#discussions of marks

[ollieofthebeholder]

to find promise of peace (and the solace of rest): a TMA fanfic

<< Beginning < Prev. || AO3

Chapter 25: July 2016

Sasha was not an older sister. Or a younger sister. At least, not as far as she knew. She had in fact grown up as yet another unwanted child lost in the foster care system, shunted from home to home without time to put down roots or even really form proper friendships, which meant that by the time she’d got to uni and a more settled life she’d lost the knack. She cared about Tim and Jon and Martin, of course she did, but up until a couple of days ago, she would have laughed at the very idea that she cared about any of them more than she cared about herself.

So she hadn’t been prepared for the surge of emotions she felt every time Martin opened his mouth. What she’d thought would be a simple, academic, satisfy-my-curiosity-and-get-some-goddamned-answers conversation had rapidly turned into a series of revelations that smacked her upside the head and left her breathless and nauseous.

She’d told Jon when she made her statement that she didn’t consider Martin to have the best self-preservation instincts in the world. Obviously she’d been wrong. He’d been embroiled in this…bullshit…since he was a small child, going on twenty years now, and he’d survived. Not only survived but thrived, and he’d apparently been quietly protecting all of them this entire time. But he shouldn’t have had to, and she was taken aback by the intensity of that conviction.

Maybe it was just that she’d only really had Tim as an example of a protective instinct, or thought she had. Now, though, she could see that it came in all sorts of styles. Tim’s protectiveness was a warm blanket and a hug, but Martin’s was a quietly-built fortress wall you never thought about being there or even really noticed until someone knocked one of the stones out on top of you, and Melanie’s was a barricade of cannons and barbed wire and flame. Sasha wasn’t entirely sure what hers was like, mostly because she hadn’t realized she had it before today, but she suspected it was somewhat akin to the way Gerry—Gerard—she wasn’t sure where she fell on the spectrum of being allowed to call him Gerry—was protective of Melanie and Martin.

Whatever it was, the look on Jon’s face when Gerard made his announcement brought it out full force.

“Elaborate,” she said, a bit more sharply than she meant to, because Jon looked absolutely terrified and she didn’t know if it was at the idea of the rituals themselves or the idea of an Avatar being a key component. “What rituals? What do they do?”

“It’s…different for each one. Probably. Look, it’s not like there’s a manual for this or anything.” Gerard sighed heavily. “Gertrude was trying to stop them. She’d dedicated most of her career as Archivist to it, or so she told me once. She could’ve been lying, I dunno. But we were…the one we were specifically trying to stop was the Unknowing.”

“Which sounds like a Stranger ritual,” Tim said slowly. Gerard nodded. “Did you manage it?”

“Dunno. Hadn’t by the time I died. I kind of assume she did, or we wouldn’t be here talking, but…well, I dunno,” Gerard repeated. “Maybe it’s not ready yet. Takes centuries to build up the power, and if it fails, it’s back to square one. Could be the Stranger is still building up.”

Sasha picked up her notebook and flipped back to her list, tallying up quickly. “I think you’re right. Look, out of all the statements we’ve done, the real ones I mean—well, take away Father Burroughs’ statement and the one where you found the book at the nexus of all the fears, and the two we’ve had the most about have been the Stranger and the Flesh, tied with five each. And the anatomy class one was a live statement—that can’t be a coincidence, right? You said they were trying to learn to—to imitate humanity better. Is that part of this…Unknowing thing?”

Gerard sighed. “Maybe the build-up to it. I-I mean, if they’re recruiting people, luring them in, they want to be as…convincing as possible. Could also just be they were tormenting the professor. The actual Unknowing, though, doesn’t really matter how human they look, I reckon.”

Melanie squinted up at Martin’s face, her nose scrunched in worry, then turned to Gerard. “Okay, cards on the table. What is the Unknowing? Specifically.”

“I don’t have a play-by-play, if that’s what you’re asking. Not even sure Gertrude did. I just know the basics.” Gerard took a deep breath. “It’s a dance of some kind. Not—like a ballet, I guess, you know? And it centers around, well, the Dancer. Which, I think, is something mechanical, something made. Like a robot or a doll, maybe. Gertrude said something about a ‘mechanical Turk’ once, but—”

A chill ran up Sasha’s spine as she remembered one of the conversations she’d once had with Gertrude. “That was destroyed.”

All the heads in the room turned to look at her in varying degrees of shock and concern, except for Martin’s, which was perfectly blank and honestly scared her more than the others. It was Jon who spoke. “Sasha, you’ve heard of this?”

“Did a paper on it back in university. Wolfgang von Kempelen’s Mechanical Turk was—well, it was widely believed to have been a hoax, and I guess in the early days it was. It was supposed to be a chess-playing automaton that beat some of the best minds in Europe in its day, but years later it came out that there was a space under the table and a person hidden under it who actually controlled the Turk and played the game. Still a marvel of engineering, but not self-powered.” Sasha hesitated. “Supposedly it got sold to another man after Kempelen’s death and kept touring until 1854 when it was destroyed by fire, but I think that was a replica of the original. Gertrude let me read something once that she said she thought I’d find interesting—a journal entry from the first man who’d played the Turk, detailing an…incident in 1787. I didn’t believe it at the time, figured it was just the usual…sorry, Jon, but the usual spooky bullshit we have to sift through. After all, I had the papers to prove the Mechanical Turk was still touring for another sixty years, why would I believe some crackpot who saw it come to life only to get blown away by blind soldiers with a cannon?”

Gerard nodded slowly. “That explains a lot. Gertrude thought the only way to stop it, to really stop it, would be once it was underway. Anything you do to it ahead of time can be fixed, but if you disrupt it at the high point of the whole thing it should put it out of commission for centuries.”

“When was the last time the Eye tried a ritual?” Martin’s voice was extremely quiet, but in a way that sent another chill down Sasha’s spine.

Gerard swallowed hard. He looked like he was about to be sick, but he met Martin’s eyes without flinching. “Dunno. But Gertrude reckoned it was coming up.” He held out a hand to Melanie. “I swear I didn’t know last time I was home. I’d have told you then and there if I had. She’d told me about the Unknowing but not the Watcher’s Crown, not until we were in America, and I didn’t want to bring it up on a call or in a letter.”

“That should have come up last night, don’t you think?” Melanie sounded both angry and scared. “Like as soon as you had the opportunity? Don’t you think that’s something we needed to know? Jesus fuck, is that why you didn’t get in touch with us like you promised?”

“I—yes.” Gerard’s shoulders slumped, and he broke eye contact and looked away, picking at a frayed spot on his jeans. “I’m not going to pretend it isn’t. I—I got scared. She didn’t tell me much about it, just kind of mentioned it offhand and said she’d already made plans to avoid having to play a part in it, but…you know, I didn’t know if she’d—I didn’t know what she’d do if—I didn’t want her to meet you. Not until I told you.”

“Told us what?” Melanie demanded. “Because you didn’t. Is it somehow less dangerous now that she’s dead?”

“Yes,” Sasha said, understanding sinking into her heart and dropping it into the pit of her stomach with the weight of certainty. She looked up at Gerard, who had turned to her in obvious surprise. “I’m right, aren’t I? You weren’t worried about her trying to recruit them or whatever. It was that she would have recognized Martin as someone who’d been touched enough by the Eye to maybe be viable to a ritual, and she’d have killed him.”

Tim’s head shot up; Jon sucked in a sharp breath and turned ashen. Gerard nodded slowly. “That was my worry. She was…look, there were rumors, all right? Not by name, but there were a lot of whispers about the Archivist. I just thought it was part of the job description until I met her, but no, she was just a stone-cold bitch. Not the sort to hesitate when it came to…using people, or sacrificing them. And okay, maybe there was a bit of worry that she’d do to you two what she did to me—just use you up and discard you the second you weren’t of use anymore—but the bigger fear was that she’d just kill you, straight out.”

Sasha didn’t speak whatever language Melanie used for the next five minutes, but it definitely sounded profane. So did Tim, although she was at least able to identify that as Italian. Jon looked incredibly shaken. “Would—good Lord, do you think she really would have done that?”

Martin shook his head, not in negation, Sasha thought, just some sort of indefinable emotion. He was surprisingly calm when he spoke. “Like Gerry said, there were rumors—we all heard them. Honestly, it’s probably a big part of the reason Jane Prentiss was so interested in attacking the Archives—that she believed, or maybe even the Corruption itself believed, that that was part of the Archivist’s job description. You don’t hear too much about people being too tightly tied up in the Ceaseless Watcher who don’t find their way to the Institute, one way or another, so maybe it didn’t ever occur to me that she might kill me if we ever met, but if she thought there was a risk of it, she might’ve. Or at least she might’ve tried.”

That surprised Sasha, enough that she blurted out, “You don’t think she’d have managed it?”

Martin actually cracked a smile at that. He tilted his head in Melanie’s direction. “She’d have had to be very fast.”

“Damn right,” Melanie snarled. Martin freed an arm from the blanket still wrapped around him and hugged her; she resisted for a minute, then sighed and slumped against him.

Tim studied Martin. “You don’t seem particularly worried about the possibility.”

“Of her trying to kill me?”

“Of being used in a ritual.”

“Oh. I’m not.” Martin shrugged when all of them stared at him in surprise. “I’ve got five different Marks—well, six now. No matter how strong my connection is to the Eye, it’s not enough to wipe the others out, so I don’t reckon I’d be all that useful in a ritual to bring a single fear into this universe. I-I mean, it’s like, like forging a sword or something. If your ore has impurities and other…bits mixed in with it, your steel is going to turn out crummy and fall apart the first time you swing it, no matter how well you crafted it. Even assuming there is someone out there trying to put together a ritual—and I’ve got a pretty good idea who it might be if there is—they’re not going to use someone like me as the linchpin, the whole thing would just fall apart.”

There was a brief silence as all of them contemplated that. Sasha picked at the argument from all sides, but she couldn’t see a flaw in it. “So you’re saying the more Marks we all collect, the safer we are. From being used in a ritual, at least.”

Martin nodded. “I’m definitely not saying ‘let’s go out and stir up hornets’ nests to accumulate as many Marks as we can,’ because there’s always a chance something will kill us eventually, but in this case, what doesn’t kill us might actually make us stronger.”

Gerard took a breath. “I—I never thought of it before, but you’re right.”

“Does that mean you can’t be used in a Terminus ritual?” Sasha asked him. “Because you have—had—other Marks? Or does he?” she added, glancing at Martin.

“He does,” Martin confirmed. “The Eye and the Buried. They’re harder to see than the End’s Mark, but they’re still there.”

“Also,” Gerard said, “I don’t think there is a ritual for the End. After all, Death is inevitable—why would he need to hasten that? He’s probably the most patient of the Fourteen.”

“Still.” Martin took a deep breath. “I can’t say I’m unhappy it wouldn’t work with you if there was one.”

Melanie rested her chin on Martin’s chest and looked up at him. “You realize that means I’m going to ask you again to tell me what I got Marked by, if I got Marked, at Cambridge Military Hospital. I’m assuming I’ve got the Buried too, but…”

“Actually,” Tim said quietly, “I’d like to know, too. As far as I know, I’ve just been Marked by the Eye because I work for the Institute. Not that I think I’m all that important, but just in case, I’d like to have some idea, you know?”

Sasha felt something twist in her stomach. “Me, too. I mean, does meeting Michael technically count as a Mark or not?”

“I—I don’t know.” Martin hesitated, then sighed. “Okay. Okay.”

He leaned forward and set his cup on the table, then stood, the throw slipping off his shoulders as he stretched and straightened. He nodded at the sofa. “Anyone who wants to know, sit over there. I’ll sit on the chair right there and I’ll only look there, so if anyone doesn’t want to me to See, I won’t.”

“Why wouldn’t we?” Tim frowned as he stood and moved towards the sofa.

“I told you last night. It’s not just a matter of ‘oh, I got a bit spooked by a shadow in the window,’ it’s something that hit you hard. And I’m not going to lie to you—if I don’t already know how you got whatever Mark you might have, I’m going to be curious. I won’t ask you about it today—I won’t do that to you, to any of you—but, well, at its core, the Eye is all about knowledge, about exposing secrets.” Martin grimaced. “And you heard what I did earlier. I didn’t even know I could do that. There’s every chance that this…thing…will get bad enough, sooner or later, that it won’t be enough for me to See, I’ll have to Know. The last thing I want is to force something out of you because I know you have it.”

Jon slid over on the couch closer to Melanie, looking up at Martin seriously. “I’d rather you ask me than pounce some random person on the street.”

“Yeah, same.” Tim settled next to him and glanced at Sasha.

She didn’t need any further prompting. It was the work of no more than a second to step around the coffee table and join the others. Gerard stayed in the armchair.

Martin sat down across from them. He closed his eyes, inhaled deeply, and let it out in a slow, even breath. As he did so, he slid his glasses off his face and lowered his hands, his shoulders relaxing and his body seeming to sink slightly.

His eyes opened.

Static filled the room, the same static Sasha had noticed when Martin spoke about Michael and when he’d Looked at Gerard, and for the first time she realized it was the same static she’d heard on the tape when he took off his glasses to Look at Jane Prentiss. It started off soft at first, then built gradually until it drowned out the sound of her own breathing. Behind Martin, the candle she presumed to be warding against the Beholder glowed brighter, not a sudden flare but a steadily building glow. Martin’s eyes had gone eerily blank and still, as though they’d been replaced with pictures or glass models, and yet she could feel his regard passing from one to the other. Prickles danced across her skin in odd patterns—spiraling around her arms, sparking against her shoulder, tickling her throat—quickly passing from disconcerting to unpleasant to painful. She clenched her hands tightly and determined to bear up.

Out of the corner of her eyes, she watched the others. Tim was pressing a hand to his chest, grimacing; Melanie sat ramrod straight, arms folded tightly across her chest and a scowl deepening on her face; Jon’s hands bunched up his borrowed trousers as he kept his eyes fixed on Martin, his expression one between worry and anguish. She could tell he was clenching his teeth and trembling slightly.

The static grew louder and louder, the sensations more and more unbearable. Sasha wanted to ask what was taking so long, to demand Martin tell them what he Saw, but her jaw seemed fused shut. He still sat with that same blank expression, perfectly still and seemingly immobile, and yet the scrutiny got more and more intense. At last, after what seemed simultaneously like mere seconds and an eternity, Jon made a small noise of pain and flinched, his eyes squinching shut.

Instantly, the static stopped. Sasha’s skin settled back to its normal state, still tingling slightly but more in a remembered sensation than active discomfort, and she rubbed her arms without conscious thought to make it stop. Martin gave a great, shuddering gasp, his whole body going rigid for a moment before he doubled over slightly, squeezing his eyes shut tightly and burying his face in his hands, heedless of his glasses still in his left one. He was breathing heavily as if he’d been running.

“Martin! O-oh, God.” Jon was up in an instant, Melanie a half second behind him, and starting towards Martin, but Gerard got to his feet and threw out an arm to stop them.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Martin panted, his voice choked with tears. “I-I didn’t—I’m sorry. I c-couldn’t stop, I couldn’t—”

“It’s o—it’s not your fault,” Sasha said. It wasn’t okay, not by a long chalk, but Martin hadn’t done it on purpose.

Martin fumbled and managed to shove his glasses back onto his face, then straightened up, looking miserable. The bandages on his face were discolored with bright red, and at first Sasha thought he’d reopened the wounds beneath them, but then she realized the fresh stains were on the wrong side and way too thin to be from a wormhole.

“Are you—were you crying blood?” she asked, getting to her feet as well.

“Okay, no more of that,” Tim said firmly, getting up and stepping over the coffee table like it wasn’t even there. Jon and Melanie ducked under Gerard’s arm, and Sasha rushed around the other end of the coffee table to drop to her knees and join the others in hugging Martin tightly. “That’s—that was way too much for you. You’re hurt, you don’t need to do that again.”

“Yeah,” Martin mumbled from somewhere in the center of the pile of humanity that was his friends. “I’m—I’m sorry. I should have known something like that would happen.”

“How?” Sasha demanded. “Has that ever happened before?”

“N-no, but—”

“But nothing,” Jon said firmly. “We never should have made you look at all of us at once, Martin. Tim’s right, that was far too much.” He hesitated, then swiped at one of the trickles of blood on Martin’s skin. “Are you better now?”

“A bit,” Martin said, not entirely convincingly. Sasha took the hint and eased back a little. “Christ, that—yeah, I’ve never had it that bad before.”

Tim sat on the coffee table, his hands still hovering around Martin’s knees. “Did you at least get the answers you wanted? You know, so we don’t have to do that again?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I did.” Martin took a deep, steadying breath and straightened. Melanie rocked back to kneel at his feet, resting her folded arms on his leg; Jon simply stood next to the armchair, hovering anxiously. Gerard, whom Sasha just realized hadn’t been part of the hug, came a little closer. “Okay. So, um, all of you have the Eye on you, obviously. That’s, that was a given. Tim, you’ve got the—you’ve got one Mark beyond that. Jon, Sash, you’ve, um, you’ve each got two more—n-not the same ones. You’ve actually got four, Neens.”

Melanie swore again. “The Eye, the Buried…the Stranger, I guess?” Martin nodded. “What’s the other one? This is me asking and wanting them to know. It relates to a statement, after all.”

Martin swallowed. “The Slaughter.”

“Fuck,” Melanie said softly.

Sasha hesitated. She didn’t want to hurt Martin—or Tim or Jon, for that matter—any more than they already had been, but it occurred to her that if she asked, if she made it her choice, it might be better for Martin than if he knew he risked exposing them.

“What about me?” she asked. “What were my other two?”

“The Spiral and the Web,” Martin answered. “Bit of a surprise there. I’d have thought the Corruption, but I guess meeting Timothy Hodges wasn’t enough to Mark you. They’re both faint—fainter than the Eye, anyway—but they’re definitely there.”

“And mine?” Tim asked softly. Sasha looked at him. Something in his eyes told her he already knew, or at least that he’d guessed.

“The Stranger.” The pain in Martin’s eyes was palpable, and he pressed his lips together tightly; Sasha guessed there was something he was trying his hardest not to say.

Thankfully, Jon seemed to figure that out, too. He touched Martin’s shoulder gently. “You said I had three as well. I know one is the Eye and the other is the Corruption…obviously. What’s the third?”

“The Web, and it’s almost as strong a Mark on you as the Eye is.” Martin looked up at Jon, guilt all over his face. “I—I kind of knew that already. I—when you asked me to look into Carlos Vittery, I—you just, you looked scared and I just—I didn’t, I know I shouldn’t have, but—”

“It’s all right.” Jon swallowed hard, although he looked stricken. “I-I probably would have done something stupid like go to investigate it myself if you hadn’t, so it’s for the best, really.”

“I think this is all enough for one day,” Gerard said firmly. “You both need rest before you get into this any further.”

Sasha nodded, pushing herself properly to her feet. “We can talk about it tomorrow. Or in a couple of days.”

“Or when we’re back to work,” Jon said. “It’s—it’s going to be a few days, but—”

“It’s going to be more than that,” Tim said sternly. “You two aren’t in any shape to be back at the Institute just yet. I’m sure you’ll need to see a doctor and get a note before you can go back, and honestly, there’s going to be a lot of healing you both need to do first. But I agree with Jon. We can—this isn’t time-sensitive, right? We can wait to talk about it until then.”

Martin took another deep breath and closed his eyes, then nodded slowly. “Okay,” he said softly. “Okay.”

Sasha looked at Jon. He nodded, too, but she could see the look on his face and inwardly resigned herself. They were definitely going to have a fight on their hands.

[crimeronan]

bonus. tell me why

[helenofsparta2]

R.I.P. the version of Percy Jackson, who spoke competently in front of the senate, fairly easily ridiculed Octavian, and managed to sway the romans to his side simply by providing good arguments and being a natural born leader in Son of Neptune, you will always be famous to me

[allonsybadwolf]

So I'm slightly obsessed with Severance (2022) and I may have spent like a week straight cutting together an Innie Cut and an Outie cut and holy shit guys it's such an experience. I watched them both straight through like long movies and

(edit: guys it's available now!! Check the notes/reblogs of this post, or check my blog, for how to access it!!)

The Outie Cut is like an obscure offbeat indie dark comedy where none of your questions get answered and there's zero resolution at the end.

You really get to focus on oMark's perspective, which is interesting because in the show it feels like iMark is the main focus. We get to focus on how oMark's depression has impacted his life, and his journey through the confusion of what's happening with Lumon and Severance. The story feels slower and more grounded. It works better than I anticipated.

The Innie Cut is like a slow and unexpected descent into madness. Honestly, I thought the Outie Cut would be spookier, but no. The Innie Cut is very unsettling.

At first, it kind of just feels like a regular kind of office life show, where it's not at all unusual that we never see the characters at home. We only see them in the office because the show is about the office.

But then there are. Things. Very strange unsettling things. Just out of nowhere. With no context from the outside world. No relief from the blinding bright white landscape of Lumon Industries. The hallways that never stop, the walls closing in on you, the fact that you can't ever leave.

And oh my god when they wake up in the outside world in the final episode it is. SO. JARRING. It's been like three plus hours of bright white office at this point. And then suddenly, disconcertingly, you're thrown into this world that is dark and warm but unfamiliar and treacherous and you have to navigate it perfectly and fast or suffer the consequences.

And iMark, at the party. When you watch Severance for the first time, the party scene is a meeting of two worlds that are familiar to you, the viewer. When you watch the Innie Cut, you're just as off balance as iMark. You don't know these people. You don't know who you can trust. You don't know the right thing or the wrong thing to do here.

Anyways I'd love to share these cuts with people but I have no idea how to go about doing that

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel(ft. Mark Webber & Jenson Button)

[rinbylin]

相思梨花阵，有所耳闻。解法？ the formation of pear blossom of longing. i've heard of it. what is the way out of it? 笛家训死士，素来收钱办事。今日，我便买你这条贱命。 the di manor grooms expendable killers for money, and today, i shall buy this wretched life of yours. （... 笛盟主，若不曾投石问路，你便能安然地度过。 di mengzhu, had you not tried to find out what's ahead, you would have made it through safely.） （... 自今日起，再无笛家胁迫。天高海远，任尔等自在纵横。 from here on, the di manor is a threat no more. the world is wide and vast for you to freely roam.）

di feisheng + the copper coin | 莲花楼 mysterious lotus casebook ep. 18 / 34

[sociallyrepressed]

this is specific to my interests

[formulinos]

sam raimi's rules of horror: don't make a boring picture!

1. the innocent must suffer 2021 abu dhabi grand prix | 2008 brazilian grand prix | 1999 italian grand prix | 2019 canadian grand prix 2. the guilty must be punished renault and their crashgate | michael schumacher's 1997 disqualification of the championship | mclaren and their spygate 3. you must taste blood to become a man 2010 turkish grand prix | 1990 japanese grand prix | 2016 spanish grand prix | 1998 belgian grand prix

[grewlikefancyflowers]

vastly underutilised aspect of mdzs is that lwj, at the time wwx attended the cr lectures, had already progressed past any need for lqr's lessons

the whole reason wangxian end up attending classes together is because lqr wanted lwj there to set an example to wwx

it's also because of lqr that wangxian spend so much time in the library together.

in the end lqr regrets this choice (and lwj stops attending the lectures)

obviously wangxian would have happened regardless because, well, wangxian. but i like to imagine that the possibility that his decisions led to all that keeps lqr up at night.

[milk-ducts]

[Brief] Thoughts on Film Theory's Analysis

I was gonna post this on my priv twt.. but moots convinced me to post it here so here we are.. beware of spoilers, gore, bla bla bla ..

FIRST OFF I'm gonna start by saying, I AM ESL. I may or may not have misinterpreted some of his words, but this is mainly how I thought of his analysis. This is not meant to be ill-guided or rude ! so sorry if it comes off as this way. I will be very repetitive.

Another thing, most if not all of the information matpat gave out i alr discussed with a few mutuals on discord about a few months back so this is not new territory to me 😭😭 I thought most folks would already knew the concept of how the brain deteriorates overtime But honestly, that indisposition shouldn’t even apply to omni man??? matpat tried to compare an immortal Viltrumite's psychology to that of an aging human's, which can be misguided.

Let's start by how he compares Nolan's brain to the average aging human's brain so the audience could understand his psyche more and how empathy declines overtime. First and foremost, Nolan is not a human, second; Nolan wasn't raised with empathy or around an empathetic environment - it was an alien concept to his race. Something frowned upon. He was raised from birth to conquer and destroy without remorse. His brain never developed those neural pathways for empathy in the first place. It's not that they deteriorated over time, they were never even formed.

By the time he came to Earth, all this familial stuff was new to him. Sure, he knew he was gonna outlive them, but He didn't think he'd get attached. HE didn't process that he'd grieve over them when the time came.

Interacting with humanity for the first time ignited unfamiliar emotions in Nolan that he didn’t know how to process.

His time living amongst humans caused conflicting feelings he’d never experienced in his centuries of systematic slaughter. Loving Debbie and Mark went against everything he was taught, but he couldn't help it. For once, the lives he was manipulating to further Viltrum’s goals meant something to him. He developed a [what he presumed, NOT what he felt about them in reality, his love for them is far more profound than he assumed it to be which we later on see in the last ep of s1 and the second season] petty facsimile of love for his ersatz family.

So no, his capacity for empathy didn't decline with age as MatPat claims. His empathy was stunted from the start. An underdeveloped skill, not a deteriorated one. We had characters like Debbie to help him understand those notions, help him grow it. With Mark in the mix? it only amplified that development.

Viltrumites are societally and culturally predisposed to violence and domination. Nolan was never accustomed to forming emotional connections or grieving loss. Those were entirely new experiences for him after arriving on Earth. He was not jaded. he was grown into jamais vu in viltrum.

This is why the whole conflict in s1 happened, he was treading between double lives he wasn't sure of. He was conflicted because his past values were refuting with his new experiences. He found love on Earth, he found himself unable to accept how he'd lose Debbie. Of How jaded Mark might become. Everything he said to Mark till that point was his own self-projections, his own fears, doubts.

While the video did provide some interesting facts about neuroscience and aging, the application of those facts to Nolan's character was inaccurate. IT is educational for those who don't know, but it isn't recent news that the brain begins to deteriorate overtime so this video wasn't that informative which kinda disappointed me. Their analysis lacked alot of information about the Viltrumite race and Nolan's character. Comparing him to humans with normal life experiences just doesn't work. His immortal nature combined with a lack of empathy from birth created a psychology unlike anything seen on Earth.

SORRY FOR RANTING ALOT AND OR IF IT SEEMS LIKE I'M GIVING MATPAT SHIT ... i really liked their analysis on immortal so i'll give them that. Immortal, unlike Nolan, was born human. He has lived among humanity for over 3000 years, inhabiting different identities of public and devoted historians. Because of this, his psyche developed quite differently. Immortal knows how to form connections, experience loss, and adapt to social changes. His perpetual existence didn't harden his heart like Viltrum's brutal culture did to Nolan. Instead, Immortal's immortality allowed his empathy and compassion to blossom.

Humans are social creatures. Our brains have evolved to seek out interpersonal relationships, crave affection, and find meaning in community. For an immortal like Immortal, social interaction is vital to staving off boredom, depression and detachment from humanity.

By inhabiting mortal lives, he stays tethered to the human experience. He continues learning, growing, and developing empathy.

This is why he's devastated when the guardians die.

This is also why he goes fucking mental and tries to kill Omni-man.

If Immortal had lived in isolation all this time, unable to connect with people, his psyche would likely resemble Nolan's more closely. Without social interaction, Immortal's brain would atrophy in ways that preclude complex emotions and moral reasoning. His sense of purpose would fade, achievements would lose meaning, and life itself might feel pointless. By engaging with humanity, Immortal gives his endless existence purpose and direction. He finds value in each temporary life, so loss still impacts him deeply. Socializing keeps his emotions and cognition flexible, which prevents the apathy and hardness of heart seen in Nolan. Nolan never had these opportunities in his early years, this is why it's more difficult for him to stray away from his indoctrination. It's that he's unused to it, underdeveloped.

60 years to Nolan would've been a year and a half, so what's 20 measly years on Earth for him? Yes, he found profound connections in that little speck of time, but Immortal's emotional capacity is far more extensive.

In summary, Comparing Nolan to a human, whether mortal or immortal, is kinda inaccurate. His Viltrumite psyche rules out him from possessing JADED human qualities. You could say he's desensitized to violence sure, but no.. unfortunately.. he does not have [boomer] brain. He has [indoctrinated alien-fascist brain]

Leave your own thoughts down below or through reblogs, I'm really interested on what others may think of this! (URGHHHNN... my hcs r slipping away from my fingers cuz now people r gonna accept what matpat says as truth.. someone gun me down from the hills..)

[aliettali]

Thanks Dino Dave. I'm going to draw kimharry yaoi now

[laracrofted]

everyone shut up, i have a vision x

[ittybittyremy]

I really hate the use of the word "hypocrite" in the CR fandom because it doesn't let people appreciate the nuances of the characters/situations. This is not to say that the characters don't have their hypocritical moments. I just think there are people who slap the word on a character and call it a day, not even bothering to try to understand it.

I have more to say but TLDR: Hypocrisy is a fact but it feels like an insult because it implies that there is no reason that the contrast of ideas exists.

You won't like to hear this but everybody (including you) is/will be a hypocrite at some point. There are many cases of this, some more severe than others.

As a small example, I hate the sound of other people clicking their pens repeatedly but I click my pen repeatedly all the time. Is that hypocritical? Yes! You could slap that label call it that and call it a day and it wouldn't be technically wrong. However, you could also figure out why these contrasts exist. In my case, my thing with noises has to do with control. I don't mind my pen clicking because I can choose the tempo and decide when to stop it. But others make that exact same noise, I can't control it and I don't know when it'll stop.

Hypocrisy is a fact but it feels like an insult because it implies that there is no reason that the contrast of ideas exists.

This is not meant to say that all hypocrisy makes sense or has reason. Reasonless hypocrisy is one of the foundations of prejudice/discrimination but that's a whole other conversation.

There will also be reasons of hypocrisies existing that you disagree with. However, just because you disagree with the reason doesn't mean that the reason does not exist.

Back to Critical Role

I made this post because of people's reactions to Ashton regarding their views on the gods versus the primordials. During the CR Cooldown, the cast calls Asthon out for their hypocrisy of their views on the gods versus the titans. This is what Taliesin says about it:

"It's the difference between the feeling of being small in front of someone rather than being small in front of everything. Is really what happened, which is instead of having the smallness and raging at the big person, it was 'I'm in the middle of this.' [Asthon] didn't feel separated from it... It was more feeling the place in the cosmos, rather than actual people going 'oh it's you' and you're like 'fuck'."

Of course, you can understand Ashton’s hypocrisy and disagree with the reasoning. That's fine, as long as you see their reasons and acknowledge that they exist. It may not make sense to you but it makes sense to the character.

[cyanide-sippy-cup]

Okay now that Anissa is in the show, I have to talk about THAT storyline. There's not much particularly new I can say that hasn't already been discussed but I need to gather my thoughts on what the show has to do to be successful in this regard. With that being said,

Spoilers for things the show has not covered yet

And massive Trigger Warning for discussions of sexual assault and post-assault trauma.

So first things out of the way, I do not believe they should cut it. The changes the show has made are ultimately pretty minor. A character change, order of events swapped. With them sticking as close as they are to the comic, I think it would be a massive problem to skip over it from a story telling standpoint.

From a real world standpoint, it's even more important. Male sexual assault is something that rarely gets depicted properly. It's usually a joke or a moment of triumph and that very much has had an effect on the way we look at it in the real world. And since Invincible is now a show pretty much everybody has their eyes on, choosing not to talk about it would be missing an opportunity to have a very real, very important conversation that very well could educate men on how to navigate and survive what they are going through.

I'm also worried that they'll be too afraid to actually say the word "rape". Lots of modern adaptations delete important discussions like Sokka's sexism or the gender discussions from Cowboy Bebop in order to avoid properly handling them and usually replace them with something worse in a sort of "all bark and no bite" liberalism. Directly saying it as it is is incredibly important to showing that talking about it is not only NOT shameful, but also necessary in getting the help you need and the healing that is necessary to survive.

And from a storytelling standpoint, saying it is important too. The moment where Mark tells Eve what happened is not only great in showing that telling someone is important but is also the moment where Mark is forced to admit the truth to himself. "She raped me." Those three words are a massive turning point for the whole story. Character dynamics change, this becomes a focus for most of Mark's loved ones, and it fundamentally changes his life.

Markus. This is a piece of the puzzle I don't see many talk about. While the rest is a showcase of what to do, Markus as a character is a showcase of what not to. It is so, so rare that a child conceived of a rape is properly depicted, nevermind discussed. From Mark's POV, he holds no ill will towards his son. He simply wants him to live a life on Earth with his family like he did and just can't be with him because he is needed in space. But to Markus, his dad hates him. He thinks his father keeps him on Earth so that he doesn't have to think about him. And this idea of his father's disgust contorts his image of himself. He begins to feel self-hatred, hatred towards his mother for making him this way, and hatred towards his father for abandoning him and leaving him to despise what he sees in the mirror. "You made Terra with love. I was made with hate."

Whether Mark meant it or not, his neglect of Markus ruined his early life. No matter how many friends he made, what groups he joined, they could never fill that hole. He idolized his father. I mean, how could he not? His father was, IS a great hero. A man who was out at that very moment leading the movement for universal peace. But because Mark barely visited him, he only had an idea of what his father was like. A man who sacrificed so much to help the world, who fought in space and yet still managed to save the Earth dozens of times. A man who had the time to help everyone and yet couldn't make time for him.

(Important edit: in no way do I mean to say Mark is obligated to be a part of his son's life, I meant that Mark chooses to be there but ultimately fails to do so and that causes issues)

And don't get me wrong, this story has some pretty glaring flaws. For example I think they tried a little too hard to teach Mark that the person who hurt him is human too and has positively affected the lives of many. Like absolutely there is a conversation to be had there but because they had to move on with the plot they kinda just went "HEY MARK DON'T BE SAD SHE'S COOL NOW AND ALSO SHE'S DEAD SO THERE'S NO POINT IN LINGERING OKAY BYYEEEEE". But I think instead of these flaws scaring the show away they should invite the show forward. It's an opportunity to improve on the story and discussions rather than shy away from it.

Oh and also harking back to my previous point in paragraph 2, there's another aspect that makes it stand out in an important discussion. If I'm remembering correctly, the comic makes it pretty clear that Mark could have overpowered Anissa but didn't for a couple of reasons, namely not wanting to hurt her. And that is SO important and SO rare. A discussion surrounding an assault victim who could have fought back but didn't where the victim is NOT portrayed as in the wrong and in fact just as worthy to be traumatized as any other victim is SO DAMN IMPORTANT and could legit change a lot in the way we look at these topics.

So yeah, I think the series should adapt it. Also I think it would be great if they brought on actual victims and experts and whatnot so their depiction could be just that much more focused around what needs to be said. Sorry if all this read as klunky, I have a lot of thoughts bouncing around up here that I kinda just spewed onto the page with no particular order. I'm also obviously not the most educated on the topic. My personal experiences with this were relatively minor and not something I've ever felt comfortable addressing. And yeah I know it's important no matter how "small" or "minor" it seems and I'm not trying to downplay any of that but I just don't really have the words to phrase that differently. Which is exactly why I think we NEED education and discussions about this stuff so that we DO know the words to navigate the topic.

[skitskatdacat63]

2010 Bahrain Grand Prix - Fernando Alonso

[peppermintys]

my friends and i r in the process of a regretevator fantasy au, here’s our character concept ideas so far!!

warning we haven’t found a place for everyone yet!!! so if you notice that people are missing, that’s why!! this is still a giant wip

under the cut :)

KINGDOM OF HELL (despite the name, it’s actually the most peaceful kingdom, we just wanted to keep the hell theme with mozzy :DD)

ruler - mozelle

people who live there

- split (royal jester)

- lampert (royal advisor)

- mark (he builds shit, like in canon HAHSABSB)

- wallter (don’t have a job for him yet)

- brock (part of the royal guard, runs a tavern as a side hustle)

KINGDOM OF (that’s what it’s called. it has no name. people usually just refer to it as mach’s kingdom)

ruler - mach

people who live here

- dr retro (cleric)

- pilby (royal jester)

KINGDOM OF SOULS (the one with the coolest name, but also the most depressing kingdom)

ruler - mr

people who live there

- folly (poses as the royal advisor, actually the royal assassin)

- bive (royal…. something)

- infected / kasper (captain of the royal guard, used to live in the kingdom of hell but failed his mission to kill “the unpleasant dragon” and got captured by him… now he’s trapped here)

- unpleasant (shapeshifting dragon guy, mr doesn’t really seem to mind having a dragon living in his kingdom)

- poob (bard guy)

OUTSIDERS

- pest (traveling thief / bandit… gets in a lot of mischief….)

- sebastian (idk what he’s doin yet)