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servin-up-surveys · 2 years ago

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survey #119

What are some tropes/settings/concepts that you like in horror movies/books? Uh I tend to like paranormal movies. I like a lot of horror stuff though, but right now I'm really not in the mood to like dig through my brain listing everything that comes to mind. One thing I do wanna mention though is I LOVE well-written villains that have like, a reason behind their evil.

Are there any objects that you own because of what they are rather than what you use them for? (For example, having a piano to have a piano rather than to play it or having an Eames chair because it is an Eames chair, etc.) No, that seems pretty dumb and pridefully materialistic.

Who do you tend to compare yourself to most often? Is it someone in your life, someone online, or some composite idea of a person? My two immediate sisters, the ones I grew up with and have been regularly involved with my whole life. I 100% feel like that hydra dragon drawing where two look serious and powerful and then there's the derp one/me lmao. I constantly feel like they're both embarrassed by me and since we were raised in the exact same environment and all, I have a hard time understanding why I turned out so different from them in terms of being an adequate, capable adult.

Stripes or polka dots? Polka dots, I just like circles.

Do you care if people touch you when they’re talking to you? This depends on a lot. How close are we, and how exactly are you touching me? As a base rule if we're not at least somewhat close, just simply don't touch me unless it's like, a hug that you have permission to give.

What is your gender? Do you think that people think it's obvious? As the previous survey taker answered, gender isn't always an obvious thing, first and foremost. However, in the traditional sense of how people visualize a woman, I think it is. I've never been misgendered, so.

How long did your first date last? A few hours. We saw a movie and had lunch.

Highlight of your day? Girt meeting my sister's EXTREMELY affectionate dog Oakley and them totally falling in love with each other, oh my god they were both so happy. Girt had wanted to meet her for a loooong time now because she's like 100% his kind of dog, but the one time he'd already been here since they got Oakley, she had to stay locked in Ash and Nick's bedroom because of a party guest being terrified of her (she's not aggressive, just VERY big and insanely pushy).

Is everything working in your house? Uhhh I believe so, yes. Well no, we do have a broken PS2 right now, but Girt wants us to keep it stored in case our working one breaks because he's confident he can fix the other one with the right stuff.

Does pop give you energy? When I had caffeine extremely regularly, it did nothing for me energy-wise, but since drinking soda way less, I think it tends to, at least usually.

TV show you love with a passion? Meerkat Manor.

Do you think you learned anything from the worst night of your life? Yes. Never, ever, fucking ever allow yourself to be 100% certain that a person won't just drop you like a boulder and bolt, I don't care what your connection to the person is.

Is it safe to say you own over 20 pairs of shoes? Holy fuck, no. I don't think I even have 10.

Last time you went to 7-eleven? Never, I think. They're not really a thing here, or at least they weren't; one recently opened very near to us, but we've never been there.

A fast food restaurant that you hate with a passion? Arby's is absolutely disgusting. Burger King has also never impressed me.

Does everyone in your family have a job? Me nor Mom do. I mean, my mom does clean the church she attends, but she is no longer paid because if she was, she'd be taken off disability, which simply can't happen if we want a house to live in and groceries in the kitchen. It's not a stable source of income anyway because it's taxing on her, the church is extremely poor so can't pay her much anyway, and with her health she needs to be able to stop the moment she feels she really needs to.

Going anywhere this weekend? I don't have anything planned other than take my old Nikon camera and Nikon supplies to the place I sold my flute and guitar (for a GRAND TOTAL of like $45 btw lmao) hopefully tomorrow, and I want that to be it, really. I'm extremely sleep-deprived and just stressed and want to be a hermit.

What does it mean when you're being quiet? It can mean almost anything, really. Including nothing at all, considering I'm generally quiet anyway.

Last person you had a face-to-face conversation with? My mom.

How late did you stay up last night? At LEAST 1:30 AM, I think 2, and not willingly. I struggled so badly to fall asleep last night, I literally just laid there for fucking hours.

How many times have you been in love? Twice. I once thought thrice, but no, I was not in love with Sara now that I've actually been in love with Girt and been able to compare the sensation to how I was with Jason. I know I loved Sara, but it was not the same as Jason and Girt.

How many years older than you would you date someone? It would be very, very hard for me to go older than nine years, and even that I really wouldn't want unless I was crazy for the person, basically. I think like, 4-ish years older is the last number where an age difference wouldn't bother me at all.

What was the last thing you pinky swore on? Something with Girt, I'm sure, probably relating to my shitty self-confidence in some way. I feel like the last thing was when he initiated it about not finding me unattractive, because he knows I'm very convinced (NOT by his own behavior, I want to emphasize, this is all on me and my own head) he's not attracted to me.

Are there a lot of mirrors in your house? Definitely no more than what's normal.

About how old was the last person that hit on you? He's 29.

What color are your headphones? This pair of earplugs is white.

Is the fan on? No, this house is always fucking freezing these days and Mom is very, very reluctant to turn on the heat because money.

Any special reason why you’re taking this survey? I haven't taken one in a VERY surprising amount of time for me and I also just want to do something while I listen to music.

Your friend needs you to run to the store to get a pregnancy test. Do you? Uh I don't drive, and there's also nobody in my face-to-face life who would ask me that anyway because they know I don't, AND I'm not ~that~ close to any of my friends here. I would if I COULD, though.

Do you like the opposite sex to be dominant or you the one in control? I am the most sub bitch you'll ever fuckin MEET lmfao, HOWEVER this is primarily only sexually and if my boyfriend was acting domineeringly as a life partner and person as a whole, I'd be so fucking gone, no partner is ever allowed to boss me around.

If I asked you to point to Ohio on a map of the US do you think you could? Yeah, it's a state with a relatively recognizable shape and I have family there anyway.

[TW: EATING DISORDER] Do you eat a lot of food? No, these days I eat way too little. In therapy yesterday I did open up about how I'm developing eating disorder-ish thoughts (at least I think so, I've never actually had one) and cried a whole lot about it, and with my mom present we decided that once I see this endocrinologist next month, we're going to try to get me refered to a dietitian to help me with pre-diabetes management, weight loss, and just in general building a healthier relationship with food.

Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship? No.

Have you ever had to give someone directions before? Hell no, I would get that person NOWHERE. I don't know street names, interstate numbers, how many miles are between here and there, ANYTHING that would really help with directions.

Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? No, that's PURE panic attack material for me lmao. I couldn't do that.

When was the last time you held someone’s hand? Uhhhh a few days ago when Girt was here, I don't think we did today. Maybe we did, but I don't remember it.

What is your favorite Disney movie of all time? The Lion King.

Which room of your house/apartment do you spend the most time in? This spare room where my desk/laptop is.

Which insect do you find the most beautiful? Butterflies and moths. Some praying mantises are also just pure stunning and so intricate.

Is there a substance you avoid at all costs? If so, what is it and why? I will never, ever put beer in my mouth because that was what my dad always drank as an alcoholic. The mere smell makes me want to hurl. I also will never, ever do hard drugs like cocaine or meth 'n' shit, I will liiiiiiiiterally die before I fuck with that kind of stuff. Lastly, I am very, VERY doubtful I could ever swallow an Alka-Seltzer Plus pill, because that's the cold medication I ODed on. I shit you not, seeing the fucking logo of the brand ignites massive anxiety in me.

Is there a place that you might call your second home? Dad and Kim's house, I guess. I'm pretty much totally comfortable in Ashley's house, too.

Is there a piece of jewelry that you feel naked without? My vertical labret lip piercing.

What’s the sweetest thing someone’s done for you? Never, ever gave up on me and was there for me when he had zero obligation to be. I get way too emotional when I think of what Girt's done for me, both before we dated and now that we do.

Which wild animals are a common sight in your area? Birds obviously, then gray squirrels. Opossums and raccoons are the main roadkill here, but you don't like, regularly see them out and about and such. There are rabbits and (primarily) whitetail deer too, but they're of course shy and bolty. VERY rarely you'll see a fox; I think I've only seen one alive in my entire life, though.

Do you recognize friends’/family’s vehicles by sound? Nobody super easily that is still in my life, but I can usually know when Girt is outside because I'll hear music. Defending him immediately, he's not an asshole that blares it, but it's still loud enough for me to hear in the living room, which is where I usually sit and wait when I know he's almost here.

What was the last thing that stressed you out or upset you? Me just being a bad aunt.

Do you wish people would forgive you for your past so you could move on? So uh, I'M the one that fucking desperately needs to forgive my past lmao

Who was your first roommate? Technically my younger sister. Uh, I think. I don't believe I ever shared a room with my older sister...

Do you have a sibling who looks like you? Ashley, Nicole, and I are obviously sisters, according to basically everyone. I do stand more clearly apart from them, though; people regularly think Ash and Nicole are twins.

[TW: CHILD/PREGNANCY LOSS] Name three women you know who have lost a child. My mom's mom lost a whole lot, my former best friend Colleen had a miscarriage, and an acquaintance I have that I've done pictures for also has experienced one.

Which nationalities have you been told you look like? (i.e., Asian, Irish) I mean, I've just heard American, which is what I am.

What book are you currently reading? Wings of Fire: Talons of Power. I'm being super slow at reading this one... Not because it's not good or anything, I'm into it, I've just been bad with reading.

Have you ever received any scary, threatening messages on social media? Yes.

Who was your first kiss? First person who kissed me was one of two boys that endlessly harassed me in pre-k, but I absolutely don't consider that my "first kiss." I'll always consider it Jason.

Who are three of your favorite YouTubers to watch? Game Grumps, John Wolfe, and I've been having a jacksepticeye streak.

What do you miss about high school? Seeing friends regularly. Being confident in my future.

What color was your first car? I haven't had my own personal car.

What color was the house you grew up in? Primarily red brick.

Growing up, what floor was your bedroom on? I've only ever lived in houses with just one floor.

Does your bedroom have carpet? Yeah.

What are the top three travel destinations on your bucket list? South Africa, Alaska, Germany. Last two are pretty interchangeable with rank.

Do you get heartburn? I am on a prescription antacid because without it I have heartburn so extremely severe that it nearly makes me want to cry, like my throat will be PURE fucking acid fire. I'll sometimes feel it if I miss literally just a single day's dose. On the bright side I have learned via weight gain -> loss -> then gain again that it's absolutely weight-related, and I'm confident if I lose enough again it'll improve, if not totally stop.

What are three things you are known for on social media? Uh I guess primarily a photographer since I have the most socials for that purpose, and uh... I don't really think I'm even remotely noteworthy online in another way.

What is your Instagram account name? I have three haha; I'm not sharing my personal openly, but brittanymphotography is my basic photography account, and eldritch_obscura is roadkill/vulture culture-y photos.

Have you ever used Snapchat? No, that is NOT the app for someone who hates taking pictures of themselves lmao

Did you want to be famous when you were younger? Kinda like middle-high school transition/some of freshman year I kinda wanted to be an electric guitarist.

First celebrity you were obsessed with? Steve Irwin.

First celebrity crush? I was a Jesse McCartney bitch y'all

What was something unique about you as a kid? Uh... nothing exceedingly unique, but my writing abilities were raved over from a pretty damn young age by my teachers.

Were you ever goth/emo? Oh I was totally an emo teenager haha, and as an adult I'm 200% goth at heart lol, I'm just too poor as well as lazy for the outward appearance.

Do you want any more piercings? Oh yeah, quite a lot more.

#survey #surveys #personal questions #random questions

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izvmimi · 2 years ago

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FMK — Ushijima who tells you that he's nutting in a robotic monotone voice, Izuku who makes gorilla noises when he nuts, and Baji who straight up barks and howls to the moon when he busts

gorilla noises fajksd;ljfasldfa;sdf;alsdfl;asdlfjsdakflajs;dkfl;jas;dlfjasd;fa

PLEASE

this ask gave me such a serious headache i am crying

fuck

help

i'm having an actual mental breakdown

ok ok ok ok

m izuku :( but only cuz i'd sound worse tbh

f ushijima cuz i think i could tolerate that exactly once.

k baji cuz i like my eardrums

#mimi replies #treasures: kiki #this is so rude are we beefing?#is this personal?#do you want to meet me behind an arby's?#i'll bring drinks and we can have a picnic behind the dumpster

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japansace · 7 years ago

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I was tagged by @nihonlove~!

last movie you watched: I watched this old rom-com with my mom called Two Weeks Notice. It was... not awful, per se, but ya know. There was a baffling ten seconds of Trump in it though, so that’s a major strike against it. (Even so, one particular scene in it did slay me, I must admit.)

last song you listened to: “Finesse” by Bruno Mars and Cardi B.

last book you read: I haven’t finished it yet, but I started reading John Green’s latest book, Turtles All the Way Down. I know admitting you like John Green is like a serious offense on Tumblr, but I really did enjoy his work back when I was in middle school/high school. So far, this book seems a little underwhelming, but then again, like I said, I haven’t finished it.

last thing you ate: I just had a plate of french fries, ‘cause what even is impulse control?

if you could be anywhere right now, where would you be? Exactly where I am--but being more productive. I feel really lazy right now.

where would you time travel to? I rather not touch time travel at all, really.

fictional character you’d hang out with for a day? I’d wanna tell Yuuri Katsuki how proud I am of him.

This isn’t a writing thing, so I’ll take the opportunity to tag people I don’t usually tag (and a couple of the regular suspects, of course):

@eternalsunshine13, @postingpebbles, @crossroadswrite, @thehobbem, @shemakesmeforget, @lozeyart, @theguardianknux, @annzy-bananzys-corner, @miniejj, @timeisnotrelative, @nightmorph119-5

#tag meme #yeah i tagged people i went to high school with fuckin' fight me about it #meet me behind the abandoned Arby's by our school (you know the one) and we'll tussle #(i'm just kidding but do the meme if you want~)#nothing abbnormal here

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mostlysignssomeportents · 3 years ago

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Your mom is a tech ninja

What makes someone “good at technology?” In part, it’s an understanding of the underlying technical principles and industry conventions — what a “power on” icon looks like, say. I have a lot of that. But there’s another component, one that’s often invisible to people like me: the extent to which your technology was designed to suit your needs.

I have a lot of that, too. I’m a 50 year old, middle-class, tech-industry adjacent professional man with an honorary PhD in computer science. Not only do tech designers think like and about me when they create new products — they often ask me what I think I need.

Several times per year, I’ll get on a call with product managers and researchers at both big and small tech companies to discuss some planned product. I am good at tech, but tech is also good at me. It doesn’t just meet me halfway — it bends over backwards to meet my needs.

Some years ago, I joined the advisory board for Simply Secure, a nonprofit that helps tech designers build strong security tools that are intended to be usable by non-technical people.

https://simplysecure.org/

In my first call with the org’s founder, Meredith Whittaker, I suggested a slogan for the products we helped with: “So easy, even your boss can use them.” You see, I’ve been an IT manager, and in that rule, I’ve had to institute security policies, like minimum standards for passwords, mandatory VPN usage, and other important (but often cumbersome) measures.

In these circumstances, I always did my best to explain to my co-workers that these measures were not me being high-handed or sadistic, loading them up with pointless busywork. I tried really hard — with pretty good success — to convey the rationale behind these measures and the risk I was trying to mitigate.

This isn’t just a matter of being respectful to the people I was working to protect, it was also key to that protection — when people don’t accept security measures, they circumvent them. As this amazing ethnography of security-bypassing medical professionals puts it, “You Want My Password or a Dead Patient?”

https://www.cs.dartmouth.edu/~sws/pubs/ksbk15-draft.pdf

It’s really important to get rank-and-file workers to understand why you’re asking them to endure the inconvenience of a security measure, but it’s far more important to get your boss to understand this. After all, even if your co-workers don’t buy in, you have some authority to mandate their cooperation, whereas your boss gets to override you.

Everyone who’s worked in security has had experience with this: you get a call from the CEO like, “Look, Poindexter, I don’t give a monkey’s asshole about the VPN or whatever. I need to download a presentation to raise the capital to pay your salary, and as soon as the kid in the lobby of this Comfort Inn is done Reddit shitposting on the shared lobby iMac, I need to download that file to this USB stick I found in the parking lot of an Arby’s and transfer it to my laptop. Make it happen!”

This is why I suggested “So easy your boss can use it,” as a replacement for the odious “So easy your mom can use it.” Bosses have the social clout to force the universe to rearrange itself to your comfort.

Moms, not so much.

Tech designers are notoriously indifferent to the needs of moms — and other marginalized users — when they plan their products. The emblem of this was the Honeywell Kitchen Computer, a $10,600 recipe-organzing database system the size of a kitchen counter, offered for sale in the 1969 Nieman-Marcus Christmas catalog:

https://www.wired.com/2012/11/kitchen-computer/

The men who designed this computer didn’t ask their wives — whose nightly dinner-cooking duties they set out to automate — whether they needed a $10,000, 100lb recipe organizer that you queried by punched paper tape. Not one unit sold.

Everything your mom does with a computer is twice as hard as the things that I do with a computer. Even if your mom gets more consideration from product designers today than she did in 1969, I’m getting more consideration. When I use a computer, I’m playing the game of life on the lowest difficulty setting:

https://whatever.scalzi.com/2022/05/18/straight-white-male-the-lowest-difficulty-setting-ten-years-on/

But as easy as things are for me, they’re even easier for your boss, who doesn’t just play on the lowest setting — your boss gets to play in God Mode. They get highest-level access to company systems and they get to ignore the security policies their underlings must obey.

Hence IFL Science’s study of CEO passwords for Nordpass, which found that the median CEO uses a password that is “startlingly dumb,” in the phraseology of the headline for PC Gamer’s article on the study, by Katie Wickens:

https://www.pcgamer.com/the-passwords-most-used-by-ceos-are-startlingly-dumb/

The study analyzed 290 million data-breaches and clustered the leaked passwords by job title, finding that the most popular passwords for the highest-ranking employees were typical of the worst password choices: “123456,” “picture1,” “password,” and names like “Tiffany,” as well as mythological animals like “Dragon.”

These passwords aren’t worse than the median breached password, but they should be better. With great power comes great responsibility, after all. C-Suite Impersonations are extremely dangerous to companies — forged emails from top execs have led to millions of losses at a swoop, when the impersonator orders an underling to transfer millions to pay a bogus invoice.

https://www.batesgroup.com/publications/joic-02-2017-0001.pdf

It’s a safe bet that the IT managers who work for these execs know about the risk of C-Suite account takeovers, and it’s a sure bet that the execs who chose these bad passwords had heard advice about choosing strong passwords. But unlike your mom, your boss gets to overrule IT policies.

Passwords suck and they’re hard to do well. You (and your mom, and your boss) should be using a password manager and using a different, strong, randomly generated password for every service.

https://www.eff.org/dice

You should also turn on two-factor authentication for every service, using either a hardware token or a standalone 2FA app (not SMS!):

https://ssd.eff.org/en/module/how-enable-two-factor-authentication

Meanwhile, let’s normalize saying, “So easy my boss can use it” and banish “so easy my mom can use it” to the scrapheap of history.

[Image ID: The 1969 Nieman-Marcus Christmas Catalog listing for the Honeywell Kitchen Computer. The ad copy reads, 'If she can only cook as well as Honeywell can compute. Her souffles are supreme, her meal planning a challenge? She's what the Honeywell people had in mind when they devised our Kitchen Computer. She'll learn to program it with a cross-reference to her favorite recipes by N-M's own Helen Corbitt. Then by simply pushing a few buttons obtain a complete menu organized around the entree. And if she pales at reckoning her lunch tab, she can program it to balance the family checkbook. 84A 10,600.00 complete with two week programming course 84B Fed with Corbitt data: the original Helen Corbitt cook-book with over 1,000 recipes 5.00 (.75) 84C Her Potluck, 375 of our famed Zodiac restaurant's best kept secret recipes 3.95 (.75) Epicure 84D Her tabard apron. one-size, ours alone by Garden House in multi-pastel provincial cotton 28.00 (.90) Trophy Room.]

#pluralistic

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queer-coded-camaro-driver · 3 years ago

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I have a lot of opinions about your post about st4 feeling off so I had to inbox you lmao

I agree with pretty much all of what you said!! And I feel like the not wanting to watch the entire episodes (cause I felt the exact same way) also in person had to do with them being so SO long. Like normally when the episodes a bit slow it doesn’t matter cause the whole things only 45 minutes tops but these episodes seemed to just drag on at certain points and with the season being split up the way it is there seemed to be little to no payoff.

I have hated that ever since season two ST has began splitting up the group more and more each season and as much as I love Joyce hopper and Murray their characters are stronger when interacting with the kids and I had high expectations for the Hopper in Russia parts and felt kind of let down with how it mostly just felt like a regular old pow story and had very little upside down elements until fighting the demo dogs at the end it almost just didn’t feel like stranger things and the only thing that saved the Murray Joyce parts imo is their comedic chemistry idk it felt very disconnected from the actual show

And yeah!!! The marketing made it seem at least to me that billy despite being dead was gonna be a big player this season but the only person he ever impacted was max and the rest pretended he didn’t exist!! And the duffer brothers rlly fumbled the bag with Dacre he’s such an amazing actor and has chemistry with anyone who he’s put on screen with he’s rlly a show stopper when it comes to acting and made such a huge mark on the show the past two seasons it felt off not having him in this one

YES!!! You get me.

I'm just finishing up my MA in English and this season made my degree fucking vibrate with anger. There were so many good opportunities for character growth, for the group to get closer, and for everyone to find some sort of happiness... but that would be too easy.

I'm so tired of all these shows just compounding trauma on their characters without providing any sort of emotional out for the audience. I feel like I just keep getting hit with harder and harder situations and the humorous moments aren't enough to make up for it anymore.

And, not to be Harringrove trash, but getting Steve and Nancy back together makes ZERO sense after the breakup they had. They don't even have to make Billy/Steve canon, just please don't revert to shitty "first love" tropes to keep your queer fans at bay.

Plus Jonathan is WAY more responsible and compassionate than they depicted him this season, and the inclusion of Eddie was cool but would have been way more fun if Billy was also there.

Let traumatized, queer-coded villains have some redemption. Let the metalhead boys learn to vibe together. Billy can teach Eddie not to be a coward and Eddie can help Billy chill the fuck out sometimes. And BOTH OF THEM can help protect Steve and the kids during their Upside Down shit.

I just... Season 4 made very little narrative sense. The Duffer bros and Netflix's CEO are welcome to meet me behind the nearest Arby's cause it's fisticuffs time.

#thank you #this was wonderful #let's be pals #stranger things #stranger things spoilers #stranger things s4 #billy hargrove #steve harrington #jonathan byers #the party st #the party #harringrove #netflix stranger things #i hate it here

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hopetofantasy · 4 years ago

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Nora Dari: “I’m a poetic streetrat” (older article)

The Angelie Jolie of Winterslag? “No, I’m just Nora Dari”, says the 17-year-old actress who one day - but not now - wants to adopt a few kids and who is determined to make it in Hollywood. “I have a lead role in the Flemish ‘wtFOCK’, played a role in the Finnish ‘Bullets’ and my French act in ‘Ghost Tropic’ was well received at Cannes,” she says, “A good foundation to go international”

To everyone who’s feeling a bit low and could need a boost: go talk to Nora Dari for 15 minutes. We should know, because we’ve almost never saw such primal force, drive and positivity in a teenager. A teen with a laid-out plan: to become world famous as an actress, with Hollywood as the final destination. The first step has been taken, because Nora just came back from Cannes where she went to promote the arthouse movie ‘Ghost Tropic’ with director Bas Devos. Her big smile shows us that’s she’s still walking on clouds. “I have a big crush on Lukas Dhont (director of ‘Girl’) and he was watching ‘Ghost Tropic’!”, Nora starts. “This already made my year. Other than that, I’ve talked with some producers and I saw Luca Guadagnino, the director of ‘Call me by your name’. I can’t believe this is happening to me.” Barely three years ago, you were on the set of ‘Patser’. “It’s right there when I fell in love with everything that movie making entails. When I saw Adil El Arbi and Bilal Fallah (the directors) working on this production, I thought: Ah, so it ís possible. I know now that it doesn’t matter where you come from. You should just go for what you want. My next project was a role in the Finnish tv show ‘Bullets’. It impressed some casting agents, and that’s how the ball went rolling. I don’t have a manager, don’t have a contract with someone, but apparently that wasn’t needed to get a role in ‘Ghost Tropic’. Nice: I’ve acting in English in a Finnish tv show, play the lead in the Flemish show ‘wtFOCK’ and in ‘Ghost Tropic’ I’m speaking French. Perfect, because I want to go international.” Solid plan. “I know what I want and that is: movie making. Really, I’m hooked. There’s nothing that makes me happier than this. And if you found something that made you happy, there’s no reason not to go for it.” Your father works in IT, your mother is a homemaker. Aren’t they scared that their daughter’s dreams are too big? “I’m very lucky with my parents. Dad came to pick up me from a movie set at 3AM. At 4 o’clock we were in bed and he had to wake up at 6 to go to work, so I could sleep longer, but he did it with a smile. My parents are happy, when their children are happy. And they enjoy what I’m going through: dad went with me to the ‘Ghost Tropic’ movie set in the Dominican Republic and mom accompanied me when I was doing ‘Bullets’. They know I’m serious, that it’s going somewhere.” In ‘Ghost Tropic’ you’re a Moroccan teenager who struggled with her identity. Do you fit that description? “I’m a teenager and I’m Moroccan, so that fits *laughs*. Other than that, I think that every girl my age struggles with her identity, no matter where her roots lie. Although, I have to admit it’s a bit more complicated if you have two nationalities. There are moments where I don’t feel Moroccan enough and moments where I don’t feel Belgian enough. I just recently found it it’s not that bad being both Belgian as well as Moroccan, it’s beautiful *pulls a sad face*. Even though, the election results are sad.” Does that hurt you? *thinks for a while* “Of course it hurts, but I can’t see that I didn’t saw it coming. And I’m not going to look at the Flemish people differently, because I’m Flemish myself. I don’t blame people, because these people voted out of fear. Sad, because in times like these, we’re supposed to hold each other instead of pushing each other away. People shouldn’t have to worry about a woman walking on the street with a hijab, they should worry about their wallets.” Are you faced with racism sometimes? “Sure. I’m muslim, so then you receive hateful reactions on the regular. Sometimes racism is in the little things and not that clear. For example, in class, when they talk about Moroccans and they point at me. It’s not meant to be insulting, but it creates a distance: we and them. If you find yourself in that kind of situations regularly, then you have to be strong, which is not a problem with me *laughs*. I don’t let it get to me, just like I don’t put all my value on positive commentary. I rather go with my own strength.” How are your studies? “I’m in my sixth year Economics-Languages. As we speak, my classmates have a French test *laughs*. I have to make up for it later, but that’s not a problem, because I don’t neglect my studies. If I do, my parents will make me stop acting and that can’t happen. If I’m done with high school, maybe I’ll take a gap year. If during that year, the bigger projects don’t come in, I’ll start my studies in Cross Media Management.” Where does your drive come from? “I remember a beautiful summer vacation in the south of Morocco, where my grandpa lives. At night, I often went to sit on the roof of the house, with the starry night above me. During one of those nights, I discovered myself. There, at that moment, I told myself: It can’t be that you can’t reach your dreams, if you work hard enough for it. Okay, you need a bit of luck, but how much? When I was back in Belgium, I knew for sure: I’m going for it, nobody will hold me back. The most important thing is that you believe in yourself, what others might think of you. And you’ll meet people on the daily who’ll look at you with sad eyes if you say you want to be an actress. But fuck that, I can’t take that into account.” What do directors see in you? “I think they know it’s not about fame with me, but the art.” - article cut here, the rest is behind paywall -

#wtfock #wtfam

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jackdawyt · 4 years ago

Video

youtube

We’ve finally reached the moment my channel was created for, BioWare officially revealed a brand-new behind the scenes trailer that showcased many gameplay prototypes, concept artwork pieces and next-gen footage that each demonstrate Dragon Age 4’s current production stages, building an overall mood of the game’s vision and direction. And it’s just the best thing to come out of this year.

Saria and myself have already broken down the trailer’s concept art, and gameplay shots in an incredible 45-minute video, that you need to check out if you’re remotely interested in the next Dragon Age game.

However, today I’m delving into every single piece of information that surrounds this new trailer, as we’ve got plenty of news, tweets and tidbits to delve into!

First up though, before the trailer’s release we had a few related tweets from the team regarding the current production of the game.

Production Updates:

In late July, Mark Darrah tweeted some updates about Dragon Age 4’s development. He said: “I realize that most of you are here for Dragon Age news and there hasn't been a lot of that lately...

Let me just run down some things I can say:

1. We are working on the next Dragon Age

2. Yes we are working from home

3. Working from home is harder

4. We are making progress”

Continuing from that, John Epler retweeted Darrah’s post and said: “WFH is hard! But we're figuring it out, a little better every day. I miss lunches with my team, though.”

And, Patrick Weekes tweeted: “An exhausting but productive week, with a bunch of folks across the Narrative team coming together for Writer Voltron to look at some stuff and figure out how to make it better. Harder over Zoom, but worth it nevertheless.”

@stoner_gordon asked Patrick: “Writer Voltron? Maybe I’m slow today but what do you mean by that?”

Patrick Weekes replied: “There are things writers can work on for awhile by ourselves. Followers, or individual quests. But some stuff is owned by multiple writers, so we set aside time for all of us (plus non-writers involved with Narrative) to get together and hash things out. That’s Writer Voltron.

It is mostly a TON of meetings. We go over content and see what works and what doesn’t. It’s also the time where we make big narrative decisions as a team (or make big proposals we then bring to other affected departments).

Examples of stuff we decide at things like this:

- Hey, this big story element doesn’t work

- How should we do romances?

- Hey, this big huge thing is unclear

- Does it feel like we’re all making the same game?

We have a great team. It’s positive. We’re all exhausted by Friday.”

This was a very interesting look at how the writing team are pushing forward during the current world situation, ensuring that each writer can push on with individual work, while tasks that are assigned to many writers are slightly trickier, the team are working it out, while staying as safe as possible. And, I’m always eager to hear how certain things like individual quests, followers and romances are being developed.

Dragon Age Website Update:

With the new trailer’s release, the Dragon Age website was updated. The trailer itself ended on the notion of visiting DragonAge.com.

Upon impact to the site, there’s a red lyrium wallpaper with a slogan that says:

The world needs a new hero. Will you answer the call?

“Journey into the world of Thedas in Dragon Age™. Discover new adventures full of striking characters, powerful magic, and rich storytelling. Meet an incredible number of Humans, Elves, Dwarves, and Qunari in a realm where every decision you make echoes across history.”

New protagonist, new adventures, striking characters, powerful magic, rich storytelling, a roster of races with every decision having rippling effects in the world. Each quality that truly define a Dragon Age game. Very exciting to see this!

Behind The Scenes Trailer:

Onwards to the trailer, we have many of the amazing developers sharing plenty of insights into the next Dragon Age game’s vision and development.

Casey Hudson stated their using next generation technology, which will be Anthem’s codebase and tools of the Frostbite engine, to bring the world and characters of Dragon Age to life. And the team are still in early production, I’ve estimated that they’ve been in production stages for around 15 months, since May 2019.

Casey Hudson (General Manager): “We’ve been using next generation technology to bring the world and characters of Dragon Age to life. We’re still in early production.”

Gameplay Designer Melissa Janowicz spoke about creating bosses and how she helps with many of the creature designs, mostly doing the big threats we’ll go up against. This trailer’s concept art certainly paints a picture of many dark, evil monsters to defeat.

Melissa Janowicz (Gameplay Designer): “We’re very experimental here at BioWare, so we’re always coming up with new stuff.”

“I actually design bosses; I help with the creature design team as well. So, I do all of the big threats you have to go up against.”

The Creative Director, and previous Art Director, Matthew Goldman shared that Dragon Age is all about mystery, and hard-boiled detective stories, which is an egg-cellent pun. All wrapped up in a fantasy setting, with an original world.

Matthew Goldman (Creative Director): “The world of Dragon Age has really got it all, it’s got frontier stories, it’s got mystery, it’s got hard-boiled detective stories. And of course, it’s all wrapped up in kind of a fantasy setting.”

“This is an original world, original flora, original wildlife, original architecture, that makes it fun to explore and discover.”

Executive Producer, and proficient teaser, Mark Darrah shared that in the next Dragon Age, we get an opportunity to see new things, new places, and interact with people who lived and grew up in these spaces as well.

There’s a huge emphasis on characters we haven’t met yet, because of course, the Inquisition declared it would look for new people to deal with Solas. We’re going to Northern Thedas, we should expect brand new characters to fall in love with.

Mark Darrah (Executive Producer): “In the next Dragon Age, we get an opportunity to see new things, new places, and interact with people who lived and grew up in these spaces as well.”

Mastermind, and Lead Writer Patrick Weekes shared about the game that currently working on, and how they want to tell a very different story about what happens when you don’t have power, what happens when the people in charge aren’t willing to address the issues.

This time around, we’re playing as a new hero, with not nearly as enough power like the Inquisitor, but instead someone who most likely comes from humble tidings, at a guess, someone like a spy, Antivan Crow, or Lord of Fortune.

No matter the role, our main character will have many conflicts with the predominate people in charge, as they aren’t willing to tackle the issues at stake. I can assume many ideas of course, perhaps the Tevinter Magisterium, The Qunari Invasion, or the Dread Wolf’s scheme.

Whatever powerful force that may ignore the ongoing issues, there’s going to be a lot of conflict from what can assume is going forward thanks to Tevinter Nights.

Patrick Weekes (Lead Writer): “For the game we’re working on now, we want to tell a story – what happens when you don’t have power, what happens when the people in charge aren’t willing to address the issues.”

Arby’s Enthusiast, and Narrative Director John Epler spoke on the things we can expect in the next instalment, there are going to be stories that focus on the people around you, and the friends and family you make.

Every Dragon Age game is about the family we create along the way, expecting more of that, lightens my heart!

John Epler (Narrative Director): “The things you can expect in the next instalment are going to be stories that focus on the people around you, and the friends and family you make.”

“I just love the possibilities that Dragon Age offers us, and I’m excited to explore a lot more of them.”

Associate Producer Jen Cheverie shared that something we’ll be able to look forward to in the next Dragon Age are really close relationships with game characters who really become real for you. I’m so excited to see how relationships and friendships develop in the next game.

Jen Cheverie (Assoc. Producer): “Something we’ll be able to look forward to in Dragon Age is a really close relationship with game characters who really become real for you.”

Foundation Technical Director, Jon Renish, with an amazing beard, spoke on how BioWare want characters to either be loved or hated, the best examples of that is Solas. Half of the community wants to kill him, half the people want to marry him, then another part want to do both.

The fact that the devs can stir these reactions, proves that BioWare can and will create characters that move, and shape us.

If they can make you love or hate a character, they’ve successfully made you care for this world, even if hate is that motivator. However, if you felt nothing for a character, then you wouldn’t have these strong reactions, and wouldn’t feel as connected to the world, or that character.

Jon Renish (Foundation Technical Director): “We want characters to either be loved or hated, one of the best examples of that is Solas. Half of the community wants to kill him, half the people want to marry him, then another part want to do both.”

Lead Creature Animator, Esther Ko confirmed that Dragon Age 4 is being created using motion-matching technology, that will ensure characters will be as realistic as possible, from the way they walk, move and interact.

We saw a sneak peak of Solas’s facial animations, and we can already see the improvement of graphical fidelity and animation quality.

Esther Ko (Lead Creature Animator): “BioWare and EA have been one of the forerunners in using motion matching technology, and that makes it way more realistic for when you're looking at the characters, the way the walk and move, and interact in the world.”

Writer Slyvia Feketekuty spoke on how players want suspension of their disbelief, to believe that the bunch of pixels that make up these characters are actually a living, breathing soul.

Slyvia Feketekuty (Writer): “Players want that suspension of disbelief that this wonderful collection of digital pixels is actually a living breathing soul.”

Gameplay Director Andre Garcia said that choice is a big part of what Dragon Age is as a franchise, the decisions you make can affect change in the world. Reiterating that the next Dragon Age will most certainly surround our choices, with consequences for each.

Andre Garcia (Gameplay Director): “Choice is a big part of what Dragon Age is as a franchise, the decisions you make can affect change in the world.”

Adding more fuel to the fire for choices and consequences, RPG Programmer Katrina Barkwell spoke on decision-making meaning that a party member lives, or a party member dies. Ultimately, choice making means owning your outcome and reactivity to the choices that you do make.

Katrina Barkwell (RPG Programmer): “Decision-making can mean that a party member lives, or a party member dies. And it means owning your outcome and reactivity to the choices that you do make.”

I said in my breakdown, and I’ll say it again here, it was very nice to see a few of the developers that we love and support in this trailer, sharing vital information on the next game. The story about Dragon Age 4’s development is all about the people creating it, and I am so glad that BioWare have an amazing, tremendously talented bunch of people who know what Dragon Age is.

Adding to that, it was so wholesome to see many of the other developers on a zoom call, showing how despite the current world situation, they’re doing all they can to push the development of the next Dragon Age.

Key Trailer Features:

Moving on, throughout the trailer, we had many key features highlighted.

The in-engine shots showcase the next-gen improved fidelity and quality of the Frostbite engine. The reveal of Solas’s facial animations indicate more realistic and life-like animations and scenes, just look at his pearly white teeth, and how his face folds.

And the Gameplay shots reveal a character playing as a warrior, with a sword and shield, wearing Grey Warden armour. Most certainly, the character is a champion specialization, indicated by the “Line in the Sand” ability.

We see them evading, blocking, shield bashing, and preparing to strike. The camera placement is solid, I really like the angle it currently has, I’m hoping it stays like this.

The spider with hands is incredibly frightening, however, beautifully animated. I just hope it’s not going to grab items like the barrel, and throw them at us, when approaching combat.

Two brand-new voice actors were revealed: Jee Young Han & Ike Amadi

Jee Young Han previously appeared in Anthem, as the character Sentinel Dax. In Dragon Age 4, conceptually, she’s playing a character called “Bellara”, whom I’d suspect is a dwarf, given that Qunari and Dwarves generally have American voice actors. Not to mention her dialogue line of something being “the good kind of rumble.”

Ike Amadi, also appeared in a previous BioWare title, being Mass Effect 3, as he played Javik! It seems he’s playing a character by the name of Davrin. Who is most certainly a Grey Warden, indicated by his dialogue? Perhaps he’s the Grey Warden in Tevinter Nights’ cover, considering none of the characters on the book’s cover appeared in the actual book?

Concept Art:

Moving on, the majority of the trailer features amazing conceptual artwork that reflects the mood, tone, story threads and narrative beats that the developers would like the final game to take inspiration from.

Equally, that means the concepts may or may not appear in the finished project, it’s too early to tell. However, that doesn’t mean we shouldn't pass on dissecting and inspecting the art pieces, because we get a sense of BioWare’s vision, scope and direction for Dragon Age 4.

Adding to this, Patrick Weekes tweeted about how concept art is used to create a mood, not to outrightly confirm things, but for a framework. While some concepts may excite you, like “Harley Qun”, don’t get attached just yet because they may, and will change.

To quote Weekes: “We can't answer questions right now about who is or isn't a follower or what story choices we're making. Beyond giving away too much too early, we could also give you the wrong impression and leave you disappointed later. Or we might need to change things between now and ship.

What I can say is that I personally am proud and excited about the game we're making. I hope that came through in the video. I also hope you have fun speculating, even if we can't answer questions right now. You all made a lot of devs' days yesterday. Thanks.”

So, while it’s absolutely fun, and amazing to speculate about what these concepts may relate to, and the direction of the next game, don’t get too attached just in case certain plot threads or characters are cut or changed.

Needless to say, me and Saria still have plenty of speculation videos coming up following the trailer, because we find enjoyment in speculation, and seeing how far off from the truth we were when the game actually does ship, I think that’s a good mindset to have.

Regarding the trailer as a whole, I think it’s fair to say it was created as a reaction to what was shown at EA Play. A lot of the fanbase, and people in general were upset with what was shown, however, BioWare listened to us, and delivered this behind the scenes trailer, two months after.

We can tell it was recently filmed too, not to get too stalker-ry, but Patrick Weekes dyed their hair on the 19th, June, which was a day after EA Play.

If they had done so before, Weekes’ would’ve had their natural hair-colour in the trailer.

So, even with the current world situation, the developers took the time to film and create this amazing BTS trailer. Speaking on behalf of the entire DA fandom, thank you so much BioWare for giving us a trailer while in very early-production stages. It has been the saving grace of 2020.

Romance Teases:

In other news, we have a few Weekes Tweets that regard romance in the future.

Patrick Weekes retweeted @nevarran-novice saying: “This is my formal request that BioWare give us at least one emotionally damaging romance for every Dragon Age game. Like, literally scoop my soul out and throw it at the wall with the angst. Please.”

Patrick replied with: “I mean I like happy romances with fun positive endings, but the customer is always right!”

It really is true; we all love pain and tragedy in this fandom, as we play Lost Elf theme at 1 am, sobbing in the night. I’m not the only one, right?

Patrick Weekes tweeted: “Hi, sorry, stumbled across this while looking for something else. Just wanted to say:

- Disliking a character or ship is totally valid and does not hurt my feelings

- Coming into someone’s space to say that what they like or dislike is wrong is bad, sorry that happened to you.

And in games with romances, I believe that the same-sex romances should offer the same spectrum of sweet-to-spicy that the straight options do. If all our m/m romances feel dirty while our m/f romances range from romantic to raunchy, then we need to do better.

This clearly hints to BioWare making their future romances more tasteful for every type of romance, which is always good, more inclusivity for everyone! In my honest opinion, I don’t need sex scenes to drive romances, while I’m sure I’d love one for a potential Qunari female wife, I don’t need, or desire them for every single character. Sex and romance in moderation; while being tasteful, sounds perfect in my opinion.

In the concept artwork, we saw a sexy, Qunari female, that many of us have dubbed the nickname “Harley Qun”, while it’s really hard not to get attached, it’s nice to see BioWare making this character idea more of a reality.

In 2017, a fan asked Weekes about the idea of a strong female Qunari companion. Weekes replied: “definitely a chance. We like doing character types we haven’t down before, and that would be a biggie in hypothetical future game.”

So, while Harley is still just a concept design, there’s much potential for her in the future. I wonder if Patrick is writing her too, not that I’m basing my news on retweets, but Patrick has been retweeting a lot of her fanart. But that could just be because we’re already obsessed with her.

Final romance related tweet, because I didn’t know where else to put this one... Patrick Weekes tweeted: “Is "Dick in a Box" formally a Lonely Island song, or is it technically SNL? It's for work.”

So, erm. Yep, there’s that.

Mark....:

Mark Darrah tweeted: “No release date to share at this time…” Obviously as a joke, for those who don’t know, the next Dragon Age is at least 2-3 years away, according to EA’s 2019 earnings call.

Next Comic:

As a final, very exciting news update, Nunzio DeFillipis, the amazing Dragon Age comic writer, alongside with his wife, Christian Weir posted on Tumblr about the potential of a new comic mini-series:

They replied to autopotion asking about the future of the comics, saying:

“We have another miniseries planned - and it would have come out this year if not for the current world situation shutting down the industry. We don’t want to promise anything, because everything is so up in the air with the entire world right now. But what we can say is that if and when there is another miniseries, it will wrap up the story we’ve been telling since Knight Errant. We will then aim to tell more stories, but one thing at a time.”

“Wish we could say more. Because we have a LOT to say, we promise. Hopefully we can talk about things soon.”

As an absolute fan of each of the Dragon Age comics, the fact that most certainly another one is on its way, and it will end the narrative since Knight Errant excites the crap out of me. Originally, it seems we would’ve had two comic launches this year, Blue Wratih to start year, and one following from that, ending 2020.

I imagine we’ll see this project back on track soon. It sounds as if this one may be a conclusion to the current comic roster, and after that, we may get brand new stories explored in other comics. While that’s quite far off, I adore this team behind the comics, and eagerly await an update to their stories.

With all that said, that’s a wrap for this most exciting news update, I’m honestly so excited to be creating Dragon Age content at the moment, making videos that I’ve dreamed about creating for so long. Check out my latest breakdown, and if you’re new, why not follow me, you’re in the best place to be informed on all things Dragon Age related. From the lore to speculation and news, I have it all here.

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

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Survey #398

“freedom is just man’s invention, & a soldier is just a slave”

What do you do the most when you’re online? Watch/listen to YouTube. Do you have a bobblehead? No. Have you ever spent your birthday alone? No, that sure would suck. Were you afraid of heights as a child? Actually no, but NOW I kinda am. Have you ever had a lead role in a play? No. Would you ever take a solo road trip? No, that sounds super depressing and lonely. Do the mountains fascinate you? Of course! So much history built into a magnificent, awe-inspiring piece of nature. Have you ever been insulted or called names by a significant other? Wow, no. I wouldn't tolerate that for a second. What’s your favorite movie battle scene? The fight between Simba and Scar is very powerful imo. Have you ever been to a same-sex wedding? No, but not because I'm opposed. I'd love to go to one and be the photographer. What’s your favorite Marvel movie? Probably one of the Spider-Man films. I don't remember which it is, and I don't want to spoil it by explaining what I do recall. Did you have a Walkman when you were a kid? No. What’s the most difficult experience you and a significant other have gone through together? Being long-distance when we really wanted each other's physical comfort. Have you ever attempted to pick a lock? Did you succeed? Yes, because Ashley locked her keys in the car. I don't remember if it worked, actually. Have you done the Bratz doll challenge for YouTube? No. I've seen a couple people do it, though, and it's both cool and creepy. Does the hospital in your town have a good reputation? NOOOOOOOOOOOO. What is your favorite nickname that you’ve had? "Bee" from Megan. Have you ever gotten a professional massage? No. I would be SO uncomfortable. If you had braces, do you wear your retainers still? No. :/ Well, the one you put in, anyone. I have a metal one behind the front row of my bottom teeth. If you had braces, have your teeth moved since you got them off? Yes. Do you know anyone personally who’s lost a child? I know way too many people who have suffered miscarriages. Do you take your medications regularly? Yes. What’s one luxury item you wish you could afford? An actually nice house. What’s your favorite thing to do in a swimming pool? Just kinda casually swim around. Have you ever been abused by a cop? No. What is one thing that you took to show-and-tell as a kid? My Snorlax plushy. Do you remember losing your first tooth? No. In the summer would you rather have the windows down or the A/C on in the car? I strongly prefer A/C. Have you ever been addicted to a game? What game? I had a long-time addiction to World of Warcraft for a couple years or so. I still play it now, but I'm not addicted to it anymore. As a matter of fact I get bored of it easily now. Which was better: the original The Lion King or the sequel? The original, but I love both very much. Do any of your grandparents have a tattoo? I don't know if any did. Do you believe that your pets feel love towards you? Roman, 120%. It is so obvious. Venus, no, as reptiles are literally incapable of experiencing that emotion. I do, however, know she trusts me. Are you proud of your body? FUCK no. Have you ever been rushed to the hospital in an ambulance? No. How do YOU believe the world & universe started? I don't know. I feel like MAYBE there is some sort of ultimate intelligence that formed the universe (maybe prompted the Big Bang, though I've always been dubious of that occurring naturally), but I don't think of this topic frequently at all. Does it really matter, after all? We're here, so just focus on that and live in the now. Have you ever stuck gum under a desk/chair? NO, that shit grosses me the hell out. When shopping at a grocery store, do you return your cart or just leave it? Return your fucking cart, please. It is NOT that difficult. What is one thing you’d never want your parents to find out? Certain places I've, uh, "done" things. When you were little, did you like Dr. Suess books? Yep. I seriously loved Green Eggs and Ham. What would you consider unforgivable? Rape is #1. Would you rather give your food to a homeless shelter or money to charity? Food to a homeless shelter, but I'd love to do both. What was your least favorite year of your life so far? 2016 was a fucking NIGHTMARE. Have you spent money on a game online? On one occasion, I asked if Mom would reactivate my WoW account, and when two expansions came out, I asked if she could buy them. I HATED asking. Thankfully, now, I'm rich enough in the game to pay for the "token" currency, which renews your subscription for a month, so I essentially play for free now. Have you been called a bad influence? Yes. Have any self-done piercings? Noooo. I only trust professionals. Ever pierced someone else? Again, no. Leave it to professionals, as well as someone without tremors. If you had a child with down’s syndrome, would you keep him/her? IF I wanted kids, of course I would. It really, REALLY bothers me when DS is the reason behind abortion. Mind you, I am pro-choice, but come on... Don't treat down's syndrome children as a curse. If someone tried to murder your child, do you think it would be wrong to expose them publicly and talk about it on social media? Of fucking course I would. I'd damn that person to hell myself. Is there a toxic person that you miss? I sometimes miss Colleen. Are you still contemplating going back to someone you shouldn’t? With Jason, yes. If he actually wanted me back (that will never happen, but anyway), I fear I'd say yes and probably would, realistically. When was the last time you had a new crush? When I realized I was bisexual. Do you want Jesus to come back soon? Back when I was a Christian, I was terrified of Judgment Day. I don't believe in it now. What is something you can’t wear because of your body type? I COULD wear whatever the hell I wanted, but I refuse to wear crop tops or strapless tops (or strapless bras). Oh, and thongs. No thanks. If you have curves, do you like them? I'm not curvy naturally, I'm just fat. Have you ever worn matching pajamas with someone? No, but that'd be cute. Has anyone ever mistaken you for being anorexic? No way. What fast food place do you avoid at all costs? Arby's, to name one. Are you afraid of deep sea creatures? Yes, especially giant squid. Have you ever agreed to purchase something on Ebay and got scammed somehow? Ugh, I got Ico THREE TIMES and they were ALL broken; they'd freeze in the first few minutes. Has anybody ever given you a promise ring? No. What is your favorite kind of cake? Red velvet. Honestly, have you ever eaten raw cookie dough? Yeah, multiple times. Were you outdoors or indoors more as a kid? I'd say it was a split down the middle. Have you ever had a relationship that began via text? Jason, Tyler, Juan, and Sara all began over text. Girt asked me out over Facebook Messenger. Do you think sloths are cute or ugly? They're cuties! What eyeshadow suits you best? I only wear black eyeshadow. Do you watch the show Wizards of Waverly Place? I did as a kid and really liked it. Have you ever been to the rainforest? No. I don't think I could handle the humidity, though I'd love to see all the beautiful wonders. Are you a member of any clubs? No. Would you shave your head with a friend who had cancer? If it was someone I was very close to and they were extremely self-conscious about it, I'd probably be willing to get very short hair, but I don't think I could handle no hair at all. How did you meet your pet? Roman was one of the kittens of Ashley's mother-in-law's cats. She has way too many cats and needed to get rid of the kittens, and I'd been wanting one like mad. I found Venus via the online reptile-selling hub called Morph Market, and I became VERY interested in the many, many ball python morphs, and when I saw her, I immediately knew that was my baby. Did/Do you have any PEZ dispensers? I did as a kiddo. What are some of the phrases in your personal ‘bingo’ card? "Mood," "can't relate," "hi, how are ya," "jinkies," "yikes," "oof," shit like that. Have you ever been through a trap door? No. Do/did you have to wear a uniform to your high school? No, only middle school. How many video games do you own? A whole lot. Have you ever visited a sex shop? No. Have you ever ridden a bicycle through a busy city? No, I'd be very scared to. Do you use Instagram? How often do you post there? I have two for my varying photography subjects. I post very rarely on both. Have you ever had a scary encounter with a wild animal? I have not.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''civilize the universe'' by ozzy osbourne

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stillebesat · 3 years ago

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What's in a Dream?

Seriously. Tell me. Because I have been having quite the week of crazy dreams vivid enough for me to remember them days later and they've been....stressing me out a bit. It's hard to get a restful night's sleep when you dream like this.

Dreams I've had under cut because of length:

Tuesday Night: We were in the middle of nowhere. Desert sort of landscape. The place where three dirt roads came together. My siblings and I were 'camping' and had pulled over to investigate an old camper trailer that had been left to rot. Typical 'weathered, been sitting here exposed to the elements for ages' type of wear and tear. It was basically a skeleton of a trailer. There was even an old mattress off to the side in the dirt that was more bedsprings than mattress. Mom was there and was like "Okay, let's get in the car." so my siblings and I (3 of us) got in the car/camper and Mom started heading towards the edge of a cliff. As we were more in redrock country now/kinda on the edge of like a Grand Canyon sort of viewpoint. And I was like "Mom, you need to brake" and she was like "I'm just turning around." But she hit the brakes too late and I closed my eyes and steeled myself as the car skidded over the edge of the cliff. Because my eyes were closed I only felt the swooping sensation of falling. But when I opened my eyes again somehow the entire family had got ejected from the car before it crashed somewhere at the bottom and we landed on the side of the red sandstone cliffs which turned out to have a bit of a trail -a sketchy trail with plenty of open air where you had to edge along the side of the cliff and risk a couple of jumps over open air in order for all of us to make it safely back to the top of the cliff. My main injury was a large rose thorn that had embedded itself just above my elbow on my left arm. I pulled it out, leaving a large puncture wound there, as my phone rang. When I picked up it was my "Dad" on video call (said Dad looked like Thomas Sanders) and he was frantically packing a suitcase on the bed -throwing white clothing around- as he was talking to me reassuring me that he was on his way to rescue us and that we're all going to be fine and he'll be on the next flight over.

Wednesday Night: I was with other people in a Aquarium/University/Mall conglomerate building. The idea was to go see a show. Whether it was a movie in the theater or a show in the Aquarium is unclear, but while I was trying to grab food from the food court, someone like a 'big boss' Fury sort of figure informed me that I was a criminal and that they were trying to capture me. So instead of enjoying a show, my life got turned upside down and I had to run away from my family and friends because I didn't know who to trust and I was haphazardly trying to gather 'supplies' because I was like only 15 or so in the dream and didn't have access to everything regular adults did so I was scrambling to find money and gather clothing and my photographer cousin ended up running into me while I was on my college campus and secretly trying to help me out, but we couldn't meet for long as I was constantly running through the hallway like areas between buildings filled with grass and trees and windows that you could look inside to the classrooms and such.

Thursday Night: Me and a guy were walking along the banks of a pond when we saw this male figure (who looked kinda like the human version of Frankenstein from Hotel Transylvania 4) with half his body covered in a grey/brown mud dragging himself along the bank like a zombie sort of creature. He was doing this in a successful attempt to scare me and the other guy away from the reeds of the pond/lake we were at because (POV switch) I -the square jawed handsome guy- had just killed my wife. How I killed her? No idea. Her body (she looked like the mother from Gilmore Girls) looked like she'd been lounging on the couch and had just died. One hand propped under her head, a smile still fixed on her face even as her unseeing eyes stared at me. But there were no signs of injuries. No obvious cause of death. She was just dead. And me -the husband- decided the best way to hide the body would be to bury her in mud in the reeds of a lake, but as I was finishing the burial, I could hear this couple walking nearby, so I smeared mud on the left side of my body and began dragging myself over to them to act like a ghost or zombie so that it would scare them away. But (POV switch) I -the girl- decided that I'd had enough of creepy zombie people and returned to my dormitory (which reminded me of Hogwarts) to change my clothes and return to class. Only, when I tried to go take a shower, the girls showers were full. So I decided that I would go get clean in the boy's area. So I walked, basically naked with only a towel covering my bottom half but my top exposed through the hallways filled with guys who were standing there flummoxed that I was walking around like that and that I didn't seem to care (I did, I was just putting on an act) that I was walking around half naked in their presence.

Friday Night: I was in my bedroom, which was located on the North side of the house/apartment I lived in. I was in a basement room, in the back corner of the house with the driveway next to one window, and the backyard was behind the west one. I could hear a guy outside moving around and occasionally going into the backyard to 'do his business' aka pee on our walls. It turns out some college guy was using the driveway -which was between my house and the neighbor's house (but reminded me of my grandmother's driveway up in Wyoming) as a camping spot with a tent and everything. Which we couldn't have him there because we kinda needed the driveway to park our cars in, and when my roommate A came downstairs to talk to me about the issue, we heard the guy come down behind the house again to pee on our walls, but when he finished there was a cop there who arrested him for trespassing, but also ended up arresting Roommate A because apparently the 'special insect killer' pesticide she used to protect the plants growing on the side of our house carried an ingredient that was spelled something like "Beilium" and that was in fact a poison to humans so the cops thought that she was purposely planning to kill people because as the college students of the forensic's class told us when at least four of them descended on me and Roommate A and Roommate T that in our applications to live in the place we'd put various gothic things like ...idk... "Love tombstones, Wanna dance on graves. Best roommates are the dead ones." etc. But all three of us had filled these out in that way just to show that we had a different sort of humor compared to the other people in the area as we didn't want just 'anyone' to join us in the house to be our roommate and so the three of us had to convince these college aged investigator people that we weren't actual killers, and this was happening in my room/the kitchen so I was puttering around and grabbed a beaded bracelet of like a phoenix where the bird was 3D in beads sitting on top of the bracelet, but the bracelet was made of a tinfoil/blanket material and it folded out and became this big blanket and I was struggling to fold it back up into it's original bracelet shape (I think the colors were red and silver? maybe gold?) but it refused to fold that small and end up covering like my entire arm instead of just my wrist. I ended up giving up in favor of us taking the college students -who were outside with us talking about where they were meeting for their college graduation and basically saying "we don't know but we'll know when we know" as the closing ceremony would be happening 'soon' but first we would go grab a bite to eat and we cycled through the options but I ended up seeing Roommate A/ my sister sitting at a table of an 'Arby's so we went inside to order food to continue our discussion, but as we sat at the table the lights around us flashed three times. Which was code for "Active Shooter in the building." Everyone around us froze, counting the flashes and such and when I looked up there was a 'gunman' standing in front of the counter, with two fast food workers in black standing among the customers seated around eating their food trying to talk the gunman down. There was a buzzing in my ears making it so I couldn't understand what the shooter was saying, but the basic gist was that he would ask each person a question and if they didn't answer it right, he would shoot them. So there was "Garbled question" then BANG. Garbled question. Another BANG. And I was staring at my Cousin A who was sitting at the very front with wide eyes staring at the gunman as he turned to her to ask her a question---

Saturday Night: I had just arrived at work and was preparing to go clean the cat adoption center, only as I came into the room it turned out the adoption group we were partnered with had dropped off like 40 cats/kittens into the room. But instead of trying to fit them all into the ten cages we had, they'd placed like maybe twelve of them in the cages and then left the rest of the cats out to freely roam around the tiny adoption area, though the group had left their traveling carriers around with the doors open so the cats could seek shelter if needed,but they'd left the door to the adoption center open as well meaning that the cats could have free access to the rest of the store. However for whateve reason they had basically stuck to their enclosure. So I didn't have to worry about finding any cats elsewhere they were in this area. And one of the cats was this adorable black kitten that, when it moved, the light would catch on the fur reflecting a shimmering green peacock coloration. (the eyes on the feathers) in the fur. The kitty even had some peacock feathers along its tail. And I knew my sister would love this cat as she loves peacocks and wanted to get a cat but couldn't because her husband didn't want one, but I pulled out my phone to try and take a picture of the kitty to send to her to see if this would be the cat that would finally convince her to go ahead and get a cat, only I couldn't get a good picture because all these people kept coming into the store. First it was a huge class of like pre-schoolers/kindergartners. Then it was a group of older adults with special needs, as well as a group of people who looked to have come from a nursing home, and each group tried to come into the adoption area -which was filthy because there were cats out of their cages so there was cat littler everywhere and some of it had gotten wet from spilled water bowls and mixed from spilled food bowls so it wasn't the safest/cleanest place to be at the moment as I hadn't had time to clean the room yet. And to top it off, it was only like 7:30 in the morning. So we weren't even OPEN yet. We didn't open until NINE. So I had to fend off each group -which all had the same feisty Karen woman (who looked like our 'favorite' red headed regular customer we get into the store (she's difficult to work with)) and inform them that they couldn't be in the store at this time because we were still closed and for their safety they would need to leave. So I had to tell the group of thirty children and their six adult minders, and then the group of special needs visitors with their tenders, and then the group of nursing home people and their nurses that we were CLOSED and to leave and NONE of them were happy to hear that. But like...they were the ones who'd snuck into the building through the door of our vet clinic and not through the main store doors. So I told them to come back later. That no they couldn't see the cats as I couldn't have them in the room while I was cleaning, and that they needed to leave. No one was happy to hear that, and in the process somewhere i lost my phone and found it again in a classroom. But as I was trying to gather the supplies to clean the cages while sending people away these two girls approached me looking for replacement lightbulbs for their reptile cages and they couldn't find them. Which...we still weren't open for the day, but I ended up leading them to a little outside giftshop area where we kept our Christmas decorations -leading them through a random loading dock area filled with people working on stocking the store and such- and showed them where the lightbulbs were -though I didn't see them at first as they'd changed locations and I only found them as we were about to head down the stairs and back outside- so I was showing each customer the lightbulbs they would need for their individual lamps----

And yah....

Those are the dreams I've had this past week.

Overall my takeaway is that every aspect of my life is somehow stressing me out currently. Yaaaay.

#stilledreams #dreams #I don't even know how to tag this #but beware the dreams are rather crazy #vent post in a way because AHHHH #i like dreams as much as the next person #but this is getting to be a bit much

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luminecho · 4 years ago

Note

Do you have an opinion on the following:

Hairless cats

Chicken nuggets

St. Patrick's day

Florida

Just asking because your anon asks have been weird lately and I wanted to add to that in the most chaotic neutral way possible

Oh hell yeah I have opinions, THANK YOU for this golden opportunity anon

Hairless cats? Beautiful. Incredible. Wonderful. The light of my life. I want to hug all of them and wrap them up in comfy little sweaters and kiss them on their little foreheads. They’re nasty (affectionate) and I love them with my whole heart. Anyone who doesn’t like them can meet me behind the Arby’s tonight to throw hands because I’ll defend them to the grave. (Also, since they’re hairless, they don’t set off my pet allergies! Which is a BIG WIN because I can pet and cuddle a cat without my eyes melting out of their sockets!)

Chicken nuggets? Uhhhhhhhh well I used to eat them like,, every day when I was little but I don’t eat meat anymore so. Idk, no opinion on this one? They taste good from what I remember lol

St. Patrick’s day, I always forget when it’s coming because I literally could not care less about it. I end up wearing green on accident anyway because green is basically the only color in my wardrobe. It was one of the holidays that kids would always put stickers on their face for and color their cheeks with marker. I bet all of us could forget about St. Patrick’s day and the world would be all the better for it. Or actually— don’t bother celebrating it unless you’re going ALL OUT. Idk much about St. Patrick’s day lore or how it’s actually supposed to be celebrated, but like... it’s gotta be all or nothing. Go big or go home

Florida. FUCK Florida, I hate Florida, Florida is GROSS, I hate it there. It’s HOT and HUMID and I’ve been there TWICE which is TWICE TOO MANY. I’m pretty sure my mom and I both got sick when we went. People who live in Florida scare me. People in Florida could just be crocodiles in disguise and you wouldn’t know because you probably have heatstroke because of the god awful weather

#feel free to debate me on these idk I’m always in the mood for more chaotic conversations #ty anon <3 #//#answered #anonymous

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crmsnmth · 9 months ago

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September Sky Chapter Five, Part 1

-442

My phone woke me up. My first thought was to throw my phone across the room. Nobody calls me in the mornings.

"Fuck off," I answered tiredly. I yawned and took place of where I was. My room was a mess. I needed to do laundry soon. I heard laughter on the other line.

" Good morning to you too," a voice I recognized but couldn't place said.

"It's early. I don't answer if it's early."

"Well, too bad. What are you doing tonight? When you're done with work." I still couldn't place who it was, but it was obviously someone I knew.

"Probably going home. Why?" I was intrigued. I really didn't want to go hang out with anyone after work. With the exception of Chad and Addison.

"Me and Kayla are going to Club Specter and you're coming along." It finally clicked who the voice belonged to. Conner. Conner and I had been pretty good friends while I lived in Oconomowoc. We had worked at the Arby's together. Every so often, him and his girlfriend, Kayla would come to Milwaukee, and give me no choice but to hang out with them for the night. In a way it was kind of nice, guess.

"Ok, I guess I'll be doing that."

"You know if you said no, we'd still force your sorry ass out," he said. And they would. They would scour my known hangouts until they found me and would drag me kicking and screaming out of the places I would hide in.

"I know you would. Only reason I'm agreeing. It's easy when you don't have a choice in the matter." I yawned as I spoke.

"I'll take it. You should be done by eleven right?"

"Hopefully."

"Cool, then we'll just meet you there."

"Yeah, I'll grab a go-bag."

"Right on. See you later." And he hung up.

I sighed and stretched, finally looking to see the time. It was almost noon, so I guess I couldn't be too upset being woken up. I still hated waking up to a phone call. I'm already weird and awkward, and adding just waking up into the mix makes it so much worse. I guess I should be happy he called. I had two hours to get ready and get myself to work.

I grabbed some clothes and hopped in the shower, washing the sweat of night off. The nightmares were still there, but every once in a while I get a night without them.

Once done, I threw my clothes on, and throwing some extra 'goth' clothes in a canvas backpack. I grabbed my essentials; phone, wallet, cigarettes and lighter. Out the door I went, lighting a cigarette as I locked the door behind me. June was here and it was a beautiful day out. The sky was infinite in it's blue ocean. The air was warm, with the taste of summer air brushing my lips.

As I was walking, my phone rang again. This was unusual. Hell, it was unusual for it to ring once. I looked at the caller ID and couldn't help but smile. We had been talking at least once every day. Either through a phone call or through some form of instant messaging.

"Hey," I answered, knowing full well she could hear the smile on my face. Every call I spent with her was spent with a smile glued to my face.

"Hi. What are you doing?"

"I am making my way to work. Why, what's up?" I asked.

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hypnoshatesme · 5 years ago

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Do you like Science? Because I’ve got my ion you

Cecil couldn’t stop fidgeting. He had gone through his entire wardrobe trying to decide on the perfect outfit for this occasion and now he was reconsidering if green had been a good idea after all as he fixed the slightest wrinkles in the sleeve of his tunic, only to wrinkle the other sleeve in the process. Cecil was nervous. This wasn’t sitting on Carlos’ car and watching the lights above Arby's in silence. This was a date. And it had been a long time since Cecil had been on a date. And he had never been on a date with somebody as perfect as Carlos.

He was overthinking again. Cecil tried to remind himself to breathe. It would be fine. It would be like that night, but with talking and drinking and eating. It would be just as nice. It would be better, even, lacking the shadow of (presumed) death that had hung over them the night on the hood of Carlos’ car. Cecil just needed to keep calm and conversation would come naturally. He could do it. Talking is what he did, after all.

“Cecil!”, Carlos' caramel voice called out as he speedwalked up to Gino's, in front of which Cecil was waiting.

The voice alone shattered Cecil’s feeble calm, his heart pounding nearly painfully as he looked up to meet the scientist. He hadn't seen Carlos since the night at the Arby's, where he had looked tired, shaken, dirty and bloody, but still like the most beautiful thing on earth. Now, in his pristine white lab coat, his glossy locks neatly combed with only a few stray strands falling into his forehead, stuck to his beautiful skin that looked like it'd be so very smooth to the touch. He was breathtaking. The very definition of perfection. Cecil’s mouth went dry.

"I’m so sorry I made you wait, the samples at the lab tried to escape and it took a moment to restrain them…", Carlos continued as he came to a stop in front of Cecil.

Cecil tried very, very hard not to gawk, to give any sort of answer, but Carlos flashed him an apologetic grin and Cecil nearly choked on his words. He tried again after an awkward cough, "O-Oh, don't worry, Carlos. I haven't been waiting too long.", he managed a tad quicker than normal.

Carlos grinned and nodded towards the door, "Let's not wait any longer, then." They both walked into the restaurant, tentatively locking arms on their way.

There was silence between them after they ordered and Cecil was trying to remember how to form words. He was known for babbling when nervous, a waterfall of words, pointless anecdotes and the like leaving his mouth to fill in any uncomfortable - and sometimes comfortable - silence. That wasn't happening today. He kept getting distracted by Carlos' fingers running through his gorgeous locks, by his hands rearranging the cutlery in front of him, eyes scanning the room occasionally. Had those always been so beautifully chocolate brown? When they fell on Cecil, Carlos’ perfect lips pulled up into a shy smile and Cecil forgot how to speak all over again, blushing deeply and scrambling to hide his embarrassment behind his drink, that thankfully had arrived quickly.

“I’ve been reading a book on Helium and struggling with putting it down.”, Carlos finally said, and Cecil was too busy trying to keep it together to notice the slight waver in the scientist's voice. He was too busy to even ask if said book was approved by City Council.

But he did notice the tone. It was the kind of tone used for jokes, one followed by an expectant silence and Cecil laughed before even registering the fact that he hadn't understood what exactly the joke was. He was too eager to finally know what to do and his body went on autopilot and then he was panicking again because he couldn't tell how much laughter was the correct amount to whatever Carlos had said. When he finally got himself to look up at him, though, the sight took his breath away. Carlos was smiling, warm and...relieved? Cecil wondered, but only for a fracture of a second, before he noticed the way the scientist's eyes crinkled and forgot all about the relief. Carlos' eyes were shining, his whole face was, illuminated by that perfect smile showing his perfect teeth. Cecil thought he might faint if he didn't look away but he also wanted to remember this expression forever, burn it into his memory - literally, if necessary.

Carlos started to talk about his experiments, then, and when their food arrived a couple minutes later Cecil had been swept into the conversation, nervousness melting a little with every smile Carlos gave him. He took a more passive role, nodding and inquiring further about the science Carlos was excitedly talking about. Carlos seemed to light up with every question or interested comment Cecil made, occasionally making another pun or joke Cecil usually didn’t understand, but laughed anyways, making Carlos chuckle on more than one occasion. It was the most beautiful sound Cecil ever heard.

Back at home after the date Cecil was still grinning, felt light and, if possible, more in love than before. It had been the most perfect date and he already felt giddy about the next one. When Carlos asked him as they were walking to the parking lot, Cecil’s answer had come out as a squeek, delighted and surprised that Carlos would want to meet him again. The scientist seemed to have enjoyed it, but having the confirmation made Cecil’s heart flutter all over again. And then of course, the kiss. Cecil hadn't seen it coming, hadn't expected it, and he was proud he managed to not drive into anything on his way home, with the knowledge that Carlos, beautiful, perfect Carlos, had actually kissed him. The small voice at the back of his head telling him that he had basically lied to Carlos by laughing without understanding was barely audible. Not with the lingering memory of Carlos' lips on his.

They were sitting on Carlos’ couch after dinner. Cecil had intended to take Carlos out for their third date, but all restaurants had been struggling with their food turning into a gelatinous, blue goo. Cecil had been quite excited to try something new, but Carlos had not liked the idea and had invited Cecil over to dine at his place instead. The food had been delicious and Cecil had been thoroughly satisfied at the blush dusting Carlos’ cheeks as he kept complimenting his cooking. “It’s adequate at best, really, Cecil.”, he kept mumbling. Maybe it was adequate at best, Cecil wasn’t much of a cook himself, but that certainly didn’t stop him from making sure Carlos knew how much he had enjoyed it. The fact that Carlos looked adorable when flustered didn’t give much incentive to stop.

They had moved to the couch after cleaning up and Carlos found that the avalanche of compliments falling from Cecil's lips was quite effectively stopped with a kiss. Cecil looked dazed when they pulled apart again, and Carlos couldn't help but try to bring him back with a particularly bad joke. He planted a kiss underneath Cecil’s ear, whispering, "I wish I were adenine, so I could be paired up with U.".

Cecil did snap out of his haze, blinking for a moment in confusion. When he spoke there was no trace of laughter in his voice: “Carlos..”, he said instead, voice uncertain.

Carlos felt his pulse pick up in panic, “Ah, nevermind, that one was really bad.”, he said too quickly, leaning away from Cecil and chuckling nervously. He could feel his face heat up.

Cecil’s face fell seeing how his reaction had made the scientist uncomfortable, “No, Carlos, t-that’s not...I...I don’t understand your jokes.”, Cecil said quickly, voice lowering to a murmur by the end of the sentence.

Carlos looked at him, blinking, “Oh well, I...I guess that might be a bit difficult for somebody who isn’t as familiar with science, I-”

“No, no, no, Carlos, I...I never understood them.”, Cecil quickly added, face flushing deeply. He stumbled over his words as he continued, voice getting higher in his rising panic, “I-I just thought you sounded like- you were clearly waiting for some sort of reaction and your tone made me assume you probably had said something funny so I laughed and you looked so very happy so I just...continued doing so and I was afraid to tell you that I didn’t understand the jokes. I didn’t want you to think I’m dumb or something but I also didn’t want to make you mad when you eventually found out I’ve been lying to you and-”

“Cecil!”, Carlos tried again since his first call was drowned in Cecil’s stressed out rambling.

Cecil looked up, tentatively meeting Carlos’ eyes. Cecil’s eyes were wide, guilt and embarrassment discernable in every of his features. Carlos couldn’t keep in the laughter that had been bubbling in his chest as Cecil was rambling anymore, not with Cecil’s grave expression in this thoroughly ridiculous situation, and so he snorted out a laugh.

Cecil’s expression morphed into one of confusion and uncertainty, and Carlos tried to calm himself down. He took Cecil’s hands and squeezed them, stopping their slight shaking and catching his breath, as he looked at Cecil’s shocked face.

Carlos smiled reassuringly, “Cecil, I love you so very much.”

Cecil froze, before his face lit up, “I...I love you, too!”, his voice went soft at the edges, dreamy. However, doubt made its way back into his eyes quickly, “You...aren’t mad?”, he asked, voice unsteady.

Carlos chuckled, shaking his head. He considered telling Cecil that he could never be mad at him, but opted for something else instead, “Sweet Cecil, if anything I’m thankful.” Cecil cocked his head to the side, eyebrows raising in confusion and Carlos squeezed his hands again, if only to keep himself from pulling the other man into a kiss right then and there. He definitley couldn't be mad at the radio host, not when he was giving him an expression like this.

Carlos took a deep breath before trying to explain, “I was so nervous that night and I had carefully planned out all the things I could talk about but then when I actually was sitting across from you I couldn’t remember any of it and I was starting to sweat from nervousness and when I finally managed to get myself together enough to say something that stupid joke came out and I…”, Carlos chucked a little at the memory, “I was half expecting you to just get up and leave after that.”, Carlos had been terrified, panicking the moment he closed his mouth. It seemed silly now.

Carlos smiled at Cecil, now, “But you didn’t, you didn’t even roll your eyes, you just laughed and that just...put me at ease and suddenly there was no problem in just talking normally. In that moment, I was so very happy I made you laugh, it gave me the confidence to go on and try to enjoy the evening. And I did. Did you?”

Cecil, whose eyes had gone wide with awe, nodded enthusiastically. Carlos finally breached the gap and pressed his lips to Cecil’s. Cecil returned the kiss eagerly, hands coming up to play with Carlos’ hair, pulling the scientist closer. Carlos hummed contently into the kiss, cupping Cecil´s cheek.

When they had to pull apart for air, both were chuckling at the whole situation, at the idea that the other had been just as nervous that evening. Carlos leaned his head against Cecil’s shoulder, sighing happily. Cecil was still playing with the tips of his hair, his other hand coming to rest in his lab. Carlos took that hand, caressing the smooth skin with his thumb. The sigh from Cecil was one of utter bliss as he buried his nose in Carlos’ hair. Cecil felt light, his heart fluttering and happy and he still couldn’t quite wrap his head around this, the fact that he was holding his Carlos and that everything was okay and Carlos seemed content.

Cecil thought he might burst with love. He hoped he wouldn’t, it would make quite the mess of Carlos’ neat living room and he was sure that would not be appreciated. Also, it would be much harder to curl that wonderful hair around his fingers when his fingers were just a splash of blood and bone on the carpet. Cecil pressed his lips to Carlos’ head, before pulling away slightly so that he knew Carlos could hear him, “Will you explain the jokes to me? I want to try and understand them...”

“Oh, honey, if I did that you would realise just how bad they are. You would probably miss not understanding them…”, Carlos mumbled as an answer, shifting to look at Cecil's face.

“Mhm, but I want to know for future ones! I want to be able to react genuinely…”, Cecil smiled, pressing a kiss to Carlos' forehead.

Carlos laughed, that wonderful sound Cecil had been afraid he’d never hear again after telling him he'd been lying to him, “Cecil, you shouldn’t encourage my awful puns and jokes.”

Cecil looked into Carlos' beautiful, chocolate eyes, his own twinkling with mischief, “I think I just finished doing exactly that.”, he grinned, and Carlos couldn’t help but grin back.

Cecil leaned down, planting a kiss on Carlos’ beautiful nose. Carlos huffed out a little laugh before pulling Cecil into another kiss. Carlos felt light. This was perfection.

#welcome to night vale #wtnv #Cecilos #cecil palmer #carlos the scientist #fluff #awkwardness #cute #they're such dorks #painful puns #wtnv fanfic

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the-cydonian-texts · 4 years ago

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Playing with fire (Lee x Female Reader)

Summary: The only things you have in mind for tonight are drinking and dancing. But accidentally meeting Lee, one of your coworkers, adds a new set of fun activities to do on a Friday night.

Warnings: smut, swearing, pwp.

Words: 2985

Notes: This is something I wanted to write a long time ago when I watched this amazing show for the first time and got the hots for this psyscho.

I promise this is not as boring as it sounds. I just suck at writing summaries without giving out too much. Anyway... enjoy it you pervs ;)

Read it on AO3

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Friday night. You’re standing in a dark corner of some club, sipping nonchalantly from your glass, savoring the bittersweet flavor of your Gin and Tonic. Usually, you would be at home mixing your own drinks and chilling on the sofa to the tunes of your favorite music, but today was different. Call it gut feeling or whatever you like, but some invisible force was pushing you to go outside, find some underground club where no one would care about you, have a few drinks… and so you did.

So far, everything is going better than you thought it would. The place is almost dark except for some lights here and there; the music is loud and bassy, making your guts vibrate with every beat and getting you into some kind of reassuring trance. You smile to yourself as every single one of your worries disappear into the ether.

With one more sip of your glass, you decide it's time for a little fresh air. You walk through the dancefloor, gently pushing people away. Bodies squishing together to the rhythm of the music as you try to make your way to the door, away from the asphyxiating atmosphere inside the club.

Once you step outside, the freezing night air makes you gasp and shiver. It feels like a whole different world, almost completely quiet but for the muffled sound of the music escaping through the walls of the old looking building. Noticing that you weren’t the only one who needed to take a break, you walk to the back of the club, hoping to find some dark and empty spot where you can finally breathe and give your ears a little rest.

The cold brick wall feels strangely pleasant against your back when you lean against it. Tossing your empty glass away, you close your eyes, letting yourself get lost in the reinvigorating embrace of the chill breeze.

“Hey, you! I wasn’t expecting to see you here.” A very kind and soothing male voice abruptly overlaps the softened pulsation of the bass.

You gasp, turning your head around to face the man standing a couple of meters away from you. If you didn’t know him, you would probably either flip him off or punch him in the face for giving you such a shock, but you do know him and what he is capable of; having your guard up seems the only right thing to do.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to scare you.” The man says, closing the distance between both of you as he gives you a sweet apologetic smile. No one would ever think that such a handsome and charming man could be one of the most dangerous men you’ve ever crossed path with, but looks can be very deceiving.

“What are you doing here, Lee?” You say, preparing every muscle in your body to either fight or flight.

Lee snorts. “Relax, Y/N.” He says while taking a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. “We are on the same team, remember?” Lee adds, raising his eyebrows and innocently smiling like he didn’t know the reason behind your reaction.

In almost two years of working as an assassin for The Network, you and Lee have barely shared a couple of words. Most of the time, it comes to a simple “hi” when you accidentally meet in the HQ’s halls. All you know about him is that he and his partner Arby are the most skilled, cold-blooded, and twisted hitmen under Millner’s command. With that in mind, the fact that he’s now talking to you like you’re his best friend seems quite off, to say the least.

“Think I didn’t hear your answer.” You say, staring into his eyes, keeping every muscle in your face relaxed. You might be playing with fire, but don’t pretend to let it burn you to a crisp without fighting back.

“I just came to have a drink and listen to some music… Didn’t think the night was storing me such a pleasant surprise.” Lee replies calmly as his eyes move gradually from your face to your feet and back up.

“Yeah? What kind of surprise?” Your eyes, never leaving his as you move closer, showing him you’re also no-one to mess with. Almost wishing he strikes first. Your heart beats fast, pumping in your ears; your fists clenched with anticipation.

“Well… I ran into you.” Lee answers in a low voice. The gentle expression displayed early on his face disappears. His eyes focus on your mouth as he moves towards you, forcing you to step back until you hit the cold hard wall behind you. His body barely centimeters away from yours.

His sudden proximity makes your head spin. These could be your last moments, this might be the last time you fill your lungs with air and feel the wind on your skin; then, why aren’t you running away? What are you waiting for? The answer appears simple as you remember all those times you found yourself ogling Lee from afar when he didn’t notice. ‘Dangerous’ falls short when trying to describe him, but that never stopped you from getting hot every time you see him.

“I’m not gonna hurt you. I promise.” Lee’s hot whiskey-scented breath hits your face. His eyes meet yours before moving down to your lips, silently asking for your consent.

As much as you try to control the burning desire building up in your body, it becomes more unbearable by the second. In your profession, you’re not entitled to make mistakes or take unnecessary risks, but right now, it doesn’t matter. Being so close to Lee is driving you mad from arousal, and your body soon wins the battle against your common sense.

Heavily breathing, you close the distance between you and Lee until your lips are pressed against his. The hitman lets out a soft sigh once you begin gently caressing his cheeks. He moves his hands to your sides, running his fingers along your ribs and trailing circles with his fingertips on them. His touch is more tender and caring that you would expect from someone who’s made a name for himself as a vicious torturer.

Chills travel through your body from the feeling of his mouth against yours. His hands, leisurely massaging your torso, your lips moving in perfect synchrony, unhurriedly exploring every millimeter of each other’s mouths. Soft sighs of pleasure filling the air around you.

Absentmindedly, you let your hands slip slowly to his neck, feeling his quickened pulse and his muscles twitching under your light touch. Lee growls against your mouth as your hands continue moving along his chest, his arms, his shoulders, kneading and teasing him. You can’t help but notice how well built his body is, despite him having a slim silhouette. You wish you could strip him naked and feel his skin against yours. The mere thought of it increasing the tickling sensation between your legs.

The arousal almost palpable in the air makes it easy to notice how eager both of you are to fuck each other senseless. But you know pretty well that this might be the first and last time that you’d able to do so, which is why the two of you intend to make this moment last as long as possible. However, you and Lee are ticking bomb threatening to blow at any second.

Moved by his growing thirst, Lee licks your bottom lip, letting out a dark predatory chuckle when you cannot suppress an eager whimper. His hands began moving down you back, and you tremble with expectancy before they place on your buttocks, squeezing them firmly. He can feel himself growing inside his pants with every pleasing sound that comes out of your mouth, and every touch of your avid hands is like a torturing jolt of pleasure.

Desperate for more of this spellbinding thrill, Lee kisses his way to your neck in a painfully slow pace, pressing you tightly against his body. Your fingers tangle on his hair, and you let out a moan as he sucks at a quite sensible spot, savoring your salty skin.

“Shhh. Someone’s gonna hear us.” Lee’s deep voice makes you instantly tilt your head back, exposing your neck to him.

The wet sounds coming from Lee’s mouth as he continues kissing your neck, combined with his aroused sighs, stimulate your mind and body in a way you didn’t think possible. You’ve never been so focused on anything in your life like you are now on the swarm of intoxicating sensations you’re experiencing with Lee. Your previous sex encounters couldn't be compared to this moment, since what you feel for the hitman is way more lascivious and feral than anything you’ve felt for anyone before.

As the last speck of patience leaves your body, you bring Lee back to your mouth and kiss him fiercely. The hitman places a hand on your nape as he deepens the kiss. Tongues dancing and swirling together as your bodies squeeze against each other with desperation; Lee´s hard cock pressing against your thigh, and the pulsating sensation between your legs begging for relief. You lift one of your legs, putting it around Lee’s waist, who instantly gets your hint and begins grinding against you, rubbing your clit with his covered hard-on. Both of you gasp breaking the kiss; foreheads pressed together as you both pant and moan with every roll of Lee’s hips.

“Fuck, Lee… You’re so damn hard.” You pant, grabbing his ass and pulling him closer to you. The hitman opens his eyes and tilts his head back to look at you. Your half-lidded gazes meet, and just like yours, the man’s grey eyes are full of lust and animal desire waiting to be sated. Lee smiles mischievously before getting lost in your mouth again.

Eager to take things further, you let a hand wander down to Lee’s pants, unzipping them without hesitation and taking the hitman’s stiff cock in your hand. Lee let out a deep growl as your fingers wrap around his shaft, gently scrubbing his tip on your clothed core.

“Someone’s needy, huh?” Lee groans, closing his eyes as you move your hand up and down along his length, making sure you do it excruciatingly slow.

“Shut up.” You reply, licking your lips as you take a better look at the man’s erection while your hand works on it. The sight is so overwhelmingly erotic that it takes an incredible amount of will power to stop you from getting rid of your pants and impale yourself with his member.

“Yeah. Just like that, love.” He whispers before kissing you again, moaning against your lips as you slowly stroke him.

Delicately, you begin to spread his own pre-cum along his shaft to aid your movements. You continue teasing him, gradually increasing the pressure of your hand on it, and rubbing his head with your thumb to go down again. Lee’s breathing turns shallower by the second, and his muffled moans become louder. Eventually, he can take it any longer and breaks the kiss, placing his forehead on your cheek.

“Fuck…Wait, Y/N.” Lee lets out a long growl. “You’re gonna... make me come if you… keep it like that.” He says while trying to put himself together. You nod and let go of him. Bringing your attention to his neck, you slowly lick up to his earlobe, sucking and nibbling at it, noticing how his body trembles from arousal.

“Would you turn around for me, love?” Lee asks in a low husky tone, lightly brushing his lips against your ear, emphasizing his words with a roll of his hips. You moan and obey, putting a hand on the wall and placing your forehead against it; eyes shut with anticipation, your whole body aching for him.

A delighted chuckle comes out of the hitman’s mouth. He places his hands on your shoulders, gently squeezing and massaging them with his thumb, before moving them down your sides to grab your hips firmly, bringing himself to you. His chest pressed against your back, his hot breath on your ear. Lee kisses your neck as he unzips your pants, putting his hand inside your panties. His tongue swirling against your skin as two fingers begin rubbing your throbbing clit. You let out a pitched moan arching your back with pleasure, resting your head against Lee’s shoulder, as his fingers circle your nub skillfully.

“That good, love?” Lee asks, already knowing the answer. Another long moan from you reasserts his thoughts. Carefully, Lee slides two fingers inside your dripping entrance, his palm remaining in contact with your clit, as he wishes to stimulate you as much as possible.

“Oh, look how wet you are.” He growls breathlessly. His fingers undulate inside of you until he reaches that spot you were dying for him to find.

“Lee… Fuck!... Please… Don´t stop.” You moan desperately as a tingling sensation builds up inside you. You keep your eyes squeezed shut, one hand tangled in Lee’s hair while the other guides his remaining hand to cup one of your breasts. It doesn’t take long until you reach your orgasm, panting and moaning as the pressure is finally released in an explosion of pure bliss.

“Don’t think is all over, love.” Lee says once you come down from your orgasm. Both of his hands resting now on your chest. “You know I won’t be done until I make you scream.” He warns you.

The hitman’s words and the deep hoarse tone of his voice make you shudder. The tickling sensation and the heat between your legs gradually coming back as Lee caresses your breasts. He pinches your nipples over the fabric of your clothes and leaves wet kisses on your neck; nibbling and sucking in such a delicious way, you could swear he’s able to read your thoughts.

Lee pulls your pants down just enough to expose your butt to him; the soft skin of his member slightly brushing against yours makes you sigh with urgency. The hitman notices your frustration and begins running the tip of his fingers over the inner part of your thighs and up to your wet folds, spreading them apart.

“Are you ready for me, love?” Lee says, closing his eyes and nuzzling against your nape, hypnotized by the smell of your hair.

“I am... Damn, Lee… Do it now.” Your impatient whimper makes him chuckle.

With no intention of extending your wait, Lee places one of his hands on your lower belly, while the other takes hold of your hips. With a long-drawn-out growl, the hitman pushes himself slowly inside your soaked entrance. You cover your mouth, trying not to scream as you feel how every inch of his cock fills you and stretches your silky walls.

“Fuck, Y/N… you feel better… than I’ve ever imagined.” Lee huffs as he begins his thrusting, first pulling out, then going all the way back in at an agonizing pace. His heavy breathing on your nape and the vibration of his chest every time he groans makes you quiver.

“You’ve thought… a lot about me, then?” You ask while deliberately clenching your lower muscles around his shaft, smiling to yourself as you hear the surprised whine coming out of his mouth.

“More… then I’d like… to admit, love.” He replies, letting a hand finding its way under your shirt, stroking your abdomen, and making you gasp with delight at how soft his hands are. Once he has found the right pace, Lee’s fingers move back to your clit, gently tapping on it as he continues pushing into you, pleasingly hitting that spot that makes you melt. Lust can be such a powerful drug when you let it take control over your body, your decisions, your common sense…

“Lee...oh... Fuck me harder… Please!” You desperately beg when it all is becoming too much to handle. The hitman obeys driven by his own need, mercilessly pounding into you. He bites your neck as his own mind goes blank, submitting to a wild desire, strong enough to numb his logic.

Trembling, Lee’s hand reaches for your neck and wraps around it. His thrusts become gradually erratic; his hand leaves your nub to grab on your hips as his rigid cock plunge vigorously into your wetness. The hitman’s breathing turns irregular and shallow; his breathless curses accompanying your increasingly louder moans.

Suddenly, the flame burning inside of you grows bigger and bigger. Your legs began to shake, and your muscles tense when you reach the peak, screaming out Lee’s name as a powerful burst of ecstasy invades you. With a last strong push, Lee reaches his own climax releasing himself inside of you, and putting his arms around your waist, holding you tight while your orgasms wear out. A brief moment later, Lee kisses your neck one more time, slowly pulling out of you, resting his head on the back of yours until both of you can breathe normally again.

Once your body reconnects with your mind, you adjust your clothes and turn around to face Lee, meeting his eyes again. For a brief moment, none of you says a word as your minds are busy trying to assimilate what just happened while also attempting to decipher each other thoughts.

“Wanna go back inside? Drinks on me.” He finally says in a gentle tone, smiling expectantly.

“Sure!” You answer, smiling back at him and leading the way.

Consequences, if there’s any, must be taken into account, and you both know that. Your little encounter could affect your minds in ways you don’t even expect, and subsequently, your jobs could also be at risk. But you silently agree that right now is not the best moment to discuss such serious matters. For now, the only thing that should concern both of you is what drink are you gonna order at the bar.

#lee #utopia #paul ready #the terror #mr goodsir #smut #pwp #one shot #fanfiction #reader insert #female reader

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winchesterbrotherstan · 5 years ago

Text

SPN- No Exit (2.06)

Pairing: N/A, Olive Winchester (OC)

Summary: Ellen forces Jo to hand a new case over to the Winchesters, Dean has to protect yet another person, the siblings find out bad news, and Olive stands up for her boys

Warnings: cursing, a serial killer, blood, ghosts and stuff

Word Count: 5241

“Los Angeles, California.” Dean wiggled his eyebrows.

“What’s in L.A.?” I asked, following him out of the car.

“Young girl’s been kidnapped by an evil cult.”

“Yeah?” Sam raised his eyebrows. “Girl got a name?”

“Yeah.” Dean grinned. “Katie Holmes.”

Sam snorted as Dean giggled. “That’s funny. And for you, so bitchy.”

The sound of breaking glass and shouts came from inside the Roadhouse. I flinched and shuffled closer to Dean. Sam scooped Jinx out of the car.

“On the other hand…” He shrugged. “Catfight.”

“Hell no, that’s scary! Let’s just go. We can come back later.” I begged, tugging at Dean’s sleeve.

“Nope. Come on.” Dean dragged me toward the door.

“Sams?” I looked over my shoulder as I was helplessly pulled along.

He shrugged.

“I am your mother, I don’t have to be reasonable!” Ellen shouted as we slowly walked in.

“You can’t keep me here!” Jo yelled.

“Oh, don’t you bet on that, sweetie.”

“What are you gonna do, ma? Chain me up in the basement?”

“You know what, you’ve had worse ideas than that recently! Hey, you don’t wanna stay, don’t stay. Go back to school.” Ellen snarled.

The three of us cringed. Hearing that was worse than hearing nails on a chalkboard.

“I didn’t belong there!” Jo screamed. “I was a freak with a knife collection!”

“Yeah, and getting yourself killed on some dusty back road, that’s where you belong?” Ellen turned and saw the three of us.

Jinx whined, I froze like a deer in headlights, Dean squared his shoulders and avoided eye contact, and Sam scratched the back of his neck.

“Kids, bad time.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Sorry.”

“Yeah, we barely drink before ten anyways.”

“Wait.” Jo snapped. “I wanna know what they think about this.”

A couple walked through the door with their two kids, who were still little toddlers. They were obviously tourists, and they looked between Jo and Ellen with wide eyes.

“I don’t care what they think!”

“Are you guys open?”

“No!”

“Yes!”

The dad backed away. “We’ll just… check out the Arby’s down the road.”

The family left quickly, and the phone went off. Jo glared at it, and Ellen stalked over to answer. She snatched the phone up with a scowl. We sat down at the bar with heavy sighs from each.

“Harvelle’s. Yeah, Preacher.”

Jo shoved a manilla folder Dean’s way, and he backed up in his seat. “Three weeks ago a young girl disappears from a Philadelphia apartment.”

Dean only looked at the folder with wide eyes.

“Take it, it won’t bite.”

“No, but your mom might.” Dean whispered.

I took the folder from her and opened it up. “What else ya got, Jo?”

“This girl wasn't the first. Over the past eighty years six women have vanished. All from the same building, all young blondes. Only happens every decade or two so cops never eyeball the pattern. So we're either dealing with one very old serial killer, or…”

“Who put this together?” Dean looked over my shoulder. “Ash?”

“I did it myself.” Jo snapped.

I hummed. “Nice.”

“I mean, we have hit the road for a lot less.”

“Good.” Ellen hissed. “You like the case so much, you take it!”

“Mom!” Jo whined.

“Joanna Beth, this family has lost enough! I won’t lose you too… I just won’t.”

***

“I feel kind of bad…” Sam sighed. “Snaking Jo’s case.”

“Yeah, maybe she put together a good file. But could you see her out here actually working a case?” Dean raised an eyebrow.

Sam and I shrugged. Jinx tugged at the leash, and I pulled back. She wanted Dean, but Dean didn’t wanna hold the leash.

“Yeah, I don’t think so.”

Sam and Dean pulled out EMF readers and I looked high and low, my new glasses on.

“You getting anything?”

“No. Not yet.” Sam shook his head.

“Ol?”

“Nothing.”

Sam ran his EMF over a light switch, and it went off. He leaned over and squinted, looking disgusted.

“What’s that?”

“What’s what?” Dean and I crowded him.

Sam touched a black goo oozing from the switch, and I groaned. He huffed. Jinx jumped at our feet, snorting and sniffing. I touched the goo and groaned. I put my fingers down to let Jinx smell it. She pulled away with a loud whine. She dropped onto her stomach and ran her paws over her face.

“Holy crap.”

Dean reached over my head and touched it, rubbing his fingers together.

“That’s ectoplasm. Guys, I think I know what we’re dealing with here.” Dean got serious, then turned to us with a grin. “It’s the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.”

Sam rolled his eyes and I giggled.

“Dean, I’ve only seen this stuff like… twice. I mean, to make this shit, you’ve gotta be one majorly pissed off spirit.”

Dean sighed. “Alright, let’s find this badass before he snags any more girls.”

***

We rounded the corner and continued down the hallway. We heard two voices, and Dean reacted quickest, pulling us both to hide in a corner. Sam snatched Jinx off the floor and held her against his chest. She had gotten big, and Sam was the only one who could carry her without much of a struggle.

“It is so spacious! You know, my friend told me I absolutely have to come check it out, and I have to admit, she was right. You did a really good job with this place.”

I tilted my head and looked at Dean. He looked angry.

That’s Jo.

I nodded.

Definitely.

Dean stepped out first, catching them as they turned the corner.

“What the hell are you doing here?” He hissed in a low voice.

“There you are, honey.” Jo didn’t skip a beat, and she settled into Dean’s side with an arm around his waist.

Sam and I stood back, a bit confused. Jinx let out a whine as Sam put her down.

“This is my boyfriend Dean, his little sister Olive, and their buddy, Sam. This is our doggy! I’m so glad this place is pet friendly.” She grinned.

“Good to meet ya. Quite a gal you’ve got here.”

Dean slapped her ass and I cringed. I couldn’t exactly duck into Sam’s side, since I wasn’t his sister.

“Oh, yeah.” Dean smiled. “She’s a pistol.”

Sam flinched, and I stifled a snort. He was beyond pissed, the irritation dancing over his face was proof enough.

“So, did you already check out that apartment? The one for rent?” Jo smiled at me over her shoulder.

“Yeah. Yes, loved it.” Dean hummed.

“It’s got great flow.” I added.

“How’d you get in?” The landlord squinted at us.

“Oh, it was open.”

“Now, Ed, um, when did the last tenant move out?”

“Oh, about a month ago. Cut and run, too. Stiffed me for the rent.” He sighed.

“Well. Her loss, our gain! Cause if Deano loves it, it’s good enough for me!”

Sam and I shared a look, and Dean slapped Jo’s ass again. I shuddered. I caught the minuscule anger flashing behind his expression, but it was still gross to watch. I felt like I was gonna puke. Sam gave me a sympathetic smile.

Jo pulled out a wad of cash. “We’ll take it.”

***

“I’ll flip you for the sofa.” Jo turned to Dean as he finished cleaning his gun.

“Does your mother even know you’re here?” Dean spat back.

“Told her I was going to Vegas.” Jo grabbed the folder off the table.

Sam was sitting at the end, cleaning his shotgun. Dean was sitting on the table, his back to Jo. I was sitting on the table, opposite of Sam. I had my legs crossed and my new gun in my lap.

“You think she’s gonna buy that?”

“I’m not an idiot.” Jo spat. “I got Ash to lay a credit card trail all the way to the casinos.”

Sam and I shared a look over Dean’s shoulder.

“You know, you shouldn’t lie to your mom.” Dean chastised. “Shouldn’t be here either.”

Jo looked to Sam, expecting support. Sam met her eyes and said nothing as he continued to work on his shotgun. She huffed and turned to me. I shrugged, holding the gun in my hands and slowly flipping it over and over.

“Well, I am.” She snapped. “So untwist your boxers and deal with it.”

“Where’d you get all that money from, anyways?” Sam spoke.

“Working at the Roadhouse.”

“Hunters don’t tip well.” I got the courage to speak, too.

“Well, they aren’t that good at poker, either.” She smiled.

Dean’s phone went off and he climbed off the table so he could fish it out of his pocket. He flipped it open and put it up to his ear.

“Yeah?”

His face drained of color and he looked straight up at Jo. Jinx let out a howl, sensing his panic.

“Oh, hi, Ellen.” He walked around to my end of the table, lips curled up.

Jo went right at him as he held the phone to his shoulder. “I’m telling her.”

Jo hissed something back, and he looked ready to jump. Sam shot up, and I put the gun aside and swung my legs over the edge of the table, facing Dean and Jo.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Jo glared.

Dean put the phone back to his ear. “I haven’t seen her. Yeah, I-I’m sure.” A beat. “Absolutely.”

Jo shot Dean a cute little smile as he shut the phone, and he had murder in his eyes as he stared her down. Sam glanced over at me, and I shrugged.

***

“This place was built in 1924. It was originally a warehouse, converted to apartments a few months ago.” Jo had the blueprints open in front of her, and she was flipping a pocket knife around.

“Yeah? What was here before 1924?” Dean was pacing.

“Nothing.” She shook her head. “Empty field.”

“So, most likely scenario, someone died bloody in the building, and now he’s back and raising hell.” Sam didn’t look up from his own papers.

“I already checked. In the past eighty two years, zero violent deaths.” She shrugged. “Unless you count a janitor who slipped on a wet floor.” She turned and glared at Dean. “Would you sit down, please?”

Dean pulled out the chair next to me and sat on it, backwards. “So, have you checked police reports, county death records-”

“Obituaries, mortuary reports, and seven other sources. I know what I’m doing.”

I frowned.

Seven other sources? Where’d she get those?

“I think the jury’s still out on that one.”

Sam bit back a smile and I had to scratch my nose to hold myself together.

“Could you put the knife down?”

She did as he asked, and the tension, along with the bickering, was becoming unbearable.

“Okay!” Sam cleared his throat. “So, uh, it’s something else then. Maybe some kind of cursed object that brought a spirit with it.”

“Well, we’ve gotta scan the whole building then. Everywhere we can get to, right?” Jo looked between the three of us.

“Right. So. You and me, we’ll take the top two floors. Sam, get the first, Olive take the second.” Dean stood.

Sam and I nodded, and Jo scoffed.

“We’d move faster if we split up.” She got up and got in Dean’s face.

“Oh, this isn’t negotiable.” Dean had an irritated smile on his face.

“You know, I’ve had it up to here with your crap.” Jo spat.

I looked down at the floor, then up at Sam.

What do we do?

He gave me a small shrug.

I don’t know.

“Excuse me?”

“Your chauvinist crap. You think women can’t do the job!” She accused.

A snort escaped my nose, and she side-eyed me. Sam scratched his cheek, looking away. Dean gave his annoyed smile again.

“Sweetheart, this ain’t gender studies.” He shook his head. “Women can do the job fine.” He looked my way and shrugged. “Hell, I trust Olive with my life. She can do the job, I know she can. But amateurs can’t. You have no experience.”

She rolled her eyes, and I cleared my throat. I got up and pulled an EMF meter from the duffel on the table and called Jinx over.

“I’ll take her.”

Dean nodded, and I pressed a quick kiss to the side of Sam’s head.

“See you guys soon.”

***

The door busted open, and I rolled over, now fully awake. Jinx barked, and I realized she was curled up next to me. Dean had taken the couch, and I had fallen asleep on the floor, leaning next to him. Sam must’ve moved me to the bed.

“Where’s the coffee?” Dean grumbled.

“There are cops outside.” Sam’s voice rang out, and his panic was clear.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes. “What?”

“Another girl disappeared.”

“Shit.” Jo hissed.

“Alright, let’s move.” Dean clapped his hands.

“Wait, I’m not dressed.” I complained.

“You’re staying.”

“What? Why?” I stumbled out of the bed, socks sliding on the clean floor.

Dean caught me by the elbows and steadied me. “Get dressed. Take Jinx for a walk. Go get some coffee.” He pulled his wallet out of his pocket and handed me a twenty. “Be safe, okay? Love you.”

I blinked, trying to get my eyes clear. “Love you too.”

He kissed my head and gathered his things. Sam pressed a kiss to my forehead, and Jo gave me a soft smile.

“Be careful, guys!” I called as they walked out the door.

***

Sam and Jo were looking over the notes, and I was digging into the history of this part of Philadelphia, which was proving more work than I had anticipated. Dean slid back into the room and shut the door behind himself. Jinx jumped up and ran to greet him.

“Teresa Ellis. Apartment 2F. Boyfriend reported her missing around dawn.” He spoke as he bent down to pet Jinx.

“What about her apartment?” Jo looked up.

“Cracks all over the plaster, wall, ceiling. Ectoplasm, too.”

“Well, between that and the hair you guys found in the vent, I’d say this fucker’s coming from the walls.” Sam sighed.

“Yeah, but who is it?” Dean began to pace. “Building’s history is totally clean.”

I huffed as I stumbled upon something. “We’re looking in the wrong place.”

The three of them turned to squint at me.

“What?”

“We’re next door to a prison. Moyamensing prison. Built in 1835, torn down about forty years ago. They used to execute people by hanging them in the empty field.”

“Which is where this building was built.” Jo put it together.

I nodded. “Well, then, we’ll need a list. All the people executed here.”

“I’ll see what I can dig up.” I turned my focus back to the laptop.

“I’ll call Ash, see what he can get.”

***

“A hundred and fifty seven names?” Sam groaned as we scrolled down the list.

“We’ve gotta narrow this down, or we’ll be digging up graves for the next month.” I pinched the bridge of my nose.

“Yeah.” Sam sighed.

Sam noticed something on the list and tapped my hand. I stopped scrolling and looked up at him.

“What is it, Sams?”

“Herman Webster Mudgett…” He clicked on the name with a frown.

“Yeah?” Jo asked.

“Oh, shit…”

“Wasn’t that H.H. Holmes’s real name?”

“You’ve gotta be fucking me.” Dean came and sat next to us, eyes on the screen.

“Oh my god.” I breathed out as I pulled up a search on him. “He was executed at Moyamensing. May seventh, 1896.”

“H. H. Holmes himself…” Sam sighed. “Come on, I mean… what are the odds?”

“Wait, who is this guy?” Jo’s eyebrows were furrowed.

“The term multi-murderer.” Dean sighed. “They coined it to describe Holmes.”

“He was America’s first serial killer. Before anybody even knew what a serial killer was.”

“Yeah. He confessed to twenty seven murders. They could only confirm nine, some of the people he claimed to have killed were still alive, and the police put the death toll at over two hundred.”

“Oh, and his victim flavor of choice? Pretty petite blondes.” Dean grunted. “He used chloroform to kill em.” He squinted as he began to think. “Which is what I smelled in the hallway last night. At his place, police found human remains, bone fragments, and long locks of bloody blonde hair.”

“Well, Jo.” I hummed. “You sure know how to pick em.”

“We just find the bones, salt them, and burn them. Right?”

I shook my head as I scrolled through the article. “Not that easy. His body is buried across town, but it’s encased in a couple tons of concrete.”

“What? Why?”

“Story goes that he didn’t want anybody mutilating his corpse. Cause… ya know… that’s what he used to do.”

“Guys, we might have an even bigger problem.” Sam noted.

“How does this get bigger?”

“Holmes built an apartment building in Chicago. He called it the Murder Castle. The whole place was a death factory. Trap doors, acid vats, quicklime pits. He built secret chambers inside the walls. He’d lock his victims in, keep them alive for days. Some would suffocate, others would starve to death.”

“Fuck. That means Teresa could be alive.”

Dean sat up straight. “Alright, we need sledgehammers, crowbars. We’ve gotta smash these walls, anywhere thick enough to hide a girl.”

“Okay. How are we doing this?”

“Jo and I will take the top two floors. Olive, I want you with Sam. You two check the bottom floors.”

I sighed. “It’ll be faster if we split up like we did last time. I’m not blonde, chances are he won’t come after me.”

Dean shook his head. “Not taking any chances.” He turned and shared a look with Sam.

Neither said a word, but I knew what was going on.

We protect them, no matter what.

Sam gave the slightly nod.

Of course.

***

“Okay. Call us after you finish checking out the southeast wall.”

“Will do, Jo. Be careful.” I hung the phone up and turned to Sam with a heavy sigh. “They haven’t found shit either.”

He sighed and swept the EMF meter over my head. “What if we’re wrong? What if he doesn’t hide his victims in the walls?”

I shrugged. “I dunno, Sams. We’ve only got a little left. If nobody finds anything, we’ll reassess.”

He nodded. “Alright. Come on.”

***

I heard the sound of hurried footsteps before I saw anything, and I squared my shoulders, ready to take somebody on. Dean rounded the corner and slammed into my shoulder, sending me stumbling backward into Sam.

“Hey!”

“De?”

He turned back to us, face pale. “He’s got Jo.”

“What?”

“I wasn’t with her.” Dean began to panic. “I left her alone. Damn it!”

“Hey, hey, hey.” Sam tried to calm him. “We’ll find her, alright?”

“Where?” Dean growled.

“Inside the walls, Dean.”

“We’ve been inside the walls all night! None of the other girls were there, she won’t be either!”

“Okay. Come on.” I grabbed his hand and began to tug him toward the stairs.

“What are you doing, Olive? We’ve gotta-”

“Right now, we’ve gotta calm down and reassess the whole situation. Maybe we got something wrong, maybe we missed something. Either way, we won’t find Jo right now, not like this. We need to calm down first. Okay? Let’s go.”

***

“Maybe we got Holmes’ MO wrong.” Sam spoke calmly. “We just have to take a beat and think about this.”

Dean was pacing. “Yeah, well, we’d better think fucking fast.”

I sighed. Dean was totally freaked, because he thought this was his fault. No matter how this ended, he was going to blame himself. His phone rang, and he flipped it open.

“Yeah.”

He stopped cold and looked ready to burst into tears. I squinted at him. He put the phone on speaker and set it down on the table.

“You lied to me. She’s there.”

“Ellen-” Dean tried.

“No! Ash told me everything. Man’s a genius, but he folds like a cheap suit. Now you put my damn daughter on the phone.”

“She’s gonna have to call you back, she uh… she’s taking care of some lady business.” Dean gritted his teeth.

“Yeah, right. Where is she?”

The three of us stared at each other, each calculating.

“Where is she!”

“Look, we’ll get her back.” Dean blurted.

Sam and I glared with wide eyes, shocked.

“Get her back? Back from what?”

“Ellen, the spirit we’re hunting, it took her.” He explained.

“Oh my god.”

“She’ll be okay. I promise.” Dean spoke, and it was more than a promise.

This was an oath. He was swearing right now.

“You promise.” She growled. “That is not the first time I’ve heard that from a Winchester.”

“What?” I spoke up, now confused, and angry with her accusatory tone.

Sam knocked my arm and shook his head. I sighed and he nodded me over, pushing his laptop my way. I squinted at the blueprints of the murder castle and sighed.

“If anything happens to her…”

“It won’t. I won’t let it. Ellen, I’m sorry, I really am.”

“I’m taking the first flight out. I’ll be there in a few hours.”

The line cut off, and Dean let out a small string of curses. He turned to us with gleaming eyes.

“Hey.” I caught his attention. “This isn’t on you.”

“There’s nothing you could’ve done, don’t beat yourself up.” Sam spoke softly.

“Please tell me you’ve got something.”

“Look, you look at the layout of the Holmes murder castle, there’s all the torture chambers inside the walls, right?”

“Right.”

“But there’s one we haven’t considered yet. The basement.”

What Sam had shown me now clicked.

“This place doesn’t have a basement.”

“No, but there’s an old sewer system that looks like it hasn’t been touched-”

“Let’s go.” Dean cut me off and picked up his car keys.

***

Sam swept a metal detector over the street as we walked. Dean had the shovel in his hand, and I had the backpack with our weapons on. Jinx tugged on her leash. If we died down there, she was safer above ground than in a haunted apartment. Sam caught something and looked, beckoning for us to follow. I hooked a finger on Dean’s belt loop as we followed the trail through an alley, and into an empty field. Sam stopped, and the metal detector let out a steady squeal.

“Here.”

Dean went to work, digging faster than I had ever seen. I shared a look with Sam. It took Dean four minutes before he hit metal and dropped to his knees. Sam dug with his good hand, and I went at it with both, feeling dirt crunch its way under my fingernails.

“Come help, girl.” Dean whistled.

Jinx made her way next to Sam and went wild, dirt flying behind her.

“Alright, here.” Dean stopped us and pushed at Jinx once we hit a metal trap door.

I dug through the backpack and handed Sam a shotgun first. He cocked it, and I handed another one to Dean. Sam looked around, making sure there was nobody watching. Dean tied Jinx’s leash to the bar of the door and patted her head. Sam planted a kiss on Jinx’s head before heading down.

“We’ll be back, girl.” I whispered as I fished out the last shotgun.

She whined, and I checked the flashlight before following after the boys.

***

I heard Jo, clear as day, trying to scream. I pushed Sam’s foot, and he grunted, getting the message. Dean reached the clearing first and got to his feet, followed by Sam.

“Hey!”

Dean’s voice, and then a gunshot. Another girl screamed.

“Jo!”

“I’m here!”

Dean looked around, scrambling to find something. I spotted a bar of rebar and snatched it up. My teeth cracked in my jaw, and I groaned as I pushed Dean aside. I wedged the bar into the opening of Jo’s compartment with a deep breath.

“Ol-”

“Go help Sam.”

“Are-”

“Go help Sam.” I closed my eyes and took another deep breath.

The boys became background noise, and a low growl resonated in my throat. I balanced myself before turning and gripping the bar. I pulled as hard and fast as I could, and another growl ripped its way past my mouth. Jo squealed as the door popped off.

“Boys!” I shouted, getting their attention so I could hand the bar off.

I helped Jo scramble to her feet with a heavy sigh.

“Okay, are you alright?”

“Been better.” She eyed my fangs, but said nothing about them. “Let’s get out of here before he comes back.”

“Actually, I uh…” Dean turned with a huff as Sam helped Teresa get free. “I don’t think you’re leaving here just yet.”

“What?” Jo’s eyes went wide.

“Remember when we said you being bait was a stupid plan?” I asked, scratching the back of my neck. “Well, right now it’s kinda the only one we’ve got.”

The three of us turned to Sam. He had Teresa in a hug. She was shaking. He gave a pout and a bitchface, and I sighed. Dean shrugged.

Jo sighed. “Fine.”

***

Jo sat in the middle of the chamber. She was silent, but she was trembling. She had her arms wrapped around her knees, but was taking deep and steady breaths. I didn’t see Holmes until he materialized behind her. I made a mental note to not rely on these glasses.

Holmes got closer, and closer, until he was standing right behind her.

“Now!” Dean shouted.

I lunged forward to tug Jo to safety as Sam and Dean shot at the walls. Bags of salt unfurled, trapping Holmes in a perfect circle. Jo shook in my arms as Holmes began to pace, screaming in terror and mumbling gibberish.

“Scream all you want, you dick! There’s no way you’re stepping over that salt!” Jo turned and howled.

“Alright. Come on. Let’s go, we’ve gotta get Teresa out of here.” Sam whispered, guiding us out.

***

I sat in the grass and scratched Jinx’s chest. She was sitting between me and Sam. He was standing with Jo at the entrance of the sewer, looking down into the darkness.

“So. This job as glamorous as you thought it would be?” Sam teased.

“Well, except for all the pee-your-pants terror, yeah. But the girl’s gonna live a life because of us. It’s worth it.”

“Yeah.” Sam and I agreed. “It is.”

“Hey, what if somebody finds that sewer down there? Or a storm washes the salt away?” Jo pointed out.

Sam grinned. “Both very fine points. Which is why we’re waiting here.”

“For what?”

The beeping of a truck backing up went off, and Sam broke into a smile. I got to my feet and slid into his side as we watched a cement mixer back into the field. Jinx barked, and I handed her off to Sam as I guided Dean.

“For that.”

I beckoned with my hand, and then made a fist. He stopped right over the sewer entrance. Dean hopped out of the cab with a proud smile on his face. He and Sam set up the mixer right over the entrance.

“You ripped off a cement truck?” Jo was astonished.

“We’ll give it back.” I grinned as the cement began to pour.

Dean threw an arm over my shoulders and sighed. “Well, that oughta keep him down there til hell freezes over.”

***

I shifted, uncomfortable. Jinx was sprawled over my lap and Sam’s. Her haunches were pressing on my bladder, and I felt like I was gonna pee myself. Dean was in the driver’s seat, and Ellen was next to him, in the passenger seat. Jo was to my left, behind Dean, and Sam was on my other side, behind Ellen. She was staring straight ahead, jaw set. Dean kept glancing her way, looking horrified.

“Boy, you… you really weren’t kidding about flying out, were you?” He chuckled nervously.

She said absolutely nothing, and Dean glanced at me in the rearview. I looked up at Sam, who was also uncomfortable.

“How about we listen to some music?” Dean tried, and flicked the radio on.

Before the first string of lyrics could come on, Ellen turned it back off. Sam and I looked at each other again, and Dean did the same, begging for help. I shrugged, and he sighed.

“This is gonna be a long drive.”

***

Ellen had Jo by the shoulder, and the three of us scrambled to follow.

“Ellen? This is my fault. Okay? I lied to you, and I’m sorry. But Jo did good out there, I think her dad would be really proud.”

Ellen turned around with a snarl, and the three of us skidded to a stop.

“Don’t you dare say that. Not you. I need a moment with my daughter. Alone.” She snapped.

I gulped as Sam and Dean exchanged a look over my head. Sam pulled me along as they trailed out of the Roadhouse. We leaned against the car and said nothing. We couldn’t hear them fighting, but we knew it was going to be bad. There was a strangled cry, and the four of us, including Jinx, perked up. Jo stormed out of the Roadhouse, shot Dean a glare, and kept walking.

“That bad, huh?”

“Not right now.” Jo snapped.

“What happened?” Dean tried. “Hey, talk to me.” He reached for her arm.

“Get off me!”

He backed up. “Sorry. I’ll see you around.” He turned back to us with a confused look on his face.

“Dean!” Jo called. “It turns out my dad had a partner on his last hunt. Funny, he usually worked alone… this guy did too, but… I guess my dad trusted him. Mistake. Guy screwed up, got my dad killed.”

“What does this have to do-’

“It was your father, Dean.” Jo hissed.

“What?”

I felt my heart drop, and Sam gasped.

“John got my dad killed.”

Dean talked again, but I couldn’t hear it. I squirmed away from Sam and stormed into the building. I ignored him as he called after me. I slammed a hand down on the bar and leaned forward, catching Ellen’s attention.

“Look.” I started, tears already forming in my eyes, throat aching. “I am so sorry that my father cost your husband his life. I really am. John was everything I never want to be. But my brothers?”

The tears became too many, and they began to stream down my cheeks.

“My brothers are a completely different story. Those boys are nothing like John. Those boys would do anything for anybody. The second time the three of us hunted together, Sam put himself between a wendigo and three innocent people, even though he knew it would only buy them seconds. Dean ran through the tunnels…” My voice broke. “Defenseless. Just to get them out alive.If saving Jo meant putting their own lives down, they would do it. Without hesitation. So I’m really sorry about what my father did. But don’t you ever think, not even for a second, that my boys wouldn’t die to save someone else.”

Ellen blinked, staring at me. I sniffled, wiped my tears, and backed up.

“That’s all I needed you to hear.”

I stumbled out of the building. Sam and Dean were on the porch. Jo was nowhere to be seen. I fell into the boys, shaking. Neither said anything as they held me.

“Let’s go home.”

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