#dog clothes waterproof

[foldingfittedsheets]

When I was working at the sex shop I was pulling poverty wages. I loved my job but I was on food stamps and still barely getting by. When they hired the stores first male employee and he started at my pay rate after I’d been there for three years I quit.

I was initially really nervous when I saw the post for the mattress job. It listed a pay scale that I couldn’t even conceptualize and I appeared qualified. When I got an interview I was over the moon but also petrified. Reactions to my line of work often varied but most people were very embarrassed or skeptical. I worried about how I’d address it in the actual interview.

I lived far to the north of their headquarters and drove almost two hours to get there. When I finally arrived it was in the nicest thrift store clothes I could find, but I shrank inside to see a room full of older white men in nice suits waiting to be interviewed for the same job.

Why did I bother? I was decades younger than anyone else in the room, shabbily dressed, and I suspected I was the only afab person in the entire building. I stewed in my insecurities until I was called in.

The second I met my interviewer I was instantly put at ease. The man had the energy of a therapy dog, he was abound with positive, good natured energy. He was also incredibly beautiful. I grinned back at his welcoming smile as we said our pleasantries. But still. This very beautiful polished man seemed very innocent. How would the sex shop question go?

“I see here you worked at STORE?”

“Yes,” I said hesitantly.

“And that was sales? Or you just rang people up.”

“No, it was sales. I’d help people find products, we were encouraged to upsell, there was sales spiffs, and most importantly we educated customers on products to help them find what they liked best.”

He grinned approvingly and asked, “Can you give me an example of a time you successfully upsold a customer?”

I paused, wringing my hands before I asked, “How vague would you like me to be…?”

“Not at all!” He assured me. “Go for it!”

“Well. A man came in looking for something to make his fingers vibrate so when he was touching his wife it would enhance that sensation. We had cheap $10 cockrings that I showed him first. But we had a rechargeable waterproof one made of nicer material, and after I showed him a demo he bought that one.”

“How much was that one?”

“$110”

“Wow! You had an upsell of 100% from what he came in looking for! That’s incredible!”

He was so truly genuinely stoked and not at all embarrassed that for the first time I saw a tiny glimmer of a future where I didn’t have ramen and peanut butter tiding me over between paychecks.

He asked me to wait then came back to tell me he liked me so much that he wanted to send me right into another interview, if that was okay. He didn’t want me to have to drive back later, it was terribly considerate and exciting. I beamed and told him it would be lovely.

I then had the second worst interview I’ve ever had. The worst goes to the time I applied to be a store manager for a pet food place years later. The district and store manager interviewing me passed notes and texted while I was speaking. When the district manager called to inform me I didn’t get the job I told him I’d never have accepted anyway because I’d never had such a disrespectful interview.

The new man sitting behind the desk radiated an aura of a brick wall. As someone with anxiety I’m highly keyed into the emotional states of people I’m talking to. To receive no feedback at all was my personal hell. After a perfunctory greeting he asked me with no inflection to sell him a pen.

I gathered the shreds of my courage and attempted the Herculean task he’d set me. Through my whole improvised spiel he resisted all attempts at engaging him, regarding me with a cold apathy as I touted the benefits of my fictitious pen.

Halfway through I broke into a cold sweat. My smile didn’t waver but it grew strained as I projected friendliness and warmth into the black hole of his heart. My thoughts scattered and my sales pitch grew redundant in the face of his nothingness. I finally concluded with a hard close and he simply nodded.

He glanced at my resume and commented, “You didn’t ask me to touch or hold it. Though I suppose I can understand from your previous line of work why you wouldn’t.” I shriveled and died inside knowing that I encouraged people to touch dildos all day long and had been too frazzled to offer him the pen.

He bid me a cool farewell. I made it to my car before I started sobbing. I had never been so rattled. I couldn’t understand what I’d done to make him so unfriendly or if my threadbare clothes were what had made him treat me like dirt. I drove an hour and a half to get home, weeping intermittently.

I was therefore taken by complete surprise to receive a call the next day inviting me on board for their five week training program. The first man who’d interviewed me gushed on the phone about how the second guy had loved me and that I was going to be fantastic.

I was in shock. When I showed up to training the second interviewer was charming my new classmates, beaming and laughing. He was an utterly different person. To my dismay I learned he was the trainer for my district and would be my point of contact if I made it through training.

He joked with me later that his interview facade was just a tactic to see how people held up under pressure and I filed him into a category of my deepest enmity. I never forgave him for how small he made me feel that day, but I never showed him the depths of my fury.

I aced every test and went on to be valedictorian of the eight people who had survived the rigorous training process to earn a sales position. When I got my first paycheck I bought myself new clothes, the first non-thrifted things I’d owned in years.

[totoshappylife]

Portable strong light flashlight rechargeable outdoor super bright long shot household durable multifunctional portable searchli

Price: model; ss-6103 color chassification; Color chassification; blue/red lampbeads; 4 white led /1 purple led mode; white light/plrple light battery capacity; 400mah charging time; 15 hours battery life; white light 12 hours/purple light 8 hours material; abs plastic weight; 92g window.adminAccountId=2672137760;

[merakiui]

bestie!vil who casually fixes your boobs in your bra for you, no he did not just tweak your nipple, do you think he's one of those desperate dogs you spend so much time with? He also calls you out on your posture and says it comes from the pelvis, he knows a few massages and stretches if you're interested. You want to try on his lipstick shade? Well, he doesn't want to contaminate the entire tube so...mwah! What? It's not like it meant anything, you're best friends after all.

One of the girls!Cater who walks around in his boxer-briefs during a sleepover or before bed. When you wake up he's always cuddled up to your back, morning wood grinding into you but he needs his cuddles, dont neglect him! Also he saw the prettiest thongs at VS, and since a few of yours went missing, you should totes go buy some new ones. Cater thinks you're soooo cute first thing in the morning, too sleepy and tired to realize that he slid his underwear down and has been leaking all over the back of your tanktop the entire time :(

-👠 anon (i think tumblrs been eating my asks D:)

OTL sitting in best friend Vil's lap while he does your makeup... there's nothing to it! Just two besties giving each other makeovers. If you feel something prodding at your ass every time you shift on his lap, pay it no mind. And if Vil grabs your hips and forces you still, don't worry about that either. If you keep moving so much, he'll mess up your eyeliner! You don't want that, do you?

AND CAY-CAY WITH MORNING WOOD AAAAAAAA. It's still so early and you're much too sleepy to realize his dick is between your thighs and he's been slowly and carefully rutting into you every now and then. Quite literally fucks you back to sleep. <3 just let your bestie cuddle with you a little longer. It's so warm and cozy, and he's massaging your hip so sweetly. You doze off within seconds, leaving Cater with enough time to reach his climax and clean you up before you're waking another hour later.

Being besties with Idia and the two of you watch hentai together and rank the ahegao of every character. >:D the tier list is coming along nicely. You're lying on your stomach on his bed while he's gaming, and it hasn't yet occurred to Idia that this entire time he's been hanging out weekly with a girl. But then he starts thinking deeply about it and suddenly his mind is racing with thoughts. orz

Besties with Ace and Deuce, who have slept over so many times that at this point Ramshackle is like a second home to them. They know where you keep everything. Where all of the snacks are hidden from Grim. Which drawers hold your clothes and, most importantly, undergarments. Ace is probably so sneaky and nosy that he goes so far as trying to sniff out if you've got any sex toys hidden somewhere. Deuce is curious, but he has to be nice and respectful of your space like a good best friend. He's only following Ace to make sure he doesn't do anything weird while you're washing up in the bathroom. It's not so he can also learn the location of these toys and compare his size to the size of the dildos. T_T

Being besties with Azul and he's managed to become so comfortable around you that he allows you to relax in the pool with him while he's busy multitasking with all eight of his tentacles. You're happily swimming laps and trying (and failing) to get him to take a break and join you. He keeps you at a distance with one tentacle, pushing you away and claiming, "Not now. This is very important and requires all of my focus." You pout and whine. Maybe he entertains you with that same tentacle, playfully poking and prodding at you while his eyes remain glued to the (magically waterproof) contract he's reviewing. He knows exactly what he's doing when he "accidentally" manhandles you with his tentacle, so much so that your swimsuit top comes untied. Oh dear. Would you look at that? It's come off. <3

[butchvampireheimerdinger]

any sevika x butch reader hcs? :P

i see her as soooo butch4butch omg. Transgression is so core to her characterization and I think she would find gender non-conforming dykes soooo attractive. Anyways

Butch4butch! Sevika x reader headcanons

✯ You’ve both got lil peach fuzzy moustaches and neither of u remove ur facial hair so when u kiss ur moustaches tickle each other a little bit.

✯ You’re both rather lesbian obviously and so your love for women n other queer people extends beyond romance. If some dude is bothering some poor chick at the bar, you become the Woman Protection Squad. You’re everyone’s lesbian moms/guard dogs.

✯ Idk who her parents are but she gives off military brat vibes/raised by a strict army father. Now she’s incredibly anti-military (”I didnt always see eye to eye with my old man) but she makes her bed meticulously army style. She’s disciplined like that.

✯ It drives her wild seeing you in “more refined” clothing. Which, for her, means pants without holes that are not jeans, and one of your gay little button ups you probably have. Especially when she becomes a counselor and you show up in Piltover all dyked out in your menswear. Old rich ladies are clutching their pearls and she could probably just take you right there.

✯ Your fav Sevika outfit is the rumpled boxers and wife pleaser combo. Nuff said. Also you share a closet and there’s not a really clear boundary with what belongs to who, except for a few items of clothing that are your “signature.” Like your leather punky battle vest. And her poncho.

✯ You guys would be the punky type of older lesbians that never fought for gay marriage because it was seen as assimilating to a heteronormative society and making queerness palatable to a straight audience. Regardless, you do refer to each other as life partners, domestic partners, sometimes wife. Not really girlfriend unless in a cutesy ironic sorta way.

✯ And as for cutesy nicknames? You call each other “my butch.” Or “my woman” or “my old lady.”

✯ If you did end up having a ceremony with friends and family to celebrate your bond, its double suits fosho. Not exactly matching, but complementary. Maybe borrowed parts from friends and family because who is gonna buy a new suit in this economy? We have a revolution to run!!

✯ It’s at The Last Drop obvs and you hop behind the bar and pour beers, getting your suit all wet. Instead of a bouquet toss, all the single people gather for a rapidfire round of blackjack for who’s the next to get married.

✯ Your “honeymoon” is camping in the nearest wilderness. its all either of you had ever dreamed of. You ride off on your shimmer motorcycle with a billion illegal modifications with cans hanging from it and a sign on the back that says “just hitched.” And you get to watch her chop wood. And she gets to watch you gut a fish. It’s like butchdyke brokeback mountain.

✯ Housework isn’t a masculinity or femininity thing to either of you. She can cook meat, you can do all the plants and veggies cause maybe ur like a gym bro health nut type. Her tendency to load up on protein and nothing else drives you up the wall. “Colorful plate, Sev.”

✯ She does vacuuming and laundry cause she likes to fold stuff a certain way. You do dishes cause neither of you are sure just how waterproof her arm is. And you pick up the clutter so she doesn’t irritate her bad back.

✯ She grills on the barbecue at the summer parties. You pour drinks and set up the trampoline and tetherball thingy/yard games for the kiddos

✯ Affectionate touches include: ruffling each other’s short hair. Pulling you in by the belt loops. Absentmindedly straightening ur rolled up sleeves. You like to rest your head in her lap when its the two of you on the couch and you don’t feel like talking. She uses ur head as a little desk for whatever she’s reading.

✯ You both wear gay little rectangular reading glasses. At night she reads whatever religious text Janna worshippers use in bed next to you and you gab. She peers over her lil glasses at u. Zaun is more religious than Piltover so maybe you both are people of the faith. But if religious trauma exists in this context and you’ve got it, she would always be respectful cause she knows what its like to feel like an outsider.

✯ Obviously you work out together, but neither of you have a consistent routine for that cause ur gay and probably have adhd and her line of work has inconsistent hours.

✯ You have a punching bag in the basement and sometimes the two of you let off steam by punching it back and forth like pingpong. (That’s not how punching bags move, but use your imagination.)

✯ It’s never been a plan for the two of you to have kids and i don’t see formal adoption/ivf/sperm donors being widely accessible in the undercity. But i can see it happening where a disparaged youth on the street adopts the two of you and you become parental figures in that way. Maybe you take in a young trans fellow with a rocky home life. also there’s isha.

✯ If you end up with a younger child in ur care, they call you mama sev or mama vika and mama y/n. Or a cultural name for mom if you have one.

✯ Sevika would be weirdly good with kids because she sees them as people with feelings. She wouldn’t talk down to them or anything. She would be the bad cop but also kind of a gentle parent type. And you know how people sometimes put their naughty kittens or puppies in “air jail?” She is buff enough to do that with her kid one handed until they’re at least ten. And she is the BEST at doing the airplane thing.

Fin.

[chaos-chloe]

Mezcal Sour - Droid X F!Reader

Summary: Jealousy and Alcohol mixed together can lead to something catastrophic or wil it be fortuitous?

TW: Alcohol, flirting(?), cursing, female pronouns, jealousy, bar/club atmosphere, lmk me know if i missed anything <3

WRD CT: 3.5K

*Hey ____ we are all headin to the club down the street in about 30-45 mins, if you want to come*

*who is all gonna be there*

*Me, Grizzy, Puffer, and yourrrr homeboy, you definitely dont like*

*oh STFU!*

*yes, ill come tho. Ill get ready in 30*

*cool see ya soon*

I threw my phone down to my right side and flopped back on my bed with a huff. I laid there for a few minutes trying to piece a cute outfit together in my head with the clothes I bought for the con. Once I finally figured out what I was going to wear and how I was gonna style it, I got to work. I dug through my messily packed suitcase, grabbed my makeup case, my hair products and headed to the bathroom. I hung my outfit on the back of the bathroom door on hangers to let the heat try to unwrinkle them as much as possible.

After getting my clothes settled I started unpacking my makeup bag and plugged in my hair crimper. Letting my crimper heat up, I get started on my makeup, basic as hell. I know I'm probably going to sweat it off if I do a full glam look. I reached with my right hand for my tinted moisture, and did two pumps in my left hand. Rubbing my hands together, trying to achieve an even amount of product in both hands, my hands separate stretching my hands to my face. I began to gloss the moisture all over my face, after rubbing it in completely I was letting it dry. 

I grabbed my black, one shoulder, black velvet textured material shirt and threw it on, so i didn't mess my hair or my “makeup” up. I then went on a seek and find hunt on the counter for my fluffy makeup brush and my Urban Decay nude palette. Once, both items were in my hand, I dipped my brush in the light tannish/brown color and painted my eyelid. Packed the corner of my eyelid with the most pigment then blending it out towards the inner corner of my eyelid, to give it an ombre effect. 

When both eyes are done I then grab my waterproof Fenty Beauty mascara and try to volumize these small and thin eyelashes.  My___ eyes raked over my face to see if my work was exceptional or needed more effect, I believed I looked good just needed clear lip gloss and my make up was finished. 

After applying the tube of Tik Tok shop brand lip gloss, my lips are extra kissable tonight, hopefully.  I turned around on my heel to snag my skinny black jeans off the hanger without breaking the cheap plastic. I walked out of the bathroom to my hotel bed to sit on the end, so i wouldn’t have to balance to put on my pants. Now, I got my pants up and went to my carry on which I had my shoes packed.

I did a double take/thoughton which shoes to wear but ultimately I went with my strappy, criss cross black heels with a gold accent on the bridge. This time I balanced myself with my right hand on the wall to put on my left heel and vice versa with the other heel. I tripled checked my outfit and gave myself a pep talk to get my confidence up. I'm thinking tonight might be the night I'm not a pussy. 

 *BEEP BEEP*

*im headin to your room, 222?

*yes, im almost ready, should be ready when you get here*

*just lettin ya know, that the guys are coming w/ me**

*damn, ugh okay.*

*NOW YOU HAVE ME EXTRA NERVOUS*

*HEY youll be okay, ill play along to see if we can get droid to confess to you ;)*

*now youre in the dog house, your buying me my first drink*

*fine fine, i can do that ;)*

I shook my head at his ridiculously confidence that Droid will confess to me. I ran over to my bag and grabbed my deodorant and perfume and applied where it matters, I NEED to smell good and not like sweat. 

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

I ran my hands over my outfit to get the sweat and nerves off of me, I let my confidence take over, so I am not a complete mess. I opened the door to see the guys all looking nice.

“Well hello gorgeous, let me walk you to your car.” Droid says with his arm out, I chuckle as I take his arm. Everyone chuckles at Droid playing a gentleman back in the days.

“Good sir, you are aware that we are walking to a club, definitely not driving.” I go with the bit but still keep it real.

“Oh well- I-Erm- Let me walk you to your destination good lady.” Droid stumbles through his sentence, ending it with laughter but still having arms linked together.

We are walking to the elevator with small talk going on throughout the groups, I’m keeping quiet, I look over to Pezzy and he just winks at me. I wink back as he raises an eyebrow at me, Droid catches on to us being silly.

“Wait- What's going on here? Is my fair maiden cheating on me? With a lonely scum?” Droid acts offended at us play flirting

“No, No my good sir. I could never lay my eyes on a lonely scum. My eyes only work for you.” I responded with his humor.

“Ugh, how dare you do this to me?!” Droid keeps the joke going, letting go of my arm pretending to be offended.

I walk out of the elevator laughing and shaking my head. Pezzy catches up to me, since I was the first one off the elevator. Droid, Puffer, and Grizzy are all in their own conversation walking behind us, leaving Pezzy and I to talk about my hopeless crush.

The pulsating bass thumped through the dimly lit nightclub, a hypnotic rhythm that engulfed the crowd. Strobe lights danced across the room, creating a dizzying kaleidoscope of color. Laughter mingled with the music, the sounds faded into a dull roar for me. I leaned against the bar, nursing her drink while casting furtive glances towards Droid.

He was surrounded by a trio of girls, their laughter ringing like chimes against the booming bass. Each of them leaned in closer, their voices rising in pitch, a chorus of flirty teasing that made my blood simmer. One girl, a tall blonde with sparkling blue eyes, tossed her hair back and laughed a little too loudly, her hand brushing against Droid’s arm. I felt a knot tighten in my stomach as I watched him smile, his head thrown back in genuine amusement. 

My grip on my glass tightened as I forced herself to take a deep breath. 

"It's just harmless fun," I told myself, but the whisper of doubt crept in. Was it really just fun? The way they leaned in, the playful nudges, the seemingly endless flow of laughter? Each giggle felt like a tiny dagger, and the more I watched, the tighter the knot in my stomach twisted. Did I really have the confidence to confess anymore?

I turned my gaze to the floor, where clusters of people danced with abandon, illuminated by a flurry of colorful lights. But even in that moment, the joy around me felt hollow. I took a sip of my drink, letting the icy burn of the alcohol sting my throat. I just want to shake off the feeling, to enjoy the night, but every time I glanced back at Droid, my heart plummeted further into the void. 

“Hey, you okay?” Pezzy slid up beside me, concern etched across his face. 

I forced a smile, masking my insecurities. “Yeah, just... soaking it all in,” I replied, my voice lacking its usual spark of light. 

Pezzy followed my line of sight. The trio of girls was still clustered around Droid, their voices overlapping in a playful symphony that made my chest tight. 

“I mean, it’s just a night out, right? He’s not going anywhere,” I asked, reaching down into myself for reassurance. Pezzy squeezed my shoulder, knowing Droid, he shook his head yes.

“You know you’re the one he wants to be with,” Pezzy said, a mix of encouragement and irritation in her voice. “Why would he waste his time with them?”

I wish I knew that Pezzy was right. I thought Droid and I had something real, something special—yet watching him shine under those girls’ attention felt like stumbling under a spotlight that I couldn’t escape. Each shared laugh felt like another inch of emotional space carved between us.

Finally, gathering myself resolve, I pushed away from the bar. “I’m going to go talk to him, and possibly put our plan into action.” I declared, trying to inject confidence into my words, even if it felt forced. Pezzy raised an eyebrow, his expression cautious but supportive. Using the fake enhanced confidence that the alcohol gave me, I strut my way to them.

As I neared the group, my heart raced, adrenaline coursing through my veins. I could hear them clearly now—each flirty comment, each teasing remark pierced me. But I refused to be sidelined on my own crush.

“Hey, handsome!” I called out, forcing a smile that was perfectly poised between casual and confrontational. Droid turned, his face lighting up with surprise that quickly melted into warmth. The girls paused, their chatter dwindling as they sized me up with easy curiosity. 

“Hey, ____!" Droid's voice was inviting, and despite the tension, Ifelt a small flicker of relief. 

I sidled up next to him, my hand settling possessively on his arm. “I thought I’d come check on you,” I said, my voice casual, though my heart raced. The trio exchanged glances, the atmosphere thickening as they silently gauged the shift.

Droid grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “Good timing! We were just talking about the wildest things we’ve seen in the club.” 

I smiled back, tightening my grip. “Oh, I hope I’m not missing out on any crazy stories. Need someone to help filter through the nonsense?” 

The girls exchanged a look, and I could feel the tension palpably shift. Just like that, I stepped into the spotlight—but this time, I wasn't leaving it vacant.

As the strobe lights flickered like fireflies caught in a jar, I felt the energy in the air shift. The laughter of the trio of girls dulled, replaced by a charged silence that hung between them. I stood shoulder to shoulder with Droid, my heart pounding, not just from the music, but from the surge of confidence coursing through me.

The blonde girl, who had been the most animated of the group, arched an eyebrow, her smile faltering for a moment. “Oh, we were just having a little fun,” she said, her tone light but with an undercurrent that hinted at challenge.

“Fun’s good,” I replied, her voice steady and laced with playful defiance. “But I think Droid’s got the best stories. Right, handsome?”

Droid turned to me, his expression softening, and I could see the flicker of appreciation in his eyes. “Yeah, you know it,” he said, a grin breaking free as he leaned closer to I, his body language shifting to indicate that I was his priority. 

I felt a wave of relief wash over me. The girls were evaluating the situation, their playful banter fading as they processed the unspoken challenge I had thrown into the mix. “So what’s the wildest thing you’ve seen tonight?” I prompted, my tone teasing as I addressed the girls, confident in my role as the center of Droid’s universe.

“Oh, you know, just the usual. People dancing on tables, a few questionable outfits,” one of the girls chimed in, her tone shifting to a more inclusive one. “But I think the best part is when someone tries to ride the bull over there.” She gestured toward a group of people erupting in laughter as someone dramatically fell to the floor, arms flailing.

I laughed, the tension between them beginning to dissipate. “Now that sounds like something we need to get on. Don’t you think, Droid?” She turned to him, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Absolutely!” Droid replied, his enthusiasm infectious. “I’m always down for something new.”

“Count me in!” I said, feeling a surge of exhilaration as I extended my hand to Droid. He took it without hesitation, and together we moved toward the dance floor, the pulsating bass thudding in time with their racing hearts.

The girls trailed behind, their earlier bravado diminished as I and Droid lined up for the fake bull riding. The club was doing a special, where before you “start” riding the bull you can take 1 or 2 shots of liquor being poured into your mouth by one of the bartenders. We walked right up where we could put our names, Droid wrote his name down first but I was distracted with the gorgeous bartender in front of me.

“Hey-um- oh- Lisa, I have a weird request, I used to be a bartender. Is there any way I could pour his shot or two in his mouth? I will even pay extra if needed.” I questioned with persuasiveness, since I had my confidence up might as well do stupid shit.

“Ooo, let me ask my manager, Ronnie, real quick. Be right back, love.” Lisa states walking to the bar calling out to Ronnie. 

I turned on my heel looking for the guys, who were all gathered up on the left side of the fence of the bull keeping drunk people out. I strutted my way up to my group of the guys, Pezzy turned his head over his shoulder to look at me. The confusion on his face quickly turned into a devious smirk, he wink at me. Pezzy opened his arm to me, I quickly fell into place under his arm. 

“What did you ask, little demon?” Pezzy entertained my plan

“I can possibly give the droid a shot, once he gets on the bull,” I got on my tippy-toes to whisper in his ear, wanting to make sure he heard me over the music.

“Hey, now don't leave me out. What's going on?” Puffer sauntered over to us seeing us scheming together.

“I MIGHT be able to give Droid his shot before he rides the bull.” I explained to Puffer, typing my glass towards Grizzy and Droid deep in their own conversation. 

“Oh- There you are, love.” I heard someone say behind me, I let go of Pezzy and spun on my heels. I saw Lisa with a guy. Hopefully it's Ronnie with good/fun news.

“Hi, I’m Ronnie, the manager. I heard you are wanting to give a guy a shot before he gets on the bull, is that right?” He contemplated the plan, his tone giving it away. 

“Yes, I’m ____. I used to be a bartender for 4 years, I believe 5 years ago.” I greeted Ronnie, trying to persuade him into letting me do it. 

“Okay, good. Yeah, I’m down letting you do it, just know no heels on the inflatable or on the bull.” Ronnie informed me while pointing to my shoes.

“Ah, completely understandable, sir. Is it okay if I take my heels off and do it barefoot?” I try to compromise with him. 

“Sounds good to me, Lisa and Hannah are in charge of the bull at the moment so they will oversee you giving your guy the shot.” Ronnie informed me, we shook hands and he dispersed back to the bar. I giggled doing baby jumps in my heels.

“Give us like less than 5 minutes, love, and will call him next.” Lisa informed me with her left hand on my shoulder, walking away to the podium of the sign up sheet.

They get him on the bull, while explaining the rules and how to ride the bull, so you don't completely fly off the bull. As they finish explaining the rules, It looks like Hannah lets him go in a couple of circles to get him going. That's when Lisa comes over with a bottle of Tito’s with a smile and hand gestures to me, to follow her and hurry up.

“Alrighty girl, make sure to take off your heels, when you get up to bull; the head is going to be angled down, so you can hop on there with your knees. Try to use the inflatable barrier as a trampoline to bounce your way up on it. Then, you are going to stand up and push him, however you can or want to, into a laying down position and then pour the shot in his mouth. Sounds good?” Lisa talked me through the plan on how they do it here, as I was undoing my heels. I discarded them at the entrance of the padded inflatable. 

“Go get him girly.” Lisa encouraged me as I entered the zone of the bull. I turned my head over my shoulder to her and gave her a smile and wink of appreciation.

“What? ___ what are you doing?” Droid asked me with his eyebrows furrowed at me

I walked up to the bull remembering what Lisa said, I bounced my body onto the bull. Droid had his hand out to me, trying to help me up on the bull.  I landed on the bulls neck with my knees, and Droid kept both of his arms open making sure I didn't fall while I tried to stand up. I positioned my right hand on his left shoulder, so I balanced myself enough not to fall on my face. Then, I parked my right barefoot on his chest pushing him back all the way. Motioning my hand all the back on the bull. He is finally in position, relaxed with his mouth opened.

“Okayyy then __.” Droid said, making me smirk and my heart race, as if it was a jump set being played. 

I started pouring Tito’s and counting to four, while locking our eyes together; I winked at him with a sultry look. 

“OH SHIT. AW SHIT MAN!” “OOOO” “GET EM ___!” I heard the guys screaming on the top of their lungs, over the music. 

I stopped pouring the alcohol in Droid mouth, I jumped off the bull handing the bottle over to Hannah. I walked out of the landing zone, and picked my shoes up til I got away from the entrance. I walked over to Pezzy, Puffer, and Grizzy where I was ready for the onslaught of questions from them. 

“So how was being dominant for your first time?” Puffer asked right out of the blue, bluntly. I giggled and shook my head, trying to put my heels on. 

“When did you get the idea for this, __?” Grizzy asked

“Earlier today, when we were all walking to the bar, Pezzy informed me of it.” I told them shrugging my shoulders.  I looked round through my hair as I was hunched over tying my right heel up, I was watching Droid walk up the group. He was on a mission to get his hands on me, I can tell. 

“My lady, let me help you. You are looking like Cinderella, with your missing heel.” Droid jokes around with me, he walked up to me and kneeled down on his right knee. 

He picks up my left heel, separating the laces not getting them tangled up even more which was even more impressive. He then clasped his hand around my left ankle to lift my foot up to his knee where my heel(shoe) was resting. My foot was in the heel, as he was perfectly criss crossing the laces in an even manner, mirroring my right foot.

“Well Droid, look at you taking care of our own little Cinderella.”Grizzy jokes around, making the guys laugh and me hiding my face turn red. 

“Let me steal ___ for a minute.” Droid said, putting my foot back down on the ground. He stood up,  outstretching his hand for me to take. 

He led us out the dance floor while the music was playing, he took the lead of the dance. Our chemistry is undeniable. The strobe lights illuminated their movements, casting us in shades of electric blue and hot pink, as laughter and music swirled around us.

As the dance took off, it was a playful chaos of flailing limbs and exaggerated moves. The crowd cheered, and I found myself lost in the moment, the earlier insecurities fading into the backdrop of the vibrant nightclub. I stole glances at Droid, who was in his element, and I felt a warmth blooming in my chest.

As the music swelled and the crowd erupted in cheers, I caught Droid’s eye. We exchanged a look, one that said more than words ever could. It was a silent promise, a reassurance that we were in this together, and that nothing could shake the foundation we are going to build together. 

The night wore on, the bass thumping like a heartbeat, and for the first time, I felt truly free, dancing not just to the music, but to the rhythm of my own confidence.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana Drabbles: Explanation and Masterlist

I'm going to add examples below, but drabbles can range from several sentences to several paragraphs and cover everything from humor to angst to fluff! They're written more like train-of-thought fanfic, instead of the structured bullet points I use in HCs. What really sets them apart though is that drabbles focus on one or two characters at a time and are not limited to the M6!

Drabbles can be as oddly specific as you want, to as randomized as you want. Here's some examples of what you could request, and some links of past drabbles -

"I really like the idea of a cozy night in with Portia where she takes care of my hair, could you write a drabble for that?"

"Can I have drabbles of Selasi being just The Best to MC?"

"I have this really specific bittersweet moment in my head - [insert description here] - could you do a drabble of that with whichever M6 parent you think fits it best?"

"How about a drabble for [specific character]? Whatever you want to write about them!"

Julian and quill pens

Portia's hair

Asra and Muriel and campfire teamaking

Nadia and Favorite Foods

Scout's self care

Lucio's hair

Inanna and Muriel

Mercedes and Melchior and Lucio

Chandra missing Nadia

Malak and Julian

Pepi being a Cat

Faust and Asra and Faust's knife

Cuddling Birblian

MC transforms into a "monster"

Vesuvia Weekly: Baby Fever (M6 oneshot)

M6 building IKEA furniture

Lucio realizing the dogs are his familiars

Family-burdened MC and nothing-is-taboo Lucio

Asra's sweet tooth

Julian and his waterproof plague clothes

Nadia's poorly-worn clothes pet peeve

Portia's garden

Muriel's favorite colors

Vesuvia Weekly: Don't Wake MC!

Vesuvia Weekly: "Why are we hiding?"

Modern AU Pre-Prologue Setup

Work Lunches with Asra

Julian's Pirate Adventures

Prince!Lucio and Bodyguard!MC

Prince!Lucio and Bodyguard!MC, pt 2

M6 vs Mechanical Bull (oneshot)

Comforting Julian during a storm

Bodyguard!Muriel and Royalty!MC

Julian when MC gets tendonitis

Vesuvia Weekly: Learning (love) Languages

Vesuvia Weekly: Guilty Pleasures (poorly doodled)

Inanna protecting MC's stuffed animal

Malak upstaging Julian (on purpose)

Faust and Asra trying to learn MC's secrets

Chandra trying to share her puzzles with MC

Pepi sharing her secrets with MC

Mercedes and Melchior "helping" Lucio be a good boy

(Art prompt) Muriel's prosthetic proposal

Youngest Child Nadia

Honorary Grandma Portia

Big Brother Julian

Ageing Lucio angst

Resilient Asra angst

Asra's inherited fashion sense

Nadia the Countess Engineer

Julian as a castmate

Lucio's dental habits

Portia's domestic feminine rage

Muriel's bad posture

Julian and the canals

Asra and weekly dusting

Nadia and the South End Theatre

Muriel's pockets

Portia's to-do list

Lucio's bathtime

Post-upright route evening with Nadia, Asra, and Julian

Julian & Portia talk to Malak & Pepi

Knight!Muriel and Royalty!MC, pt 2

M6 all cook in one place

Asking Muriel to crush a watermelon between his thighs

Prince!Julian and bodyguard!MC

MC and Julian get arrested while Portia bails them out

When Muriel's kid is a walking heart attack

Mercedes and Melchior accidentally halfway merge

Julian getting used to normalcy

Asra sharing a bed with you

Nadia sharing her room for the first time

Muriel sharing his thoughts with you

Portia getting used to your attention

Lucio not understanding your love

Julian when you're stressed and quietly waiting

Asra when you've been wronged by someone

Nadia's fluctuating code of ethics

Muriel's scathing letter talents

Portia on AITA

Lucio realizing he can weaponizing his capacity to annoy

Vesuvia Weekly: A Date With Disaster

Vesuvia Weekly: To be loved is to be ...

Motorcycle Mishap

Julian with an MC who smells their hair to think

Vesuvia Weekly: MC is M6's embodied impulse control

Vesuvia Weekly: Sleepover Horrors

Vesuvia Weekly: One More Dance Before Bed (Julian)

Vesuvia Weekly: Moments of Reprieve

Trick or Treat: Khamgalai's coping mechanisms

Trick or Treat: Aisha and Salim's water lanterns

Trick or Treat: Palace Passageways

Trick or Treat: Bribing Mazelinka

Trick or Treat: Vesuvian Canal Culture

Trick or Treat: Selasi's Friendship

Trick or Treat: Courtier Meetups

Trick or Treat: Young Nadia's Pranks

Trick or Treat: Muriel's Splinters

[icarusredwings]

Remember. It's not illegal to be Trans.......YET.

Trans youth are one of the most subject homelessness around this time of year, including trans veterans who were abandoned by their country after serving.

Talk to your local politicians.

Sign petitions.

Spread cited and scientifically correct information only from trusted sources.

If you have extra food give it to those in need instead of the garbage.

Invite a trusted SAFE unhoused person to sleep in your garage or couch these holidays.

Please do not out any of your friends, family or even strangers without their permission.

If you have a trans family member or friend please check up on their mental health.

Please protect our past, present, and future trans youth.

"To protect the kids" Please remember that ebery trans person was once a kid themselves.

Do not be shocked if your trans family members/ friends suddenly don't want to speak to you anymore if you vote to harm them.

These are scary and unknown times for us all, be kind, be careful, you are loved.

Donate to your local homeless shelter!!!

Here's a quick list of things to donate to those in need esspecially if they are unhoused for the winter:

Non perishables

Can opener

New and gently used men and women’s clothing

Brand new in package underwear, bras and socks

Blankets

Sleeping bags

Tents

Backpacks, drawstring bags and reusable grocery bags

Travel bags and luggage

Bikes, bike locks and brand new helmets

Winter coats

Waterproof gloves, scarves and brand new winter hats

Brand new hygiene items

New hairbrushes, hair ties and combs

Feminine hygiene products

Flashlights

Umbrellas and rain ponchos

Sunscreen and bug spray

Reusable water bottles

Things to donate to your local animal shelter because they're homeless and in need, too (as someone whos worked rescue for a decade)

Canned or soft dog or cat food

Hard bag of dog or cat food (reminder that some places won't take open bags, give it away on facebook or to a friend, DO NOT trash it unless you have too)

Larger bath towels and beach towels are great. Please no face cloths or hand towels. (Dogs eat/ shred them)

Large blankets & unstuffed bedding.

Large crates, collars, leashes, or any other dog/cat related items in good useable condition.

Pet medication that you no longer need (not expired)

ASK!!! Ask your local shelter what they need!!!

We love durable toys like kongs and nylabones, as well as medium/large interactive toys, it makes the dogs stays in the chain link cells much more enjoyable :)

If you're feeling fancy? FOSTER! A home for a week is better then nothing.

[a-twistedheartslonging]

How exactly does clothing work for the monster guys in your inhuman AU? Is there anything like specific means of dressing or accessorizing? For centaurs, nagas, driders, harpies, etc. especially. Clothing and accessories would have to be tailored around the parts of their bodies that are inhuman.

Ah, I've talked a bit about this in another post's reblogs.

@fidenciothecryptidgent said-

"My personal theories would be that the majority of day to day clothing is fairly loose with straps to help adjust to go over tails or wings or spines and plenty of clothes tend to have backless versions or even what's basically a removable back but maybe fashionably hidden (maybe buttoned down or kept tucked etc). Wide bottom pants might be favored depending on how clawed everyone is in the non human au (firmly believe Lion claws on feet will shred up any pants that are tighter than regular fit or boot cut)

I always imagined the equivalent of low back pants with ribbons/ties to go over tails as the standard for day to day outfits for folks with tails

Backless stuff for the wingeds or those with back ridges and a not so small amount of tube top type of clothing for ease (depending on floof on shoulders and chest cause having hair etc stuffed under clothing is uncomfortable) or just sleeveless shirts with wide arms for some since there's probably plenty with ridges, feathers or spines or even wings on their arms and if you need something to keep your arms warm then you'd get the appropriate thing.

Fancier stuff is gonna have to be fitted and tailered

But that's just personal opinions and theories lol"

Which makes a lot of sense. Now as for something like a drider or a centaur, it will only be the human part covered. Something like bottoms would be too much effort to make and wear aside from something to just keep their junk covered.

Also, for things like shoes he once again added-

"The world is likely fairly catered to getting battered from foot traffic and having to tough out strong nonhumans. I imagine depending on the feet such as hooves they'd probably wear something like large booties (think those giant dog shoes etc) but with good sturdy layers. Sturdy rubber sole, stiff middle layer to help with support so that the rubber sole isn't worn down too quickly while added support plus a cushiony layer on the inside for comfort and to make sure the middle layer isn't crunched on from the weight.

I wonder if due to the difficulty of trying to cater to so many different body types there would be a greater variety of accessories but for functionality. Like spray on rubber for shoes if you need better traction (similar to spray on waterproofing you see in hardware stores and outdoors supply stores), ways to add straps (basically broad straps/sashes that can kinda button/pin to stuff if the clothes don't quite fit or have enough strap etc). Basically just way more ways to help things fit."

So yeah, the custom clothing business would be making big bucks since there would be a lot of different body types needing clothes.

[blackseafoam]

Whumptober day 04. hallucinations l Hypnosis l sensory deprivation l "you're still alive in my head"

WC: 805

Warnings: Mild injury, ocular migraine, mentioned animal death (natural causes)

Stuenn felt the flicking twigs of the underbrush grabbing at his waxed anorak and woolen mittens as he trudged ahead. The waterproof clothing now merely decorative, having sweated through all of his underlayers. The musher squinted at the path ahead of him.

It's getting worse. Stuenn had experienced ocular migraines before, but never this bad, and the timing could not have been worse.

He had no way to know how long it had been since he lost his dog team, but the sun had just begun to set the last time he'd seen their furry hides disappear down the trail. He was far out on the Taiga, exploring a new trapping route. Sure, his people knew where he was, but it was still several days journey back home.

The clear sky was his only saving grace, with the canopy of bright moonlight and stars to orient by, Stuenn could see his path. He followed the pawprints and runner tracks in the snow by the cool light. The panic subsided for a while, and Stuenn jogged in the snow for hours after his runaway team. Hoping to find them tangled beyond the ability to keep running, or the sled snagged on a tree.

The unfortunately familiar gray haze began in the bottom of the field of view in his left eye. No no, not now. Stuenn futilely rubbed at his eye over and over again as he kept jogging through the woods. It was a matter of minutes before he had no vision in his left eye, and the haze was encroaching on his right, but he couldn't stop. The lack of eyesight was dangerous, but the cold was deadly. The damp layers under his jacket and pants would make quick work of his body heat if he stopped moving.

While using his other senses to navigate as best he could, he found himself in some bushes, which were rare in the taiga (except near rivers). At this point he was guessing where to go. The panic had clouded his judgement thicker than the blank haze, which now reduced his vision to a wide pinhole.

He stepped out into nothingness.

The musher's chest constricted as his inner ear told him he was falling, fast. He reached out by instinct, grabbing thin branches that snapped instantly. Something did catch him though, his mukluk held fast between two tree roots as his body pivoted over the edge. Stuenn groaned in pain as his ankle held his body weight at an unnatural angle. Grabbing at his knife, he tried swiping at the roots with the sharp instrument. He missed. Missed again, and again. He swiped so violently that his body began to rock back and fourth as he did so.

The boot slipped off.

Stuenn felt his left side hit something on the way down, scraping his face, but slowing his descent as he then rolled down a rocky canyon wall and onto the snowbank below.

So the trapper found himself. Face down in the snow, with only one boot, still gripping his survival knife.

A voice sounded, on the edge of his auditory periphery. It spoke a lilting incomprehensible sentence.

Sluggishly lifting his head, Stuenn attempted to scan his surroundings. Breath quickening in instant panic as he was suddenly reminded that he was almost completely blinded, save for a hole no bigger than the palm of his hand at the end of an outstretched arm. He propped himself up painfully, noticing his blood in the snow as he looked down.

He heard something else. Panting. The panting of a dog team going by, the sliding of runners on a nicely packed trail. Raising his gaze again, he caught sight of a pale dog standing before him.

Vikki.

His first dog, the first sled dog he could call all his own. The dog that had lived to a healthy 17 years old. The dog that had been in his life longer than not. She stood with her head low, glowering down at him.

"You're going the wrong way, dumbass."

The voice glided by on a wind rather than coming from Vikki.

"Am I dead?" Stuenn huffed, then had to gasp for air after the effort of speaking, holding his head at an awkward angle to see his long lost companion.

"No. Get up you limp herring, we've got work to do."

"I lost my boot."

"Excuses. I have no boots, you don't see me whining about it." Vik began to turn away and walk into the darkness.

"I can't see, slow down." Stuenn struggled to his feet. Once his one booted, and one merely socked feet were underneath him he staggered forward.

His knife laid in the snow behind, forgotten. The loyal tool would have shed a tear if it had feelings.

[blueiscoool]

Lost and Found: Bottle Hunter Digs Extraordinary Farmland Treasures

Tom Askjem is a time traveler. Every May to November, he disappears into the bowels of the earth, descends to depths of 13’-plus, and returns to the surface with treasure—bottles and glassware from farming’s past.

After 1,800 pits and hundreds of thousands of relics, Askjem is equal parts archeologist, thrill seeker, and mole. Muscle on dirt, the North Dakota farm boy has turned an addiction into a career, multiple books, and a captivating YouTube channel with millions of views. However, Askjem seeks more than glass.

“I’m digging for adventure, history, and love,” he says. The past is in these holes and there are countless numbers of them across farmland.”

Time to hunt with a master.

The Infection

On the flats of extreme eastern North Dakota’s Traill County, Askjem, 32, prepares for a dig trip. “No mountains and no hills in the Red River Valley,” he describes. “You can see your dog run away for days. The land is mostly featureless, other than a few big cottonwoods and shelter belts where farms used to be.”

A mop of blonde hair sits atop a 6’-tall, lanky frame as Askjem saddles his pony—a Honda Civic. At the current mileage rate, the Civic will be junkyard fodder before it has a scratch: 60,000 backroad miles added to the odometer in the past six months.

Askjem piles layers of gear into the trunk, including three of each tool for insurance: shovels, pronged garden forks, trampoline pads, probe rods, buckets, plastic scoopers, trowels, tents, sleeping bags, blankets, pillows, air mattresses, clothes, and waterproof, Redwing leather work boots.

“It never gets old,” he says, wearing a wide grin. “I caught the infection when I was a kid.”

Digging Bodies

Pushed from the Grand Forks area by the historic Red River flood of 1997, Askjem moved to a farm outside Buxton at six years young. The main property was an 1878 homestead—a progression from sod house to log cabin to the present standing 1898 farmhouse decked in Victorian-era woodwork and hardware.

Surrounded by history, including the skeletons of old wagons and rusting machinery, Askjem explored a 5-acre patch of woods on the property, and chanced on a garbage dump: pop bottles and trash.

Askjem dug.

“I went deep and found stuff going back to 1898. When you’re a kid living in the country, there’s no going down the street and there’s no hanging with friends to play video games—you make your own adventure. I started hitting up all the farmers I could find for leads.”

Behind the wheel of a rattling go-cart, Askjem sought Buxton old-timers and collected tips on abandoned houses. “They all helped me,” he says. “Nobody cared where I hunted because I was just a little kid exploring for all the right reasons.”

“I’ve still got an elementary school journal with an assignment describing my weekend,” he adds. “I wrote, ‘Me and Mom dug up old bodies.’ The teacher marked my paper out of concern,” Askjem describes, with an easy, deep chuckle. “I meant to spell bottles, not bodies. But it shows I was truly hooked.”

Indeed. Wonderfully hooked.

Soft Landing

Why are bottles buried under farmland and old house sites?

Prior to plastic and synthetics, glassware held everything: medicine, hygiene products, alcohol, soda, and beyond. Glass was it.

Additionally, prior to waste disposal services, homeowners discarded trash on-site—in back yard outhouses, trash depressions, burn pits, and wells or cisterns. In short time, the various ground receptacle spots were filled and forgotten.

“Let’s say, for example, a family moved in around 1880,” Askjem explains. “That site likely has two or three outhouse locations prior to World War l. The outhouse spots filled up at a rate according to family size. I dug one farmhouse site that had six outhouses in a 10-year span. Folks went into the outhouses and threw away bottles: medicine, opiates, beer, whiskey. It was convenient and private, and had a soft landing, and got covered quickly. Even now, the bottles often are still preserved.”

“Generally, these houses also had a burn pit and/or dump pit. In the early days, they burned all trash in the stove for heat. Also, homestead bucket wells were filled up with trash and bottles once they were replaced by pump wells. Cisterns also were eventually filled up, but most of those are associated with houses in town.”

And the sites remain, he emphasizes, hiding intact relics beyond the reach of farm machinery or tillage equipment.

X Marks the Spot

Location. Location. Location. Other than a tip or invitation, how does Askjem find dig sites?

X marks the spot, at least in the county courthouse or public library. He spends winters poring over early property transaction documents. “I look at lot sales. If several lots sold for $100 each in 1880, but one sold for $1,000 in 1885, the price climb tells the story and likely represents a building location.”

“I also read old newspaper archives, looking for hotel or business advertisements,” Askjem continues. “Then I can look up the proprietor’s name and keep tightening the scope, narrowing down the exact building location.”

“Every single house is different, but generally, in the countryside, outhouses were 30 paces out the back door. In the city, where most lots were 140’ long, outhouses could be as close as 5-10 paces.”

Confident of a site’s potential, Askjem first asks for permission to dig from the landowner. “Property owners are always so kind to me and I don’t hide anything I find. They’re curious about what is in the ground, just like anybody else.”

Second, he grids out the site. “I put down markers 2 paces apart, maybe 20 paces long. I push probe rods into ground and feel for compaction differences. Depending on the location, I’ll call in and have utility lines marked out for power and gas.”

Decked in Levi’s and a tank-top, it’s time to tunnel.

Claustrophobic Comfort

Shovel in hand, Askjem descends into a layer cake of dirt: black topsoil to brown-colored clay to telltale ash to a use layer containing treasure.

“Generally, I go deep to find old items in quantity. The earliest bottles were used to the last drop by farmers and thrown out empty. Therefore, when they froze in brutal Dakota winters, the glass didn’t break from liquid expansion.”

As Askjem extracts glass vessels from the dirt and grime, his encyclopedic knowledge registers with each find. He recognizes the type, manufacturer, and age. Ink bottles, hygiene bottles, medicine bottles, beer bottles, soda bottles—and far more spill from the holes.

“I find patented medicine bottles across the country, but my favorite are soda bottles because they are unique to their locale and have character. The old soda bottles are usually marked with the bottler and town name because they were returnable.”

The outhouse pits are typically 6’-deep at home sites, with an average size of 6’-by-4’-by-3’. “I’ve dug ghost towns, dug saloons, train depots, and pool halls that were 12’ long, 4’ wide, and 8’ deep. I remember a hotel pit that was 20’-by-20’ and 8’ deep. There was a military fort with pits behind the barracks that was 12’ long, 4’ wide, and 13.5’ deep: That was a week’s worth of digging.”

Askjem’s subterranean realm provides no comfort to the claustrophobic. At 8’-9’, he braces the holes with woodwork. “I’m in a solid clay base that doesn’t cave, but I have a healthy respect for the ground’s limitation. Sometimes, it looks like I’m digging a rabbit hole.”

Preserved in nature’s freezer, the artifacts unearthed by Askjem often are in phenomenal condition.

“Pieces of newspaper can still be read; bottle labels are legible; white lime used in decomposition is visible; and undigested seeds are everywhere. Even 120-year-old human waste sometimes is perfectly preserved and still smells like hell. I wear a hydrogen sulfide respirator in those cases.”

“It’s all there; almost like it was dropped yesterday.”

Ghosts in the Ground

In 2022, Askjem began chronicling his digs via a YouTube channel, Below the Plains, and soon captured millions of views. At two posts per week, he gins footage at a steady rate to feed the algorithm, a tough task considering the ground in his geography is frozen from mid-November to mid-May.

Additionally, Askjem has written two in-depth books (Nebraska Soda Bottles 1865-1930 and A History of North Dakota Bottling Operations 1879-1930) and has more on the way. “I put the bottle prices in the books because they can sell for a whole lot and I always tell the landowners. Listing prices draw criticism, but that’s important to me because it helps preserve the item, and preservation of history is what drives me.”

Covered in dust or mud at the end of each day in digging season, Askjem is highly respectful of what he finds—almost reverent after 1,800 digs. “I appreciate everything I uncover because it represents a part of someone’s daily life and existence. There’s nothing wrong with coveting bottles, but I’m really in those holes for the moment of discovery.”

Even when not digging, Askjem is on the move, surfing on the coasts or river diving for lost cargo. In the decades to come, will he continue burrowing into the past? “Twenty years from now, I hope I’m still digging and there’s nothing I’d rather be doing right now.”

“There’s not an infinite amount of lost bottle sites, but there’s certainly an incredibly high number,” he continues. “There were 300,000 homestead farms in North Dakota with a minimum of one well, one outhouse, and one trash dump. And that doesn’t include towns where most of the population lived. There are millions of these sites in North Dakota and far more in other states.”

Respect to a freewheeling hunter like no other. Bottles draw the eye, but ghosts draw the heart: “The moment never gets old when you uncover a bottle and find that history,” Askjem adds. “Never.”

By CHRIS BENNETT.

[bump1nthen1ght]

Campus Romance

Pairing: Art Teacher!Sex Demon x Writer!Gender Neutral!Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1786 words

Summary: You stumble into an art lecture while around your new college campus. Luckily, the hot professor doesn’t seem to mind

Request: UH BELZ HELLOOO???? You can’t give this gay anon a He/They art professor sex demon and not expect them to request a fic??

Anyways- can I humbly request a meet cute fic of Belz with a reader (GN or Male either or) who’s a writer? Maybe they meet on the college campus Belz works at or they meet over the phone cause of Belz’s night job, whatever floats your boat I just want flirty demon pls (/lh)

A/N: For those who haven’t read it, heres the piece where I introduced Belz!

What a perfect first day. No rain coat, no umbrella, an open campus and a downpour of rain. You hold your (hopefully) waterproof binder over your head as you race across a crosswalk, just avoiding getting splashed by a campus gardener.

This is what I get for waking up early. This is a sign from god.

You had meant to peruse around the college today, taking a note of the building you’d soon be teaching out of and the general layout. But the rain has turned everything into a blurry mess and you end up ducking into the nearby arts building. Your future office is technically only one over, but you’d rather not spend that extra 5 minutes and have your jeans get soaked through.

After shaking off like a dog, you begin wandering down the halls trying to find a bathroom, at least to see how much of a mess you must look like. The building is heated, thank gods, but only few of the classrooms are occupied. You’d guess most people decided to ditch or cancel their 8 AMS after seeing the weather outside.

You’re shrugging off your damp sweater when you see a propped open door, a vivacious voice and the sweet smell of incense luring you in. At first you intend only to peek, maybe ask where the nearest restroom is, but what you had expected to be a dull lecture room ended being much more interesting.

Numerous paint cases and student exhibitions line the wall, the tables well loved with paint splatter and pencil scratches. In the center of the room is a giant marble statue of a man in a rather artful pose, surrounded by multiple students and their easels. They all sit hunched over, charcoal smudged on their fingers as they sketch the form in front of them. But what really catches your eye is the lecturer, standing right next to the subject.

“Now, I want you pay special attention to the movement lines of this piece.” They say, running their fingers down the statues upturned arm. Long, black nails trail down the side of the figure, tracing the defined side and the hip bones. “Notice the flow of the Contrapposto stance, how it positions his limbs around the slight twist in his torso. If you want to come and see up close, you may.” The lecturer smirks, “Starting next week we’ll have live models, so this will be the only subject you can get flirty with.” The lecturer slaps the statue’s butt, a general murmur of laughter coming from the students.

The lecturer steps off the stand and brushes back their shaggy hair. Their billowy shirt exposes a lean clavicle and several necklaces. Their blue skin is complimented by the dark red of their boho pants, only adding to their relaxed air. Their gaze wanders around the classroom, observing their students before landing on you, the wet stranger lurking in the corner. You give a wave, hoping it doesn’t look too awkward.

Their eyes go wide at your soaking wet form, briskly walking over. You’re able to catch the small name tag pinned in their shirt.

Belz (He/They)

“Howdy.” They mock salute, eyes wandering down your wet clothes. “My goodness, you’re drenched! Here-” They reach over, grabbing a smock from a nearby hanger, “It’s not much but hopefully it should warm you up some.” Before you can protest they’ve thrown it across your chest, ducking behind you and grabbing onto the laces. You feel the faint brush of their claws as Belz quickly ties up the back, cinching it tight to your waist with a few precise movements. The fabric itself may not be particularly cozy, but you feel a warmth covering your body nonetheless.

“There,” Belz mutters, rubbing some imaginary dust off your shoulder. “And look at that, it fits perfectly.” He mutters, his chuckle at his own little joke just as inviting as the classroom itself. “Now, what can I do for you, stranger?”

“Oh, nothing! I actually was just escaping from the rain when I saw the door open. I guess I just got…drawn in?” You straighten out the front of the smock, realizing now how random this encounter is. “Just thought I’d observe. I hope I’m not intruding.”

“It’s no problem at all, my lessons are for all, as is art itself.” Belz brushes a stray hair back before sticking out their hand. “I’m Belz.”

“____.” You shake their hand, “I-I’m actually a new literature professor, I was supposed to be touring the campus today, but, well….” You gesture outside, an ironic crack of thunder echoing as you do. But Belz isn’t dissuaded by the storm, a big smirk coming across their lips.

“Well, I’m happy to be your welcoming party, Professor ____.” Belz wraps their other palm around the outside of your fist, enfolding your hand in theirs. Their warm palms feel refreshing against your icy skin. “Now, do you like muffins?”

“Oh, yeah, I guess so-”

“Perfect!” Belz keeps your hand in his as he leads you to his desk, a big tray of different muffins sitting right by his laptop.“My mom always said the cure to bad weather is good food, so you may have the pick of the lot. Though my students have probably pilfered the best ones. Can’t let your mind work on an empty stomach, after all.”

Belz sits down in their chair, giving it a little spin before grabbing a chocolate muffin from the basket.

“Thank you! These look delicious.” You grab a banana-nut muffin, shocked by how warm it still was, like it just came out of the pan.

“I get them every morning from that bakery right near campus. It’s to die for, you have to check it out.” Belz takes a big chomp out of their muffin, immediately swooning at the flavor. Their noises are almost..erotic.

You take a bite of your muffin, trying not to think about that. But Belz is right, these muffins are delicious, you can almost forget about your waterlogged jeans.

“So, you’re a banana nut fan, huh? Underrated flavor in my opinion.”

“Agreed. But I think my favorite is blueberry.”

“Hmm, good to know.” Belz laughs, tapping their cheek as their eyes elevator up and down. You take another bite of your muffin, hoping he can’t see your cheeks flush. Instead you look around their desk, multiple knick-knacks and smaller art pieces scattered all around. Right near their laptop is a framed picture, one of those cheesy ones with a photoshop caption from the early 2000’s, of two rats. The caption reads “Benny and Jet <3”

“Are those your pet rats?”

Belz gasps, excitedly nodsing before holding the photo proudly up to his face.

“Yes, these are my babies, the loves of my life, my platonic soulmates. I would’ve brought them to class today, if not for the weather.”

“They’re really cute.” You point towards Benny, who is almost all white except for the brown spot on his hind. “I had a rat that looked like Benny when I was a kid. She was an absolute sweetheart, though my friend would freak out whenever they saw her.”

Belz tuts, “I don’t trust people who disrespect rats. It’s my ultimate judge of character.”

“Well, one of those friends did throw a pudding cup at me a year later, so I’d say it’s pretty accurate.”

You both laugh, Belz throwing his head back. He’s got a pleasant laugh, resonant like a bass guitar. His countenance is infectiously friendly and when he smiles your way, you can't help but feel a little more giddy.

“Well, good to know you have great taste in food and in pets, Professor. Hopefully that good taste rings true elsewhere, hmm?” Belz leans on their palm, giving you another wink.

You find yourself stuttering, rubbing the back of your head as you try to come up with a funny retort, but then-

“Professor? Could I ask for some advice on something?”

Belz stands up with a flourish, their billowing clothes making the motion seem extra elegant. “Well, it seems my people need me.”

“Of course, I’ll let you get back to work.”

Belz places a hand on your shoulder, that flirtatious smile making the contact feel even more electrifying. “Feel free to stay as long as you like, I have a kettle if you’d like some tea to warm you up.”

“Thanks again, but I probably should go and find my office. Be brave and face the rain.”

Belz smile widens, their eyes wandering down before locking you in with a sultry gaze. “Well, feel free to holler if you need anything. And you can stop by my class anytime.”

Belz begins ti walk away, but keeps their hand lingering on your shoulder. Their fingers glide across the back of your shirt, only loosing contact only when they’ve walked too far away.

Goosebumps rise to your skin, and you know it’s not from the wet clothes.

“Who knows, maybe you could be the model next time.” With another sultry wink, they walk away and to their student, immediately shifting into teacher mode as they look over the sketch.

You scurry out the door with a weak goodbye, hoping the cold rain will help your burning blush.

—-

Its your first official day of teaching and you're leaving the lecture hall with a pep in your step. Your students are much more engaged than you thought they would be for a morning class and you have a nice hour break before office hours. A warm lunch waits for you in your mini fridge, though you’re slightly regretting not grabbing those cookies you had back home; You were really craving some sweets.

You’re fiddling with the keys to your office door when you notice a small bag sitting right outside. It might have been mistaken for garbage, if not for the sticky note with your name and a heart stuck to the outside. You pick it up, nudging open the door with your hip as you walk inside, opening the bag with two fingers.

The first thing you see is paper wrapping, the thin kind all bakeries use, and then you the sweetest, most delectable looking blueberry muffin. It’s still warm to the touch, with a tasteful amount of sugar crystals on the top.

You place the muffin down on your desk, noticing the note underneath it. You unfold and read it as you sit down in your office chair.

You’re favorite, hope you’re having a great first day <3

-Belz

The smile that creeps up on you is a giddy one, quickly tesring open ghe muffin and taking a large bit.

Damn, this is delicious.

[viavermont]

Wednesday Addams.

Mentions of death & brief violence.

Subject One:

Name and surname: Wednesday Friday Addams

Sex: Female

D.O.B: 10th October, 1965

Status: Alive

D.O.D: N/A

Height: 5'1"

MBTI Type: INTJ

Religious Views: N/A

Character Overview:

Wednesday Addams is a twenty-two year old misanthrope. To the wilting population, she does not exist and wants to keep it that way. If you ever see her, it's always a glimpse and you probably think you're seeing something paranormal.

She set up camp in a WWI bunker as soon as she was aware of the outbreak. Being the somewhat paranoid but rational person she is, Wednesday already had supplies in the bunker. Now she only ever leaves if she deems it necessary (mainly when she's feeling lightheaded from the lack of air underground).

Wednesday's visions are one of the main catalysts for her want to be alone. They often fuel her paranoia and make her uneasy, especially since a lot of them have to do with death. She tends to avoid touching unfamiliar things and entering buildings unless she needs to. It seems like her visions are only becoming more uncontrollable and intense with age.

Three months post-apocalypse, Wednesday found a mauled dog surrounded by it's litter, of which only one survived. Wednesday took it upon herself to shelter the puppy and train it. Fourteen months post-apocalypse and the puppy, named Shelly, is well trained.

Wednesday has an almost ridiculous standard for the upkeep of her appearance in an apocalypse. She rebraids her hair everyday, styling the ends to look like nooses. Her bangs are a little too long ever since she failed at cutting them with blunt kitchen scissors and a knife.

Unlike the majority of uninfected people, Wednesday's face is untouched. She hasn't come across anything that could get close enough to harm her. The only scar she has is somewhere on her scalp and she got that from bashing her head on a rock during a vision.

Her skin is a concerning type of pale though, and her freckles are no longer as visible as they used to be. Due to being in the bunker so often, Wednesday lacks a lot of Vitamin D.

Clothing wise, Wednesday's closet is limited and monochrome. She has two pairs of pants, two button ups, two t-shirts, two sweaters, and a waterproof jacket. She also has a scarf and gloves that her Mother knitted for her pre-apocalypse.

Being only 5'1", Wednesday has a rotation of three pairs of boots that add at least 2 and a half inches to her height.

Relationships:

Shelly ─ named after Mary Shelly, Shelly is a mostly trained hunting dog. She's the main reason Wednesday actually leaves the bunker and is helpful when it comes to hunting. Even though Wednesday won't admit it, Shelly is keeping her sane and she cherishes her dog.

Tyler Galpin ─ Wednesday has crossed paths with Tyler a few times. Their first interaction was her saving him from being attacked by a werewolf in the woods. She shot the wolf twice and it ran off. Tyler gave Wednesday a few extra bullets in return for saving his life. They're not friends but he's friendly enough.

Enid Sinclair ─ The werewolf that Wednesday shot was Enid. They first properly met during a hunting session with Shelly. Enid was so startled by seeing someone that deep in the woods she almost threw an axe at Wednesday. As she does, Enid asks Ajax if they should ask if she would join their group; Wednesday says no. But much to her misfortune, Enid insisted on giving Wednesday a spare walkie talkie just in case. Now Wednesday cannot seem to shake Enid or her annoying group of friends.

Larissa Weems ─ was almost like a mentor to Wednesday during the early stages of the outbreak. Larissa found Wednesday in the woods after she had hit her head on a rock during a vision. Four months post-apocalypse, a wound of Larissa's got infected and she got sick. She asked Wednesday to kill her because she didn't want to go slowly.

Kills:

Unknown number of Humors and animals, various ways.

Rowan Laslow, shot in the back of the head with a crossbow.

Male Farmer, cut his breaks.

Unnamed Boy, sliced throat.

Noble Walker, was hit by the truck with cut breaks.

Larissa Weems, sliced throat.

Laural Gates, shot in the head.

Wednesday has complicated relationships with people and is very stuck in her misanthropic ways, but she and Enid do have somewhat of a romantic relationship.

If you have questions or want me to expand on anything, my asks are open.

[totoshappylife]

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[vegaspetodorremoval]

Say Goodbye To Stains: Tips For Removing Dog Pee From Your Mattress

There's nothing quite as disheartening as discovering that your beloved furry friend has left an unwelcome surprise on your mattress. Dog pee stains can be a real hassle, but fear not! With the right tips and tricks, you can say goodbye to stains for good. In this guide, we'll walk you through everything you need How To Remove Dog Pee From A Mattress  so you can rest easily. Let's dive in!

Understanding Why Dogs Pee on Beds

Dogs may pee on beds for various reasons, from medical to behavioral problems. It could be a sign of anxiety or stress, significantly if their environment has changed recently. Sometimes, dogs mark their territory by urinating on things that carry their scent, like your mattress.

Sometimes, a dog might have a medical condition, such as a urinary tract infection or diabetes, that causes it to urinate indoors. Age-related issues can also lead to accidents on the bed. Understanding why your dog is peeing on the bed is crucial in addressing the root cause and preventing future incidents.

Observing your dog's behavior and consulting with a veterinarian if you suspect any underlying health issues is essential. By identifying the reason behind this behavior, you can take proactive steps to resolve it and keep your mattress clean and fresh.

Quick Tips for Cleaning Up Fresh Urine Stains

Imagine waking up to find your furry friend has left you a not-so-pleasant surprise on your mattress. It happens, and it's essential to act fast! The key to dealing with fresh urine stains is speed. The longer the mess sits, the harder it will be to remove.

Start by blotting up as much urine as possible using paper towels or a clean cloth. Avoid rubbing the stain, which can spread it further into the mattress fibers. Once you've soaked up what you can, mix a solution of equal parts water and white vinegar in a spray bottle.

Spritz the affected area generously with the vinegar solution and let it sit for a few minutes before gently blotting again. Then, sprinkle baking soda over the stain to help absorb any remaining odor. Let it sit for at least 30 minutes before vacuuming it up.

These quick tips can help tackle fresh urine stains effectively before they have a chance to set in and become more challenging to remove later on.

Effective Methods for Removing Old or Set-In Stains

Dealing with old or set-in dog pee stains on your mattress can be a real headache. These stubborn stains leave an unpleasant odor and pose a challenge to remove altogether. However, fret not, as there are effective methods you can try to tackle this issue.

Creating a cleaning solution using equal water and white vinegar is one method. Gently blot the stained area with this solution using a clean cloth, allowing it to sit for some time before rinsing with water.

Another approach is to sprinkle baking soda over the stain and then mix hydrogen peroxide with dish soap. Let the solution sit for a while before gently scrubbing away the residue.

Consider using enzymatic cleaners specifically designed to break down pet urine molecules effectively for tougher stains. Follow the instructions provided by the product for the best results in removing those pesky old stains from your mattress.

Preventing Future Accidents and Protecting Your Mattress

Consider using a waterproof mattress protector to prevent future accidents and protect your mattress. These handy covers are a barrier against spills or accidents, making cleanup much more accessible. Additionally, regularly wash your bedding to maintain a fresh and clean sleeping environment.

Training your dog is crucial in preventing future accidents on your bed. Consistent potty training and positive reinforcement can help reduce the likelihood of them peeing on the mattress. Providing regular bathroom breaks for your furry friend can also minimize accidents indoors.

If you notice any signs of anxiety or health issues in your dog that may be causing bed-wetting incidents, consult with a veterinarian for guidance on how to effectively address these concerns. Remember, patience and consistency are crucial to preventing accidents and protecting your mattress from unwanted stains caused by dog pee.

Alternative Solutions and Products for Tough Stains

When it comes to dealing with tough dog pee stains on your mattress, various alternative solutions and products can be effective. Enzymatic cleaners designed specifically for pet urine removal can work wonders in breaking down the stain's odor-causing components. You can also use a mixture of hydrogen peroxide and baking soda to create a powerful cleaning paste.

For persistent or stubborn stains, steam cleaning your mattress may provide a deeper clean and help eliminate any lingering odors. Additionally, investing in a waterproof mattress protector can prevent future accidents and keep your mattress safe from potential damage.

By following these tips and utilizing the right products, you can say goodbye to dog pee stains on your mattress for good. Remember, patience and persistence are key when tackling this common pet-related issue. With the proper approach, you can keep your mattress fresh and clean while enjoying quality time with your furry companion.

[mango-pup]

Mango’s cheat sheet for camping with dogs

@spitzonthefritz asked for tips, so here goes.

Windbreak for visual barrier - I’m quite embarrassed I didn’t think of this sooner, but adding it last year made so much difference. I angle my van and the windbreak so that Mango can chill in her crate and not see anyone walking past. I have this one, took some practise to be able to put up alone, but no gap along the bottom and sturdy in Scottish winds https://www.decathlon.co.uk/p/camping-windbreak-4-x-1-45-metres-6-person/_/R-p-145188?mc=8357445

Calming food toys - I use likimat and honey pot/toppl for Mango’s wet food. She can have them in her crate, and are calming, rather than ‘run around chase the food’

Tie out (but only for littles!!) - I 100% would not trust this to hold Mango, but it works for Rhu. It would also stress Mango out, but if you have a dog that likes to watch, it’s brilliant. But ONLY FOR LITTLES: https://www.zooplus.co.uk/shop/dogs/dog_collars_dog_leads/long_leads_safety/long_leads/14372

Travel/untippable water bowls - Mango has one in her crate, and Rhu has one outside. Otherwise water goes everywhere: https://www.zooplus.co.uk/shop/dogs/dog_bowls_feeders/travel_dog_bowl/623718

Go out early/late, relax in the middle of the day - Campsites are busy at breakfast and dinner time, but pretty empty during the day. We tend to get up and go straight out, rather than trying to have a relaxing breakfast when everyone is being super exciting. Have a long quiet lunch, then out again when everyone gets back about 3.

Find other places to chill - I spend a lot of time in Forestry Commission car parks. They are busy at the exact opposite time to campsites, so I often pack up my breakfast, eat there before we go for a walk, or walk and then eat my dinner there before heading back. They normally have picnic tables, so even if you don’t actually use them you’re not *that* out of place.

“Dogs on campsite” sign - I actually have to give @konmari-dogs credit for this, but I have a little yellow “Wet Floor” sign, but instead of “wet floor” it says “Dogs on campsite”. I think I ordered both the plastic A-frame and the sticker off a health and safety site? They had the option to customise the sticker. I don’t know how much difference it makes, but it might.

Not really do related but use tubs instead of bags to store stuff - I have two stackable plastic tubs that have my clothes in and my food/cooking eating stuff in and they are so easy, I can just pull them out of the van, dump them down wherever, they double as a table when needed, are waterproof so they can stay out if needed.

There are probably more, but that’s what I remember right now.

[strangerthingsstuff4]

A Story of Another Us- Chapter Two

Summary- Dahlia was no longer in the business of hurting her own feelings but when spending break from University on her best friends family ranch she finds more than just some veterinary experience.

Warnings- Swearing

The leather black suitcase hit the wet pebbled floor with a thud, Dahlia was just thankful that she hadn’t pulled the rest of the boot’s contents out with it. The rain had stopped while she had a short few hours sleep, it was still too cold for the thin gym leggings she had adorned on her journey. It took all her strength to try and pick up the suitcase with both hands, she just about managed to get it a few centimeters off the floor but it was enough for her to get it to the doors that led into the kitchen.

‘Oh here’ Haelena’s nephew Jace jumped out of his seat to help her.

Dahlia was not the only house guest they were having this break, Haelena had mentioned that she had a half sister from her father, she had moved off the farm and bought her own land just after Viserys’ passing. It was her sister’s two eldest boys that were joining her in vacationing with the Targaryen family, Jace and Luke were roughly the same age as Helaena and her siblings if not a few years younger, as were their girlfriends Baela and Rhaena who had joined them on their visit.

‘Thanks’ Dahlia breathed, letting Jace take the case from her and watched him struggle with it a little.

‘Right go and put some warmer clothes on and then I’ll take you on a little tour!’ Haelena grinned giddily.

‘We could look for the dog too if you wanted’ Dahlia suggested as she opened her case searched through it for her fur lined leggings.

‘Maybe yeah, I think Aemond had already searched the farm, here you’re size five right?’ Haelena queried as she handed her a pair of dark green wellington boots.

Dahlia took the shoes and slid them on her feet after she had slipped the thick leggings over the gym leggings she had on. She also pulled her thick waterproof coat out of the case and threw it on. She followed Haelena out into the cold morning air, shoving her hands into her pockets to keep them warm.

‘These are the chickens, that’s the stables and the training yard, we have three palfreys and two Stallions at the moment. Aemond mainly cares for the horses but I’m sure he’d be happy to let you help and show you the ropes’ Haelena started to inform her as the two girls began down the small slope that led to the large section of land that lay behind the house.

‘These are the small trough beds we use for our crops; we can’t grow a lot but what we can grow saves us tons on shopping, these are mainly for like small fruits, cabbages and stuff, the greenhouse is for bigger things like artichokes and pumpkins and stuff’

‘I had no idea you guys were so self-sufficient, this is so cool Hel!... what’s that building?’ Dahlia asked referring to the old run-down building that sat at the very bottom of the garden.

‘Oh that was a cottage my sister used to live in, it’s been empty for a long time now but mum keeps speaking about having it renovated, come on… I think she’s planning on letting one of us move into it when we get a partner or something but for now it’s just full of old equipment’ She informed her best friend while she led her down the length of the land and through a small arch way in the tall thick hedges.

Dahlia made sure to shut the gate securely behind her before continuing over the grassy land and onto another dirt track. Haelena went on telling her about how many fields that had and what animals resided in them. They had cows, Heifers and Bulls both. They had Ewes, Rams and were hoping to start lambing for the first-time next season. Dahlia could have listened to her talk about the farm and the animals all day, she loved how Haelena’s face lit up when she could show off her vast knowledge of the farming life.

‘Oh there’s mum come and say hi’ The silver haired girl pointed across the country road to where a brunette stood on the other side of the field, two tall figures with matching shiny locks as that of her best friend.

They both plodded through the wet mud and through the fence that led onto more wet mud and grass. As they approached the group Dahlia caught the pale purple eyes of Haelena’s younger brother, his gaze burnt into her like fire in a way she didn’t much enjoy.

‘Hi, mum this is my friend Dahlia that I told you about, Dahl this is my mum’

‘It’s a pleasure to meet you Mrs Hightower’ Dahlia smiled, shaking the extended hand of the stunningly beautiful young woman.

‘And you sweetie, Haelena has spoken so highly of you, have you met my sons? My eldest Aegon and one of Haelena’s other brothers Aemond’ she introduced her to the two men who were both also stunning.

Dahlia smiled at both of them and mumbled a quiet ‘hello’, too scared of being received with another ice-cold comment from Aemond. The three of them had been stood next to what looked to be a young heifer, one that seemed to visibly be in discomfort. It’s belly was extremely swollen, her hind legs were regularly kicking at her stomach and stomping into the soft wet surface of the floor.

‘Right well we’ll have to get Criston out her to have a look at her… there goes another four hundred dragons’ Alicent sighed looking the animal over, her hands on her hips.

‘Mum, I told you to just sell them to Nyra, they’re more hassle than they’re worth’ Aemond huffed, a slight glint of distaste as he watched his brother pat the animals side like she was a pet.

‘Is it trapped wind? I know something that might help if you don’t mind me trying’ Dahlia asked nervously, noticing the defeat in Alicents face.

The woman looked at her unsure before nodding and waving for her to give it a go.

‘Erm does anyone have like a nail or knife? Something sharp?’

Aegon began rifling through the deep pockets on his fleece jacket, he pulled out long loose nail and handed it to her. She moved closer to the cow, avoiding her jolting legs and stroke her side soothingly. Finding a spot towards the back of the hard bloated stomach, Dahlia used all of her strength to pierce the thick layer of skin, the cow let out a long loud sound of relief when she removed the nail and the hot smelly air began to release from her stomach.

‘That should do it’ Dahlia huffed wafting the horrible smelling gas away from her face as she stepped back and the animal visibly relaxed.

‘Really? That simple?’ Alicent asked astounded.

‘It’s a trick I learnt from someone I studied under in the capital; vets don’t tell you about it because they can charge you hundreds on medication. Just need to keep an eye on her for the rest of the day and make sure she’s eating properly and that wound will heal itself in a few days as long as it’s been cleaned’.

‘Dahlia almost has her master’s degree in veterinary care for agricultural purposes’ Haelena bragged nudging her best friend.

‘Really?! Well you let me know as soon as you have that degree, I could use somebody like you working with us’ Alicent grins at the girl, admiring how the heifer had returned to business as usual, grazing at the grass.

Aemond had began to head off the field before the rest of them, Dahlia was unsure of whether she had heard him scoff or not before he walked away from the group. As the rest of them walked back towards the house, Aegon chirping down her ear some of the small hacks he knew and how he could teach them to her sometime, Dahlia couldn’t help but feel a bit uncomfortable. She had only had two interactions with Aemond yet both times he seemed to be inpatient with her. Had she done something wrong? Something to make her seem strange. Perhaps he just wasn’t keen on being around new people or perhaps he was just a complete dick, either way she had no intention of spending a lot of time around him.

It was heaven when Dahlia got to crawl onto the soft mattress later that night, her stomach full from the meal Haelena and Baela had cooked for everyone. Her limbs melted like butter underneath the thick warm blanket and her head sunk into the pillow like it was a cloud. She had decided on an oversized shirt as her pyjamas and shoved her long copper her on top of her head for a good night’s sleep. Her room was on the very top floor of the house, at the end of the landing. She had watched Aegon go into the room next to hers and she was sure Aemond had disappeared into the room opposite hers not long after. Dahlia must have fallen asleep in seconds, her body finally giving up the fight, because the next thing she knew she was rolling out of bed. Despite having less than fifteen hours sleep in the last two days, her body clock hadn’t gotten the memo. She had lay in bed refusing to get up for twenty minutes, hoping to fall back asleep but to no luck.

Usually she was up at 5am for an hour-long jog before beginning her day but not being able to navigate her surrounding area Dahlia decided it was safer to pass on it this morning. She had managed to sleep in a little but even at 5:45 the house seemed to still be asleep. Dahlia padded down the stairs in her fluffy socks and entered the kitchen, she flicked the switch on the kettle planning on a nice hot cup of coffee to start her day.

Dahlia stood against the counter waiting for the kettle to boil when she noticed the light glowing through the windows of the stable. She wasn’t the only one awake apparently, deciding whether or not to go and offer any help she settled for making breakfast for everyone. She was familiar with Haelena’s sleep routine so knew she would be appearing from her basement bedroom in the next 30 minutes, just enough time to make pancakes.

Finding everything she needed in the pantry, Dahlia set to work measuring, mixing and flipping until she had enough pancakes for at least five people, fresh fruit set out on the table along with syrups, sugar and fresh squeezed lemon juice. She was in the middle of whisking together another batch of mixture when a small whine and scratching noise caught her attention. Dahlia placed the bowl on the counter and opened the sliding glass doors of the kitchen.

‘Hello little one, you must be Vhagar’ Dahlia smiled down at the soggy ball of fluff, standing aside to let the poor girl inside.

Vhagar was a breed of sheepdog that was no longer bred commercially, an old breed originating in Valyria that was almost impossible to obtain. Dahlia watched the poor dog walk straight to her food bowl and sniff about, gulping down water. Unsure of where the dog food was kept, Dahlia began snooping around the cupboards, Vhagar following her every step, sticking her head in every cupboard and sniffing the contents.

‘Mind your head nosy hole’ Dahlia laughed, not hearing someone step through the door that she had left open.

‘Excuse me?’ Aemond questioned, making his presence known and making Dahlia jump out of her skin, hitting her head on the draw above her.

‘Gods…I was speaking to Vhagar’ she breathed calming herself down.

Vhagar ran around the table to Aemond’s feet, wiggling her tail with so much excitement her bum rocked from side to side.

‘Hey you, where have you been? I’ve been looking for you everywhere!’ Aemond cooed, kneeling down to pet her tatty damp fur.

Dahlia couldn’t help but smile watching the interaction between man and his best friend. How he let her stand against him, front paws on his shoulder licking his face affectionately. Dahlia returned to her cooking, pouring small circles of batter onto the hot baking pan.

‘I was trying to find her food, figured she was going to be hungry’ Dahlia mumbled to Aemond over her shoulder.

She was received with a ‘hmm’ and the sound of his feet walking to the pantry, followed by a bag rustling and biscuits hitting the metal bowl. Aemond gave a satisfied chuckle watching Vhagar scoff down her food and look to him for more.

‘I didn’t realise anyone else was up and out already, I’ve made pancakes for breakfast so help yourself there’s-‘

Dahlia turned around to inform him of all the condiments she had laid out but was met with the image of him retreating out of the room, plate of pancakes in one hand and another bowl of dog kibble In the other, Vhagar in tow. She stood astounded, no thank you or good morning or anything.

He was really starting to piss her off.