#don’t speak about male characters unless you have the capability to talk about at least one (1) female character with the same enthusiasm

[ntaras]

i think people in the mortal kombat fandom should be required to pick one female character and write a study on them before they can do anything else

[tomatograter]

do you have any thoughts on trans girl jake? i thought their narrative and character arc on being specialized by the others, and being comfortable about themself will wrap up nicely with them ending up as a transgirl!! it defies what people expects of them, and breaks them out of the traditional idealized reoccurring masculinity theme (which jake was obviously uncomfortable with)

(what follows is my personal thoughts, i’m not laying down the word of God, i just have Thots on Jake English ALSO THIS IS A PRETTY LONG POST? IM SORRY. i promise i will include pics.) 

Jake English is a gender mimic. He’s the ‘raised by wolves’ trope, except instead of literally being raised by dog like Grandpa Harley he had a few years with Jade and then mostly nothing but the monsters at lusii island and a crap-ton of escapist media. He’s used to having a full playing field where he can indulge in unquestioned fantasy, and that comes in the form of his Indiana + Croft sexy 2000′s hero persona that is comfortable for him (and its worthy of note how one is Peak masculinity and the other is Peak femme fatale) until he has to really interact with real people with Expectations and Biases. 

This is where i need to talk about the alphas. It’s nearly impossible to talk about Jake without talking about how he adapts around other people, specially the ones that he truly gives a shit about. Jake selectively picks the opinions that matter to him, and these are mostly what the other alphas think. (Compare to how he speaks over Erisol, jesters around Caliborn, and mostly pumps his own self pity with Tavrosprite for compliments- If you don’t want to count the epilogues scene he has with Davekat which mostly boils down to “you might have a point, but i’m loyal to jane, so you’ll have to really convince me of politics.”)

What holds him back from dating Dirk is Jane’s opinion, and What Jane Could Think (which is in no way jane’s fault, just his overthinking) because unlike dirk’s high octane masculinity, she’s the pillar of sitcom normalcy in his life. She lives in the real world, mostly removed from the bullshit the rest of the alphas are in, and she’s written to be the ideal generic romcom youth living a perfectly picture worthy life. The disastrous conversation where Jane denies her feelings is prompted by Jake finding confirmation she’s into him via Roxy- and he immediately grows nervous of that meaning she wouldn’t “approve” him going any other way, or that it’d be weird for a boy like him. And he needs to be sure before anything else- and also every step of the way, which will eventually exhaust her because its a load of bullshit and not her responsibility.  It’s not that he doesn’t want to, it’s more that he’s afraid what others will think if he wants.

But he’s never direct about it. He just brings things up and lets people get their own opinions from it- because he’s REALLY passive about conflict and he’d rather solve things with the least amount of struggle possible, always. He just needs confirmation. And then comes this bit:

I read this bit of text in 2 ways: 1) Jake realizing pretty soon that his attractions aren’t limited to gender. & 2) Jake realizing pretty soon that gender is just a big ole scam, and that he couldn’t care less if it weren’t for outside perception of him. It’s just another performance!

Jake’s ongoing theme is that he hates being perceived (be it sexually, mentally, personally, in the sense that he abhors judgement and objectification and is afraid of being known) just as much as he gets by freely by allowing others to project whatever they want onto him- and he’s not bound to complying unless it’s shit he enjoys. He’s an indulgence chamber. He doesn’t want to be bound by rules or expectations partly because he’s sort of a lukewarm coward and partly because he thrives in contradiction. And all that sounds pretty dandy, but it doesn’t means he’s exempt from anxiety of what others think of him every step of the way and what that means to his projected image. Brain Ghost Dirk is part dirk splinter, part jake constantly asking himself ‘what would dirk do?’ because he thinks he’s not capable on his own.

and its where we get my favorite line:

“i dont WANNA be a man and i dont WANNA punch her in the face!” Maybe 2000′s action heroes who shoot first and ask questions later are, generally, sort of pretty stupid? And his fantasy can only go so far before it becomes something all too real he doesn’t want to be a part of? THIS is the line. I’ve already written about this bit before, in how Jake’s sexuality and the denial of his agency over it are traditionally a feminine narrative applied to a character desperately trying to be the quirky male lead of an adventure story. He really wants to be both. He doesn’t want to be forced to choose or to subscribe to one extreme. He wants his cake and he’s going to fucking eat it, too.

The crockertier Jane/Jake scene encapsulates everything jake wants to project, Indiana & Croft, and spins it on its head: he would rather die than be the big man hero and hurt jane (and he does die for it, later) & becoming the femme fatale means giving up what little agency he has for other people’s eyecandy benefits. and maybe that really fucking sucks? He loves these concepts but he also really hates the reality of them? That’s the concept of Jake.

But despite all that, he’s generally comfortable with his masculinity to the point of neutrality unless somebody else brings up The Norms and how he’s betraying them by not being the definition of a cishet dude. All the alphas have a very tricky relationship with gender performance, and they rely on notions of eachother. ( https ://twitter. com/hulknaps/ status/1133205821024800769?s=20 ) But Jake relies on the alphas to define him based on the moment. He adapts to different people in different ways. he switches often, because the persona he’s constructed is not solidly him, just one of many detachable masks of convenience. the aspect of transformation or characters with chameleon features is all over his intro page too, even if it starts as a red herring that he might be lord english.

Just count how many references you can make to alter-egos, transformations, ‘avatars’, multiple personalities or forms in this one page. i’ll make some of them easy: Mystique, Ghost rider, Hulk, his beloved Avatar, all rely on the concept of having fluid forms. Two of them are also blue ladies! did you know there’s a blue hulk and he’s a goofy jock? i’m going offtopic, but you grasp the idea.

I’m utterly subscribed to the idea of Jake being GNC/nonbinary/genderfluid or simply slapping a big ‘agender’ on it. I give dirk shit for always running from the gay label out of fear, but jake sort of does this too, relying strongly on not being defined and doing whatever feels best at the moment. It also fits his aspect and denizen, but those are more abstract references.

and since i dont know how to better end this bit of meta, here’s a little section of Mystique, blue lady extraordinary and one of his beloved characters. make of it what you will.

[cadcnce-archived]

          BIG ASS CHARACTER SHEET FOR                    FANTASY VERSE WYLAN

I found an image while going through my files for cursed pics to send @spiritmaiden​, they had the audacity to take it and fill it out for the fantasy verse of their sky-zel, so I of course have to match the effort for Wylan because I’m not about to be shown up. It’s hella involved, nobody’s getting tagged but damn if you want an exercise in hitting your character then give it a shot. Most is under the cut because of length.

Character’s Name: Zachary Reis (Born) Wylan Rechtur (Used) Character’s nicknames: Ze (by his sister) Wy (by his friends and preferred) Zephyr (mercenary name, also what you’d see on any wanted posters) Gender: Male Righty or Lefty: Righty Age: 25-26  Height: 6′-0″  Weight: ~180 lbs Eye Color: Emerald green, bright and wide filled with a mix of confidence and playfulness. Hair color: Dark brown, messy and falling to his ears. Unkempt may be a good descriptor, but he generally keeps it down flatter at the least.  Distinguishing marks: His body is pocked with marks and scars from fights and other disagreements, but the ones most easily discerned are knife scars on his hands, and a short arc above his left brow. Describe physical traits in one passage: A good way to view him is concealed strength and agility. He’s toned and in good shape but doesn’t often dress or carry himself in ways that would flaunt this. His posture and pose are loose, and his expressions can be lazy and playful. So the moment he flips that switch and uses the full brunt of his power? It’s a surprise. He’s also a bit on the lanky side, his body size doesn’t fully compliment the size of his limbs. 

FAMILY/ RELIGION

Parents: Mother and father were disappeared/dead when he was just a bit over 6 years old and his sister was an infant. They were involved with the church but not royalty themselves. Wylan never spent much time figuring out what. They had a life left for him and his sister that he threw away as well. His father was a gentle soul while his mother was razor sharp and firm. Siblings: Younger sister, Katelynn Reis, but goes by Lyn with her friends. Wylan calls her Kat. She’s ~5 years younger than he, and remains with the church training and working as a healer. Whereas Wylan ran away from being a Paladin, she stayed strong to become a Cleric.  Significant Other: Verse dependent, Wylan typically is averse to romance and prefers casual encounters.  Children: None, nor is he open to them initially in his canon.  Other relatives: None remain living that he is aware of. He and his sister were raised by his grandmother on his father’s side, but she passed away shortly after he left the knight’s academy, when Wylan was roughly 16-17.  Pets: None. But he does enjoy talking to cats. Friends: Wylan is the type who ‘knows a guy’, he’s close with many tavernkeeps and makes nice with the adventurer’s guilds and their members as well. His work as an informant necessitates things like this. Wylan is also the type to consider most anyone he encounters and converses with a friend, whether they like it or not. His best friend though would easily be a wandering adherent by the name of Emke. I don’t care what the thread is about in some way she’s involved in his life. They’re platonic soulmates. Enemies: As a mercenary and hunter, some others in his craft would consider Wylan to be their rival, and in many cases he would view them just the same. It’s hard to say he has any enemies outside of pointedly evil factions however! Relationships (other): His relationship with his sister is an odd one. They’re still in touch via letters and the occasional visit, and he does what he can to support her with his money, but they’re not close like conventional siblings. There’s a strange codependence between them. Wylan depends on Lyn as a ‘rock’, and she depends on him as the ‘sea’. Ethnicity: Human! His origins are mostly a mix of Germanic/Portuguese if you wanted a comparison to Earth races/ethnicities. Religion: He recognizes the existence of higher powers but his relationship with them isn’t the best. As if being rebellious to his parents wasn’t bad enough he has to be tsundere towards The Light. This is noted when he uses holy magic such as wards and smiting spells and getting rebound into his own body upon use. Superstitions: He’s incredibly wary around the undead and spirits. So catch him spreading salt when he has to camp somewhere less than lively. Also give him a moment to sharpen his silver weaponry...  Diction, Accent, ETC.: His dialect is pretty clean, though this depends on who he’s speaking to, being the travelling sort he is he’s capable of lightly ‘faking’ various accents, or just being lazy with his own manner of speech. Traces back to proper speaking that was drilled into him as a child and then his own rebelliousness. SCHOOL/ WORK / HOME Education (Highest): He was well learned with the academy work that he actually accomplished. While he never finished and never put his all into his studies, it was clear to his teachers that he had a gift for learning but a problem with conviction.  Degrees: None! But just so I still have something here, one of his informal titles is ‘The Gale’s Fang’. Vocation/Occupation: Jack of several trades, wrapped up best as a mercenary informant, and a monster hunter. He’s good at tracking both people and monsters and taking them down- lethally or not so much. Employment History: Wylan was fully involved with the knight’s academy from the age of 6 to 16, so for those 10 years he had his hands full dealing with that and trying to figure out himself (poorly). Upon leaving the academy after the accident, he took up arms and was given tutelage by the thieves’ guild which taught him how to use his senses and move quietly through the shadows. Wylan didn’t make a good pickpocket, but he was good at reading other people and exceptional at duels. It wasn’t long before he took the advice of the guildmaster and made better uses of his talents. Not necessarily for good, but for more profit. By the age of 22 he was an accomplished and well connected informant, bartering information as well as putting his swordwork to use headhunting and slaying monsters that made issue outside the cities in which he frequented. This continues to current/canon start of interactions. Salary: He’s affluent enough not to worry too much about his state of living, but he can be prone to splurge spending that puts him in a bind for a few weeks at a time, at least until the next job puts money back on the table. Status and money: Continuing off the above, he’s decent enough with his funds (after sending money back to help out his sister) but wouldn’t be well off enough to be considered rich compared to his modern verse. Fortunately he has enough renown that jobs aren’t too hard to come by for him. And many barkeeps and friends are willing to open a tab for him. So he’s not too desperate.  Own or Rent: Wylan typically rents inn rooms when he stays in the cities, and camps when he’s out in the woods. Technically he also owns if you count helping his sister keep her own place running (thought it’s really about 30-70, with his sister funding most of it)  Living Space: Wylan never stays long at the room. It’s a place to go back to and sleep. Personal belongings? Very few. Most things he owns that he wouldn’t want to lose stay back with his sister kept in a basement or separate room that he uses on the rare times he’s back in the capital/holy city from which he originally hailed. As you can imagine, this isn’t very often.  Work Space: N/A! He doesn’t have one! Given his work is almost entirely in the field. Main Mode of Transportation: CATCH A RIIIIIDE. Though he’s apt to have a horse around for transport if he isn’t going too far. Long voyages for when he changes locales would probably be hitching a ride with a caravan. He also doesn’t mind voyages on foot too much. PSYCHOLOGY Fears: Externally he has an aversion to ghosts and spirits. The concept of the dead coming back to haunt you isn’t something he much cares for. Having access to light magic should mostly assuage this, and yet it can give him goosebumps anyhow. Ironically he has a fear of large mammals in his modern verse but that shit doesn’t apply here given he’s a monster hunter! Internally he fears being forgotten, not making a name for himself, and dying before he can truly feel alive.  Secrets: His birth name, Zachary Reis, isn’t something he will bring up with anyone. It’s not necessarily a ‘dead name’ for him, but it’s one he threw away the same time he decided he was going to toss away his ‘fate’ as a paladin. Taking the name of Wylan was another way he took his life for himself in his mind. Despite this being a path of self destruction. His sister is also something he doesn’t often bring up unless he very much trusts that person.  IQ: Surprisingly high. He picks up a lot of information doing the work he does, but you wouldn’t be blamed for not believing this. Eating Habits: They could be a lot better. He eats enough to get by, but his diet isn’t as varied as it could be. Wylan hunts small game when he can, but he isn’t an exciting cook so ALAS. This boy prefers hitting up taverns and getting basic meals like stews, jerky, sandwiches, etc etc. Sleeping Habits: Wylan is a very light sleeper. Typically if you so much as step into the room he’s sleeping in he’ll snap into awareness. It takes a loooong day of exertion to keep him sleeping deep otherwise. Frustrating is how he ‘fakes’ being asleep. So someone could come in and start rummaging and he would still breathe and move as if he were still sleeping. Up until he sits up and stares or cracks a joke. Dare you to kiss him when you think he’s asleep.   Book Preferences: History tomes every now and then. Wylan doesn’t read much fiction and prefers any time he spends reading to be somewhat productive! Make up for other education he missed as part a result of running on the academy. He also reads up on magic and sorcery to work on the wind affinity he also has.  Music Preferences: Wylan doesn’t play any instruments but he DOES love love love to dance and sing. He’s an entertainer at heart and loves to rally people however he may. Suffice to say he’s amusing to go drinking with. And not just because he starts bar fights to amuse himself. Groups or Alone: He’s primarily a lone fighter. Some hunts he will of course work with a team of other hunters, he’s not stupid enough to take on the larger beasts by himself, but there’s a preference for doing things on his own terms. He’s self aware enough to know that his ways and methods can be grating, but ah... how all of that clashes with his desire to show off and have an audience. Being Wylan is suffering. Leader or Follower: He’s both, but prefers to be a follower if he can help it. Let other people make the plans then nudge them this way and that to better fit your own methods. He’s a prankster and a good compliment to most parties after all, so you’d be wise to utilize him! Lest he utilize himself... but that said, he’s an anti-hero, so there’s possibility in there for him to be a leader as well and take charge. It just isn’t his default nature and he’d rather not. Planned Out or Spontaneous: Wylan is chaos incarnate. Most everything he does outside of necessity/work is spontaneous. All his mischief and plans are cobbled together and thrown out there. Sometimes he’ll do a bunch of things at once, like throwing a bundle of darts at the wall to see which ones stick. And oh my fucking god don’t get me started on being romantic he can’t plan for shit in that department. Journal Entries (Do they keep one?) Nope. Not a daily journal at least. He’ll keep notebooks and the like for jotting down intel and what have you for jobs he takes up. But most of the time he’ll just have little notes in his pocket, and not really chronicle his life. He may also make ‘fake’ entries to tease people or trick them. See what he did to Zelda the one time. Be careful what you believe... Hobbies, Recreation: Tricks!! Sleight of hand!! Cards and dice!! Part of growing up and learning with a thieves’ guild is getting involved in lots of things that make use of your hands and dexterity. He likes playing random games with folks and oh! People watching. Stalking. Not the cutest thing but Wylan makes a hobby out of ‘testing himself’ and exercising his talents. His hobby is unfortunately annoying people, to summarize. How Do They Relax: His hobbies help him to relax! Also, if you can believe it, sitting back in a group conversation and watching the conversation happen and move forward. Learning about other people is something he likes doing, which is hypocritical since he can make himself so difficult to learn by contrast. BUT THE REAL THING HE DOES.. is practice sword fighting. Slow rhythmic swings of his blade, almost like a dance. He focuses his thoughts and calms his soul when he practices. It’s like a mix of swordfighting, dancing, and yoga. Controlling himself. Feeling himself. It’s multiple things.    What Excites Them?: PEOPLE. Things! Happenings! The unknown and pushing himself to new limits. Honestly one of Wy’s biggest drives is doing something or becoming something that will make him ‘Feel Alive’. Because for all of his antics and frivolity he’s very much fighting an encroaching darkness in his soul. So he’ll search out bizarre things to get involved in. It’s one of the reasons he’s bugging Zelda, because her involvement in witchcraft and his own suspicions have him interested huehue. Pet Peeves: Being ignored. Like perfectly disregarding his existence and whatever he’s getting up to. If you’re not reacting to him being him then that means he’s not being effective and he’s losing. It’s his only real weakness...  Prejudices: None. He’s not the most respectful person so most everyone, royalty or important or otherwise gets subjected to similar treatment. If anything, the more important you are the more likely you are to get annoyed! Attitudes: He’s usually with a front, a mask if you will. His general attitude is curious and nosy, but that’s fronted with a playfulness and proclivity for being annoying. Don’t be fooled, he’s usually something more pensive and calculating underneath that exterior. Wylan actually quiets a fair bit once that mask is taken away, his mood swings down and his tone is a touch deeper. Stressors: Things going awry and his friends being put in danger. He absolutely does not do well with people he cares about being hurt. One of the worst things that can happen to him is his sister dying for example, and has lead to one of his most self destructive plots I’ve written, in this verse especially. Lovers? Don’t hurt them. Don’t endanger them. The idea of rivals or enemies going after people he cares about.. hoo. MAN. None of that please. He can be SO damn possessive. In relationships he’s very self conscious as well of fulfilling their needs. So if his partner remarks, regardless of how offhandedly, they’d like more of something he will TRY TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN.  Obsessions: Being an absolute pain in the ass. And in cases where someone has wronged him or someone close to him? Tracking them down and getting closure/revenge. That shit takes him to the brink of killing himself. Addictions: None to the point of being problematic, but he does love eating pickles.  Ambitions: To make a name for himself, to be renowned and respected. To feel alive and accomplished as a person. He’d also like to take down a dragon someday. Get some armor from its scales and a sword out of that shit. As Seen by Others: Capable and dangerous, but impossible to work with for long periods. Keep a tight lip around him lest he use that information against you and learn things you’d rather keep secret. A lecherous womanizer. As Seen by Self: A body of broken glass, encased in a shell, covered in masks. Who are you? What are you? Where are you even going? You’re lost. You’re aimless. You’re swimming and swimming and eventually you’re going to be tired, aren’t you? ASTROLOGY/PHISIOLOGY Birth Date: October 10. Time of Birth: Evening. Western Astrological Sign: Libra Traits Associated with Western Sign: Social, Clever, Unreliable, Diplomatic Traits Associated with Chinese Zodiac: N/A, seeing as I don’t age Wylan with the years this doesn’t really apply. Handwriting: Clean when he needs it to be, but otherwise a quick script with lots of pen strikes. He’s capable with drawing diagrams and the like as well! This boy can throw out monster diagrams with weak points and other ecological notes oh yes yes. Sexual History: Wylan was already exploring that sort of thing before he left the academy, so yes... as early as 16 he’d already lost the v-card. He doesn’t really do relationships and enjoys casual encounters. Many a maiden at the bar or elsewhere has taken him for a spin. Typically partners aren’t reoccurring in fantasy verse, however. He’s... well, very good in the performance category.   General Health: A+ healthy aside from the sleep and subpar diet bits. Strong and good stamina. Medical History: He’s nearly died one times too many. Been stabbed, cut, poisoned, bitten, but hey he’s still alive! And that’s what he’d argue matters with this business. Allergies: SHELLFISH. Chronic Illnesses: None to speak of. Handicaps: He’s somewhat of a type B tsundere. It’s awful.  OBJECTS Purse / Bag: He’s got a coin purse that he’ll carry spare gold around in for spending on what have you. Supposedly food but he’s weak to splurge purchases. Most everything else he keeps on him in his pockets and his belt. Wallet: Uhhh see above, coin purse!!! He’s got enough for the week or so!! Don’t try and pickpocket him because he will catch you and you will feel stupid. Fridge: He doesn’t keep food around. He more or less has to scavenge for everything he eats either through buying or hunting. That’s kind of the life for the vagrant he is, isn’t it? Medicine Cabinet: N/A, but he does keep bandages and salves at his room.  Glove Compartment: N/A!! Junk Drawer: NNNNNN/AAAAAAA Kitchen Cabinets: Wylan get a house so I can fill this out challenge. Bedroom Hiding Place: Behind a wall panel or somesuch if he can manage. Otherwise in the floor or outside the window. Closets: His wardrobe typically includes tunics, coats, leather armor and harnesses for his weaponry! He’s got a couple swords in fantasy verse, and he’s got throwing knives and a grappling hook!!  Backback: Yeah uh see above, what a question. Locker: None Desk: WYLAN KEEP ITEMS AROUND CHALLEEEEENGE.  Clothes pocket: Daggers, notes, maybe a writing implement and paper so he can jot things down. He’s also got little knick knacks like a gem or a monster tooth to show off. Isn’t it cool??? Also lint.

OTHER Halloween Costumes: Werewolf!!! Get him in either just a lazy one with gloves and ears or deck him out in the whole garb. Love that idea on him. In one verse Big Bad Wolf is his nickname, and in another he flat out IS a werewolf! So yeAH. Tricks: He’s very skilled at sleight of hand!! Card flourishes and dice rolls. Cup games. Illusions and dexterity... he’s a slippery one! He’s also likely to catch you in words, using things you say against you. He gets really meta and oh how annoying that can get... Talents: SWORDPLAY- He learned from a very early age at an esteemed academy where only the best knights get trained. He mixes that style with a more ‘street’ type that he picked up with the thieves’ guild and even further as a monster hunter and mercenary. Suffice to say that all mixes together into multiple stances he can switch between depending on what he’s up against. Strong sweeping strikes, vicious stabbing and leaping, poised dueling and parrying... he’s a TOUGH fight. MAGIC: Wylan is at odds with his use of holy magic that utilizes the light to bless and heal. Until he comes to terms with himself and the power he wants to channel it’ll have ‘blowbacks’ on himself. Fingers will burn, head will ache, and his stomach will flip. But it’s still undeniably effective for where it is! Aside from that he knows some wind magic to supplement himself. He’s not known as ‘Zephyr’ for nothing after all! Gusting steps, slashing winds, REALLY BIG JUMPS!!! If you throw him he’s a fantastic projectile! And lets see- DANCING! He learned it first as part of his etiquette as a knight, but it’s something that’s evolved with him and oh does he enjoy festivals for that reason. Ballroom styles are what he’s most familiar with. Dance with him. Please dance with him. Politics: Indifferent! Doesn’t care for authority figures to begin with so in any case or kingdom with a monarchy he’s very buh about it. He’s very self-accomplished and his beliefs would push him towards meritocracy over anythign else if you ask me!  Flaws: Suspicious, possessive, and very persistent. This could be a strength too but for the most part can be seen as a detriment because of how it ends up being applied. Which is in self-destructive tendencies WOO. He’s also very lustful, and can be distracted by a fine woman and let himself be swayed by his desires over time. Have I mentioned he isn’t the most reliable? He’s apt to lie to people and give intentionally wrong impressions just to make it easier for him to slip away. You gotta go up a few levels to unlock that... So yeah, sins are WRATH, LUST, and ENVY. Strengths: NONE. Okay if you earn a solid place as his friend there is almost NO limit to what he’ll do to protect you. Wylan has a ridiculous amount of determination and mental fortitude and he can and will strike down a GOD to keep those things that are precious to him. He’s also an amusing character to have around, if you are feeling bummed he is almost guaranteed to find a way to cheer you up and support you if only so he can not feel as guilty teasing as he usually does HUE. He’s got a very up beat personality! Sure, a lot of it is a mask but he WANTS it to be real and that’s what really matters if you ask me. His reckless optimism can be endearing. There’s a lot of other surprising mental qualities such as how clever and quick witted he can be. Part of that mental fortitude lets him think and fight on his feet regardless of how much pressure he’s under. It takes a LOT to dampen his thought processes. Drugs/Alcohol: He drinks frequently, but he wouldn’t be counted as a drunkard. Wylan rarely drinks to excess, and prefers to do so among friends and good company. Passwords: Uh, do ritual prayers count? Magical spells? Heh. Email Address, Home Page, Blogs, etc.: Oh if only this were for modern verse... Time and place: Medieval fantasy! Magic and creatures! I also love throwing Monster Hunter vibes in for the big monsters he goes up against. Special Places: For him? Cliffs overlooking the ocean. Abandoned temples he can just chill at. For all he enjoys being around people now and then he really appreciates quiet isolation. Special Memories: Lots of memories with his sister before they more or less split ways. There’s one in particular where he was trying to teach her swordplay when she was just a little girl, and she about stubbed his toe when the wooden practice sword fell right on it. Her panicked attempts to try and heal him were something that really stuck with him.

[marvelhead17]

The Tale of Eossimar (Original Female Character x Bofur Fic)

Chapter 6

Word Count: 5.7k

Warnings to cover the whole fic: Fake relationships, half-blood children, mild violence, fight scenes, male/male relationships, Dwarf gender concepts, battle of five armies fix-it, pre-battle of five armies, near death incidents, talking to dead people, mentions of paradise/heaven.

Callon opened the entrance and they walked on down the path that Bofur had taken them on the day before, though this time it was more leisurely instead of running for their lives. They were close enough to the lake to see a man with a barge, he was retrieving the barrels that they had escaped in and he hadn’t noticed them approaching.

Nari stopped walking and she held her finger to her mouth for them to remain silent, they waited in confusion as she began to walk along the shrubbery, still hidden.

Bilbo whispered loudly, “What is she doing, she can’t just steal his barge can she?” he gestured in disbelief.

“Don’t worry yerself Master Baggins,” Callon assured him quietly, a smirk forming on his features.

She climbed onto the boulder and leaped onto the barge, making a loud thud as she did, the bargeman dropped the barrel he was rolling and turned around in fear, appearing ready to assault whatever was threatening him.

He immediately relaxed, shaking his head but still giving her a light chuckle. She laughed and they exchanged pleasantries for a short time, the company tried to listen in but they were too far, though they seemed familiar enough with each other. They edged closer and finally caught on to the conversation.

“Ye know, ye still owe me a visit to Lake Town,”

“That won’t be so easy now, the people are becoming suspicious that you are not of Man, and I do not blame them for it,” he crossed his arms.

“What if I told ye, it wasn’t for me?” she asked and he raised a brow, “Ye see, I have some dwarf friends, they’re merchants from the Blue Mountains, and they’re needing to visit their kin in the Iron Hills…”

“Could they not go around?” he insisted.

“They’ve had a long journey Bard; they cannot delay their arrival any further than they have,” she countered.

“I know where those barrels came from,” Bard gestured to the battered barrels.

“Aye, and what of them?”

“My gut tells me that these dwarves you speak of had previous business with the Elves, and clearly it did not end on good terms. You know the Master’s wealth comes from trade with the Woodland Realm, and he would rather see them all in irons before risking the wrath of King Thranduil,”

“I’m not asking for ye to hide them from the Master, just to hold them indoors until nightfall, and let them on their merry way on a few of yer smaller boats, and then they’ll be off yer hands.”

“Nari, it would be incredibly risky of me to, I’m on thin ice as is-” he argued.

“But the risk is certainly worth the reward,”

“I’m listening,” he raises a brow.

“I know yer children will be in need of food and clothes, especially during these difficult times. And I’ll pay ye everything I’ve got,” she held out a bag full of coins, “Ye can’t say no to providing for yer bairns, now can ye Bard?”

He sighed, but agreed with her, “This is the last time I can do this; you understand do you not?”

“Aye, I do,” she nodded seriously, tossing him the bag, “Tell the children I said hello, would ye?”

“Aye, I will, the girls miss you dearly,” he tucked the bag away on his person.

She turned to leave but stopped herself, “Oh and one last thing- if anything is to happen to them I will not hesitate in coming for ye, understood? They’re my kin too,”

“Aye,” he nodded seriously, and continued loading the last of the barrels onto his barge.

She hopped off the barge and stood in front of the company, her hands triumphantly resting on her hips, “My friend Bard is going to escort ye to Lake Town, once yer there ye can get some boats and travel across the waters to Erebor on the other side,”

“How do we know we can trust him?” Thorin asked, looking at the man sceptically.

“I’ve visited that man’s home for years; I know him and his family well enough. He is one of the few ye can trust.” She spoke seriously, “And I gave him a good enough warning for him to heed, so ye will all be safe there,”

“We’re not going with them?” Callon asked, taking the words right from Bofur’s mouth.

“Aye Callon, they’ll have enough trouble with their numbers trying to sneak in and out without us tripping them up, and this is their quest,” she nodded to Thorin, Callon glanced at Fili before staring at her again.

“And yer to listen to Bard because he knows his town better than the lot of ye, he would not tell ye to do something unless it was for yer safety.”

Callon tried to argue, “But I’m sure they could use the extra hands-”

“If they could travel from the Blue Mountains across Middle Earth to Mirkwood without us, I think they’ll be capable of travelling the rest of the way,” she told her brother firmly.

“Nari, we must thank you for everything you’ve done, you’ve been a great help to us.” Balin smiled encouragingly.

“Yes, we will be sure to come back for you once we’ve reclaimed our home,” Dwalin added, patting her shoulder.

“It was nothing, you are our kin after all,” she waved the thanks away, “We will be waiting anxiously for the news,” she agreed with a smile. “Ye should get going; time is catching up with ye.” She turned to see Bard waiting almost impatiently for the company, and they moved on to the barge.

“Thank ye again lass, we’ll see ye soon!” Bofur waved his goodbye, she waved back.

“Keep safe, the lot of ye!” she called back, “And Fili, keep an eye on yer brother!” the golden hair dwarf nodded, rubbing his brother’s hair playfully much to his annoyance and then waving his goodbye.

Soon enough the barge set off from the small dock, most of the company turning their attention to the other side of it to watch the waters ahead of them, while a few kept their eyes on the shore. Nari and Callon stayed watching until they drifted out of sight; once they were gone she turned and marched on towards the village wordlessly, with Callon slowly following her.

The dwarves stared across the lake in wonder, through the mist the peaks of Erebor revealed themselves, and for most this was the moment that made them realise that everything they had gone through was very real, and their home was almost tangible now.

Suddenly Bard yelled out, disturbing them from their day dreaming, “You must hide!”

“We will hide when we are sure of danger,” Thorin spat back.

“If you value your freedom, you’ll do as I say.” Bard frowned angrily at him. “There are guards ahead, get in the barrels, quickly now!” Despite the initial argument the company scattered immediately and settled into the barrels, the barge swiftly drifted up to the dock, and Bard climbed off towards a man that stood on the end of it.

“What’s he doing?” Dwalin asked irritably, unable to see where the bargeman had gone.

“He’s talking to someone…” Bilbo spoke up, using the hole in the barrel to peep through, he could make out Bard chatting to a man; and noticed him pointing casually towards the barrels, “And, oh, he’s pointing at us...” He watched as he shook hands with the man, and dropped some coins into a waiting hand. “Now they’re shaking hands.”

“What?” Thorin grunted in disbelief. “I thought Nari said we could trust him!”

Bofur spoke up, “Aye, we can Thorin, have some faith in Nari’s words lads-”

“The villain!” Another dwarf called out.

“He’s selling us out,” Dwalin growled.

“Lads, be reasonable and think-” Bofur was cut short when bucket-loads of fish flopped down on top of them all, and their fear of being caught turning into that of disgust, as the smell of fish overwhelmed their senses.

They continued on from the docks, with plenty of groans and complaints of the smells, and of being cramped in such small spaces for what felt like hours.

“Quiet,” Bard muttered, now irritated with the dwarves, he kicked one of barrels nearest to him, “We’re approaching the toll gate now,”

“I’m not mad at you Narriel, I’m simply disappointed. And to be throwing about another person is not welcome behaviour, especially as a princess- you have expectations to meet,” Misteth chided as she paced before her throne, shaking her head in disapproval.

“Aye, mother, I, I understand,” Nari bowed her head, and slowly lifted it up again.

“I insist that you apologise to Cáleb, it is the least that you can do for him,”

“But, mother I-”

“I will not hear any arguments out of you,” she snapped, “The healer tells me that he shall be on bedrest for at least a week to recover from his injuries,”

“Aye mother,” she bowed her head, gritting her teeth slightly.

“And Callon, my dear son, I do wish you had put a stop to that nonsense before it ended the way it had,” Misteth tutted.

“A- aye mother,” Callon mumbled, not thinking he would be scolded as well, and bowed his head.

“Now both of you go, and Narriel, I will know if Cáleb did not receive his apology, so I suggest you don’t avoid doing so,”

“Aye mother,” she nodded.

Without another word to their mother, Nari and Callon left the hall, with Nari muttering angrily to herself about their mother, and they walked towards Cáleb’s home.

“Nari, why don’t ye take a breather first, before ye go ahead with this?” Callon asked, and she shook her head.

“I’d rather get this over with now,” she muttered.

“Then I’ll come with ye,” he matched her pace easily with his long legs.

“Alright,” she didn't argue further.

They entered his home and a familiar voice caught her attention, “Haven’t you done enough to him, Nari?” she glanced to the right and locked eyes with the young elf maid Elva.

“I came to apologise to him.” Nari stated.

“All of a sudden, why?”

“Let her in Elva, it’s alright,” Cáleb spoke from the other room, they all walked in to find him sitting slightly elevated on his bed, with several ointments clearly anointed over his wounds.

“Listen, Cáleb, I apologise for what happened earlier today, I may have taken things too far…” Nari rubbed the back of her neck uneasily, standing as far as she could from the bed.

He shook his head, “No I apologise,” Nari frowned, “I should have realised when to stop making advances when you clearly did not return them, you deserve better than that…” Cáleb continued, “You were angry, I understand that now,”

“Well… thank ye,” she shuffled on her feet awkwardly, “I, I wasn’t expecting ye to apologise to me,”

“It’s the least I can do for causing you the heartache I did. I only wish it hadn’t taken me so long to realise the pain I’d caused, but the look in your eyes told me everything today,”

“Still, I am sorry for half-murdering you, it wasn’t very fair.”

“Well, look, I’d been selfish, you’d been angry, and I accept your apology, it’s water under the bridge,” he waved his hand, “We were simply not meant to be.”

“Thank ye,” Nari nodded, feeling a huge relief fall from her shoulders, “I- I hope the best for ye Cáleb,”

“Thank you, to you as well Nari,” he bowed his head, and she did as well.

Nari and Callon stepped out quietly, and walked on with no destination in mind. “That went… surprisingly well, thank Mahal. Mother won’t be able to bother me about it now,” she chuckled lightly, Callon only nodded.

“Why is it that ye didn’t jump at the opportunity to join the Company?” he suddenly asked, making Nari look at him in surprise, “I mean, ye’ve wanted to return to Erebor for so long, it’s all we’ve ever talked about, dreamed about in fact,”

“Well… as much as I wish to return home, I still fear that we may not be accepted, and it was painful enough the first time around,”

“But once Thorin becomes King we’ll be welcomed,” he reminded her, “And it’s only right that out of all of us ye should be the first to return home, ye aided the company when they needed it most, and ye were likely the first to be cast out,”

“Perhaps ye’re right,” she stopped walking and stared at him. “Will ye come with me, brother?” he nodded, “Right, we’ll need a boat, and some supplies.”

They quickly ran to their homes and collected their own supplies in small backpacks, and met where a collection of small paddling boats were kept, they used to be used for the occasional trip to the waters, which had long since been collecting cobwebs.

They lifted one above their heads and carried it out beyond their borders without being noticed by any villagers; they made quick work of heading towards the lake and settled it into the water just by the dock. The memory of the dwarves’ departure was still fresh in their minds, they left barely a few hours ago and it was well past noon now, her brother stepped into the boat and waited for her.

Nari glanced down towards the area that she had found the dwarves in the day before, and stopped as she noticed a large form that had not been there earlier, she sprinted closer and froze at the scene before her.

“Nari, what is it?” Callon called out, she darted back wordlessly to the dock and practically leapt into the small boat, causing it to wobble unsteadily. “Nari?”

“Deer carcass, scattered everywhere,” she informed him, taking the oars into her hands, “The orcs must have somehow tracked them down,” she immediately set out to row the small boat by herself.

“How?” he asked, “Surely it can’t be from Kíli’s wound?”

“I’m not sure, but they have Wargs as well, who knows how close those bastards are to catching up with them,” she huffed worriedly. “I just hope we won’t be too late,”

“They wouldn’t have boats like us,”

“But if they’re determined, which they have been, they’ll have run halfway around the lake by now,” she insisted, “They could be killing them as we speak,”

“We cannot be certain, but we cannot only think the worst of the situation,” he tried to reassure her. “We will get there in time.”

If the fish hadn’t been enough of a problem then the task of moving passed the toll gate was even greater, after some words with a man Alfrid who had attempted to empty the barrels out into the lake they were relieved to be in the clear, at least for the time being.

They drifted further along and Bard finally deemed it safe for the dwarves to reveal themselves, walking over calmly and knocking over some of the barrels, making them crawl out in a mess of fish.

Bard approached another barrel and was met with a growl as Dwalin burst his head through, “Get your hands off me,” he and the others soon climbed out the barrels, grumbling and slimy, but relieved that they might be gaining foot on Erebor now more than ever.

A man on the dock stared with his jaw hanging open, and Bard swiftly approached him, opening his hands and placing a handful of coins and closing them. “You didn’t see them,” he looked at the elderly man, “The fish you can have for nothing,” he added, and the man was only able to nod in response, still staring at the company.

The company looked around to take in the so-called Lake Town, only to be greeted with a scene that could only be named as miserable, everything was wooden and seemed filthy, the clothing that hung on lines had minimal colours. A sure sign that the town was poor and suffering, and yet they seemed to be making the most of their situation.

Bard marched passed the dwarves and peeked around the corner, examining both sides and then turned to them, “Follow me,” he walked on.

The company were sceptical as they glanced at one another, but under Nari’s word understood that they needed to trust him, and so they followed him through the shadows of some of the taller homes. The planks creaked and groaned under their feet, making them weary of the instability and being more cautious with their steps.

Out of the blue a boy ran up to Bard, his voice speaking unevenly from his sudden exertion, “Da! Our house, it’s being watched,” Bard looked to the dwarves as did the boy, his eyes widening in surprise. “Friends of Nari?”

“Indeed,” he thought for a moment and frowned, “We’ll have to get you in through the sewers-”

“The sewers?” Dwalin asked in outrage, “Are you mad, we’re not going in the sewers!”

“You don’t have a choice; it’s the only way I can get you through unseen,”

“This better be worth it bargeman,” Thorin muttered, and the dwarves murmured in disgust.

Bard led them to a sewer cover used for maintenance purposes, but by the state of it, it hadn’t been touched for years, he opened it up and Thorin peered in, trying hard to hide the disgust that spread on his face.

He jumped in, followed one by one by each member of the company, with Bombur being the last to follow and having to be yanked down as he nearly became stuck in the crusty hole. He fell in with a massive splash causing them to yell out in disgust.

“Quiet, we don’t need to draw attention to ourselves,” Thorin scolded, he turned to look at the pipes ahead, “We’ll have to go on our hands and knees, Mahal help you if you get lost,” he added with a huff, before crouching down and crawling forward on all fours.

The others did the same, moving straight ahead until they reached their first turning point that Bard had mentioned, a sudden flush of water gushed from a nearby opening and ran underneath them, raising the level of waste slightly. The smell was rancid; a mix of food that had clearly rotten and partially digested foods, their noses stung and a few dwarves complained that they might become sick.

“Well I’ve dealt with a lot worse, ye lads clearly have yet to smell the worst of Bombur’s farts, this is nothing by comparison,” Bofur joked, only the younger dwarves let out a chuckle, while the others groaned and shook their heads.

They continued on, turning another two corners before hopefully reaching their allocated destination, they waited in the darkness silently. It felt long, too long, and Thorin only hoped that they had made it to the right spot, otherwise an unsuspecting stranger was about to receive the worst surprise of their life.

Finally they heard the signalling knocks above them, and Dwalin offered to be the first to exit to ensure it was safe, Thorin made no arguments. The dwarf raised his hand above his head and he slowly stood up, pushing the lid of what he now understood to be the toilet, out of his way; he relaxed knowing that they were in the right place, but it improved his mood no less.

His eyes met the bargeman’s son with a glare, “If you speak of this to anyone, I’ll rip your arms off,” he reached his hand over the bowl and started pulling himself out, the boy tried to offer him a hand in help and he immediately swatted it away irritably, “Get off.”

Although slightly scared by the dwarf’s gruffness, the boy pointed further down the walkway to a set of stairs, “Up there,” he waited as the others climbed out, keeping a look out just in case they were still being watched.

An older girl peered at the stairs from the main house and called out uncertainly, “Da… why are there dwarves climbing out our toilet?”

“Will they bring us luck?” a younger girl asked hopefully, looking up at Bard excitedly.

“Well, we can only hope so Tilda,” he gave her a warm smile, “But they won’t be staying for long, they’re friends of Nari’s simply passing through,”

“Oh Nari! How is she Da?” the older girl asked.

“She is well, and wishes she could’ve visited as well,” Bard smiled, though a little sadly.

“Are you also half elf?” Tilda asked, peering up at Bofur, he smiled down at her making his hat flop in an awkward manner.

“No lass, we’re all dwarves,” he crouched down, “So ye’re friends with Nari are ye?” she nodded, “Do ye think ye can tell me more about her then?”

“I can, but only if you can tell me something about dwarves,” she smiled mischievously.

“It’s a deal then,” Bofur grinned and shook her hand gently, she bounded off to Bard after being called over and he stood up once again.

The dwarves gave themselves a quick scrub down with buckets of warm water and cloths before putting on their now tainted clothes that Nari had provided for them, and they settled inside the main room near the fireplace, having blankets passed to them and given warm beverages to heat themselves against the winter chill.

“They may not be the best comfort, but they’ll keep you warm for now,” Bard said to the company.

Bofur nodded in agreement and curled the blanket a little tighter around his shoulder, wishing he could cosy up in the armchair by the fireplace and sleep for at least a day, realising how sore his muscles truly were after resting in Eossimar the night before. He took a good long sip of his drink and sighed as the warmth spread inside and gave his body life once more.

“Thank you very much,” he heard Bilbo speak politely to Bard.

He smiled, the Hobbit never ceased to amaze him with maintaining his manners over the course of their journey, it was a wonder he had survived the unruly dwarves for nearly a year.

He watched as Bard’s children, who he’d learned were Bain, Sigrid and little Tilda, spoke excitedly to each other. Tilda seemed a little shy to return to him with conversation about Nari, as she stayed nervously by her sister’s side.

He noticed that the girls had braiding in their hair tied off with ribbons, not the usual styles worn by Man, and reckons that Nari had probably taught them how to do different styles, perhaps a mix of Elvish and Dwarvish.

He was disturbed from his thoughts when Thorin unexpectedly muttered in fascination at something beyond the window catching his attention, “A Dwarvish windlance,”

Bilbo walked up next to Thorin, his beverage clutched tightly and his blanket draped over him like a gown, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he peered at Thorin and then at the windlance.

Balin, having decidedly left his blanket and finished drink walked up behind them, “He has, the last time we saw such a weapon,” he nodded to the window, “A city was on fire, it was when the dragon came,”

Thorin stared out the window, pain clouding his features as the memories came flooding back to him, as if they had happened just yesterday. Bofur leaned closer to listen in, as his family had lived in the Blue Mountains years before the attack on Erebor and he was curious.

Balin spoke on, placing a hand on Thorin’s shoulder gently, “That day, Smaug destroyed the City of Dale. Girion, the Lord of the City rallied his bowman to fire upon the beast, but a dragon’s hide is tough, tougher than the strongest armour – only a black arrow fired from a wind lance could have pierced the dragon’s hide – and few of those arrows were ever made. The store was running low when Girion made his last stand.” He shook his head sadly.

Thorin spoke with disappointment, “And had the aim of Men been true that day, much would have been different,” he shook his head.

Bard stepped up, adding himself into the conversation, “You speak as if you were there,”

“All dwarves know the tale,” Thorin told him.

“Then you would know that Girion hit the dragon,” Bain walked up next to his father, “He loosened his scale under the left wing,” he added, making Thorin scoff in disbelief. “One more shot and he would have killed the beast.” He insisted, making Dwalin laugh from behind him.

“That’s a fairy-story lad, nothing more.” Dwalin shook his head.

Thorin’s impatience bubbled up and he looked at Bard seriously, “You took Nari’s money, now where are our promised boats?”

“Wait here,” Bard instructed with a huff, and hurriedly left the house, leaving his son to re-join with his sisters.

Bofur finished off his drink and hummed to himself at the pleasant warmth that lulled him into comfort, he peaked out of one of the windows and could see Bard, and he found himself feeling thankful for the help that Nari had brought to them.

He glanced at the young brothers and eased up as he saw Kíli resting his leg up and reclining on an armchair; he was certain that the young prince would have been on the verge of death had it not been for Nari healing him.

He looked out the window and watched as Bard finalised his arrangements with another man, they shook hands and Bard disappeared out of view. He turned to find Thorin and some of the other members in worried discussion privately, and wondered what they might be on about now, so he took a few steps closer.

“We must reach the Mountain before then,” Balin informed them.

“And if we do not, if we fail to find the hidden door before that time?” Kíli looked up at them from his seat.

“Then this quest has been for nothing,” Fili gritted his teeth slightly, looking down at his brother and still clearly concerned with his condition.

Bard returned suddenly which drew the company’s attention, they all gathered around a large table, waiting for him to speak.

“I have three boats available for you to use, four including my own, that you can use to travel across the lake,”

“Then we should get moving, we’re burning daylight,” Thorin said, about to walk away.

“You’re not going anywhere.” Bard ordered, making the soon-to-be King stop and stare at the bargeman.

“What did you say?” Dwalin asked angrily, stepping forward.

“There are spies watching this house, and probably every dock and wharf in the town.” He locked eyes on Dwalin and then addressed the others, “You must wait till nightfall.” Several members muttered displeased about the idea, “Unless you wish to be caught and jailed by the master, and his wretched helper Alfrid?” he asked them.

The dwarves discussed the matter for a bit before Thorin spoke, “We will stay,” he announced, though Bofur caught the quick glance at Dwalin which made him believe otherwise.

Bard nodded, satisfied with the answer and spoke to Bain, “Watch them” and once again left the house.

Dwalin muttered about having to be ordered around by a Man, and they each returned to their seats around the house and waited, albeit impatiently. Bofur had decided he preferred looking out the window, only to be disturbed by a light tug on his trousers; he frowned and saw Tilda staring up at him with a shy smile.

“Oh, hello lass, thought ye’d forgotten about me,” Bofur smiled and she giggled shaking her head, “How about we have a seat then?” he asked, taking a seat on the floor, and waited for her to sit as well.

“How do you know Nari?” Tilda asked, settling her hands on her laps neatly.

“Well, promise ye won’t tell yer Da first?” he raised a brow and she agreed, he spoke quietly, “We only met her a short time ago, but she helped us after we escaped the Elf dungeons,”

“Elf dungeons?” Her eyes widened, “Did you go to Mirkwood?”

“Aye, we did, and they didn’t fancy the idea of Dwarves walking through their territory,”

“That is mean of them,” she shook her head, “Did you meet Prince Legolas?”

“Ye know of Legolas?” he asked in surprise.

“Mhm, Nari told me that she courted him, but only for a short time,”

“Courted?” he raised his eyebrows and thought for a moment… Oh, so ye care about feelings all of a sudden do ye? The words echoed in the back of his mind and her behaviour suddenly made sense now.

“Yes, but she ended it when she found that he did not actually care about her,” Tilda added, “She told me to be wary if a boy asks to court me, but I’m not very worried, Da and Bain are very protective over me, besides I’m much too young…”

The girl babbled on for some time but the words were drowned out by Bofur’s thoughts. He wondered how long ago this courtship happened, then he wondered how it began in the first place, and then his mind raced with the possibilities of what may have happened intimately within the time of courtship-

“Are you even listening to me?” She asked, crossing her arms.

“Oh, sorry lass,” Bofur gave her a sheepish grin and then pointed to her hair, “Did Nari teach ye girls how to braid that?”

“Oh yes! My sister Sigrid did this for me, a Dwarvish braiding,” she showed off her hair, “She likes to wear the Elvish ones more,”

“They’re lovely, truly,” Bofur grinned, Nari had indeed taught them well.

“Now tell me something about Dwarves!” she asked excitedly, and Bofur thought for a moment when a carved horse caught his attention.

“Do ye see that little horse over there?” he asked, and she frowned as she turned around, taking the object from the windowsill and settling in her lap. “Aye that one,”

“What about it?” she asked, passing it to him carefully as he reached out for it.

“I carved this beauty myself,” his chest puffed out a little, “Ye know how I know that?” she shook her head, “Ye see these little curves here? These are how I signed my pieces,”

“Really?” she asked, taking the item back and staring at it in amazement, tracing her fingers over the newly discovered markings. “I thought Dwarves only mined and forged,”

He shook his head, “My family stays in the Blue Mountains, we cook, we mine, but we also dabble in toy-making,” he told her, “And somehow this little fella ended up in yer home,”

“My Da gave it to me when I was little, it's the only thing I have of my Ma's,” she ran her fingers over the figure, her eyes threatening to spill tears and Bofur felt a pain in his chest, she quickly sprung up and hugged him; he was surprised but did not move away, and then she whispered in his ear, “Thank you for making this,”

“Oh- of course lass,” he patted her gently on the back, she released him and wiped away her tears, “That’s why I make them ye see, to bring a little joy,” he smiled, “Now don’t be crying for too long, yer mother would want ye to be smiling,”

“Tilda!” Sigrid called for her younger sister and the girl glanced over her shoulder.

“I have to go, thank you…” she frowned, not knowing his name.

“Bofur.”

“Thank you, Bofur,” she grinned and held the horse close to her heart, before running over to her sister.

Bofur smiled and stood up, taking his time to stretch out, and walking over to the princes who were seated by the fireplace. He glimpsed at the window to see the sun setting down, marking the end of another day, and wondered what the people of Eossimar would be up to that evening.

He caught Fili fussing over Kíli as he was shuffling about uncomfortably in his seat, and Kíli swatted away his brother’s hand irritably, making Fili move back into the other chair and cross his arms in annoyance.

“Ye alright there lads?” Bofur asked, looking between them with a raised brow.

“Yes Bofur, Kee’s just a bit tired is all,” Fili responded, shaking his head at his brother.

He knew better but didn’t wish to get between the brother’s little quarrel and moved on around the house a little. He could see for himself that Kíli was still far from recovering fully, but he had yet to follow Nari’s instructions to rest as much as possible, for they were still constantly on the move to reach Erebor.

The silence was promptly disturbed as Thorin addressed the company making Bofur jump in his skin, “Let’s go, we are not waiting for nightfall. We’ve wasted enough time as is, on your feet, now.” He stalked out of the room, followed closely by Dwalin and Balin, while the others gathered slowly by comparison.

Bain attempted to block the door but ducked away without hesitation under Dwalin’s intense gaze, and Bofur stood in the home for a moment. So much for listening to Bard as Nari advised us to do. He sighed and ran after the others, not wanting to be left behind.

They walked the paths for a bit before finding four small boats, it was very likely not the ones that they were provided but it didn’t matter to Thorin, who was adamant that they were leaving now. The dwarves quickly put their small packs of goods in the boats, and a few had climbed inside, others made to untie the boats from the docks.

Kíli, who had stayed aside for the most part, stepped forward and hissed at the unexpected pain that shot through his leg. He grabbed his leg, not only dropping his belongings with a loud clang, but then leaning against a stand nearby. It swayed under the unexpected force of Kíli’s weight and creaked sideways, falling into another table next to it, and causing crockery, fruits and other titbits to bang against the wooden planks beneath them.

The company winced in surprise at the sudden noise and all looked to Kíli, who promptly stood himself upright and winced again, Fili ran to his brother’s side in alarm.

Within moments they were surrounded by guards and held-up with swords, “Dwarves!”

____________________________________________________________

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[spookyc]

I sure do!!

Well then, I shall divulge.

So, in my talentswap Kiyo is the protagonist as he is the ultimate detective. Originally this was just because I thought it fit but I definitely have more of a definite reason as to why I chose him for the ultimate detective. So a big thing I wanna do with this au, is to give more of the unpopular characters a spotlight, this can be seen with the main central group of the game, Kiyo as the ultimate detective, Tenko as the ultimate astronaut, and Angie as the ultimate child caretaker/assassin. (Which, yeah, It's kinda funny how these three ended up being the main trio considering what happened with them in canon) And when I played v3 I always thought Kiyo was super interesting, not only his talent but also his entire personality. It was so unlike what you would expect from the typical dr cast, I mean the creepy guy of the cast isn't the main antagonist? It was so different and it drew me towards his character, and I even indulged in a few of his free times which were always super fun just because I learned something new with each one.

And then, well, chapter 3 happened. I don't believe I have to explain what happened with that. I remember being kinda bummed out, I mean, the creepy weirdo just ended up being a creepy weirdo, a creepy weirdo who was abused by his shitty sister, but a creepy weirdo nonetheless. Didn't help that I have a brother that I'm decently close with; the entire thing just made me very uncomfortable. So I figured it would be super interesting to go through a story with Kiyo's lenses, to understand why he believes the things that he does and to give him a second chance, in a way.

Also when I really sat down and thought about it, it made a lot of sense to me. Like, in this au I want to keep their backstories intact, (for the most part) and I also wanna keep the fact that they were originally pursuing their canon talents until an event happens that changes their mind. So originally Kiyo was still gonna go for the anthropolgy route, but on one of his vacations, he happened upon a murder case. In the beginning he planned to just observe how the scene would play out, but because he's so attuned with people, he ends up finding out the killer and has him arrested. After this he becomes fascinated with criminals, about their ideologies, their psychology, the history behind past criminals. And so he then redirects his path towards that of a detective, perhaps partially out of a sense of justice, but mainly out of a morbid curiosity to see, "how far the depths of humanity can go."

I also noticed how in the canon story Kiyo often likes to observe others and sorta likes to stay neutral on most topics and I feel this would really benefit him as a detective. But yeah! That's essentially the reason I decided to make him the ultimate detective but let's dive into more of his background and how he grows throughout the story.

So, let's just go ahead and get this out the way. The sister issue. Now, as I stated before, I have a brother I'm close with myself so the entire incestuous relationship with Kiyo and his sister makes me deeply uncomfortable. So I'm sorta divided on two options. 1. I could eradicate sister from Kiyo's story completely and pretend she never existed. Or 2. I keep sister but simply change the form of abuse she inflicts on Kiyo. I'm leaning more towards the second option as this way I'm not just neglecting the abuse Kiyo went through, but I also don't have to make myself uncomfortable by acknowledging the incest stuff.

Anyway! Moving on to the more exciting stuff. So, I still want to have Kiyo involved with the occult, or at least he used to be. See, possibly a year or two ago, (and possibly in regards to sister's death but I'm undecided on that) Kiyo performs a ritual that goes horribly wrong. And the result of this ritual enables Kiyo to see and hear the spirits of the departed. And while at first it was intriguing, it soon became annoying at best and mentally draining at worst. It's simply a fact of life he has to deal with, and due to this power he can see and hear the ghosts of his dead classmates throughout the story. Which is both a blessing and a curse.

Now, as for his development throughout the story, here's what I'm thinking. Now, Kiyo doesn't really have many confidence issues, he's proud in his line of work and he's unapologetic about his beliefs and such. And I wouldn't really wanna repeat Shuichi's storyline anyway. So, for this au, I think Kiyo's arc throughout the game will be learning to trust and gain acceptance amongst people he loves. Rather than the twisted perception of love that Kiyo gives off in canon, I'd want Kiyo's result from sister's abuse to be that no one loves him and no one ever will.

He then begins to believe that love doesn't exist, and not just romantic love, but any kind of love. But rather than grow depressed by this fact, Kiyo uses it as a way to uplift himself. Telling himself that he doesn't need love and that he's perfectly fine being alone. To put it bluntly he's basically just coping from the abuse, trying to use it as shield to protect himself when in reality it's just a sword pointed at himself. But then again, what reason would he have for not believing this? This very concept is what's made him such a great detective.

He doesn't take sides because he can't understand the reasoning behind either side, not in an emotional way anyway. And even though he's incredibly successful in his work, there's a part of him deep down that is terribly lonely. A part of him that longs for company, a part of him that wishes he knew why hatred always burns in the eyes of those he arrests. And it isn't until he's kidnapped and taken to the Ultimate Academy that he finally has to acknowledge this part of himself. This starts with his relationship with Tenko.

Which, as you might expect, doesn't start too well. Tenko of course still has her "degenerate male philosophy" (though after chapter 1 this part of her becomes severely toned down and we get to see what her actual character is like sorta like what canon should have done before chapter 3) but Tsumugi, (ultimate pianist) accompanies Kiyo for a lot of chapter 1 and this sort of slowly warms Tenko up to Kiyo. After chapter 1 tho, when Kiyo flawlessly solves the first case, Tenko sees how useful Kiyo is and grows a sort of begrudging respect for him. After the trial she congratulates him on a job well done and Kiyo appreciates the gesture, obviously being able to tell that it wasn't something she was particularly ecstatic to do. Chapter 2 comes around and if you read my ask about Maki (ultimate artist) , you know this is when she starts spreading the "rumor" that Angie is an assassin.

Kiyo initially doesn't buy this at all, because even though he's exceptionally good at reading people, Angie is a total blank for him, so he can't really confirm or deny the rumors. What he does notice, though, is that Tenko seems to he strangely angry at these rumors, growing visibily distressed whenever Maki brings them up. He doesn't really get it, seeing as though he's only seen the two talking a handful of times, but he brushes it off but he doesn't get involved with people's personal bis. Until Tenko comes to him. He's surprised to see her and even more surprised to see the angry expression on her face.

She tells him that they can't keep letting this go on. He asks what and she responds with the rumors. He agrees that the rumors have gotten out of hand but he asks her what she wants him to do about it. She tells him that he is the only one that the others will believe. And he's like, fair enough, but why do you care so much. And she responds saying, "Because I have her motive video." Kiyo is shocked by this info and asks why she can't just tell them herself. And she says that, "Well, because the rumors are true, she is the ultimate assassin."

Kiyo is again flabbergasted and asks Tenko if she intends on him lying and she says yes. He asks her why, in the most sincerest tone, truly not understanding why anyone would go this far to lie about someone they hardly know, Tenko responds. "Because something isn't right, Monokuma has to be playing some trick, there's no way Angie is capable of murder." Kiyo still doesn't understand, but seeing the fierce determination in her eyes, he knows he won't be able to refuse her offer. And so he agrees that tomorrow he will do his best to dispel the rumors about Angie and convince everyone that she isn't an assassin. And then, the very next day, another body is discovered.

Immediately the opportunity to clear the air is gone in the mass confusion. And it's not long after that everyone begins to pin their blame on Angie. So, Tenko approaches Kiyo again asking if she can accompany Kiyo on his investigation, but only on the basis of defending Angie. Kiyo, who isn't used to working with others, hesitantly agrees and the two form a reluctant partnership. Kiyo initially plans to work on his own but after Tenko finds a few vital pieces of evidence he grows more accustomed to her presence and the two actually bond quite a bit, although they don't admit it.

Eventually the investigation ends and the two head to the trial together, convinced that Angie isn't the killer. Of course the main lie of this trial is that Angie is not the ultimate assassin, the only real thing that was pinning her to this case. After that is cleared up, Kiyo, along with some help from Tenko, solve the case. All is well and good with the world it seems, until Maki speaks up. She asks Monokuma to show Angie's motive video, just to be 100% sure that she isn't the ultimate assassin.

Immediately Tenko retorts, saying that they already cleared up that she wasn't but Maki replies.

"Well, if you're so sure that Angie isn't an assassin, then you should have no problem with me showing this right?"

"Unless, you know something we don't?"

The others agree with Maki and demand that the motive video be shown. Tenko looks to Kiyo, demanding he do something but Kiyo shakes his head. "They're too far gone now." Tenko clenches her fists, but doesn't say another word. With a grin of pure malice, Maki tells Monokuma to show the video and he complies, if a bit reluctantly due to Maki's tone. The video plays and the truth is revealed, Angie is the ultimate assassin.

After the video the students erupt into an uproar, angrily turning towards Tenko and Kiyo and demanding why they lied. Tenko responds that if they hadn't lied, the rest of the students would have gotten them killed. They also turn on Kiyo, asking why a detective would lie. He responds saying it was the only way to get to the truth. He also adds that Angie being an assassin had nothing to with this case, they already determined the true killer.

But despite their statements many of the students are still outraged as they mount the elevator. They also notice Angie is not with them, as she seems to have disappeared during the chaos. Two individuals however observe the scene with twisted glee, Maki and Kiibo (ultimate supreme leader). After everyone gets off the elevator, Tenko approaches Kiyo. She thanks him for standing up for Angie, and this time she actually sounds genuine. She then admits that maybe he's different than the other degenerate males and that he's not so bad. Kiyo accepts the sort of compliment and Tenko walks off.

And for the first time Kiyo feels happy. Now he's felt satisfaction after a solved case and even sometimes felt contentment but, he can't remember the last time he felt happy. The last he felt like he belonged. And after this the two from a solid friendship, one that will carry them throughout the entire game and Angie joins the squad too and as much as I'd love to get into their relationship this post is far too long already and I wouldn't wanna waste anymore of your time. But! I hope this was enjoyable at the very least.

I really enjoy getting these asks because they always help me to flesh out the story and the characters and they're always super fun to write so if you ever wanna know about any of the other characters, don't hesitate to ask. Thanks for the ask!

[bondsmagii]

what embarassing/annoying things lgbt people do online? I dont spend a lot of time on the internet outside of my niche so im genuinely curious

god where do I even start… to be honest I’ve always been wary of communities in general because personal experience has taught me that things get weird fast, but I’ve never seen anything quite like LGBT circles online. some of the things I notice fairly frequently:

making everything about being LGBT to a freaky level; I just don’t think it’s healthy to have your gender and/or sexuality be your entire personality

related to this, making everything the x experience – the gay experience, the trans experience, etc. many of the things mentioned are things that everyone experiences, and most disturbingly, many of the things lauded as the x experience are actually symptoms of extreme trauma (feeling like there’s something inherently wrong with you, feeling lonely, constantly yearning but not knowing for what, etc). even if this trauma is related to your being LGBT, it isn’t healthy and people shouldn’t be accepting it as normal and encouraging it in others. trauma isn’t natural.

the top/bottom thing. like. ugh. I’m a dude in a relationship with another dude so this really makes me uncomfortable. the importance put on if someone is a top or a bottom, assigning personality traits to people based on this, saying stupid shit like “bottoms can’t park” or whatever, and just the extreme fascination with if someone is a top or a bottom… it’s very fetishising. even if people are talking about themselves, that’s still a detail of your sexual life that I do not want to know. it’s not appropriate to talk like that in front of strangers.

going on from this, how overly sexual a large chunk of the community seems to be. it’s not appropriate. I know this one isn’t LGBT specific, but in my personal experiences my straight/cis friends do not talk like this, but if someone finds out I’m LGBT too, they seem to think it’s fine to start talking in detail about their sex life/ask me invasive questions about mine. it’s not fine.

the really fetishising treatment of male/male couples even in the LGBT community is really… not good. my relationship isn’t a cute commodity that only exists for your fandoms.

the misandry is absolutely atrocious. lesbians are out there thinking it’s fine to declare men useless just because they don’t need us for sex; bi women are out there lamenting the fact they’re attracted to us disgusting men and why couldn’t they just be a lesbian. I’ve even seen bi women say they’re going to just ignore their attraction to men and choose women, perpetrating harmful myths that a) you can choose your sexuality and b) bisexuals are just faking and are capable of just “picking a side”.

the community has an extreme problem with policing one another and a lot of issues that they spend time and energy debating are pointless and just stupid, if I’m honest.

the fact that vehement hate is seen as OK so long as it’s directed against straight, cis people. it’s not.

the fact that cis, straight people can’t even mention the above point without being ripped apart, ridiculed, harrassed, insulted, and threatened is also not OK.

the diluting of actual important terms. “transphobia” and “homophobia” grow murkier by the day; people are being accused of these incredibly serious prejudices over stupid Tumblr arguments that rarely have anything to do with actual issues or aggressions.

the idea that if you’re LGBT you’re automatically free of blame, innocent, can do no wrong, etc. there are nasty people of every gender and sexuality. you’re not except from being abusive, oppressive, etc just because you yourself are a minority.

the fact that people out there reclaiming “queer” think they can call everyone in the LGBT community “queer” and if someone protests they’re “speaking over” them or setting back the movement or whatever. I have no problem if you identify that way, but I am not queer. I’m bi.

at least on this website it’s L rather than LGBT: ➡ gay men are shat on almost as badly as straight men, unless they’re trans, and then they’re treated like cute uwu transboys who are somehow exempt from the hatred levelled at cis men, proving that these people don’t see them as “real” men. ➡bi people (if acknowledged as bi and not just the umbrella term “gay”) suffer from a whole lot of internal prejudices, with bi women being seen/encouraged to be “lesbians” and bi men just not fucking mentioned at all. also we’re usually completely forgotten about; characters can’t be bi, they have to be gay (and shipping them with a member of the opposite sex is seen as “erasure”) or they’re straight. ➡ trans people get incredible amounts of transphobia within the community from cis LGBT people; trans men, as mentioned above, aren’t treated as “real” men and are seen as Men Lite™, and the arguments for this (that they don’t share the same chemical biology as men; that they were “raised as girls”) are transphobic and also dysphoric as hell. trans women get shit from all sides and there’s an incredible TERF problem in the community, especially among lesbians. 

basically everyone is infighting, perpetrating harmful myths, speaking over people, forcing adherence to behaviours many might not be comfortable with, and generally being generalising, inappropriate, and wholly embarrassing. the way the community has got on over the last few years alone has probably set the movement back a decade.

[roaminginspiration]

Before The Last Grain

My first true AU ever! No Avengers at all. I hope you’ll enjoy!

Chapter 1

Time is a strange concept. It's impalpable yet heavily perceptible. It can make a moment linger forever or go by fleetly. It stretches or shrinks. It is mysterious and unfathomable.

Or so, it was.

It all changed fifteen years ago when scientists finally deciphered its secret code. At a time when divorces were skyrocketing in the world, a company came up with an algorithm capable of determining when you were to meet your significant other and encapsulated it in the modest form of a watch.

LOVE IS ONLY A TICK AWAY the slogan read on every TV commercial and banner in the streets and online.

Skepticism gave way to curiosity and hope. And as hard as it was to admit— and still is for some — the Watch had startling results. Every encounter predicted led to a successful relationship. Love blossomed everywhere and never perished. The divorce rate fell significantly across the world and the efficiency of the Watch became indisputable.

The principle is astoundingly simple. The Watch activates around the wrist of the wearer the first time it is worn and sets automatically. When the countdown reaches 0, which means you are standing in front of your soulmate, it beeps (along with theirs) then turns off completely.

Of course, a small, trivial object with such power stirs strong opinions. People began to argue over it — some asked to make it illegal and have it banned. The initiative was strongly supported by the main Churches, but not only. Over time, — after the heated debate wore off—, you could pretty much find three categories of people. The overwhelming majority — who wore the Watch and waited expectantly waited for the last tick; the minority — those who'd refused to buy or activate it altogether; and those who knew, but vehemently tried to fight against fate...at their own scale.

Now, whether people live by or abhor it, the Watch has become a trivial object omnipresent in your everyday life. Like a phone or tablet.

The many people currently bustling in the small Manhattan coffee shop are walking past, waiting in line for their orders with a Watch around their wrist. Or not. It's something you don't dwell on.

Natasha Romanoff is sipping coffee at her usual table by the window, right next to the tall plant. She looks up from the book she's reading and notices a man is staring at her from the sugar counter across the room. She dismisses it and goes on to take another sip before resuming her reading. Her cup is nearly empty when a tall, broad figure comes to stand above her.

"Excuse me," a male voice calls. She takes her eyes off of the page and looks up. It is the same man from earlier. He's holding his cup and has a notebook clutched under his arm.

His blue eyes stare into hers with an unexpected combination of boldness and bashfulness.

"I couldn't help admiring you from across the room and, as I was about to leave, I thought I had to take a chance and come and speak to you."

She raises her eyebrow. His advances certainly are flattering. And she'll admit, he is strikingly handsome. His sharp, square jaw, his full lips, and the golden hair, without mentioning his incredible athletic figure — the man has it all.

"May I?" he asks, pointing at the chair across from her.

She nods. He smiles and sits down. He puts down on the table what she realizes is a leather sketchbook, creased in the middle for often being folded with the corners worn out. He attentively watches her.

“You come here a lot?” he asks.

“Probably more than I should,” she says with a smirk. “You?”

“First time, actually. And I’m glad I did.”

The smirk tugging at his lips is compelling. Almost irresistible.

“Yeah. Their lattes sure are the best,” she chimes in. Her humor makes him smile.

They chat, mostly banter in the most natural and familiar way until he finally asks:

“Can I give you my number? See how things could develop…”

She eyes him without a word.

“They wouldn’t develop much unless you are…,” she trails off as she pulls up her sleeve, “3 months, 5 days and 37 minutes early.”

He brushes his thumb over his bottom lip with a slightly stern expression. He takes a breath in and leans back on the chair. His eyes dive into hers, unwavering.

“You didn’t come off as the type to wear the Watch,” he says. He doesn’t sound disappointed or judging. Maybe the contrary intrigued and willing to tackle that unexpected challenge.

“I like to keep people on their toes.”

“3 months, huh? That’s quite close,” he comments.

She smiles unabashedly. He nods to himself.

“I’ll admit I didn’t see this hold-up coming but I’m a good judge of character.”

“And?” she cocks an eyebrow.

He extends his forearms on the table and leans over, creating an unsettling kind of intimacy.

“You’re not the type to let an algorithm take control of your life.”

His bold statement and the quiet confidence he displays draw her in. She smiles and glances away quietly.

“Or maybe I believe in destiny.” A short, contemplative silence follows.

He quickly looks at the clock on the wall across.

“Time seems to be against us today. But I’m pretty stubborn. What’s your name?” he asks, casually.

“Natasha.”

It makes him smile. “Let’s make a deal, Natasha,” he purrs her name like hot and sweet liquor. “If we meet again, you’ll owe me a date. It’ll be my honor to ask you out again.”

“Why would I make such a deal?” she questions daringly.

“Because if we meet again we can definitely agree it was meant to be, right?”

The corner of his mouth curls up. He takes his sketchbook, folds it under his arm then gets up. As he walks away, she calls out.

“If I choose to honor this deal, I should at least know your name.”

His large shoulders spin around. He smiles triumphantly.

“Steve Rogers.”

That evening Natasha Romanoff comes home from work and smiles as she finds herself almost wishing to meet that stranger in the coffee shop again.

_____________________________

2 MONTHS, 30 DAYS, 18 HOURS, 12 MINUTES AND 33 SECONDS

And indeed, they do. It happens very randomly about a week later. Natasha is chatting alongside her colleague and friend Maria Hill at a fancy but relaxed banquet party they have been invited to when she sees him, watching her from across the room. He is standing with a group of people who are laughing loudly, totally oblivious of the scene that seems to unfold in slow motion.

He is wearing an elegant black shirt with sleeves rolled halfway up his forearms with a pair of black trousers. It strikingly contrasts with his light hair and turquoise blue eyes. He is a guest, too, but he has the attention of half the females in the audience without even trying. But he doesn’t seem to notice. His eyes are fixed on her with a satisfying smirk playing on his lips.

He lets the moment linger as a way to savor his victory. And oddly perhaps, she is too. Maybe she likes the thrill of this adventurous curve in the straight and steady path lying ahead of her.

She whispers a couple of words into Maria’s ear, apologizes to her company and goes out on the large terrace looking over Manhattan and its skyline. It only takes a few seconds before she hears him approach.

“Quite a lovely evening, isn’t it?” he says after standing by the guardrail.

“And full of surprises,” she finishes with a smile.

She turns to face him. “Ok, what’s your secret? How’d you know you’d find me here?”

He leans an elbow on the rail and turns towards her, too.

“I didn’t. I’m pleasantly surprised too, to be honest.”

She snorts and shakes her head, then gazes at the floodlit landscape in front of them.

“So how come you were invited? Who are you friends with?”

He points at the exuberant man giving a grandiloquent speech to his assembly.

“I’m Tony Stark’s lawyer.”

She nods to herself. “I guess that explains the whole ‘good judge of character’ talk.”

“Becoming his lawyer may not have been my brightest moment,” he jokes. “And you?”

“I’m a pianist. Stark has been funding many of my concerts across the city.”

“You must be very good at it, then. Tony doesn’t choose to be someone’s patron lightly.”  

She smiles silently. She can feel his expectant gaze upon her.

“So…Natasha, will you have dinner with me? And who knows? I might even surprise you.”

His boyish smile forces a giggle out of her. She reaches over to take the flute of champagne in his hand and takes a sip.

“Maybe you already have,” she murmurs.  

_______________________________

The date was agreed on for the following Friday in a busy street in Brooklyn. She finds him standing on the sidewalk, hands in his pockets. He is wearing a dark brown leather jacket. She has put on a pair of blue high-waist jeans with a silky maroon cropped top with a jacket. Her hair is up in a bun.

He flashes a wide when he sees her coming up.

“You look stupendous,” he says. For a pair of jeans and a jacket?

“That’s…quite an enthusiastic response.”

He chuckles. “You’ll understand later.”

“So where are we going?” she asks.

“I know a local Italian around the corner. It’s been open for as far as I can remember.”

They make their way there. The interior is as modest as the outside façade. It surprises her — not a common choice for a Wall Street lawyer. He’s not trying to dazzle her and she likes it.

“Steve!” a man calls loudly in a thick Italian accent. He warmly shakes his hand and taps his shoulder then turns to greet Natasha with the same friendly enthusiasm. “Welcome to Giovanni’s, darling. I have kept the best table for you.”

They go and sit and Giovanni lights up the half-used candle.

“They serve the best lasagna. I know, I’ve tried at other places.”

Giovanni casts him the glare. Steve gulps. “Not that many.”

The wine is exquisite in an authentic type of way. There is nothing glittery or arrogant at Giovanni’s but it’s charming all the same. She can see why he’s chosen this place for their first date.

"Of course we could only meet again, and in these circumstances. This is Tony Stark's world and we all live in it," she remarks and they both laugh.

The conversation eventually shifts to the Watch.

“What’s your story? Why aren’t you wearing one?”

“Why should I?” he laughs. “Half my family is obsessed with it and I’m not sure they are any happier.”

“So your family doesn’t share your views?”

“The day my parents got theirs it struck the end of their marriage. My father was never truly involved anyways; it simply gave him an excuse to leave us. My mom’s Watch beeped eventually and she re-married. He’s a nice guy; his wife had passed many years before. They’re doing well. His son — my step-brother — who’s about my age, has patiently been waiting for his Watch to beep.”

“And what’s so wrong about it?” she asks.

He shakes his head. “Call me old-fashioned or stubborn, but I like the idea that I have chosen the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.”

“Some people need a little help, sometimes. It is scary to fall in love.”

“It’s always been. I’m not scared to have my heart broken so long as I allowed it to work.”

She eyes him from behind her glass of red wine.

“You think people don’t fall in love nowadays?”

He stares into her emerald eyes. “I think they forget to be spontaneous.”

They’re words she hasn’t heard in years and that bring back fond nostalgia.

“Spontaneous?” she trails off as she plays with the spoon of her dessert. “Show me.”

He cracks a smile.

He lays bills on the table and gets up, flaunts his leather jacket over his shoulder then stretches a hand out to her. “I was hoping you would ask.”

She looks up at him with inquisitive but beguiled eyes then glances down at his hand. She gently slips her fingers onto his palm.

A couple of minutes later, they are walking along the street. He halts and looks at her.

“Why are we stopping?” she asks.  

He smiles. “Our ride is here.”

She stares in disbelief at the big motorcycle parked behind him. She chuckles.

“You’re the first lawyer I meet who rides one of these!”

“I guess I like to keep people on their toes,” he echoes her words, earning a smirk from her, then leans over to get the helmet. He steps in front of her and gently lays it on her head. He then fastens the clip.

He teasingly pokes the tip of her nose with his finger. “It looks cute on you.”

He puts his helmet on and straddles the motorcycle. She watches with an agape mouth — what a sight!

“When you’re ready,” he says kindly.

Her heartbeat quickens. The exhilaration is slowly surging up her body. It feels like old times again. She smiles and gives an encouraging nod to herself before getting on. Her hands gently slip around his waist.

The engine roars fiercely. It sends shivers down her spine. Steve pulls back slowly then engages on the road. As they enter the freeway, his hand swiftly pulls around the handle, launching the bike forward. Her fingers grasp the fabric of his shirt. They soon get away from the bustling city and the light turns dim as they dive into the night. Steve drives fast along the deserted roads lined with trees. She slowly looks up and catches sight of the thousand stars glowing in the sky. It seems like ages since she last saw them.

The mild air sweeps across her face and she breathes in the scent of humid grass and leaves. She loosens her grip and bends backward, taking in the view, enjoying the moment. She lets out a joyful and carefree squeal whose echo dies down in the distance. He smiles from where he is sitting.

Thirty minutes, he pulls over on the side of a quiet rural road. They are both leaning on the bike, gazing at the splendorous untouched nature in front of them.

She taps her finger on the screen of her Watch.

“My father bought it for me when it came out. I’d just turned 18. He had great hopes for me which involved being in a happy marriage and having children. But I wasn’t ready for any of it. I was…,” she smiles blankly, “rebellious. Hardly contented with anything. I took his gift as a leash so I protested. Commitment meant little to me. I’d date around for the sake of proving I could. Then I met this guy, a singer, he offered me my ticket out. I went with him on a tour around Europe. It was fun, and I felt free. Alive.” She pauses and takes a deep breath in. “My father had a heart attack. He died alone and it took days before someone even realized and found him. It took even longer before I came back and claimed his body. After that, I saw why family was important. And I put the Watch on.”

She turns to look at him with watery eyes and shrugs slightly as she sniffs and forces a smile. “Never took it off once ever since.”

Steve is watching her quietly. She notices his eyes are slightly gleaming too under the moonlight. “I’m sorry,” he says.

She shakes her head. “It’s ok. It was years ago. Anyways, when I came back I settled down and resumed my studies. I started a new life and it hasn’t been an unhappy one so far.”

The corner of his mouth goes up slightly. “Has it been a happy, fulfilling one, though?”

She runs her fingers through her hair. “I don’t know. It’s been so long. But it feels safe.”  

“I get it. I really do.”

They look at each other without a word. She bites her bottom lip and shuts her eyelids. Her mind runs through a thousand thoughts, once of which is far more obsessive than the others and she can no longer pretend to ignore. Looking back at him staring at her with such candor and yearning, she feels the pull to lean in.

She makes a resolute nod and stands on her feet. She turns to face him.

“If we’re doing this,” she begins, “we can’t get attached. We’re just being spontaneous and going along with it…for the time it lasts.”

Still sitting on the bike, he looks at her with meek, but lustful, eyes. He looks down and shakes his head, snorting.

“Natasha. I like you,” he admits. “I like you. I think part of me will always want more but I can’t risk losing it all for being too greedy. We’ll go with your terms.”

She smiles. “Great,” she says and holds her hand up to make it an official shake.

He laughs softly. He swiftly puts a hand to her waist and pulls her to him, crushing his lips against hers, sealing the deal with a kiss.

2 MONTHS, 28 DAYS, 14 HOURS, 41 MINUTES AND 7 SECONDS

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Christie!

You have been accepted for the role of non-biography character DEDALUS DIGGLE with the faceclaim of Amadeus Serafini! We love reading about your Diggle! He was such a delight. We especially enjoyed the family section, which has been less-than-thrilled with his activism, along with the prejudice section that showed Dedalus not always taking the time to listen to those with less privilege. It shines a particularly real light, right now especially. So happy to have you apart of this roleplay!  

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Christie

AGE: 20

TIMEZONE: GMT+3

ACTIVITY LEVEL: I’m a uni student who’s almost done with her deadlines so very soon I’ll have a lot of free time and I’d love to dedicate it to further developing Dedalus in this group. This might be subject to change if I actually manage to get a job (fingers crossed) but I’m sure I’ll still have time to do replies and just interact with people in general at least a few times a week. Plus my weekends are free for the foreseeable future so there’s always that!

ANYTHING ELSE: Nope

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Dedalus Diggle

AGE: 26

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: Cis male, he/him. He uses no labels for his sexuality – purely because he’s not currently aware of one that accurately describes him – but is very openly interested in people of all genders. Bisexuality is the term he’d consider closest to accurately describing his orientation, though it’s not quite right either. In modern terms, I’d say he’s pansexual.

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Ravenclaw

ANY CHANGES: –

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

Less is more has never been a philosophy that applies to Dedalus, not in any way, shape or form. He talks big, dreams even bigger, and the catch of it all is that nobody believes in what he says more than he himself does. Optimism or naivete, it’s hard to tell, but he has a great deal of both and somehow, for better or worse, the world hasn’t managed to run him down just yet. He’s open, and friendly, and so very excitable, and as much as that can be a strength, he’s also no stranger to taking things too far. He’s very familiar with social faux pas, whether as a result of not reading the room or simply of a miscalculated attempt to raise people’s spirits gone wrong.

It comes as no surprise that as a former Ravenclaw, his mind is his greatest weapon. Dedalus is very intelligent, though that might not be too obvious just from the way he behaves. Most people would probably perceive him as rather silly, really, if not downright bonkers since most of his ideas are very much outlandish. To say he struggles with expressing his ideas in a way they would make more sense would imply he actively tries to, which simply isn’t the case. He’s perfectly content in saying his piece and letting people dismiss him as somewhat of an oddball if they so wish.

Since his head is so often up in the clouds, however, it’s hard to keep track of what goes on on the ground. Dedalus is very much off in his own Dedalus-land most of the time, seeing and perceiving things purely the way he wants to, and in a sense, there’s definitely a disconnection between him and the rest of the world. He’s not necessarily aware of it either, but that doesn’t make it any less present.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY: 

The Diggle family currently consists of Delia, Samuel and Dedalus, not accounting for a variety of cousins whose names, quite frankly, Dedalus cannot remember for the life of him. Lots of D-names, he’d say at a guess; those always seem to be a hit within his family. And as far as his relationship with his parents goes, he tries not to think about it too much. It’s strained, without a doubt, though Dedalus doesn’t want to consider exactly how strained. They’ve always had their differences, ever since he’d been old enough to express an opinion, but for the past few years, he’s been slowly but surely distancing himself from them and they don’t seem to mind terribly much. They’re letting him live out his ‘rebellious phase’, they say and for Dedalus, that further solidifies the fact they don’t really know him at all. He’s always been somewhat of a disappointment, anyway; it’s no surprise they wouldn’t mind if people stopped associating him too much with the Diggle family.

Thinking back, they’d liked him much better before he’d started thinking for himself – back when he followed etiquette, when he spent time only with people who meant something in the Wizarding World, when he didn’t think too much about muggle-borns, and half-bloods, and all those little things he so likes to talk about these days. Delia and Samuel are much too dignified to publicly admit something as crude as the belief muggle-borns are less capable, less worthy, less, but, well, it’s true, isn’t it? They certainly wouldn’t bring up the topic in polite company, but facts are facts.

OCCUPATION: 

Owner of Dedalus Diggle’s Delights, a candy shop in Diagon Alley that he founded with his parents’ money back when he was twenty-one and they were becoming particularly unbearable with their admonishments and lectures on responsibility. It was simply a clever way to say ‘screw you’ at first – starting and running a proper business is hard work but Dedalus also takes immense pride in the fact that his parents could hardly say they’d expected this; after all, what said childish and irresponsible better than candy? In the past few years, however, Dedalus Diggle’s Delights has developed a bitter rivalry with Sugarplum’s Sweet Shop, though it is unclear whether Dedalus is the only one who really perceives it that way. Grudgingly, he will admit Sugarplum’s seems to be doing better at the moment but, he will also be quick to add, that is, of course, only because he hardly has the time to invest into his shop as he is just so very busy with his other job.

For the unenlightened, ‘other job’ refers to his little experiments, which isn’t really a proper job. Dedalus fancies himself a bit of a tinkerer, an innovator, and he spends most of his days crafting magical items with varying degrees of success. One you might be familiar with if you’ve spoken to him for longer than thirty seconds is his pocket watch. Quite the handy little thing, he won’t hesitate to let you know. Always knows your schedule and reminds you if you’re late for an appointment!

For the enlightened, however, ‘other job’ refers to his work for the Order – also not exactly a proper job, come to think of it. Dedalus is very dedicated to the cause and always eager to help even with the smallest of jobs. Newer members might appreciate the help at first, though conversations with Dedalus rarely end once the job is done so perhaps they’ve ought to know better by now than to accept his help unless they’ve got time to spare. His main job, the way he sees it, is to provide a different point of view, the more outlandish the better. No one can spark a conversation quite like Dedalus Diggle and he takes great pride in that.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER: 

Stepping out of character for this one – because while Dedalus has a lot of thoughts on his role within the Order, he does tend to see things in his own Dedalus way – I’d say that outside of helping wherever he’s needed and filling out empty roles on missions, the biggest asset he brings to the Order is his mind. He’s very good at taking a step back and providing a different perspective – granted, it’s usually a fairly outlandish perspective, but once stripped of its more fantastical elements, other members will often find there’s a lot of value in his input. He’d be perfect for an advisor if he only he was less… extraordinary in his ideas which often err on the side of impractical if not impossible. He personally calls it ‘dreaming big’ but you can see how that line is so easily crossed.

And speaking of big dreams and idealism, Dedalus very much believes the Order will prevail. He finds it easier than most might to shake off the small losses and disadvantages because in his head it’s simply impossible that the Order would lose. He’s very much a good versus evil kind of guy and in his head, the Order represents good and thus will always prevail. It would be absolutely fascinating to explore how bigger losses (ex: the death of James) might change things as far as Dedalus’ belief, certainty and, to a degree, naivete go, and how those potential change might manifest.

While I imagine his dedication and input are enough to qualify him for the Inner circle, Dedalus, unfortunately, is also much too absentminded to be trusted with the most important of the Order’s secrets and decisions. He’s no stranger to slipping up and admitting things he’s not supposed to be sharing, and while it’s usually small things and he’s pretty good at playing up the ’I’m just a random weirdo, don’t mind what I’m saying’ card, I can’t imagine the Order would be willing to risk it. And so he is a mid-level member, but the higher-ups are probably still careful and quite possibly only ever tell him the bare minimum he needs to know.

SURVIVAL: 

As mentioned, Dedalus very much lives in his own world to a certain extent. He sees things the same everybody else does, but his interpretations are almost always positive and optimistic in favour of himself and the Order. This is more in terms of mentality, as far as survival goes, but I do feel that’s also something very important to consider. At the moment, I’d say he’s in a pretty good mental state in the sense that he’s mostly content and the horrors of war haven’t managed to quite make an impact. If he were to become disillusioned – which I personally think is really only a matter of time – that would certainly change things and survival might just become a whole lot harder.

Outside of his own head, he’s got it pretty easy when compared to most. His parents are wealthy and mostly happy to let him have his ‘rebellious phase’ for a while longer which as far as they’re aware consists purely of Dedalus foregoing all pureblood etiquette and expectations. Hardly anyone suspects his affiliation with the Order due to how absent-minded and irresponsible he comes across as, though he himself has had a few close calls with accidentally exposing himself; luckily, people are used to him talking nonsense and it’s not hard for him to cover up his near slip-ups as more mindless prattle.

RELATIONSHIPS: 

If Dedalus had his way, he’d spend days and days just chatting with people. They wouldn’t even need to say anything back – he has more than enough to say on a multitude of topics and he can absolutely hold an entire conversation, an argument even, all by himself. All the better if there’s someone to nod along.

That said, here are some ideas I had after browsing some bios/apps (that are of course just my interpretation and completely a subject to change after chatting with the other writers!):

Gideon Prewett: With how people seem to go to him for advice and how he brings stability to the Order, I think he could be someone to balance Dedalus out. Dedalus has good ideas and even better intentions, but in reality, his ideas are only worth executing after they’ve been sufficiently dialled down and their more outlandish elements have been worked out.

Amos Diggory: Just based off of their jovial, friendly personalities, I think Dedalus and Amos would get on like a house on fire. Dedalus would certainly enjoy his presence, be it for a quick chat or a smoke, and I think they have the potential to be great friends.

Emmeline Vance: Emmeline and Dedalus seem to share an interest in figuring out how things work and it would be so cool to explore their dynamic especially since I also love the contrast between her, who is so easy to overlook, and Dedalus, who doesn’t let people look anywhere but at him.

Hestia Jones: With how good Hestia is at thinking outside the box, I feel she and Dedalus are definitely kindred spirits in that sense. But while her ideas might get shot down, people listen to Dedalus and maybe that can cause some friction between them.

Ndulue Travers: I came across the “Do they have money? Flair? A sense of humour and an ability to hold their liquor? Let’s be friends!” part of their app and Dedalus definitely has all of the above, even if his ability to hold his liquor is a bit questionable. Oh, well. He’d argue it makes things more fun anyway.

Edgar Bones: Similar to Gideon, I feel like he’d be a good foil for Dedalus. Dedalus spends more time with his head in the clouds rather than his feet on the ground so he definitely needs someone who leans more towards the opposite to keep him grounded – or to clash with, though Dedalus rarely if ever looks for confrontation.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: Oh, man, I’d be open to exploring just about any ship with Dedalus. He’s very much a ‘try everything at least once’ type of guy so honestly, he himself is very open to all kinds of romantic and sexual relationships too.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE? 

Dedalus likes to think of himself as a very progressive wizard indeed; he almost makes it a point to always be the most open and accepting he can be. His intentions are good and his actions are genuine though I do imagine it might not come across this way to some – after all, if he’s trying that hard to show everybody how open-minded he is, surely he’s got something to hide or make up for, no? Then there’s also the other side of this double-edged knife – at what point does he become too progressive? For example, he might be pretty quick to forgive a person for calling a muggle-born a ‘mudblood’ if they show some remorse – even if it’s not his place, as a pureblood, to forgive such a thing. Dedalus would be the first to shake hands with a werewolf, the first to loudly point out and draw attention to the accomplishments of muggle-borns – but in a weird way, the last one to think to double-check with them if his ‘activism’ is even wanted.

But come on, does he really mean all that? At his core, Dedalus has very much grown up in a pureblood society, as much as he might’ve been a black sheep in a lot of ways. He’s trying very hard to unlearn those prejudiced ideas, but often they would still be very present in his initial reactions. In a way, his avid desire to always be almost excessively open-minded is indeed trying to make up for something i.e. his previous pureblood habits and values.

This is, naturally, also very connected to the privileges he already has. He is a white man from a pureblood family. Although his behaviour is a far cry from what would be expected of him, he, without a doubt, still retains a big part of those privileges, with his parents and I imagine fellow purebloods assuming the mentality that this is his ‘rebellious phase’ that he will soon grow out of. That said, I do think quite a few people might find his promiscuity quite distasteful – not only does he not hide his dalliances with wix and muggles alike but he almost seems to flaunt them.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? I’ve had so many ideas about Dedalus Diggle for such a long time, but unfortunately, I’ve never really had the chance to properly explore and develop him as a character. I think this rp will be a great fit both for the sort of dynamics I would like to explore with Dedalus and for what he has to bring to the table too. I think he’s got very particular energy about him and I also think it would mesh well with the general vibe of this rp.

PLOT DROP IDEAS (OPTIONAL): Generally speaking, Dedalus is always down for a good party and it would be very much in-character for him to host one at some point.

ANYTHING ELSE? –

EXTRA FOR NON-BIO CHARACTERS:

PAST: 

Born as the sole heir to Delia and Samuel Diggle, Dedalus was no stranger to getting pampered while growing up. The newest, shiniest toys, the most expensive, highest quality clothes, pretty much everything he owned had some sort of a superlative attached to it. He revelled in it all, took to luxury like a fish to water, and was perfectly happy to play the role of the polite little heir as long as it got him what he wanted. “What a charming boy,” distant and not-so-distant cousins would exclaim and pinch his cheeks. “How well-behaved, how polite!”

Unfortunately, good manners lost all appeal by the time left for Hogwarts. It was just so boring, being nice and perfect all the time, and Dedalus began to push, trying to see how far he could go before his parents had enough. Apparently, quite far. It was incredible what Delia and Samuel – and, to an extent, their entire society – would excuse as ‘normal teenage boy affairs’.

With time, his clothes turned more extravagant though no less expensive. His circle of friends widened much beyond fellow purebloods and even included a muggle or two. His sexual and romantic experiments were practically public knowledge – his mother had nearly had a heart attack when one of her closest friends had once brought up his muggle-born boyfriend during brunch.

By the time he graduated, Dedalus had more or less solidified his status as the rebellious son of the Diggle family. So, he figured, might as well take it a step further. His beliefs had changed over the course of the past few years and Dedalus had no intention of hiding that. In fact, it was quite the opposite – he spoke up, often and loudly, about how muggle-borns weren’t treated fairly, about how werewolves were misunderstood, about how pureblood ideals were outdated and unfounded. It was easy to dismiss him, with his purple top hat and his fancy waistcoat, and his natural joie de vivre didn’t help his quest of being taken seriously either. But eventually, the right people took notice of him and the Order welcomed him.

PRESENT: 

Currently, Dedalus spends his days one of three ways. If he is needed at the Order or something of particular importance is happening, he dedicates all his time helping. He’s still very eager and enthusiastic about the cause and while some might believe every day brings them closer to victory, Dedalus thinks it’s quite the opposite. But of course, he’d reassure people, every revolution has its troubles and complications. You lose some and then you win some, that’s just how life goes.

And if his services aren’t needed with the Order, he tinkers. He’s always had a quiet passion for tinkering – just about the only thing quiet about him, really – and he’s been slowly but surely perfecting his craft through trial and error. He has grand plans for his creations, from helping the Order to mass-producing some of them one day, and he’s perfectly happy to let his hobby consume all his free time.

Lastly, he doesn’t do this often although he probably should, but Dedalus is known to pay some attention to Dedalus Diggle’s Delights every now and then. Mostly, he just lets other people handle the different parts of the business, but occasionally, he takes some interest in it himself. On these days, he’d be manning the counter and taking every chance to chat more to his customers and get some valuable feedback.

FC CHOICES: Amadeus Serafini, Jack Falahee, James Bay

[hellzyeahwebwielingessays]

The Not-So-Amazing Mary Jane Part 29: AMJ #4.1

Previous Part

Next Part

Master Post

I don’t have any preamble. Let’s just get on with this.

Thankfully the recap page isn’t as bad as in prior issues.

First of all, we get yet more information not introduced in the earlier issues. Admittedly this is a minor point, but Ken Gullapalli’s last name is first revealed here. Additionally, we get the title of the movie repeated her, even though it has yet to be mentioned in-story.

More significantly, the recap ascribes additional motivations to the Savage Six. It claims that they took umbrage with Mysterio’s life being dramatized at all, whereas prior issues never implied that. Isn’t it great that part of the motivation for the villains is being explained in the recap page.

Another minor point worth noting is that the recap mixes up the sequence of events. It claims Sonny Diperna joined the movie and then the Savage Six attacked. It was actually the other way around. Also, the recap claims the movie lost all but one investor. Depending upon how you wish to interpret that line, it might also be called inaccurate. The investor they found in issue #2 was never one of the original investors. The movie lost all  of it’s investors but then found a new one.

Neither of these are that big of a deal. But those are pretty basic thing for a recap  to screw up. It’s another example to the shoddy production of this comic (outside the art).

The story proper picks up immediately where the last issue left off. Charlie (the actor playing Spider-Man) quits, claiming the production is cursed. He points out everything has gone wrong, even before the crew were attacked by actual super villains.

MJ counters that things have been looking up since they found a new secure location. Charlie though points out this ‘secure location’ is an abandoned zoo too horrible for anyone to even want to attack them. Charlie accuses MJ of being delusional for believing in the movie.

You know I never had anything to say about Charlie up until now, but in this moment he is the single most relatable character in the whole story.

What’s ambiguous is Williams’ own perception of the character. He’s clearly been framed in an unsympathetic light (and will be again in consequent pages) so the audience isn’t supposed to like him. And yet he is keeping it real, he is pointing out every danger and problem with the production and why it isn’t safe.

I don’t know if he’s intended to be an audience avatar, and author avatar or both. But he’s certainly my  avatar right now.

Charlie’s rant continues by claiming people are going to laugh at Sonny Diperna and MJ for participating in this disaster of a movie. ‘McKnight’ then gets up in Charlie’s personal space and grabs him by the shirt. He yells that speaking to MJ the way he did would have gotten him fired anyway. With Mallorie’s prompting, ‘McKnight’ tells Charlie that he’ll be returning the advance he was given for the scene he’s left unfinished.

Charlie though has other ideas.

Charlie wasn’t exactly being rude. The worst thing he said was that MJ was being delusional. Putting aside how she genuinely has been, in context it’s a perfectly valid thing to say. MJ has been pushing and backing an extremely troubled production that has genuinely intimidated Charlie and jeopardised his wellbeing. Last issue alone confirmed several cast and crewmembers had quite the production after the Six’s attack.

Even if it wasn’t fair to call MJ delusional (which it absolutely is), in context Charlie’s outburst is totally sympathetic, it’s something the cast and crew should be able to excuse given the situation. Not to mention, he’s outright warning  MJ. He’s informing her she is endangering her career and public image by participating in the film. I’m not saying this is outright concern, but on balance his dialogue to MJ is not exactly rude. He’s justifiably upset and is pointing out the dangers to MJ.

Beck in this scene is problematic. I’m not going to say he assaulted  Charlie, but he was way out of line for grabbing him the way he did. That should b the umpteenth warning sign to MJ (who noticeably does nothing) that Beck is bad news and dangerous.

I also detest the framing of Beck in this page. He’s framed as someone defending MJ’s honour, or at the very least a loyal friend. It’s yet more of this messed up sympathetic/friendship portrayal of Beck and his relationship with Mary Jane.

Finally, notice how no one is considering how Charlie’s departure seriously jeopardises the crew. He is now someone constantly off set who knows exactly where the crew are. Do they consider changing location? No. Do they consider that the Six will target Charlie for information no. It’s stupid enough that they aren’t involving the authorities at all. But if you accept that then it’s really stupid for them to not consider Charlie a liability.

On the next page Charlie tries to blackmail ‘McKnight’. He threatens to call his guild rep and report unsafe working conditions; citing the Six’s attack. That is unless he’s allowed to keep his advance. ‘McKnight’ literally tosses cash at Charlie and tells him to leave.

I have nothing really to say about this page. It’s just kind of screwed up that Williams has chosen to make the one character  who’s talking some sense unsympathetic.

On the next page MJ proposes that she will play (a fully masked) Spider-Man in the final scene. She suggests Beck use his skills to ‘heavily edit’ the footage to make her look convincing.

Okay, so this is a double-edged sword.

On the plus side we’re finally dealing more with MJ actually acting  in a mini-series set up to be about that very premise. Having her pretend to be her lover is also a brilliant set up for character exploration. Have MJ, in an abstract way, see Peter in a new light by pretending to be him. But the potential for interesting commentary goes deeper, because she’s acting out Mysterio’s vision for Spider-Man. It’s an opportunity for Williams to explore MJ and Mysterio’s contrasting views of Spidey. That in turn could say a lot about MJ and Beck, as well as Peter himself.

But on the other hand…isn’t this pretty dumb?

Peter and Mary Jane have completely different body builds. According to official stats, Peter is 2 inches taller than her and weights nearly 50 pounds more than her. Then of course you have the fact that Spider-MAN has a MALE body shape and Mary Jane has a FEMALE body shape. And what about the dialogue? How is MJ supposed to convincingly pull off Charlie’s voice?

Oh, sure Beck’s skills are more than capable of faking the difference. But what is the point?

Why use Mary Jane when you could just use any of the actual men on set?

Master Matrix is in that very scene. His body build might not be identical to Spider-Man’s, but it looks similar enough. Or at the very least it looks far more similar than MJ’s body build does.

In fairness, I don’t know much about Master Matrix, so maybe he’s not capable of the physical movements necessary for the job; he is a robot after all. But there are definitely, other  male crewmembers on set. The Kangaroo for example is an actual super villain, he’s literally battled Spider-Man and he also has a far similar body build to Spidey than MJ does.

One might argue that it’s not all about the body type though, they need someone who can act the part, deliver the dialogue. Except if that’s the case, why get MJ? She’s a talented actress but she’ll be wearing a mask, her facial acting will be moot. This means it will just boil down to her ability to voice act, but she is neither  trained VA nor would she believably sound like Charlie/Spider-Man. Realistically ‘McKnight’ would have to use technical wizardry to distort MJ’s voice into sounding like Charlie’s. That’s more than likely within his abilities (especially with master Matrix and HERBIE’s help). But you know what would be much easier? Having someone else dub over the footage!

That’d be a lot cheaper, easier and more dramatically effective than altering the vocal performance of the actor in the suit. In fact, given how the mask is realistically going to muffle the voice of the wearer, ADR would likely be employed anyway. If memory serves I think they have done that in every real life Spider-Man film since 2002. Hell, Darth Vader  was brought to life with a suit and a voice performance.

The point is Beck wouldn’t need  someone in the suit who can deliver dialogue great, so why not get someone with a closer body build?

Shit, if he’s employed so much of his illusionary skills anyway, why not just fake Spider-Man himself? Jesus, Christ he could just make a Spider-Man robot if he wanted or dress up one of the X-Men robots from issue #1.

Or he  could play Spider-Man himself. He literally did that in his first ever appearance!

No matter how you slice it, this is yet another interesting idea Williams fails to sufficiently justify.

Moving on, remember how the worst thing Charlie did was call MJ delusional? Remember how Beck took this as an immense insult? Yeah, well he immediately does the same thing on the next page.

Beck explains he’s very uncomfortable with MJ playing that role. MJ retorts that it’s just one scene and since audiences would be none the wiser it wouldn’t affect her character’s arc. She starts to suggest Beck use his illusions to affect the change but Beck interjects that that’d be cheating and would ruin the authenticity of his work. MJ counters that she’s the most ‘authentic connection to Spidey’ Beck will find.

Beck accepts MJ’s offer. He reminisces that MJ was supposed to play his love interest, a version of someone he wanted to exalt. He then acknowledges MJ has become the saving grace of the movie, making her the second  woman who had the ‘misfortune’ of believing in him. He further elaborates that they’ve strayed so far from his original vision for the film, he sometimes questions if it’s even the same movie.  MJ reassures him that he’s just pivoted.

While this conversation is happening, Mallorie is dealing with another issue. Sonny Diperna has been running late because the paparazzi were tipped off about his inclusion. As a result he can’t get close to the set’s location without revealing it’s location. Mallorie turns to Screwball who launches several remote controlled drones.

A few things to unpack from these pages.

The first is that MJ has it in mind for Beck to use his illusions to finish the scene; something Beck ultimately agrees to. If they were just going to use illusions anyway why do they need MJ specifically to finish the scene? Again they could just get any of the male actors, extras or staff members to fill in.

Shit, they could get Screwball  to do it. These pages depict her acrobatic prowess; and weren’t the first to do so. Additionally she’s actually faced off against Spider-Man herself. Between the two of them Screwball is far more qualified than MJ in recreating Spider-Man’s movements and physical prowess. Her on set job also isn’t something necessary to film a scene. If she were in charge of lighting or the cameraperson then that’d be one thing. But she could almost do her job between takes or hand over her responsibilities to someone else temporarily.

MJ’s justification that she is the most authentic connection to Spider-Man is a moot point. Yeah, she has more of a connection to Spider-Man than anyone on set…and? Charlie had 0 connection to the real Spider-Man, and yet he was cast in the role and ideally would be finishing the movie. What on Earth does MJ’s personal connection to Spider-Man have to do with anything?

It can’t be some nonsense about her being able to act well in the scene. Again, realistically she’d be dubbed over and/or her voice would be distorted affecting any vocal performance she’d give. Not to mention her job wouldn’t be to draw upon her personal knowledge of Peter. It’d be to do what Beck would want of her, to bring his  vision of Spider-Man to life. At the same time her job would be to synch up as best as she could with Charlie’s performance in all the other scenes. She isn’t creating her take on Spider-Man from the ground up, therefore her ‘authentic connection’ is meaningless.

Also isn’t MJ smart to be hinting to the incredibly clever trickster that she’s got a personal connection to Spider-Man. It’s not like he could research her, learn she’s has (and has had in the past) long-term relationships with Peter Parker.

You know, that guy who famously took Spider-Man’s pictures for the longest time and created Spider-Man’s tech and had Spider-Man as his bodyguard when he ran Parker Industries. If you accept the (BS) post-OMD explanation that everything happened the same way but Pete and MJ just weren’t married then that means Beck could learnt his stuff with Google. This is evidenced by Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #1, wherein literal school children were able to look up Peter and learn about his relationship with Mary Jane.

Mary Jane realistically should already be wary of Beck handpicking her for the movie anyway. She should already suspect that that had something to do with her connection to Spidey. Not only did Williams ignore that, but now she’s just having MJ outright wink to Beck that she has a connection to Spider-Man. That’s not endangering herself, her family, her friends or Spidey’s identity now is it?

Let’s talk about Mysterio. So his dream was to make this biopic about himself. He’s got only a little time to make it before he is literally dragged back to Hell. He envisions it as his magnum opus. A chance to be forgiven by the masses and to make amends to his old flame Betsy. And he’s you know…super egotistical and selfish. His history reveals that to us. His original origin entails him wanting to steal Spider-Man’s limelight by framing him. A revised origin entails him feeling pushed aside in spite of his talent.

So is he really  going to compromise this much? Is he really going to so drastically revise the role of the one woman he arguably ever loved to this extent?

The answer is Hell no.

Remember when Beck assaulted someone in the first issue because they insulted his ego?

Remember when he delivered a grand speech about the meaning of art in issue #2?

Is he really  going to allow something so important to him be distorted this much? Is he really going to just meekly accept questioning if it’s even his vision anymore?

Again, Hell no, that’s not in character.

And MJ’s rationale is totally nonsensical from Beck’s POV. The whole point of MJ’s character was wrapped up in Beck’s affections for the real life woman she was playing. But now her role is totally unrecognizable from how he began. That’s not a pivot, it’s a wholesale change. Or at least, that’s how Beck would view it.

In the best-case scenario, we could interpret his attitude as evidence of insincerity. As in, he wasn’t actually all that hung up on ‘exalting’ Betsy. At which point MJ should be on her toes and concerned about how genuine he’s been about anything else. Then again she should’ve been at least wary long before now.

As for the other story thread in these pages, we’ll get to that in a little while.

On the next age, Diperna is confused as to who Screwball is. The paparazzi are following his car in several cars. That’s when Screwball’s drones show up and dazzle them with some flashing lights of their own.

Sonny’s confusion over Screwball is itself confusing because he was literally in the same scene as her in the last issue.

Additionally, it’s incredibly  dangerous to blind any drivers with flashing lights under any circumstances. Shit, when I was learning to drive it was drilled into me how dangerous it would be to be dazzled by another car and how to avoid accidentally dazzling them myself. Here Screwball is deliberately  dazzling three cars. Some of them have open tops and people practically hanging out of them unbuckled.

And on top of that they are clearly moving at speed, around a bend on some kind of upward slope. Accidentally dazzling them with regular car headlights would be a recipe for disaster. Here though, Screwball is using at least six drones to deliberately dazzle them. You can tell from the art and sound effects that one of the cars had to make an abrupt stop. We don’t know if the riders incurred any injuries from that alone but it would’ve been all too easy. Frankly it was really lucky no one was seriously hurt.

I guess you could justify this in a case of self-defence, but the paparazzi were not endangering Sonny’s life. Not unless you argue their cameras were themselves dazzling his driver. But it’s not clear that that was happening and even if it was, that’s not a justification for what Screwball did. Not to mention he could have ended any jeopardy the paparazzi posed by simply stopping the car, getting out and answering their questions. Sure he’d be late, but it’s a lot safer than the alternative. Besides he was already late and it’s publicity for the film.

I’m not suggesting this was out of character for Screwball. But I am saying MJ has just seen a criminal do something extremely  dangerous for no justifiable reason. Bu rights her judgement should no longer be reserved about Screwball as it was last issue. Not that it ever should have been. She should be telling Beck to get rid of her or at least try to keep her under control somehow.

Somehow I doubt that will happen.

By the way, the paparazzi are yelling at Diperna during the car chase…why? Neither he nor they could possibly hear one another in that situation.

I am going to leave it there for now as the next few pages are so bad I’ve decided to dedicate a whole post just to them before continuing onto the rest of the issue.

Previous Part

Next Part

Master Post

[multimetaverse]

Andi Mack 3x14 & 3x15 Reviews

Hammer Time and Unloading Zone were two good eps that were somewhat marred by filler. Let’s dig in!

Positives: 

It’s good to teach kids early that there’s no ethical consumption under capitalism. 

I’ll give them credit for not bearding TJ and for having him explicitly say that that he and Kira are not together. Also really drove home how petty and manipulative Kira is. 

The Tyrus scenes were brief but not as angsty as I thought. It’s very clear they’re pushing the bounds of subtext and showing that Cyrus has a crush on TJ and wants to make that known but of course we can’t start moving into text until after the cut episode. I think this is the ep that probably clues in the casual audience that Cyrus does in fact like TJ as more than a friend though knowledge that they’re being set up to be a couple won’t come until Something to Talk A-Boot (unless they happen to see the promo with the Bench scene).

They’ve clearly set up Buffy as Cyrus’ crush confidante, making sure all talk of TJ is kept away from Andi and Jonah which is sad but unsurprising. It wouldn’t shock me if Andi and Jonah don’t explicitly know about Cyrus’ crush until after the bench scene itself. Great to see Buffy being so encouraging although she can’t explicitly say anything yet. 

I wonder if that whole ‘’brings out his eyes’’ bit will come back during or after the bench scene. TJ is wearing a green shirt at the party that would bring out his eyes. Maybe that will be a Disney approved gay version of the typical straight guy calling his love interest pretty.

Those were some great Muffy scenes. I know there were some worries on tumblr about their chemistry after 3x13 but those should be put to rest now I think.

Extremely easy to see the Muffy arc ending in a kiss in the finale. 

Bringing Garren back was a very wise decision on the writers part. That ‘’ I want to cross the finish line’’ with you line was a great little nod to them being endgame. And that piggyback ride Marty gave Buffy was sweet. 

Really good subtle message sent by the camp out that it should be totally normal for a straight guy to have sleepovers with his gay friend. 

Andi’s line about Jonah maybe not being capable of more emotional connection than his usual 6 emojis is damning but I also wonder if it’s set up for him to subvert that when he sings You Girl.

A sad reminder about Amber’s awful home life. It’s clear she’s seeking the love and attention she’s not getting at home from her parents but Jonah is really not the solution. 

In 3x15 we get some foreshadowing for Buffy’s later foot injury

Nice to see Jonah participating in the protest and I always enjoy when they lean into Jonah being kind of dumb.

We still managed to get an Alpaca cameo after all. Also confirms that the original 3x18 at Snuck Farm was indeed planned as the original wedding. 

The don’t hurt yourself lines Cyrus and Jonah had were very funny. 

Cyrus referenced the Tunguska event most likely

Lauren Tom knocked it out of the park with her emotional scenes in both eps. i wish we had seen more of this Celia in S3 instead of wacky grandma 

Liked Officer Penn’s Clint Eastwood impression. And interesting that they used a white male cop as a bad guy. 

Celia’s snow globe was a lovely gift. According to Disney PR, it was inspired by Terri’s snow globe collection and Lilan and Trent didn’t know what was inside the box until they opened it. 

Liked the Game of Thrones reference (at least the Andi Mack finale can’t be worse than that show’s) 

Loved the music in the cold open, it was the same they used for scene transitions in 3x07. 

I try not to pass judgment on the show because the whole Ham situation is so awful and unprecedented but that convo about him going to India really skated close to dark humour especially when Celia said ‘’don’t worry you’ll see him again’’.

Negatives: 

Notice how they kept Kira making TJ feel bad about his crush out of the previously on and instead focused on her disliking Cyrus because he’s Buffy’s friend. I do think Kira gets called out for that by TJ during the finale but it’s clear for now that they’re trying to pass this off as her hating Buffy and liking TJ and wanting him for herself. 

They had Luke and Raquel for a day but filmed quite a bit less than their typical maximum. TJ himself only got 2:45 minutes of screentime, including being in the background, which is a little less than his usual 3 minutes. 

Which isn’t a surprise, TJ’s screen time operates by a different math than other recurring characters. It’s the same pattern in both S2 and S3, he can be in 9 aired eps max and only 3 eps after the 13th ep of the season. Luckily in S3 Disney only ordered 21 eps so instead of only 3 TJ eps spread out over 12 eps we got 3 spread out over 8 until the FBI knocked that down to 7. 

It’s not a question of budget, they had a much higher per ep budget in S3, nor was it scheduling since Luke had no other projects and they were able to work around Garren’s GH filming schedule right through the finale and re-shoots nor was there a 9 ep limit on recurring characters as Emily was in 11 of the original 21 this season. 

Not to mention they’ve been drastically cutting TJ’s screentime with Cyrus. Luckily they do probably have to give him a bit more than 3 minutes in Something to Talk A-Boot and hopefully gets more than 3 in the finale. 

The Cyrus and Jonah plot was sweet but pure filler. I never expected Cyrus to talk to Jonah about his feelings or anything related to his sexuality but was there nothing else they could even briefly touch on? Jonah’s anxiety? Cyrus’ anxiety? Jonah’s family problems? It’s not like Terri didn’t know the show was going to end just 7 eps later in otl so why waste this time? It’s most likely the last significant solo time those two have and they should have used it more wisely.

Vivian turned out to be completely useless. Seems like they cut some of her lines but I really don’t get her purpose. 

The clothing protest was rushed and the ending was very unsatisfying. It hurt the plot that we never actually saw anyone connected to the company.

Celia and Bex didn’t really patch up either and I’m guessing things weren’t truly fixed until Bex agreed to put the wedding back on in 3x17 in otl. 

Amber is in love with Jonah? This is what they’re dedicating so much screen time to in these final eps? 

They really ruined the swings for nothing. At least we get nice scenes in Something to Talk A-Boot and the finale

Kira really is something. She’s trying to get a a guy she knows is gay to date her which is insane

I was expecting there to be very little in this final TJ ep before the original wedding in part because of Terri’s instagram post back in November right after Josh revealed the endgame had changed and right before they shot the original 3x18 where she screenshotted a tweet that said Andi Mack fans should stop accusing the show of queer baiting or blaming Disney censorship in regards to Cyrus’ story line. Writers let their work speak for them and that Terri posted that was a sign that the criticism hit to close to home. 

The show is not queer baiting and 3x11 was an all time great but to pretend there hasn’t been long running censorship from Disney is a straight up lie and excluding 3x11 there’s really been very little. I’m sure she had planned for the bench scene for a while but she couldn’t have known that she’d get it approved until it was time to write the finale. Disney seemed committed to some sort of Tyrus endgame but it very easily could have been just them standing together smiling at the end in which case this whole mess of a plot would have been for nothing. She was reckless but got very lucky that Disney didn’t screw her over. I hope whoever ends up making the next Disney show with a gay story line will know not to bite off more than they can chew. 

Looking Ahead:

Things are in some ways simpler and in some ways messier for Tyrus. TJ seems to have accepted Kira as a friend but is refusing to use her as a beard and still wants to hang with Cyrus. Cyrus thinks TJ is straight but has seemingly forgiven him for costume day so that conflict is swept under the rug. Either Kira does a complete 180 off screen and apologizes in her 45 seconds of speaking time in the finale or she’s just there so Cyrus can be sad and TJ tells her off and then goes to speak to Cyrus without her getting any real development or redemption. Either way it’s going to be wild going from closeted TJ to TJ having a boyfriend and being out to at least several people all in like 3-4 minutes of screentime.  

She really is only looking at something like 30-45 seconds of speaking time in the finale and not all that much more of background time if she’s lucky as Raquel was only on set for one day and it was the same day all the other main and recurring kids were also filming and she was only 14 at the time which means she can be on set a little less than most of the other kids. And her insta story shows that it was just her and Luke in the school room and after she finished class she was just hanging on set until they wrapped for the day. 

If she’s not getting a redemption arc than most likely they’ll follow up with what Buffy said and she’ll say something mean about Cyrus that will cause TJ to drop his willful blindness and tell her off or she gets tired of waiting and tries to demand that TJ dates her and he tells her off. Either way Cyrus would likely see them and mistake it for them having a moment. 

 This does mean that TJ doesn’t need to redeem himself so much in Something to Talk A-Boot at the theatre or the game. That TJ is even at those events and hanging with Cyrus over at least two days in universe means he’s either not hanging with Kira or he still is but is less vulnerable to her manipulation.

So the prop garbage was for community service after all. Wild

They really went there with the stereotypes about Asian people. I think great things can come of this plot and I’m excited to see Andi’s art plot line take off. 

Now we know why Jonah says ‘’why can’t it just be fun? Why does it have to be love?’’ There’s almost no chance this Amber in love with Jonah story won’t be a trainwreck but hopefully it’s an entertaining one. I really don’t know if there’s anything they can do for Amber’s home life. Her parents divorcing would probably help in the long term but it would be a very depressing ending to her arc. 

Really does seem to be no set up for Jandi but we’ll see how long they can keep their lead girl completely romance free. Lilan and Asher have both talked about Jonah and Andi being settled and Disney has been hyping up Jandi moments and of course Jonah sings You Girl so something is going to happen. With the new promos suggesting Andi might be moving away in the finale, probably for her art, I wonder if they have an ending where they’re not officially together but they know they like each other and that the universe will always guide them back to one another or some hippy crap like that. 

Presumably Bowie still wants to get married. Wonder how they’ll get the wedding back on track without Ham’s help. 

Mack chat kids hate Kira but no mention of Tyrus which is no surprise. On the plus side this means we get Luke guest starring for either Something to Talk A-Boot or the finale and it seems that Josh was a finale guest so they will have to talk about Tyrus even if only briefly. 

I’ll talk more about the new promos tomorrow but I’m so glad that they’re teasing the bench scene.

Only 5 more weeks left!

[rachello344]

A glossary of fandom terms that have either been taken from literary criticism (incorrectly) or that I use that are either no longer in use or have... different definitions now.

If anyone has any terms they’d like to see added or words you come across that have confused you, please drop me a line.  I’d be happy to add to this whenever.  It’ll all be under a readmore so that I can edit it when needed.  ^^

Discourse--Literally a discussion, like, the act of discussing.  That’s it.  More specifically, people will say, “the novel here participates in one of the many discourses on gender” or something like that.  Essentially linking one occurrence to a wider conversation.  Literature and Media do not exist in a vacuum, but neither can one work make a trend, but I’ll get to that. Just call it wank or meta.  Use the words we have, don’t take words from academia, especially when you don’t understand their context.

Romance--One of many genres of fiction.  This is a story that centers around a romantic relationship between two or more characters.  I could tell you about how all genres are crutches and constructs we assign to make ourselves feel better, but that might be moving too fast.  For now, what’s important is what a romance isn’t.  A romance is NOT some kind of idealist model that must serve as a positive example for the Youth.  That would be Utopian Romance fiction (which is boring because stories need conflict, but that’s my own opinion on the matter).  A romance only needs the major plot conflicts to hinge around the romantic (as in not platonic, this could be love or lust or some combination thereof) relationships between its characters.  Pride and Prejudice is a romance.  Captive Prince is a romance.  The Foxhole Court, while containing a romantic subplot, is not a romance.  Harry Potter is not a romance.  A story can have romance without being a romance.  Compare romantic comedies with action movies, as an example.  But, don’t think that a romance can’t be tense or unhealthy or whatever.  Fifty Shades is also a romance, remember.  If you wrote out the Joker and Harley Quinn’s story, only focusing on them, their story would be a romance.  It’s more complicated than that, obviously, and there’s nuance, but I think you get the picture.  Regardless of your moral views on the love depicted, a romance is nothing more or less than a story about the development of a romantic relationship.

Fetishization--I hate seeing this word thrown around.  This literally means that something has been made into a fetish object on a cultural level.  You can have the fetishization of purity in American culture, for example.  And you can have the fetishization of homosexual relationships in pornography intended for heterosexual audiences.  However.  A single work of fiction is not fetishizing anything.  It may contribute to an overall trend, but this is not a word to use for single entities.  This is a cultural trend word.  Sure, it can be used for subcultures, but whenever I see this word used, it’s used to mean that some work of fiction or other is bad for displaying a queer sexual relationship in any kind of (perceived) perverse way.  Please stop using this word incorrectly.  As a kind of burgeoning critical theorist (i.e. English grad student), it is incredibly frustrating.  You’re using words you don’t understand in ways that undermine the hard work being done by people in my field.  Unless you’re going to read Marx and Lukacs and learn what the word “reification” means, I think you should use another word. In most cases, what is meant is that some group people don’t like are showing an interest in something perceived as not belonging to them, whether that’s true or not.  I think if we unpack that a little, we can all find better ways to phrase things.  Fetishization is an accusation thrown around, not the analysis it’s meant to be.  And, frankly, it needs to stop.

Normalization--This is thrown around so often I hardly know where to begin.  This is not a word that can be used for a single object, again.  This is a word meant for trends.  For example, we could talk about the fact that male violence in our culture is normalized and so no longer taken as seriously as it should be.  A fictional work depicting something you don’t like in a way you perceive as positive and uncritical does not mean that it’s normalizing it.  A single crime procedural does not normalize crime.  You could say that the trend of always showing cops to be in the right, no matter the extreme actions they take, normalizes the liberties they take in the real world, making it difficult to speak out against police brutality and other such abuses.  But again, that’s the genre as a whole--procedural cop dramas could all contribute, but one of them is not going to be normalizing on its own.  That isn’t how that works. Just say that you find whatever it is unpleasant to read because of X or Y trope.  Or talk about how the TROPE is normalizing something.  That’s totally legitimate.  The trope of X normalizes Y behavior in Z culture/situation/etc. and this is harmful because W.

Romanticization--This does not mean that something bad is shown in a romantic light.  This is another big trend word.  Cultural myths about heterosexual marriage and related gender roles contribute to the romanticization of domestic abuse.  A single work of fiction depicting an abusive relationship in any kind of perceive positive light is not romanticizing abuse.  Cultural narratives about women needing to be convinced can romanticize the act of rape, especially from the male perspective.  One work of fiction cannot do this.  It has to be on at least a genre level, if not cultural or societal.  Again, subcultural too, but you have to make the argument apply outward. The BL/Yaoi trope of having a Seme character force an openly reluctant Uke character into sex romanticizes sexual assault.  One BL using the trope can contribute to it, but it isn’t romanticizing anything on its own.  It’s not powerful enough to be capable of that.

Wank--The word once used to describe what is now called “discourse.”  It’s usually a circle jerk of complaints about some fandom or another or the people in it.  Every example of so called discourse I have ever seen was actually just wank wearing a new hat.  Don’t put on airs or borrow credibility.  Call a spade a spade.

Meta--Analysis on a series or character.  Some of these are better reasoned than others, but the only way to truly rate them is in how well they use their evidence (and how much evidence they have) to support whatever claim they make.  These are often essays, but can be a couple paragraphs, sometimes with pictures as evidence along with quotes from the source.  Some “discourse” falls into this, but only very rarely.  Most people call meta either meta or analysis instead.

BNF--Big Name Fan.  This is THE person in your fandom, generally an artist, occasionally a fic writer or other content creator.  You’ll know them when you see them.  This is the person everyone follows.  Their headcanons are so widely accepted that they almost always become fanon (whether you like it or not).  Some of these people are super nice and use their powers for good.  Others can become divas, mad with the power the fandom has given them.  Regardless, there is almost always drama brewing around them (whether they like it or not, unfortunately). I recently saw some commenting on people actually asking other fans for permission to hold certain headcanons.  Someone with that power is a BNF.  That is a TRADEMARK of a BNF.  Their fandom credibility and respect is so high that people see them as some kind of authority figure.  Be wary of people who go along with this.  They’re not to be trifled with, and frankly, it’s safer not to engage.

TPTB--The Powers That Be, otherwise known as the writers/producers/creators of any given series.  These are the people that create Canon and produce Word of God.

Canon--Anything that explicitly happened in the confines of a series.  Basically, the events of any given series in whatever form the standard is.  I.E. episodes of a TV show, books in a book series, etc.

Fringe Canon--Works that are connected to the series in question, but not part of the standard form.  Often includes movies, novelizations, guide books, etc.  Can be considered canon, but isn’t something every fan will see/have access to, so can’t really be considered The Canon.  Can also includes things that are implicit in the text, so something that can be argued in meta but that not everyone will agree on.

Word of God--Something said by TPTB that remains outside of canon.  I.E. interviews, panels, and other things said at conventions or for PR.  Common mantra, “PR is not showrunning” meaning that Word of God often has little to do with what happens within the series. Example:  Some sub-textual evidence of Dumbledore being gay does not make his being gay canon (it makes it fringe canon, imo).  Rowling saying that he was gay in an interview is here considered Word of God.  You can take it or leave it, because no one in the series says the words “Dumbledore was gay” or any other variation that would make it explicit canon.

Headcanon--Something that you decide about a character.  This isn’t canon and often has no strong basis in canon.  It can include sexuality, gender, religion, favorite color, anything not covered by canon.  You can also have headcanons that contradict canon.

Fanon--Headcanons that have become Too Powerful.  These are things, good or bad, that have been accepted by a probably absurd number of people.  Some of these can be great, especially when the series has some seriously bad writing, but if you find yourself disagreeing, this can be the worst thing you ever have to deal with.  Especially when people who subscribe to it insist on its being canon...

Ship--Any feasible romantic relationship, canon or non-canon.  There are of course platonic variants, but those are usually specified (broship, brotp, etc.).  Most often two people, but more recently polyshipping has come into vogue. To Ship (v.)--For me, this does not apply to canon ships no matter if I like them or not.  Shipping is transformative.  To me, more than anything, shipping (as a verb) means you consume or create transformative media centered around that relationship (most often non-canon or not explicit canon, but could include canon, it just needs to be an active not passive interest in the relationship).

Canon Ship--The series endgame, usually (but not always!) straight.  This is an explicit couple.  They are in a relationship.  They kiss (or something) on screen.  You can still take it or leave it, but that doesn’t stop it from being canon.

Rare Pair--This is a ship that has some basis in canon, but is extremely unpopular.  Some people include anything with less than a certain number of fic on Ao3, but it varies by fandom.  I’ve been into rare pairs with less than 10 fic written for them, so anything around 500 still seems like quite a bit in comparison.  Your Mileage May Vary (YMMV), but you’ll know it when you see it.

Crack Ship--These people have probably never spoken.  There is no reason for them to be in a relationship other than the fan’s preference (often aesthetic or story-related).  A crack ship is often random and completely baseless.  A crack ship is not simply a ship that won’t be canon.  Most ships will never be canon.  This goes beyond that into the ridiculous.  As a recent example, Keith x Zarkon would be a crack ship, while Keith x Hunk is perfectly reasonable (if rare).

Multi-shipping--Shipping characters together without a strong preference for one combination over another.  For example, shipping your fave with every possible romantic partner, not just one (or more in a polyship).  This includes Everyone x Character type things, not just “I could ship them with literally anyone.”  Both count.

OTP--One True Pairing.  The ship you love above all others, canon or not.  For me, I have exactly one of these per fandom, but I know other people use it differently now.  This used to mean that you ship the thing exclusively.  You might like art for other ships with the characters in this OTP, but you’re not that into it.  This used to be THE ship.  The characters in this OTP were not shipped with others, and other relationships were used for jealousy or plot reasons, not usually because you enjoy the other ships.  This is the ship you go to war about.

OT#--Same as above, but there are more than two people involved.  So, the one polyship you hold above all other ships (poly or not).

BrOTP--Platonic version of the above.  These are the ride or die friendships of the series.  You don’t see them as in love, but they absolutely love each other.  There’s devotion and loyalty and affection--or you just think their friendship is the best/greatest/funniest and you don’t see them ever ending up together romantically.  You want these characters to be BFFs, not lovers.

[maplestreetsims]

get to know me tag!

so, i came to catfish you all with my updated simself, also i made her with alpha cc bc why not?

I saw @galaxsims did this and i thought it might be fun, so the point of this is to make a simself and answer some q’s so people get to know you better

I’m going to tag anyone who wants to do this, Just go crazy 

   - trash under cut -

1. What is your full name? Constanza

2. What is your nickname? most people call me coti, i had a few friends that called me constance tho

3. Birthday? July 1, 2000

4. What is your favorite book series? i dont read as much as i used to so i dont have one

5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? aliens yes, ghosts...maybe? just for the spookines of it all tbh

6. Who is your favorite author? i dont read dont come for me

7. What is your favorite radio station? i never listen to the radio, mostly spotify

8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? anything cheese flavored, or like pizza? idk im thinkin chips here

9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? amazing, cool!

10. What is your current favorite song? literally queens entire discography??? like i saw bohemian rhapsody last week, i liked queen before but now im like on hyperdrive or something

11. What is your favorite word?  chaos

12. What was the last song you listened to? Somebody to love, by (you guessed it) queen

13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? hmm... i dont know, skam, maybe freaks and geeks

14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? pride (2014) always makes me feel happy when i watch it, i really like it

15. Do you play video games? yes

16. What is your biggest fear? Ending up alone, but not romantically, more of like no friends, or family

17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? i dont know... i just try to be a good person?? like i put myself in others peoples shoes and treat them how i would like to be treated i guess, bc i know how its like being treated like shit and i wouldnt want that for anyone lol

18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? my socializing skills? or lack thereof 

19. Do you like cats or dogs better? i like them both the same

20. What is your favorite season? i dont like any season sjdjsdk

21. Are you in a relationship? nope

22. What is something you miss from your childhood? just.. happiness?? not only my own but like everyone in my family (yikes) also my innocence 

23. Who is your best friend? haha ha

24. What is your eye color? brown

25. What is your hair color? Dark brown 

26. Who is someone you love? no one honestly, maybe my pets?

27. Who is someone you trust? literally anyone who is nice to me, that’s bad

28. Who is someone you think about often? my friends, classmates

29. Are you currently excited about/for something? nothing currently

30. What is your biggest obsession? The sims, life is strange and detroit become human.....also queen?, weird combinations

31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? Art attack! also the cocodrile hunter??? that was my shit!!

32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? I know i just said i trust everyone but like....i dont open up, like ever

33. Are you superstitious? No

34. Do you have any unusual phobias? Elevators?? and cars...are those phobias?

35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Behind

36. What is your favorite hobby? Editing, playin sims... u know

37. What was the last book you read? I cant remember fghjkljhg probably something for school

38. What was the last movie you watched? Bohemian rhapsody rip

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? i wish i could play any musical instrument, but i suck tbh

40. What is your favorite animal? cats and dogs™

41. What are your top 5 7 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow?

@pollinationqueen�� @cosmic-espie​ @omiscanking @bloomlet @gunthermunch @cowberrys and @mellocakes ♥♥

42. What superpower do you wish you had? telekinesis??? um hell yeah why would anyone want anything else

43. When and where do you feel most at peace? this is weird but when im riding the bus home, listening to music

44. What makes you smile? my simblr, youtube videos...

45. What sports do you play, if any? i wish

46. What is your favorite drink? coca cola beech! 

47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? I dont even remember, but i had to write something like that around this year at least

48. Are you afraid of heights? yes

49. What is your biggest pet peeve? it used to be hearing people chew, but i think im over it

50. Have you ever been to a concert? no, never

51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? No

52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? a vet

53. What fictional world would you like to live in? idk sis

54. What is something you worry about? my future, and my life

55. Are you scared of the dark? sometimes

56. Do you like to sing? yes, only when im alone

57. Have you ever skipped school? yeah, but i tried not to, it felt like i was missing out and that kinda made me feel like shit??

58. What is your favorite place on the planet? i dont think i have one, but more like a bunch of them? and only at specific times if that make sense, like the outside of that theater at nightime when i went to see a play with my friends a while ago

59. Where would you like to live? mmm maybe the usa? or anywhere where i could get to speak english all the time

60. Do you have any pets? a cat and a dog, Mercury and Candy!

61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? Night owl, def

62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? Sunsets, im never up for sunrises anyways, unless i stayed up all night

63. Do you know how to drive? no but i hope that i do at some point, although im scared of cars

64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? headphones

65. Have you ever had braces? nope, my teeth are as straight as me

66. What is your favorite genre of music? rock, indie...maybe pop rock?

67. Who is your hero? i dont have one

68. Do you read comic books? not really

69. What makes you the most angry? myself sometimes

70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? Real book all the way, when i do read that is

71. What was your favorite subject in school? cinematography class???? idk how it translates properly but that was my fave, although the teacher fucking ruined it for all of us tbh

72. Do you have any siblings? nope

73. What was the last thing you bought? a bus ticket

74. How tall are you? 4′9...yikes

75. Can you cook? not at all

76. What are three things that you love? this blog, my family and my pets

77. What are three things that you hate? hooo boy

78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? i have 0 friends what does that mean? jk i actually would say its pretty equal 

79. What is your sexual orientation? yes

80. Where do you currently live? Uruguay, montevideo

81. Who was the last person you texted? my dad

82. When was the last time you cried? last week

83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? jenna and julien, and probably every sims youtuber(seriously)

84. Do you like to take selfies? not so much

85. What is your favorite app? tumblr, or youtube

86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? its alright

87. What is your favorite foreign accent? portugeese

88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? mmm all of them

89. What is your favorite number? 7

90. Can you juggle? Nop

91. Are you religious? no

92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? The ocean

93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? hahah no

94. Are you allergic to anything? i used to be allergic to a bunch of shit when i was a kid but im not allergic to it anymore?? like chocolate, oranges....cats, and dust

95. Can you curl your tongue? Yes

96. Can you wiggle your ears? Yes

97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? always hopefully

98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? Forest

99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? i dont really ask for advice that often so...idk

100. Are you a good liar? No, but i try

101. What is your Hogwarts House? Hufflepuff

102. Do you talk to yourself? i used to talk to myself all the time, but now i barely do it, thats a good thing right?

103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Introvert

104. Do you keep a journal/diary? no, i used to when i was a kid but it was pure garbage

105. Do you believe in second chances? Depends

106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? look for an id to see if i cant turn it in, if not....well

107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? Yes, but only in certain things

108. Are you ticklish? i dont even know, probably not

109. Have you ever been on a plane? no

110. Do you have any piercings? yeah, my ears

111. What fictional character do you wish was real? idk

112. Do you have any tattoos? No, but hopefully i will some day!

113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? i dont know....

114. Do you believe in karma? yeah

115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? no

116. Do you want children? yeah why not

117. Who is the smartest person you know? honestly i don’t know

118. What is your most embarrassing memory? doing a cindirella theatre play for my school when i was 12, i was cindirella, i dont wanna talk about it njxkcfxf

119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? not that i remember, i always end up falling asleep, dosent matter if its like 10 minutes 

120. What color are most of you clothes? green.........i dont even like green

121. Do you like adventures? yeah maybe, depends on what it is

122. Have you ever been on TV? yeah i have actually lmao, it was on a kids tv show 

123. How old are you? 18

124. What is your favorite quote? “We don’t make mistakes, just happy little accidents” 

125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? savory!!

[hisband]

I’ve stayed quiet about this for too long now, and today I finally reached my limit.

If you interact with ifhollicould / heedingcalls / Summer, block me. I don’t want to see her, ever. She was, unfortunately, somebody I spent a year and a half of my time with (from spring 2016 to winter 2017, to be exact). During much of that time I knew something was wrong with our relationship, but kept convincing myself otherwise. I kept convincing myself that maybe I was overreacting to things - that maybe I was being unfair and selfish, for having needs that didn’t coincide with hers, or cater to hers - but that wasn’t the case at all. And if I knew then what I know now, I would’ve taken more screencaps to help document what I’m about to describe. I never would have gotten involved with her in the first place.

Trigger warning for misogyny, homophobia, lesbophobia & transphobia.

Shit Summer pulled during the time that I knew her includes:

Sending a friend of mine - a friend who happens to be a gay man, someone with no interest in women whatsoever - an unsolicited picture of her half-naked body in November of 2017. 

Sending me text messages every day for a whole month (December 2017) after I asked her for some space after a family member died, clearly desperate for a response even though I’d already given her a valid reason as to why I wasn’t talking.

Sending me passive-aggressive texts whenever she saw me posting on the dash but not speaking to her, during the time period mentioned above.

Chasing me down after cutting ties with her last year, getting on anon and guilt-tripping me about the fact I left. Here’s the evidence.

Treating female characters like toys or sex objects (seriously, look at her blogs where she writes women - really look at the way she portrays them in her writing, how she goes out of her way to describe how ~dainty and delicate~ they are), or projecting herself onto her own female characters in order to act out the lustful feelings she has towards others’ muses, particularly of the male variety. I can’t tell you how many times she did that to me, which is a big part of the reason why I left a lot of my blogs from 2016 and 2017. Too many bad memories that literally ruined old muses of mine for me (or at least, writing them on this platform).

Ignoring my own female characters, because paying attention to them meant she had to take a break from wanking to the male characters (and our very few m/m ships!) for five minutes.

Having a very superficial interest in female characters and f/f ships. Happily gushing about het ships and fetishizing m/m ships, but losing interest in the subject the minute that lesbian couples entered the equation.

The very few times we did discuss f/f stuff, she described the characters involved as “sapphic babies”, effectively infantilizing them. (She also was uninterested in giving them complex storylines, on that note. Interesting.) M/M ships were “gay babies”, which is just as infantilizing and gross. 

According to her logic, women are “the fairer sex” - a term that sure crops up a lot on her blogs! Okay, so…you’re implying that all women have vaginas, Summer? That having a vagina is inherently tied to being a woman? Sex and gender are not interchangeable terms.

The term “fairer sex” is also nasty because it inherently assumes that all women are these weak, feminized creatures, separate from men, less strong and less capable and less rugged and always “fairer” than them. Really interesting statement from somebody who preaches about what a feminist she is.

Which I guess would explain why she took such an issue with my character Ginger, whose behaviour did not line up with Summer’s views on what is traditionally feminine (she even called Ginger “butch” at one point, despite having no idea what that word actually means), but I digress. She’d also frequently reduce Ginger to her sexual orientation. At the time, I wrote Ginger as bisexual, so I guess Summer saw Ginger as “the aggressive girl who fucks other girls”.

As for the more personal shit involving why I cut ties with her!

A lot of it involved her possessive and territorial behaviour towards me, particularly towards the end of our friendship (which is exactly why I left). This started around the time I made Murdoc’s blog, became really active on him, began branching out and befriending other roleplayers, or reconnecting with friends I’d lost touch with. Prior to this incident, Summer and I spoke to each other on a daily basis; it was only towards the end that I began to feel very smothered by her presence. I felt as if I couldn’t go a moment without Summer wanting to know where I was and what I was doing. Summer constantly reminded me that she loved me and valued me as a friend - which I now recognize as a manipulation tactic to keep me by her side, and to make me feel guilty for having other relationships outside of her.

Which is really funny, because I tried on many occasions to get her involved with other peers of mine during the time that I knew her (so she wouldn’t feel left out), only for Summer to constantly decline, claiming those peers of mine were “better” than her and that she “wasn’t good enough to talk to them”. At the time, I thought that maybe it was her social anxiety. Now, looking back, it reads as yet another tactic of manipulation - a way of keeping me around her.

Summer would also frequently take her bad moods out on me, becoming hysterical over text messages and refusing to listen to reason and refusing to find constructive ways to work through her problems. I would frequently try to assure her that everything was going to be okay, only for Summer to brush me off. Those conversations usually went something like this:

Summer: This is making me upset. Me: Have you thought about doing A, B, or C? Summer: I’m going to go mope now.

It didn’t make me feel very good, and often made me feel like I was failing her as a friend. By the end of those conversations, I’d usually feel as drained, and my mood would be as miserable as hers was.

I often felt as if Summer domineered our conversations and the things we wrote about together. In all fairness, I have a very passive personality, and have a tendency to let others lead conversations. I don’t usually give input unless explicitly asked, or if I’m absolutely certain that my input won’t be ignored. I also have a history with allowing people to take their anger and grief out on me. This is something I’ve been actively been trying to work on. I do not want to put all the blame on Summer for all of that, but a large part of me still feels as if the very nature of my personality was preyed upon, and that Summer was manipulating me into doing what she wanted - both in and out of character.

Again, I wish I had more of the aforementioned evidence with me on hand, but I promise you. Go through Summer’s blogs and take a look for yourself. She hasn’t changed. A lot of what I’ve mentioned is still going on, and will continue to go on if someone doesn’t speak up against her.

This post is not an invitation to send hate to Summer, but to inform people of her past and ongoing behaviour so those who may be potentially affected can do what they need to in order to avoid her (blacklisting, unfollowing, blocking, etc). Ignore or disagree with me if you want - I’m merely giving my side of the story and sharing my experiences involving her, and trying to protect those who are at risk of being hurt.

[naernon]

for the ask meme (TES, obvs): 3,9, 13 (for naemon), 23!

thank you!! i wrote this all last night and i havent checked for coherency or errors so forgive me if it’s a bit scatterbrained at times (although yall should be used to incoherency coming from me ghhgfg.)

____

3.) Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?

someone said that they didn’t like serana and i was already sitting on the decision to unfollow them for other reasons and that. that was just the Final Straw.

but i think that’s it…? im so petty + impulsive (deadly combo) at times that maybe i did unfollow over a TES opinion another time but i can’t remember hgufuhfhxdfh

____

9.) Most disliked character(s)? Why?

OOF this is a hard one, ill list the ones that come to mind rn;

molag bal. needs no explanation

darren guitar or whatever his name is. im sorry to anyone who likes him but i just.. can’t. he’s so obnoxious. he was toned down in summerset, probably because different people were writing him if i had to guess but in the main and daggerfall covenant questline? awful. his goddamn womanizing jokes at every second of the day was “kim, there’s people that are dying” at its finest.literally one or two “haha ladies amirite fellow man ;)/haha ladies amirite……… lady ;)” jokes can be.. bearable albeit still annoying but there was so much more than that. or they were so obnoxiously written that it seemed to be more frequent than in actuality, either way, darren guitar? 0/10also my view of him hasnt gotten better since someone sent me a rude ask about how darren had more personality than prince naemon in-game due to me joking about how i don’t like him and then subsequently blocked me for being irritated about the rudeness of the ask + the fact that im 99% sure they were the anon that appeared in my fucking inbox defending darren guitar every single time i breathed a single word about him

i completely forgot he existed until you listed him as disliked and now i hate him even more. that fucking. bard from the bannered mare. the one that harassed carlotta until you told him to fuck off. i hate that dude. always have

abnur tharn. mildly obnoxious with some amusing lines until you find out what he did to queen ayrenn like. small dick mannimarco joke is now renounced, little man. Perish.my view on Estre is Complicated because she’s a really neat character and villain and ranks as a favorite in the latter department but from like, a moral standpoint i loathe her.also while it wasn’t like. pelidil levels of shittiness i’m not fond of how she hurt naemon– but then again……. now that i think of it, i really don’t know what’d she COULD do other than keep him in the absolute dark until he inevitably gets caught up in the Shitshow otherwise. i wouldn’t suppose naemon to be 100% willing to join in her efforts or even keep completely quiet about them if she did decide to talk to him about it or let him know; and for all we know, she could’ve planned to do so eventually in some way– but the suddenness of the AD hero’s infiltration of the veiled heritance probably ruined any semblance of a plan she could’ve had. so on second thought, even from a “naemon is a perfect being and i will protect him with my life and loathe all who hurt him” standpoint, i don’t dislike her too much. let’s just reduce estre to like.. honorable mentions on my “disliked characters” list then lmao(also “moral standpoint” as if queen ayrenn is anything close to the pinnacle of absolute morality. estre is objectively worse on that front, though, so i suppose i still stand by that)

speaking of which i really… don’t like pelidil. again, moral standpoint. and “naemon is a perfect being and i will protect him with my life and loathe all who hurt him” standpoint. otherwise, he’s a neat villain and the quest in which you cut him down was one of the more impressive quests in the game IMO, or even in the entire game series. good build-up.

this is getting too long so i’ll cut it there, that’s all the characters that come to mind rn anyways hfhgdhg

____

10.) Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

hmmmmmm

i guess if you view it in such a way, liking him is kind of unpopular– while there’s still a lot of those who even if not actively talking about him as a character, have praised his character/took his side/whatever, there’s also a good amount who don’t. not really in considering him a poorly written character, but rather from a (sorry to bring this phrase up so much so far) moral standpoint.

also, considering him in a semi-unironic “he did nothing wrong” way, which i do, is kind of unpopular– and i can understand that, in some ways. i dont think him snapping at the scene of the orrery was under his 100% control nor was anything subsequent, but there’s still the fact that he still is in an “i deserve the throne, fuck off” mindset in coldharbour, which, unless he’s STILL affected by the mantle and/or the orrery, is obviously a negative change in viewpoint compared to the “i’ll swallow my bitterness and remain loyal to my sister and the dominion, she is the rightful queen and i am just her shadow” you saw prior.

granted, i’d argue that even then, you have to consider the influence that pelidil had over him prior (as some have accurately put it before– whispered poison into his ear). especially with the fact that naemon’s quite young for an elf at… 26? around that age-range. i dont think altmer’s minds work in the way that, say, hobbits do, in that they age slower and this includes their mental capability, decision-making, etc.. (they obviously don’t) BUT, compared to an elf with more experience, there’s a bit of an… imbalance there. pelidil WAS the one who served naemon instead of the other way around so you’d figure the opposite if anything, but again, naemon = impressionable and emotionally vulnerable at the time.

anyways, got off-topic; my point was that naemon, when you consider the influence that pelidil and any other secretly heritance people that interacted with him, even when you use the fact that he still seems “corrupted” in coldharbour to frame him as bad… that ain’t it. there’s also the fact that he is being tortured, at that moment. big part of it. he PROBABLY isn’t in the right state of mind, to put it simply. but then again, i mean, one could still argue a whole “cool motive, still murder” take on it, so whatever. i dont know man ghfghduhbdfg

YIKES i rambled, holy shit. sorry. but otherwise, i dont think i have too many? there’s not much in the prince naemon…. sub-fandom, at least not enough to be able to render one opinion as unpopular compared to the next

(and i. Guess that headcanoning him as trans definitely has the potential to be unpopular. but i dont really talk about it or “enforce” it much other than off-hand comments that might imply such, drawing him with top surgery scars, etc.. so it hasn’t exactly been given any room to be considered remotely unpopular. haven’t gotten anon hate, snide comments, etc.. about any of it at all so it’s cool. but i’ve brought it up because… you know how fandoms are; if there was more to the prince naemon “fandom”, theoretically, it would be and therefore kind of IS an unpopular opinion. “does your arm hurt from reaching cassius” ok look, i just felt like i needed to provide one more unpopular opinion about naemon and i couldn’t figure out any other than that. but yes. yes, hurts a little)

____

23.) Unpopular character you love?

unpopular as in commonly disliked, or unpopular in… amount of people that like them? with the latter, it’s def naemon. i love him with all my heart gfigufhgdugdfh but then again who didn’t know that

with the former… hm. the thing is a lot of characters disliked in this fandom are disliked with good reason IMO– nevermind. almalexia. not to open any #diskhorse wounds but almalexia’s one of them ghdfhguhg jot that down

and i’ve heard some talk that veya is kind of unpopular, what with the recent summerset developments? yeah, fuck that, veya’s one of my favorites. this fandom (or. any fandom lets be real) has an awful tendency to praise any goddamn male character’s flaws or “negative” depth as redeemable character complexity and something that can be looked past, and yet, you see even REMOTELY the same amount if not more character depth in a female character and they’re hated. pointing this out is nothing new but it’s truly just…. something to behold.

and on that note im just going to renounce my prior statement of “a lot of characters disliked in this fandom are disliked with good reason” that’s the dumbest shit i’ve ever said. or perhaps an addendum stating that it’s only applicable to male characters is more in order? or that it’s the opposite for male characters: liked with bad reason. or… liked with over-exaggerated reason disproportionate to the actual amount of depth, complexity, and/or likeability said character actually has, paired with hatred for female characters with the same amount of complexity. “bruh don’t you obsess over prince naemon–” Yeah And What the Fuck Of It

anyways moving on sorry i got distracted hgdfgyfgh. that’s all the characters that come to mind? disregarding characters that are unpopular in an unappreciated sort of way rather than a disliked way, i really dont have a lot

____ 

salty fandom (elder scrolls) opinions

[screamingintp]

more about my mc

this is a mess, please don’t read it unless you’re interested in what i come up with when i’m sleep deprived and creating my first rp character

https://character-resource.deviantart.com/art/Big-Ass-Character-Sheet-Updating-167182524 but i cut out a buncha shit

welcome to hell(or the place in which I can’t capitalize for shit and curse too much and am vague but that’s honestly my personality in general)

Full Name: Mark Knox

Meaning: Mark, derived from Martkos(Roman), related to the war god, Mars. Knox, derived from cnoc(Scottish), meaning hillock.

Origin: made it up on the spot because planning is for cowards

Signature: illegible letters - MKX

Gender: male

Orientation: pan(i wrote pam and don’t regret it)-aro

Blood: three-quarters pure, half blood father

Birthday: 6-6

Deathday: (May not have one yet)(oh gee, did you not expect me to have a day of death?)(well, i don’t)

Astrological Sign: Gemini(fun fact: Draco’s the only Gemini on the wiki)(why is this relevant)(astrology is weird as all hell)

____

Immediate Family: Jacob Knox(brother)

Distant Family: Shay Knox(mother), Clark Knox(father)

Parenting: non-existent

Upbringing(morals and ideals): considering he was raised by a person only a few years older than him, during the period of Voldemort’s rule, he is less screwed up than he could’ve been. However, he still possesses a rather vague and undefined sense of right and wrong - using his logic to bypass any sort of regrets if it blocks him from his goal

Infancy: (dropped at birth is an option and i’m living for it)

Childhood: that one kid who lit ants on fire and was ‘rebellious’ (you know that post about america being the asshole kid with neglectful parents? That’s the one)

Adolescence: canon

Adulthood: never. He hasn’t even gotten taller

____

Species: hooman

Preferred Hand: ambidextrous(he keeps injuring his hands)

Facial Type: like a face, why is this - oval, i guess

Eye Color: dark brown

Hair Color (Self Explanatory)(it isn’t when his hair is grey/silver/white)(the kid probably bleached his already pale hair)(he probably likes the smell of bleach)

Hairstyle: fringe-up

Complexion: blushes easily, relatively smooth unless you look at the cuts and bruises and scars on his arms, back and legs

Body Type: ectomorph

Build: skinny arms and legs, he isn’t the most physically fit and regularly damages his body due to his complete lack of care for his own safety

Height: 65 in

Weight: 120 lb

Shoe Size: (Shoe size doesn’t matter)(goddamnit i forgot this was an innuendo)(keep it pg, please)

Birthmarks/scars: no birthmarks, and has tons of ugly marks all over him, none of them particularly remarkable

Distinguishing Features: the contrast between his eye color and hair color - but other than the hair, he doesn’t have a memorable face

_____

Health: as healthy as a wizard without impulse control and emotional support could be

Energy: swings from highs and lows without any pattern

Memory: remembers the small stuff, the negative parts - forgets about major ideas or lessons

Senses: heavily relies on eyes, can’t taste for shit

Allergies: (Self Explanatory. May be optional.)(i mean, i would put animals, but we have transfiguration)

Medication: needs some, doesn’t take any

Phobias(irrational fears):

Symmetrophobia(fear of symmetry, an unnatural-looking but normal occurrence, which isn’t debilitating, but causes him stress and uneasiness)

Siderophobia(fear of the stars, the idea that there’s so much out there that he doesn’t know of is pretty awful and, again, while it isn’t going to freeze him up, it will cause him to become upset)

Addictions: none yet

Mental Disorders: undiagnosed

______

Style: couldn’t care less about appearance  - he wears the school robes most of the time

Mode of Dress: doesn’t have a particular taste, as long as it’s passable, it’s fine - tends to wear a size or two larger

Grooming: somewhere in between messy and neat

Posture: he displays an air of aloofness and confidence - almost condescending in stance

Gait: quickly and efficiently - it’s brisk at his slowest

Coordination: not physically fit at all, he’s too reckless for that - exercises to the point of exhaustion without realizing that it’s detrimental to do so and has limbs flying all over the place

Habits and Mannerisms: taps his foot or fingers when excited, nervous, or anything that deviates from his usual ‘cool’ facade

Scent: earth, smoke, and grass - faint but noticeable

______

Mood: ‘calm’ - probably plotting though

Attitude: he’s charismatic and charming until you dig deeper

Stability: hA

Expressiveness: can act like he’s wearing his heart on his sleeve but can never fully give his true thoughts

When Happy: smirks - invades personal space and slows down

When Depressed: smiles - talks louder and speaks faster

When Angry: (trolls online is an option and if that isn’t Mark, i don’t know what is) smirks - wide eyes and tense hands

______

Friends: Rubeus Hagrid - but not really

Enemies: Rita Skeeter - but not really

Bosses: Filius Flitwick - but not really

Followers: not even himself

Heroes: Filius Flitwick - “short people are closer to hell and he’s gonna whoop my ass if I do anything stupid”

Rivals: Ismelda - “for most edgy teen”

Relates to: Dumbledore - impersonal but seemingly close, full of contradictions and ulterior motives

Pets/Familiars: does his jar of bug bodies count?

______

Wardrobe: mostly consisting of Hogwarts robes, formal robes, and the identical grey-blue sweater and jeans

Equipment: carries a wand and a pencil(but not paper, because he has problems)

Accessories: a single dangling silver piercing on his right ear(family tradition)

Trinkets: carries hair ties on his wrist all the time(why? He doesn’t even know)

Funds: his family is relatively well off, being a respected branch of purebloods

Home: almost like his personality, warm and nice on the outside, cozy on the inside, but dead silent and empty when no one looks - not large but not small either, seeming normal by all accounts if you don’t look into any of the rooms(jacob’s windows are taped shut and Mark broke through the locked door that connected their bedrooms)

Neighborhood: the woods

Transportation: running because stamina apparently is infinite in this world

Collections: bug bodies, herbs, and lighters

Prized Possession: his wand, after seeing Jacob’s broken one

_____

Lovers: yeet

Marital Status: yeet

____

Experience: works in the three broomsticks in his off time to get experience and money, nothing serious

Organizations/Affiliations: changeable, he doesn’t plant many roots or make any long-term promises

______

Education: i mean, Hogwarts. But is it even ‘education’?

School: (What was their school like?) bitch this is Hogwarts

Social Stereotype: “least favorite cursed student”

Intelligence: mostly interpersonal, linguistic and logical

Extracurricular Activities: would do theater if given the chance

_____

Morals: don’t exist - but he honestly has a problem with reasoning his way into committing seriously wrong deeds

Crime Record: hasn’t been caught yet ;)

Motivation: adrenaline, change - nothing truly meaningful or satisfying

Priorities: knowledge, humans, self

Philosophy: gen z nihilism

Etiquette: usually practices ‘correct’ etiquette - does not give a fuck if his behaviour offends someone though

Influences: everything and anything he finds intriguing

Traditions: tries to run away from them, always moving and staying ahead of the past

______

Career: spell-inventor or wand-maker/seller

Desires: uncertain

Accomplishments: undetermined

Biggest Failure: failing Jacob

Secrets: his manipulative side, his genuinely mean streak and the fact that he regrets having those traits

Regrets: a shit ton of things

Worries: Jacob, being nothing in the grand scheme of things, being a hypocrite, betrayal, a shit ton of things

Best Dream: having a greater purpose

Worst Nightmare: dying alone and being left behind as a ghost

Best Memories: finding his brother’s secret room, meeting Billingsley

Worst Memories: losing his brother, lying to his teachers, accidentally calling Chester: Jacob

_______

Hobbies/Interests: explore the wilderness, identify flora and fauna, observing other people

Skills/Talents: pyromancy, charms in general, debating, acting, singing

Likes: mint, sharpies, fire

Dislikes: himself, close-minded people, pity

Sense of Humor: sarcastic, self-deprecating, relatively dark

Pet Peeves: the guy scratching his quill the wrong way in the front row whenever they write essays

Dreams/Nightmares: doesn’t dream usually - when he does, it’s usually flashes of color and abstract black and white shapes

Quirks: can’t sit on the fucking couch correctly

Understands: how people think, the reason they fail, mistakes

Can't understand: quidditch, values, structure

Closet Hobby: burning shit(though that isn’t really a hidden thing with him)

_________

Strengths: charismatic, diplomatic, quick-witted, inwardly caring, able to understand his flaws, patient, logical, able to read other people

Flaws: lies often, manipulative, lazy, lenient, passive, harsh, inconsiderate, enjoys pushing people’s buttons, doesn’t understand people

Perception of others: beautiful, incomprehensible, vast

Instincts: wants approval(deems it irrational)

Lures: leadership roles, secrets, problems

Soft Spot: innocence but not ignorant, optimism

________

Ability: capable if he puts his mind to it - employs unpredictable and risky techniques instead of having a fear of consequences

Weaknesses: stubborn opponents - he expects change and gets caught off guard when someone seems set in their ways

Patronus: non-corporeal

Boggart: fire(irony i guess is easy to use when you don’t have anything else)

Wand: spruce, phoenix feather, 12”, springy

Amortentia: lime, smoke, sharpies

House: Ravenclaw(that post about the kid wanting to be put in Ravenclaw since ppl will trust you but got in Slytherin)

_____

Favorite Color(s): grey, blue

Favorite Animal(s): swedish short snout

Favorite Drink(s): coffee and soda(probably together because he can’t function like a normal person)

Favorite Genre: mystery or myths

Favorite Subject(s): charms(Flitwick is the man) and divination(where you can bs your way through anything)

Least Favorite Color(s): black, white

Least Favorite Animal(s): flies

Least Favorite Drink(s): does soup count? Because he does drink it in a cup

Least Favorite Genre: manuals and biographies

Least Favorite Subject(s): flying(impulsive idiot) and care of magical creatures(he’s a screw up around animals)

________

Languages: english and he taught himself some Latin

Voice: average in tone, a bit nasally, rather forgettable except for the speed

Greetings and Farewells: doesn’t

Ask your character "how are you": yes.

Character tries to compliment: you have eyes, your name is ___

Tries to insult: passive-aggressively drags a person

Expletive: damn(dam)(loopholes, my friends)

Laughter: snorting, definitely not normal

Tagline: ___, yeah?

________

Reputation: other than the whole ‘brother’ problem, is relatively well-liked

First Impressions: charming, confident guy

Stranger Impressions: a bit loud but not strange

Friendly Impressions: goddamnit Mark, shut up

Enemy Impressions: please keep talking so we’re allowed to punch you in the face

Familiar Impressions: ah yes, the hair pops up from time to time

Compliments from others: bright, energetic, optimistic, honest

Insults: dangerous, unstable, chaotic

Self-Impression: am shit

_________

Compare to: forest fire(destructive and necessary for change)

Symbols: flames, ashes, duality

[oadara]

Kinda disappointed to see you like reylo. I love jonerys and don’t see why they would be compared to reylo. Dany and Jon are both heroes. Kylo isn’t worth redeeming. Anakin at least has the tragic backstory as a compelling reason for how he became Vader. Reylo would be abusive, would they ever get together. He said she was nothing but not to him. That’s the most cliché textbook line abusers use. I have a psych degree, so it’s really upsetting to see people ship Rey with that whiny man-child.

Hello anon,

It’s interesting how people perceive fiction and how they judge others by how they perceive it. There are many things in the fandoms that I’ve participated in that I’m not crazy about, some I outright dislike but I rarely get involved in the anti-movement in fandom. In fact, most of the times I’ve gotten involved is because of aggressive fans who come to me first. I don’t get the idea behind participating in something you don’t enjoy. If I stop enjoying something, then I stop it all together. However, I’ll play, along because you’ve decided to come to me with your grievance. 

Your statement about having a degree in psychology is not only pompous but it’s also meaningless. Unless you also hold a degree in literature and have published and/or done research on the Psychology of Fictional Characters with focus on the Star Wars Universe, your opinion holds doesn’t hold much weight. One of my bachelors is in pre-Law, I can tell you right now that in no way qualifies me to give legal advice. Having a degree in anything doesn’t automatically make you an expert. It’s your perception that whatever relationship exists between Kylo Ren/Ben and Rey is abusive, and that’s fair, it’s your perception, but that does not make it a fact. 

Abuse comes in many different ways and we all perceive abuse differently given our experiences. What I may consider abuse given my experiences with abuse might not be considered abuse by someone else. My view of abuse is that at its core abuse is about creating and maintaining a dynamic in which there is an unbalance of power. The relationship between Kylo Ren’Ben and Rey is a tug and pull by both of them. 

In The Force Awakens Kylo Ren/Ben and Rey were enemies throughout the film and whatever happened between them should be judged on what happens between any two people who find themselves on opposite sides of a war. I don’t see people talking about KR/B actions towards Poe and Finn as abusive and I think the answer is clear, it’s all about gender. Most of the world’s cultures/societies are patriarchal and therefore there is an ingrained misogyny in our thinking that is held by both women and men alike and most people don’t even notice it. The default is the male perspective. I haven’t been part of this fandom very long but when I saw how people used this “talking point” of abuse to drive the narrative of this ship I found it very perplexing. But as I thought about it I realized that what was happening here is that Rey was being infantilized by a certain segment of the fandom. Because of her gender and stature, in comparison to KRB, she was automatically perceived as weaker in the mold of the damsel in distress. However, nothing in TFA hinted at any such “weakness” in fact if I remember correctly the movie ended with Rey defeated KR/B and leaving him with a cheek to chess scar as a reminder of her abilities and strength. By the end of TFA the dynamic between Rey and KR/B is that of two enemies with equal abilities, capable of fighting each other on an even playing field.

In The Last Jedi their dynamic evolves, they go from enemies to something akin to friends and by the end, they are something akin to frenemies. The interesting part is that when they have their first Force Bond, KR/B tries to use his Jedi powers to compel Rey to bring Luke to him, while Rey tries to shoot KR/B. From there KR/B becomes very agreeable, even though Rey’s scar him for life and just tried to shoot him he interested in engaging with her. On the other hand, Rey is still, understandably, really angry and calls him a monster to his face. But as their relationship progresses through their Force Bond they find a connection with one another, based on shared traumas and feelings of loneliness. It becomes an even dynamic between the two. The throne room scene, which many of those who call the relationship abusive use as an example, has KR/B  utter the “you are nothing” phrase to Rey. While KR/B words are harsh, somewhat elites, and extremely inarticulate, if you take the entire scene into consideration I wouldn’t perceive his behavior as abusive. He was speaking the truth, but he said it in a really shitty way, however, being shitty doesn’t make you abusive. It makes you insensitive and in KRB’s case also desperate because he realizes he’s, Rey’s not buying what he’s selling and Rey makes that extra clear by trying to get back her lightsaber. The movie ends with Rey looking over KR/B while he’s on his knees looking defeated.

In fact, for two straight films, Rey has ended the movie standing tall while KR/B has been either on the floor beaten and bleeding or on his knees in defeat. As I said earlier, their dynamic is one of push and pull, but if any of them holds any power over the other it’s clearly Rey. I think antis would have served themselves better by going with the “unhealthy relationship” talking point in order to drive their narrative against the relationship. It’s a hell of a lot less misogynistic and much more realistic and I think a lot more people would be open to discussing it on those terms. Personally, considering that Star Wars is a fairy tale and how they are trying to develop their relationship, I would consider Reylo to be complicated and complex, as all relationship between interesting heroes and villains are.

Speaking of which, I’ll give you the same answer as to why I ship Reylo as I’ve given countless times as why I shipped Jonerys, and that is because that’s what the story is telling me. My personal preferences as to whom I would like character A or B to end up with are irrelevant, I’m not the writer of the story nor do I have any influence over the writing of the story. Having watched the films that’s what I deduced was the course the story was taking and I’ve made a personal decision to embrace it. It’s not a usual dynamic for an endgame couple, given the extremes of their positions, and I think it would make a very interesting story, a complex and complicated story if you will. And as anyone who’s ever shipped Jonerys would tell you, complicated is our middle name. In addition given KR/B’s and Rey’s Force abilities and their positions within their camps, they are equals and they see themselves as equals. 

On a final note, I would suggest you read up on Ben Solo’s background, he didn’t have some idyllic childhood. Take into consideration that Snoke has been praying for him since he was a little boy. It doesn’t excuse his behavior but it certainly puts it into context. Whatever harshness Anakin suffered he didn’t have some in his head manipulating him since he was a little boy.  As for his redemption, I think he deserves to have the opportunity and sometimes it takes a few tries. I also think that’s where the story is headed.

TTFN