#drives me batty

[thatdiabolicalfeminist]

One thing that really pisses me off is the people who ONLY bring up collective action of any kind to try to shut down anyone suggesting that people do literally anything to try to improve a systemic problem. (Except maybe voting. A lot of these types love to talk about how voting is the only thing you can really do.)

Like over half of the times I've seen this "well actually, individual actions don't make much difference" phenomenon, it's been in response to calls FOR collective action, calls TO organize, or to join and support existing mass movements.

(I've literally seen people call it "Americanized individualism" for an existing activist movement to ask people in general to take part in an organized boycott!)

The whole point of collective action is that a lot of individuals pulling in the same direction, and encouraging others to join in and help out, can make a big difference.

The whole point is to direct your efforts to areas where you can get a whole lot of other people pulling the same direction as you!!

It's not "well I'm not literally 20000 people so I guess I can't do anything at all!!

(and if you try to do anything (or worse, ask me to do anything), you must just not understand about collective action 😌)"

[xx-thedarklord-xx]

“X wasn’t supposed to be likeable—” and who made them the character police?

"x wasn't really a likeable character but they weren't supposed to be likeable-" I liked them. in fact, your honour, I'm a bit in love with them.

[alchemistc]

There's been something about the woobification of Buck that's been sitting on the tip of my tongue for weeks now, and I think I've finally figured it out.

This is, of course, mostly in reference to the moral outrage about a decade-ish (give or take) age gap between two adult men and the infantalization of one said grown man, so all the puritanism isn't really coming from a place of good faith anyway, but here's the thing that's been bugging me that I couldn't quite put a finger on until now.

Buck has people he goes to for certain things. He has, what are in his mind, experts in the field for most of the things he can't think through on his own, that he goes to for a sounding board.

He went to Hen to talk through the sperm donor dilemma for a few reasons that made sense to him. 1) She's a mom. She has very much had to deal with the reality of 'giving up' children she considered her own. Buck is aware that he would be giving up something that could mean something to him, and he wants to talk to someone who has some insight into that. 2) She's dealt with IVF. She knows the risks, she knows the trials and tribulations, she knows about this thing that he is thinking about agreeing to be a part of so she's going to have a fuller grasp on the enormity of everything this process entails.

And they drink about it. Hen gives him what she can and cautions him where she thinks she should and they continue to talk about it and regardless of what SHE thinks, he makes his mind up in part because he got to talk to his Expert.

Bobby is often his go to when he feels like he's losing his grip on things. He's seen Bobby staring down the bottom of the bottle. He's seen the work he's done to pull himself back into the world, and he's seen the way he fights for his family, his people. Buck leans on him in times of questioning himself because he knows Bobby has pulled himself off the ledge with bleeding hands and a bleeding heart.

He reaches out to Maddie about interpersonal shit constantly. We see it all the way back in S2 when he's starting to question what the hell he's still doing in Abby's apartment, and that never really changes. She's the one with advice for him when he's angry with his parents, upset with the firefam, worried about his friends, or just generally concerned with the way he's perceived by people or how he perceives the world. He goes to her when he's embarrassed, ashamed, because he knows she won't judge him for it. She'll call him out, for sure, but she's not going to look at him differently when she knows he's done something he considers bad behavior.

When he goes to her during the Tommy arc, he's there for one reason he'll admit, and another she has to ferret out. 1) He lied to his best friend and he doesn't know why. 2) Oh yeah he went on a date with a dude that's not strange WHY IS THAT STRANGE I'VE ALWAYS BEEN AN ALLY PLEASE DON'T PULL BACK THE CURTAIN - and Maddie is there with two things: 1) It's not weird but it IS new and something you clearly haven't worked through all the way which is why 2) you'll tell Eddie when you're ready

And Eddie is sort of his go-to to bounce ideas off of. Eddie is his Buck expert. Eddie is the guy who can sort through all the bullshit and who sees Buck for exactly who he is, every time, regardless of what Buck himself is thinking. Eddie is his best friend, and he knows the good the bad and the ugly better than anyone else. He is also, quite frankly, the one Buck seeks out to help him contextualize all of his romantic feelings for people. Eddie's the guy he talks to when he's interested in someone, when he's falling for someone, he's the guy through which Buck filters his love interests into the firefam. I do the same shit with my best friend. It's instinct to want the person you consider the expert on you to meet the person you are interested in, it's instinct to want them to like each other, to get along. Buck knows Eddie loves him (in whatever way you see that love, Buck knows Eddie loves him) and he wants this person who loves him to be at least an active listener as he talks himself through the minefield of relationships. I do also think that up until the events of season seven, Buck considers Eddie sort of an expert on that traditional love-marriage-kids-white-picket-fence relationship Buck thinks he's striving for - in a very naive way, because obviously the wasn't what Eddie and Shannon had and Buck knows that, but he's probably fed some of Eddie's rose colored reminiscences back into that notion.

When he comes out to Eddie he's got two worries. 1) I lied to you and I figured out why but I'm still a little worried you think it's weird and 2) I screwed it up with someone I really like and I don't know where to go from here.

And Eddie (Buck expert) reassures him that just because it's new and unexpected doesn't make it strange, that it doesn't change anything in their friendship. And then he gets right to the heart of it - if you like him you should reach out and tell him that. He doesn't know you like we do but if you give him the chance to, he'll love you as much as we do. If he doesn't give it the same shot you want to he's the idiot.

With all that context in mind, Buck isn't seeking out Tommy's attention because he wants an authority figure, or someone to take care of him, someone to guide him through sex or love or relationship dynamics or any of the other random shit I've seen ppl infantalizing Buck about.

What he's looking for, and what he ultimately tells Tommy he'd like to pursue, is a partnership. Someone to walk (or more likely for Buck, speedrun) through experiences together. The Athena to his Bobby, the Chim to his Maddie, the Karen to his Hen.

So every time I see someone infantalizing Buck for seeking out a relationship with an older man for X or Y reason, I'm just like - no. He has Bobby, Hen, Maddie, Eddie, Chim etc for that. He doesn't want or need Tommy for that. He is a grown ass man who has built these strong relationships with his peers and his mentors and he is so fucking aware of that because he reaches for their help any time he feels the urge for a helping hand.

So yeah, Tommy's older. Yes, Tommy has more experience with his sexuality than Buck. And that - that's really it. Buck's been in the same career for more than half a decade. He's lived on his own since he was no older than 19/20. He's had serious relationships, he has a rich and fulfilling life. There is no power imbalance in the relationship between Buck and Tommy.

And while the age gap may be a bit of a draw for Buck, it's not WHY he's attracted to Tommy. We know because he's told Maddie. He's cool. He's interesting. He's confident. He has a cleft.

Buck isn't going into this waiting for someone older and more experienced to take the fucking reins. He felt like he clicked with Tommy, like there was an immediate connection, and yes, Tommy had to kiss him about it for Buck to actually figure out what it was he was experiencing, but from that point on it was all on Buck (and the people he leans on for advice) to help him sort through.

Tommy didn't do shit other than pump the brakes and try to give Buck the space he thought he needed to decide what he was ready for. Buck (again, with the help of his experts - Maddie for the emotional piece of it, Eddie for the Buck of it all) did the work on his own. Tommy didn't swoop in and overbearingly hold his hand through a sexual awakening. He kissed him, asked him out, realized he wasn't ready, stepped back and then checked in multiple times when Buck came back at it going 120 miles an hour.

And then he did everything he could to prove to Buck he wanted the same thing - a partner, someone to talk to, and lean on, and flirt with and rely on to show up whenever they could feasibly manage it (and sometimes when it's a little unfeasible too).

The narrative even acknowledges that Buck had no reason to go to Bobby in this scenario, when he often would, and lays out exactly why.

Within the canon of this particular arc, we're meant to see this as Buck realizing he has the experience necessary to think these things through on his own. This is Buck finally taking control of something that's always felt like it fell into his lap a bit. This is Buck doing more than treading water until his legs give out.

And minimizing that growth bc you personally don't like the LI he's pursuing is gross at best. At worst it's something much more insidious.

[catchcrows]

"You're the closest thing I have to a father."

[yardsards]

anyway i just find it Interesting how saying "i prefer these two as a platonic pairing" is often considered to be hating on a romantic interpretation of the pair. but saying "i prefer these two as a romantic pairing" is not seen as hating on a platonic interpretation of the pair. almost like fandom as a whole still sees platonic relationships as lesser than romantic relationships. almost like too many fans still think that platonic relationships can't be worth caring about in their own right. almost like fandom tends to be full of amatonormativity.

[squeakadeeks]

its crazy to me how much art really does force you to make peace with embarrassment. i remember reading someone talking about this not too long ago and it really did make me realize that if you want to do just about anything with art, at some point you have to tangle with the beast that is making a complete fool out of yourself and being extremely embarrassing. you just got to take it, accept it, even love it, and roll on. its not a symptom to be cured !! it is the experience !! !!!

[sthilarions]

I can’t figure out how to word this post right but… someone seeing Charles kiss Edwin and asking “Wait, you’re gay?” and him responding “Huh? No. It’s just Edwin?”

But not in the sense of - it’s only Edwin, he’s only gay for Edwin, but in the sense of - it’s… it’s not a big deal, it’s just Edwin. It doesn’t have to change anything about him, because it’s just Edwin. It’s the person he’s spent nearly every second with for decades. The person who is so close to him they practically live in the same skin. Edwin with whom any sort of affection is equally comfortable because it’s Edwin, it doesn’t mean anything more about his sexuality than it would if he kissed his own hand. Kissing him is as utterly casual (and as mind-meltingly wonderful) as leaning over his shoulder to look at his books. It’s not a big deal. It’s just Edwin.

[basilone]

[vagueconfusion]

I've been having this thought about Alkaline and the process of alkaline hydrolysis/aquamation (aquamation -> cremation -> funeral pyre?? (all the burial/earth imagery in the eps*) brain please I'm busy) and had the thought in the shower of wondering what the pH of the human body is and now it's taking over my brain and I can't tell if this is too far of a reach because I'm on the verge of doing a whole write up about this topic too.

(Summary: Alkaline possibly referring/being a metaphor for/about about a process called alkaline hydrolysis, which is used as an alternative to cremation and uses water and a strong alkaline solution (lye) to rapidly decompose a body in a matter of hours. The human body's pH is around 7, which is also the track number of the song Alkaline, and also the line "neither acid nor alkaline" would put the subject of the song at pH 7 as well. Which would make The POV Vessel sings from the lye solution)

Also This:

[eevachu]

Commuting to my seasonal job and had time for some exploratory doodles of Miss Charlie Morningstar (and also some chaggie doodles in the margins). Trying to figure out how I wanna draw her widdle snoot, mostly.

[loveisonlyforthebrave8]

[todays-just-a-daydream]

hi he said this in june 2023 rolling stone interview podcast:

"In the lockdown I wrote about the best part of 40 songs," he told Rolling Stone. "So this album was a cross-section of all the different styles that I'd done to that point, which is what I liked about the album. Pretty Boy was a bit like the electronic thing and then there was the Ballad thing and then there was the '60s thing and hen there was like a bit of a jazz thing with Council Skies. So I pick the best things that brought me to this place so far. But there is an acoustic album, as well, which is very stripped back – which I started recording actually recently before I came away [for his current US tour with the High Flying Birds]. And then those years are very heavily guitar bass stadium rock album.

“There is an acoustic album as well, which is very, very stripped back, and which I started recording recently,” he revealed to Rolling Stone: “And then there’s, a very heavily guitar-based, stadium-rock album.”

Rolling Stone then asked the obvious question – why didn't he release that one first?

"I don't know," replied Noel in a rare public display of uncertainty. "I've been proved right anyway in this decision because the album's [Council Skies] been received amazingly well. And better than any album I've ever had so far, so I've been proved right in that respect. But why didn't I go with that? I don't know. I guess because I didn't really know if stadium rock was going to be allowed anymore because of COVID and all that. I didn't know if there was going to be a tour or any of that s*** – things have changed drastically.

"But the guitar album, I'm looking forward to recording," Noel added. "But it's time I did an acoustic album, because I've got a lot of songs that are quite harrowing – they've obviously written in the time of the breakup [Noel is going through a divorce from his wife Sarah MacDonald after 22 years together]. So I want to get that out and then do a euphoric guitar record."

[many-gay-magpies]

seeing all these posts talking about payneland as if its some tragic unrequited love drives me insane ngl. or i guess not TRAGIC but the posts that are like "man edwin really got every boy except the one he wanted" HE ALREADY HAD HIM. HE ALREADY FUCKING HAD HIM ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?? MAYBE NOT ROMANTICALLY BUT GOD HE HAD HIM. AND HE STILL HAS HIM.

[punkitt-is-here]

some behind the scenes shots from my thesis film!

[gigglingauspice]

I really do not enjoy when I see mouthwashing fanart where Jimmy has inexplicably been made multiple shades darker than he actually is.

He’s white, and roughly the same skintone as pre crash curly, roughly the same as swansea. Will you please stop and think about the implications you are making before you adjust that man’s skintone.

Especially when you give him a bigger nose, or sharper teeth. The ideas that you may unwittingly be enforcing are not great.

For your convenience, here is a 3D model of Jimmy.

[rosaacicularis]

the juxtaposition of scarian makes me physically ill