#do you really just want to avoid responsibility for your actions
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mx-bluesky · 6 months ago
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“what on earth is this tweet thread did they actually get mad at their editor for working with a jew and then do the equivalent of turning in homework late and complaining about the teacher when it’s not graded with everyone else’s” I am HOWLING this is a beautiful analogy. I just need to compliment you on it lol
why thank you! the compliment is deeply appreciated. I do wish they hadn’t been lying about it though. I get it if they struggle with deadlines (i sure do) but that's why you build systems to help you yknow? and when those systems fail you should be transparent about it. just my personal opinion
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rxttenfish · 6 months ago
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while aaravi remains firmly within "yeah miranda has a difficult personality and isn't very easy to get along with + has many rough edges which are slowly being worked on but still going to be an issue" after having been very much so within the camp that miranda is a Vexing Bitch upon first contact/getting to know her, she DOES go from "miranda is unpredictable and dangerous as a merfolk and large macropredator and her emotions are inscrutable and random" to "merfolk aren't very hard to understand or predict and it's very easy to stay on the safe side if you keep basic rules in mind and don't freak out the second something unexpected happens"
#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#miravi.txt#just. thinking about it!#thinking about specifically how merfolk (like most other animals) growl/hiss specifically as a deterrent#like if you start really upsetting miri and she wants space and you to Please Stop#she will probably turn her face away from the other person or turn her body away from them#while growling or hissing and pulling her fins back#and will open her mouth to bare her teeth or gape her mouth open to show her teeth (including heavily panting)#where the point is ''i will hurt you if you touch me/get closer/dont stop so please dont do that''#but a lot of people read it as her being either obtuse (if she turns away from them)#or outright aggressive for the showing of teeth and growling#when shes really not. shes being very polite in merfolk terms in giving multiple chances to avoid violence#shes going ''i am worried i might have to hurt you so please reconsider'' in a way thats very readable if youre another merfolk#who will then step away or give her her space and switch the tone of the conversation#to see whats wrong#whereas her being more deliberately aggressive/violent usually comes with minimal vocal cues at all#or (if shes specifically threatening someone such as in the case of getting aggressive over perceived threats to her social bonds)#she will often turn towards them and open her mouth and flare her fins#often deliberately closing the distance and making herself appear Extra Large#she WILL growl here but will never hiss (hissing being a more defensive sound)#and will often smack her tail against the ground or show her claws or otherwise demonstrate how large and how scary she is#as a deliberate point of ''you crossed a line and this is what is going to happen to you if you dont make it up right now''#which! both require VERY different responses but might look similar to a human!#and might end up coming off as unpredictable or random in her actions and cruelty!#when shes not! shes just doing things the way a merfolk does them#which means aaravi realizes VERY quickly after learning about all of this#just how many cues miranda gives that people are starting to make her uncomfortable and feel Not Okay#that are ignored or written off because theyre merfolk cues#merfolk are very tolerant of stress but have basically no concept of escalation of violence for that reason#because if youve ignored every chance to prevent something dangerous up until the point it goes too far
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platinum-horizons · 8 months ago
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4
edit: 4 was NOT supposed to be there i dont know how it happened
Like I know we all love making ADHD seem cool but like, don't forget it's actually a disability? My ADHD is bad enough I've nearly been evicted for forgetting to mail the rent check to the property manager, I've forgotten to pay the utility bills and had my water or power get turned off or had to pay fines bcs I missed a credit card payment. Once I was supposed to cat sit for a friend and I lost the house key she gave me but didn't realize until she was already out of town, and she had to call the apartment office to get someone to give me the spare so her cats would have food for the week. When I'm unmedicated I can't even get myself to shower half the time, forget eating or cleaning. Before I started living with my fiance I'd just like, not eat for days because I didn't have anyone to remind me to eat or go buy me food. I've forgotten to turn the stove off so many times and ruined kettles and tbh been DAMN fucking lucky the house didn't burn down. I've done stupid, impulsive shit that's nearly gotten me KILLED. I can't remember to close the shower curtain reliably even through my fiance points out every single time I forget, and he's almost out of soap rn bcs for the last MONTH neither of us have been able to remember to order more once we get out of the shower.
I've had such bad memory my entire life that to this day someone suggesting I forgot something because I simply didn't care enough is a legitimate trigger that, in the worst cases, makes me have a breakdown.
I get that for some of you this is just something that makes studying hard or you forget to take a pee break when you're playing Minecraft or whatever, that's still a valid struggle and you do deserve help and understanding, but like, ADHD is a disability. It's disabling. It's not impossible to improve and learn coping skills, meds help a lot, there are great accommodations out there(LIKE CLEANING SERVICES), but not every case of ADHD is the same, and a lot of them are pretty ugly ngl, and just because you managed to do something doesn't mean someone else is gonna be able to manage it too, or that they're being lazy for struggling. And that obviously doesn't mean ADHD people have a free pass to never work on themselves and make everyone cater to their every need or whatever, but we do deserve some understanding when we explain that our disability is actually disabling in ways that aren't palatable to you. So like, idk, maybe don't immediately recoil in horror when you find out that someone with ADHD can't keep their house clean. And for fucks sake don't ridicule them for it.
#yeah. I have pretty severe adhd and along with impacting my focus and things#i have really bad memeory problems because of it. medication doesn't even help that. Like you could tell me something thats really fucking#important or spill out feelings to be and id probably forget it all in the span of a few hours to a day.#i forget to eat. I forget to brush my teeth. i forget to shower. i forget to drink water. i forget to clean things.#i also want to add that. I can have major meltdowns because of my adhd. And I bet other people have that happen too#I dont know about other people but#i would NOT want to be avoided or treated badly in general because of a meltdown. There's at least a few other people who can agree with th#I know im not the only one. So please#dont ridicule people with adhd for not keeping their house clean or forgetting something you said#and don't be a bitch because someone had a meltdown they couldn't control#this isnt me saying “ohhh when someone does ____ in a meltdown they still shouldnt have consequences”“! no.#i fully believes in taking responsibility for your actions#but you guys also need to remember that we arent in the right mind AT ALL during that. i know I can be extremely unpredictable and sometime#violent towards myself or others during the breakdowns#yes I am aware that is not ok.#i will take consequences for my actions#but if you're just going to tell me to stop doing shit for attention or to “stop crying its already happened”#stay the fuck away from me.#(btw i had a worker at a mental hospital do that to me. He also got angry at me and snatched my clothes away from me when i was trying to#get them in the dryer because i was acting confused and was taking too long#what was actually happening was that i was stuck trying to process all the instructions he gave in like less than a minute.#i then had a meltdown after he snatched the clothes away from me. I didnt get violent but i was screaming. not at anyone#just screaming because of how distressed i felt in the moment over that. I felt like i wasnt understood#it felt like nobody even gives me a chance before i get stopped for “being too slow”.#because yes#i can take a while to process things sometimes.#but that doesnt give anyone the right to be an asshole to me in(at least I'd thnk so)#so along with not ridiculing someone for not having their help clean#not brushing their teeth or not drinking enough water#dont be an asshole because someone with adhd had a meltdown and also be patient with them.
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derinwrites · 7 months ago
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The Three Commandments
The thing about writing is this: you gotta start in medias res, to hook your readers with action immediately. But readers aren’t invested in people they know nothing about, so start with a framing scene that instead describes the characters and the stakes. But those scenes are boring, so cut straight to the action, after opening with a clever quip, but open in the style of the story, and try not to be too clever in the opener, it looks tacky. One shouldn’t use too many dialogue tags, it’s distracting; but you can use ‘said’ a lot, because ‘said’ is invisible, but don’t use ‘said’ too much because it’s boring and uninformative – make sure to vary your dialogue tags to be as descriptive as possible, except don’t do that because it’s distracting, and instead rely mostly on ‘said’ and only use others when you need them. But don’t use ‘said’ too often; you should avoid dialogue tags as much as you possibly can and indicate speakers through describing their reactions. But don’t do that, it’s distracting.
Having a viewpoint character describe themselves is amateurish, so avoid that. But also be sure to describe your viewpoint character so that the reader can picture them. And include a lot of introspection, so we can see their mindset, but don’t include too much introspection, because it’s boring and takes away from the action and really bogs down the story, but also remember to include plenty of introspection so your character doesn’t feel like a robot. And adverbs are great action descriptors; you should have a lot of them, but don’t use a lot of adverbs; they’re amateurish and bog down the story. And
The reason new writers are bombarded with so much outright contradictory writing advice is that these tips are conditional. It depends on your style, your genre, your audience, your level of skill, and what problems in your writing you’re trying to fix. Which is why, when I’m writing, I tend to focus on what I call my Three Commandments of Writing. These are the overall rules; before accepting any writing advice, I check whether it reinforces one of these rules or not. If not, I ditch it.
1: Thou Shalt Have Something To Say
What’s your book about?
I don’t mean, describe to me the plot. I mean, why should anybody read this? What’s its thesis? What’s its reason for existence, from the reader’s perspective? People write stories for all kinds of reasons, but things like ‘I just wanted to get it out of my head’ are meaningless from a reader perspective. The greatest piece of writing advice I ever received was you putting words on a page does not obligate anybody to read them. So why are the words there? What point are you trying to make?
The purpose of your story can vary wildly. Usually, you’ll be exploring some kind of thesis, especially if you write genre fiction. Curse Words, for example, is an exploration of self-perpetuating power structures and how aiming for short-term stability and safety can cause long-term problems, as well as the responsibilities of an agitator when seeking to do the necessary work of dismantling those power structures. Most of the things in Curse Words eventually fold back into exploring this question. Alternately, you might just have a really cool idea for a society or alien species or something and want to show it off (note: it can be VERY VERY HARD to carry a story on a ‘cool original concept’ by itself. You think your sky society where they fly above the clouds and have no rainfall and have to harvest water from the clouds below is a cool enough idea to carry a story: You’re almost certainly wrong. These cool concept stories work best when they are either very short, or working in conjunction with exploring a theme). You might be writing a mystery series where each story is a standalone mystery and the point is to present a puzzle and solve a fun mystery each book. Maybe you’re just here to make the reader laugh, and will throw in anything you can find that’ll act as framing for better jokes. In some genres, readers know exactly what they want and have gotten it a hundred times before and want that story again but with different character names – maybe you’re writing one of those. (These stories are popular in romance, pulp fantasy, some action genres, and rather a lot of types of fanfiction).
Whatever the main point of your story is, you should know it by the time you finish the first draft, because you simply cannot write the second draft if you don’t know what the point of the story is. (If you write web serials and are publishing the first draft, you’ll need to figure it out a lot faster.)
Once you know what the point of your story is, you can assess all writing decisions through this lens – does this help or hurt the point of my story?
2: Thou Shalt Respect Thy Reader’s Investment
Readers invest a lot in a story. Sometimes it’s money, if they bought your book, but even if your story is free, they invest time, attention, and emotional investment. The vast majority of your job is making that investment worth it. There are two factors to this – lowering the investment, and increasing the payoff. If you can lower your audience’s suspension of disbelief through consistent characterisation, realistic (for your genre – this may deviate from real realism) worldbuilding, and appropriately foreshadowing and forewarning any unexpected rules of your world. You can lower the amount of effort or attention your audience need to put into getting into your story by writing in a clear manner, using an entertaining tone, and relying on cultural touchpoints they understand already instead of pushing them in the deep end into a completely unfamiliar situation. The lower their initial investment, the easier it is to make the payoff worth it.
Two important notes here: one, not all audiences view investment in the same way. Your average reader views time as a major investment, but readers of long fiction (epic fantasies, web serials, et cetera) often view length as part of the payoff. Brandon Sanderson fans don’t grab his latest book and think “Uuuugh, why does it have to be so looong!” Similarly, some people like being thrown in the deep end and having to put a lot of work into figuring out what the fuck is going on with no onboarding. This is one of science fiction’s main tactics for forcibly immersing you in a future world. So the valuation of what counts as too much investment varies drastically between readers.
Two, it’s not always the best idea to minimise the necessary investment at all costs. Generally, engagement with art asks something of us, and that’s part of the appeal. Minimum-effort books do have their appeal and their place, in the same way that idle games or repetitive sitcoms have their appeal and their place, but the memorable stories, the ones that have staying power and provide real value, are the ones that ask something of the reader. If they’re not investing anything, they have no incentive to engage, and you’re just filling in time. This commandment does not exist to tell you to try to ask nothing of your audience – you should be asking something of your audience. It exists to tell you to respect that investment. Know what you’re asking of your audience, and make sure that the ask is less than the payoff.
The other way to respect the investment is of course to focus on a great payoff. Make those characters socially fascinating, make that sacrifice emotionally rending, make the answer to that mystery intellectually fulfilling. If you can make the investment worth it, they’ll enjoy your story. And if you consistently make their investment worth it, you build trust, and they’ll be willing to invest more next time, which means you can ask more of them and give them an even better payoff. Audience trust is a very precious currency and this is how you build it – be worth their time.
But how do you know what your audience does and doesn’t consider an onerous investment? And how do you know what kinds of payoff they’ll find rewarding? Easy – they self-sort. Part of your job is telling your audience what to expect from you as soon as you can, so that if it’s not for them, they’ll leave, and if it is, they’ll invest and appreciate the return. (“Oh but I want as many people reading my story as possible!” No, you don’t. If you want that, you can write paint-by-numbers common denominator mass appeal fic. What you want is the audience who will enjoy your story; everyone else is a waste of time, and is in fact, detrimental to your success, because if they don’t like your story then they’re likely to be bad marketing. You want these people to bounce off and leave before you disappoint them. Don’t try to trick them into staying around.) Your audience should know, very early on, what kind of an experience they’re in for, what the tone will be, the genre and character(s) they’re going to follow, that sort of thing. The first couple of chapters of Time to Orbit: Unknown, for example, are a micro-example of the sorts of mysteries that Aspen will be dealing with for most of the book, as well as a sample of their character voice, the way they approach problems, and enough of their background, world and behaviour for the reader to decide if this sort of story is for them. We also start the story with some mildly graphic medical stuff, enough physics for the reader to determine the ‘hardness’ of the scifi, and about the level of physical risk that Aspen will be putting themselves at for most of the book. This is all important information for a reader to have.
If you are mindful of the investment your readers are making, mindful of the value of the payoff, and honest with them about both from the start so that they can decide whether the story is for them, you can respect their investment and make sure they have a good time.
3: Thou Shalt Not Make Thy World Less Interesting
This one’s really about payoff, but it’s important enough to be its own commandment. It relates primarily to twists, reveals, worldbuilding, and killing off storylines or characters. One mistake that I see new writers make all the time is that they tank the engagement of their story by introducing a cool fun twist that seems so awesome in the moment and then… is a major letdown, because the implications make the world less interesting.
“It was all a dream�� twists often fall into this trap. Contrary to popular opinion, I think these twists can be done extremely well. I’ve seen them done extremely well. The vast majority of the time, they’re very bad. They’re bad because they take an interesting world and make it boring. The same is true of poorly thought out, shocking character deaths – when you kill a character, you kill their potential, and if they’re a character worth killing in a high impact way then this is always a huge sacrifice on your part. Is it worth it? Will it make the story more interesting? Similarly, if your bad guy is going to get up and gloat ‘Aha, your quest was all planned by me, I was working in the shadows to get you to acquire the Mystery Object since I could not! You have fallen into my trap! Now give me the Mystery Object!’, is this a more interesting story than if the protagonist’s journey had actually been their own unmanipulated adventure? It makes your bad guy look clever and can be a cool twist, but does it mean that all those times your protagonist escaped the bad guy’s men by the skin of his teeth, he was being allowed to escape? Are they retroactively less interesting now?
Whether these twists work or not will depend on how you’ve constructed the rest of your story. Do they make your world more or less interesting?
If you have the audience’s trust, it’s permissible to make your world temporarily less interesting. You can kill off the cool guy with the awesome plan, or make it so that the Chosen One wasn’t actually the Chosen One, or even have the main character wake up and find out it was all a dream, and let the reader marinate in disappointment for a little while before you pick it up again and turn things around so that actually, that twist does lead to a more interesting story! But you have to pick it up again. Don’t leave them with the version that’s less interesting than the story you tanked for the twist. The general slop of interest must trend upward, and your sacrifices need to all lead into the more interesting world. Otherwise, your readers will be disappointed, and their experience will be tainted.
Whenever I’m looking at a new piece of writing advice, I view it through these three rules. Is this plot still delivering on the book’s purpose, or have I gone off the rails somewhere and just stared writing random stuff? Does making this character ‘more relateable’ help or hinder that goal? Does this argument with the protagonists’ mother tell the reader anything or lead to any useful payoff; is it respectful of their time? Will starting in medias res give the audience an accurate view of the story and help them decide whether to invest? Does this big twist that challenges all the assumptions we’ve made so far imply a world that is more or less interesting than the world previously implied?
Hopefully these can help you, too.
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eamour · 5 months ago
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avoid any action.
with manifesting, there comes an intrusive urge to act. a deep need to do something to get something. we often try to change our world or ourselves through actions. however, we don’t alter or attain things with the use of our bodies. we can only ever achieve things with the use of our MINDS.
! this post was partially inspired by @sparklingself and her post called "do nothing" !
law of assumption.
let’s take a look at what the law of assumption states.
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law of assumption
/lɔː/ /ɒv,əv/ /əˈsʌm(p)ʃn/
"the law of assumption postulates that the assumptions of an individual shape and create one's physical reality."
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so, what does that mean? how does this help us?
mentally, not physically.
just like assumptions take place in the mind, so does everything related to manifestation. after all, manifestation is forever done in the mind, and not with the body. all events that have taken place physically, first took place mentally. everything external used to be internal. conversely, you can only put out what you already put in.
in conclusion, you cannot DO anything. there is nothing for you to perform, nothing for you to execute, nothing for you to accomplish. you can only BE. so, in order to become someone new, to coerce something into BEING, you need to refrain from taking any action. let go of all efforts to alter the physical. instead, alter the mental.
mental and physical in contrast.
okay, alright, but what if you still try to physically achieve your goals? how about we try to prove the law wrong. let's say you want to get xyz while being in a negative mindset in relation to xyz. you don’t really believe in getting xyz, nor do you believe in yourself. but if you try your best physically, it should still workout, right?
nope. and i'll tell you why. you can never alter yourself with an act in opposition to your belief. your desired version of self cannot be attained by force. you cannot force yourself to achieve something while already knowing you won't or can't. if it isn’t already withIN you, it won’t and can't be withOUT you.
on the other hand, that version of yourself with your current mindset in that present state is NEVER going to achieve xyz. because that version of you is tied to that self concept, that state and that reality. creation is finished, meaning, this reality is finished. it’s forever going to look like that. you are forever going to be like that. ONLY if you change your state from within, you can ensure a change from without. that’s when you shift your state of mind, and therefore, your physical reality. you cannot physically shift. you need to mentally shift. because no matter HOW much you try to make reality B (undesired) look like reality A (desired), it won’t ever change the fact that you are still experiencing reality B.
externally dependent action.
now, what about the 3D? what if i am changing my assumptions but don’t experience them physically yet? this part is very important for any of you who are thinking of completely turning your back on your 3D, who feel overwhelmed by it or don’t know how to deal with it.
1 · first of all, you are doing great. keep doing it.
2 · second of all, living in the end and focusing on embodying your desired version of self does not mean that you start refusing to LIVE. you aren’t supposed to deny or reject your human experience when it’s not convenient for you. you are still going to do your chores, have your responsibilities, attend school, go to work, and so on. in your mind, however, you are being who YOU want to be and have what YOU want to have. it’s about knowing the external world is going to change because it has to, plus balancing experiencing both worlds. in the end, your outer world will show you how your inner world looks like.
often times, suddenly abandoning yourself in the physical world will only harm you because then it will only be harder for you to dismiss the negative parts of your reality. it usually makes things a lot more draining and challenging.
physical techniques and methods.
this is just gonna serve as a reminder: techniques and methods are only there to help. they aide you to obtain a feeling of "naturalness" in correlation to your desires. they don’t do the manifesting. actually, they have no power on their own. you know who does the manifesting? YOU. you and only you. thus, you can do a method 111 times and still not manifest your desire because your assumptions say otherwise. everything you manifest with the support of a method or technique can be traced back to you, moreover your MIND's power. not your bodies power, and certainly not your hands ability to write down a script 123 times.
"there is no need to do something. don’t do anything. because if you WERE who you wanted to be, all you would do is experience BEING it. you wouldn’t DO anything." — edward art
don’t change it. let it be changed.
with love, ella.
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aplpaca · 2 years ago
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thinking about how I've seen OCD get talked about now, but haven't really seen many posts that actually explain what it is. And like, obviously people shouldn't get all their info about mental conditions from posts, but u can't deny that internet communities and stuff play a major role in people recognizing and putting names to their own experiences.
But like since the general public has like absolutely no idea of what OCD actually is (no thanks to popular media), and a lot of things I see talking about intrusive thoughts don't mention OCD (either bc they originated in OCD circles or bc intrusive thoughts aren't Exclusive to OCD or for some other reason), there should prob be more explanation put out on what OCD actually consists of.
Which is kinda hard in some ways, bc there are so many ways OCD can present in terms of what "themes" a person experiences, so someone talking about what their themes are might not ring a bell with someone who experiences different ones. But like, the core thing with OCD isn't the presence of certain themes, it's a specific pattern of spiraling thoughts and reactions.
Like. OCD is a mental condition/illness where people experience stressful, unwanted, repetitive thoughts. These are intrusive thoughts are what make up the "obsessions" part of the disorder. In response to these intrusive thoughts, a lot of people will perform certain actions or think certain things in an attempt to neutralize or disprove the threat they represent. These are the "compulsions" part of the condition.
For a more "traditional" example, someone experiencing intrusive thoughts that they might catch a communicable disease may obsessively wash their hands or google their symptoms to try to lessen the anxiety. While someone who is worried they might hurt someone (even though they very much do not want to hurt someone) may avoid being near sharp objects or may avoid the people they're afraid of hurting.
One of the issues with OCD is that performing the compulsions provides short term relief, but in the long term it only strengthens the stress caused by the intrusive thoughts, thus furthering the thought spiral and actively making it worse, to the point where, depending on your themes, you may be (almost) convinced that your intrusive thoughts represent the truth or the inevitable or something permanent.
Intrusive thought themes cam be literally anything, but some of the common ones are stuff like
Questioning your sexuality, gender, etc (what if I'm actually straight/gay/bi/trans/cis/etc?)
Being worried about losing control and hurting yourself or others physically, sexually, emotionally, basically any way (what if I want to kill someone? What if I'm a pedophile? What if I'm an abuser? What if I want to stab myself? Etc)
Fear of becoming or being sick
Worrying something bad will happen to you or people you care about
Worrying about your spiritual beliefs or lack thereof (what if I'm actually Christian? What if I'm actually atheist? What if i don't believe in the faith i ascribe to? Etc)
Worrying about relationship status (what if I don't actually love them? What if they're not "the one"? What if they're cheating? What if *I'm* cheating? Etc)
What if I'm a bad person?
Fear of losing things
Fear of things not feeling right (this is often be related to other themes via magical thinking. ex: if I don't have my things organized Just Right then something bad will happen)
Fear of unreality
Compulsions vary by theme a lot obviously, but some common ones include
Hand washing
Organizing things until they Feel Right
Checking and double checking and triple checking to make sure you did something correctly
Obsessively reviewing your memories to disprove a thoughtor make sure you don't believe something
Arguing against the thoughts in an attempt to disprove them
Testing your mental reactions to a thought or to certain kinds of content, to show yourself you don't actually believe or feel something
Obsessively googling symptoms, testimonies, things related to your thoughts
Obsessive prayer
Repeating phrases, mantras, affirmations, etc in an attempt to make thoughts go away
Avoiding things and situations that set off your intrusive thoughts
Repeatedly asking for reassurance from others ("I'm not being xyz, right?")
But yeah this obviously isn't exhaustive but, just, if this kind of thing sounds familiar, you should probably do some research on OCD, bc while intrusive thoughts can occur with other conditions, the intrusive thought-compulsion spiral is the core of OCD and isn't really a subaspect of depression/anxiety/ptsd/etc. and the treatment and management of OCD can look different from other stuff, so its a good thing to look into.
(Also it's important to keep in mind, esp if you're someone that doesn't have it, that someone's intrusive thoughts Are Not "secret desires" or "repressed urges" or anything the person even remotely wants to act on. Someone having harm-related intrusive thoughts is not at risk of actually acting on them, no matter how worried they are of doing so.)
Anyway this was a long post and I don't have a neat way to wrap it up and also I accidentally added a poll and now can't get rid of it so here's free poll. I'm running on nyquil and a small amount of straight gin (which works very well at numbing a sore throat) rn gnite
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pellucid-constellations · 4 months ago
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for a drabble literally just anything cutesy with azriel like banter or ANYTHING
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Word count: ~700
Warnings: None!
a/n: I've been in a cutesy mood so I love this <3 Enjoy Azriel being a messy simp. Also this is kind of Archeron!Reader but barely.
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“Wonderful, my love,” Azriel smiled.
“Do you really like it?” you asked, nerves evident in the twisting of your fingers. “Because I tried something new and was positive it would taste terrible.” 
“It’s delicious.” 
Azriel leaned forward in his chair, resting his steady hand on both of yours. You bit your lip as he gave you a gentle nod, confirming his words. When you still looked troubled, Azriel reached out and gathered you onto his lap. His fingers came up to brush your hair back. He avoided the flour and sugar and what he thought was an eggshell as he went. 
“It is, y/n,” Azriel stressed. “The best muffin I’ve ever had.” 
“Okay, sure,” you deadpanned, placing your arms around his shoulders. “But you said that about the cake I made for our mating ceremony and then I tried it myself and almost gagged.” 
“That was not your cake to try.” 
“Greedy.” 
Azriel huffed out a laugh, gazing up at you as you sat on his knee. “Why are you so concerned about this, hm? You have plenty of skills outside of baking.” 
“Azriel, I’m going to be alive for a long time,” you stressed, thinking back to the finite years you were destined to before you had been thrown into the cauldron along with your sisters. “I can’t be bad at baking. That’s ridiculous.” 
“There are plenty of fae that are terrible at baking.”
“Oh no,” you groaned, shoving your face into your hands. “So it was terrible.”
Azriel shot into action, a momentary panic making his hands freeze along your back. “No. No, that is not what I said, y/n. Not at all. I was just saying that—” 
“Oh, nice. Muffins.” 
Cassian’s nonchalant tone sent even more panic down the Shadowsinger’s spine. Azirel shot up from his seat, jolting you up as he went, and slapped the muffin from his brother’s hand, the pastry just seconds from his mouth. Azriel hadn’t even heard him enter the sitting room. 
Everything went silent as the muffin tumbled from Cassian’s hand and rolled and rolled until it collided with a wall. Azriel’s hand was still raised as Cassian blinked back at him. You stood frozen, baffled, and unsure of your next move. 
“Azriel—” you began, but Cassian cut you off. “The hell was that for?” he accused, arm jutting back to the muffin still rocking on the floor. “I can’t eat a muffin in my own house?” 
Azriel opened his mouth in reply but then closed it after a beat of silence. Cassian raised his brows and flung up both hands in a plea for a response. 
Finally, Azriel formulated the words, “She is my mate. You can’t eat the food she makes.” 
Cassian scoffed, a sentiment that was mirrored in the crossing of your arms. “I thought you’d be over all this by now.” Cassian gestured around his brother’s figure. “The possessiveness and being an asshole.” 
“Yeah? Yeah, well… Well, I’m not,” Azriel affirmed. And to taunt Cassian more, he reached for another muffin and took a mighty bite.
You rolled your eyes. “This is dumb. I made a mess of the kitchen and I do not want to be part of whatever this is.” 
Azriel held eye contact with Cassian as you fled the room, his gaze narrowed and his jaw unmoving. To his credit, all Cassian did was stare back with an almost amused expression. Until the door closed behind you and Azriel made a quick movement to the table, snatching up a napkin and removing every crumb of the muffin from his mouth. 
He coughed a few times and balled the napkin up, his eyes watering as he greedily grabbed the tea you had brought with the plate. It took a few heavy gulps and a confused sound from Cassian before Azriel could explain. 
“That was the worst muffin I have ever had. I couldn’t have you trying it and telling her that. Be grateful.” 
771 notes · View notes
buttercupblu · 3 months ago
Text
Satoru's Psyche|Escalating
"Should I really have to suffer for my actions?"
Previous SessionSession 2 of 10|Next Session
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🗂️Patient Chart Update: Patient Gojo displayed extremely flirtatious and unruly behavior during the first half of his visit. Mentions of escape and kid-napping were noted as well as enforced close proximity with his nurse. Threatening remarks were also made at the end of his lunch in response to mentions of disciplinary action. Patient is scheduled for a bath but is pending the possibility of negative punishment to instill corrective behaviors. 📋Length of Session (w.c): 8.1k out of "i said we will cross that bridge when we get to it 😊" 💊Intake Chart (tags): mild violence but no in-action descriptors, coercion, manipulation, drug use, angst, unwatched close contact and touch, nudity, mentally unstable Gojo, Nurse!Reader ✏️Doctor's angel’s note: i hope you know what you're doing, Nurse 🎼Waiting room music: Overheated|Billie Eilish
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Choose wisely.
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Hunger stirs in your tummy, and Gojo's words sit with you through lunch. Your spoon clinks around the bowl, stirring the soup growing colder by the second though the growls from your stomach are too obnoxious to be ignored. But your mind wanders.
You're stuck. Earlier, you were all for serving up justice on a silver platter, but now you're seriously second-guessing your "genius" idea to punish Gojo by making him someone else's problem.
As if anyone would be crazy enough to say yes.
Everyone already avoids his wing like the plague. It's kind of an unspoken fact that you are Gojo's one and only. The only staff he allows near him. Anyone else would be playing with fire.
And if someone was brave enough to willingly throw themselves into the lion's den, they definitely couldn't be new. New to nursing—new to the ward. High expertise was needed here. Someone seasoned—experience which you lacked yourself—otherwise, they wouldn't last a second with Gojo.
It'd be way too easy for him to make them snap, like tossing a bone to a dog.
"Persephone." Yuko brings you out of your coma.
You perk up, instinctively smiling. "Hey, what's up?"
"You tell me," she snorts. "You've been playing with your food like break isn't over in 10 minutes." She touches your arm. "Everything ok?"
It's written all over your face, huh? You could deflate right now.
This is why Yuko is your favorite co-worker. Always reading you like a book without you needing to say a word. Quick to call anything off out.
Leaning back in your chair, you huff, rubbing circles into your temples to relieve the headache you didn't know you had.
"Yeah, yeah," you begin, "It's just—" You stop, her eyes hold so much concern and you've barely opened your mouth. Not sure if you should now because you know what kind of person Yuko is.
And if she knew even half of what you don't tell her during your lunch breaks spent complaining about work, she'd hang Gojo out to dry if she could. She often makes it very clear she hates you have to deal with him at all.
"—I'm just a bit tired. Gojo's scheduled for a bath later, him and two others. Gojo's easy but...I don't know. I feel slower than usual today. Definitely won't get home until late, again, because of all these sponge baths." You cringe at the last part.
Aside from trying to keep Yuko cool, you also didn't want to risk the news getting back to the Director who could take you off of Gojo completely. No one else could take your place. And who knows what would happen if you disappeared from his roster for good?
How would his threats manifest?
Yuko scoffs, waving her hand.
"Gojo and easy do not go together," and you both shake your heads and laugh. "But I get it. You did come in super early."
"Thought there'd be less of us," you sigh.
"Sonya's been on our asses lately, right? But hey, she finally got us all here."
"A little too late. The damage is done," you pout, resting your elbows on the table, realizing you've accidentally grown used to chaos and ever-changing schedule.
You routinely plan ahead to make sure you can stand up when people fall short. Constantly putting yourself on the back burner seems to be a thing that always set you back.
"Sooo, you just need rest, ya? Nothing else? Gojo—" there it goes "—been 'okay' with you lately?"
Your heart skips. "Ya. he isn't so bad today," you lie, "I'd just love to be home on time for once. Maybe even a bit early, I'm soo close. Overtime's been wringing my neck for weeks."
Yuko looks at you with puppy dog eyes. And not in a "I feel sorry for you" kind of way, but one that almost makes you feel bad for not telling her the whole truth.
"Here," she pushes your soup towards you, "How about I do Gojo's bath and you get an early start on my last two? That way you can at least binge that show you won't shut up about later." She smiles.
You immediately protest.
There's no way you can do that to her.
Yuko never even crossed your mind and was far from your first pick, not because she couldn't handle him but because she was your friend. Not just a colleague, but someone you actually cared about more than anyone else in this run-down job even if she didn't feel the same.
She's too good of a person, and you'd be the Devil Incarnate if you let her do something so risky. Especially when you can just suck it up and get it over with.
"Woah, woah, it's just a bath, calm down," she says, taking your hands in hers as you ramble on trying to convince her that you'll be fine or that you'll find someone else.
Burdening her was completely out of the question.
"Who else but me, Seph'? You don't you think I'm as good as you?" And the way she says it, giving you that look she does when you're being stubborn, dares you to challenge her.
Now you really had to think about what to say.
Goddamn it, you regret saying anything at all, but Yuko's so motherly, how could you resist? Hiding from her is impossible, she would've sniffed you out sooner or later.
Easing your pains when she could was her specialty—helping to calm and settle you down when you're quick to blow things out of proportion.
Could this be one of those moments? Or were Gojo's words more than just hot air?
The back and forth was killing you, but the combination of Yuko's reassuring touch and your gurgling stomach put the final nail in the coffin as she reminded you of the time.
Eyes wide, you look at the clock, ticking away faster than you realized, then back at your lukewarm soup.
Denying that you needed help would be silly because technically it was true. You probably should've asked the Director for a little Gojo break long ago, even if just for a few hours a few times a week. It was better than nothing because if you couldn't function, Gojo couldn't be cared for.
And when you really think about it, who better to fill in for you than Yuko?
The gutsy woman has been your rock since you started at the ward, She's had your back, sticking with you through tough times at work when staff constantly dipped in and out of the facility like a rotating door after being unable to handle the job.
A real day one.
Next to you, she's the most competent nurse in these walls, fully equipped with a "take-no-shit" attitude that routinely keeps her patiently in check.
It'd be silly, downright irresponsible to trust anyone else.
Her offer is simply too good to dismiss.
"Thank you, Yuko," you cave, grabbing your spoon and finally allowing yourself to enjoy your meal. "You're...amazing. I don't deserve you."
She looks on happily. "Just promise me you'll take some personal time after this," she insists, worry evident in her voice. "We both know how much you care, but even superheroes need rest."
She's too kind and right in more ways than one.
"Besides, I think Gojo will like me, ya? I'm cool. I'm fun. He'll like a friend of friend, you think?"
Your eyes roll—ya, totally, cool people definitely say they're cool.
You don't know whether to joke back or wave her off, softly smiling at her concern instead before nodding. You vow to make good on your promise and feel a bit lighter knowing your wish for early release will actually come true.
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Maybe.
The latest threat to your miracle in the making is Mr. Hampton, who is personally making it his business to drag the already long day by its edges. Almost bringing time to a standstill with the way he's handling his bath.
Enormous and lumbering, the man Yuko usually deals with took his sweet time gathering his things and even longer trekking down the seemingly endless halls leading to the bathing area. Occupying every inch of the space like those massive trucks on the interstate, hogging the road, yet inching along at a pace that makes a snail look like it's in a sprint.
All that was missing were the yellow hazard lights.
Oh no, please, take your time, you think, watching Mr. Hampton clean each limb painstakingly s l o w in a tub that's comically too small for him. You may have been able to rush through Yuko's first patient, but this one wanted all that time back.
His pace resembles a giant's, and his cheerful nonsensical hums echo around the hollow chambers, lulling you to sleep, turning your eyes into bricks under the spell of the melody. Perfect timing for the energy drinks from early to crash you out, tag teaming with the chair beneath you that feels a bit too soft as you lean over the tub, willing the colossal man to hurry up.
Warm water flows over your skin as you scrub circles on his neck, deciding to bite the bullet and take over the bath so he can play with the foamy bubbles, when you hear a blood-curdling scream.
Your entire body goes rigid, shock reverberating through your spine and forcing you to halt as your mind goes blank. But steamy water brings you back to life, drenching your shirt and upper thighs when Mr. Hampton jumps from surprise.
The rude awakening makes you lock in.
The scream. It sounds like...no, you know it came from the west wing...where Gojo is.
And Yuko.
Hurried steps rush past your door, sounds of multidirectional distress and frantic shouts echoing through the corridor—staff members and patients alike swept into a whirlwind of panic.
You're number one, dropping the scrubber and scrambling to help Mr. Hampton out of the tub, hands shaking as he grips them.
A security guard bursts into the room, face ashen and jaw tight.
"Nurse! We need everyone in the west wing, immediately!" The command is sharp, laced with an urgency you've never seen before.
And immediately feel responsible for.
"There's been an incident."
Without another thought, you wrap Mr. Hampton in a towel, trying your best to assure him that everything is fine when your obviously trembling body said nothing was. His confused gaze follows you as you lead him back to his room, the commotion in the air moving him a lot faster than earlier before you rush back out heading straight for the west wing—where chaos reigns supreme.
The usually pristine floors, normally squeaky clean floors due to lack of traffic, are now barely visible. Staff members crowd the familiar hall for the first time since Gojo made it his own, filling the space with more bodies than you were used to and making it difficult to find the source of trouble.
Not like you needed to. The truth is painfully clear.
It's disrespectful even to even pretend you don't know exactly what went wrong, and your heart feels as if it'll burst from your chest any moment now just thinking about it. Crushing guilt wrapped you in its clutches, but it was nothing compared to the pain you might've caused.
You push through the masses, clumsily bumping shoulders, heart beating into your ears making the world seem quiet as you inch closer and closer to disaster. Dragging imaginary shackles on your feet with each step until you all but collapse once you spot it.
Gojo—barely restrained by guards, straitjacket nowhere in sight—standing absolutely furious.
And for the first time today, time seems to slow down, your mouth becoming suddenly dry mouth when you look past him.
Yuko.
Halfway out the door to his room. Sprawled out on the ground. Bruised, unconscious, and no signs of breathing.
Your hands fly to your lips, mouth agape. Murmurs from the crowd swirl around you as attendants rush to Yuko's side, knocking into your pathetic frame as you stand too frozen to move.
They gently pick her up, careful to handle her motionless body and place her on a stretcher. Her usually vibrant face is drained of color, twisting the dagger in your chest when you spot the subtle rise and fall of her chest. Fighting for breath.
Fighting.
It hits you like a hammer.
Someone as kind as her, so full of light, love, and joy, always greeting you with warmth and empathy and capacity every time she sees you, should never have to lift a finger let alone fight for her life. The sight is too much to bear.
Waves of helplessness crash over you and you can't even look at her. Regretting with every ounce of your being that you sent her in your place. Knowing this could happen. Concerned only with your silly wants and needs.
But you're so confused.
The ward should have weakened Gojo—Yuko should have been fine. The only threat Gojo has up his sleeve is mental torture but Yuko might as well be Freud. Her mind is sound, strong.
And that's where you fucked up, forgetting that Gojo's pure strength, especially when he's lost his fucking mind and triggered, is stronger.
Even with his security system in place, the devil was still powerful enough on his own. And like this was some sick and twisted experiment to figure that out, Yuko was the one to pay the price.
"I warned, I WARNED YOU!" Gojo's words pierce the overlapping voices like a sword, drawing everyone's attention to the strange interaction between the two of you. "I don't like to be touched by strangers, Nurse." Guards struggle to restrain him as he tugs and pulls away.
All eyes fall on you and you can feel the tense stares. The unspoken judgment.
Why was Yuko here in the first place?Where was Seph’?How’d he get out?How did this happen? 
You don’t know if the murmurs are real or only in your head, but the effect is all the same, making you wish you could completely vanish.  You stand like a deer in headlights—and they're so fucking bright.
Gojo brims with malice and amusement, chaotic energy pulsing from the hellish man and threatening to send sparks flying. As if he's daring someone to be brave and push the button.
But despite his outward display of dominance, the pure rage on his face making you feel sick to your stomach about every decision you've ever made, something...uncertain lurks behind those fiery eyes.
Something like...apprehension.
Like he knew he had done something wrong.
Words escape you, as if anything even needs to or could be said. But fear and guilt soon turn to anger and threatens to consume you. Ready to eat you alive and spit out the bones with disgust.
You are not a victim.
You have no right to stand here, spineless, shocked, or feeling even a little sorry for yourself.
Your fists clench as you hold back tears. 
What was done was done. And someone needed to pay.
But you exhale, thoughts shifting to Yuko as you take a good look around at the results of what happened the last time you decided to punish Gojo. All of your actions, even now, rooted in selfishness. Like you've learned nothing.
You push down the knot growing in your stomach and turn away to follow the medics.
Your friend needed you more than you needed revenge.
And Gojo didn't deserve any more of your attention, even if it meant risking your job or even your life to turn your back on him.
And there's nothing Gojo hates more than being ignored.
Struggled and strained noises grow louder. Guards tighten their grip on the fuming man whose raw strength outnumbered thousands of them even without his cursed energy.
You look back, their determination to keep him contained makes you nervous—you don't want anyone else to get hurt and Gojo knows that.
You're painfully aware that your decisions have put you in this position, watching the guards' valiant but increasingly pointless effort to prevent Gojo from causing further harm.
But it's an obviously losing fight, and the unease on their faces is unmistakably clear.
You wonder why they don't just run like hell.
"Let's go," a guard barks, but Gojo remains fixed in place. Moving a boulder would be easier.
"No, I'm filthy," Gojo protests, smirking, "And if I don't have my bath soon, there will be hell to pay."
He sees no one else in the room, eyes locked only on you, his expression a menacing promise that would send anyone else running for the hills. A look that says, "Try that shit again, and there will be casualties instead of mercy."
Reinforcements are called but it'll never be enough. Not even the goddamn military. Gojo...is the strongest, after all.
"Stop this."
Your cry freezes the room, plunging everything into a tense silence.
You hesitate, fuck, what should you do?
What can you do? No one else can suffer—no one else should suffer. Because of you.
You take a deep, shaky breath, silently apologizing to Yuko.
"I'll do it," you say firmly, "Just stop this and...and I'll give you your bath. Please—" The sharpest pang you've ever felt cuts through you. "—just don't hurt anyone else."
Pathetic.
But necessary.
He looks into your pleading eyes in surprise, amazement even, then smiles.
The submission in your voice sounded better than he could ever imagine. Like sweet music feeding his already inflated ego.
The guards exchange uneasy glances, clearly unsure of how to proceed.
Gojo's strength is undeniable, and it's evident that restraining him forever is not possible.
And you know offering to give him what he wants is risky as hell...but this was your doing. Your mess to clean up.
You squeeze your sweaty palms and give a decisive nod, signaling to the guards to let him go. They hesitate, then reluctantly agree and step back, leaving Gojo standing smugly before you.
You close your eyes and breathe, hating the idea of looking at him, but needing to stay strong. For Yuko. And everyone else in the ward.
Gojo's satisfied grin says it all.
Let's get this over with.
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The squeaking of your shoes has never been this loud, each echo bouncing off the empty halls and reminding you of how alone you are.
Alone—with a psychopath.
A bit more docile, doped-up psychopath but, the man could probably still rip someone's head off if he wanted to.
Still Gojo despises anything that alters his body—mentally, physically, all of the above. Alcohol, medication, coffee, energy drinks—anything that threatens his need for absolute control.
But he also needed to compromise, and you refused to be alone with him again unless he took something stronger. Otherwise, it would be you, all the guards in the ward, and a pay-per-view premiere of his bath time.
He knew he had to agree because his ass is not for free, but only if you took it as well.
You blinked, hard.
You knew he would be skeptical—hell, it could be poison, and he wouldn’t blame you. But to suggest something so ridiculous?
"Half, then," he said, as if that made his suggestion any less idiotic, but, surprisingly, as you waited for your supervisor to dismiss the insane idea, the back and forth with Gojo actually didn't save you. And there was no need to ask why. The entire ward shot daggers at you any time someone walked by now.
She reassured you that you'd be fine, the mild tranquilizer would be out of your system by the end of the day, then patted your back as if to say, "lay in the bed you made."
It felt unreal, holding the familiar pill between your fingers, one you were used to dishing out but now had to take.
With a quick snap, you broke it in half, holding the half-pill out to the leering man. Gaze unwavering, he leaned forward and parted his lips, waiting.
You took a deep breath and placed them both on your tongues, but he couldn't pass up this opportunity to feel you and closed his lips around your fingertip with a quick lick before you snatched away.
But it wasn’t quick enough to avoid the tingles shooting up your arm as you swallowed without needing the water you had set aside, a confusing mix of emotions churning as it spread through the rest of your body.
He made good on his promise and swallowed his own, still watching you with a knowing look. And damn him, he's probably still thinking about it.
The guards carefully lead you and Gojo to his private bathroom—they're more there for show than for protection, but you'll take what you can get, and they keep a firm grip on his replacement straitjacket.
You trail behind, mind buried with thoughts of what to say once you're really alone with him.
The door shuts behind you followed by the familiar sound of a series of locks clicking shut. "We'll be right outside," one of the guards mutters, eyes shifting between you and Gojo. A stereotypical hint lacing his voice, but even he probably doesn't believe it.
"Perv," Gojo sneers. And laughs, but you don't find a damn thing funny, keys to his jacket digging into your palms as you spin around the face him, furious. Debating on whether to slap him, kick him, or knock his teeth out. Or be particularly evil and just let him sit in the shower, fully restrained and drenched in cold water. A move you know would do no good but show him exactly how done you are with his shit.
"That isn't funny. None of this is funny. You've hurt someone—you hurt my friend."
His laugh fades, smug expression slipping from his face. Even you're surprised.
...oh shit.
You're actually confronting him.
The intense words burn through his usual arrogance, leaving a heavy, uncomfortable silence between you.
Then, for a fleeting second, his face does something weird.
Something you haven't seen before as his eyebrows draw together. Is that...regret?
"I'm sorry."
The record scratches.
...the hell is this??
You squint at him.
The words were muttered, reluctant, but there they were, hanging in the air between you.
"It...won't happen again."
And he's serious, the same seriousness you see when his heart races when you take his vitals...but why? Because an apology? From him?? Unheard of.
Gojo has said some nasty things to you in the past that you've immediately scolded him for but he's never apologized. He'd make a note when certain jokes didn't land, but he never took them back, preferring to cut out his own tongue rather than waste his breath being sorry.
You know better than to take anything Gojo says at face value, but...what the fuck??? You almost feel offended.
He has to be joking, fucking with you to dig even deeper under your skin.
Or is he?
Now you don't know how to feel.
He's so good at that. Stealing the air back and hanging his words in them. Tempting you to pause and even consider if he truly meant them. If he could mean them. The mind games are endless.
But then, the familiar cockiness returns, along with that smile that twists your stomach into knots.
"Now," he says, strutting towards the stalls, "let's get this bath started, shall we?" And his easy, but confident steps call you to follow, a stark reminder of who you're dealing with. But he never knows when to quit. "Or should I really have to suffer for my actions?" and the bastard pouts.
Though you know he's being sarcastic and not to feed into his taunts, you can't help but wonder—what would suffering even look like for someone like Gojo?
Violence? Physical pain? A slow and agonizingly painful death?
But the guy is damn near invincible. What on earth could hurt him?
Whatever it was, it would have to be his absolute worst nightmare, but nothing comes to mind other than frustration.
Damn it, you have to keep making choices.
Return his energy or keep it professional? Tolerance or revenge?
"Apologizing won't cut it," you snap and gesture at his jacket, wondering how the hell he slipped out of the first one without leaving a trace. "And no tricks, or those guards will be back in here faster than you can tell another joke."
Smooth.
Gojo sighs sooo dramatically, like he can see straight through your little kitty claws. "Fine, fine. Loosen up," he drags, "I won't cause any trouble. Just don't go getting any ideas now, Nurse." He finishes with a wink.
He's insufferable—but despite your smoldering anger, tendrils of doubt still creep in.
Your fingers slightly tremble as you begin to unfasten his straps, but each click feels a bit like victory. A fragile illusion of your 'control'—at least for now because at the end of the day, Gojo had chosen you to listen to. And after today, he's sure you won't forget there isn't room for anyone else.
The jacket falls with a heavy thud, your eyes immediately scanning his upper body in search of any signs of injury or stress. The cascading bruises on his arms surprise you.
They feel so feeble in your hands, the jarring evidence of him not as invincible as he seems. Pale, weak, and resting between your fingers. Devoid of the power that makes him so feared.
"Never seen bruises before," and he tilts his head, "at least not on me"
You hope Yuko was at least partly responsible for the marks on the villain, but they appear self-inflicted, and he's not as mobile.
Fuck, now you'll have to bathe him too. But it's strange, seeing him like this. Even weirder knowing that he could still do damage in this state and you can't shake the feeling of this temporary 'truce'. If it isn't obvious by now, you've learned that Gojo always has something up his sleeve.
Warm water soothes you a bit, flowing over your fingers into the large white tub—pristine, imported from somewhere far away and standing on decorative claw feet. Your eyes wouldn't stop rolling the first time you saw it, completely annoyed with Gojo's over-the-top alterations and sense of style, but you'd be a liar if you said you never thought about sinking your body into it.
The best you could do was cope with the little porcelain tub in your apartment, and you get lost thinking about how you'd love to take a long, hot, and steamy bath when you get home—if you'll even have the energy. There's no way you'll be leaving early now, not like you deserve it, and feel sick even thinking about it. You doubt you'll even have a job tomorrow.
You look so defeated Gojo thinks, sauntering forward, lifting the hem of his shirt. You turn away, focusing instead on the temperature of the water but the rustling fabric as he pulls the shirt over his head and pants to the ground sends heat to your cheeks.
He certainly isn't lacking in physique, even in his current state, but still, you wonder how such a slim but toned frame could be so...powerful.
Could you be more obvious? Your flickering eyes are so telling, darting between him and the water, but he catches your gaze from the corner of his eye as if he's read your mind. So cute trying to hide away your thoughts.
You toss in his loofah, "Well...go on. Your water's ready." But Gojo can only grin, amused by your attempts to look away despite seeing his muscled frame a number of times. Still managing to fluster you.
"Your shirt," he eyes your top, "Your pants. Looks like you've already started without me."
The water stains from earlier sit beautifully across your chest, not yet fully dry, and drawing his eyes to your semi-erect nips.
His teeth tug at his bottom lip, eyes shamelessly raking over your hefty chest. "Always such a tease, aren't you, Nurse?"
You grit your teeth, cursing the swirling conflict in your easy heart, fully aware of the thin line between professionalism and this game of intimacy he just refuses to turn off. Everything was always a game no matter the circumstances. And he loves to push your buttons.
"Just get in, Gojo," you order, and after what feels like an eternity, the silence is broken by splashing water as he steps into the bath.
He slowly sinks in, sighing at the warmth of the water. Ringlets of steam engulf him, almost making his silky white hair disappear with it.
His arms string over the rim of the tub, a look of relaxation resting on his face as if he's had a long, hard day. You resist the urge to slap it off.
Sudsy bubbles form from the solution you pour under the faucet, hoping to shield your eyes from his body. You've seen enough today and expect the mini-rebellious act to piss him off, but as the bubbles grow, so do his eyes. He picks up a handful and actually starts playing with them.
"Nice touch," he adds, blowing them right into your face, and you watch with a tight lip as he decorates the bathroom with them, knowing you'll be the one to clean it all up.
He sits a crown on his head and gives himself a bubble beard, nipping your nose with some that you're quick to wipe away.
His pale eyes flutter, settling on you in a curious way.
He leans, arms flexing over the edge—steam-slicked sweat dripping down his face that he doesn't bother to wipe away. "I'm ready for my sponge bath," he says, and if it was hard to take him seriously before, it's damn near impossible now—especially with this ridiculous bubble mustache.
Sickening, him managing to still be so playful, so unserious, at a time like this.
You know Gojo's unhinged, yeah, quote, "mentally unwell and a literal danger to society, tf did you think??", but to nearly take someone's life and then make jokes afterward?
God, you feel so stupid, walking around him like you were the shit but with the wrong guard up the whole time, playing right into his hands and accidentally rewarding this grown-ass man who likes to play with bubbles.
The reality of your circumstances replays in your head, the story of how you ended up here, coddling this monster. Still confused as hell as to why it had to be you.
But then again, this was your job...right? To heal. To help those who can't help themselves. To offer redemption, no matter how twisted they seem.
Loofah in hand, you resist the urge to roll your eyes for the 400th time today. "Keep talking like that and I'll stop, Gojo," you say, reluctantly drenching the tool in soap before gently washing his back.
He sinks into your touch, closing his eyes and letting his body completely rest on the cool cast iron, breathing. Feeling like he's won no matter what you say because your scrubs feel like magic.
Across his arms and over his broad shoulders, you work your way down, bubbles glistening in your trail as you're careful not to miss a single inch of skin but don't linger too long.
Every now and then, you catch glimpses of his marked skin between the foam and because you hate yourself, your brain absolutely refuses to give you a break. You have to give kudos to the dedication to his craft. The muscle definition, the scar tissue telling stories of battles won. Evidence of his past before corruption. Everything it takes to be a hero.
It's unsettling, yet fascinating, the polarity between his beauty and his monstrous deeds.
This is another first for you, this level of care. Gojo usually just hops into the shower and takes care of himself as you wait outside—easy and thorough but always taking his sweet time, all while loudly singing some annoying song that inevitably gets stuck in your head.
But after today, it'll be impossible to trust him or you again, and the hushed whispers as the guards walked you both to the restrooms made that abundantly clear.
The pitiful thoughts seep into the way you hesitantly clean him, moving down to his chest and abs and making sure to avoid more sensitive areas, but the malicious glint in his eyes is unmistakable.
"Whatsamatter, Nurse?" Gojo taunts, feeling you slow around his lower region, "Afraid of gettin' too close?" And you can't believe you're praying for a speedy recovery so he can handle this himself.
You ignore his comment, trying to get this over with as quickly as possible. You're humiliated enough as it is and he can sense it, mocking you with a laugh.
"You're so uptight. Can't you just relax and enjoy the view?"
You want to scrub his cocky brow right off his face. "Just doing my job," you mutter, twice squeezing the loofah that feels a little funny in your hand as the soapy water rinses his chest.
The water feels heavenly on his skin, but the subtle change in your movements makes his brows furrow. Slowing, more deliberate, heavy as if you're wading through molasses. You keep adjusting your grip but the material feels so strange—the texture almost too soft like it could melt into your palm.
Your breath catches when you brush his skin, not realizing how close your fingers drifted to the edge of the sponge, and though it was only a second, it sends an unexpected jolt through his chest.
The muscle relaxers. How could you have already forgotten, you both think.
But Gojo, ever observant, doesn't miss a thing.
His eyes narrow slightly as he watches you. "Feeling a little funny, Nurse?" his velvet voice teases.
"I'm fine," you lie, though you couldn't be less certain as the muscles in your hands start to relax more than you intended, the sponge gliding over his abs, down his sides, rhythm almost hypnotic and making the man's head fall back. You try to push through the haze, to finish quickly and be free of him, to try to regain your slipping control, but you're in a losing battle against numbness and heightened awareness.
ANd God, he has to bite his lip at your touch that feels so intense, a sensation too good to keep to himself that you obviously need to stop being such a tight-ass.
You need to loosen up in a way that medicine can't help. And Gojo knows just the trick.
He licks his lips, tongue curling over his canine before splashing a wave of water on you in one swoop.
Saying you gasp is an understatement as the steamy wash drenches your face and front once again. You've been hit not once, but twice in a day—a new personal record.
Instinctively, you reach up to shield yourself, the loofah slipping from your hand, but Gojo is quicker, wrapping his hands around your wrists and holding you in place.
A scream prepares to surge from your body when Gojo maneuvers both of your wrists into one hand and places a finger to your lips.
"Ssssh ssh ssh ssh ssh," he hushes, his voice a little too calm, "I'm not going to hurt you." He swipes a lone droplet hanging from your eyelash. "I just want you to listen."
You freeze, nerves on fire as you're forced into this close proximity for the second time today. Inches away from his face that softens.
Though you can easily call for help, you know better than to argue—he knows you know better but he never felt threatened in the first place.
Besides, he can feel your breathing slowing, the effects of the pill combined with his firm hold sending a faint buzz from your wrists to your stomach. His finger remains on your lips as he brings his closer.
"Now," his eyes flicker to your bottom lip, "You're so very good at your job, Nurse." He smoothly pulls it with his thumb. "That's why I like you. You're thorough but real. Just what I need to keep me sane."
Sane?
"Sane," he repeats like he's heard your thoughts. "Believe it or not, you keep me grounded...like a good boy. Be proud, not a single soul here or anywhere else can compare to my strength, let alone deal with me yet...here you are." He looks at you like you're a marvel.
"You can handle that...can't you?"
Words fail you. This feels rhetorical. Why does he keep torturing you like this? What is it about you?
You haven't really thought about it since your first few weeks with him but now he's forcing you to think about the little 'power' he's given you that he can easily snatch back.
What happens if he decides to go further than flirting?
You can't handle it, any of it, any of this.
You hesitate, unsure of what to say but know it could never be the truth.
Gojo must sense it because he leans closer, his breath warm on your cheek.
"If you leave, I just might crack completely, beauty." A breath you didn't realize you were holding slips. "How do you think everyone else will fare against me then, hmm?"
Gojo knows he's a prodigy, yet he still manages to surprise himself sometimes, eyes lingering over the spots on your uniform soaked through just enough to make the fabric cling—perfect aim.
Ice shoots up your spine from the heat of his unadulterated gaze, but you refuse to let him see you falter. He almost feels a prick from the daggers you throw with your eyes.
"Oh, don't be like that, Nurse," and he purrs, thumbs grazing your wrists in a mockingly gentle touch. "We all have our boundaries, right? I thought communication was key in a relationship."
"Let go of me," you find your voice, "We're done here."
Gojo slightly tilts his head.
Look at you calling the shots, he thinks. So strong, so very serious.
"God I can't help it," he breathes, "You're so fun to mess with."
He could laugh in your face, have his way with you, and show you that your resistance means nothing.
Instead, he slowly releases your wrists and lies back against the tub. "I know you think about it—there's nothing wrong with a little fun...right?" and though the connection is severed, you don't know if it's the drugs or just him that makes his amplified touch linger as you sheepishly rub your wrists.
Gojo watches you blush red—thoughts you didn't know lived within you rushing to the forefront as if he's pushed a button.
Grimy, raw, salacious, unwanted thoughts of forbidden fruit, wandering hands, and stolen touches in the dark. Wondering what his idea of "fun" was like under the sheets. With a psycho named Gojo.
You feel like you should throw up in disgust but the nausea never comes, instead you burn between your legs.
Fuck, you've got to get out of here.
You draw a breath, forcing away the torturous daydreams and quickly finish his bath.
"You should rest," you firmly say and pull the plug to let the tub drain. "And don't expect any more favors from me."
He sits up slow, his expression stone-cold as he slicks back his wet hair. Then he smiles. "I promise. Now dry me off?" he quips.
You ignore his request, swiftly handing him a towel before he can flash you. Gruffing, you lower to your knees and begin drying the floor of his messes, hoping to distract you from your questionable sanity.
Rustling fabric fills the chamber as he dries off, and when you figure it's safe, you look up to a nude Gojo. Still dripping with bubbles, hair plastered to his derpy face, and toned muscles, all the muscles, presenting themselves in all their glory.
The only things dry are his damn hands.
He throws the towel over over his shoulder, sauntering towards you with a wicked grin.
"Well, aren't you gonna help me put this thing back on?" He nods at the jacket he knows is more bullshit than security. "Don't want you getting all worked up again."
The first time your brain registered that Gojo was flirting with you was on your third day as his nurse.
"Well, aren't you a breath of fresh air?" Gojo was sitting on his bed, leaning against the wall. It was the second time he'd noticed how sluggish you looked while tending to him, suggesting with a grin that you must be quite the party animal.
Ha. If only.
You tsked, tossing his bedsheets into the hamper, and assured him that your sleepy eyes and dragging feet were the result of long hours and running on fumes. Having time for fun was just a dream.
"I don't get out much myself," he says, alluding to the situation he's in, wearing sarcasm like a necklace. "I love a good night in as much as anyone else but, I don't know. The stuffiness hasn't grown on me yet."
You tugged the collar of your scrubs—the air did feel a bit thick, like the room hadn't been aired out in ages and you couldn't help but wonder how long he'd been sitting in it—how he could. That alone would be enough to drive you up a wall.
Sunlight flickered in your eyes, and you raised your hand to block it, noticing the small window perched above his chair.
"Ah, let's open this then," you said, walking over and wrestling with the ancient wood for a moment before finally pulling the creaky flap up to the ceiling.
Standing on your tiptoes to reach it, a sliver of your midriff peeked out, but what captured his attention most was the way the sun rays washed your face. You scrunched your nose, the breeze sending wisps of your hair to tickle it, and he imagined the feel of them between his fingers.
The view was beautiful, you thought, hands gripping the warm bars. Trees surrounded the vast area, stretching out as far as you could see, the pathway to civilization completely covered in dense forest from this angle.
You never realized how high up his ward was—or how long the drop was from here.
"Too bad I'm not small enough to slip through those bars." He rubbed his stomach. "But you know me, 'Mr. BigBack.'"
He joked around as he usually did, looking to trigger your defenses, but your sentiment was...odd.
This was the first time anyone had cared to do something so simple for Gojo. And the closest anyone had gotten to him without their knees buckling.
The first two days of your trial, the Director had guards posted right outside of Gojo's door, their presence a constant reminder to stay alert and maintain a safe distance from the convict and Gojo was positive the mental barrier would keep a wall between you forever.
But then you laughed. A real laugh. Snickery and cute. Finding his joke funny instead of threatening.
It surprised him, that sound. And he wanted to hear it again and again and again.
"Who knew you could bring so much light into this place?"
Later at lunch, you sat with Yuko, having your usual midday catch-up. You never start with yours but she, like most people in the ward now, was absolutely dying to hear about how you were dealing with the villain of the century.
"He's actually not so bad...yet. Corny, but," you took a pondering breath, "He kind of thanked me today?"
She immediately scoffed and waved you off and who could blame her?
You were the anomaly he chose to show mercy to and now he was thanking you??
Being polite was too far of a stretch to believe, you must have been mistaken. But when you gave her the deets on why he'd do such a thing, she nearly choked on her apple. "He said that??"
"Ya?" You patted her back with a concerned look.
"Watch out, Casanova." She cleared her throat and did a nervous laugh.
Her comment threw you off for the rest of lunch, but when you thought about it later that night while surfing for new shows, a light bulb went off.
He flirted with you.
Thinking it was just another one of those literal dry-humor jokes or simply gratitude for making his stay a little less crappy, it flew right over your head. You always feel warm inside when you help people so you didn't think too much about it.
To you, it was just a kudos. Nothing more.
But the way the stands in front of you now is everything.
As bold and brash as it gets.
Fuck. Me.
And your body betrays you, sending all of the vulnerable sensations you've been fighting to suppress from your soaking chest, tingling wrists, aching thighs, and heavy breath, straight to your throbbing clit.
Air escapes you and you scramble to grab your supplies and leave.
Enough is enough. The guards outside can restrain him and escort him back to his room for all you care. You just have to get out of there.
Away from him.
Away from temptation.
Hot, overwhelming, guilty, mentally and physically unstable temptation.
In the quiet of the hallway a level below Gojo's ward, you lean against a wall taking deep breaths, completely disgusted with yourself.
How are you supposed to keep dealing with this, with him?
He keeps pushing and pushing and pushing you to the edge until there's nowhere else to go. You can only imagine the hell the nurses he didn't like went through.
Taking care of him isn't getting any easier, and now you were fucking up and making mistakes.
But you're the only one who can do this. Who must.
So suck it up. Play along, Stop thinking only of yourself. Pretend.
Pretend.
Pretend?
...
What terrifies you the most is the thought that you may not have to.
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You keep your scrambled thoughts to yourself when you're called into your Director's office at the end of the day.
You tell him the same story you told Yuko and take full responsibility for what happened, blaming it on exhaustion and needing a break. Swearing to never let it happen again.
By some miracle, you get to keep your job, though your one wish to leave early ended up costing you an hour and a half of unpaid overtime, and almost a friendship.
When you finally get home, you collapse onto your bed—images of the day, the ward, Yuko, flooding your thoughts, refusing to be pushed aside. You tell yourself that it's all just the guilt talking, just anxiety gnawing at your edges.
But then there's Gojo.
The most prominent one of all.
Staring you in the face with lifeless eyes and a ghostly smile. Tugging on your moral strings like a puppet.
When you close your eyes, you can't shake the feeling that he's waiting for you, a lurer in the shadows awaiting your every move.
Leave it. Leave it. Le—
You find yourself scrolling through your phone, deep-diving the web for information on your tormentor.
His past, his affiliations, anything to tell you who Gojo was, and who he is now.
The man is an anomaly.
Not much is known about him outside of mainstream news and internet rumors.
He's just this guy that kind of popped out of nowhere in the worst way possible. Conveniently on the tail of what could have been the most devastating incident in the history of Tokyo.
The media says he's a hero gone rogue but not much else. They damned him to hell and that was that. Even the Director disclosed very little about him during your briefing and you weren't allowed access to his files or records because it's all 'confidential'.
Nothing.
The more you search, you less that comes up. Not even silly conspiracy theories that you definitely thought would be riddling Reddit. The longer you scroll, the more you find yourself beginning to question your own sanity. Your interest. Sweet little buds of obsession.
Even though you hated taking it earlier, you actually need the pill now more than ever to relax, sleeping eluding you and mind wandering to imaginary scenarios as you stare at the ceiling. 
Tomorrow, you'll have to face Gojo again. And the day after that and the day after that and every day after.
In between your nearly non-existent off days, you'll have to seem him and decide what face you want to put on.
Because you simply cannot walk away.
After all, he's right—no one else can handle him like you can.
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extended angel's note:
when i originally decided to make this into short story, i had no plans on using a y/n perspective. it was just going to feature an OC name i’ve used in stories before, named Persephone, buuuut i decided to wanted to keep it immersive and include no physical descriptors/personality specifics bc i knew i wanted to upload it to tumblr. 
to keep it reader-friendly, yk? 
alas, Persephone has had her claws in me the entire time i’ve been editing and said with her whole chest that i couldn't just dismiss her like that chile. so i decided changed the perspective but keep her name in place of y/n. 
you won’t see it too often in the story bc it’s not super significant or said a lot in general, bUT it is relevant for a certain moment later in the story. you’ll know when you know 🤭. 
anyway, hope it doesn't bother you guys too much. and def feel free to mentally plug your name when you see it to keep yourself grounded into the story.
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tag list p.1: @reddiamondjazz @kiwismoother @rune1920 @blkkizzat @suguwife
@xerroe @enthyn @gloomuri671 @ressyshi @startatdawn
@khenanadeche @heijihatsutori @inluvkai @ixqiix @strawnanamilk
@rosso-seta @05-simply-06-simping @sims-4lifers @bratidol @rh-tg1
@hyunsuks-beanie @n1vi @luna-v-roiya @neteyamsluvr111 @supsiii
@natadecoco30 @chiyokoemilia @ririoutspoken @kyoxko @strawberrymilkshakes-posts
@nen-nyy @cinnamorochiroll @kazeniya @maybe7tommorow @sxnkuna
@misoyuh @lupitalove @sebastianlover @gojosatorubrainrot @sleepiebunniee
@mmmidkman @theonecrackhead @thathorsegotpoobrain @iveivory @samistar
@yuuan-66 @gojoslefttoenail @soyalovestoyap @winkwonks-world @thebiggestsimpforyou 
623 notes · View notes
nanaslutt · 10 months ago
Text
and they were roomates...
yuki x reader // wc: 7.k
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cont: fem reader, mutual pining, confessing, inexperienced reader, oral, fingering, humping, so much dirty talk, the dirtiest dirty talk ever, multiple orgasms/rounds, Yuki fucks you with a strap, rough sex, squirting, she talks you though it, Yuki is whipped
note: for the lovely @istyrrstars of course tehe... <3
MDNI
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
Yuki barely flinched when you opened the front door abruptly and slammed it shut behind you like you had a personal grudge agaisnt the piece of wood. You were supposed to be out on a date with your partner, but judging from your red cheeks and swollen eyes, it hadn't gone well. "Hey, sweet chee-" You cut your blonde roommate off with a curt, "Not now Yuki." as you walked behind her on the couch and made a b-line for your room.
Yuki's eyes raised in surprise, she can't remember a time when you ever snapped at her like that. She winched when you slammed your bedroom door shut with more animosity than you had shown the front door. Just what had happened on your date? Yuki knew you better than to let you wallow in your own sadness, you needed to talk to someone or you were going to spiral, and fast.
Yuki always was good at getting you to open up for her. A melodic knock was rapped on your door, the sound coming through muffled as you were buried face-first in the sheets, your arms crossed around your head. "Yuki, go away." You sighed, knowing if she came in, you were going to spill, and the last thing you wanted to do was talk about what just happened. 
"I'm not gonna let you drink yourself dumb and avoid your problems, let me in." She said, a hint of what sounded like teasing in her voice. God, she really did know you well. You were planning to hit up your girlfriends and get all hot for a night out on the town that you would preferably not remember in the morning, thanks to the copious amount of alcohol you were going to consume. 
You stayed silent, sighing against your warm sheets, knowing she was going to do as she pleased anyway. Your thoughts were confirmed only seconds later when Yuki waited for a response that never came and decided to push your door open, letting herself in your room. You felt the bed dip as she swiftly made her way to the edge of your bed, her hands bracing her body up behind her on your sheets.
"You gonna talk to me, or suffocate yourself?" She asked in amusement, raising her eyebrows at you. You groaned dramatically against the sheets, rolling your body properly over, your hands slapping the sheets by your sides, dangerously close to hers. "Fuck, stupid fucking prick thinks he can break up with ME??" You said, your words coming out incredulously.
Yuki opened her mouth to respond, but you were faster than her. You shot up from your position and sat on your knees, getting in her face. "He made me look like a fucking fool in my favorite cafe!! What a dick!!" You continued, waving your arms around in front of you. Yuki was not listening to a word you were saying, but she knew. you didn't really want her to say anything, so it worked out perfectly.
Her eyes were scanning over your entire being, your mascara that had smeared under your eyes, your flushed cheeks, your expression when you were mad, the way your tits moved in your shirt with your dramatic movements, the way your thighs squished as you sat on them, yeah, she wasn't listening a goddamn bit. She would've felt bad, but as she looked at the premium eye candy in front of her that was her roomie, she really couldn't find any remorse for her actions. 
Once she got a fill of secretly checking you out, she looked up into your eyes for the first time since she entered the room. You were still babbling about your insignificant ex-boyfriend when finally focused, so she decided to cut you off, wanting to know why you were so upset exactly. "What's the big deal? Weren't you just telling me how you wanted to break up with him last week?" She questioned, tipping her head to the side.
"Yuki that's what I've been saying. That's the problem." You said, placing your hands on her shoulders and shaking them, making her angle her body to face you. "He was all 'I'm so sorry I have to do this- It's not you, it's me, bla bla~,' acting like I actually give a fuck!!" You yelled, your face full of anger. "Acting so high and mighty like it's my loss," You scoffed before you continued, "Idiot never even made me cum. Shoulda yelled that in the middle of the cafe... tsk." 
Your gaze was fixed on the wall behind Yuki as you cursed your ex out over and over in your head, replaying what had happened just an hour ago. Every muscle in Yuki's body went taught at that last thing you had said. He what? "Hah?" She responded, her expression surprised. You averted your gaze from the wall and looked back at her, smiling in anger. "Right?! Together for a year, and he never once figured out how to make me cum." You said angrily, huffing. 
"I swear I could be a professional orgasm-faker." You tsked, sitting back on your heels as you dropped your hands from Yuki's shoulders, distancing yourselves a bit. "He never found out." You said spitefully, your lip curled in disdain.
Yuki's face felt hot, in fact, her whole body felt hot. She couldn't pinpoint what she was feeling. Anger? Jealousy? All she knew was she couldn't believe your ex had managed to bag someone as magnificent and perfect as you, and they didn't even know how to treat you right. She could feel her own lip curling in disdain, she wanted to find the man who selfishly used you for his own pleasure and knock him senseless.
Yuki has been fawning over you secretly since the day you moved in together 2 years ago. She liked to think she made it quite obvious too. Always complimenting you, 'accidentally' walking in on you changing, purposefully turning the music down in her headphones so she could listen to someone who wasn't her, fuck you into your sheets. She dried your hair in front of the TV after your showers, held you when you couldn't sleep- and after all this time you hadn't caught on.
Maybe it was partly Yuki's fault, she always did joke around with you a lot, hiding her true feelings with smiles and teasing disguised as jokes just in case you found out and didn't feel the same, or worse, hated her. She didn't think she was one to care so much, but she overly cared when it came to anything involving you. She was a woman whipped.
"How did he not notice? Is he incompetent?" Yuki spat, her anger showing with her words. You laughed at her words, "Hah! Probably, or maybe I'm just that good of an actor. Y'know, after 20 times of teaching him where the clit was, I gave up. Shit is so fucking exhausting." You sighed, rubbing your hand over your face. Yuki's blood was very much still boiling, but she blushed at the thought of you teaching her how to touch you instead of him, at least she would actually do it right. She would make you feel so good. Unlike your ex, she knew how to listen. 
"Has anyone made you cum before?" She asked curiously, keeping her expression almost unreadable save for the animosity in her tone and her raised eyebrows. You licked your lips before dropping your hand from your face and looking at her. Her heart dropped in her stomach when you shook your head no. 
"You poor thing." She said quietly, making your heart swell. Your face grew hot at her words. You don't know what you expected her to say, but it wasn't that. "I know, I just wish I could find someone who could fuck me right." You sighed, flopping lifelessly back agaisnt your sheets, your body sprawling out against them.
Yuki could hear her heartbeat vividly in her hears, it was the only thing she could hear. This was her chance, you had set her next words up for her there was no other perfect moment than right now. Running her soft hand up your thigh she smiled when you twitched under her at the unexpected feeling, staying still otherwise.
"You want someone to fuck you properly?" She repeated, making sure she didn't imagine you saying those words. You nodded, pouting at the ceiling as you replayed today's events over in your head for the nth. "Are you okay with girls?" Yuki asked, licking her lips as her eyes followed her fingers rubbing over your shin, inching closer and closer to your knee before they caressed back down.
You two had talked about everything under the sun, but somehow, this had never been brought up. In your direction at least. You knew Yuki liked girls, but the fact that you did too never came into conversation strangely enough. "Yeah, I'm bisexual. I've never been with a girl before like that but... honestly, I might have better luck in the bedroom department if I go that direction." You said, pursing your lips in thought.
"What about me, are you okay with me?" She asked, her hand breaching over your knee, teasing the skin just above it as she leaned closer to you. You froze as her words came together in your head. Was she serious? You could never tell when it came to her. She had joked about sleeping with you many times before but... she didn't seem like she was joking right now.
"H-how so?" You asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious. You felt a your heartbeat between your legs once the implication of her words were realized. "I'm saying I can fuck you, and make you cum." She said nonchalantly, licking her lips. "If that sounds alright with you." 
Truthfully, you had always had a thing for Yuki but you, much like her, were too scared to actually confess. Each time she teased you, you replayed her words over in your head like a mantra. Her small touches made your skin feel like it was set on fire even hours later. You thought of her while you touched yourself, closing your eyes hard as you tried to picture Yuki's fingers inside of you instead of your own.
You deflected her teasing every time, shoving off her touch or tsking at her words as you took them all at face value, not wanting to give yourself a false sense of hope. She's the reason you were always in relationships. You tried to distract and busy yourself with anyone who would show you attention, waiting for your feelings to dissipate, only they never did. Even as you lay in bed with someone else, the only thing you thought of was her.
"S-stop messing around." You said, quickly averting your eyes when you realized you'd been looking at her. Her fingers digging into your mid-thigh made you fight to keep your legs open, the heartbeat between them increasing. "Who said I'm messing around, hm?" She said, leaning over you so she had a clear view of your face. When did she get so close?
"I'm good with my mouth and fingers, but I have a strap too if you prefer." The way she was speaking so nonchalantly made you hot in the face. Your hands shot up without your permission to press over her mouth, stopping her from speaking anymore. "Y-yuki please, I don't know how to tell if you're joking." You said, your face scrunching in embarrassment.
Her expression softened to one that looked fed up. Her eyebrows returned to a lower place on her face, her eyes looking at you like you were dumb. Her hands wrapped around your wrist and pulled them off of your mouth, pinning them by your sides as she crawled on top of you, straddling your waist. Before you could protest, her lips were on yours.
Yuki was kissing you, she was really kissing you and it felt so good. Her lips were soft as she massaged your own with them. You didn't even have the time to process her actions before she pulled away and looked at you, her eyebrows raised in question, "Do you still think I'm joking?" You could now feel your heartbeat in several places throughout your body, and they all echoed in your ears and made you deaf to all other sounds around you.
 You pressed your thighs together and leaned your head up to close the distance again, pressing your lips to hers. Yuki's breath tickled your nose as she laughed shortly, kissing you back. You moaned in surprise against her lips when she pried your legs open with her thighs and made your legs go over her own, wrapping around her waist. 
You'd never seen her bring anyone home in your 2 years spent living with her, and she never talked about her endeavors with other people either, unlike you. So you really had no idea what to expect in terms of her experience, but with the way she was talking and moving, you guessed she must've had at least some idea of what she was doing. 
You wrapped your legs tighter around her waist, trying to press her against you to give yourself some friction. It seemed like she caught on because she pressed a knee against your clothed cunt, hard enough so she could feel you throb agaisnt her, even through your layers of clothes. You moaned against her lips, your hips jutting up against her at the incredible pressure.
"That feels good right?" She whispered against your lips, "When I press against your clit like that." God, you felt like melting. Only ten seconds into this and her dirty talk already far surpassed anyone you'd ever been with. You cracked your eyes open and nodded, continuing to kiss her. Her golden eyes were slightly peeled open as well and staring straight into yours. "Just wait till I use my mouth." She giggled, rubbing her knee in circles against you.
You moaned against her lips, your legs slipping from her waist the more she touched you. You weren't the only one who was throbbing, Yuki needed to get some of her own relief soon or she was going to explode. "You wanna touch me?" She asked, pulling away from the kiss. You felt her hot breath tickle your lips from the proximity of her face still, making you swallow hard.
You wanted to, so bad, but you had no idea where to start. "Don't worry, I'll teach you." She added, reading your mind. You nodded, letting her move you how she needed to. You made your arm follow hers as she unpinned one of them and flipped your hand up, facing the ceiling as she dragged it between your bodies. She kept her eyes on yours as your own followed where her hand was taking you.
You made a small sound when she pressed your palm against her pussy, cupping her over her sweats. "Right here." She said, trying to keep her voice steady. She grabbed your pointer and index finger and pressed them against what you assumed was her clit, if the gasp she gave was any indication. You watched with an aroused face as she helped you touch her. "Just rub them right there, exactly how you would touch yourself." She instructed, her eyes leaving yours as she looked between the two of you.
She sucked a breath in through her teeth when you curled your fingers up, rubbing agaisnt her clit. It was hard to tell what you were touching through her clothes, but that's where her voice came in. She was walking you through the whole thing, making it so you had absolutely nothing to have anxieties about. "Fuck..." She gasped, pressing her lips together.
The sounds leaving her lips were making a pool of your arousal seep into your panties. She was so hot like this, her face all blissed out. She retracted her knee and released your hand, bringing it between your own legs. She found your clit with ease, making you gasp alongside her. Your fingers stuttered agaisnt her when she made contact with you, her fingers drawing little circles against your clit through your pants. "Yu-ki." You moaned, looking at her for guidance.
"You're doing so good." She praised, nodding her head at you. You nodded back, your body jerking and eyes fluttering when she pressed hard agaisnt your clit. "Fuck, I can't take this. I need to touch you directly." She groaned, sitting back. Your hand she had pinned down was released, but you kept it there, frozen in place. 
You watched in awe as she crossed her arms over her body and took off her shirt, throwing it in some random direction. Her breasts threatened to spill from her apparently too-tight bra, it made your mouth water. Sure, Yuki had walked around in her underwear plenty of times, but you always looked away. Her body made you feel hot in places you didn't think you should feel hot in, but now, her body was yours to look at all you wanted.
"My eyes are up here." She giggled as she slid off her sweats and boxers alike, leaving her bottom half completely bare. You darted your eyes down briefly before they shot back up, too nervous to stare at her pussy directly. She smiled at that, watching you turn your head to the side against the sheets. Yuki leaned over you once more, trapping your smaller body underneath hers, her hands by your head. 
"You can look at my tits but not my pussy? Hmm?" She teased, tilting her head at you, trying to get you to look at her. "Would you rather touch it?" She asked, finally getting your attention. She'd never seen you so coy and embarrassed, she couldn't help but think how cute you looked. This time of your own volition, you nodded before reaching your hand down between her legs and pressing them against her.
You watched her face intently. Her eyes fluttered when you touched her clit, and she hissed through her teeth when you ran your fingers through her folds. She was so wet and warm, even more so than yourself, you thought. "Fuck." She gripped your wrist and pulled it off of her before she grabbed under your arms and made you sit up, sitting back on her heels. "It's not fair you're the only one undressed." She said.
"Up." Came her command to raise your arms so she could remove your shirt. She paused to stare at your tits, a perverted expression appearing on her face. "Heh, cute tits." She said bluntly, making you look away in embarrassment as she worked on getting your bottom half bare like you. "Now we're even." She said, smiling as she admired your body.
She bit her lip shamelessly staring at your pussy, her head cocking to the side to get a better look. "D-dont stare at it." You said, covering your face. Yuki spread your legs, pushing your body in on itself as she held you by your ankles, your cunt on full display for her. "Why not? You have such a cute pussy." She smirked. "Look she's twitching for me and everything, how adorable." You were forced to grip the sheets by your body as Yuki manhandled you, ogling you as she wished.
Before you could protest about her shameless staring anymore, she was leaning down towards your pussy, making your heart stop in your chest. You felt her tongue abruptly lick along the length of your pussy before she pulled back to swallow your essence greedily. "Fuck, wanted to taste this pussy for so long." She mumbled to herself before she dove back in. You moaned dramatically when Yuki's plush lips sucked your clit into her mouth, your hands shooting down to grip her hair.
"Mmmm..." She moaned against you, shaking her head back and forth as she flicked her tongue agaisnt your stiff bud. "Fuck! Yuki!" You moaned, your head falling back against the sheets, shaking from side to side at the intensity of pleasure you felt. "Feels good getting your pussy properly ate hm?" She asked, her tone coming out teasing and confident. You nodded, your moans choked as they left your mouth, "S-so good, your tongue feels so good-" You cried.
"Told you I'm good with my mouth." She smirked before she dove back in, running her tongue over your folds. Her pussy was dripping at this point, making a mess of the sheets as she humped against nothing, trying to relieve herself. She adjusted her position, placing your legs over her shoulders as she laid down on the bed, her stomach pressed against the sheets. You were confused about the change in position but your questions were promptly answered when you felt two of her slender fingers prod at your entrance, making your eyes shoot open in surprise.
She faced little resistance as she penetrated you, immediately curling them against your g-spot, making you see stars. It was at the exact moment she sucked your clit back into her mouth that you felt your orgasm build out of nowhere, threatening to spill at any second. You pressed your thighs around her head tighter, your hips jerking against her face as your body prepared itself to cum.
Your fingers raking against her scalp made her moan against you, her legs crossing as she humped against the bed, using her thighs for relief. "C-cumming fu-ck Yuki I'm-" You barely got the words out to warn her before you were spasming all over her tongue and fingers. She moaned against you as she worked you through it, her fingers assaulting your sweet spot as she helped you cum.
Her tongue greedily lapped up all the juices that spilled out of you as you rode your orgasm out on her tongue as she shook her head. You were twitching agaisnt the sheets when she pulled back, sliding her fingers out of you slowly. You laid there shocked, you have never in your life cum so hard, so fast. "Such a good girl, how do you feel?" She asked, crawling up your body so her legs were between yours, her face hovering over you.
You nodded, still blissed out. "You're really good at that." You praised, making her giggle. "So I've been told." She responded, making you pause. That's the first time she'd ever said anything insinuating she'd done something like this with other people. You figured, but it still felt strange to hear. Maybe not strange, more like, you felt jealous. Had her other partners had more experience than you? Could they make her feel better? Did she like them more than you?
Your thoughts were stopped in their tracks by her lips against yours. You scrunched your eyebrows together, surprised by the kiss. "What are you thinking about, hm?" She said, tucking your stray hairs behind your ear. "Don't think about anything other than me. You might make me jealous." She smirked, kissing you again. In that instant, you forgot all of your negative thoughts and worries as they were washed away by her lips.
"I... I want to touch you too." You whispered, pulling back from her lips. Your arms tightened from their place around her neck. A visible blush spread across her face at your honest words. She smirked before she wrapped her arms around your body and picked you up with ease, flipping your positions so she was on the bottom now, you straddling her waist. 
"Have at me~" She said, spreading her legs under you. Now that you were actually faced with touching her, you were nervous, but you were determined to make Yuki cum just like she had. Her hand caressed the side of your face before she slid it to the nape of your neck and pulled you down to her, making you almost chest to chest if not for your arms caging around her.
"I don't just let anyone touch me y'know. Better make good use of your time." She said cockily, pressing your head against her breasts. You hoped she was sensitive there, you wanted so badly to see her squirm from getting her nipples sucked. You wasted no time in reaching behind her and undoing her bra, with a little struggle which of course did not go unnoticed by Yuki, who had to tease you about it. 
Once the clasps snapped free, you slid the straps off her arms and were faced with her large breasts, lying right in front of you. You swallowed hard as you stared at them, they looked so soft, and her nipples were already hard, and a pretty shade of pink. Yuki had never felt so self-conscious before. It was rare that she let her partners please her to this extent. She preferred to be quite dominant in the bedroom so this was taking some getting used to.
"Hurry." She said, her face void of all humor and snarkiness, now replaced with raw arousal and need. You mimicked her actions earlier and pressed a knee between her legs, making her gasp as he pussy came into contact with the skin of your knee. You leaned forward and kissed her breasts teasingly before you found her nipple with your lips and suckled around it.
You earned a muffled sound of pleasure from Yuki, making you feel your own arousal start to pool between your legs once more. You whined around her nipple when she started humping your thigh, her wet cunt leaving a trail of her slick where she rubbed agaisnt you. Your other hand grabbed her tit, as much as could fit in your hand, and massaged the soft fat. "Suck harder." She instructed, her words coming out strained as she struggled to hold her voice back.
You obliged, sucking harder around her nipple, your other hand tweaking her right nipple between your fingers. You noticed her breathing pick up the longer you went on, even more so when you alternated between her tits, taking the neglected one into your mouth, your other hand pinching the nipple you sucked already.
Yuki's sounds started becoming more desperate and loud as you bit and sucked her sensitive breasts. Her moans were always cut short, most of her sounds being loud sighs and intakes of breath. She had been steadily grinding her cunt against your thigh for a few minutes now, her hips jerking each time you bit down on her clit. "Shit- shit-"
Her face relaxed and her legs started to shake as she came, her mouth dropping in a small o. Her nails scratched the skin of your back harshly as her body jerked against yours with the spasms of her high. You were caught off guard when she came from the lack of warning, but when you picked up on it, you did your best to make her feel as good as possible, pressing your knee harder against her as you played with her tits.
"A-alright alright fuck, ease up." She gasped, trying to sound nonchalant when she came down from her high and you continued to pleasure her. You pulled your knee back and popped off of her nipple with a sloppy wet sound after you realized she had come down. Looking up at her, you noticed her flushed face and lidded eyes as she smirked at you, her chest heaving as she caught her breath. 
"My nipples are so wet now, thanks to you." She teased, looking down at her chest, covered in your saliva and bite marks. You looked away when you realized the damage you had done. "S-sorry, I got a bit carried away." You apologized, averting your eyes. Yuki pulled your face down to meet hers as she kissed you sloppily, full of teeth and tongue. "I'll forgive you if you cum all over my cock." She smirked, biting her lip. The use of that word to describe her strap made you feel hot between your thighs.
You nodded, your breathing picking up at the prospect of her making you cum again. "Good girl." She praised, "Now get off me 'n get comfortable while I go get my strap, kay?" She asked, sliding out from under you as you rolled off of her and sat on the bed. You nodded, but you didn't really know how to do that. 'Get comfortable?' what position should you even get in?
You opted to just lay on your side and curl up as you faced the door, waiting for her to emerge again. When she did, your jaw almost dropped. Yuki walked in wearing a black harness that wrapped snugly around her thighs and hips, and in the center where her pussy was before, a bright pink cock now sat. Yuki was stroking it as she walked in, smearing the lube over it.
Her eyes raised unexpectedly at your position. "Did I not tell you to get comfortable?" She asked, continuing to stoke the silicone cock, making your mouth water. "I didn't know how you wanted me." You said honestly, moving so you were now sat on your knees on the edge of the bed as she stalked you slowly, walking up to where you sat.
You kept your eyes on hers when she came chest-to-chest with you, smirking. "You're such a good girl aren't you?" She cooed, grabbing your chin with her free hand. "Always want to please me, huh?" You felt like your heart was in your throat, you swallowed hard, trying to make the lump go away as she praised you, making your face feel hot as you nodded at her words. 
"I wanna fuck you from the back. Think you'll feel me deeper that way." She said, dropping your chin. You nodded before you scooted back, centering yourself more in the middle of the bed as you laid your front half down and kept your ass in the air, pussy on display for her as you arched your back sensually. You could feel yourself throb and clench around nothing when she whistled, walking around the end of the bed so she was staring at your dripping pussy before she crawled on top.
Her warm hands gripping your hips made you tense before you relaxed, every ounce of your being on edge for what was about to happen. Yuki smiled as she watched you wriggle your hips back against her unknowingly. A gasp left your lips when she spread your folds apart with her thumb and tapped the head of the cock against your tight little hole teasingly.
"Fuck, I don't know if I'm gonna fit." she laughed, rubbing the cockhead against your entrance. "Ur' hole is so small." She pulled your folds apart further, trying to see if you would open up for her. "I can take it, Yuki." You said, worried she wouldn't go through with this if she thought it might hurt you. The use of her name after such a statement made her pussy drip, she was so glad she had cum before this or she would've been aching right now.
"You think so, baby? Think you can take my fat cock?" She teased, pressing the head against your entrance. "Yes Yuki, please, please give it to me, s-stop teasing." You begged, trying to push your hips back against hers to make her strap slip in. "I don't know... It might be a tight fit. What if it's too much for you?" She cooed, pouting in faux worry as she worked you up even more.
You gasped each time she thrust the tip against you, almost penetrating you but not quite. Your whines sounded like cried as you continued begging her, rubbing your thighs together as you did so, she almost felt bad. "Okay you crybaby, only because you got dumped today and I'm feeling generous." She teased. If you were in a righter mind you would've shot back with something snarky but all of the air was stolen from your lungs when Yuki breached your tight entrance with her cock. 
You whined her name as she slowly slid the length of her cock inside you, one tantalizing inch at a time. "Shit you really are taking it, good fucking girl." She cooed, her eyebrows raising as she stared intently at your tight hole sucking in her cock. "H-hahhh- S-so big-" You choked, gripping onto the sheets for dear life. A loud moan was ripped from between your lips when she thrust the entirety of her cock inside you, the hard tip poking right against your g-spot, making you see stars in your vision.
"Yuki- f-fuck, fuck me, f-fuck me." You begged, the same whines and cries shes heard a thousand times in this very room. Only this time, her name was replaced with whatever shitty guy you had over, and fuck did it feel good. She started up a harsh pace, her hips making the fat of your ass ripple each time she fucked the cock inside you. "Yeah? You like that? You like my cock fucking so deep inside you?" She grit through her teeth, pursing her lips as she spoke.
You were already losing your mind, babbling incessant praises and broken cries of her name. "Oh fuck, you already go dumb on my dick? Heh, you like it that much?" Each time she referred to her strap as her dick it made your head feel fuzzy. "God I can barely move, you're squeezing me so tight. Wish I could feel you, fuck." She groaned, biting her lips as she fucked into you harder, placing one of her feet on the mattress for leverage as she drilled your poor cunt.
"Ah- ah- ah- ah-" Each time her hips smacked against yours vulgarly, a lewd sound was forced from between your lips, making your eyes flutter back in your head from the intensity of her thrusts. "Ah- ah- ahhahah, you're so fucked out pretty girl, makin' the cutest sounds for me." Yuki groaned, mimicking your moans in a high-pitched, whiny voice.
Her arm wrapped under your hip as she leaned over you slightly, her fingers finding your clit with ease. Your hand shot down to grab her wrist when she started rubbing quick circles over the hard bud quickly, feeling your orgasm start to build up already. "N-no-" You tried to cry, your protest getting cut short.
She mimicked you using a condescending voice, "No? No? You gonna cum? Is that why you want me to stop?" She moaned, leaning her body over yours completely, her weight being pressed agaisnt your back as she kept fucking harshly into your pussy, making loud squelching noises echo through the room. You nodded, your head turning to the side as you tried to look at her, your teary eyes finding hers.
With her other hand, she wiped your tears away before placing the thumb in her mouth, licking them off. "You wanna make me happy, right? Wanna be a good girl for me?" She cooed, nodding at her own words. You cried hard, fat tears rolling down your cheeks as the cockhead rubbed that special spot deep inside you. You nodded nonetheless, you wanted to be good for her, wanted to be the best she'd ever had.
"I know you do." She nodded, smirking at you, "So you're gonna cum all over my dick right now, yeah? Gonna make a mess?" She teased, feeling her arousal increase at her own words. God she really wished she had a dick right now, what she wouldn't give to fuck you full of her cum, or better yet, mess your teary eyes face up with her seed as she stroked herself off over you, your pink tongue out as you awaited her cum like her good little cumslut.
Your body writhed against her as you nodded, unable to form words any longer. She knew you were close because she could barely move inside you, you were squeezing the strap so fucking tight, and your eyes had rolled back in your head, and your jaw dropped open in a silent scream. "I got you baby, cum for me, cum all over my cock I got you." She cooed, working you through it before you felt the dam break.
"That's ittt- such a good fucking girl ohmygodd..." Yuki cooed as she leaned back, wanting to get a good view of the main event as your juices sprayed out around her cock, making a mess on her fingers and the bedsheets below as she continued to work you through your orgasm, her cock and fingers working in tandem to make you cum as hard as possible. Your body jerked uncontrollably as you came, your thighs shaking with such intensity as you squirted all over her, cumming for the second time in less than an hour.
Yuki slowly pulled out when your orgasm subsided, letting your body fall limp against the sheets as you crossed your legs and twitched in the aftershocks. Yuki smiled as your face scrunched in pleasure, eyes shut as you relaxed while she worked on undoing the strap so she could comfort you without a fake cock stabbing you in the back. Slipping her legs out of the holes she threw it to the ground and chased your body, wrapping around you from behind.
You were starting to gain some of your brainpower back, and her body cradling yours while her tits squished agaisnt your back only realaxed you further. "You did so well." She pressed a kiss to the back of your head as she spoke, squeezing your body tightly, her hands resting right under your tits. "How do you feel? Does it hurt anywhere?" She asked, pressing a line of kisses from your neck to your shoulders, her fingers tickling the skin of your tummy.
"N-no..." You lied, ignoring the soreness you felt in your cunt. It wasn't bad enough to bother her with anyways, you didn't want to worry her for no reason. "Good." She said, kissing the back of your head once more before she buried her head into your neck and stayed silent for an uncharacteristic amount of time. "Are you-"
"I really like you," Yuki whispered, cutting you off.
"I know." 
"Is that okay?"
"It's more than okay."
"Can I just keep holding you like this?"
You turned over in her arms, pressing a kiss to her lips, your legs entangling with hers. "Please. Don't let me go."
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chrisdr3 · 7 months ago
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"Ignorant" ~ OP81
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Fluff
Oscar x Introvert!Reader
Summary: Y/n gets hateful comments about her appearance and for being "ignorant", whilst Oscar tries to understand what's going on with her feelings.
You never really liked to talk much, you always were shy and tended to hide your emotions. You were more on the introverted side, like Oscar. When you were together, Oscar did most of the talking, especially when you were infront of fans, reporters and team members unknown to you.
That's the main reason the hate started. Most of it, at least. Every day, you were recieving hateful messages and comments on your social media. Everywhere you went, several fans that recognised you said things about you. Because of that, you started staying at home and you stopped posting stuff on your social. The worst part is that you distanced yourself slowly from relatives and friends.
At the last few races, you went on McLaren's hospitality from the back, avoiding fans as much as you could and avoided places of the garage that had cameras and media. You took your headset and hid in lonely corners or in Oscar's driver room, where nobody could reach you, and stayed there, sometimes crying and others just sitting and thinking. Feeling hideous and snub.
As the time passed, you started distancing yourself from Oscar slowly, thinking he hated you just like the "fans". He wasn't talking much either, so that's what you thought. You didn't really hug or cuddle him, you ate and showered alone, you spent hours locked up in your office room, reading books, and didn't sleep well at night, staring at the ceiling, trying not to cry. Long story short, you started avoiding him, too.
The fist days, Oscar thought you had to study for uni. Then a week passed and Oscar started to get worried. He wanted to help you, he wanted to talk to you, to find what's going on. He was cooking your favourite meals, bringing them to your door, tried to understand if you had a certain time of going out to shower, but you didn't.
One day, he checked your social media, just in case he found why were you acting like that. He checked them that same afternoon he came up with the idea and scrolled through your accounts, every comment he saw made him even angrier. He then posted something in response.
"I've repeatedly seen hateful actions and comments about Y/n and I want people to know that she's not ignorant or rude, she's an introverted person. So, I'm requesting from everyone to respect her. If there are still people out there, still hating on her through internet or irl, they'll stop being considered "fans" by me and will be reported. Thank you." That's what the post said.
He then waited till you got out to shower and stranded waiting in the doorframe if the closed bathroom door. When you got out, he moved infront of you and pulled you into a warm, bone crushing hug. "Why are you so distant lately, sweetheart?"
Tears escaped from your eyes, and you cried silently in Oscar's arms, staining his shirt with them. He didn't move, he rubbed your back gently. "That's it, let it out princess." You continued crying till you hadn't any more tears to shed, holding the towel around your body tightly, afraid it will fall.
Oscar cupped your face and kissed your forehead. "It's okay baby, I'm here for you." He whispered. "Talk to me, what took you away from me?" You looked at him, your face tear stained, sad. "Promise n-not to get angry?" You mumbled. "Of course, I can't get angry that easily, especially from you." He replied, caressing your hair.
You didn't leave his arms, snuggled in their warmth instead. "D-do you hate me?" You mumbled, looking at your feet. "Why would I hate you baby?" He responded, not getting his arms off you. "Because I'm"ignorant" and "rude" and "snub"." Oscar looked at you and smiled sadly. "It's the comments, huh?" You raised your head, a questioning expression in your face.
"I know about the hate you get. I saw it on your social and you don't know how many times I've heard "fans" talk to me or to other people about you when in races or downtown." He explained, ruffling yor hair. "Oh..."
"I'm here for you baby, I know you are shy and stuff but I believe in you. You can ignore them and you have the words to confront them." He smiled. "Can you try that? For me?" "I'll try..." You whispered. "Thanks, sweetheart." You kissed his cheek, adjusting your towel. Oscar noticed, he then grabbed your hand and led you to your shared bedroom. "Let's get you dressed, princess."
Taglist: @pinkswaet @dilemmaontwolegs @changetyre @thef1diary @f1driverszona
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dollarbils · 2 months ago
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did you break up with him? | b.e.
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billie eilish x fem!reader
context. you cheated on your boyfriend with billie, so she asks you to break up with him. when you see her at an event, she comes to see if you’ve fulfilled your promise.
warnings. smut kinda, fingering, harsh words/ degrading, mean billie.
part 1 masterlist
“there you are, pretty.” billies voice interrupted your conversation with your boyfriend. your cheeks burned up at the sound of her voice. you excused yourself from the conversation and he merely smiled and walked away, not a clue in the world.
“billie.” you said directly, no real point to the greeting.
“have you been avoiding me?” she came closer to you, resting an arm on the high table. her eyes doing the flirting for her.
“no? it’s not really socially acceptable to go up to your ex at an event your attending with your boyfriend.” she just smiled at your defence, invalidating it without having to speak.
“an ex your fucking, might i add.” she said this so openly that you scolded her, though her smile never faltered.
“ashamed?” she asked, the tone condescending.
“no.” her eyebrows lifted slightly at the response before the surprise left her face.
“good. at least one things changed.” she pulled you by the arm, forcing you to follow her wherever she was heading.
“billie.” the protest came out hushed, not wanting to catch attention or cause a stir.
“shut up.” she weaved her way through the tables, glaring at anyone who looked puzzled at your weak struggles.
“god would you stop moving.” you’d arrived in the girls bathroom and she’d pushed you into an empty stall, not checking to see if you were alone. she didn’t care.
“what the fuck billie?” you questioned her actions but she rolled her eyes before forcefully kissing you. she held the back of your head so that it wouldn’t press to hard against the wall while she basically sucked your lips off. there was nothing sweet about the kiss, nothing sweet about her grip on your hips. it was all rough and aggressive. out of either anger or frustration, you couldn’t exactly decipher it.
“you don’t learn, baby.” she shook her head softly, biting her lip while staring you down. your hair was already disheveled, and your lip gloss smudged. she spun you around and brought her body to yours, her firm grip on your head pushing your cheek into the wall.
“billie.” it was an empty cry, meant to achieve nothing.
“cry all you want, you’ll take what i give you.” her hand bunched up your dress so that it rested on your hips, exposing your underwear. her fingers traced circles around your covered entrance, but the fabric was so thin it drove you wild. you arched your back as her hands left your head, moving to your neck.
“so wet, baby.” she remarked as her fingers dipped past your underwear to find you practically dripping for her. she pinched your clit without warning, then moved her fingers to your entrance, circling it. you moaned louder than you’d wanted to and she squeezed your neck.
“be fucking quiet, you don’t want someone running over to your boyfriend. tell him who’s fucking you in the bathroom huh?” you were about to form words but her two fingers dove into you, stretching you out.
“such a slut, you should be ashamed.” her words were aggressive but it did nothing to lessen the growing knot in your stomach. one ready to come undone any minute.
her fingers took residence in your mouth, in attempt to quieten your whimpers. her body kept you flush against the wall of the bathroom stall, her fingers plunged deep into your wet cunt keeping you defenceless. drool started to pool out of your mouth but you couldn’t stop it, her fingers going deeper, brushing against the back of your throat making you gag.
“when you break up with him it’ll be my dick your gagging on and drooling for, baby.”
“did you break up with him?” she asked, referring to your boyfriend who she’d seen you with earlier tonight. it was an answer she obviously knew, but she wanted it to come from you. your muffled cries didn’t seem to provide an answer.
“hm? tell me.” her fingers were still deep in your mouth, contradicting her words. it took every ounce of strength in you to shake your head as she made a sound of disapproval. your walls were clenching around her fingers but she just kept curling them in all the right ways. you couldn’t think straight.
“didn’t think so.” her hand left your mouth and it took you a while to process what had happened, your mind in such a haze it couldn’t comprehend. but you weren’t bouncing on her fingers anymore. in fact, when you turned to look at billie, she was sucking your wetness off them, reminding you of your denied orgasm.
“billie, what the fuck?” you whined, you stared at you, her face void of emotion but her eyes dark and daunting. her fingers left her mouth with a pop as she poked the inside of her cheek with her tongue.
“hm?” her tone was innocent, as if unaware of the problem.
“you can’t leave me hanging!” you whined desperately while she silently revelled in it.
“you’re not my girl anymore, it’s not my problem. go ask your boyfriend to finish the job, i bet he can’t.” she shrugged her shoulders and unlocked the door to the bathroom stall. you were left utterly speechless.
“call me when you break up with him.”
part 3
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goldenhypen · 1 year ago
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⌏♡ ⎯ refusing their kisses !
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synopsis. when you refuse enhypen’s kisses as a joke
pairing. bf!enhypen x reader ⋅ genre. fluff ⋅ wc. 1.3k (about 0.15k per member, with jake’s as the exception <//3)
a/n. heart rate legit shot up imagining jake’s ngl :’> ,, but maybe that’s just the jake simp in me sjdjd ,,, enjoy y’all :’>
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이희승 …HEESEUNG !
you and heeseung were watching a show on the tv as it played in the background. with you two talking over the sound, he eventually turned his head to casually kiss you, but to his surprise, you leaned away from him, avoiding the kiss.
he furrowed his brows, narrowing his eyes at you suspiciously.
he leaned in again. and this time you stood up and started running away.
so of course, he had to chase you.
you two began dashing around the house, you doing your best to dodge his attempts at catching you. however, this didn’t last even fifteen seconds as he grabbed a hold of your arm, pulling you into his warm embrace.
“that’s not funny,” he said ironically while laughing.
your back was pressed against his chest as he ducked down to meet the side of your head, squeezing you tightly as he spoke lowly into your ear, “you’re mine.”
goosebumps ran across your skin at his words, and you turned your head slightly to face his.
and with his arms still holding you from behind, before you knew it, he pressed his lips against yours, kissing you deeply.
박종성 …JAY !
“okay, i’ll see you later, love you,” jay told you, leaning in for his goodbye kiss when suddenly you stepped back.
“what the-“ was his reaction, standing there narrowing his eyes with a small, growing smile.
but when you still didn’t move after a few seconds, his lips turned downwards into a frown.
“why’d you try to avoid my kiss?”
attempting to sputter out a response, you couldn’t find it in you to do it. you were too weak for him, and you gave in.
“it was a joke, i’m sorry,” you smiled, stepping closer and wrapping your arms around him.
not feeling the action being reciprocated, you pulled back and looked into his eyes, but they just stared at you blankly, unimpressed.
“i’m sorry, okay?!” you blurted out in defence. “i just wanted to see your reaction—it was really cute by the way.”
unable to keep up his act, he broke out into a smile, revealing his true feelings before hugging you back.
“very funny,” he said, shaking his head as he laughed. “so can i have my kiss now?”
your answer didn’t require words as you pulled him in by the collar, crashing your lips onto his.
심재윤 …JAKE !
jake was leaning in for a kiss when suddenly you shot your head away, looking at him and shaking your head no.
he furrowed his brows and gave you a ‘why are you being weird?’ look before shaking it off with a small smile.
“what are you doing?” he asked.
“nothing,” is all you gave in response.
so then he tried again, leaning in for your lips.
but you avoided him again.
“stop,” he frowned. “i’m trying to kiss you.”
but all you did was face your head in the other direction, stifling a laugh.
but from his point of view, at your lack of response and reciprocation, he scoffed under his breath before immediately taking your chin with one hand and whipping your head back to face him. and with his hold still on you, he dove in, quickly placing his lips on yours, and finally getting the kiss he longed for.
his lips were on yours for longer than you expected, the reason behind it probably deriving from his competitive nature and wanting to conquer his want of kissing you after you refused to do so for no reason.
but you couldn’t help but giggle against his lips at his dominant attitude.
if he was capable of the passion he poured into this kiss—which you never doubted him for in the first place—maybe refusing more kisses from him once in a while wouldn’t hurt.
박성훈 …SUNGHOON !
“here, kiss,” sunghoon said to you, puckering out his lips toward you, indicating what he wanted.
but to his astonishment, you had the audacity to take your fingers and turn his face away, rejecting his kiss.
his jaw dropped, and a smile started to form on his lips.
“are you serious?” he said, his eyebrows raising in disbelief.
you looked at him with as straight of a face as possible, but not after long, a hint of a smile was beginning to show.
he let out a laugh, shaking his head, pointing an accusing finger at you and your silly games. “okay, very funny.”
ending his comment, he leaned in for another attempt at a kiss from you.
but taking the opportunity, you refused once more by turning your head away.
“nope, you’re not doing that again,” he told you.
you looked back at him, and without even a moment to process, his lips were immediately on yours.
김선우 …SUNOO !
your boyfriend, sunoo, smiled at your words before leaning in for a kiss, and…
he was left with his lips unexpectedly meeting nothing as you turned your head away.
“hey, what was that for?” he asked you, slight annoyance growing in his voice.
in response, all you did was shake your head.
“what?” sunoo started again, unimpressed. “you don’t want kisses? please. but fine, whatever you say, i guess. no kisses for you then.”
he turned around and walked away, leaving you baffled at his reaction.
“hey!” you called after him. “it was just a joke.”
you frowned, and at your words, he turned around with a playful smirk before running back to you, cupping your cheeks with his palms, and pressing his lips deeply onto yours.
양정원 …JUNGWON !
with one of his hands resting on your lower back, jungwon pulled you in for a kiss. but before his lips could meet yours, you placed your hands on his chest, stopping him from doing so.
at your actions, he naturally gave you the cutest confused look you swear you could have ever seen. it melted your heart, and it took everything in you to stay strong and not break character.
“why are you doing that?” he pouted.
your heart was about to beat out of your chest at the look he was giving you. he was so precious.
you couldn’t do it anymore.
you frowned, taking his face in your hands and pulling him closer.
“no, it was just a joke, i’m sorry. here,” you said before pressing your lips to his, giving him the kiss he wanted.
a smile automatically rose to his lips before speaking, “that’s better.”
“yeah?”
“yeah.”
and with his last reply, he pulled you in for another.
西村 力 …NI-KI !
you and riki were sitting on the couch when he began leaning in for a kiss. and taking advantage of the opportunity to mess with him, you dodged it.
“what are you doing?” he laughed. “i want a kiss.”
you stared at him, doing your best to contain your smile, but you weren’t holding up too well.
he smirked at your behaviour and moved his face closer to yours, causing you to move back until your back met the cushions of the couch.
he kept going and placed both of his hands on either side of your head as he eventually towered over you.
though you probably could have found a way to escape, his actions had its effect on you, and your mind went cloudy, lost in the anticipation of what he could do next.
then, very slowly, he ducked down, capturing your lips with his and getting the kiss your hearts both ached for.
mission prank riki: failed, but you’d take that ‘L’ over a small joke any day when it meant sharing a moment with him like this.
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a/n. kinda strongly disliking the way this was written tbh but i had a hard time scrapping it all :’> maybe lmk what you think of it tho?
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just-a-ghost00 · 5 months ago
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What they think when they see you vs what they show (possibly 18+)
You can pick your group thinking about a crush, a lover or anyone you are curious about. But this has to be someone you know currently. It can't be a future person.
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Group 1
Their thoughts - 2 of cups, 7 of cups, 8 of cups, Strength, page of cups, knight of cups , back of the deck is The Sun
"I can’t let them know I like them. I can’t show them how I feel for them. I have to act strong. I can’t be vulnerable. My god, I wanna ask them out so bad. Would they even care? They would reject my offer, I’m pretty sure. They must like stronger individuals. Surely I’m not their type. I should better leave. But I can’t. I feel so drawn to them. Hell, what should I do?! Should I stay or should I go? God they’re so beautiful. But I can’t tell them, now can I? I hope they don’t notice I’m staring. Omg they’re looking. Act normal, act normal!"
For some of you this person may be in a connection with someone else already and they are trying to reason themselves and repress their feelings. For others, this person thinks you’re destined to be together but for some reason they are afraid to confess their feelings. It’s like in both cases, the person feels like your holding their heart in your hands. They feel like your hostage. They think you have a lot to offer and you are really independent so you wouldn’t need them nor be interested in them. It’s like they tell themselves "what would such a person do with someone like me? I don’t deserve them". They think you are generous and kind, very emotional. As sweet as the marine air, as beautiful as a sea shell. Water seems to be very important to this person. Reminds me of that Aphrodite painting where she’s standing on an oyster. You’re like a goddess/god to them.
They think that you bring so much light and optimism in their life. That your sweetness is a welcomed relief in their chaotic life. They want to bask in the feeling of you. They think a lot of positive things because they idealize you. You’re like an angel to them. A creature so pure that they wish to keep to themselves but are also afraid to hurt. It’s like they think they’re a beast and you’re the beauty. However in their mind there would be no happy ending for the two of you.
Their actions - ace of pentacles, 4 of cups, 5 of wands, 4 of wands, 3 of cups, The Emperor, 3 of wands
This person is doing their best to pretend they don’t care. They look as calm, cool and collected as they possibly can. They want to look professional and disinterested. I’m getting specifically the message that this person hides behind their spouse/partner to avoid being in contact with you or try to convince you there’s nothing going on. So either they would send their partner to interact with you or they would invoke them in conversations. Also they could be showing off their engagement ring as a reminder.
Another thing this person does is that they are always making sure they’re not alone in your presence. So if they interact with you, it will mostly be when there’s important gatherings, especially when there are other people around that they know. This way, their conversation with you would look pretty natural and mundane, even to your eyes. It’s like they’re taking you in doses. They would juggle between times of no contact and contact.
Though they want to look disinterested they also want to look their best, just in case lmao So they would literally puff their chest to look bigger or play with their hair to draw attention on them. They would wear their best outfit or accessories, put themselves in positions of power to impress you. They would act like they’re the next hottest thing. Also they would try to be brave so maybe they would do risky things or like act like a savior around you. Especially if they notice you’re in need of help. They would be the first to nonchalantly offer their help and remind you that "though they’re super busy because of their numerous responsibilities, they would do their best to help you out should you ever be in need ". This person feels really old school lmao Also they seem like the type of person that watches too many unrealistic rom coms lmao (or porn)
Group 2
Their thoughts - 7 of cups, The World, 4 of pentacles, The Empress, 8 of pentacles, knight of swords, 9 of wands
Okay this person’s thoughts are pretty intense and quite horny / kinky. If I felt like writing their actual thoughts for group 1, here I feel like this would be a bit triggering in some way. So I’m gonna describe as best as I can and as respectfully as I can lmao To be completely honest, this person is a simp for you. They want to "drink from you". I’ll leave that to your imagination. They think that you are incredibly attractive and 100% their type. They want to possess you. But they don’t want to rush it. They like the thrill of the chase. They think that they want to lift you up and have you as they please, against the wall or on any surface they could find. They think that the world lies at your feet and that they would give you the world if you asked them to. They think that, being the absolute baddie that you are, you would have a fair amount of options. And that makes them uncomfortable. Because this person doesn’t like to share their "meal". They think that they should carefully plan how they’re going to approach and seduce you because they know you won’t be fooled. They know they have to be clean and clear if they wish to have you by their side. They think you’re feisty and in your power. You bow to no one and take no orders and this person would loooooove to be the only one to "tame" you. They think that you’re a freak in the sheets. That you would match their intensity. Their thoughts are mainly sexual. There isn’t much room for feelings in this person’s mind.
Their actions - The Tower, Ace of cups, Page of swords, page of wands, 8 of swords, 8 of pentacles, 7 of pentacles
This person acts very unpredictably. One day they’re super open and sociable, fun and patient. The other they’re an absolute asshole. It’s like they’re trying to confuse you so that you don’t know where they stand. They appear as immature. They constantly contradict themselves. Either their actions don’t follow their words or it’s like they don’t think things through and just act randomly. They are chaotic in the way they communicate and act. But most of the time they are defensive and put up barriers between the two of you. They’re the type of person that would purposefully ignore your messages, leave you on red and then pretend they didn’t see it because they were "too busy". They play hot and cold basically. As if being shady was the key to success.
This person would also try to provoke meetings with you by inventing problems or persuading people to interact with you so they can get you out of trouble. They would also surprise you in unexpected manners to keep you entertained. Like they would gather information about you from stalking your social media or interrogating people around you and then give you exactly what you needed as they pretend it is only a coincidence. Like "hey I just got this chocolate from someone but I’m sick so I can’t eat them, would you mind eating them? I don’t want to throw them away" when they’ve clearly spent at least a solid hour looking for your favorite chocolate on purpose.
Group 3
Their thoughts - The fool, knight of pentacles, 6 of pentacles, The Emperor, 7 of swords, page of swords
"They look so calm and peaceful, so carefree. I wonder how they can look so good and be so calm when all around them seems so chaotic. They look so tired sometimes and sad even. I wonder if they're okay. They're so put together. I'd like to get close to them but I feel like they wouldn't be open to it. I wish they weren't so uptight. Maybe we could be good friends. Or work together. They seem like a good person. They look like they've been through a lot though. They're so guarded. Aren't they hiding something? Are they really as they appear? I don't know if I can trust them. They're so strong. Even in the face of adversity, they stay true to themselves and kind to others. I admire them for that. It could be so easy to resent or hate people but this person is so genuine. They keep giving though people hurt them. I hope they can protect themselves and stand up for themselves. They don't deserve the hate they get."
Okay for some of you this person knows you from work or school. There are people around you that try to control you or bring you down. Especially, jealous people that want to give you a bad reputation because you don't follow their tracks. This could be true especially if you have a different vision of how work should be done or how people should be treated. They envy your energy and the attention you get. This person you're asking about has good intentions and a good opinion of you but they're confused as to why other people don't seem to see you like they do. They also have a hard time figuring you out. You impress them as much as you scare them. They could be your coworker or maybe a patron that frequently comes to your workplace and has seen your evolution. For others this can be a friend of yours or a family member. I don't get romantic feelings from this group but rather platonic ones. Now it doesn't mean that their opinion and feelings can't change/evolve. This person specifically admires your professional attitude, your strength and resilience. They admire your giving nature and your tendency to give people a chance instead of judging them at first sight.
Their actions - 10 of swords, 6 of pentacles, 4 of swords, knight of wands, Wheel of fortune, ace of pentacles
If this person may have appeared as cold and distant towards you at first, they got warmer as they got to know you and observe you. They like to watch you from a distance. They feel like they can have a more objective view of your essence if they're not involved directly. But at the end of the day, this person can't resist the pull. They had to get closer because they found your energy interesting. So at first, they would remain strictly professional. To the point where sometimes it would be as if they were a ghost. They would pretty much never interact unless it was really important. But most of the time they would remain hidden. But then the wheel turned because something made them take interest in you. Maybe it was something you did or something you said. For some I'm getting that they realised how important you were when you were gone. There was a period of time when you were the one that stopped communicating and it made them ponder about what you were up to and how you were doing. When you came back, this person started to act more friendly. They could have gotten you gifts or offered help, which they wouldn't have done before.
They acted differently for sure. More open to conversation, more present in your life, offering practical advice or helping you even before you asked. For some I'm getting the sense of someone leaving positive reviews or giving you extra cash, leaving littles notes on your desk to cheer you up. Trying to get the community around you to support you more by talking to other people about how nice of a person you are and changing the general opinion of you. For some this person would even take your defense in public without you being aware, trying to restore your honor. They feel more protective over you. Kind of like a surrogate dad or a mentor energy. When they got to see you, for some I'm getting the mental image of someone trying to uplift somebody else's spirit by shyly giving compliments in the disguise of a joke. Like for instance they would playfully comment your outfit but manage to tell you it looks good on you in the process. I felt the need to ask spirit for more information so I drew another card from the deck. You got The Star and The Devil. On the first card there's a female figure pouring water into a pond while she fondly looks at two cranes sitting nearby. There's a third crane in her back that she's not aware of. The other shows a feminine character with one blind eye and a mischievous look.
I'm getting several possibilities looking at this combination. One the one hand, it kinda confirms what I've been saying about this person protecting you and acting behind your back. As the Star card can be related to the Internet and the Devil card can represent naysayers/people with bad intentions, it shows that this person has been defending you online. I'm getting a scenario where a group of people is having a private conversation on any social platform where they talk baldly about you or make fun of you. And either this person has been calling these people out or they went as far as to threaten them of filing a complaint in your name. On the other hand, these two cards could be showing that this person is two faced. They may act kind and sweet in front of your face, but talk badly about you behind your back. Or, if they're not dissing you, at least they're playing the game to get favors out of you. For instance, they could be complimenting you a lot, hoping you'd forget something they did or said about you that hurt you.
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bunny584 · 9 months ago
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OBSESSED: GETO (PT. II)
A/N: I…guys this one is…dirty. For so many reasons. I don’t. I can’t look myself in the eye. Suguru made me do it 😅
C/W: Voyeurism, Mature themes, 18+ (Part I here)
Music inspo: This is SO Chase Atlantic coded
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Acceptance.
They say the first step to recovery from addiction is acceptance.
Fine, then.
Suguru Geto’s addiction to you is absolute. And he has no interest in recovery.
He’s accepted it. You own him.
Granted, he didn’t realize just how tight your leash is. Not until last night.
Suguru is a logical, reasonable, creature of habit. He doesn’t need much. Really, he doesn’t.
But fucking you to sleep nightly is non-negotiable.
Or rather, fucking his hand. While watching you watch TV. And swirl a glass of Pinot noir in your gorgeous mouth. With your graceful fingers mindlessly swimming in a bowl of popcorn.
Extra butter. With tons and TONS of salt!
The first time you ordered your side snack at the movie theatre, Suguru almost keeled over.
But then he made the glorious mistake of flickering over to you, mid movie. Just as your index finger slid between those pillow soft lips. Pulling remnants of salt and butter away, leaving a trail of lip gloss behind.
He could’ve sucked it off your finger right there and then.
The way you pistoned in and out of your mouth. Doe-eyed and trained on the screen. Not a thought in your head. It was his gateway drug.
The butterfly effect.
A moment in time that rerouted fate.
His excruciatingly beautiful, platonic best friend, now a visceral need.
And just like any addiction. There were stages.
Denial: He doesn’t see you that way. No, of course not. His mind just got caught in a horny spiral. He’ll snap out of it. Things will go back to normal.
Anger: How could you do this to him? You know how disorienting you are. That smile. Always looking up at him with puppy eyes and parted lips. You’re a cocktease. Begging. Pleading. Needing him to debase you to nothing. Is that it? You want him to ruin you, don’t you? And he could. Fuck you into next week. Until you’re screaming and crying. He’d smear those tears all over his cock and fuck them back into your pouty mouth. It’s what you deserve.
Shame: It’s perverse. You call to vent about your day. He rubs himself raw while you talk. You kiss his cheek. His dick leaks. How could he do this to someone who trusts him like you do?
It was a vicious, muddled cycle. He could barely function around you.
Rushed greetings. Kurt words. Clipped responses. Avoidance.
He had to protect you from his depraved thoughts. Shield you from sordid actions taken in the dark — as if they would spontaneously materialize in the light to harm you.
And they did. But in the opposite way Suguru intended.
“Hey, HEY! Suguru, what the hell is up with you?”
You squeezed his wrist with all your might. It felt like nothing. But the weight in your tone hit him like a freight train.
“What are you talking about?”
“You’ve been distant."
“I’ve been right here.”
“You’ve been distant, Suguru.”
Quartz showers streamed down your beautiful face and his cock quivered. Drooling along his thigh. So. Fucking. Pretty when you cry.
Did you know?
How irresistible you looked?
Glassy eyes. Trembling lips. Vulnerable. Soft enough to hunt.
Did you know?
How he clawed his palm bloody to keep from gripping your neck. Shoving you to your knees. And giving you a reason to whine his name like that again.
“Why won’t you just talk to me?”
“I have to go—“
“I don’t care!”
“Wha—“
“I don’t care!! I don’t care what it is okay? I just…I miss..I miss my best friend.”
You elevated off your heels. No where near eye level, but enough to cradle his face in your dainty hands.
And God dammit. He might as well have been wearing a dog tag with your name on it.
If lost, return to Owner.
Between your misty eyes. Swollen lips. Face like a canvas to paint with his cum. He bit back a pathetic groan. And choked out an apology.
Most importantly, he made a promise to never hollow out your friendship like that again.
So, instead he fills it. With ropes of his arousal. And fuck, it’s rhapsody.
The stages. The anger, disbelief, shame…it was worth it. Because this ecstasy? It’s sublime.
Constant ascension. Never once reaching cruising altitude.
…which made the fall agonizing.
Last night, in a sick, twisted turn of fate - his camera feed cut off.
One minute Suguru is pumping into his abused rubber cocksleeve. Sliding his eyes up and down your hips until he was dizzy in the head. Pre cum squelching out of the little space between his cock and the ring of his 5th battered toy. Unintelligible praises leaking out of him, cementing his devotion. And just as the curtains began to fall on his vision. Balls heavy and hot with his seed—
Then he saw nothing.
Suguru couldn’t recognize the man in his room last night. Fingers aching. Mind racing. Dick red, angry, pulsating for its one and only vice.
Alarm bells rang between his ears. Crash landing into an abyss. Mayday.
Mayday.
In that moment. He knew he needed more. More skin. More angles. More you.
And so, he’s standing outside your Pilates studio @ 7:28 PM. Two minutes until you’re done.
A Dragonfruit smoothie rests in his hand.
And a new camera system rests in his back pocket.
———
“Ugh, I needed that.”
You sling a cold eucalyptus towel around your neck.
“And I need him.” The comment emanates from one of your girlfriends. Both of you rounding the corner out of the studio.
Suguru.
You don’t have to look out the glass windows to know exactly who she is referring to.
“I mean, seriously. How can you not climb him like a—“
“Stop it!!” Your protest made less believable because of your sheepish giggles.
“We’re just friends.” You mutter. Pulling your gym bag out of the front lockers.
Yeah, who are you trying to convince? Her? Or yourself?
Your eyes flicker to your platonic, gorgeous best friend. Raven mane in a glossy, high ponytail. Freely cascading down his back. Curly wisps framing his razor sharp angles.
He stands tall. So Muscular. Quietly masculine. Despite how dreamy his hair is.
“Omg! Your hair!! Whats your routine?” - every woman who meets him, ever.
“Genetics.”
Suguru responds the same way every time with a dimpled smile. The other party is always immediately caught in his web.
His eyes. They lure you in like quicksand. Onyx. Swarming with grey and violet specks. Stormy. Perpetually faraway.
He’s the perfect gentleman. But always a little bit above it all. Just out of reach.
It’s mesmerizing.
You can’t blame the women for trying any and everything for a tiny piece.
Suguru catches your gaze. Silky smile pulls across his lips. He beckons you with one swirl of the liquid gold in his hands.
“What are you doing here, pretty boy?”
“Happy to see you too.” He counters with a low chuckle.
You coax the sweet treat away from him. It’s precisely what you need.
Suguru always has his pulse on you. Somehow he knows where to be and when. Every time.
“Mmm” your eyes flutter shut. Savoring the sickly sweet, cold mush on your tongue.
“Exactly what you wanted?”
“Exactly. Have I told you I love you lately?”
“Not nearly enough.” His baritone hovers over you. Traveling down your spine at light speed.
Has he always sounded this sultry?
You lazily pull yourself out of the sugar-induced dopamine hit.
Suguru moves into you like a storm cloud. Accentuating the comical difference in stature. The world around you slowly dissipates.
Lost in the desert mirage of his gaze. Everything feels conscious.
Your shallow breathing. The thrum of blood surging through your vessels. Heart rattling against its bony cage.
Time stops.
Then it happens all at once.
Before you know what is happening, your best friend’s well built arm is around your waist. His large, veiny hand palming the nape of your neck.
His lips. His plump rosy lips are on yours. Sweet and warm. Pulling, pushing, melding with you into play dough.
He’s delicious.
More delectable than you knew possible.
“Mmmgh” You moan and Suguru takes the space to push his tongue into your mouth. He’s blinding. Expertly tickling the ridges and corners of your mouth. As if to show off just how skilled he is with his tongue.
“S-Suguru..”
He pulls away far before you’re ready. Shocking you out of your lusty daze. For a moment he just rests his moist lips on yours. Exchanging breaths between each other. As if only you two are the source of oxygen around you.
“Wha…what was..”
“There’s a guy burning a crater into your back.” He finally responds. Gruff. Strained. You’ve never seen him without a tight leash around his self-command.
“I didn’t want him thinking he has a chance.”
And just like that, the familiar tame control lines his velvet baritone.
Suguru places a chaste kiss on your cheek before starting to walk in the direction of your apartment. As if the world didn’t just tilt on its axis.
You’re able to maintain a fairly normal conversation with your best friend the entire walk back to your apartment. You both laugh and joke as if he didn’t just fuck your mouth with his tongue. And as if you didn’t feel drunk off of it.
You’re just friends.
…right?
You toss your keys somewhere to your left. In the periphery you see Suguru smile and shake his head. Well aware of your messy tendencies. He leans down to take your keys and place them on the door hook.
The devil on your shoulder is deafening.
Test it.
Test him.
Your hand moves before your mind.
Your fingers hook under your sports bra. Pulling it over your head in one smooth motion. Before your mounds bounce in full view, your arm cups them against your chest.
You turn to Suguru, now topless.
“Gonna hop in the shower for a little. Are you staying for dinner?” Willing your voice to be steady and light. A casual question amidst the mayhem in your mind.
And, as expected, Suguru is the perfect gentleman.
His olive tone is even. Hands slotting into his athletic pants. Faint smile tracing on his lips, dimple apparent in his left cheek.
His eyes don’t falter below your neckline. Not even for a moment.
“Not tonight, pretty. There’s a show I want to catch. Rain check?”
Of course, you’re just friends.
Best friends.
You flash him a genuine smile. Swallowing the nagging flecks of dissappointnent beginning to weave itself within you.
“Rain check!”
And maybe 10 or so minutes after soaking in your steamy shower. Trying to wash the remnants of his kiss out of your memory, you hear your door slamming shut.
You make a mental note to ask about what show he was referring to.
———
Whiskey glides hot and cold down Suguru’s throat.
Back flushed against his desk chair.
Patiently awaiting his 10:00 PM viewing.
His dick is a steel rod. Blushing and moist. Draped in a pair of your used panties. He swiped them on his way out of your apartment.
Suguru drags his palm lazily up and down his shaft. Soaking your lingerie in beads of pre cum. It’s like he’s feeling you rubbing your plush cunt up and down his rod.
Fog is settling opaque in his mind. While he pets the flame stirring between his legs.
You haven’t even come into frame yet. But Suguru admires the pristine view he has of your room. Porcelain duvet messily strewn about. Half open night stand. Magenta vibrator propped against the corner of your drawer.
How often do you touch yourself?
What do you think about?
How pretty do you sound? When you milk pleasure from your dewy core?
“Fuck,” Suguru hisses.
He brings the whiskey glass back to his parted lips. The thought of seeing you work yourself to a peak drove his hand up and down his cock too fast. If he’s not careful he’ll cum before he’s ready.
No.
Not tonight.
Tonight he wants to savor his relapse.
24 hours sober of you was unbearable. He deserves this indulgence.
Suguru tilts his chin up. Damp hair feathering his shoulders and back feels refreshingly cool against the lava circulating beneath his skin.
“You like teasing me don’t you?” He murmurs, slowly pumping his cock through his strained grip.
The way you pulled off your sports bra. Well before you reached your bathroom door. Pretty bedroom eyes raking his face. Testing him. You knew he would go home and feverishly fuck his fist for you. Didn’t you?
A siren’s melody pulls his hazy, dazed attention back to screen.
“There she is.”
Suguru leans closer to his screens. Giving himself kudos for choosing a camera system with audiovisual integration this time around.
You step in full view of his camera and his body stills. Completely statuesque. Mouth ajar. His cock drool dribbling down his stiff hand is the only source of movement in the room.
“Fuck…fucking hell.”
There you stood. Thong as richly colored as the wine in your glass. Accentuating the dramatic dip and swell of your pretty waist and hips. The wavy lines from your slender shoulders to your full tits are enough to make him seasick. Your nipples are so hard. Puffier than he imagined.
You are immaculate.
A divine being. Heaven’s incarnate.
And even if you weren’t. Even if you were the devil. He’d follow you to the depth of hell.
A thick surge of pre cum flicking back against his lower abs pulls him briefly out of his trance. Suguru didn’t realize how hard he was strangling his length. Which is violently jerking in haphazard directions.
Begging for its real owner.
Suguru drags in a deep breath. Reluctantly unraveling his needy hand away from his manhood. Another sip of icy brown liquor.
Savor this.
As if your souls are tied, you take a sip of red wine before settling in your bed. Back against your head board. Feet planted on your plush duvet. You let your knees fall to the side and Suguru nearly drools on himself.
A blooming rose.
Presenting your swollen, misty petals to him for worship. His eyes drop to your core. A thin line of fabric laid so perfectly between your folds.
Suguru has to remind himself that you aren’t in front of him.
And he can’t just dive into your dewy cunt. And nuzzle against your bud. And lap up the honey in between your folds.
You rest your head against the wall. Exposing the delicate lines of your neck. His left hand magnets back to his cock. His right hits the record function on the screen.
You are too special not to capture.
But, even if he couldn’t record you on this system, every moment right now is etched into his mind for an eternity.
Especially the way your dainty fingers travel down your chest, along your torso, beneath the hem of your panties and settle over your clit.
“That’s it, princess.” Suguru chants beneath his clipped breaths. Dragging your soaked underwear along his messy shaft.
He matches his pace to your tiny circles. Small, gorgeous pants tumble out of you.
Your other hand palms at your tits. Pinching and pulling at your pert nipples. Your hips buck at the sweet pleasure and pain.
“Good girl”
His arousal continues to collect at his base, trickling to his inner thighs. The sound of his hilt slamming into his hand fill the room.
“God. S..Suguru…”
His name thunders between his ears.
His name wrapped in that melodic, lusty falsetto of yours.
Suguru’s brain can barely register the way your tits bounce in rhythm with your hands. Pistoning your fingers in and out of your sweet cunt. Ascending to euphoria. He can barely register the way your lips are swollen and abused from your teeth. Or the light sheen of sweat along your collarbones.
“Fuck, Suguru please..” you moan. Both hands now working your flower.
Suguru is slack jawed. Completely short circuited. He cannot move.
Unblinking, he studies you. Hands at his side. Cock spearing high in the air, leaking.
His mind is flooded with the thin, featherlight moans and whines. Sticky arousal leaks from your needy opening around your fingers. Coating your inner thighs. How you twist and groan away from your own pleasure - so clearly overstimulated but not stopping your fingers, anyway.
“Say my name, pretty girl. Say my name.” Suguru rasps out. Sharp pain lightening through him from the dryness in his throat.
And you do. You moan his name when you reach nirvana. Heaving and whining and squirming in your mess. You called for him.
“God, I’m disgusting.”
You laugh through the remnants of your high and bury yourself under the duvet. Lazily tapping the bedside lamp. Bringing Suguru’s private viewing to an end.
And his smile is vulturous.
Suguru’s hand runs the length of his insatiable cock. Slow, lazy strokes. Haphazard twitches pushing out globs of cum. Begging for an encore.
You think you’re disgusting?
Ohhh, sweet girl.
You don’t know the half of it.
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suiana · 8 months ago
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Yay!
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(yandere! sweetheart x gn! reader)
You've seen him around. Seen how he talks, how he acts. And you're certain of one thing.
He's not what he looks to be.
Others might say you're paranoid or something, say you're just jealous of him and how everyone seems to adore him. But you really aren't. You just... You're just scared of him.
You're sure of it. It's his whole vibe and aura. It fucking creeps you out and you just can't understand why no one else can feel that. But you suppose it's because he looks like just another guy who's awfully sweet.
His eyes, lips, they all tell a different story as compared to the eerie vibe he gives off. Normally the eyes would be able to tell if he was just acting but... Even his eyes show that he's just a sweetheart.
You've rethought your opinions on him several times. Maybe you're just mistaken. Perhaps you're thinking too much about it.
But no matter how hard you've tried to see him in a positive light, your stomach churns with an indescribable fear. And your gut has never once lied to you.
Which is why you're currently trying to leave this scary situation which your best friend has put you in. She had brought you out to eat for a hangout and out of nowhere, this guy popped out and your friend invited him to join you two without caring about your opinion. You really wanted to punt her after she did that.
Anyways, she's in the toilet right now which means that you're left alone with him.
You didn't know what to say. You honestly just wanted to avoid him if you could. But he seemed to have other ideas.
"So! What have you been up to? I've been volunteering and helping around town, planting flowers and accompanying old granny-"
You tune out his words, staring at him with a slightly unnerved expression. Shit, he really does look like your average cute guy who's just a sweetheart. You can't help but feel bad about ignoring him but... even now, you're on edge. How could this be? You don't even sense any malicious intent but you're worried?
"Hey! Are you not listening?"
You snap out of your daze, blinking several times as you gulp nervously.
"Ah... apologies. I was just... tired, yeah."
"Hm..."
He hums, still smiling at you as he props his hands on the table and rests his chin on them. You figut the urge to look away from him as he stares holes into your skull. Shit, when is your friend going to return? You can't handle this anymore...
"Say, darling, do I scare you that much?"
He suddenly mumbles, catching you off guard by the petname and his words. What? He knew that he scared you?
"I knew that you were different. That you could see something others couldn't. Which is why I was interested in the first place. But it really hurts me to see you blatantly ignoring me more and more each day."
He complains, pouting at you as he continues to stare straight into your soul. You feel a shiver run down your spine as your mouth runs dry. Wait what? What is going on? Why did he say that? He knew? Darling? Did he like you?! What the hell?
"You're really special to me. I really don't want you to be scared of me."
He reaches one of his hands out and places it above your trembling ones. He smiles warmly, though you can't help but feel chilled by the action. Damn boy! Stop! You don't like this!
"W-what are you-"
"I am completely in love with you. And I apologize about my... condition that has scared you."
He admits, cheeks flushed as he continues to stare at you, eyes unblinking. You have no response to him. Who knew that the town sweetheart that scared the shit out of you had fallen for you? And condition? Oh shit, was he like, a devil or something?
You gulp nervously, lower lip trembling as you freeze in your seat. Cold sweat decorates your forehead as you pray for your friend to hurry her ass up.
"Ah... I had planned to just take you, you know? But I don't want you to be too frightened of me... It hurts. Truly."
He sighs before removing his hand away from yours, looking at the direction in which your friend was walking from. Thank god! What was she even doing for so long?! She was gone for five full minutes, damn!
"Your friend is back, let's cheer up a bit, hm?"
He chuckles lightly, stirring his coffee as he finally breaks the prolonged eye contact which made you feel naked. Whew, finally that was over. You felt molested by him even though all he did was say some creepy shit.
But... condition. Hm... You'd need to do more research about him. Maybe then you could finally understand why you felt so unnderved by this guy.
And perhaps even try to get rid of the constant stress in your mind. Which would be him, obviously.
He seemed to know so much about you yet you know almost nothing about him. This was really not an optimal position for you.
"Haha! Did you see a ghost or something? You look scared as shit!"
Your friend jokes, taking her seat beside you as she goes back to eating her cake.
Yeah, she was right. You did just see a ghost. And this ghost was sitting right at the table together with you two.
Damn it, this was really the worst.
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animeyanderelover · 1 year ago
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Since you're starting JJK, can you do the sleeping with a yandere ask for Yuuji, Sukuna, Megumi, Nanami, Gojo and characters of your choice?
I’ll be going on a vacation during my holidays so expect little to no updates from me then. Those sleeping habits that are what I imagine those characters to be like, by the way.
Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy relationship, toxic relationship, obsession, possessive behavior, delusion, clinginess, abduction
Sleeping with a Yandere
Itadori Yuji
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🩷​Yuji is a walking cuddle bear already if you two aren't sleeping in the same bed because he just can't get enough of his sweetheart. An abduction is never something that Yuji sees himself doing nor do you really so with the so unexpected abduction your relationship falls apart and it breaks Yuji's heart. Maybe some part of his brain can understand why you're as upset as you are right now but considering that he only resorts to an abduction in extreme situations, another part of him is just as stubborn to believe that he has done only something to be able to protect you. It isn't like he plans to imprison you forever after all. His delusions have even made him hope that you'd want to share a bed with him yet he resigns himself to your rejection and prepares a futon for you in another room.
🩷​One of the most obvious problems with Yuji isn't even something that is his own fault. Sukuna has to make some comments from time to time to try to annoy and anger the boy which might happen whilst both of you try to sleep as well. He always slaps the mouth of Sukuna that suddenly appears and apologizes to you slightly embarrassed about the inconvenience. Otherwise Yuji sleeps well, really well. Maybe sometimes a bit too well as you can't help but wonder how you can get him to wake up when you awake in the middle of the night and feel the urgent need to go to the bathroom. It always takes you a minute or two of shaking, light slapping and whispering his name until he wakes up and lets you out of his arms because his grip is too strong for you to free yourself alone. He snores slightly but that isn't the worst, you'd much rather make a fuss about the fact that he tends to drool on you in his sleep.
Fushiguro Megumi
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💙​As Megumi's darling you'd do the both of you a favor by being a reassuring individual since the Jujutsu Sorcerer tends to be very easily paranoid. He's had a case of being stressed around people before yet now with your addition to his life, this all becomes just multiple times worse. Ultimately it is this paranoia that drives him to the act of an abduction and similar to Yuji, he partially knows why it would scare you. Yet he has never had problems with justifying questionable actions with his love for you in mind so this won't be any different in this scenario. Why don't you understand that this was all done for your safety?? A strong negative response from your side leads to avoidance as he gives you time, gives himself partially time too to calm himself. Both of you sleep in different rooms during that time, although you know that he still keeps an eye on you.
💙​He doesn't want to show a very strong response when both of you start sharing a bed, it isn't his style. He would be lying though if he would say that he isn't looking forward to it. It's one of the highlights of his entire day where he has to exhaust himself with the antics of his fellow Jujutsu Sorcerers and pressure from the Zenin clan so spending the hours of the night with your warmth close to his body always reminds him that there's still something good left for him, a person who makes all the drama durable. I see him as someone who needs hours to fall asleep simply because there's so much going on in his mind and often it happens that Megumi goes through interactions you had with people that day and start overthinking certain gestures and words you exchanged with them. He isn't someone with a deep sleep either and worst of all is that he tends to wake up a lot at night, his gaze always searching for you every time that happens and if he doesn't see you, he tends to freak out a bit.
Zenin Maki
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💚​If her darling is acting like a crybaby after their abduction, there might be signs of very mild annoyance from Maki's side but otherwise she is very patient. She fully understand why you're upset and mad at her, she's aware of what she has done. The aspect of protection dulls potential guilt though as she will always value your safety and life over your own feelings if there is no other way around it. She's so tough and strict but oddly fair at the same time because her cold facade doesn't mean that she just doesn't care at all. She's willing to give you some space and time for yourself as she's sure that you need it and as long as you don't try to escape or are seriously rude, she won't force you into anything. You get your own room with your own bed to sleep in and won't hear much from her for the next few days, although you know that she's still checking on you.
💚​She is looking forward to it but don't expect her to openly admit that. She isn't one to ask you first about this and if you're the one to suggest it first, she will never spot teasing you subtly about it for the rest of your life. She does her best though to suppress the smug grin that wants to appear on her face during the first few nights. She isn't actively cuddling you but you definitely have a problem at hand when she decides to swing an arm around your waist because subconsciously she tightens her grip once she falls asleep and since she has a very superior strength to the average human, you won't get up anytime soon unless you wake her up. She normally is able to sleep quite well but when she's stressed she experiences troubles falling asleep or tends to wake up multiple times at night. Normally she acts all tough and rarely talks to you about her own worries but if you ever witness her having an erratic sleep at night, you always know that there's something that is stressing her out.
Ryomen Sukuna
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🗾His darling is screwed no matter how you might look at it, especially if they're only a human. Because this man has made it very apparent that he doesn't care for anyone or anything and even you won't be an exception for this. Sukuna has always been a man who takes what he wants and that applies for you just as much. You're an object of his affection and greedy desire, by all means he sees you as his valued possession more than he sees you as a person with feelings and rights. So you can't expect any sympathy from him after your abduction and you'd do your best to not get on his nerves because he can hurt you and he will do so if he feels like it. Sukuna only does what he wants and the only thing you can really do is take it silently in hopes of not angering him but he'd find it cute if you would always show a little bit of fear around him.
🗾​I'm not even sure if he needs any sleep anymore since his times as a human are long over although he has kept his memories from that time so he still remembers that humans need sleep. Although what you need doesn't have to mean by a long shot that he'll just give it to you freely. In fact I totally see him terrorizing your sleep sometimes for the shallow reason of his own sadistic amusement. Other times he only allows you to fall asleep if you let him join you in bed and he'll keep you otherwise awake nights on end until you're too tired to care anymore. You're incredibly dumb for letting him so close to you in your most vulnerable state and the times that he has considered abusing that vulnerability are numerous. Honestly, he's being the ultimate creep by just watching you sleep the entire time, hands roaming over your body to feel what is his but if he's feeling rather relaxed and mellow, he sometimes just buries his face in your neck, closes his eyes and enjoys your scent, your warmth, your heartbeat.
Gojo Satoru
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🩵​Best of luck with Gojo after an abduction, better say goodbye to your privacy and personal boundaries because Gojo? He just doesn't give a single fuck about any of those. No, somehow he grows even more overbearing after you're permanently stuck in the probably biggest house that you've ever been in. Partially just because he feels like he has now his dream of living a peaceful and domestic life with his sweet lover without any stress from higher-ups or anyone objecting to this relationship. Now he can just love you and keep you for himself. It's a very strange and questionable way of fulfilling his dream but he is at a point in his life where he has given up to feel guilty and doesn't care anymore. He's always been the strongest to satisfy his own clan and the higher-ups of the sorcerer world so he deserves someone for himself. Someone for him and him only.
🩵​He's a clingy monster and you should already know this as he has barely kept his hands to himself during the entire time since you've known him and that has only grown worse the stronger his obsession got. There is no question, you are going to sleep with him in one bed from the moment you are imprisoned in your new home with him. He isn't even listening to your protests and complains and you'd better not provoke him unless you want to see him dropping his light-hearted facade. Seeing him asleep disturbs you but not because of his clingy behavior and tight hug he always gives you nor his surprisingly deep sleep but because he looks so terribly vulnerable. White hair covering his eyes, soft breaths escaping his lips and no teasing expression adorning his face. It's even worse when he initially wakes up and blue and sleepy eyes stare at you as he whispers, no, pleads you to never leave him. It breaks your heart a little.
Geto Suguru
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🗻​​Suguru has broken your trust severely when you realize what he has been doing all along, abusing your trust and ignorance to his own advantage until you made him your most trusted person and told him all of your thoughts. Now you're here, imprisoned and surrounded by jujutsu sorcerers who share his views. You're a lesser being in here for being a non-sorcerer and you know that secretly most of the people here look down on you but only show some level of respect because you're Geto's precious love or whatever he's feeling for you. No one tells you what's really going on but you are smart enough to understand that those people possess very special powers and that something is always watching you even when you're all by yourself. So you never misbehave, aware what would happen otherwise.
🗻​He isn't over the fact that he's fallen in love with what he hates the most even after an abduction so you are sleeping elsewhere. A tiny room with a futon as if to rub your lesser position in your face but truth be told, he's doing this mainly because he secretly wants your warmth next to him at night. He's just trying to reject his desires as he doesn't want to fall too deeply into his infatuation but it's already too late to turn back and perhaps you're more surprised than anyone when one day he tells you you'll share a bed with him from now on. You even vocalize your confusion but shut up when he throws you a sharp glare, silencing you as he himself doesn't want to answer your question. Vocalizing his needs would only make it harder to brush off as something less after all. Geto doesn't want to show too much affection but subconsciously he always fails as his half-awake form always pulls you closer to his body, always desires to feel your warm body safely held against his own as his long hair tickles your neck and face.
Nanami Kento
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💛​Here we have a man who is trying to be his most respectful to you after an abduction that he has been planning for a longer time now after a triggering accident, most likely something regarding his very protective feelings. He isn't scolding you for being scared and even lets you insult him all you want with a frightening calm expression on his face, only really stopping you if you try to escape, hurt him or yourself in which case you see his face flashing in anger and slight frustration as you realize how scary he can be if he chooses to be. He gives you space as much as he can but even then his presence is felt throughout your entire new life as you realize that Nanami apparently enjoys taking care of you to the point where he's being controlling with it. There's a certain schedule to your life now, one that he has prepared specifically for you.
💛​This even includes your bedtime as you have to be at a certain hour in bed and get enough sleep and have to get up at a certain time in the morning. Nanami isn't forcing you to share a bed with him though as he graciously prepares another room for you to stay and sleep in. So it's a decision based on consens after your abduction to sleep with him and he's another case of showing his emotions in a very controlled way whilst being deep down just relieved that the worst phrase of the abduction seems to be over now. His sleeping schedule is just as meticulous though so both of you go to the bed at the same time and stand up in the morning at the same time. Nanami is also another candidate who needs a bit longer until he falls asleep because he's also thinking a lot when he lies in bed and only silence surrounds him. He has always an arm wrapped around you but the grip isn't too tight for you to not be able to free yourself if you should ever feel the need to visit the toilet. He is a bit more of a sensitive sleeper though so try to be quiet if you don't want to wake him up.
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