femchef

[femchef]

Because I can’t help myself, here’s what I put in the cookie box this year:

Red Currant Rugelach:

Coffee, Cardamom and Coconut Cookies:

Classic Chocolate Chips:

Chewy Lemon, Poppyseed and Pistachio Cookies:

Almond Horns with Spiced Marzipan Centers:

aaannnnnddd Pecan Pralines:

[femchef]

Okay but why do all my tortiecats hate the doorbell though???

[baby girls who taught you to growl at the door it sure as hell wasn’t me]

[femchef]

I fully understand why "character A is astounded at the sight of character B's penis" is a specific kink that gets tagged for, but the fact that some platforms choose to tag this kink as "penis awe" is unintentionally very funny. Now I'm picturing penis experience kink tags for all those other allegedly transcendent emotions in the glossary of your Philosophy 101 textbook. Penis faith. Penis Weltschmerz. Penis apprehension of the absurd.

[femchef]

Reblog to unleash this cat on your mutuals

[femchef]

Chinese artist Shou Xin creates the most wonderful cats with just a few pencil lines

[femchef]

[femchef]

I love the use of the phrase 'some strange alchemy' as a descriptor for a process you don't understand.

'Through some strange alchemy(crochet) they turned a bundle of yarn into a stuffed giraffe'

'Through some strange alchemy(bad cooking) they turned a perfectly marinated steak into a charcoal briquet'

'Through some strange alchemy(good cooking) they turned a pile of slop into the fluffiest bread loaf I'd ever seen'

'Through some strange alchemy(bad reading comprehension) they took my polite statement and turned into a disgusting act against the poor'

and so on

[femchef]

imagine if your boyfriend was like I can smell an ant. and started tracking

[femchef]

this is why my strongest medium is text

[femchef]

Vampire party. Found this one in my older art folders.

[femchef]

[femchef]

The Cave at midnight. Cut to Tim, dry-scooping espresso powder straight out of the bottle without looking away from his laptop.

—

Kon, holding the phone closer to his ear and ducking into a closet: so you’re saying Bruce doesn’t do this?

Clark, on the other end of the line: not really. I mean, he drinks coffee sometimes. I’ve actually never counted how many cups he—

Kon: so I just give him more water, right? to dilute it?

Clark: …that sounds right?

[femchef]

we need more divorcebaiting. how strongly can canon imply (without technically outright stating) that these two characters are bitterly, acrimoniously divorced? essential we explore this

[femchef]

Seems to be bunny in the trough Thursday

[femchef]

Jewish silk producer, Uzbekistan, 1880s