There you go.”  

He stops talking, and in the silence that falls Tatsu can hear the footsteps of the guards in the corridor. Once again she wonders what the duty attendants that monitor everything through the surveillance cameras think of their conversations. They must make for the strangest and most pointless reality show ever.  

“The third one,” she says.

Boomerang looks a bit disappointed.

“Why?”

“Not the first one, because none of us meant anything to you then. You had just met us. And it didn’t seem like you were upset about letting Slipknot down,” Tatsu explains. She doesn’t intend to offend him – she’s just saying the truth. Once, he claimed it himself that they understand each other – here’s some understanding, he’s welcome. “Not the second one either, because you’re not stupid – no, stop smiling. You never believed that if people like us stop the Enchantress, someone would learn about that. Only the third option remains.”  

Harkness nods slowly.

“Yeah,” he agrees, and his eyes turn pensive, abstracted, as if he is there again, in the night city frozen in anticipation of the apocalypse. As if he sees himself – and makes a choice once again. “And that’s what happened in the end, didn’t it?”

“So the third option, then?”

“So it is.”

But something in his face makes Tatsu think that he was hoping for a different answer.

***

 Time flies; weeks and months go by. Tatsu spends them fighting, spilling someone else’s blood, occasionally drinking with Flag at a bar or in his apartment – a bachelor’s home again; reading books – most of the plots seem too naïve and unimaginative compared to what goes on in her life, and that is even for the best, and visiting the members of the Suicide Squad in Belle Reve. Some people go clubbing Friday evenings, and she goes to prison Friday afternoons.  

“Don’t get attached to them,” Rick scolds her.

“That is rich coming from you,” Tatsu replies, and he has enough self-awareness not to argue. Lest he gets offended, she chooses not to tell him that sometimes she and Lawton talk a little about him good-naturedly behind his back.

During one of her visits, Harkness raises a topic she has totally forgotten about.

“Hey, come to think of it, we never had that drink,” he points out. Tatsu doesn’t understand what he’s talking about, and it must be written all over her face, because he continues. “Remember I asked you out for a drink? In Midway City, before we fought the witch.”  

Tatsu has to make an effort to remember: indeed, he said something of the sort, but it never occurred to her to take those words seriously.

“We had a drink,” she counters. “When… when you shared your beer with me.”  

He shakes his head, dissatisfied.

“At the construction site? That’s bollocks. I’m talking a proper bar… nah, a restaurant! With crystal glasses an’ candles an’ shit… Like normal people.”  

“Candles,” Tatsu mumbles. She tries to imagine the two of them at the table at a restaurant; the picture turns out pretty absurd. On the other hand, a lot of what has happened in her life during the past few years can be deemed absurd.

“Yeah. Candles,” echoes Harkness, and continues with a crooked smile, “well, that’s me jokin’ around. In the near future,” he gestures in the direction of the small barred window of his cell, “I won’t be able to take you even to a fucking McDonald’s.”  

They don’t talk about the hypothetical dinners at a restaurant anymore, but the absurd picture stays with Tatsu, who still feels somehow indebted to Boomerang – for no reason, as she keeps telling herself – for that conversation at the construction site. She doesn’t like to feel the weight of unpaid debts on her shoulders – yes, that’s what it is about.

One day, she finds a way to pay that debt back.

 ***

 She waits for him in the car outside the prison gate. She hears him first; she cannot make out what exactly he is yelling at the guards, but that surely isn’t ‘good evening’. Then the door of the jeep is open, and someone must have kicked him in the rear because he literally falls into the car. Tatsu shrinks back on instinct.  

Then Harkness looks up – and notices her.

“Katana?.. Hey, what the hell’s going on? They didn’t let me take the boomerangs, didn’t let me take anything…”

“Close the door,” Tatsu tells him, and when he, still confused, obeys, tells the driver, “Let’s go.”

The car pulls away.

“I still don’t get what’s happening,” Harkness reminds her. “Sure, I’m happy to see ya, but… you weren’t ordered to take me to the woods and finish me off under the radar, huh?”  

“If Waller wanted to get rid of you, she would have had you killed in your own cell, and that’s all.”

“Wow, thanks for honesty. So where are we going?”

“To a restaurant,” Tatsu says, and turns away. Yet again it crosses her mind that it is a terrible idea.

“A restaurant?” Harkness drawls quizzically.

“As far as I recall, you said that the beer at the construction site is ‘bollocks’.”  

She should turn back to him, of course. The problem is that Tatsu is ninety-nine per cent sure that if she meets his eye now, she will blush. And she is by no means going to give him any sign that might be interpreted as taking an interest… of a certain kind. She has already blundered more than a few times.  

Therefore she stubbornly keeps looking out of the window. Then again, she doesn’t even need to look to picture how his facial expression is changing now; she’s seen this rakish grin enough times.  

“Holy cow. Tatsu, are you serious? We’re really just going to a restaurant? We’re getting outta this shithole where they only give us porridge with rat crap to gorge ourselves on lobsters and drink wine? Oh, fuck me sideways,” in the end, she turns to him and sees him throw back his head and burst into laughter, narrowing his eyes happily. “I’ll be damned! Am I dreaming? I must be dreaming. Pinch me.”    

“I can assure you you’re not,” Tatsu says, and realizes that she is also starting to smile despite herself. She has visited him and the others in Belle Reve often enough to know that porridge with rat crap, unfortunately, is far from being just a figure of speech. After such a diet, a meal at a restaurant must seem like the pinnacle of happiness.    

Boomerang shakes his head, apparently still unable to believe her.

“Holy fucking shit. How did you do that? How do you even do all that? I’ve told ya you’re unreal, have I?”

“Yes, you have,” Tatsu confirms patiently. And more than once – too often for her to attach great importance to it, too fervently for it not to please her at all. “Let’s put it that way: this is Waller paying me for a… favour.”  

“A favour, then. I take it a lot of some poor suckers died?”

“No,” she shakes her head. And it is true – but there still was a lot of blood. Both the man Waller indicated and his bodyguards turned out to be worthy adversaries. The whole thing went not as smoothly as she wanted it to – not that she wanted to; not that she would kill another person she knows nothing about if she could help it. Nothing to assure her: this one deserves it. Everything turned out rather… nasty. She had to burn the bodies. Then she got home in a haze, tended to a couple of fresh wounds – or rather, just scratches. And then she went to the bathroom and spent a long time soaping herself, as if the invisible filth that bothered her the most could be washed off with shower gel.    

Afterwards, she rummaged through her modest wardrobe and dug out the only dress she has about in America. Nothing special: wine red, below the knee length, sleeveless but with a pretty high neckline – very demure. The first and so far the last dress she bought after… after. If she and Rick didn’t have to accompany Amanda Waller to some event once, she wouldn’t have bought this one either. She put it on, combed her hair, still wet after the shower, with her fingers, looked at herself in the mirror – and flew into a rage, pulled off the dress, and could barely stop herself from tearing it to shreds. Restaurant or not, what does it matter? The last thing she needs is for him to think she dressed up for him.      

So the situation might be a little less absurd than it could have been. Both of them look like they’re going on another mission with the others, only she isn’t wearing her mask – he has already seen her face anyway – and he isn’t wearing his ever-present coat. It is no wonder he wasn’t allowed to take it – Waller wasn’t going to let him out of Belle Reve armed, and to let him wear his coat would probably be as unwise as to hand him all his boomerangs. Tatsu has no doubt that everyone and their dog have already searched through the personal belongings of the Squad, but she wouldn’t be surprised to learn that somewhere in his inside pockets Harkness has as many boomerangs as he is listed as having officially. She witnessed this man produce from his bosom at least four different lighters, a massive stack of dollars, a pocket knife, small binoculars, flat-nose pliers, and a toy unicorn. She has to admit: sometimes she doesn’t understand how he even does all that either.    

It appears that the thoughts of Captain Boomerang also turn to the contents of his pockets.

“Hey, how the hell are we affording this, though? Make no mistake, I’d stand treat, but my stash is in the coat, and these assholes didn’t let me take it, y’know.”    

“Don’t worry about that. Waller is paying for everything,” she explains, unable to suppress a grin, because this part, possibly the most unbelievable part of the entire affair, gives her a sort of silly, spiteful joy. Task Force X is a comparatively recent project, but they’ve already cleaned up so much mess for Amanda Waller that Heracles and his labours don’t even come close. A dinner at a restaurant is the least thing she could offer them. So when Boomerang explodes with laughter and gives her a conspiratorial wink, she looks him right in the eye and smiles. Another mistake. Then again, this is not the first time they share a secret.

He puts his hand on her knee, and she shakes it off immediately; this is way too far.

“I see you took your sword with ya,” Harkness observes, not giving any sign that something didn’t go the way he wanted.

“I am to keep an eye on you.”

“Yeah. How about…” he leans in closer, and the smell of cologne blasts up Tatsu’s nose. She can only hope it is due to external use only, “we chop off his head,” he nods at the driver, “and drive the fuck away from this? Huh?”    

The driver, who can definitely hear everything, doesn’t turn, but Tatsu notices him tense up.

“You’re kidding,” she says dryly. He may be, or he may be not – with Digger Harkness, one cannot always tell.

“Why kidding, doll? Zip, and done. There’s no way you enjoy working for Waller.”  

“I do not. But if you pull some stunt,” Tatsu feels for the sword hilt, and Boomerang sees that – very well, it is good for him to see that, “I will chop your head off. I really hope it won’t come to that.”  

“And what’s it to you? Scared of me? But I’m unarmed,” he claps himself on the chest demonstratively, implying that he has no weapons on him. “Why do you care if it does?”  

“I just wouldn’t like to do that,” she says firmly, and it’s true. It works well; he doesn’t even mention running away for the remainder of the day.

 This might be the strangest evening in her life.

Waller’s man drives them to a French restaurant whose name she cannot read but is almost sure that the phrase was chosen solely because it sounds impressive. They are let in through the back door, so no one among the other guests, who are sporting evening dresses and suits, pays any attention to her crop top and sword or to his… appearance in general. Their table is one of those located in alcoves, away from prying eyes, but Tatsu feels they are being watched. Which means Waller doesn’t trust her too much – well, she can understand that. She is part of a special team composed of deranged madmen, and she must admit she likes these deranged madmen more than she likes certain normal people known to her. Of course, she is Flag’s right-hand woman, but it is most likely that Waller doesn’t trust Flag either. It is doubtful whether there are any people in this world that she trusts at all.          

Waller is rich. Their little feast will not shatter her wealth, all the more so since the restaurant she sent them to is not the most luxurious. But they still have a field day ordering loads of food and a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu.    

“To honour among thieves?” she suggests, when they raise their glasses for the first time.

“Didn’t ya say yer not a thief?”

“That is true,” she admits, and adds inwardly, I’m a killer.  

In the end, they drink to the Suicide Squad. Then to Lawton and Jones, currently languishing in their cells. Then to Zoe Lawton, who is acting in a school play next week. To a lot of things. He asks her about her life here, in America. At some point she finds herself trying to explain to him what taiyaki is, and him telling her about banana sandwiches, and she can’t remember why they started talking about this at all. The bottle becomes empty, and another appears as if by itself.      

They don’t talk about the past. They don’t talk about the future, because there might be no future at all – they can’t know for sure, what with their way of life. That evening, Tatsu laughs and thinks: good thing I’m drunk – it almost gets easier for a while.  

When it’s time to leave, Harkness gets pig-headed.

“Whoa, no, no, no. Already? It’s too early, are you kiddin’ me?” he booms out when they exit the restaurant. He protests, but she drags him by the hand and he stumbles along after all, treading heavily like a dancing bear. “Let’s go someplace else, luv. Look at the pretty stars.”  

“We are already late. And you… you have to go back to jail,” Tatsu tells him. The stars are pretty indeed, but she regrets looking up at them, because her head begins to spin. Thankfully, she isn’t wearing high heels. Thankfully, she doesn’t have any high-heeled shoes at all, or she could have been possessed to wear them. “Sorry,” she adds when they get into the car and set off. “There is no other way.”  

“Back to jail,” Boomerang repeats with disgust. Sprawling on the seat, he unzips his hoodie, and Tatsu is swept over by the smell of cologne again. Weirdly, it doesn’t annoy her as much as at the beginning of the evening. “I’m a fucking Cinderella. I’m not back by midnight, they turn me into a pumpkin.”  

“Cinderella,” Tatsu echoes, and giggles: everything is way funnier now. The driver makes a sudden turn, and she is literally thrown at Boomerang. Her cheek presses to his chest – and stays there. Tatsu feels drunk and sated and drunk again, and sleepy too, and he makes for a decent pillow, and she can’t make herself move away.  

“Oh, you think it’s funny,” Harkness mutters with mock offence in his voice. It seems he’s about to fall asleep too. “Well, go on, laugh.”

They drive back in silence, and through the drowse Tatsu feels the warm arm around her waist and thinks: good thing I’m drunk, I can pretend I’m asleep.  

The road to Belle Reve is long, but it still feels like they reach it too quickly.

“Inmate,” calls one of the guards, “get out.”  

Harkness, his eyes still closed, moans with discontent.

“Captain Boomerang,” Tatsu says softly, freeing herself from his embrace. “It’s time.”

There is nothing to be done. He’s already about to step out of the jeep, when he suddenly moves closer to her again.

“Hey, darlin’,” he says, looking her right in the eye. “Aren’t ya forgetting something?”

It takes her some time to realize what he means: he must be expecting her to kiss him. All at once she remembers everything that has happened this evening, and awful shame washes over her: it is no wonder he’s expecting that to happen.  

“Inmate, get out!”

She shrinks back.

“Good night, Captain,” she tells him as dryly as she can. He looks wounded but says nothing, and almost obediently lets the guards escort him back to his cell. Tatsu closes her eyes and rubs her temples wearily. Tomorrow she is going to regret drinking so much. She already does – and that’s not the only thing she regrets.

She has to stop seeing him.

 ***

 At first, she even succeeds. Next Friday Tatsu, as always, goes to Belle Reve to see the Squad – all of them save for Harkness. She feels sick at heart because if she did promise him anything, it was to visit him, and now she’s going back on her word because of her own stupid weakness. But there is no other way.  

“He asked about you,” Waylon tells her a week later, when she brings him the latest issue of Playboy. Tatsu almost doesn’t feel weird anymore when buying it, and doesn’t try to imagine anymore what the news stand clerks think when she pays them for it. Such periodicals cause her a feeling of light disgust, but Croc, who gets let out of jail only to be thrown into another trouble spot, deserves at least some small joys.  

“Who?”

Waylon, no doubt observant like all the quiet ones tend to be, bares his impressive teeth.  

“You know who.”

It seems a logical solution to give up on these visits at all – but in that case she would betray all of them. Perhaps this little tradition is much more important to her than it is to the prisoners, but Tatsu is almost sure that it means something to them as well. She has no right to deprive the rest of them of this bit of understanding, companionship, normalcy because she wasn’t smart enough to stop the game she and Boomerang started before it became too late.

At home – not that the apartment she’s renting here deserves to be called ‘home’ – she, unable to fall asleep, unsheathes the sword and runs the tips of her fingers along the cool blade. A tender, habitual movement – like touching the cheek of a loved one.

“I’ve lost my way, Maseo,” whispers Tatsu. The place where the souls of the people struck down by this blade are trapped is still a mystery to her, but she knows that Maseo will come as soon as she calls him – as a voice from afar, as nebulous shapes in the swirls of smoke, as the peace and safety granted by the presence of someone dear. “I’m afraid of my own heart.”    

I know your heart, Tatsu. You have nothing to be afraid of.

“It makes me act rashly. Makes me succumb to false feelings.”  

I know your heart, Tatsu, and it incapable of falsehood.  

Only the ones that are already far away can speak so vaguely and with such unrelenting honesty at the same time.  

“I will always love you,” she whispers ardently. Not because she doesn’t want him to think it is not so; not because she herself feels like it is not so anymore either. She knows for sure that she is always going to love him, for she loved him as a lover, as a husband, as the father of her children, as the only thing she had left after all her life fell apart, burned in that damned fire. He will stay in her heart until her last breath – even if she has to close her heart to the rest of the world. Once she used to think that after all she’s been through, it isn’t going to be an issue.

And I will always love you, her husband replies, and Tatsu blinks back tears with a deep sigh.

“I just wish you were alive,” she tells him for what must be the hundredth, or maybe a thousandth time.

If he was with her – not as smoke or a voice, but as flesh and blood – he probably would have kissed her gently on the nape of her neck, as he often used to do.  

I just wish, says her husband – no, the soul of her husband, which is already rushing away, deep into the world she shouldn’t hurry to go to if she doesn’t want this sword to fall into wrong hands, that you were happy.

***

 Literally the next day there is a message from Metropolis that some giant snake-like beast is terrorizing the city and devouring people. The monster was last seen crawling into the building of the opera – which is where their squad heads to after reaching the city.  

“Look at that freak,” Harkness comments in a low voice. The creature is curled up slumbering on stage, and they are watching it from the catwalks above. “Not a family of yours by any chance, eh, ‘gator?’    

Waylon steps towards him, and the planks creak under his feet, threatening to break.

“Say that again,” he growls.

Tatsu bares her sword and wedges herself between them. Waylon backs off reluctantly.

“Knock it off,” she tells Boomerang. It feels like everything has come full circle – the day Harkness picked up her mask, he also had a run-in with Jones. The day they were sent to fight the Enchantress, she also put the blade of her sword under his chin. Why did she even think something would change?

“Oh, so you’re talking to me after all?”

“Enough,” Tatsu hisses. She really wants to try to explain everything to him. Maybe if she tries to put her feelings into words, many things will become clear to her, too. But if he thinks they are going to discuss this now, he is mistaken.

On the neighbouring catwalk, Rick is looking at them in a rage, gesturing both of them to shut up. Harkness steps closer; now the blade of the Soultaker is within a hair’s breadth away from his neck. A single careless movement, and blood will be spilled. A wild idea crosses her mind: it looks as if he’s into this. Tatsu licks her lips.

“Y’know,” Boomerang begins, lowering his head a little so that it is easier for him to look her in the eye, “I think you’re scared of me. Or of yourself, hell if I know. Am I right?”  

A loud rustle comes from beneath, and the next instant the monster bites through the middle of the catwalk they’re standing on, and both of them are falling down. Tatsu manages to grab some rope, but when she tries to climb it, her hands slip, and she comes tumbling down.

The fall is far from being soft, even though she falls on the tatters of the curtain, which the snake must have torn earlier. She is lucky not to hurt her head, but her left leg and hip are aching. Only the awareness that there is no time to lie around makes her summon up all her strength and get up. Her sword is nowhere to be seen, and Tatsu is overwhelmed by fury: now she is useless.

The snake roars and shakes its head, trying to shake off Croc, who is trying to bite through its scales. Rick is shooting at the monster from above, and Deadshot, who is already on stage somehow, is doing the same from below, dodging the blows of its tail. Tatsu sweeps her eyes weakly over the stage and suddenly notices a hole broken in it. At the very edge of the hole, the hilt of her sword is sticking out of the floor. Moving as quickly as it is possible to do that with a limp, Tatsu hurries there.

The moment she pulls the sword out of the stage, Harkness’s head pokes out of the hole. Not waiting for him to ask for help, Tatsu helps him get out.

“Are you…” both of them begin in unison and drop it immediately, because the snake has managed to shake off the bothersome little crocodile – who is hopefully just somewhere on the floor and not in its belly – and is moving towards them, slower than before but still pretty speedily. They scatter, and Tatsu charges at the monster with her sword drawn. Harkness throws a boomerang at the creature, aiming at its eye, but it dodges at the last second.        

Eventually, with joint forces they manage to kill the beast. To be on the safe side, Lawton fires a round into its open jaws. The long body shudders one last time and falls still. For some time, the five of them stand there looking at it.

“Where could this thing even come from?” Rick mutters.

“Remember what the Wicked Witch of the West said when she tried to get us to join her? The world is changing, the time of magic has come, blah, blah, blah,” Lawton reminds him. Rick nods absentmindedly; these are not happy memories.

Jones kicks the dead snake.

“Maybe it meant no harm,” he points out in his deep voice.

“Croc,” Rick says wearily, “it ate people.”

“So did I.”

“But at least you didn’t chew the curtain at the opera like a disgraced diva?” Lawton asks, struggling not to grin.

“Nuh-uh.”

“Well, then it’s okay.”

Rick titters nervously, and the next instant all of them are shaking with laughter.

 Tatsu is drinking water straight from the tap in the restroom, when Harkness comes in.

“This is a ladies’ room,” she says reflexively.

“Hey, I just wanna wash my face, is all.”

Without waiting for her to answer, he comes closer and starts washing at the neighbouring sink. Tatsu casts a sidelong look at him and notices that the water is turning red.  

“Show me your face,” she orders.

“It’s not a bad face, what’s yer problem?”

“I’m serious.”

He rolls his eyes, but stands still while she examines his face, only wincing when she dabs at the cut on his forehead with a paper towel.

“Just a scratch,” he assures at once.

“Just a scratch,” Tatsu agrees. She scrunches up the towel and throws it into the sink. She would like to keep her hand on his face, pretending that she’s still wiping off the blood, but she’s done pretending.

“How about you?” Boomerang asks quietly.

“Fine. A couple of bruises. You were lucky today,” she says just as quietly, and takes off her mask. Tomorrow they might not be as lucky. “I’m happy for you.”

“And I’m happy you got out alive… darl.”

For a moment she wants him to ruin everything. To reply with a jibe, to crack another dirty joke, to try to grab and kiss her only to get smacked. Not to stand motionless in front of her like he’s afraid to scare her off. It occurred to her once that from the outside their relationship might look like an attempt to tame a wild animal. Perhaps this is a mutual process.

Do whatever you want to him.

She stands up on tiptoes and kisses him.

For an instant, Harkness freezes – possibly trying to figure out again if he’s dreaming – and then pulls her closer and kisses back. Drinks her hungrily, like this is both the first time and the last. Bearing in mind what their lives are like, it really might be the last.

Tatsu doesn’t immediately realize why she suddenly doesn’t need to stand on tiptoes anymore.

“Put me down–” she starts, but gives up and wraps her legs around his waist. Boomerang grunts with satisfaction and switches from her lips to her neck. His beard, fortunately, is softer than could have been expected.  

“Stop drinking so much,” Tatsu breathes out, now that no one is trying to shut her mouth. “You taste like…” all English words slip her mind, “like… a beer cask.”  

It tickles her when he laughs into her neck.

Someone simply must enter now – Rick, Floyd, Amanda Waller, the president of the United  States, but no, no one is trying to stop him from squeezing her hips, to stop her from running her fingers through his hair. Weapon to weapon, blade to blade. Red-hot metal to red-hot metal. Melting until something new is forged – without fear, without regret, without the past, without the future.

Clearly, Maseo wants too much: she remembers what happiness is, and she is sure she’ll never ever be happy again.

But she can take a shot at being alive.