#do what u gotta do to feed your kid

[thankchaosforspellcheck]

Okay but the:

[18!Leo is transmasc] -> [18!Leo lays eggs for his period because turtles] -> [the resistance now has a 3rd food option besides rats & leaves. it's eggs.]

is the FUNNIEST queer headcanon pipeline I have ever seen. never change rise fans. never change.

[gilverrwrites]

I love imaging Dick, Tim, and Damian sneaking around trying to meet Jasons new gf because they just wanna be involved in his life and they know if they they leave it to Jay they wont meet her u til they're married with kids 😭

AND ‘omg us meeting Jason’s siblings when’

AN: Ngl I love this idea too, its so shitty of them but they have the best of intentions.

Damian

A boy no older than 14 with eyes that pierce the soul was not what you'd expected to find on Jason's couch the very first time he'd left you alone there. Jason had to dip out unexpectedly early, and had promised you run of the place until he got back so you'd slept in as long as you could and were on your way to make breakfast when you're greeted by the hell-child.

Once your initial fright wears off you realise you recognize him from a photo Jay had showed you which makes you feel slightly more at ease.

“Good morning? Damian right?” You offer as you pass him, be-lining for the coffee machine, you're gonna need caffeine if you're meeting any member of Jay's family for the first time. “Can I get you anything?”

“Alfred says it's unbecoming to sleep past 9.” Besides the initial glare he'd graced you with as you emerged from the bedroom, he doesn't even look up at you, his eyes glued to the pages of a book. Like brother like brother, you guess.

“Oh, well. Good thing Alfreds not here then.” You add a small laugh, trying to inject some humour to the situation. Damian does not respond in kind. “Is that a no? I think there's some chocolate cereal around here somewhere.”

“What do you do for work that allows you to be in my brother's home in the middle of the day?”

Jeez this kid is no-nonsense. “Or I could make pancakes, I make really good pancakes.”

“And tell me what exactly are your intentions with my baby brother?” Baby?

“I think there's some chocolate chips around here somewhere. Jason says you like chocolate. Chocolate pancakes?”

“Do you always avoid questions?”

“Are you always so intense?”

He slams the book closed and you nearly jump on the spot. He finally looks at you, really looks at you and as you stare back his features begin to soften slightly.

“I’ll have a coffee.”

You're certain from the sly look on his face that he's probably not allowed coffee. He certainly doesn't need any. But screw it, he's not your kid and if it gets him to like a little, you'll take the risk.

So you pour two coffees and join him on the couch. His questions do not cease until Jason returns about an hour later. He couldn't care less about the coffee, but he does care about Damian breaking in to interrogate his partner and immediately kicks Damian out.

Dick

Dick finds out about your existence from one of Damian’s letters, and he's subtle but pushy about meeting you. Not that you're aware. He keeps ‘dropping by’ Jason's apartment ‘just to see his lil brother’, no other reason but is told to get lost or downright ignored anytime you're there, until he decides to cut out the middle man and turn up at your home instead.

“Let me tell you, you are a hard person to get a hold of.” He informs as he invites himself through your front door.

“Um, hello Dick?” As you stare at his lush hair and sculpted abs you wonder what Alfred feeds these boys.

“Yep! I can't stay so I’ve gotta make this quick.” he gestures for you to come closer, speaking in a playful, conspiratorial whisper. “Jay doesn't know I'm here.”

That would be why he can't stay, Jason is due at your door any minute now.

“But you two seem to be getting pretty serious and I think it's important that we all get to know each other. You following?”

You nod, and he gives you the perkiest, most genuine smile. That or he has that exact look practised to a T. From what Jay tells you, either is possible.

“So, Barbara and I, that's my wife” You nod once more, you're aware of Barbara also. “have booked a table at Casa Gotica for Thursday night. We need you to get Jason there without letting on that it's a double date.”

“I don’t know.” you finally give your nodding head a break. “Jay and I don’t lie to each other.”

“Right. I can't begrudge that. Very glad to hear he's picked an honest one.” He takes a moment to straighten his thoughts, but his moment is cut short but the echo of Jason’s combat boots approaching your door. Dick’s eyes rapidly scan the room for a secondary exit before he settles on an open window. “Don't think of it as lying, think of it as omitting the truth. Whatever you have to do just be there for 6.30. Oh, and it's great to meet you!”

“You too.”

“Thursday, 6.30!”

Before you can agree he’s gone, presumably scaling the side of your building as Jay steps inside.

Tim

Tim was actually the first to be aware of you and your relationship with his brother, however, the very real possibility of being gutted by Jason for snooping in his personal life was too high for him to make a move.

But you seeking him out is a different story; or rather, you being the first to say hi when you bump into each other in line at the grocery store is different. It would be rude not to respond to your attempts at initiating a conversation.

“Hello, hi, are you Tim? You don't know me but I’m Jasons partner. Its so great to meet you.”

“I know who you are.” He states rather ominously, eyes darting around behind you. “Is he here?”

“No, but he's picking me up after.” His shoulders visibly ease.

“Cool cool cool.” He’s suddenly much more personable. “So, I hear you're into…”

That chatting doesn't dry or lul at all as the queue dwindles and both buy your groceries. He waits with you until you get confirmation from Jay that he's on his way. He's easily the chillest sibling you've met thus far.

When Jason arrives he gets out of the car to open the boot and passenger door for you as always, but not before he thrusts his phone in your face. “Where is he?”

Displayed on the screen is a selfie of Tim with you in the background, you absolutely do not remember it being taken.

[norrisainz33]

Girl Dad || LS2

☆ summary: Logan’s longtime partner is a single parent and he absolutely loves being a girl dad

☆ pairing: logan sargeant x parent!reader

☆ fc & warnings: none and mentions of pregnancy

☆ requested: yes - changed it a little bit but hope you like! haven’t written about kids and family before so i did my best! thank you so very much for taking the time to request 🫶🏻

a/n: y/d/n = your daughters name

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

ynuser has made a post

liked by logansargeant, maxverstappen1, carmenmundt, georgerussell63, yourbff, williamsracing and 324,345 others

ynuser: family time with my favorite people! oh what i wouldn’t give for summer break to last forever 🤍

view all 253 comments

lilymhe: summer break is fun and all but i miss you and y/d/n 😫

ynuser: we miss you too lils

alex_albon: the break literally just started and you saw each other yesterday

lilymhe: wondering who it was that asked you?

user1: logie bear and his girls 🥹

user2: mother is mothering

user3: it can since ur man has no job

user4: i mean this with full disrespect- f u 🖕🏻

logansargeant: it could last forever if we moved to florida 😉

ynuser: you know i love you logan but i will not be moving to florida

yourbff: little lady is getting so big omg i have to visit soon

ynuser: yes pls come visit!!

user5: looking forward to all the logan dad content this break

logansargeant has made a post

liked by ynuser, williamsracing, alex_albon, oscarpiastri, maxvertsappen1, lilymhe, and 678,436 others

logansargeant: boo ya baby

view all 654 comments

user18: frat boy and dad logan all in one post im going to combust

user19: i love how he posts y/d/n more than y/n , he do be loving the honorary dad life

ynuser: cowabunga!

logansargeant: ❤️🏄‍♀️

williamsracing: hope you are enjoying summer break logan!

oscarpiastri: with what skills are you teaching y/d/n to surf?

logansargeant: i’ll have you know im quite good

ynuser: that is generous logan

user23: logan is so dilf coded this makes so much sense

user27: do we wanna take bets on how long it is till he proposes?

user44: gotta be before the end of the season. i’m thinking summer break is the perfect time

ynuser has made a post

liked by alex_albon, maxverstappen1, carmenmundt, logansargeant, williamsracing, and 345,657 others

ynuser: pictured: pretty princess logie bear treating his two girls right

view all 689 comments

user88: PRETTY PRINCESS LOGIE BEAR

user28: princess logan was not on my bingo card but i am so here for it

logansargeant: i love both of my pretty princesses so much

logansargeant: (i thought we agreed you wouldn’t post these pictures of me and y/d/n)

ynuser: but they’re just so cute 🥹

alex_albon: oh look at this big softie

ynuser: he’s the biggest softie

logansargeant: please i have an image to protect

alex_albon: no you don’t

oscarpiastri: ok twinkle toes

ynuser: don’t make me pull up the pictures of you at y/d/n’s tea party

oscarpiastri: uncle oscar will be quiet

landonorris: SIMP

logansargeant: guilty

user29: he’s not the step father,,, he’s the father who stepped up 🗣️

user13: they’re not even married

user29: YET user13 YET

user34: seeing logan with y/d/n is so healing. we stan a man who loves his kids (even if they’re not his kids just his beautiful partners kids)

logansargeant has posted to his story

view all story replies

user43: don’t mind me screaming my head off rn

user89: logan hunter sargeant the man that you are

landonorris: post anything other than y/n or y/d/n challenge failed

logansargeant: hey the second photo is just me!

ynuser: you have no business looking that good at the gym

logansargeant: sorry baby 😉

lilymhe: no matter how cute the pic is, socks with sandals is criminal

logansargeant: thanks for the feedback lily 😭

user42: i think these 2 pics might be the death of me

user46: thank you for feeding us papa sarge

ynuser has made a post

liked by yourbff, lilymhe, logansargeant, williamsracing, lilyzneimer, oscarpiastri, maxveratappen1 and 876,346 others

ynuser: y/d/n says she wants to drive logan’s f1 car one time and now he’s got her out here with her own kart. she’s a fast one tho just like her favorite guy 🤍

view all 456 comments

user33: project sargeant is a go

user55: honestly y/d/n could drive the williams f1 car.. it may as well be a tractor at this point

logansargeant: had to make sure my girl could follow her dreams!

ynuser: she does want to be just like you 🥹

user76: i am going to lay in the road this is so

lilymhe: i miss little my race car driver!! also im obsessed with her pink helmet

ynuser: we can’t wait to see you in a couple days🫶🏻

maxverstappen1: love to see it! if she needs any pointers, i’d be happy to help 😉

ynuser: you and p should come by! she misses you both (and the cats too)

maxverstappen1: when you’re in monaco next we will get together!

user56: this just in - y/d/n is arrow mclarens next driver!

user38: f1 academy’s newest star

logansargeant has made a post

liked by ynuser, alex_albon, williamsracing, oscarpiastri, yourbff, maxverstappen1, lilyzneimer, and 673,234 others

logansargeant: surprise! we’re getting married and we’re expecting! baby sargeant coming spring 2025. we love you so much already little one 🤍

view all 879 comments

user88: just fell to my knees in this walmart parking lot

user46: i’ve never been more happy for two people in my whole life

ynuser: can’t wait to be your wife and meet our little bundle of joy 🫶🏻

logansargeant: i could not be more excited 💙

lilymhe: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

ynuser: same

alex_albon: my two favorite people are going to get married and have a baby wow

ynuser: 🥹🥹🥹

user34: logan is already the best dad to y/d/n , ik he’s gonna be the best to this little one too 😭

user76: RAHHHHH BABY AMERICA 🇺🇸🦅🦅🇺🇸

oscarpiastri: congratulations you too. big love to you both 🧡

ynuser: we love you uncle oscar

logansargeant: thanks osc 💙

lilyzneimer: YAYY!!!! beyond excited for you both. love love love love you 🧡

ynuser: love you more ms maid of honor 🤍

user75: if y/nlogan have no fans then i am dead

user27: sargenation won with this. our boy is so happy and that’s all that matters

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thank you for reading!! working my way through my requests so please be patient. likes and reblogs appreciated 🫶🏻

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[fictionalmenxyn]

߷𝐭𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐬߷

Pairing: Chris x influencer!reader (established relationship)

Warnings: language, suggestive talking

-☺︎︎☺︎︎☺︎︎-

You had just arrived back at the LA house. Holding food bags from McDonalds. You went over to Matt’s room and dropped his food off. Realising the boys were on stream, but Chris was in his room.

You headed down to the bottom floor, Chris’ room. You knock on the door then open it.

Chris looks over and smiles “hey chat, my meal is here.” He smirks and made sure to hide his actual food from the camera. As you walks over and sat in the spare chair. Chat blew up.

‘OMG HEY Y/N!!’ ‘EW CHRIS U JUST CALL HER UR MEAL LOL’ ‘CHRIS NO AHAH 😂’ ‘y/n is not his food guys she went to McDonalds 😭’ ‘omg Y/n on stream with the boys’ ‘cuties!!!’

You smiled at the camera “hey guys, imma hop on stream with Chris and Matt.” Chris smiled and placed his meal out on the desk “chat should Y/n take over while I eat??” Matt joked “yeah, she better anyways.” Chris playfully gasped “absolutely not!!” You laughed. Taking the controller from Chris. You started to play Fortnite with Matt.

As you played, Chris watched and read chat as he ate. He’d giggle at some comments. He asked “hey chat?? Should I feed Y/n/n a nuggie??” You laughed. Chat obviously agreed. You joked “the fucking edits are gonna go wild…” he laughed “perfect!”

He held a nugget to your lips, you took a bite. Then he fed you the other half. You thanked him then handed over the controller as he was done eating.

You talked with everyone who was watching the stream as they played. Chris glanced over and chuckled “chats asking ass or tits…” Matt replied “personality, then heart..” Chris smirked “exactly…” you pulled a ‘ok, did he just agree to that’

Then Chris added “then ass.” You gasped “I was fucking waiting for that!!” You added “I was like ‘damn he really just agreed with Matt without saying that’s then you said it I was like ‘there it is’” you all laugh.

While Matt was doing something, you and Chris sat in his room waiting for Matt’s return.

Chris was eating a pack of sour patch kids. You stuck your index finger and thumb out. You give him the puppy dog eyes “can I have you?” He grinned “magic word??” “Please??” “It’s abracadabra!” He laughed hard. You laughed at him, thinking ‘how the fuck was it that funny??’ He held the pack out to you “here babe, since you sooo kindly said ‘please’ I guess I’ll let you have some.” You smiled “thank youuu”

You looked to the camera “see chat, this is what I gotta stick up with.” That earned a loud gasp from Chris “you did not!” He put his sour patch kids down and started play fighting with you.

Matt returned to his room, sitting back in his chair. “You guys ready for another round on here? Or we playin’ dress to impress???” No answer… “Chris? Y/n? Chat, what’re they doing??” He leaned closer to his screen and read chat. Spamming.

‘They’re play fighting again!!’

Matt chuckles, you get back into your seat again “Matt come get your fuggly ass brother” Chris playfully but definitely gently punched your arm. You punched his back “ow bitch! That hurt!” You giggled. “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up!” “Wa, wa, babe, too bad so sad.” Chris demanded “kiss it better!!” You laughed. Giving his shoulder a kiss.

After a while, you were now sat on his lap as you watched him and Matt play dress to impress. “No Chris get the mini skirt!!” “I’m getting there!!” You clapped when he put it on the avatar “fucking slay, hoe!” He smiled. You said “chat, rate fit outta ten!” Everyone spamming nines and tens.

As the ratings started, Chris wrapped his arms around your waist. Placing a few small kisses to your cheek and jaw. He smiled “foot outfit choice, baby” you smiled “what can I say, I’m just too good.” Matt and Chris laughed.

You lean back into Chris, resting your head on his shoulder. Staying like that for the rest of the stream. In between all the play fighting and grabbing snacks. He also gave you the occasional kisses and pecks. You were the official ‘chat reader’ as Chris put it. Reading out chat and talking to the viewers. Everyone loved you on stream with the guys while they played games all night.

-☺︎︎☺︎︎☺︎︎-

[caeunot]

johnnie guilbert x reader

➷ breeding kink plus some fluff :3

PSA: the johnnie ive written about is the fictional version we all have in our minds, we truly don't know how he actually is and it's good to make a balance to avoid any uneasy or parasocial feelings when writing about a real person.

you and johnnie have been dating for around three years and you already decided that he is the man you are going to marry, you two are both almost 30 now which is terrifying but it also is making your baby feaver worsen.

you have always wanted kids and johnnie knows that, he never was fully against it but he always looked a bit awkward when you two would talk about it.

johnnie also knows that you have an extreme breeding kink, which has led to a lot of roleplay in the bed but you feel it's time to do something a bit more official.

when one of your friends asked to babysit their 17 month old baby you agreed! one part because you love kids and other so that you can give yourself and johnnie (mainly johnnie) a feel for how it's like to be a parent.

"thanks so much you guys! we haven't had an actual break for so long we need this.", "it's our pleasure I promise we will take good care of lil jess". your friend passes her into your arms and johnnie bends down and pokes her arm. "hey jess! I'm Johnny and I'll help look after you for the next few days :D"

you start unpacking all the baby stuff like diapers the toys and milk, johnnie watches you in awe and for almost every item asks you questions about it. "and what about this?" he says pointing to a cream. "that's for diaper rashes! their bums are super sensitive so it's important to add after changing a diaper". " so u gotta like.. rub it on and stuff...".

you laugh at him and he laughs back, but his laughing stops when you mention how he will have to try change her a few times himself. eventually you two settle everything in and you teach him the basics like how to feed them and how to make the bottles.

"okay can u put in microwave for 20 seconds! she prefers it warm". johnnie put the bottle in and started staring intensively into the microwave, you can't help but let out a laugh by accident making your hand immediately smack your mouth. "okay what was that for!! I thought I was doing this properly.." you walk over to him and put your arms around his waist. "I laughed because you looked so cute doing it baby, I'd love to make you a dad"

that comment made him turn his head to the side as his face went a bit red, you remove your hands from his waist and use it to guide his face to yours and you two share a deep kiss.

that night after putting jess to sleep in her fold out crib you and johnnie cuddled on the bed while watching some tv when johnnie turns to face you, "do you think I'd make a good dad?". " johnnie are you kidding?! you would make an amazing dad! you have such an sweet nature and you are the perfect mix of playful and serious, baby your the blueprint for a perfect dad" he let out a big gummy smile after that and pulled you on top of him and you two start making out for awhile before falling asleep in each other's arms.

at the end of the weekend you two had learned a lot, you learned that johnnie actually is really good with playing with babies.. not so much the unfun stuff like diapers and spit but that's something you get used to over time. and johnnie learned that there was nothing more than he wanted at that moment than to make you a mom, the way you were to gentle and sweet to the baby and the way you knew exactly how to do everything with her. honestly he found it really hot. that's why that night after jess went back home he took your hand and started to gently lead you to the bedroom.

"johnnie you weirdo what are you doing!" you say jokingly as he closes the bedroom door and pushes you onto the bed. he leans over you and whispers in your ear, "im ready" knowing you would know exactly what he ment. you immediately reached for his face and you two share a deep kiss and slipped tongue, he picked you up slowly to push you further onto the bed and immediately took off his shirt and pants as you do the same.

he crawls towards you like a hungry animal, while sitting on your thighs he starts kissing your belly and slowly gets higher and higher till he's finally kissing your face. in between the kisses you moan out, "fuck me johnnie, fuck a baby into me". you could see how much those words did something to him because with no hesitation he immediately starts pulling down your panties, but instead of what you expected he slipped his hand in between your legs. he slipped 2 fingers in making you shudder and hold the sheets as he went back and forth inside of you before letting one finger out and using it to rub your clit slowly.. enough to where it's making you go crazy but not enough to orgasam just yet

after a few minutes he takes his soaking fingers out and licks them, "are you ready darling?" he asks you in a sweet whisper without actually giving you time to answer as he slips it in almost instantly

he starts grinding back on forth inside of you and leans forward to start kissing you and grabbing your boobs to keep him steady, after a little bit of him going slow you decided to speed things up by pushing up your hips making his dick go deeper inside you, taking him off guard he let out an accidental whimper. this was enough to make him go harder and faster.

and harder and faster he did

the whole bed was screeching as you two rocked it back and forth, you have never seen johnnie like this before, he normally is really sweet and gentle but this time he's being really rough, he's digging his nails into your back and leaving bite marks all over your chest.

"after this your all mine y/n.. this is me claiming you" and as he says that he moans and grips onto you harder and you feel his warm seed filling you.

when he took it out he immediately stuck his finger back inside to make sure you don't loose any of the baby batter he gave you.

❣

[wh0reforcoriolanussnow]

A/n: u guys r gonna have to imagine alot w these pics 😭 but i wrote whos supposed to be who so it makes a bit more sense!!!!! THIS ONLY MAKES SENSE IF YOU READ THE FIRST BIT

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by 3,308,252 people

Prepare for the ‘Anastasia’ photo dump 😈

view all comments

tomblyth: yummy cake 🍰😋

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: i'm craving it so bad rn 🤤

user1: THE MOVIE WAS SO GOOD WTAF

user2: Y/n and Tom's on screen chemistry is insane...

user3: her smile in the second picture 🥹

user4: empress Marie was a slay

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: she honestly was

~

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by 2,920,163 people

this is what we gotta say to those who haven’t watched Anastasia yet 🖕🖕🖕 (we’re kidding)

view all comments

user1: how was filming in St. Petersburg??

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: had the best time of my life 🙈 St. Petersburg is so gorgeous.

user2: yesss feed us w more Anastasia bts please!!!

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: yes ma’am 🫡

↘️ user3: BAHAHHAHAAH

user4: everyone go watch Anastasia rn. It’s a masterpiece😟

user5: she’s so gorgeous it’s not fair

~

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by 3,027,496 people

pics of me eating the most 21st century food in my 20th century fits 😋‼️

view all comments

tomblyth: fun fact, I took ALL of these

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: 😂😂😂

user1: this is so funny to me LMAO

user2: the fits 🤌

↘️ user3: THEY WERE EVERYTHING!

user4: so this is what u guys do behind the scenes? eating?

↘️ tomblyth: yup.

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: pretty much!!

~

tomblyth

Liked by 4,305,262 people

‘Anastasia’ out now in the cinemas!!!! So incredibly grateful to have worked with such amazing and talented people, experiencing it with y/n made it even better 💗

view all comments

y/n_y/l/n: i’m tearing up…. It was so much fun, I’m going to miss everything about it 💔

↘️ tomblyth: gonna miss seeing u in ur costume 🥹 you looked absolutely gorgeous

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: awee I love u!!!!

↘️ user1: my parents r so adorable 😣

user2: third pic is everything!

user3: they did so good with the casting!

~

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by 3,947,028 people

St. Petersburg weather was smth else 🥶

view all comments

actorwhoplaysrasputin: it wasn’t even that cold y/n 🙄

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: says the person who wore 4 jackets in between takes 😟

↘️ actorwhoplaysrasputin: zip it.

↘️ user1: I love this duo 😂

actorwhoplaysphlegmenkoff: it was a pleasure to work with such young, talented actors like yourselves!!!

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: awee thank you actors name!! It was an honour to work with you!!

↘️ tomblyth: appreciate it man 🤝

user2: them casting actors name as Rasputin was the best decision ever. Can’t see anyone else for that role!

user3: this movie had such iconic actors and actresses 😭

↘️ user4: I just know this movie was expensive 😃

~

y/n_y/l/n

Liked by 4,307,287 people

Anastasia dump pt. 2974822? 😂

view all comments

user1: FIRST PIC HAHAHAHA

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: felt xtra cute so I had to 😛

↘️ user2: Tom not looking amused in the back 🤣

↘️ tomblyth: I’m used to it

actorwhoplaysvladimir: miss you guys!!!

↘️ tomblyth: you act as if we don’t live in the same street 🤣

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: literally walk the few steps and you’ll see us lol

user3: I can’t wait for more of your bts vids to come out on yt bc man they’re so entertaining!!

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: I’m posting a 30 min bts vlog tomorrow 😙

↘️ user4: YAYYY

↘️ user5: y/n has a yt channel and I haven’t heard about it?

↘️ user6: she’s had it since she was in high school 😭

~

tomblyth

Liked by 6,958,212 people

Can’t believe ‘Anastasia’ has been nominated for best film adaptation of books!!! Thank you everyone who voted :)

view all comments

y/n_y/l/n: THIS IS INSANEE AHHHH

↘️ tomblyth: 🥳🎉

themichaellockshin: 🤩🤩

actorwhoplaysnicholas: hell yeah!!

user1: they’re so cute omg 🥺

user2: actresswhoplaysdowagermarie is such a slay 😭

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: she literally is!

↘️ tomblyth: we love her!

↘️ user2: ahhh you both responded 😭

~

themichaelockshin

Liked by 10,037,297

Cheers again for the love and support for this movie!! To all the cast members I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, you are all such talented people and it was wonderful working with you all!

view all comments

y/n_y/l/n: thank you Michael ❤️ will never forget this experience :)

↘️ themichaelockshin: you and Tom were spectacular 🤩

tomblyth: what a journey we went through!

actorwhoplaysrasputin: miss you all!

actorwhoplaysolga: thank you Michael!! Filming with you all was a wonderful experience 🫶

user1: ice cream during the winter?

↘️ y/n_y/l/n: yup. What abt it 😛

user2: awe I love this cast sm

↘️ user3: literally the best cast

[diorsluv]

feather , part 5

“ then you pull back ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by rutgermcgroarty, _alexturcotte, trevorzegras, and 45,886 others

yourusername what a fancy vintage car ⁉️

view all comments

colecaufield do you ever take insta pics where you’re looking directly at the camera 🙃

→ yourusername IT’S NOT MY FAULT IT’S MY BROTHER WHO TAKES BAD PICS

→ jamie.drysdale MAYBE YOU’RE JUST UGLY

→ yourusername I’M TELLING MOM YOU CALLED ME UGLY

→ jamie.drysdale FINE YOU’RE JUST NOT PHOTOGENIC 😑😑

username24 i’m down HORRENDOUS for this woman

lhughes_06 wow the color of the car really makes your eyes pop

→ dylanduke25 are you dumb

→ mackie.samo bro u can’t even see her eyes in the pics

→ _alexturcotte istg this kid

→ yourusername thank u lukey 😭😭

trevorzegras okay hear me out

→ yourusername no.

→ trevorzegras I HAVEN’T EVEN SAID ANYTHING YET

→ yourusername immediate no

→ _quinnhughes this is why you’re my favorite drysdale yourusername

username79 now tell me she isn’t the most beautiful girl in the world

username6 god if only i lived in michigan

luca.fantilli he’s asking for a close up of your face

→ yourusername what who 💀

→ luca.fantilli u know who

→ markestapa he says he doesn’t wanna say anything bc then it’ll just reveal who he is 😂😂

→ edwards.73 it’s luke dumbasses

this reply has been deleted

username13 OH MY FUCKING GOD DID ANYONE SEE ETHAN’S REPLY TO LUCA’S COMMENT THREAD

→ username50 I KNOW MY DRYSHUGHES SHIP IS SAILING

→ username25 DID HE DELETE IT?

→ username98 YES I THOUGHT I WAS GOING INSANE

yourusername

liked by edwards.73, mackie.samo, lhughes_06, and 37,993 others

yourusername bc cole thinks i don’t take full face pics 😒😒😒 (are u happy now???????)

jamie.drysdale you’ve had those earmuffs since you were like 10

→ yourusername NO they’re new ☹️

→ jamie.drysdale clearly you’ve gotten too attached to your 10 year old style choices 😬

→ yourusername why are you being so mean all of a sudden 😔😔

colecaufield OKAY i said you didn’t take pics of your face whatsoever, not full face pics

→ yourusername ARE. U. HAPPY. NOW?!?!?!?!?!

→ colecaufield YES I’M HAPPY GOOD GOD

username64 i need the makeup tut rn

username73 she’s so petty i love it

dylanduke25 cole’s not the only one that’s happy

→ yourusername oh my god this better not be about who i think it is

adamfantilli did you dye your hair lighter or am i going blind

→ yourusername you’re going blind

→ yourusername not too good for your hockey career babe

→ jamie.drysdale BABE????

→ yourusername NO NOT LIKE THAT OMFG jamie.drysdale

→ jamie.drysdale you better treat my sister right. 🙂🙂 adamfantilli

→ adamfantilli no no no it’s not like that i swear

→ dylanduke25 i take it back, cole’s the only one that’s happy now

→ yourusername DUKER STOP

next chapter notes ) i’m enjoying these a little too much 🤭 always gotta add in those little luke moments for yall AND WHEN I TELL YOU I LOVE THISSSSSS (jk i came back after i wrote it and i kinda hate it) and i said i’d be gone for finals week but.. i’m speeding through these bc they’re too fun so i’m choosing to feed yall 🤍🤍🤍

[local-new-kid-super]

Little things Professor Chaos does for New Kid! Reader after a battle.

Sorry this took me a bit, been busy!

☆ First things first, Professor Chaos knows the most important part of turning the tides in battle is minions. Taking care of your legion is important, so before his Chaos army packs up after a fight, Butters is going to be checking up on each of his Chaos army members. He's picked up minimal spanish from his time as Mantequilla, so he checks on his hired workers and the dogs wrapped in tin foil. Catch him handing out tinfoil covered juice boxes and ham sandwiches, or little 'Princess Kenny' brand bandaids.

☆ You're a hero, so he's not technically supposed to patch you up, but that doesn't mean he wants to hurt you! He'll avoid directly attacking you, and might occasionally drop a healing item or two onto the floor.

☆ He admires you so much! You're a real hero, not just someone doing it for money or fame (like a certain Trash-panda themed hero). A part of him worries you could never really be his friend because of his love for chaos, but, surely if you knew what he'd been through you'd understand.

☆ "You're impressive moves, and good looks are no match for Chaos, New Kid!"

"Good looks? Thats fucking gay, Chaos." Raccoon says, and Chaos founders.

"Aw geez..."

☆ You'll frequently end up 'kidnapped' and taken to the U-Stor-It for interrogation, but Professor Chaos seems to have no desire to figure out what Raccoon and Friends are actually up too.

☆"Mwahaha! Foolish hero, you've allowed yourself to get caught up in the chaos of battle! Now you're officially my prisoner." Professor Chaos cackles, a crack of lighting crosses the sky as he stops laughing and seems to grow a bit awkward. "Uh, I'm gonna interrogate you now, okay? Don't go anywhere, I gotta get my minions for back up-" About half an hour later, he's having you aid his 'villainy' by feeding carrot sticks to his sweet gerbil minions.

"So, new kid, what kind of... what kind stuff does a hero do when they have free time? You know, and who do they, uh, who do they hang out with?"

[tojipie]

ohmygosh y did u put toji wit a newborn on my dash... 😵‍💫 now i gotta talk about how he rlly rlly rlly wants to try his best. i want 2 imagine u have twins (megumi and tsumiki) and he doesnt want u to feel like you're the main parent, so while ur laying on the bed chilling, hes in the bathroom with the two miniscule little things :(( plopping then gently as ever into the shallow cradles slightly below the water level in the bath rub. and he always gets soo nervous when hes reminded of how small they are compared to his big hands. its kinda cute too u sit on the counter sometimes and watch as he uses the softest brush and massage their little heads while they snort and groan and make little baby noises like they do :(( sometimes he side eyes u to see if ur judging him and you just put your hands up and let him do what he needs to do lol.

i thinkk bc he consistently feels remorse for those years u were alone, he goes the extra mile to ensure he keeps up to standard with u after hes out and after u give birth. bc while he doesnt expect u to get up and work out he keeps maintaining his muscle. when he hears about dad bods he goes ???? cuz what😭🤨 he calls em 'lazy fucks' who dont actually do shit for their wives

this is also a part of the reason why since maybe the kids were about a week old he'd asked if u guys ciuld explore breast pumping options, so u could pump out milk in advance when u had an oversupply and that way he could feed the babies on his own without you feeling like you should be depending on as a main caregiver 😭

tears in my eyes . hands shaking . sobbing with snot. u are a genius

[saintsir4n]

Hewwo! Currently I have an unnatural obsession with Brian O’Conner atm n I read ALL that u have to post on him. So can u make some 1shots on the newest addition to the family and Carson n Brian navigate life as new parents, maybe even throw a little vacation for the 2 of them while rest r taking care of baby Jessie😘

BABY STEPS

WARNINGS: mentions of postpartum depression and angst.

——

“No, no, Jessie don’t touch mama’s hair when you’re trying to — and you’ve done it,” Carson groaned, when some baby food got in her hair. Jessie babbled in her high chair. A silicone bib was wrapped around her little neck and a confused look was written on her chubby face. “Now it’s all in my braids.”

“Digging the new look,” Brian teased as he jogged into the room, having heard his wife’s yell. The 13 month year old, squealed when she saw her dad. “Jessie, have you been causing trouble? You know your mommy’s hair is her pride and joy.”

“Don’t say that Brian," Carson grumbled out, trying to clean out her braids.

His jokes only irritated her, he knew that.

“She won’t know," Brian didn't see the harm in trying to lighten the mood and picked up their daughter after taking off her bib, smiling brightly and broadly when she mirrored his experience with her baby teeth.

“She understands more than you think. She’s got your big beady eyes — I’m kidding baby, you know I think they’re adorable,” she quickly corrected herself upon catching her daughter's frown. “See.”

“Don’t mock her," Brian playfully scolded, “Don’t mock me.” he turned to his princess, tickling her tummy. “Mommy’s being mean ain’t she?”

“She likes you more than me," Carson shrugged, standing up and pinning her hair up.

Brian quietly scoffed as he gently bounced their daughter, “No, she doesn’t.” he never understood why she kept saying that. “She loves us equally. You just gotta be more patient with her.”

“It’s easy for you to say that, you leave the house more than I do.”

Brian sighed, “You know what I mean. Just be more …”

“Patient?” Carson snapped back, trying to clean up the mess their daughter made.

All day, every day she felt exhausted, tired and even more frustrated with everything, especially with her husband, which meant they were rarely intimate.

“Maybe next time you feed her you tie up your hair I don’t know — wait, Sonny," he called out, watching as she folded her arms and glowered at him.

“I don’t need your shit right now Brian," she hissed, trying not to startle their daughter who picked up more words recently. “You aren’t here every day. I have to do so much around the house. We have a dog that does as much damage as our daughter —“

“— she doesn’t cause damage. Ultra’s a dog and she’s a baby what did you expect?” Brian exclaimed.

Jessie stared between them in confusion as she was placed back in her highchair.

“More support. I need more help from you. That’s what I expected. No, in fact, that’s what you promised me.” She had expressed to him that they would share equal responsibilities before they decided to keep their baby. She feared motherhood because she never had a mom growing up. Brian’s parents were flaky so he told her that they would do their best together. At times she would regret agreeing. “Every day I have to tidy up 5 times. I wake up early to her cries and screams, I prepare her food, prepare the dog's food, our food, all while you’re out —“

“Working? Providing for us. And everything you said, that’s what you’re supposed to do. That’s your job.”

Brian's eyes snapped shut when he realised his mistake.

Carson slowly nodded to herself, “Wow. Thanks, Brian.”

“You know what I mean," he tried, staring at her apologetically, "I'm sorry."

“Yeah, I do know what you mean," Carson exhaled. “Just forget I said anything. Jessie needs to be put down for her nap.”

She approached their daughter, missing the confusion on her husband's face.

“She just ate isn’t that a bit too soon?”

Carson carefully picked up Jessie, who quickly started fussing. Stay calm, please stay calm. She would tell herself and Jessie. Sometimes she wouldn't think of anything else.

“I’ve got her on a schedule. She needs to stick with it so I can get some me time because asking you for help is too much apparently," she gritted, not hearing the whimpering from Jessie.

“Don’t get like that, I’m trying to help when I can," Brian threw his hands up in the air.

“Well, it’s not good enough. You’re not here for me. Not as much as you promised. And some days I am losing my fucking —“ Jessie started to cry, “No. No, don't cry.”

“It’s okay baby,” Brian neared them, taking her tiny hand as tears streamed down her face.

Jessie didn't want to be held, no, she didn't want to be in her mom's arms. That was clear.

“I’m sorry Jess," Carson repeated, for what felt like an hour.

But only a minute went by.

She wanted to cry. She wanted nothing more than to cry, but she couldn't she had other things to do. Her throat was drying up, and her eyes blinking rapidly.

Only when Brian took Jessie did she start to calm down.

Carson had to tear her eyes away from the soft and tender sight.

Brian was a good dad. He loved singing and playing with his daughter whenever he could.

And it only made Carson feel worse.

“She’s good, aren't you princess?" Brian bounced her, "I’ll put her down and we can talk.”

Carson sat down in her chair, with tears pooling in her eyes. She hated it, not now, go away, please. Fuck, she felt exhausted, useless, confused.

Brian turned to his wife, panicking at the sadness flashing over her face. She turned so he wouldn’t see, but he could.

“What’s the point?” Carson sighed, rubbing her face, “Nothing's gonna change.”

“I wanna help," Brian knew he needed to do more.

“Until you can’t and it’s me that’s left to do everything. Like I’m supposed to right?” Carson drawled with a sniffle and stood up again.

“Sonny, can you just wait a second. I’m sorry about what I said.”

Carson waved him off, “I’m going to go and get this food out of my hair. You know, my pride and joy, right?"

Brian cursed herself when she left the room. He offered his daughter a small smile when she leaned her head against his shoulder and eyes drooped.

Nap time.

He could do that, he could follow his wife's schedule, even if it was a little. He needed to help.

He put down Jessie in her Princess crib. Princess Jasmine posters were all over the room, she even had a little doll that she clung to.

Brian pressed a kiss to her head as she drifted to sleep, "Daddy loves you. Mommy loves you too. She's tired and Daddy needs to do more."

Shortly after he left the nursery and pulled out his phone, looking around before dialling.

“Hey," he greeted, glad that his wife was locked away in their room.

“Wassup Brian?” Suki's voice tore through the phone.

“I need some help. Carson needs to get out for a few days. The house is driving her crazy.”

“The house or you?”

“Alright, alright, I was thinking of going on a trip just us two. You up babysitting, and looking after Ultra?”

“Sure, you paying me right," he heard her laughing.

Brian groaned, “Suki.”

“Me and Tej can do it. Don’t worry. Just book the trip and pack her bags. I know she needs this.”

Brian frowned, “What’s she said?”

“Mind your business. Now go and talk to your wife.”

——

a/n:

thank you for the suggestion! it was so cute to write. I didn’t expect it to turn so angsty, but I kinda feel like this is where their early stages of parenthood would go to, considering Brian would work and Carson would stay at home. They’re living a normalish life and Carson is having to deal with so much.

I also feel like if Brian planned a trip to go somewhere, he would feel like that would solve everything but Carson might just get worse. She feels like she doesn’t have his support because he simply isn’t there all the time.

[queer-overwatch]

Omg hi! We need more venture! And im having major brainrot of Venture and how they might be with kids! What if Reader and Sloane went to one of those itty bitty play dig sight activities and just see little kids brushing sand away from (fake) fossils! Like how will they react seeing a little kid learning about dinosaurs from Venture?

OR!

Reader having to babysit their niece or nephew and Venture is there along the way. And the just their niece/nephew just absolutely love listening to Sloane’s stories!

Im sorry if this is too much! You dont have to do this! Or you can just do whatever! I love your work and finally we can get more Venture love!

Venture with readers Niece!

It's not to much at all! I really like the idea of Venture being a parent personally- decided to do a one-shot for this one, hope u like it anon! -Frisk

══════ஜ▲ஜ══════

"Heeey, Sloane-? Sooooo quick question, how do you feel about 5 year olds-?" You grin sheepishly, standing behind Venture who was at their desk, studying a rock from an ancient Roman burial sight they found.

"Oh I love kids! They're always so cute, even though they can be brats sometimes- why you askin?" They put down the rock as they talk, turning to look at you curiously.

"Well, my sibling asked me if I could babysit today, and I may have said yes without thinking of the fact that you'd have to deal with my niece too." You laugh nervously, really hoping they won't be upset. You knew they loved kids so you weren't too worried about it, but you also weren't sure if they'd planned to do something today.

"Aw really!? I've haven't gotten to meet your family before! That's so cool! Does your niece like history?! I really hope she does- I love telling people about my discoveries! Do you think she likes eating rocks too-?" Venture, just as enthusiastic as ever, bombards you with questions about your family. You let out a sigh of relief as you try your best to answer all of their many, many, many questions, trying your best to keep them contained as you wait for your sister to drop off your niece, "Venture you are not feeding my niece rocks."

"Aww, but these ones are so cool!"

"I will chip another one of your teeth if you convince her to eat a rock."

"GASP! Betrayal!"

══════ஜ▲ஜ══════

"Of course, see you later! Love you too!" You gently usher your niece inside as you part ways with your sibling, now stuck babysitting for the next five hours.

Venture stands just behind the door, a nervous feeling in the back of their head. Despite being slightly worried your niece wouldn't like them, they were still super excited! They really hoped she would like them so she would tell your sibling good things about them and your sibling would finally want to meet them! And, of course, they were also hoping your niece would like to hear the story's Venture had to share.

As soon as you're niece is five steps in the door, Venture makes themselves known, jumping in front of her with their hands on their hips, in a sort of superhero pose.

"Hey there, little miss! How'd you get in here, huh?" They kneel down, a light tone in their voice as they tease her. "Mi amor! I think we've got an intruder on our hands!"

You shut the front door as you laugh to yourself, moving to stand next to Venture and rest one hand on their shoulder, slightly leaning against them. "Yeah, I think we do! We've gotta send 'em to the interrogation room!"

You scoop up your niece, laughing as she squirm around in your arms, cleary enjoying all the attention.

You both bring her to Venture's work space, setting her down in their chair and trying your hardest to look serious as you "interrogate" her.

"Who might you be, hm? And why are you here?!" Venture starts, poking your niece's cheek as they question her.

Your niece, while giggling, manages to answer their questions pretty well in your opinion. "I'm Charlotte! I'm here 'cuz my momma wants me to be!" She huffs, hands on her hips with the most adorable, smug face you've ever seen.

Venture nods along as she answers, clearly taking this so, so very seriously. "Well then, I suppose you can stick around, as long as you like to learn about history!" They laugh, picking her up and tucking her under their arm, bringing them to a spare room where they keep a few of their favorite artifacts they've they've found to show off.

"This one is from Greece! I got to go there for a week last year! And this one if from a remote area in northern Canada! Found that during my first year with the Wayfinders!" They point out different rocks and other things you can't quite identify, easily answering any questions your niece throws their way.

You stand in the doorway, smiling to yourself and admiring just how sweet Venture can be, wondering how in the world you got lucky enough to be dating them.

Your mind wanders, wondering what Venture would be like if the two of you had a kid. It wasn't something you thought about too often, but seeing how sweet they were with your niece, you couldn't help but wonder if they'd ever want kids of their own.

Obviously it wouldn't be anytime soon, you were both far too busy for that, but one day, maybe.

"Amor! Come here! You gotta listen to this story too! This cool little coin is from the Renaissance Era!" Venture snaps you out of your thoughts, holding a little golden coin up for you to see.

You move to stand next to them, taking your niece out of their arms and holding her yourself, both of you listening intently to Ventures story. Clearly, you're niece and you had one thing in common, you both absolutely adored the wonderful nerd you were dating.

[toonsurvival]

Last Update of this Fanmade Rockstar Roses AU

[Maybe...it really depends...]

Remember this AU does not Belong to me it Belong too....

@amalsoappickle

..........

.........

........

.......

......

.....

....

...

..

.

OK I know this AU is supposed to be Dark and serious but...

I have a Funny scenario where Rainmaker one day at Work just minding her own Business doing paperwork or whatever Managers do.

While she's doing that Marble realized that Misty forgot to Grab her Lunch Box today and Decided to Visit her Work Place.

She put on her Disguise 🥸 and get ready to set of with "Gear Riggy" once she finally reaches the Building...

She went to the Front Desk 😳 in a Timid Childlike Voice...

"Excuse Me, I'm Down here."

Cog looks over their Desk

"Well Hello there little Missy, what you need help with?" Why aren't you in School they thought

"My Mom forgot to Grab her Lunch, so I brought it for her."

Tries to put it on Desk but Failed so they walked around their Desk to help her out.

"Do you want me to Deliver it to your Mom? or you want me to Call her on the Speaker?" Why does she look so Similarly to someone I know?

"Call her Please."

"OK what is your Mom's Name? If you don't know I can use your name instead to call her." What is this Nagging Feeling I'm having???

"My Name is Murkey Monsoon and my Mom is Misty Monsoon" she innocently said

The Cog gave Murkey a surprise look on their face "Oh... Wow! OK than kid I'll call 📞 your Mom right know." HOLLY SH×T MISTY HAD A KID?!?!

Turn on Speaker 🔊 in Building "Miss Rainmaker your Kid is here to Drop off your Lunch, please come to the Front Desk." THIS IS GOOD GOSSIP MATERIAL!!! BUT I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS???

Rainmaker flying down to the Desk "Hi Sweetie~ 👋 thank you for bringing my Lunch." kneeling down to give hug.

"Hi Mommy!" Jumps to give Hug 🫂 back.

The Cog from the Desk look at them back and forth, holy s*** they look so damn identical!!!

OK maybe a little bit different but still!!!

"Here’s your Lunch Ma'am."

"Thank you." Grabs the Lunch Box from Cog while carrying Murkey and Gear Riggy in her Arm.

"Do you know how to get back home 🏡 Darling?"

"Don't worry Mommy! I know how to get Home."

Rainmaker Gently put both of them down.

"OK then walk home Safe!"

"We will!"

Murkey & Gear Riggy happily exist the Building

.....

"So... how old is she?" The Cog looked at her Curiously

"She's 6 Year Old" Rainmaker said

.....

"OK then... I have one more Question to ask?"

"What is it?"

"WHEN AND HOW DID YOU BECAME A MOTHER???"

Rainmaker look at them in a very disappointed look but not really surprised.

"I've always have been a Mother in the Very beginning, why do you think 🤔 I worked so hard to reach the Manager position 😅 like I gotta feed my Kid somehow."

The Cog from the Desk looked at Rainmaker in Shock 😲 and have no Idea 💡what to do with this information.

Holly Sh×t! Holly Sh×t!! Holly Sh×t!!!

WTF!!!

While they we're screaming in their head Rainmaker flew away back to their Office.

Here's a Closer Look of Murkey Monsoon and Gear Riggy 😀

Random Information

• Murkey is Home Schooled.

(Fake Info to tell Cogs)

• Murkey accidentally Burnt Riggy's Right Eyelashes while cooking with her Mom.

(Fake Info)

• Murkey is natural Timid around Cogs but is Terrified of Cogs who got a very Scary Upgrade (Since they do not look Kid Friendly at all.)

• Rainmaker and Murkey made sure to make a lot of Family pictures just in case Misty needs to act like a very Proud Mother.

• Gear Riggy is not allowed to Breath out fire 🔥 because it's too Recognizable, but they are allowed to Bite though.

• Murkey makes Consumable Art 🎨 of Rainmaker's Lunch/Dinniner and sometimes it will have little cute Messages on it like.

"Love U Mom"

"Have a Great Day~"

"Remember to take a Break"

"Keep up the Good Work"

"Have a Lovely Day Mom!"

Etc

(Cogs will either get Jelly of Rainmaker's Cute Lunch Box/Bento Box that Murkey made or Curious what it looks like.)

[underworld-park-offical]

PIP: Yes and I'll get the uhm

PIP: I'll get the uh

PIP: I’ll get

PIP: …

PIP: Lemme get ahhhh

PIP: Boneless Pizza 

PIP: And uh

PIP: Two liter of uh

PIP: Coke

HEIDI: …

HEIDI: The fuck kinda pizza?

HEDI: And the two liter machine broke, we got one liter tho

PIP: The fuck you mean B?

PIP: Alright look, 

PIP: Let me get that pizza BONELESS

HEIDI: Uh? Pizza don't got bone in it

PIP: Tf did I just say then

HEIDI: U said "Lemme get it BONELESS " like pizza got a damn bone in it

PIP: Y'all got BONES in ya shit then

HEIDI: Nah

PIP: So what's the problem?

HEIDI: DICK HEAD name one pizza that got bone on it

PIP: Just don't put them shits in my pizza bruh how many times I gotta say it

HEIDI: Bruh jus explain to me how tf pizza can be boneless?

PIP: If it don't got bone in it iss boneless

HEIDI: Son, what school u go to

PIP: dawg I don't understand the problem just make my shit BONELESS  DEADASS

HEIDI: I'm deadass not making this pizza…

PIP: Fine, then you deadass  better get me exactly what I want

PIP: Why are you so…

PIP: frumpy?

HEIDI: Excuse me?

PIP: You heard me

PIP: You won't even get me a boneless pizza 

PIP: How do you think that makes you look?

HEIDI: erm.

PIP: FRUMPY

HEIDI: You wanna play that way, huh?

HEIDI: Number 1, F = (m)(a) = (1000 kg)( 3 m/s²) =

3000 N.

PIP: What.

HEIDI: HMMMM a = F/a = 200 N / 2.5 m/s² = 80kg

PIP: Is there a manager I can speak to?

HEIDI: OHHH, YOU WANT THE ANSWERS  TO THE CROSSWORD ???

HEIDI: Ahem

HEIDI: One is centripetal, two is negative acceleration, three is plate tectonics, four is relative motion, five is slope—

PIP: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

HEIDI: SIX IS SPEED, SEVEN IS AVERAGE SPEED

PIP: WHAT'S EVEN THE GODDAMN DIFFERENCE?!

HEIDI: OH, I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!

HEIDI: AHEM

HEIDI: THE MITOCHONDRIA IS THE POWERHOUSE OF THE CELL PIP: CAN I JUST GET PIP: MY GODDAMN PIP: FOOD PLEASE

TWEEK: WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING NICE??? PIP: I AM BEING NICE!!

TWEEK: BY YELLING??? PIP: FUCK YOU RESPECTFULLY

HEIDI: OKAY FINE, I'LL GET YOU YOUR GODDAMN BONELESS PIZZA OR WHATEVER DUMB QUEER SHIT YOU ORDERED

HEIDI: What do you want you low budget Super Sonic?

TWEEK: Uh yeah uh

TWEEK: What's this thing?

HEIDI: Do you have are stupid?

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: What?

HEIDI: Do you.

HEIDI: Have are.

HEIDI: Stupid?

HEIDI: Bitch?

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: What

TWEEK: What nonsense are you speaking?

TWEEK: What

HEIDI: That is a MENU

HEIDI: Say it with me

HEIDI: MEN

HEIDI: U!

TWEEK: Oh! A Meenew!

TWEEK: Cool!

PIP: Ignore him, he’s an imbecile

TWEEK: Hey! I'm not…

PIP: Anyways, he’ll have a pudding

HEIDI: We don't serve pudding here

TWEEK: No… no pudding???

HEIDI: No sir, we don’t have pudding

TWEEK: ( starts to cry like a lil bitch )

HEIDI: …

HEIDI: We have jello?

TWEEK: IT'S NOT THE SAME!! WAHHHHH!!!

PIP: He’ll just take a coffee

TWEEK: I DON'T WANT COFFEE!! I WANT PUDDIN!!

PIP: Shut

PIP: The

PIP: FUCK UP!

PIP: (SLAP )

TWEEK: ( Ugly Crying )

HEIDI: O….

HEIDI: Kkkkkkayyyyy…

HEIDI: What does the walking fetus want?

PIP: The what?

HEIDI: The child

HEIDI: What can we get for your child?

TWEEK: Right! My

TWEEK: My child

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Her names Silly String

HEIDI: Cool

HEIDI: Cool cool cool

HEIDI: What does… HEIDI: Silly String

HEIDI: Want to eat

TWEEK: Uh…

TWEEK: What do kids eat?

TWEEK: Do  kids even eat?

HEIDI: Yes, kids eat, captain obvious

PIP: Tweek she’s eating a crayon

TWEEK: Oh

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Do kids eat crayons?

PIP: No

PIP: No they do not

HEIDI: Does

HEIDI: Does Silly String

HEIDI: Want the jello instead?

TWEEK: No

TWEEK: I'm not feeding her that garbage

PIP: Can we just get a round of tater tots?

PIP: Please

HEIDI: Sure

HEIDI: Whatever gets me to stop talking to you 

HEIDI: And whatever gets me paid 

PIP: Well! That went over nicely!

TWEEK: You slapped me

PIP: It's a start

TWEEK: No

TWEEK: It's really not 

PIP: I'm recovering

PIP: I'm changing

PIP: I'm metamorphosing

PIP: I'm evolving

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Whatever

TWEEK: You seeing this shit, Silly String? 

SILLY STRING: ( Grunt of disapproval  )

PIP: What, so you’re getting your child to hate me too?

TWEEK: You  hate us

PIP: I mean

PIP: True

PIP: But I'm changing

TWEEK: Liar

PIP: Okay I'm lying

PIP: But Estella put me in a fucking time out

PIP: So I have to act  nice

PIP: Even though I really

PIP: REEEEALLY

PIP: Don’t want to be

SILLY STRING: ( confused grunt )

TWEEK: Estella's your grandma, Silly String 

SILLY STRING: ( surprised grunt )

PIP: Ugh

PIP: I hate Mum…

TWEEK: You see her as a mom too?

PIP: I

PIP: Uh

PIP: NO PIP: I NEVER SAID THAT

PIP: She's just so overprotective of us all the damn time

PIP: IT'S ANNOYING

TWEEK: SHhh

TWEEK: Don't shout!

TWEEK: There's people behind us…

TWEEK: Why the fuck are they looking at us like that?

PIP: It's the queer stare

PIP: They're harshly judging you

TWEEK: Oh god…

TWEEK: Heyyyyy

TWEEK: Silly String, say hi

SILLY STRING: ( excited grunting  )

TWEEK: You all look

TWEEK: SO  cool

TWEEK: Did you come from the Pride Parade?

TWEEK: Er- I mean…

TWEEK: Uh…

TWEEK: This is my son

TWEEK: …Daughter?

TWEEK: Child?

TWEEK: I don't know what Silly String is…

PIP: Didn’t you call her, “her ” earlier?

TWEEK: I mean,

TWEEK: YEAH

TWEEK: That doesn't mean I know

TWEEK: Wait

TWEEK: What are  you, Silly String?

SILLY STRING: ( I don't know grunt )

PIP: It's a mystery!

PIP: How are you all this lovely evening?

PIP: Just SWELL I presume?

TWEEK: Pip your eye is twitching

PIP: IT'S HAPPY SEIZING!!!

TWEEK: No… no pretty sure it's twitching

PIP: HAPPY. SEIZING. I'M SO JOYFUL I'M EXPRESSING IT THROUGH MY EYE!

TWEEK: …Sure…

(Edits made by @pissblanket and @zemoleinyourtrashcan)

[nijisanji-brain-rot-fics]

luxiem x reader || as fathers

a/n : YALL LIKE MY LUXIEM HCS MORE THAN MY OTHER ONES SO HERE U GO LMAO 😭 ill feed u guys some more luxiem content before mysta graduates [sobs louder]

SHU YAMINO

TYPICAL ASIAN DAD

but minus the yelling and stuff

hes just pretty damn strict but like he loves you all the same

if you get an A+ in maths, GOOD JOB, HE'LL TREAT YOU TO ICE CREAM [and maybe a magic show WWWW]

if you get a D-, he'll probably say something along the lines of : " try harder kiddo! you can get a higher mark next time! do you want me to help you study? "

he will definitely show up at all of your events and stuff like that to cheer you on

b a n a n a

omg he would accidentally get banned from ur school games bc he keeps helping you with his witchcraft stuff

LUCA KANESHIRO

OMG HES THE DAD THAT ALL YOUR CLASSMATES LOVE

hes the type to bring like the BEST FOOD during those potlucks ur school has

will panic if you bring math homework to him for help AJSHD

if he cant go to ur school events, HE WILL SO FIND A WAY TO GO, EVEN IF IT WAS JUST FOR A MOMENT

ur little sibling would deadass be a dog.

like no shit, this man would want a dog

and that dog is ur sibling

he and his mafia men would be the ones to raise you [FUCKING BONUS POINTS IF ONE OF HIS MEN IS A WOMAN AND SHE IS UR MOTHER FIGURE]

" oh, don't worry kid, you'll get it next time!! if you're ever feeling down, just know your dad thinks that you're pog! "

you dont know how to tell him that saying pog as a [however old he is] man is a little cringe, but you love him for it (IN A FAMILIAL WAY)

IKE EVELAND

a very chill dad when it comes to homework and grades

unless it was english

if you get a low score in english

THIS MANS IS RUTHLESS. HE WILL GET YOU TO READ. A LOT.

but if you get tired of it, he'll let it go

i feel like he'd be the parent who IS your teacher at school

oh boy, you should dread first day if he's your english teacher

" class, i'd like you all to know, im only fucking one of your mothers. " [all jokes LMAO he wouldnt embarrass you like that..... or would he?]

if you get a low score in any subjects or like if you flunk a test, he'll hug you and say:

" don't cry, you've made me proud already. i love you kiddo, and none of those test marks will change that. just tell me if you ever need help okay? i'm always happy to help you with those. "

MYSTA RIAS

BRO OMG HES THAT ONE DAD WITH INSANE SOCIAL MEDIA PRESENCE

SOMEHOW ALL YOUR FRIENDS FOLLOW HIM ON TWITTER??

the most laidback out of all the luxiem guys about homework

doesn't mind if you flunk it, as long as you did your hardest, it's a pass in his book

he cant physically help you with homework

its a british debuff /j

like he would stare at the pythagorean theorem and go 'uhm....'

HE WOULD HELP YOU WITH ALL YOUR FASHION DILEMMAS

there to listen to all the GODDAMN TEA!! like how dare jessica cheat on james like that with ryan??

dude is like the communal dad if any of ur friends dont have a father figure, he'll be there for them too

" oh you flunked your math test? it's alright!! you'll get it next time. they give you too much tests nowadays you guys are all probably burnt out... how about we watch a movie? your mind needs to destress. "

VOX AKUMA

SHAWTY HAS FLIRTED WITH YOUR TEACHERS MORE THAN ONCE

LIKE YOU GOTTA STOP HIM, HIS RIZZ IS TOO MUCH

also that one dad for some reason everyone likes

hes like pretty strict, but its because he wants the best for you

WOULD GET BANNED FROM TRYING TO GO TO UR SCHOOL GAMES BC HE GETS SO PISSED LMAO

" WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN THEY GET A FOUL?? THEY DIDNT EVEN HIT THE OTHER KID??? "

hes the demon you and ur friends would try to summon at sleepovers

" kid, please, i love you and all, but dad needs to fucking rest. please stop summoning me. "

AND YOUR FRIENDS WOULD SCREAM WWWW

anyways, hes pretty damn smart so hes gotchu covered when it comes to homework help

unless it was history.

history pisses the fuck out of this ancient man.

he will rant about how incorrect the history books are and you'll get nowhere with homework

" oh, darling, it's alright. i'm not disappointed in you and i won't be when it comes to homework. i get it, sometimes it's hard and you don't understand it, but that's when you ask for help, alright? i won't ever shame you for asking me for help. "

a/n : i hope yall r fed this took me 30 minutes to shit out and clean up also i think its obvious whos my favourite in luxiem LMAOO

[safety-writes-noms]

Back again with my daily ask: how was the whole “eating people thing” even introduced to mark? How did unu know that that was something he was capable of; and is it only a dreamscape thing because you said that unu could exist in the human plane for a little while before he started ripping it apart, so have there ever been experiences where he had to go full protecc mode? I’m forcing you to flesh out your world muahaha

Hi!! I love ur asks!!

Gosh darn, guess I really gotta start thinking about my silly characters what a predicament /j

But yeah, noms were introduced to mark as a sort of emergency option. It’s like a speedy version to help heal mark from some injuries. Or at least speed up the process. It’s one of the ways unu can safely infuse his energy into mark via dream. The other way would be through bonding but since they already had that happen they can’t re-bond. 

If mark is injured in the outside world, the injuries pop up in the dream world as well. One time he didn’t listen to unu when he was like “um u prob shouldn’t try to kill that one yet since it’s really strong and stuff. I’ll do it real quick, k?” And then mark got frustrated since he’s basically been coddled for the past months since Roman passed and he still desperately wants revenge. He’s done nothing but train, so surely he must be ready, right? Nope. he almost died when he tried to kill the monster :D. So then unu had to teleport mark out of there real quick, go down to earth himself, and finish it as fast as possible.

Unu had to commence emergency noms to help him out. Best believe that he scolded mark heavily while he was healing. Inside of unu’s belly is pretty soft and squishy. It’s mainly just for healing since he doesn’t really need to eat like a human would. So maximum comfort from a prickly god. Since unu is actively giving his energy (or life force) he gets kinda loopy afterwards and often has to ‘sleep’ it off. He doesn’t actually sleep but he does get lethargic after big healing sessions. So he’ll be a pretty small flame when he accompanies mark around earth. 

Sometimes he noms mark for time out. It’s inevitable that the kid will see him every night when he goes to sleep or when he zones out in the middle of class and unu has picked up a tendency from all of his past avatars to gulp them down when they’re stressed out. When he does this, he’s not really giving them his energy, but taking away theirs.

It’s sorta like the way he feeds. He takes the negative emotion and absorbs it. He doesn’t need it but it does give him a small boost. Or a significant one. It just depends on how stressed the avatar is. Either way, unu is satisfied with a good meal and the comfortable weight of his human nestled away.

[stevie-petey]

YAYYYY THANK YOU STEVIE PETEY!!!! Also am I delusional or am I sensing a lil jealousy from my lil baby Robin? Maybe Steve did miss his chance and it's rugs/ bobins era now. I need to know what Steve has been saying to Dustin about bug!?!? Like what do you mean he likes her in white?? How do you know this you mysterious little man? Hopper and bug have my whole heart you don't understand. I totally understand how bug could be a little disturbed by the kids relationships cause when she was their age she was looking for lizards in the woods with Jonathan and these kids are making out? She'd be so weirded out. Like imagine your younger brother having his first kiss before you, that's gotta sting a lil. It sucks that bugs probably gonna be stuck in the elevator when the mind flayer comes back cause will needs his big sister😭. And Steve's jealous ugghhh it's what I feed off of. Steve and bug both having the same worries about each other is so soulmate of them Jesus Christ. Bug knowing that Steve is struggling with his father, and how she wishes she could show him how smart and amazing he is is so sad and sweet. He's really so amazing. And I know he's gonna feel all cool and sexy when he wins that fight with the Russian guard. Which is he is, he's 100% right. Dustin being disgusted with stug being cute is so real of him. Steve being a flirty little shit while being too scared to make a real move makes me wanna shake him. He knows she won't reject him, but he wants to make it special for her. Now that Steve has mostly given up douche bag ways I can see him as the kind of guy to remember every anniversary. First kiss? Yup, first date? Definitely. When he realized he was in love with bug? How could he forget it!? I need them to get together, better yet throuple with Robin. There's room for three, plenty of bug to go around. But honestly I can't wait for Robin and stug to become the ultimate friend group. I think Robin would make fun of Steve for having a girlfriend who's still in highschool, even though it's only a year between them.

mayhaps ur sensing something from robin 🤭🤭

and the scene with hopper n bug ugh i cant say a lot but that scene is suuuuper important n foreshadow-y they were so fun to write and theyve come so far since season 1 <3333

steves and bugs insecurities being DIRECT parallels of how jon/nance made them feel :((( my babies just need to kiss already. theyre so dumb like wdym ur scared u missed ur chance when ur KISSING EACH OTHERS NECKS ???? imbeciles i tell ya

speaking of imbeciles: steve blabs a lot and poor dustin just hears everything he isnt supposed to rip. and poor bug id also be so baffled by all the kids making out and dating like yall are CHILDREN go play video games and hide and seek get ur mouths away from each other (bug definitely is also a lil bummed dustin got his first kiss before her, it IS a tad embarrassing lmao)

and steve will 1000% he the bf who remembers the first time he even made EYE CONTACT with bug and shes just gonna be like ????? hello ??????

IM GLAD U ENJOYED THE CHAPTER THANK U FOR THE LOVELY ASK I LOOOOVE HEARING YALLS THOUGHTS <3333