#dreamed-itself-waking
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#nbc hannibal#hannibal#hannigram#murder husbands#hannibal lecter#will graham#dreamed-itself-waking#hannibal nbc#hannibal memes#mads mikkelsen#hugh dancy
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being aromantic is like. hey btw you're going to live a life that is the culmination of most of society's worst nightmares. sorry lol ✌️ but then you turn around and take a really good hard look at it and it turns out that living in that nightmare is fucking awesome and you get to wake up every day and take that fear that other people have and laugh and hold it close until it's a great joy for you instead. and being happy is a radical act that you define instead of someone else. and you're sexy as fuck that's just a fact of life i don't make the rules on that one
#aromantic people are just sexy i'm not making the decisions here it's just facts#course ur hot as fuck. it came free with the aromanticism#being sexy is just default settings for aromantic people 👍#hope this all helps. anyway i'm on my 'i hope i die alone <3 i can't wait to die alone <3' kick rn#i think the existential fear that people have of Not Partnering specifically is so. well.#obviously that shit is strong and it is SO awesome to be free of it.#realizing you're aro and you don't Want a partner can be such a hit to the solar plexus#cause society says that's the only thing that'll make you happy. so either you go without that thing or you force yourself#into doing something you don't want which would make you unhappy anyway.#so you think it's a lose lose situation and you have to come to terms with what amatonormativity presents as the worst possible situation#but then! whoa! turns out personhood is inherently valuable in and of itself and romantic partnering is just a construct!#and that nightmare is now your life to do with as you please... define as you will... structure as you want...#best case scenario. is what i'm saying.#every day i wake up ready to spit all that amatonormative rhetoric back in life's teeth by being alone and being happy#and it's so fucking satisfying. every day.#fucking JUBILANT being by myself. and i love being a living breathing 'fuck you' to the romantic system#you need a partner to be happy? oh that's sooo fucking crazy guess i'll go be miserable then. in my perfect fucking dream life lmao#yeah obviously it's the worst possible outcome on earth to die without a partner. so terrible. can't wait for it :)#aromantic#aromanticism#aro positivity#aroace#arospec#sorry to bitches who are sad about not having a partner. i could not give a fuck though get better soon#you couldn't EVER pay me enough to go back to a mindset in which my inherent value wasn't enough by myself.#FUCK that shit. absolutely miserable and a bad life outlook in general. like genuinely do the work w/ amatonormativity and get better#life is something that can be so fulfilling whether someone wants to kiss you or whatever or not#i'm on antidepressants and i have people i care deeply about. what the fuck would i need a partner for lmao
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you ever have a dream that's clearly constructed as a fragment of something larger and then wake up like "why isn't this a genuine story with a fandom so I can see more of what just happened and also talk to people about it"
#and THEN to add insult to injury#because so much of the effect was dependent on outside context that your brain was only pretending actually existed#the dream itself is harder to hang onto once you wake up
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i had a dream where something was off with riku’s shadow…
(this art is so sucks i made this when i was tired and less experienced which ended up making riku look so much skinnier than how i normally draw him post-kh2 can you stop engaging it with pretty pweeease)
#beep boop you want fries with that#kingdom hearts#riku#(and ansem. in shadow form)#IGNORE THE MISTAKE OF RIKUS HAND AUUGHH I HATE DRAWING HANDS#riku wasnt wearing his dream drop distance outfit but i drew him with it because. well. dream LOL#its so weird like it wasnt even clear what world he was in#he was in some sort of tavern?? so maybe you’d think it was the kingdom of corona#liek the snuggly duckling but it definitely wasnt#i couldnt tell you why but trust me#it was kinda surreal that i actually had a dream about kingdom hearts. go figure#its like the hardest thing in the world to have a dream about a fixation im having#usually my dreams are trauma. and me dying. sometimes both.#and if it is about my fixation it’s usually me getting a bunch of merch of it and then i wake up and whoops i dont have it#or i just forget all of my dreams and wake up with nothing to think about.#so i like it when i have some cool bizarre shit related to my fixation happen#its funny because this sounds like something that would happen in either kh itself or someones fanfiction#i wouldnt be surprised if someone has already drawn or written about this#anyway gn i hope i have another weird dream about kh
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ILYSIA INGELLVAR ↳ "Did you hear they found the girl asleep in one of the newly moved chambers again? All dazed and unwashed and famished when they woke her up. No different than when we found her as a babe. Wonder if she'll ever change."
#dragon age#da:tv#datv spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#daedit#daedits#datvedit#rook#rook ingellvar#da ocs#my ocs#mygifs#my girl has a really hard time sleeping cos the dreaming takes a Lot out of her but when she can sleep she enters a fucking Coma#and sometime the necropolis rearranges itself while shes dreaming and she wakes up horribly lost#and the other watchers will find her days later looking like a rat in spilled oil fldjdkKDJDKDJ#ilysia ingellvar#I FORGOT TO TAG HER FUCKING NAME AGAIN
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having top surgery in 3 days and i havent been able to focus on literally anything for the past 2 weeks because ive been in Waiting Mode. you know the one. you make a drs appointment in the afternoon and even though you wake up at 8 am the whole day is going to be spent Waiting for that appointment. you have a party to go to at night but you get ready early and sit there because you have to Wait. this executive really do be dysfunctioning
#and im so fucking anxious#not about the surgery itself obviously#just. unfounded anxiety?????#the anxiety of Waiting#like something's gonna happen somehow and itll be cancelled#which is bullshit obviously its so set in stone you could carve hieroglyphics into that bitch#i havent been able to enjoy the lead up at all or experience any relief because part of me thinks it still somehow isnt happening#and i wont be able to believe it until i wake up afterwards#apparently achieving a dream comes with side effects. who knew#anyway#tbd
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Piggybacking off something you said during your last stream, I also had a dream where the welcome home site updated and it was super messed up
I can’t remember the exact details but I do remember Barnaby was the focus, like there was a secret page about him and it played it off like Barnaby was some deranged maniac-
Just something I remembered after hearing you also had a creepy dream
it's comforting to know im not the only one subconsciously scared of such Things
#the contents of my wh update Nightmare were ummmmm much worse than that but yeah#nodding across a room at you in solidarity#its scary right? like the dream itself is fucked but you wake up and its like#Thank Fucking God that wasnt real lmao#rambles from the bog#man... the music that played in mine... the Warnings before it started playing...#horrible horrible stuff! poor sally is all i'll say!
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Sighh. Trying to figure out if I'm going to project onto Night again for this next drabble....
#spotatalk#trying to think what Night's reaction to being ACTUALLY sick would be#because I genuinely think Ccino took such good care of him and Dream (plus the whole Paradise Kingdom thing) that he's never been sick#before. like. with a cold.#so when he wakes up after a long night running a fever and coughing and wheezing and his throat feels like it's trying to#choke him out itself and his msgic is weak? he 10000% thinks he got poisoned and is like. inconsolable for a solid hour#before everyone reassures him it's just a cold#actually. i like the idea that it's Cross who's experienced the same Allergy/Cold double-punch combo before and manages to calm him down#I just think Night's track-record states that he hates having to be out of the race because. he trusts the others but. he doesn't want to#burden them. and Ccino cares for him but he also has the duties of the castle and he's choosing to stay and-#y'know all the sadness and worry between his fitful rests are consuming him. Cross ends up being his solution because (since he doesn't have#his mask yet) he doesn't have tasks to be doing in Night's wake and Night logics his way into feeling less bad about wanting the attention#(and ofc Cross wears soft clothes and Night likes his general aura and also he's the one least likely to tease him and accidentally hurt his#feelings- the whole nine yards lmao-#okay post over. minor lore post following shortly lol-
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for only showing up in the live action segments, it’s absurd how much mr door and thomas zane have consumed my thoughts. could not even begin to imagine what mr door’s role is in future games, let alone anything for zane, but the mystery only adds to the intrigue. so much of this goes to just how phenomenal the actors are—they performed every scene with intention and charisma
#alan wake 2#thomas zane#warlin door#mr door#I keep posting about how much I love the characters in these games but it’s deserved !#so curious to what exactly mr door meant to Alan when he said the next time#they meet it’ll be different and to play his role or stay out of his way.. many thoughts#and Zane !#all of the moments we get of him in the first game DLCs house of dreams (and AWAN—haven’t played this one lol) make him. fascinating#like truly there’s so many interpretations of this character not just by fans but in the story itself#that his existence itself is strange and interesting#layers upon layers or whatever Alan says#also i think he’s funny#and i need more of him and darling
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for garry, hihi jets, and hafs // one way or another, we'll meet each other on the moon
#hihi jets#zine#writing#there is a sense of knowing and not-knowing about dreams that makes me paranoid to remember#it's scary when it slowly morphs into a memory because it feels like it eludes our grasp more easily more cruelly#like at its tail-end when you're about to wake up and the dream starts getting farther and farther until you're back in place wherever#but to have had a dream at all is a joy of life in itself#thanks for opting into a second fancall at the last minute that one time. i hope happiness follows you like rain during your concerts lol#i'll send you off with a smile when the time comes
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#nbc hannibal#hannibal#will graham#hannibal memes#hannibal lecter#hannigram#dreamed-itself-waking#hannibal nbc
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mystery of stigmata #6
#mystery of stigmata#ok so context for this one is that its a dream and it does end badly w kiana dying and mei waking up worried ofc#and the comic itself is retconned but still.#kia/mei#mei#hi3wt#liveblog tag#hnk3#cant wait to show this to aiya
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so do the rest of you guys just simplify your dreams when explaining them to people or do I just remember a significantly weirder degree of depth than the average bear
#thinking about shit like this every morning when i wake up after like#spending the past however many hours in part of a high stakes cop drama that takes place in the pokemon world#but my pokemon is actually an elder scrolls character pretending to be a weird rare pokemon because it's easier than passing as human#and the fair we are trying to get through is down a dirt road alley that's also a depressingly empty polynesian farmers market#and we gotta go fast because my irl friend who's with us really wants to have a mantine draped over his shoulders like when he was a kid#but then we find out that the mantine encounter was at the aquarium next to the fair and not the fair itself and he just misremembered#so he's all sad while we're riding go karts and dirtbikes because he doesn't get to play with the mantines#but anyway we were here for the cop drama bit because some teenage girl got assaulted and we need to beat up the perp's pokemon#(perp himself has already been bagged)#and now I'm realizing that I don't know what fake pokemon moves to tell my fake “pokemon” to use#(he's a daedric prince it's not like he'd listen to me anyway he's about to obliterate the fuck outta this sunflora no matter what I say)#which leads me to wondering why I can't think of a decent steel-type pokemon move similar to slash#(“metal claw only works if you have claws” I think to myself wondering why there isn't some kind of sword move like ffs honedge exists)#anyway he's already finished the fight so it doesn't matter we can go home back through the depressing farmers market#home is aboard a KotoR-esque spaceship of course which is good because it means I get “back at camp” dialog with my daedra friend#but he's gone now shit fuck where did he go is he killing people without me this is bad I leave and start walking through crowded streets#people are trying to sell me shit but I ignore them#I'm accosted by a guy dressed like an old-west outlaw who says that he's with the vigil of stendarr and he's here hunting daedra#I tell him to fuck off because honestly I'm no longer invested in this dream's narrative arc#(I'm trying to envision a different scenario that is more appealing to my current tastes but lucid dreaming was a lie and I can't hack it)#then I wake up#next night I dream about being an omnipotent dragon god with a marsupial pouch full of my adopted babies (JJK characters)
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to be honest with everybody I don't think I'm supposed to be here. I think I'm supposed to be somewhere else
#talking#when i was young i would play the same games over and over and i would think obsessively about what was beyond the area provided#i wanted so desperately to see the inside of the apartments in castelia city i would spend hours thinking about it#imagining what im missing#thinking with certainty there would be more to the game if i could just get to the points out of reach somehow#that same feeling of believing theres more out there but being locked out of it by some third party keeps happening#ill have dreams that feel infinitely more familiar and certain than the memories and experiences i have in real life#ill be gone for months only to wake up and learn none of it happened and it was just another product of my imagination#feels like im going nuts when i say i dont think the life im living is correct or accurate or. what word do i want#genuine? i dont feel like this is as real as it presents itself to be#i really dont know how to explain any of what im feeling without sounding like ive absolutely lost my mind. honestly maybe i have lost it#i just know that in my dreams the 'abnormal' events that occur feel infinitely more organic & real than the events that occur when im awake#like at some point in my childhood i fell into this parallel universe and nobody ever came to retrieve me so now this is how i live#all the surrealist media was right. i think im supposed to live somewhere more infinite and less. real? grounded?#i dont know. thinking about it makes my chest hurt#i dont know what the hell any of this is todays tag talk sort of got away from me and for that i applogize#ill toss it in the queue since ive been so chatty lately#saw this was still in the queue so im coming back to say i watched a movie about things like this#and i truly felt like i was dying#very fun
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Weird thought but it feels undeniable that Hollow Knight has inspiration drawn from Bloodborne. Dreams and nightmares, finding a way to see the unseeable (insight/dreamnail), higher beings with inconceivable power (especially reached in dreams).
So do you think lifeblood is supposed to be a sort of subtle reference to the idea of the blood administration in Bloodborne? A ‘taboo’, addictive substance that heals/gives life.
This has probably been said before but I just realized it myself- Don’t mind me.
#Eldritch squeaking#hollow knight#like surely.#huge madness plague brought on by a higher being that makes things stronger in return for all individuality#a plague from the gods#dream and nightmare worlds that link to the waking world and are home to fallen warriors in their prime#SURELY.#dude even the way the entire hk map links and loops on itself is remniscent of the bloodborne map and how areas link together#this would make me extremely happy because both these games fuck#I forgot about soul but lifeblood straight up has blood in the name
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Identified Fucking Thing ("Bon")
#prince talks#I know he isn't about to jumpscare me but I don't trust him not to for reasons I can't articulate. can't look at him on his own page long#like at least Bon the Animatronic it's like yeah this thing WILL get me. he's the Animatronic of the Animatronic Horror#outside of that I think it's very funny that Bon's ai is the most blankest slate smiling blob thing ever. at least right now#my computer rebooted itself completely without warning while I was trying to post this. he is displeased.#between finding this out last night and my last wakeful thought being 'can't believe Edd had to get rabies shots'#my dreams were very files themed
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