#do you see my vision. it's never coming to fruition but do you see it nonetheless

[microwaving-tesilid-argente]

no ok but like from tesilid's pov you spend your childhood subjected constraints on your life and suddenly this girl is exempt from those constraints and you can actually be frank around her. (and she gives you great food!) you recognise that she can be a really important person in your life and whenever you're having a particularly shit day you remember her and you can't wait to travel so you can meet her again but before you can she saves you at your worst moment yet again and promises that it's ok if you forget her because she'll find you. internally you might've been like 'why the fuck would i forget you but okay' but then she doesn't find you and you spend death upon death being betrayed and stepped on and having your spirit and humanity crushed and she still hasn't found you yet (i'm here, where are you?) and then you give up and then you find her but its too late then you give up worse then she finds you and you realise once again that in the time you've been apart she has dedicated her life to becoming a strong healer for you, the role you had always desperately needed in your expedition team, and also she's so strong that she can solo dungeons so you don't have to, and also while she very clearly wants you to sit back and relax while she does everything she is also mindful about respecting your autonomy and not making you feel useless, and also she would readily exchange her life for yours, where has she been all your lives? but she's here now,

how is tesilid supposed to be anything but completely obsessed with her. i love this romance plot they just keep finding ways to give the other even more reasons to be obsessed with them.

actually i need to spend time cracking ailette's head open too because she's also obsessed with tesilid but i can't actually figure out why. like yes being strong enough to survive was always a concern, but somehow her priority keeps going back to whatever will bring tesilid the most comfort. she chose the healer class for him, and only became a fighter too when she realised she needed it for survival.

[kairiscorner]

the man, the myth, the legend himself dr ratio veritas ... is now made public !!

fyi . . . i have a bot request form you guys can send requests to !! updates are slow, i apologize (⁠｡⁠ŏ⁠﹏⁠ŏ⁠) but i'll try my best to get through them, and i will only do requests that fall within my comfort zone !!

DR. VERITAS RATIO

“if one day your brain shows symptoms

of dullness, then please

give the doctor a call.”

ᯓ★ catching a glimpse of him working out.

you couldn't, for the life of you, tolerate such an arrogant and narcissistic smartass like veritas ratio... but oh, you wouldn't mind seeing those muscles and that handsome face of his again, even if he himself pissed you off. luckily (or unluckily) for you, your little trip of seeing him at the gym to hand over some important documents gave you quite a good view of this egotistical man.

ᯓ★ he couldn't understand you.

to dr ratio, nobody in that damned guild really lived up to the vision he hoped; none of them shared the same sentiment or kind of intellect he possessed, and it made him frustrated and somewhat... lonely.

that was, until he met you. he had acknowledged nobody before as a genius, nobody but himself, until there was you. but there was one thing this genius couldn't decipher about you... and it was the fact you did not seek to eradicate the plague of ignorance with him in the intelligentsia guild.

why, oh why, did you reject his offer to expand the universe's knowledge with the greats... only to be a humble servant for others?

ᯓ★ your academic rival.

veritas ratio prided himself on the fact that nobody could come close to his achievements and intellect at his university, he was just that good at everything he did.

however... you ruined his peace of mind and decided to give him a run for his money by taking his spot as the top student last semester by a few points.

though, as much as you both had a mutual distaste and rivalry for each other going on... you two were paired together for an important project. and of course... you had to work together. hooray.

ᯓ★ nobody thought he would be a family man.

not a single soul that knew dr ratio ever had the feeling that he would settle down with someone he would love more than himself, than his books, theses, and knowledge–let alone have a child with them.

however, you and your child with him are living proof that even a man as cold and critical as him are capable of loving and finding their purpose as not only a scholar, a professor, a doctor... but as a parent.

ᯓ★ your ex husband.

after being married to dr veritas ratio for three years and ending your union with him after such a fruitless and one-sided relationship... you had felt so liberated, as if all those years with him were just a bad memory for you.

however, when you went out to dinner at a high-end classy restaurant, the very last thing on your mind that time was the chance of you seeing your ex husband again... only for that one slim chance to come to fruition, with you being face to face with the man who seemed to never love you when you two were together.

his amber eyes gazed back at yours with a hint of longing in them, of endless nights of longing for you, his ex spouse...

ᯓ★ he wants to be your only one.

dr veritas ratio is a universal level problem solver; capable of engineering such helpful devices that saves planets and star systems across the galaxy, delegating on important issues for the good of humanity, and an important doctor that alleviates the malady of ignorance... with 8 PhDs to his very famous and well-known name.

...it shouldn't bother him this much that you're so obsessed and giggly about a bunch of pixels across your screen that utter binary code that translates into words you comprehend... right?

then why is it that as he tries to relax in his bathtub that he can't seem to get that release he's seeking from the pent-up frustration he gets when a character from your favorite game compliments you, gives you gifts, or... says they want you to be theirs. surely, he can find a solution to this finicky problem he has to make you his again, no...?

[endless-ineffabilities]

there's hope for us yet - (2/2)

Anakin Skywalker x f!reader

The reader realizes that her true Anakin will always exist, in some spark or another, however miniscule. And she reconciles with what she must do in order to get him back.

masterlist ▪︎ part one

GIF by nerdside

When your eyes open once more, you're lying on something soft.

A sense of familiarity eases in as your fingertips glide on the silk sheets underneath you. And that scent. Which can only be...

"What were you dreaming about?"

Your head falls to the side, slowly, dreading what you'll see. Because you know, without a doubt, it's all going to break your heart.

Anakin lies on his side, with his torso bare and his head propped up on one sturdy arm, looking at you all starry-eyed.

Like he always had.

You can help but let out a shaky sigh. Why did I have to lose this? Why did I have to lose you?

He notices the switch in your expression. And as if he's heard your thoughts, he whispers, "I'm here, stardust. I'm never leaving you."

But you did.

You sit up halfway, and find yourself saying, "What about all that you said? About Senator Palpatine? If you... if you truly believe that, Ani, then I could... " I could lose you. Your words echo in your head. He must have heard them to be meaningless ploys.

"You don't understand, stardust. I'm doing this for us. For you! This way, we can be together forever. Nothing can take you from me."

You lean forward, gripping his hand tightly. "Nothing will, Ani. Your visions won't come into fruition. You're not gonna get rid of me that easy, you know." You smirk at him to assuage his concerns, but his frown stays in place.

You massage your thumb in between his ruffled brows, in a show of easing the tension in his expression. "I love you," you breathe.

"I love you, stardust," he says, his voice breaking with emotion. He presses his forehead to yours. And then, his lips on your own.

His breathing is heavy, his mouth frantic. His hair falls forward, casting shadows on the sharp angles of his face.

I love you, he keeps saying. Though he claims your lips again and again, before you can get the chance to say it back.

Your fingers tangle in his unruly blonde tresses, anchoring themselves as he slides down and nips at your collarbone. His hand dips inside your blouse, gently pawing at your chest.

When he looks up at you with his mischievous smirk, you nearly forget where you are. You want to.

"Ani..."

I want this to be real.

"It is real," Anakin responds without missing a beat. He lowers himself further, hands gripping your hips. His fingers trace a line underneath the waistband of your trousers. "Give in to me, my stardust. This can be as real as we want it to be."

"Now is not the time..." Your words halt when he presses his lips to your hipbone.

"Why not?" Anakin purrs, then proceeds anyway. His breathing is warm against your skin, as he carefully starts to undo your trousers.

It certainly feels real. Any world, any reality - Anakin Skywalker will always have the ability to set you afire.

Your stomach is in knots, in equal parts excitement and anxiety. You want to focus on him and only him, but your gaze is directed towards the ceiling. Or lack thereof. All you see is an apparent simulation of the night sky, with thick gray clouds to reveal a storm simmering and waiting to unfold.

You were so caught up in Anakin that you failed to notice your surroundings.

"Where are we, Anakin? This isn't your suite."

He sighs, shaking his head. "That's what you're thinking about?"

Lightning flashes overhead. Dread rips into you as it casts a glow above everything. It had been only for a split second, but it was enough.

The sky glowed red. You see much clearer now.

"Let me take your mind off it, stardust." Anakin had pulled himself up suddenly, covering your line of sight. Everything, like always, is just him.

He grips your jaw in one hand, forcing you to look right at him.

"Anakin..." your voice is a low warning him. You notice how it sounded more of a question. Your guard is up, your hands bunched up into fists at your sides, no longer lovingly pressed against him. Suddenly, the comforting feel of the silk sheets feels like a betrayal. A lie.

"Kiss me," Anakin purrs. His lips take yours, roughly. His teeth clashing against yours in the movement. "This is all I want. You're all that I want." He grows frustrated when you don't kiss him back. Almost rabid. One hand keeps your face against him, while the other freely roams all over your body. His fingernails dig into the flesh of your thighs. "Say you're mine."

"No," you struggle to take a breath, squirming underneath his solid form. "You wanted something more. And now you have it."

"Because of you," he implores. "I did everything for you."

"I never wanted you to cross over into the dark side." Rage is evident in your shaking voice. You find your strength and propel yourself from underneath him, footsteps carrying you away from the bed. He follows suit but you put your hand up. "Stop." He doesn't listen. When has he ever?

For me? How dare he blame me?

Anakin reaches you once more, looking pained. That familiar frustrated furrow in his brow making him look youthful. Almost vulnerable.

Like that brazen young Padawan whom you met a long time ago. The one you fell in love with.

You wait for him to speak. To begin his tirade. He was fuming just a minute ago, surely he has some lovely things to share. About the past. About what you lost. What he sacrificed it all for.

The new Empire. Palpatine. Darth Vader.

Each one a dagger right through your heart. Reminding yourself that he did not choose you.

But he was lost.

You shake your head at your resolve breaking. One look at his broken expression and it all falls down.

He was lost. He was manipulated.

"Forgive me, stardust." Anakin says. His forehead presses against yours, and he holds you close. The makeshift sky above you seemingly calms, no longer displaying the occassional flash of crimson red. You feel the tension leave your body, and nearly slump against him.

A minute passes before he finally speaks again, "I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for any of this."

You know full well that he apologizes for much more than causing you to grow irate moments ago. He means everything.

"I know," you finally admit. Your eyes flit over his features. His eyes gently shut, his fingertips memorizing the planes of your face. "But this... this was the end."

"Well," he slowly smiles, and it is one of both sadness and acceptance. But when his eyes hold yours, it betrays the Anakin that would never accept defeat, who would never relent to losing the one he loves forever. "Why don't we go back to the beginning?"

The scene fades before your eyes, but Anakin remains.

And he always will.

It is the day after your thirteenth nameday, and your Master has granted you leave for the entire week.

It gives you the chance to interact with the visiting Padawans from other Jedi Temples, but you find yourself sitting all alone in an alcove in the inner courtyard.

Training has not been easy as of late, and you're beginning to doubt whether you deserve to be in the Jedi Order at all.

Lost in thought, you make the hilt of your lightsaber hover to the side. Spinning it midair. Tapping it against the stone in a sporadic rhythm.

Maybe if I fail, I can make a living off of these party tricks.

Then a voice breaks you out of it. "That won't be much of a living, but I have a better idea."

The boy you will soon know to be Anakin stands there, with his sandy mop of hair along with its signature Padawan braid, and curious gaze. He looks to be about your age, but already much taller.

"Stay out of my head." You respond on instinct, letting annoyance win over.

"Don't you want to know what I had in mind?" He sits across from you, unfazed. Clearly this is a kid who holds himself in some high regard. His force feels like determination and honour.

And defiance, as well as a simmering fury, but you will find this out much later.

"Not really," you shrug, trying to play coy. Your interest is piqued, but you're still discomforted by the thought that this random Padawan is tuning in to your deepest emotions.

"Well," he sighs. Something tells you it didn't really matter what your response was. "I was thinking that I can help you train. I can feel that the Force is strong with you, as it is with me."

"Is it, now?" The pair on this guy. But he's right. He has the power to bring balance to the galaxy. He just doesn't believe it yet.

"It is. And trust me, I tend to be right about these things." He smiles, and it is one of boyish innocence and wonder. Years later, he will change, but you will find that his smile remains the same.

You shake his hand in introduction, and you fall into conversation. How long is he visiting your Jedi Temple? Where did he come from? How is he finding his training?

It's polite conversation. It's a normal afternoon.

But it's also the beginning of everything.

"Come find me," he says to you, before he leaves.

"I will."

As he walks away, you notice a cloud of smoke encroaching upon him. White tendrils twisting in a race to get to him. Anakin. You blink hard, trying to get clear of the haze. His figure is morphed, doubled in size. Something's not right.

The white tendrils turn red. Darkness creeps in from all sides, and you know there is danger here.

"Wait!" You scream out. I have to warn him.

You take sure, long strides toward his figure and your bones ache. You're certainly taller now, and stronger. Much older than your thirteen years.

"Anakin, wait!"

He turns, and it is not Anakin. You freeze upon seeing the unfamiliar being, towering over everything, dark mask firmly in place.

Darth Vader. You realize just where you are, and why you're here, running around moments of impermanence.

He starts to speak, and you're startled to hear that the voice does not come from Vader's deep, chilling synthesizer.

"Come find me," he repeats. It's Anakin's voice. The one you've always known.

"I will," you say once more, the meaning of the words renewed.

And then everything is lost in a blinding flash of light.

You find yourself back on the suspended path, amidst millions of the same pathways to memories and forms of reality. The galaxy stretches eternal, the stars unending.

Anakin stands calmly before you, as he did when you arrived.

"You have to go back, stardust. Ahsoka needs you."

"I know," you say, not willing to say goodbye, but there's no other choice. You take his hands, committing the feeling to memory, and he rests his forehead against yours.

"Will you come find me?"

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"I always will."

[esoteriamaya]

Neptune Placements and Subconscious Manifestation

Neptunians have a calling in their souls path that utilizes the subconscious prowells of the underworld and higher realms of reality.

Everything is subconscious before it is materialized, so neptunians have a great understanding of this at birth. The beauty of this is that once they learn how to stay afloat in a reality that tries to force them to be grounded, they will be able to use their brain to conquer the reality they wish to receive in this lifetime.

With that being said, let me explain how everyone with neptune placements can utilize their gifts in order to receive the reality they want for themselves, as well as knowing how to appreciate the things their subconscious mind is able to do and magnetize to them.

I will say that nothing is impossible, because with the mind all can be possible if you just believe. Neptune rules the higher heart, it allows us to see the beyond of something we believe as impossible to be possible. With the use of our pineal glands (neptune/uranus) we can see more of anything in the horizon even if its not able to be seen first hand, with effort and practice.the world can be ours.

Sun/Neptune - When it comes to your subconscious mind, it has much to do with the way you express yourself into the world. If you want a dancer, a lawyer, a scientist, etc. Before it materializes you must act it out BEFORE it can arrive to you. Think of the law of attraction (which neptune rules over) and think about how you'd be if you were these things already. Your brain doesn't know the difference between you having this thing or not, it responds to the nature of doing something and receive information on how to expand the consciousness on that desire. Being your true self helps you get into alignment with the thing that you want.

Pay attention to how you act when you are around others because this is reflective of your imagination, not theirs. With neptunians it is easy for people to take in people’s projections of them and it can mess with your imagination, however, we still have control on we’re our subconscious reality goes.

Moon/Neptune is reflective on your emotional state. For example, you want to feel joy, right? What happens if you never felt joy ever? You would have to force yourself into that roll. It might sound goofy at first but with practice you will realize that energy doesn’t lie, and our emotions are connecting to energy.. good bad and neutral.

The beauty with this placement is how well these individuals can alchemize their emotions and transform it into something that they want in the material/physical reality. So if I want more joy and I never felt it before but I know it’s a form of happiness, Im going to “pretend” to be joyous and when I keep doing this it’ll begin to reflect into my reality therefore REAL joy can come into fruition. It just takes time n effort. And with said effort of mastering the alchemy of my own emotions, I could then create a reality out of this energy (our emotions are = energy) thus moving me into a vibration of more joy where I can attract what I want into the form of whatever it is I desire. I just have to seek out joy.

With this placement though, a lot of times what you want to create doesn’t have a actual look, mostly a vibe. So sometimes you have to reflect on the feeling of it and not just the look. “Follow the energy” would be my final word to you all.

Neptune/ASC has a lot to do with shapeshifting yourself into the reality that you want. It also has a lot to do with being consciously aware of the choices that you are making, and making moves toward the direction of your desire. I’m going to use miss Marilyn Monroe as an example. Monroe, a neptune/asc in leo had a vision that she would be a star. Before we knew her as Marilyn, she was norma jean with brunette hair and a pretty smile. Once she transformed her look, hair, and character it was at this moment she would be the world famous superstar of our time. She talked about how she used her mind and pretended she was already the star she wanted to be and with time it moved her into the direction she wanted for herself. Another example would be you want a house or a car, but it’s not just any car or house it’s a luxury! Your subconscious doesn’t know the difference so you would have to consciously make yourself act as if you have it because the external reality responds to the vibration of your internal self (conscious and unconscious) first, external after.

Neptune/Mercury the power is in the voice! One of the few placements that can will what they want for themselves with the power of the tongue. The truth of the matter is that you must pretend and then focus on the energy that is being presented when willing it into your reality. These are the type of people who can be prophets in their life and utilize this ability with any talents in writing/singing/rapping/visuals etc. The use of the hands here is a gift as well. Scripting and creating stories of their own life before it happens is something they could be pretty good at if they listen to their intuition. The mind responds to what you believe is real , like for example you say "Im ugly" a hundred times, the universe will attach that feeling to your reality. If you say "im pretty" eventually your mind will believe this as true, so then you end up being in situations that show your true nature. YOU control the mind and what comes out of it. Just be you!

Neptune/Venus the power is in your sensuality and the way you express your love for yourself and all around you. Beautiful placement, how you will what you want within reality is by going with the flow. Dreams can come true but with venusian energy we have to relinquish our control! These two planets together deal with the heart, so what we believe wholeheartedly can come true we just have to embrace it with our minds and the way we feel life with our sensual nature. Beautiful placement, i'll say it again.

The love you have for yourself will reflect back in your manifestations. Deservingness is a theme for people with this placement.

Neptune/Mars - Your drive. Your endurance levels and what you believe is possible is how strongly this placement will be. If youre not confident in whatever it is you want than mars energy here will be a pretty low since its dependant on the subconscious. I see people with this placement having to embark on a lot of psychological transformations as mars/aries rules the head so the mind will always be something worth having to overcome. Building up confidence and working up a sweat is actually a good way to help your manifestations come through quicker! Neptune/mars can rely on getting into the root of something to heal the wounds of the subconscious so that their conscious reality can mirror the internal feelings of what they desire in the process.

Neptune/Pluto - Okay so at this point i want to start of by saying that any planet that isn't a luminary (Uranus/Neptune/Jupiter/Saturn/Pluto) does not have much of a affect in the physical, but mostly internal and spiritual. Neptune and pluto together are a powerhouse baby! Because its dealing with the unconscious and the subconscious and its usually something that lays hidden. With the luminaries, we can consciously see what are reality is like versus our imagination. With this placement its tricky because if pluto wants to stay a secret, thats what itll be. The goal here is to see and feel what your imagination is trying to say to you. You may be dealing with blocked manifestation abilities with this placement so it'll take some sort of 'shadow work' to get the bottom of any issues as to why manifesting something isnt as easy.

Now here is the part on how it can be easier. Since pluto rules the unconscious, you must be aware of your dream state especially since neptune is the ruler of dreams. Sometimes what you want may not come thru you but through others, as pluto is a magnet of getting other people to do what it wants. So with that being said, connecting to your inner self via meditation and thru dreams would help you see the best manifestation method for you. Neptune/Pluto together shows me that their are a lot unlocked gifts that you may have to work to get a chance to use them. Pay attention to how you feel and what you say when manifesting. Start with a sentence on what you desire, pay attention to your imagination, what comes up? does it feel good or bad? if it feels good feel the vibration of it and thats when you'll know how to receive it because its thru a certain emotion (and emotions bring power WHEN used correctly). If it feels bad, why? go deeper on the subject, because it could either be blocking you or protecting you. A lot of times the unconscious like to hide because maybe when you were younger something 'forced' it to lock away certain gifts. Your subconscious/unconscious self holds great awards, and the more you go inside to see the more you will become the magician of your own reality!

Neptune/Saturn - Grounded. Material. Discipline. Staying Focused. 4 things to note with this placement is that saturn will reward you with the effort you take to move into it! The original law of attraction placement. It focuses on bring our dreams into material reality. With you guys, meditating on what you want and then creating a blueprint for it is the best way to see thru an idea and allowing the universe to present it to you the way it sees fit. We may not know all the answers but thats the point, we're not suppose to know everything we're just suppose to do it.

Now with you guys focusing on the task and putting all your energy on that goal is how saturn will push you forward to that thing you want to manifest. I need yall to dream big here because saturn whats you to create something with a long lasting foundation so theirs no playing small here. We start off with some baby steps and we move on to the bigger picture but saturns energy deals with the dark stuff nobody ever talks about. Hardwork pays off but the amount of effort you put into changing your mindset and going in with the challenge is the kicker.

Creating the vision is easy with neptune but putting in the work is sometimes the hardest. How bad do you want it? That's a saturn proverb here. We gotta get use to things not being as 'easy' as we may like, and thats the lesson saturn brings with this placement.

Neptune/Jupiter - This placement counts on your belief system so the higher your beliefs the stronger the outcome of the manifestation. This placement has no room for small, shorthanded beliefs because you'll eventually will have to learn how to expand your horizons. Jupiter rules luck, so a risk will be necessary on receiving what you desire. Do you wish to travel? Then you must believe that you can fly. New look? You must believe that you will look great in whatever you put on? Don't trust yourself to swim ? Gotta change that narrative, just say you're a mermaid without gills ;) jk. This placement can not be still and you will go through many journeys in life whether it's through the mind or across the world. Believe in MORE and you will receive it.

Seriously though, this placement is built on your belief system and it can get stronger immediately once you go towards more optimism in your life.

Neptune/Uranus. Think think think! The power is strictly in your consciousness. With manifesting what you want, it may be more unconventional than you'd think. As a person with this placement (this is a generational placement from like 1993 to 1999) I've noticed that this placement requires you to look beyond what you see in front of you. This generation so far is creating a new era of dreams no one never seen coming. Ive seen people manifest their dreams as being a rapper and even if their not super famous or in hollywood they've built a lifestyle for themselves that we've otherwise never seen possible. I'd say their more on the independant side which I've seen a lot of so far. But the reason I used that as an example is because you have to let go and let the unexpected happen. Our dreams are possible to achieve we just have to know that it may be different and most likely ahead of its time!

I hope you all loved my observation list on neptune and the other placements! Stay tuned for more to come. Maybe you can manifest what i do next ;) hehe, bye!

[gothic-thoughts]

Come To Fruition

(I do not like this nigga; #day1sukunahater 🙄)

Ryomen Sukuna x Black GN Reader Angst

JujitsuSorceror!Reader, TrueForm!Sukuna, Drabble

TW: Kidnapping, threatening, just Sukuna tings

CW: Your cursed technique implies you'll fall in love with the King of Curses

“What?” He scoffed, “I brought you into my domain nicely and you can’t even kneel?”

With an annoyed sigh, you slowly sink to your knees glaring into his red eyes as his evil smile grows wider and wider, taking pleasure in your animosity.

“So...you think you can fight me?”

“No. I didn't come to fight, I just said that so you’d bring me here so we can talk.”

“So you tricked me?”

You wince in guilt, looking at the floor, hoping the king of curses wouldn't kill you on the spot. With a deep chuckle, he rests his two lower hands on the mountain of skulls, pushing himself to his feet. He crossed all of his arms, red eyes narrowing down at you.

“Heh, no one has ever tricked me before—much less into a conversation. You intrigue me, human; therefore, you get to speak freely.”

“Freely?”

“Well....as free as I’d like. Now tell me, how stupid could you possibly be to want to be here?”

“Like I said, I just came to talk. I saw that you’re destined to be with me, like....romantically.”

He laughs loudly, shaking his domain as he walks around your body to stand before them, looking down at them as if your very existence was unfortunate.

“You truly believe you're...what? My fated one or something?” He laughs again, “Tch, how can something so foolish exist? What even lead you to such a theory?”

“I’ll show you, but it involves my curse technique.”

“Hm...” He cups his chin with his massive, upper right hand in thought, “Very well, but no more tricks out of you, understand? Or I’ll gut you so fast you’ll still be conscious enough to see what your liver looks like.”

Despite your trembling, you manage to open a small blue puddle atop the shallow pool of blood on his domain floor. You look up at Sukuna, making sure he is watching before saying "Where will I be when I find love?". The puddle shines brightly before fading to a dimly lit image of Sukuna’s domain. The monster’s eyebrows lift, leaning down to get a closer look at the vision before standing up straight with a scoff.

“Heh, and I reiterate, you think that the King of Curses would fall in love? And with a little...thing like you?”

“And you think I’d love you? My technique does not lie and it's never wrong.”

“So much for ‘never’. How does it feel knowing your curse technique is useless for your next battle?"

You hang your head slightly, trying not to argue, "It's not useless."

"Really, now? So you're saying there's a possibility that I will fall for something as foolish as mortal?”

“I hope not.”

“Exactly, so we're on the same page. Tch, I’d outlive you if I breathed on you wrong; it would be just a waste of time. My time, to be clear, not yours.”

“I know. But like I said, my technique is never wrong, and it only gets stronger the more I use it."

His smile suddenly disappeared as a result of a sudden change of attitude. "Interesting..."

"Yes, or it was supposed to. Can you...send me back out now?”

Your eyes widen but before you can speak he uses his lower left hand to grab your throat and guides you up to your feet. He pulls you closer, making you stumble as he drags, watching your eyes twitch and search his face for any mercy.

“Though I do admit that you’re intriguing, why would you think I’d do that?”

“...what...?” Your voice cracks, "But--" 

He held up a finger to his lips. “Shhh. You think that I would just let you go just because those pretty lips beg me to?”

He roughly releases your neck, making you drop to your knees, coughing. You rub the sore windpipe as he kneels. He suddenly grabs your chin, nails sinking into your cheeks and jaw, drawing blood from the puncture marks. Your eyes burn, preparing to release tears.

“Why?”

“And you still have the nerve to ask me questions!” He laughs loudly in your face, “You really are an interesting one, especially your technique. That being said, I want to experiment on you."

“Wait...my technique didn't mean you fell in love with me..." Your eyes widen in realization, "It meant I fell in love and you made me stay here...”

“Aw, isn’t that unfortunate?”

You sniffle, tears falling from your eyes to his fingers, “I shouldn't have come....”

He feigns a pout and wipes your tears with his other hand.

“Oh, don't cry, it's cute when you cry.” His pouting face cracks another arrogant smirk, “Keep that up and who knows, I might fall for you.”

[meowzfordayz]

helplessly-in-love

Author’s Note: thanks for embarking on this lil helpless-friends-to-lovers journey w/ me. 🤗

helplessly-in-love

Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader

Word Count: ~900

CW: none

they’re-both-so-helpless, emphasis-on-helpless

~faqs~

“Hey…”

“... hi!”

You can’t help but chuckle, an awkward smile that reminds Kyojuro of Home brightening your eyes. He sticks out his hand, a solemn expression on his face when you shake it, voice as serious as ever as he declares:

“Just so you are aware, you have officially agreed to be my romantic partner.”

“Kyojuro!” you exclaim, jaw dropping, cheeks hot, “I didn’t- You didn’t- We can’t-”

“-but we can! And we are!” he interrupts cheerfully, gaze twinkling mischievously, “Or is that not why you agreed to meet me?”

“I dunno,” you stammer, blinking quickly, hand burning as you realize you’re still clutching his fingers, snatching it away with an apologetic grimace, “I thought maybe this was the part where you tell me Haha so funny or Sorry, I was drunk when I snapped you or I changed my mind?! or-”

“Sweetheart,” Kyojuro murmurs, a husky, adoring title that halts you in your tracks, already missing the familiarity of his hand in yours, “I would never offer my sentiments flippantly.”

Your pulse stutters, head tilting with confusion. He watches you carefully, resisting the tender urge to cup your hands in his palms and press them to his chest. You swallow thickly, clearing your throat once. Twice. The corner of Kyojuro’s mouth twitches. You scowl, playful distraction scattering the haze in your vision as you huff.

“Oh nice Kyojuro,” arms crossing teasingly, “How kind of you to giggle at me after short circuiting my brain.”

“I am capable of such a feat?” he asks, smug grin informing you that his question is very hypothetical, “Do you remember your first impression of me?”

You nod slowly, gears struggling to shift at his unexpected tangent.

“I remember mine of you. Whenever I get to see you, I feel like I am simultaneously discovering something wonderfully new while also feeling a gentle sense of solace. You are the crackling embers I return to at the end of a weary, darkened day. And I love you.’

“Kyojuro… is the cafe really exhausting you that much?” you blurt, both concerned and stepsiding his explicit confession, “I can come and buy all of your baked goods or something. Whatever helps. So you don’t have to work as hard and worry about not selling enough stuff.”

Kyojuro laughs. A hearty, enraptured sound of devotion and exasperation. You narrowly avoid gasping when he swiftly grabs and covers your hands with his own, tugging them sweaty and nervous to his sternum. His eyes peer steadily into yours, your favorite color of sunset framed by unfairly long lashes, gleaming more fervently than you thought possible. You feel his breath as he raises your knuckles to his lips, kissing them lightly, smoothing the slightest tremor in your grip.

“They said I should tell you,” you admit, a rushed revelation as you melt in the fruition of your fantasy-becoming-reality.

“Oh?” his brow quirks, delighted in your acceptance of his touch, “Tell me what?”

“Mitsuri and Shinobu,” you squeak, “They said I should tell you that Iloveyou.”

“Tengen gave me a similar earful,” Kyojuro hums knowingly, “Although,” volume lowering as he rasps, “I did not catch your last word.”

You gulp, the extent of his affection and your flustered demeanor finally registering. Rengoku Kyojuro loves me you inhale deeply, allowing yourself to perceive the roughness of his callouses against the backs of your hands, jolting from your daze into the present tension as you notice the subtle doubt lingering in his pupils. And I…

“I love you.”

Your reciprocation is soft. Feathery. Grounded in the delicate caress of your fingertips stroking over his heart, matching the relieved exhale of fear from his shoulders.

“You love me!” Kyojuro beams, “I love you!”

With a happy squeal, you give into gravity, arms hugging tightly around him as he promptly lifts and spins you. We’re helpless you think, months of waiting and wanting obvious in how eagerly he holds you; in how resolutely he embraces you. Helplessly in love he thinks, the racing of your heartbeat almost audible; the shine in your eyes illuminating his heart on your sleeve.

“Your friend stopped by yesterday,” Kyojuro remarks. “[y/n]?” Mitsuri perks up, contriving glint in her stare. Uh oh Kyojuro freezes, recognizing his error too little too late. “Do you like them?” Mitsuri chirps—demands—excited now. “Pardon?” Kyojuro’s attempt at innocence is abysmal at best. “They aren’t my number one friend on Snapchat anymore… I think you might like each other!!!!!” “Huh…?” Even as his ears redden, turning swiftly to the espresso machine, feigning oblivion to the careful manner with which Mitsuri watches him. — Winter settles in, as does the yearning, Mitsuri’s prying at the forefront of his mind every time the bell on his cafe’s door jingles, your welcomed presence filling his lungs as he greets you. Again. And again.

5:02PM Kyojuro: I love you.

5:08PM [y/n]: ???

5:08PM Kyojuro: I apologize.

5:09PM [y/n]: DON’T DO THAT 🤯😖😭

5:11PM Kyojuro: Do not love you, or do not apologize for loving you?

5:11PM [y/n]: bgriludhgou;sbjgs

5:11PM [y/n]: KYOJURO 🥴

5:12PM [y/n]: meet me 2mro? we can go for a walk

5:13PM [y/n]: hullooooo??

5:25PM Kyojuro: Alright. ❤️

5:26PM [y/n]: it’s a date 😉

[molinaesque]

Cooper Howard and Lucy MacLean's rare and wonderful dynamic (and how it's ultimately alright if they don't become "endgame" or whatever)

First off... I'm saying this as a HUGE ghoulcy shipper btw. I don't wanna hear about some bullshit about how "you just don't like the ship" or something dumb like that (have you SEEN the state of my blog??). I ADORE this ship. These are also ultimately my own thoughts. Do not be affronted if this somehow doesn't apply to your hcs. At the end of the day, this is fiction, nothing more.

Something I have to note on about the wonderful dynamic between Cooper and Lucy. Even if ghoulcy stays platonic, I'm fine with it because this is the closest dynamic to Jack/Liz from 30 Rock that l've seen, and if anyone's seen that show, you KNOW what I'm talking about. Let me explain.

Jack/Liz were two v complex characters that had so much chemistry but the way their "relationship" worked was so unique in that they were never romantic but they're WAY more than just colleagues/ friends, etc. There was literally an article titled like "why you'll never see this kind of relationship in television again" and ghoulcy has the potential to be that again which is still GREAT! It even goes on to talk about how they're COMPLETE AND POLAR OPPOSITES but the dynamic still works and how they feed off of each other in the only way no other characters can. The "dynamic" is THEIRS and theirs only. Seem familiar?

From what we're getting not just in the Fallout show but from interviews with the actors and creatives involved, we're already getting that special dynamic. However, I must stress that many of the comments and those interviews (imo) are sometimes taken TOO literally. The existing text and subtext of the ship is already abundant and ripe so I feel like not EVERYTHING has to be referred to the ship and the ship only. I know it's mostly funsies but I legit wonder if some of this is taken too seriously to the point of misconstruing an actor's words and getting tunnel vision JUST for the sake of the ship and ship only, in turn cheapening what is already there. Kinda like what I've seen with people having to vilify Barb further with unnecessary inferences to scenes that give her more layers (like questioning her genuine love for Janey and Cooper. She can be loving AND a villain y'all. Both things don't have to be mutually exclusive) EVEN THOUGH SHE IS CLEARLY VILIFIED BY THE SHOW BY THE REVEAL SO WHY MAKE UP STUFF? To "punish" her more?? Apologies but this kinda reads as "I need to prop up my ship further so I MUST degrade the other ship" even though it's again... SUPER UNNECESSARY (I must stress I've seen this on ALL sides of shipping/character stanning. Both sides suck when you engage in this behaviour). Have fun and faith in the strength of your ships (ESPECIALLY if they're not "canon" adjacent)!

Anyway, as I was saying...

Going back to 30 Rock, there's literally a scene in the show where they get married due to shenanigans, they get in a big fight the whole episode and in the end sit down and have the most revealing discussion with a councilor about why they're so much more complex than typical relationship. And another scene where they sleep in the same bed together and addressed why they never hooked up with each other and why that's okay. By the way, I was also a HUGE shipper of these two... But I was fine with how they ended up with because the story of their special relationship that makes them uniquely THEM was clear and concise. This did not stop me from reading fics where they make kissy faces. It is possible to do both and I think some ppl tend to forget this.

I'm not saying this for the antis (don't like what you don't like, but if you harass shippers then you can suck eggs and leave. This applies to shippers to non shippers too btw. Be. Nice.), I'm saying all this because I want shippers to not "despair" if the ship that they've become so invested in doesn't come to fruition (and not go overboard into thinking that writers should listen to whatever audiences want all the time, we've been down this road SO many times, it's terrible. Do we REALLY need to talk about how The Rise of Skywalker turned out the way it did due to unnecessary pressure from the loudest antis/asshats in fandom? I think not). Maybe this is also more towards the younger audience members as a cautionary tale because we old ass millenials have seen and been through this but didn't have the immediacy of social media at our finger tips, so it was kinda easier to not be as reactionary. I don't like playing the "you youngins don't know what it was like" card, but at some points it is just a statement of reality. Some of you are/were LITERALLY too young to have experienced this.

Ultimately, what I'm saying is even if ghoulcy doesn't become "romantic", I'm fine with it as long as they stay within the "something more/beyond definition" dynamic which is ALWAYS refreshing to see. Give us more "what are we"! Give us more "it's complicated"! Give us more "we can't be summarized in neat little boxes"!

As long as they don't end up in the pit of "one dimensional interpretation of the Found Family trope which is somehow only just Familial and in this instance Father-Daughter". Please, I BEG. Nothing wrong for people to like this dynamic, but to immediately categorize this into that box is just... Tiresome. You can make the same arguments about "shipping two living beings together on screen all the time" too for sure... But again it leads to my point of if we're going the platonic route how about we NOT just shove it in the same boring dynamic of Father-Daughter that if you want, can find in multitudes of other forms of existing fictional media.

Tldr; have fun but always remember this is all fictional media in the end where we play with dolls in a sandbox. Just remember to BE. NORMAL. and not forget this and start shitting in it and flinging poo at each other. That goes with relationships with creators of said media too. Do NOT become parasocial and expect everything to be catered to you. The creators want to tell a story THEY came up with in the first place.

LET THEM.

[weirdworldofwinnie]

A Darling Distraction

Cillian Murphy as J. Robert Oppenheimer x Female Wife Reader NSFW 18+ only Oneshot

(Mood board by Selene Shelby @forgottenpeakywriter, this fic is especially for you, so I hope you enjoy! Thanks for the initial idea and support💕)

Summary: Robert's been married to you for a while and now in Los Alamos, after the last few years of hard work and a 'successful' Trinity Test, he desperately needs something he won't admit: his wife in pink satin lingerie and sexual stress relief.

Word Count: ~3,703

Warnings: Smut, unprotected and oral sex both ways, light daddy kink + breeding kink, some angst, mention of infidelity, period stereotypical gender roles, unspecified age gap (less than 10 years)

Disclaimer: Obviously NOT historically accurate to real life and is inspired by Cillian Murphy's portrayal of Oppenheimer in the film. It isn't supposed to be in total support and a complete reflection of the man's character, only my interpretation. Scroll away and DNI if you are uncomfortable or take issue with this; it is primarily for entertainment purposes only and it is just fantasy/fiction!

This is strictly a one shot story, no more will be added to it. If you want to read other Cillian!Oppenheimer fanfiction, check out my Masterlist

Tags: @happysparklingshadows (@forgottenpeakywriter wanted me to tag you), @frozenhuntress67, @immyowndefender, @szde8-blog, @bypurple, @irenethewoman, @noirrose21-blog, @gridmouse86

It had been less than 24 hours since the denotation of the gadget and Dr. Robert Oppenheimer's eyes had been engulfed in fire; the aftermath of a hot white flash as bright as a hundred suns blowing out his pupils, followed by a colorful mushrooming cloud that was somehow simultaneously beautiful and horrific. Between the hours before and after Trinity, he had thought of Jean and her influential poetry, and you of course, but now the bomb had become him and only that one vision filled his mind, haunting him.

All day he had been at the lab and offices, but mostly at the main mess hall celebrations that flowed with chatter and too many drinks shared amongst the military and scientists alike whom many believed had been witness to a great success, a miracle, but also the worst of humanity had just been born into creation. Oppenheimer had become what he supposed he had been destined to be all along: Prometheus, doomed to bring great power and advancement to humanity at a steep cost. He was the destroyer of worlds, but not technically yet, and that was the worst of it. The early morning test was exactly that; a trial, a preview of what was to manifest, and very soon would the world get to see such power he had helped birth. He desired peace, but the trick was he was only attaining that through warfare like never before. The stress was far from over and he was afraid to become a nervous wreck by the end of the decade with all these dark pervasive thoughts and doubts. Depression was nigh on the back of pressuring anxiety and there was no way anything would ever be the same again. He had changed, the world had changed, seamlessly overnight.

As he clumsily unlocked the front door to his home with slightly shaking fingers and stumbled inside, reaching up to remove his porkpie hat and hang it up on the coatrack, he called out your name hoarsely. After a beat of listening and there was no response, he sighed... Maybe you'd already gone to bed or were tucking in the children, whatever it was he didn't know and didn't care because he was too wrapped up in his own emotions. He felt ecstatic that all the hard work had come to fruition and they cemented history, but he was also at a paradoxical point of great accomplishment and great moral failure; the duality of man. But most importantly: it worked. Now what they would do with it was another matter he couldn't quit thinking about.

He reflexively twitched for a cigarette in his shirt pocket, but he was empty, so he walked to the bedroom single mindedly and fumbled for a box in the side table, yanking out the drawer and shifting through to pick up a pack of Chesterfield's.

"Darling?"

He jumped, spinning around with a huff and hand on his hip to see you standing in the shadows of the entryway and draped in a pink robe snug around your frame and he noticed your feet were bare as if you'd just been dressing.

"Y/N, I thought you were... Are the children in bed?"

"An hour ago, they were fussy and very insistent with missing Daddy, but once I read to them they finally settled down. You've been absent all day because of the test, what made you actually come home?"

He shook his head, finding relief and refuge in taking a long drag on the cigarette and blowing the smoke out, gesturing at you with the butt of it.

"You brought in the sheets like I told you to?"

"Of course, I knew."

"Good."

He moved to the edge of the bed and sat down heavily, rubbing his forehead and you noticed the tiredness he exuded for a man who usually was so attentive with higher energy levels, and how sunken in and sad his wide ocean eyes were. These past few years had taken a tremendous toll on his wellbeing more than ever... His jutting cheekbones and general gauntness were more pronounced with the unhealthy loss of weight and crinkles of wrinkles were all he truly kept gaining in eventual amounts; crow's feet, forehead lines, nasolabial folds, and etches under his eyes. His dark hair, kept meticulously cut short, was greying at the sides. Even his teeth, if inspected closely, were on a fast track to faintly showing signs of aging decay from all the smoking and drinking he did on a daily basis.

Robert was not the picture, nor rarely the temperament, of boyish youth you remembered from Berkeley.

Truthfully, you and him hadn't had proper sex in many months; it just wasn't very desirable or convenient between his never ending work that created distance between him and anyone who wasn't a scientist, the continuing socializing and parties with many other faces in town, and you personally spending days cleaning up and minding after little (often crying) children who did not have a clue of what their parents were doing out in the middle of the New Mexico desert surrounded by barbed wire fencing and uniformed men always patrolling. Life here was anything but boring, but the bedroom sure had become so. More often than not, Robert couldn't sleep soundly while you kept to your designated side of the bed and tried to ignore his tossing and turnings until eventually he doped himself up on sleeping pills to cope. He also hadn't been the same since the news of Jean Tatlock's passing and you highly suspected - no, knew - he had an affair during his trip to California once he had his security clearance approved. Of course it upset you he could be so idiotic and unfaithful, yet it wasn't shocking given his womanizing track record, but what made you more concerned was knowing how psychologically troubled Jean had been and if Robert thought he could offer her some consolation, he may have just made it worse and partly done her in. If he blamed himself for her death, you couldn't imagine carrying around that kind of guilt in addition to what he spent his time creating to end the war.

He stood now, restless, and began to pace an invisible groove into the flooring as he continually smoked and muttered to himself. You drifted away into the bathroom and shut the door, shrugging off your robe to the floor. You were completely nude underneath, coming off of a fresh bath and you had spritzed yourself with the best perfume you owned, hoping to surprise Robert, but something was clearly missing here.

Yes, and you know obviously what it is. It's his happiness, the spontaneousness that he has lost ever since he ran those calculations and went to Albert Einstein about a chain reaction igniting the atmosphere and blowing us all to bits. It was less than 0.1% chance, but it reminded him of the bigger issue... creating such a weapon with the power to destroy oneself was mighty weighty on any half decent man's conscience and even a rotten one's, for he too would be annihilated in the process if ever taken far enough. Everything these days was pure existential dread, no doubt about that, and no wonder Robert wasn't in the mood for love. His heart was being drained of it daily and you wanted to help, to fill him again even if just for once. It was difficult to watch him continually self-destruct and negatively affect those around him.

So you plucked up the ready matching pink folded satin lingerie he'd gifted you for the fifth wedding anniversary off the countertop and slipped into it, banking on the fact that it made you look sexually irresistible... And oh, it certainly did dial the appeal up to ten. You sauntered out of the bathroom and back into the bedroom where Robert was now seated on the bed, nose deep in a book and paperwork, clearly engrossed and a permanent frown was driven into his skin between his sculpted eyebrows.

"I have something for you, love," you announced softly as you leaned in the doorway, letting your body be on full display in such a loose, risqué little number.

"Hmm?" he murmured distractedly, haphazardly fluttering pages.

"Are you even reading any of that?" you asked flatly and he accidentally dropped it to the floor, hands still quivering and he tried to get up, wavering on his feet as you watched him in a strange state of both nerves cracking and drunkenness. You ached to make him better and by golly, tonight you would even if you had to throw yourself at him.

"Robert, don't you want to look at me? I have a surprise on..."

"I should pick this up and go to bed with a pill," he said to only himself, bending over and scooping the paperwork and book into his arms before standing unsteadily and he turned his back, carelessly dumping the materials onto the side table. You quickly strode up behind him and slid an arm around his waist, fingers drumming on his metal belt buckle splashed with a tinge of turquoise design.

He froze as you wound a bare leg around one of his and he reached behind his back, brushing your scantily clad silky bottom, fingers gliding over the fabric and making you moisten.

"The lingerie, you're wearing it," he stated and you couldn't quite tell if he was delighted by this or not.

"So I am, I know it's been a while since you gifted me with it, so tonight I thought I'd finally return the favor after the amount of stress we've been under, especially you."

"You-you're proposing I need... oh no. No, I don't know if I'm, uh, ready-no, I don't know if I-I can, I mean do-handle it-" he stuttered out and you fought a laugh. Oppie the great improviser, the genius, the man always in control of the proverbial cockpit was ironically clearly not thinking all that straight tonight and for once in his life, absolutely tongue-tied. You may not have much power as a housewife (that earned psychology degree had been so far deemed useless once you moved with him and had children) in this godforsaken place, but you had this way of melting your husband to molten lava that no one else was capable of. His mouth utterly agape, you ran your hands around the leather of the belt and snaked another leg around his, squeezing gently into his side as you put your lips close to his ear, murmuring.

"You know that we both need it, so just let me work my magic like a good old fashioned whore..."

He bristled, catching your hand still fondling his belt and pushing away lightly.

"I would never refer to you as that," he said, completely unamused and perhaps with a veil of disgust too that you thought seemed unnecessary.

"What am I, then, just the stoic scientific director's wife who will be at your side when you receive a Nobel for your work in stopping the world from global conflict with explosions and implosions?"

His sharp jaw clenched and in one swift motion, he abruptly fell over sideways onto the bed and you startled, leaning over and gripping at his shoulder, worried.

"Oh, Robert, are you sick? I was just being a bit sarcastic."

He closed his eyes, obviously in some sort of internal turmoil that didn't merit sharing fully.

"No, I just... We don't need to do this, not now, not when I'm having a pretty bad time. I'm fatigued, probably drunk, and I should talk to the General tomorrow about the schedule. I'll be wanting to fly to Washington soon; the President will be expecting a briefing and they need to determine the exact target and then once it's all over we'll need to settle somewhere else and..."

He began to murmur anxiously about all the engagements he was expecting (postwar and not) and you shook your head, pushing down on his chest.

"But don't you want a distraction, a temporary all consuming joy for one night?" you pressed and he finally looked up at you, really gazed at you, and a genuine buttery smile spread across his mouth.

"Come here, my love," he whispered while tugging at the lingerie panty bow unsuccessfully and you clamored onto the bed beside him. He paused, licking his lips, and then spoke too briskly.

"We'll get straight to it and once I finish, it should help me sleep naturally better than those prescriptions."

You sat up, shoving him playfully and scowling.

"That has to be the least sexist statement you've ever said to me in the bedroom. Don't you want a marathon, not a sprint? Enjoy me, Robert. That's what I'm really here for anyhow, your darling distraction."

He took this in, then rolled over on top of you, his hot alcohol and nicotine infused breath on your cheeks as he breathed heavily, and you made a cringing face.

"How many drinks have you had today? You smell of a bar and I'm thinking you should rinse your mouth out before you get the luxury of having me."

"You do, hm? I guess that's a command, Mrs. Oppenheimer," he smirked and sat up, shoving off to the bathroom and you went to go put on a record on the turntable in the living room. The classical music crackled through and you walked back to the bedroom, laying into a seductive position onto the bed, one leg propped up with a bent knee and your arm draped across the headboard.

When he came back, his eyes widened at the sight of you as though it was finally registering and he wet his lips again, unapologetically hungry. He moved to the bed, shrugging his suit jacket off to drop to the floor, taking off his black tie, and mindlessly undoing the buttons on his white shirt. That was quickly discarded as you waited for him to remove his socks and shoes, pretending to be impatient by switching position to cross your legs and checking your manicure.

"Hurry up, Oppie, I have a time limit here."

He shook his head disapprovingly, kicking the shoes under the bed and whipping off his belt, tossing it to the floor with a clunk before wrestling out of his trousers and you stared at his boxer clad skinny frame, the cock not even engaged yet... Looks like he's making you do all the work again. A petulant sigh escaped when you rolled your eyes and he pointed a finger, chastising.

"Patience, my love. Hasn't Daddy taught you anything at this point?"

You bit your lip as he leaned over and his bare chest collided with yours... You pulled him into an antsy kiss, mouths crushing each other needily and he tasted of tobacco and toothpaste, a strange combination, but better than before. You felt the slight sheen of cold water he had splashed on his skin transferring to yours and you gripped his neck, fingers splaying across the back of his head.

His own hands went to fondle your covered breasts and you pulled away from his kiss for a moment.

"You are divinely doll like in this, I love such feminine expression," he murmured in a kind of rapture.

"Shame it has to be stripped of me," you whispered with raised eyebrows.

"It's only garments, what really counts is here..." He suddenly squeezed both your breasts and you let out a spurt of high pitched noise, allowing him to remove the top, shimming it off your body in one motion and tossing it over his shoulder where the strap caught on the bedpost.

He thumbed over one nipple and then transferred to the other, teasing you to rock hard nubs. He moved to your panty, slipping it down and off to expose you, and you kicked it to the end of the bed. Then, in turn, you yanked down his underwear and his cock sprung out into your ready grip. You began to pump on it and getting him to a more erect state, rising up. He groaned lightly and you pulled the oozing tip to your mouth, parting lips and flicking your tongue out to carefully lick a strip along the length before taking head, making him grow stiffer and wetter by the minute. Your mouth popped of his length, swallowing, and he gripped your waist as he focused hard on you over his throbbing member.

"What do you want, my love? Do you want me?" he whispered huskily and you shivered in anticipated arousal.

"Yes, darling, I want you... I need you, you own me and I own you."

"Sounds like a fair arrangement," he breathed before crushing into you and began to rub, purely animalistic, all over your smooth body. His head burrowed down into your freshly shaved pussy just like how you and him liked it clean, licking at your folds and massaging your lower abdomen in a desperate frenzy. You dug nails into his hair, curling, and bucked your hips to meet his appetite when he slowly slithered on top. You groaned as you took him, all of him, and let his penis expand and stretch out your core to the fullest extent, clenching instinctively around the shaft as he thrust repeatedly until you were sent easily right over the edge in freefall.

"Mmm, Robert!" you squealed in ecstasy and he muffled you, hand slapping down over your mouth and shushing insistently.

"Shh, don't need to wake the children now. God knows they'll find Mommy and Daddy intimately together one of these days and be scarred for life at the sight." He chuckled as you whined behind his palm and grooved further at a pace you both knew very well. After years of marriage and sensual exploration, he knew all your sweet spots and sensitivities, when was too much, and yet it was taking all his self control not to completely plow you apart right now. His skin smacked against yours as he ground into you, hands everywhere at once and he peppered wet kisses all along your jaw to nape.

When his warm cum finally jetted into you, flooding in your cervix fully, you were unable to constrain a loud moan and he growled primally, his whole small frame shuddered through his own climax as you gripped his back, using his boney spine as placeholders for your fingers as he rocked further at a steady pace, not going to come out right away.

More orgasms came fast and one after the other, especially as you rolled over and he took his place beneath and you rode his cock in a fervor, letting the peak hit all over again and he watched in a dazed nirvana as you pleasured. When he finally pulled out from your used leaking hole, you could tell how satisfied he was having been able to hopefully successfully seed you and that signature smugness was so evident.

You laid panting at his side as he took up another smoke, struggling to keep his eyelids from closing and drifting off to sleep. You interweaved legs, soaking wet with combined fluids dripping onto the sheets, and he flit a free finger down to your soaked pussy, groping and nearly overstimulating you with another orgasm you didn't think could be as strong as the first. He grinned at the effect and cupped your mound with his palm, dominant of it as he spoke softly.

"Groves pointed out that I have no knowledge of birth control, which is true. By this rate, you'll be having yet another baby in nine months and I can only hope we are far from this current landscape and political climate then, never to return. You know, I'm hoping for another boy this time."

You sighed with a smile, rubbing your belly and his hand joined yours, rubbing circles over your navel.

"You make a wonderful mother," he commented in praise and you laughed lightly, bitterly, and glanced at him.

"I'm not perfect, I can barely hold it together these days when they're hungry, tired, and upset for no reason I can physically see at all... Sometimes I wish to wring their necks quite honestly. And you're very hardly the model father yourself when you are always away and hardly take care of them. I know the work is everything, but they need genuine paternal love more than your science to save them."

He shrugged, nonplussed, and then set his wispy cigarette to the ashtray before leaning his head against yours.

"We are probably horrible people, but I wouldn't have it any another way. To create life with you is more than I could selfishly do alone, for obvious reasons untold."

You laughed again at his dry humor and intertwined your body with his own, wishing you could crawl inside his skin and live in his bone structure. He was absolutely everything to you, even on bad days, and maybe his prestige and stability contributed to that, but there was real love underneath his flaws.

"Whatever you face, I'll be here to try to mitigate it," you whispered seriously and he nodded, appreciative.

"I trust you and I love you, Y/N. It won't get easier for me, for us, and I'm afraid the future may be as horrifying as I imagine it."

"That's why we have sex, to stave off the inevitable for a little while," you told him, tears pushing out and slipping down your cheeks. He caught one with his finger and wiped it clean off, staring at the translucent wet spot at the tip of his fingernail sadly. It wasn't unusual for you to weep after sex, but this felt different.

"Kiss me," he murmured and you leaned forward as he grabbed the back of your head and smooshed in, tongues writhing together for a few seconds before you both pulled away, breathing in the same air together.

"Tonight is good enough for me," he decided and you snuggled into his neck, closing your eyes to succumbing exhaustion.

In an uncertain frightening world full of variables, you vowed to be his one constant for life.

Thanks for reading 🖤

[whateverisbeautiful]

I was wondering what you think would have happened to Michonne and Richonne if Frank Darabont had stayed. We know he wasn't going to do Rick and Andrea because he said so. Do you think he would have done Richonne or would he have made Michonne follow her comic counterpart? I think I would have hated that because some of the things they have her do in the comics I am not a fan of.

Thanks for this question! I wrote my answer below. ⬇️😊

I love reading pilot scripts and, to date, Darabont’s pilot script for TWD is one of the best I’ve ever read. He’s an extremely gifted writer with the filmography to back it so it would have been interesting to see where he would have taken TWD if he stayed showrunner. But putting Richonne together, I just don’t know enough about his vision for the future of TWD to be able to predict if he would or not. I think Andy’s championing of Richonne would end up being the big motivator to make it happen maybe even moreso than Darabont wanting to go that direction himself.

Regarding Michonne’s comic arc - I’ve never read the graphic novels but I’ve heard details about Michonne’s arc in them and I am super glad they gave TV Michonne a much different experience than her comic counterpart.

I think Darabont would have strayed away from Michonne’s comic arc and given her something fresh as well. When Danai thanked Andy for having chemistry with her so she didn’t have to do some of the stuff comic Michonne did, I very much understood where she was coming from.

I know there were certain choices that Gimple made during his time as showrunner that I wasn't a fan of, but something I really do applaud him for is seeing the vision for Richonne’s romance, planting the seeds as a writer when he wrote one of my all-time favorite episodes of television ‘Clear,’ and then bringing Richonne to fruition once he was showrunner. Some showrunners would have been inclined to overlook the potential there, but I'm glad he saw it and acted on it.

It really does mean a lot that Andy, Danai, and Scott saw and championed Rick and Michonne being more than partners in crime, but partners in love. Rick wasn’t just meant to lean on Michonne as an asset but love on her as a woman. And Michonne wasn’t just meant to integrate into the group but into Rick’s heart and immediately family. I’m grateful they knew that and that they made the absolute most of Richonne and their love story. 🙌🏽

[munsonology]

Praise Him

A biker!eddie and nun!reader blurb

18+ only, MINORS DNI

CW: fem!reader, religious kink, blasphemy, degradation, humiliation, filth

Summary: an encounter between nun!reader and her biker lover…or is he?

My second contribution to @oneforthemunny’s summertime writing game and my first official post for Smuterday!

Enjoy whores!

Biker!eddie lifting nun!reader’s habit in the confessional.

“Say it!” Eddie groans into her neck. He licks a hot wet path from her throat to her ear, nipping her lobe.

“Forgive me God for I have sinned!”

Eddie’s fingers work magic between her thighs. She’s so wet he knows whatever man upstairs can hear the cream running down her legs.

“Does the power of Christ compel you?” Three of Eddie’s fingers wreak havoc on her gspot.

“No! Never,” she pleads. She opens her eyes, vision clouded in white hot pleasure to see her mysterious lover’s eyes.

Pure black.

“Who do you praise?!” Eddie’s voice is deep and gravely.

She bursts around his hand, “Satan!” She cries, gripping his wrist as if it could slow him down. His ears perk hearing her cum drip on the floor. He slides his hand out her sloppy cunt and grips her cheek. Her puffy lips pucker like a blow fish.

“Now clean it up.”

“But—”

Eddie puts a finger to her lips. “Shhh, we wouldn’t want Father to hear now would we.”

She lowers to her knees. Her tongue salivates seeing the puddle, her own desires come to fruition.

Her hot tongue licks the floor, tasting the cold cobbled stones and her own cream. Above her Eddie unbuckles his belt. He takes out his hard cock and jerks it.

She runs her tongue up from the floor, to his boot, to the damp black denim of his jeans until she finally reaches the head of cock.

“Every drop,” Eddie reminds her.

She nods eagerly and takes him into her mouth. He tickles the back of her throat. She breathes in the scent of him, running her finger nails through the thatch of hair at the base of his cock.

Eddie’s fingers tangle around in her hair. He pulls her head back. “Now, show your God who you really praise.”

[kyluxtrashpit]

Transferring this post from twitter, with some edits and additions, because the mess that was the development of the sequel trilogy fascinates me on an extremely deep level

Okay so. You’re probably aware that Adam Driver gave an interview a few weeks ago where he said that the original plan for Kylo in the sequel trilogy was to get progressively eviler throughout. Which I’m not here for redemption vs corruption arc discourse, that’s not what this post is (because I prefer a secret third option), and what I want to dig into here is what makes this an incredibly curious statement

Because this is the first time anyone involved with the ST has mentioned there ever being a plan. So, let’s explore that for a second because why is he saying something that’s completely at odds with every other piece of information we have?

(behind a cut for length, as I went and pulled a bunch of interview quotes and other materials and then analyzed them, you can scroll to the very bottom for my conclusions if you like)

So first, I went and found this, which I purchased many many years ago in 2017

In it, an interview with RJ himself confirms what the story has been for a long time: there was no plan, there was no required plot points, no endgame to lead to, just absolute freedom (I recall reading this then and feeling a spark of confusion and concern - what do you mean there was no plan?) 

I also found this, and while I don’t have the TLJ art book to verify it, another person on twitter confirmed it and also advised that RJ was even in the know regarding the Aftermath series (confirmed by him and Chuck Wendig at a convention) - so he knew a lot. And this plus the above shows that if there was a plan, it was abandoned before TFA was even released, likely even before it finished filming

And then we have the rather well known moment when JJ himself pretty much confirmed that the ST should have had a plan (question asked was about sw, even if JJ didn’t say it himself). Could this be shade at abandoning a plan instead of never having one? Maybe. But it’s unclear 

And as our last piece of evidence, we have confirmation from RJ that he asked JJ to change the ending of TFA. Which once again shows TFA was not finished when RJ, who explicitly said he was given no plan to follow, was writing TLJ

And that was the story all along, confirmed multiple times over. We can say for sure that as of the writing for TLJ being started, which was before TFA was even finished, let alone released, there was no plan. So it is certain that if there ever was a plan, that plan was abandoned at the very latest in early 2015, but I suspect 2014 is more likely

So why would AD say there ever was one? He has no reason to lie and I don’t think he is, he has nothing to gain and everything to lose by doing so. But with so many other pieces of evidence directly contradicting what he’s saying, I think we can also say that RJ is telling the truth too. But how can both be true?

Well, knowing the mess that is d/lf and also how disney treats actors I think it’s one of two possibilities:

Option 1: there was indeed a plan, likely pitched by JJ himself, and that d/lf agreed to that plan with no intention of ever following it through. They sold the actors on the plan, telling them it was a capital P Plan, but then didn’t ever tell them it had stopped being the plan, so that’s also why we saw the actors becoming increasingly frustrated throughout the series. They were told there was a plan, what the plan was, and then watched none of that come to fruition because it had secretly been abandoned long ago without their knowledge. It’s extremely scummy, but I could see disney doing it

Option 2: the plan was never a firm capital P Plan but rather was just the initial concept JJ had. No one ever committed to it, but since the actors couldn’t see the script, JJ’s initial vision was used as a “here’s my concept” kind of thing to sell the actors on without it being a firm plan. Just a concept that was used at the time but later discarded, as I’m sure a good number of concepts were. But it would be easy for that to get misinterpreted by the actors, and this gives us the less scummy option on the mouse’s part because it’s more about miscommunication than anything else

And if it is option 2, it’s also possible that the actors did know it wasn’t an confirmed plan, just a concept, but clung to those concepts since they were all they had. Which I can understand, given that not knowing the eventual story makes their jobs harder. I can totally see AD sticking with that initial concept even if he knew it wasn’t a “plan” per se, because he had literally nothing else to go on and he needed something to play the role. And once again, given how increasingly frustrated the cast got over the course of the trilogy, I suspect this experience would have been shared among the whole cast

Overall, I lean towards option 2 on this, because even though I do think disney is pretty fucking evil, option 1 might actually be a contract violation or at least open up the possibility of one. And plus, the entire story group would have had to be in on it, and if they did straight up knowingly lie to the entire cast and JJ, I just feel like that would be something which that many people can’t keep secret (plus wouldn’t RJ have accidentally spilled the beans when talking to JJ? Or was he in on it too? Too many players imo). I know it’s disney, but still, things leak all the time (as those of us who followed the tfa or tros leaks know lmao). Plus, I do agree with the adage of assuming stupidity over overt malice when in doubt, so I’m going to stick with that here

So ultimately, my suspicion is this was never a true, capital P, confirmed Plan, but rather the initial concept they used in place of a real plan (which they never made) because d/lf had nothing else to use to sell the actors on it and the actors had nothing else to cling to when actually playing the characters, so they used it where they needed gaps filled. And with it being more likely just a vague concept that was never committed to and was abandoned in 2014 than anything else, well, no matter how good or bad it might have been, I don’t even think it’s worth considering as something we ever would have gotten. It clearly wasn’t in the stars (ha) from very early on and thus belongs in the pile with the rest of the surely very numerous concepts that never came to fruition

And this, kids, is why trilogies need to be fucking planned lmfao

[scaredpigeons]

Reincarnation Theory; an attempted breakdown on Alhaitham and Kavehs relationship that will never come to fruition because Hoyoverse are cowards— by Pidge.

When I finally got my hands on Alhaitham, I was ecstatic. Not only because damn, I finally get to play as this hunky, genius know-it-all pretty boy who would surely never give me the time of day if we were in the same room, but because attaining his character in game gave me first class tickets to learning more about him.

Up until his release as a playable character, we didn’t really know much about Alhaitham. He seemed cocky and aloof, sure of himself and had the knowledge to back up those attributes. It was honestly a little frustrating to see a character who acted so much like one you’d want to hate, but you simply just…. Couldn’t. Because seriously…? He’s not wrong. Dig a little deeper, and a lot of players found his actions and personality type to be extremely autism coded, and honestly refreshing for a lot of neurodivergent players like myself, so used to never seeing “undesirable” personality traits in characters who are designed with the intention for you to love them.

Working on building up Alhaitham to be my main Dps was entertaining, and in doing so I ventured more into the desert, learning more and more about the mysterious King Deshret and his seemingly abandoned society.

The symbolism found within ruins and relics had me jumping to conclusions so quickly. Rushing to message my best friend and fellow genshin impact enthusiast, Kier, to tell them of my theory.

Alhaitham has to be a reincarnation of king deshret! There’s so much symbolic mirroring in his design, his constellation, everything! Even if he isn’t, he has to have something to do with this ancient society, I mean c’mon, look at him.

And Kier, ever the seemingly nihilistic critical thinker brushed me off.

I’ve not payed much attention to the desert lore so far, they’d said. It’s sort of boring and white washed, and I’m focusing on the archon quest line right now. But whatever you say, kiddo.

Of course being in the throes of a questline involving the dendro archon herself, and the questionable nature of the beloved scaramouche becoming a playable character, (I could write a whole essay on the problems of that story’s narrative alone, but I shall save that for another day) was enough to distract me from this thought process, but then he arrived.

Alhaitham’s story quest caused every cyno x haitham shipper to do a collective and dramatic record scratch, because who was this stunning blond bombshell and why is he so hot despite nagging at our boy?

Kaveh stole my heart immediately. One look at that little open back panel on his shirt and I was done for. And as the drip marketing started, and the leaks were sucked up the fans straws like a sugary drink on a hot summers day, I went digging.

Alhaitham has multiple voice lines dedicated to his flamboyant roommate, and several that mention him in passing. They have matching animations for when they are standing idle in game. Their signature dishes mimic foods from each others referenced cultures, even items within their Teapot gift sets are representative of each other in some way. For a game that so seemingly discourages relationships between adult playable characters (in favour of keeping an open ended relationship with the beloved traveller of course,) these two are seemingly more connected to each other than any two characters we’ve seen before.

So with my theory that Alhaitham is a reincarnation of King Deshret, that would make Kaveh the goddess of flowers, yeah?

That was my initial thought too, until I looked deeper and found the mirrors.

Mirror symbolism is extremely important to Alhaithams character. He is literally named after a prolific contributor to our understanding of vision, optics and light— Al-Hasan Ibn al-Haytham, born around a thousand years ago in present day Iraq. Alhaithams elemental skill and burst involve mirrors of dendro energy, which fly off and bounce off of each other when his burst is activated, much alike to how light bounces off a mirror.

Alhaithams character story lines mention that despite their seemingly tedious relationship, he really respects Kaveh and his intellect. Kaveh helps Alhaitham to look outside of his comfort zone, and Alhaitham helps keep Kaveh’s feet on the ground. He says they are excellent mirrors of one another, and takes their relationship as an opportunity to observe and learn things that he never might have without him.

Here’s where my blatant romanticism comes out to play. What if Kaveh is not the goddess of flowers, but the reincarnation of King Deshret himself? What if the two deities wanted to be reincarnated as perfect mirrors of one another, while still retaining qualities the other loved so dearly?

KD was very clearly an architect himself, the ruins and buildings of the desert are no small feat, which is what drew me to the idea that perhaps Kaveh is the king. Kaveh is an extremely skilled architect, literally known as the ‘light’ of his darshan. KD naturally would retain that love and devotion for aesthetics in design. But he loved the goddess of flowers, so why not reincarnate as someone she might love? Someone thoughtful and emotional, someone who cares, someone beautiful and full of life.

The goddess of flowers loved KD as well, for his undying will in his search for truth, for his strength, intelligence and ability to lead. Hell, she sacrificed herself just so he could get closer to his goal. But of course, she’d not be able to be rid of some of that care-free nature, that free will that lead her followers to love her so, hence her reincarnation into someone that Deshret would have loved, a person who dedicates their entire being to the truth, to the pursuit of knowledge, even if that means seeming self absorbed in the eyes of others (when in reality he’s only going to put effort into what is interesting to him, such is his own use of that free will.)

The GoF still roams the sands for her love, even though she’s not a fan of the sands that destroyed her in the first place, (Alhaithams ascension materials are found deep within desert caverns, “*tsk* there’s sand in my shoes”

And the mourning king still searches for his flowers that represent the love he lost so long ago. (KAVEHS ASCENSION MATS ARE MOURNING FLOWERS????)

Of course, this theory may change and grow as we learn more about Kaveh, as at the time i am writing this, he is still locked away in Hoyo’s basement. But rest assured, as soon as i get my hands on him i will take another deep dive into the lore behind these two morons, and we can further discover how connected they really are.

[bridgyrose]

“I…I did it, I finally did it,” Cinder said quietly to herself as she stood over Ruby’s body. Her blade slipped out of her fingers and disappeared as the fire in her eye faded. After months of training, months of learning to control her grimm arm and the maiden powers, all of it coming to fruition with Ruby dead at her feet. And yet, it didnt seem to satisfy the hunger she felt gnawing inside her. 

Her body stood almost frozen as she looked over body in front of her and her heart raced as she felt a shiver run down her spine. Ruby was supposed to be the one thing in her way of freedom, killing her was supposed to free her. Then why was the girl’s face stuck in her mind? Why couldnt she get that look of disappointment out of her out of her thoughts? Those last words of hers circling through her mind. 

“You’ll never be free.”

Cinder let out a growl of anger and kicked Ruby’s body. “Leave me alone!” Her breathing turned into heavy panting as she put her hand to her heart, finger tips digging into her skin. “I finally killed you, so why are you still in my head? I’m supposed to be free!” 

She gasped as she felt her grimm arm start to burn at her flesh as it started to creep up onto her shoulder. Her eyes widened as she started to look for a way out of the Beacon Tower, wincing as she used her semblance to try to slow the growth of her grimm arm. Even her legs shook as she took a few steps away from Ruby, almost on the verge of collapse 

And yet, Cinder still couldnt help but look back at Ruby. She still didnt feel satisfied that her rival was dead, like a piece of her was missing. And as the grimm arm started to take over, panic set in. She ripped at the arm, tearing pieces off as her shoulder started to bleed, only to be replaced with grimm flesh once more. No matter how much of it she tried to tear off, it didnt seem to matter as it kept growing back. 

Finally, she dropped to the ground next to Ruby, her breathing still labored as she reached out for her dead rival. “Get up… you… you always get up. We’re not finished yet, now get up!” She pulled Ruby close and cauterized the wound on her chest as the flames of her powers started to ignite in her eyes once more. Electricity coursed through her fingertips as she pressed down on Ruby’s chest to pick herself up, straining to keep herself conscious as the pain from the grimm arm moved from her shoulder to her back. 

Crack

The sounds of ribs cracking as she pushed down filled the air, her body winced at the sound. Her eyes stayed on Ruby as her own body dropped back down to the ground, waiting for any sign of movement. When she didnt see any, she tried to pick herself up again to press down on Ruby’s check again. 

Crack

The sound of another rib breaking sent a shiver down Cinder’s back as her vision started to fade from the pain of her grimm arm making her more grimm-like. She growled as she dropped to the ground again, her voice strained as she yelled. “Get up, dammit!” She tried to pick herself up once more, groaning as her body started to give out from the pain. 

Another rib broke and a bright, silver light left Ruby’s eyes as she gasped for air. All Cinder could do was drop to the ground as her arm gave out from under her, pain shooting through her body as she felt her grimm arm burn. Then, just as quickly as the pain flooded through her, it was gone. 

Cinder rolled to her back and shakily lifted her arm as she let out a fireball above her, eyes closing as it exploded against what remained of the ceiling of Ozpin’s office. A smirk crossed her lips just before she lost consciousness, her voice trailing off as she tried to speak. “Your friends… will… find us..” 

Her body felt weightless as her arm fell back to the ground, almost serene as she lost all sense of what was around her, waiting for someone to find them.

[starlightshadowsworld]

The Fallen King Part 2: The Room Where It Happens.

Link to full fic

(Trigger warnings for suicide, Beast Atsushi's self esteem, survivors guilt and greif.)

"What?!" Yelled Ace, eyes wide in shock. Karma stumbled back in shock from where he was standing. Everyone else simply stared at Atsushi, trying to process the news.

'So far so good.' Thought Atsushi as he looked out to the nearby window. He'd thought of what the coverstory would be.

But telling it didn't make it any less painful.

"During the raid, the Boss ordered me away from the fight. He said a helicopter was sent for him, to get him taken to safety. It was protocol so I didn't question it."

Not that Atsushi would ever question the Boss. The man's mind was far more great, that someone as lowly as Atsushi could never comprehend it.

"We got to the rooftop and while we waited, the Boss told me about a dream he had."

While the location and the timing were inaccurate, the conversation the two shared was in fact real.

"We got to the rooftop and while we waited, the Boss told me about a dream he had." While the location and the timing were inaccurate, the conversation the two shared was in fact real. 

Dazai and Atsushi had dismounted from one of the Boss's personal cars. Dazai had been overseeing a new front operation for the Port Mafia.

When he'd asked Atsushi to join him in his office.

This wasn't unusual but Atsushi had assumed he would be dismissed after the mission. As if he'd read his mind, Dazai had chuckled. "I won't keep you long."

Dazai poured himself a glass of whiskey, he didn't offer Atsushi one he never did. He sat and looked out of the giant windows, down to the city below.

"Do you remember the night I found you, Atsushi?"

Atsushi, standing at his side nodded, even though Dazai wasn't looking at him.

"I could never forget something like that. I'd sooner forget my own name." Dazai chuckled "I'd sincerely hope not, I went to all the trouble of picking one for you."

Atsushi had feared he'd said something wrong. Because of course how he could forget that. Dazai didn't comment on it, nor did he seem displeased.

But it was always hard to tell what he was thinking, what mood he was in.

"The night I found you was indeed special night. I recieved a new weapon in my arsenal. But I also recieved quite the dream." Dazai took a swing of his drink and Atsushi waited, patiently.

"I saw Yokohama, she was almost glowing in the sun. The very shadows on the streets seemed warmer. You were there, laughing beside Kyouka.

And it wasn't just you all, even Chuuya looked happy, though he was grumbling of course. It was like seeing light in an otherwise pitch black sky. This, I believe was a vision of the future."

Dazai turned to face Atsushi who almost reflexively lowered his gaze. "But while I saw you in the light, I couldn't see myself. Why do you think that?" Asked Dazai.

At the time Atsushi had simply said that it sounded like a lovely dream. And that maybe Dazai hadn't seen himself, because it was from his perspective.

"Hah, clever as always aren't you Atsushi." There was mirth in his voice, and yet something else. Something Atsushi couldn't quite place, not than.

But now, years later as he stood and recited this conversation to the executives Atsushi finally knew.

'The Boss didn't see himself... Because it was a future without him in it.'

That's why he had ordered Atsushi to leave, because he wanted his dream go come to fruition. 'And yet I stayed behind in the darkness.' Thought Atsushi, it hurt more than any physical pain to betray the Boss like this.

And yet he stayed.

"It was than he looked at me, and said there was no helicopter. That this was the last dream he would ever have. He smiled at me... And than he jumped."

The silence that followed that declaration was heavy. It was damn near suffocating. Atsushi could feel his heart rating as he waited for the inevitable.

It wasn't often Atsushi was right.Dazai would be the first to tell you that. His dear subordinate was quite the trained killer. But he unfortunately lacked the brains to be much else.

A strategist Atsushi was not.

'Though I sure saw this coming' he thought, feeling an invisible force pick him up. And slam his head into the wall behind him.

"And what, the fuck were you doing during that?!"Atsushi looked up. Straight into the piercing eyes of Chuuya Nakahara.

A punch hit him soildly in the jaw. Atsushi could feel the bones shatter, but he didn't let himself so much as wince.

Followed by another.

And another.

Timed to strike just as Atsushi's ability negated the wound. Atsushi would expect nothing less from the man who trained him.

"Answer me!" Screamed Chuuya, his fist hovering in the air. It sounded a threat, it probably was one. But Atsushi remained silent, even if he could come up with an excuse he didn't.

Because Atsushi deserved this, hell Chuuya was going easy on him.

"Chuuya!" Called Kouyou but Chuuya didn't take his eyes off Atsushi. Even as he lowered his fist, it shook ever so slightly.

"You know damn well you could've dove after him. Caught him in time, survived and got him to safety....Why the fuck did you let him fall?"

He sounded no different than usual but to those that knew him, he was pleading.

Chuuya Nakahara, the strongest man in the Port Mafia and damn well all of Yokohama... Was pleading.

For Atsushi to explain himself and Atsushi couldn't. He almost broke down than and there. This hurt, this hurt so much more than any blow or attack ever could.

Atsushi watched Dazai fall knowing he couldn't save him. And now he was watching Chuuya shatter before his eyes.

And there was nothing Atsushi could do. "I couldn't do it" said Atsushi, his voice broke slightly and he cursed himself for it.

'I have no right to grieve... Not when I caused this.'

Chuuya frowned, as if sensing there was something else to come. But at that moment Ace spoke up. "Well, be as it may. With the Boss gone you're his ideal replacement."

Despite this being Atsushi's enf goal, he was suprised. "Him?" Asked Kouyou, suprised as well as we're the others. Oh don't look at me like that. I doubt any of you would let me do it."

That, they all agreed with. "And unless you 3 are offering" Kouyou grimaced as did Verlaine and Chuuya didn't say a word.

He looked back at Atsushi with eyes full of hurt and betrayal.

"So that's what this was about..." Atsushi wanted to deny it 'but he's not wrong is he?' Atsushi hadn't killed Dazai to take his spot... But he might as well have.

Chuuya dropped Atsushi to the floor and glared down at him. "You knew he was planning stunt, did you? Let him lead you away so none of us would be any wiser?"

"Chuuya!" Called Verlaine, trying to diffuse the situation. He shot Atsushi a look, silently telling him go say something.

To say anything at all to defend himself but Atsushi remained silent.

"And how convient for you, what was this 4 and a half years in the making? I shouldn't be suprised, given you killed your last mentor too."

Atsushi felt like he'd been stabbed, pain exploded through his chest. But there was wound, there was no blood and yet he was in agony.

Tears blurred his vision and he blinked them away. He couldn't cry, he lost the luxury for that long ago.

"That's enough" Said Kouyou firmly. "We still need to vote on the subject. And in case you were all unaware, the building is quite literally falling apart." She had come to Atsushi's aid, but he really wished she hadn't.

Chuuya scoffed "I'll go deal with it, I want no part in this shit." He didn't give Atsushi another look and left the room. The door slammed behind him as Atsushi shakily got to his feet.

"I didn't know... I didn't, I froze..." He said, it sounded weak to his own ears but it was all he could say.

Not that it mattered, Dazai was dead and it was his fault.

Verlaine smiled, it was a warm and sad one like his always were. "I'll go after him but" he took off his hat, clutching it to his chest. And gave a respectful bow to Atsushi.

"You have my vote, Boss." He twirled his hat, putting it back on and left.

"You have mine too, Boss" Said Kouyou kindly, standing to give her own bow. "I wouldn't have said it otherwise, you have mine too Boss. And majority rules." Said Ace, bowing with Karma following in suit.

Atsushi knew he should feel elated that his plan worked. But he couldn't bring himself to feel much of anything. "Thank you, we can conclude this meeting later. Preferably when the building isn't falling apart."

At that they both chuckled before everyone became serious.

"I need both of you to gather your subordinates down to the lower floors. Kouyou you will take the east and Ace will take the west. In accordance with the Homecoming protocol."

In the event of Headquarters being attacked, the clean up crew and lower ranked subordinates would check that the building was structurally sound.

If it wasn't, like now Chuuya and Verlaine would keep the building steady. While they did that, the construction crew would use their abilities to reinforce the building.

Kouyou and Ace were to lead the evacuations. Meanwhile Atsushi and Kyouka would patrol the outer ring to ensure the attackers didn't get away.

'Which, is exactly what I did' mused Atsushi. It was also to ensure the Boss's protection. Which Atsushi had definitely failed. "Very well, but if suggest you and Kyouka join me." Said Kouyou, very much eager to go find Kyouka.

Atsushi shared the feeling, he knew she was okay alone. But he'd been terrified for her during that fight. And that feeling hadn't faded.

That fight that felt like years ago now. 

He didn't acknowledge the part this meant Kouyou wanted the responsibility of protecting him. As he was the Boss now.

"I'll be right behind you, I just need to call Verlaine. Head to your areas, make sure to keep everyone close. We can't afford to have any stragglers."

Both executives nodded, pausing to bow before leaving. Atsushi knew it was as odd for them, just as it was for him. 'Something to get used to.' He supposed, before noticing Karma was still there.

"Can I help you?"

Karma shook his head, shly pulling out a parcel from a bag. "For you, Kyouka mentioned tha-"

"Karma!" Yelled Ace, noticing his subordinate wasn't with him. Karma smiled, sheepish "coming!"

He looked back at Atsushi, knowing he really needed to go. So he let out a quick "happy birthday Atsushi...I mean Boss!" He apologised, bowing and ran to where his mentor was.

Atsushi stood there frozen in place.

Oh. 

Oh. 

It was today, wasn't it?

Atsushi thought of claws tearing into flesh. Of hugging the smiling frame of the Headmaster, as he died in his arms. Dazai had smiled at him too, as plummeted to the ground.

The irony that he killed them both on the day he was born.

Atsushi wanted to break it but he put the parcel in a bag. He left the room and joined Kouyou and Kyouka.

Kyouka frowned "I'm sorry I shouldn't have said." She knew how much he hated this day. But Atsushi would always hate himself more. It was his own doing after all.

He smiled and he hoped it looked reassuring. "Later, for now we need to get everyone to safety.'

Everyone would be made accounted for and the building made anew. But all Atsushi could think of was the one body they'd found on the ground.

Still smiling at him just like another man did.

'Happy birthday, Atsushi.'

[katey-writes]

So I completed a novel. It sits at 110k words and was a labor of love and felt so good to watch it come to fruition!

But then you find out how much the novel is just step one if you, like me, decide you want to give it a go and see if you can get yourself published.

I will say this off the bat, you can do all the research you want (and you should!) but that probably won't be enough to get you ready for the gauntlet that you are going to walk. First, I should say that I have an amazing support network. This includes a therapist, a supportive spouse, and my mom who is my biggest fan. To top it off, I've been in the same fandom since the onset of the pandemic, and have made some extremely close and supportive friends through that. Combine that with having a decent day job and it's a pretty good place to be to try.

I found some amazing resources (namely https://www.reddit.com/PubTips - it's so good. I highly recommend!) that explain where to go and what the process is. In the US, if you have a novel you want to publish traditionally, you can go to Query Tracker and look up literary agents that represent your genre who are also currently open to unsolicited queries. Then you write yourself a query (ie a short but enticing pitch, usually less than 350 words, about your book) to get an agent interested. They'll often also ask for a synopsis (breakdown of the whole plot), sometimes a pitch (a single sentence), the first many pages/chapters of the book, and finally what books that are comparable to yours.

Then you send these out to some number of agents, likely a large number of agents, because they're all getting inundated with over a hundred of these queries a week, and you cross your fingers and hope... and wait.

And then you brace for the rejections. Most of the time they're form letters but there are times that they give feedback.

I think all I want to say about this is build up your resilience. It doesn't matter who you are, you are going to get a whole bunch of "no's." If the agents are kind enough to leave you with feedback, take it. In my case, it has not even been a month yet since I submitted to agents. I got a bit of feedback which has indicated that I have not hooked people into the world I wrote early enough, so I turned to those magnificent fanfic friends to ask them for advice on how I could make the hook dig in faster. (Sometimes those things are hard for authors to see - we live in our worlds and can sometimes be tunnel visioned.)

I have a few regrets. Not about querying this work, not at all! But I wish I had asked people completely unconnected to the story if they could read the first chapter or two and tell me if they felt connected to the world. I wish I had sent my query to be critiqued by reddit (I'm telling you, /r/PubTips is incredible). I wish I had broken my queries into smaller batches, so if a few agents got back with the same criticism, I could hone that first before sending to more.

This is also a process that requires patience, a thing I do not have enough of! I'm grateful that financially, not getting a rapid book deal (or traditional deal at all) is not going to impact me. I want my writing out there and I still think about how amazing it would be to get to write all day! But this whole process takes time. And it takes luck. I could have the perfect query and still strike out, and I could have a mediocre query but an agent who connects with the story. It's subjective and it's a craps shoot.

So I guess that other than writing about my experience, I also wanted to give a few nuggets I'm picking up as I go.

Get critical beta readers especially for the first few chapters!

Use the non-agent resources available, like /r/PubTips for your query!

Send your query out to a LOT of agents, you never know who is going to connect with it. But, it's best to do it in smaller batches in case you get feedback that you can use to improve!

Be patient! It takes time. Find friends who will give it love if you need some whilst waiting (ps THANK YOU to my wonderful friends for giving it love whilst I am waiting!)

And you're going to get a lot of no's. That's okay! It's even okay to be salty and to grumble about it. But don't give up.

Rejection hurts, and it's okay for you to feel it! But you are resilient, you will bounce back, you will persist.

And if you want to beta read a story about a girl who meets a dragon and watches her whole world turn upside down, then please feel free to reach out!

[charmedreincarnation]

What do people mean when they say the 3D is fake. How can my physical experience be fake when it’s happening rn? I get the 4D imagination stuff but I also believe the 3D does the same thing ?? Or am I confused. Sorry if this is an odd question I’m trying to get answers for a few things so I can start applying properly and I would rlly appreciate your perspective Maya

I never really bought or internalized the “3D isn’t real or it’s fake” argument. It’s very much real, and if it wasn’t why would the 4D matter? The 3D will always reflect the 4D with persistence. It's like a mirror: if you can see yourself in the reflection, then you can manifest it into your life. Not only can we use that teaching to manifest reality, but also to gain insight into particular events and situations - by approaching them from a different angle. For example, if there is a situation that needs to be resolved, take a few minutes to close your eyes and imagine the resolution or outcome for that situation as if it were already a reflection in 3D reality. Then, if you focus on this vision regularly, you may find that the situation shifts and resolves itself as if by magic.

This is why all manifestations can come to fruition, and also why other branches of manifestations such as revision work. we can begin to understand that what we create in our imagination and focus our thoughts on will eventually become a reflection in 3D reality - an exact duplicate of what we had imagined. This is what Neville termed as “The Law of Reflection.”

What reflection provides us is an understanding of how our desires are always present within us. Like the 4D cube that can only be seen when we shift our perspective, our desires are always here no matter what perspective we take or where we look for them. So next time you feel lost or can’t seem to locate your desire in the physical world, don’t forget that it is still within you, and that’s where it always starts.