#disappointing. @ everyone involved including yes the person who was MOST involved

[jimmyspades]

The Blacklist is the funniest possible show the insane conspiracy theory-ridden alt-right could’ve latched onto but it’s also not very funny is it. Yet still fascinating how a particular group can obsess over something without understanding it at all

[aitadjcrazytimes]

It's been a good run

But it's time to bring this to a close!

The saga is over, C, T and I are all together. T and I are in the swing of it, C approves as much as it is possible for him to approve of anything, everyone knows about the blog and is chill.

C is back at his rightful place of walking his sister down the aisle.

I'm getting everything I want, and we're all free to make each other miserable until the day we die.

I'm not going to be updating this blog anymore! Nobody else involved with the situation will be submitting any more AITA posts either, because they are either not on tumblr or agreed it would be annoying.

I will say that there is some stuff on here that I've alluded to that isn't necessarily 100% in the spirit of things, so I've included some stuff below the cut for the folks who have caught onto that. I would not suggest reading it if you like how all of this played out and want to keep it that way. I know that's incredibly vague, but I'm not sure how to phrase it without making it weird?

Thank you all for listening and talking to me over the past few days! That's where I'm leaving it!

...

...

...

...Is everyone who wants to keep believing in the disaster polycule gone? Yes? OK!

So, this was fake. I made up the whole thing. TK and C and T and everyone else are fictional characters. Did I lie? Yes. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

Q: All of it? Even the og AITA post? The followup AITA post? The screenshots?

A: All of it.

Q: Wh... Why did you do this...?

A: Well, first this all started as a Red vs Blue fanfic for the ship Chexer (Church/Tex/Tucker)-

It started as a fanfic for Chexer. However, I was already working on a different fanfic for RVB that was totalling about 15k words at this point (+ at least 90k to go), and I knew I would never have the time or energy to write this one. I thought: yknow. this would be really funny as an aita post.

Q: It was a fanfic of a Halo fanfic series.

A: Yep!

So, I submitted Tucker's perspective. I did not expect for it to get more than maybe 100 notes at most. I totally thought someone would call it out right away.

The funny part is, if I'd dedicated all this energy to a fic instead of this blog, I'd probably have about 15-20 thousand words of fic already, but whatever, can't ruin my personal day!

Also, I wanted to see how many people would figure it out/how long it would take for it to become too obvious that this was a fandom thing. I was dropping names and RvB lore since the beginning. A few people did figure it out, and I DMed them in private to let them know.

Q: But why make the blog then?

A: Because I love to lie and be a nuisance to the general populace! <3

It was always my intent to wait until Carolina's perspective got posted (i am honestly still shocked i got away with "Carey/Georgia/West Virginia/Alabama/Miss Louisiana 1988"), let it simmer for about a day, then come clean. Which is what I'm doing now!

The reason I'm coming clean now instead of dragging it out is because I don't want anyone to feel stupid or like they got duped. You're not stupid! You were a part of this story! This was, as one anon said, a creative writing project. It was a collaboration! Thank you so much for helping me!

That said, I'm sorry to anyone that finds this disappointing! I had a blast doing this, but I will not be doing it again. I have gotten my fill. I have had my taste of being an influencer, and now I can go on with my life without ever feeling like I need to start a youtube channel.

Q: How did you keep up with a consistent timeline?

A: I didn't, especially at first. But in my time as a liar who lies about things, I have found that usually people are willing to believe you when you say "yeah, i lied about that".

Q: Wait, what about the thing with your kid?

A: Yeah, I fucked up on this one. In the other fic I was/am writing, Tucker was around 33. So, when I was saying what Junior's age was, I subtracted it from 33 and got 18. It wasn't until I was showing my partner the blog and they said "Wait, he had his kid at 13??????" that I realized I had fucked up. Oops!

Q: Was it really ALL fake?

A: For the most part. I will say that I did actually drop chocolate cake all over my tits that one time and had to shower by myself like a fucking loser. That one was true. I did also get my nails done for the first time ever, which did actually affect my typing. And I am in a band (but so is Tucker, canonically)! There are a few other things as well, but I don't want to list all of them.

Q: DID you ever read homestuck?

A: Nope. And I never will.

Even the title, though I will say that the title I came up with was "Leonard "Alpha Bitch" Church's Decidedly Not Lo-Fi Beats to Get Nasty and Get Clean To: The Movie"

Q: So there was never a combination sex/bathtime playlist?

A: Maybe! But perhaps more accurately: the combination sex/bathtime playlist was inside of you all along. You can make it. There are only three songs on there that are canon to the lore of this blog. Those are No Children by The Mountain Goats, Take It Out On Me by Thousand Foot Krutch, and one unknown song from the album Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV by Coheed and Cambria (Yep, the call was coming from inside the house, I gave Church my music taste). I had intended this to be Wake Up, but it's out of my hands now. The rest is yours to fill in.

Q: What's your main blog, so I can follow you?

A: Hi, this is aitadjcrazytimes. You're not getting that.

Q: Your AO3 handle?

A: Nope, not that either.

You will never find me. And that's the way I want it. You will see me in every blog. Every new follower. Every stranger you meet on the street. You will look into your discord kitten's eyes, and you will absently wonder if he was the one behind aitadjcrazytimes. And you will never know for certain.

Q: But-

A: Let me live on in your memory. The only person who knows both who I am and the fact that I did this is my partner, who is not into RvB or commonly on tumblr. I am not a RvB blog. I am not a writing blog. I am a nobody on the fringes of tumblr society who's been here long enough to know how to remain in the shadows.

And, even if you do manage to find me, against all odds:

No one will ever believe you.

I am closing my askbox. I am also closing my messages. If you have anything to say to Tucker or Me (tumblr user aitadjcrazytimes), you are welcome to do so in the replies or reblogs, but you will not be receiving an answer. I'll keep this blog up for anyone that wants to go through after the fact and do a deep dive or what have you.

Thanks to everyone who made this into the wild ride it was! Live long and get fucked or whatever! Xoxo <3

[izzysillyhandsy]

How I learned to stop being angry and love the Death Scene (for now)

This may be a controversial take, but I've come to the conclusion that Izzy's death scene maybe wasn't badly written after all.

There is one big aspect of this scene that I really love: it was 100% in character for Izzy AND Ed (and everyone else too) at that point in their story.

BUT it only works if we are not expected to believe that 1. this was in any way a happy ending for any of them and 2. that this arc is finished.

If Izzy stays dead permanently, his death and the way it happened, what was said and notably what wasn't, was tragic for everyone involved - especially Ed - and we should feel bad about it. This isn't an uplifting scene of closure for either Izzy or Ed, and it is totally understandable that most Izzy fans were crushed by it (and Ed fans, even those who don't like Izzy, should be too!).

If there is no possibility that anyone, in any way, can talk to Izzy ever again and (in Ed's case) clean up the mess between them - then this is not a comedy any more. It's a tragedy. And it should be treated as such by the show and the creators (and this might be where disappointment lies waiting).

The death scene by itself though was fitting, if we look at where Ed and Izzy are on their character arcs at the end of S2. It played out exactly as I'd have expected.

Izzy - All about Eddie

The main problem I (and many others) had with Izzy's death scene is that it is all about Ed.

Izzy is apologizing for everything that happened, including Ed cutting his fuckin' leg off. He is reassuring Ed that he wants to go, it's ok, no need to be sad. He encourages Ed to be soft, emotional, himself. He tells him that his biggest fear, being unloveable to anyone except Izzy, isn't real - he has a family now.

And, now that I've had time to think about it, I realized: YES this is exactly what Izzy would do.

All of S2 was about Izzy breaking the chain, but until the end it was still all about Ed for him (because it's not as easy as cutting off a rotten leg, unfortunately). Izzy would make his last moments about Ed, trying to do as much good as possible in the short time he had left. Or, trying to undo as much of what he thought he'd done wrong.

And I really don't want to take away from Izzy's accomplishments and character growth in S2. He'd come so far already! After years and years of singleminded devotion and love he'd finally realized that their form of entanglement was destructive.

Izzy broke up with Ed in Ep2 - and it almost killed him both of them. He started to look for meaning outside of his relationship with Ed, rediscovering aspects of himself that had long been buried and forgotten. He began, tentatively, to form bonds to members of the crew and put himself out there, away from Ed's side, away from being Ed's voice and Ed's hands, ruled by Ed's emotions.

But there wasn't enough time: still, everything he did was, in one way or another, at least partly about Ed.

Whittling - a Blackbeard metaphor Training Stede - "What did he say about me specifically" La vie en rose - a love song about "the one" and promises for life Hiya boys - oh my god he's trying so hard here but this is killing him, isn't it Bonding with Stede at Jackie's - "He's a complicated man" The Ricky monologue - so much passion behind every word, not getting what you want, letting go of ego for something larger - the whole speech was (at least partly) about Ed

(I believe the first Ricky monologue about belonging is more about Ed than the crew and I know this is not a popular take. Still, for me it makes sense because this is how Izzy felt for decades. I don't think he has shaken that mindset yet - give up your ego, your own dreams and personality for something larger - Ed&Izzy or Blackbeard. When he says "he crew" it feels like a bit of an afterthought - there is a pause.)

So, at the end of S2, Izzy is not over Ed at all - he's deeply hurt, feels incredibly guilty (unreasonably so!) and is repressing a lot of what happened.

He's still so entangled with Ed - if this is his last chance to make things right, he will.

And as much as I would have loved seeing Izzy dying surrounded by his loving family, he wasn't there yet. Not as long as Ed was around. And I think the crew understood. They understood Izzy more then he understood himself at one point ("You're in a toxic relationship with Blackbeard"). They understood what he was going through, and they gave him space to say goodbye to the man he had loved for his whole life.

Izzy died how he lived - all wrapped up in Eddie. And at this point in his life, I wouldn't have expected anything else.

Ed - All about us, you and Me

I love the symbolism of these 2 frames - while Izzy's bloody hand is entangled in Ed's hair until death (and beyond), Ed's bloody hand is putting a distance between Izzy and everyone else but himself.

I wonder how Ed would have taken it if it had been the other way round - if Izzy had found himself a Stede at the start of S1.

I think not well is an understatement.

Even though Ed seems constantly annoyed by Izzy in S1 (and violently destructive towards him in S2), at no point did I get the impression that he actually wanted Izzy to leave, for Izzy to love him less intently or be less devoted.

But, it wasn't very much about Izzy as a person, or Izzy's happiness, or their shared happiness anymore. I think Ed saw himself and Izzy as "together forever, us two against the world", but without putting any work in or pausing to think how Izzy was actually feeling (and I am 100% sure that Ed knew how much Izzy loved him and how little love he got in return).

But being with Izzy was Ed's whole life, they were two halves of the same whole, and Ed even kinda expected Izzy to stay around after he fell in love with Stede ("We could have worked this out!") and didn't really think about how this never, ever could have worked out for the kind of relationship they were having (this is how Steddyhands... was so compelling actually).

So is it any wonder that, in Izzy's last moments on earth, Ed wants to have him all to himself? He sends Stede away. He signals the crew to stay (waaayy) back. He cradles Izzy in his arms, his back to the crew and everyone else who loved him.

And although, at the start, he tries to get a word in (to apologize back, to tell him he's forgiven) - Izzy dies without hearing anything that wasn't directly related to Ed and Ed's feelings.

Ed never tells him he loves him. He doesn't tell him how much Izzy will be missed for himself and not for what he could do for Ed. How important he was to Ed all those years.

The only thing Izzy gets from Ed before he dies is "You can't go. You can't leave me. Please! You're my only family."

What will happen to Ed? You can't do this to Ed! Ed has noone else! And as sad as this is, it is in character for him at this point in his life.

Ed is fundamentally a very self-centered (and self-hating) person, and his journey towards change had just begun with his death and rebirth. And just like Izzy, he would have needed much more time to grow (although Izzy'd gotten much, much further than Ed).

At Calypso's birthday, I think for the first time in forever, Ed saw Izzy as his own person, someone who he could actually love apart from this Ed-Izzy union they had going for so long. But only a few days (I guess?) later, Izzy dies.

So, at the end of S2, Ed still sees Izzy as "his" to a degree, sees him as one half of "us". He almost expects Izzy's last words to be about him (or them) and doesn't yet see Izzy as his own person, with his own feelings and ties to other people who might have wanted to say goodbye as well.

For Ed, Izzy died how he lived - wrapped up in Ed and Ed keeping everyone else away. Talking about himself only in relation to Ed. Izzy as a part of Ed that's vital and needed - but not itself in need of words of solace or other people's love (or any love, period).

Conclusion

At this point in Ed's and Izzy's life, the death scene and how it was written/acted is perfect, in my opinion. But for the characters, it's incredibly tragic.

Izzy never got what he wanted most - Ed's love. He died believing almost his whole life was a mistake, keeping Ed from his true self for far too long and destroying him in the process. In the end, the crew who had unconditionally loved and accepted him, stood at a distance, and the man he still loved over anyone and anything else never told Izzy what he meant to him - and now he never will.

Ed was absolved of his guilt and maybe, in the moment, he even believed it. But of course everything that happened in S2, and everything before that, wasn't (only) Izzy's fault and in the future, Ed has to deal with that. Only now there is no Izzy here to work it through with, and to make amends, no one who was there for it all and who knows parts of Ed best. When Ed finally realizes what Izzy meant to him, it will be too late.

So, if we get a S3 and nothing is ever made of all of this, if Izzy is really dead and the Ed/Izzy dynamic is done and dealt with, then it was bad writing (and I am so afraid that will actually happen).

But as it stands, I'm beginning to love the scene for what it is: a tragic, consistent ending for two characters that I love deeply.

But please don't tell me this was a kind ending.

[xoxoskai]

THE WHITE MASK THEORY;

PART TWO

Before I go into detail about Ava and her relationships with the Heathens, I want to clarify a few things.

I wasn't aware that Rina had confirmed that we haven't met WM yet. A lot of you pointed it out in the previous post and that's how I found out. However, I think it's even more anti-climactic if it's someone we haven't met so far to be WM because there will be no excitement involved in the grand reveal. A five-book buildup for it to be someone completely new is not dramatic or shocking at all. It'll be like the no-name nanny being the villain in God of Ruin. Most people, me included, were dumbfounded at the reveal and of course, Maya's ridiculous fall from grace.

How are you going to look at normal sibling jealousy and kidnap the sister because you thought it would do justice to the other one? You're telling me the Bratva with Kyle-fricking-Hunter, Rai-mother-Sokolov, Adrian-Daddy-Volkov as the Obschak and Kirill-dilf-Morozov as the Pakhan couldn't track down the silly nanny who kidnapped a mafia princess for shits and giggles? That they haven't been able to for the past decade? Make it make sense.

It would have made a lot more sense for it to be the Irish mafia back for more revenge.

Now, Eli King.

I swear, his character is all kinds of perfectly mysterious, makes him such an enigma.

Eli being awol most of the time can perhaps make him WM. Infact, him telling Killian "It's nothing personal, family business" before they waterboarded him could imply a lot more.

(Plus, Eli was the one carrying Niko out when he stabbed himself to save Jeremy and thus, missed Creigh getting shot.)

However, this also shows that Eli prioritizes his family over a game of tag with mafia heirs and the Heathens trying to off Creighton for being with Annika is not something he would let slide. Maybe he is closer to them than he lets on but Eli participating in the initiation feels like a far cry. Especially because Creigh has specifically mentioned that Eli is more of a strategist type, not known to use his fists to absolutely destroy someone.

Eli having his own inside contacts feels like a given. And I do believe it's a huge give-and-take type of scenario. Eli, heir to the King Empire, I'm sure realizes the importance of having connections. Especially connections with the mafia. I'm guessing his point of contact would be Killian in that scenario.

Interestingly, someone I accidentally left out in my observations is Kayden.

For everyone who doesn't know who Kayden is, he made his first appearance in God of Ruin and is confirmed to be Gareth Carson's love interest.

In my defense, we haven't seen a lot of him at all. But is he a viable candidate? Absolutely. Would I be disappointed to see him as WM? Absolutely not.

What, however, will disappoint me is that Gareth Carson being the green mask and Kayden being the WM, DO NOT GET A BOOK. AND THAT IS TOO CRUEL. AN MLM, PROFESSOR X STUDENT WHERE THEY ARE BOTH PARTAKING IN THE INITIATION FOR WHATEVER GOD-FORSAKEN REASON AND IT BEING THE PEAK OF FORBIDDEN ROMANCE IS,

You guessed it,

Not getting a book.

This is the exact same reason why I ruled out Remi Astor as well. If WM is simply meant to be a side character, why would they be such an enigma? Why is there not a book?

Kayden also checks a lot of the WM boxes of

Being leaner than the rest, hello he's a professor. He's not going to be fighting for his life every day in the mafia (or he might, we don't know his origins)

Cherry would not be able to seduce him. Kayden plays for the same team so, yes, it makes sense.

In the epilogue of God of Wrath, we see Jeremy proposing an initiation where they chase a pre-decided target only. We know why Nikolai, Killian and Jeremy would appreciate it, Gareth was not having it, but WM was. (It feels like repetition but Gods, the hatecrime it is to not have their book).

But the prospect of the Heathens allowing a professor at their university into the mix seems a little far-fetched. Not to mention, I think it was clearly stated that Kayden had arrived at Brighton recently and there was no mention anywhere of WM being a recent member.

Now, Ava Nash.

Remember I said, "Eli realizes the importance of having connections with the mafia"? That it's a give and take? If Ava Nash is really WM,

Do we really believe Eli wouldn't know?

Do we really believe he would not be keeping tabs on her?

Now, the million-dollar question is - what do the Heathens gain from forming an alliance, as discreet as it is, with Eli King?

The most I can think of is, Brighton is basically RES' turf. The Heathens are far from their powerful parents and between the mafia and the powerful families of London, The Kings, The Nashs, The Knights and The Astors hold a lot more power and influence. At some point, I'm sure they would call in a favor when the times comes for it, to wipe out the Irish mafia's main base or whatever it is these people want to do.

Would Eli really not keep tabs on Ava after two of her closest friends start dating two leaders of the Heathens?

Between all the Heathens and Ava, I think she has the most complicated and interesting relationship with Jeremy.

"Say the word and I'll bring him to you?" Bestie hasn't exchanged a single word with that man as far as we know.

"When she's not around?" What context and scenario would lead Jeremy to meet Ava when Cecily isn't around? ("Break Ava"? Bro we know you're a mafia prince but the little princeling of the King household would uproot your family if you tried. )

Jeremy, as the leader, obviously knows who the WM is.

The scene is God of Wrath where Cecily is following Ava outside before encountering Jeremy is single-handedly carrying my theory.

-> Ava, drunk, still seemed to know her way around the forest behind the Heathens mansion despite only exploring it once with Cecily and Annika (God of Pain, Chapter 5)

-> Jeremy, when spotted at the beginning, is wearing a jacket that he's discarded by the time he finally encounters Cecily. Unless my man wants to flex his Russian roots and channel his inner Queen of Arendelle, it does not make sense for him to lose his jacket when stepping out of the house.

-> Cecily is tracking Ava using an app on her phone when she suddenly changes directions back towards the house at an alarming speed that indicates she was on the back of a motorbike.

This brings me to my theory that-

It is not surprising that Jeremy was out of the house as soon as Cecily was. Which means, he'd have gone ahead and intercepted Ava first to send her back. His jacket is missing cuz, she was wearing a short skirt and was going back on a motorbike, so she needed coverage.

Yes, shocker that Jeremy is being civil to her, but I need to remind you this is much earlier than him falling for Cecily + the entire AnniCreigh shitshow. So, if Ava is really WM, to some extent, he was probably civil with her.

Either Ava went back with a bodyguard or someone else with connections to the mafia (*cough* Heir of the King Empire *cough*) was informed and came to pick her up.

The Heathens would gladly form an alliance with Eli just for inside intel about their girls all the time and vice versa if Ava really is WM.

Interestingly, according to the timeline, this is also the part where in God of Pain, Creighton tells Eli that if he's so bored, he should go to Ava and gets "If I go to her, I'll kill her" in response.

Is this because he found her wandering by herself through the forest at midnight?

Is this because she refuses to disassociate with the Heathens?

Theories, theories, everywhere.

Now, if Ava is really WM, why would Jeremy make her cry?

Because Ava made Annika cry, It's that simple.

When I tell you it's only Landon King and Killian Carson who don't care about their siblings, I mean it. Jeremy and Annika are obviously close enough to want to die for one another and if someone comes up to your sibling and calls them a murderer after they shoot someone to protect you, yeah, I'd have a vendetta against that person too, part of my cult or not.

Jeremy obviously hated Cecily at some point for it too. At how easily they all abandoned Annika and while I understand that she was new to their group as compared to Creighton who they've known their whole lives, Ava might have taken it too far by calling Annika a murderer, something Jeremy obviously heard of.

In Ava's defense, they probably felt guilty for ever including Annika in their group and causing the chain reaction of Creighton falling for her because it led to him being in a coma.

Naturally, Jeremy doesn't care about that. Ava name-calling Anni became personal to him because 1, she's his baby sister and 2, Annika was in that predicament cuz she shot Creigh for him.

At the same time, I was really mad at Cecily for not defending her childhood best friend because whatever happened to sisters before misters? Sometimes the girls only seem like friends to me for the sake of the plot considering how little they know of each other.

In God of Malice, when Killian swaps in for Nikolai and is about to go against Creighton, who is giving Glyndon a run-down about the Heathens?

Go ahead and take a guess.

How, and I can't say this enough, does she know so much in excruciating detail about the Heathens when she's never interacted with them, and they are from a completely different university? Everyone always asks her how she knows so much, and she deflects with -You have to be living under a rock to not know- when the actual situation is that no one but Ava knows so much.

You seriously can't believe the Heathens are observant to the point of knowing every little, tiny detail about their girlfriends, quirks only a childhood friend would know?

And no, Eli King, close ally or not, would not divulge all this freely. You know who would? Someone who wants to see their girlfriends get laid and happy.

I think the most fascinating thing about Ava being the WM is that I can't, frankly, think of a single reason why she would be a part of the Heathens except that she thrives on chaos (hello daughter of Cole Nash).

But it is entirely plausible that if the Heathens send initiation invites to the Elites who never attend it, chances of Ava swiping the QR code thru someone's phone is very likely.

What does Ava bring to the Heathens?

Honestly? No idea. If it was in exchange for being close to their respective s/o, it'd make sense, but WM is already part of the initiation way before God of Malice.

Did they have a particular initiation to recruit a fifth member for their close circle? Probably. Were they looking for someone who'd be willing to betray the Elites? Maybe. If Landon and Ava have a completely different type of understanding between them, do we really believe Landon to be above using Ava to spy for the Heathens? If no, why the Heathens would still allow her among them remains a mystery. Did they not know who she was related to? Did she pass the initiation with flying colors and show potential to be a part of the inner circle?

(Eli is family man first, which is why I can't see him being a Heathen)

What I do know is that Ava feels lonely among her own circle. With all her friends now spending more time with their boyfriends, she feels alone (God bless Remi, he's going to be such a good brother-in-law after being an already awesome friend to her).

I also believe that if Ava would tell anyone she was part of the Heathens, it'd be Remi. They are a lot closer than they portray.

You know who else was shit at keeping secrets, was out-going, definitely the social butterfly of the group but had a truckload of demons in their closet? Ronan Astor.

This is why, I refuse to underestimate Ava. "Disappears like a ghost" is a very interesting choice of words.

Besides, if she's really WM, she's so unserious.

Also, possible foreshadowing?

Anyways, considering Ava is also pretty close to Brandon, we'll be seeing a lot of her in God of Fury which will finally reveal who WM is. She has no interactions so far with Nikolai or Gareth for me to deduce anything between them so 6th December, we'll find out!

For now, and perhaps always (I'll reject canon I don't care) my suspect is Ava, who's yours?

[rotiaftermath]

ur url is rotiaftermath, but i don't think i've seen any headcanons from you about how a roti aftermath would actually work or happen... so do you have any? Im so curious!

IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A GOOD AMOUNT

Ok so

-staci aftermath host. Yeah I think in universe they’d keep Brigette and Geoff (and maaaaybe blaineley) for like nostalgia/gen 1 fan bait but also. New gen new host. Also also staci deserves to have a character dammit

-Dakota would be annoyed at Staci becoming the host and I think it would cement her decision to return to the island

-gen 1 would come back as the peanut gallery

-I think overall the format would be similar to the aftermaths of action and wt but I would also include a segment where the peanut gallery is asked their opinion about the interviewed contestant and predictions for the competition for that sweet gen 1/gen 2 interaction

-for an Overarching Aftermath Plot™️ we’d focus on Staci and her loneliness. She agreed to be aftermath host so she’d have a chance to connect to/befriend the other contestants and past contestants

-while I don’t think the producers would go through the truth or whatever segments again I think they’d use Staci’s desperation to connect to others to get her ask crueler hard hitting questions to prove her worth or whatever (people value honesty after all. Who would want to befriend a liar? She’s gotta prove she’s more than that)

-I think Bridgette and Geoff would try to steer her to y’know. Not Do That but in her insecurity she’d end up thinking its proof that she’s not good enough and end up doubling down on it

-Dawn would too for that matter but she also has a tendency to say too much and staci would interrupt/talk over her so she wouldn’t reveal her lying and shit and inadvertently shoot her attempts down

-I think either a. someone would give her a taste of her own medicine and see how she likes being interrogated or b. She would accidentally step on a land mine and make someone cry (probably someone everyone likes like brick or someone who’s seen as too tough to cry like Anne Maria) and realize how much a dick she was being and apologize and admit she just wanted friends. And she would get some

For actual interview shenanigans:

-B’s interview would involve at least part of the time dedicated to try and get him to talk. This would inevitably fail

-I mentioned some of the Dawn stuff but someone (probably Noah but I could see Duncan or Heather doing it too) would interrupt and call her aura reading bullshit. Naturally she would reveal something personal and embarrassing about them

-Sam would be the most satisfied with his time on roti to the point where the usual frustrations about Scott don’t come up and naturally his crush on Dakota would be brought up and how they didn’t get together but at this point (iirc) he got her number so he’s chill with that to

-dual brick/Anne Maria interview. They would get the same questions and their answers would naturally contrast each other especially since brick would ultimately accept his elimination while Anne Maria would be frustrated about hers

-dakotazoid would not get asked many of the hard hitting questions because no one wants to make the ten foot tall mutant with super strength mad buuuut she’d be surprisingly satisfied with her time there albeit pissed off at Chris for making her an intern and sending her into the mine in the first place

-Sam would be in her lap the whole time (yes this deserves its own bullet point)

-Mike’s interview would involve the system interjecting with their own thoughts about their time there and Mike would be more accepting and not frustrated about it also wouldn’t be able to help myself and would probably throw something in about him being disappointed about what happened with Scott and give it some homoerotic undertones teehee

-there would be some closure on the vitomaria shit. But that might not be completely resolved until Zoey’s interview because ideally Anne Maria and Vito would date but Zoey would need to be in the loop for that

-Jo’s interview is one I could really see the role reversal stuff happening if Staci’s plot line went that route but regardless she would begrudgingly admit she’s proud of Cameron

-Scott… sighs fang mauling him would likely be retconned so he could have an interview. Also because that shit sucked ass

-for the actual contents of the interview this is another one I could see the role reversal stuff happening. Or have everyone he eliminated go to town on him that would be fun too

-Zoey’s… I’m not too sure about. Would make her be really frustrated at a stupid jock getting her out and hate Lightning though

I think that’s all I have??? Thanks a ton for the ask!!

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

I need more of my man Charles Grey~ What kind of wedding would he like? Any other fun details? :3c

my mans too!!! lots of fun to be had here :D

Really, he’s not too fussed about letting his S/O handle most of the arrangements for the planning itself. As invested as he is in the marriage, he’s indifferent to a lot of the smaller details. Does (Name) want some odd, unconventional flower as decoration instead of something like roses or lilies? That’s fine by him; he has no strong opinions on the flowers anyway. Is it their dream to have a specific song for their first dance as newlyweds? He’s more than glad to let them have that dream, because he doesn’t have a song in mind. Most of his passiveness in planning, actually, are just because he hasn’t thought about these things. So if he hasn’t put any thought into it, why not let his S/O have their way with those details?

It’s not that he’s unromantic! He wants to be more involved than he is, but… he just doesn’t have any ideas or big preferences with most of these things. He’s overjoyed that he found someone to spend his life with ― he simply never expected to get married. His entire life has revolved around service to Her Majesty. Duty, honor, swordfighting, danger. Who in that line of work devotes the thought to dragging someone else into a life like that? He doesn’t think he’s good at planning due to not having a true vision. He just wants to get married, he doesn’t care how it happens, so he hopes that doesn’t make him seem as if he doesn’t care.

The biggest influence he has is to gently prod… and prod… and prod… about the flavor and decoration of their wedding cake. He’s less picky about the decoration, though he still wants it to look impressive and traditional. And, it’s not that he has a specific flavor in mind for the cake. It’s quite the opposite, in fact! He has such a wicked sweet tooth, he needs help narrowing down what flavor would be best for one of the most important days of his life. It’s the most passionate his S/O will see him about any of the wedding preparations. Maybe that’s a good thing? His eyes light up while he’s discussing it with them. Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, lemon, almond, velvet… all of them would be perfect, he’s so conflicted and he needs their input!!

… Best man Phipps? Oh, yes, definitely, best man Phipps. The man isn’t only Grey’s name twin; he’s Grey’s closest friend and confidante. They’ve been through a lot together whilst in service to the Queen, so Phipps is probably well and truly the only person aside from his S/O that Grey fully trusts. Despite not being the most, er, verbose person, Phipps takes his role seriously. Up to and including making sure that (Name) is escorted safely to the entrance before he goes in to take his place next to his friend. He also manages to give a short but genuine speech, earning a hearty pat on the back from Grey and an affectionate hug from (Name).

During the first dance, Grey is almost quietly mourning the fact that he’s never thought about all of this. He hasn’t been planning his picture-perfect wedding since he was a young boy, like a lot of children do. Even if he never gave a care to some details, it disappoints him that he… didn’t really think about it at all. He loves his S/O with all his heart. Why did he never consider that he could care so deeply about someone, to the point that he saw himself never getting married? Did he not think he was capable of a good relationship, or did he doubt his ability to commit at all? He makes sure to give his new spouse plenty of kisses during the dance, holding them tenderly, whispering to them that he loves them so much. That he doesn’t have the words to describe how happy he is to be their husband. He just… feels the need to make up for his supposed apathy during the planning, by assuring them that being married to them is the most incredible thing he’s done with his life so far.

Feeding each other cake gets huge laughs from everyone in attendance, even Her Majesty. Why? Well… only because Grey is so eager to finally get a bite of his wedding cake that he ends up ‘coming in hot’, so to speak, and gets frosting and crumbs all over his face. He looks horribly undignified, and his face is red from embarrassment under all that cake, but if nothing else, it’s definitely a memory to make him smile once he’s cleaned up.

[magic-and-maybess]

A semi-formal review of pre Critical Role live action Ashley Johnson content

*this is not an exhaustive list, just the films/shows I've watched personally. yes i am biased. Blindspot is not included but I do have many positive feelings about seasons 1 and 2*

Crime Scene Investigation, season 7 episode 21 : Ending Happy (2007)

Character - Dreama Little

Plot -

When a has-been boxer is killed, the team must establish which of several life-threatening acts actually ended his life.

Review -

As someone who hasn't seen any CSI prior to this, I thoroughly enjoyed it. This episode puts Ashley in the shoes of a sweet prostitute with a southern drawal and more smarts than one would expect.

The episode was engaging and made me feel very empathetic for Dreama. She certainly stood out from the main cast in just a few scenes.

Rating - 8/10

Spooked Episodes 1-4 (2014)

Character - Morgan

Plot -

Five paranormal investigators help the citizens of their city with everything from ghost sightings to possession and aliens.

Review -

This was a decent, turn-off-your-brain spoof on paranormal investigation shows. I found the writing to be a little shotty at times and many things could have been fleshed out more. Despite this, it was an entertaining binge at only 4 20 minute episodes available for free.

I found Ashley's character one of the most entertaining of the group. Quickly, a love triangle forms around her and sets off a lot of drama within the team but the resolution was an oddly sweet one.

Rating - 6/10

Annie : A Royal Adventure (1995)

Character - Annie Warbucks

Plot -

In this sequel to the 1982 film, Annie and her friends venture to England where hijinks ensue and the preteens must stop a plot to overthrow the monarchy.

Review -

This was a fever dream of a film, but in a fun way. I didn't expect much going into it, and I wasn't disappointed. It was very childish but not in an annoying way. There was a song, which I enjoyed.

Rating - 5/10

The Failures (2003)

Character - Lily/Lilian

Plot -

When a misfit teenager meets a suicidal outcast, she comes up with a plan to help him kill himself. Too bad love gets in the way.

Review -

This was the best movie I've watched in a while. I was completely engaged. The writing was witty, nuanced, and every character was so well done. Neither cynicism or optimism was the right answer, life just is what it is.

Ashley gave a standout performance here. Lily is so well done. She's not good or wise, she's just a dumb 17 year old who thinks she knows everything. Her intentions and motivations are messy just like everyone else here. Nobody is fully bad or good. They're all just people.

Rating - 10/10

Growing Pains : The Movie (2000)

Character - Chrissy Seaver

Plot -

Jason and Maggie Seaver move back to their hometown so Maggie can run for public office. Quickly, things spiral into a mess when the kids get involved.

Review -

This movie was... fine. It did what it was trying to do, I think. When viewed as a continuation of the original series, it falls a little flat. I found Carol's relationship drama to be really boring, and the writers seemed confused on who they wanted Chrissy to be. Overall, there was a lot going on in this that makes it the far weaker of the two.

Rating - 4/10

Growing Pains : Return Of The Seavers (2004)

Character - Chrissy Seaver

Plot -

Jason and Maggie are finally ready to sell the house and see the world now that the kids have all moved out. As it turns out, this is not okay with the oldest Seavers, and shenanigans ensue.

Review -

This is the far better of the two Growing Pains movies. The plot is much more engaging and the characters feel more like themselves. Chrissy also gets a lot more of a plotline here as she deals with her awful love life. Overall, it's a better version of what happens to these characters 15 years later.

Rating - 6/10

Otis (2008)

Character - Riley Lawson

Plot -

Teenage girl Riley is the newest victim of serial killer/degenerate loser Otis, who just wants to take a girl to "prom". When a misunderstanding between Riley and her family occurs, they devise a plan to murder her assaulter... and get the wrong guy.

Review -

The first half of this movie was tolerable, almost enjoyable. After Riley's escape, the entire thing goes downhill. Don't let the box art fool you, this is the worst movie I have seen in a *long* time.

The only redeeming quality was Ashley's acting. She was wonderful as always and was the only character I felt any positive emotions towards.

Rating - 3/10

[dimpledpran]

~ getting to know your BL mutuals ~

Rules: answer the questions and @ some people. Include the tag ‘g2ky BL mutuals 2022’ on your post so we can find everyone’s answer.

Thank you for the tag @morkofday​ ! As always, i enjoy reading your thoughts. Not al all surprised about how VV is basically your personality at this point.

Disclaimer: I am going to talk about series that I watched this year, and not just those that were released this year. I really didn’t watch all that much this year.

What have been the BLs that took you by surprise this year?

Bad Buddy: Really went into this with no expectations, and honestly I still don’t understand what made me watch this halfway through while it was airing, but best decision I made. (Well I kinda do regret not watching it from the start) It just completely consumed me. I love Patpran so much. They have taken over my brain and heart. I love how this series has such a good mix of humour, angst and is also more real/relatable with the issues they address.

Not Me and The Eclipse: Lumping this together here because I really did not expect any BLs that would address such heavy themes. I just wish they were handled a bit better.

Dew The Movie: I did not know anything about the movie going in, so watching what happened really threw me off. But it was a nice/wild ride.

Kieta Hatsukoi: Aoki and Hashimoto really stole my heart. I love how chaotic and hopeless they are. They were so dramatic but also quite relatable! 😂

What have been the BLs that you felt a bit disappointed with this year?

KinnPorsche: Maybe it’s because I had too much hope going in, or because it was so hyped up. Or maybe because I had a lot of personal stuff going on when it was airing, but I just couldn’t get involved with the series. The finale ended up confusing me instead of giving me conclusions, and I’m not really a fan of that. Thanks to friends on discord that helped me understand it a bit better. Though this series introduced me to Jeff Satur and I’ll forever be grateful for that!

The Eclipse: This series started out with so much potential! The pace was brilliant, the cast was incredible and they really were trying to address the hard topics in a metaphorical manner. But towards the end, it really started to show that they didn’t have enough time with the planning and post-production. It felt like such a rushed ending and was honestly disappointing. It could have been the top of the year if handled better.

What has been your favorite BL (watched) this year?

Bad Buddy: This is my ultimate BL at the moment. Not even for the year, but generally speaking. I Fell in love with PatPran. Pran is so damn relatable, like I’ve never identified with a character as much as I do with him. I can go rambling for days about BB, so I shall stop her and not bore people with my BB brainrot.

Vice Versa: As much as I am mad that we didn’t get a proper development/conclusion for TessTun, I still enjoyed this series. It was all the more enjoyable with all the screaming with Vish. But also as a very visual person who loves colours, this show stole my heart. I loved the colours and the visuals in this series. The locations were all so new and beautiful! As a sucker for a soulmate AU, I loved their twist on that trope! And of course Jimmy and Sea stole my heart.

The Eclipse: Yes, i know I said I was disappointed with it, but I also really enjoyed it. The ending did feel very rushed. But other than that, it was a really good series. The cast did a brilliant job! Like I knew they can all act, but honestly I was so impressed with their skills!! Khaotung and First had the most beautiful breakdowns, Khaotung also sold the bad boy attitude in the first 5 minutes when I was so used to seeing him as the sweet little brother character, and it was so refreshing to see a new side to Neo! So yes, I’d watch it all over again just for them! Also they did deliver a few surprises, so that was interesting.

Not Me: Again, I feel like the ending could have been more polished. It really showed that they were rushing with the filming and airing. GMMTV needs to stop rushing them and airing shows while they are still filming. It really destroys the quality. But it did well to address the heavy topics! Of course I love seeing OffGun in anything, but they truly had an amazing cast. I couldn’t stop looking at Mond, Sing, First and Gawin. Also I Fell in love with Film. This series also felt so real because it showed how life is very unjust, and it showed the problems of the common people. So it was very refreshing to watch.

Semantic Error: I loved how chaotic and awkward this was. Sang Woo is my precious child and I will protect him. It’s a simple plot, but they did well with it. Loved the balance of humour and drama. Also loved the editing in this show.

Badhaai Do (Technically not a BL, but it counts):

3 Will Be Free (Again not technically a BL, but it counts):

Favorite BL couples (not just of 2022)?

Patpran (Bad Buddy), Wangxian (CQL), PeteKao (Dark Blue Kiss), Gao Shi-de and Zhou Shu-yi (We Best Love), Wenzhou (Word Of Honour) [Is it obvious that I have a type? ]

What’s your non-BL favorite (watched) this year?

55:15 Never Too Late:

10 Years Ticket:

[edgysaintjust]

A little statement for clarification.

I do not mean to reopen the case, but there are a few things that I want to be clear as there was very little explanation done.

1. I brought up the issue that involved our community as a whole (as many people among us are both on tumblr and twitter, including most artists) without explaining the mechanics of the apps correctly. This led to strong confusion;

2. Displaying 18+ content in the public realm means to me allowing fully-open access for everyone; a regular post, if you will.

There are various ways on social platforms that allow us to reduce the audience, ie: making an account private, posting within an inner circle, sharing on a groupchat among friends, and likely many more.

I strongly believe there should be restrictions put on that and the content should not be public, but it doesn't mean hidden in the cupboard and never shown to the world; I cannot expect that from anyone. I just cannot accept it being displayed freely for just anyone, which always includes both younger people and people who didn't consent to see it [system on social platforms, and YES, including tumblr] can show you posts of people you do not follow. I'm in the second category; I expressed my personal view on using historical figures' public image in similar ways, but my personal opinion on it is irrelevant; I am not forbidding anyone to like what they do! I'm sorry if it sounded like I do. There was little opportunity to explain it correctly. Please, share your content, but have in mind that it's a dangerous case to post *for everyone*. It's explicit. Please consider many factors before you post.

3. I am deeply disappointed that there are community members who decided to openly support rape. While we should put regular 18+ content aside, rape is still rape. It's a disgusting crime and I believe that saying it should never be tolerated will be an objective, moral truth. Promoting sexual violence is a separate case, and I'm sorry I mixed those two up too much.

4. Barely related, but I wish to state: nudes aren't erotic by definition; it is nothing but the human body in its natural form, and nudity can be, but doesn't have to be sexual. If you wish to call me a hypocrite, please do, that's your right to, but have in mind that from an artistic point of view, that is simply not how things work. My nudes are nothing more than the study and appreciation of beauty of the human body.

If you read up to this point, I am grateful. I hope to continue this without reopening the topic for discussion. I am deeply sorry for everyone who felt wrongly offended by my words and whom I couldn't approach with a direct apology.

[queenimmadolla]

I saw your previous ask about being poc and need to vent about some bs I saw on the dash today. Someone sent an ask to a writer I follow and mentioned the fact that most fan art/moodboard etc inspired by fics in this fandom depict reader as white, saying it’s not their fault it’s just a thing that happens here, and another writer took it upon themselves to interpret that comment as them attacking the writer and blaming them for all of the white washing that happens in this fandom(??) and said all the art being white washed isn’t an issue and then derailed the entire point being made. And whenever a poc tried to step in and be the voice of reason, and point out that it IS an issue, and that the original ask wasn’t attacking that writer, they would get blocked. And ofc they’re just being encouraged by their white writer friends, and instead of focusing on the original point, which is the fact that practically all the fan art in this fandom is white-washed, all these people are derailing entire point trying to say that ask was attacking someone and coming to that writers “defense”. It’s so fucking stupid and it just shows that you can literally VISUALLY SEE that most fanart/moodboard etc in this fandom feature WHITE PEOPLE and point it out but you’ll still get blocked and jumped on. It’s not the most egregious example of this kind of behavior I’ve seen on this site but they were so grossly misinterpreting what was being said, and NONE of their friends tried to step in and reason with them. It makes me wonder why I’m still here when I know if I were to say something I’d be treated the same way. This just doesn’t feel like a safe space at all.

Ah, yes. A prime example of that ignorant unconditional support (again, remember we want to let our friends know when something can be improved or they’re in the wrong so it can be learned from and corrected, not encouraged) and unchecked privilege. I’m gonna have to cut this lol. Gotta number (1-5) my paragraphs so I know if tumblr eats any.

1. I have no idea when this occurred or who was involved, but based on what you said, whoever turned this into a witch hunt against POCs for being upset that writers can’t be a little more open with aesthetics should be ashamed of themselves.

2. This is actually a huge issue in the fandom and I’m glad you brought it up because let’s talk about it! I’m a writer, obviously, and somehow, I manage to not have a bunch of white girls (as I write for fem!reader most of the time) depicted in my aesthetics. Because it’s not that fucking hard to go into Pinterest and not look for white girls. My reader is black, I’ve stated this in my about me section, however I don’t go that into description so multiple races can see themselves in my work! I have no problem finding black!reader aesthetics, but I haven’t used them yet because I do want everyone to feel as though they can read my works, especially if it’s not a fic where I describe reader a lot (if I do describe reader then yeah the fic is getting black girl aesthetics)

3.) diversity is something that can be talked about and should be talked about without white people getting offended (feels like we’re in Big Brother lol). if a white person is taking offense, we might have a problem on our hands because why exactly are they offended about POCs pointing out that we see nothing but a white reader as these aesthetics? hmm…

4.) it’s not hard to make sure people feel included. Its a bit redundant to purposely try not to mention race descriptions (which has improved since I came into this fandom) only to intentionally depict reader as white in the damn aesthetic or mood boards. It’s really not, but what you state you witnessed is why I don’t go around talking to writers willy nilly. It’s why I don’t follow people right away because it’s so, so disappointing to see that they practice passive poc erasure and exclusion, and I understand that it may not be intentional but to get upset and turn it into an attack when it was a moment to educate??? Nope, unfollow. The writers on here I consider my friends, whom I interact with are actually pretty amazing about this. Either they don’t use aesthetics at all (they use gifs of the ST character) or they use multiple girls of the aesthetic they’re going for (I see a white girly girl aesthetic, a brown skinned girly girl aesthetic, and a dark skinned girly girl aesthetic in the same fics and mood boards!) or they simply don’t care to ensure the reader they want to depict in those aesthetics is always white so I see dark skinned girls, brown skins girls and white girls in rotation of those aesthetics!

5.) exclusion is something they do not face, which is why they don’t care. if you attempt to educate them, and they react the way you said they reacted, I’d just dump them. I’d of course bring up the occurrence when talking about the topic for the rest of eternity because I’m petty and they gave me the perfect example, but if they don’t want to step out of their privileged bubble and go on the offense to ensure they can remain in their ignorance is bliss mindset, then I don’t want ‘em. There’s plenty of other writers willing to make sure you feel included and are willing to learn, without dogpiling on you like that 🩷

[lady-phasma]

Regarding that Master ask. I agree with the anon. The Master is adored by whovians. And people defend all their rights and all their lefts. Genocide, murder, abuse, anything. Maybe because the Master has been a villain from the start and people like them as such? While Daemon is supposed to be grey but is portrayed as coal one. And some fans hate him for such inconsistency?...

I'll link the ask here and here's a screenshot:

That ask wasn't sent to me but @theblackqveen directed the anon to ask me if they chose to. They haven't yet but I'll use this opportunity to answer both asks. I hope that's okay with you, anon.

I definitely agree that part of the appeal is The Master has always been a villain and most people love a good villain. I don't grant the premise of the original ask: there are no correlative characters in House of the Dragon. Having said that I'll say that it is unfair to any actor to make them a proxy for their character.

Let's assume that the "baddies" the original ask mentioned included Daemon because of the obvious Doctor Who connection (Matt). I think there are two major problems with this comparison:

Doctor Who has no source material - HotD does, which leads to...

Fans of Doctor Who can start anywhere in the series (I have an ask about this here) and it isn't particularly problematic. With HotD many fans watched because they love ASOIAF and all that encompasses.

So, how does that connect to this ask? Well, The Master has been created entirely by the show runners over the 59 years of the series. Fans have been able to watch The Master/Missy have conflict after conflict and character development that we haven't had time for in HotD. It has only had 10 episodes and has only been off the air for two months!! Additionally, it is natural but unfair to compare an adaptation (faithful or otherwise) to the source material. Yes, I do it too, but it usually results in disappointment for everyone involved.

Whovians are lucky in this regard: we have no source material and canon can shift. Not that I think that HotD is the "little series that could" but, as I have said before, we have more than a dozen characters in less than 600 minutes. Wanna do the math with me on DW? Nope, I don't want to either. Even with companions sharing the spotlight that's a lot of screen time for one character.

Now, Daemon as a morally grey character. That's something that most of the fandom who discuss Daemon at all seem to have the biggest struggle with. Some fans feel that he was more nuanced in the books and others feel like he is more dastardly (I love that word) in the series. Guess what? Of course he was more nuanced in the book - that's generally one of the great things about books. Perhaps that is from where the hate arises. I don't understand hating a fictional character with the energy I see in this fandom. I can't expend that much energy hating a real person (I actually never use the word "hate" in my life because it's a waste of time to hate.)

Maybe one day I'll write a straight-up opinion about tv-Daemon but for now I'll wrap up with this: regardless of what the show runners have chosen to do with the "baddies," or even which characters might be baddies in their plans, we haven't had enough time with any of the aged-up actors yet. If the series does as is planned (3-4 season total I think) then we have time, we can choose to be patient and see where they lead us. Or we can throw in the towel because it hasn't started the way some of us want. Perhaps the biggest disservice to the HotD series is that it has source material that fans can use to backup "should"s and "should not"s.

(Okay I did want to after all because I can't help myself: depending on how they are counted there are approximately 862 episodes, runtimes vary but can be anywhere from 25 mins to 50 mins, for this ridiculous exercise let's say 30 mins - that's 25,860 mins. For comparison Aemond had less than 15 mins on screen in season 1.)

[sunshineandaisies]

Dirty Paws & Wet Kisses

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Modern AU)

Words: ~3.7k

Warnings: language, floofs and fluff

Note: if you ever read anything written by me that includes dogs, their names will always be kinda extra or related to historical figures (i.e. my dog is actually named Theodore Roosevelt) and I will try my best to make their names increasingly extra with every fic that involves dogs

You’d argue that your four year old sheperd mix was the most well behaved dog in all of New York until your dying breath.

Most days.

During your weekly trips to the park on Sunday afternoons, she would sit at your feet, lounging in the sun as she watched joggers go by and playfully saying hello to anyone - be they human or dog - that stopped by to pet the pretty pup while you read whatever book you’d picked up from the bookstore earlier that week.

Sure, there were a few times that she would whine and stare down any squirrel that strayed too close to her, but she never left your side.

Maybe that’s why you had grown so complacent, why you’d stopped looping her leash around the bench to secure her to your side and simply kept the leash within your reach beside you on the seat of the bench.

And it was because of that complacency that you were sprinting across the park, chasing your naughty dog and drawing judgemental stares from other park-goers.

“Hazel!” you called after her. “Hazel, I swear to god I’m taking all your toys away when we get home!” Right after you took a nice long bath to soothe your aching muscles. When was the last time you’d run this much?

You lost sight of her when she disappeared around a hedge, and the internal panic that set in was almost worse than the time that you accidentally emailed your creative writing professor the Harry Potter fanfiction you’d written instead of your final paper. (You still got an A on the assignment, but that’s besides the point).

You see her as soon as you round the corner, happily licking at a stranger’s face as she sat between his legs, and-

Holy shit, your dog led you to the most attractive man you’ve ever seen.

The stranger took note of you before you had a chance to say anything, and he raised his brow at you while angling his face away from Hazel’s kisses. “Does this belong to you?” he asked, pinching the tags on Hazel’s collar between his thumb and two fingers. “Hazelnut Mocha.” He snorted. “Is that your dog’s name or your Starbucks order?”

You weren’t sure if it was the amused smile that curled his lips or the quirk of his brow, but his teasing made you feel personally attacked. You crossed your arms across your chest. “Maybe it’s both.”

He shrugged, scratching the spot behind Hazel’s ear. “I suppose that’s one way to never forget your dog’s name or your coffee order.”

You hummed noncommittally before approaching and tugging Hazel away from the handsome stranger. It took considerably more effort than you had thought it would. “I’m really sorry about her,” you apologized. “She’s never like this. I don’t really know what happened.”

He brushed your apology off with a smile. “Don’t worry about it. If a cute girl wants to give me kisses, I certainly won’t complain.” He winked at you, and you wanted to just melt on the spot.

“Well, uh, I should, um-” You cleared your throat, stepping away and dragging a disappointed Hazel along with you. “Again, I’m really sorry. Even if you didn’t mind.”

You turned and hurried away before his smile made your mind any more frazzled.

Two weeks passed before you decided to show your face at the park again, and this time, you were sure to secure Hazel’s leash to your bench, ensuring that there would be no chases across the park and embarrassing encounters with handsome strangers.

The pup resigned herself to her fate and laid at your feet in the grass, her tongue lolling out of her mouth and her golden eyes shining in the sunlight. She greeted the other dogs that passed, and you thought nothing of it until you heard someone call her name.

Well, shit. You knew that voice. That voice had haunted your dreams for three nights straight after the incident two weeks ago.

“How have you been, pretty girl?” he asked, and you hesitantly lifted your gaze from your book to see him knelt in front of you, patting Hazel’s head as she yipped happily and dragged her tongue over his face in sloppy kisses.

Despite your proclivity to stare at handsome men that showered your dog with attention, your eyes were dragged away from the pair when a wet nose nudged your leg. “Well hello there,” you greeted the brown and white dog that sought your attention. You quickly marked your page and returned your book to your bag before petting your newest furry companion. “What’s your name, handsome?”

“Bucky,” the stranger answered.

You glanced up at him briefly before turning your attention back to the brown and white dog. “Aren’t you a handsome boy, Bucky. Yes, you’re so handsome,” you cooed. The stranger chuckled, and you glanced up expecting to see Hazel mauling him with more sloppy kisses, but instead, he was staring at you, amusement dancing in his blue eyes. “What?”

“I’m Bucky,” he clarified before nodding towards the dog. “That’s Dodger.”

“And you just assumed that I was talking about you when I called him handsome?”

And in complete contrast to how he had acted in your previous interaction, he actually looked embarrassed, nervously scratching the back of his neck while fending off even more kisses from Hazel. “I seem like a complete asshole, don’t I?” he asked sheepishly.

You laughed. “Well, I mean… Don’t let this go to your head or anything, but I suppose you are kind of handsome, too. You know, in a handsome stranger kind of way.” You felt your cheeks flood with warmth, and you averted your gaze, hoping he didn’t see just how flustered you were after your admission. You tried to breeze past it altogether by giving all of your attention to Dodger once again, petting him and praising him for being such a sweet boy.

After a moment of you and Bucky speaking only to each other’s dogs, you cleared your throat and commented, “I didn’t realize you had a dog. Was he at the park with you the day that Hazel practically assaulted you?”

“He’s not my dog.”

You blinked. “Oh. Is he your girlfriend’s dog?”

And just like that, all hints of embarrassment disappeared from his face. He quirked a brow and smirked at you. “My girlfriend?”

“Or boyfriend,” you added hastily.

He snorted and shook his head. “It depends on who you ask.”

You cocked your head to the side, and the action conjured up an image of Hazel doing the same whenever you would try to hold an actual conversation with her. “Uh, what?”

His gaze flitted to the ground as he smiled an amused little smile that had you biting your lip and shamelessly staring at the man. “It’s a bit of a joke among my friends,” he began. “Dodger is my buddy Steve’s dog. Some of our friends like to make it seem like we’re dating, but we definitely aren’t. We just know each other way too well.” His smile widened when he looked back up at you. “So to answer the question that you indirectly asked-”

You furrowed your brows in confusion. “What?”

“-I’m single, sweetheart.”

You gaped at him, trying to form an appropriate response. This man was frustrating - frustratingly handsome, frustratingly smug, frustratingly able to read you like a goddamn open book. How dare he correctly assume you were trying to figure out if he was single or not?

The sound of a phone ringing interrupted your thought process, and Bucky gave you an apologetic look after glancing down at his phone. “I gotta take this,” he told you. You heard him greet the other person on the other end of the call before calling for Dodger. As he turned to go, he paused for a moment, pressed the phone against the front of his shirt to muffle the receiver, and called over his shoulder. “See you around, Hazel and Hazel’s mom.”

Right. You never gave him your name.

You were cursing yourself for nearly a month for not getting his phone number before he disappeared, and you’d be lying if you didn’t admit that you had a smidge of hope that you’d run into him at the park again... But alas, no luck.

You were starting to think that you’d never see your handsome park stranger - although, he wasn’t really a stranger anymore, was he? - but exactly 37 days after your last encounter with Bucky (aka handsome park stranger), Hazel brought you back together in the most heart attack inducing way she could manage.

You’d been sitting on the patio of your favorite little cafe, catching up with Carol and Val over coffee and fluffy pastries, and Hazel had been behaving herself aside from the occasionally whining and begging when any of you would touch your food.

She was behaving until she wasn’t.

You still don’t really know what set her off, but one moment she was sitting prettily and staring up at you with her golden eyes and the next she was breaking free from her leash and sprinting down the street and out of your sight.

You posted on social media asking everyone to be on the lookout for your Hazel and called your friends to help you search for her. You spent hours walking up and down the city streets and through the park that you frequented with Hazel. You called all of the shelters and animal control to see if anyone had brought Hazel to them instead of calling you. You talked to anyone and everyone that you passed on the street, asking if they’d seen your girl.

You tried so much to get your girl back, but nothing panned out.

You were in tears and your feet were sore from walking all over the goddamn city by the time you and the others returned to your apartment, resigned to wait for someone to contact you. Just as you were about to say goodnight to everyone and turn in for the night (read: cry yourself to sleep), your phone rang, and an unfamiliar number flashed across the screen. You shushed your friends and answered the phone.

Please be someone who found Hazel. Please be someone who found Hazel. Please be someone who found Hazel.

“Hey, sweetheart.” Your heart leapt into your throat at the sound of his voice, and for a moment you forgot that you had just been on the verge of a panic attack. “Take a deep breath for me, okay. I can practically feel you panicking through the phone. I have Hazel. She’s okay.”

“Thank you,” you breathed, nodding at your friends in response to their questioning looks. “Thank you so much, Bucky. Is she okay? Where did you find her? Should I meet you somewhere?”

He chuckled. “She’s fine. A little dirty, but she’s fine. As for where I found here...Well, I think your dog has a little crush on me, sweetheart.”

You grabbed your jacket from the coat rack and slipped it on before grabbing your keys. “What does that mean?”

“I came home and found her wandering around the courtyard at my apartment.” He sounded far too amused with the situation, and you definitely weren’t feeling up to dealing with his smug attitude. “She certainly made herself at home here. I may need to fight for shared custody after this.”

You rolled your eyes. “Just tell me where I should meet you.”

“I’ll send you my address.”

And just as he had told you, as soon as you ended the call, he shared his location with you. You swiftly assured Carol and Val that Hazel was okay, and you asked them to lock up when they left before beginning your walk to Bucky’s apartment.

Ten minutes later, you were sat on the floor of his living room, holding Hazel close to you and alternating between scolding her and telling her how much you love her as you tried to hold your tears at bay. Bucky sat on the couch, arms rested on his knees as he watched the teary-eyed reunion with a small smile curling his lips.

“You know, sweetheart,” he spoke up, drawing your attention away from Hazel, and you finally noticed the muddy paw prints on the front of his white tee. “I’m not much of a dog-person but-”

You gasped, covering Hazel’s floppy ears. “How dare you say such nonsense in front of Hazel!” You pressed a kiss between her eyes, whispering, “It’s okay, girl. Bucky didn’t mean it.”

“I did,” he countered, chuckling when you glared at him. “I’m more of a cat-person, but I suppose I can make an exception for Hazel. After all, she seems pretty attached to me. Not that I can blame her.”

You snorted and rolled your eyes. “She has awful taste in men,” you teased.

“I don’t know,” he argued. “People say that dogs are impeccable judges of character.”

You stood, dusting your jeans off and turned to face Bucky. “Thank you,” you told him, the sincerity clear in your voice. “I don’t know what I would have done if I couldn’t find her. I- I seriously owe you. Whatever you want, just name it.”

His blue eyes twinkled with mischief, and you immediately regretted your offer. “What about shared custody of Hazel?”

“Whatever you want that’s not that, just name it,” you amended.

“What about a date?” he asked instead.

Your eyes widened in surprise and you gaped like a fish, mouth opening and closing, opening and closing, over and over again as you tried to form a response. You certainly hadn’t been expecting that. He watched you with curious eyes, waiting patiently for your answer. Finally, the gears in your brain began to turn again and you answered, “As flattered as I am, I’m not really looking to date right now.”

Disappointment flashed across his features, but he smiled and all trace of disappointment was gone in an instant. “Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. You don’t owe me anything for being a decent person and making sure Hazel got back to you.”

You smiled softly at him, your fingers carding through Hazel’s fur. “Thank you, Bucky. Really.”

“You’re welcome, sweetheart.”

After that night - and after you and Bucky officially had each other’s numbers - you and he would text throughout the week, and you often sent him pictures of Hazel being increasingly goofy as the days wore on. You’d even invited him to the park one Sunday to see Hazel again, but he’d quickly turned you down, asking for a rain check.

He had a date, after all.

So instead, you took Hazel to the park and sent him pictures of the pretty pup lounging in the sunshine, greeting other dogs that passed by, and even licking the camera lens on your phone when she finally noticed you holding your phone out towards her to get the perfect angle. A smile never failed to appear on your face every time he sent a heart eyes meme in response.

Despite the near constant texting, you didn’t see Bucky again for over three weeks, and you’d only seen him because you had run into his friend Steve at the dog park.

It took a moment for you to realize that the brown and white dog that Hazel had instantly greeted once she’d been released from her leash was Dodger, but as soon as the realization sunk in, you looked around for Bucky.

There weren’t many people present, but you couldn’t find Bucky among the dog parents that lingered around the edges of the dog park.

You crouched down to greet Dodger, scratching him behind the ears and happily accepting his greeting kisses. “Hello, handsome. Is your uncle Bucky here?”

“Y/N?”

You turned your head in the direction of the voice, and you furrowed your brows when you saw a tall blond man that you didn’t recognize. Holy shit, was Hazel a handsome stranger magnet? “Do I know you?” you asked, doing your absolute best to keep your voice steady.

“Right, sorry,” he laughed. “I’m Steve. Bucky’s mentioned you a few times.”

You put two and two together quickly. “You’re Dodger’s dad!”

You spent the better part of the next hour chatting with Steve as Dodger and Hazel chased one another around the enclosed area, and you sent a picture of you and Steve to Bucky, happily claiming that Steve was telling you all of Bucky’s most embarrassing stories. (Bucky had sent a text to Steve within seconds of reading your text, but Steve refused to tell you what Bucky had said all while laughing so hard he nearly cried).

By the time Hazel and Dodger were laying at yours and Steve’s feet, panting and entirely worn out from an afternoon of playing, you were ready to say your goodbyes, but Steve quickly caught your attention before you could go.

“I’m meeting Bucky and a few other friends at the bar in about an hour. Would you be interested in getting a drink?” he asked, smiling so widely at you that you just couldn’t say no.

And that was how, after dropping Hazel off at home and making sure she was fed and had a full bowl of water, you found yourself at a sports bar, slinking through the Friday night crowd towards a table in the back.

You spotted Bucky immediately, and you smiled widely when his eyes widened and he choked on his beer before promptly standing to greet you. “What are you doing here, sweetheart?”

“Sweetheart?” you heard one of the men you didn’t recognize ask the others.

“Y/N,” Steve explained, and as if that was all they needed to know, the other two nodded. Steve smiled up at you, greeting, “Glad you found the place okay.”

Bucky quickly ushered you into the booth, sticking you between him and the only other woman present. As he introduced you to the others - Clint, Sam, and Nat - his arm snaked around your shoulders casually.

“So you’re the famous Y/N,” Sam asked, a teasing smile on his face as his gaze flitted from you to Bucky, and Bucky groaned in response.

You chuckled. “I wouldn’t necessarily say ‘famous’.”

“Oh, trust me,” Sam said, “as much as this guy talks about you, I’d say you’re pretty damn famous in our circle.”

You glanced at Bucky, biting your lip in a futile attempt to hide your amused smile. “Is that right?”

He huffed. “Hazel’s the real famous one, sweetheart.”

“Liar,” Nat accused. She turned to you, one perfectly shaped brow raising. “For weeks, it was Hazel’s mom this and Hazel’s mom that, and after that it was Y/N sent me this picture and Y/N told me this joke. I feel like I already know you, and I just met you.”

“So how’s Hazel?” Bucky asked in a clear attempt to change the topic. “Did she have a fun day with Dodger?”

You spent your evening getting to know Bucky’s friends better, sharing stories about Hazel, and listening intently anytime one of them told you a story about Bucky that had your sides aching from laughter. At the end of the evening, you had four new contacts in your phone and plans to meet up with Nat for lunch the following week.

“Need me to walk you home, sweetheart?” Bucky asked when you walked out together, but you shook your head.

“Nah.” You held up your phone, showing him the screen. “I got an Uber.”

He shoved his hands in his pockets, nodding. “Okay. Text me when you get home?”

“Of course.” A red Toyota Camry pulled up to the curb, and after confirming it was the car that was supposed to pick you up, you stepped towards it. Ever the gentleman, Bucky opened the door for you, and you slid into the backseat. “Good night, Bucky.”

It was while you laid in bed that night, unable to sleep while Hazel snored beside you, that you realized that the handsome park stranger - the one that was more of a cat-person but would make an exception for Hazel; the one that was dating Steve depending on who you asked; the one that was constantly talking about you to his friends so much that they felt like they already knew you - had wormed his way into your heart.

Did that make Hazel your wing-woman? She certainly did have a proclivity for bringing you and Bucky together, even in indirect ways.

He was on your mind all night and throughout the following day, and by the time your customary trip to the park rolled around on Sunday afternoon, you were buzzing with anticipation. Would he be there again? Would Hazel inexplicably get loose from her leash and lead you straight to the man that had you feeling like a teenager with a crush again?

As romantic as it might have been, you didn’t want to leave those answers up to fate. Instead, you sent him a text not long after you woke up, letting him know where he could find you if he wanted to see Hazel that afternoon.

Unsurprisingly, it was Hazel that saw Bucky first that afternoon when he arrived at the park, and unsurprisingly, she tore her leash from your grip and sprinted towards him, nearly tackling him as he crouched closer to the ground to greet her.

Surprisingly, you were actually jealous of your dog as you watched her give him sloppy, wet kisses.

“What’s that look for, sweetheart?” Bucky asked, angling his face away from Hazel. “Everything okay?”

“Quick question,” you told him. “Is that date still on the table?”

He grinned at you with that smug grin that you had scoffed at the day you first met, that same smug grin that made your heart flutter in your chest and made your breath catch in your throat and made you want to press kisses to his face and-

“I was wondering when you’d take me up on the offer, sweetheart.”

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Dude socks was so domestic and cute and comforting I might cry!! Can I request a sirius black imagine where the reader is like a confident and fun/sarcastic person that is friends with the marauders and has a playful flirty relationship with sirius. They both like each other but the reader is kind of scared of commitment so they always take a step back whenever sirius takes a step forward and sirius finally corners them about it and finds out its readers insecurities and all ends well? Thanks!

She's not afraid [S.B]

Sirius Black x Reader

Word counts: 4.8k

A/N: This was a very entertaining request and it took a while because every day I feel like I'm going to pass out from nausea haha. But writing is super relaxing for me.

I was hoping it would be shorter and now I feel like something was missing, but I hope you like it. Especially you, nonny!

And thanks for your nice comment, I'm glad you liked "socks"

(The title refers to the song of one direction because it reminded me a lot of its lyrics)

"If you had to choose between a chocolate-flavored shit and a shit-flavored chocolate, what would you choose?" he murmured, his voice echoing through the room.

You and your friends were in the common room in the so-called “study group” that Remus had insisted on creating for the Defense Against the Dark Arts class and ended up with topics from the other subjects. It was true that everyone fulfilled the boy's whims, because none had the heart to say no to something (which he often took advantage of) and now every afternoon you met to read some documents, comment on your doubts and practice spells and even potions.

But if anyone couldn't take things seriously, he was Sirius.

The only thing that kept it there was his love for Moony and also the opportunity to watch you study for a full hour. Or watch you do anything, to be honest.

Everyone frowned at Sirius' question, not understanding the nature of it. James, who was the only one who could listen to him, was busy analyzing a herbology book in detail. And by analyzing I mean sleeping on top of it.

“The chocolate-flavored shit, of course. What good would it do you to have chocolate if it tastes awful?" you answered seriously. Suddenly all eyes in the room were on you and most of them seemed half disgusted half confused. "What? Sirius asked" you said shrugging your shoulders and pointing at him with an open palm. The young man grinned widely and you returned the same smile, both of you holding back the urge to laugh.

"I can always trust you, pretty," he said happily. "And now that I think about it, you're very far from me, don't you think? Let me get closer” he murmured determinedly, getting up from his seat with a book in hand and all the intention of placing himself in the same armchair as you. But halfway there an arm stopped him abruptly.

"Go back to your seat," Remus demanded, not looking away from his book. Sirius complained.

"Why?" he said indignantly. You turned your gaze to the notes you were analyzing, but the smile on your mouth didn't fade and Sirius noticed.

“Because having the two of you together is having a time bomb. Go back to your seat,” he murmured just as seriously. Sirius watched him and in the middle of his tantrum he wrinkled his whole face trying to imitate Remus "I can see you Sirius"

"Since you've been a prefect, you have become unbearable," he muttered.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing," he replied like a little boy, dropping on the couch and taking the book from him again in the middle of a snort. You watched him with amusement and he stared back at you, so you mouthed ‘Better luck next time as he looked back at his notes. You felt Sirius's gaze, it was not something easy to ignore, but you tried not to stop yourself from the spirit from passing all the subjects that had suddenly invaded you.

When you couldn't take it anymore you looked up and again mouthed ‘What?’ Trying not to get caught by Remus. Sirius sneakily pointed to a scroll and his quill and you knew what it was all about.

Turns out that Sirius was extremely smart when he put his mind to it and he himself had enchanted a couple of scrolls that only you and he knew about. When you wrote in one, it was reflected in the other and when you finished whatever you were writing this was erased. At first you had not believed him because doing that involved very advanced magic and Sirius was not the archetype of an exemplary student to do that. But once you tried them you realized that you had indeed underestimated the boy and the curiosity to know the most intelligent and creative part of him invaded you. I mean, he was when it came to the pranks but you never imagined a Sirius smart underneath the idler you knew.

Y/N, can I ask you a very personal question? he wrote it. You tried not to sound too concerned and replied:

You can do it, but I can decide not to answer it. It turned out that Sirius was really weird lately and you were worried about what he might say, but usually it was pure nonsense.

The scroll went blank and you waited a few seconds for Sirius's pretty handwriting to appear. You tried not to look at him too much because you knew beforehand that he would get a scolding from Mr. Lupin.

Are you a dementor? he wrote.

You frowned at the words, searching for some logical explanation for his absurd question. Obviously you weren't. Sirius, seeing your confused face, supported a giggle and wrote again.

Because you take my breath away.

You read the words, going over one by one, and couldn't bear the urge to look at Sirius over your glasses with that annoyed look that you liked to fake so he wouldn't notice that you actually liked his scoundrel flirtations.

That was horrible, Sirius.

I made you blush so I don't think it was that bad.

Of course I didn't do that.

Of course you did. He wrote. And you didn't want to look at him because you knew you would just agree with him and blush even more. You look beautiful when you do that, he added. You bit your lip and looked at the parchment for a few seconds just before writing on it.

Stop saying such things to me, Sirius.

What do you say? What do I continue to say to you my best compliments and flattering your qualities? Perfect.

You stifled a laugh and shook it softly, keeping that smile that Sirius loved to observe.

You considered him a wonderful, handsome and kind boy, who was always looking for a way to make you laugh. The spark between you was something that everyone could perceive, including yourself.

I need to study, Sirius. Goodbye. You wrote and that ended your little talk.

For the rest of the hour all your attention was focused on the topics you were studying: Aconite (also known as monkshood or wolfsbane) a mundane plant with magical properties. The name had seemed funny to you and Remus had assured that it had nothing to do with werewolves.

Herbology was a very simple class for you, especially with the help that sometimes the best student in the class gave you: Frank Longbottom.

"Well, the hour is up, do you want to discuss any of the issues or...?" he was interrupted by Sirius abruptly closing the book and who with a wave of his wand put away all his notes "Everyone except Sirius, would you like to discuss something?" he asked, rolling his eyes at the brunette's innocent smile.

You all denied and Lupin ended the meeting. Everyone scattered in different directions, including James who seemed to have magically awakened as soon as the hour was up, but you stayed in the sitting room with your feet tucked up on the red velvet chair.

"What happens?" Sirius asked from behind, not noticing your presence. He jumped onto the couch and flopped into it.

"Nothing, do I need to go where everyone goes all the time?" you asked raising an eyebrow. The boy smiled and shook his head as he leaned on one of his hands, closing the distance between you. "Weren't you the one who was dying to get out of here?"

"Correction: I wanted the session to end, at no time did I speak about the company" he replied and you smiled "Speaking of which, I was thinking..."

"You think?"

“When I want to do it, yes,” he said amused “But let me talk and then you make fun of me. I was thinking that this weekend we are going to Hogsmeade and I was wondering if you wanted to go somewhere "

"Sure!" You answered animatedly and his eyes lit up "Will the others go too?" You continued, but the boy was suddenly disappointed.

"Hmm, I was thinking of something... different."

"Different?"

“Yeah, something like… you know, you and me. Alone”

And with that, you were paralyzed in your place.

You'd been alone with him countless times, just like that time, but it was one thing to chat in his common room or in class and quite another to ask you out at Hogsmeade.

"Oh, sure. Something like… a walk or shopping for chocolate frogs at Honeydukes, right?" you said quickly, trying not to show your nerves.

"Hmm, I could think of something else like Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop," he said with a smile. You gulped and watched him with concern. That place was usually full of cheesy couples. "Even though I have all those pink things, I could take them if I'm with you..."

"No," you said abruptly. Sirius was silent and you watched his smile diminish considerably. “I mean, no… I don't wish we were alone. We are always accompanied by the group, why not do it now?” you asked with an awkward smile. The boy was close to you and apparently he did not expect that answer, as his face reflected it quite well. But you were too busy with nerves eating your stomach to notice.

"Uh... yeah, I guess I'll tell them then" he exclaimed softly.

"Yes! It will be more fun and we can go for butterbeer if you want. And I could buy you those sweets that you like, what do you say? " you asked trying to sound a little more animated. Sirius was good at pretending and his disappointed look on his was replaced by a smile in an instant.

"Yes, that would be fine" he replied. His hand traveled to your cheek and he ran over it gently, resting at the base of your jaw for a moment. His hands were callused and very large compared to yours "Then we will go with everyone, as always" he sighed. His hand went up a bit and you felt him tug at your earlobe.

"Hey!" you screamed trying to reach for her head to hit her. Sirius dodged it quite skillfully and it made you laugh.

"I think I'll go to my room. See you tomorrow?" he murmured with a tight-lipped smile as he rose from the couch.

"Sure, see you tomorrow" you replied in the same way, watching him walk towards the exit. You released your contained breath and let your head fall against the back of the chair, processing what had just happened.

You were very sure of what Sirius had tried to do and you didn’t understand the reason for your reaction. I mean, you had completely paralyzed shortly after blatantly flirting with the boy. You had had many dates in your life, why would this be any different?

You looked down the hall where Sirius had gone and remembered his disappointed fase. Should you go look for him?

No, maybe it was best to just let it go and gradually he would forget about it. Yes, that would be the best.

You looked at the seat where he had previously been and you also touched your cheek, hoping you could relive the touch that he had given you. For a few seconds you felt guilty that you responded so rudely to his request, but then you simply shook your head to drive those thoughts away.

"I should be sleeping" you thought aloud. You weren't even sleepy and it wasn't even too late, but you imagined it would be easier to lie down on the bed and not think about it anymore.

You took your things in silence and climbed the stone stairs, leaving behind that memory that you hoped would soon be forgotten.

It had been a few days since that incident and luckily things hadn't changed at all between you and Sirius. He really seemed to have forgotten what happened, so the weekend trip to Hogsmeade unfolded in the most normal way in the world.

Sirius was still flirtatious as ever, teasing you and taking every opportunity to be close to you. You liked his company, he made you feel quite calm and you always had something to talk about. If it wasn't this, it was that, and when you weren't talking you were laughing.

"How could you not fall asleep in Slughorn's class?" James asked. His head hung from the ledge where he was lying and played with his glasses. "The only thing that could distract me was Snivellus's voice."

"Don't call him that," Lily said in a stern voice and you snorted.

“Why do you defend him so much? " you asked wrinkling your nose. Lily looked at you just as seriously.

"Because he’s my friend and he does not deserve to be mistreated like that"

"Mistreat?" you asked incredulously “Have you heard him mocking us along with his entourage of snooty Slytherins? Who you should take care of should be that Lucius and Regulus" you said rolling your eyes "No offense, Sirius" you added. The boy was leaning against the wall with his tie unbuttoned resting on his shoulders.

"It's not offensive, it's the truth" he murmured amused, shrugging and giving you a smile.

Lily didn't say anything else, but she seemed annoyed and she didn't speak for the rest of the afternoon. Peter and James started arguing about things you weren't really interested in so you decided to focus on the scribbles you were drawing on a worn parchment.

You felt an extra pressure next to you on the couch and it wasn't even necessary to look to know who he was.

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing" you said simply, keeping your eyes on your scroll.

"Can I talk to you?"

"You are doing it" you replied with a smile. Sirius rolled his eyes and took the quill from your hand, forcing you to look at him.

"Can I talk to you alone?" he asked seriously. Oh no, trouble again...

"Why alone, dear?" you said as a joke. Sirius was too close to you and you tried not to get flustered by it "Is there something you need to say to me that others can't hear?" you asked with a tight-lipped smile, the kind you wear when you're uncomfortable with something.

Sirius cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck unconsciously. You knew he did that when he was nervous.

"Well... to tell the truth something like that" he murmured with a smile. You felt your heart beat faster "Do you think we can go to my room?" he asked.

"To your room?" you said, your voice an octave higher than normal.

"Yeah, you've been there a thousand times," he laughed.

"Eh, is what you have to tell me very urgent?" you asked. You were a bundle of nerves and you really didn't understand what it was.

"Yeah boo, it's important," he said gently. His hand traveled to yours and took your fingers against his. You turned pale because he didn't say urgent but important.

“So, uh, come on. The faster the better, right?" you expressed nervous. You got up from your place and walked to the bedrooms without looking back. You heard an almost deathly silence in the common room and then laughter, but you didn't have time to look when Sirius was already shoving you from the lower back.

The walk to his room was very silent, the first omen that something bad was about to happen. Once you were in his bedroom he let you in first and closed the door behind you, managing to startle you with the simple sound of the latch.

"Why are you closing the door?" you asked nervously, with the volume of your voice considerably louder. Sirius noticed this and quickly removed the latch he had placed on the door.

"I just didn't want to be bothered, that's all," he said with a frown "You're a bit strange, are you sure you don't mind being here with me?"

"No, no, nothing like that" you rushed to reply, waving your hands in an exaggerated way. Sirius found it cute when you did that "You're the one who's suddenly strange, I'm not"

"Yeah, maybe I've been behaving a little weird lately" he smiled, in that way that reminded you of a child "But I promise you it's for good reason, in fact it's what I want to talk to you about" he started to say.

You panicked, total panic screaming at you to get out of there at all costs. The look Sirius gave you, the nervous posture of him and the way he was smiling at you. You knew what that was.

"McGonagall!" You screamed out of nowhere before he could continue

"Excuse me?"

“I forgot that I have a very important meeting with McGonagall, to see the matter of one of my grades. It is essential that I go today and I forgot, can we have this talk later? " you said clasping your hands in a sign of prayer.

Sirius looked, for the second time, disappointed.

"Sure, school is more important," he replied, trying not to sound affected. You grinned widely and walked in the direction of the exit, eager to leave his room.

"Thank you Sirius, you are an angel"

"I know I look like one, but I'm not quite sure I am," he joked, but his smile was not as bright as before. You laughed in response and stood on the balls of his feet to place a kiss on his cheek.

"See you later, I promise," you murmured hastily, leaving without giving him a chance to say anything else.

"Yes... I can wait" Sirius spoke to himself, with a hurt tone. He released his breath and lay down on his respective bed, staring at the ceiling. He felt something strange in his chest, something that wanted him to cry out.

You walked down the hallways, desperate to get away from the questions he might have asked, and when you were outside your common room you didn't stop. On the contrary, you ran and ran through the corridors hoping that no one would find you.

You didn't stop until you were outside the castle, until you were on the same black lake. And once there, you collapsed to cry.

You entered through the portrait of the fat lady, making sure to remove your shoes first so as not to make noise when entering. It was late and you had spent all day wandering the castle only to never return to your common room, wearing James's cloak so as not to be discovered.

It had been a few other days since you spoke to him and you still didn't feel ready to face him. Especially when, that afternoon, you had come to your room totally agitated and your two companions had bombarded you with questions.

Did he already tell you? they asked. What was he supposed to say? What was that important thing that Sirius was going to do that you had avoided?

The worst thing was that you already knew, that was the reason for your flight. Your mind knew what was going to happen and refused to accept it.

But you had also wanted it, you had been waiting for that question for years and now you were simply hiding from everyone so you wouldn't have to face that change.

"I was wondering where you were," said a voice in the dark, making you jump instead. The fireplace was off and the darkness did not allow you to see well who it was, but it was not necessary because you recognized his words perfectly “Well, I was not wondering where because I have this wonderful map to which we all owe a lot, but I was wondering why” he murmured showing you 'The Marauder's Map'. It was night, you couldn't move anywhere anymore and you knew that sooner or later that moment had to come. Still in the dark you saw the silhouette of him get up from the couch and walk in your direction "Are you avoiding me?"

"Sirius..."

"Of course you're avoiding me," he answered himself. The boy took a step towards you and your reaction was to walk two steps back. Sirius stifled a laugh “That's what I refer. Whenever you seem to move towards me and I get closer, you move further away" he muttered. You thought that maybe he was not only referring to the literal part of the sentence “I don't blame you, but I sincerely wonder why you do it. I am a very curious boy” he expressed somewhat ironic. His words hurt because you knew you couldn't give him an explanation "And you're very smart, I'd say too much, and I'm sure you knew my intentions from the moment I asked to speak to you, right?" he continued. He took another step towards you, you stepped back "Do you not like me? You can say no and I will never blame you, but I would have preferred a no sincere to the uncertainty in which I find myself” he explained. Another step, another step "Won't you say anything?" he asked without losing his temper. You were surprised by how calmly he could react to all situations when you were struggling to stay on your feet.

"Sirius, it's not what it seems" you tried to justify yourself. But the man said nothing, because you knew he wanted a more substantial answer than that. You refused to look at him and felt him take another step in your direction, repeating the previous sequence. But this time you felt your back crash against the stone wall and Sirius's arms at your sides, imprisoning you against it.

You looked at his clothes. He was still wearing his uniform but he looked more scruffy and some items were missing. His shirt had a three-quarter sleeve, thanks to the fact that he had picked it up himself.

"Y/N, please" he spoke in a soft voice "I do not ask you to reciprocate, I only ask you to give me an answer"

"I'm terrified Sirius!" you finally said, in a louder voice "I'm completely scared, what else do you want me to tell you?"

"Are you afraid of me?"

"I'm afraid of how you feel about me" you murmured sincerely. Maybe it was time to be honest with him, because you had no other alternative anyway. He had cornered you to it, literally “It scares me that things will change between us, okay? And I like you too, I like you a lot, but I'm afraid of what might happen next" you whispered without looking at him. The heat that emanated from his body hugged you “I like you to tell me all those compliments, even if I say otherwise. I like when you touch our hands, I like that we escape together from class, that when we walk around the outside of the castle you cut flowers to put in my hair, I like to see you every day and I like the cute nicknames you call me with. I like everything about you, Sirius. And that's why I'm so scared of losing you" you exclaimed with a cracking voice. Sirius kept a pious gaze on you. You could feel a bit of his accelerated breath "I've had a lot of good people in my life who have ended up leaving, I don't want that to happen with you..."

"And how will you know if we don't try, love?" he spoke. His voice came out hoarse and with his hand he gently took you by the chin to force you to see him "You could have told me this before and I would have stopped insisting, or we would have discussed it as we are doing now" you looked at him, eyes clouded with tears restrained, and Sirius smiled at you tenderly "I'm not going to force you to do anything, I never would and I never will. But I would... I would like to have something with you. I really like you and if you don't agree I will respect it, but it would be a dream come true to be able to form a relationship "

"Sirius, I don't know how to do it."

"Me neither!" he said, almost excited and managed to make you smile. He carefully wiped the tears that fell from your cheeks. “We could learn together and I promise you that if it doesn't work, I won't let you. If we are not a good couple then we will be friends again and problem solved. But how about we realize that we are ideal for each other? " he muttered. His thumb left slow and delicate caresses on your face “I don't know how to love either, nobody in my family knows how to do it and that's why I never learned to do it. But… being here at Hogwarts I knew what it was like to have friends, to have friends. I learned that my heart races when I see you and that I also like all those things you do for me. I like you to know what my favorite sweets are and buy them for me, I like it when you detangle my hair, when you force me to study, even if I don't like it, because you care about me. When you know that I am sad and you do everything to cheer me up, even when you call me in horrible ways and make fun of me" he laughed, making you smile too "And if you give me the opportunity I know that I can make you very happy and I would also be very happy to be with you. I planned for many days how to say these words to you, but I think now I speak from the heart when I tell you that I like you like no one else has. I'll take care of you, I promise. And I already told you that if this doesn't work, and you decide that way, we will continue to be friends” he concluded. In his eyes you could see that he was also nervous, that he had the same fear as you but that he was better hiding it "Now, if you want me to list the many advantages that I would have as a boyfriend, then doing it" he continued, with a more naughty tone "Don't pay too much attention to me, but I give some excellent kisses..."

"According to whom?"

"According to me!" he said obvious “If you want to check it I am totally available. I mean, just so you know I'm not a liar," he muttered innocently, making you smile from ear to ear.

"Are you sure about this Sirius?"

"From my kisses? Of course"

"About us, you great idiot," you said rolling your eyes and gently pulling a loose lock of his long hair.

"Ouch! If you are going to insult me ​​and pull my hair like that I would prefer that we were in a more private place, my dear” he murmured flirtatiously, putting one of his hands on your waist and closing the distance between you. You looked away but he forced you to look at him again "Of course I'm sure, only if you're sure too" he replied. You sighed, feeling in your stomach a more pleasant emptiness than the previous ones.

"Then ask me"

"What do you want I ask you?"

"What were you planning to ask for days, silly" you said rolling your eyes. Sirius smirked.

"Can you let me copy your Potions project?" he said pretending to be confused and you tried to free yourself from his grip due to lack of seriousness, but he did not allow it. He took you from behind him, putting his arm around your lower back so that his torsos collided and the space between his faces was minimal. You had to lift your head to watch him, but he also looked down to save you a bit of work. His smile faded, but despite the darkness in his eyes you could glimpse a sample of the love he professed for you "Would you like me to be your boyfriend?" he asked softly.

You would remember that moment all your life, his voice low, his sounding in the middle of the darkness with the question that would start his beautiful love story.

"I wouldn’t like it," you said just as seriously, looking into his eyes with a smile. Your hands went up to the back of his neck and you pulled his face gently to place a kiss on his cheek. He smiled "I would love it"

[cheesybadgers]

BLESS YOU for this post, Maria, I appreciate you speaking up ❤️ I feel like I've been posting into the void about it and it's kind of telling that apart from you, the support I've received has mainly been from people who aren't in the fandom anymore or never were lol.

I've seen stuff cross my dash or in tags lately with others experiencing similar problems, so I guess this is just the way fandom has decided to go. It's sad, it hurts and it's incredibly disappointing, especially when it comes from someone who a) I once got along well with and b) given their experience with writing in and outside of fandom, they should damn well know better. But, this is how they wanted to play it, so here we are 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's been frustrating seeing discussions about the lack of community in fandom and so much navel gazing about why it feels like this and the main conclusions seem to be it's because everyone's just a bit shy or Tumblr isn't very user friendly or Instagram has turned everyone into bots obsessively hitting the like button. Oh boy, do I wish the problem was as innocent as all that 😂

But unfortunately, until writers and readers alike take a hard look at themselves and their own behaviour, nothing is ever going to change. And yes, that includes the cool, popular accounts who reblog all the right things and seem super friendly but their actions 'behind the scenes' involve throwing other creatives under the bus. This happens more often than most would think.

You make an important point about writing from a personal perspective and with authenticity. Obviously, I'm not out here writing autobiographies or anything lol, but a lot of the queer stuff in particular in my writing comes from a deeply personal and vulnerable place. So, when very specific things I've taken great care and historical research to include from a queer POV get yanked out of context and shoehorned into heteronormative stories with no credit or acknowledgement, it feels like a violation and yet another attempt to stamp out a queer voice in a fandom that, let's be honest, isn't remotely as inclusive and progressive as it likes to think it is.

And it's clear when people do this kind of thing they didn't stop and consider the actual human being behind the words and ideas they simply had to take for themselves. And for what? A few extra notes? A foil crown on a clown car of a website where follower numbers are hidden anyway? Congrats on the hollow victory, I guess??

People don't give enough credit to artists who use personal experiences to create art. I mean, it's like being the interlocutor and the receiver at the same time, in addition to sharing a pain/moment that could be the same as someone else's.

I'm incredibly disappointed when so many people talk about plagiarism, especially on this platform. I was recently greeted with information from a much-loved (and appreciated) mutual writer and a friend (@cheesybadgers) who went through this, and what I learned was by far very disappointing for me, because the other person was also someone I had a lot of appreciation and respect for.

I haven't posted my projects for months; some I don't even know if I'm going to. I feel like I've run out of patience with having to be so direct about the subject, and I don't want to be elitist, but even the "simplest" of stories should come from a place of authenticity, which can often be in your real life, your dreams or your desires. It can be smut, meet-cute, dark, angst, etc. There's nothing wrong with that. Now plagiarism... We can agree that it's not that cool.

Write about what you want to read. Create what you want, with the characters you love, because the fun of it all it's to share all of our perspectives.

[cheekygreenty]

Leave Me Lonely p.1 - The Darkling x Reader

Based on Ariana Grande’s song Leave me Lonely ft.Macy Grey. Was supposed to be just one part but I got carried away as per usual 🤓

'Get the General!' Zoya's eyes were borderline frantic but her composure remained the same, the once pristine blue kefta was dirty and ragged and her long luscious hair was disheveled, a piece of it in the way of a small cut on her temple.

'Zoya are you alright?' You were exiting the General's tent when you saw her approach, your body filled with an alarming feeling as you raced to meet her and some other Grisha, The skiff, she was manning a skiff across the Fold not even an hour ago, why is she back?

She ignored your question and continued with her dutifulness, 'The General, this is urgent'

You nodded and ran back, mind whirling with the possibilities of the skiffs return. Zoya was a great Squaller who'd successfully manned many journeys across the Fold so why was she back here, all scratched and bruised.

He was conversing with First Army Lieutenants and Captains when a rough grasp around his arm interrupted the flowing conversation. He squared his shoulders but when he saw your panicked face, he relaxed but only the smallest amount. Not even 10 minutes beforehand you two were involved in a heavy argument and at the feel of his tense muscles beneath his kefta, you guessed he thought you were back for more.

You had a right to come back and throw insults at his face, hell, he was the one who brought out that side of you. A vicious, ruthless, and malevolent side you never knew you had, but you ignored that urge.

-Dangerous Love, you're no good for me darling-

'We have a situation.' You cocked your head in Zoya's direction and waited until his company excused themselves and stood to the side before you let Zoya speak.

'I think we may have a sun-summoner.' She said without any negligible hesitancy. The tent suddenly froze in time. The Grisha held their breath and the otkazat'sya paled as your eyes grew wide. A Sun-Summoner.

'We were 2 markers in and were attacked by volcra, a searing light came out of nowhere, or rather came out of a girl, a first-army soldier.' You could see the lieutenant perk up at the sound of one of his being mentioned but Aleksander's expression hadn't changed since Zoya started talking.

'Bring her to me.'

'A Healer is bringing her now.' As she concluded her statements, she silently moved off to the crowd of other Grisha who'd come back from the skiff journey looking equally as shaken as she did.

You leaned back on the desk for support as you settled the information she'd just given you. This was Zoya, a very, very credible witness who'd just said a Sun-Summoner had been found. A legend come true, a myth that no longer needed debunking.

You looked at him again, this time noticing a flicker of hope in his eyes. He stared right back into your own wide eyes and gave a gentle nod followed by a small squeeze of reassurance to your hand which still held a tight hold on his arm. He kept his back to the entrance but you had a full view of her once the tent flap opened.

She was brought in by two guards in a scuffed First-Army uniform, Whether it was from the volcra or just daily use, you didn't know. She looked slightly sickly but mostly scared, like a wounded animal being hunted by its prey.

'Bring her closer.' You had let go of his arm now, that feeling of surety left you cold as his touch disappeared from yours. The guards brought her forth a bit more, letting her go and stepping back as their General finally turned around.

'Closer.' She took a tiny step forward. The poor girl is petrified.

'Well?'

'Well, what. Sir?' She was on the defense, I don't blame her. He was intimidating even when he wasn't using his powers.

'What are you?'

'Alina Starkov, Assistant Cartographer, Royal Corps of Surveyors.' Her fearful expression suddenly changed into a more devastated one. 'They’re all gone. It’s my fault. That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?'

'Answer the question.' He leaned back against the desk just as you did.

'A mapmaker, sir' It was clear to you that Ms.Starkov had no idea why she was here. She was scared, alone, and being interrogated by the most feared man in all of Ravka. The tent erupted in a peal of laughter but you had no time for such snobbiness.

'Quiet' You ordered and a silence fell over the space once again. There was a time when you wouldn't dare command a tent full of Grisha, but Aleksander had changed you; changed the way all his Grisha looked at you.

'So who actually saw what happened? Zoya? You manned the mainsail.'

Zoya repeated what she told you, and Aleksander asked the girl whether she'd been tested but your ears stopped listening once she'd stated she grew up in Keramzin. You too grew up in Keramzin before you were shipped off to the Little Palace to train and become a skilled Heartrenderer. You knew they tested all the children, so how the hell did she slip through the cracks?

You came back from your thoughts just as Aleksander approached her and subsequently amplified her powers. A beam of light so bright and strong you felt some heat from it pounced from her skin and up through the ceiling.

Everyone looked away from the harsh ray but you couldn't turn away. It was beautiful and magical, the physical embodiment of hope, but short-lived as Aleksander let her go and she fell back with a look of awe. He moved quickly, whispering into Ivan's ear and then moving back to you.

'Accompany them to the Little Palace. Ride on a horse and be on the lookout, and give her your kefta.' You nodded curtly, knowing he only trusted his inner circle with the transport of the Sun-Summoner to Os Alta, and that included you. Alina was dragged out from the tent still in a daze of her own.

Your earlier argument with him vanished from your memory as he leaned down to briefly kiss you on the top of your head, 'Be safe.' And with that, you left to find your horse.

***

The backroads were peaceful and quiet as your horse galloped along the dirt road. You wanted so badly to sit in the carriage and speak to Alina, a fellow child of Keramzin, but you listened to Aleksander's command and served as a lookout for any oncoming dangers. So far it had been all clear, but as you approached a hill, a tree blocking the road caught your attention. You slid off your horse and signaled the coachmen to stop too.

'The road is blocked! Beware!' One of them shouted and then all hell broke loose. Shots came from everywhere and anywhere while your horse, in a frightful spell, escaped the way you came.

You had no clear line of vision as dust and dirt clouds plummed above ground and a bullet scratched your left shoulder, then your leg. Your eyes stung and lungs burned as you tried to get yourself out of direct lines of bullets and bombs, eventually finding a place behind thick trees.

Ivan and Fedyor joined you almost immediately both panting and the latter holding his hand to his chest.

'You're bleeding Y/N, where is your kefta?' Fedyor panicked and lay his other hand on your leg where the blood glistened like a jewel.

'How many are there?' Ivan risked asking, trying to get your mind off of the bleeding wounds. Your hands were up in the air as you listened for heartbeats and your heart dropped to your stomach. Too many.

'At least 15 more.' You looked around the Grisha desperately devising a plan in your head that would bring you all out alive.

'Get to the carriage, protect the girl' You signaled to the three Heartrenderers and Squaller.

'But you're hurt and you cannot fight the-' Ivan was cut off by the darkening of the forest, a classic tell that Aleksander was here. Relief flooded you all. The shadows loomed over you, directing their course to near the carriage and then up ahead to where Alina was.

You waited for him to erupt from behind the trees and help you, but the minutes ticked by and you were still hiding from the skilled Fjerdan fighters without backup. Fedyor looked to you, disappointment and pity clear on his face.

Only momentarily did the fighting cease as bullets carried on their assault. You assumed they would flee from the fear of being in the Darkling's presence, but they hit back twice as hard. In return, you all fought back equally as strong, knocking out bodies left right and center despite your dwindling body.

All throughout the fight, you had one thing on your mind and that was why Aleksander chose to ignore you. Was he still mad from your argument? No that couldn't possibly be why he would leave you to potentially die at the hands of druskelle.

Yes you were a soldier, but no doubt he knew the extents of the Fjerdan army and their skilled fighters. If outnumbered, a Grisha was basically of no use.

-If you're gonna love me and leave me hanging here....-

You understood she was the Sun-Summoner but you were you. You were the person he shared his bed with every night, the person who could calm his stormy mind, and the person who stayed with him through it all even though you hurt more than he loved. It stung like a throbbing wound and snagged at your already dwindling will to keep the relationship alive.

-then I'd rather you leave me lonely-

—————-

Part 2

Taglist

@aleksanderwh0r3 @theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld @0-artemis @exo-1204 @staradorned @bookfrog242 @simp-for-ben-barners @keepdaydreamingbb @acciorudolphx @pansysgirlfriend @pansysgirlfriend @justmesadgirl

[pointnumbersixteen]

In Which I Ramble a Bit about Series 3′s Arc Plot

Might be an unpopular opinion, but am I the only one who found the overall Series 3 plot a bit disappointing? 

Series 1: Alison inherits an awesome ancient house! Unfortunately, it’s falling apart and also haunted (although I consider haunted a bonus, personally). Will Alison and Mike be able to keep it? Or will they give in to the pressures involved and sell up? They’ll give in and try to sell up in the end, but end up stuck keeping it because it’s built on a plague pit and no one else wants it!

Series 2: Alison and Mike have kept the house, but getting it to the point where it can become a profitable hotel is probably out of reach on their own. Will they be able to turn it into a successful wedding venue instead? Yes!

Series 3: Alison has a rando turn up at the door claiming improbably to be her long lost half-sister after seeing her sad story on tv. Various people say from the get-go that she’s probably a con artist. For a collection of fairly contrived reasons, Alison and Mike are prepared to suspend their disbelief, however, even after she refuses a DNA test and presents a sob story of her own about needing money, to the extent of being about to offer her their life savings, until the people haunting her house point out that the only piece of evidence she has is a photo that is pretty obvious photoshop. It turns out she is in fact con artist. Net gain for the season? Zero. 

Not only was the net gain for the season zero, the most likely result was that. The options- as far as I could see them- were:

1) Lucy was Alison’s half-sister but wants nothing from her and they all live happily ever after- which has no dramatic tension whatsoever, and is therefore useless as a series plot. 

2) Lucy was Alison’s half-sister and it turns out she wants her share of the inheritance. As I’m sure Alison and Mike do not have half the value of the Button House estate in cash, they’d have to:

A: Sell up to give her her share, which would be the end of the show. OR...

B: Do some sort of weird house share thing- which has interesting possibilities, almost like adding in a regular antagonist, particularly since it would probably be a tense situation, Lucy might have different ideas of what to do with the house, and also the house is haunted by ghosts Lucy can’t see but Alison can, which could play out in various ways- but would mean adding a new member to the cast and there’s a limit to how much mileage they could get out of it before it just became yet another thread they’d have to add in every time, unless Julian eventually killed her or something, with the hope she did not come back as a ghost. 

3) Lucy was a con artist and they figured it out before getting fleeced by her. AKA what actually happened. 

4) Lucy was a con artist and they figured it out only after getting fleeced by her, which would leave them utterly broke again, which would be demoralizing for everyone (including the viewers, after watching and cheering Alison and Mike on for years), and leave them facing a legal battle as to whether or not they might ever get their money back, which seems a bit like stomping on a kitten. 

3 was the most predictable outcome. My first thought when Fanny pointed out that she was probably a con artist was yes, she was probably a con artist. I even messaged a few people who watched earlier than I did, when I was 2/3rds of the way through the series to confirm that she was a con artist but wasn’t going to fleece them, because if they were gonna get fleeced, I needed to steel myself for it. I didn’t think the Idiots were quite that cruel, but I just had to make sure. I’d have bet money on 3, though. And a plot that has a limited number of outcomes and goes with the most predictable one isn’t incredibly interesting.   

I suppose, to be fair, as I was taught long ago in school, that good essays also include counterpoints, so I should also say that I recognize that this contrived and predictable arc plot did very well to play into servicing the Found Family trope, particularly in episodes 5 and 6, and that was probably the Idiots intention with it, rather than the value of the plot itself, and that someone really into Found Family would probably rephrase my series 3 summary as something like:

Series 3: A long lost sister shows up at kinless Alison’s door after a series of improbable coincidences lead them to each other. Is she for real? Or will Alison realize that the ghosts that inhabit her house are her real family after all?   

I wasn’t into it, though. I didn’t feel like it was a point that was necessary to bring home. It felt like another net gain of zero to me. The ghosts were Alison’s family back in s1e6, when they were doing everything in their power to make sure Alison could keep the house, and in s2 when they all strove half the season to make Claire’s wedding a success, and in the s2 Christmas special, when they rallied around her to provide her with her one Christmas wish- a carol- when Mike’s family refused. That well has hit water; there’s no need to keep digging. We’re already there. I was already there, anyway. It felt like a ‘let’s say the subtext aloud in case anyone missed it’ sort of thing, which I find tiresome. I didn’t need the subtext said aloud.  

Which isn’t to say that I didn’t like Series 3, I did. There were a lot of good things about it. The episode plots got more cohesive, they did interesting and occasionally surprising things with the characters, Humphrey was used as more than a prop and Pat got to go camping, which were two things I’d hoped for for a while,  various people got good character growth, etc. The Bone Plot and the Woodworm Men I feel like were two of their best plots so far (although noticeably neither of them involved Lucy). But I wish the arc plot had moved forward somehow, instead of net gain zero.

(On a side note: 2B was the most interesting potential plot option to me, because it has the most possibilities, but it would also make the show more complicated. It could still play into the found family thing, though, and possibly better, as if the relationship became antagonistic, they could have gone the route of ‘blood doesn’t always equal good family and sometimes the people you meet along the way do instead.’ But again, it would have been the most complicated to implement, as they’d have to carry it long term or find some other way to get rid of her, and I didn’t think it could be managed in five episodes, so I doubted they’d take that option, sadly, and was right.)