#doll part tag

[honeysuckle-venom]

Hi!

🦴 - do you have an innerworld? what does it look like?

💀 - is your system more overt or covert?

Thank you so very much for asking!!!

🦴: We do! We actually have two? For many years the answer to this was no, because most of us didn't have access/didn't know about them/possibly they didn't exist? Unclear. Both inner worlds were like...kind of created during therapy. But they were creating by my therapist asking questions and the answers coming from somewhere deep and true inside and didn't feel like consciously making something up so much as discovering something?

The Dolls have an inner world which pretty much just consists of a snowy Main Street in an undetermined Past (anywhere from like 1850-1950), on which there is an old fashioned toy shop. The toy shop is magical, secret, and slightly sinister, and only appears to certain people. Inside there's the main store as well as a workroom in the back where the dolls are made. The store is full of warm woods and yellow lighting, and on the shelves are dolls, doll houses, doll furniture, doll clothes, and a few other toys like stuffed animals but like 80% of the toys are dolls/doll accoutrements. The dolls move around when you turn your back on them, but freeze when you look. The backroom is slightly darker, and colder, and has dolls in various stages of completion, as well as assorted doll parts and a large bin of broken/failed/rejected/unfinished-and-never-to-be-finished dolls. So yeah, that's what their world looks like.

The main system now has an inner world as well, which we only started to discover about a year ago. There's a part I've mentioned I think only once before on this blog, I call her C. She woke up after over a decade of dormancy almost exactly a year ago. But she hadn't just been dormant; symbolically/internally she had been experienced as dead. But a year ago internally she literally took a deep breath and crawled out of her grave, and when my therapist asked some questions about that it led to the discovery of our inner world. She crawled out into a meadow, surrounded by forest. There's a path through the forest, and it leads to a warm a cozy cottage with a large garden. Cypher had been keeping the cottage ready and set up for when C would arrive and start living there, and Cypher lives there most of the time and takes care of C there. It's a very medieval fairy tale setting. The cottage is deep in the woods. Outside of the woods there is a village, where C and Cypher go on market days. Cypher goes there more often as well, as she's sort of a protector/guardian/knight there and sometimes helps people in the village with things or runs errands for C. The village is in a kingdom and several villages over you can reach the capital, where the palace is. I live in the castle, and in this internal world while C had been dead I was asleep like Sleeping Beauty, as were the other inhabitants of the castle and the immediately surrounding town. C waking up also woke me up. I'm still in the castle, and can't get to C yet, but Cypher and I use magical crows to pass messages back and forth, and if I need to communicate to C then Cypher can pass along a message for me. The rest of us used to be living in various villages and/or the capital, but now that most of use are fused really the world is mostly populated by NPCs if you will, with just me and C and a version of Cypher as distinct alters living there I believe. Cypher and I had/have fused as well, but we kind of split off a piece of Cypher solely internally just to take care of C. Just realized that description was more about internal dynamics than it was a visual description of the world, but whatever, it's a fairy tale world, I'm sure you can picture it.

💀 We used to be pretty overt, but over time we've gotten more and more covert, especially with fusion (which is kind of obvious). So these days we're almost entirely covert, and even though there are times even when fused when a certain part will be a little more in control/we'll be in a [alter's name] mood, it can be very hard to tell I think.

Thank you again for asking!!!

[lunarharp]

..polly pocket au.. (<- a type of doll.)

[b4kuch1n]

siren

[evanostic]

is the dizzy nation still alive

original image under the cut

[puppetmaster13u]

Once more I am rotating both @phoenixcatch7's Possessed Doll Au, and our Meat Marionette Au.

And I am specifically pondering things like the JL magic users' first encounter with the dolls/meat marionettes. Especially those that can see magic or souls.

Because Gotham? Universally acknowledged it's already fucked up. Like there's literal death pits, gravity doesn't work in some places on certain days, whole streets disappear for weeks, hell portals have been opened up (this is literally all canon, no joke) and that's just the tip of the iceberg for a normal month there.

So look, they were honestly expecting some funkiness with a Gotham vigilante. But this? What the fuck is this? They- genuinely, that's horrific-

Huh? No they're not talking appearance wise, that's pretty par for the course actually, no they're talking about whatever the fuck... How is it moving? How is it alive when it's like an amalgamation of all.... that?!

What the Fuck created that thing?!

[clarionglass]

gang,,,,, gang. i am honestly still reeling from The game changer account reblogging the comic,,,, my god. my god.

for newcomers: welcome! thank you for being here!! for those who may have only seen the part of the fic linked to the comic, this is part 6 in the series (because truly i cannot stop myself). all the other parts are linked in the lil game master cinematic universe blurb i've got down the bottom of the post, and the whole thing is now on ao3!

and speaking of my lil blurby thing, if anyone else wants to play around in the game master cinematic universe, tag me so i don't miss it and i'll add whatever you make to the list!! and if you just want to chat about the crossover, hit me up! truly i am so happy to have as many people playing in this sandbox as want to be here :D

but anyway, without further ado:

a selection of correspondence (game master cinematic universe, part 6) | read on ao3

From: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Group <Dropout cast and crew> Subject: Announcements and info

Hi all,

Just a quick announcement that we have a new member of the team joining us at Dropout! Some of you have met him already, although you may not have realised it—he worked on A Game Most Changed and Escape the Greenroom in season 5, and Bingo, Deja Vu, Beat the Buzzer and Sam Says 4 in season 6, doing some of the hosting in my place.

And before you ask how that can be, this man is my exact doppelganger! He’s a time traveling alien who, for the moment, we are calling Other Sam, because we’ve agreed that the name he’s chosen is not exactly appropriate in a workplace setting. He’s here on a kind of rehabilitation program, as shows like Game Changer provide the sort of enrichment that he needs, without him having to resort to things like planetary conquest and murder. We also have him to thank for our new studio—he has kindly allowed us to use his (currently grounded) spacetime machine to record in, seeing as he did blow up our original studio. On an operational basis, nothing should have changed with the studio, but I do recommend you don’t go poking around in cupboards, just in case.

I promise on everything dear to me that this is not a joke.

I hope you’ll all make Other Sam feel welcome! So there’s minimal confusion between the two of us, he and I will be taking care to differentiate ourselves (he says he will try and look, in his words, “more evil”, although I’ll admit I’m not quite sure how that will work).

Series leads and producers, if you would like to include Other Sam in one of your shows, please let me know. He’s a lot of fun to work with, and he’s promised us his best behaviour, so I can guarantee there will be none of the aforementioned planetary conquest and murder. Of course, the wellbeing of all Dropout cast and crew is my highest priority, so if any of you are not comfortable working with him, please let me know as well, and production and I will ensure you are not cast in the same episodes. In future seasons of Game Changer, we will be sharing the hosting duties, so if you’re on an episode, it’ll be made clear which of us you’ll be working with.

On a related note, you know I hate being the bearer of bad news about mandatory seminars, but there is a training seminar next Monday on psychic defence techniques. This seminar is a requirement if you’re going to be working with him, and even if you’re not planning on that, I’d strongly advise coming along anyway.

As always, if you’ve got any questions, don’t hesitate to get in touch!

Cheers, Sam

---

[Note: many responses with the general sentiment of “what the fuck?!” have not been included in the selection of return correspondence.]

---

From: Brennan Lee Mulligan (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

I need this man in the dome immediately. 

---

From: Siobhan Thompson (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hi Sam,

Many thanks for your email, and for letting us know about Other Sam. You don’t need to confirm or deny this, but I’m assuming he did something to us during the Deja Vu recording. I haven’t felt entirely comfortable around you since then, and until now I haven’t been able to find a logical reason why. You mentioned psychic defence techniques in your email, so I take it that there was some kind of mental fuckery involved—perhaps a memory wipe? 

I don’t know what he did, and I’m not sure I want to know, but whatever it is, I don’t think it’s good. I would very much appreciate it if I don’t have to work with him.

Best wishes, Siobhan

---

From: Grant O’Brien (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hey Sam,

I’m already digging up info for a Breaking News segment. There’s someone on reddit called scarfytwin who says they might be able to give us some good info, but I might need to sign a few things first? Looks like it’s tangled up in some British government stuff, which is wild. Sounds juicy, whatever it is, and I reckon it would be good payback…

Best, Grant

---

From: Lou Wilson (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Man, are you telling me that Samuel Dalton was kind of a real fucking thing?? No way. If you let me punch him *hard* one time I’ll go on any show with him.

Cheers, Lou

---

From: Brian David Gilbert (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hi Sam,

This explains a lot about the weird feelings I’ve been having since Deja Vu! I know something terrible probably happened during that recording, but I’d love to just sit down with Other Sam and have a chat. Do you recommend we just meet in a professional context, or would that be something you’re able to organize?

Thanks, Brian

---

From: Zac Oyama (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Cool.

---

From: Ally Beardsley (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Absolute freak behavior and i love this for you, sign me up for anything!

---

From: Mike Trapp (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hi Sam,

Huh, that sure explains some things. This will probably be cool in future, but for right now, I think I need to do a bit of processing. I’ll let you know!

Cheers, Trapp

---

From: Vic Michaelis (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hi Sam,

Intriguing! If you think he’d be up for the prosthetics, I’d love to have either of you on Very Important People next season. Both of you together would be even better!

Vic

---

From: Lily Du (@gmail.com) To: Sam Reich (@droput.tv) Subject: Re: Announcements and info

Hey Sam,

I’ve had a chat to Grant, and I would love to put this guy on Dirty Laundry. Grant says he’ll share what he finds out from the reddit person with me, and we might be able to make a good episode happen.

Cheers, Lily

---

From: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Fwd: Announcements and info

Well, most people seem to have taken it well! Looks like we’ll be having some fun…

---

From: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Re: Fwd: Announcements and info

“Not exactly appropriate in a workplace setting”?

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From: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Re: Re: Fwd: Announcements and info

We discussed this. You agreed.

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From: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Fwd: Announcements and info

I most certainly did not. I said “hm”. “Hm” does not count as agreement.

---

From: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Fwd: Announcements and info

You do know this is a group of people who I can guarantee, on hearing the word “Master”, would react the exact same way Grant did?

---

From: Other Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) To: Sam Reich (@dropout.tv) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Fwd: Announcements and info

Fine. “Other Sam” it is.

---

missed an installment of the game master cinematic universe?

original idea by @ace-whovian-neuroscientist: x

art by @northernfireart concept: x scissor sisters sketch: x sam and his doppelganger: x escape the death beam: x

by @bloopdydooooo drawing collection: x

writing by me (!) part one (escape the greenroom): x part two (deja vu): x part three (sam says 4): x part four (you think you know someone): x part five (point and counterpoint): x part six (a selection of correspondence): you are here!

[basilpaste]

There is something that sits within your chest and it is not a heart.

the chronophagous nine hour drawing.

[eilarae]

yknow murder drones did a really good job at feminism and like yeah it's partially because we get this awesome protagonist who's complex and has agency in the plot and undergoes fantastic character growth and that's great. like solid +20 feminism points good job protagonist uzi

but then we get all these women who are actual freaks who commit atrocities who have murdered countless innocents who are covered in blood and do heinous things on the daily AND BABY NOW THAT'S FEMINISM. +10000000 POINTS GOOD JOB GIRLS KEEP IT UP

[strawberrycamel]

pro tip: if you want to post ship hate for something

[link7057]

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am...

[oosey0]

mizisua

[honeysuckle-venom]

So my fusion question is about the Dolls. I remember in the past you had talked about different groups of dolls and how they felt so much more separate from you, and how even when you felt like you were becoming more integrated with other parts, the Dolls could still make you lose time or there were just much stronger barriers between y’all. What was the fusion process like with these parts from their own subsystem? Did it require a different kind of approach at all? What was the process like for the Dolls to decide to want to work towards fusion?

Oh this is such an excellent question, and one that's quite complicated to answer. This answer is also going to deal non-explicitly with topics of csa, sexuality, and gender, and the interactions between all of those, so blanket tw for that.

I'm going to start off by saying that I don't have a perfect answer for this. In fact, I think there's a small chance that the Dolls haven't fused, though I have a feeling they have. But it's a little harder to tell with them, and the process with them was a bit different, and there's still stuff there that I'm sorting out. In fact, I just had a pretty big Realization TM this morning about some stuff with the Dolls. So yeah, that's still something we're more actively working on. But I'll do my best to explain what I can.

We'd been working in therapy on actively integrating with the Dolls/doing parts work with them long after that stopped being necessary for the main system. We had a number of sessions focused on who they were, what their jobs were, what their inner world was like, how they related to each other and to the main system, etc. We needed to do that kind of more explicit parts work with them because communication was so poor and I really didn't understand them. One of the biggest barriers towards our communication and integration was that I didn't want to understand them, because I didn't like them. I didn't trust them, I didn't like them, I was ashamed of what they represented, I was afraid of what they might make me do. The A Dolls were completely removed from reality in a way that scared me, the C Dolls were cutesy and girly in a way that I was ashamed of, the B Dolls essentially saw themselves as sex toys which terrified me and made me hate them, and all of them forced me to acknowledge trauma I did not want to acknowledge. We had to have a lot of therapy where I dealt with all of that and worked to untangle my negative feelings towards them and learned to direct those feelings towards where they actually belonged (my mother). There was a lot of my therapist working with me to get me to empathize with them and understand where they were coming from, until I finally reached a place where instead of resenting them I was grateful for what they had done for me. That was a very, very important first step.

Once I had started to resent and fear them less, they started to trust me more as well. And they saw the integration we were achieving in the main system and how positive it was, and were I think somewhat intrigued by that. But probably the biggest step for them towards wanting to fuse was thinking about the story of the Velveteen Rabbit, in which a stuffed animal becomes Real through love even as he becomes less and less perfect. It was a childhood favorite of ours, and was the perfect metaphor for recovery for them. I had to learn to speak their language, the language of toys and dollhouses and bedtime stories, in order for them to have an idea of what recovery might look like for them. Once we hit on that story/metaphor in therapy, I think it helped things click for them, and they as a group decided that they wanted to become Real like the Velveteen Rabbit.

After that, we were all kind of on board with them recovering and fusing, and we stopped doing as much active parts work with them. But there was very important other work we needed to do to fuse with them, and that was dealing with the things they represented/were for/protected us from/held. A LOT of my work in therapy over the last several months has dealt with issues of sexuality, gender, and trauma related to those topics, which are kind of the main reasons the Dolls existed. Those topics are very intense ones for me, and not ones I talk about a lot publicly, but figuring out some things about my sexuality and gender identity has been a really significant part of recovery for me. The process of integrating with the Dolls for me was in large part the process of becoming less afraid of sex and less afraid of my femininity. I never achieved full communication with the Dolls like I had with members of the main system, which is part of why I'm not entirely positive that we've fused. We got better at communicating, and I had a better grasp of who they were and what they wanted, but we were never able to have internal dialogue the way the rest of us could. But what I did do was look at why they were the way they were and start dealing directly in therapy with the things they held, and as we did that I think we started to fuse even without much direct communication or time spent cofronting. I worked very hard to accept that they were part of the whole, just like all the rest of us, and that the things they held onto were in fact my things that I had to deal with if we wanted progress. So I did. We spent session after session on topics of sex, and trauma, and kink, and gender, and the relationships between those things for me. And I started to have a much clearer sense of who I was in relation to those topics and what I wanted. And as I did the Dolls weren't...necessary in the same way anymore. And I also did a lot of trauma work about stuff with my mom, and they were able to be more open to accepting that she had hurt us in a way that they hadn't been in the past, now that trust had built up between us. They accepted that to become Real they had to let go of their intention to go back to her, and that in return I would accept many of their desires as my own and stop being so afraid of the things I had forced them to hold rather than face.

Fusing with the Dolls, like fusing with all of our parts, was a trauma recovery and identity acceptance journey more than anything else. In that way it was quite similar to all of our other fusion. It didn't look at all like the fusion narrative we see a lot where people slowly work to communicate more, then cofront more, then blend, then fuse. None of our fusion actually looked like that, but it especially wasn't like that with the Dolls, which leads me to sometimes worry that we didn't fuse with them. But actually I think we did. Instead for us fusion has always happened subconsciously and naturally as we deal with processing our trauma and accepting ourself. With the Dolls especially it was just about integrating the underlying trauma and identity pieces I had rejected and that they held onto. That's where my focus was, and we did that, and that has felt really, really amazing. A huge huge part of fusion for me has been a process of accepting all of myself, especially the parts of myself I was afraid and/or ashamed of. That's been the key to a lot of it, but especially to my work with the Dolls.

[art-o-gant]

STEAMPUNK ERA NEW ALBION BLAST

[lady-lessobian]

Gonna be so for real it's weird as fuck for people to be shipping mouthwashing characters,,,,,, like did we not take any of the themes away from this

[lovelyrotter]

can we all remember to just say 'oh no thank you, i dont like that kind of food' but apply that logic and rules to shipping and letting other people ship again

[r0tt1ngang3l]

there’s a boy on the bus who looks exactly like young jeffrey dahmer i’m genuinely scared🪽ིྀ