#doomed severitus

[marriso1]

harry being forced to not only watch snape help kids in general, but specifically help those considered to be pretty close to harry or just known to have bad relations with snape would end in him feeling pretty disheartened. The adults Harry was raised by were abusive assholes who very much treated him disgustingly, he’s learnt that ‘mean’ adults don’t care for the wellbeing’s of children they don’t like. Seeing snape, who would treat his students unfairly in class, help those from broken or dysfunctional households on its own must’ve been a shock for him. However seeing the same with Ron and Neville must’ve been unthinkable to him.

Harry seeing this and still being treated the same would most definitely mess with him. Before he really saw Snape in such a light he would’ve laughed at the prospect of him possibly getting help from Snape. Yet, however much he may dislike Snape, there’s still a tiny part of him screaming for help anyways. He’d be angry at Snape for never noticing but angrier with himself for wanting to be noticed in general. Like you’ve said, the self doubt and mood swings he’d be going through would be constant.

Harry going through such is a very important aspect to me. Taking a crumb of hope just for it to be stomped on. Wistful thinking going to an ‘unexpected’ depressive state once this happens. The “maybe ifs” and harry going through every scenario in his head if he were to gets snapes help. The way you’ve described him going through this reminded me of the quote, “Nobody’s coming to save you. Get up.” by Nathaniel Brandon. He’d be constantly picking himself up after being broken apart by other people (dursleys,voldemort,etc) and their actions.

one, do you come from frown town? i feel like you’ve just ripped my heart out. anyways, this is beautifully written and described. when i was reading what you wrote i felt like i was reading a fic and casually waiting for snape to notice and harry plus the rest of the children in need with snape to ride off into the sunset just for it not to happen💔

Tw: Child abuse

While I don’t envision Harry to be a particularly jealous person in the books, I can’t help but think about certain situations with Severitus where that emotion might come out.

I especially think about it when fanfics depict Severus as a protector for abused children in slytherin or Hogwarts as a whole. I think Harry seeing how Snape treats other children compared to him would enrage him.

Just seeing everything that he could have if things were just a little bit different, if he was sorted into slytherin, or if he just had a different father, or some other insignificant thing, he could have had the love, care and protection he always wanted. He could have had someone on his side who actually fought for him, was willing to do the hard stuff for him.

But he doesn’t just get jealous of how Snape treats other children, he gets jealous of the fact that Snape FINDS OUT about the other children’s abuse. He sees how easily Severus seems to pick up on other kids flinching, hiding injuries, or peculiar behavior, taking them aside after class within the first year, first month of school. Yet, after years of knowing him, Snape seems to have no clue. He sees that and can’t help but think why not him as well, he gets so so angry.

The anger and jealousy doesn’t stick however as he just ends up thinking maybe the way the dursleys treat him isn’t so bad, after all, if the number one person in the school for detecting abuse can’t see it, maybe it’s not actually abuse. And anyways, he should be grateful the other kids have someone to go to.

And somewhere deep down he thinks it’s his fault, because he has gotten rather good at covering up their tracks over the years. How can he blame the Professor when he purposefully hides the evidence?

Anyways hope yall enjoyed this rant :D

[thatsillything]

One of my headcanon's on Snape it's that he saved everything that Lily gifted him. From small birthday cards to the book bag she gave him before the school year the year they had a fight. After their argument, he never appeared again with that bag, so it remained in good condition. That's why adult Snape has a box in the far corner of the closet with a bunch of gifts from Lily, like it's a time capsule.

I'm not normal about it and it's also would be interesting in Severitus settings because Harry would definitely found this box while snooping around a house

[lightningant]

I got back into HP for severitus and aberforth albus brother drama. the fact i got sucked into a tom riddle black hole instead is literally so embarrassing. of all characters. i mean i have an overwhelming tendency to latch onto corruption arcs and emotionally unstable self-dooming maniacs already but like the fervor with which i did so

[mrs-snape5984]

“Can we always be this close…forever and ever?”

“My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue. All's well that ends well to end up with you.” (“Lover” by Taylor Swift)

Today I want to share something more cheerful with all you lovely people of Snapedom, because - to be honest - considering my last few posts on this blog, they could suggest the idea, that I might not be the most zestful person around here. Well…guilty as charged! 😅So, please, take my apologies for my constant venting and complaining about ME/CFS and the ways, in which this bitch of a disease destroyed the life, I’ve known before. But this particular post will be dedicated to LOVE.

I know, I’m using this blog as my personal journal in order to cope with the hardships of my existence, always relying on my 21 years lasting connection with Severus Snape…who is undeniably the one true love of my life. Some of you might judge or mock me for being so pathetically devoted to a fictional character over such a long period of time, but believe me…my love for Severus is my safe haven!

Sure, I’ve tried to give other relationships a shot, but after some really traumatic experiences with men and women, as well as two failed marriages, I’m coming to the conclusion, that I’m better off alone. I must admit, that being doomed to endure a so called life in my bed, only surrounded by darkness and mostly solitude, definitely has an influence on this conviction. Who knows, if I’d have the same beliefs if I weren’t “un-dateable”…but this doesn’t matter anymore, since there’s still no cure for my disease.

And yet… (enter dramatic sigh here 😂)

And yet, I still believe in love, despite my own failures…despite all the pain, the sorrows, the humiliation and the traumas, I’ve been confronted with. I guess, being intelligent (or at least well educated) and overly realistic didn’t prevent me from being a hopeless romantic human being.

My adolescent twins are currently entering the phase of their first “loves”. I’ve taught my three children from the very beginning, that it doesn’t matter, whom they love, unless they’re feeling safe and happy about it. My daughter is proud to have her first girlfriend, even though she’s already facing some difficulties in her environment, due to her frank nature to enjoy her crush. For me - a woman, who’s living openly bisexual 🏳️‍🌈 since I’ve been 14 years old - it’s absolutely unbelievable, that there are still so many people in our society, who seem to stick to their restrained beliefs about sexuality and gender. I will always try to support my children in their journey of self-acceptance and self-discovery.

So, yes, I still believe in love…no matter how this love might look like. Even though I’m confined to this prison, which is formed by my disease, I was allowed to find some kind of deep love in my friends. I want to share a short poem with you (written by Whitney Hanson for her book “Harmony”) which reminds me of the love, that I feel for these friends of mine:

I have always loved the way

Music could make the world feel

Like it doesn’t exist

As if suddenly all my fears

Are swept away

Who knew

That there are people out there

Who could make me feel the same way

Another love, which makes my heart swell with joy, is my love to all those amazingly talented artists of Snapedom, for whom I’m rolling out the red carpet on my blog, by using their art as my very personal soothing balm for my troubled heart and soul. This time, I’ve commissioned the lovely @kruzbr for the very first time. I’ve been fallen for their Severitus comics, so I asked them to help me out with making my own version of Severitus, together with my undeniably self-inspired OC Jules, come to life.

Anderson, your understanding of my ideas and your kindness made it a pleasure for me to join the process of creating this mesmerising masterpiece of art. I’m beyond grateful for your service and I can assure you, that this won’t be the last time, I will commission you for another adventure of Sevy & Jules. The next idea is already stuck in my mind, so keep an eye on your postbox! Thank you for everything, my dear!

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

[gywin97]

I’ve been re-reading some of my favourite HP fics as I wait for HL to come out, and I love how you can tell which house the author is in based on how they’re ‘fix-it’ fic goes:

Gryffindor

-          Massive, Avengers-style epic final showdown between Voldie and Harry

-          Golden Trio + Neville

-          “Harry no-” “Harry YES!”

-          Harry Potter / Ron Weasley have absolutely zero impulse control and it’s giving Hermione high blood pressure

-          Weasley Twins! Weasley Twins!

-          The Order is like 60% Weasley it’s basically gingers against fascism

-          Dumbledore is powerful but angry Minera McGonagall is terrifying

-          Sirius Black has more than five minutes of screentime.  

-          Remus Lupin is the one responsible adult in the room

-          “There’s no need to call me Sir, professor.”

-          Slytherins are all baddies, no redemption arc for you

-          Umbridge get’s GOT

-          *Draco makes a Weasel joke at Ron* Hermione: “You were literally a ferret.”

Ravenclaw

-          Harry visits the library and learns more spells than goddamn ‘expelliarmus’

-          Sassy!Harry, Smart!Harry,

-          The fuck kinda school is this??!?!

o   *See’s moving staircases* Really, right in front of my OSHA regulations?

o   So they’re really just letting anyone teach DADA, huh?

o   Susan Bones / Kingsley Shacklebolt shows up and lays down the law

-          Callouts for every plothole, and I mean EVERY plothole.

-          Someone notices the SOUL FRAGMENT living in Harry’s forehead

o   “Harry Potter must die” “Ok but have you tried literally anything else???”

-          Using magical gadgets (Time Turners, Sneakoscope, etc) and the Room of Requirement

-          Actual pagan rituals sprinkled in for flavor (Samhain, Yule, etc)

-          Witch  Wizard Wixen

Hufflepuff

-          Everyone lives / nobody dies, Happy Endings, Found Family

-          Characters actually sit down and deal with their TRUMA

-          “My cupboard-” “Your what?”

-          Harry is a sweetheart, polite to everyone

o   This includes Filch / House Elves / Goblins

o   no one can say no to his big green puppy eyes, sorry that’s illegal.

o   Snape/Minerva see’s Lily’s eyes and have emotions

-          Someone (Often Pomfrey) notices Harry’s abuse and takes action.

o   *Smacking Dumbledunce with a rolled-up newspaper* What! Were! You! Thinking!?

o   Harry gets adopted, and his new guardians are outside the Dursley’s house holding baseball bats.

-          You get a redemption arc, you get a redemption arc, EVERYBODY GETS REDEMPTION ARCS!!

Slytherin

-          Harry is a Slytherin / befriends Slytherins.

o   “Slytherin will never accept Harry Potter!” *Ten minutes later* “We’ve only had Harry Potter for a day and a half but if anything happened to him we’d kill everyone in this room and then the Dark Lord.”

o   Slytherin kids get personalities besides ‘mean’ and ‘henchmen’

o   Blasie Zabini is always a slut. I don’t know why this is universal, but it just is.

o   Theo Nott is always the nerd.

-          “So are we just gonna just not talk about the Chamber of Secrets or…?”

-          Fuck this, Fuck the Ministry, Fuck the Wizengamot, here’s 60 reasons why

-          BAMF Narcissa Malfoy

-          Harry gets a pet snake and regularly speaks Parseltongue

-          Severitus or Mentor!Snape:

o   Severus Snape hates James Potter but he hates child abuse more

o   “So I live with my aunt Petunia-” “Tunie?!?!”

o   The Eyebrow of Doom

o   Harry learning more about his mum than her eye color

-          Severus Snape ends up with a small pack of children following him around and he’s not sure how that happened but Merlin help anyone who fucks with them

-          Dumbledore call-out

-          It’s not dark or light magic, it’s just magic

[above-asphodel]

ever wonder if your friends have another groupchat without you in it ? I have several smaller groupchats for different parts of my friend group but I wonder if there's one without me. what's making me wonder this is I've decided to not talk to my friends for a bit, which is nothing to their fault I'm just in a bit of an unprompted mental crisis at the moment. I think they think I've decided to properly lock in to study for exams but actually I'm reading fanfiction lol. the heir to the house of prince is really good btw u should check it out if u like severitus stuff. I have an exam tmr and I've barely studied for it. my brain just can't handle complex mathematics and this strange impending sense of doom I'm holding at the same time

[dia-oro]

Stranger: you cannot ship this with snape

Me: why?

Stranger: because is gross and snape its a ass

Me: but i have this awesome found family snamione after the war with severus raising hermione baby also a severitus with hermione time travel i know he complicate and with so many traumas but look how happy harry is also hermione is trying to give back harry is godfat-

Stranger: *ready yo terminate me*

Me: buuuuuuuuuuuut also look at this snuna ! :D luna is pure luna is good you cannot hate a snuna, luna making someone happy is so wholesome and-

Stranger: D O Ń T

Me: .... whould you like a fluffy wholesome and vainilla snil-

Stranger: *triggered*

Me: .... so... hermione and harry time travel and making young sev-

Stranger: nah

Me: you don't let me fi-

Stranger: meh

Me: why you hate everything i say?? I have see the most wholesome fix it and snape was happy and lucius was no doomed yo follow his father path also drarry-

Stranger: gross gross gross gross gross 🎶🎶

Me: but ship and let shi-

Stranger: you know that a lie?

Me:

Me: oh great now not only nothing i do make you happy but also destroy my hopes for respect just great.

[felixfeliciswriterblog]

Snapetober 2020 - Day 30: Self Hatred

Warnings: mentions of death, angst.

Length: 1414 words.

This is a missing scene from my main Severitus Snape x OC fic. Severus is married to Skyrah. They have a son (Corbin) who is about 1.

A MAGNIFICENT SPY

“Lumos,” whispered Severus.

He ascended the stairs slowly, making sure they didn’t creak under his feet and awaken anybody from their slumber. In the crib was his son, unaware of the pure evil and injustice in the world. Whenever Corbin smiled in his sleep, as he was doing now that his father was caressing his chubby cheeks, Severus would smile back. Not that night, though. He kissed Corbin on the forehead, making up for the goodnight kiss he had missed, and walked towards his own bedroom. The dim light coming through the half-open bedroom door told him that Skyrah, unlike her sister, Harry, and Corbin, wasn’t sleeping. He peeped through the door.

She was seated on the bed, with his pillow positioned on her back and head. A History book – the one she read whenever she was anxious – lay on her flexed knees. His first thought was that the light the old lamp from the nightstand emitted made her skin glow.

Beautiful, she was beautiful.

Everything about the Death Eaters meeting had been hideous.

Malfoy Manor had been dark, cold. One look at his wife and he felt warmer. It still wasn’t enough. He wanted her to look at him. Only then might he be able to forget Charity’s eyes before she…

Don’t go there, he told himself.

At the creaking door, Skyrah shot her head up. His name tripped off her tongue, breathy. Her eyes were tender, inviting. She tossed the book onto the nightstand and leaped out of the bed.

Cupping his chin to inspect his face, she asked, “Are you wounded?” 

Yes. Not physically. “No.”

“Are you okay?”

Not at all. “Yes.”

“Liar.”

Despite having promised they wouldn’t lie to each other, she did not sound incriminating but merely concerned. If there was something Severus disliked, that was worrying his wife.

“Did Corbin wake you up? Is that why you are awake?”

She took a step back, withdrawing her hands from his face, hurt.

"Is this what you think of me? That I’m incapable of staying awake for my husband?” Severus was about to reply when she held up her palm. “Corbin’s been sleeping like a log.”

He gulped at her cutting tone. “It is late. You should be resting.”

“I can’t rest when I’m worried.”

“I do not want you to worry so much about me. It is not healthy.”

She snorted. “I couldn’t agree more. Ease my worries. You could start by telling me what happened in the meeting in which my father thought my presence and his heir’s weren’t needed.” He drew in an intake of air and averted her gaze. More softly, she whispered, “Please.”

Severus… Please… Please… Help me!

His face contorted in pain.

When Skyrah took his hand, he locked their gazes. Her eyes were full of love, begging. Merlin. How was he supposed to tell her? Would she hate him as much as he hated himself if she found out? He walked past her and sat on the edge of the bed, lowering his head. His hair might have covered his distressed face like a curtain, but it did nothing to muffle Voldemort’s sibilant voice in his head.

Dinner, Nagini.

Severus gripped the edges of the bed, biting his lip to keep from screaming. Skyrah’s arm slithered around his waist. A kiss landed on the corner of his eye. It was then he noticed he had let a tear fall. She kissed his cheekbone, the corner of his mouth, his jaw, and rested her head on his shoulder. After that, his heart did not ache so much.

“You don’t have to tell me now… Just tell me what I can do for you for the time being. I just… I hate seeing you like this. I want to help you feel better, and I don’t know how if I don’t know what’s going on.”

He let out a shaky breath and leaned into her. Getting the hint, she tightened her grip on him and cuddled him in silence, waiting for him to make the next move.

“She said…” He trailed off. Skyrah raised her head, looking at him. “She said we were friends. She viewed me as her friend. I had to see her die.”

Friends?

His circle of acquaintances was limited to say the least. Skyrah considered the people who could have died in that reunion. Whoever she was, she used to work at Hogwarts. All his friends worked there, except the Malfoys, if they could be considered friends.

“Narcissa?”

“No. No, Narcissa is fine. A bit sick after witnessing the scene, like her son, but Lucius will take care of his family.”

“If the person isn’t a Malfoy then…” He shut his eyes. His silence spoke volumes. With a sinking heart, Skyrah cupped his face, forcing him to make eye contact. “Who?”

He shook his head. “I don’t want you to suffer more because of this damned war.”

“I work at Hogwarts, too. I will find out sooner or later. I want to know it now.”

He swallowed hard. “Professor Burbage… Charity.”

Skyrah gasped, blinking back tears. Although they weren’t close friends, Charity was passionate about her subject, terribly kind and tolerant, the kind of person that gave the desolate faith in humanity. She had appeared genuinely happy to find out about the Snapes’ marriage, and had once babysat Corbin.

“Charity died thinking I was on the Dark Lord’s side, a Death Eater.”

“But you aren’t,” she whispered, squeezing his waist. “You are a good man.”

“I sentenced her to death. Is that your definition of ‘a good man’?”

His sarcasm didn’t scare her. Nor did his self-loathing. She was used to them and knew how to combat them.

“Don’t you dare blame yourself for her death. If you’d saved her, your loyalties would be exposed, and we’d be doomed. You saved hundreds of lives. This war would be lost without you. Most wouldn’t have been able to keep their covers under such pressure. You fooled them all. You did your job as a spy, a magnificent job.”

“Maybe I don’t want to be a spy anymore!” He stood up to get away from her touch, breathing hard. “I don’t! I hate it. I have to see innocent people being tortured, murdered in cold blood, and there is nothing I can do about it.”

She rose to her feet and clutched his trembling hand in hers, waiting until his breathing returned back to normal. He didn’t push her away nor snap at her.

Taking it as a positive sign, she said, “I wish you didn’t have to do this. Your life's on the line all the time. It frightens me, but we are in too deep. We can only make the best of this horrible situation so that, one day, we believe the sacrifices you made as a spy were worth it.” He gulped soundly. Skyrah brought his hand to her mouth and gave it a chaste kiss. “Her death won’t be in vain. Not hers. Not Albus’s. Not our daughter’s. Not Lily’s or Daniel’s… Not a single death caused by my father. We’ll help Harry fight him.”

Skyrah changed Severus’s attire to his sleepwear with a flick of her wand. The lights went out next. She yanked him down to bed and spooned him from behind, nuzzling his hair.

“As your friend, Charity wouldn’t like to know you hate yourself so much for something that was out of your control. You’ll turn your pain into the motivation that keeps moving you. You’re so brave, so admirable and loveable,” she crooned, eliciting a sound from him that resembled a sob. “Shh. I love you. I love you even if you hate yourself.”

She dropped kisses on his nape and shoulder until his breathing became regular and deep. Although his body appeared calm, his mind kept reeling. Charity’s cries drilled his brain, as did Bellatrix’s maniac laugh alongside the sound Nagini’s fangs made when they sank into her skin. He could still smell the blood.

Skyrah drifted off to sleep thinking that, by the time he fell asleep in the comfort of her embrace, he would not feel so guilty. She had said it herself.

You fooled them all.

Even her.

Even himself.

He’d convince himself that Charity had to die for the greater good, and he would believe his own lie like Voldemort believed his fake loyalty. He’d move on. He was, after all, a magnificent spy.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: For some reason, my posts don’t appear in the snapetober search tag even if I tag it correctly. Hopefully, you see this one @snapetober​. There’s another post in my blog for this fest (day 18: falling)

I wouldn’t have been able to post this on time if it had been betaed, so I apologize for any mistakes you may have encountered. I did my best.

If you liked it, you can read the main fic here: AO3, FFN.

[femchef]

Suffer Bitch Ficlist

What This List Is: A collection of fics that I’ve read that absolutely fuck me up emotionally, and that I appreciated/loved/needed/have impacted me enough that I’ve saved them for re-reading. If these were paperbacks, the pages would have started falling out long before now.

That said, everything on this list has an emotional resolution (even the few incomplete ones I’ve chosen to include). Nothing on this list is the kind of emotional devastation that leaves the reader feeling empty and used* because honestly I need resolution, and I hate the type of #realism that makes me go “Well what was the fucking point, then”. This list is not comprehensive; if you’re in these fandoms, you’ve likely brushed up against them before. The majority of these authors are well-known, and some of these fics have been around longer than I’d like to be reminded. 

So - what qualifies a fic for this list, anyway? 

Tears and snotty sobbing. Everything on this list has made me cry and also given me emotional chills to some degree in order to make the cut.**

Before You Read: Take any warnings I list below seriously. If it’s something that will fuck you up in a bad way, then don’t read it. Don’t open the link. We all have things that are no-go’s. Full disclosure? I can’t read anything with graphic depictions of sexual assault, though mentions, allusions to, or mild/non-graphic depictions (ex. fade to black scenarios, fuzzy memory recall, etc.) don’t bother me. I take those tags and author’s notes seriously when I’m choosing what to read. Similarly, I’m pretty blasé about a lot of gore or body horror - except, specifically, when someone is rolling around in a pit of used needles (thanks for that, Saw movies). Guess what I avoid reading? In short: be a responsible reader. Don’t be self-destructive and proceed with however much caution you require.

*a life of smoke and silvered glass is an outlier and should not be counted.

**As a baseline, please keep in mind that the first time I read JRRT’s The Two Towers, I threw my book across the room when I got to the end. Also, the scene in Whale Rider where Paikea is on stage is the one time I started gross-sobbing in a movie theatre. Make of that what you will.

On to the list!

Suffer Bitch Ficlist:

(Presented to you in order of least impactful to most)

Invitation/Complication

It’s Green

Skin Deep

a life of smoke and silvered glass

Practicing Liars

Family Night

A Wicked Game

A Piercing Comfort

Loud and Clear

Humans and Ghosts

Digging for the Bones

Chivalry 

In Care Of

A Year Like None Other

Stay

Under Wing

Distorting Equivalency 

I’m Not Broken (I Can’t Be)

[The following are in no particular order because I couldn’t decide]

19. Sacrifices Arc

20. Phantom of Truth/Shadow of a Doubt

21. Like One Sundered Star

1. Invitation/Complication Series [Homestuck]

By saffronHeliotrope

You don’t need reminding that everyone is pairing off while you have village-bicycled your way through this group of morons as if you’d never run out of time.

It occurs to you that maybe you need new friends.

Word Count: 8,033

Status: Complete

This series contains two works, one taking place immediately after the other. Have fun angsting with Dave because he can’t seem to wrap his mind around this whole ot3 thing with John and Rose (on their wedding night, ofc). Consenting (if slightly dumb) adults and polyamory all around. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/132165

2. It’s Green [Harry Potter]

By Doodled93

Harry grows up working on his Aunt’s Garden and develops a love for it, meeting Samuel and eventually Max, who gives him a Mark of his own. This Mark is changing him, making him more different than he already was, and he loves it. 

Word Count: 88,549

Status: WiP

This is marvelous kidfic - lots of good fluff. Except. You know - that one OC death that was so heart wrenching that you start bawling. The concept of magical tattoos in this fic is really nice, and Max - a prickly, rough and gruff tattoo artist is the best kind of unintentional parental mentor. The author hasn’t updated in some time, but they’ve also made a note that they’ll come back eventually when they’re ready to update to completion. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/411709/chapters/683216

3. Skin Deep [Fullmetal Alchemist]

By Batsutousai 

Trisha and Van’s first child, Edith, was born a beautiful, healthy girl. The only problem? Ed knew he was a boy.

Word Count: 17,083

Status: Complete 

As you may have guessed from the description, this is a mostly canon AU featuring a trans Edward Elric. I love it, I appreciate how it was written, especially that it’s not a romantic plot - and not only was I crying after the first read, but rereads still give me the sniffles.

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8197400/chapters/18779738

4. a life of smoke and silvered glass [Harry Potter]

By dirgewithoutmusic

Albus Dumbledore rose to his feet, smiling at them in that way of his, like he knew something you didn’t and he was proud of you for it. “Friends,” he began. 

The door thudded open and the Marauders burst in, late and pink-cheeked with cold. The headmaster smiled at them, too, and Sirius gave a cheery little salute back.

Severus sunk lower in his chair, staring witheringly over his butterbeer. “You told Potter about it, too?” 

“He might as well put all that energy to good use,” said Lily. “And to be accurate, I told Remus.” 

“But Potter, really?” said Severus.

“He and Black cooked up a jinx that gives you a boil every time you say a slur to a Muggleborn,” said Lily. “It was either invite them to Alice’s war club or bake them cookies, and I know where my skills lie.” 

Severus sniffed. “Don’t come crying to me if he tugs your pigtails.” 

“Come crying to me if he pulls yours, and I’ll deck him.” said Lily.

(Slight AU in which Severus apologizes, tries harder, and stays friends with Lily.)

Word Count: 22,794

Status: Complete

This is the Severus Snape that canon wanted. The greatest tragedy that never has to explicitly be spelled out (and the reason this fic is so heartbreaking and infuriating) is that the end results are the same.

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11457669

5. Practicing Liars [Harry Potter]

By Lomonaaeren

AU of HBP. Harry found out that he was Snape’s son two years ago, and he’s carefully concealed it. But now Snape is his Defense teacher, and Draco Malfoy is up to something, and Dumbledore is dying, and the final battle is coming up, and everything is getting very, very complicated. 

Word Count: 206,306

Status: Complete

Oh boy, bring on the angst. A Severitus fic with a lot of bitter, petty feelings. Half Blood Prince is such a popular point in HP canon to veer off into AU territory (for good reason), and just - the timing, the missed opportunities, the growth. Lots of feelings. Also drarry. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/990947/chapters/1955931

6. Family Night [Harry Potter]

By Celebony

As Hogwarts starts a quarterly Family Night, Harry is determined to take part. Facing the heartache of looking in all the wrong places, he’ll have to discover the true meaning of family, and that sometimes it comes from where you least expect it. 

Word Count: 33,000

Status: Complete

Eventual Severitus fic. Unhealthy coping mechanisms, emotional abuse, anxiety, self-destructive behavior, angst, grief, and (eventually) healing and recovery - this fic has it all. To me, I think this is the author’s best work, but obviously I have a preference. Fans of Remus tread carefully, this story may not be for you. 

Read here: https://m.fanfiction.net/s/2682144/1/Family-Night

7. A Wicked Game Series [Fullmetal Alchemist]

By Tierfal

Roy has lucked into the all-expenses-paid vacation of his dreams - all he has to do is convince a bunch of happy couples that he’s head-over-heels in love with Ed Elric. What could possibly go wrong? 

[Modern!AU].

Word Count: 64,884

Status: Story is Complete, but Series is still open for possible future oneshots/additions 

Currently three completed works in the series. Roy and Ed as struggling grad students who share lab space stuck in a cabin full of obnoxious couples. This story resonates so well for me, because it was the first time I read something where a character actively struggles with depression where I really felt like someone GOT IT. So, be warned - suicide mentions, depression, angst, and a lot of puns. Safe Roy/Ed, though if that’s not your jam, better take a miss. 

 Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/372113

8. A Piercing Comfort [Harry Potter]

By talithan

When Harry Potter hits the lowest point of his life so far, it is not his friends who keep him honest. With Draco Malfoy’s patience and guidance, Harry learns to stand on his own. The thing is, after the fact - he’s no longer sure he wants to. 

Word Count: 44,566

Status: Complete

This fic has art by onthecount! It’s lovely. Anyway - Oh my god. When I talk about things resonating on some, soul-deep level. The way depression, and trauma, and PTSD is handled is... Well. I don’t go back to this often, but it’s because (for me) reading this fic is cleansing. Draco and Luna as therapists running a burgeoning wizarding practice is pretty great. If you couldn’t guess by reading the summary, this is an eventual drarry fic - and I’ll be upfront, if the idea of dating your former therapists squicks you out, don’t read. I like how it’s written out, it doesn’t feel inappropriate, or like any sort of power imbalance to me, but I can see where that wouldn’t be everyone’s cup of tea either. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/857495

9. Loud and Clear Series [Fullmetal Alchemist]

By Tierfal

The thing with Roy is founded on coffee snobbery and stupid text messages and seriously awesome makeout sessions in the car. Oh, and the love of a lifetime, or whatever.

Word Count: 280,924

Status: WiP

Currently there are six completed works, and one in-progress (with at least one more slated by the author). Also known as ‘The modern!AU Roy/Ed fluffball fic (of doom)’, there is emotional baggage/angst throughout that hints at darker things but nothing too dreadful until the fourth entry in the series, “Another One of Those Heartbreak Songs”. Anxiety, depression, war crimes, rape and consent (and, fyi, one of the best descriptions of what exactly enthusiastic consent IS, is in the current entry of the series, “The Boiling Point”) are all being dealt and felt in this story. Safe Roy/Ed fic that starts with a coffeehouse!AU style meetcute and follows the deepening relationship between Roy (established lawyer who works with veterans) and Ed (making the transition from struggling grad student to frazzled professor), and has a delightful dose of Al/Win tossed in. One of the most relatable things about this series is how all the terrible things about your worst relationships don’t really hit you until you’re smack in the middle of the best relationship you’ve ever had, and it’s ROUGH. Consider this your explicit warning: if mentions of rape/sexual abuse, or abusive ex’s set you off, don’t read.

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/167693

10. Humans and Ghosts [Danny Phantom]

By RedHeadsRock1010

If there was one thing Danny Fenton perfected since receiving his powers, it was how to pretend. 

Word Count: 26,751

Status: Complete

ANGST. Angst and neglectful parents. Angst and neglectful parents and two siblings doing the best they can. Jazz is a real MVP in this story. Also blood and gore. And torture. Oh my god. Still makes me cry. Consider this your explicit warning: if mentions of torture, or neglectful/abusive parenting set you off, don’t read. While it’s not a religious fic, the impact of the parenting codes like some of the horror stories you might have heard about being in the closet and growing up with religious parents. You have been warned. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12315771/chapters/27999459

11. Digging for the Bones [Harry Potter]

By Paganaidd

Rather than allowing Harry to stay at Diagon Alley after he blew up Aunt Marge, the ministry sends Harry back to the Dursley’s. Harry returns to school after a terrible summer, to find that he’s not the only one with this kind of secret. A student has been killed by his family. New screening measures are put into place by the Ministry: Every student must be given a medical exam and interview to look for child abuse. With Dumbledore facing an inquiry, Snape is entrusted with the task of making sure EVERYONE receives one. 

Word Count: 203,178

Status: Complete 

As the author warns before the fic, there is a character death in the first chapter. The story is an AU of Prisoner of Azkaban. Suicide, attempted suicide, and suicidal ideation are a big part of the story. Child abuse, death by child abuse (and the aftermath), ptsd, and the appalling effects of dementors on a castle full of kids are pretty central to the plot. Eventual Severitus. Also accidental necromancy. This is a monumental hurt/comfort fic and there are a LOT of feelings. And angst. Consider this your warning: if explicit attempted suicide, or suicidal thoughts set you off, don’t read. If mentions of physical abuse/child abuse set you off, don’t read.

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/598019/chapters/1078847

12. Chivalry Series [Harry Potter]

When Harry appears at the Welcoming Feast wearing a glamor only Snape notices. Snape decides to find out what the glamor is hiding. 

You, the guiltless, will pay for your father’s sins,

Roman, until you repair the decaying 

Temples and shrines of the gods, and their

Images, filthy with blackening smoke.

When you act as servant of the gods, you rule:

From them all beginning, leave them the ending. 

Horace, Odes III-6

Word Count: 123,467

Status: Series is marked as Ongoing, though individual stories are Complete

Welp. Angst, some explicit child abuse (specifically physically violent Vernon Dursley), grief and mourning, ptsd, accidental potions class disasters that lead to more angst, sickfic, hurt/comfort, blood, gore and violence, child neglect, and eventual found-family by way of Severitus and a developing sibling relationship between Harry and Luna. There is a lot to unpack here. The interactions between Harry, Luna and Severus are especially endearing and heartbreaking. This is your explicit warning: if explicit child abuse /physical abuse set you off, or if accidentally forced (yes, I know how that sounds) flashbacks set you off, don’t read. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/12306

13. In Care Of

By Fangs_Fawn

During the summer before sixth year, Harry finds an injured bat in the garden and decides to try to heal it... and an unwilling Snape learns just what kind of a person Harry Potter really is. 

Word Count: 45,319

Status: Complete 

I’m gonna be upfront with you. Vernon and Dudley Dursley are very sadistic in this story. Tread with caution. That said, along with the angst this is a very solid hurt/comfort fic that is also a reciprocal hurt/comfort fic (in that, first Snape is helped, and then Harry). It’s a nice emotional exchange. Violence - explicit child abuse and torture, grief, and a very petulant animagus. This is your explicit warning: if physical torture/violence sets you off, don’t read.

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1023625/chapters/2036909

14. Like None Other Series [Harry Potter]

By aspeninthesunlight

A letter from home? A letter from family? Well, Harry Potter knows he has neither, but all the same, it starts with a letter from Surrey. Whatever the Dursley’s have to say, it can’t be anything good; so Harry’s determined to ignore it. But then, his evil schoolmate rival spots the letter and his slimy excuse for a teacher intercepts it and forces him to read it. And that sends Harry down a path he’d never have walked on his own.

It will be a year of big changes, a year of great pain, and a year of confronting worst fears. It will be a year of surprising discoveries, of finding true strength, of finding out that first impressions of a person’s true colors do not always ring true. It will be a year of paradigm shifts. 

And from the most unexpected sources, Harry will have a chance to have that which he has never known: a home... and a family.

A sixth year fic, this story follows Order of the Phoenix and disregards any canon events that occur after book 5. 

Word Count: 1,465,418

Status: WiP

Currently there are two completed works in this series, and one ongoing. This is a ROLLERCOASTER, omg. Terminal illness, child abuse, explicit, agonizing torture, grief and mourning, bad coping mechanisms, self-harm, self-destructive behavior - hurt/comfort out the wazoo. Eventual Severitus, this is a good, substantial found-family fic with a developing sibling relationship between Harry and Draco. I really appreciate that Severus, Harry and Draco continue to step on each other’s toes as the story moves along. They get as much wrong as they get right, and the familial development is natural. Harry does struggle a bit with the newer experience of a paternal Severus weighted by the previous years of his antagonism and petty behavior. Severus struggles with balance, Draco struggles with extremes - behavior, feelings, intrusive thoughts - it’s a very well-rounded story. This is your explicit warning: The torture is incredibly graphic, and there are needles involved. If that sets you off, don’t read. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/41198

15. Stay [Danny Phantom]

By jaeger_soul

Dash Baxter is finally a senior and this year isn’t supposed to be hard. With nothing waiting on him after graduation, he might as well sleep through his classes. He’s already got a job after high school’s over, what’s the point of reaching for anything more? He’s fine with what he has. But when ‘more’ comes in the form of a black-haired boy with similar problems to his own, can Dash really not try for it?

Word Count: 817,287

Status: WiP

This is technically a series, since the author has written one companion piece from another character’s perspective for chapter 27 of the story. Oh my god. Dash is a sweet, sweet cinnamon roll who’s just trying to muddle his way through, and terrible things happen to him. This is not Dash the bully from the canon series. The endgame ship is Dash/Danny, and it is very slow-burn. Lots of hurt/comfort in this fic, and the author’s OC’s are incredibly fleshed out and wonderfully developed. Anxiety and panic attacks are pretty heavy in this story. Small town-typical homophobic slurs, make an appearance. Teenagers having sex with other teenagers is a thing. Mentions of abortion and teen pregnancy and unwanted pregnancy all happen later on. Mentions of suicidal thoughts and attempted suicide are plot points. Abusive and abused ex partners. Child abuse - emotional, mental and physical - is the heavy hitter in this story. It is explicit and painful and heartbreaking. Consider this your warning. ABUSE. Explicit, agonizing depictions of trauma, and being used as a bargaining chip between two different but equally terrible parents - if any of that sets you off, DO NOT READ THIS STORY. 

Read here:https://archiveofourown.org/series/646532

16. Under Wing [Harry Potter/Katekyou Hitman Reborn Crossover]

By Reighost

Prophesies were tricky things and lies are even trickier. Sirius’s death becomes a catalyst and Dumbledore’s lies crumple like a house of cards. Harry is left with a burning question... Who is he really? Crossover with Katekyou Hitman Reborn!

Word Count: 145,771

Status: WiP

This story goes hard on the angst right out of the gate. And I do mean hard. Oh my god. A literal mindfuck that will leave you gasping. Psychological manipulation and torture, mind rape, body horror, and non-sexual indecent treatment of a corpse to start with. However, there is a lot of good content in this hurt/comfort fic. The author has not only brought HP and KHR together but has blended elements and characters from Spirited Away, Cardcaptor Sakura and xxxHolic together in such a way that despite all the horror, there’s actually a lot of redeeming charm. You will never find a better interpretation of the Hibari family than the Hibari’s that Reighost writes about in her universes, and this story contains a flashback to the Hibari parents meetcute and it is adorable and hilarious. While this is a wip, it’s at a very good stopping point that’s more or less the end of a story arc - so don’t let the thoughts of a slow wip put you off. This is your warning: Mind-control and mind-control recovery, and gore, all quite explicit. If that sets you off, DO NOT READ. There’s a reason this story is so far down the list. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1123387/chapters/2264363

17. Distorting Equivalency [Fullmetal Alchemist]

By Ranowa Hikura

All Ed knows is that he’s been kidnapped by a madman. 

Word Count: 173,000

Status: Complete

Go hard or go home. This is 27 chapters of kidnapping, explicit torture, and unethical alchemical experimentation with chimeras. All those feelings you have about Nina? Dial it up to eleven (to point out, Tucker and Nina are not featured characters in this story - unfortunately that disaster has already happened). A hurt/comfort fic with a very good resolution. Also becomes eventual Paternal!Roy and Ed. This is your warning: If explicit, repeated torture and body horror set you off, AVOID THIS FIC. 

Read here: https://m.fanfiction.net/s/12116762/1/Distorting-Equivalency#end

18. I’m Not Broken (I Can’t Be) [Homestuck]

By [orphan_account]

Guys don’t get raped. 

Okay, so maybe they do, sometimes. But that’s only when they’re ganged up in an alley way and shoved against a wall and get some other guy’s dick in their ass without permission. It’s forceful and bloody and masculine. At least, that’s how the media sells it.

But this isn’t rape.

When a girl buys you drinks and takes you home and crawls on top of you - well, that’s every guy’s wet dream. 

When she’s grinding down onto you and her hands are holding yours to her breasts and she’s whispering filthy, filthy things into your ear, that’s not rape.

That’s not rape no matter how many times you say no.

Word Count: 33,386

Status: Complete

This is your explicit warning: Rape. The scene is non-graphic (lead-up with fade-to-black scenario) and takes place in the first chapter. Trauma, self-harm, suicidal ideation, destructive behavior, mentions of homophobia. If the summary of this story isn’t enough of a warning, then here you go. DO NOT READ if this is what sets you off. Hurt/comfort and ANGSTANGSTANGST aside, the aspect that I appreciate most about this story is how it deals with trying to come to terms with a trauma you don’t know how to articulate (to yourself or others). I don’t generally do stories that rely on miscommunication, but in this case, it makes sense: it’s less about miscommunication for the sake of plot, and more the lack of ability to articulate effectively, which. Yeah. Dark, angsty hurt/comfort that eventually ends on a positive, hopeful note. PROCEED WITH CAUTION. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/777171/chapters/1462358?view_adult=true

DUN DUN DUN - THE BIG THREE 

Let’s call it a three-way tie, because there is SO MUCH PAIN in each of these stories, honestly I really can’t pick an order for them.

19. Sacrifices Arc [Harry Potter]

By Lightning on the Wave

Harry’s twin Connor is the Boy Who Lived, and Harry is devoted to protecting him by making himself look ordinary. But certain people won’t let Harry stay in the shadows...

Word Count: 3,081,000

Status: Complete

Wrong Boy Who Lived. Severitus, Slytherin!Harry. Drarry. If those are on your radar, this may be the story for you. Just beware literally everything else. Torture, mind-control and manipulation, child abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse, neglect, rape, cannibalism (is it cannibalism when it’s a werewolf eating a human child), trauma, destructive behavior, violent loss of limb, blood, gore, viscera, necromancy - these are just some of the explicit things that take place in the series. There are eight works in the Sacrifices Arc, and they mirror the canon Harry Potter series in that they start at mild and slightly odd and become darker and more horrifying. This is a very, very long series, and it hits a lot of milestones within the HP fandom. There are lovely moments of tenderness, the OC’s are magnificent and well-developed, and while heavy-handed from time to time, the author explores notions of morality and spends a lot of time on magical theory and world-building. If you haven’t read Sacrifices Arc and want more information, google it’s tvtropes page. I would recommend doing so just to determine whether or not the story is safe for you to read if you’re concerned about it, because there is a LOT going on. Otherwise, start with the first story in the series (“Saving Connor”) and proceed with caution. You will absolutely be wrung out before you finish.

Read here: https://m.fanfiction.net/u/895946/

20. Phantom of Truth/Shadow of a Doubt [Danny Phantom]

By HaiJu

Locked away in a secret government lab with Phantom as her subject, nothing stands between Maddie and the truth... except, perhaps, herself.

Word Count: 366,000

Status: Complete

Do you want to get fucking wrecked? Because this series will do it. Holy shit. I still can’t believe I got through it. This is so well-written and so. Fucking. Painful. The first entry in the series, Phantom of Truth, absolutely GOES THERE. The second entry is... everything that comes after. I don’t feel like it spoils anything to tell you that Maddie is not the person who captures Danny Phantom, or that she does not know he’s her son. Make of that what you will. Also, the first story does have a good resolution and does not end on a cliffhanger, so if you need to take a break after, you should. Bonding happens, and I wouldn’t call it Stockholm Syndrome, since it’s between Maddie and Danny, but I also wouldn’t say it doesn’t overlap. This story is absolute fucking angst. Shadow of a Doubt explores not only the traumatic repercussions on Maddie and Danny and their relationship, but on their friends, family, acquaintances and even enemies. There are some very good OC’s that come into play later on. You know, between all the angst and pain. Tread carefully: If you think you’ll be set off by torture and abuse, DO NOT READ THIS FIC. I cannot stress that enough. 

Read here: https://m.fanfiction.net/s/7476808/1/Phantom-of-Truth

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/9683169/1/Shadow-of-a-Doubt

[It’s worth mentioning that HaiJu has an ao3, but they haven’t finished crossposting Shadow of a Doubt to their account]

21. Like One Sundered Star Series [Homestuck]

By oriflamme

Who are these shining like one sundered star? 

[Like kindled lights in untempestuous heaven,

Fair flower-like stars or the iron foam of fight.]

———

Teenage superheroes deal with hormones, mental illness, and extremely secretive guardians in a world of Horrorterrors, giant mutant lucii, mob violence, nightmares of a past life, warring anti-heroes, and asshole carapacians. Sburb AU divergence from Real Men Wear Tights. 

Word Count: 1,712,155

Status: Complete

Welcome to the AU of an AU that did a double reach-around back into canon and became a reincarnation AU. It’s fucking excellent and also fucking traumatic. Body horror, blood and gore and viscera, torture, emotional manipulation, mind control, child abuse, emotional abuse, unhealthy coping mechanisms, attempted suicide/suicidal ideation, codependency, alcohol abuse, just to name a significant few. This is a huge pale-tango clusterfuck and it’s glorious. The world-building is insane. Richly developed OC’s, good use of languages, images that a slowly incorporated into a story of increasing breadth and complexity - and a fucking bombshell that will hit you really, really hard about midway through the story. So much pain. Again, this is another series with a tvtropes page that you should visit if you have any concerns before reading, because there is just that much going on. There are three works in this series, two are companions to the main body of work. Proceed with caution, because this will squeeze the life out of you. 

Read here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/56682

Welp.

[dia-oro]

I just read the new chapter of a Severitus but with hermione as severus child, he just accidentally a cousin of cissa years ago give birth this little know it all and never tell him just give the baby to the muggles, the fanfic is 'He just wanted a scotch.' Of douglette and i love it how the moment severus discover he have a child he just fall, fall in deep of fatherhood and everybody just laugh while severus slow slowly is more than ready to move heavens for hermione to the point he make sure the staff know how harry live with his aunts, heck he make the comment of let harry in his home in summer so he don't suffer abuse by petunia and her brute of husband, heck mcgonagall question is if hermione is still a granger and severus suffer the most mindblowing of his life because he notice he want a solid bond with his kid but also know she still have the granger... he so doomed to love and suck at feelings that its precious.

[inkyarcturus]

I think there’s two ways that Harry could react to this continued mistreatment, implosion or explosion. While I love a good implosion, I think that’s a lil too much angst for the night, so explosion it is >:D (I gave u some fluff at the end)

Harry’s jealousy starts getting the better of him. He starts screaming a lil louder, mouthing off more often, disobeying Severus more.

It starts slow with Harry muttering more insults under his breath, it becomes automatic whenever he sees Severus treating one of the other kiddos.

Then, he starts rolling his eyes, sighing, huffing, nearly stomping like a child whenever Severus does something. He recognizes how infantile it all is but he just can’t seem to stop himself.

Then he starts insulting him in his face, purposefully putting the wrong ingredient in while brewing, turning in poor work, coming in late to class more often than not.

At some point he stops thinking of this as retribution for the pain hes caused/missing Harry’s abuse, or as a way of protecting his friends, and instead starts seeing it as more a desperate cry for help.

A desperate “HEY LOOK AT ME!!! IM BEING A PROBLEM, WILL YOU HELP ME NOW?”

Throughout the entire time, Hermione is watching this unfold with keen eyes. She tries warning Snape, he does not listen.

It gets so bad he starts trying to get Ron and Nev to stop going to the lil check up meetings the Snape has for them throughout the year. He notices how much he’s changed and all it does is make the feelings feel bigger and worse. He is tearing everyone else apart and himself in the process.

Everything comes to a head when Snape catches one of his comments while helping Nev. Snape asked Nev to stay after class to check up on him. They had just got done with a potions class where the two of them partnered up together and their potion exploded, causing them to get harsh burns on their arms. Harry quickly hides that he was affected by the explosion.

Snape only asks Nev to stay after, not Harry. Harry stays anyways, stalling to watch as Snape grabs some burn ointment to help Nev.

“It doesn’t hurt THAT bad, it’s just some burns you don’t have to heal him.”

Fuck.

Snapes head snaps up at him and he glares.

Double fuck.

Harry winces at his own words, still pulling down his sleeves so the burns don’t show. He regrets it as soon as the words come out of his mouth. Cuz he has the same burns as Nev and he knows they hurt like hell, he knows his jealousy is what’s speaking.

Snape looks back at Nev, done applying the burn ointment and sends him off, voice soft. He forces Harry to stay back.

The argument is catastrophic. It includes Harry’s accidental magic going haywire, it includes screaming, crying, attempts at running and too many realizations to count on Snapes side.

While Harry tries to run out of the classroom, Snape grasps at his injured arm, causing him to yelp in pain. It’s the catalyst for Severus’s noticing. He pulls Harry back and pulls his sleeve back, revealing the burn. It’s quiet, it’s still as Severus is forced to confront his own negligence.

Then he moves, quickly as he can accioing a bottle of the burn ointment (a stronger dosage, of course potter was injured worse than Longbottom) he tries his best to calm the wriggling Harry in his grasp, softly shushing him as he puts on the ointment.

Harrys sobbing trying to deny it, screaming his frustrations over why Snape just couldn’t fucking see it dammit, it’s written in his mind, in his body, in his soul.

All the while Severus just continues to softly apologize for it all in hushed tones, continuing to apply the potions, not letting him run and hide from him this time. Because while Harry is right, in a way it was obvious the entire time, his body kept the score, but his brain just couldn’t seem to let anyone see the score board.

And in the end, It is not the best, but it is better. It is a start.

(Something something, Harry ending up on snapes lap sobbing his eyes out and Snape just letting him until he falls asleep, tension gone from his body as he finally feels safe and seen)

Tw: Child abuse

While I don’t envision Harry to be a particularly jealous person in the books, I can’t help but think about certain situations with Severitus where that emotion might come out.

I especially think about it when fanfics depict Severus as a protector for abused children in slytherin or Hogwarts as a whole. I think Harry seeing how Snape treats other children compared to him would enrage him.

Just seeing everything that he could have if things were just a little bit different, if he was sorted into slytherin, or if he just had a different father, or some other insignificant thing, he could have had the love, care and protection he always wanted. He could have had someone on his side who actually fought for him, was willing to do the hard stuff for him.

But he doesn’t just get jealous of how Snape treats other children, he gets jealous of the fact that Snape FINDS OUT about the other children’s abuse. He sees how easily Severus seems to pick up on other kids flinching, hiding injuries, or peculiar behavior, taking them aside after class within the first year, first month of school. Yet, after years of knowing him, Snape seems to have no clue. He sees that and can’t help but think why not him as well, he gets so so angry.

The anger and jealousy doesn’t stick however as he just ends up thinking maybe the way the dursleys treat him isn’t so bad, after all, if the number one person in the school for detecting abuse can’t see it, maybe it’s not actually abuse. And anyways, he should be grateful the other kids have someone to go to.

And somewhere deep down he thinks it’s his fault, because he has gotten rather good at covering up their tracks over the years. How can he blame the Professor when he purposefully hides the evidence?

Anyways hope yall enjoyed this rant :D

[inkyarcturus]

Thank you I really enjoyed writing it!!! I’m so glad you enjoy my ramblings :,D

I always think about how people say “oh they’re just doing that for attention” as a way to devalue (not sure if that’s the right word) what they’re going through

And every time I just wanna scream “IF THEYRE SO DESPERATE FOR ATTENTION THAT THEYRE WILLING TO DO THAT? GIVE SOME TO THEM?-“ especially when it comes to kids!

The only thing babies know is to cry when they need help, they rely on the people around them entirely. When it comes to kids, toddlers, even teens in a lot of cases, you need to teach them how to healthily and responsibly deal with their emotions. That is not something they naturally know, it is something that is taught to them based on the people around them.

(Mini rant over)

Anyways after this scene, Harry continues to lash out, but Severus has already learned what that means for Harry. He recognizes that when he’s feeling the most vulnerable, the most invisible, the most left out, is when he lashes out.

Every time after Harry subconsciously does it, Severus takes a breath to stop his own anger from over flowing and pulls him aside.

Just a stern, “why are you acting like this right now?”, has Harry responding with anger, but he runs out of energy when he sees Snape looking at him softly, like with his other kids, like with his slytherins and Ron and Nev. he is his as well. it’s always enough to get him to stop.

Of course, occasionally Harry will say something that he doesn’t mean, or something that he only THINKS he means, that genuinely hurts Severus and Snape snaps (ha!), but they eventually get to the point where he recognizes that his reactions are less of an action w/ unknown or “bad” reasons, and more of an “I don’t want to tell you/ I don’t know HOW to tell you.” action his body developed as a coping mechanism.

I imagine as he’s a little older, the insults and such stops, but he does try to keep secrets, some part of him still seeing safety in the act.

Tw: Child abuse

While I don’t envision Harry to be a particularly jealous person in the books, I can’t help but think about certain situations with Severitus where that emotion might come out.

I especially think about it when fanfics depict Severus as a protector for abused children in slytherin or Hogwarts as a whole. I think Harry seeing how Snape treats other children compared to him would enrage him.

Just seeing everything that he could have if things were just a little bit different, if he was sorted into slytherin, or if he just had a different father, or some other insignificant thing, he could have had the love, care and protection he always wanted. He could have had someone on his side who actually fought for him, was willing to do the hard stuff for him.

But he doesn’t just get jealous of how Snape treats other children, he gets jealous of the fact that Snape FINDS OUT about the other children’s abuse. He sees how easily Severus seems to pick up on other kids flinching, hiding injuries, or peculiar behavior, taking them aside after class within the first year, first month of school. Yet, after years of knowing him, Snape seems to have no clue. He sees that and can’t help but think why not him as well, he gets so so angry.

The anger and jealousy doesn’t stick however as he just ends up thinking maybe the way the dursleys treat him isn’t so bad, after all, if the number one person in the school for detecting abuse can’t see it, maybe it’s not actually abuse. And anyways, he should be grateful the other kids have someone to go to.

And somewhere deep down he thinks it’s his fault, because he has gotten rather good at covering up their tracks over the years. How can he blame the Professor when he purposefully hides the evidence?

Anyways hope yall enjoyed this rant :D

[marriso1]

I JUST READ THROUGH THIS AND IT WAS AMAZING?????????

“His body kept the score, but his brains couldn’t seem to let anyone see the score board.” Honestly the best way to describe such a dilemma in the given situation. (Heartbreaking word usage though)

Thank you so so so so much for writing this. This had played out exactly the way i had expected it too and more. I feel like children acting out to express themselves or as a cry for help isn’t talked about as much as it should be and you had handled it perfectly. After all, in many abusive household cases, and specifically to harry, it is much easier to lash out than to ask for help. In the end, one of those options will have a bigger impact on Harry’s life. Would asking end in him getting the support he needs or end in him never believing in being saved or hope in its own concept? Lashing out seems like the better choice because if he doesn’t know why he’s doing it there’s always an option to turn back or for pin it on something else.

me after reading

Tw: Child abuse

While I don’t envision Harry to be a particularly jealous person in the books, I can’t help but think about certain situations with Severitus where that emotion might come out.

I especially think about it when fanfics depict Severus as a protector for abused children in slytherin or Hogwarts as a whole. I think Harry seeing how Snape treats other children compared to him would enrage him.

Just seeing everything that he could have if things were just a little bit different, if he was sorted into slytherin, or if he just had a different father, or some other insignificant thing, he could have had the love, care and protection he always wanted. He could have had someone on his side who actually fought for him, was willing to do the hard stuff for him.

But he doesn’t just get jealous of how Snape treats other children, he gets jealous of the fact that Snape FINDS OUT about the other children’s abuse. He sees how easily Severus seems to pick up on other kids flinching, hiding injuries, or peculiar behavior, taking them aside after class within the first year, first month of school. Yet, after years of knowing him, Snape seems to have no clue. He sees that and can’t help but think why not him as well, he gets so so angry.

The anger and jealousy doesn’t stick however as he just ends up thinking maybe the way the dursleys treat him isn’t so bad, after all, if the number one person in the school for detecting abuse can’t see it, maybe it’s not actually abuse. And anyways, he should be grateful the other kids have someone to go to.

And somewhere deep down he thinks it’s his fault, because he has gotten rather good at covering up their tracks over the years. How can he blame the Professor when he purposefully hides the evidence?

Anyways hope yall enjoyed this rant :D