#don't ask me where i've been or if i'm staying :)

[loveesiren]

Help Me (Pt. 2)

Rafe Cameron x Maybank!Reader

Synopsis: Rafe and Y/n admit their feelings for eachother.

Warnings: Fluff, language, mention of sex trafficking, mention of drugging

Word Count: 2.7k+

You opened your eyes to a dimly lit room you didn't recognize. Holding your breath as you scanned the room slowly, trying to remember what the fuck had happened. You weren't in a hospital. You definitely weren't in your room, or any bedroom on the Cut for that matter. The ceilings were high, the bed way larger and softer than your own. Your eyes made way to the chair beside you. You jumped slightly at the sight of someone sitting there but quickly realized it was Rafe.

He leaned back in the chair, gripping a pillow as he snored lightly. "What the fu-ahh!" You hissed as you tried to sit up, falling back down as a searing pain ripped through your core. "Fuck!"

Rafe heard you and woke up immediately. He was instantly by your side. "Y/N, you're up!" His voice was almost child like.

"Where am I Rafe?" You ask as you put pressure on the pain in your side.

"Tanneyhill," He responded. "My house."

"What? Why? What's going on?"

"Just rest for a second. Let me get you some water." He says, taking a glass from the bed side table and going to the bathroom sink to fill it.

You sit up slightly, leaning back against the pillow. You were starting to feel more pain running through the rest of your body. You ran your fingers over your face and traced the stitches that wrapped around your right temple. You pressed lightly on your cheek and winced as you felt the bruising there.

"Here," Rafe said, handing you the glass of water.

"Thanks," You say before chugging as much water as you possibly could, not realizing how thirsty you were.

Rafe stared at you intently. There was a sadness in his eyes. Pain, like just looking at you caused him physical ailment.

"I'm guessing my dad did this to me?" You ask softly, more of a statement than a question.

You could see a tear fall from Rafe's eye but he quickly tried to wipe it away as he nodded his response.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N..." Rafe's voice cracked.

"It's not your fault my dad's a dick, Rafe."

"I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. I'm sorry for how I treated you the last few days. I'm sorry for what happened with JJ. You didn't deserve the way I treated you and neither did he. You're the only person who has ever really cared and that scared me and I-"

"Rafe," You cut him off. You offer a slight chuckle. "It's okay. I forgive you."

"You do?" He sniffled, looking up to meet your eyes.

"Yeah, I do. People make mistakes. And, I'm not sure what exactly happened but it's obvious you've helped me considering I woke up in your house to you sleeping beside me."

Rafe smiled, relief washing over his face. You reached out and took his hand, rubbing your thumb over his knuckles.

"You're a good guy, Rafe. I've been able to see that since the beginning."

"I don't know about that," He chuckles. "But I do know I'd do anything for you."

You smiled softly up at him. His blue eyes glistened behind his remaining tears. Strands of his messy hair fell in his face. He was quite literally the most beautiful thing you'd ever seen.

You caught yourself staring and quickly changed the subject. "So, uhm, where's my brother?"

"He went to take care of some things." Rafe said, his demeanor changed with his sentence.

You squinted your eyes and bit your lip. "What things, Rafe?"

"Look, Y/N-"

"Rafe, tell me where my brother is."

Rafe sighs. "Your dad did something really fucked up. You're not safe right now. That's why we brought you here. JJ is trying to fix it."

You started to feel panic rise in your chest. JJ was impulsive. You didn't want him getting himself into trouble.

"I've gotta find him," You say as you pull the covers back and try to get out of the bed. You felt a sharp pain in your ankle and you were instantly on the floor. "Ah, fuck!" You cry out.

"Y/N, baby, no. You have to stay in bed. You need rest!" Rafe said as he scooped you off the floor.

Feeling his arms around you calmed you down. He was strong, really strong, but gentle. His skin was soft and warm. And his scent, oh God, his scent. He smelled like the ocean after a tropical storm, hints of lavender and eucalyptus. You realized you'd never been this close to him before.

"Listen, we can call JJ right now, okay?" He promises.

"Yeah, okay..." You said as he helped you get situated back in the bed.

"Just relax." He told you as he pulled out his phone a dialed JJ's number.

"Dude, hey..." Rafe began. "Yeah, she's awake...yep, yep she's fine." He said as he smiled at you.

"Let me talk to him," You demanded as you held your hand out for the phone.

"Yeah, here she is." Rafe said before handing the phone to you.

Y/N: JJ? What the fuck happened? Where are you?

JJ: Look, Y/N, I have some shit to take care of. I need you to stay at Tanneyhill.

Y/N: You need to tell me what you're doing. Why am I not safe? I need to know what's happening.

JJ: I'll explain later. I love you, okay? Just stay with Rafe.

He quickly hung up the phone. You could hear he was with the others. His lack of explanation formed a ball of nerves in your stomach.

You sighed and handed the phone back to Rafe. You knew if JJ had willingly left you alone with Rafe Cameron, something big was going on.

"Rafe..."

"Yeah?" He asked softly, knowing what was coming next.

"What did my dad do?" Your voice was shaky. Your dad had done a lot of fucked up shit but you could tell this was something much worse.

Rafe fiddled with his hands, unsure of how to get the words out. "He uhm..."

"Look, Rafe, it's obvious he beat the shit out of me. But what the hell is going on that I am being kept in your house for? I mean, no offense, you're great, but JJ would never have left me here if there wasn't something bigger going on."

"Okay, okay." Rafe said. "Your dad, uh, he drugged you. You've been out for like a day and a half..."

"Okay..." You said, waiting for him to continue. You knew there was something else.

"He, uh, h-he was trying to sell you, Y/N." Rafe's voice cracked.

Your jaw dropped. "S-sell me? Like...to traffickers?"

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. And I-I don't know if these guys are still looking for you or what, all I know is I have the house locked up tight and JJ and the others are trying to sort this out."

You looked down at your hands, trying to hide the inevitable tears. You knew your dad was trash. You always had. But you just couldn't believe he went this far. Selling you. His own daughter. He really, really, couldn't care less about you.

You brought your knees to your chest and hugged them tightly, hiding your face as you let the sobs escape your lips.

Rafe was silent as he crawled beside you in the bed and wrapped his arms around you. You leaned into him and clung to his arms as you let it all out.

"Shh, shhh, I know baby, I'm so sorry," He soothed as he rubbed your back.

"W-what am I gonna do, Rafe? I-I can't go home." You sobbed.

"You can stay here," Rafe said. "As long as you need."

"No, Rafe, I can't do that."

"Shhh, yes you can. There is plenty of space. JJ already got all your things."

You just sat and whimpered in Rafe's arms. He held you for what felt like hours until you finally stopped crying. You pulled away slightly and looked into his eyes. "Thank you," You whispered.

He gave you a small smile and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. "You know I'll always take care of you."

You smiled back at him. Your eyes flickered from his to his lips. The urge to kiss this sweet boy in front of you was undeniable.

"Uhm," You pulled away uncomfortably. "Could I like, take a bath or something? I feel really gross." You chuckle.

"Yeah, of course. I'll run it for you."

Rafe headed towards the bathroom. You heard the water begin to run and you rested your face in your hands. There was no denying the fact that you liked Rafe. You liked him a lot. But you just don't see how this could work. You were from the Cut and just being in his house made you feel so small and meaningless. You were sure his parents would kick you out the second they laid eyes on your broken body.

"Tangerine or grapefruit?" Rafe's voice took you from your train of thought.

"What?" You asked, looking over at him.

"Bubbles," He smiled, holding up two bottles of soap.

You laughed. "Uhm, grapefruit, I guess."

He smiled and returned to the bathroom.

You slowly made your way out of the bed and limped towards the bathroom. Your ankle was definitely sprained. You fell again. "Shit."

"Here, let me help you." Rafe said as he helped you off the floor and to the bathroom.

He sat you on the edge of the tub and you tried to catch your breath. You felt like you'd just run a marathon even though you had only taken a couple steps.

You began to remove your shirt from your body.

"Uhhh," Rafe mumbled as he turned around.

"Rafe," You start. "Look, I don't care if you see me naked. I-I need your help."

Asking for help was not something you did but your body was so weak.

Rafe turned to look at you. "Okay, I got you." He helped you out of your shirt and pants, placing you into the warm water.

He'd always admired your body. Seeing you naked was something he though about often but not like this. Large bruises covered your torso. Little cuts all over your body and dried blood surrounding your stitches. The fact that your beautiful body had been violated killed him.

"Oh, that feels so good." You sigh, closing your eyes as you sink down into the water.

Rafe smiles as he sits on the floor beside you. "Can I get you anything?"

You shake your head. "No, this is perfect." You say with a smile. "Thank you,"

"For what?"

"For taking care of me. I don't really like counting on others. And I'm not sure exactly what's happening but I know JJ wouldn't leave me here with you if it wasn't something important."

Rafe nods. "Do you think I could ever get JJ to like me?"

You laugh. "I don't know. He's stubborn as shit."

"He loves you so much," Rafe said.

You smile. "Yeah, I fucking love that kid too. Even though he's a fucking dumbass." You laugh.

Rafe smiles and looks down at his hands. You reach out and offer your bubbly hand to his. He takes it, rubbing lightly over the bruising that coated your skin.

"You're so beautiful." He whispers as he stares at you.

"Really? My head is split open." You laugh.

He leans in closer to you. "You're beautiful, no matter what Y/N."

You look him in the eyes, bringing your hand up to frame his cheek as he leans in and presses a soft kiss to your lips.

You smiled against his lips. He was so gentle. So careful not to hurt you. But you could feel the need. How much he wanted you.

"Y/N!"

Rafe pulled away from you as he heard JJ enter the house.

"Fuck, go!" You told him.

Rafe rushed out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He met JJ and the others on the stairs.

"Where is she?" JJ asks.

"She's taking a bath. She's fine." Rafe promised.

JJ still pushed passed him and headed to the bathroom in the guest room. "Y/N?" He asked, knocking on the door.

"I'll be out in a minute, JJ!" You said. "Could you ask Sarah and Kie to come in here please?"

You really wanted Rafe but you know JJ would lose his mind if he knew Rafe saw you naked.

"Hey," Kie said softly as her and Sarah entered the room.

"Hey guys, I'm sorry. Could you help me out?"

"Of course," Sarah said. The two girls were quickly by your side. Helping you out of the tub and drying you off.

They helped you into your clothes and took you back to the bed. Everyone was standing in your room.

"Hey, everyone." You said as you laid back down into the bed.

"Hey! How are you feeling?" JJ asked as he ran to you, pushing your hair out of your face.

"I'm good, J." You smiled. You glanced around the room. "Uhh, thank you all for everything. But could I have a minute with my brother?"

Everyone nodded and made their way out of the room. Rafe's eyes lingered on you for a moment and you offered him a small smile.

You turned to JJ. His eyes filled with tears.

"JJ, I'm fine, I promise."

He shook his head. "I'm so sorry I let this happen. I should have gone home with you."

"J, it's not your fault dad is a prick." You tell him, taking his hand in yours.

"I'll get a second job. I'll find us a place to live. I took care of dad. He's not on the island anymore. You're safe. I'll always make sure you're safe."

You didn't want to know what happened to your dad and quite frankly, you didn't care.

"JJ, listen to me," You said, forcing him to look you in the eyes. "Rafe said I can stay here for a while."

"No-"

"JJ!" You yelled, making him focus again. "I love you so much. More than anything, okay?"

JJ nodded.

"I like Rafe. He's really good to me. I'm going to stay here for a while. With him. While I heal."

JJ clenched his jaw. Hating the fact that you were involved with Rafe.

"Can you please try to get along with him?"

JJ looked down but nodded in agreement. "Okay. Fine. But if he hurts you-"

"JJ, he's not going to hurt me. I'm a big girl, I can make my own choices."

"I love you," JJ says.

"I love you, too J." You smile up at him. "Now go have fun with your friends. I'm going to get some rest."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Just, uh, tell Rafe to come back please."

JJ closes his eyes and bites his lip. Not enthused at all that you like Rafe. But he nods his head and heads for the door.

"Rafe," You hear him say as he opens the door. "Listen to me," You hear JJ as he pulls Rafe to the side. "If you ever do anything to hurt my sister, I'll hang your body from a fucking hook in my basement."

"I'll never hurt her, JJ." Rafe promised.

You chuckled at their exchange.

Rafe finally comes in the room, leaving the door open behind him.

"Hey, pretty girl," Rafe says as he sits next to you. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm sleepy." You admit. "Will you lay with me?"

Rafe smiles and nods, getting under the covers next to you and wrapping his arms around you lightly. You nuzzled into his chest as he ran his fingers over your skin.

JJ watched for a moment as you snuggled closer to Rafe. As much as he hated it, he swallowed his thoughts and walked off to meet the rest of the Pogues in the kitchen. All that mattered is that you were happy and safe.

_________

"You okay, JJ?" Kiara asks as he enter the kitchen.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm just glad we got this all sorted out."

"Is she sleeping?" Sarah asked.

JJ chuckled. "Yeeeup. With Rafe." He pressed his knuckles against the counter.

"JJ, I know you hate my brother. I fucking hate him too sometimes." Sarah laughs. "But, I've never seen him so distraught over anyone before. Rafe takes care of what he loves. And if he loves Y/N, she's in good hands."

JJ nods and offers Sarah a smile. "Guess I'll just have to get used to it. I want her to be happy."

"Come on," John B says, placing his hands on JJ's shoulders. "Let's go have a beer."

______

"I think your brother might actually murder me for holding you like this." Rafe whispered in your ear.

You giggled. "Don't worry, JJ knows I could kick his ass if he tried anything."

Rafe smiles against your shoulder. "Does it hurt?" He whispers, running his finger over the bruises on your arms.

"Yes," You admit. "But you make it better." You look up to meet Rafe's gaze.

He smiles down at you, tucking your hair behind your ear. "Can we finish what we started earlier?" He asks nervously.

You smile. "Yes please," You wrap your hand around his neck, allowing your fingers to graze his dirty blonde locks as you pull his lips to yours.

[makeitmingi]

When Flowers Bloom In The Dark [Chapter 7]

Genre: Romance, Mafia!AU, Violence, Angst, Slow burn

Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Florist!Reader, Mafioso!Hongjoong, Mafioso!Seonghwa, Mafioso!Yunho, Mafioso!Yeosang, Mafioso!San, Mafioso!Mingi, Mafioso!Wooyoung, Mafioso!Jongho

Summary: When you appeared and wept at his mother's funeral, Hongjoong found himself wanting to find out more about you. A regular girl, who owns a flower shop in his territory and has a relationship with the mother that he hasn't spoken to in years, why hasn't he ever noticed you before?

[Warning(s): 18+ for violence, use of weapons, smoking, alcohol consumption, slight gore, gang affiliation, tattoos and character deaths. Minors DNI. This is a work of fiction and does not represent the Ateez members in real life.]

Word count: 3.2K

Chapter warning(s): Y/n gets accosted twice, "panic" attack (she shuts down)

"Oh! Sorry, I thought you were someone else, you sounded like him." You blinked at the stranger. The guy laughed and shook his head, a drink in his hand. Between him and the bar counter, you suddenly felt very cornered and uncomfortable.

"I was wondering if I could buy you a drink?" He asked with a smile.

"No, thank you. I bought my own drink." You shook your glass with your drink, trying to slink away but with so many people crowding the bar, it was difficult.

"Ah, looks like I was too slow then. Can I at least have a drink with you then?" He laughed, trying to be nice.

"I really should be getting back to my friends. They are looking for me." You tried to go past him but he grasped your wrist tightly.

"You know, I tried being nice. It's not nice to be so unfriendly in a place like this." He chided, his tone suddenly changing. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Do you expect me to be honoured then? Doesn't mean you make advances means I have to accept them." You couldn't bite your tongue.

"You-" He was about to say something.

"(y/n), I've been looking for you." Now it was a familiar voice. You turned to Jihoon with a soft sigh of relief. Jihoon immediately wrapped his arm around you, pulling you to his side, glowering at the man who had let your wrist go. Looking up, you saw Hyunwoo standing there too.

"Got a problem here?" Hyunwoo raised an eyebrow. With his muscles, it was normal for the guy to be intimidated by him. You merely looked away, not saying anything.

"Let's go." Jihoon threw a last dirty look at the guy and escorted you back to the table.

"Are you okay?" He looked down at you with a frown.

"I'm fine, Jihoon. Don't worry, you and Hyunwoo came at the right time. Thank you." You smiled softly. He nodded with a hum and you went to sit down.

"I'm going to find Nana and Eve. We should go." Hyunwoo said, leaving before you could protest.

"No, it's fine! You guys should stay and enjoy yourselves. I think I'll go home." You told Jihoon, you felt bad that they had to leave.

"You shouldn't leave on your own. I'll take you home." Jihoon shook his head.

"The exit is just there. Really, I'll be okay, I'm sober to make it home on my own. Make sure Nana and Eve get home safely, hmm?" You squeezed his hand. Jihoon knew you were stubborn and reluctantly agreed. You wrapped an arm around him to hug him.

"Text me when you get home." He whispered.

"I will. Let me know when you guys are home too. And send me my portion of the bill." You hummed and grabbed your bag, heading to the exit.

"Thank you." You smiled to the bouncer who opened the velvet rope for you. He gave a nod in reply as you made your way out.

"Hey!" You were suddenly yanked away, causing you stumble. You came face to face with the man earlier.

"Oh, so where are your two friends, huh? They just left you on your own?" He sneered, getting close to your face. You leaned back as he was invading your space.

"Do you not know when to give up?" You tried to break free of his grip. You shoved him back, causing him to let go of your hand.

"You're going to pay for that. And for embarrassing me earlier." He growled.

"Leave me alone and maybe I won't go to the police." You glared at him. You were tired of arguing with him, you wanted to go home and he was seriously getting on your last nerve. But he shoved you against the wall harshly, making you let out a groan as the pain stunned your momentarily.

"I think that's enough." A voice entered and the man was grabbed by the collar, yanked back, away from you. You let out a shaky breath as a suit-clad body stood in front of you.

"H-Hongjoong..." You said shakily, looking at the back of his head. He didn't turn to look at you.

"I've watched you from earlier. You just don't know when to give up. Why don't I give you a taste of your own medicine?" He chuckled.

"H-Hey man. I was just fooling around, I'm sorry." The man took a step back in fear. Hongjoong merely laughed again before he stopped and punched the guy.

"Hongjoong!" You gasped in shock but he was not stopping, raining down punches on the man.

"Hongjoong, stop." You tried to call him.

At that point, it wasn't about saving you anymore. Hongjoong felt so much blind rage and he just couldn't stop. This man just appeared at the wrong place, at the wrong time and became the object for Hongjoong to vent his anger.

"Please." You sat on the ground, covering your ears and shutting your eyes. You were so stunned, you couldn't bring yourself to get up and leave the place.

"What's going on here?" Seonghwa came out, witnessing the scene in front of him.

"Hongjoong, what did you do?" He asked. That snapped Hongjoong out of it. He looked down at the guy's face that was bloodied.

"Shit..." He turned to see you absolutely horrified and terrified. Seonghwa frowned, unsure of what to do now. Luckily, Yunho was quick to go to your side.

"Hey, (y/n). It's me, Yunho." He gently removed your hands from your ears so you could hear him.

"Y-Yunho sshi." You stuttered, unable to breathe. Luckily, Yunho used his body to block your view. He smiled softly.

"Breathe. Let's go." He spoke softly, helping you to your feet. Your legs were so wobbly, you leaned on him, letting him guide you to wherever it was, as long as you were no longer here.

"Here." Once again, he led you up the stairs and brought you to an empty room. You figured it could be a place for VIPs to sit and drink but with all the lights on, it just looked like a regular room with couches. He grabbed a blanket from the basket and put it around you, hopefully it'll bring you some comfort.

"Let me go get you some water. Breathe, it's okay." He said. You nodded slowly, not being able to tell him you wanted him to stay.

"Be right back." He stood up and left the room to get water.

"Yun, what's happening?" Mingi asked his best friend, having bumped into him as he left the room you were in. As he walked to get you water, Yunho filled Mingi in on what happened.

"Damn... So where's the girl now?" Mingi questioned.

"In the room I came from. I left Seonghwa hyung with Hongjoong hyung. I think they'll need a clean up crew." Yunho said.

"On it." Mingi took his phone out and texted for a clean up crew. When Yunho retrieved a cold bottle of water for you, the two went back upstairs.

"I'll go let the others know what happened." Mingi said and parted ways with Yunho, who went back to you.

"I'm so sorry, Yunho sshi. This is all my fault, Hongjoong sshi was just trying to help me. If the owner asks what happened, just tell them it was all me. I didn't mean to cause trouble." You told the male the moment he entered the room.

"(y/n) sshi, it's not your fault, you didn't cause any trouble. And don't worry about Hongjoong hyung. He won't get in trouble with the owner." Yunho assured, opening the bottle for you.

"You're sure?" You asked, gulping the cold water.

"Seeing as to how he's the owner, I'm sure he'll be fine." Yunho tried to joke. Your jaw slacked slightly in surprise.

"So don't worry about him. Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?" Yunho questioned. You shook your head, hands shaking slightly as you clutched the blanket.

"It could be the adrenaline, that's why you don't feel any pain even if you are injured." He said.

"I-Is Hongjoong okay?" You finally asked.

Yunho was surprised by your question. He thought after what you witnessed, you would have asked whether the other guy was okay. If you did, Yunho wouldn't know how to answer that, he didn't know if the guy made it out alive. Maybe the realisation of what actually happened hasn't sunken in for you yet.

"Feel better?" Seonghwa asked, the smoking cigarette between his fingers. Hongjoong blinked then shrugged, it did feel good to vent his emotions out.

"Should have just went to the fight club." He shot his best friend a small smile.

"Clean up crew is coming. We should head in." Seonghwa said and Hongjoong nodded, standing straight and heading in with him.

"Where's (y/n)?" Hongjoong asked.

"Yunho brought her to one of the rooms to calm her down. Mingi's the one that called clean up." Seonghwa informed, walking up the stairs with his hands tucked into his pockets.

"I should find (y/n) and talk to her." Hongjoong said as Seonghwa opened the door to the VIP room that the others were in.

"Hyung, are you okay?" San stood up.

"I'm fine. I can't say the same for the other guy though." Hongjoong nodded his head, taking the glass of whiskey Wooyoung offered to him and took a sip. The other guys all had had relieved looks on their faces while some even laughed.

"Let me go find (y/n)." Hongjoong turned to the door and almost bumped into Yunho, who was entering the room.

"(y/n)'s looking for you..." Yunho informed. At Yunho's words, the rest of the people in the room, including Hongjoong, had surprised looks on their faces.

"She is?" Hongjoong blinked. Yunho nodded and held the door open for him, pointing to where you were.

"(y/n) sshi? Can I come in?" Hongjoong knocked. He heard the soft hum from you and entered, closing the door behind him.

"Are you alright?" He asked softly, approaching your huddled form.

"I-I'm fine. But Yunho sshi thinks it could be a-adrenaline." You tried to look okay but Hongjoong could see how much you were trembling. He sat by you, where Yunho sat earlier.

"Drink this. It'll help." He held out the whiskey glass from his hand. With two shaky hands, you received the crystal glass and carefully took a sip. You winced at the burn and bitterness that hit your tongue. Hongjoong thought you were going to hand it back to him but you suddenly gulped the rest down.

"Woah, slow down." Taking the glass from you, he gave you the bottle of water from the table.

"What about y-you? Are you okay? W-Were you hurt?" You asked with a gulp, eyes trailing to the bruises on his knuckles. Hongjoong nodded his head.

"You are hurt." Hongjoong caught sight of your bruised wrist as you capped the waterbottle. You blinked and looked at your wrist.

"Oh." You looked at it.

"Hang on." Standing up, Hongjoong went to the door and yelled out for someone to get him a first aid kit. You couldn't see who it was but Hongjoong took the first aid kit from someone and returned to you.

"It's just a bruise..." You whispered. Hongjoong placed the first aid box on the table and opened it.

"I guess I wish I had the balm you made." Hongjoong tried to joke about small pot of homemade balm that you had given him.

"Y-You still have it with you?" You couldn't help your curiosity. Hongjoong hummed, his ears turning red. He held his hand out for you to show him your wrist. He was gently in applying a regular ointment over your wrist and wrapping it so it wouldn't smudge.

"Thank you, Hongjoong sshi." You said softly, looking at the bandage he tried his best to wrap neatly.

"No problem. It's the least I could do since you were injured in my establishment." Hongjoong replied, keeping the first aid stuff back into the box.

"It's okay, it's not your fault..." You murmured.

"I think I should go home now." You stood up and nearly fell over, feeling the throb in your ankle.

"Woah, careful." Hongjoong caught you, resulting in you leaning against his body, your face pressed into his chest. You winced as you tried to stand back up.

"Where are you hurt?" Hongjoong frowned with worry.

"It's fine. It's just my ankle." You tried your best to hide the pain but Hongjoong could see the grimace of pain.

"No, it's not fine. Let me get it checked out. Or at least sit down and ice it for a bit before you go." He insisted with a small frown. You chewed on your bottom lip. Being here was slowly making you feel more stressed and anxious, right now you just wanted to get out of here and go home.

"Hongjoong sshi. Please... I just want to go home." Tears filled your eyes. You couldn't control the way they fell down your face, they were not stopping.

"Alright, I'll take you home." He whispered, suddenly feeling a tightness in his chest from guilt as he watched you cry.

"Come on." Putting your arm around his shoulders, he helped you out of the room and down the stairs.

"Boss." The workers bowed to him as you passed them but he didn't acknowledge them. He led you to the VIP entrance in the back where the car was already waiting for you.

"Mr Kim." The driver opened the door for both of you. Hongjoong helped you in and removed his jacket, draping it over your lap.

"Hongjoong hyung." Yeosang called out to him just as he closed the door.

"I'm taking her home." Hongjoong informed. The 7 of them nodded and Hongjoong entered the other side to sit with you. You wiped your remaining tears with your hands, sniffling slightly.

Thankfully, Hongjoong didn't talk to you the rest of the trip home. You were so tired but your mind was racing. Whatever happened tonight has never happened to you before, you didn't know what to do and how to react.

"(y/n) sshi... We're here." His voice made you jump slightly. You blinked and looked up, seeing that you were indeed outside your apartment building.

"Oh... Thanks." You removed his jacket from your lap and got out of the car, standing on both legs.

"Let me escort you up, at least." Hongjoong came out from his side of the car.

"N-No, it's okay. I'd rather go up on my own." You shook your head. Hongjoong sighed and nodded his head, realising that he might be pushing you too much.

"Look, (y/n) sshi. I'm sorry about tonight and-"

"If it's okay with you, I would not like to think or revisit what happened tonight." You cut him off with a polite smile.

"Right..." He nodded. You cleared your throat and bowed gratefully to him before limping into your apartment building. Hongjoong stood there, making sure you went in safely before going into the car.

You entered your apartment and made sure to lock the door, leaning against the front door with a sigh. The first thing you did was text your friends that you were home. They may give you hell for texting them so late but you knew that they were just good friends and worried about you.

"Oh god..." You covered your mouth as you started to remember what happened tonight.

"What have I gotten myself into?" You asked yourself in disbelief. Did Mrs Kim know about Hongjoong and not tell you? Was there an underlying motive in getting to know you?

But what would Mrs Kim or Hongjoong want with you?

"No, no. Maybe she didn't know." You shook your head. Give wanted to give Mrs Kim the benefit of doubt.

"My son, he can be short tempered but underneath, he's just trying to protect everyone that he loves." Mrs Kim smiled softly as you poured more tea for her.

"He's a good son then." You hummed.

"He is. Even if I have a lot of faults and haven't been the best mother to him, he grew up to be a good man." She said.

"I hope you two can reconcile soon. It seems like you had a good relationship." You reached over to hold her hand. Mrs Kim merely shot you a sad smile that showed she thought otherwise.

"Maybe." Was all she said.

Hongjoong stood by his office window, staring out into the night sky. He sipped the whiskey from his glass, a soft sigh escaping him. As the leader of Ateez, he was never really open with his feelings. He didn't really like to feel vulnerable around anyone.

"You've been keeping everything in. So I guess it could have happened at any time when all your feelings come pouring out." Seonghwa said, sitting on the couch.

"It's annoying." Hongjoong sighed.

"Well, you're human, Joong. Even if you don't like your feelings, they'll always be there." Seonghwa chuckled.

"I don't even know her. But whenever she's around, I feel so conflicted. I'm angry and a part of me wants to resent her but I also want to talk to her." Hongjoong turned away from the window.

"Because whether you want to admit it or not, you want to know more about your mother." Seonghwa pointed out.

"This is so unnecessary, I don't need this." He groaned.

"But it is what it is. If you were to sit with her and learn more about your mother, can you say for certain that you'll be able to control your emotions?" Seonghwa asked.

"No. The mere mention of my mother by her makes me so..." Hongjoong clenched his fists.

"I'm not ready to hear what a wonderful person my mother was." He said bitterly.

"Then stay away until you are. Don't forget, it's not just about you. She has to be ready to hear your side too. To hear what your mother did to you and what your relationship was like." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong nodded glumly, that was another thing he didn't want to bring to the surface again.

"Look, after tonight, give her space to breathe. We just have to focus on other work for now, Ateez needs you." Seonghwa squeezed Hongjoong's shoulder.

"Mmm, I know. Thanks for holding down the fort, Seonghwa ah." Hongjoong shot his friend a smile.

"Of course. We're all behind you, supporting you, Joong." The taller hummed.

"She's not from our world, our normal is not her normal. And the less people in our world, the better." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong agreed, they've become so desensitised to violence and death.

"I'm worried that my mother's relationship with her has pulled her into our world, whether she wants it or not." Hongjoong said.

"Maybe, maybe not." Seonghwa shrugged.

Although Seonghwa didn't want to push Hongjoong to work more when he was already such a workaholic, he knew Ateez will serve as a distraction from you.

"About the guy from earlier..." Hongjoong's voice broke Seonghwa's train of thought.

"He's alive, in the hospital. But the police won't be investigating, they're just ruling it as a bar fight gone wrong. Even if he wanted to press charges, he can't argue against multiple eye witnesses." Seonghwa said, a glint in his eye.

~

Series masterlist

[cyberbun]

edit: THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! WE GOT TO THE GOAL IN LESS THAN A DAY!!! I'M SO GRATEFUL TO EVERYONE WHO DONATED!!! Locking reblogs to prevent it from spreading further.

Urgent: Transgender Asylum Seeker Needs Housing Assistance

My name is Charlotte; a lot of you know me for my presence online and many will know I am a transgender international student and asylum seeker in the US, currently set to graduate from my Master's degree in a month (hooray!), which means I'll need to move out of my university dormitories.

Unfortunately, both thanks to costs of living and the low, low salary graduate employees get, my funds have been left completely drained by this point. I have been living paycheck-to-paycheck for the past four years, and I am at a point where I don't have the ability to house and feed myself any further. I've let my physical and mental health deteriorate due to the conditions I've been living under. Throughout all of this, I've lived in university housing due to not making enough as a graduate assistant to afford anything else, staying in whatever the cheapest option is each term. What's worse, this summer, I took a full time job at my university that was not only physically grueling but also pulled the rug from under me two months before the end of the summer and cut my hours drastically, forcing me to look for help with my bills and rely on my credit card for a while. Thanks to that, I was able to remain in my current dorm housing situation, barely making rent and food every month.

This, however, leaves me in a precarious position, as I am soon to graduate, meaning I will be forced to move away from campus housing. I am currently in the process of finding an apartment in my vicinity, while also trying to find work after graduation and also juggling the end of my studies. Thankfully, once I find work, thanks to my qualifications I expect to be in a much more stable position, but I need help with my immediate housing situation, as I will be forced to leave the dorms in the 14th of December, necessitating I find a place by then.

Because of all of this, I am looking to raise $2,500 USD in order to help shoulder these charges; 2000 of which will go towards finding and furnishing an apartment (rent, security deposit, and some basic furniture), and 500 towards helping pay off the last of my university account balance and my work authorization. I am at a point where I have no choice but to reach out and ask for the help and generosity of my followers and friends in order to raise this amount in time. If this is not successful, I will have no way of affording a place to live next month. While I have a few options at my disposal in that worst case scenario, I hope to be able to avoid making use of them.

Whatever money ends up unused from this fundraiser will go towards savings, though I estimate I'll need to spend at least $1500 in rent and security deposits at the least.

If you're not able to donate, I encourage you to spread this around and share with your friends and followers, and any donation, no matter how small, will help towards my goal of remaining safe, housed and healthy.

Thank you all for your time and consideration,

-Charlotte

[vaguely-concerned]

walking through lucanis' mind prison. the tam lin of it all

[creatingblackcharacters]

Follow Up to the Follow Ups

Some feedback to the responses I received:

1) A lot of people said that fear and discomfort is what makes antiracism not worth standing alone for. Okay, so then I want you to say this phrase to yourself when it comes to that moment:

"I would rather be antiblack than be afraid in this situation"

Does it make you uncomfortable? More uncomfortable than speaking up? I want you to dwell on that! And no, I'm not saying this to hurt you; sometimes it is the better option to stay quiet. I recognize that you have to recognize your own weight class. (Not so much on Tumblr as it is in real life, granted 🙄) But this is often the outcome when we choose not to act. We just don't admit that to ourselves so directly.

Try to notice how often you make that choice, how often you even have to make it. If you find yourself saying this more often than not, do you still feel you identify as an ally when it comes to speaking up about antiblackness? I'm not saying you have to fight every single battle. I'm just asking you to take the time to notice how often you find yourself tolerating more than you don't. And if that's something that you genuinely feel isn't right, or that you want to change, do so! You have the option to strengthen your allyship!

2) I feel like my question about Black fans got walked around a bit. Tbh, that is already the reality Black people live in. The way you aren't comfortable speaking up, I don't feel safe assuming you're safe to be around. It's a far more perilous outcome for me, putting faith in the anti-racism of a person that I don't witness them express.

3) Fear, itself

How do you think I feel? 🤣 You're afraid to speak out on antiblackness because you're worried about the anger of, or- if we're being honest- the social consequences of speaking out? I have an entire page dedicated to addressing antiblackness in media while Black!

At any point, not for my own betterment but the potential- not even a guarantee, just the potential- of yours, I openly put myself at risk of racist ire to try make the space around me better. I've been called plenty of slurs and insults on my main discussing these things. It's not an easy choice to risk that vulnerability. Trust, I understand that!

It's honestly gone far better than expected, though part of that is because I have to police my own tone. I don't expect other Black people to do so, or to have to do so. I can only imagine an environment where people felt less inclined to treat me and my peers that way, that they felt the fear of social repercussions for their racism when they spoke instead of me.

My point here is, I'm not naturally built to be stronger than you when it comes to dealing with racism. The way you are afraid of your peers treating you, is the way they already treat me and my peers. I'm forced into resilience, I've spent a long time learning how to deal with this. If I can stomach living with this, you can occasionally take the risk and speak up. Again, I'm not asking you to fight every battle. But you're capable of more battles than you think.

That's it! That's the end of the introspection practice this week. Thank y'all for participating; I hope that you got some perspectives to take on with you.

[arc-misadventures]

Meet the Family Au Rin: Rin takes Jaune to her destroyed town where she made makeshift graves for her parents. Rin she talks about her and Jaune while Jaune just supports her. (Nora and Pyrrha are taking down any Grimm near by. The entire team already killed the Nuckalevee)

Meet the Family: Rin

Rin: So this... this is what's left of my hometown... It was destroyed by that, Nuckalevee we killed...

Jaune: This place is... whoa...

Rin: Yeah.. My family's house was right there.

Jaune: That pile of rubble, and ash?

Rin: Yes... My mom died in that house...

Jaune: Oh... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry to hear that, Rin.

Rin: It's okay, Jaune. My father also died here... somewhere... He died trying to kill the, Knucklevee. But, he failed... I met, Nora after that when we were trying to escape from here.

Jaune: Are you okay, Rin? Being here, after everything that has happened... It must be hard for you.

Rin: It's a little hard, but... y-your here with me, Jaune.. so... It doesn't hurt as much...

Jaune: Rin...

Rin: ...

Rin: I... I want to make a memorial...

Jaune: A memorial?

Rin: Y-Yeah... I know how to make shift one based on my families traditions... c-could you help me make one?

Jaune: It would be my honour.

~~~

Rin: Okay... It's done...

Jaune: You know... for a pile of rocks... It's really nice.

Rin: Thank you, Jaune... this means a lot to me.

Jaune: Like I said, Rin; It's my honour.

Rin: T-Thank you...

Jaune: Are we done, or is there something else we need to do?

Rin: Well... We bow our heads, and say a silent prayer to the departed. Unless you're not comfortable with that...?

Jaune: That's fine. Alright, after you then?

Rin: (Clap!)

Jaune: (Clap!)

Rin: Mom, Dad... It's me... Rin... I'm doing well... I've avenged you, I slayed the, Knucklevee... And, I've also found, a home.. I have new friends, and a new family... and... and someone special I want to spend the rest of my life with... Thank you for all that you've done for me... I love you... Goodbye...

Jaune: Mr. and Mrs. Rin... You're daughter... Lian Rin is a wonderful person. She is brave, warm, sweet, and beautiful... I thank you for bring her into this world... And, I swear on my families name of, Luna Jaune Arc that I will protect her... and, if I could have your permission... to one day... marry her, and take her as my wife... I may have to marry several girls... they won't take no for an answer. But, nonetheless! I wish to marry her... I pray for your blessing... I love her, and I want her to stay in my life, now, and forever... I promise... May your souls rest in peace...

Jaune: Okay... now what?

Rin: I guess we can leave now... there's nothing else to be done...

Jaune: Yeah... the others will be waiting for us. But, don't you want to check your old home? You might find something there?

Rin: N-No... Everything was destroyed in the fire. Not even my mothers remains...

Jaune: Alright I thought I should...

(Tink~!)

Jaune: Hmm...? What's this...?

Jaune: A ring?

Rin: A ring...? Wait...?! That's my moms wedding band!

Jaune: Your moms wedding ring? Well... That's one hell of an answer...

Rin: C-Can I have that back, Jaune...? Please...?

Jaune: Of course; Hold out your hand.

Rin: Okay.

Rin: W-W-Wait...?! Jaune that's my...?!

Jaune: There... Perfect fit...

Rin: Jaune... Y-You didn't need to put it there... people will think you asked me to marry you...

Jaune: Do you want me to get a different ring then?

Rin: ...

Rin: W-What...? W-What are you talking about, Jaune...?

Jaune: Rin...

Jaune: Marry me?

Rin: Yes.

Jaune: That was fast. You barely even thought about it.

Rin: I've been thinking about it since I first met you...

Jaune: Really?

Rin: W-Well... not imminently after meeting you... but, seeing how you treated the three of us... I couldn't help but fall in love with you... So... I... I can't help, but imagine being married to you, Jaune. So... Yes, I will marry you, Jaune Luna Arc...

Jaune: ...

Jaune: Luna is actually my first name...

Rin: R-Really?

Jaune: Never liked it as a first name...

Rin: Well... I'll make you love it, Luna...

Jaune: We'll see about that... Lian...

~~~

Nora: YESYESYESYES!!!

Pyrrha: Oh gods... That was beautiful!

Nora: Yes! Kiss the girl, Jaune! Shower her in love, and affection!

Pyrrha: One down two to go!

Nora: Bet ya he'll ask me to marry him before you!

Pyrrha: I'll take that bet!

Beowulf: GRRR! RAHH!

(BANG!)

Nora: Excuse me?! We're having a moment here?!

Pyrrha: Motherfuckers!

~~~

(KA-BOOM!!!)

JR: ...

Jaune: I think, Nora's blown a fuse...

Rin: Pyrrha also...

JR: ...

Jaune: Well then... shall we get going then?

Rin: Let's...

Jaune: After you then, Mrs. Arc.

Rin: This is the best day ever~!

[whousestypewriters]

──── ୨ৎ THE BOOK CLUB — GRAYSON HAWTHORNE + READER ‧₊˚

a/n: pt two here we are!!! do i have any idea where this plot is going??? no. but you're along for the ride bitches so enjoy!! also if this is shit its bc im sleep deprived :)

[part one] i'm a fan

"it all happened so fast. everyone was happy... and then something happened... and now... now he's dead!" alya sobs from her spot on the couch.

"did you just spoil the book we're all reading together??" kira shrieks from her position on the mattress.

"i think the bitch actually just spoiled the entire book," pheobe rolls her eyes from underneath her blanket on the mattress next to kira's.

"oh come on you knew something like this was gonna happen!"

"yeah but i wasn't expecting it to be screamed aloud while i'm halfway through," kira says exasperated. "i mean please its not even five thirty yet, we got here an hour ago, how are you already finished?"

"alya, this is why we don't come over anymore," pheobe groans. "none of us were expecting that and now you've spoiled it."

"oh cry about it, i'm moving onto my next book anyway, does anyone want some snacks while i'm in the kitchen?" alya smiles nodding her head when kira requests some food and a bottle of water.

"so we're clearly never having a book club sleepover again guys," you say looking at the camera.

"no we're gonna have another," pheobe says shuffling over into the frame. "alya's just not invited."

────

yn.books

liked by alya.green, maxine.liu.loo, pheobethereader, kirasbooknook, graysonhawthorne and 672, 983 others

yn.books the book girlies unite!! for a sleepover a trip and a readathon (alya will not be invited back) stay tuned for the yt video!

tagged: alya.green, pheobethereader, kirasbooknook

view all comments

alya.green I AM OFFENDED

kirasbooknook good

pheobethereader had a lovely time with you girls can't wait to do it again (except for you alya)

alya.green u guys are so mean wtf

user1 im desperate to know why alya's in trouble lmaooo

user2 and im desperate to know why grayson is still in the likes

user3 THE GIRLIES ARE IN TEXAS I SAW THEN TODAY AND ASKED FOR A PHOTO!!!!

user4 they're in texas you say 😏😏

user5 divine rivals crushed me oh my goshhhh

graysonhawthorne divine rivals was a enticing read, thank you for the recommendation.

user6 ok so i died-

user7 OH OH OK SO WTF WHO WAS GONNA TELL ME GRAYSON IS HERE???

maxine.liu.loo the book girlies are together again!!! (invite me next time)

yn.books already done ;)

────

"they're mine," max's voice snips through the quiet of the room. she's staring directly at grayson and clearly referring to the book girls she watches.

"i'm not trying to steal anyone," grayson tries to reassure her.

"you're obsessed with my favorite one! why couldn't you have gone for pheobe or kira?" max huffs, you were her favorite. grayson had no right to become - rightfully - infatuated with you, and no matter how much he tries to deny it everyone can see he likes you. its painfully obvious.

"again i'm not stealing anyone, i've interacted like three times with-"

"grayson! the girl you're obsessed with posted another youtube video," jameson's extremely loud voice cuts through the room and emits a groan from grayson.

"i'm not obsessed with anyone," he says rising from his spot on the couch and picking up ruthless vows, which by the way he definitely went out and bought after he read divine rivals. what? he wanted to know what happened.

"oh my gosh they're in texas!!!" max screeches clearly watching the video. "they're in texas for a red carpet that they've been invited to!" she pauses watching for more conext. "they been invited to ask the people on the red carpet about books! oh my god- XANDER. we have to go to this event oh my gosh please?"

"sure and you can bring grayson along so he can officially join the book club, and meet his new idol," jameson smirks from the doorway

grayson responds by flipping him off.

────

graysonhawthorne

liked by thehawthorneheiress, ticking.time.bomb, yn.books, kirasbooknook and 4, 892, 647 others

graysonhawthorne a nice day out

view all comments

user1 i need him religiously

user2 NO BOOK THIS TIME???

user3 oh he is scrumptious isn't he

ticking.time.bomb i saw you obsessing over what photos to choose in case a certain someone saw this gray.....

user4 PLS TELL ME ITS WHO I THINK IT IS

thexanderhawthorne oh it is...

user4 OH MY GODDDD

user5 IN THE LIKES LOOK WHOS IN THE LIKES!!!!!!

user6 they're so into each other

alya.green we gotta catch up and talk about this whole situation buddy boy

user7 ALYA 😭💀

user8 i need him to go to the red carpet so they can meet!!!

────

maybe grayson should go to that red carpet... i mean he was invited. whats the worst that could happen?

𐔌 . ⋮ 🏷️ tags .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱

@arqbella, @midiosaamor, @maybxlle @reminiscentreader, @sweetreveriee

@elysianwayy77 @tornqdowarnings, @catapparently, @zenikswaffleshop, @thelov3lybookworm

[tracklessreason]

Hiiii I absolutely adore your hive prime AU!!! I’m a huge rescue bots nerd so I was just thinking since blades (my pfp if ur not familiar) was buddies with bee and is super isolated from the other bots at griffin rock in Maine he rlly wouldn’t have seen his big change. I’d love for blades to see him and just be like “bee??? What happened man??” And bee finally talks to someone who still sees him as bee idk it would be such a breath of fresh air for the poor guy and something finally going right for him. Idk idk just putting it out there I’m eating this AU up.

Also also imagine one of the prime interrupting and blades is just like “I’m talking to bee rn can u gtfo” like bruhhhhhhh bee would cheese so hard. Sorry for the spam I just love ur idea so much щ(ಥДಥщ)

Hi there!!! I'm glad people seem to like this au as much as I do, Hive Prime is so close to my heart! I've loved Bee my whole life and now I'm getting to do something fun with him that a lot of people seem to enjoy, it makes me really happy and I love that it's bringing other people some joy too!

Now, about your ask. I had never heard of Blades, so I had to wiki him and scrounge around on YouTube a bit, but he seems like such a sweetheart!

I don't think he'd recognize Hive at first, not because he finds him so different, but because he's so tall now, cant see his face way up there!! The moment Hive leans down to be level with him Blades is like "omg hey Bee how are you?!" and Hive is weeping like a sparkling. Optimus makes certain the other Primes don't interrupt; he's having the time of his life listening to Bee's little squeaky laughs, watching his wings buzz excitedly every time he and Blades speak.

Blades' first lesson on big fat mega Bumblebee? He hugs waaaaay too hard, poor guy still isn't used to his own size yet. That would be common knowledge if anyone else had hugged him recently.

Of course, there's one more thing Blades finds out that no one knows.

Hive looks like that because he is wearing a battle mask. Like, all the time. He has not taken it off since becoming a Prime.

He and Blades are sitting alone having lunch, when he finally retracts his mask and...

It's Bee! His faceplate looks the same as ever, it's maybe the only thing about his frame that hasn't changed. Blades doesn't remark on it of course, he hasn't had a single moment where he felt that he was seeing "the old Bee" versus "the new Hive". That's his friend, always has been, always will. He just enjoys their lunch together. He's only visiting after all, doesn't have long before he's off to his post again and they won't speak for a while.

Hive is glad Blades doesn't make a big deal of it. Anyone else would have. It's the first time he's bothered to eat in a week after all.

Its a shame really that Blades couldn't stay longer. The change in Hive is palpable, but it doesn't last long after he's gone.

[sweatyracoon]

Tell Me

A/n: Sorry it's been so long. I'll try to be more active, but enjoy this in the mean time.

Warnings: suggestive, vampire boy, angst, fluff?

You had known Felix for a while, but you felt like you didn't know him at the moment.

A few weeks ago he left the shared apartment to visit a few friends at the theater. He came back feeling a little sick.

It had lasted a few days. You stayed home from work trying to help him feel better. It seemed like the flu or a head cold.

He got better, but he was still extremely pale, making his freckles brighter than they had ever been.

His eyes seemed brighter, but darkened when he became upset. He started avoiding you a bit more each passing day, confusing you.

He left the house more often, more during the evening. He felt cold anytime you tried reaching for him, flinching at the temperature of his skin. What was going on with him? Was he still sick?

You asked him once, but he claimed to be fine. It made you sad knowing that your friend didn't feel he could confine in you.

He was wearing more sleeved shirts despite it being summer.

You had finally had enough, not knowing where he was at the late hours if the night.

You decided to stay up in the living room to wait. It was nearly four before you finally heard the door handle unlock.

You stuttered, close to sleep before you heard him. You quickly turned on the light, making him wince in surprise.

He turned to face you, making your jaw drop slightly.

You hadn't seen him face to face in a long while. Just a side glance in passing.

His features had changed drastically.

His blonde hair was black due to tonight's antics, and his freckles had paled, but still leave the highlights to his pale face. His eyes larger somehow, with a red tint. His lips plump and wet, his canines poking out from his top lip.

His adams apple bobbed as he swallowed, looking straight into your eyes.

"Where have you been?" You asked quietly.

"Out," he responded, pocketing his keys. The light jingle of the chain filled the silence.

"But where, Felix? I hardly see you anymore, and you've changed." You plead with him suddenly,missing your best friend.

"I haven't changed, y/n. I've just been busy, is all." He sighed, walking to the island in the kitchen, grabbing a glass to fill with water.

"Your hair is black, Felix," You deadpan, not letting it go.

"Just a dumb decision one of the guys suggested. You like it?" He grinned, sipping from the glass.

You couldn't tell him no, because boy, did the color do him justice. His long hair framed his face, and since it was dark, it went really well with his pale features. You gulped.

"Yes, but-" he interrupted.

"So? I'm alright, y/n. Nothing's wrong," he washed his cup, hoping you'd quiet about the subject. "Why are you awake, anyway? It's nearly time for you to go to work."

"I took the day off. I was hoping we could hang out like we used to? We haven't done that since you've gotten sick," you say, hoping to get to him. Not necessarily guilt tripping, but guilt tripping.

He paused, swallowing nervously.

"I work today," he said quickly, confirming your suspicion.

"Felix, you don't have a job," you sigh, suddenly feeling defeat.

It seemed like your best friend didn't want to spend time with you. Which was fine. You just wish he'd admit it rather than tip toeing around you.

"I just don't think it'd be a good idea is all, y/n," He sighed, coming over to stand a few feet from where you sat. "It's not you, honey. I just have some things going on,"

"Like what, Felix?" You stood suddenly, making his eyes widen. "What's so important that you don't even want to see me? You avoid me like the plague, and it makes sad. We used to do everything together. What happened to you?"

At this point you were nearly yelling, and Felix took a few steps back in shock. You were known for your patience.

"I-"

"And don't give me that nothing bullcrap. Something is obviously going on. Do you have a girlfriend? Is that it?" You were close to tears in frustration.

Felix stopped, looking at you like you had just slapped him.

"Girlfriend? No! I told you I was hanging with the guys! Bangchan and Hyunjin, the ones I introduced you to. Listen, I'm just going through something is all. It's not you," Felix tries calming you down, but it only gets you more worked up.

"What is it? What are you going through that we can't go through together? We always did,"

His eyes softened at your words, coming closer to you.

"I'm just going through some changes. I'm still getting used to them. I'm sure you've noticed a few," he tilted his head at you, waiting for you to follow.

It was then when you caught the light bouncing from his bottom lip. They were still moist, and his top canines poked through, leaving small indents on his lower lip.

"Did you sharpen your teeth? And you are more pale...other than that and the hair, I don't see much of a difference."

It was a lie. You noticed everything. How he changed how he dressed slightly, showcasing his tiny figure. How his hands seemed more pronounced, as if he had suddenly hit puberty, the hunger in his gaze. Not lustful, but a yearning for someone to understand whatever it was that he was going through.

"No, I didn't. It's natural...kinda." he smiled lightly. "It's kinda hard to explain."

"Just try," you begged, grasping at his hands, making him freeze.

"why are you so cold? Do you want me to turn on the heat?" You asked, brings his hands up to your neck hoping to heat them up.

"Uhh, no. I'm okay."

He couldn't breathe all of the sudden. He felt the pulse under your skin, the artery that laid just underneath his palm.

"Just look, okay? Don't freak out?" He looked at you, and you nodded.

He gently twisted his neck to the side, showing his neck. You were confused about what he wanted you to see. Until you saw them.

Two marks on the soft skin of his neck where it met his shoulder. Dots. Resembling the same marks as the ones on tv. Vampire bite marks.

"Is this a joke?" You ask, your voice void of any emotion. You let your hands loosen around felixs', his hands dropping back to his sides.

"No," His eyes glowed with confusion. He did what you asked. "I told you-"

He silenced quickly when you brought two rough fingers up to his neck, rubbing a lot harder than you meant to. You wanted to run the makeup off his neck.

"Ow!" He jerked away from you.

That area of his neck was slightly red, but the bite mark remainder as bright as ever.

"Why isn't it rubbing off?" You ask hesitantly.

"Because it's real, damnit!" He scoffed, massaging the irritated area gently.

"How? All that junk isnt real, Felix. This is a terrible excuse to-"

You couldn't even finish, Felix suddenly snapping, pushing you against the wall. You were pinned, your breath quickening at the sight of your friend.

His eyes blazed a wicked red while his teeth seemed to grow. He scowled, showcasing the pearly whites that framed his wet tongue. His hair suddenly disheveled, his breathing heavy.

"I said, it's real! Just listen to me. Your the one that told me to spill what was wrong!" He all but growled at you, making you cower.

"What are you, Felix?" You whisper, surprised you didn't feel any fear. If anything, you could have sworn you were slightly aroused. But you weren't going to think about that right now.

"I'm still me. Nothing more, nothing less, okay?" His gaze softened as well as his tone, lowering his arms from the makeshift cage he had put you in.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

You cut him off with a hug, smiling, feeling relieved at knowing your best friend still wanted you.

"It's okay. It might be a side effect? I'll let it slide. Just don't let it happen often," you grin, seeing the weight fall from his shoulders.

"Can we still hang out tomorrow?" He grinned back, holding your hand.

"Yes. Now let's go to sleep." You said, yawning. You felt the tiredness crumble onto you.

"Oh...I can't sleep."

You groaned, leaving him to stand in the living room giggling.

[starryeyed-seer]

a fading wash of sunlight

So. This is a retired event, where the bazaar started emitting light for a few hours. At one point a voice is heard, and it seems to be the Bazaar (I mean, look at the echoing!)

This is also the event where you could release your dark carapaced crustacean into the light, and it would emerge gilded and giggling like a school girl.

The event is retired and old, so it's hard to say "this information is still fully canon to the universe", but the Bazaar's speech here is really really interesting.

Here's my rampant speculation:

I think the bazaar is talking to Sol, maybe in her sleep or something: the wash of sunlight is coming from the bazaar, but the Bazaar is acting like Sol has appeared unexpectedly and she's scrambling to implore it to Understand something. I think the fading wash of sunlight is a Day-dream, is what I'm saying

"these are my children/this is my light" "this is the Sun who commands run below"

I think light is law here and the bazaar might be comparing itself to a sun. I've been long into the idea the bazaar has aspirations of ascension, as being a judgement is the only way they could legally be together. it might be saying here 'look! I have a world of my own, my own law, my own kingdom, like you'. With the MOTR:

we get the Bazaar's feelings after London just fell. It seems a bit depressed in general but is tired of running and being a Courier. It wants a place of its own. But we know it doesn't ONLY want that, or it would stay in the Neath and chill.

"The one who denied" is likely the. One who said NO to sol, which prompted the bazaar to do All This Shit.

this and

this from 7th letter are all we have about this Other Sun. We don't strictly know it was a love letter, that just makes thematic sense (and the bazaar seems jealous)(and it would work for "love's enemy" of course)(It probably was a rejected love letter but I like to point out alt interpretations and how little we know total)(I got into suncrab out of spite you know initially. I realized the fandom had given me a false idea of the relationship which simplified it to a black/white "sun dickhead bazaar pathetic". So I thought about alt readings of them until I got into it)

Also, note the Bazaar rocking up to the Pheonix like "wait you don't want your flame?? 👀 is it free? Free fire 🔥??"

I'm not sure what "but the enemy, love, is the last we shall see". Beyond 'enemies of love' being the forces which keep them apart. Their relationship is forbidden because of the oppressive laws of the Chain. If their relationship is found out, they and their daughter will be put on trial and sent to some judgement torment nexus.

It makes a promise that All shall be Well. I think the Bazaar's motto might be an echo of what the sun has said to it before. It repeats "all shall be well" constantly without having much luck ensuring that (see: axile). I don't think it has failed to keep All Well on purpose, I think he is basically muttering this promise as a lifeline. Echoing and hoping it'll be true.

and then "Crown me with a knot of flames, my love, my love"

Crown being a word of royalty/ascension. what 'flames' means in FL I'm not sure, but it here is suggestive of 'make me a judgement'.

Then it apologizes... "Forgive my trespasses" a bit late after asking to be crowned. What trespass? Something it did angered the sun but it wasn't punished or killed either.

Elsewhere in a lacre vision: "You dream, feverishly, of a bright light in a long lone empty place; of a gift given and a gift rejected; of the one you love moving away, inevitably as the motions of an orrery, distant as childhood." and elsewhere is it repeated the sun rejected the bazaar.

I think the gift rejected is love, and the bazaar's trespass was something in the confession of that love.

It continues "the fire and the rose are one"-- if the bazaar wishes for a fire crown, does it wear a rose one now? Roses are love, follies, devils, temptation, desire.... is the bazaar trying to prove a point that love is an equal force to fire? Love and feeling are as powerful as law and the fabric of the universe? More powerful?

Anyway thanks for coming to my BazaarTalk. For the 15th anniversary we should get this event back but better (it was hourly so few peoplegot to see all of it). And more.

[dumbasslesbi2]

Let Me Read To You ~ Chapter 8 (Agatha x Rio Bookstore AU)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7

Summary:

Agatha and Rio finally get married!

Notes:

HI I'M NOT DEAD! Sorry for the wait y'all but school has been kicking my ass, hope y'all enjoy!

Rio was going through the mail just a couple days before her wedding and found a letter addressed to Agatha that seemed suspicious. “Honey? There's a letter here for you” Rio exclaimed as she entered the living room. “I wasn't expecting any mail, how weird” Agatha said as she got up from the couch to take the envelope from her. As Agatha looked at it, she recognized the writing immediately, it was Wanda. “Rio I can't open this, you open it. It's Wanda” Agatha said with irritation, tired of dealing with her ex wife. Rio opened it immediately, eager to see what she had sent. “She said good luck with the wedding, that's it?!” Rio semi yelled out, looking and flipping the letter to see if there was anything else. “God she loves making my life a living fucking hell” Agatha groaned, pacing around the living room. “She's fucking lying, she's making us anxious on purpose. There's no way she would show up, especially not after I kicked her ass” Rio told Agatha, holding her shoulders to stop her from pacing.  “But what if she shows up Rio?” Agatha said, holding on to Rio's wrists. “How will she know what day we're getting married. She won't know. And if she shows up, I'll kick her ass again “ Rio told her, grabbing Agatha's chin to force her to look at her. “True, I just don't want to deal with her,” Agatha said, sighing. “Just get a restraining order, I know it won't happen till after the wedding but still. I hate how annoyed she gets you” Rio told her as she caressed her cheek. “You're right, I don't know why I didn't do it before” Agatha said, sighing once again. “Now come on, let's go back to picking out flowers” Rio said, dragging Agatha to her office.

The next couple days were a whirlwind but finally the day of the wedding came. Rio actually did stay at the house and had slept in the upstairs apartment of the bookstore. They wanted their looks and everything to be a surprise so they agreed to not see each other the whole day. That doesn't mean they didn't text each other though. Honestly being away from Agatha and Nicholas made Rio’s anxiety go sky high. Alice was in charge of helping Rio get ready and wasn't prepared for what she would walk in on when she went upstairs. “Rio?” Alice yelled out as she entered the apartment, noticing 3 empty wine bottles and a couple broken glasses in the sink. “Rio! Where the fuck are you!” Alice yelled as she looked around. Finally, when she got near the bathroom, she heard sobs and understood what was happening. Slowly Alice opened the door, seeing Rio in the bathtub, tears streaming down her face. “Hey” Alice said quietly as she stood at the door. “Hey” Rio said, putting her head against the wall. “Alice, I'm scared,” Rio said, holding her knees to her chest. “Scared of what?* Alice asked as she kneeled next to the bathtub. “What if I fuck this up, what if I mess everything up like I always do Alice? I can't put Agatha through that” Rio whispered, practically whimpering. “Rio, in all this time you never left Agatha. You never ran from her or Nicholas.In all the years I've known you, I've never seen you as happy as you are with them. You won't fuck or mess it up because you haven't and you won't. Agatha loves you and you love her, deeply. Trust me, we all heard you two at the beach house” Alice told Rio, giggling at the end. Rio couldn't help but chuckle and groan as well. “Ugh you're right. Also I can't help it that me and Agatha have a healthy sex life” she said as she wiped her tears. “Now come on, we gotta get you ready for the wedding,” Alice said, getting up and closing the bathroom door to give her some privacy. 

As the two spent their time getting Rio ready, Agatha on the other hand was at her house with Jen helping her. “Oh my God Jen, this is really happening!” Agatha exclaimed as finished putting on her suit. “I know, I'm so happy for you two!” Jen told her as she helped Agatha smooth out any wrinkles. “I'm just happy we're finally making it official, I just love her so much” Agatha said as she turned to hug Jen. Jen was a bit shocked by the hug but she came around and hugged Agatha back. “Thanks for everything Jen. You and Alice are the best” she told her barely above a whisper. “Of course, what are friends for?” Jen told her. After they got Agatha all dressed and ready they helped get Nicholas ready. Normally to get him in a suit would be a pain but once they told him he would get to see Rio once he was dressed he finally cooperated. Once the two were set Jen drove them both over to the book store where Lilia and William were already there, finishing the decorations and everything. Once Agatha and Nicholas got there with Jen they set them at their places. Jen made sure she had the rings and put them on the holder they gave Nicholas to hold. William brought out his violin and began to play once Lilia told him to. Upstairs Alice heard the music and told Rio it was time. Slowly Alice opened the door and helped Rio walk downstairs. The moment Rio saw Agatha, she couldn't help but gasp at how beautiful she was. The feeling was mutual since Agatha had almost instantly had tears streaming down her face the minute she saw Rio. Nicholas couldn't help himself and ran to Rio, luckily not dropping the rings. Rio gave him a small hug before holding his hand so they could walk to Agatha. As the two stood face to face Lilia gave the wedding officiant speech but honestly, both Rio and Agatha were waiting for when they could speak. “I, Rio Vidal, want nothing more than to be your wife Agatha. I want to be there for you everyday and come home to raise our beautiful son. I wanna be a mother to Nicky and watch him grow up. I wanna get old with you and deal with Nicky as he becomes an annoying teen. I wanna be there when the going gets tough and when you need a shoulder to lie on. I love you Agatha, I want nothing more than to be your wife” Rio told Agatha as she held her hands. “Rio, I love you. I love you and I know Nicky loves you too. I would love to be your wife and a mother to our son. I know I don't have the best track record when it comes to relationships but I know that you're my forever. I want us to be a family and for us to be together.” Agatha told her, trying not to start crying again. The two didn't even wait for Lilia to tell them to kiss and instantly kissed after each other's speeches. “Well I guess I promise you two wife and wife” Lilia told them with her hand on her hip. “Sorry, couldn't help myself” Agatha told her as he separated from Rio. “Yeah, yeah ,yeah” Lilia said walking away. The group all cheered and laughed as Nicholas ran up to his two mothers. Agatha made sure to pick him up and put him in-between the two of them, kissing him on his cheeks. Jen made sure to grab a photo before the moment was gone. 

As the reception went on Agatha was a bit on edge, she felt at any moment Wanda could show up and ruin everything. Rio had noticed but didn't say anything to not let the group know. “Agatha, you ok?” Rio asked as the two were finally alone. “Just nervous, I feel at any moment Wanda can barge in” Agatha told her, taking a sip of her wine. “Baby, if she wanted to ruin this, she would have been here already. She wanted to make you on edge and too nervous to enjoy our wedding” Rio told her, taking her hand in her’s. “I guess you’re right. She always used to do this too. Make me think she would show me things but leave me out high and dry.” Agatha said, caressing Rio’s hand with her thumb. “Now come on, I wanna dance with my wife” Rio said, dragging Agatha out to dance. The two danced for a while until Nicholas wanted to join the two in which they immediately picked him up and swayed him. Rio couldn’t think of the last time she was this happy or felt so loved. She had everyone around her that mattered to her and for once in her life she felt at peace. Agatha on the other hand was thinking the exact same thing, she never thought she would find love after Wanda. She felt traumatized after dealing with her divorce but everything came so easy and nicely with Rio. She never had to ask for anything, Rio just somehow always knew. Agatha never thought she would find someone who loved Nicky as much as she did but she had no doubt in her mind that Rio loved him as much as she did. For once in her life she felt relaxed but more importantly, she felt loved. The two danced the night away with their beloved son as their friends joined in and celebrated the most important thing to all of them, love.

[basementalhealth]

Jevil headcannon #12

Jevil's words doubling sometimes is just a verbal tic he developed from losing his mind and the second time he says the word he's doubling,instead of it sounding smoothly the same,it sounds like he sat on a prick.

[hurglewurm]

rather unfulfilling therapy session about how bad i am at speaking the same language as others and seeing and being seen. not without its worth. feels awful though. i'm not happy

[blizzardfluffykpop]

why the fuck do i miss pigeons

[mangostarjam]

where's that post about wanting a quiet life —

i turned down an interview to promote to a supervisory position and my boss has been gently disappointed (and wrangled another boss to join in this) and i just — i appreciate their confidence in me and my abilities but i also just... don't... want that job. i get paid enough now and can make it work (and it's unionized so i still have raises in my future) —

i don't want to toss aside my hard fought work life balance and take on all that responsibility. i just want to do my job, not care so much about it, and use my free time for what i actually enjoy in life

[fragglerockopinions]

.