#does this even count as analysis? it feels wrong coming from me...

[arttsuka]

Usually, people tend to see the parallels between Jinx&Viktor and Vi&Jayce, nerds vs jocks in a way, I guess. There are more, sure, but I'm here to talk about Jinx&Jayce and Vi&Viktor instead.

(A little disclaimer, I haven't watched Arcane in 2 years more or less so sorry for any inaccuracies)

First things first, the obvious thing, their names.

J for Jinx and Jayce, Vi for Vi and Viktor.

For their appearance (at least in arcane), Jinx and Jayce have a more blue wardrobe and colors. Vi and Viktor have more red/pink instead.

All of them are stubborn but I think Jinx and Jayce are/were more optimistic than Vi and Victor who are more 'realists' (but can and will get stuck to certain ideas/beliefs and will sacrifice stuff to achieve their goals).

Jinx, due to her being younger and Jayce due to him being more 'sheltered' are more childish, easier to manipulate and rile up.

Jinx, mainly because of Silco and his influence in her life, didn't grow up (Powder to Jinx) 'in the undercity'. Sure, they were there, but it wasn't exactly like she was living on the streets with the other citizens, like Vi who we know had a social life (until she got thrown to prison for the ??? time). Viktor also was a direct 'product' of the undercuty. Jayce wasn't.

Jinx and Jayce both have memories from their childhoods that they keep 'close', thinking about them and it let them to change their whole personality, to shape it into something different. The bomb incident was the start of the Jinx persona, the Mage that saved Jayce and his mom were the reason he started to study and why he wanted to learn more about magic in the first place. Vi and Viktor are less likely to accept change, especially in people. Vi refuses to believe Jinx is no longer Powder, Viktor doesn't want to believe Jayce will put other things (fame, his reputation, other people) before him and their research.

Finally, Jinx and Jayce mainly use weapons (and while Jayce wields a hammer, it's still not exactly hand to hand combat). Vi and Viktor both have body 'modification' parts (her gloves and his cane + leg 'prosthetic').

So, to badly summarize:

J

Blue

Childish and optimistic

Weapons rather than body parts or armor

'Traumatic' thing that happened in the past changed them

'Not from the undercity' mentality

Vi

Red/pink

Realist but stubborn

Body parts that act either as weapons or armor (at least eventually)

Don't want to believe people change

Product of the undercity

I'm not very good at articulating my thoughts in a coherent way, I hope all that makes sense

[mrchoppedslefthand]

[SPOILERS] Homicipher Is Actually Romantic, Convince Me Otherwise [Analysis/Opinion] [SFW]

Word count: 3,332

Edit: 11/7/2024

[Feel free to skip to the last objective "Individual route discussion + what made it romantic" if you want to get straight to the point]

Homicipher is truthfully a romantic (or platonic) game. It is a game that has to be looked at from a different perspective when it comes to love/romance. A game where you have to take in consideration of the characters and the nature of their 'other world'. Today's post will discuss into what I believe made Homicipher an oddly, but romantic game, despite its shortcoming and abrupt ends.

⚠️[MAJOR LORE/CHARACTER ROUTE SPOILERS] ⚠️

Discussion Objectives:

Definition of Love & how it plays into Homicipher

The nature of the 'other world' and ghosts

Individual route discussion + what made it romantic (thoughts)

What Is Love & How Does It Play Into Homicipher?

Love has many layers of definition and associations. Maybe, that is why some may deem Homicipher to be "unromantic" and some disagree on that thought. It also varies based on the type of content/exposure you had consume in the category of love [whether romantic or platonic]. Socially, from a common standpoint, love is a strong attachment or affection for someone. Often from a social standpoint associated with dates, affection, and intimacy. However, love is always changing, since it is a social script on what its suppose to be, and changes as society progresses. Some notions stay the same but some begin to change (just like how language and certain concepts begin to change in the other world, a different society from our own). For the sake of a "true" definition of love. I will be using the definition offered by the Oxford Language Dictionary. So, what is love?

Love as a noun is...

"An intense feeling of deep affection"

"A great interest and pleasure in something"

"A person or thing that one loves"

Love as a verb is...

"Feel deep affection for (someone)"

"Like or enjoy very much"

Not long after its release there had been a fair number of comments/reviews criticizing Homicipher for its lack of romance. This claim is NOT entirely wrong. From the expectations of a "normal" Otome/dating sim it doesn't necessarily meet the requirements because of its lack of intimacy, affection and interest from a HUMAN/SOCIETAL perspective. We must remember that romance/love does not necessarily equate to kissing, hand holding, and intimacy especially considering that these are the HUMAN (societal) views on what romance/love is. A concept that had become lost in the 'other world'. So how can we call Homicipher romantic if we have to cross out the influence of our society? The answer is that we can't fully avoid it, HOWEVER, we must be open to a different perspective of what 'their' version of love is (platonic love/or romantic). No matter how lacking, dense, twisted and grotesque the moments we have spent with these ghosts are. In some shape and form it CAN equate itself to love (platonic/ or romantic). I think a lot of people forget that time itself can be equate to some complicated level of love. The fact you spend time with someone, and it develops to something further for worse or better, something that even love may not be able to name, is what this game demonstrates.

Homicipher has a consistent theme, the loss of truth, the acceptance of ignorance and the concept of eternity. Which shockingly is where the romance comes from. When we allow ourselves to rot in that world. When we ignore the exit and choose to stay, is where the romance comes through. Love is complicated. What can I say?

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

The Nature of the 'Other World' & Ghosts

Alot of the ghosts we encounter can be friendly, but also just as deadly. We hear it from almost all of the casts warning or discussing about how dangerous a lot of the ghosts (including themselves) roam in this world, and in different endings, succumb to this danger ourselves. The longer we stay in this world, we soon start to become no different. As we, a human, begin to slowly transform into a different entity. We begin to react more violently (though it can be argued that since our MC is a serial killer, she might have just been violent and cruel in general). When angered, or things start not to go her way, she gets filled with bloodlust and takes it out on who she's with. Killing is a common thing to do in this world, especially when experiencing anger, sadness and even boredom. The concept of death is a little complicated as they can easily regenerate themselves back to "life". As the game progresses, we learn that some of these ghosts cannot grasp certain concepts (such as love), remember their own name and self, and don't have exact words (sometimes none) for items.

When sometimes even confessing that you like some of the ghosts they question you, and state that they cannot understand you or that feeling (platonic/ or romantic). We are in a setting that is beyond the mortal realm, there aren't any exactly "ideal" dates in a place different from the moral realm... so you're going to be stuck in a scary place, having a scary "date".

However just because they cannot understand the concept of love, doesn't meant that they can't feel it. It is something that the body may still feel, and the mind not being able to put an identity to that feeling or even situation, since meanings and concepts get lost within this realm. The fact that we are allowed to spend an eternity in this realm, with our handsome casts of ghosts. Is oddly and sadly romantic. For Mr. Crawling it is his devotion and loyalty to you, it is how he worries and cares for you, it is his affection and attempts to soothe you. For Mr. Silvair it is his care for you (as research of course lol), your usefulness (which is why he is attracted to you), but even then, one of his endings he keeps you as a head, when you had become useless to him. For Mr. Gap he finds you intriguing, he wants to play and follow you around, always asking for parts of you with consent, loves to brag about himself to you. For Mr. Chopped it is his want to rely on you, to feel safe with you, to protect him, to spend time with him. For Mr. Hood it his willingness to help you for an eternity, to roam with you forever, keeping you away from danger. For Mr. Machete it is the fact you both spend an eternity searching for a home together, to suffer boredom together, to suffer within each other's presence. For Mr. Scarletella it is his obsession for you and his willingness to spend an eternity with you.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Individual Routes + What Made Them Romantic

[Not in any particular order]

Mr. Crawling

If I had to rank who had the most "romantic" route overall, it would be Mr. Crawling. With the definition usage of love from the Oxford dictionary, verb and noun he checks all the list. Not only that, but we spend time with him the most out of all the other casts. He was the very first ghost we meet (briefly in the beginning) and got stuck with. We are like a baby bird imprinting on him because we saw him first and spent time with him the most, so of course we might feel the most attached to him compared to the others. As the game progresses Mr. Crawling doesn't fail to let us know that he cares for us and our safety warning us of the dangers that come and explaining how to navigate our way around danger. He expresses his worries when we disappeared. He seems to have some concept of love (platonic/ or romantic) as he admittedly tells us that he likes us and ask us if we like him. He expresses how he wants to follow and protect us. He also has so many cute scenes! Scenes where he pats our head, scenes where we lay together, chat a lot together. He is devoted and loyal to us, never harming us even once.

We even get a scene where he gets jealous when we called Mr. Chopped cute with the cat headband! So, he also makes an attempt to be cute too! We are always together with him, and that makes us BOTH happy. Although we don't have our traditional romantic dates like shopping, movie night. We get a bed scene and get to take him back home with us.

There are many types of romance. Platonic and romantic. You the reader/player is allowed to view it however you want. The game does not punish you for the lack of interactions with the casts. You just end up missing out on certain scenes/moments with them is all. However, for the sake of this post I will be making attempts to talk about the romantic aspect (but platonic romance can also be put into place).

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Silvair

lt's apparent that Mr. Silvair keeps us as research material and confines us in his lair. He is interested in our body, and also interested in returning our mind/intellect back to its original state. It is this interest in us that makes him "love" us. Does confinement and research count as love? Well...maybe not in terms of human definition but in the Mr. Silvair way, it's the closest thing you can get to romantic (or platonic). Afterall, the concept of love has become lost in this world.

I believe he still has some attachment to us, because in the ending A Head's Life, he still keeps you as a companion along with Mr. Chopped. He claims that you are no longer useful/capable but that it is okay, as long as danger is no longer here. When you choose to ask him why he did what he did and ask if he likes you, he tells you it was for research and that love is something he cannot understand. He also doesn't understand why you get so angry when he helped you return your intellect back. He still though has some sort of concept of empathy, because in his route when you choose to kill him and hide yourself away. He comes follow you and expresses that he's sorry and tells you a little about himself. He allows you free will, at this point, allowing you to leave him or stay with him.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Gap

Mr. Gap always wants a piece of us, literally. Why does he? Because it's just for fun. The most interaction we get with him is through the multiple crevices within this world and the short route he gets in chapter 4. He takes but sometimes may give. However, he doesn't fail to be thoughtful. It's hilarious how in chapter 4 when he offers us a crowbar in exchange for your heart, you can just smack him for it with no consequences. He also likes to brag about himself to you which honestly is a little cute. With his ending Return, we only have him left in the 'other world'. Our comfort lies with him, although he may be a little annoying, he is the only one we have left. We maybe have become a little codependent on him, but maybe he likes that?

God his annoyed/disgusted face is so hilarious, do it again Mr. Gap! He seems to stick around with us mainly just for funsies and being nosy, and honestly, he is so real for that. But it seems he likes to stay around with us at least. In the return end he is with us, and continues to stay lurking, perhaps watching over us until he is needed. Quite handy am I right? Haha.

He is depicted as quite the gentleman, but also just as fun and teasing. There are times where he does help you with no charge, such as barging into his hole (the face he makes in that scene is hilarious). Again, when presented with beating him for your crowbar, he gets a little upset but, honestly still helps you out. He probably thinks violence is funny which is why he constantly still teases you by asking to take away your body parts. It's just too fun!

Someone had brought up to my attention that Mr.Gap tends to ask for parts that can be easy to part with as we progress. Asking for our feet, legs, and fingers instead, when he seems to still clearly prefer the heart over the other parts. He adjusts his request when he realizes we won’t give our heart.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Chopped

Mr. Chopped is just a head; how can he possibly be or have anything romantic? Well, not necessarily to the level of Mr. Crawling but, we get to have a few small moments with him and spend some time with him. Since he is just a head, he can't help but need to rely on others. Of course, he has to be selectively about it because falling in the wrong hands devastates him.

Mr. Chopped when he gets forced into playing with the deer child, he seems happy to see a familiar face and calls us out to help him. Our poor baby was in trouble!

His ending head hunt is tragically sad but also bittersweet. MC cares so much about Mr. Chopped that she spends an eternity as an entity searching for a lost head, searching for Mr. Chopped who she failed to rescue.

During his own special route Mr. Chopped does his best to help us, but there is only so much a head can do. To make up for his lack of body though, he seems to be more expressive with his mouth and emotions. We get to take him to get a haircut and wash his hair. This seems pretty date like to me. Although our time was abrupt and short with Mr. Chopped. It makes me happy that we get this small, cute scene with him, which makes him much more lovable.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Hood

Mr. Hood protects you from harm, and also heeds your commands. He also carries you around. He means no harm and is there to guide. He cares for your safety and seems to dislike anything dangerous or threatening towards him and others that he protects.

At the end of his route, he states how often you get in danger and takes you with him, telling you that he must protect you since you asked him to (referring to an earlier scenario when you asked him to stay with you, when you reunited with Mr. Crawling and the others, but he leaves). So I would assume he would always be by your side now eternally staying together and protecting you from danger when needed. How cute! Some people are into that. But personally, for me Mr. Hood felt more like a father/brother to me. Maybe it was because he was always willing to guide us? But some people are into the brotherly/fatherly type of men, and hey I don't judge.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Machete

At first, I did not see the appeal to Mr. Machete, he seemed like a ghost that killed for boredom and most of the time we just followed him around aimlessly...WELL, after playing his route and letting it soak in my brain. That is entirely the whole point of his character. He is a ghost that had become bored because he had too much time on his hands and continues to search for his home. He is our tsundere dummy macho ghost, and honestly, I love that about him. He could've killed us again like how he tried earlier, but after that first attempt, he reluctantly allows us to follow him. It's funny how much he runs away if the odds are against him, and when he mocks us it's even more hilarious. Mr. Machete likes us if we are strong opponent for him, he even expresses that he thinks we are fun and likes us when we defeat Mr. Hugeface on our own.

Not going to lie, I fell for Mr. Machete right here. We were low on blood, and he just slices his hand, FEEDING us HIS BLOOD. Like OMG that was so hot, he opens our mouth forceful, and we drink his blood. He somewhat cares about us, to be doing all of that for us. After that we get a timed choice to stall or follow him. When you choose to stall he pauses with you and asks if you're okay and to catch up with him. For someone who had been reluctant and annoyed at us for following him, took a moment of his time to wait for you. He WANTED you to tag along with him. We then venture on with him aimlessly searching for his and our home. Torturing each other with our presences. But maybe, just maybe, they can slowly become that home together that they were searching for.

·:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:··:¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨:·

Mr. Scarletella

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. At first, he appears to be just any ghost that wants to attack us. It took me a while to warm up to him because of so little we knew about him. I thought he wanted to take our name for fun/or collection, but then it's revealed that he knows us. That he harbors some sort of love and obsession for us and believes that we love him because of all the blood and bodies we "offered" him. In a twisted way, this situation is a cute and romantic misunderstanding. Mr. Scarletella fell in love with us for providing him many blood and bodies. He wants us to spend an eternity with him. He WANTS to spend an eternity with us. He invites us to this other world because perhaps he wants us to become a ghostly being just like him, or maybe he wants to have easier access to us (since his myth that he only appears on rainy days) to meet us. Although we didn't get to have as many interactions with him, that is what makes this love toxic. It is a parasocial love, he fell in love with us from afar. When you piece everything together with your dictionary the words he proposes to you sound like wedding vows when you give your name to him. Which make it all so more lovely, even if he takes our soul away.

(My translation/interpretation of the scene, where he asks for your name)

Chapter 2, Scene 24

Scarletella: "You found your name...?"

Scarletella: "Teach me your name." (ARF ARF WRARF)

Scarletella: "I want you." (YES PLEASE)

Scarletella: "Will you give your name?" (OF COURSE)

Scarletella: "Your name?" (👁️👄👁️)

*You give him your name here*

Scarletella: "I have your name."

Scarletella: "I have obtained you." (YES YOU DID, COME TAKE ME)

Scarletella: "Let's leave together." (ARF ARF WRARFFFFFFFF)

Scarletella: "I love you"

Scarletella: "And you love me."

Scarletella: "You gave it to me...Thank you" (I'LL GIVE YOU IT ALL)

Scarletella: "Forever/eternally together..." (YES SIR)

Scarletella: "Together." (ARF ARF WRARRF ARFA)

He is quite the romancer hehe. It seems like Mr. Scarletella has some form of concept when it comes to love, which is to be together forever, even if you end up as a blood pool. Together is together.

I find it interesting how his two endings: Scarletella and Scarlet Rain parallels each other so well. In the Scarletella ending, we (mc unknowingly) give our consent to being together forever with Mr. Scarletella, but we are still alive. When MC wakes up, she sees a clear umbrella on the floor and picks it up. I believe that we have now embodied or spirited the umbrella, spending eternity with Mr. Scarletella. He owns us now.

However, in the Scarlet Rain end he becomes ours, the umbrella stays red, and we still, eternally are together forever.

[floral-cavern]

So.. Sarcastic Chorus has retired from doing Helluvaverse content. This is a huge blow to the series. If you somehow don’t know, Sarcastic Chorus is the Helluvaverse YouTuber. He’s done so many analysis videos, it’s kind of part of his brand in the same way FNAF is associated with MatPat. The fact that Chorus left the shows is crazy, but, honestly, it’s just a testament to how bad this show has been getting.

This is the view count for the first three episodes for seasons 1 and 2

And if you think that’s bad, look at the difference between the season finales for each season

(I know technically Ozzie’s isn’t the season finale, but Queen Bee doesn’t count because of how long it took to come out)

People are tired of the show focusing on the wrong things. I seriously recommend Chorus’s video, it has so many good points. And one point I really want to talk about is Stolas.

I talk a lot about the bad writing in the show in general and how I don’t like Stolas, but I just want to say, I don’t like him anymore. I used to really like his character.. but season 2 completely ruined him for me because they refuse to acknowledge that he has any flaws. Rather than tell “we know Stolitz has flaws on both sides of the relationship, both will work on that,” instead, it’s all just Blitzo. They’ve spent 3 whole episodes just shitting on Blitzo, when… where’s that same treatment for Stolas? Stolas is a classist, racist, rapist. But the show seems to just… forget this. They’re backpedaling so hard, I'm surprised they haven’t fallen off the bike.

I used to find Stolas an interesting character and I was so excited to see where they would take his flaws and mistakes. Like, think about it. Stolas is completely naive, having been sheltered his whole life. The only concept for genuine intimacy he has comes from erotica. Of course he’s going to have a skewed idea of what sex is like when the only sex he’s ever had is with Stella, who, and I quote, “just lays there staring at the wall” where Stella has to do all the work. Ya… that is fucked and a form of sexual abuse, just like what Stolas does to Blitzo. So, I was interested to see where they would take this cycle of abuse that Stolas is so accustomed to and how they were going to have him break it. How was Stolas going to learn his idea of intimacy is wrong?

Well… he doesn’t. Not really. He does realize this transaction is wrong, but, when he tells this all to Blitzo and when Blitzo doesn’t have the reaction he wants, Stolas throws a fucking tantrum. He walks away and refuses to let Blitzo speak, he denies having ever done anything wrong, says that Blitzo was the one who always makes things about sex when that is NOT TRUE. And the worst part? The show treats Stolas like he’s right. They never do anything to show us that Stolas is a hypocrite, instead, like I said earlier, only punishing Blitzo. And don’t even pull the “he was banished” card! Stolas was not being punished for being a neglectful father, or for being an abusive partner. He was being punished… for a heroic sacrifice. He was being banished because Andre doesn’t like him and everyone is mean to Stolas so we have to feel so bad for him, guys!

I just… I started to have my doubts for the show around Full Moon, but I wanted to stick with the show. I liked Apology Tour, but did find it a bit weird that Stolas was being woobied, but I just assumed it was because the next episode, Stolas would be the one receiving the punishing. But the next episode.. WAS ANOTHER HATE ON BLITZO EPISODE. So I told myself, boy I told myself, that the next episode will be focusing on Stolas’s flaws, on Stolas’s part on why this relationship didn’t work. AND THEY DIDN’T FUCKING DO THAT STILL. In fact, Mastermind was just full of Stolas unnecessarily insulting Blitzo, calling him an idiot and whatnot. Like.. GIVE THIS GUY A BREAK, HOLY FUCK. WE GET IT.

This show has gotten so fucking infuriating. Good on Chorus for leaving. Me, personally? I’m going to keep watching, out of curiosity and because I hate myself, but if the show gets anymore infuriating, I may just leave. Because this show is so non-self aware with its black and white writing while it tries so damn hard to have a moral high horse.

So, actually, no. Not ‘fuck Stolas’. Fuck the writers for being so blind to the kinds of behaviors they are endorsing and encouraging with him.

[loverslantern]

Mirror- Dean Winchester x f! reader oneshot

Description: Reader doesn’t feel pretty so Dean tries to show her what he sees in the way he knows best: praise.

Warnings: It’s hot and heavy in here, inherently sexual but nothing happens, manhandling?, praise

Word count: 2k

Note: This is not only my first time writing something like this but also my first time writing something not related to The Hunter and The Witch series so please leave feedback!

  I catch my reflection on the screen of my laptop and groan. My face looks weird today. It’s just one of those days where I just couldn’t feel…pretty or nice or any other adjective. It shouldn’t matter now when I’m alone in my motel room and researching for the next hunt. There’s no one to impress in the desolate room other than the four beige walls and a creaky bed. 

  It shouldn’t matter. To be fair it shouldn’t matter in general when beauty is an objective concept, and yet it does. I do not know the psychology behind it, maybe it’s a biological thing as animals would choose the mate that’s more appealing or strong to have offspring that can survive. I shake my head, ridding myself of the thought. This would just spiral into a psychological analysis that would only make me think of it further rather than ignore it. 

  It’s an obsessive thing, isn’t it?

  Either way, I don’t like the way I look today. I couldn’t get my hair to look just right this morning and I tried so many up-do’s that my arms got sore. It still didn’t look right, so I left it down. 

  And my face just looks wrong. Maybe my eyes are too big or too small in proportion to the rest of my face. Or, maybe my jawline is too soft, perhaps I’m not rough enough. Perhaps I’m too rough. Somehow, every possible thing feels true. 

  I groan again, leaning my head back against the headboard of the bed, and squeeze my eyes shut as if it will get rid of it all. I’m meant to be focused on research. It was supposed to help. But stupid screens and their stupid reflections.

  The jingle of keys forces my eyes open, my eyes landing on my door as it clicks open. “Hey, sweetheart,” Dean greets, casually inviting himself in. 

  “Hi,” I breathe. I suppose the consequence of giving someone a spare key is that they will use said key. But, I’m not that bad of a thing considering it’s Dean who’s walking in. “I’m gonna head to a bar, you in?”

  “Eh,” I answer. “You go ahead. ‘Not feeling it tonight.”

  He eyes me for a moment, squinting just slightly. “Not even as an excuse to dress up and listen to music?” he pushes. “‘My treat.” Of course, his treat meant a fake card or money he got from hustling. But, god the way he smiles and holds his hands up as he tries to convince me is cuter than it should be. “Sorry, Dean,” I say despite the sight, “Just not feeling it.”

  His shoulders and smile drop, “Come on I’ll buy you as much (favorite drink) as you want.”

  “You can go without me you know?” I point out as he saunters over to the bed and plops himself down. “We both know you’re gonna be leaving with some random girl anyway.” 

  He rolls his eyes as he leans back on his elbows, his black shirt flexing against his muscles. He knows I’m right. “I thought Sam was the nerd,” he comments, ignoring what I said by lifting my laptop off my lap and discarding it in the empty space next to him. “Why don’t you wanna go out? ‘You feeling okay?” he asks and for a moment as his eyes scan my face, I can see the concern pass through them. 

  “Oh, I’m fine,” I insist, trying to be as convincing as possible. Yet, he sees right through me, giving me a pointed look. He’s hard to lie to. I break, shaking my head, “Fine. I just…I don’t feel pretty today so I don’t really wanna go out.”

  His eyebrows raise, his lips parting a bit as if that’s the last thing he expected me to say. “You?”

  My eyebrows furrow, head tilting in confusion, “….Yeah….” Who else?

  He studies my face again and I worry he’ll see what I’m seeing. He’ll see I’m not pretty. His features soften regardless. “Come with me,” he announces, gesturing a hand to follow as he gets up from the bed. I don’t listen, giving him a confused and cautious look. “Come on,” he insists, his voice firm. 

  I hold back my sigh as I stand from the bed. I almost didn’t want to know what he had in store. But, he doesn’t leave me with much choice but to turn back as he takes hold of my hand. His hand is big and warm as it envelopes mine, butterflies erupting in my gut at the simple touch.

  He leads me into the bathroom, his hand leaving mine to travel up my arms and to my shoulders, positioning me in front of the mirror. My hips press against the sink, his hands on my upper arms and his body close behind mine. He nearly looms over me with his tall stature, his head and eyes tilted a little down as he uses the mirror to meet my eyes. “Don’t look at me. Look at yourself,” he directs. But my eyes linger on him, on his pretty green eyes, sharp sculptured jaw, and his straight nose. His fingers tap against the skin of my upper arm, “Come on,” he encourages, his voice a little gravely. 

  I give in. He makes it so easy to give in. I pull my eyes from him and land on myself. A frown pulls on my lips as my eyes jump around my features, even my frown looks wrong. He squeezes my arms, gaining my attention back in the same second my gut lurches. “Uh-uh,” he hums. “Eyes back on you, baby.”

  Jesus. 

  Again, I force my eyes away and I can feel his burning gaze on me. “What do you see?” he asks. I scuff and roll my eyes, “Dean, I’m not—“

  His hands rub up and down my upper arms. “Just—what do you see?”

  I bite on my bottom lip. I look unamused. That’s what I’m seeing. I sigh, trying to humor him. “Myself,” I answer plainly.

  He tuts, “Not what I meant, sweetheart. What do you see that you don’t like?”

  Everything. That seems like an appropriate answer. But I can’t just say that and I don’t. I hardly want to share what I feel when it’s hard to put words to it. “How about this?” he says, his head dipping down to occupy the space by my neck, putting himself closer to my level than far above me. “I like your smile,” he admits, his voice so soft it’s like a rough whisper. “I like when you smile at me…” he squeezes my arms, “like I’m damn important.”

  “You ar—“

  “Uh-uh,” he hums again. “This is about you, baby.” 

  One of his hands drifts upwards, the muscles in his forearm flexing. The sight is nearly intoxicating as I watch it move in the mirror, resting at the base of my neck as he stands to his height again. His thumb brushes back and forth against my collarbone, his eyes downturned to his movements. “Keep watching yourself,” he reminds me. I hadn’t realized I was watching him but could you blame me?

  He presses me back against him, his body solid and warm. I wonder if he can feel the increase in my heart rate. “And your skin…always so smooth. Hardly any scars.” He presses down on the base of my neck, encouraging my head to lean back against his chest. My breath hitches.

  “Shows how careful you are, yeah?” I can almost feel his warm breath as clearly as I can feel my heart beating against my ribs. “You a careful girl?” His gaze is burning as it travels down me. “Yeah…” he drawls, eyes traveling back up. “You are.” His thumb taps once against my collarbone, reminding me to keep my eyes on myself which seems like an impossible feat now. “There you go,” he praises, his voice low. 

My skin feels warm. My everything feels warm as if I am a furnace with the sole purpose of burning and he stokes the fire, poking at it, adding wood to keep it going. 

“Those eyes,” he mumbles, and I can feel the rumble in his chest as the words protrude from his lips. “‘Damn pretty eyes. Then you give me that look…fuck.”

  My eyes flick to his, something burning deep within my gut. He doesn’t scorn me for looking away from myself. “Yeah…” he whispers, eyes meeting mine in the mirror. “That look right there. Eyes all big, your lips parted just a little.” His hand drifts up from my neck, gracing my jaw. His thumb presses on my bottom lip. “So pretty…” he mumbles. “‘Don’t know what you aren’t seeing. Can you look at yourself again baby?” 

  I do as told and my knees feel wobbly with the heat that pools within. It’s the sight of him rather than me. The sight of him practically playing with me. “Want you to know how pretty you are,” he mumbles. “How good you are. God, you’re so good.”

  His thumb is a little wet as it slips from my lip onto my chin and my neck. His lidded eyes watch the slight mess he makes, his breath a little shallower. He hums, his chest rumbling with it. “Do you know what I think?” he asks.

  “What?” I answer the single word sounding like a sigh. My eyes drop to my lips in the mirror, my bottom lip coated in a thin layer of my own saliva like a coat of lip gloss. My breasts press against my tank top, seemingly wanting to spill over with each shallow breath. The soft swells of skin peeking from the neckline. His hands drop to my hips, pushing me forward until they’re pressing into the sink with a force that knocks me forward a little, a gasp escaping my lips. I grip the sides of the sink to catch myself. His fingers press into my hips as he holds me firmly. His body looms over me as his eyes take in my bent-over form. Those stunning green eyes that usually resemble the greenery of a forest when the sun is shining through the canopy of leaves just right, now a darkened green like the parts of the forest the sun can’t reach. 

  His hands massage my hips roughly, pushing them forward before drawing them back. His eyes are downturned to the movement, his mouth parted a little in the same manner mine is. My breath is quicker, and my heart is pounding in my chest like it’s trying to escape the space behind my ribs. “What’d I say about keeping your eyes on yourself?” He says roughly despite his own distraction. I swallow roughly, forcing my eyes back on myself for the umpteenth time.   

  He continues his actions, eyes burning into my hips and my ass like nothing else matters. “I think…” he starts, circling back to answer the question he asked me before, one I forgot about. “I think it should be sinful,” the word is like a purr coming from his lips, “to look this good. To be so fucking pretty.” It should be ironic coming from him but why would he go through all this trouble, all this guiding, pushing, pressing to convince me of something he didn’t believe in? And I can see it. I can see it, through the fog of a bad day, exactly what he’s seeing, or at least part of it. 

  “Are you seeing it?” he asks in a low voice as if he saw the change in my eyes. “Yeah,” I breathe, nodding, “Yes, I see it.”

  “Good,” he answers firmly, and yet I can hear the cocky smile that no doubt threatens his lips. Then, his hand circles around the back of my neck, tangling into my hair. He squeezes just once before he’s guiding me up, straightening me out ‘till I’m standing straight again. I spin in his hold, his large hands immediately going to my hips to keep me pressed into the sink. His eyes meet mine, something written in his irises that I can’t decipher. Then, they drop to my lips and then to my chest, that cocky smile finally making its appearance as his eyes drag back up to my lips. “Where’d you learn that?” I ask.

  His smile widens as he answers, “You don’t wanna know.”

[santacoppelia]

The HUGE analysis - This season starts and ends with a discussion, doesn't it?

Ok, my loves. This was one of the really long metas I've been working with, and probably the one that has taken me the longest (because it depended a lot on rewatching the season time and again).

I couldn't help to notice that the fist interaction Aziraphale and Crowley have in season 2 is a fight, really. Yeah, we have the beautiful “in the beginning” sequence, with both of them being angels and happy and all the such (oh, how lovely, Neil Gaiman planting the seeds of why it will matter to us that Aziraphale will not be fighting the idea of inviting Crowley to Heaven, because he remembers that happy, careless guy). But after the intro, we see them having a big disagreement… And we end the season in the biggest disagreement they have had, probably, in 6,000 years.

I love over-analyzing and dissecting narratives and characters, and more so if I can use only what we’ve been shown in the screen. Therefore, I believe that the first fight of the season tells us a lot of the things we will need to know to understand the final fight of the season between them. Let’s take a look, shall we?

The first fight is motivated by having an amnesiac Gabriel in the bookshop.

They see the same circumstance: Gabriel in the bookshop means trouble with Heaven. He is also an individual risk, because he has menaced Aziraphale directly (well, Crowley under the visage of Aziraphale).

It affects each of them differently: even when they both panic, Aziraphale feels compelled to be kind to Gabriel (gives him a blanket and hot cocoa) while Crowley has a full-on panic induced reaction and gets defensive.

They propose opposite solutions: Azi wants to do the Good thing, taking the “higher road” (help Gabriel), while Crowley wants to do His Own thing: “Protect the precious, peaceful, fragile existence I have carved for myself”

At that moment, Aziraphale corrects him and marks a “we”, which is very interesting. But immediately after that, Aziraphale gets all "my way or the highway".

Crowley asks for clarification, with a well-leveled tone of voice: “Is this how it is going to go?”

Azi clarifies "no, I want you to help me!" But then he does the passive-aggressive thing: "if you won't, you won't". (oh, Aziraphale, how you triggered me here, my dear chap. I was angry at the character the first 6 times I saw this)

Therefore, Crowley is out. He marks a clear limit: “I won't. You are on your own”, and then storms out. No Eccles cakes would help him: he needs a breather and counting to 10. That doesn't help either.

Crowley only comes back after gaining an extra perspective: the "extreme sanctions" talk with Beelzebub.

When he comes back, Aziraphale will stand his ground: he feels he deserves an apology, which is delivered via a “I was wrong, you were right” literal admission (even when he probably wasn't "right", but that's their way... And they've been doing it since 1650, or so they say). Then they are able to work together again.

Now, let’s see how this dynamic plays out in their last discussion of the season:

They come from different sides of the same experience: Crowley went to Heaven to investigate and learned about the plans to continue with the end of the world, while Aziraphale stayed defending the bookshop. Then Crowley saves the humans, while Aziraphale solved the Beelzebub + Gabriel affair.

They haven’t had time to talk, as they get interrupted by The Metatron. While he takes Aziraphale, Crowley receives a visit from Maggie and Nina.

Each one of them gained an extra different perspective: Azi, the Metatron proposal (and veiled menace); Crowley, the pep talk/scolding from the couple they were trying to get together.

This makes them develop different solutions:

Crowley wants to finally admit what Azi has been saying all the season: they are a "we" (Azi said so when Crowley talked about his “precious, peaceful, fragile existence”; he said it again when talking about “our car” and reinforced it with the bookshop)

Azi wants to take the "higher road": go to Heaven, reinstate Crowley as an angel, so they can still work together.

Crowley sees the “usual dynamic” of their disagreements coming: it will be Azi’s way (or the highway). That has happened before, in front of our eyes, and not only in this season: it happened also in season 1, but we have already attested that it is still happening, and it is even “worse” (Aziraphale being a little “petty” with the “if you do, it is fine, but if you won’t, you are on your own” in the Gabriel discussion).

Crowley gets indignant. He asks, tentatively, if he told him where to stick it… And then he reinforces his belief. We are better than that, YOU are better than that, you don’t need them, I don’t need them; then he makes the first mention of the offer of getting back to Hell (which he hadn’t shared with Aziraphale), and makes a new point: I said no, neither should you!

Aziraphale goes back to the “you are the bad guys!” thing. Heaven being the side of Truth, of Light, of Good… It is not the propaganda Crowley needed for this move.

Crowley then clarifies the fallacy in his logic: when Heaven ends life on Earth, it’ll be just as dead as if Hell ended it.

Aziraphale then sees the "undesirable result" coming: Crowley is not going to accept, not with that argument.

Crowley makes his plead grow in urgency: Tell me you said no.

Aziraphale’s pitch of voice goes high (usually used as a sign of distress): “If I’m in charge, I can make a difference.”

Crowley understands. This is his “my way or the highway” moment. That’s why he comes up with the courage to make his half-proposal-half admission.

Crowley never gets to state out loud the “I want us to be together in a formal way” part. His voice breaks before he does so. He mentions all of the reasons they have to stay together, which Aziraphale already knows: we have been together for a long time, we’ve been a group (“our own side” was the way he always said it before) and we’ve spent our existence pretending that we aren’t (Azi also knows that! He has been working hard into making Crowley notice it!)

You can see, when they shoot Aziraphale’s face, he squints a little during that moment: maybe questioning, a little disbelief? As usual with Michael Sheen, it is a blink it and you’ll miss it moment.

After the grunt, Crowley proposes his alternative solution: going off together, using Beelzebub & Gabriel as an example that they could.

Therefore, what Aziraphale has just listened is what he already knew: yes, they are a “we”. Crowley wants to run away (he had proposed it twice during the Armageddidn’t, another pattern they have already established).

The next step is the usual way for Aziraphale: he reinforces his proposal: come with me, to Heaven. Ill’ run it, you can be my second in command. This idea has rubbed me wrong since the first time I watched this scene. Why remark the hierarchy? (not to say that I’m in Crowley’s side in here, but… It was weird and uncomfortable to think of them in a vertical power structure; they have always been equals).

Then, he goes back to making a difference, only it is “we” this time. Crowley is noticing he won’t back down… But Aziraphale usually doesn’t.

“You can’t leave this bookshop” works as a representation, a figure of speech. “This Bookshop” is “This life we have been building”, and they both understand it as such.

“Oh, Crowley… Nothing lasts forever…” For Aziraphale, it means he can leave this for something greater. For Crowley, it means… Actually, the same. But without him. Because he knows the “my way or the highway” side of Aziraphale, and none of them will budge. Aaaaand… that’s Crowley heart breaking. The rest of the scene happens with Crowley in “breakup mode”.

Aziraphale is used to “the discussion dance”. He Insists, “Crowley! Come back, to Heaven, work with me! We can be together, Angels! Doing good!”. He promises all he can: “come back, work with me, we can be together”, which have always been Crowley’s triggers to change his mind. However, the problem lies within the “angels doing good”. That’s the part that Aziraphale would need to let go before getting back to Crowley.

And then, he breaks down: “I need you!!” That has always worked! Aziraphale knows that Crowley loves being needed, he won’t leave his angel when in need, right?

And then, he gets angry. And he questions if Crowley has understood what he is offering, which transforms in an “I don’t think your exactly and my exactly are the same exactly” all over again.

Crowley is already brokenhearted, so he answers truthfully, as far as he knows. He understands how terrible the offer of going back to heaven is for both of them, and is not aware of the veiled threat in Metatron’s offer. He knows that going back to Heaven is a non-negotiable boundary, and Aziraphale is absolutely determined to cross it.

Aziraphale, then, does his passive-aggressive shit again: “I guess there is nothing more to say”. My guy, my love, you need to become better at negotiating with your loved one.

This is where Crowley decides to show, don’t tell, the hurt: no nightingales. And then… The “You idiot. We could have been… us” (no, you couldn’t, it was always too late!!! First the pandemic, which I’ve decided to treat as canon, then Gabriel. They never stood a chance).

In this context, Crowley’s kiss is a desperate way to say good-bye to the person he cared most for the last 6,000 years; also an angry way to regain some semblance of control and affect Aziraphale; and a final way to get some “closure”. Is there desire? Is there love? Maybe. But they are lost in a cocktail of emotions that have been stated during the rest of the discussion.

The angry “I forgive you”, which is also a usual dynamic for Aziraphale when he is angry with Crowley, gets there too late for Crowley to react to. He has already “checked out”. That’s why the “don’t bother” feels almost like an afterthought and comes after a small sigh.

After watching this 16 times, I’m pretty confident that the first thing Aziraphale mouths is a “no…” and then… he sobs a little. Michael Sheen, you’re a beautiful actor. The rest of it is a masterclass in using microexpressions to convey a whirlwind of emotions in under 2 minutes.

Sooooo... Did I hurt my own emotions while writing this? Yes. Did I absolutely need to do so? Also yes. Even when I like doing intertextual readings (and that's why I like bringing some theology to some of my musings), reading what is in "the text" (in the scenes we have watched, in the dialogues we've been shown) gives me an enormous amount of pleasure, and I find a lot of comfort in believing that most of the things that I'll need to understand and enjoy a great piece of media are being given to me inside it. And I believe Good Omens is a great piece of media!!

I have no Shakespeare to offer you this time. Let me know what you think!!

[cecilscribbles]

From Now, Until the End of Time: An Essay and Character Analysis Disguised as Ship Propaganda

So. You guys really liked that post, huh.

This essay has been a long time coming. I've spent hours awake at night thinking about these two characters, drawn heaps of fanart, I've made Spotify playlists and Pinterest boards, all in an attempt to drown out the urge to eat fiberglass insulation. I love these two, so, so much, and I hope this analysis does them justice.

It’s just under here. vvv

The Past

Starting off with the obvious: these two have history. Bill came into Ford's life at the absolute perfect time. He'd been seemingly betrayed by Stanley, the one person he thought he could count on, he'd been working himself half to death trying to wrangle some decent qualifications out of Backupsmore, and was attempting to make a name for himself in Gravity Falls. Things weren't looking too good. He'd hit a roadblock in his studies, and he felt like he still stuck out, even in a town full of cryptids and outcasts alike. He was getting desperate. He was vulnerable.

Ford often says he wants to become a pioneer, a founding father of science; which isn't necessarily wrong, he isn't lying when he says so, but this ambition really stems from wanting to be accepted and understood. Ford is cripplingly lonely, and you can see how this profound isolation reflects in every aspect of his life and his relationships with others.

So when Bill comes along, it's everything Ford could ask for: validation, understanding, mutual trust, and someone who helps him follow his dream.

They hit it off immediately. “You can call me anything except late for dinner!” “You catch on quick! I think I'm starting to like you, Sixer!” “Perfectly legitimate use of an Oxford comma!” “Jinx! WOW! Get out of my head!” “You first.” This is the first time Ford (and Bill) has clicked with someone in years.

Ford wasn't the only one in need of a relationship like this. Bill, struggling with the guilt of destroying Euclydia, wanted something - or someone - under his control. He wanted to be revered, to be seen as something other than the bad guy. Who better to come across than a lost soul, desperate to feel chosen, to feel special, with a passion for the supernatural?

Even if it wasn’t for long, they worked. They enjoyed each other’s company. And while Bill was using Ford for his own gain, and what they had wasn’t exactly healthy, there were real feelings on both sides.

There still are.

Which is a perfect segue into the next section.

The Present

You wouldn't want to be in a room with these two, would you? They have an absolutely explosive dynamic, an unbelievable amount of tension and chemistry. I think this is because they want to believe they hate each other, but whether they like it or not, they satisfy each other’s cravings and desires. They get the itches the other just can’t scratch. This was especially prominent during the early days of their relationship, but it doesn’t end there.

When Ford needed validation, Bill flattered him endlessly. When he was in shambles after falling through the portal, hunting down Bill gave him a mission to follow. When Bill wanted control, Ford was easily manipulated. When he was bored, he was there for him to play with as much as he so desired.

All of this, and yet: they can’t help but destroy each other.

Ford spiraled into paranoia because of Bill. He constructed the portal he fell into because of Bill. He got captured and tortured because of Bill.

Bill drove himself half insane trying to get Ford to listen to him. He had a drunken meltdown because of Ford. Weirdmaggedon ultimately failed because of Ford!

These two know each other to an uncomfortable degree. They have both been at their most vulnerable with the other person. They know each other’s bodies better than their own (not trying to imply anything here other than possession, but… take it as you will). They know each other's minds better than their own. What they have is messy and toxic and strangely intimate. The bizarre mix of emotions that they feel for each other makes them so interesting to watch.

The Future

The jewel in the crown of an already delectable dynamic; the amount of potential they have.

They’re often toeing some razor-thin line; between platonic and romantic, romantic and sexual, life and death, something and nothing. There are so many ways their relationship can go, so many realities, yet they’re together in every single one.

If one thing went a little different, they could still be together. If Bill had been honest in the beginning, or changed his tactics during Weirdmaggedon, he could have won Ford over. With so much time, so much knowledge of the other person, so much… whatever their twisted version of love is, the possibilities are endless. And I think this is a pretty good place to sign off.

The past, present and future, love and hatred, pain and ecstacy, this dynamic has it all. And the recent release of The Book of Bill only adds fuel to the fire. It's so refreshing to see so many new faces in the community, as well as old ones finally proven right. I didn’t doubt you for a second.

If you’ve made it to the end, thanks! I hope it was worth your time. Stay weird.

- Cecil

[mellosdrawings]

Was playing through ignihyde chapter and I cam across the part where Leona told Jamil off abojt his behavior essentially saying Jamil was useless and not needed to do stuff. Jamil most likely didn’t understand where Leona was coming from. Cause Leona isn’t as “weak” or “unaware” as Kalim. So he didn’t need the protection of Jamil.

Leona was also kinda wrong for the way he delivered it. And it was also covered around with insults

Where I’m getting at is what if Jamil still lingers on with what Leona says and kinda backs off or feels useless around Leona. Kinda being more awkward cause he realized what Leona meant

Some angst for the ship skdndfjsjsjs hope this makes sense 🌸

Ok so, you probably expected some comic/fic ideas about this, but their dynamic during the STYX hellscape had me obsessed for months and you unlocked it all with that ask. It won't be necessarily shippy but it's a long rambling analysis.

ALL THE SPOILERS FOR BOOK 6 AFTER THE CUT!

Their dynamic is so terrible (/pos), I wasn't expecting them to get along the least (honestly thought Riddle and Azul would throw hands at some point, I've also obsessed on their over-confident/under-confident dynamic but that'sfor another time), but in retrospect it makes sense.

I always find Jamil's behavior to be cringe but there are reasons for it. Really he's the one who struggles the most (not counting Idia) during this chapter.

He's the only Vice Housewarden in the group, and also a servant. When it comes to choosing the groups he doesn't give his opinion at all and just goes where there's still place (with Leona) and then rely entirely on his habits and upbringing with him. His role is to protect the fancy person that accompanies him. Usually it's Kalim, but here it's an actual prince who could rain hell on the Asim should he get wounded while under Jamil’s charge.

Jamil thinks about his duty first, that's why he so overbearing until Leona tells him off.

Because Leona isn't Kalim. He’s a lazy twat (/affectionate) but he can also be very independent and he’s probably one of the strongest mages in NRC. He doesn't need Jamil to protect him. If anything he should be the one protecting Jamil considering he is younger and less experimented. (Plus Leona has his pride despite the laziness)

While Jamil thinks of his duties, Leona uses situational logic. They're in a dangerous position where they don't have time to play master and subordinate, it'd be a hassle if Jamil gets wounded.

And it does become a hassle when he gets wounded.

Seriously their dynamic was good.

But also Leona is terrible at communicating. It's a running theme that he expects others to understand his meaning from minimal explanations. For Jamil who is used to Kalim who is rather transparent with his needs and wants, that's a difficulty to tackle.

Add to that the fact that Leona can't help but rile others with his words and you quickly have a Jamil who doubts himself and starts to put himself down.

Again.

Because he's always put down. And this time by an actual royalty.

Like, yeah, Leona was a dick to him and didn't consider the pressure of duty Jamil constantly has on his shoulders. But also... he wasn't wrong. Jamil puts himself down even without external pressure. He's all talk but the only time he actually did something was when he overblotted. During Book 5 he showed no change in behavior except to accept the spotlight when handed (and even then his first reflex was to put Kalim forward, because that's what he's always done.)

While terribly worded and mostly unaware of Jamil's actual situation, Leona was right to set Jamil straight. He could do more. He should do more.

And Leona sees himself in Jamil. That's the moment when you get a glimpse of actual N2 squad. Leona knows they're both constantly second, but where he has no exit door, he sees one for Jamil. He might not stay a servant his whole life. Especially since Kalim is very fond of Jamil. It might take time, but Jamil might still have an exit door to his freedom. (And if Jamil ends up marrying Leona the exit door becomes glaringly obvious)

I like to start the LeoJami relationship right after this book precisely because there's no way Leona’s words didn't kick the ants' nest inside Jamil’s brain, and because Leona shows genuine interest (and a smidgen of care) for Jamil.

And yes, despite Leona cheering him up in his own way by the end of the chapter, he still said a lot of harsh words. Jamil is a notorious overthinker, he would probably alternate between the "I have more potential to growth than others" and "I'm completely useless and would fail to do my job if I stay that way, which would have repercussions on me and my family".

Leona sees potential in him. That's actually huge, you know? So far the only ones who did were Azul, Vil (about dancing and singing at least), and maybe Kalim? But here you have a prince making him understand he's got potential.

Their relationship after STYX is definitely a mess that can turn angsty really fast on Jamil's end, I agree with you. But sometimes you need to break a rock to show its shiny insides. You can get from this with Leona lazily helping Jamil out of his comfort zone (because, once more, Leona sees himself in Jamil) until Jamil improves and finds his self-confidence once more. From there the angst has calmed and you can go to the lovey-dovey stuff!

Does any of this make sense?

I'm done rambling. That was a long one :')

[aihoshiino]

chapter 157 thoughts

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 14… IN THIS CHAPTER OF ALL CHAPTERS…????

Aqua Hoshigan Status: White

Congrats to 157 for taking 144's crown as the Oshi no Ko chapter that has vexed and confused me the most. Taken entirely in isolation, it's a sweet, lowkey, calm before the storm moment… but it's entirely because it stands in such stark isolation from the events surrounding it that it feels so baffling. It's like an amped up version of the issues with 156 - when viewed in isolation, you can't strictly say there's anything wrong with it, but as a part of the sequential storytelling of Oshi no Ko it just feels off. I'm reminded of the weird, off-kilter pacing of the Movie Arc, where story beats fell at weird places as if the story was falling out of tempo with itself. Because of that, this chapter review is probably going to be a bit disjointed but tbh besties i am fighting for my life on this one

I will say at the top of things though that it's darkly funny to me that we're fastforwarding through so much of the B-Komachi tour lol. Offscreen no Ko strikes again!

Honestly, this chapter in general kind of defies any attempt at a beat by beat analysis though that does seem to largely be by design. As the chapter title suggests, this is simply some pagetime spent on letting us stew in what a calm, ordinary day looks like for the twins and for what it is, it's sweet and chill. Taken on its own there isn't really a ton to pick apart, other than just pointing at what moments I found cute which was like 90% of them. I want a 5 chapter mini arc of AQRB goofing around at the grocery store and squabbling over the cooking together.

I also really like that Aqua is the one to suggest doing something nice for Miyako and that he joins Ruby in waiting up for her to get home and see it. It feels like a sweet and warm acknowledgement of the subtle shift in their relationship after 155, with the two of them properly stepping into their roles as parent and child.

As nice as this chapter is though, it does kind of feel like too little too late. One of the major complaints across the series (that I do largely agree with) is that Aqua and Ruby's day-to-day dynamic is for the most part underbaked and that the two of them don't really feel like people who grew up in the same household for 16+ years. I think a few more moments like this properly threaded through the manga would have helped but… well, considering OnK's pacing, do I really want to encourage much more downtime…

Moving on from the things I liked, as cute as this chapter was it's also just kind of weird that so much of it feels like the framing device is a recap episode lol. I guess it isn't the worst idea in the world to have one as we're heading into the final stretch of the story but… well, again, see my point above about weird pacing.

It's also just baffling as fuck to see Ruby frame these events in a way that distinctly did not happen lol. Like, sure, she was definitely having fun doing idol stuff for a lot of it but seeing her so warmly gas up stuff like Tokyo Blade when the anime airing right now is reminding us that Aqua was going through the SpongeBob horror hallway the entire time is so jarring - especially when Aqua (and thus, implicitly, the narrative) agrees with her. I mean, fuck, even putting Aqua aside it's WILD to see Ruby framing "Dig Deep" as having been fun for her when her major contribution to the show was manipulative drama stirring for the purposes of chasing clout that she herself said was having an impact on her mental health. I've criticized the story for the ways Ruby's black hoshigan arc amounted to nothing but there's a special kind of infuriating in seeing it specifically call back to that arc and still fail to actually acknowledge any wrongdoing on Ruby's part.

This is part of a much bigger trend in OnK right now of Ruby being super coddled by the narrative and coming off in some really unpleasant ways as a result. I didn't mention it last chapter but something that's been percolating in my brain since after I wrote my review is just how fucking bonkers Ruby's total non-respose to Mem's situation is. "Oh, you're getting stalked by the press? Sucks to be you, thank god I'm Miyako's special little favourite tho 🙏". Not only is this just kind of a shitty response to begin with but it feels insane coming from a person like Ruby who, you know, saw her mother's life blighted and then ended by this kind of treatment. No concern for Mem, tho!

Idk. I don't want to dislike Ruby but man. A lot of the ways Akasaka has been playing favourites with her lately has the effect of Ruby coming off, in universe, like a deeply self centered and callous person in ways I don't think narrative intends or even realizes and thus fails to interrogate in a satisfying way. But that's a rant for another day. And I'm pretty sure you guys already know what today's rant is gonna be. Which is to say, uh…

HEY. AKASAKA. ARE THEY GONNA TALK ABOUT… ANY OF WHAT HAPPENED IN THE MOVIE ARC?? ANYTHING AT ALL????

This is what I meant when I said this chapter utterly fucking bamboozled me. The way the story has contorted itself into knots to avoid letting Aqua and Ruby have a conversation even when they're literally in the same room is already insane, but giving us an entire chapter of them alone together with ample opportunity to have any sort of meaningful discussion as to the gigantic elephant in the room looming over their relationship and……. literally nothing happens???

This is made even more insanity inducing by the fact that this is, as stated above, more or less a recap chapter and not only does Ruby talk about the movie specifically but we even SEE a flashback to the HikAi kiss…. but not the one Ruby jumpscared him with at the end of 143!!!

What the fuck is even going on anymore? Was it retconned? Resolved offscreen?? Did we collectively hallucinate it??? Is Akasaka gaslighting us????

If nothing else, this chapter has proved to me once and for all that whatever goes on with Aqua and Ruby, that resolution is going to come entirely at the speed of plot, as and when Akasaka decides to do it and not when it would be natural and organic for development to occur. This is an issue that has plagued Aqua and Ruby's r/s from the start, where Akasaka simply refuses to let them communicate, seemingly for the purposes of drawing out the drama rather than because of any narrative justification. So I'm giving on predicting what direction their relationship is going in and what the outcome is going to be. The inner machinations of Aka Akasaka's mind are a mystery to me.

To pre-pick some nits before I leave off… I've seen some people calling this a 'Tanabata chapter' and insisting this is intentional/foreshadowing aquruby end/etc and uh… sorry to be that guy but no it's not lol. Even accounting for the differences in calendars that scatters Tanabata celebrations across July and August, August's Tanabata falls on the 10th this year - and even in the anime world, celebrations across Japan took place on the 'official' date of 7/7. And while there is a Tanabata festival being held in Sendai today… that's just in Sendai, which is all the way up in northern Japan, nowhere near Tokyo where the series is set (and which itself had its Tanabata celebrations on the weekends surrounding 7/7 as per usual.)

There's also just the fact that this chapter… has nothing to do with Tanabata? There's no imagery or iconography and it takes place in the middle of December lol. I simply don't think it was intentional at all on Akasaka's part. It's a cute coincidence, sure, but still just a coincidence.

break next week. i love biweekly manga, oshi no ko.

[bisnes-socks]

alright welcome to my ted talk about the drums on šbj

like when the song first starts and the guitars come in playing the main riff, an experienced listener would expect the drums to make space for the guitars. for the guitars to be the lead in that section and drums to kinda blend in to let the guitar riff shine. so you'd expect a relatively simple beat with a lil closed hi-hat action on the offbeats to make it groove. 

but seriously like i'm no expert, i'm not a drummer, so maybe someone who actually knows drumming very well or understands music theory etc could word this all better, my music education is all from early childhood and/or absorbed from being the child of a musician lmao. but really i'm just a lifetime enthusiastic listener of all music and spent all of covid years watching music analysis videos lmao, okay so like yeah i'm just rambling BUT the choices jure has made on this song are just so unexpected and cool.

but NO!! he plays over the guitars (but the guitars still lead! they still shine!) and the hi-hat is open (could be a different cymbal..? but sounds like an open hi-hat to me, i'll have to find live footage to check how he plays it) so it crashes quite loud and on the beat and then a quick lil pattern on the hi-hat more closed and then bam, open one more time, like it's just super unexpected in a section like that? 

and like. in rock music, hi-hats on the beat are usually on the 1 and the 3. well, if i counted right, he plays it on the 1 and the 3 on the first bar, but the second bar the quick lil pattern syncopates the bar and the second louder open hi-hat is on the 4, a beat later than you'd expect! and then it comes back for the next bar on the 1 and the 3, but then on the last bar of the cycle, it's on the 1, 3 AND 4. which works VERY well with the whine on the guitar. just brilliant composition.

and the hi-hat being open and ringing out the way it does makes the section quite heavy, like it's... stomping. (i think i saw someone else say the song makes them want to kick things and that's probably one of the reasons why. bc it stomps. severely.) while also being very groovy. and that's super cool and odd and amazing. oh and the minor key of the song also emphasises the sort of.. downward feeling of the stomp? but at the same time the whole thing is just.. dancable. that's amazing, that's skill.

and then in the chorus (?) bit (a ja samo čekam...) he's like switching between a more on the beat focused basic type rhythm, but with a very hard rock or even metal inspired naaasty snare drum sound, and then a more groovy beat, the exact one you'd expect in the beginning, where the hi-hat is grooving on the offbeat. like stoooop showing off (never stop).

and then towards the end, when the whole different instrumental section kicks in, i swear that part as a whole gives me like queens of the stone age, them crooked vultures etc. vibes, but the drums in particular, like it's giving dave grohl type energy, like he's going ooooffff. just very purposeful, massive drive, but suuuper tight.

like i've always liked his drumming bc you can tell he can very confidently just sort of ride any beat, easy, decorate it as he pleases, or he can go off with a lot of purpose and drive. and like. he just does all of the above in this one song. amazing.

and like don't get me wrong i could give a ted talk on every instrument on this song (nace i fucking see you i hear you) but jure is my star of the song <3

[akirathedramaqueen]

No better than any royal

It's an analysis regarding classism in Helluva Boss and Blitzø's part in it.

Warning: Apology Tour spoilers. Be advised if you haven't watched the episode yet. And also it's big as hell itself, I am not good in being laconic thing.

I wanted to write a post about the thing which bothered me for some time already, but I wasn't sure how to articulate it properly. Now that the 'Apology Tour' has come out, and we've got another parallel on the same thing, I think I need to grab my shit together and try to analyze this to the best of my abilities.

See, something tingled in me a while ago when I noticed that Fizz, when stating in the 'Oops' episode, "If you think you are superior to anyone, then you are no better than any royal.", was looking at Blitzø the majority of the time. And, of course, he specifically says "neither of you", so... yeah. No doubt he was addressing both Blitzø and Striker.

There is an opinion going around that Striker as a character is designed to be compared to Blitzø. They are both prejudiced towards privileged people (here you can read a wonderful take from @tealvenetianmask on the class rage Blitzø experiences to get deeper into his reasons), with Striker taking it to the extremes as far as killing them with joy, while Blitzø... well, hurting one particular royal in his own way.

Then there's the next person, who says Blitzø's behavior resembles that of Striker, in the "Apology Tour" newest episode.

He says that right after Blitzø throws an accusation that Stolas has just a turn-on for people he looks down on. I like, by the way, how the camera moves up to Stolas, showing their significant physical difference in height and symbolizing their gap in social status.

Which is him, by the way, doubling down on a similar statement in the 'Oops' episode.

I am with you on this one, Fizz :.)

Stolas is very upset about it, and very justly so - Blitzø is putting words in his beak, assuming his mindset, demeaning his feelings, and disrespecting his wishes that he was very clear about. Blitzø means it, unfortunately, and, my take is, he is as much of a classist as the rich assholes like Stella whom he hates for the same very reason.

Just hold on with me for a moment. Look at this.

They are all the same. Stolas is the same.

Blitzø is treating Stolas unfairly based on his social class. Blitzø has a negative opinion of Stolas based on his social class. That's pretty much the definition, although more often than not it's referred to people of lower social status. Still counts in my book.

Don't get me wrong. Stolas is not innocent. He is raised in the privileged world and he takes advantage of it. He is treating his workers unfairly (remember that stressball imp guy?), and this also needs to be addressed... But it does not change the fact that Stolas's genuine feelings got mocked by Blitzø because the latter is so adamant in his superstitions, he does not believe anything the prince says.

And, to add to that, I think Blitzø takes great pride in being the 'I-made-myself' guy, running a successful business they said is rare for an imp. He is insistent in letting everyone know he has a transaction with Stolas, not a relationship. An exchange. A business deal. A fair trade, however stupid and twisted does that sound. He hates privilege, and he is afraid, insecure even, to be associated with it. He does not want to become like them.

And Blitzø, like Fizz said, thinks he is superior to ones who mingle with blue bloods and take from their riches. He thinks he is superior to blue bloods themselves because he earned everything he owns, and they got a birthright to hold onto.

Which, essentially, makes Blitzø no better than any royal.

That does not make him irredeemeable, though. He has plenty of reasons for behaving like that. He suffers every day from injustice. He is at the bottom of the food chain, he has to wait for 5 years to get an appointment for an essential vaccine, he gets ridiculed all the time for just existing. For just being an imp.

Blitzø just needs to understand, that, however privileged Stolas is, he is as fucked by this system as Blitzø is. Stolas had the whole life planned for him, he had no choice even in whom to marry, and he had to put up with years of abuse and trauma to hold an image. He did not have parents and has no friends. He struggles to survive in the environment where people like him are not welcome. He suffers because of the same system as Blitzø does, albeit differently.

I am not trying to compare who has it worse. The only point is that Blitzø is oblivious to the fact that Stolas can get hurt. Physically and emotionally.

Blitzø needs to understand that Stolas is different. Blitzø needs to give Stolas a chance to prove he is wrong. Blitz needs to let their relationship flourish. And through Stolas, he will eventually see that there are probably more royals who are not so horrible as he thinks. That everyone is different regardless of their social status.

As a closing note, I want to say that I wait for Striker's return. I think that there will be a point where they will meet again, but that time Blitzø will mature and prove that he has changed. And no one will dare to say that Blitzø is just like him ever again, which would be a perfect closure for the class conflict.

[familyagrestefanblog]

Sorry, I just need to get this off my chest.

You know what's shit?

That I always come back to work on my explanation posts on why Alya, Plagg, and Emonette being treated unfairly and being disregarded by Maribug's writing is by now pissing me off to similar degrees as her bad treatment of Chat Noir

But that always ends in a domino effect of me putting together more of the overall narrative that ticks me off so much cause my ADD brain can't NOT look for the continuous string of the writing pattern I follow once I'm at it.

You probably can imagine that this isn't very good for my mental health and the only reason why I'm still doing it is because I have a strong suspicion on what the new story arc will do with Cerise after this agonizing hiatus, and only once the actual new story arc proves me wrong can my ADD brain let this emotional investment of 7+ years in my "comfort show" since I was a 16 rest in peace.

Being neurodivergent is exhausting of FUCK...

So I always stop writing any of the posts about the other topics and come back to my Adrichat corner because that's the "safe space" my brain is the most familiar and comfortable with by now since season 4 to make a post AT ALL that isn't running the risk of leading me down 7 new rabbit holes I can't unsee anymore afterwards...

I MISS looking into several narrative threads in this show and voicing my opinions on them. In hindsight, I regret not having done it more when it was still possible, but I feel like it should have been alright in any other normally written show to have a fan blog dedicated to a specific part of the story. I feel like I shouldn't be the one in the WRONG for having done that.

Anyway, I honestly MISS the time where I knew that Maribug's benefit and comfort weren't the only things accepted as "valid" readings of the story. From both sides. Supporters and critics/salters.

Where saying anything that isn't immediately connected to Marinette's benefit and comfort didn't need a full-blown 20 page essay post going into any detail possible to fight for the right to even be taken seriously as a realistic reading of the story at all.

I know I'm not the only one upset at this, but I wonder how many people really realized by now how batshit insane this is right now. That only the most vanilla and vague-ass posts that do their best to not in anyway say something that would be "mean" and "non-validating" to Marinette can be posted now without it automatically being categorized as at least "critical" or running the risk of getting perceived as salt or wishful-thinking.

You can't point ANYTHING out anymore without at least one person running in and either saying "You just HATE Marinette and want to see her punished! You people never care about HERRRRRRRRRR (regarding a topic that isn't about her or is her fucking JOB as a narrative tool to DO)" or "Yeah, nah, the show would never let that happen because of the Marinette bias lol"

You can't even say anything anymore about Adrien's abuse without it being either undermined to all hell because of Marinette having been bullied and needing to be a girlboss who does to others what she's declared "tortured" for, or Félix "hypocrite and victim-blamer" Fathom. Gabriel being abusive was once the most basic ass thing to talk about, what the fuck happened?? (don't answer that, I know the answer...)

The whole analysis' side of this fandom that isn't catering to Marinette was either killed or basically exiled into the "critical" or outright "salt" tag because you can't even be interested in world-building anymore without having to fight for the post's right to be taken seriously under the crushing weight of Marinette's narrative benefits and comfort.

Because mademoiselle ain't fucking interested in ANYTHING lore wise beyond what's convenient for her (not to mention the retcons), so talking about the Guardian and Kwami lore for example counts as SALT now because it automatically implies for people that Marinette isn't all that matters and her flaws of not being interest in ANYTHING might actually COUNT as flaws she should work on. I know, the fucking HORROR! 😱

I MISS writing theories, analysis posts, and speculating about this shows future plots in even the most basic "set up and pay off" manner but I know I can't because my default approach is always complementary to the main character - meaning what challenges them and the narrative the most to grow, expand, and develop. This isn't a Marinette specific thing, I ALWAYS do this.

And contrary to popular belief in this fandom, I get by perfectly fine doing that for the majority of other pieces of media I consume. It is MIRACULOUS and this damn Fandom that now genuinely did it's best to convince themselves that this level of main character centric morality and revenge porn level writing is NORMAL when it's seriously NOT.

There is a REASON why this show hardly ever gets recommended on social media the way one would think despite its success. Or why the Fan backlash is so enormous despite a solid part of the Fandom already having left long ago and the young target demographic not uniformly having a voice in the social media discourse.

Or why people actively advise others AGAINST watching the show, AGAINST forming an emotional investment, and AGAINST going anywhere near the Fandom.

Cause no fucking shit, this isn't normal.

[kusur1uri]

KUSURIURI NSFW HEADCANONS

a/n: this is way too long and was definitely too fun for me to work on. this is the first analysis/writing i’ve done for kusuriuri, so please bear with me as i’m still learning his character. reblogs/interactions mean the world ♡

warnings: nsfw, fem reader, mentions of activities that could be considered dub-con, minor dom-sub dynamics, light degradation, breeding/pregnancy, drugging/aphrodisiacs, please let me know if there’s anything specific you would also like tagged

word count: 1.8k

KUSU’S DISLIKES: general turn-offs, just not really into

kusu is a private man. he does not care for exhibitionism or anything to do with public indecency. the look on your face just before you reach your climax is a sight only he gets to see. while he is private, he’s also very selfish when it comes to you.

roleplay. specifically roleplay in which he’s “exorcising” you. he takes his job very seriously—he’s had a few near death experiences doing it. entertaining the idea of you becoming something he has to vanquish just isn’t something he feels the desire to fantasize about.

threesomes/cuckolding. as mentioned above, he’s a selfish lover. he has no intention of sharing you at your most vulnerable or even allowing another person, man or woman, seeing you in a way only he can. definitely gets jealous if he feels a person is coming off strong towards you, and you remain semi-oblivious to their motives. he has no doubt of your loyalty to him, but he’ll definitely be sure to leave marks on your more visible areas to ward off unwanted attention.

being submissive. now, don’t get me wrong, kusu isn’t opposed to you taking the reigns once in a awhile (see below), but that by no means is equivalent to him submitting. if he deems you’ve had your fun, he’ll simply wrap a firm hand around the column of your throat and your hitched breath is all he needs to know you’ve relinquished your temporary control.

KUSU’S LIKES: loves loves loves

definitely a dom. he can appreciate some soft dom moments, but is typically more apt to being referred to as ‘Master’. let him make all the decisions for you, and he promises you’ll be seeing stars.

for kusu, servicing you is one of his main concerns. how he goes about doing that may come off as mean or teasing most of the time, but he will never let you walk away unsatisfied. seeing you lost in pleasure that he provides is what makes these intimate moments so exciting for him.

not the biggest into pet names, but he can appreciate the effects calling you “angel”, “pretty”, or even “dear” can have. this man knows you’re nothing more than putty in his hands with a few of these words and he relishes in it.

heavily into degradation. but not the hard, insulting stuff. he’s really really into teasing, bullying, and borderline dumbification. one of his favorites is when he sits in front of you and makes you touch yourself while he watches. he’d make a few mocking comments when you moan that your fingers aren’t enough, not like his. but this man is patient. he won’t touch you until you’ve made yourself come at least once—not until he feels the heat of humiliation burn on your skin from his prying eyes and taunting words.

while he enjoys a good tease or some edging with a few demeaning words, he can’t hide the way his cock twitches when he praises you. you become so pliant, so soft when he whispers “i think you can take another, can’t you, pretty girl?”

but his favorite, his cherry on top, is when he combines the two. “my greedy little angel, you think you can take it?” oh he’ll have you begging for him before he even moves an inch. this man’s resilience knows no bounds when it comes to you squirming beneath him.

isn’t opposed to you taking some lead time here and there. he’ll let you make a few commands of him, let you ride his face, and maybe even let you give him a smack or two across his pale cheek. but don’t let that fool you—you are by no means the one in control. if he feels you’re getting too ahead of yourself or forgetting who belongs to who, he’ll have no issue putting you back into your place. but most of the time, he lets you get away with it. his favorite is when you ride him. the soft praises that fall from your lips have his heart clenching and dick throbbing. he can’t get enough of you when you’re like that.

sensory deprivation. tie this man up or have him tie you up—he’s happy either way. maybe add in a blindfold and he’ll be over the moon. he especially loves it when you bound his hands and blindfold him before giving him a handjob or (if you’re feeling playful with your newfound control) a blowjob.

i know i said that he tends to veer away from super hard dom antics, HOWEVER, there’s a part of this man that loves the power imbalance between you and himself. it’s rare, but he can get into the headspace that turns him into an absolute sadist. oh how he loves to see you crying on his cock. the pained expression on your face from the torture of pleasure. he won’t stop until you’re weeping, begging for mercy. and even then, he may only consider giving you a reprieve. but that thought would quickly leave his mind as he feels you clench around him like a vice. he’d lean down to lick a stripe up your bare neck before groaning into your ear, “it seems like you don’t really want me to stop, do you dear?” and after you’d babble out a sentence that was anything but coherent, he’d chuckle lowly, a deep rumble from his throat, and lay a delicate finger upon your swollen and sore clit. “maybe if you cry for me a little louder, I’ll show you mercy.” but you and him both know he won’t stop until you’ve squirted all over his abdomen and left the floor beneath absolutely ruined in a puddle of your release. the first time you and kusu had gone this intense, he had been worried he had overstepped, but when you came back wanting more, he knew he had hearts in his eyes.

kusu knows he’s strong. he’s single-handedly defeated many Mononoke for decades. while he may not show it, the underlying god-complex of this man is overwhelming, but can make for some intense intimate sessions. this is especially apparent on the few occasions you find yourself in the middle of one of his cases. your life is so fragile, one wrong move and your life would be lost in a world he can’t access. and he’ll be sure to remind you of your innate helplessness. compared to your feeble human body, he’s strong. he’ll have you completely powerless against him, paralyzed by his sheer physical power. maybe then you’ll realize he’s the only one able to protect you.

one of kusu’s favorite features on himself is his hands. he uses them for work day in and day out, but not once have you ever seen them in a state of negligence. he keeps them nice and soft, his fingernails even and edges smooth. he loves when he catches you staring at them, sometimes as if in a trance. your eyes follow them as he traces shapes onto your skin, or when he brings them up to delicately wrap around your throat. the heady look in your eyes never fails to make him breathe a little heavier. sometimes, if he’s feeling playful, he’ll even let you suck on two of his fingers while his other hand works at your core.

he never thought much of mirrors in the bedroom, until he met you that is. he never paid them any mind until one day he had you on your knees as he pressed his chest to your back. you had gone quiet for a few moments and when he lifted his face from the crook of your neck, he caught your blissed expression looking at him in the mirror. from that moment on, if you found yourselves staying in a room with a mirror, you knew he’d have you pressed firmly against him as he held you up so you could watch as he rendered you dumb on his cock.

breeding. this man is definitely into breeding and i will die on this hill. he knows everything about female fertility and when you would be at your most fertile window in your monthly cycle. and he would most certainly use this knowledge to ensure he gets you pregnant. he’ll have your knees pressed to your chest as he gives you no reprieve from his long cock making a mess of you. the ground below your back has long since been soaked with both yours and his release, but he shows absolutely no signs of stopping until he’s satisfied that he’s filled you nice and full.

isn’t a big fan of erotic toys. he prefers to do and feel everything himself. however, if he deems it necessary, he will use one as punishment, knowing it won’t be enough to get you to finish. he’ll keep you squirming and frustrated until he feels you’ve begged and apologized sufficiently before he pulls you onto his lap to give you what you really need.

kusu is a medicine seller, so naturally he’s going to have a few run-ins with some top-shelf medicinals. his personal favorites to use on you are the aphrodisiacs and topical warming oils. for his own use, he particularly enjoys relaxants, but prefers to be the sober one as you lose all sense of reality. but don’t worry, he knows just what to do to if you happen to take one too many hits of the aphrodisiacs, everything is well in his oh so capable hands.

kissing. this man loves to kiss you. as soon as you two are alone, you can expect his lips to be on you one way another. he will make out with you until your lips are tender and raw. these make out sessions are almost always messy. he loves the carnal image of his spit on your lips and chin. if you ask nicely, he will spit into your mouth, a predatory glow in his eyes as he watches you swallow what he’s given you. it’s when he’s kissing you that you are most likely to hear the most beautiful moans form him. nip on his bottom lip as he goes to pull away or suck on his tongue and he’ll be moaning breathy little groans into you. he’s also very handsy when he kisses you. whether it’s your ass, waist, hair, or throat, you can expect him to be holding you closely.

he’s possessive too. he’ll suck on your lips, neck, chest. trails of deep red marks will be littered across your most sensitive areas. as i mentioned before, kusu is a very private lover. these marks are his silent way of laying claim to you.

[crowbasils]

What do you think about autistic Basil headcanon?

I made a post about this, I relate to him a lot and I see a lot of his behavioral patterns in me.

YES. i see it!! and i’ve been meaning to talk about the possibility of basil being autistic for quite a while, so, i’ll talk about it here. it’s harder to see it in comparison to sunny’s since he’s most likely masking (which sunny doesn’t really do), but it’s still there!!

(this tweet will kinda be a mess, since it’s not like an analysis analysis. if i’m wrong, please do correct me!)

according to the nhs (https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/signs/children/) signs of autism in older children include:

- not seeming to understand what others are thinking or feeling

- unusual speech, such as repeating phrases and talking ‘at’ others

- liking a strict daily routine and getting very upset if it changes

- having a very keen interest in certain subjects or activities

- getting very upset if you ask them to do something

- finding it hard to make friends or preferring to be on their own

- taking things very literally – for example, they may not understand phrases like "break a leg"

- finding it hard to say how they feel

from what we know about him & from what the duet cutscene says, he was alone for most of his life before meeting the friend group. he also has a line (though said by headspace basil) about this! while that may not necessarily be a sign of autism, it’s what he says next that stands out to me.

“you’ve all taught me so much… how to care for others and how to care for myself too!”

that specific line stands out to me because of how it tells us that basil wasn’t always as caring and cheery as he was as a 12 year old. he learned from his friends—through experience with them, and through observation.

he’s also implied to have a hard time making friends. other than aubrey (who he likely met later in his life rather than in early childhood like sunny and kel), he had no friends before that. how awkward he is in the cutscene where aubrey introduces him to her new-found friend group also implies that he hasn’t had experience with friends. (he also looks like he’s somewhat ‘copying’ aubrey’s smile, just in a more awkward way)

basil most likely has difficulty when it comes to identifying feelings—specifically ones he hasn’t experienced himself. such as the fear of spiders. he doesn’t seem to get that others can fear spiders due to how he doesn’t fear spiders and sees them as a positive instead.

(icon can’t be seen due to my bad internet, but it’s headspace basil. a lot of the headspace basil lines in blackspace and omori route help when it comes to understanding his character better. stranger’s lines help as well :3)

(it should be noted, though, that otherwise, he’s good at reading sunny specifically. may not be a sign of it on itself, but taking into consideration that sunny is also likely autistic, it might be. both of them understand each other despite their childhood different experiences due to it.)

he’s also… pretty bad at articulating and identifying feelings.

“…but the words don’t come out.”

“i don’t know if i should apologize”

“but why does part of of me still cling on?”

the feeling of not knowing if you should apologize or not, the inability to form words and articulating yourself, the feeling of not knowing why you do something… that counts, right?

basil has a very keen interest in plants and flowers. he memorized the symbolism of the flowers that the he assigned to the friend group, and we see plants all over and even outside basil’s house.

he also insists on only taking photos of people when they’re not posing for him and genuinely expressing emotion (which does give the headcanon of him observing expressions and feelings through the photo album a little more merit :3)

from OMORI canon, we know how attached he is to the past and how he dislikes sudden changes. it’s why the photo album exists, it’s why he says “everything will be okay”, it’s why he did what he did. this is something that both sunny and basil have in common!

to me, basil is an autistic person who learned how to mask because he’s afraid to be seen as weird by his friends & others. his relationship with sunny is the only one where he’s able to drop that mask and be “free” in a sense. post-incident basil tries to mask too, but fails at it since he has… a lot more going on his mind.

[btr-rewatch]

Big Time Rush Song Rankings (+ commentary nobody asked for): "BTR"

I was bored. Decided to go through their albums and put them into a list from favorite to least favorite.

"Worldwide": Is it possible this song is overrated and hyped too much? No. This song was on heavy rotation for me from the moment I heard it. Wonderful song, 10/10. Full of love and yearning. Their all white outfits in the music video? Iconic. My mom's friend's daughter went to one of their shows and was picked as the Worldwide Girl, and young me didn't handle that well (I wasn't even AT the concert, so not like I had a chance, but still). I'm almost over it.

"Til I Forget About You": When they would show the music video for this during commercial breaks on Nick, I would leap from the couch and do the dance along with them. There used to be a good analysis post breaking down each of the boys' sections in the song and how it correlates with their personalities in the show and how they deal with heartbreak (there's also one for "Famous" that does the same).

"Big Time Rush": I used to sit on the school bus and stare blankly out the window listening to this one on repeat at like 7:45 in the morning. Just...not even awake yet but psyching myself up to live it big time.

"Famous": This one is pretty much tied with "Big Time Rush" in my head, and I'm tempted to bump it to 3, but the song's theme ultimately wins out. Love this song. Can't help but see it in a weirdly haunting light due to the above mentioned "Famous Analysis" post that I read over and over when I was younger and changed the way I saw the song from that point on. Thank you to Swedish girl-group Play for giving us this song. (I assume most people in the fandom have seen or heard the Play version already but if not, check it out)

"Halfway There": Ok, so. I love this song, but EVERY TIME I listen to it, I'm filled with slight annoyance over the fact that it's the "different" version than was originally released. When this single was released, it was KENDALL who sang the opening lines ("When the chips are down, back against the wall" etc) and then James who did his part later. That's the version I listened to for months before they got rid of it and replaced it with the version that appeared on their album. It was a jarring experience for me, and I've never quite fully recovered. The song will forever sound slightly wrong to me because of it.

"Stuck": Prior to starting this blog and doing the rewatch, I hadn't heard a lot of their songs for years, and I had completely forgotten this one existed. Like, it had been wiped from my brain. Rediscovering it was fun.

"City is Ours": Fun fact-my sister is scarred for life from this song and can no longer listen to it because when she was younger, she used it as her alarm tone to get up for school. It's forever associated with waking up in a panic early in the morning and has been ruined for her since the show's original run.

"This is Our Someday": I feel like this song is one of those forgotten ones. I don't remember it being big either in the show or outside of it back in the day (and it has the second lowest listens on Spotify). I do like it, though. Such a hopeful tune, and the line, "One is good, but four is better?" That's a good one. So true, guys.

"Count on You": This is a sweet one. I LOVE the music video for it in the Jordin Sparks episode. It's just. It's smooth. It feels like silk in my brain, though it's not one of my faves. I especially like how Logan's part, "What would I wanna do that for?" comes right at the "four" mark in their counting. Very nice.

"Big Night": Was never really a fan of this one because something about the way the music is structured bothers me but it's super sing-able, so it gets some props for that.

"I Know You Know": This one was going to be number 12, but it gets a bump up due to the acoustic version from '22 giving me slightly more appreciation for it. My original list didn't even include this song because I totally forgot about it until just now when I was going through the album.

"Oh Yeah": Not much to say about this one. I didn't really listen to it when I was younger because it was a "James song" and he was my least favorite of the guys singing-wise. (I am SORRY James stans) Love the spinning Logan head in the music video, though. I remember the fandom really enjoying that part.

"Nothing Even Matters": I simply don't have feelings about this song one way or another. It's just there.

"Any Kind of Guy": I have bizarre issues with this song. Gives me sensations of unpleasant colors and patterns. Zig-zaggy and burnt orange and brown. Bleh. Last place for "Any Kind of Guy." I think the silly music video with all the costumes didn't help.

[chnt-confessions]

i think i'm the only person in the entire fandom that has any genuine empathy for elijah, and i'm stuck thinking there's something deeply wrong with me for that. i feel like quite a lot of people split black on him (and joshua) and then split white on jedidiah, and sydney. the ONLY two options are to dehumanize or objectify him. no hate to jedidiah-likers, but jedidiah is not a victim. he doesn't act entirely the way he does because of trauma, he acts that way because he implicitly looks down on sydney. what kind of man jeopardizes the entire world for a man that he let gravely sick in the first place, only to gaslight and neglect him?? all this because of mommy and daddy issues that, like, 70% of the population has?? i had to headcanon extra issues and trauma for him to just to keep myself sane. i don't mean to invalidate his trauma, but he has lived such a privileged life and can easily go to therapy and yet. i'm sorry but it's bojack-horseman levels of "how tf do you expect me to feel bad for you? lmao." like, i need him to get better because people will likely die if he gets any worse, but other than i couldn't care less about this guy. i'm way more sympathetic to sydney because he's trying his best but he seems to have an empathy deficiency of some kind (it's not his fault but it is painfully obvious sometimes and i wish i could fix him but i have to fix myself first because i also deal with this); i also relate to the "feeling unlovable" aspect of things.

we have only seen elijah at his worst. the elephant man is elijah "mental breakdown, 2 years and counting psychotic episode" core; did everyone just assume he was born like that? and if he was, that would also make me sad tbh. he had a similar upbringing to jedidiah and yet he does not show it at all and i'm wondering what tf was different. he also generally sucks at being a villain sometimes (i.e. telling sydney his weakness, letting sydney go back to jedidiah, reacting way better than most people would when sydney told him that he couldn't get the journals). when jedidiah says "sydney, you're always fine." vs when elijah says it; jedidiah said it to gaslight sydney and because he feels bitter about the fact he's working so hard to keep sydney alive and can't use it to manipulate him (i'm joking but i'm also not joking), while elijah was just being a little acolyte and also he's symbolically the earth, so when he says the earth will catch him when he falls, he is fr. idk what snapped in him with the murder-suicide thing but considering that he is the earth, and unfortunately due to sydney's weird little mind and jedidiah's horribleness, the earth is, like, post-apocalyptic now so it probably has something to do with that (idk why he switched from stabbing to burning alive; probably cuz of the theatrics/j). anyway, he does suck and he needs to go back to russia and never come back for everyone's good, but i really do think he would be better than jedidiah could ever be (yes, even with therapy; i'm literally speaking facts/hj) if "everyday [wasn't] a living fucking nightmare." and i'm constantly like "._." whenever i remember that jedidiah is the reason "everyday is a living fucking nightmare." also i really wanna see someone do elijah/the elephant man analysis/interpretation that doesn't reek of disgust and hatred (or lust; do whatever you want, but i'm judging you rn), just for variety tbh. here is his official playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/389N5sUULTXFC63I3CSn7c?si=756dacaa18cd491c some of the songs in here are, like, "???" and i want to see someone's else's take on them (even elijah haters tbh) sorry for the essay, that's all i wanted to say :)

also im so happy that i can say this anonymously, thank you chnt-confessions for doing god's work, i love you platonically <3

(ABOUT THE LAST PART) no need to apologize and I'm really glad to make you happy!!

[driftward]

gentle comforting sex (Nyx and the most handsomest, specialist Nuhn in their life ((U'rahn, in case he wasn't transparent enough))

Answer behind the readmore

~*~ U'rahn was moping.

This was unusual for him, and so Nyx watched from her spot in the rafters as he slouched around his home, slung his clothes sullenly in a pile, stared out the window with his arms crossed for a while (about six seconds which was pretty long for him) and by the time he got to the point where he was sulking in the bath they decided to drop from the ceiling.

He did not even startle as he just looked up at her, ears down, face pouty.

"Oh. Hello, Nyx."

"Rahn."

Nyx unhooked their boots and set them to one side before beginning to peel off their jumpsuit. "You are upset."

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Is this because of your continued failure in the Crystalline Conflict team against that one specific team with the Tia who keeps taunting you?"

"I said I don't wanna talk about it."

Their jumpsuit draped on a chair, Nyx walked to stand next to the bathtub.

"Please lean forward, Rahn."

He paused only for a moment before acquiescing, and Nyx slid into the water behind him. Deft fingers began to press into him, a slight hum as they vibrated against sore muscles, and into tender spots. He could feel the cold trickle of healing aether teasing into him.

He wasn't hurt, of course. But win or lose, the Crystalline Conflict did require a lot of physical exertion from its participants. He sagged into their touch.

"It's just - it's just!" His tail thrashed energetically, splashing water back and forth. "I'm a Nuhn! Why does he keep calling me U'rahn Tia!?"

"He also calls you a 'loserrr'." said Nyx, unhelpfully.

"Yeah but like I am a herrro. That's different."

"Different how? You are also a Nuhn. Vauban was very particular about making sure you updated the forms correctly, and U'odh signed off on them."

"Well. It's just. I dunno."

U'rahn sunk lower into the bath until just his ears were showing, bubbles coming up from beneath the surface of the water. Nyx continued to rub their hands over him, applying rejuvenating energy to pressure points and massaging his muscles. They let them stay under for a count of twenty before reaching down and pulling him back up to a sitting position.

He coughed and rubbed his eyes, spluttering.

"I was fine!"

"Asphyxiation is one of the tactics that is lethal to you."

"I can hold my breath plenty long!"

"You were only doing so to avoid talking. I can only surmise it is because you have difficulty stopping yourself from doing so."

U'rahn crossed his arms and sulked as Nyx pressed themself against his back, tracing both hands down an arm until pressing a thumb into his palm, then leaning over to repeat the action to the other arm.

"Ugh! He just runs around every match and keeps... keeps repeating telling everyone I'm only a Tia!"

"You know this to be deception."

"Yeah well I just wish he'd shut up."

"Perhaps if you focused on winning the match and did not allow yourself to be distracted by his taunting, he would stop making the attempt."

U'rahn groaned. And then he moaned, softly, as Nyx's fingers moved to find a particular tense spot near his lower spine.

"It's like - when people call you a Miqo'te! You having to correct them all the time. Doesn't that get old?"

"No. That is not deception, merely misunderstanding. I do look like a Miqo'te. I correct them."

"What if someone didn't listen and kept calling you a Miqo'te even though you aren't, huh? What would you do??"

"I offer corrections once to everyone. If they are someone in one of my social cloisters, I will periodically re-correct them. If someone insists on being wrong, that is fine. The deception serves no purpose."

U'rahn just made a miserable whimpering noise.

"I believe that in a situation of this difficulty Vauban would recommend a course of root cause analysis. The deception is transparent, so I doubt that is the source of the problem. Consider. If it is not the deception, then what about the lie bothers you so much?"

U'rahn leaned forward more, and Nyx pressed their thumbs into the muscles at the base of their tail. He sagged, and then he slid away from Nyx, feet first, tilting back until only his ears were above the water, and judging from the burbling noises that went with the bubbles, said something.

Nyx waited for another count of twenty before pulling him back up.

"Please repeat that, Rahn."

"Maybe he's right."

He collapsed, going boneless, but Nyx stoically kept his head above water, hardly shifting in response to the change in how he was holding his weight.

"I do not understand. You are recognised as the Nuhn of the Drake tribe, both according to internal tribe strictures and external records keeping."

"Y e a h... but... I haven't done my duty yet. I haven't gone back and, uhm, well, you know..."

He fidgeted, sending water sloshing.

"I know what sex is, Rahn."

"Yeah! That!"

"You know what sex is, Rahn."

His ears dropped.

"This seems like a problem with a simple solution, Rahn."

He didn't respond.

"It is difficult to get me to all of your extremities while we are in the bath. Please get out, Rahn."

"...okay."

Rahn slung himself out of the bath, and Nyx was quick to follow. They took the towel before he could get to it, and alternated patting him down and drying themself off. With themselves, they were quick, efficient. With Rahn, they were slow, languid, hands chasing contours, firm fingers finding difficult spots.

Rahn could not help but feel a bit better at their attention. Arms and shoulders, then toes and calves. Chest and abs, then thighs. And then, he sucked in his breath, as they approached his midsection. One hand was definitely spending more time than necessary on his ass, while another-

"Hey hey! What are we doing?"

Nyx locked to stillness. "Do you wish to stop?"

"N-no..."

Their hand was firm on his ass, even as their fingers were clever with his cock. He gulped, again, and looked at the ceiling as he came to attention.

"I have an idea."

"Wh-what's that?" Rahn struggled to say.

"If you do not feel you a Nuhn yet, perhaps we might practice at it."

"What? I mean, uhm, sure, but I don't know what you mean. Do you want to go... babysitting with me or something?"

Nyx placed a hand on his chest, dropping the towel, and pushing themself right up against him.

"Demonstrate you are a Nuhn by having sex with me, Rahn."

"Oh."

Their other hand stroked his cock languidly.

"Here!?"

"Where else?"

"I don't know! A bed? There's a bed in the next room!"

"Very well. Lead the way."

"O-oh. Sure. Right."

Rahn rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, but then after a moment, took Nyx's hand, and led them to the bedroom. He stopped once they got there, and stared down at it, uncertain of where to go next.

Nyx, fortunately, took lead. They laid down on their back on the bed, spread their legs, and looked over at Rahn, while crooking their fingers at him in a 'come here' gesture.

"Are you sure I'm not-"

"We have had this discussion many times, Rahn."

"I'm just - I'm just -"

"Nervous. I am aware. Come here. Hold my hands."

Rahn shuffled forward, and did as he was told, reaching out, and grasping Nyx's hands.

They stared at him.

They were always staring, though, so Rahn was not sure that meant anything. They pulled him closer, and he obliged, until he was nestled between their legs, their bodies in close contact. He swallowed again, nervously, as Nyx let go of his hands. One hand reached up to grab the back of his neck, pull him down, and kiss him. The other angled him right at their entrance, and with a movement of their hips, he slid in.

Rahn let out a muffled, surprised noise, but Nyx just held him in place. Still, now that he was in. Their legs wrapped around his hips, as their arms wrapped around him, and their hands rubbed deep into his back. They broke the kiss, and just stared at him intently.

It was oddly comforting. Just... a stillness between their bodies. Nyx was warm, now, and Rahn was on top of her, and it was comfortable. The heat radiating through his body. Warm hands against tight muscles.

"Are you okay like this, Rahn?"

"Y-yeah. Yeah. Yeah!"

One hand reached up to touch his ear, fingers massaging it, as Nyx leaned their head back, and closed their eyes. They relaxed their grip on him.

"Then do your duty, Nuhn."

Rahn's breath shuddered. He suddenly felt very enthusiastic about this. Nyx seemed fitted exactly to him, as he began to buck his hips into them. Nyx tilted their head back, eyes still closed, neck open, and they seemed so giving, so open. They were his everything, and he bits his lip and moaned as he thrust into them. Their hands never stopped. They seemed to have a preternatural sense for finding the tense spots, still pressing fingers hard into muscles, gripping tight in all the right places, until at last Rahn came, exploding into Nyx, panting hotly.

He tried to hold himself up. Nyx would not let him, as their arms were around him again, and gripping, and they were suddenly quite heavy, forcing him flat.

"Deep breaths. Eyes closed. Focus on sensation." they commanded, and he listened, he listened as they continued to rub his body, arms and legs and even their tail, until at last he realised he had calmed down.

"Do you feel better?"

"Y-y-yeah. I think so."

"Good. You may stay as long as you like. You may also continue complaining, if you wish."

Rahn considered, thoughts now sluggish, headache gone, relaxed.

"I think I'm good," he said.

"Good."