#do it for me besties but more importantly do it for YOU
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djungleskogs · 9 months ago
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#OK I NEED TO STOP engaging with 911 ship wars but i have ONE MORE THING to say (probably lying)#i think it’s genuinely concerning how many people believe a ship has to have years of emotional connection before you’re allowed to ship it#like. imo you should be allowed to ship characters for any reason#crackships and rarepairs exist for a reason#secondly and probably more importantly#i think it’s really weird how many people are uncomfortable with the idea of gay sex#not in general but like#people were saying they were uncomfortable and weirded out because#an actor vaguely insinuated that the fictional character he plays would enjoy having gay sex with his partner#like people were calling him a freak#I THINK THATS WEIRD AND CONCERNING#it’s giving ‘my ship doesn’t have sex they make love while holding hands’#i think it ties into the first point#relationships are allowed to be built off attraction#you don’t need years and years of bonding for your relationship to be valid#and i think the visceral reaction against bucktommy because they’re not besties who share a kid is borderline homophobic#like there are plenty of valid reasons to dislike tommy and bucktommy like tommys previous behaviour#but being sooo against a ship based on the fact that there wasn’t enough ‘build up’ and that they don’t have a deep emotional bond#weird#and i don’t think it’s fetishisation to enjoy a canon couple im sorry that’s just a fucking crazy take#like it’s insane to me that apparently enjoying a gay ship is fetishisation unless it meets certain ‘emotional bonding’ criteria#also bathena is one of the most beloved ships on the show and their ‘build up’ was one date and a church hangout#and no one claims that they’re rushed and underdeveloped and that’s why one of them should be written off the show#like i said i think there’s a lot of valid reasons to dislike the ship (even if i do enjoy it)#but some of the arguments i’ve seen are just weird and i think you guys need to look at why it makes you uncomfortable#engage with other fandoms with more diverse ships and maybe you’ll calm down a little#911 discourse#for clarity the tumblr fandom seems to be okay but 911twt is an actual hell scape
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francisforever2014 · 5 months ago
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series of events that happened in the family (my mom, my sisters and my best friend) group chat yesterday:
mom sends in wordle
i respond with my wordle. saying i will get back into it this semester
my older sister says ooh i’ve never played am i gonna get addicted?
i say and i quote “it's addicting if you can deal with the ego death of not being able to figure one out”
my sister (context: 31 years old, going through a catastrophically bad divorce, just moved back in with my mom, quit her job in seattle to do so, is unemployed and legally homeless rn) says “my whole life lately has been one big ego death tbh what's one more!!!! lets goooo”
my mom EMPHASIZES THE TEXT AND SAYS NOTHING ELSE
nobody says anything in the group chat for 24 hours
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daisywords · 1 year ago
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nothing like getting very minorly told off at work to make me feel physically ill for the rest of the day
#logically it's like. ok no one told me not to do that and it was ambiguous#so now that you've said not to I won't in the future. case closed#but it's like ahhhhhhhh so who even told you I was doing that in the first place#and why. were they annoyed? and more importantly did they present the situation accurately to you?#or do you now think I was doing something worse than I actually was?#second of all it wasn't complicated to explain so you didn't need to slack me to tell me to stop by your office#you could have just said it over slack. two sentences#a real win for the inclination to assume that everyone thinks I'm annoying and bad at my job and they regret hiring me#<<skewed for sure but there is a tiny bunny rabbit in my chest who needs a 99:1 positive to negative feedback ratio and she's not getting i#anyway I don't ever want to be seen as resistant to criticism so I'm always just like okay :) 👍#resisting the urge to explain or justify but then that just makes me worry everyone assumes the worst of me#bc I'm not making it absolutely clear where I'm coming from#and the answer is. bestie they aren't thinking abt you at all it's not that deep#also. it makes sense that I am worse than everyone else at my job bc I am the newest and the least experienced#and also! this is the first time I've ever worked in an office environment! first time I've ever worked full time!#I don't know what I'm doing! I deserve a little grace!#anyway yikes yikes yikes#yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes yikes
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Every time I come across a 'Hindu mythology aesthetic moodboard' I go through the stages of grief.
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6-022-10-23 · 2 years ago
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wtf is the guanyin temple arc? is this a joke?
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skyrim-forever · 3 months ago
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Worst Places to Jerk Off in Skyrim
In no particular order, as they are all shit in their own ways :P
Redwater Spring
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Unless you are a vampire or werewolf then you are getting all the diseases. And if you are a vampire, don't do that to the food??? Unless, you're into that 😏
2. Altar of Molag Bal
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I don't even need to say why, y'all already know. If you are so inclined (I'm not kink shaming I'm kink asking why) go to the one in Castle Volkihar at least. Don't do it in Markarth my guy
3. The Dwemer Lockbox at Septimus Signus's Outpost
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Okay, this might just be me but it would be impossible to have a good time inside a giant Dwemer mechanism with Hermaeus Mora lurking around. HOWEVER, I am aware I am posting this on tesblr on monsterfucker.com so if you are an enjoyer of tentacles than this may be a top spot. You do you bestie, have fun becoming a Seeker someday <3
4. The Chantry of Auri-El
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Gelebor has been through enough
5. Frostfall Lighthouse
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You probably don't want to anyways
6. Inside Tel Mithryn with Neloth is there
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This also has the caveat as some of you (including myself to an extent) are into Neloth. That said, I feel like he would absolutely destroy you with insults that even if he didn't ban you you'd never come back
7. The Warren
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Wahoooo second Markarth location! Incredibly depressing, would not be a good vibe
8. The Chill
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It's fuckin cold my guy
9. Yngvild
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Also cold but more importantly, Arondil has major issues. The room of dead women, the contents of his journals NOPE I am kinkshaming him
10. The Butcher's murder room in Hjerim
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Let's offer the dead some peace since we cannot bring the killer to justice as the quest is always broken!!!
Feel free to add your own picks, we could also do a list of the best places ;)
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moonlightcycle571 · 2 months ago
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Lmao I just had a fantastic vision.
The JL fighting a multiversal threat, and the for keeps disappearing into different universes/worlds. While everyone is coming up with ways to travel to apprehend the foe, Captain Marvel has an idea.
Batman: so far, our current multiversal technology is subpar and unable to go at the rate the villain is going.
Flash: while I can travel through universes, it’s going to take a while to l’acte which one they’re on, and even then, they can leave before I even do anything.
Superman: we need a reliable tracker and transport system. Both being crucial elements we don’t have
Captain Marvel: I have an idea.
Cue to the JL all on a random sidewalk, with the clear instructions to ‘wait until they arrive’ and to ‘not move or interfere in any way shape of form’.
Random Truck: *appears out of nowhere, hitting a random pigeon*
JL: huh
Marvel: well that’s going to be an interesting story. Anyways, there you are! Guys, meet Truck-kun!
JL: excuse me???
Truck-kun:
Marvel: Their a bit shy ☺️
JL: …
Truck-kun: *blushes*
JL: how is that even possible??!??!?
They proceed to go in and go through some weird interdimensional car chase, passing by random worlds, spawning through random streets (for some reason, most of them are in Japan), and more importantly, hitting A LOT of people. Old, young, middle aged, animals, even a vending machine at some point. It’s just a slaughter.
The JL is horrified, and Cap is just sitting in his seat, all chill.
Green Lantern: DID WE JUST HIT SOMEONE
Marvel: yup
Superman: AND YOURE DOING NOTHING TO STOP IT
Marvel: nope
Batman: Captain that kills people
Marvel: it’s not killing, more like transporting them into a different universe that is more suited for them. Had we not hit them, they would have died either ways within the hour. Now they get a second chance of life.
JL: *existential crisis*
Even after the villain is apprehended, they found out they only managed to get this far is because they had a magic car*
Hawkwoman: *stares at the car* how does one come across thee vehicles
Marvel: well I met Truck-kun cause he’s besties with my magic Train. Train-chan told me that Truck-kuns little brother Car-kun got abducted, which is why Truck-kun was so willing to help.
JL:…
Flash: I’m going to go lie down.
Batman: *mentally adding magic vehicle community to his conspiracy board*
Bonus:
Green Arrow: *retelling what happened* -and then some random Truck pulls up
Conner Hawke: lmao you met Truck-kun
Green Arrow:
Conner:
Black Canary: … how do you know that name?
Conner: w h a t
Bonus 2:
Naturally Conner tells Damian, who tells Jon, who tells Kon, who tells the Titans and basically the whole thing spreads.
Red Robin: YOU MET TRUCK KUN! THE GREAT ONE HIMSELF
Spoiler: THE ALL MIGHTY WHEELS OF STEEL
Cyborg: WHY WASNT I INVITED! CAP YOU LBOW HOW MUCH I LIKE MY ISEKAI
Blue Beetle: JUST CAUSE YOU GASLIGHT DOES NOT MEAN YOURE A GIRL BOSS
Superboy: SHARING IS CARING
Arsenal, lying on the road: TAKE ME
Bonus 3:
Static Shock: next you’ll be telling us you know Archie’s magic bus
Marvel: well I’m not sure I know who this ‘Archie’ is, but Train-chan does have a cousin called Bus-san.
Titans: *explode*
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leviathanxprincess · 3 months ago
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Introducing The Kings to Your Plushies
me and my bestie have a joke about my faves showing up to my place for sex and i would not realize and just start talking about my plushies based on this dumb post we saw once, thought it'd be funny to turn into an actual scenario lol might do this for the other devils, angels, minhyeok if the ppl are interested lol notes: mildly sexual - not really anything deeply insane, gender neutral reader !!!
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Satan
On one hand, he thinks you're really cute. On the other hand, he's here to fuck so.
He's going back and forth so much in his head for a moment he's not even paying attention to you talking oops.
Gets so frustrated and angered from trying to decide what to do it ultimately ends with him just jumping on you.
Cut you off mid word with an incredibly heat filled kiss from rage.
Honestly you might not even 100% be certain what happened but you're not complaining!! You can always talk about the rest of your plushies later!!!
Well. If Satan doesn't fuck you until the point you're resting for the next couple days.
Once he actually pays attention to you talking about them he'll remember some names here and there, but he will get them wrong on purpose to try and see you angry lol.
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Mammon
The reality is he probably got you most of these plushies.
He adores seeing how you cherish them and the lore you've decided for them!!
Will remember every single detail you tell him about them!!
He thinks it's super cute and will humor you for the moment.
However, Mammon will get what he wants eventually. But for right now you're so adorable how could he tell you no?
He is DEFINITELY teasing you later once he does get to sleep with you about how cute you are.
This man lives to see you embarrassed and shy from his compliments.
Is probably buying you even MORE plushies now, hope you're prepared for that!
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Leviathan
I think it depends at the point in your relationship, if it's early on he might just toss the plushies aside and get to the point of what he wants.
Later on I do think he genuinely listens, even if he's impatient and pretends like he doesn't care. If it's important to you he does care, just doesn't always show it.
Especially if you use the plushies as a form of comfort due to trauma or any other issues.
You won't even realize how much he paid attention until he refers to your plushies by their names if you accidentally leave them laying around.
However he does still get jealous so so easily so maybe try not to spend too much time at once focusing on them rather than him.
He tries so hard but eventually the jealousy will overtake him and he will just get straight to the sex.
For what it's worth, he still found you cute! He just can't help himself.
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Beelzebub
I'm not gonna lie, you might be able to successfully distract him for a good bit.
Dude's invested in the names and lore and anything you have created for them!!! He likes hearing about it !!!!
He isn't gonna be able to remember every single bit of these details but he might remember some of it here and there. Either way he likes listening to how you talk about them!
That being said he can only sit still for so long so maybe introduce him a little at a time lmao.
Especially because once he DOES start to get distracted he's gonna remember the original reason he was here.
And well. Yeah just like that it's time to fuck!
Because you successfully distracted him for a bit you might be in store for an extra long session this time so! Good luck!
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Lucifer
He listens fully. Wants to hear everything you have to say about them.
He finds the plushies super cute, so he enjoys listening to your ramblings, even if he had certain intentions when he arrived.
But most importantly, he's so endeared, you're so absolutely adorable to him. The way your face lights up when you talk about them, he can't get enough!!!!
So he lets you have your moment.
And when you're finally done is when he's actually gonna fuck you lol. Yeah, that was still happening he had a goal.
And if he's teasing you extra specially tonight, don't even worry about it (whether it be from compliments or degradation who's to say!! just know you're gonna be crying extra hard this time he's so worked up from how cute you are!).
Of course, he remembers every single detail you tell him, he has that shit committed to memory. Asks you questions sometimes to see that adorable look on your face again!
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Belphegor
Goodnight.
He tries to pay attention but he's ready to fall asleep apologies.
He showed up for sex and when it wasn't happening his brain turned off.
That being said the second you realize he's asleep and start trying to wake him up he's on you!!
Like okay conversation done we're fucking now right?
It's just easier to give what he wants and lecture him in the process.
It's fine he tries to listen later. That being said if he invites Beleth to listen too don't worry about it. He totally didn't tell him to memorize details for him because he's probably gonna fall asleep again.
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Asmodeus
Sorry there's just no way to distract this man from sex.
If he's showing up for sex he's here to for sex !!!!
And he WILL get it!!!
If anything he just starts fucking you while holding up the plushies to you and asking you details about them.
Unfortunately you're kinda too fucked out by that point to truly answer them.
He's a fucking menace apologies.
And he cannot be stopped I fear.
That being said any information he does manage to get out of you he does fully remember!!
It's his own weird way of showing affection, ya know?
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astonmartinii · 11 months ago
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a spoonful of sugar part two | oscar piastri social media au
pairing: oscar piastri x fem chef!reader
cheffing it up all over the calendar, here we go again
PART ONE | MASTERLIST | TIP JAR | MY SMALL BUSINESS
yourusername
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yourusername: we're in JAPAN 🇯🇵 WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!! yeah suzuka is cool and all but more importantly - SUSHI TIME and my oh my that spread is glorious if i do say so myself
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user1: oscar babygirlism is so real
landonorris: HOW DARE YOU GUYS INVITE ME OVER FOR DINNER AND SERVE THAT
yourusername: boo fucking hoo, i've had enough of your whining buddy
landonorris: OSCAR STOP HER SHE'S BEING MEAN
oscarpiastri: i mean i would take the home-cooked meal from the professional chef but that's just me
landonorris: stop shaming me :( i can't help it :(
yourusername: okay stop being dramatic, you can comeback from your hiding place i made chicken sushi as well
landonorris: oh thank you 😊
oscarpiastri: when i came in as the YOUNGER teammate, i didn't think y/n and i would be babysitting you
landonorris: you guys love me really
user2: i think y/n might have the patience of a saint
user3: i think i would die happy if i got a sushi spread from y/n
yukitsunoda0511: personally offended i was not invited :(
yourusername: nooooooooooo yukiii :((((( - i'll bring left overs ?
yukitsunoda0511: yes please (i'm much nicer than lando)
landonorris: when will the slander end?
oscarpiastri: i'm personally offended that any time y/n is visiting ME she ends up cooking and looking after all of you :(
yourusername: i love you the most though
oscarpiastri: hehehehehehe
user4: this relationship is so precious to me actually
oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri: over the moon to get my first podium in f1 in my rookie season. p.s. get yourself a girlfriend that gives you a candy bouquet to celebrate your podium
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user5: oscodium i know that's right
mclarenf1: we don't think that's in your meal plan, but we'll let it slide for just this once
yourusername: damn right you will 🔫🔫🔫
oscarpiastri: okay no threatening my team on a post about my podium
yourusername: i guess they're fine (FOR NOW) (the next time i see team orders it's on sight)
mclarenf1: ... does this mean no more pasta parties? :(
yourusername: get my boy his first win and pasta for life for all of you
user6: the way y/n and oscar's mum both fell into each other when oscar crossed the finish line
user7: they're so real for that
user8: y/n is REAL wag representation, i too would go FUCKING mental if my boyf got a podium i would also be spraying champagne all over the garage and crying my eyes out
yourusername: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND I'M SO FUCKING PROUD OF YOU
oscarpiastri: I LOVE YOU MORE, THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS SUPPORTING ME - and looking after my mum after you caused a stampede in the garage
yourusername: hold on nicole is just as crazy as me
oscarpiastri: my two favourite women EVA
user9: when you're besties with your boyf's mum >>
landonorris: congrats oscahhhhhhh - how does one procure one of these bouquets?
oscarpiastri: hands off pal 🤨
landonorris: i just want CANDY STOP ACCUSING ME OF STUFF
yourusername: oh so now you want my food ....
landonorris: why are you ganging up on me ??? I'M JUST A CHILD ???
user10: i love watching oscar and y/n ganging up on lando
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logansargeant
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logansargeant: category is: thirdwheeling - the food is a definite plus
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user12: the real best trio in f1 ... sorry 2019 rookies
alexalbon: logie bear beating the unseasoned allegations... i am impressed
logansargeant: i am cultured?
yourusername: logan had no choice, he was eating what i made him
logansargeant: but i liked it!
yourusername: you did, i'm a proud mother
alexalbon: what are the chances of me and james getting some of the y/n food, we deserve it more than mclaren
yourusername: name the price...
user13: i love how oscar and y/n have collected so many drivers this season despite being the youngest
oscarpiastri: not even finished my first season and we've accumulated so many "children"
logansargeant: don't have a gf who is such a good chef if you didn't want to babysit me
yourusername: we can't help it we're mOTHER
oscarpiastri: 💅
charles_leclerc: @oscarpiastri did our post podium dinner in aus mean nothing? you're neglecting your 26 year old child
maxverstappen1: classic treatment of the eldest girl 😔
yourusername: you guys done being dramatic?
charles_leclerc: one second
charles_leclerc: YOU'RE JUST THE SAME AS EVERYONE ELSE, PICK ME UP AND DROP ME - USERS !!!!
charles_leclerc: okay done :)
oscarpiastri: ok... idk what the fuck is going on here
maxverstappen1: we want food [bangs cutlery on imaginary table]
user14: oscar going from being the shy one on the grid to wrangling charles and max is killing me
user15: him and y/n have the grid wrapped around their finger
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yourusername
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yourusername: this is everything you have ever deserved
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user18: i am going to throw myself on the track and let oscar run me over and put me out of my misery
oscarpiastri: i love you so much, couldn't do it without your support
yourusername: NUH UH you're SUPER DUPER AMAZINGLY FAST and i am lucky to be here to witness you :)
oscarpiastri: okay.... but no more passing out in the garage
yourusername: i'm just a girl 🎀
oscarpiastri: my girl x
yourusername: YOUR GIRL (i've seen the tiktok edits BACK OFF)
user19: the way the other team members and teams let them have their moment was so cute
user20: zak brown pushing her to the front to be able to see him on the podium... maybe i don't hate him as much as i thought
user21: her taking ten billion photos while crying her eyes out was so cute
yourusername: they're all blurry 🧍🏻‍♂️
maxverstappen1: i guess you're the only one i'll tolerate outshining my championship win... congrats oscar!
oscarpiastri: thank you max :) also thank you to gp for giving y/n an ice pack
yourusername: gp got his name on a piece of cake
maxverstappen1: what about my cake?
yourusername: i guess i can spare another slice for you
oscarpiastri: we can give you a whole cake tomorrow if you let me win tomorrow?
maxverstappen1: nice try dude
yourusername: you haven't tried it yet
oscarpiastri: it's laced with crack (literally, DQ coming fast)
maxverstappen1: ????
yourusername: we jest
oscarpiastri: or do we?
user22: is gp another person they've collected?
oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri: no one else i'd rather celebrate with
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user23: they don't know it yet but they're actually my parents
user24: yeah, yeah oscar won a race woo BUT MAMA DROP THE RECIPE FOR THE THIRD SLIDE LOOKS LIKE IT BANGS
yourusername: i'm so unbelievably proud of you oscar, crying in the club right now
oscarpiastri: i didn't know the shower was also called the club (i can hear you crying and though i'm grateful you are this happy for me, it's getting slightly concerning)
yourusername: i just can't contain my excitement for you and it's turned into tears HAPPY TEARS
oscarpiastri: my mum can hear it from her room as well
yourusername: can't believe i'm being shamed like this
landonorris: will you cry this much for my first win
yourusername: nope, actively praying against it
landonorris: WHAT ??? OSCAR STOP HER SHE'S BEEN TOO MEAN THIS TIME
yourusername: i only want oscar to win every race from now until he retires soz buddy
oscarpiastri: idk that sounds like a good deal to me lando
landonorris: @yourusername i hope you drown in your tears
user25: well that escalated
danielricciardo: proud of you baby aussie !!! how can we get some aussie bbq in the paddock as celebration @yourusername 🤭
yourusername: someone get me a grill asap
danielricciardo: okay max it's time to stop being selfish, let oscar win another race so we can get more bbq i'm homesick
maxverstappen1: that's cute and all but FUCK THEM KIDS
yourusername: well no bbq for you then
maxverstappen1: you and oscar love me really
oscarpiastri: ???
user26: the way y/n tussles with these men kills me
user27: at this point get her a microphone and get her on that grid walk
mclarenf1
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mclarenf1: y/n delivered the pasta party she promised (admin is now in a food coma no more posts for the rest of the day)
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user28: the way we all thought this was a joke... i am now unwell
user29: dead ass the cutest thing i've ever seen
yourusername: thank you for having me besties, thank you for giving oscar a fast car and i hope you all actually make your flights in your pasta-induced naps
mclarenf1: that carbonara has me snoozing up a storm
oscarpiastri: (we nearly missed our flight)
landonorris: worth it, that pasta banged
yourusername: why thank you everyone i am blushing
yourusername: but real talk when does all this pasta translate into team orders in oscar's favour
mclarenf1: i don't think that's in my job description
landonorris: ...
oscarpiastri: well....
yourusername: you're making me look like a bad person 😭 i just want oscar to have the best possible time ever
oscarpiastri: i love you <3
landonorris: ugh... i guess that's cute
user30: i have never been more jealous ever in my life and it's over PASTA
georgerussell63: i am mobilising the GDPA against this. it's either pasta for ALL of us or NONE of us
yourusername: bring back seb you big wet wipe
georgerussell63: EXCUSE YOU!
charles_leclerc: i am an honourary italian and i am quite frankly offended i was not at least offered the left overs
oscarpiastri: but this was my special pasta party for my sprint win :(
georgerussell63: don't try and use that very cute and wholesome excuse with me mister, we have been robbed of pasta
yourusername: you queens are so dramatic i can't
user31: this sport is so unserious, they wouldn't protest over the conditions this weekend but pasta is where they draw the line 😭
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yourusername
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yourusername: if you're at COTA come on down to my bbq station it's mr america (@logansargeant) approved
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user33: miss ma'am is really raising the bar for all wags at this point
user34: who else is doing up masterchef at the track
logansargeant: i can confirm it is very good
yourusername: i knew there was a reason we love you logie bear
logansargeant: the ribs were so good you should honestly get an american passport
user35: guys i went and omg IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD + y/n was so fucking nice and said all proceeds are going to helping disadvantaged children get into karting
user36: my heart is so full i love them
maxverstappen1: slowing me down by making me have bbq i see how it is
yourusername: no one forced you to eat it buddy
maxverstappen1: well it's steak and mac and cheese ur dumb if you think i'm NOT fucking it up
yourusername: you got me there
danielricciardo: that was scrummy
charles_leclerc: petition for this to be here every week
georgerussell63: this just makes me more angry about missing out on pasta
user37: oscar is so much stronger than me cause if i had y/n i'd be asking for an absolute feast all of the time and would not stick to my meal plan
oscarpiastri: my favourite person doing her favourite thing <3
yourusername: you're my favourite thing
landonorris: keep that to yourself
yourusername: i can't love my bf now?
landonorris: that man is a child keep it PG
oscarpiastri: you made it not PG
yourusername: stop forcing your agenda on us lando
landonorris: i can't win with you people
oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri: first season done. proud. ready to eat like a king
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user38: i don't think i've ever barked in response to a picture of food
landonorris: where's mineeeeee :((((((((
oscarpiastri: season is over mate. y/n is back to being mine and mine only, we're hibernating in aus
landonorris: selfish
yourusername: let us eat our sushi in peace this off season
user39: oscar ready to keep y/n to himself what a king
oscarpiastri: tired of sharing my gf :( i know she's the bestest ever but still i was getting separation anxiety when she was stolen to make food for george
georgerussell63: no regrets
yourusername: you were always a king, but i'm ready to treat you like royalty
oscarpiastri: right back at you, queen
yourusername: all the food WE want all off season
maxverstappen1: okay guys we can hear you
charles_leclerc: this is no way to talk about your 27 year old children honestly
landonorris: i'm calling childline actually
yourusername: feel free girl, kiss my ass cause you won't see it for months
landonorris: GASP!
oscarpiastri: that's been brewing, stop asking y/n to make you chicken dippers bro
landonorris: :(
yourusername: regardless of all the tomfoolery and the stray cats (drivers) we've picked up, i'm so proud of you oscar - here's to an even better year next year
oscarpiastri: thank you, my love. couldn't do it without you. i love you.
yourusername: i love you too osc
fin.
note: heyyy?? yeah i've kinda gone missing in action. i am working on the last two WIPs but i am so busy and my writers block is so bad i had to revisit an old fave lol. hope yall enjoy !
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sanjisblackasswife · 1 year ago
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(twt link mentioned and linked below)
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Suguru is just so…big.
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Nobody talks about how big he really is.
His white haired bestie may be taller, but Suguru is BIGGER.
Roughly 6’3-4” and his hands are actually larger than Gojo.
He knows how big he is too.
He knows how blessed his body is.
He knows how broad his shoulders and how huge hands are.
Most importantly—
he knows how infatuated you are with his size.
“Stop fucking me with your eyes.” You mumble, back facing him as you lotion your body in front of your bedroom mirror.
You knew it was Suguru, you didn’t have to look up at the mirror to see his huge reflection of him leaning on the door. He smirks, inching closer to you not tearing his eyes away from your thong complementing your pretty ass.
Literally.
“Or what.” His warmed hands cup the bottom of your butt, giving it a loving squeeze and slap, you shriek at the force. He has always been so heavy handed but you smile, “Sleep like this.”
“Like what?”
“Like…” He exhales as he turns you around to face him, even at your height you still had to look up at him, also feeling like a child being scolded he looks down at you briefly before squatting , “This..sleep just like this.”
“Are you crazy it’s freezing—-“
“I’ll keep you warm.” He says plainly, but his voice was lathered in mischief, everytime you sleep with just your panties on with him, somehow and someway they end up on the floor, long gone before falling asleep.
You smirk, almost giving in to his sweet tone, his hands rubbing in your arms, he pauses, giving your tummy a kiss.
“Sugu..” You pathetically moan out after the 4th kiss that led to your clothes crotch. He pecked it once.
twice.
once more.
Before he looked up at you.
He still looked so big, even on his knees.
You brush his bang, his hair felt like silk. His strong arms squeeze under your bottom causing you to be pulled closer to his mouth, he smiles, “Please?”
“Please what…” You tease, Suguru immediately starts to poke his tounge through his cheek seeing you be so amused, “You want me to sleep with no shirt on you little pervert?”
Suguru knew for a while you had a size kink. You always had a specific glint in your eye whenever you looked at him beside you in the mirror, when he carried you with one arm, when he’d pick you up to kiss you, when he fucked you against the wall, when you seen how he dwarfs your hand, the way how you struggle to take just 2 fingers knuckle deep inside you
So you do both.
it was just so much he did to show his size he eventually caught on to how much you loved it.
That being said, whenever you start to get smart mouthed it doesn’t take long until Suguru reminds you—-
“Actually…” Your boyfriend stands up from his position practically rising up and becoming 3 times your size again which you don’t know whether to bite your lip or smirk.
“I want to see you looking down at me eating your pussy.”
“THEN…to see you sleep with no shirt on.”
You wanted to talk back again but without fail he scoops you up, with your body hanging over his shoulder and a swat to your ass that causes you to wince again.
You could fight back, you usually do, but unless you say the safe word you can’t stop him. He has those muscles for a reason,
he is stronger than you.
“Sssshit Sugu—!”
Strong in so many ways for your benefit and his. Like how he has keep your thighs spread using his forearms while his tounge swirls on your tiny clit and his middle and ring finger squelch inside you back and forth.
You can hear his groans whenever you clench down on his digits, he curls them to watch you arch your back up off the pillow he made you lay on for extra support.
His warm brown eyes look at you, how your hands always creep to your nipples to give a tug whenever he eats you out.
“So fucking cute.” Suguru thinks, he loves you so much, but right now he loves your body’s reaction to him even more.
“‘Ganna cum…Suguru…Fuck Suguru!”
You couldn’t squirm away if you wanted his hands now gripping your hips just didn’t allow it.
Suguru was just so strong.
“Ah ah.” He gives your pussy a slap, the wetness of his saliva and your arousal sprays on his finger tips. He damn near groaned at the sound and sight, “Stop moving and let me finish….put your feet on my shoulders…there you go good girl.”
You felt him begin to lift your lower half up off the bed. Still slurping and sucking on your clit you reach to grab anything; pillow, sheets, whatever because at this angle— seeing his bun fall loose and the veins on his arms pop you were close.
So close .
His hands gripped the bottom of your ass, still holding you up kneeding the fat of it.
“Sugu! Suguru Yes! Yes!” Your moans like velvet in his ear as you chant and breath out his name.
Coming down from your high, he still gives you soft kitten licks, they tickle a bit so you trip grip his arm, signaling him to stop but he just glared at you, and winked. Still holding you up you begin to whine.
“Sensitive!”
“Mmmhm.” He pops off your clit, “But I know you still want more.”
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threeacttragedy · 2 months ago
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Entry 11: The One About the Heart of the Ocean
My father is a big history buff. He fancies himself a bit of an expert about the U.S. Civil War, U.S. Presidents, and World War II. In fact, he’s gifted me with the Useless Knowledge of which four U.S. Presidents were assassinated while in office (Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley, and Kennedy – you’re welcome for that little addition to your own Library of Useless Knowledge).
But, more importantly, my dad has instilled in me the importance of a timeline. The idea that, if you’re collecting information, it’s vital to keep it in chronological order, that way you can look at it, (try to) understand it, and theorize about what happened before and after an event. If the facts are out of order, the conclusion you reach may be in error.
My father and I also like to solve True Crime together. When he visits, we spend hours on the porch studying some random, usually cold, true crime event. We timeline the shit out of it, connect the puzzle pieces together, and exclaim in the end, “We’ve solved it!” I suppose that is part of what keeps me interested in Lukola – not that there is anything criminal in Lukola, except perhaps the “Single White Female” that pops up behind Nicola from time to time – I just enjoy the game of trying to put the pieces together.
Lukola has become a rather intriguing puzzle, don’t you think? It’s definitely one to which I do not have all the pieces. I do, however, enjoy collecting the information and chronologizing it, and now I find it enjoyable to scribble my thoughts out on Tumblr.
So, how did I get here?
Well, it started with boredom and ended with a timeline.
My first entry to the timeline?
July 20, 2024.
What happened on that date?
Well, nothing spectacular really, except JVN posted –
HOLD UP!
HOLD THE FUCK UP!!
OH SHIT!!
YES!
YES, you guessed it! After blowing JVN off for at least three, maybe four, posts in a row, I’m finally getting around to dedicating an entire entry to Their Royal Highness.
JVN is such a fascinating creature. I mean, you get beautiful, witty, and intelligent wrapped into one human being. Oh, and they are kind of a catty bitch, too, and who doesn’t love one of those? That’s why they're the Heart of the Ocean on the USS Lukola; they just give off this very rare blue diamond vibe. Well, that, and because something they did marks the focal point – the heart – from which the rest of my timeline branches.
*I will cut in here to note that I am referring to JVN as they/their in this entry as their Instagram bio indicates they accept “they/he/she.”
Okay, back to July 20.
On that date, JVN posted to TikTok their version of the Charli xcx “Apple” dance. You know that annoying TikTok trend that took over our summer? Yeah, that’s the one – the same one Antonia tried doing – she just couldn’t pull off the JVN version of it. Dear girl couldn’t come close to matching JVN’s “enthusiasm,” and JVN’s version was only made more enjoyable in that they were seemingly mocking Antonia!
But, all’s fair in love and war, right?
JVN’s bestie, Nicola, had already spent the entire summer subtlety combating Antonia over social media. The vibe in the fandom was that Antonia was always trying to one-up Nicola, with Nicola always coming out the victor. I’m sorry, Antonia, you just can’t beat some perfectly timed BTS drops.
So, why did JVN’s TikTok post intrigue me? It wasn’t because it was that amusing. It was because they’d done something I hadn’t noticed before – they’d taunted Antonia on a public forum.
Curious, that.
Now, I’m not saying it was the first time JVN mocked Antonia, but July 20 was the first time I noticed it. That date is the heart of my timeline, but it does not have to be the heart of yours. We can all start at different times but still reach the same conclusions, so long as we keep the information in order.
You would think one wouldn’t mess with the “girl friend” of your best friend’s “best friend,” at least not publicly. But, here was JVN shamelessly mocking Antonia on TikTok. And, just so we’re clear, the public opinion of what JVN was doing with this TikTok is available to view in the comments of their TikTok post. It wasn’t just me that came to this conclusion – and JVN has left these comments up for four months at this point.
JVN’s “Apple” dance was only made more interesting the following day – July 21 – when they included it in their Sunday Dump post on Instagram.
And, Nicola liked it.
Hmm, things were becoming curiouser and curiouser.
Let’s not even pretend that Nicola isn’t street savvy and didn’t understand the context of that video. And, let’s definitely not underestimate the length of her claws.
To be honest, I hadn’t paid too much attention to Lukola since mid-June. It was an “it is what it is” thing for me. Even though I believed the relationship between Luke and Nicola was complicated (see my first blog for that story), Luke had also apparently disappeared into the summertime sun with his friend group, which included Antonia.
Something about JVN openly making fun of Antonia, and Nicola, at the very least acknowledging it with an Instagram like, made me realize something in Luke’s situation must be shifting.
What have I said about little changes? That deviations in modus operandi are what make people start giving the side-eye to a situation.
And, side-eye I did!
I started paying attention to JVN and, on July 25, they posted a series of photos on TikTok and Instagram showcasing “What I would wear if you invited me to your…” We will fast-forward through all the slides until we get to the last one, which read, “…just got dumped and going to take 8 shots dinner at Lupe’s in SoHo.” Was it possible that JVN was hinting at a dumpster fire at the Soho Farmhouse?
If you don’t know what the Soho Farmhouse is, it’s the place where Luke and his friend group, including Antonia, frequented, probably on Luke’s dime (*insert wicked laugh – oh, and a disclaimer that this is all speculation).
Funny that Nicola liked this post on Instagram, too, and it wasn’t even buried in a Sunday Dump.
At this point, JVN had really sparked my damn interest. Like, dear one, what are you hinting at?
On July 29, Deux Moi creeped out from under its rock and reminded the fandom to hate Luke by rehashing Papsmear. Thank you, we needed that. I mean, half of us almost forgot how much we hated him! That’s me being a sarcastic tart, by the way. If we were to fast-forward to today, I’d argue that Luke was the most darling thing to come out of Bridgerton.
Any ways, again, thank you, Deux Moi, for those suspiciously timed Papsmear pictures because they aligned perfectly with the pap pictures People dropped the following day – July 30.
Yep, I am talking about those strangely awkward pap pictures of Luke hanging out in the murky waters of Sorrento with Antonia. Oh, and let’s not forget the video footage of that encounter, which I am sure still upsets and confuses people to this day. In fact, I know it does because, as I was researching this, I had a couple of people get annoyed after I asked them to view it. Funny thing is, that shit never bothered me (I didn’t say that it didn’t later confuse me!). The first time I saw them, I was like, “Luke is not into that girl at all,” and my next thought was, “I wonder how old these pictures are because I would have sworn JVN was hinting at something.”
Now, this story wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t address the rumor portion of it.
First rumor? That Antonia set up the entire Italy pap photo-op because she seemingly knew where to find the cameraman. So, let’s discuss that video everyone seems to hate to acknowledge exists. In the video, you can see Antonia maybe looking in the direction of the cameraman. She then leans into Luke, either to whisper something to him or to reach for something behind him. In my opinion – and this is strictly my opinion – it looks like she’s pretending to reach for something over his shoulder. Still shots of this interaction are the photos People published, presumably because Luke and Antonia looked like they were cheek to cheek.
Okay, notice I said, “first rumor,” because, yeah, there’s a second rumor, too! But, it fits snuggly into that first rumor. Almost immediately – because that’s how fast the Lukola Sleuths get to work around here – rumors began to circulate that Antonia was following on Instagram the photographer that took the Italy pap pictures. In fact, several people I’ve spoken to swear that they witnessed during a TikTok Live a host prove that Antonia was following this photographer. That’s a bit suspicious, isn’t it? Yeah, it fucking is.
Let’s keep moving.
That same day, we had that video drop of Luke watching fireworks, at night, with sunglasses. Speaking of sunglasses, I guess Luke found those motherfuckers because he sure as shit didn’t have them while floating around in that dirty ass water. Any ways, at the end of the video, Rory appears behind Luke, looking in the direction of the camera and smiling like a condescending, sneaky little shit. Now, who was the cameraman? Well, a possible suspect would be Antonia since she was not seen in the video. Go figure.
Alright, so that day finally ended and on July 31, JVN posted to TikTok a cutesy video of themself at the market titled, “When you catch someone trying to sneak a pic but you were born for these moments.” They prance around the market and randomly look at the cameraman (Mark) with a smile and a pose. The caption reads, “I welcome sneaky pics but I can’t guarantee I won’t sneak some back or put on a show for you.”
WAIT A MINUTE!
Did JVN just inexplicably confirm Luke was getting papped by his own friends?
Yeah, I kind of think JVN did.
And, Nicola liked this one as well when JVN posted it to Instagram on August 8.
Didn’t I tell you JVN was a fascinating creature? And, to be honest, JVN only gets better as this Lukola ship continues on its voyage.
Oh, strangely enough, a few days after the Italy pap crap, Luke returned to London alone. The friend group became unsettlingly silent, and Nicola started to get really, really loud – Chaos Week was incoming! And, so were some more JVN crumbs (and nicely timed clap backs).
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virescent-v · 7 months ago
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Summary: This is a shitty combination of two prompts I've had sitting in my inbox for awhile now. "Take your top off and open another bottle of wine for mommy" from Paget during a Drunk History episode and one where Emily teases reader in public. A/N: Idk how I feel about this one besties. The idea took hold and then this happened. If it's bad, I blame it on the fact that I haven't written/posted anything in months...and also my adhd running rampant during this writing session. But it did feel good to get words on a doc and to send it out to the internet void. Enjoy!
Warnings: It's smut! (Surprise, surprise! lol). If there are any typos, don't tell me Word count: 2.3k
When Emily cornered you in your bedroom before leaving for the restaurant, pressing your back against your vanity, you thought she was just going to kiss you senseless, leave you breathless, a taste of what’s to come later when you got back home. 
What you didn’t expect was for her to be kissing up your neck, whispering all the things she wants to do to you, as her fingers found their way up under your tight, little, skirt. 
With your head tilted back, each choking breath stuttering from your mouth, you tried to speak, to tell Emily you were going to be late to your reservation, but it didn’t seem like she was bothered by that fact. 
“I want to try something tonight, love,” she whispered against the shell of your ear. You weren’t even sure you could speak with how much she had already gotten you worked up, so you simply, albeit shakily, nodded. 
Emily pulled back from you, a wicked smirk plastered on her face. She reached around you to an unremarkable box on your vanity that you had missed earlier. Slowly, she pulled the lid off, each second seemingly passing with each breath you took. 
When the lid finally popped off, Emily glanced up at you, now a little more cautious than she was a few moments ago. Peeking inside, you could see a dark purple bullet vibrator nestled inside a cocoon of velvet. 
Pulling her bottom lip between her teeth, Emily hesitated, her eyes on the toy. Running her finger lightly over the smooth, silky-like silicon, she whispered, “I want you to wear this. To dinner. It comes with a remote for me to control. We’ve never talked about doing something like this, so you have every right to say no.” 
Her eyes met yours. In them, you could see her want for this, but more importantly, her want for you to feel comfortable with doing something like this. Emily usually took lead with things like this, but you were always the one actually in charge. 
Leaning in, you kissed her slowly, pouring every ounce of want and love into it. Leaning back, you took a deep breath. “I want to. I trust you, Em. I know you’ll stop if I need or want to and you’d never put me, or us, in any harmful situation.” 
Emily released the breath she seemed to be holding, a smile spreading across her mouth. “You’re right. Now, panties off, angel.” 
*** 
Maybe this had been a bad idea. 
You were barely able to string together sentences to answer the questions that the waiter kept asking you in regards to your food and order. You were pretty sure that your cheeks had been flushed since you entered the building. 
Emily was a master at playing with you -  with playing with the remote that was nestled in her pocket. She’d turn the settings to different vibrational patterns, watching as your breathing would match the pace that the toy set inside you. She paid close attention to the way the faster settings would have you gripping the edge of the table, the way the pulsating settings made you squirm in your seat. A combination of both would have you biting your lip in hopes of stifling the moans that wanted to escape. 
You didn’t know what was hotter; the way you could feel yourself getting wetter and wetter with each quiver of the toy inside you, or the way Emily leaned back in her seat, enjoying the view of you trying to hold yourself together. 
Being so skilled at reading your body language, Emily knew exactly when you were reaching the precipice, ready to topple over the edge right there at the table. 
The problem, however, is that she wouldn’t let you. 
Worse, you couldn't even ask for her to let you cum. Every time you tried, your voice got strangled in your throat, caught between a moan and a curse that you had to swallow so as to not make your situation…obvious to the other patrons at the restaurant. 
Thankfully, when your food finally arrived, Emily took pity on you and turned the vibrator completely off. 
“How are you doing, pretty girl?” 
You almost wanted to roll your eyes. Almost. “You know exactly how I’m doing, Em.” 
Emily chuckled. “I sure do, but I enjoy hearing you say it anyways.” 
You were starting to feel a little…bratty… from the fact that you hadn’t been able to cum yet and the fact that you weren’t even sure when you would be allowed to. 
But two could play this game. 
With an almost bored, casual tone, you picked at your nails as you said, “I’m so wet, I’m not entirely sure it hasn’t gone through my dress yet. I love the feel of the toy inside me, but I wish it was your fingers or your strap instead.” 
You watched as Emily blinked a few times, her mouth agape, not anticipating you responding like that. You knew how much she loved it when you talked dirty, but she didn’t expect you to say it like that, nor in such a public place. 
She cleared her throat as you took slight pleasure in the fact that you had her flustered for once this evening. “Mind your words, princess. I can edge you even after we get home,” she said, her eyebrow raised. 
Part of you wanted to push back, lean into the bratty headspace you could feel yourself drifting into. But you knew Emily and that tone of voice. She wasn’t kidding. One time, she edged you for hours and still didn’t let you cum. Then proceeded to not let you cum for days. You didn’t want a repeat of that experience. 
“Yes, ma’am,” you mock saluted. 
Emily just smiled, amused at your antics, and continued to eat. 
You weren’t sure what to make of it; you expected her to fire back with some other quick-witted, snarky, sexy response. It kind of tilted you off axis, not sure of what happened. 
You decided to ignore it, picking up your fork to continue eating. However, once the food was on your fork and halfway to your mouth, Emily turned the vibrator on to its highest setting. The surprise vibrations sent your fork clunking back onto the table, drawing the gaze of a few other patrons. 
“Emily,” you hissed under your breath, your jaw clenched, as you tried to gesture an apology to the people sitting near you. 
Another smirk graced her pretty face. “Hurry up and finish eating, love. I want to enjoy dessert at home,” she said with a wink. 
*** 
You weren’t sure you were walking straight. Every few steps Emily would change the vibration pattern and it would cause your knees to buckle. If you stopped to regain your balance, or to breathe through the pleasure, Emily would turn the vibrator off completely. Even though they were absolutely ruined, you were thankful for your lace panties. Otherwise, you’re not sure the toy would even still be inside you with how wet you were. 
Reaching the door, you fumbled with your keys, struggling to find the right one, and struggling further to get it in the slot to turn the lock. 
You heard Emily chuckling lowly behind you. 
Finally getting the door open, you rushed inside, throwing your stuff on the small table by the door and kicking your shoes off. 
Turning around as Emily shut the door behind her, you went to pull her towards you, but she put her hand up. 
“I meant it when I said I wanted dessert at home, love,” she said, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the kitchen. 
You wanted to whine. You wanted to scream. You were so pent up you didn’t think you were going to be able to last another minute, let alone however long it took for Emily to eat whatever dessert she had in mind. 
You kept your mouth shut, figuring it was better to play along with her plan than to cause more issues for yourself later. 
Walking to the fridge, Emily pulled out a small cheesecake that you hadn’t known about. She grabbed plates and cutlery, serving you both small slices. Before you could start on yours, Emily’s hand went up again stopping you. “Uh uh, wait a second. Do me a favor and take your shirt off and open up a bottle of wine for mommy,” she smirked, licking her fork of the smooth dessert. 
You gulped, walking over to the wine fridge and pulling out a wine you knew went well with desserts. You pulled the glasses down, pouring a healthy amount into each. Before turning around, you slowly unbuttoned your blouse before sliding it off of your shoulders. You unhooked your bra and let that fall to the floor as well. Grabbing the wine glasses, you turned around, watching as Emily looked you up and down. 
You sauntered up to her, placing the glasses on the table. You waited until she looked up at you from her chair before you slowly unzipped your skirt, letting gravity take it to the ground. You watched as Emily’s hands flexed as if she wanted to reach out to you, but she managed to refrain. She licked her lips before looking back up at you. 
Pushing her legs together, you straddled her lap. As you sat down fully, you sharply inhaled as your laced covered cunt made contact with Emily’s dress pants. The urge to grind down, to feel the friction where you needed it most, overtook you. 
You got a few good rolls of your hips in before Emily’s hands shot out to your body, grabbing harshly at your waist. Even the bruising pressure of her fingers on your skin was turning you on further, a desperate mewl escaping your lips. 
“Such a desperate whore for me, hm? Couldn’t even wait until I finished my cheesecake.” 
You pulled your lip between your teeth, struggling in Emily’s grasp to move your hips. You were tired of playing her game, not even bothering to disagree with her. “I need to cum, please, Em,” you begged, your beautiful eyes trying their hardest to convince her. 
“Fine, if you want to be so needy, you can cum. But I’m not going to touch you.” 
Your eyes blew wide, watching as Emily pulled the remote back out of her pocket immediately pressing buttons to turn on one of the fastest, pulsating modes. 
Your hands shot out to her shoulders, your head falling back as a nearly obscene moan tumbled from your mouth. “Fuck.” Your hips started to move once more, the friction of the lace against your swollen clit hitting just right. 
“Go ahead, baby. Get yourself off on my lap.” Ignoring what she said moments earlier, unable to resist how tantalizing you looked, Emily’s hands started moving around your body, her fingers trailing over your sweat-slicked skin. They grabbed at your hips, forcing you down, making you grind faster before gripping your ass. She trailed them up, caressing the soft skin of your belly, trailing up to your heaving breasts, fondling your stiff peaks. Her hands never stayed in one spot long, as if she couldn’t decide where she wanted to touch you, as if she wished she had more than two hands. 
“Fuck, look at you. Riding me so well.” Emily brought her lips to your neck. “You look so pretty like this, flushed and needy and mine.” 
You couldn’t stop the moans from escaping. Each grind down - and back and forth - of your hips had your pussy clenching harder around the toy. With each movement of your body, you could feel yourself getting wetter and wetter, if it was even possible. You could smell your arousal, so strong from hours of Emily teasing you.
The toy felt so good inside of you, each buzz and pulse sent tingles through your body and down your spine, each vibration igniting a fire deep within your belly. 
You could quickly feel yourself getting close, the constant edging doing most of the work for you. It likely wouldn’t be your best orgasm - you meant it when you said you’d rather have her fingers or her cock - but something, at this point, was better than nothing. 
“Come on, baby. Come all over my lap so I can take you upstairs and clean you up with my mouth.” 
The vision of Emily between your legs, thighs wrapped around her face, with her tongue licking at your drenched cunt was enough to send you over the edge, Emily’s name repetitively falling from your lips like a broken prayer. 
As you came down, Emily stroked your hair away from your face, peppering small kisses over any part of you that she could reach. She kept whispering affirmations, things you’d heard a thousand times, but would hear a million more. 
You don’t know what you did to deserve a love as grand as Emily Prentiss, but you weren’t going to question it. 
Pulling back from you, Emily looked at you with all the love in the world. “How does a bath sound?” 
You tilted your head a bit, raising your eyebrow at her. “What happened to you cleaning me up with your tongue?” 
Tapping your hip lightly, signaling for you to get up off of her lap, Emily snickered lightly. “You have until I get upstairs to be naked and on your hands and knees, pretty girl.” 
You kissed her lightly on the cheek, a mischievous grin on your face, before racing up the stairs. 
“Oh! And leave the toy in!” She called after you. 
She heard a faint moan - or was it a groan? - echo down the stairs, an almost evil smirk breaking out across her face. 
Looks like that orgasm was just the appetizer of the evening. 
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revelboo · 2 months ago
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I gotta know. Is there a whirl model? You whirl fic made me go digging my local library for the comics. And whirl is very much my fave.
Like. The giblins in my head coming up with stupid impulses, and Whirl instead of ignoring his outright listens to them.
I wanna be whirl.
XD
Also honk honk love your writing
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Thanks! Whirl figures? There’s a couple versions floating around, but they’re a bit cursed
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Delirium
IDW Whirl x Reader
• “I think we got off on the wrong ped,” he says, watching the human dangling from where he’s got you by the back of your coverings spin when you try to kick him in the face. Again. There’s something admirable about that unfettered level of anger. And the swearing. Like a little him, raging at the world. “It’s like looking in a squishy mirror.”
• Fear and anger tangling inside you, you’re wearing yourself out trying to hit him. But unfortunately your new friend learned his lesson and is holding you up and away from that giant optic. Falling into a sullen silence, you wonder if you can pull a shoe off and nail him in the face before he can dodge. It’s tempting. The shortest of the mechs at what seems to be an alien bar is watching you and your captor with an expression like he wants to intervene. Or maybe it’s more like a bystander gawking at a train wreck.
• “You can call me Whirl and I’ll call you Punchy.” And those eyes narrow, mouth opening and he waves his claws in from of your face to shush you. “Uh uh. How do you feel about small, cramped spaces. Specifically vents, Punchy?” Because his new bestie is just the right size to sneak into Brainstorm’s lab and, more importantly, let him in with all those untested and morally questionable weapons the lunatic has been making. It’s enough to send a shiver through him and warm his spark. He just needs to get around the bit where you get down from the vent to the floor without dying. Maybe some rope?
• Is he serious? Or just completely deranged, because the looks on the faces of the other bar patrons suggest deranged, but they’re still not moving to help you. “If you shove me in a vent, I’ll find a way to crawl under your plating and tear out your soft bits with my teeth,” you threaten not even sure if he has any soft bits, before giving in and lobbing a shoe at his face.
• “Careful, bestie. I might enjoy that,” he says, shifting his grip around your middle and slowly spinning in a circle. Watching your eyes squint shut, jaw clenching. You really are too cute, snarling at him to hide the fear. Just a little him, refusing to give up. Because to surrender is death.
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Text
🏁 Winner, winner, chicken dinner - EO31
SUMMARY: Social media au, y/n is an f1 driver for porsche. 2 best friends finally get a clue. PAIRING: Esteban ocon x fem!reader
Y/N13
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Y/N13 Proud of porsche 🖤
Sorry to end silly season before it begins, but here's to another year!
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Estebanocon how long did that take you to think of?
↳ Y/N13 dont...
↳ User1 not him exposing her like that 💀
User2 yesss! Our queen is slaying staying
PorscheF1 We'd want no one else! 🔥💛
↳ alex_albon do I mean nothing to you?
↳ Y/N13 I love you Porsche admin 😍😍
↳ PorscheF1 😳
↳ Estebanocon stop flirting with the poor admin
↳ landnorris jealous? 🤨
↳ User5 ok Grandpa, lets get you into bed
User3 Can't wait to watch next weeks gp
User4 I'm taking time off work to watch next weeks grand prix! Cant wait to see you smash it, Hungary here i come!!
User5 She's such a porsche girly, I'm living for it
User6 I dont want, I NEED that jacket
↳ User5 ikr, its GORGEOUS
Estebanocon
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Estebanocon I don't know what to write I'm lost for words we just won the Hungarian @ f1GrandPrix i will forever remember this moment!!🔥 Thank you to @ alpinef1team, without them I would not have made it, and what a drive by the legend himself @ fernandoalo_oficial he's part of this too
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alpinef1team 🔥🔥
↳ User6 alpine fr love their fire emojis
↳ alpinef1team 🔥
Y/N13 King of long captions and king of the podium!
↳ Estebanocon let me celebrate in peace
↳ User5 Mum help, they're flirting again
↳ User7 you are delulu
User8 You only got that win cause of Fernando clown 🤡
User9 💩
User10 Not the toxic Fernando fan boys in the comments 💀
fernandoalo_oficial Congrats 😁👍
↳ Estebanocon next win is yours 😉
Y/N13 added to her story!
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Y/N13 Estie my bestie, we party like no others.
Reply...
landonorris I was there too you know
Y/N13 🥱
landonorris Of course you're only focused on him
Y/N13 whats that supposed to mean?
landonorris nothinggggg ;)
lando.jpg
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lando.jpg Podium pals 😎
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User11 She looks like a godess... And they're... there.
Y/N13 Did Estie dirty there lmao
↳ lando.jpg Estie? interesting
↳ User5 HA he's so us
User6 lando got those moves 🕺
Estebanocon It was a great night to end a great day
mclaren looking good Lando! 🔥
charles_leclerc This is charles erasure
↳ lando.jpg Next time dont DNF then 🤷‍♂️
↳ User15 He didnt 💀
User14 Ocon embracing the squirrel
F1gossip
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F1gossip seems it's not just lando norris who got tired during the Belgian GP! Y/n L/n and Esteban Ocon caught snuggling up during the red flag
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User5 INTERESTING
User15 They're childhood friends, obviously they're comfy with eachother
↳ User16 Let us L/nOcon shippers live in delusion ok
User17 When is it my tuuuurn
User18 why is no one talking about how cute lando looks
User19 Lando in the liiiikes??
↳ User20 He's the #1 f1 gossiper, of course he's in the likes
Y/N13
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Y/N13 And thats how you celebrate P2
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User16 Who's the person you're playing uno with?
↳ landonorris Ocon obviously
↳ User1 More importantly who won
↳ User3 As if Y/n would ever let a man beat her
Liked by Y/N13
↳ User8 She did in the race today
↳ User5 You did NOT, thats FOUL
Estebanocon I'm not accepting this slander, I beat her
↳ Y/N13 LIES
maxverstappen1 Congrats on P2, offended you didn't come out partying with us
↳ Y/N13 But merlin...
↳ User15 She's so real for choosing to watch her fave show instead of going out partying
PorscheF1 p1 here we come! 🏆🔥
↳ User21 why do all admins love the fire emoji?
↳ PorscheF1 🔥
↳ mclaren 🔥
↳ alpinef1team 🔥
landonorris You watched merlin WITHOUT ME???
↳ Y/N13 sucks to suck ig
↳ landonorris :(
User6 Her celebrating her podium with him instead of the rest of the grid 😚
↳ User10 It's so cute
↳ User22 I dont get it, are they dating
↳ landonorris not yet
↳ User5 He ships it harder than us i swear
User23 Soft launch?
↳ User24 They're BEST FRIENDS, this is not a soft launch 😭
Y/N13
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Y/N13 Happy birthday Estie bestie, 15 in a caravan turned to 25 in an f1 car so quick 🖤
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Estebanocon I hate you
↳ Y/N13 you love meeee
↳ landnorris Just kiss already pls
Liked by Estebanocon
↳ User5 Ayo?
User17 The media team did NOT see this one looool
User5 Bestie, the last pic I-
User23 I love it when me and my bestfriend cuddle all platonic style, jokingly flirt and have date nights... girl who you fooling?
User18 He's so baby girl
User15 They're in love
↳ User24 You're delusional (I believe you)
Y/N13
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Y/N13 Winner winner chicken dinner, what more can I say?
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User5 How about explaining that kiss!!??!?!
PorscheF1 Could not be prouder.
User25 Girl, WHAT does that mean?
landonorris Next step, first ever joint championship 😎
↳ Y/N13 in your dreams buddy
↳ landonorris i dont deserve this
Estebanocon We only know how to win
charles_leclerc Best person to share a podium with
↳ maxverstappen1 What am i?
↳ charles_leclerc a pain
F1gossip
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F1gossip Passionate displays from Y/n after her first Grand prix win, rushing off the podium to kiss childhood friend Esteban Ocon. Does this reveal a secret side to their relationship? Or was it a heat of the moment decision?
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User5 WE WON
User24 The pining is overrrr
User22 Y/n and Esteban finally getting together WAS on my 2021 bingo card!
↳ User26 Be honest, how many years has it been on there?
↳ User22 ....
Estebanocon
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Liked by landonorris, Y/N13 and others
Estebanocon the spider to my man
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Y/N13 you think you're smooth
↳ Estebanocon the smoothest
Y/N13 finally get to say i love youuuuuuu (in a non platonic way!!)
↳ Estebanocon I'll help you reach any apple you want
↳ User20 everyday i wake up knowing ill never have this
User6 I have to know, @ landonorris how much of this was you?
↳ landonorris at least 60%
↳ User14 Only 60?
↳ landonorris the pining was crazy
Y/N13
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Liked by alex_albon, Estebanocon and others
Y/N13 finally got a clue
Estebanocon only took 20 years
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maryleclerc · 1 year ago
Text
𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧
pairing: charles leclerc x reader ; carlos sainz x reader
face-claim: gigi hadid
summary: in which after knowing about reader pregnancy, charles decided to make everything right.
warning: mention of pregnancy, exes!, paparazzi. use google translate,swearing. english is not my native language! does not have any pregnancy experience!
so i’ll made this mini series with 2 ending, one will be reader end with charles and other one will end with carlos (ofc if reader end up with carlos which mean the reason why reader and charles broke up will change too)
more importantly: reader you can suggest any baby girl name too!! or baby boy idk 😩🙏 also suggest some drama and stuff ideas!!
if you wanted to add into taglist please reply or dm me
read part 01
yourusername
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yourusername With my bestie! @/carlossainz55
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carlossainz55 Bestieeee
yewenmitle Love their friendship already!!!
roseross How can they be so cute not even trying
⤷ yourusername Born natural 🥸
dailypaparazzi
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2,799,678 likes
dailymail Y/n Y/l/n and Carlos Sainz spotted having a cozy dinner in Monaco
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friendsaddictedd Oooh sound ✨ROMANTIC✨
kiearre She looks serious tho, her face
livinginthedprm Everybody saying Carlos has a crush on Y/n. HE DESERVE TO BE LOVE TOO!! they would be so cute together
f1lovelifeupdates
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58,510 likes
f1lovelifeupdates Charles Leclerc has confirmed that he and Megan have broken up a months ago, after 2 months of dating. And he also confirmed that his ex-girlfriend, Y/n, is pregnant with their first child.
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haileylee Ok, I don’t really care about them… all I need to know is Charles know about the baby?
charlessbaby I missed them so much!!!
ppeeeepss Megan, she’s wonderful, pretty and talent how can this happen. I just hope he’s not get back with Y/n
⤷ lovensfw Honey, we know but he’s a grown man so I think it is very important to know what’s ‘responsibility’ mean 😀 also Y/n’s PERFECTLY FINE!!!
yourusername
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yourusername 👶👩‍🍼💞
Hello everyone!
Recently, there have been photos of me and of course, photos of me pregnant that were unintentionally leaked. And that's also the reason why I spoke up about this, (why do I sound so serious, haha) anyway, it's been a while and it's time to share with you guys.
Since you love me, you deserve me to share your joys with you. Yes, I'm pregnant and my baby is 8 months old!! time flies, since the day I announced that I would take a temporary break for a while because I felt OVERWHELM, that actually was the time I wanted to devote all my time to taking care of myself as well as my baby, prepare to be a mommy. And I am truly grateful to all of you who have sent me kind words and wishes, I truly appreciate it!!
Love you all so much! Also, I still don't know what to name our baby, so I need your suggestions
IT’S A GIRL!! (reader also can suggest a name too!!)
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lolamckaylee Congrat to you Y/n
_josephinee Who’s the baby daddy?
⤷ ynsqueen It’s Charles Leclerc
⤷ _josephinee Wait I thought he dating someone else, and knock her up?
⤷ johnsongreen HIM AND MEGAN BROKE UP!!
carlossainzstuff_
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1,681 likes
carlossainzstuff_ Carlos has mention Y/n on today “We asked Carlos Sainz what F1 fan really want to know” by P1 with Matt & Tommy.
Tommy asked Carlos if he knew that F1 fans were very curious about the relationship between Carlos and Y/n after the photos taken by paparazzi when they spend sometime at Monaco.
TOMMY: Did you know that every F1 fan here wanted to know if you and Y/n are a thing?
CARLOS: We’re bestfriend, bff
TOMMY: But there are also had that one question that has been ask alot that’s “Are having a crush on Y/n?”
CARLOS: It’s really hard to not fall for her, she’s so kind and everything. Everybody love her, how can I not
TOMMY: Yea, It’s true. And you also know that she’s pregnant right?
CARLOS: She look espléndida
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carloswifee He’s madly in love with her, NOT crushes, just LOVE
yncarlossainzs The way his eyes look at them when they mention of Y/n is wholesome, he talk about her like a proud boyfriend
ferarrilovrs__ Thinking of when they’re really dating, ahh I can’t stop kicking my feet!!
carlossainzsidechick SOMEONE KISS HIM ON THE FOREHEAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!
[ to be continue ]
( taglist ) @janeholt3 @formulas-bitch @celestialams @aundercover
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diamond-champagne · 7 months ago
Text
5. I Need You
Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd
warnings: none but let me know!
feedback is always welcome, besties <3
Enjoy!!
December 2023
The UConn Women’s Basketball Team is celebrating at Ted’s on Thursday. The team is going into their Holiday break on a winning streak. Final exams are finally over. That and the overall giddiness from the holidays makes the team extra cheerful. The alcohol is flowing steadily and their table is buzzing with laughter.
Azzi is sitting at their shared table with her arm around Riley. The two are engaging in a conversation with Nika about Christmas movies when Aubrey yells “Y’all look at PB blushing like a schoolgirl”. The group immediately turns their attention to the blonde whose attention is currently being occupied by a man. He’s got a few inches on the basketball player, standing at a full 6’6. The man in question has caramel skin and Azzi can tell that he has at least half a sleeve on his right arm.
The group watches them interact. It’s obvious from his body language that he’s talking loudly so that Paige will hear him over the music playing. Whatever he says must be funny because the girl tosses her head back in laughter. It also must be complementary because she blushes harder. A smile graced her lips. Azzi can tell that she isn’t sure how to accept whatever compliments he’s dishing her.
It doesn’t matter though because he’s still talking to Paige. The mystery man is in the middle of doing said talking when he reaches for the basketball player’s waist. He pulls her closer so he can lean down to talk in her ear and she let’s him.
The two are completely unaware that they have an audience until they are about to part ways. Azzi watches them switch phones to seemingly exchange phone numbers when she catches Paige’s eyes. Her eyes widen and she blushes some more before scurrying back to the table with the rest of the group. She’s greeted with whoops, praise, and many variations of “Get it, Paige” before she sits down.
“Paige Madison, who was that?” Ice asked.
“His name is Cam. He’s on the football team.” Paige smiles.
“And what did this Cam say to have you smiling like that?” KK asks excitedly.
The blonde shrugs, trying to be nonchalant. The smile itching its way on her face betrays her. “He just called me pretty. I don’t know! He’s just nice.”
Azzi decides then that doesn’t like Cam. She doesn’t like his tattoos or that he plays football. She also thinks his name is stupid.
More importantly, Azzi doesn’t like he talked to Paige more in a 10 minute conversation that they have in weeks. She doesn’t like he pulled the older girl closer to him in a bar full of people. Azzi hates that Paige seemed to enjoy it because there was a time that she was pulling Paige closer in a bar full of people. Azzi hasn’t done that in a very long time.
That thought angers Azzi. She’s angry at herself for letting them get this messy. She’s angry at Paige for not fighting harder. She’s angry at Cam for doing all the things she couldn’t; all the things she wouldn’t.
It’s the anger that fuels her next comment.
“So it’s that easy, huh, Paige? We just have to call you pretty?”
The entire group, including Riley, looks at Azzi in shock. She doesn’t care about that, though. She cares about the look that Paige gives her. It’s a combination of shock, hurt, and embarrassment.
She just humiliated her best friend in front of everyone.
The worst part is that Paige doesn’t even argue back with her. She just looks down at her fingers and remains silent.
Azzi starts to apologize but before she can, Riley is pulling her out of the bar. The volleyball player only stops tugging her arm when they are alone, standing in a secluded section of the parking lot.
“What. The. Fuck. Was. That?” Azzi flinches unintentionally. She’s never seen the other so upset. The brown-eyed girl opens her mouth to speak but stops immediately as the other has raised her hand to communicate that she isn’t done.
“You’ve been off for fucking weeks. At first I thought I was crazy but then I saw how you reacted when Paige invited Blaire to Aubrey’s house.” Riley scoffed but then continued. “I knew you had feelings for her. I should’ve known better.”
Azzi immediately begins to apologize, “I’m so sorry-”. Riley doesn’t want to hear it. “You’re an asshole; and not just to me. What you said in there was fucking disgusting. Paige didn’t deserve that.”
The basketball player nods in agreement and understanding. She doesn’t trust herself to speak anymore. She doesn’t even know what she would say.
“I know, bu-” Riley cuts her off again. “You clearly don’t know, Azzi, because judging by the face Paige made, this isn’t the first time you’ve hurt her either.”
Azzi doesn’t know what to say, so she says nothing and watches as the volleyball player turns to leave. The basketball player turns to walk back inside Ted’s hoping that she gets the opportunity to apologize to her best friend.
That hope quickly deflates when she realizes that Paige isn’t there.
“Where did she go?” She asked desperately.
“She left.” KK answers. Azzi doesn't miss the glare that the freshman throws her way.
“Where did she go?”
“Azzi, maybe that’s not a good idea.” Caroline states carefully.
“Where did she go?” Azzi frustratedly repeats. Her patience is wearing thin. She needs to see Paige because for the first time since she’s known her, Azzi feels their friendship slipping away. Azzi knows that their friendship had changed; but she never thought that there would be a day when it was over. That can’t happen. Azzi needs Paige.
“She went home.” KK says suddenly. Her confession elicits looks from her teammates. Azzi assumes that they weren’t supposed to say anything. She doesn't care though because she’s leaving Ted’s before anyone can tell her otherwise.
-
Paige watches as Riley drags Azzi out the bar; waiting until they are completely out of sight before getting up to leave. The blonde-haired girl can feel her eyes fill with tears and quickly blinds rapidly to keep them at bay.
“Hey, I’m gonna head out.” Paige announces before getting up from her seat. There’s a chorus of protest from her teammates but all she wants to do is get home; preferably before she starts sobbing in the bar.
“Paige,” Carol starts. “Be careful.” Paige nods and leaves the bar.
She makes it all the way home and through the door before she breaks down. Paige doesn’t make it to her room; instead, she slides down her front door to sit on the floor. The blonde-haired girl sobs harder than she has in a while. Her body shakes, her nose is runny, and her head hurts. She sits there for a minute and while she is still crying, she is calm enough to get off the floor. Paige makes her way into the bathroom with tears down her face to get into the shower. She cries as she takes off her makeup and gets into the shower. She cries as she gets dressed in her pajamas. She cries as she sits on the couch, curled up in a blanket.
Paige is angry. She’s angry at herself for loving Azzi. She’s angry at Azzi for doing this to them.
She’s also tired.
Paige is tired of being angry. Paige is done.
-
The sight of Paige after she opens the door breaks Azzi’s heart. Her blue eyes are swollen and tear filled and her nose is red and runny. It strikes something deep within her to see the older girl so upset. Azzi isn’t even sure how to fix the mess she’s made.
“Can I come in?” Azzi asked softly. She watches as Paige wordlessly steps to the side to welcome her into her space. Paige shuts the door before moving into the kitchen to get a glass of water. The blonde-haired girl then grabs some Advil to ease her headache. She takes her medicine while Azzi starts the conversation.
“I’m sorry” Azzi whispers.
“For what?” Paige asks as she sits her glass on the counter. The younger girl immediately crosses the kitchen to invade the older’s space. She reaches for the blonde to pull her into a hug when Paige flinches away from her touch. Azzi’s eyes fill with tears as a result. Paige doesn’t want Azzi to touch her.
“Paige, please!” Azzi cries.
“What are you apologizing for, Az?” Paige asks. She’s not crying anymore but her voice is thick with emotion and her body drags.
“For what I said at Ted’s” The younger girl starts. “I got jealous seeing you with that guy and I got-.” she tries to explain before she gets interrupted. “You don’t get to be jealous.” Paige sneers. “Not when you have a girlfriend, not when you left me in the morning to see her, and certainly not after you left my apartment when I asked if you had feelings for me!” The blonde-haired girl spat.
“I know I messed up but I’m sorry, Paige.” Azzi pleads. Tears flow freely down her cheeks as she thinks of what she can say to fix this.
“You’re sorry for Ted’s?” The older girl questioned. Azzi shook her head in agreement.
“Fine. I forgive you. Now, leave.” Paige demanded.
“N-No” Azzi stutters out. “We need to talk about this!”
“Talk about what, Azzi?” Paige exclaimed. “Should we talk about how you don’t want me but clearly don't want anyone else to have me? or Should we talk about Riley? Or we can talk about-”
“Fuck, Paige! I said I’m fucking sorry!” Azzi exclaims while flailing her hands. In her movement, she knocks the glass off of the counter.
The glass shatters. Its contents, water and ice, leave a mess on the floor. Paige immediately drops to start picking up the broken glass. All of the energy she once had, gone. Azzi doesn’t miss a beat in helping her.
“I'm sorry.” Azzi speaks softly. Paige can only sigh as a response. She feels like she’s been here before too many times.
“Stop apologizing.” Paige grunts out. “If I apologize to this glass, it’ll still be broken. It won’t fix anything. You apologizing won’t fix anything. I’ll still love you in the end. My heart will still break in the end. So, just stop.” Her defeated tone shatters Azzi from the inside out.
“Paige-” Azzi starts before Paige cuts her off. “Just go.” the blonde says.
This time, Azzi listens.
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