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kissoflightning · 2 days ago
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Master-List of Active Detroit: Become Human Writers On Tumblr
(Updated November 22, 2024)
[Update includes the addition of some new names & AO3 but unfortunately the hyperlink is capped, so I still dropped their pseuds and regular links in the list!]
[Colors to indicate my reader checklist have been scrapped; Tumblr tag colors do not show up on mobile, so I have highlighted the AO3 names with the applicable colors.]
New to writing fiction for the fandom, or your name isn't on the list? Comment/Reblog and I will add your name to this post! Note that I am adding writers with fics already up on AO3/Wattpad only, but I will continue to add more as we grow!
Apologies for mass tagging people, but I wanted there to be a list of active DBH Fanfiction writers to make it easier to find each other on here! LINKS TO fanfic source and Tumblr are included!
I also would like readers to take note that EVERY WRITER that I post here will appreciate positive comments on their fic! Even if it's just a heart, emoji, "I enjoyed it", or "Second Kudos", it will MAKE THEIR DAY! Please comment on fics that you enjoyed no matter hold old they are!
Also stats such as Hits, Kudos, or the fact that I have read the fic is in no way a reflection of the quality of the fic! I will put the writers in alphabetical order based on their Tumblr name for organizational purposes!
Also if you wish to be taken off this list, just shoot me a DM and I will do so. It is so awesome that there are not only so many active DBH writers but also - if you made it to this list, that means you haven't blocked me yet, so Kudos to you for that! :D
[Update pending: Will add relationship/family/character tags in a future update on December 5th, 2024. (You can also feel free to comment your fave ship to write about in the replies) Sorry this is just a list of names with any distinguishing of category, but this already took so long, you will just have to try your luck! Please notify if one of or more of the links is wrong/broken; Tumblr has a limit on hyperlinks unfortunately, so for some I had to just drop their pseuds.
Color coding:
Recent - Updated within the past 3 months
Active - Writing for the Fandom (Updated within the last 13 months)
Hiatus - Updated over 13 months ago/Leaving Fandom
??? - 2+ Years Since Last Update/ No Longer Writing for the Fandom, but still replies to comments!!!
[Sometimes I'll mix colors 'cause they wrote recently but are leaving the fandom or something]
[Example of my color system would be:
@kissoflightning because this writer has posted a DBH fic in November, 2024]
Okay, brace yourself for a LONG LIST below the cut!
# - C
Tumblr: @8-rae-rae-8
AO3: emogoose
Tumblr: @a-feral-coffee-enthusiast AO3: Unfortunately_sentient
Tumblr: @aghostinmyownmachine @scribeofred @thewritinggrindstone
AO3: scribeOfRED
Tumblr: @alecthewreck AO3: AlecTheWreck
Tumblr: @andthekitchensinkao3 AO3: andthekitchensink
Tumblr: @angelgirl768 AO3: angelgirl768
Tumblr: @anonymousedward AO3: anonymousEDward
Tumblr: @autiacorart AO3: Autiacora
Tumblr: @archadianskies
AO3: Archaidian_Skies
Tumblr: @astrahannah AO3: AstraHannah
Tumblr: @average-mako-enjoyer
AO3: AverageMakoEnjoyer
Tumblr: @aydaptic AO3: Aydaptic (Fic & Webcomic)
Tumblr: @brokskar AO3: brokskar
Tumblr: @calamity-jc AO3: Calamity_JC
Tumblr: @chaos-thirium AO3: chaos_thirium
Tumblr: @connor-rk800 AO3: thespacebetweenstars
Tumblr: @connor-sent-by-cyberlife @timebird84
AO3: Connor sent by Cyberlife (Timebird84)
Tumblr: @connorboyyy AO3: hereforthegayy
Tumblr: @connorsjorts AO3: connorsjorts
Tumblr: @cptjh-arts (Fic Art) AO3: cptJH
Tumblr: @cryptidblossomd AO3: C0nt0l_cha0s
Tumblr: @changethecircumstances AO3: ChangeTheCircumstances
D-K
Tumblr: @detroitbecomeonline
AO3: TrinityOnline
Tumblr: @discodeviant AO3: DiscoDeviant
Tumblr: @einradi AO3: Einradi
Tumblr: @illegalvampire Wattpad: vampyrl0ser AO3: vampyrl0ser (TBD)
Tumblr: @incomprehensible-phasmid AO3: IncomprehensiblePhasmid
Tumblr: @insignova AO3: Insignova
Tumblr: @fadedflame
AO3: FadedFlame
Tumblr: @fizzlefudge AO3: FizzleFudge
Tumblr: @fumikosushi AO3: FumikoSushi
Tumblr: @gauzyfruitcake AO3: beeayy
Tumblr: @gavinisqueer @listeningboy AO3: ListeningBoy
Tumblr: @gildedfrost-ao3 AO3: GildedFrost
Tumblr: @glxyqst AO3: GLXYQST
Tumblr: @hauntedoneao3 AO3: HauntedOne
Tumblr: @headfulloffantasy
AO3: HeadFullOfFantasy
Tumblr: @hemlockdumpling AO3: Hemlock_Dumpling
Tumblr: @hothotpot
AO3: hothotpot (https://archiveofourown.org/users/hothotpot/pseuds/hothotpot/works?fandom_id=23172234)
Tumblr: @katlakitty AO3: katlakitty
Tumblr: @kamari2038 AO3: kamari2038
Tumblr: @karasgotagun @jazzmckay AO3: karasgotagun (jazzmckay)
Tumblr: @kissoflightning AO3: KissOfLightning
Tumblr: @konami-code-ao3 @alcatrazoutpatient AO3: AlcatrazOutpatient
L-N
Tumblr: @l1av AO3: L1av
Tumblr: @ladydrace
AO3: LadyDrace
Tumblr: @leelany-world AO3: Leelany
Tumblr: @lethotep
AO3: Lethotep
Tumblr: @lilaccadenza AO3: LilacCadenza
Tumblr: @littlehaize AO3: haize
Tumblr: @litoperezito (Webcomic) AO3: LitoPerezito
Tumblr: @lugiadepression
AO3: LugiaDepression
Tumblr: @mangabirdao3 AO3: Manga_bird Wattpad: Manga_bird
Tumblr: @mercilessflowchart AO3: Mercilessflowchart
Tumblr: @moonlitmilo AO3: MoonlitMilo
Tumblr: @mnictasbcl
AO3: mnictasbcl
Tumblr: @my-name-is-markus-with-a-k @unlisshed AO3: Unlisshed
Tumblr: @nartes
AO3: nartes
Tumblr: @negative-citadel AO3: Negative_Citadel
Tumblr: @nock-and-bolt
AO3: Nock_and_Bolt
Tumblr: @nothinggathers AO3: AtropaAzraelle (Polyoxyethylene)
O- S
Tumblr: @peachymilkshakes
AO3: peachienne
Tumblr: @peskellence AO3: peskellence
Tumblr: @r-ate-9
AO3: Kangarooney
Tumblr: @qrjung AO3 : qrjung
Tumblr: @ranunculus-bloom
AO3: Queerapika
Tumblr: @pseudonymmcwriter AO3: PseudonymMcWriter
Tumblr: @rking200
AO3: rking200 (Mawific)
Tumblr: @rk800-is-hot-change-my-mind @spensual AO3: Spensual
Tumblr: @sevdrag
AO3: sevdrag (seventhe)
Tumblr: @shinyportalsandthings AO3: FancyPantsu
Tumblr: @simping-for-kamski AO3: TranscientNight
Tumblr: @sunwarmed-ash AO3: sunwarmed_ash
Tumblr: @sweeteatercat AO3: SweetEaterCat
Tumblr: @systemic-dreams AO3: systemic_dreams
T-Z
Tumblr: @temporary-enthusiasm AO3: TemporaryEnthusiasm
Tumblr: @the-ineffable-wanderer
AO3: KetchupOnToast
Tumblr: @thenookienostradamus AO3: nookienostradamus (https://archiveofourown.org/users/nookienostradamus/pseuds/nookienostradamus/works?fandom_id=23172234)
Tumblr: @titaniumpsychologist
AO3: TitaniumPsychologist (https://archiveofourown.org/users/TitaniumPsychologist )
Tumblr: @veilder AO3: Veilder
Tumblr: @wamblings AO3: ambling
Tumblr: @wyntereyez @wynterscribbles @wyntergamez AO3: wyntereyez
Tumblr: @yayen-chan AO3: yayenchan
Tumblr (Inactive) : @zeliannetascho (Will actively discuss HCs with you in the breakroomDMs Discord server) AO3: ZeliaTascho
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sapphiresaphics · 13 hours ago
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Here’s the thing. Arcane season 2 was finished being written back in 2020. It was completed before the first season of Arcane even aired on Netflix in the first place. Before they even knew if it was going to be a hit or not. Before any of the fans had hot takes about the characters.
Which means that all of these “new subplots” (such as the black rose) weren’t just added in on a whim. They have an intentional purpose in the story they’re trying to tell.
It also means that the pacing was always going to increase and become faster as the two seasons went on.
I think a lot of fans are coming at this show from the perspective of a lot of live action shows where the writers see how fans respond to certain things so they add them into the story or focus on fan favorites to grab your attention and keep you engaged. And live action shows can do this because they’re filmed relatively close to when the series airs and so they’re aware of what the reactions are on social media (for good or ill).
But this is animation. Very TIME CONSUMING animation at that. It took 4 years to finish animating the 9 episodes of Season 2. If you include the 6 years of development and production of Season 1, that’s almost a full DECADE of working on this show.
My point is that they literally (and logistically) can’t respond to fan input and make changes in the show based on the way it was received on social media. Like it or not, these specific characters beats and storylines were always the plan from the start.
This is a long winded way of trying to say… if you have problems with the way certain characters are behaving, or certain plot points feeling rushed, or feel overwhelmed by the number of added subplots that need to get resolved before the end of the show… I strongly suggest rather than saying the writing is “bad” or that the writers “don’t know what they’re doing” or just complain about anything really… I suggest you take a step back and ask yourself “why are these the stories and actions they chose for this 2 season arc?”
I think that’s a far more productive thing to do than to go online and whine about things you didn’t like. I find it’s better to try and understand WHY they chose to do these things rather than write them off. More often than not when you look into the why, or try to come up with reasons why the writers would take certain characters down the paths they do, you end up coming out appreciating the media more. Even if you still don’t were with their narrative choices, learning and understanding the WHY is far more rewarding I think.
I’ll give you an example of something I don’t like, but that I understand why. Isha. I don’t like that Isha was introduced and then killed off in the latest episode. If I were to look at it just from a surface level reading, it seems pointless to add this cute mute kid character only to take her away a few episodes later. But NARRATIVELY she’s extraordinarily important. She is what Jinx needed to become more empathetic to her sister and reach out to fix their family. She helps push Jinx into the role of Vander for season 2. And her heroically framed sacrifice is probably going to be the push Jinx needs to stop trying to commit suicide.
Would I have liked to see more of her and Jinx’s relationship? Yes. Would I liked to have learned more about where she came from and why she’s mute? Yes. But at the end of the day, this is not a show about Isha. Isha is a narrative device to help forward the character development of Jinx. And so, while I do not like that she sacrificed herself… I understand it. And that understanding helps me appreciate the writing and the level of depth the writers are willing to go to push their characters around where they need to be by the end of the series.
At the end of the day, Arcane is just another show on Netflix. It is not beyond criticism. There are a lot of legitimate criticisms you can have against the show. But I’ve found that recently the number of bad takes and people refusing to engage with the narrative has resulted in a bit of a backlash against the show and I do not think that’s ultimately very productive. Please… if you’re going to criticize the show, please try to do better than just write off anything you don’t like as “the writers just suck” or “they changed X character for no reason!”
Because I guarantee you, there IS a reason for everything in this show. No matter how small and trivial it might be, this show was put together with love and an extraordinary attention to detail. There are reasons for why characters do and say the things they say. The writers often make these into intentional parallels, foreshadowing, and callbacks.
Please… take the time to actually stop and dissect what you see. Even something upsets you. I implore you… try to understand why. Try to understand what the writers are saying. Try to understand how certain plot points and events could have a bearing on different characters.
Please just…. Try?
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sunnybunnyy2 · 12 hours ago
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My Ex-boyfriends New Girl
prologue
Tumblr media
chapter summary: the events that force your hand in your revenge scheme come to light as you find out the man who you have loved for the past three years isn't the man you needed him to be. 
word count: 4.1k
pairings: Rafe Cameron x ex!fem!reader, Sofia x fem!reader
warnings: angst, cheating, toxic relationship, asshole Rafe, swearing, not much Sofia :/ and probably bad writing.
authors note: hi!! This is the prologue to my new Sofia fic series. Tumblr has not been doing my girl justice so I decided to take matters into my own hands and write for her. I deeply apologize for any typos or any mistakes (mostly if I confuse second person and third because I am not used to writing in second). Please reach out of you want to be added to the taglist!!
series masterlist next chapter
"Wow...I can't believe you did all of this..." you said as you admired the beautifully set table in front of you. It was littered with plucked red roses and lit-up orange candles. It was perfect- well at least nearly perfect. As much as you appreciated the gesture, you couldn't help but be saddened that the only flower on the table was the one you couldn't stand. 
You felt as though they were overused and cliche, but it wasn't necessarily the flowers that downed your mood but the mere fact that you had told him countless times how much you loathed them and yet, once again he had stuffed them in your face.
It was as though he never heard a single word that came out of your mouth. It was okay, you supposed as at least he put the effort in, in the first place. 
"Of course, I would, baby. It's our three year, I would be stupid if I didn't." Rafe stated with a small smile, that was all he was willing to offer after the events of his father's death. You could tell it was weighing him down but you couldn't do more than you already were. 
You were skipping your classes, sleeping over every night, had arranged the funeral with him and been by his side every step of the way. You were exhausted but you knew he was going through the worst time of his life and was going through worse than you. That's what you kept telling yourself, that he needed comfort more than you did. That had calmed you down for the time being but it had been months and you knew that you were gonna snap one day soon, leading you to truly hope that it was when Rafe was in a good headspace but with the way life was going, you didn't know when that would be. 
"Well, the stupid part is kind of debatable." You shrugged as you stabbed a piece of carrot with your fork. 
"Hey!" Rafe laughed softly as he kicked your leg under the table, his hand reaching for his glass of scotch. 
"I mean it though... thank you for doing all of this."
You said as you looked at him, your eyes full of love for the man you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with. He simply nods as he pours himself another drink, but you can tell from the light coat of pink on his cheeks that he is blushing. "I love you." You finished as you reached your hand over to hold the one that had a grasp on the bottle while he was still pouring a flood of alcohol into his glass. The action stopped him in his tracks as you lowered his hand and he let go of the half-full bottle. 
"I love you too, baby." He muttered the phrase as he looked into your eyes causing yours to water as you pulled away to fix the napkin on your lap and then began to eat the slightly burnt food your boyfriend had prepared.
-Six days later- 
From: Sister-in-law✨
Hey
Sent 4:34 pm
It's Sarah. I changed my number a few weeks ago I'm not sure if you have it or not.
Sent 4:34 pm
I just wanted to let you know that I broke into Tannyhill like an hour ago to get a few of my things and heard a girl in Rafe's room. 
Sent 4:36 pm
It didn't sound like you and if I'm wrong then I'm sorry but I don't think I am. 
Sent 4:37 pm
You stared at the messages in front of you as your eyes continued to read over them just like they had for the last five minutes. You couldn't seem to tear them away. 
You had known Sarah for the last three years, even before she went all pogue and left the only life she had ever known. And though you were confused about why she did at first- when Ward's toxic actions had come to light, you had driven your overly priced car over to the shack John B called home and simply hugged the girl. She had cried in your arms because she knew that even though you loved her brother, you had believed her and loved her too. 
Even when you had sat on the kook side of the courthouse the day John B was arrested, your sympathetic gaze was enough to let her know that you weren't sure what to do and chose to stick by the only life you had ever known, and she couldn't fault you for that. She would have done the same if it was just another Pogue, but it wasn't. It was the man she loved and she knew that you loved Rafe and needed to do what was right for your relationship.
You had called her later that night to give her any information that you might have known about what Rafe and Ward were planning which ultimately led to John B getting out... she would never forget what you did. 
You were her sister more than Rafe was her brother and that wasn't going to change just because you were doing what it took to keep the man you loved safe, just like she was. 
A tear dropped from your eye and landed on the blue messages causing some of the words to blur as you hastily pulled yourself out of your bedroom and ran to your car.
You couldn't even remember the ride over as you hurried up the stairs of Tannyhill. You did know one thing though, Sarah wouldn't have lied to you and even when you hoped Rafe hadn’t lied to you earlier that morning when he assured you that you could head back to your family home- It made sense to you. He sent you home so he could finally get alone time with his side piece. 
You whipped his door open and simply nodded to yourself when your boyfriend quickly pulled away from the blue-eyed redhead to meet your eyes before quickly rolling off the bed and pulling on his shorts when he finally processed who was standing in the doorway. You ran down the stairs of the biggest home on the island and the place that you had called your second home for the last three years.
You could hear the sound of the girl calling for him and the sound of him practically flying down the stairs behind you in hopes of catching you before you made it to your car and the probability of you running him over became more likely than you hearing him out.
He was faster than you thought as his large hand wrapped around your forearm, stopping you in your tracks. You whip around with your hand raised as you prepare to smack him across the face but he catches your arm with his other hand before he harshly shoves you backward. Tears run down your cheeks as you head down his too-long driveway and it certainly doesn't help that you decided to park right at the gate and run to his home. 
"Baby, just stop-" He started his voice thick as he ran after you, but he was cut off before he could speak further.
"Don't call me that! You can't just baby me and I'll somehow find it in myself to forgive you. It's not happening. Have a nice life with Merida." You shot back, your tone quickly turned from heartbroken to mocking as the second stage of grief took over.
"Look... after my dad, I just..." He bowed his head after he had finally found an excuse you may actually fall for as all the kind actions you had done for him after his father died flashed through his mind, a chill ran through him as guilt began to run through him as the extent of his choices had begun to settle in. He chose getting in the pants of a random girl over his girlfriend who had stood by him after all the bad he had done. A part of him hoped that you would do that this time- bend your morals to keep him by your side. 
"Jesus Christ! Don't you dare use his death as an excuse!" You shutter out a breath as you refuse to fall for his guilt-tripping. You knew that you act crazy when experiencing grief, you had experienced it yourself when you had lost your mother a few years back. You went through the stages of grief alone as your father travelled in hopes of returning and being a better father to you but instead of him becoming a better father, his running off completely ruined your relationship. You were all alone for months with no one by your side, until you met Rafe six months after the death of your mother. And though he didn't help you through it directly, his presence had filled some of the hole in your heart and had given you something else to focus on. 
You had been through the loss of your mother who died of stomach cancer, the loss of your cousin who was murdered and the loss of your younger sister who had perished in a car accident when you were twelve. You had known more about loss than anyone you had been close with and knew firsthand how grief could affect you- especially when you lose a parent- but Rafe had, had your support and love through it all. You had been by his side through it all even though he and his dad weren't close, even though your boyfriend had hired a hitman on his own father only to cheat on his girlfriend and blame it on his father when he had been dead for four and a half months. 
"Look," You continued as you brought your weakened arms up to your hips as you scrutinized him dead in his eye. "I'm sorry about your dad. I really am- but newsflash the guys dead! And he has been for months- and for months, I've been bending over backwards to help you get through it just for you... to prove to me that I made a mistake. That I wasted not just months of my life helping you but years of my life loving you." You saw the range of emotions that flashed over his face as he attempted to process your words. It started with tears at the mention of his father, but his sadness flashed to anger as you began to mention all you had done for him and looked as though he was about to interrupt you but you just kept going, until it flashed to something darker.
"I told you when we started out that I had three deal breakers. Disrespect of any kind, lying and cheating- and so far you've managed to cross them all off, didn't you? Should I start yelling bingo?" You let out an angry laugh that resembles a heartbroken one as you turn around and head to your car.
"If you take one more step, I will make sure you regret it." His words came out like they were natural like you were one of the people he despised most. As if you hadn’t been the most important person to him for the last three years. It was jarring how different his voice was when he wasn’t telling you he loved you. 
You stop in your tracks as a chill runs down your spine, there is something in his tone... an edge it has that sends a warning through you. You know what he's done and what he's capable of. And as much as it hurt you to think this, you could count every time he had ever scared on one hand but right now, this wasn't just fear creeping through you- it was terror. 
He didn't have anything to lose anymore. His mother had been gone since he was thirteen, Sarah had chosen her true family over her blood family, Rose had taken Wheezie just days after Ward's body was found and had run for the hills without even taking a second thought about the grief her stepchildren were going through while holding on to the remaining gold and lastly, the one person he loved more than this his siblings and more than you- his father- was gone and he was never coming back. 
He was no longer enrolled in college anymore and even if he was, he never went to his classes and definitely wouldn't now. He didn't have a job other than his half-assed company he was so hellbent on making. A large part of you felt sorry for him; he was going through a lot and didn't have anyone by his side, but an even larger part of you felt more bad for yourself. You loved him blindly, stuck with him after he took someone's life, stayed with him after he tried to kill his sister twice, stayed with him through his cocaine addiction, stayed with him after the death of his father and after his youngest sister was taken from him. You would have willingly been his home had he not shown you time and time again that he would stray for something else that caught his attention. First it it was the coke, then the gold, then his father's approval and now some random girl. You would have been crazed to even consider staying with him this time and to be frank, it didn't even cross your mind. 
"Is that a threat, Rafe? You gonna kill me like you killed Peterkin?" You asked sharply.
"Nah...you'll just have to wait and see. You're gonna regret ever leaving his driveway." A small, creepy smile spread across his face and it was that damn smile that showed you that you were right to be done with him. He had finally lost it. 
"Yeah, I don't think I will. Nothing you do to me would be worse than staying with you." And with those words you took that one step, the one that would seal your fate as you took those final steps to your sleek car before you pulled yourself in and slammed the door. Through the windshield window, you could see Rafe still standing there with his arms crossed as if he was expecting you to hop out of your car and run to him but he was clearly mistaken as you shifted your car gear and stepped on the gas like your life depended on it and in your defence, you were as you hurtled out of Tannyhill without looking back.
And though it was reckless you pulled out your phone as you slowed down on the gas when you considered yourself a safe distance away from your crazed ex boyfriend. With your phone in your hand, you opened up Sarah's contact and your eyes locked on her earlier messages. The same messages that seemed to blow up your three-year relationship. 
Hey
Sent 4:34 pm
It's Sarah. I changed my number a few weeks ago I'm not sure if you have it or not.
Sent 4:34 pm
I just wanted to let you know that I broke into Tannyhill like an hour ago to get a few of my things and heard a girl in Rafe's room. 
Sent 4:36 pm
It didn't sound like you and if I'm wrong then I'm sorry but I don't think I am. 
Sent 4:37 pm
You changed contact to: Sista from another mista ✨
To: Sista from another mista ✨
Thank you for telling me. It wasn't me. It was some rando Rafe was screwing.
Sent 5:59 pm
Me and your brother are done
Sent 5:59 pm
I am so sorry that I didn't leave him sooner, I was stupid but I'm not anymore. 
Sent 6:00 pm
I love you :/
Sent 6:02 pm
And a few minutes later you were in some fast food restaurant parking lot eating way too much food while slurping down a large milkshake as you accepted that multiple years of your life were wasted when Sarah finally responded. 
From: Sista from another mista✨
Omg Y/N, I'm so so so sorry
Read 6:16 pm
As much as I thought he loved you, he can never put anyone above himself and I'm sorry if you're not in the mood to shit talk him but you deserve better
Read 6:17 pm
You always have and it hurts that you're just realizing it now. 
Read 6:17 pm
No matter what you will always be my sister. I may love you even more now that you had the guts to leave him. 
Read 6:18 pm
To: Sister-in-law✨
It's fine. I was dumb asf, I guess I needed him to screw someone else to realize. 
Read 6:18 pm
Rafe is chaos and I guess I am too. 
Read 6:18 pm
Nothing has to change between you and me. I could even stop by more without Rafe on my ass. 
Read 6:18 pm
From: Sister-in-law✨
Yes!! That's such an upside and don't beat yourself up over it. You are not chaos. Rafe is. At least you left, my mom never did.
Read 6:19 pm
You could feel the hurt through the message. She loved her mom but she had never left her father even though he was a less-than-stellar husband. You had done what her mother didn't. 
I'm ALWAYS here if you need to talk, no judgment. 
Read 6:20 pm
I love you💗 always
Read 6:20 pm
To: Sister-in-law✨
I love you too Sare<3
Hearted 6:21 pm
The next day your life was flipped upside down after you received a call from Yale University to personally notify you that you had been expelled for unlawful drug use after Rafe had anonymously sent a video to your university of you doing coke for the first time two years ago after he had talked you into it and you hadn’t done it since as you didn't like how it made you feel. He even went as far as getting someone to plant a small amount of coke in your car resulting in you getting arrested in a ditch after being pulled over. After that, your father gave you an ultimatum. He speaks to Topper's grandfather who is a respected judge- and gets him to let you off the hook if you go to a rehab centre or you get charged for carrying drugs in your car and get up to a year in prison. And no matter how much you tried to convince him that you didn't do cocaine and that it was only that one time, he didn't even want to hear you out.
And as much as you didn't want to go to rehab, you knew that it was better than prison. 
Though you knew Rafe would want to get revenge on you for breaking it off with him, you never would have expected him to partake in such a deliberate and evil takedown for experiencing the consequences of his selfish actions. It was insane to think that you had spent years of your life with a man who you thought would do anything for you, he had looked at you like you hung the moon and the stars yet he had disrespected you and humiliated you beyond belief for some random girl? You had never seen her before so you could only assume she was a Pogue which you highly doubted from the way he spoke about lower-class people, so that could only mean that she was a tourist. He had thrown your whole relationship away for some girl who was gonna leave a few days later but he felt the need to single-handedly ruin your life for having a problem with it? 
You had kicked yourself every day you spent in the hellhole that was rehab, the doctors looked down upon you like you were the bane of their existence, it was exhausting constantly being judged for being an addict when you weren't even one, to begin with. Hell, the place made you want to do drugs. You couldn't quite understand why a place that was supposed to help you overcome addiction would do so little good with the amount of money that goes into funding them. 
Your stay at the rehab centre was only two months but it took you seven months to return to OBX as you were sent to go live with your aunt, Mae, in New York. And in those five months, you stewed as you put a plan into action to wreak havoc upon the man who ruined your life.
Now, eight months after the fall of the most talked about couple on the island- you were sitting in the country club sipping a pina colada that a pretty bartender made while wearing a beautiful floral dress. 
The booming sound of your ex-boyfriend's laugh brought you out of your head as you slowly turned your neck to look over at the approaching man, and thankfully he was by the other side of the bar which caused a smile to curl up your lips slightly as your plan seemed to set into motion, however- your smile dropped as he leaned down to kiss the pretty bartender who made your drink just a few minutes prior shocking you to your core. 
You had heard from Sarah that Rafe was dating some poor girl from the cut but you hadn't expected it to be the girl you had just made small talk with a few minutes ago, and you certainly hadn't expected her to be...her.
From your conversation, you could tell that she was a very sweet girl who was just trying to change the financial situation that she had been born into and you admired that deeply. In said conversation, you had learned that she was twenty-two making you two the same age and that she was born in Mexico City but moved to the cut when she was very young. 
You also couldn't ignore the fact that she was beautiful and if you were going to be serious, you were pretty jealous and not because Rafe had moved on- but because he was dating one of the most beautiful girls you had ever seen while you were tucked away in a facility or stuck in the presence of your annoying cousins.
You tuck a piece of hair behind your ear as you listen to their conversation.
"Hey, baby." He used to call me that. "I missed you this morning." So their sleeping over? You picked apart every word of their conversation, you couldn't even help yourself.
"I know," she laughed, "I'm sorry, again. I had to cover Gaby's shift."
"Yeah, yeah whatever you say." He laughed causing her to grin before she slapped his chest. "I gotta go, Toppers waiting. I just wanted to say hi and put our drinks in. I'll take-" He began to list what he wanted before the shorter girl shook her head as if she had already memorized his order, and she had.
"I know... Topper want the usual?" She asked as she began to tap on the device behind the bar to type in his drink order.
"Yeah, thanks." She nods in response, her eyes fixated on the task at hand. "Love you." He smiles as he backs away, his eyes still focused on his girlfriend. 
He used to say that to me all the time, you thought. 
Those words grab her attention as she looks up with a smile so wide you guessed that it hurt but it suited her quite nicely. "Love you." After that; he turned away and headed to his table and Sofia turned back to the monitor in front of her. Then, as if she sensed your eyes on her she pulled hers away from the screen and looked over at you. She smiled at you and if it wasn't so sweet you would have guessed that she was rubbing it in your face. 
"Would you like another?" She asked as she pointed to your nearly empty drink, you nodded gently and she turned around to work on your drink, deciding that her boyfriends and his best friends could wait. 
A wide smile fills the space of the small one that had covered your face just a minute ago as you mentally changed your whole plan of taking Rafe down for a crime he didn't commit after deciding that you had a better one in mind. One that he wouldn't never see coming and it all involved your ex-boyfriend's new girl and man- it was going to feel good.
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nerdallwritey · 5 hours ago
Text
About to Strike (Part 1)
***IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ: ONCE AGAIN I've yapped too much and this chapter became longer than tumblr likes, so I've split it into two posts. It's the same drill as Cheeks All Flushed: The smut is in the other part if you'd rather skip shenanigans and Get To Business. And that's valid! Part 2 is here and also linked down below. Apologies! It IS all in one place on AO3 if you'd prefer that!
Summary: Before Astarion could protest more, you took a sip of the drink.  He gasped. “Darling, what do you think you’re doing?” “Building trust,” you said, smiling at Jaheira. Her features echoed your own and she took a sip as well.  “Ah, what the hells,” Karlach said. “Bottoms up!” She downed her own goblet. “You’re all idiots and I hope you die,” Astarion crossed his arms.  OR The gang finally makes their way into the Shadow Cursed Lands.
Pairing: Astarion x f!reader Rating: 18+ Word count: 21.3k (This particular part is 10.7k) CW: smut, reader is new to sex, piv sex, oral (male receiving), hand job, vaginal fingering, mentions of Astarion's past trauma, blood drinking, mild angst, protective Astarion, soft Astarion, whimpering Astarion, porn with feelings, reader is an idiot (and a bard), so is Astarion (not a bard, just an idiot), lots of party banter, AND JAHEIRA!! Spoilers: Minor spoilers for Act 1 and 2 (in-game dialogue, plot points, etc.), as well as Astarion's plotline Also posted to: AO3 FAIR WARNING: This is PART 6 in my series, "Beauty and the Bard." Find the masterlist here.
a/n: SURPRISE! Part 6 is COMPLETE and she's A LOT. The back half is mainly smut and feelings and Astarion processing emotions a little which we LOVE to see. I hope to the gods that you guys find this to be a good followup to Worth the Peril, but I'm excited to FINALLY be in Act 2 and get into the big romantic scenes that happen there. Thank you all so much for sticking around and loving this goofy version of Astarion and his favorite bard :) You guys are the best and I adore and appreciate every single one of you! Please enjoy these silly little vignettes from the end of Act 1 and the start of Act 2! (Thank you as always to my beta @kermitwazowski for reading!) As a reminder, last time you got Mega Hurt in a fight and Astarion kind of took that personally.
Taglist: Moved to the comment section, since tumblr hates sharing fun with friends - please let me know if you'd like to be added to the list!
“Would you relax?” you whispered sharply to the vampire currently brooding to your right.
“How can I be when this… ancient woman just tried to murder you?” Astarion threw a dramatic hand forward, gesturing to Jaheira, who was walking in front of you towards the Last Light Inn. You all had just arrived at the well lit sanctuary in the Shadow Cursed Lands, only to be interrogated by the High Harper, and vouched for by Mol, who’d managed to find her way here as well.
“I handled it,” you hissed. “It’s going to be okay.”
“While I admire your optimism, darling, I still don’t trust her.”
Karlach buzzed behind you, clearly in disbelief. “Mate, you must be joking. That’s the Jaheira!”
Astarion slowed his pace a bit to meet Karlach’s eye. “And, I take it, you know the old crone?”
“Astarion!” Wyll sounded surprised. “You’ve lived in Baldur’s Gate longer than I have! And you don’t know the tales they tell of Jaheira and her party of adventurers?”
Your crew of seven came to a halt in front of a moss covered fountain to gawk at the elf.
He clicked his tongue. “Mmm… that’d be a no.”
“He’s lying,” Shadowheart rolled her eyes.
“I am not!”
Gale lifted a quizzical eyebrow. “Come now, Astarion, surely you’ve heard passing tales of the heroes of Baldur’s Gate? Or perhaps read a book of their exploits?”
Lae’zel narrowed her eyes. “I do not know of this ‘Jah-hee-rah’ person. Her heroics must not be that impressive if I have never heard of her.”
“Nor I,” Halsin cut in.
“Yes, well, being freakish outsiders from the Astral Plane and the middle of the forest will deprive you of basic history lessons.” Astarion crossed his arms.
You snorted. “So what’s your excuse?” The others snickered. 
Astarion placed an annoyed hand on his hip. “Did you all forget that I was kept as a slave for two hundred years of pure misery and torture?”
The group remained silent for a moment before you stepped forward to kiss his cheek. “You’re still not over that?” 
He smirked. “Would you believe it’s taking me a little longer than one might expect?”
“Shame,” you pouted. Then you looked at Karlach who was angling her head around the fountain to track where Jaheira had gone. “You want to enlighten these three, Karlach?”
Karlach looked back at you all and her eyes lit up with glee. “Oh, yes please!” She rolled her shoulders and bounced on her feet as if she were preparing for battle, rather than recounting basic Baldur’s Gate history. She cleared her throat before she spoke. “Years ago - over a century-”
You turned to Astarion and caught his eye. A century! your expression seemed to say.
Astarion shrugged his shoulders up to his ears and unwrapped one of his crossed arms to hold dramatically in front of himself. So what?
You rolled your eyes. So you should have been there!
He narrowed his eyes and shook his head. I don’t know what to tell you.
You huffed some hair out of your eyes and tuned back in to what Karlach was saying.
“-Jaheira was part of a group that saved Baldur’s Gate from Seravok - a Bhaalspawn trying to plunge the city into war.”
Once again, you caught Astarion’s eye. “And you don’t recall any of this?”
He pursed his lips as the others turned to look at him. “Now that you mention it, I vaguely recall tensions being rather high around the city all those years ago.”
“Liar,” Shadowheart accused again. “It had to be more apparent than that. Why don’t you just admit you know who Jaheira is?”
Astarion’s response was venomous: “I was kept on a very tight leash, thank you, so apologies for not getting the names of the heroes who ‘saved’ the city that kept me enslaved for another hundred years.” 
You approached him quietly and took his hand. He scowled at Shadowheart but wrenched his gaze away to look at you. His expression softened mildly.
“It’s okay,” you said gently. “I’m sure she would have come for you and your siblings had she known.”
“Yes, probably come to kill us for being abominations,” he muttered, but squeezed your hand anyway.
“Ah, don’t be like that, Astarion,” Wyll said cheerfully. “I’m sure she would have helped you! You’re quite fun once you get past all the prickly bits.”
“Gee, thanks,” Astarion said flatly. 
Karlach took the awkward silence that followed as an opportunity to keep fangirling. “My mum used to tell us stories all about them - the legends who protected the city from evil. She said Jaheira was a powerful druid. Adamant. Tough.”
“Probably a good ally to have on our side,” you said. Your companions nodded in agreement.
“I’ve told myself those stories thousands of times since,” Karlach continued. “I never thought I’d meet Jaheira. She’s a hero, and I was always… some Outer City kid.”
“Well, excellent news, Karlach,” Gale said. “Given our circumstances and the path we currently find ourselves on, it’s quite possible that we might be considered heroes one day.”
“Chk,” Lae’zel scoffed. “We don’t even know what we’re up against yet. It is likely some of you will perish before we are able to slay this unknown enemy.”
Shadowheart rolled her eyes. “Charming as always, Lae’zel.”
“I am not charming. I am merely stating fact.”
Halsin cleared his throat. “Another druid you say, Karlach?” Karlach grinned and nodded. “She’s the best! Can’t believe she wants to talk to us about working together. What a day!”
And what a day it had been. 
Or, tenday, more like.
~~~~~
The day after you’d told Astarion’s sleeping form that you loved him, he’d been nothing but clingy. 
You awoke to find him still curled tightly into your side, but now he was fully awake, his eyes wide and unblinking. It was unnerving.
“Can I help you?” you asked.
He blinked rapidly before an easy grin rested on his lips. “Just making sure you still have a pulse, darling.”
You snorted. “Checking on your food supply, I see.”
Astarion angled his head to nuzzle his nose along your throat before kissing your pulse point. “What can I say,” he murmured against your skin, “we vampires have two instincts, as we learned from that book yesterday: ‘feed and make little vampires.’” He scrunched his face into a silent roar, baring his fangs and forming one of his hands into a claw. He slashed it through the air playfully.
“Yes well, the latter probably won’t be happening for a little while,” you said, shifting to sit up, but wincing in pain over the wound in your torso. 
Astarion was rolling off the pillows within seconds and coming around to help you sit up. His eyes were concerned, but he pouted and his voice was teasingly whiny when he said, “Pity.” He rested his forehead against your temple. “I do so miss being inside of you.”
You nearly choked on your own spit, which had him pulling away from you and laughing. 
“Whatever,” you muttered, watching as Astarion pulled his shirt over his head. 
“Hungry, my sweet?” he asked, still smiling.
“You’re really freaking me out,” you said, giving him a sideways look, “with how nice you’re being.”
Astarion rolled his eyes. “Fine. Starve.” With that, he exited your tent with a theatrical swoosh of the flaps that acted as a door.
You exhaled a disbelieving laugh, watching as the flaps swished back and forth before settling back into their closed position.
“SHE’S WHAT?!” you heard Karlach shriek, followed by loud, bounding footsteps approaching your tent. 
Astarion called after her in annoyance, “Don’t bother her!”
“Soldier!” Karlach’s head and shoulders popped their way into your tent. “So happy you’re awake!”
“Hi Karlach,” you laughed. “I’d get up but-”
Karlach shook her head. “Don’t move a muscle. I’m sure Shadowheart and Halsin will want to change your bandages and pump you full of potions but… I’m so glad you’re okay.”
“Me too,” you said. “Thank you for helping while I was unconscious.”
“You’d do the same for any of us,” she said earnestly, still on her hands and knees in the entrance of your tent. 
You heard a dull thump outside that had Karlach yelping in surprise. 
“Out,” came Astarion’s sour tone, his tongue putting extra emphasis on the “t.”
Karlach looked back over her shoulder and then over to you. “He kicked my boot, the bastard! Proper hard, too!”
“I’d do a lot worse if you weren’t a walking furnace.” Another thump informed you that he kicked Karlach’s boot again.
Rather than retreat, however, Karlach settled her elbows into the dirt and rested her head in her hands. “Ask nicely.” She met your eye with a mischievous grin. 
You heard Astarion squawk incredulously. “Darling, tell her to move!”
Clearing your throat to keep from laughing, you said firmly, “Astarion. Be nice. That’s my dear friend, Karlach, you’re kicking.”
He muttered something you couldn’t make out, followed by a loud groan. 
Through gritted teeth, he said, “Dear, sweet, Karlach-” 
“Liking the sound of this,” Karlach nodded.
“-would you be so kind as to remove your humongous form from the entrance of my lovely bard’s tent?” It sounded as if the words were causing him physical pain.
Karlach looked back at you. “What do you think, Soldier?”
“He could probably do better,” you said with a smirk. But it was then that your stomach decided to growl loudly. 
“Woof,” Karlach said.
You could practically hear Astarion’s eye roll. “You know, if you let me in, I could remedy that little problem you’re experiencing.”
Karlach slanted her mouth to the side. “He’s probably right, Gale left behind a bunch of-” she waggled her fingers, “-magic-y warm food for you before he, Shadowheart, Lae’zel, and Wyll headed out this morning.”
You cocked your head to the side. “And you didn’t go with them?”
“Are you kidding?” she asked. “And miss you possibly waking up?”
You smiled at her fondly. “That’s very sweet of you.”
“Besides, I don’t trust myself around all the explodey mushrooms down here.”
Astarion cleared his throat loudly.
“Alright, Fangs, don’t get your panties in a twist.” Karlach looked over her shoulder at him before looking back at you once more. “Let me know if you need anything. You know where to find me.” She pointed to her temple, referring to the tadpole connection, and winked. She crawled backwards on her hands and knees, purposely taking her time, before she fully exited the tent. 
Astarion took her place instantly, crawling into the space with a plate of steaming scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, bread, and a pair of healing potions. He placed the entire thing on your lap, along with a fork, before settling onto the ground next to you. 
You blinked at him. “Breakfast in bed?” 
He scoffed. “It isn’t as if you can join us at the breakfast table.”
Smiling softly, you reached out a hand to cup his cheek. “Thank you, my love. This is very kind of you.”
He still scowled, but his face softened when he took your hand from his cheek and kissed your palm. “I expect the same kind of pampering in return if I’m ever to practically die as foolishly as you.”
You laughed before picking up the fork and stabbing some egg. “I’ll keep that in mind.” 
~~~~~
And for the first few days, it did feel like pampering: Astarion staying by your side at all times - reading to you, laying with you, changing your bandages… He only ever left to feed himself. He refused your blood, citing that you needed it more than him, even though your bleeding had slowed to a halt by the third day. 
It all felt very nice.
Until you felt well enough to get back on your feet.
The others had dutifully been wrapping things up in the Underdark; defeating monsters, freeing deep gnomes from their drow and duergar slavers, rescuing the halfling woman’s husband, and exploring an abandoned wizard’s tower and the temple to Shar, to name a few. Lae’zel had even gifted you a new longsword she’d found, Phalar Aluve - a sword with the ability to sing or shriek - claiming that this weapon would not have allowed you to be wounded as fatally, had you had it during the duergar battle in the decrepit village.
On the day they raided the Zhentarim cache Astarion had mentioned all those days ago, he’d remained dutifully by your side, much to your dismay and protests that you’d be fine without him for a few hours.
“Absolutely not,” he’d said, looking down his nose at you. “As if Halsin or Shadowheart could care for you as properly as I have.”
“You forget,” you’d responded, mildly annoyed, “that they’re the ones who taught you how to care for me.”
“And I’m the one who shall continue to care for you,” he huffed, finishing changing your bandages once again. By this time, you could sit up on your own with mild to no pain at all. You were perfectly capable of changing your own bandages, but Astarion had insisted on continuing to help you. 
You supposed it was nice that he wanted to take care of you, given how much he usually hated being responsible for anything, but he was taking the job a bit too seriously.
Luckily, Karlach and Lae’zel had lugged some chests they’d been unable to open at the Zhentarim storeroom back to camp, allowing your beloved rogue to take part in the raid, despite not attending himself, and thus allowing you a moment of peace to roll off your pillows and put on fresh clothes without his help.
You emerged from your tent to look at the spoils from the storeroom, standing up straight and walking on your own. Astarion hadn’t noticed at first, too busy fiddling with the lock of a particularly large chest, but the commotion created by your companions forced him to look in your direction. 
“You’re up!” Wyll exclaimed.
“Do you need any help?” Gale snapped the book he was reading closed.
“Give her some space,” Shadowheart said, assessing you with her eyes from a few feet away.
Astarion got up and hurried over to you. “What do you think you’re doing?”
You smiled at him reassuringly. “I promise I feel well enough to be out here. I just wanted some fresh, Underdark air.” You looked over his shoulder at one of the open chests. “Find anything good?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Nothing worth you getting out of bed for.” He looked you up and down and noticed your change of clothes. He sighed. “I could have helped-”
“I’m fine,” you maintained, placing your hands on his shoulders and looking him directly in the eyes.
Halsin approached the two of you and nodded approvingly. “It is good for her to be up and moving around. It’ll stretch the healing muscles and allow her to join the fray again much more quickly than if she stays in bed all day.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes. “Oh, what do you know?”
“Astarion,” Shadowheart said in warning. “If she says she’s okay, let’s believe her. I’m sure she’ll tell you if something’s wrong this time around, right?” She made pointed eye contact with you. 
You held up your hand as if swearing an oath. “I promise.”
He watched you closely, narrowing his eyes and sniffing pompously. “Fine.” 
He made no move to leave your side.
You rolled your eyes and walked over to the chest he’d been working on, the thieves’ tools still stuck inside the lock. You patted the top of the chest and said, “Don’t let me interrupt you.”
Astarion watched you carefully before he made his way back to the chest and sunk to his knees. 
Not far off, Lae’zel was polishing her greatsword. “Does this mean you are well enough to accompany us to the crèche?”
“Well, I-”
“No,” said every other person at camp at once.
“Chk,” Lae’zel thrust her greatsword into the dirt in front of her. “Heal faster.”
“Trying my best,” you said with a shrug. 
Lae’zel rolled her eyes and returned to assessing her greatsword.
“If you’re going to be up and about,” Shadowheart said, “you should probably start packing up your belongings for when we need to enter the Mountain Pass.”
“Augh!” you exclaimed loudly, clutching your side. Astarion was up immediately and you leaned your weight on him, throwing your arms around his neck for support. “So sorry, Shadowheart,” you said in a fake strained tone, “my wound… it prevents me… from hard labor…” You flopped fully into Astarion’s side, closing your eyes and sticking out your tongue as if you’d just perished on the spot.
“Oh good,” Astarion said blandly, “she’s finally dead and I can get on with my life.”
You kicked him.
“Uh huh,” Shadowheart crossed her arms. “Such a shame she’ll never be able to annoy us again.”
“I’ll haunt you forever…” you murmured, wobbling your voice like a ghost.
 Shadowheart stepped forward and patted your arm. “I’ll ask for blessings from Lady Shar on behalf of your passing.”
“Thank you…” you murmured again.
Astarion bumped his hip into yours forcefully. “Would you get off of me?”
You pulled back and smiled at him. “See? I’m fine.”
He humphed and returned to unlocking the big chest, only to find it full of more thieves' tools. He sighed heavily and rested his forehead on the edge of the chest. You peered inside and laughed.
“Aw,” you said sympathetically and patted his shoulder. “I’m going to get some food.”
“Let me-” 
“No,” you said firmly. “Keep going through your useless chests, my love. I’ll be right over here.” You walked over to the makeshift kitchen area Gale had set up. 
Astarion watched you go, and you felt his protective eyes remain on you for the remainder of the night. 
~~~~~
It was like that now: Astarion trying to do things for you while you insisted you could do them on your own. 
It had bewildered you when he actually helped you pack for your trip back to the surface. He had little to pack of his own, given that he’d more or less lived in your tent throughout your stay in the Underdark. He was relentlessly cautious with you, insisting that Gale cast Fly on you so that you didn’t have to ascend the impossibly long ladder back up into the Goblin camp. And he rarely let you out of his sight, even when safely surrounded by your other companions. 
The Mountain Pass was beautiful: bathed in what seemed like permanently golden light that had Astarion blooming in the sun’s glow once again. When your group accidentally stumbled into a hostile party of undead while looking for a place to camp, Astarion had taken your hand and pulled you behind him to shield you with his body. 
“I can help!” you’d pleaded, watching your friends sling spells and swords at the skeletons.
“Let us handle this,” Astarion had growled, slashing his daggers through a ghoul that came a little too close to you for comfort. He kept you both to the outskirts of the fight.
Try as you might to help, Astarion held you back, glaring at you for drawing the attention of a ghast when you cast Thunder Wave in its direction. You gave him an apologetic smile before he fatally stabbed the ghast in the chest. 
Bloodied and burnt out, you and your companions finally found a decent place to camp, close to the monastery that Lae’zel was sure housed the crèche. She took the lead on making a plan to enter the building and find the cure that had been promised to her all her life. You sat by the fire, listening idly to her plans, knowing full well that no one - except maybe Lae’zel herself - wanted you fighting so soon after your injury. You also knew that, should the cure be legitimate, your friends would happily accompany you back into the crèche where you could have the tadpole removed. You chose not to linger on the thought of your adventure possibly coming to an end so soon.
Unsurprisingly, Astarion sat by your side, mending a pair of pants. His knee was pressed lightly into your upper thigh as he hunched over the fabric to see his thread better. 
“You could be doing that in my tent, you know,” you said quietly, watching his fingers nimbly weave the fabric back together with needle and thread. “It’s probably easier to see what you’re doing surrounded by candles from all sides than just this fire. I don’t want you to burn yourself.”
“I’m quite skilled at seeing in darkness, thank you,” he said, not looking over at you.
You exhaled softly and leaned your head on his shoulder, effectively stretching your right side, which housed your wound. He paused momentarily, then kept going. 
“I’m okay,” you said softly, barely audible above the roaring fire and the heated discussion of possible battle strategy amongst your companions a few feet away. “I’m not going to get hurt like that again.”
Astarion sighed and halted his work on the pants. “You can’t promise that,” he said, sounding annoyed. He spoke his next words quickly, equal parts irritated and vulnerable: “You have no idea what’s coming and neither do I or any of us and I know you’re capable of protecting yourself but the least I can do right now is make sure you heal properly and don’t get hurt again because if I lost you… I wouldn’t know what to do.” He cleared his throat and looked back down at the fabric in his lap. “Or… whatever.” 
You smiled softly and lifted your head from his shoulder to kiss his cheek. “I adore you.”
He exhaled an amused breath through his nose. “You’re fine, too.” 
“Thank you for looking out for me.”
He sighed dramatically. “It’s been dreadful.”
You laughed. “I can’t even begin to imagine the sacrifices you’ve made.”
He brought his hands up to count on his fingers. “I’ve barely slept, I’ve been drinking animal plonk as opposed to your delicious vintage, I’ve hardly killed anything in the last few days, and I haven’t been able to sleep with you for just as long, if not longer.”
You were glad he wasn’t looking right at you, otherwise he’d surely see the flush on your cheeks. “You’ve been sleeping with me nearly every night.”
He nudged your unwounded side with his elbow. “You know what I mean.”
You smirked. “I miss you too,” you said. “And I’m sorry. You don’t need to be giving up all of that for me.”
He leaned his head on top of yours which had found its way back to his shoulder. “Just… heal, would you? You wretched thing.”
You reached your hand to rest on top of his knee. “You must be starving.”
“In more ways than one,” he growled teasingly in your ear. 
“I’m serious.”
“As am I. But your blood stays off limits until I’m sure you’re done bleeding.”
You made a frustrated noise. “I haven’t bled in days, you stubborn leech. And you nearly killed me the first time you drank from me, so really, what’s the difference?”
“Yes, but we weren’t us back then. You were just some bard that I crash landed on a horrid beach with.” 
“Hmm,” you hummed through pursed lips.
Now Astarion bent to kiss your cheek. “I’m just being extra careful, my sweet.” He moved his mouth to your ear. “And… it’ll be all the more exquisite when I finally taste you again.”
“Ah,” you said. “So you’re edging yourself.”
Astarion sputtered, “That’s not-” Then he smirked. “And what would you know about edging?”
You swallowed thickly. “Enough.”
He chuckled darkly. “Noted.”
It was quieter now, as your companions had dispersed to their own tents to prepare for tomorrow’s journey to the crèche. 
Still, Astarion kept his voice down. “I have an important question for you though, my darling.”
“And what would that be?”
“Whose belongings should we peruse first tomorrow while everyone’s gone?”
~~~~~
The only interesting items you’d found while snooping around camp the next day were cheap erotic novels hidden among both Shadowheart’s and Wyll’s possessions. 
Everyone, minus Halsin, who was sticking around the edge of camp planning a way through the Shadow Cursed Lands, had made their way to the crèche only a few hours before. 
“‘The Salty Mermaid,’” you’d said, waggling your eyebrows at Astarion who was rifling through Wyll’s tent. 
“You’ll never believe this, darling.” He turned to show you the same book, its illustrated cover even more worn than the copy you’d found in one of Shadowheart’s bags. 
“Shut up,” you said, leaning forward to snatch the book from his hand and holding the copies side by side. Both depicted a shirtless man gazing into the eyes of a beautiful, topless mermaid, her torso turned tastefully away from view. Their mouths were parted slightly in anticipation of a steaming kiss, ocean mist spraying over them and the rock they were perched on in the middle of the ocean. Wyll’s copy looked as though it had been read dozens of times over the span of many years, while Shadowheart’s was newer and gave the impression that it had been opened frequently, given the way the cover refused to rest against the first page.
“This is outrageous,” Astarion said, sitting behind you and resting his chin on your shoulder to look at both books. 
You turned your head to look at him. “Didn’t take those two for naughty book lovers?”
“What? Oh, no, everyone in this camp is a deeply sad, depraved creature, that’s not it.”
You snorted. “Okay, so what-”
“It’s that they didn’t think to include us in their little book club!” His hand gestured wildly between the covers. “You and I read all the time!”
“We don’t know they’re reading them together,” you pointed out. “Maybe it’s a coincidence.”
Astarion looked at you skeptically. “Do you really believe that?”
You thought for a moment. Honestly, you weren’t sure. Your nights had been occupied spending time with the man currently wrapped delicately around your midsection. You couldn’t be sure that your companions hadn’t started a book club without you. It brought a small smile to your face, imagining your friends bonding with each other without your help.
Astarion didn’t wait for you to answer. “Let’s at least see what all the fuss is about.” He leaned forward slightly, careful not to jostle your right side and took Wyll’s book from your hand. He flipped open to a random page as you set Shadowheart’s book on your lap. You leaned your head against his, which was still resting on your shoulder, and read along with him. He tilted his head slightly to read slowly and seductively in your ear. 
“Fabian ran his calloused fingers along Allura’s scales. Her tail quivered in response.” He held out the “s,” as if hissing, and nipped at your ear.
You flinched in surprise and smacked him gently on the side of the head. 
He chuckled and continued. “‘Taste me,’ Allura pleaded. Fabian smashed his lips against hers and their tongues twisted together like two eels in the Sword Sea.”
You barely withheld a laugh. “Trying to seduce me with eels again, I see.” 
Astarion narrowed his eyes, rereading the passage in disbelief. “Oh, gods dammit.”
You nuzzled the side of his head with your own. “It’s working better this time,” you admitted.
“Oh?” Astarion pulled back and met you with a wicked grin. 
You nodded and watched his mouth as he leaned in to kiss you before pulling back just out of his reach. He opened his eyes and gave you a puzzled expression. 
“I didn’t say it worked completely.” You pushed his nose lightly to turn his face away from yours and back to the book in his hands. 
“Why you-” He dropped the book unceremoniously and brought both his hands to your cheeks to kiss you firmly. You laughed against his mouth before giving in and opening up for him.
“Astarion,” came Halsin’s voice from a few yards away. 
Astarion immediately disconnected the kiss and shot a deadly glare at the bear. 
Halsin hadn’t been looking. Instead he’d been focusing down at what he was holding - a half carved piece of wood, something that was beginning to look like a rabbit. When he finally looked up, he halted in his tracks. 
“My apologies,” he said, holding his hands up in a showing of peace, “I merely wanted to ask Astarion for a better knife. It appears my proper carving tools are lost somewhere within our wares.”
“Hi Halsin,” you said nonchalantly. 
Halsin chuckled. “I didn’t mean to disturb your fun.”
“Fun? What fun? We never have fun.” You nudged Astarion who was still staring daggers at Halsin. 
Astarion sighed and settled his chin back on your shoulder. “Relax, darling, I’m sure Halsin knows all about the kind of fun we have together.” 
Halsin nodded. “Far be it from me to interrupt a spry couple preparing to partake in one of nature’s greatest gifts.”
“Ugh,” Astarion groaned in disgust and you felt your cheeks go red. “You make it sound awful.”
“It’s only natural-”
“Did you check our Traveler’s Chest for your carving tools?” you desperately tried to change the subject. “It’s possible one of us packed them in there by mistake.”
Halsin snapped his fingers. “Of course! And the Traveler’s Chest would be…”
You pointed in the direction of the chest, which was thankfully on the other side of camp. 
Halsin followed your gaze and nodded again. “I shall investigate the chest. Sorry once again.” He started to leave the two of you but turned back around.  “Remember to be careful of your wound.” He gestured to your right side and you absently held your hand to the tender area. “Nothing worse than an injury worsened in the throes of passion.”
“Goodbye, Halsin,” Astarion waved him off. 
Halsin chuckled once more, then left the area. You and Astarion remained silent for a moment, watching him go. 
You looked over at him. “Moment over?”
“So incredibly over,” Astarion lifted his chin from your shoulder and crawled around to sit next to you. “But the druid’s right. You’re still hurt.”
You huffed some hair out of your face. “And you’re still a drama queen.”
Astarion gasped and held a hand to his chest dramatically. “How dare you.”
“I’m fine!” you insisted. “Watch this!” 
You stood and leaned your body to the left, stretching your right side and lifting your right arm over your head.
“See?”
Astarion cocked his head to the side. “Impressive. Now stretch the other way.”
You remained upright and ramrod straight. “I don’t want to.”
“Because…?”
“Because…” You rolled your eyes. “Oh, fuck you! You know why.”
“Because you’re still sore-”
“Yes, because I’m still sore.” You sat beside him again and muttered, “killjoy.”
Astarion stood and reached for your hands, holding them in both of his own. “Call me whatever names you like, it won’t change my mind.” He leaned forward and kissed you softly. 
You frowned at him. “Asshole.”
Kiss. “Darling.” 
“Bat brain.”
Kiss. “Beautiful.” 
“Priss.”
Kiss. “My- hey.” He pulled himself back to look down his nose at you. “I’m not a priss,  I’m simply surrounded by frumps. And Shadowheart.”
You scoffed and reached up to brush your hand through his curls, mussing them ever so slightly. 
“Hey!” he exclaimed, pushing you away and reaching up to fix his hair. 
You crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow at him. 
He glared back and rolled his eyes. “Did I not just call you ‘beautiful?’”
“One of your frequent pet names,” you waved him off playfully and went to pick up Shadowheart and Wyll’s discarded books. “It means next to nothing.” Astarion turned to watch you. “That’s not true.”
You laughed. “You call everyone ‘darling.’” 
“That’s different.” 
“How so?”
If he were still alive, you’d be able to feel his body heat as he stepped closer to you. He looked up towards the sky and moved his hands around as if searching for the correct words. 
“‘Darling’ has always been a lovely blanket term of endearment for victims whose names I didn’t bother to learn but needed to entice.”
You stiffened, thrown off by his honest answer. “Oh.” He met your eye. “People like feeling seen, and ‘darling’ does the job quite nicely. Call it a habit now, I suppose.”
You smirked at him. “You know my name, right?”
He smiled sideways in return. “Who are you again?”
“Good answer.”
“Honestly though, darling,” he said, before shaking his head and saying your name instead. “‘Darling’ isn’t anything special to me, that’s true,” he placed his hands firmly on your upper arms, just below your shoulders, “but you are.”
You exhaled a shaky breath, trying but failing not to shrink under his intense gaze. “Another good answer.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “Look at me, please.” 
You met his eye again and saw his features soften. 
“I’ve never called someone ‘beautiful’ and not meant it.”
You raised a disbelieving eyebrow. “Really. In all the times you had to seduce people, you never called someone you weren’t attracted to ‘beautiful’ just to make things go faster?”
Astarion rubbed absent minded circles into your arms with his thumbs. “In those instances, I preferred referring to them as, ‘striking.’”
You snorted. “You can’t be serious.”
“I could say ‘dead serious,’ but that would be atrocious, so I won’t.”
“‘Striking,’” you repeated, laughing a little at the vagueness of it. “I guess that could mean anything.”
Astarion nodded. “Exactly.” He shifted his hands up to your shoulders. “But you, my sweet, are exquisite.” 
You smiled shyly. “I could say ‘aw shucks,’ but then you’d kill me, so I won’t.”
He pushed himself away from you again. “You are infuriating.”
Dropping the books once more, you reached for his wrist as he backed away. “No, no, I’m sorry,” you said as you brought his hand to your mouth to kiss his knuckles. “Tell me more about how beautiful I am.”
He rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically before his features settled into a seductive grin. He reached forward and pulled you closer by the waist. His voice was low and flirtatious when he said, “I told you on that first night I had my way with you that you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.” He shifted his head to nip at your ear, “I meant that.”
A shiver went through your body and you closed your eyes. “Really?”
Astarion scoffed. “I wouldn’t willingly attach myself to just anyone, darling.” He kissed your neck. “For one thing, there’s this gorgeous neck of yours.”
You let out an amused sigh. “Go on…”
“Your eyes,” he said, shifting up to bear his crimson gaze into yours, “they sparkle like anything. I can’t say I’ve ever seen eyes more lovely.” You blinked at him, unsure of what to say. He continued, “Especially when you’re laughing. Preferably at something clever I’ve said.”
That made you laugh. “You’re not always as clever as you think.”
He smiled back at you. “So long as I keep seeing that dazzling smile, I shall make a fool of myself.” After a beat, he clarified, “But only for you.”
If you weren’t careful, you might cry. “You sweet, stupid man.”
“Speaking of that smile; that mouth of yours. I could eat you right up.” 
He bent to kiss you deeply but you pulled away to giggle. “And you have!”
“And I have,” he agreed, succeeding in kissing you this time. 
Your mouth moved against his slowly, keeping in time with him, and you brought your arms up to wrap around his neck. As the kiss became more intense, his tongue licking into your mouth, your heart picked up speed, which sent Astarion groaning against your lips.
“That delicious heartbeat,” he said dreamily, breaking the kiss. “It’s as sweet as any song you’ve ever played, my love.”
Your eyes shot open as he brought his face down to your throat again to kiss your pulse point. Based on his body language and the sensual way he continually kissed your neck, you had a feeling he didn’t realize what he’d said. He kept talking.
“Your heartbeat means you're alive,” he placed a kiss on your collarbone. “And that you’re here,” a kiss to your chest. “With me,” a kiss atop your clothed left breast, above your pounding heart. “Not to mention it’s the source of my favorite meal,” he pulled back to look at you with a goofy grin that he quickly morphed into one of seduction. When he saw your bewildered expression, his face fell into one of concern. “What is it?”
You shook your head and blinked rapidly, attempting to keep your composure. “Astarion,” you said, your voice full of adoration, “there’s something I need to tell you.”
“What’s wrong?” His tone was instantly serious and stern. “Did something happen?” He inspected your right side as if you may have started bleeding again. 
Laughter bubbled out of your chest at his sudden shift in demeanor. This man cared for you so deeply it almost hurt. And it was so blatantly obvious to everyone but himself.
“There’s nothing wrong, dummy,” you said, tapping the tip of his nose to bring his attention back to you. 
He looked at you questioningly and saw nothing but affection in your eyes. “Then…” he leaned in closer, drawn in by the softness of your features, “what is it?”
You leaned in as well, watching his mouth and subconsciously wetting your lips in preparation for what you were about to say. “I…” you eyes began to close, “lo-”
“Tsk'va!”
You and Astarion froze, your mouths inches apart. 
“That wasn’t you, was it?” he muttered. 
You narrowed your eyes at him, swatting his cheek lightly and pulling away.
Lae’zel was standing not too far off, covered in blood, staring at the two of you with an intense ire that had you both nearly jumping away from each other. “You feeble wretches are delighting in intercourse whilst the Lich Queen lies to her kin about purification and I nearly lose my life as a result.” Astarion straightened and looked at his nails, bored. “Oh, is that all?”
You gave him a look before stepping forward to offer comfort. “What happened?”
Lae’zel looked between you and Astarion before furrowing her brows and marching off to her tent. “She may yet purify me!” she called angrily, sounding like she was trying to convince herself more than anyone.
The rest of your party stumbled into camp not far behind. They, too, were drenched in blood and looking worse for wear. You approached them immediately, Astarion reluctantly on your heels. 
“Is everyone okay?” you quickly looked over everyone and didn’t note any major injuries.
“We’re alright,” Wyll assured and nodded to Shadowheart, “no thanks to Shadowheart.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” she groaned. “Let’s see if we survive the night.” She gestured towards Lae’zel who was angrily shedding her armor and shrieking frustratedly with each discarded piece.
You looked back at the others and repeated, “What happened?”
“Our little dream visitor had some rather enlightening news for our githyanki friend,” Gale sighed, wiping his brow. 
“Well hang on now,” Karlach said. “Her people, or rather, some random lady doctor, tried to kill her first!”
Wyll nodded solemnly. “Not to mention that fearsome god of hers threatened our lives.”
You inhaled sharply. Even Astarion looked surprised. “What?”
“Why do the gods favor you people?” Astarion crossed his arms. “They never answered me when I called.”
“Now, now, Astarion,” Gale said, “this was not a meeting on the most benevolent of terms.”
Astarion rolled his eyes. “So were you able to kill her or something? Is that why you’re all drenched in what smells like an absurd amount of gith blood?”
“Kill a god?” Wyll laughed lightly. “Be serious, Astarion.”
The vampire shrugged. “I don’t know what you lot are capable of, we just met.”
“‘Just met?!’” Shadowheart scoffed incredulously. “And you think you could have taken on a god? You and what? Those sharp teeth of yours?”
“If you’d like to see what they’re capable of, darling, you need only ask.” He flashed her a malicious grin. 
“Astarion,” you caught his eye and shook your head slightly. 
“If killing that overgrown creep were an option, I gladly would have taken it,” Karlach punched at her open palm. “I can’t stand bullies.”
Halsin now entered the fray. “Peace,” he said calmly. “Everyone should get cleaned up and inspected for injuries, then we can discuss the events of the créche.”
You turned to look for Lae’zel, but her tent was empty. You assumed she’d gotten a jumpstart on the cleaning process. 
“Why is my book in the dirt?!” Shadowheart exclaimed. “Astarion!”
“I think it’s time I go for a hunt,” Astarion kissed you swiftly. “You can handle this, can’t you darling?” Then he took off at a brisk pace down the side of the mountain. 
~~~~~
After Lae’zel and the others had cleaned themselves up and bandaged their shallow wounds, you’d all sat around the fire to discuss what had occurred at the crèche and what the dream visitor had told Lae’zel of Vlaakith’s deception towards the purification process.
That night, Kith’rak Voss and his group of rebel githyanki warriors had visited you and your companions, telling you all that the Astral Prism held the key to Vlaakith’s undoing. He’d also promised to explain more and provide help once you reached Baldur’s Gate. 
“Why must they always be so cryptic,” Astarion had muttered to you from where you stood behind Lae’zel, allowing her to take the lead on this. “If the Prism is a source of unnamed power, then I think we have a right to know about it.” He pouted and you elbowed him lightly. 
As you were preparing to leave for the Shadow Cursed Lands the next day, Elminster appeared, bearing a message for Gale from Mystra. 
“Don’t be ridiculous,” you’d steamed after the old wizard left, “you’re not blowing yourself up, Gale. I won’t let you.”
“She’s right,” Astarion agreed. You turned and gave him a surprised look. He shrugged. “Sacrificing Gale to the Absolute is a waste of a perfectly good cult we could be controlling.” When you rolled your eyes, he amended, “And a waste of a perfectly good Gale, I suppose.”
“I am touched, Astarion,” Gale said before turning his attention back on you. “Let’s save such certainty about my fate for the moment such a decision is upon us. You may feel differently, once we know what we’re truly up against.” 
Thus your party kept packing up in preparation to leave for the Shadow Cursed Lands, which Halsin had discovered an entrance to, not far from your camp. 
Upon entering, the suffocating nature of the dark hit you instantly, and you felt a shift in your party the more you shuffled into the area. 
Astarion held out an arm to stop you from going any further, away from the lit fire you’d found near the entrance. “Can you feel that?” 
“You mean the impending sense of doom?” Karlach asked. “Yeah, I feel it.”
Astarion ignored her. “The dark, it’s… hungry. Best watch the shadows.”
Lae’zel scoffed. “How can darkness feel anything, let alone require sustenance?”
“That’s not-” Astarion sighed. “Oh, nevermind. Just… stay close to the light.”
“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Wyll said, grabbing a torch from the lit fire near the entrance. 
Shadowheart gazed into the distance, straining her eyes to see into the dark. “This place… there’s power in these shadows, I can sense it.”
Astarion snorted. “Shadowheart feeling one with the shadows. A little on the nose there, darling.”
Shadowheart shot him a deathly glare that had him look over at you for protection. You patted his shoulder in response.
“She’s right, though,” Gale agreed. “I’ve never seen such a concentration of shadow magic. We must forge on, but carefully. It will corrupt any who lack the power to control it.”
“Best get a move on, then,” Halsin siad, grabbing a torch in one hand and your party’s ox cart with the other. 
Wyll took the lead with his torch, while the rest of you grabbed your own. You and Astarion brought up the rear as you all made your way through the darkness. He was uncharacteristically quiet as you went. 
“Everything okay?” you asked him quietly, making sure the others wouldn’t be able to hear you. 
Astarion’s eyes were darting around, on high alert, but he looked over at you when you reached for his free hand with your own. “It feels like we’re being watched,” he said, returning his eyes to scanning your surroundings. “Hunted, even. But there’s nothing out there,” he looked in your direction but was focusing on the darkness behind you, “only more darkness.”
You nodded, and joined him in scanning the surrounding area. 
“I much prefer it when I’m the one prowling in the shadows, about to strike.”
“Ooh,” you said, shaking your voice as if telling a scary story, “scaaaary.”
Astarion looked at you with a scowl that you could see was concealing a laugh. “Sorry, did you want something?” He stepped closer to you, bringing his face inches away from yours. “Or just looking for a distraction?” He looked down at your lips. 
“I-” you looked at his lips as well and watched as his mouth formed into a grin. 
“Look alive, lovebirds,” Karlach turned back to face you two. “Movement up ahead.”
Instinctively, Astarion pulled you to him, shielding your right side with his body from possible attacks.
It was then that your party came across a group of Absolute worshippers, seeking passage across the Shadow Cursed Lands to Moonrise Towers with the help of a drider named Kar’niss, who brandished a magical lantern of some kind. You all played along, brandishing your True Soul statuses in order to gain favor and join the cultists on their journey deeper into the shadows. You even offered to play the Spider's Lyre, which Wyll had found and given to you in the Underdark, in order to summon the drider. 
Astarion made it a point of keeping you close, despite the cultists giving you no trouble.
“I’m fine,” you murmured, bumping his hip with your own.
He scoffed. “Oh, so you trust the arachnid is totally sane and won’t turn on us at any given moment?”
“Well-” He made a good point. While Kar’niss had done nothing to prove he was an imminent danger to you, his words were erratic and he’d snapped at you earlier for offering to carry his lantern.
“Wait…” Kar’niss hissed suddenly, holding his lantern aloft in front of what appeared to be a long abandoned house. “Something’s wrong, Majesty.”
“He’s right,” Astarion said quietly, drawing his daggers, “I can sense blood pumping in that building.”
“Should we do something?” Wyll asked.
“Shhh,” Shadowheart hushed. “We don’t know where they are, exactly. Do you want them to spring out at us while they still have the element of surprise?”
“Not particularly,” said Wyll, just as Lae’zel said “Yes,” and drew her greatsword from her back.
“Who’s there?” Kar’niss called. “Show yourself!”
From within the house came a male voice, shouting, “Harpers, attack!” 
“Harpers?” Karlach repeated.
The man continued yelling orders. “Kill the cultists… and get that lantern!”
“HERETICS!” Kar’niss shrieked. “VILLAINS IN THE DARK!”
“Soldier,” Karlach turned to you, a frantic look in her eyes, “Those are Harpers!”
Your own eyes widened. Harpers were known for protecting the innocent from evils across the realms. It made sense why they would want to attack cultists of the Absolute. 
“Wait!” you shouted and ran forward as Astarion called your name, trying to stop you. “We can help!” You spoke to the man leading this gang of Harpers.
The man looked you up and down as Astarion approached you with his knives still drawn, ready to pounce. “Hurt her, and you die,” he growled, dropping into a low stance.
You exhaled. “Sorry about the guard dog.”
“Careful,” Astarion said lowly, “I bite.” He gnashed his teeth at the group of Harpers surveying you closely. 
A woman with long curly hair stepped forward. “Prove we can trust you.”
You nodded and took your lute off your back,strumming a quick tune that had the deep purple magic of Shatter sparking at your fingertips. You turned back towards the cultists, who were now sandwiched between the Harpers and your party. You friends took the hint and drew their own weapons. 
“What are they doing?” Kar’niss eclaimed. “We thought they were True Souls! Traitors! Heathens!”
“Darling, are you sure about this?” Astarion asked, watching you carefully, checking for any signs that you weren’t ready to fight. 
You looked over at him and winked, casting a powerful Shatter that sent the cultists flying in every direction. 
The battle that followed was thankfully not as bad as it could have been, thanks to the help from the Harpers. Astarion had remained by your side the whole time, maneuvering the two of you out of the way whenever an attack landed closeby. He dutifully shielded your right side, stabbing the hobgoblin rather brutally when he lunged at you. 
When the battle ended and it was clear that no one had been injured too severely, you approached Kar’niss’ lantern and picked it up. Its chilly glow appeared to protect you all far better from the Shadow Curse than your long since discarded torches. 
The male Harper who you’d pleaded to at the start of the battle now approached you. “Incredible magic,” he said, indicating the lantern. “I can feel the light lifting the shadows - even those within me.”
Astarion laughed quietly at his remark, and you kicked the vampire in the shin. 
“Find us at the Last Light Inn,” the Harper said, pulling out a map and pointing to a small building by the river. 
“Thank you,” you said, marking the location on your own map.
“Be safe,” he said with a nod. “And be brave. We expect no less. Thank you for your help.” With that, he and his other Harpers made their way deeper into the shadows, accompanied by their own torches. 
“Could we not have gone with them?” Karlach asked.
“Probably had other Harperly duties to take care of,” Gale reasoned. 
“We should probably start heading that way anyway,” you said. “My magic’s depleted and I could use some sleep.”
“Agreed,” Halsin said, stretching his arms above his head and grabbing the ox cart once again. “It will be a relief to rest these weary bones upon a mattress for once.”
“Hmm,” Shadowheart mused, “is grass not cutting it for you anymore?”
“Far from it,” Halsin said. “But even I can appreciate the pleasures of a warm bed every once in a while.”
~~~~~
“Unfortunately, there is only one room available,” Jaheira said flatly when you all entered the inn and approached her at her desk.
Astarion scoffed. “Didn’t you just say outside that there were beds, plural, if we needed rest?” 
“It would seem I lied,” she said, looking through a book that you assumed showed current room assignments. “Oops.” She didn’t sound remorseful. “Looks like you’ll have to decide amongst yourselves who gets the room. The rest of you can make camp in the back. There’s plenty of room under Isobel’s light to keep you sheltered from the Curse.”
“Thank you, Jaheira!” Karlach said excitedly.
Jaheira smiled at Karlach’s enthusiasm and held out a goblet of wine to her. “Please,” she said, her tone suddenly very kind, “be welcome.” She handed a goblet to you as well. “Have a drink.”
“Oh my gods,” Karlach muttered, sharing an excited look with you. 
“To your very good health,” Jaheira said, raising her own cup towards all of you. 
Karlach was practically vibrating with excitement next to you. 
“You’ll have to excuse my friend, Karlach,” you said with a smile. “She’s very excited to meet you.”
She giggled, embarrassed. “Tsh. Yeah.” Her face fell just then, as if realizing she wasn’t being formal enough with her hero. She stooped into a low bow. “I mean… It's an honor. M’lady.”
“I will gladly drink to your health as well, Karlach.” Jaheira’s eyes sparkled with amusement. 
You raised your goblet to mimic Jaheira’s and went to take a sip, but were instead met with the back of Astarion’s hand. Your mouth crushed against his skin.
“You did not seriously just take a sip from a drink given to you by a stranger,” he said in horrified disbelief. 
“I was trying to,” you offered Jaheira an apologetic smile. “I wasn’t expecting to kiss the back of your hand,” you said through clenched teeth. 
Astarion took the goblet from you. “Give me that.”
Karlach had been just about to take a sip, but thought better of it and watched Astarion. 
He sniffed the contents of the goblet. “Klauthgrass,” he said with a wrinkle of his nose. 
“It doesn’t spoil the taste,” Jaheira offered, “if that’s what you’re wondering.”
Astarion rolled his eyes and shoved the goblet back into your hand, training his own hands above his sheathed daggers. “She’s trying to feed you a truth serum.”
“Astarion,” you said calmly, as if soothing a startled animal, “it’s okay.” You set the goblet down and reached for both of his hands, pulling them away from his daggers. “She just wants to protect her people. You can respect that, can’t you, my love?”
“Ah,” Jaheira nodded. “‘My love.’ It is admirable that the cub wants to protect his mate.” 
“She’s not-” Astarion sputtered. “We’re just-” He groaned loudly. “I don’t trust you,” he pointed an accusatory finger at the Harper. 
“Oh no,” her tone was flat again. “How ever shall I sleep tonight.”
Before Astarion could protest more, you took a sip of the drink. 
He gasped. “Darling, what do you think you’re doing?”
“Building trust,” you said, smiling at Jaheira.
Her features echoed your own and she took a sip as well. 
“Ah, what the hells,” Karlach said. “Bottoms up!” She downed her own goblet.
“You’re all idiots and I hope you die,” Astarion crossed his arms. 
Shadowheart laughed. “Isn’t the whole reason you’re being so dramatic because your mate almost died?”
“Watch yourself, cleric,” his words were icy, but Shadowheart couldn’t contain her snort.
Jaheira took another sip. “Well over a century old and yet it hasn’t lost a hint of its flavor.”
“Let’s have a taste, then,” Wyll pushed his way forward and took the goblet from you.
“I must see for myself if Astarion’s suspicions are warranted,” Lae’zel took Karlach’s goblet, “and if the wine is as good as this woman says.”
“No, no,” Astarion said sarcastically, “let’s all partake in the poison! Shadowheart? Gale? Halsin? What’s stopping you?”
Shadowheart crossed her arms. “I’ve packed my own wine that I don’t plan on sharing with you all, thank you very much.”
Gale, meanwhile, appeared to be reading a book he’d found discarded somewhere in the bar. “Pardon? Is something the matter?”
Astarion rolled his eyes and turned to Halsin who held up his hands in surrender.
“I rarely imbibe, the stuff goes right to my head. I doubt anyone wants to see that.”
“Mmm, yes, save it.” Astarion turned back to you and the others. “So we’re all going to tell the truth now, that’s great. Go ahead, Jaheira, ask away.”
“There’s an air about you,” she said, addressing you instead of the seething vampire to your right. “Something… alien.”
“Can’t imagine why,” Astarion muttered.
“Answer me true and do not lie,” she didn’t flinch when Astarion scoffed, and pressed on. “The parasite is changing you, isn’t it?”
You could feel the effects of the serum willing your mouth to form a truthful answer. You let it. “It’s trying to change me. To win me over. But I’m resisting its temptations.”
Jaheira looked you up and down. “And you’re certain you will continue to resist?” 
You nodded. “Yes.” The truth.
“Good,” you saw Jaheira’s shoulders relax. “I will take your word for it. And hold you to it, too.”
You looked over at Astarion, whose arms were still crossed. He scowled at Jaheira who turned to address him this time.
“I have every reason to be cautious.” She exhaled a frustrated sigh. “I’ve traced people like you.”
“Oh, have you.” Astarion rolled his eyes for what was likely the tenth time this evening.
Jaheira tilted her head. “People with parasites in their brains. All the way here from Baldur’s Gate.”
“A long journey, indeed,” Gale said.
Astarion laughed humorlessly. “Good of you to finally join us, Gale.”
Wyll cleared his throat. “And what of the city?” 
Jaheira turned to him this time. “The cult of the Absolute is spreading through the Gate. Quietly, quickly, and with unsettling deliberation.” 
“Gods…” Wyll breathed. “My father…” Gale patted his arm reassuringly.
“We tracked them to this ancient village,” Jaheira looked down at a map in front of her displaying the entirety of the Shadow Cursed Lands, and pointed to a village not far off, “only to be faced with a man we killed and buried over a century ago.” 
“Who was - is - he?” you asked, furrowing your brow. 
Jaheira paused briefly when she saw Karlach yawn. “General Ketheric Thorm. Remember that name. He’s the leader of the Absolutists.”
“How can we help?” you stepped forward, determined.
“Ugh,” Astarion pinched the bridge of his nose. “Really, my sweet, is now the time to be playing hero?”
“The vampire is right,” said Jaheira. “We can save this discussion for the morning.”
“Vampire?” Astarion repeated, laughing lightly. “What do you- I’m not-” he slumped. “What gave it away?”
She smirked. “Nearly everything about you. And I have experience with your kind.”
You and your companions snickered, and Astarion shot you all death glares. 
“Yes well… it’s been such a delight chatting with you, Jaheira, but I think now’s the time to discuss the room situation.” Astarion turned around so that his back faced Jaheira, effectively cutting her out of the conversation. 
She laughed. “When you decide who gets the room, it’s next to the bar, on the right.” Just as she was about to leave and take care of other matters, she turned back. “Do keep it down if it’s you two who get the room,” she gestured to you and Astarion. “The walls aren’t as thick here as you think they are. Those sitting around the bar will hear you and tell me all about it and I’d… prefer to remain in the dark if it’s all the same to you.”
“Jaheira!” Astarion scoffed. “What do you think of me?”
“Prove me wrong, vampling,” she winked at you and went on her way.
Shadowheart placed her hands on her hips. “Go on, Astarion. Make a case for why the two of you are in desperate need of the room.”
Astarion looked at his nails. “Well, darling, it’s just that we’ve had such little time to ourselves-”
Halsin interrupted. “I’m… going to set up camp outside. I yield my claim to the room and will gladly sleep under the stars. Or… I suppose there are no stars here. Regardless-” he turned on his heel and walked out the front door to reunite with your ox cart full of camp supplies.
“I’ll join him,” said Wyll.
“Right behind you,” Karlach agreed.
“Okay,” Gale looked around at those remaining. “That leaves four of us, considering you two as a unit.” He pointed between you and Astarion, the latter of which looked offended, but you grabbed his hand and squeezed it before he had a chance to argue.
Lae’zel adjusted her greatsword in her arms. “It is tradition among githyanki that those who performed best in battle should have the most comfortable sleeping chambers.”
Gale furrowed his brow. “Is that true? I’ve yet to read anything about that in my extended research on the githyanki people.”
Lae’zel shrugged.
Shadowheart spoke next. “It’s just that I drained so much of my magic healing everyone on the battlefield today. I think I deserve to sleep in comfort to replenish my power since we have no clue what tomorrow brings.” Then she quickly added, “Since we’re in her domain, I’d say it’s as if Lady Shar herself wills it.”
Astarion snorted. “Like hells she does.” He turned to Gale. “And what’s your excuse?”
“The knees,” Gale said, bending his knees for you all to hear an audible crack. “Too many nights on the ground will do no favors for one’s aching joints.”
You could see where this was going. There would be a constant back and forth until a loud argument inevitably broke out in the middle of the inn. You knew it was a bit devious, but you decided to get the jumpstart on ending the argument. 
You took Astarion’s hand. “Come on, Astarion,” you said with a sigh, “we can rough it outside for another night.”
He didn’t budge. “You can’t be serious, darling.”
“I am serious- Oh.” you paused in trying to get Astarion to follow you and reached for your right side. “Ow,” you said slowly.
Astarion said your name, his voice laced with worry.
“Oh gods,” you blinked your eyes several times, tears filling your vision.
“Tell me what’s wrong,” Astarion brushed hair out of your face and placed his hands on your cheeks. 
“I don’t know,” you said shakily. “I suddenly got a sharp pain in my side. I think my wound may have opened again.” 
“Oh for gods’ sakes,” Shadowheart rolled her eyes and held out her hand to scan you for injuries with her magic. “You know what, if it’s that important to you, you can have it.” With that, she left after the others.
“Are you alright?” Gale asked. 
“I know what would make her feel better,” Astarion said, catching on to your ruse. 
“Do not say the room,” Lae’zel glowered at him.
“The room,” Astarion said anyway. 
“Chk,” she spat. “Fine. Have your precious alone time. But when they kick you out for pleasuring each other too loudly, I get the room in your stead.”
“Uh… if that’s the case, she can have it after you two.” Gale smiled painfully. “I shall concede as well. If only so I can grab some shut eye without your loud-”
“Ooowww,” you moaned.
“Good gods, man!” Astarion exclaimed, clutching you to his chest as if you were made of glass. “How can you think of sex at a time like this! My precious treasure is wounded!”
“I mean, Lae’zel alluded to it first-” Gale pointed to where Lae’zel had been standing, only to see that she had already left. “Ah. I guess I’ll take my leave as well.”
“Ow! Gods, it hurts!” you wailed. “Get out of here!” Astarion practically yelled at the wizard.
Gale sighed. “Goodnight you two.”
“Goodnight Gale!” you called after him sweetly.
When he turned back to look at you, you were limp in Astarion’s arms, one of your own arms thrown dramatically over your eyes.
“Now look what you’ve done!” It was Astarion’s turn to wail. 
“Alright!” Gale turned and held up his hands in frustration. “I’m going!”
When he was finally gone, Astarion pulled you into him for a long, passionate kiss. “You are the perfect woman,” he breathed, resting his forehead against yours. 
“I’ll have to remind you of that the next time I annoy you,” you laughed and took his hand, leading him to the room.
Jaheira’s voice sounded from the second floor, “I would appreciate it if you did not yell while my Harpers and our guests are trying to sleep.” Despite her stern tone, her expression revealed mild amusement. 
“Sorry, Jaheira,” you whispered loud enough for her to hear you from the railing she bent over. 
“Good night, cubs.” She waved her hand and left you and Astarion to settle into your room.
~~~~~
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Unfortunately tumblr thought this piece was too long (WHOOPS!) so I had to split it into two parts. The second part can be found here.
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sskk-manifesto · 4 months ago
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Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me
#bsd#bungou stray dogs#About: Dead Apple. Watched this a while ago with a friend and it was a lot of fun!!!#If you're reading this: thank you so much for hanging out with me I had such a good time (ㅅ´ ˘ )♡#Next to general considerations: wow they were right that Bungou Stray Dogs movie sure can Bungou Stray Dogs#It's always nice to see the detailed animation and elaborate backgrounds of movies. The animation quality compared to the manga is–#definitely noticeable and it's nice to see. That said... I still like the season 2 art style more? And I'm speaking strictly of art style.#The s2 one looks more soft and smooth while the da one is so much more rough.#The plot is... Very bsd-esque I don't think there's anything to add.#In my opinion Kyouka's arc is the one that turned out best tbh. I really like her narrative development and personal growth in this movie.#I like the complexity of her state of mind. how full of contradiction she is. I especially appreciate the recurring small changes of–#expression that indicate how she thinks differently from Atsushi even if she doesn't voice them. The fight between her cynicism and her–#kind nature. It's all very interesting.#Atsushi's development is interesting too. Although all the open questions about his ability we still have kind of leave me frustrated#I don't feel very strongly about Akutagawa in this movie? I mean‚ he's there. The ss/kk scenes are always great and in character and a joy–#to witness no matter what they do. He just doesn't shine particularly? Or at least personally I dont find the “proving my strength against–#myself” narrative arc to be particularly interesting. Imo it was a lot better flashed out in the da stage play! With the complexity that–#the dialogues with Chuuya added to the character. Dazai attacking him. And especially Aktgw understanding that Rashomon wasn't testing Aktg#but rather only expressing that unstoppable rage that is also Aktgw's own. About that I checked out the play and I really liked it!!#I only watched highlights (aka: ss/kk and chuu/aku scenes) but there's some stuff I really like. I like the conflict between Aktgw and–#Chuuya and how Chuuya messes up with Aktgw at first maliciously and then amiably. It's interesting how Atsushi himself observes that Kyouka#and Akutagawa get along. And especially the sskk almost-handholding and Atsushi saying Akutagawa has a nice profile were cute akjdhbsawhjb#Next. Da really is shipping paradise (╥﹏╥) Sorry but... It is. oda/zai. daz/atsu. ss/kk. s/kk. fuku/mori. chuu/aku. It really has everythin#and the moments are so good!!!! What else. Wish we'd see more of Tsujimura. And Christie. And women in general tbh.#Also‚‚‚‚‚ Atsushi's tiger form in this movie is ATROCIOUS. I've said it before but it's crazy how a franchises that relies so heavily on–#fanservice came up with something this hideous. Man the movie overall was pretty but Atsushi sure wasn't. Firmly stand by the belief–#that only Akutagawa would find that form attractive.#Oh last note. honestly if we're ready to accept a movie where an antidote has effect AFTER the person has effectively died then we really–#can't complain about any kind of insanity the manga brings up#random rambles
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pokimoko · 4 months ago
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Hello!! i just discovered your blog and firstly i wanna say that your art is gorgeous! <33 and secondly, if youre still taking requests could i get a lesbian/non binary cheetah? /nf
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Thank you! Cheetahs be upon ye!
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meownotgood · 5 months ago
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I finished the rough draft for the second chapter of the prince aki fic, and I'm working on the outline for the third chapter 🫡
the third chapter consists of a couple seperate scenes, so I think it'll be quite long and take a bit to make 😭 I'll work on it as much as I can, and have the second chapter ready for you by next week 🫡
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flowingredscale · 1 month ago
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i know most of u follow me for reasons entirely unrelated to my fics and ao3 and stuff but Man i am really debating either not posting anymore or taking down my stuff. idk its just like. rahhhh
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sysig · 7 months ago
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Reading moodboard #84430940 (Patreon)
#Doodles#I wonder what this is in reference to lol - could be anything really!#Bit funny actually - I was reading something else in overlap at the time - a fic from another fandom though it ended up not being for me#Different authors just speak to different people! It was fun to come back to something familiar and realize Just how much I appreciate it ah#Novel and familiar! My very favourite <3 And of course it was a wonderful experience on top of that hehe ♪♫#Numbers lol - I really have done way too much age headcanon math pfft#I just love timelines! And even if the hints aren't exact they /are/ hints and I'm going to use them!!#The numbers that are established are such fun markers - and using characterization as hints towards how many years have passed! Ah! ♪#Like how it's definitely possible that Max took a two year but considering his family he was probably pushed to do a four year#There's no confirmation either way but it's just so fun to consider what they'd do based on how they're written!#These are the kind of written math problems I enjoy hehe#I was being a bit self-deprecating for that doodle actually tho lol - art mimics life and all that pfft#Also confirmation of him being a Lit Major ❤️💕💖💞💗 Small details give me big love you must understand this lol#As evidenced lol ♪ Adding to my playlist definitely didn't help it very strongly upgraded to Big Love for like a week straight lol#Terrible ♪ Couldn't stand it <3 Genuinely painful ♫#Lol - ''finding'' more - it's what had my blood on fire! I'm so grateful for mirrors#Anyone who's been following me for a while knows I have this whole thing about Legacy and what you leave behind and the internet in general#That the internet is forever except when it's not - that plenty of things get deleted or lost etc. etc. and it makes me very sad :(#So seeing that there was an in-built preservation - it only saved Some things but anything saved is precious!! It made me very happy <3#And then finishing off 💔💕 Beautifully heartbreaking ah#Even skim-reading later made me cry again! It's deeply affecting hhh#Another experience I'm so happy to be able to have ♥ Another tally on the wall haha <3
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isekyaaa · 6 months ago
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I'm going to say again like I know it is really dumb to feel this way, but I finally put into words why I get so annoyed when people ask me for a part 2 to one of my works. Like I explained once to people that writing is a very slow and arduous task for me, but it's more than that?
Picture you are an artist working on a painting. You spend months on it to get everything just right. You pour time and energy into getting the perfect composition, the perfect lighting, the perfect shades etc. And then finally, you finish it. After a year, you finally finished your masterpiece. And your work is a hit. People really like it. But then.... Someone comes up to you and says, "Gosh, I really love this painting! But you know what? I love it so much that I think the painting is much too small. You know what? You should add on two extra feet of canvas onto the right side of your painting. That way, you can add on more to your painting and it'll be even bigger and more enjoyable!"
To me, that's what it feels like when someone asks for a part two. Like this last fic honest to God I started on more than a year ago. Granted, I'd pick it up and put it back down, but I put a lot of work into making sure everything was as perfect as possible. It's not an amazing fic, mind you, but it still gave me a lot of trouble. But eventually I finished it into a COMPLETE work. It's a finished painting. That's the story I wanted to tell in its entirety.
I get why people want a part two. I get that the story ends to leave you wanting to know what happens next. But that's the point. That's the story I wanted to tell. It's complete. This isn't supposed to be pure romance. It's supposed to be more on the comedic side. But when people ask for a part two, it's like they're telling me that they're not satisfied with my artwork, that it's not perfect and needs more work for it to become perfect. It's like they're ignoring all the year's worth of effort I put into making sure the composition, wording, humor, etc was just right. Not only that. I should put another year's worth of work into making it truly perfect. It's insulting and exhausting.
Granted, like I said, I do understand people completely do not intend to make me feel this way. I'm not irritated with these people directly. I know it's supposed to be a compliment. But like.... Maybe it's because I'm prideful but I really can't help but be insulted. It's telling me that I didn't do a good job as a writer.
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firefly-jars · 8 months ago
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hi guys. amethio outfit board
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obstinaterixatrix · 2 years ago
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the thing about story mediums is that I don’t consider myself having ‘control’ per se over the best medium for a story. if it comes out better in writing that’s how it’s meant to be, if it comes out better in visuals that’s how it’s meant to be. sometimes there’s overlap like drawing comics or writing scenes but there’s A Reason it ends up one way or another. that’s just how the story comes out.
#writing ramble#like night flowers had to be a novella#there was one person who was like ‘this would be great as a comic!!! you could totally do it!!!!’#and like. I appreciate the energy but it’s not meant to be a comic.#if it was meant to be a comic it would’ve been a comic.#and I don’t even mean in the *~mysterious whims of the craft~* way#1) ljh is a character who is reserved in dialogue and expression#so having prose is helpful for adding to her character through over the shoulder 3rd person pov#what she noticed and where her internal logic takes her#2) this provided a strong contrast to xj’s internal narration#3) the framing device of the prologue and the epilogue (implied to be yp) is stronger through prose rather than visials#the only alternate medium I would accept for night flowers. is a musical.#I am being entirely serious.#and I have specific reasons for that too.#anyway this is partially because someone left a tag about how they’d read a novel of ol isekai which I know is intended as a compliment#but like night flowers. it is what the way it is because the story is more effective in a visual format#(despite me not being. A Polished Manga Artist)#meihui is somewhat similar to ljh because they’re both more reserved#but because of their different characters and different situations meihui’s internal narration is easier to write as a monologue#and someone could argue that could work with first person light novel style writing#but the balance between writing the scene and meihui’s monologue would be way off#comedic beats too. night flowers has comedic beats that work well in prose. ol isekai has comedic beats that work well visually.#basically: IT’S LIKE THAT FOR A REASON!!!!!!#the only alternative I’d accept would be a visual novel#and like. if I was someone else I might be able to write it in a different medium in a satisfactory way#for anyone who might be going like ‘well I can think of how it’d work as a comic/a novel instead’#I’M NOT YOU!!!#DIFFERENT PEOPLE WILL TELL DIFFERENT STORIES!!!!#WRITE IT YOURSELF THEN!!!!!! ACCEPT MY PROCESS OR LEAVE ME ALONE#legit I’d prefer it if it did work better as a novel because I’m more comfortable writing than drawing
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oveliagirlhaditright · 1 year ago
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I forgot to mention that I saw the trailer for the new the The Hunger Games movie when I went and saw Blue Beetle (the prequel, you know?) and it does look really good (even though at first I was unsure about it). I'm probably for sure going to see it when it comes out. Though this will be the first time that I haven't read the book first... unless I do end up reading the book between now and then.
#friends how do we feel about the 'the ballad of songbirds and snakes' novel?#because for me personally. and a lot of people i know... i honestly preferred the hunger games movies more than the books (even though you#have to love and appreciate the books. of course. because without them there would be no films)#is it the same with the prequel?#though i also know that many fans prefer the books and hate the movies: thinking the movies left out too much and that kind of thing#but yeah. since i DID prefer the movies. and think there's a good chance it might be the same way again. i'm thinking i might just watch th#movie first or maybe not even read the book at all#even though i'm usually of the mind of always reading the book. of course. and usually first#i think my reasons for preferring the movies are as follows... i really hated katniss in the books. i'm sorry. but i did. but seeing her#brought to life with the way jennifer lawrence played her really made me love her#also. people complain about some things the movies left out. and i definitely get that. to each their own#but i personally love the things the movies ADDED! that we didn't get to see since we're stuck in katniss' pov. that i think just bettered#the stories so much#and some (surely not all) of the things that were left out that people complained about i feel like aren't THAT needed?#like they didn't explain the avoxes#but i also feel like if you're smart you can clearly figure out what the capitol did to them#idk. this is just my opinion of course. anyone is free to disagree#but i say all as this as someone who isn't SUPER into the hunger games#i only read the books once. years ago. and i haven't seen the movies in a while. so i'm sure there are things i may have forgotten and migh#be getting wrong here#oh! another thing too is that i've seen people mention that they felt like suzanne collins' writing style with thg is almost script-like.#even though it's not a script of course#and that that might be another reason that i. and so many others prefer them as movies#because it was almost like she was writing the books TO be made into movies
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iliveinprocrasti-nationn · 2 years ago
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i don’t like. the irrationality created by memories
#ive spent enough time pouring over information and reading studies and making sure i know damn well how this disease works so that at least#it’s not some unknown enemy and becomes something i can understand#which is fine until im crying and shaking in my bathroom over it potentially being in this damn house once again and at this time of the#year where specific anniversaries of horrible milestones come back to haunt me#and i haven’t been fully present in going on two years now but these last two days have passed obnoxiously quickly and none of it feels real#it’s been a long time since i haven’t known the hour much less what day it is#and i can tell you about blood vessels and symptoms and all the ways this disease can function in and destroy the body but it doesn’t make#any difference when nothing feels real and i had to check what day it was and got the date wrong for the first time in years#I’m also defaulting to hyper-rationality which hasn’t happened since middle school and isn’t. a good sign#it’s just a replay of a lot of memories i can’t forgot but this time it’s not just memories and has a very much physical component which is#worse. I think. by far.#and then there’s the repercussions of this where I have to see if my brain will allow me to anything#i can hope i can still go to work and everything because i do love it but last time this happened i wasn’t able to walk into any building#without having to leave#so. I don’t know. not to mention things that don’t have to do with school or careers?#and rationally i should be asleep at the moment because sleep is so so necessary right now but that’s the one thing I’m really struggling#with right now#i don’t know. it’s just a lot and I don’t appreciate the added layer of ‘time is a circle’#there’s other things I have to deal with and work through that are more irrational than research vs trauma response but will probably be#harder to work through because man does my brain love latching onto a grudge but. for lack of a better term. whatever#im most upset about things pertaining to a career has been messed up and that i can’t celebrate chanukah with my family#because everyone else can think about christmas but im losing my winter holiday#im just. anything that isn’t empty is scared and angry and bitter just a little bit#vent tw
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squireofgeekdom · 2 months ago
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related to that last post it does fascinate me how much fic tagging culture has changed over time, ranging from no or minimal tags, to more expansive tagging, chatty tagging like tumblr, and now getting something that feels like a response to tagging on like, instagram or tiktok, 'tagging for visibility', being (further) misapplied to an archive setting. like, as someone who first read on specific fandom archives and forums that really didn't do tagging iirc, and first posted on ffnet with verrrrry minimal tagging (sure can't tag background ships on there!), even my own tagging on ao3 has evolved a great deal in the ~decade ive been on there. and then of course all of these fic tagging cultures exist simultaneously in different fandoms and from different circles of people based on preferences and norms that may have been established on social media or in print zines.
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arolesbianism · 4 months ago
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Alright boys pack it up no more rain world posting new oni dlc is coming out in less than a week
#rat rambles#oni posting#rain posting#I jest I will probably still be posing some rain world stuff if I get around to designing more guys#but I can already feel the oni brain coming back and am half tempted to do one last comb through the files even tho I know itll be#pointless because the full dlc will be at my fingertips very soon#to be clear I 100% will be combing through the data of the full release too but thats a given#calvin my boy pls make it in pls don't get scrapped pls my boy#oh now that we're getting close Im gonna let myself talk abt this just this once but if you care abt potential spoilers stop reading#anyways so last I checked where the duplicant descriptions and stuff is stored there was an additional new duplicant named calvin#now I wasnt able to find anything else referencing him from my admittedly not super deep digging but he was there#I did thoroughly look through the spritesheets tho and hes definitely not there from what I could yell#or at least he wasnt when I checked idk maybe they put him in during one of the patches for some reason#but yeah I hope he makes it in despite all the specific advertising of them adding one new duplicant#its actually these descriptors that have been making me not wanna talk abt calvin dupe too openly as if he does make it in its probably#going to be a pretty big spoiler for a bit?#ofc if he is a secret of sorts then he wont be for long but if he is meant to be a surprise I don't wanna scream on the rooftop abt it#but I do wanna have proof that I found him before hand it he is a surprise I need to feel cool and special for looking at one file <3#yknow what I think I actually am going to pop open oni and tripple check that I'm not missing anything#I was playing rw a lot to cope with the dlc not being fully out but at this point Ive finished every campaign except saints#and saints is being a buggy bastard for me rn and keeps repeatedly softlocking me so Im giving up on it for now#like just this morning I did the entirety of the hunter campaign in like 2 hours I have so little left to do#if I do decide to replay a campaign tho it's probably going to be either gourmands or spearmasters since theyre my favorites to play as#idc what anyone says Ill always preffer the spearmasters story to rivulets I adore them both but ppl do not appreciate spearmaster enough#like every person Ive seen play it sees the ending as disappointing and I wont stand for it its high-key my favorite ending#now thats entirely because Im a moon enjoyer and a tragedy enjoyer but still I will always lose my mind over moon's final message
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