#did i portray on Shinobi a bit????? maybe

[electrasev5nwrites]

Ninja Daily: AIC 24

"Please concentrate. I need you to be as precise as possible."

Sakura tried to neaten her posture, but it was already perfect.

"I didn't know she was following me until she spoke." Sasuke was perfectly professional. His hands probably weren't clammy at all. "I couldn't visually follow the movement she made."

"With Sharingan?"

The Sandaime might have been the slightest bit incredulous.

Sasuke's jaw was a little tenser. "Yes, Sandaime-sama. With the Sharingan." He adjusted his footing every so slightly. "The suspect collided with Gaara-san, and then as far as I could tell, both disappeared."

"Indeed." He tapped his fingers on the desk just once. "Please repeat once more her words, with tone and body language as you remember them."

Sasuke dutifully repeated the conversation for the second time, though this time he neglected to mention that she had mussed his hair afterwards. That was a shame, because it was the best part, as far as she was concerned. Was his hair cute that way?

Was the Sandaime making eye contact with someone behind them? Sakura didn't let herself look. After a moment, the feeling that he wasn't paying them full attention fled when his attention came to rest on her. "You have had the most extensive interactions with Uzumaki-san in Wave, Sakura-chan." She shook, a little. "Please give me your honest impressions of her at the time, not those you formed with new information after returning to Konoha."

She took a shaky breath. "I thought she was intelligent, kind, and reliable. I also thought she was frivolous, self-centered, and socially intense."

"Intense?" The Sandaime raised his eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

Sakura remembered the toothy grin that had not fit Aiko-san's image. "At times, she seemed more affectionate to us than was warranted by our brief acquaintance," she said slowly. That wasn't quite it, but she couldn't think of a better way to phrase the oddity that had twinged at her. "Or maybe it was disproportionate investment?" she tried. "She expressed concern for our team's well-being and cohesion that doesn't make sense coming from an unrelated shinobi, and pushed the boundaries of reasonable behavior from the civilian she was portraying."

"Did any particular interaction give you a strong sense that something was unusual?"

She didn't have to think about it long. She'd gone over this in her head more than once, trying to pinpoint anything that would have given away the civilian charade. "The conversations we had the first night," Sakura admitted. "I'm not sure what exactly struck me as so odd. The conversational content was mostly normal- she asked about our families, gave some compliments, and talked about how she knew Tsunami-san." She snuck a glance at Naruto. He was looking forward, at the wall.

"The blatantly odd thing was that she was shocked to see Naruto," Sakura said quietly. She resisted the urge to look at her shoes. "Uzumaki-san dropped her teacup, and then invited him to join us. Not long after, she had a conversation with Tsunami-san in the hallway, addressing her concerns about Naruto's health."

Sasuke shot her a sideways look with a question. He hadn't read her report, and she hadn't mentioned that aloud.

She avoided making eye contact and put her chin up a little higher.

"I thought Uzumaki-san was just a friendly person when she asked us about our lives and families. But Uzumaki-san is related to Naruto. Somehow. So she was almost certainly more interested in Naruto, and being nice to Sasuke and I to obscure her focus," Sakura put forward. "She was trying to gather information about him in specific." She cleared her throat.

That stung, a little. She'd thought… it had felt nice to think that she was someone's favorite. And Uzumaki-san had offered her career advice, not Naruto or Sasuke. That wasn't like Kakashi-sensei at all. She hadn't even seen him since he told her to follow Sasuke during the invasion. Of course, most of the senior jounin were suddenly missing. But she… she didn't think he was dead. Someone would have told her.

Sandaime-sama was already moving on, turning his attention to Naruto. Sakura tore her attention away from her sadness and anxiety and back to the less painful immediate topic.

'Aiko-san didn't care about what I said when I talked about my family. She only asked me questions so that it wouldn't seem odd when she talked to Naruto.'

Of course Aiko-san had asked about family. That would be the reasonable thing to do if she was surprised to see a relative. She had to have recognized him by his features. That probably meant she knew who his parents were? Or that he had a strong Uzumaki resemblance, Sakura decided. Aiko-san hadn't really asked about parents… lack of interest? That strongly fit with the theory that Aiko had recognized Naruto by one or both of his parents.

She stole a glance at her teammate. He did have unconventional features. His coloring was unusual, but it was the shape of his face that was just a bit foreign. Did Aiko-san's face look like his? She strained, but couldn't exactly remember. She needed side by side comparison. If Naruto looked a lot like Aiko-san…

'I probably would have noticed,' Sakura thought dryly. 'I saw them next to each other a lot. So unless Naruto is the only one of the two with distinctive Uzumaki traits, that must mean that it was the parental recognition.'

The really weird thing… if asking about siblings wasn't just idle conversation, then… why would she do that? That only made sense if she thought Naruto should have a sibling, or was invested in knowing if he had one. Or knowing if he knew he had -

Her mouth opened in an O.

She looked up, blinking quickly and trying to catch on to where the conversation had gone. Naruto was still talking to the Sandaime, relating something about his training with Jiraiya and Aiko-san sitting in on it. That was a surprise to her, but it made a sinking kind of sense with the theory she had to get out into the open.

It burst out of her without any decorum. "Aiko-san wanted to know about Naruto's family because-"

"Haruno-san," a voice snapped out, shouting enough to cover her voice. "Do not interrupt your Hokage."

She jerked.

A jounin she'd seen around was giving her a stern look. How long had he been in the office?

Everyone was looking at her. She felt her face flush scarlet with embarrassment at her rudeness, but the shame was fighting with the urgency to share her theory. "But," she tried. "There was – I had a thought." Her voice piped down to nearly nothing.

"It's quite alright, Genma-san." The Sandaime was giving her an intense look. His tone was paternal, but she wasn't soothed. "Sakura-chan is a agitated by events, as we all are." He gave her a smile. "Genma, would you escort her out for a breath of fresh air? I think we could all use a moment. Once you return, I'd like to hear your thought, Sakura-chan."

Meek and embarrassed, she avoided looking at her teammates and allowed the jounin to lead her out. She'd been so disruptive that she'd been removed from the briefing. That was… she was never going to let Ino-pig know that her temper was still so poor.

"Haruno-chan, let's have a walk," the jounin- Genma? Genma-san- said, so gently that it was almost certainly an apology for shouting at her. "Have you ever seen the jounin breakroom?"

'Obviously not! Do I look like a jounin?'

She gave him a smile. "No, sir."

He stuck his hands in his pockets and gave her a grin as he started walking in a way she'd never gone before. It was incredibly goofy. Against her conscious desire, she found her shoulders relaxing a bit.

"You know, I've gotten excited enough to mouth off in a debriefing," he confided. "It happens."

Sakura managed a weak laugh and trotted at his left side. "Naruto does it a lot. I'm sorry. I'm not usually like that."

"I believe it," he said generously. "Hold up, we better be quiet for a while. You don't want to disturb people working in this area." He held open a stairwell door for her, but jogged up the stairs fast enough that he passed her again before he reached the exit. He unlocked it by typing a number string in faster than she could see. The door buzzed and he held it open for her. They passed a desk with two senior shinobi who watched them walk by silently.

'This is definitely not a place where I belong.'

She didn't know if she wanted to slink or to try to look confident. She settled for trying to look a lot less interested in their surroundings than she was. It was hard, when they kept passing doors with names she didn't understand and spiderwebbing seals that she wanted to take a closer look at.

"Most of this belongs to offices you've never heard of," Genma said quietly. "Maybe you'll find yourself in one of them, someday."

Sakura gave him a polite look to hide her doubt. On the jounin floor? She was talented enough to make chuunin, for sure. But jounin? Probably not.

He chuckled, so her thoughts probably hadn't been as hidden as she'd hoped. "Oh, you might be surprised." Genma-san opened a sliding down and sauntered inside. She followed a step behind and pulled the door shut automatically.

The room was noticeably warmer than the hallway. It was actually very comfortable. It had big windows and a ring of soft seating. There were three coffee machines crowded onto the counter space, which was somewhat ominous.

"This is the jounin lounge?" Sakura asked, even though she was pretty sure.

Genma-san plopped down in a puddle of light from a tall window. His adam apple moved as he adjusted the senbon in his mouth- when had he put a weapon in his mouth? Ew. "Yupp," Genma-san verified. He closed his eyes.

He was… a little weirder than she'd thought. Sakura picked a seat reasonably close and sat primly, smoothing her dress over her knees. "It's empty."

Genma-san snorted. "Sure is. It has chairs, too. Anything else that you spot?"

Sakura pursed her lips, because obviously she had been politely prompting for information about why it was empty and how he'd known that. But… well. It was all above her clearance. So he'd probably understood and chosen not to answer, she reasoned.

"What was it, earlier?" Genma-san cracked an eye open to peer at her. He seemed only mildly curious. "What was so interesting you started shouting over the Hokage?"

She winced at that description, but it wasn't wrong. "We know that Uzumaki-san is related to Naruto," Sakura started.

All she got in response was a nod and a sort of 'go on,' wave.

She licked her lips. "Uzumaki-san knew Naruto on sight, which implied it was by resemblance. That could either mean a general clan resemblance, or a resemblance to a specific person, likely a parent. She asked about family casually, but was not interested in pushing for details about parents. That implies that she knew who the parent was, because she would have been trying to establish that person's identity if she was trying to figure out how Naruto was related to her."

Genma-san opened his eyes. He was watching her impassively. Something in her hindbrain twinged a warning that something wasn't right, but she couldn't stop now.

"So she knew Naruto on sight, by his resemblance to a parent." By this point she was talking fast enough that Iruka-sensei would have asked her to calm down. "She asked about siblings- why would she do that? Either she wants to know if he has them, or she suspected or knew that he has at least one sibling. She seemed surprised that he said no- she actually asked that twice."

Sakura took a quick breath. "So she really thought Naruto had a sibling and she was surprised to hear that he didn't. So. That probably means that she has strong reason to think he has a sibling. She could just be wrong. But if she's not wrong? She probably knew details about this person, and they're probably older than Naruto. She wasn't trying to find out if this person existed, she wanted either current details or to find out what Naruto knew about this person. And he knew nothing. That's very odd, if he really has a sibling. Why would she know if he doesn't know?"

Sakura knew her pitch was unpleasantly high but the panic of realization was back again. "Because she's the sibling. That's how they're related. She didn't know about Naruto, so when she met him, she wanted to know if he knew about her."

Sakura stopped, breathing hard. It took her a moment to realize that Genma was giving her only a small, mildly incredulous smile.

"That's…" he shook his head gently. "That's remarkably well-done, Sakura-san." Genma-san pulled the senbon out of his teeth and twirled it.

She looked at him. "You're not surprised," Sakura said. "You… had the same idea? Does the Hokage think so too?"

The Jounin let out a whistle. "Kid, you're going to go places with a brain like that." He crossed an ankle over his thigh. "But where you're not going is back to that office to share your theory."

Sakura stared. "That sounds like you're going to kill me."

Genma-san didn't laugh. "We're investigating the possibility of treason, Haruno-san." His voice was suddenly, painfully weary. "I hope you understand the serious nature of what you've stumbled upon here."

Wait, what? Her thoughts were roaring, but self preservation had finally hopped forward to keep Sakura's face blank. Treason? Aiko-san couldn't be a traitor unless she'd been a shinobi of Konohagakure. And surely they would have recognized her if she had been- she hadn't even changed her name.

'Whatever is going on… it isn't Aiko-san who is in trouble.'

"Yes," Genma-san said. "Consider this your notification that your speculation is classified. Speak to no one, unless the Hokage tells you differently." He sniffed once and stood up. "I think it's about time to go back, don't you?"

'No one?' Sakura wondered, mechanically following. 'Not… tell no one except your jounin-sensei? Did he just… leave that out? Or if Kakashi-sensei not supposed to know about this? Is that why he didn't come to this meeting- they thought he might think the same thing that I did?'

She didn't say a word. But… by the time they reached the Sandaime's secretary to ask approval to enter, Sakura was concentrating on one question:

'I wonder if Naruto could tell me who his parents are. I thought they must be dead. But the Sandaime wouldn't waste his time investigating possible treason from dead people.'

When the door opened, she saw the Sandaime look at Genma-san too quickly for Sasuke and Naruto to catch. Genma-san did… something fast with his right hand that Sakura couldn't see.

She plastered on a smile.

"Are you feeling better?" the Sandaime asked kindly.

Sakura nodded, and slipped into an apologetic bow to hide her face. "Yes, thank you. I'm sorry. Please excuse me."

"It's no trouble." He was making uncomfortably direct eye contact when she lifted her head. "You returned at a good time, Sakura-chan. I was just asking your teammates if they had any questions and concerns?"

Naruto threw his hand up and waved. "The Yondaime!"

"That's a rumor," Sasuke-kun muttered, leaving off the "idiot".

"Kiba said Ino said-" Naruto started arguing. She lost interest. She could ask Ino directly and get better information than Naruto would report.

Sakura pressed her lips together and tried not to be too obvious about looking Naruto over. In profile, he was… kind of cute, she grudgingly admitted. In a girly way. Maybe his nose could be a match to Aiko-san's. Was their eye shape the same? She snapped back to paying attention when Naruto broke semi-dignified reporting posture in order to plant both hands on the Sandaime's desk.

"It's not a rumor that you fought the other Hokage, right old man?" He grinned obnoxiously.

Sakura winced.

Her teammate leaned his weight onto the Hokage's desk and let his feet come off the ground. "That's true, right?" Naruto wiggled his butt. She looked away hastily. God, he was so embarrassing!

"Get down, idiot!" Sasuke-kun hissed. He grabbed Naruto's collar and yanked the team disaster back to his feet. Naruto went with a squawk and immediately tried to jab Sasuke-kun in the gut.

The Sandaime watched the tussle with impassive fondness. "That's true, Naruto," he agreed. He pulled open a drawer and extracted his pipe. "Orochimaru revived past Hokage. However, his control was broken." He lit up his pipe. "Thank you for coming, team 7. I believe the mission desk downstairs has work for you. After that, please report to the hospital for your check-up appointments. You will be getting a full physical, with x-rays and bloodwork, so be prepared. Goodbye."

All three genin saluted on reflex. Sakura was halfway out the door before she realized that the Sandaime hadn't answered Naruto's question.

She woke up. Aiko moved slowly, smoothing down the futon cover again and again with her palms to get the wrinkles out. She stood and grimaced at the taste in her mouth. Mission number one was to brush her teeth. The toothbrush was- where had she left the damn thing? It wasn't in the cup to the right of her sink, it wasn't sitting on the rim, it wasn't-

"This is just sad," Sanbi commented. "You must plan better if you will attempt this lifestyle."

He was right. Aiko flinched and fed her own restored chakra to the Rinnegan. Her purple toothbrush innocently looked back at her from where it was balanced on top of her face wash.

"Why did I do that?" Aiko frowned and tried not to make eye contact with her reflection as she cleaned her mouth. "That's a stupid place to put a toothbrush."

"I usually do my best not to wonder," Sanbi said contemplatively. "Last week, you left it on top of the clothes washer. Also, the lid to the nori that you misplaced last night? It is actually under the sofa."

That didn't sound right, but she didn't remember well enough to argue. Aiko caught her mirror self's creepy eye and frowned automatically. When she spat out the foam, she conscientiously put the toothbrush into the cup where it was supposed to live. "Stay," she muttered.

When she made her bleary way out to the kitchen, Aiko paused. It was weird to see someone else there. "Good morning," she decided. "How was your night?"

Gaara didn't look at her directly. In the clear light of day, the stains and wrinkles on his clothes were apparent, as was the sallow quality of his skin.

'Has anyone taught this child about hygiene?' Aiko wondered. 'He doesn't seem to take care of himself well.'

He needed to be outfitted. She should delegate it- but he was her kid. She needed to take care of him.

She ruffled his hair as she walked past- or she tried to, anyway. She scraped her fingers on a cloud of sand.

She checked Gaara's face. He seemed more resigned than wary or standoffish… She didn't think he'd been the one to push her away. So Aiko raised an eyebrow and slowly, deliberately reached past the slowly churning resistance to run her fingers through his rough hair. Two guesses as to what the grainy texture at the base of the strands was- "You need a bath, little one." She stepped directly in front of him and pulled her hands back to herself. She made a note to wash her hands- there were old, spare bis of people in that sand. Gross.

'I wonder if I can get him clean sand. Can sand be washed? His sand should be washed.'

Gaara was watching her with slightly narrowed eyes, but he didn't seem to outright reject the idea of a bath.

"After we eat breakfast, I would like for you to shower and borrow some of my clothes. Once you're out, we can go shopping for your personal effects and have what you're wearing now washed." She waited for a response.

He opened his mouth after a protracted silence. "Fine."

'Oh my god, he's talking to me.'

She beamed at him. That was the first word of the day, and it was a good one.

"You are alarming that child."

Aiko toned her grin down to something more dignified and turned to scavenge for breakfast. She filled the rice cooker halfway and turned it on- oh, that was going to take a while… The fridge held 5 eggs, some more cabbage and onion, soy sauce, mirin… Milk. Not much else.

Well then. They were going to eat scrambled eggs with chopped onion and cabbage on top of rice. And then she was going to find more vegetables, because he needed to get on a healthy diet.

Which reminded her…

'I need to contact Konoha and politely remind them that I expect the accommodations for my puppies to include age appropriate amounts and variety of nutrients. None of that gruel bullshit. I'm not doing that to their people.'

Sanbi sighed.

"Breakfast is going to take a while. Let's go find something you can borrow, okay?" Aiko didn't wait for a response. It was enough to know that he followed her to her bedroom and stood in the doorway while she dug through the cheap plastic drawer set in her closet. She scavenged two long-sleeved t shirts. Neither of them really seemed like his style- they were both slightly stretchy material. One was red, the other dark blue. As for pants- The only thing that seemed remotely plausible was a pair of the dark gray uniform pants. They might even be fine- it was the smallest size available. They were a little long on her, but all her height was through the torso. So…. Probably okay?

She held the options up for his perusal. "Can you stand to wear this for a few hours?" She held eye contact until he shrugged.

That was probably the best answer she was going to get, so she shepherded him into the bathroom. "Gaara, please use my shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. Oh, a clean washcloth, just a second…" She pulled her loofah out of the shower and tossed it in the sink. She found a threadbare pink washcloth in the second drawer, which would do. She held it out until Gaara unfolded his arms to take it from her.

His brow was furrowed.

'Does… He does know how to take a shower, right?' Aiko hovered a moment, unsure. 'He is nearly a feral kid. And from a city with severe water use restrictions. It's… it's pretty possible that he's never used a shower.'

Well then. She stepped into the shower area and glanced back to make sure she had his attention. "This dial adjusts the temperature. I have it at a heat I like, but you can move it to anything. I'll start the water-" she did just that. A gentle rumbling echoed out of the pipes. She took the showerhead off of the hook and angled it to show him the green button underneath. "When you want the water to spray, press this button to turn it on. Press it again to turn it off. When you're done, you can turn all the water off with this lever. If you don't remember, just leave it and I'll get it."

That… That felt pretty through. Could there be something else?

Um. Towels. She only had two, and one was still damp from her shower before bed. So she pulled the other off the rack and draped it within reach of the shower. "You can use this." Aiko pursed her lips. "I'll be in the front room, taking care of morning mail, breakfast, and starting a list of supplies we need for the house. If you think of anything, you can add it to the list once you're done. Please take your time- the rice won't be ready for 40 minutes anyway." She hovered, but that was it. Aiko ran a hand through her hair. "I'll see you when you're done."

Gaara took a slightly appalling hour in the shower, judging from when the water started to when it cut off, but she wasn't entirely certain he had actually taken a shower until he padded around the corner with soggy hair, wearing both of her shirts at once. They were soaked around the neckline.

She did not sigh. She got up, found a big, soft kitchen towel, and gestured him into the tiled room. He came, frowning slightly.

"I want to dry your hair, okay?"

Gaara looked as though he was considering commenting, but settled for a nod. It was just like when she'd hugged him: he started off stiff and aloof, and relaxed in bits and pieces until he was actually leaning his head back into the towel. It was with slight regret that Aiko finished and pulled the cloth away.

She managed to get him fed and tug him out the door within fifteen minutes. The workday was starting around them- genin and chuunin were reporting to the missions office, and scattered civilians were taking their bleary-eyed walks to the fishing docks or construction sites.

'The stores are not open at this hour.'

Aiko felt slightly stupid.

"It's earlier than I realized," Aiko eventually admitted.

Gaara probably thought that his reaction was subtle, but even in her peripheral she saw him steal a quick glance at her.

"Let's go to my office. It's still closer to the shopping areas, anyway."

When she walked in, chuunin scattered. Saito was presiding over the office staff as they began hauling the day's mission scrolls to the front desk. She gave Aiko only the briefest of glances, but a coltish genin hauling the enormous master binder of staff looked incredibly alarmed to see her.

'You'd think it would not be a surprise that the Mizukage is occasionally in the Mizukage's office.'

Sanbi huffed. "Very occasionally, as it were."

Dickhead. She had other things going on, alright?

She pressed her lips together sourly and walked past. The clock in her office claimed it was 6:34. When a frightfully thin genin with light brown hair brought in a tray with coffee at 6:39, Aiko was reading details on the construction report for the repaired bridge. She tried to make eye contact and smile, but the boy ducked his head and set the coffee on her desk as far from her as possible.

Gaara watched this happen, perfectly still on the straight-backed chair across from her desk.

Aiko resisted the urge to sigh. "Thank you," she said. "I need a few things. First off, let's add a cup of tea to my morning order whenever Gaara-kun comes with me to the office. Secondly, tell Saito-san that I'd like to locate a couch and a short table for the back wall, as soon as is reasonably possible. And when Mira-san comes in, she should have a list of medical personnel in the village. I want that list fleshed out with contact information and someone to guide me to each address on the list. I want to tour every clinic and hospital today, preferably before 3pm."

He repeated the orders silently back, mouth moving.

That was… well. A bit unusual, but okay. Aiko waited patiently.

The genin blinked rapidly and then nodded. "Yes." He tapped his fingers against the now-empty tray he'd brought her coffee on. 3 taps, 5 taps, 3 taps, and then he forcibly stilled his fingers. "Will that be all?"

"Yes." She managed a smile, because she was starting to suspect that his ticks had nothing to do with her. "Goodbye."

He left without further comment, which was oddly funny for a reason she couldn't put it in words.

Aiko shook it off and went back to her reading. Gaara had initially turned down all offers of entertainment, but after about an hour he drifted to look at the bookshelves on the wall. When she set down the last invoices for the dock materials, he was a good twenty pages into a book of Kirigakure's political history.

'I need to read that one,' Aiko remembered, slightly guiltily. She knew what Konohagakure cared to teach, but it probably wasn't the same or as detailed.

Ah well. It was nice to see the tension off of Gaara's face. He seemed more peaceful than she'd ever seen, with a boring book and the second teapot of the day set by his side.

He looked up and caught her smiling at him. Gaara frowned instinctively. But after a moment, he seemed to deliberately wipe the negativity off of his features and give her a nod.

She nodded back and then pulled out Mifune's letters again to reread them and implant the details into her memory. Then she drafted a letter to Konohagakure.

At 9, she took Gaara out for the basic supplies of clothes and toiletries and groceries. He was completely disinterested. She gave up on getting his approval for most things and simply picked out a combination of the practical and the whimsical. He didn't seem to have any interest in decorating his room, but it was just too bleak to leave without anything personal. It might have been too ambitious, but she had a small bookshelf and a miniature table added to the huge order to be brought to the house and assembled while she was at work. Hopefully he would find something he wanted to put on them… But just in case he didn't, she picked out a few potted plants of various sizes.

In mid-morning and the early afternoon, she spent her time touring small clinics and checked in on the main hospital. She took her masterlist of persons and places with her and made notes of impressions and facts after each encounter. She left swirling eddies of terrified and confused medical workers in her wake, but that couldn't really be helped. It was going to take time for the general populace to feel safe around a Mizukage. In the meantime, she had work to do.

They needed everything, frankly. They needed more doctors and nurses, they needed better training, more and better medicine, more and better facilities and equipment. The project would have to be approached in starts and stops, but it had to be started.

She called in the man whose half-remembered name started with "Yama" and had a meeting about the contents she needed him to draft in proposals and letters to Mifune. Gaara watched on with surprising engagement for a 12-year old. Granted, he was a 12 year old who would have become Kazekage by 14 in another world, so maybe she ought to be making a concerted effort towards furthering his education with the assumption that he had political ambitions. The meeting ended at 3, at which point she took the time for a good, long stretch and surreptitiously found out that her assistant's full name was 'Yamagi'.

'After lunch, I need to make a chart of my administrative personnel and make sure I know who is reporting to whom, so I can make any changes necessary and keep bad combinations apart.'

Oh. After lunch, huh. That should have been hours ago.

"I'm hungry," Aiko said, in a tone of realization. Had she… She looked at her ward guiltily. "Gaara, I forgot to feed you. Are you hungry?"

He gave her his full attention. "I am not a cat."

Well, yeah. She was aware of that. Cats could feed themselves.

'It's time for a break.'

Aiko stood up and laced her fingers over her head, reaching as far up as she could reach. She felt the stretch down her sides and shoulderblades. "Let's take the afternoon," she said. "A late lunch, and some kind of outing. There's a library I want to visit, and we could see a park, museum, go for a run or do some training- what do you like?"

Gaara just looked at her, as thought he had no idea what to do with this question.

She swallowed. "I'll pick lunch, and you can think on that while we eat." She crossed the room to pull open the door and call for her secretary. Mira-san came instead, holding what must be the finalized copies of mission reports from the first shift, ready for her notarization and pending filing.

Aiko felt oddly guilty for saying it, but- "I'll be out of the office for several hours. I'll return between 6 and 7."

"You have a meeting with Terumi-san at 6:30," Mira said sternly.

She gave the older woman a look, raising her left eyebrow. "I'm aware," Aiko said simply. She held out a hand. After a moment, Mira passed over the binder. "Thank you. That will be all."

She locked up the office from inside. Gaara watched, apparently disinterested. When she held out her hand to him, however, he grabbed it with enough force to turn her fingers white and that somehow turned into something that was almost a hug. Aiko smoothed down his hair with her free hand and did not comment on the desperate force with which he pressed his head into her collarbones. She had meant to hiraishin them away quickly, but she ended up just holding him until he started to lean his head away.

Aiko took them to Grass.

Gaara stepped away quickly in the sunshine, but he didn't pull his hand free. So she kept hold of it. They walked down the city streets of an area she was only passingly familiar with until they found a cafe that looked half-decent. Aiko picked a soup, salad, and sandwich meal with coffee, but Gaara seemed more comfortable with more traditional, home-styled offerings. He ate all his tsukemono- he liked sour and bitter flavors, then?- and the soup and broiled fish, but he left a good portion of his rice.

The libraries in Grass's civilian capital were impressive stone buildings, haughty and dark against the skyline. Gaara drifted along behind her while she collected a few things from the architectural college's library, one tome from the medical college's building, and then finally perked up when she went to the general library. She glanced down at him, fussing with the canvas strap of her bag. It was digging into her shoulder from the weight of the books inside, but she could fit a few more things.

"Anything you want," Aiko promised lightly. "I'll be at that table reading. Why don't you have a look around? Pick at least one book out. You can take more, but I'll be coming back next week. So you can always get something else then."

True to her word, she set to reading in the enforced quiet of the public areas and let him explore without her hovering or guiding. He didn't go far, which was a little saddening, but it did make it easier to keep an eye on him until she got too immersed into what she was reading about foundations and frames.

'I should have listened to Yamato more,' she regretted. 'Over the years, he's told me a lot offhand. I wouldn't be starting off with so little understanding if I'd paid attention.'

She definitely couldn't ask him now- not about architecture in general, and certainly not for clues about how to improve and use her Mokuton. Obito had been right that she could use it, and with a lot more stamina than Yamato. But her control was just sad. She needed a lot of practice, and she needed a lot more understanding of what she should be trying to do.

Pursuing it as a side project was the best solution. Using Mokuton would drastically increase speed and decrease costs associated with importing materials and skilled labor. There was minimal danger in commissioning Yamato for many of the building projects. But some things were in areas where he couldn't be trusted, or would need to have secret floor plans, and definitely couldn't afford to have any of the deliberate weakness that he might be tempted to plant.

She knew Yamato. He was not going to rig an orphanage or footbridge to fall. But he would sabotage government buildings, and bring back information about important locations of food and water supplies, of electrical lines and other such infrastructural weak points.

Gaara was sitting beside her with a closed book on the table in front of him when she looked up. She checked her watch compulsively- 5:30.

They still had some time, then. She tapped her fingers on the table and smiled at him. "Is there anything you want to do?" She held out her hand for his book, intending to put it with hers.

Gaara put his hand on it and slid it away from her. His bony hand covered the title protectively.

Aiko blinked. "Sorry. I wasn't trying to take your things. I just thought I'd carry it for you."

He looked at her heavy canvas bag and then away. Stubborn baby.

"Let's get you your own book bag," Aiko decided. She stood up and headed for the checkout counter, relieved that he followed. "And then?"

She didn't actually expect him to answer. So it was surprisingly thrilling to hear him say, "What kind of museum?"

They used her forged library card to check out all the books like the criminal she was, found him a dark blue bag in a store meant for the university students, and then used their remaining half an hour in a museum detailing the history of the local castle and the series of clans who had inhabited it. She thought Gaara might actually want to see the castle- she promised him that they would do that when they returned the next week.

There wasn't, like, an official tour or anything. The castle was still inhabited. But they were shinobi, they could break in.

'Or I guess I could request it, as the Mizukage?' she vaguely considered. Probably not. That would complicate things. Sometimes it was better to ask forgiveness than permission. It was best to just be so sneaky that no one would know they'd been by.

Her office was just as she'd left it, but when she unlocked the door, she found a couch in the hallway immediately outside. Aiko poked her head out and looked around- there were some other small additions further down: a table, a vase with flowers, a lamp, some small pillows. Huh. That was good service. When she began hauling items in, Gaara assisted without comment. She was walking backwards with one end of the couch when Mei entered the area. The older woman raised an eyebrow, but she swooped in to help Gaara without comment.

"Good evening, Mizukage-sama," Mei said. "May I be of further assistance?"

Aiko walked past to grab the lamp and set it on the table. Gaara was already putting the pillows on the couch. "No," she said, belatedly. "I don't think so." She paused. "Ah, did you submit a request for refreshments on your way in?"

"No. I will do so immediately. Coffee, and…." Mei let her voice trail off, looking at Gaara implacably.

He looked at Aiko. She nodded, trying to prompt him to speak for himself.

"Water will be fine," he said.

She resisted the urge to tell him he was doing a very good job. He probably wouldn't respond well to that. Instead, she just nodded and dithered for a moment over where she should sit. She'd like to sit with Gaara on the couch, but… that seemed more appropriate for less relaxed times. This was an informal meeting with Mei, but Mei was not her friend.

Aiko sat behind her desk and gestured Gaara to the couch so that Mei could take the seating he'd been haunting all day.

When Mei returned, she expressed no more curiosity about Gaara than she'd demonstrated last night, at their longer discussion at Aiko's home. At first, Aiko noticed Gaara listening intently to their conversation. But it was truly boring stuff- dossiers on possible diplomats, information of Hunter-nin and Black-Ops procedural minutia- and after a while he began alternating between his library book and taking neat, deliberate notes on a pad of office paper. She needed to get him notebooks, then.

After Mei left, Aiko took the piles of paperwork with her to the couch and did her reading and stamping there. Mira-san had gone home, as well as most of the day staff. But one of the skeleton crew waiting for the last mission reports of the day trotted in and out, bearing coffee and water and tea. When asked, they went out and returned with steaming curry for dinner. She and Gaara ate there, as the sun went down and drafts of various letters and proposals were sent in for Aiko's approval at the end of the office day. Before 8, all of her in-going correspondence had been dealt with, reports read, requests for the following day filed, and the changes to her schedule approved. She led Gaara out past the front desk as security came by to lock the building for the night.

It was dark. Like, really dark. The city lights weren't on yet- it hadn't been prioritized. But there were some lanterns burning in attempts to entice customers into the few restaurants open, and ambient noise that kept the city from being too creepily empty.

At home, it was something of a relief to see that the genin team she'd had take her things home had done a nice job with putting away groceries and filling up Gaara's bedroom and adding his toiletries to the bathroom. Someone had even added some things of their own volition- she'd need to find out who was responsible for realizing she was out of floss and replacing it. That was thorough and thoughtful.

'I wonder what dad is doing in Konoha.' She curled up on a cushion in front of the in-ground firepit without lighting it. 'The Sandaime can't possibly trust him yet. Will he reach out to Naruto right away?'

Would Naruto even deal well with that? Would-

"However interesting those troubles, you do not have the leisure time to struggle with them. You have many fascinating problems of your own. Shall I list them?"

'You're a mediocre and mean turtle.'

There wasn't much heat in the insult, because he was right. She needed to remember that she served Kirigakure's people, not Konoha's. She didn't have to be cruel, but she couldn't waste away resources and energy that her people needed.

"Gaara," she managed. She didn't have to look over to know he was paying attention. "Do you have any ideas about what you would like to do? You don't have to do any kind of shinobi work for us- it's probably inadvisable unless you decide you don't want to return to Suna at all. But you should probably be contributing while you're staying here. It sort of looks like nepotism if I have everyone but my kid helping out, you know?"

It took nearly a minute for Gaara to decide to come closer. Aiko reflected that he walked like a cat: near silent, and with an aloofness that said his chosen path had absolutely nothing to do with anyone else who might be in the room.

"Apprentice," he said.

Aiko actually turned to look at him so he could fully appreciate the way she was contorting her face. She didn't know what emotion it was conveying, but it was definitely moving in an interesting way. "I would like clarification."

"I'm going back to Suna." Gaara's lip curled, and teeth peered out. "Eventually."

She waited.

He seemed to think that was enough.

It was not enough. "That's your choice," Aiko said as patiently as she could manage. "Weird, but okay. Who are you apprenticing to and why? Or are you asking for an apprentice?"

"You." The word was spat out, to get it out of the way as quickly as possible. "You're like me, but they listen to you. I need to be able to do that as well. Show me how to make them respect me. I'm the only one Sunagakure has who is strong enough to lead."

She leaned back on her cushion and braced her weight on her palms. "That sounds like the opposite of what I asked for," Aiko countered. "I asked how you might contribute to Kirigakure, you're saying that you want a lot of my time and attention." She shook her head, feeling the weight of her hair swaying behind her. "Make it worth my while, and we can talk."

Gaara crossed his stick-thin, anemic arms, ad tried to look tall. "Kirigakure will benefit from competent leadership in Sunagakure."

"Probably. How can you know you'll be a competent leader?"

He scoffed. "Is it your teaching abilities that you doubt, or my capacity for learning?"

"I doubt a lot of things," Aiko rebuffed. "The time and attention I can dedicate to your education, your emotional capacity to bond with civilians, the likelihood that Sunagakure's citizens are going to react as Kirigakure's have, and yes, my ability to teach you to govern given that I have a style you are not suited to, and I'm making shit up as I go." She paused. "Constantly," Aiko stressed. "I don't know what I'm doing. I can't teach you how to manage a city because I'm still learning. I encounter a problem, I seek out information and attempt to predict future problems and work to preempt them. I can teach you how I think and problem-solve, but I can't teach you how to do that job."

"My current skill-set is killing people," Gaara said flatly. "Whatever you have to teach me can't make me worse."

That was just untrue, but sort of sweet in naivety. "I could teach you about-" Aiko stopped, remembered how young Gaara was, and frowned. "There's a lot I can't teach you about. But fine. I'll consider your proposal with a trial period." She pulled her hands onto her lap and leaned forward. "You work for me, now."

"How long is this trial period?" Gaara asked.

She tilted her jaw up. "As long as it needs to be."

"That's not good enough." He was turning a bit red, pupils dilating in the darkness. "I can't be away from Sunagakure indefinitely, nor can they mistakenly think me a traitor."

They held eye contact. Aiko kept waiting for him to turn away or change expression, to either back down or become aggressive. But he just matched her stare.

She cracked a smile. "Fair enough." She gave him a half-bow. "It's a deal, then. I'll make sure that doesn't happen. I will either accept or reject you as an apprentice within a month."

He took a moment and then bowed uncertainly. "Uzumaki-shishou?" Gaara asked. "Aiko-sama?"

Both of those were weird and markedly more responsible and adult-sounding than she felt, but one was significantly less weird to hear. "Aiko-sama," she confirmed. Ugh. So weird. "We are both going to be learning on our feet, Gaara. Tomorrow I want you to accompany and assist an architectural specialist. I think that your sand could be very useful for his construction project. Demonstrate your abilities, learn from him. I'll expect you in my office at 4pm for a detailed report of his thoughts and what you've understood." She stretched. "I'll have someone take you to him at 8 tomorrow morning. Be ready to take direction."

If she'd told that to Sasuke at that age, she would have gotten a sneer. Naruto? Whining. But Gaara only nodded.

It was a little unnerving. But she went about her night as if she wasn't bothered by the compliance. She answered some letters, sent an updated set of orders to the third border post with a courier, and showered before bed. Even in the hot water, she couldn't relax. Eventually she gave up and wrapped her towel around her body and laid on top of her sheets. The damp towel and her sopping her made her cold and uncomfortable.

"I really should hang this towel up so that it dries," Aiko said to herself. But she couldn't find the energy to move, even to unwrap the towel and push it off the bed. Whatever. She closed her eyes, dreading everything. She let the Rinnegan sleep.

Some of the tenseness in her neck washed away with the sinus pain she hadn't exactly noticed building over the course of the day. She stared bleakly into the darkness for a while. There was a pressure in her chest. It wasn't like something sitting on her body. It was like there was something small and hard pushing outwards inside of her breastbone, trying to open up a space to contain… something. Anything.

It was difficult to muster the give-a-damn to finish getting ready for bed, when her body felt so heavy and tired. Eventually, she contorted enough to reach her fingers along the wall along her head and flip off the lights. It was hard to know how long it took for her to fall asleep.

[littlemeangreen]

Onism

The frustration of being stuck in just one body

@thecorteztwins your favs call me daddy too.

"Oh god, oh god, oh fuck-" Shinobi Shaw swore as he tripped over a table leg. Who put table legs in the hallway? Who put tables in hallways? God, they were so gaudy. But then again, it seemed like a thing for Haven. She was a sweet woman and a total milf but like all rich people, she had obviously never had to furnish her own home before.

But still, for what Haven lacked in moderate taste she made up for in a caring attitude that made most mutants of Krakoa swear that she had some sort of...super mothering powers. Yeah, that seemed like a valid enough thing for Haven.

She was always caring and polite and Shinobi was hard pressed to think of a time where she didn't help any members of the team. Like taking Alice shopping to develop her own style, letting Claudia ramble on about something, being there for Pyro when he either started going off about one of his books or dragged her off to talk in private and letting Madelyne go off on her personal martyr missions because it was "healthy for her".

Hell, she even made an effort with Shinobi's father, Sebastian. Shinobi didn't think that much could happen there, once a lost cause then always a lost cause, right? Still his father hadn't given any hints that he fucked her so Shinobi could admit that a great deal of his love for Haven came because of that fact.

But still, Haven gave almost everything she saw effort and that weirdly enough included the Shaws for god knows why. They were then Kardashians of Krakoa! There was no point for Haven to try and use her feelings to try and get along with his father. You could try to feed a donkey a carrot but you couldn't do it by shoving the carrot up its asshole.

That's why it was odd that she had called him so....late? Early? He had been at a delightful party-turned orgy so he had lost track of the time. He'd gotten told that he had a text right when it had been getting good and now here he was, rushing down a hallway because Haven had texted him in a middle of an orgy because something had happened to his father and no one would tell Shinobi what is was.

It was maddening. Infuriating. Worrying. Shinobi wanted his father to be okay.

Shinobi also wanted to hear that his father was in pain.

"Ah! Shinobi! Forgive me for not passing any details, the situa-" Haven seemed to have been cut off by the look he had given her but really, surely the woman would know not to ramble on after giving such a text!

"Right, yes, sorry. Your father is...okay." Okay? No mutant was ever okay in their lives! "He was on a mission with Fabian-"

Oh fuck. Shinobi imagined that if his father had another son (that Shinobi knew of) and dropped him down a river like Mystique did, it would be Fabian. A disaster of a birth could only make such a wreck of a man years down the line in Shinobi's opinion. But it wasn't like he would actually ever say anything to Cortez. After all, who knew what a mutant with power enhancing skills could do to a man who phased through things. Better to keep his tongue away from Fabian Cortez, both metaphorically and physically. Especially physically.

Wait. Shit. Haven looked like she was done speaking. Had Shinobi glazed through it all? Haven would be perfectly fine with explaining it again but still...did he really want to stand through another long winded and overly detailed talk? Probably not.

"-Trust me, we're going to try and reverse what happned but first we need to just simply wait and find out if..." Haven seemed to stop for a moment, biting her lip and looking away briefly. She fiddled with low hanging necklace riddled with red jewels. Shinobi distantly remembered that red apparently evil comings in Egyptian mythology.

Shinobi sighed and decided that, like all things in life, he would do this head first. After all, he was excellent at head.

"Right....well. Take me to him, I suppose he will be wanting to talk to me." He frowned and waved a hand, trying to come off as aloof. Father had done it many a times and he hoped to think that he had gotten the gesture down to the same titbit.

Haven seemed to account his aloofness for grief and stepped forward, offering her hand and not looking off-put when Shinobi didn't take it. "Of course. Follow me, he- they refused anyone in the room apart from Dr McCoy, Charles, Moira and....Madelyne." Haven winced at that last bit and Shinobi could only imagine what it could mean. Did Sebastian demand that she stay? To keep someone the smallest bit familiar that he could stand? Perhaps he liked it when Madelyne presence could soothe something in him, like a twisted beast disguise as a beauty.

No, that was ridiculous. Shinobi's father could take more comfort from a wrinkled bill rather than any person.

Fabian though? Yeah, that made sense she'd be there.

Shinobi was led through the halls, where he saw the rest off his team waiting about. Alice was leaning against Pyro, frowning as he rambled on about something to make her feel better. That was good of him, Pyro often than not was able to pull through on comfort far more easily than he thought he could. He'd hold on just fine until Dom came over to help him out.

Claudine was leaning against a wall, nodding at Haven after looking up from her phone and rapidly texting. Shinobi didn't want to think about what she would hope to gain from whatever happened to his father.

But what was surprising was the fact that the rest of the Acolytes were standing around near the doorway, Anne Marie being helped by Delgardo, who was passing her a glass of water as the blue haired woman took a sip and cradled her head. Also...Quicksilver was there. Which Shinobi didn't want to think about why other than him being on he mission with Fabian and Sebastian.

All of these people for the worst men on Krakoa...it was astounding honestly. "Are you ready?" The tall woman was weirdly insistent on making sure Shinobi was prepared for something he wasn't even sure about yet. But he liked surprises for the most part, maybe this would be one of them. Or better yet, this whole charade was just some sort of...surprise birthday party. You never knew, he certainly didn't know when his birthday was. Father was never big on celebrating milestones that just reminded him of the disappointment he seeded years ago. Ugh.

Shinobi nodded, adjusting his tie and taking in a deep breath as the door opened up. Whatever this was, he could easily handle it. Contrary to belief, Shinobi was capable of doing tasks for his fa-

Oh.

"Oh." Shinobi said.

"Oh." Haven agreed with a small sigh, covering her mouth at the unfortunate sight.

"Oh." Charles Xavier, sitting by a table in the room, seemed to think that this was the best greeting.

"Oh?" A new voice, deep enough that Shinobi could feel it rumble in his chest, deep enough that it caused he windows to shake gently. The voice belonged to a horror of a nightmare and oh god Shinobi was going to become a nun or whatever the hell meant he could never look at evil again. Because this?? This was evil.

He was big. Like, eight or nine foot big. Fucking stacked with the small pouch of fat that all middle aged people got eventually. There were also stretch marks across his skin and Shinobi wished that he had the decency to either cover himself or to just not wear a shirt at all, with the way that he wore ONLY sleeves that were buttoned above his ridiculously big man boobs, the type of man boobs that only jacked guys or the Blob had and the type that Shinobi prayed every night that he wouldn't get one day. Thank god his pants stayed on, despite how...hugging they were.

His face was chiselled enough, with a shady stubble that definitely make a picture with the brownish-red hair that was currently tied up in a ponytail trailing down his back and Shinobi couldn't help but notice the fact that his eyes were practically glowing blue among a pitch black scelara.

"Shinobi, I HOPE that you aren't going to just STAND there and stare like a FOOL." The same deep rumble was back and with every word that was seemingly emphasised, Shinobi not only heard his father's voice, but also a deep surge of something that made a churning feeling arrive in his chest and stomach. He didn't need to stand around here to know that he didn't like the way that another set of eyes opened up and stared from what was supposed to be Sebastian Shaw and Fabian Cortez's throat and left cheek. He also didn't like how a crunching noise led to another set of arms, just as muscular as the first pair.

Haven seemed to catch on to what he was feeling, she always did. And the kindly woman was quick to carefully place herself between the...two? Three? Of them. Luckily Fabian's liking for Haven seemed to transpire over to Sebastian and the giant's eyes softened as he stared down at her.

Well. Shinobi would feel traumatised over that later. It would give him something to do when he wasn't partying.

"Okay, let's...take a deep breath and...try to think about this. After all," Haven dropped her hands and winced, obviously thinking back to something Shinobi had missed. "We don't want a repeat of what happened to Scott when he tried to get you two to split up..." Shinobi didn't know it now, but he would definitely laugh later when he heard how Scott blasted an eye beam when Fabastian got too rowdy, only for his own lasers to bounce off him and.. seemingly emit from Fabastian's own eyes. Beast and Chrome had suspected that rather than increasing other mutant's powers or absorbing them in force, Fabastian took the power in and replicated it in a more extreme force, rather than a simple absorption like Rogue did.

Fabastian sighed and nodded, turning away to stare out the large windows, his awful back...rippling. ugh. How did someone ripple that much? It was gross and unnatural and ugh, oak trees were skinnier than Fabastian's arms. It was like bear meets bear meets bear with a bear with a steroid problem. "We are absolutely SURE that we can fix it BECAUSE, no one can even BEGIN to be trusted with this!"

Then, as an afterthought and lower to himself, Fabastian added, "And it isn't like any of you will be willing to help me or him or us or what makes this form so brilliant."

Behind them all, Pietro seemed to wince and look away, like be didn't agree with that sentiment. Which was fair, Shinobi didn't like it either so Blues Twinky Clues had a very good point there.

"Um. Okay." Shinobi made the effort to try and ignore the way that his - father? Guy he didn't want at orgies or doing drugs? Or anywhere near him? - Spoke. "So. Um. I think...this is a big problem and Haven is absolutely right when she thinks that this shit is weird and we need to-"

He barely got to finish before large hands were shooting out for him. Haven...she tried to stand in the way again but it seemed that Fabastian's emotions had taken over and large hand roughly shoved her away, causing Haven to slide across the room and into the back of a wall. Funny enough, almost no one noticed the flare of darkness coming across her eyes and spilling out of her mouth as she took the sudden force and was...seemingly okay.

Everyone else though, took it as the motion of "oh fuck they're angry time to fight" and now Shinobi was suddenly surrounded by a room of heroes, villains for hire and whatever Pyro was, as they took the big fight scene poses. Completely ready to get their asses kicked if you asked Shinobi.

After all, no one went up against any part of Sebastian Shaw and came away perfectly fine. He always hurt you in some little way that maybe you won't notice for months until someone sneered or yelled at you in the right way and your stomach would clench and you would start to shake because they were right, he was right about everything when it came to how awful you were but you could never hope to say anything to defend yourself.....ahem. Shinobi was getting ahead of himself there but the point still stood; You never won in a war with Sebastian Shaw, even if you had won the battle of that day.

And maybe someone would think that seeing Haven getting supposedly hurt would make Shinobi be more heroic and actually stand up for her for once. That having everyone in the room, including Anne Marie who normally would never harm a mutant so long as she knew stood on her side, was now staring intently at the awful muscular being and...well, fuck. It was going to be one hell of a showdown and Krakoa would definitely be busy over the next few weeks bringing people back to life. That is, if Fabastian didn't explode on impact, like am oversized balloon.

And maybe you would expect Shinobi himself to start fighting. To finally take a big stand against his dad and the asshole that kept ruining the good parties and orgies.

No.

Instead, Shinobi took a step back, a deeper intake of air that seemed to keep on running away from him. His eyes were wider by the second as Fabastian took a step forward and something pulsed within him that....well, he didn't like thinking about the sudden sharp fear, like he was a deer in headlights. Only that the headlights were an overzealous and violent man who was currently screaming over how; "He KNEW you would all betray him how DARE you ALL!" You know, the scary shit that you tended to hide from when an incredibly creepy guy and your scary parent were getting into that awful mood.

Instead, Shinobi decided that dying again wasn't worth it. And something in him twisted and turned in an ugly manner as the sight of familiar eyes shifting in anger as they took in all of the opponents they would hurt and prove their worth to. He didn't want to die like this and something in Shinobi (the part of him that went "that catch of tequila will fuck you UP" And was usually right) told him that he especially didn't want to die by his father's hand.

It was cowardly. To step back and simply...phase through the floor before Fabastian could touch him. He couldn't deal with this. Not right now. There was nothing funny about the current situation or the anger that was taking hold in a normally coll and collected man. Right now, all Shinobi cared about was getting to safety for himself. Maybe finding Storm because even when he was being awful and flirty, he did admittedly admire how she was seemingly never scared by what she faced.

And besides, he could always laugh at Pietro being punted into Anne Marie out of a window later.

[anti-sasuke]

What would you say is the most egregious misrepresentation of Iruka in x reader fics/hc?

Honestly, recently I've seen quite a few nsfw degradation iruka posts and I think that's so far from his character that it seriously makes me laugh and also a bit uncomfortable. In terms of what pisses me off most though, it's shy, weak uwu soft boi iruka. Nothing upsets me more than seeing hcs and fics about Iruka with a jounin or anbu s/o and he believes himself inferior because of their shinobi status. Like did we watch the same show?

People still seem to have trouble accepting that Iruka is a chuunin sensei by choice, not because he's not strong or smart. And sure some of that is on Kishi for giving us so little but what we got, id say, still speaks volumes if you're paying attention. Put Iruka next to Kakashi and im sure even Iruka would agree Kakashi is better but we've already seen he's not the yessir type just because someone's ranked above him. And I think because he chose to become a sensei and clearly is domestic, people forget he's still a shinobi, still a fighter. He's smart, he's strong willed, he's confident enough in himself to know when he can and can't handle something head on, we've seen this before. He's done multiple A ranked missions, pretty sure multiple official books have mentioned he could go on to be a tokujo or even anbu. Like he's not weak and maybe it bothers me more than it should but I hate when people portray him as so, especially when it's just to make y/n or whatever jonin they're shipping him with look better.

[shammikorn]

hi! i loved your interpretations about rin's character and how much depth it gives her! could you tell us your thoughts (ignore if not!!) about obito, since he's a bit of a debated character and your art features him so well? do you believe he's allowed some kind of redemption, or not, or maybe you reject the post-rin's death obito altogether? in any case i think he's quite a fascinating character within the context of the naruto's horrid shinobi world but i personally don't get his evolution...

hey! thank you very much!

i rarely engage in fandom stuff these days, my only thought about obito at this point is that I Like Him Very Much (i’m lying actually, i have a lot of thoughts about him but you’ll have to be more specific haha). he’s a nice little guy, fun to watch and easy to empatize with as a kid, he’s a fascinating and complicated antagonist later on - a bit cliched in both roles, but none the worse for it. while his fate is grotesque (yet touching), the main foundation for his often gruesome deeds is his love for kakashi and rin, which is tastefully bittersweet. imo obito is one of the best characters in the franchise and one of the few i can enjoy without turning them into literal ocs.

also he is the only one who stands up to kakashi’s bullshit. king❤️

for the redemption thing- i don’t really think he needed any. (i remember literally just crumbs from war arc but) i guess his decision to side with naruto doesn’t sit well with me. kakashi’s speech to obito, dedicated mostly to naruto, doesn’t sit well with me either. obito’s final speech, addressed to, once fucking again, naruto, makes me just mad. narrative portrays the whole idea of the infinite tsukuyomi as evil and like...it’s not? dude i WISH i was trapped in some spooky cocoon living the life of my dreams and slowly and peacefully dying...and even if he did need any futher redemption, what could he possibly do? work for the very state that had lead him to the same actions that he’s supposed to be redeemed for? support naruto’s egocentric agenda? just accept the reality that’d been so absurdly cruel to him he’s convinced it wasn’t real?

aaaand obito from verse where rin isn’t murdered is a very special sort of a treat to both me and him. he should deal with the realization of the nature of his crush(es) on his weird best friend(s), his self-esteem and the burden of being the sweetest yet dumbest guy in the world, not the dead patriarchs fucking up his mind :)

[softnaruto]

Shisui with S/O from our universe and she's a princess. Like how would he react when he finds out and maybe sees a photo of S/O in nice princess gown/dress (like she's from europe so she hasn't really ever wore kimono?) and he goes Uwu☺️ sorry for my english 😅

Shisui with a princess! s/o from another universe! 

author: hi hello! So sorry for the late response! I decided to make this into a headcanon to portray the different aspects best! Hope you like it!

pairings: Shisui x female! s/o

words: 1007

genre: fluffy, cute, au

warnings: none; freaking out

The minute Shisui would even hear about the POSSIBILITY of being in love with a princess—especially a princess who wasn’t from HIS world—he would freak out.

He was going through your stuff as you had just moved in with him, and he came upon one of the photos you had taken right before you had been taken into his world. You were wearing a long, elegant black dress, accompanied by your date as you were attending a prestigious ball. The unfamiliar clothing and background made him extremely confused, and when he flipped the image, he noticed a strange date on it.

He turned to look at you as you left a box in the bedroom, and you raised an eyebrow before noticing the photo. You walked over to him, a nervous smile on your face, ready to make any kind of excuse as to not freak him out.

“Hey babe,” Shisui said, “What is this? A costume party? Also, where did you get this dress? I’ve never seen anything like this. You look so beautiful! You also—”

“Shisui, I have to confess something to you.”

He freaked out. He stumbled a bit, kind of laughing and trying to change the subject, but as you kept explaining your situation, the reality hit him.

I mean, hyperventilating. He would have to sit down for a while, his eyes wide with shock and you’d have to hold him in your arms as he realized he didn’t know anything about his world. Although he is thought of to be an individual with the keenest eye in the Uchiha clan, he really was completely naïve to the outer world.

Your world.

“I’m okay and this happened a while back—”

“Okay but YOU’RE A PRINCESS.”

“Yes, but I like being here now.”

“But you’re rich there.”

You’d just have to let him calm down. Hold him for a while, lay with him, tell him you are not in his world against your will, and that maybe at first you were, but now that you had met him you didn’t want to go back.

Kiss him, make him feel okay with the possibility that... there are other universes out there!!!

Once he understood the situation (or tried to understand), he would ask you a few questions. He was on your chest, your fingers softly running through his short hair.

“Where are you from?”

“A country called Spain. It’s in a continent called Europe.”

“A continent?”

“It’s a… well, let me explain. You know how Konoha is in the Land of Fire? It’s almost the same thing!”

He’d feel a bit slow when understanding the concept, but after seeing how similar both of your worlds were (except with the much more advanced technology that he wishes would exist to stop violence,) he would start asking you about yourself.

In fact, he loved the thought of you as a princess. He had always noticed your elegant nature; you were gentle and soft with everything, even as a shinobi. The way you would hold a kunai, your elegant and well-taken care of fingernails wrapped about the sharp object with such… grace. He had never seen anyone be as agile and as graceful at the same time; not even Shisui was as skilled.

He asked if you could wear a dress for him. He had always seen you in regular attire, as you were not used to wearing such attire back at home and liked wearing regular clothes instead, and you… were open to the idea.

“A kimono would look so beautiful on you, you know,” Shisui said, lifting his head from your chest before looking up at you. “I think you’d look even better than in the photo.”

Your cheeks heated up as a blush spread throughout them, and you shook your head, slightly nervous at the idea.

“I’ve never worn a kimono,” You confessed, “I don’t know if I’d like it, honestly.”

Before you knew it, you were standing before a mirror, wearing a beautiful pink kimono that was layered with beautiful flowers. The kimono felt much nicer than the dresses you were used to and you felt much more comfortable in one.

As a child, you were often forced to stand a certain way, act a certain way, and speak a certain way when you were in a dress, but as you stood in front of Shisui, you felt like a brand-new person. His jaw had dropped, and a blush had crept over his cheeks like a sunset spreading over a beach.

“Y/N—” Shisui began to say, but was quickly left speechless.

“What do you think?” You asked, a small smile on your face.

“You really are perfect.” Shisui walked over to you, planting a soft kiss on your cheek before looking at the lady at the counter. “We’ll take it, please!”

Long after the news of your mysterious origin came out, Shisui has not stopped thinking about you in that elegant dress. He would sometimes take the photograph with him on missions, loving the way the dress hugged your curves, wishing he himself would be able to see you like that one day. Although he didn’t want you to feel alone as your family and friends were in another universe, he was happy that you were content with just him.

He needed you too.

Sometimes you would talk in your native language, Spanish, and he would often fall asleep as you’d whisper in his ear how much you loved him. He couldn’t understand, but one day, he would. He’d try to learn about your culture and your way of life before and would try to make you feel more at home.

Shisui is all about making his love and appreciation for both you and your culture obvious. He doesn’t want you to go back, which is the only selfish trait that he has in his body.

The most important part is that his princess was really a princess, after all.

[secret-engima]

Some Random Reasons I Really Like the Boruto Anime.

(because yes it has it’s problems but honestly I’m tired of trying to enjoy my fandoms with everyone whinging that it’s “not as good as the original”. As if the original two Naruto shows weren’t utter dumpster fires with moments of Pure Awesome to keep it alive and half the fandom isn’t there solely to pick through Kishimoto’s junkyard world building looking for shiny bits to incorporate in their fanfics.  Which is not to say I don’t like the Naruto shows, but seriously ppl you can’t whine about how bad the fillers and slow pacing and weird world-building of Naruto was only to turn around and scream that Boruto is horrible of TRYING TO BE DIFFERENT. Let’s inject some positivity in here. Anyone who has no need for Boruto positivity can kindly move on with their lives and let me have my shiny fandom. Moving on.)

-Reason 1. Mitsuki exists. He is Best Boi™ and I adore him.

-Reason 2. The characters are not carbon copies of their parents, but neither are they polar opposites. They have some of their parent’s traits and some of their own unique traits and honestly it’s so refreshing to have a show that isn’t “Main Character X Take 2: This time with a New Color Scheme”

-Reason 3. Have you SEEN how many girl characters there are in this show? Even if most of them are side characters? Have you SEEN the fact they can actually DO STUFF other than flip their hair and whine about boys? One of them can use seals! And has CAT POWERS!! Another one was the antagonist of the first story arc! And was actually cool! And also got reformed rather than just being yote off the nearest cliff! The main female character is actually useful without being either a whim or a jerk!

Reason 4. The school system has been revamped in ways that make SENSE. The Naruto cast (especially Iruka as the new headmaster) looked back on their early life and went “You know what? It’s REALLY DUMB that we were so unprepared for shinobi life. Let’s change that.” And they did! Students actually learn water and tree walking BEFORE they get thrown into life and death situations! They know jutsu other than the Basic Three! They get to know basic sealing and learn that Summoning jutsu exists! There’s a student who knows medical ninjutsu, so that’s obviously an optional course or something kids can take! They also have an option to NOT BE NINJAS. If they decide partway through they don’t wanna be ninja’s, there’s a civilian middle school program incorporated into the academy! Do you know what that also means? Civilians who get to know BASIC SELF DEFENSE. So even if they aren’t Ninja, they at least know how ninja work and how to not Insta-die the next time someone breaks into their village!

Reason 5. THERE’S AN INTER-SCHOOL TRANSFER PROGRAM. Way to show just how tight the alliances of the different villages are. Even if it’s only mentioned here and there, it’s SUCH a cool thought with so much fanfic potential.

Reason 6. Chocho, flipping, Akimichi exists. Yes, she can be a little annoying with her running gag of “I’m so pretty” but like- SHE IS ACTUALLY PRETTY. And she knows and can use the clan jutsu really well! DO YOU KNOW HOW EASY IT WOULD HAVE BEEN for them to either make her utterly hideous and go “Hur hur look at the fat girl thinks she can actually be pretty lol” OR make her constantly whimpy and shy and lacking any confidence at all because “oh look at the poor girl, she’s FAT so she must feel UGLY all the time, and have no confidence because what FAT PERSON has any confidence unless they’re delusional?” Both of those would be so freaking stupid and defeating. But INSTEAD they make Choho 1. pretty and 2. self-confident. She dresses nice, she looks nice, she’s not stick thin like say, Sarada, but she is actually pretty and she OWNS it. She owns her love of food, and her clan jutsu, and just- herself in general. And yea they use it as a running gag sometimes when she plays it up a little too much, but like- there’s a body positivity character! Right there! Who is also a girl who kicks butt! One of the biggest complaints I’ve seen of the naruto show is that the girl characters are flat and useless and underused save for like- Tsunade. Here you have a useful girl who is also body confident! And that’s not even touching on Sarada “can use both super strength and the sharingan and owns this fact” Uchiha.

Reason 7. Boruto’s issues are not his dad’s issues. There are ... lots of “kid sequels” i’ve seen/read/heard of where all the problems are basically the main character’s problems rehashed. And yeah, the villains so far are that I’ve seen are callbacks to the main show, BUT. EMOTIONALLY. Boruto’s issues aren’t the same. Boruto doesn’t have the “nobody likes me I must earn their respect” issues Naruto did. Or the orphan issues. He has a loving mom, he’s a loving big brother (who makes mistakes and does argue with his sister, which #realistic kthanks), and he is popular. Being alone isn’t his problem. Being unpopular or hated isn’t his problem. His problems are that he doesn’t know how to bond with his always-busy dad (which- of course Naruto is always busy, that’s just the show writers continuing the Overworked Hokage gag from the original show, and yes Naruto uses his Shadow Clones to help with it but come ON he’s running a military force AND a booming village) and that he hasn’t had the same life experiences Naruto had at that age. He’s learning to mature in a different way. If Naruto and Naruto Shippuden were about children who grew up too soon in a brutal ninja world, then Boruto is about kids who grow up in the AFTERMATH of that world. The world where their parents never want their kids to suffer like that and so, just a little, coddle them. It’s kinda like the aftermath of the big wars. The kids who grew up during that war are adults now and their kids have COMPLETELY DIFFERENT life experiences and priorities. It’s just how it works, and I appreciate that.

Reason 8. We have a girl Uchiha who wants to be Hokage. I love the Naruto and Naruto Shippuden shows, but it got ... a LITTLE tiresome that Naruto’s dream was also the dream of both his dad AND his mom and I think also kid Jiraiya at one point? Like- it seemed like at that point the show was going “Of course you want to be hokage! It’s in your blood!”. Boruto couldn’t care less bout being the next Hokage. He’s lived what it’s like to be the Hokage’s kid (something Asuma, if he’s still been alive, could have sympathized with I’m sure) and he doesn’t want to be that person. Sarada on the other hand has lived the live of having no real dad figure until recently, and as such Naruto’s “all the village is my family” motto really rings home with her. She wants to be the next Hokage, not Boruto, and frankly that’s refreshing.

Reason 9. Shino the teacher. I’m pretty sure this is a controversial point but honestly I really liked this. I do have some issues with how the og characters are portrayed (looking at you Kiba and Anko), but Shino I have no issues with. This is an intelligent, helpful boy who grew up struggling to bond with people and who grew up with people constantly interrupting him/not listening. And this gag does make its frequent appearance in Boruto, but that’s not Boruto’s fault that’s actually a case of the show being consistent with its predecessor so, you know, go blame Kishimoto for how his students didn't listen to him in the early episodes. BUT. As the episodes go on, it’s so clear the students do love and respect their teacher. They wouldn’t talk to him if they didn’t. They might not see him as a terrifying warrior, but he’s their TEACHER. Even Mitsuki comes to respect Shino, going out of his way (spoiler) to fight Shino in the graduation exam because Mitsuki saw Shino as someone worth testing himself against. Mitsuki. Orochimaru’s “perfect clone bby”. Thought Shino was badass enough to fight. And also on the student body in general, OBVIOUSLY they listen to him off screen, because if they didn’t then they wouldn’t have learned the things they did and have actually succeeded in the graduation exam, now could they?

Reason 10. Naruto and Sasuke are still utterly epic WITHOUT stealing the spotlight the moment they come on screen. I’m not that far into the show, so maybe that changes, but from the arcs I’ve seen (mostly the Shin arc), Naruto and Sasuke are utter powerhouses, but they don’t ... they don’t just hax the show. In the same way Jiraiya didn’t hax everything and steal the spotlight from Naruto, neither do Naruto and Sasuke, but we still see they’re awesome (after all, they were perfectly capable while fighting all the Shins, and just- the moment one of them got a look at Kuruma it was OVER and it’s SO clear in that moment that Sasuke and Naruto were holding back because they didn’t want to kill a bunch of kids. Naruto or Sasuke on their own could have MASSACRED the Shins, but didn’t, because they’re former protagonists (and reformed antagonist in one case) like that.

So... tl:dr Boruto is not Naruto or Naruto Shippuden but considering all the massive plot holes and world-building errors that happened in those shows, as well as the utter lack of use of its female characters, that’s not a bad thing! Boruto has some stuff wrong with it, and some things that I can see annoying/ticking off fans who had their heart set on another path, but the show has potential, the characters are utilized much better than I expected, and as someone who did not grow up on Naruto and so doesn’t have shiny nostalgia glasses spot welded to my face, I think it’s a really good show.

Honestly if it wasn’t a sequel of such a monolith, childhood-forming show, I think it wouldn’t get NEAR as much hate, and the fact that it gets such flak because it dares have its own unique take on the post-Naruto Shippuden years rather than trying (and inevitably failing) to cater to the whims of every single fan out there makes me sad. If you want to see more of Naruto’s world and see female characters actually get some cool moments to themselves, then give it a try. If you’d rather go with your own Naruto HCs for what happened at the end of the war, then that’s FINE, just don’t get mad at those of us who enjoy Boruto for the glorious animated fanfic AU it is.

[ohbyunhunn]

Same as my Hiruzen post, just wanna keep this analysis using the feminist (I hope I did it right and my Literature teachers won’t roll their eyes at me lol) (but it’s just for Twitter so wtvr) approach on my Tumblr too. Was posted on July 11 2020:

Ok this has been in my (Twitter) drafts for so long but I wanted to wait till I finish all 500 episodes to post this lol. I love Naruto but God, the writing for its female characters is shit. This is written based only on Naruto and Naruto Shippūden (manga and anime). I think it got better in Boruto but I’ve yet to see it. Anyway

Women are not given the burden of carrying important roles that represent relationships built throughout the series, as if, they are not capable of creating bonds strong enough to drive a character even though it is what Naruto is all about; the importance of bonds between humans. 

Examples of relationships; 

Friends: Naruto-Sasuke, Kakashi-Obito 

Kouhai-senpai: Itachi-Shisui 

Siblings: Itachi-Sasuke 

Student-teacher: Naruto-Jiraiya, Naruto-Iruka, Asuma-Shikamaru 

Patriotism: Itachi-Konoha, Shisui-Konoha 

Lovers to enemies: Hashirama-Madara ( :p )

These relationships as we all know are the basis of the series’ plots and developments. I mean, if not for Naruto’s feelings towards Sasuke, the anime won’t exist... and if not for Sasuke’s feelings towards Itachi, he wouldn’t have abandoned Naruto... and if not for Itachi’s patriotism towards his village, he wouldn’t have killed off the Uchiha clan, which is the reason why Sasuke hated him in the first place. These three related, complementing events are I think crucial instances of what the Naruto universe is built upon. They also are the reason other relationships were able to be expanded (i.e. Itachi-Shisui share the same loyalty and love for Konoha, Naruto became Jiraiya’s apprentice to be able to compete with Sasuke). 

And as u can see, no female characters are involved at all. Only time female characters are seen creating bonds and/or have a role to move the plot is when they are driven by romance (e.g. Hinata-Naruto, Tsunade-Dan, Karin-Sasuke). This paints the idea that women are only concerned of men and romance in the anime?? Even a simple friendship between female characters was almost impossible to be portrayed healthily (i.e. Sakura-Ino are supposedly good friends but they always put down each other). 

The anime itself has agreed that the sole reason a female is present amongst male characters is because they are able to be motivated when a woman is around to be impressed, which will lead them to wanting to improve themselves and become better shinobi. 

When Kakashi asked Hiruzen why were Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura put together in a team, the answer he got was because Sasuke needs someone with the experience of using Sharingan to be there for him when his is activated and in order to be able to control the Kyuubi inside Naruto in case it goes berserk again, Sharingan is needed, which is a sound reason why the two of them are put together. 

And Sakura??? Hiruzen said (omg it still pisses me off), she’s only in Team 7 because that would drive the boys to become stronger because they would want to impress Sakura. Like?? She only exists to be a fucking trophy that could be won is it?? That’s it?? I think this was why at first I was against Sakura and Sasuke’s relationship. IT DIDN’T SEEM TRUE. Yea yea I know there are scenes that have suggested their feelings are mutual but lol let’s be real. Boruto saved it. If not for how they’re presented in Boruto,,, lol. 

Anyway, Kakashi was seen to be on the same page with Hiruzen because he was reminded of how Obito worked hard to catch up to him so that he could impress Rin. The same thing happened to Hiruzen’s team; Jiraiya wanted to beat Orochimaru just to catch Tsunade’s attention. I understand that it is natural for boys (and girls) to improve themselves in order to attract the person they like but to give female characters no role other than to be a trophy?? That’s just dumb and objectifying. 

Sakura got a shit ton of hate ever since Naruto (her character only improved A BIT in Shippūden), and honestly, Idt it’s her fault. Her character writing was so shit that all she ever did was scream Sasuke’s name and when Sasuke is knocked out, she’d call for Naruto. She has a great potential to become a kunoichi of the same level as her teammates but the anime never tried to put the spotlight on her. A lot of times we saw other characters say “wow Sakura has potential” but we never see that being polished on screen. 

If only she was given the chance to take an active role in battles, maybe the anime would’ve appeared better in regards to its treatment towards female characters. The only battle that I remember of with Sakura taking an active part in it??? Her fight with Sasori. Not saying that her role during the war is insignificant but even with that in mind, when Sasuke is present, she could only think of him?? 

And SHE COULD’VE STOPPED MUGEN TSUKUYOMI BY DESTROYING OBITO’s RINNEGAN BUT BECAUSE SHE HESITATED, MADARA MANAGED TO STEAL IT!! 

[ This video has all the Sakura scenes that pissed me off. ]

Why did she hesitate?? She’s a medic nin fgs?? This is what I meant by her writing is shit. The Sakura that I know wouldn’t think twice to do what she needed to. AND to think that just a few moments before, SHE SAVED NARUTO’S LIFE?? BY PUMPING HIS HEART USING HER HAND??? And he survived!! With her aid!! The fact that she managed to pull that off but not destroying Obito’s Rinnegan is just pure bullshit. 

But I’m sort of glad they had the filler episodes where they showed Sakura’s (and Ino’s) growth, how they went thru their training and stuff. It’s not much but thanks for the fillers I guess?? The manga can go suck some balls. 

Another mention of a female character being disregarded as an important ninja would be Konan. Throughout the Naruto vs Akatsuki arc, Konan’s skills and determination have been displayed countless of times. And I’m glad she was given the chance to prove her ability but what rubbed me off the wrong way was Jiraiya’s opinion on her. Every time he spoke of the three orphans he took in, he always mentioned Nagato’s strength and Yahiko’s desire to bring peace in a positive manner. But when it comes to Konan, his only adjective for her was “pretty”. 

Konan is more than just a feminine presence with beauty as her only personality?? She’s a strong-willed person who is able to stand alongside her comrades in fighting for what they believe in. She was willing to sacrifice herself in order to defeat Obito/Madara in a heartbeat!! Jiraiya could’ve said better things about her. 

From this, we can say how biased a male character’s view is on other females?? As if, only men would fight against injustices of the shinobi world but women?? uwu she pretty yes she will grow up to be a beautifoOl woman. 

Kishimoto couldn’t write women very well and he admitted this himself but God, I wish he would’ve tried harder. Not able to write women well is such a shitty excuse for a writer... especially when we know his female characters are capable just as much as their male counterparts. 

Also I try to take this positively but you know how during Naruto’s time, the only medic nins are his female characters? (i.e. Sakura, Ino, Tsunade) I think he meant to portray women as healers and that’s a pure intention but lol it also sort of sends the message that to him, no matter how smart and talented a woman is, they shall not be given the duty to fight!! They should just wait and be ready to receive injured comrades while the boys go fight evil and bring peace!! I wanna give credit to him for making women healers but lol does he deserve it?? 

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[dokuhebi]

Sakura / cont. @shikkotsunin​  

Sakura’s heart lurches into her throat when they speak, but the Sannin is right: there would come a time when she would have to face someone dear, someone who she possessed in her memory with tenderness and smiles, and there would be something ugly she’d uncover. Sakura knew better than to think that this would end in fanfare, that she would escape intact. Doing the right thing was rarely the most wanted, especially in a haven of patriotism like Konoha where people lived happily and obliviously. Because that was the social contract: in order to live in safety, people were willing to give up certain freedoms, to shutter their view of certain avenues, all in order to live in some semblance of peace.

Except, where did you draw the line? How many freedoms were relinquished until one couldn’t move? How blinkered could someone be before they were blinded and made to look at a painting of what the higher ups wanted to see? It was funny. Orochimaru had long been a tenebrous being shrouded in shadows, this fluid scapegoat that transformed according to the accuser’s accusation. That didn’t mean she saw them as innocent, but Morino’sensei had taught her that she had to look where it was gray. That in between point A and point B, she needed a winding, meandering route to take in between. “I’ll be honest with you, Orochimaru-sama, Morino-sensei mentioned something like that. Once, I was the foolish girl screaming at Sasuke to come back to the village. I didn’t know why he didn’t want to return. Then I found out.”

Ibiki had been stern with her. She’d be the face of what she was undertaking, there was no mistaking that. People would see her, and accuse her. She couldn’t afford to see things as she had for years, and even if the light in her eyes had dulled some, she’d learned. By the gods, she’d learned. Reading, and reading, and reading. Running through the lives of so many different people, taking notes and mapping bridges between them. What crimes connected to what, what mental illness possessed what symptoms. Being good and gray as he’d told her to be.

“I think, in any other circumstance, I would have been at your throat. If I didn’t know, I’d shout at you for ‘corrupting’ Sasuke. For the past deeds you were portrayed as being the sole factor in. A mad scientist who chased immortality.” Her gaze was sharp upon them, but it doesn’t possess a threat. It was a memory. Gray matter where they were stored. “But, you’re in the gray. You’ve seen the playing field at both sides, and we both know I need that insight. I can’t afford to go to people who only have ever seen the village’s good and see nothing else.”

Taking another sip of her drink–maybe too generous to be just that–she placed her ochoko down again. “To answer that, yes. He can’t overtly pledge his support–since no one knows how successful this will be–but he’s given me more than adequate clearance. Enough to garner the resources I need.” What a lie it would be if this didn’t fill her with icy fear and resolved fire all at once, like the cold of that dungeon basement where the village disgorged the rotted and badly decayed corpses at her feet.

Sakura felt her eyes widen and throat tighten at the divulging of this new information, gripping her cup so tightly she could feel it crack and splinter. “I see. I think the obvious answer to the imprisoned man is to visit him first. Leverage his anger to work in my favor.” She wasn’t the same girl. As she’d been taught by one of the most dangerous men in Konoha, she felt like a predator. Sizing up weakness, looking for holes to exploit. It was a dangerous mindset, because power could corrupt so easily. Getting drunk on the assurance of victory was so like her impulsive temper, wasn’t it?

“Figuratively speaking, if I was to accompany you on such a mission after we finish what we do, how would you plan on rooting them out? Fake terrorist cell to pander to their wiles? Information? Or do you just know them well enough to follow their scent?” Of course, there was always the possibility of utilizing Orochimaru’s own assets as bait. The information, the forbidden jutsu, the people that could be leveraged or coveted items scattered like bird seed for them to find. Endless tracts of temptations for those running and seeking power.

“Is it a bit blunt to say we probably won’t need much time spent here? We’re both too experienced for that. In fact, maybe I can contact Kakashi-sensei to have leave to proceed the next objective.”

Corrupted Sasuke? They certainly had played a part, but that boys innocence had been lost the moment his brother stuck a knife in to his mothers throat. Leaving the body before his siblings young eyes. It hadn’t taken much to give the Uchiha a little push in to darkness. To take credit for corrupting him, as odd a victory that may seem to those less keen on using manipulation as a toy, it wasn’t fit for the serpent. But her comment still gets a smile from them, the thought that she may have, if she were that same girl from years before, be waging war upon seeing them. It certainly would have been a conversation coloured differently. They prefer this shade. When they hear the crack of the cup and see the intensity rise in her green eyes, their slender hands reaches across the table. Pale fingers lightly coiling around her wrist to position her hold nearer the wooden surface, a subtle request she unhand the object in her grasp. Lest more damage is dealt. They can’t help being amused by her response however - they liked ambition that teetered in to obsession. For truly, how else could anyone fully invest in a project without placing that much in to the goal? Like a dog fixated on a rabbit, or a doctor in surgery with a patient. If one did not lose themselves intensely in their task, if they didn’t give undivided attention, the results were simply never the same. “Each one of them will require a different means to reveal their location,” they say releasing her hand, golden eyes briefly veiled by thought, evidently working out each and every target in accordance to ease, “Tachimasa has a long list of health issues, he would be unable to live anywhere regionally cold or medically underdeveloped. Keeping that in mind, I can narrow down the search and have Karin assist with seeking him out,” they begin, knowing the woman would not bother question the vipers reasons for making use of her sensory abilities. There were only so many warm and well developed villages that did not coincide with being past enemies of the Hidden Leaf. They move on to the next council member. “Hagemu has been indulging in the trade of illegal weaponry since his defection,” they say, “elusive as he is, I can easily make contact with those who work under him, and see if using Kusanagi as bait will draw him out in person. Since my affiliation with the Hidden Leaf is not public knowledge, I doubt he will be scared off assuming I have connections with his enemies. If anything, someone like me is just who he is used to getting business from.”

Then there was the final council member, someone the viper had quite respected when they were younger. Thinking the workings of her mind to be brilliant, curious with how vocally, and with unwavering confidence, she would demand better reasoning from Hiruzen during meetings.  “Lastly, there is Machiho-sama,” they say, “I know the prison she was originally placed in, but the chances she was relocated is something to consider. Either way, the movement of prisoners is tracked and recorded, the paper trail will be easy enough to get a hold of and use.” Now their gaze becomes curious, evidently about to place their first hurdle in front of Sakura, to see what she is willing to do, wanting to do and deeming necessary or risky. The outcome of this little mission is not quite in the serpents interest, but how easily won over they are when it comes to ambitious shinobi. They would be lying if they said they didn’t want to see where her mission would lead her. What would become of her ideals, goals and mind. “You could leverage her anger... or, you could wager her freedom,” they say, fangs flashed briefly in their grin. Propping an elbow on the table, their head rests lazily on their hand, their gaze catlike in a playfully predatory fashion, “she was imprisoned for treason, because she refused to allow Hiruzen to continue down his path of no return. She was much like you, absolute in her pursuit for proper justice. It wasn’t seen as heroic during my days as a child however. Her questioning of the Hokage, her effort to be more open with the public against orders... it is why she was silenced behind bars. Perhaps you would be killing two birds with one stone hm? Freeing her could be seen as another means to acquire justice, and gaining the information you seek may be an added reward.”

[electrasev5nwrites]

Ninja Daily: Vapors 53

Seven sets of footsteps made varying volumes of scuffling sounds on the dirt road out of Konoha one early morning, a cacophony that nearly drowned out the sounds of birdsong and wind tugging at drying leaves. If it had been a little less windy, it might well have muffled all other sounds, even though some of the footsteps were near silent. The bizarrely loud treads from three of the party members more than made up for the deficit.

They'd taken up a variation on a standard formation—a triangle. Sasuke took the tip, with Kakashi walking a few feet behind his right heel, Aiko was to Kakashi's right, and Sai stood way over on the left while their clients huddled between the shinobi.

"Let's hope this mission works out," Kakashi sighed after a few hours of walking in silence, as if he had been mulling over their recent string of missions. Aiko didn't buy it—he was attempting to stir up trouble to get an amusing reaction from the team. The unusually calm, temperate weather and lack of inter-team drama was probably boring him to tears.

Like the predictable chump he was, Sai gave a sunny smile with his eyes creased shut.

'Decent attempt,' Aiko scored mentally. 'Maybe a six out of ten, grading on a curve to compensate for his general ineptitude?'

She'd developed a grading rubric in the weeks they'd been stationed on back-to-back missions together. It wasn't like there was much else to do. The odd tension between Sai and Sasuke and Kakashi's general nonchalance had unfortunately made her the peacekeeper by default. She had no skill at the role whatsoever. At times like this, she desperately missed sweet, charismatic Naruto and even Sakura. The little girl had been a people-pleaser by nature, and clever enough to maneuver conversations that almost everyone was pleased by.

Sai lacked that conversational skill entirely, but hell if he didn't try to make friends anyway. She gave him so many points for effort and unintentional hilarity.

"I happen to like these missions," the boy in question interjected blandly. "I find it very interesting to see how Dickless can destabilize the most mundane of missions with his very presence."

The two possible outcomes of this trip seemed about equally likely :

Sasuke would become a Chuunin and rub it in Naruto's face when he came back home

Sasuke would snap and actually kill Sai with a blunt rock, forgoing all shinobi training in favor of his mindless hate for the other boy even though he factually knew it would endanger his promotion. He would get promoted anyways because Tsunade would just be sick of trying.

Her thoughts might have been on the same wavelength as her Uchiha teammate. Sasuke's fingers twitched as if he was longing to wrap them around Sai's neck, but the impulse was too Naruto-ish for him to actually indulge in.

'To be fair, Sai has a point.'

It wasn't even that Sasuke had done anything—it really did seem to be his very presence that jinxed things. Forget Naruto, Sasuke was a luck token of some sort. (Good or bad, she wasn't sure, but definitely luck).

The civilian family they were going to be escorting looked downright unnerved at this point. The teenage daughter Hana was clutching the straps of her green backpack so tightly that her fingers were turning white. Her young-looking parents (Ichigo and Mei) exchanged uncertain glances.

Aiko leaned around her mentor and aimed a reassuring smile at them, cutely clasping her hands behind her back to portray an unthreatening demeanor that would be more palatable to non-shinobi. "Don't mind them," she explained. "They're just joking around. You have nothing to worry about with us here. I know we look a bit young, but all three of us are competent shinobi, and Kakashi-shishou is one of the best shinobi in the world."

Strangely, they didn't seem reassured at all.

"Suck-up," Sasuke muttered under his breath from the front of the group. Without missing a beat, Kakashi extended a foot and sent him tripping face-first into the dirt. He'd done it quickly enough that Aiko almost missed the motion. She might have, if she hadn't been expecting something similar. He was petty sometimes. Their clients skittered back nervously to keep a distance from the grumpiest party member. Sai merely looked on while Sasuke irritably spat out dirt and regained his footing. His expression was blank but somehow managed to convey curiosity through his tilted head and unblinking stare. Sai was a bit like the world's tallest and hunkiest owl, really.

Aiko took a moment to glare at her teammates, who had just undone all the soothing she'd done. Calming other people just didn't come naturally to her, so she didn't appreciate having her ham-handed efforts undermined. "Whatever," she grunted, purposefully shoving her mentor with a shoulder. He allowed it and pretended to sway away from the force she mustered, which probably didn't help the impression that their aghast clients were gaining about their expensive escort. Even despite knowing that she was a shinobi, they probably didn't put much stock in her physical prowess. She wasn't particularly intimidating in appearance, even with a gigantic dog summons trailing by her side. Unfortunately.

Uncertain or not, they were apparently committed enough that they didn't muster up any complaints and obediently followed along with Kakashi's absent-minded directions.

'Makes sense,' Aiko noted. 'I bet hiring an escort is really pricey. On the bright side, they probably got a great deal, considering they managed to swing two ANBU level shinobi and the Hokage's apprentice.'

She would have told them that if she could—it probably would have soothed their minds. But it would have been grossly inappropriate for her to share confidential information like that about Kakashi and Sai. Sasuke's position wasn't classified, but it would probably be best not to talk about it either.

If this mission somehow went downhill into a spectacular blaze of incompetence and mind-bendingly bad luck, it might be a good idea not to have the highest echelons in their village directly embarrassed by the fiasco.

So their poor clients would just have to suffer nervously until the team got a chance to prove themselves.

'It's amazing that Naruto isn't even here, but having two-thirds of the surviving team seven together is somehow enough to tap into whatever alternate universe stores his weird karma,' she mused.

Then again, even in the manga, Sasuke's story arc had been fucking weird on its own merits. Maybe Naruto was completely blameless. Maybe there was nothing weird about Naruto's luck in the first place. He could just be a normal little boy.

Kakashi startled and gave Aiko a wary stare when she suddenly began choking on what appeared to be nothing. He warily patted her shoulder, pulling his hand back immediately as if he'd been burnt. "Okay there?"

"H-hai," she gasped, fanning her face with a hand. "Sorry, it's nothing."

'No way. Naruto is definitely weird as all hell. S'why I love him.'

Mindful that Kakashi had been downright unnerved by her inexplicable good humor, she wiped her face as blank as possible. She needed to pay attention and be alert, since she was on the clock. With any luck at all, they'd run into a moderately difficult fight that could be used as a justification for giving Sasuke his damn promotion already. A field promotion was perfectly respectable, after all, even if it wasn't as flashy as an exam promotion.

Mitsuo whined, a warm weight brushing against her right hip. Aiko glanced down and ran her fingers through the thick, white fur at his neck soothingly. He leaned his thick neck into her hand, snuffling sadly at her fingers. It was the first time he'd been out with her on an extended mission, but it was starting to seem like they would never have time to bond in Konoha.

"I know, I know," she murmured to the ninken sympathetically. He was having a hard time spending nights away from home. It was lucky that Pakkun had pulled her aside and explained some things to her, because Mitsuo couldn't speak any human language. He would probably never be able to.

That was yet another reason why it was so important for them to spend a lot of time together. If he was going to be her companion, they had to develop camaraderie and the ability to understand one another. He had a fairly good understanding of human speech (something like a toddler's vocabulary, but geared towards shinobi life), and she was learning some barks, but neither of them could properly vocalize the other's language. That meant that nonverbal communication was going to be crucial, as were the coded communications that they were still working out. There wasn't much need for Mitsuo to speak in riddles—it would never be an issue unless they were fighting another ninken summoner (or maybe a wolf or coyote with a similar dialect). But Aiko was actually working on teaching him a bit of English. Kakashi seemed perplexed by the strange sounds – syllables that didn't exist in Konoha, particularly—but she didn't see a reason to make up obscure references when she could teach him things she readily knew. It didn't make things any harder for her ninken, after all.

The only way to get that vital bonding done was just to spend time with each other. Their clients and Sai seemed a bit curious, but Sasuke gave her an unusually wide berth after she had summoned Mitsuo.

It wasn't that he was frightened of or disliked dogs, of course. (Although that wouldn't have been an unusual response to a dog that probably weighed more than Aiko did). No. It was because Mitsuo's hackles had gone up the instant he got a whiff of Sasuke and had insistently circled him, barking and growling for two painfully long minutes while Aiko tried to figure it out. Kakashi hadn't met them by the gate at that point, so she was on her own. Though it felt presumptuous, she eventually summoned Pakkun and begged for help.

He'd looked at her like she was an idiot while Mitsuo insistently danced around Sasuke. "The puppy is saying that one there smells like cats." He licked his nose, apparently oblivious to just how repulsed Sasuke appeared to be by the motion. But perhaps he'd noticed, because the pug continued. "He does reek of cat," Pakkun added decisively. Then he gave a few short barks that appeared to turn into an argument and a royal scolding. Mitsuo perked up his ears and glanced between his elder and the boy he was so insistently keeping corralled away from his summoner. He yipped and whined, but eventually pulled his ears down flat and groveled onto his tummy, awkwardly pawing his way over to Aiko's side.

"There," Pakkun sighed. He turned to Aiko, scratching at his neck with a rear paw. "I explained that you have to tolerate the cat stench because you're teammates."

Sasuke looked more than a bit disgruntled. "I don't even have a cat," he bit out shortly.

Both dogs gave him pitying looks. It was hard not to laugh. Pakkun took one long sniff, and decisively judged, "Is Uchiha."

"Is Uchiha," Kakashi (who she had definitely not heard arrive), agreed solemnly.

Sasuke twitched, looking somewhere between murderous and baffled. "Well-spotted," he eventually condescended.

Mitsuo whuffed. Pakkun gave a growling laugh in reply, and tilted his head so sharply that Pakkun smacked himself in the face with one of his floppy ears. "Then what's the question, boy?"

"I don't see the connection. I don't have the Uchiha nin-cat contract. I don't even have a regular cat." He jerked his head irritably at Aiko, clearly not happy about being growled at. "She has a cat. Growl at her."

"S'not a cat," Pakkun said sagely. Mitsuo agreed with a series of low vocalizations that startled Kakashi into giving Aiko a strange look. "He says he saw it hack up a burning hairball once," Pakkun helpfully supplied. "Can't be a cat. Some kind of furry lizard, probably."

There was a spectacularly awkward silence. Aiko pretended not to feel the stares. "Well, that's all sorted out and everyone's here!" she chirped with false enthusiasm. "Time to set off on an adventure."

"Aiko." Sasuke's disbelieving tone stopped her in her tracks.

She rolled her eyes and shrugged helplessly. Smaug was really more like Hinata's cat now, to be honest. She was either some sort of crazy talented animal whisperer or Smaug just sensed a similar soul in her. "I was uninvolved in that."

That pretty well stopped conversation for the first hour or so of their long walk.

'Come to think of it, that might be when the clients started to seem a bit uncomfortable around us,' Aiko reminisced fondly. She should probably feel guilty, but… couldn't quite muster up the energy. They weren't being paid to make friends. Their job was to safely get their client out of Fire Country, not pretend to be a luxury cruise service.

It was a pretty lazy mission, made even more so by the necessity of putting extra work on Sasuke to give him a crash source in field work. Aiko and Sai lurked around and set up camp that first night while Kakashi followed Sasuke to be sure his procedure running a perimeter check and setting up acceptable traps was up to snuff. They were gone long enough that Aiko eventually felt badly enough for their poor clients (who were obviously unused to long travel) and helped them set up their bedrolls and dug out a campfire for them. Sai merely looked on, idly running a clean brush over a notebook as if drawing invisibly.

"Thanks," Hana panted, wiping her forehead back as if to clear sweaty bangs, but her skin was completely dry.

'That's a bit odd,' Aiko noted without indicating anything about her thoughts externally. 'Her breathing patterns indicate exertion, but no sweat?'

It was unusual, but she didn't comment. All three of their clients seemed in much better shape by the time Sasuke and Kakashi returned, if a bit unpleasantly startled by just how quickly they appeared in the middle of the group toting bloody animals.

"You can cook." Sasuke tossed his directly at Sai. The artist caught both rabbits, but the swinging momentum spattered his face with what was probably still warm blood. Ichigo looked decidedly green, reaching out to take his wife's hand.

Sai gave a very strained smile—more so than usual, and awkwardly wiped the rabbit blood off his cheek and nose with a palm. It smudged a little and didn't entirely come off. "Of course. I am honored that you trust me with such a task." He paused. "Does this mean that you are courting me? This reminds me of a proverb about the duties a man has to his beloved. You see, when a man loves-"

"Ah, maybe we can talk about that later," Aiko hastily interjected, tugging the animals out of Sai's loose grip and pulling him to the fire by his hand. "I'll help. Thank you, Sasuke, Kakashi. They're lovely."

Sai's brow furrowed. He looked first at the rabbits he had been given, then to a fuming Sasuke, and then between Aiko and Kakashi as she snatched the food their team leader had brought back out of his hands.

Before he had a chance to open his mouth, Aiko had shoved everything into his arms and sparked up the fire to make sure it was going strong before laying down a leather tarp and pulling out a kunai. "Sai, would you skin those?" She gave him a meaningful look.

"Yes. We will talk later?"

She choked down a laugh, avoiding looking at Sasuke who was probably breathing smoke at that point. "Of course, Sai. We can talk about anything you want."

'Well, almost anything. I don't guarantee you'll get the answers you want,' she amended. He was probably still spying for Danzo, after all.

Doubtless, she wasn't the only one who knew that. Since Tsunade almost certainly suspected him, Sasuke must know as well. Kakashi could know too—he'd been in ANBU long enough that he could be aware of the other branch and was old enough to remember the scandal of Danzo being ordered to dissolve his private forces. They might even both know that the other knew, but there was no reason for either of them to know that she knew. She'd never been told, after all.

Aiko wasn't particularly worried. She knew how Kakashi treated threats, and none of the signs were present. Oddly enough, he seemed to be doing his best to be friendly to Sai. Of course, 'friendly' for Kakashi was more than a bit stilted and difficult, so she was taking it upon herself to be the bridge to the team. It made sense that he might be trying to ensure the Root nin felt welcomed. Obvious hostility would make it obvious that they knew he was a spy.

'Besides, Naruto managed to convert him in canon. That means that Sai is probably vulnerable to peer influence. He doesn't understand his own emotions, and he's brainwashed enough to think that he doesn't even have them.' (a particularly idiotic move on Danzo's part). 'All in all, Sai is highly susceptible to manipulation from anyone who spends an extended period of time with him. A bit of kindness here, a bit of respect there, and maybe even a semi-friendly rivalry…'

She intentionally did not smile. Sasuke would probably be vexed if he realized that his unfeigned irritation with the other boy was teaching him scripts for semi-hostile but still nonviolent human interaction. Worse, Sai learned by mimicry and repetition. That meant that his insults only got more clever and accurate every time the boys locked horns, and he had discovered that innuendo was one of the best ways to get under Sasuke's skin.

Probably the best part was that she was relatively certain Sai had decided to give the oft-discussed Icha Icha a try. Every once in a while, he'd make a comment or almost-reference that made her suspicions flare up. That made Sasuke the odd man out, actually. He still thought they were foul perversions and seemed to be doing his best to pretend not to notice any references.

As with any escort mission, the days quickly fell into a dull monotony. Kakashi pulled out his books and read while they walked, but no one else had anything for entertainment. The small family occasionally made token attempts to draw their escorts into conversation, but it was stilted and uncomfortable. By the third night, Kakashi let Sasuke run the perimeter alone, and had a chance to see the depressingly fumbled way their clients managed to unpack and pack their belongings. He and Sai exchanged a meaningful glance behind their backs. Aiko had to bite her lip to repress her suspicions as to what they were communicating. There would be no point in saying anything aloud—her comrades knew what she was thinking.

Like the past nights, she took a spot far from the banked fire, letting Mitsuo curl up into her side for the comfort of a half-hearted puppy pile. The shared body heat was nice—she seemed to run pretty cold, and was generally pretty uncomfortable at nights. Even still, she had to tuck her fingers under her shirt onto her belly to keep them from turning into icicles while she slept. Sasuke had given her a vaguely repulsed expression the first day, but by now seemed resigned to her apparently weird decision to share bedspace with a ninken.

She didn't understand why he cared in the first place. It wasn't like Mitsuo was dirtier than the rest of them or anything, and his doggy scent wasn't offensive at all.

'Maybe Pakkun was right', she mused. 'Sasuke's a cat'. (That was actually closer to what he'd been implying that first day. Pakkun and Mitsuo weren't offended that Sasuke had merely been in contact with a cat. Ninken were far too intelligent to hold that sort of grudge—regular cats barely pinged on their radar. Ninja cats like the ones historically linked to the Uchiha to the point where their scent lingered in their compound so many years later, on the other hand…) In her mind, she symbolically linked Yamato and Sasuke as the cat people she had to work with despite their persistent silliness.

It was a shame, but not everyone could be so lucky as to score a ninken partner.

Despite the way that there was constant conversation, Aiko learned surprisingly little private information from quietly listening to their clients' discussion. They didn't seem to be very interesting people.

They had been interested, on the other hand, in the antics of their ninja protectors. After his disastrous attempt to miff Sai by making him do the petty work, Sasuke didn't dare hand Sai food at night. (That might have been for the best, because his roasted rabbit had been a bit dry and bland). Instead, he sullenly ignored the other boy. She was almost convinced that Sai missed the banter by the way he kept glancing at the Uchiha.

Feeling a bit bad for him—she was never certain if Sai genuinely felt left out or if he was antisocial—she sat down by him on the fifth night on a large rock while Sasuke grumbled and did some sort of cooking magic. (The boy had a kami-given talent.) He looked at her curiously. It only took him a second to drastically change the atmosphere.

"Are we going to have that conversation about a man and a woman now?" he inquired innocently. "Sasuke never answered my question."

Movement around the camp stopped.

'Sai is either a fantastic troll, or just the most clueless human being there has ever been.'

"Perhaps later," Kakashi idly interjected from his sudden position on Sai's other side. Aiko pressed her eyes shut to avoid giving him a scathing look. That kind of deflection would never work, regardless of the sincerity behind the first question. Sai wasn't stupid, and he wouldn't appreciate being pushed aside.

Surely enough…

Sai glanced at Kakashi, then Aiko, and then turned to smile at Kakashi. "Is this a threesome?" he asked innocently. "I believe that Icha Icha Tactics contains a scene that begins much like this one. It seems to be an acceptable proposition." Then he frowned contemplatively, examining Kakashi closely. "Although I would like to know one thing before we begin. Am I the banana, or the donut?"

Kakashi slid off the rock as if scalded. "All yours, Aiko," he muttered, unconsciously tugging at that mop masquerading as hair on his head and hustling over to help Sasuke with smoking rations for the next day.

She stuck her tongue out at him.

"No, it's not like Tactics," she answered calmly. "Although I think that's one of the strongest books in the series. What did you think of the depiction of the Daimyo in that one? It's very controversial, you know, though Jiraiya-san technically denied that it was intentional satire."

'There, easily deflected. He likes being asked what he thinks about non-personal things.'

There seemed to be no luck in the world for them in other matters, however. They were only taking the family a bit past Konoha's border with Tea. At civilian speed, they had already been walking for a full week, and there were only a few days left on their mission.

Sasuke was getting decidedly twitch at the possibility of another inexplicably easy mission. It almost seemed unlikely that they would run into no problems at all on such an extended trip. Where were the bandits? Wild animals? Potholes? At this point, she would accept just about any tribulation. It only had to be classified as a combat mission for Tsunade to be able to bend the rules and grant Sasuke a promotion. Sure, she might have to obscure the direct circumstances, but that would probably only serve to make Sasuke seem more impressive with such a mysterious circumstance around his promotion.

Like divine intervention, that was when she sensed four humans with advanced chakra systems coming their way, about a mile off. Granted, they were only moving at low to mid-level Chuunin speeds, (meaning they had a couple minutes) but when combined with the other oddities about this mission…

She'd take it.

"Shishou, orders?"

He looked at her disinterestedly, ignoring the baffled expressions from their clients. Sasuke and Sai looked sharply between the two. Silly non-sensors that they were, they probably didn't know about their soon-to-be visitors yet.

"I think we'll stay the course," he mused idly, spinning a kunai on an index finger using the ringed end. "Steady ahead and all that."

She rolled her eyes. "Is the most recent Icha Icha about pirates?"

(Aiko knew damn well that it was. She had a half-read copy hidden under her mattress at home.)

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Kakashi virtuously lied, glancing at the scandalized man steering his staring daughter away from him. Hana couldn't seem to keep her eyes off of him. "Look, we should just be quiet and pay attention to our surroundings."

"That ship has sailed," Sai cheerily piped in, looking unduly pleased at being able to contribute to conversation.

'Not the worst play on words,' Aiko noted. Really, when grading on a curve of "Sai", it was pretty good.

She took a moment to imagine the group turning to Sasuke for his contribution. In her mind's eye, he turned around with that dead-pan bitch face he wore so well.

"Avast."

And then he turned back around, duty done.

Sadly, it was not to be. Apparently Sasuke didn't like pirate jokes, because Sai's appeared to be the last straw. He whipped around and inadvertently activated his bloodline just in time to catch a sudden movement from behind the group. "Look out!" He spun on his heels, already in an aggressive posture.

Kakashi, for whom the warning was entirely unnecessary, easily twisted Hana's arm behind her back (It was a fake name, if these people were anything less than absolutely incompetent). "I've been wondering for days when you would give up on that idiotic cover of yours," he drawled. "I suppose that's the other half of your ambush coming up?" Dismissively, he gave the girl a hard shove and stepped backwards to avoid the blow that the woman posing as her mother attempted to land on him with (of all the damned things) some sort of weaponized parasol. Aiko had to at least give them credit for disguising their weaponry well.

Not all of her companions appeared interested in giving them any slack.

She blinked, and then Sai was astride a gigantic ink tiger, peering down impassively at their fake clients. "You are highly unskilled," Sai informed them. Aiko was mildly surprised to note he was holding a brush between two long fingers. That had definitely not been there a moment ago. Then again, neither had the tiger. "We knew of your deception by the second day."

"Yes, we all knew," Sasuke agreed unconvincingly in an undertone.

'I had no idea.' He felt a little bit of sweat well up. 'I was just about desperate enough for a fight to push this mission to 'combat' status to bludgeon a raccoon to death and claim it was rabid. Better yet, claim Sai was bit by the rabid raccoon and get two birds with one stone. Of course I would have had to put him down. It'd be a terrible shame, but I'm sure Tsunade would understand.'

It was a nice daydream.

To be fair, he'd been stationed on point and hadn't had the chance the others had to actually keep an eye on their clients while they were walking during the day. It wasn't entirely Sasuke's fault that he didn't tally all the oddities and hypothesize that they weren't really dealing with honest civilians.

Aiko huffed, almost absentmindedly blocking four senbon from the kunoichi posing as the couple's daughter."You're a bad liar," she whispered after making sure that their teammates were out of earshot/ preoccupied by fighting. Sasuke flushed. She jerked her head at the young kunoichi who seemed irked by being dismissed so obviously. "Why don't you take that one, Sasuke?"

He managed to regain enough of his composure to give a cocky little smirk and nod. "This'll be easy," he roared, charging the enemy kunoichi as he pulled an oversized shuriken off his back.

Something twitched in her temple. 'I'm not sure why I thought working with Tsunade would calm his temper and dramatic tendencies,' she realized sheepishly. That had been a mistake. But it didn't matter much. Even if he was a bit ostentatious in battle, he was certainly effective.

Despite the way that the inaction felt completely unnatural, she restrained herself and stood back to let their lone genin fight alone. Sasuke was significantly faster than his opponent and easily ducked her next projectiles. She seemed to be a mid-distance combat specialist, which was poor luck against such a fast taijutsu artist like Sasuke. The fight was practically over the second she conceded that she couldn't keep enough distance from Sasuke and stood her ground to swipe at him with a blade hidden under her sleeve. He easily stopped it with his shuriken, using the curved edges to force her armed hand outward. It only took him two hits that seemed to shatter something where they hit—in her shoulder and a rib—to get her to her knees and gasping.

Aiko tilted her head to the side to watch the way he trussed her up in the next six seconds, vaguely impressed. 'Is it disturbing or kind of hot that he's that good at bondage?' Sasuke certainly didn't look as inexperienced as she knew him to be when he easily whipped all-purpose wire around "Hana's" ankles and wrists, topping it off by stuffing a bit of bandage in her mouth to stop her from shouting out to her comrades.

"Finally," Sai muttered, knocking the 'father' out with a blow to the head. Kakashi grunted in assent and seemed to set a genjutsu on the 'mother' that sent her to the ground in a fetal position, quietly weeping. Aiko just rolled her eyes at the boys' dramatics. It really wasn't that big of a deal, and they could have taken care of their opponents without waiting on Sasuke.

That was when the other half of the hilariously undergunned ambush squad (that had probably expected either three Chuunin or one Jounin and three genin) appeared, about a minute after the youngest kunoichi now whimpering through a gag had jumped the gun and made an attempt to take out Kakashi.

They'd probably become very nervous about their mission when they realized they had somehow scored Sharingan no Kakashi on what should have been a routine mission staffed by Chuunin. The girl might have even been right in thinking that she had a slightly better chance getting him from behind while he was preoccupied with obvious hostiles instead of joining in an attempt to overwhelm him with numbers. He was internationally famous precisely because that kind of thing didn't work well on him, after all. Unfortunately for Hana, getting the drop on Kakashi was so spectacularly unlikely that her best option would probably have been to cancel the mission if at all possible. Doubtlessly they would have done so if there'd been any way to contact their comrades.

"Is that who I think it is?" a bulky man wearing what appeared to be a lightning headband asked uncertainly. He was staring straight at Kakashi and looking a bit nauseous.

"Oh, shit," someone said. Two out of the four back-ups for their 'clients' turned directly around and bolted.

They didn't get very far.

"We're not going to kill them," Sasuke repeated flatly, grumpily doing his part to drag their cargo technically over the border.

("That was our mission, after all," Kakashi had cheerily pointed out despite the fact that it seemed apparent their mission objectives had changed. Perhaps he was just mocking their captives?)

For once, it seemed like Sasuke and Sai were on the same wavelength. To be frank, Aiko didn't know what was going on either, but she did assume that Kakashi knew what he was doing. It wouldn't hurt to wait around and find out what he thought they should do.

The man in question dropped Mei on their pile of enemy shinobi with a thump (and a sad "Oof!") and idly poked at one of their captives with a sandaled foot, mussing up his hair and leaving a shoeprint on his cheek. "Well, we get one of these every once in a while," he explained cheerily. "Some village funds a fake mission fishing for a low-level team in hopes of getting a chance to weaken our forces and make off with a bloodline user. We have more clans than any other village, after all." He shrugged. "But our friends here appear to be from Lightning, who we aren't at war with. I know it's idiotic, but Lightning in particular has a history of demanding reparations from Konoha after their poorly-planned attempts at bloodline theft inevitably fail to fool anyone but the thickest Academy students."

Weak killing intent wafted off of someone in the pile of bound and humiliated shinobi.

Aiko clenched her jaw tightly to keep her amusement hidden. He was intentionally provoking them, of course, but he wasn't lying. He was probably referring to the attempted kidnapping of Hyuuga Hinata that had gotten Neji's father killed in the not-so-distant past. At any minute now…

"That makes no sense," Sai observed with textbook predictability, not seeming at all strained by the shinobi draped over each thin shoulder. "Is Lightning often this incompetent?"

Hana visibly cringed.

Yepp. Aiko had been waiting for the peanut gallery to speak up. Kakashi had a knack for playing the boys like a couple of instruments… but probably drums or something, because she just couldn't see him solemnly picking at a shamisen or something like that. Although he would be great if he tried.

Sasuke had picked up the conversational thread as well. "Historically speaking, yes," he snarked.

She turned her face down to Mitsuo (happily licking at an irritated man's face) so Sasuke didn't see her eyes roll. Big talk, from a guy who hadn't noticed the undercover Chuunin in their midst.

Granted, it wasn't that he was stupid, and he had still easily wiped the floor with his opponents which pretty well proved that he was a high Chuunin-level fighter. He just had little practical experience with real civilians that would have clued him in to the oddities in their friends' charade. There had been hints: like the textbook time it took them to begin to display tiredness every day, or the too-inefficient ways that they went about setting up camp at night without ever improving. Come on, civilians were untrained, not stupid.

Kakashi shrugged, walking away without a care. "If we kill them, Konoha will have to deal with repercussions. It's not like it matters. Konoha ninja are far more skilled than these…"

His pause was uncharacteristic. It probably meant he wanted them to jump in. She was happy to oblige.

"inept hacks?" Aiko piped in at the same time that Sai offered, "weaklings?" and Sasuke monotoned, "uncouth plebians?"

Kakashi tilted his head contemplatively. "I was going to say Lightning shinobi, but those terms all equate to about the same thing."

If she hadn't turned around expectantly for the reaction, she might not have seen the pile-up of bound and disarmed Lightning shinobi wilt even further, as if someone on the bottom had given up out of embarrassment.

It was a particularly humiliating situation to be in. Their mission had failed, and they would have to return home unsuccessful, telling their superiors that they had been bested by a single team that hadn't even thought them worth killing. She actually felt a little bad for them—it hadn't been their fault they'd been assigned such a mission. How were they ever going to explain this away without losing all their dignity? She didn't know how much self-respect she'd be able to muster if she'd been stripped to her underwear to ensure she wasn't hiding any more weaponry and then left in a pile on the road, waiting to be found by helpful travelers.

Oh well. That was their problem, not hers, as long as they didn't try to get back into Fire Country.

"It was Sharingan no Kakashi," Ichigo swore, putting a hand over his heart.

"But not just him!" Kenpachi chimed in. "He had a whole ANBU squad disguised as a Chuunin team with him. Our cover must have been broken before we ever got into Konoha."

"Yeah," Mei added sincerely. "You should have seen them! They had an oni with them, one with hair like fire!" She made a face. "A badly dressed oni at that," she muttered in an aside to a blue-haired man who snickered with her.

"Don't forget the man with the massive shuriken," someone added from the back of the group. "Seven feet tall, he was, and blood in his eyes."

"And the last…" Ichigo shuddered. "Half naked boy, pale as paper, and crazy to boot. Kept trying to start fights with his own companions."

"We barely escaped with our lives," Hana added solemnly, staring deep into her hands and looking genuinely disturbed. "They were after us like Inuzuka hounds. If we'd been just a little bit slower…" she dragged a finger meaningfully across her throat.

"Jeeze," the border guard breathed, looking disturbed. "Just… Here, you'd better go in straight away."

"Hard mission?" His partner asked when he returned just in time to see a large group of shinobi in peasant plainclothes stagger into the village.

A bit smug at having gotten the juicy gossip, he nodded vigorously. "I'll say! They just got back from fighting Sharingan no Kakashi and an entire Konoha ANBU squad! One of them had a demon mask and red hair to match!"

The detail was compelling, after all. Konoha always seemed to use animal symbols for their ANBU. What kind of monsters had that team run into?

"Ha!" his coworker scoffed, toasting the weary travelers' backs with his water bottle. "Course they did. What a few ANBU compared to real shinobi? They're good enough for Konoha work, of course, but up here, ninja just come tougher."

OMAKE

Because they did have more than one mission as a group…

"This is ridiculous." The whine was uncharacteristic. But Sasuke had been pushed to the limits. "I mean," he continued, gesturing stiffly, "this is our fourth C-rank in a row that was miraculously resolved before we got there. Once, I can understand. I can even be happy for the village plagued by bears that solved their problem on their own by realizing the bears were only reacting to territory encroachment. The second mission was acceptable as well, even if we still don't know how that missing nin ended up dead before we got there."

"I know, I know," Aiko agreed, irritated. "And this last mission. It was…" She gave a helpless shrug. "It's positively surreal that the leader of those bandits decided he would rather finish his education and work in finance, forever abandoning a career robbing traveling merchants to transition to legally getting their money."

Tsunade snickered. "Tell me about the third one, again? I've forgotten how that turned out."

"We don't talk about the third mission," Kakashi said darkly, fingers tightening on the open book he wasn't reading.

Sai furrowed his brow and opened his mouth to speak.

He was cut off by Sasuke. "We Don't. Talk. About the third mission," he practically hissed.

Poor Sai looked confused. Aiko reached over and patted his hand reassuringly, completely missing the way that Sasuke's eyes narrowed in sheer irritation. He didn't like her being nice to Sai. But he was just so adorably lost in conversations all the time that she couldn't help but want to help him out.

"Your luck as a team is positively bizarre," Tsunade allowed, somehow managing to seem somewhat professional despite the fact that they all knew she was on the verge of cackling at their misfortune. "I can't imagine a shinobi with stranger luck."

Naruto gave a vicious battle-cry, parrying an oversized sword with the ice cream spoon he'd been using when a group of drunks invaded the festival. He was almost glad the pervert wasn't here because he was just so embarrassing. There were only ten guys—he could take 'em.

"And anyways," Tsunade decided, waving a sheaf of papers at the group, "That's all in the past, now. I'm sure that this mission will work out!"

[ravunn]

Assassin’s Creed Settings I Would Really Like To See

Assassin’s Creed is known for putting a lot of thought and detail into the historical accuracy of the different settings of the games, often making them integral to the plot and characters. These are some settings for Assassin’s Creed I’d really like to see down the road, as well as some suggestions for time periods to focus around.

Japan - Shinobi and ninjas! How could they have not capitalized on this already? It would be really interesting to see the late Sengoku period, working alongside Akechi Mitsuhide to assassinate Oda Nobunaga. It would give a bit of a ‘bad guy’ vibe considering how Nobunaga is venerated in Japan, but perhaps it could be a more complex look at the freedom vs control debate of the Assassins and Templars. Nobunaga was seizing power on behalf of the Templars. Something something Piece of Eden and there you go.

Austria - The crux of this game could focus on the real-life assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand by the Black Hand in 1914. You could even argue that this game could set you as a Templar, trying to avoid the inevitable catastrophe if the Archduke dies. The Black Hand assassins could be a rogue faction, broken away from the main Brotherhood in order to not villainize the Assassins. It would provide some interesting insight into how the Assassins and Templars played a role in the modern era. You could have lots of interesting time period cameos and maybe even some callbacks to Syndicate, given the similar time frame.

Spain - I have been itching to see Spain take centerstage in an Assassin’s Creed game for a long time, ever since Italy in Assassin’s Creed II. It would be especially interesting to see the Spanish Empire’s colonialist period of the roughly 1400s-1800s. You could include sailing and confrontations with the native peoples of the Americas, such as the Aztecs. Yes this retreads a little bit of Black Flag, but you could make the focus more about being Spain and the conquistadors. This, of course, gives you plenty of opportunity to portray Hernán Cortés, Doña Marina, and maybe even Christopher Columbus. Alternatively, you could focus more on Spain itself, possibly during the Spanish Inquisition.

Mexico - Similar to the above, except you would play as one of the indigenous people, probably in an earlier time period. It would be very like Origins in that it deals with a long ago time period (probably around 900 AD). It would be really cool to explore Chichen Itza and the ancient architectures before they were super ancient, kind of like with the pyramids in Origins.

India - I know, they already did India in Assassin’s Creed Chronicles, but I don’t feel a little side scroller game does it justice. I think the time period of British India would be more interesting. It gives the Assassin’s a better reason to get involved and fight for freedom. You could interact with Mahatma Gandhi, who perhaps tries to discourage the main character from taking a violent route. You could then later try to protect him from a Templar assassin, Nathuram Godse, but ultimately fail to save him.

France - I know they already did France in Origins, but I’m talking about a totally different France than the French Revolution. I’m talking about Napoleon’s French Empire. You could be part of the battles and eventually assassinate him in Saint Helena. Napoleon was a known fan of Julius Caesar, who was shown to be corrupted by the Order of Ancient back in Origins, so its not unreasonable that Napoleon ended up joining with the successor of the Order.

Australia - I don’t even know when this would be, but how cool would it be to interact with the landscape? The mountains, the plateaus, the barrier reef... You could deal with the animals like crocodiles, dingos, kangaroos, snakes, spiders, box jellyfish, blue ring octopi, and sharks.

That’s all I can think of right now but I’ll add more to the list as I think of them.

[elenathehun]

reading is emotional, part 13

So I read volumes 11, 12, and 13 several months ago, at the end of September, and then real life basically interrupted any attempt to write a reactions summary. So in lieu of that, I'll just pull my initial impressions from a Naruto group chat I participate in:

Jiraiya's intro is horrible - why is he a fan fave again? - but it also overpowers the most important thing in that scene: a foreign seal had been placed on top of Minato's work and was interfering with the original. I mean, wow, so many stories should come from just that. What haven't I seen this utilized by fandom more often? Orochimaru had access to Naruto as a baby, for one.

[One chat member points out that Orochimaru placed his seal on Naruto during the chuunin exam] When did he have time to do that? [another chat member points out that Orochimaru hit Naruto in the stomach to get him out of the way] Is that all it takes to apply a seal? Dammit, that's lame.

Anyway, is it just me, or does it seem pretty clear that Jiraiya was basically MIA in part 1? It doesn't seem as though Sarutobi knew where he was, given that jounin were supposed to report seeing him to command...

Meanwhile, an unstable jinchuuriki is just killing people all over the place - and our one sacrificial jounin is tasked with watching him. Dammit, I forgot how annoying this arc is. There is no chain of command in Konoha. No one seems to know what anyone is doing, ever.

[Chat member asks how Konoha has not fallen apart with no chain of command] I honestly assume ROOT has an actual purpose aside from fluffing Danzo's ego, and that is acting like an actual military. But seriously, nothing about how Konoha is portrayed makes a lick of sense. There should have been teams set to just watching the sand nin, especially Gaara. Jiraiya should have immediately reported for duty to Sarutobi.

Also, it's sort of horrifying how bad a teacher Jiraiya is. I mean, Kakashi is a bad teacher, but at least he never claimed to be good at it. [chat member asks if I'm at the point where Jiraiya throws Naruto off a cliff] Right now he's just trying to help a 12-year-old boy with shit control over his own chakra learn to use demonic chakra instead. In a lot of ways, Jiraiya is actually worse as a teacher, because it's clear that he's able to accurately assess Naruto's weaknesses as a shinobi. He's just uninterested in helping him get better at using his own chakra and not the fox's. I guess I'll have to re-read the early part 2 section, but aside from summoning and the Rasengan, what the hell did Jiraiya ever actually teach Naruto?

Anyway, in the next scene, we get an up-close and personal look at how incompetent Sarutobi was. All these jounin look pretty worried, and for good reason! One of their number is dead, and the Hokage is saying they're going to wait and see. This is a massive disaster in leadership.

Anyway, cut back to the hospital, where Sakura and Ino only show up to play spectator to Lee. It's infuriating. Why even bother having female characters, Kishimoto? I would have found it less insulting if he'd just decided to portray a totally gender-segregated society.

Anyway, I do appreciate that relationship we see between Sarutobi and Anko. I think it's clear that whatever his failures as a leader in the present, he was quite charismatic previously. But god, new leadership is absolutely necessary from a military POV.

...and Jiraiya threw Naruto off a cliff. I think it's safe to say that Tsunade was clearly the best teacher out of the lot of them.

Baki travels back and forth between Sand and Leaf with no chaperone. Because that makes total sense.

And Temari makes the same argument against war and for peace now that kid!Tobirama did 600 chapters later. It's a shame she didn't become Kazekage, but her vagina disqualifies her. [Chat members begin discussing the viability of a Kazekage Temari AU] If Sand's Kages all come from the same family, why the hell would you choose the nutty, psychopathic 12-year-old over his far more stable siblings? I understand it's not a democracy, but there's still an element of choice here. [the chat then considered Kazekage Kankurou] Kankurou's too sensible. Only nutcases become Kage - if half the men in your family had died on the job, you might pass too.

[chat member asks why Jiraiya is so keen on using the fox's chakra when everyone else is adamantly against it] He's an irresponsible weirdo in-universe. Given what we know in part 1, it was staggeringly incompetent: the only other example we see of demonic power is a boy who has killed about a half-dozen people on-screen. The real reason, of course, is that Kishimoto didn't want to do the hard work of developing Naruto's abilities organically, so the unearned superpower it is.

[Same chat member asks how I feel about Sasuke so far] He's not dumb. He actually has a survival instinct of a sort. And call me crazy, but there are a lot of Sasuke = Tsunade parallels there. He's lost literally everything, and there is a deep skepticism of Leaf propaganda that Naruto and Sakura haven't developed yet, and maybe never will. Like Tsunade, he is the scion of a founding clan - the very definition of the insider. That that hasn't saved either of them from tragedy and loss.

Anyway, reading the Neji/Naruto fight was actually the worst because I don't like Neji at all, but Naruto doesn't really deserve to win. Why couldn't Sakura beat Ino in the prelims and then go on to fight Neji? Anyway, I can skim a lot because Kishimoto's fight art isn't very dynamic.

O hai, Kabuto is still at large, still killing ANBU mooks. I definitely have to write the story where Team 7 gets involved with Kakashi's investigation of the mysterious traitor instead of participating in the chuunin exam.

anyway, Naruto shows he has a bit of a brain during Neji's fight. It's a shame this only happens every so often when dictated by the plot, instead of growing organically as part of his character.

What is the point of the Hyuuga? I mean, they have that nifty seal, you'd think the village council would really pressure the main house to ensure the branch members were able to use the entirety of the gentle fist skillset. If I were Danzo, I'd be maneuvering in that direction: hundreds of sealed Hyuuga with the full power of the gentle fist would really augment Leaf's manpower. I can understand the main house keeping the branch house down with superior knowledge of the gentle fist; I can see the main house using the seal to quash rebellion in the branch house; I can't see both, not in a world where the Hyuuga are part of Leaf and have a manpower requisition of some kind they need to fill. Leaf needs soldiers, and deliberately handicapping the ones who serve the village...yeah, if I were Danzo, I would force the issue.

OK, more of Kabuto just wandering around the stands, randomly healing Hinata.

Anyway, time for Neji's monologue. Mostly what I got from this is that Neji actually has no idea what really happened. Apparently, Cloud's Kage came directly to Leaf for the peace treaty, and Hiashi is strong enough to kill a Kage-level opponent. This doesn't even count the fact that the Kage of Cloud is actually in the stands right as Neji is telling Naruto his tragic story. Given that Neji was about 4 when his father dies, that makes sense - he probably cobbled his story together from household gossip.

Anyway, what I got from this is that Gai should have ensured that Neji got the crap beat out of him at least once by a social inferior. This is not the sort of lesson you want occurring during an international event open to the public, and honestly, Neji's overconfidence could have gotten him killed very easily - and not just by his opponents. Talking about Konoha's internal politics in front of outsiders is the sort of thing that involves the secret police...

Anyway, Naruto uses dangerous demonic power to beat up a 14-year-old boy. Jiraiya did not clear his training plan with Sarutobi ahead of time, looking at the unhappy surprise on Sarutobi's face. Also confirmed: the Byakugan can see demonic chakra that is invisible to the regular human eye. Would have been nice to have multiple Hyuuga guards on Gaara, right?

Ugh this Hyuuga bullshit is infuriating. I'm tabling it for another day until I can finish editing my Hyuuga rant post.

Moving on, Raidou's little "shinobi must be punctual" speech makes me think the blatant favoritism we see in canon wasn't appreciated by the Joe Schmoes around Sasuke. Kakashi can do that crap because he's basically been active a million years and is good for it in the clutch, and his co-workers still hate it! Sasuke doesn't have that leeway.

Ah, Shikamaru: one of Naruto's many out-and-out chauvinists.  

Anyway, it's pretty annoying that the matches have been set for a month, but not one of these dumb children bothered to do research on their opponents.

Kishimoto again devolves to show, not tell: Shikamaru is apparently the reason the rather weak Team 10 survived the Forest of Death, although how he did so is never explained. It would have been nice to see it, you know?

Oh, that's right. Shikamaru is a genius, who apparently never does shit unless dictated by the plot. So in real life, he'd be like one of those weird child prodigies who end up hermits in Montana, but this is Naruto, that ain't going to happen here.

The group chat had pretty divergent opinions on the tunnel Shikamaru was using to spread his shadow. For the record, I thought it was a pretty amazing asspull, but that's been my feeling the entire time I've been suffering through this arc, so go figure. I'm still sort of salty about how Shikamaru went from "maladjusted fuckup" to "GENIUS" in the space of one freaking battle. Every time Kishimoto talks about the "ideal chuunin psycho profile", I get an eye tic. In what universe is Shikamaru commander material at this point in canon?

OK, time for Kakashi's dramatic entrance, which is very dramatic.  

@hiruma-musouka proposed a while back that Kakashi is a fundamentally avoidant personality, and I can't stop thinking about canon in light of that. So an alternate reading of Kakashi's tardiness for Sasuke's match - Kakashi was actually hoping Sasuke's match would be forfeited due to tardiness, and Sarutobi's weak will foiled his cunning plan!

Gaara casually kills two mooks in plain sight. Where is Leaf's internal security? The only thing I can reconcile is that the Uchiha did all internal security, and given their deaths and the fact that Leaf still seems to be a largely pre-literate society, no group managed to fill the vacuum afterward.

How has Sasuke gotten so much better in a month of training? I don't care if your fancy eyes allow you to mimic moves and see very fast movement, you still need to build up the muscle to actually go fast yourself!

A moment of silence for the people of Sand, who are so familiar with the Ichibi they can tell right away when Gaara lets it possess him totally.

Those panels where Sarutobi and the "Kazekage" are looking at each other are actually pretty good. Ramps up the tension.

The invasion starts, and there is absolutely no coordinated response from the Leaf-nin.

Anyway, Shikamaru pretending to sleep through the invasion of his village is a massive black mark on his record. Like, God save the Nara clan level of black mark. He's technically an adult, he's the heir, he ought to be representing his clan...him trying to sleep through an invasion is a mark of cowardice, and would have terrible repercussions on his family. This is, in fact, the sort of thing that starts complicated succession disputes.

...and we end on Sarutobi, ready to fight all the time.

Anyway, reading this part of the manga sort of solidified why Naruto is a bad character for me, from a writer/author POV. Naruto spends so much time talking about how he understands the villain's pain. The problem is, Naruto's tragic life history never really shows up as a tangible issue in the plot! He's a lonely kid, but good lord, everyone in Leaf is lonely. People are jerks to him in a general way because he's an orphan and poor and stupid, which sucks but happens a lot in real life too. And even though people are jerks to him, we never really see them be cruel to him because he's got a demon in him. Iruka treats him like a wayward student; Sakura is basically his friend in a few months; Kakashi is a sadsack teacher, but he's not singling Naruto out with his awful teaching, and he does trie to find someone competent to instruct him; Sasuke isn't nice to him, but he's no crueler than the rest of Naruto's classmates. Basically, when Naruto talks about how he feels the villain's pain, I'm very meh. Contrast this to the chick version of Naruto, where lots of little girls beat the shit out of each other in the name of friendship: Nanoha. Fate Testarossa is a deeply tragic figure, and you are really, really, rooting for her to move to a better place by the end of that show. Or geez, just the first two episodes of Michiko and Hatchin, which features some truly awful child abuse.

Anyway, I'll post my long-awaited (?) Hyuuga rant later this week, and then I guess it's back to the old grindstone to try and knock out a reread of Naruto volume 14-16 before the new year begins!

[electraposts]

AIC WHATSIT 25  POSSIBLY

“Please concentrate. I need you to be as precise as possible.”

Sakura tried to neaten her posture, but it was already perfect.

“I didn't know she was following me until she spoke.” Sasuke was perfectly professional. His hands probably weren't clammy at all. “I couldn't visually follow the movement she made.”

“With Sharingan?”

The Sandaime might have been the slightest bit incredulous.

Sasuke's jaw was a little tenser. “Yes, Sandaime-sama. With the Sharingan.” He adjusted his footing every so slightly. “The suspect collided with Gaara-san, and then as far as I could tell, both disappeared.”

“Indeed.” He tapped his fingers on the desk just once. “Please repeat once more her words, with tone and body language as you remember them.”

Sasuke dutifully repeated the conversation for the second time, though this time he neglected to mention that she had mussed his hair afterwards. That was a shame, because it was the best part, as far as she was concerned. Was his hair cute that way?

Was the Sandaime making eye contact with someone behind them? Sakura didn't let herself look. After a moment, the feeling that he wasn't paying them full attention fled when his attention came to rest on her. “You have had the most extensive interactions with Uzumaki-san in Wave, Sakura-chan.” She shook, a little. “Please give me your honest impressions of her at the time, not those you formed with new information after returning to Konoha.”

She took a shaky breath. “I thought she was intelligent, kind, and reliable. I also thought she was frivolous, self-centered, and socially intense.”

“Intense?” The Sandaime raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

Sakura remembered the toothy grin that had not fit Aiko-san's image. “At times, she seemed more affectionate to us than was warranted by our brief acquaintance,” she said slowly. That wasn't quite it, but she couldn't think of a better way to phrase the oddity that had twinged at her. “Or maybe it was disproportionate investment?” she tried. “She expressed concern for our team's well-being and cohesion that doesn't make sense coming from an unrelated shinobi, and pushed the boundaries of reasonable behavior from the civilian she was portraying.”

“Did any particular interaction give you a strong sense that something was unusual?”

She didn't have to think about it long. She'd gone over this in her head more than once, trying to pinpoint anything that would have given away the civilian charade. “The conversations we had the first night,” Sakura admitted. “I'm not sure what exactly struck me as so odd. The conversational content was mostly normal- she asked about our families, gave some compliments, and talked about how she knew Tsunami-san.” She snuck a glance at Naruto. He was looking forward, at the wall.

“The blatantly odd thing was that she was shocked to see Naruto,” Sakura said quietly. She resisted the urge to look at her shoes. “Uzumaki-san dropped her teacup, and then invited him to join us. Not long after, she had a conversation with Tsunami-san in the hallway, addressing her concerns about Naruto's health.”

Sasuke shot her a sideways look with a question. He hadn't read her report, and she hadn't mentioned that aloud.

She avoided making eye contact and put her chin up a little higher.

“I thought Uzumaki-san was just a friendly person when she asked us about our lives and families. But Uzumaki-san is related to Naruto. Somehow. So she was almost certainly more interested in Naruto, and being nice to Sasuke and I to obscure her focus,” Sakura put forward. “She was trying to gather information about him in specific.” She cleared her throat.

That stung, a little. She'd thought... it had felt nice to think that she was someone's favorite. And Uzumaki-san had offered her career advice, not Naruto or Sasuke. That wasn't like Kakashi-sensei at all. She hadn't even seen him since he told her to follow Sasuke during the invasion. Of course, most of the senior jounin were suddenly missing. But she... she didn't think he was dead. Someone would have told her.

Sandaime-sama was already moving on, turning his attention to Naruto. Sakura tore her attention away from her sadness and anxiety and back to the less painful immediate topic.

'Aiko-san didn't care about what I said when I talked about my family. She only asked me questions so that it wouldn't seem odd when she talked to Naruto.'

Of course Aiko-san had asked about family. That would be the reasonable thing to do if she was surprised to see a relative. She had to have recognized him by his features. That probably meant she knew who his parents were? Or that he had a strong Uzumaki resemblance, Sakura decided. Aiko-san hadn't really asked about parents... lack of interest? That strongly fit with the theory that Aiko had recognized Naruto by one or both of his parents.

She stole a glance at her teammate. He did have unconventional features. His coloring was unusual, but it was the shape of his face that was just a bit foreign. Did Aiko-san's face look like his? She strained, but couldn't exactly remember. She needed side by side comparison. If Naruto looked a lot like Aiko-san...

'I probably would have noticed,' Sakura thought dryly. 'I saw them next to each other a lot. So unless Naruto is the only one of the two with distinctive Uzumaki traits, that must mean that it was the parental recognition.'

The really weird thing... if asking about siblings wasn't just idle conversation, then... why would she do that? That only made sense if she thought Naruto should have a sibling, or was invested in knowing if he had one. Or knowing if he knew he had -

Her mouth opened in an O.

She looked up, blinking quickly and trying to catch on to where the conversation had gone. Naruto was still talking to the Sandaime, relating something about his training with Jiraiya and Aiko-san sitting in on it. That was a surprise to her, but it made a sinking kind of sense with the theory she had to get out into the open.

It burst out of her without any decorum. “Aiko-san wanted to know about Naruto's family because-”

“Haruno-san,” a voice snapped out, shouting enough to cover her voice. “Do not interrupt your Hokage.”

She jerked.

A jounin she'd seen around was giving her a stern look. How long had he been in the office?

Everyone was looking at her. She felt her face flush scarlet with embarrassment at her rudeness, but the shame was fighting with the urgency to share her theory. “But,” she tried. “There was – I had a thought.” Her voice piped down to nearly nothing.

“It's quite alright, Genma-san.” The Sandaime was giving her an intense look. His tone was paternal, but she wasn't soothed. “Sakura-chan is a agitated by events, as we all are.” He gave her a smile. “Genma, would you escort her out for a breath of fresh air? I think we could all use a moment. Once you return, I'd like to hear your thought, Sakura-chan.”

Meek and embarrassed, she avoided looking at her teammates and allowed the jounin to lead her out. She'd been so disruptive that she'd been removed from the briefing. That was... she was never going to let Ino-pig know that her temper was still so poor.

“Haruno-chan, let's have a walk,” the jounin- Genma? Genma-san- said, so gently that it was almost certainly an apology for shouting at her. “Have you ever seen the jounin breakroom?”

'Obviously not! Do I look like a jounin?'

She gave him a smile. “No, sir.”

He stuck his hands in his pockets and gave her a grin as he started walking in a way she'd never gone before. It was incredibly goofy. Against her conscious desire, she found her shoulders relaxing a bit.

“You know, I've gotten excited enough to mouth off in a debriefing,” he confided. “It happens.”

Sakura managed a weak laugh and trotted at his left side. “Naruto does it a lot. I'm sorry. I'm not usually like that.”

“I believe it,” he said generously. “Hold up, we better be quiet for a while. You don't want to disturb people working in this area.” He held open a stairwell door for her, but jogged up the stairs fast enough that he passed her again before he reached the exit. He unlocked it by typing a number string in faster than she could see. The door buzzed and he held it open for her. They passed a desk with two senior shinobi who watched them walk by silently.

'This is definitely not a place where I belong.'

She didn't know if she wanted to slink or to try to look confident. She settled for trying to look a lot less interested in their surroundings than she was. It was hard, when they kept passing doors with names she didn't understand and spiderwebbing seals that she wanted to take a closer look at.

“Most of this belongs to offices you've never heard of,” Genma said quietly. “Maybe you'll find yourself in one of them, someday.”

Sakura gave him a polite look to hide her doubt. On the jounin floor? She was talented enough to make chuunin, for sure. But jounin? Probably not.

He chuckled, so her thoughts probably hadn't been as hidden as she'd hoped. “Oh, you might be surprised.” Genma-san opened a sliding down and sauntered inside. She followed a step behind and pulled the door shut automatically.

The room was noticeably warmer than the hallway. It was actually very comfortable. It had big windows and a ring of soft seating. There were three coffee machines crowded onto the counter space, which was somewhat ominous.

“This is the jounin lounge?” Sakura asked, even though she was pretty sure.

Genma-san plopped down in a puddle of light from a tall window. His adam apple moved as he adjusted the senbon in his mouth- when had he put a weapon in his mouth? Ew. “Yupp,” Genma-san verified. He closed his eyes.

He was... a little weirder than she'd thought. Sakura picked a seat reasonably close and sat primly, smoothing her dress over her knees. “It's empty.”

Genma-san snorted. “Sure is. It has chairs, too. Anything else that you spot?”

Sakura pursed her lips, because obviously she had been politely prompting for information about why it was empty and how he'd known that. But... well. It was all above her clearance. So he'd probably understood and chosen not to answer, she reasoned.

“What was it, earlier?” Genma-san cracked an eye open to peer at her. He seemed only mildly curious. “What was so interesting you started shouting over the Hokage?”

She winced at that description, but it wasn't wrong. “We know that Uzumaki-san is related to Naruto,” Sakura started.

All she got in response was a nod and a sort of 'go on,' wave.

She licked her lips. “Uzumaki-san knew Naruto on sight, which implied it was by resemblance. That could either mean a general clan resemblance, or a resemblance to a specific person, likely a parent. She asked about family casually, but was not interested in pushing for details about parents. That implies that she knew who the parent was, because she would have been trying to establish that person's identity if she was trying to figure out how Naruto was related to her.”

Genma-san opened his eyes. He was watching her impassively. Something in her hindbrain twinged a warning that something wasn't right, but she couldn't stop now.

“So she knew Naruto on sight, by his resemblance to a parent.” By this point she was talking fast enough that Iruka-sensei would have asked her to calm down. “She asked about siblings- why would she do that? Either she wants to know if he has them, or she suspected or knew that he has at least one sibling. She seemed surprised that he said no- she actually asked that twice.”

Sakura took a quick breath. “So she really thought Naruto had a sibling and she was surprised to hear that he didn't. So. That probably means that she has strong reason to think he has a sibling. She could just be wrong. But if she's not wrong? She probably knew details about this person, and they're probably older than Naruto. She wasn't trying to find out if this person existed, she wanted either current details or to find out what Naruto knew about this person. And he knew nothing. That's very odd, if he really has a sibling. Why would she know if he doesn't know?”

Sakura knew her pitch was unpleasantly high but the panic of realization was back again. “Because she's the sibling. That's how they're related. She didn't know about Naruto, so when she met him, she wanted to know if he knew about her.”

Sakura stopped, breathing hard. It took her a moment to realize that Genma was giving her only a small, mildly incredulous smile.

“That's...” he shook his head gently. “That's remarkably well-done, Sakura-san.” Genma-san pulled the senbon out of his teeth and twirled it.

She looked at him. “You're not surprised,” Sakura said. “You... had the same idea? Does the Hokage think so too?”

The Jounin let out a whistle.  “Kid, you're going to go places with a brain like that.” He crossed an ankle over his thigh. “But where you're not going is back to that office to share your theory.”

Sakura stared. “That sounds like you're going to kill me.”

Genma-san didn't laugh. “We're investigating the possibility of treason, Haruno-san.” His voice was suddenly, painfully weary. “I hope you understand the serious nature of what you've stumbled upon here.”

Wait, what? Her thoughts were roaring, but self preservation had finally hopped forward to keep Sakura's face blank. Treason? Aiko-san couldn't be a traitor unless she'd been a shinobi of Konohagakure. And surely they would have recognized her if she had been- she hadn't even changed her name.

'Whatever is going on... it isn't Aiko-san who is in trouble.'

“Yes,” Genma-san said. “Consider this your notification that your speculation is classified. Speak to no one, unless the Hokage tells you differently.” He sniffed once and stood up. “I think it's about time to go back, don't you?”

'No one?' Sakura wondered, mechanically following. 'Not... tell no one except your jounin-sensei? Did he just... leave that out? Or if Kakashi-sensei not supposed to know about this? Is that why he didn't come to this meeting- they thought he might think the same thing that I did?'

She didn't say a word. But... by the time they reached the Sandaime's secretary to ask approval to enter, Sakura was concentrating on one question:

'I wonder if Naruto could tell me who his parents are. I thought they must be dead. But the Sandaime wouldn't waste his time investigating possible treason from dead people.'

When the door opened, she saw the Sandaime look at Genma-san too quickly for Sasuke and Naruto to catch. Genma-san did... something fast with his right hand that Sakura couldn't see.

She plastered on a smile.

“Are you feeling better?” the Sandaime asked kindly.

Sakura nodded, and slipped into an apologetic bow to hide her face. “Yes, thank you. I'm sorry. Please excuse me.”

“It's no trouble.” He was making uncomfortably direct eye contact when she lifted her head. “You returned at a good time, Sakura-chan. I was just asking your teammates if they had any questions and concerns?”

Naruto threw his hand up and waved. “The Yondaime!”

“That's a rumor,” Sasuke-kun muttered, leaving off the “idiot”.

“Kiba said Ino said-” Naruto started arguing. She lost interest. She could ask Ino directly and get better information than Naruto would report.

Sakura pressed her lips together and tried not to be too obvious about looking Naruto over. In profile, he was... kind of cute, she grudgingly admitted. In a girly way. Maybe his nose could be a match to Aiko-san's. Was their eye shape the same? She snapped back to paying attention when Naruto broke semi-dignified reporting posture in order to plant both hands on the Sandaime's desk.

“It's not a rumor that you fought the other Hokage, right old man?” He grinned obnoxiously.

Sakura winced.

Her teammate leaned his weight onto the Hokage's desk and let his feet come off the ground. “That's true, right?” Naruto wiggled his butt. She looked away hastily. God, he was so embarrassing!

“Get down, idiot!” Sasuke-kun hissed. He grabbed Naruto's collar and yanked the team disaster back to his feet. Naruto went with a squawk and immediately tried to jab Sasuke-kun in the gut.

The Sandaime watched the tussle with impassive fondness. “That's true, Naruto,” he agreed. He pulled open a drawer and extracted his pipe. “Orochimaru revived past Hokage. However, his control was broken.” He lit up his pipe. “Thank you for coming, team 7. I believe the mission desk downstairs has work for you. After that, please report to the hospital for your check-up appointments. You will be getting a full physical, with x-rays and bloodwork, so be prepared. Goodbye.”

All three genin saluted on reflex. Sakura was halfway out the door before she realized that the Sandaime hadn't answered Naruto's question.

She woke up. Aiko moved slowly, smoothing down the futon cover again and again with her palms to get the wrinkles out. She stood and grimaced at the taste in her mouth. Mission number one was to brush her teeth. The toothbrush was- where had she left the damn thing? It wasn't in the cup to the right of her sink, it wasn't sitting on the rim, it wasn't-

“This is just sad,” Sanbi commented. “You must plan better if you will attempt this lifestyle.”

He was right. Aiko flinched and fed her own restored chakra to the Rinnegan. Her purple toothbrush innocently looked back at her from where it was balanced on top of her face wash.

“Why did I do that?” Aiko frowned and tried not to make eye contact with her reflection as she cleaned her mouth. “That's a stupid place to put a toothbrush.”

“I usually do my best not to wonder,” Sanbi said contemplatively. “Last week, you left it on top of the clothes washer. Also, the lid to the nori that you misplaced last night? It is actually under the sofa.”

That didn't sound right, but she didn't remember well enough to argue. Aiko caught her mirror self's creepy eye and frowned automatically. When she spat out the foam, she conscientiously put the toothbrush into the cup where it was supposed to live. “Stay,” she muttered.

When she made her bleary way out to the kitchen, Aiko paused. It was weird to see someone else there. “Good morning,” she decided. “How was your night?”

Gaara didn't look at her directly. In the clear light of day, the stains and wrinkles on his clothes were apparent, as was the sallow quality of his skin.

'Has anyone taught this child about hygiene?' Aiko wondered. 'He doesn't seem to take care of himself well.'

He needed to be outfitted. She should delegate it- but he was her kid. She needed to take care of him.

She ruffled his hair as she walked past- or she tried to, anyway. She scraped her fingers on a cloud of sand.

She checked Gaara's face. He seemed more resigned than wary or standoffish... She didn't think he'd been the one to push her away. So Aiko raised an eyebrow and slowly, deliberately reached past the slowly churning resistance to run her fingers through his rough hair. Two guesses as to what the grainy texture at the base of the strands was- “You need a bath, little one.” She stepped directly in front of him and pulled her hands back to herself. She made a note to wash her hands- there were old, spare bis of people in that sand. Gross.

'I wonder if I can get him clean sand. Can sand be washed? His sand should be washed.'

Gaara was watching her with slightly narrowed eyes, but he didn't seem to outright reject the idea of a bath.

“After we eat breakfast, I would like for you to shower and borrow some of my clothes. Once you're out, we can go shopping for your personal effects and have what you're wearing now washed.” She waited for a response.

He opened his mouth after a protracted silence. “Fine.”

'Oh my god, he's talking to me.'

She beamed at him. That was the first word of the day, and it was a good one.

“You are alarming that child.”

Aiko toned her grin down to something more dignified and turned to scavenge for breakfast. She filled the rice cooker halfway and turned it on- oh, that was going to take a while... The fridge held 5 eggs, some more cabbage and onion, soy sauce, mirin... Milk. Not much else.

Well then. They were going to eat scrambled eggs with chopped onion and cabbage on top of rice. And then she was going to find more vegetables, because he needed to get on a healthy diet.

Which reminded her...

'I need to contact Konoha and politely remind them that I expect the accommodations for my puppies to include age appropriate amounts and variety of nutrients. None of that gruel bullshit. I'm not doing that to their people.'

Sanbi sighed.

“Breakfast is going to take a while. Let's go find something you can borrow, okay?” Aiko didn't wait for a response. It was enough to know that he followed her to her bedroom and stood in the doorway while she dug through the cheap plastic drawer set in her closet. She scavenged two long-sleeved t shirts. Neither of them really seemed like his style- they were both slightly stretchy material. One was red, the other dark blue. As for pants- The only thing that seemed remotely plausible was a pair of the dark gray uniform pants. They might even be fine- it was the smallest size available. They were a little long on her, but all her height was through the torso. So.... Probably okay?

She held the options up for his perusal. “Can you stand to wear this for a few hours?” She held eye contact until he shrugged.

That was probably the best answer she was going to get, so she shepherded him into the bathroom. “Gaara, please use my shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. Oh, a clean washcloth, just a second...” She pulled her loofah out of the shower and tossed it in the sink. She found a threadbare pink washcloth  in the second drawer, which would do. She held it out until Gaara unfolded his arms to take it from her.

His brow was furrowed.

'Does... He does know how to take a shower, right?' Aiko hovered a moment, unsure. 'He is nearly a feral kid. And from a city with severe water use restrictions. It's... it's pretty possible that he's never used a shower.'

Well then. She stepped into the shower area and glanced back to make sure she had his attention. “This dial adjusts the temperature. I have it at a heat I like, but you can move it to anything. I'll start the water-” she did just that. A gentle rumbling echoed out of the pipes. She took the showerhead off of the hook and angled it to show him the green button underneath. “When you want the water to spray, press this button to turn it on. Press it again to turn it off. When you're done, you can turn all the water off with this lever. If you don't remember, just leave it and I'll get it.”

That... That felt pretty through. Could there be something else?

Um. Towels. She only had two, and one was still damp from her shower before bed. So she pulled the other off the rack and draped it within reach of the shower. “You can use this.” Aiko pursed her lips. “I'll be in the front room, taking care of morning mail, breakfast, and starting a list of supplies we need for the house. If you think of anything, you can add it to the list once you're done. Please take your time- the rice won't be ready for 40 minutes anyway.” She hovered, but that was it. Aiko ran a hand through her hair. “I'll see you when you're done.”

Gaara took a slightly appalling hour in the shower, judging from when the water started to when it cut off, but she wasn't entirely certain he had actually taken a shower until he padded around the corner with soggy hair, wearing both of her shirts at once. They were soaked around the neckline.

She did not sigh. She got up, found a big, soft kitchen towel, and gestured him into the tiled room. He came, frowning slightly.

“I want to dry your hair, okay?”

Gaara looked as though he was considering commenting, but settled for a nod. It was just like when she'd hugged him: he started off stiff and aloof, and relaxed in bits and pieces until he was actually leaning his head back into the towel. It was with slight regret that Aiko finished and pulled the cloth away.

She managed to get him fed and tug him out the door within fifteen minutes. The workday was starting around them- genin and chuunin were reporting to the missions office, and scattered civilians were taking their bleary-eyed walks to the fishing docks or construction sites.

'The stores are not open at this hour.'

Aiko felt slightly stupid.

“It's earlier than I realized,” Aiko eventually admitted.

Gaara probably thought that his reaction was subtle, but even in her peripheral she saw him steal a quick glance at her.

“Let's go to my office. It's still closer to the shopping areas, anyway.”

When she walked in, chuunin scattered. Saito was presiding over the office staff as they began hauling the day's mission scrolls to the front desk. She gave Aiko only the briefest of glances, but a coltish genin hauling the enormous master binder of staff looked incredibly alarmed to see her.

'You'd think it would not be a surprise that the Mizukage is occasionally in the Mizukage's office.'

Sanbi huffed. “Very occasionally, as it were.”

Dickhead. She had other things going on, alright?

She pressed her lips together sourly and walked past. The clock in her office claimed it was 6:34. When a frightfully thin genin with light brown hair brought in a tray with coffee at 6:39, Aiko was reading details on the construction report for the repaired bridge. She tried to make eye contact and smile, but the boy ducked his head and set the coffee on her desk as far from her as possible.

Gaara watched this happen, perfectly still on the straight-backed chair across from her desk.

Aiko resisted the urge to sigh. “Thank you,” she said. “I need a few things. First off, let's add a cup of tea to my morning order whenever Gaara-kun comes with me to the office. Secondly, tell Saito-san that I'd like to locate a couch and a short table for the back wall, as soon as is reasonably possible. And when Mira-san comes in, she should have a list of medical personnel in the village. I want that list fleshed out with contact information and someone to guide me to each address on the list. I want to tour every clinic and hospital today, preferably before 3pm.”

He repeated the orders silently back, mouth moving.

That was... well. A bit unusual, but okay. Aiko waited patiently.

The genin blinked rapidly and then nodded. “Yes.” He tapped his fingers against the now-empty tray he'd brought her coffee on. 3 taps, 5 taps, 3 taps, and then he forcibly stilled his fingers. “Will that be all?”

“Yes.” She managed a smile, because she was starting to suspect that his ticks had nothing to do with her. “Goodbye.”

He left without further comment, which was oddly funny for a reason she couldn't put it in words.

Aiko shook it off and went back to her reading. Gaara had initially turned down all offers of entertainment, but after about an hour he drifted to look at the bookshelves on the wall. When she set down the last invoices for the dock materials, he was a good twenty pages into a book of Kirigakure's political history.

'I need to read that one,' Aiko remembered, slightly guiltily. She knew what Konohagakure cared to teach, but it probably wasn't the same or as detailed.

Ah well. It was nice to see the tension off of Gaara's face. He seemed more peaceful than she'd ever seen, with a boring book and the second teapot of the day set by his side.

He looked up and caught her smiling at him. Gaara frowned instinctively. But after a moment, he seemed to deliberately wipe the negativity off of his features and give her a nod.

She nodded back and then pulled out Mifune's letters again to reread them and implant the details into her memory. Then she drafted a letter to Konohagakure.

At 9, she took Gaara out for the basic supplies of clothes and toiletries and groceries. He was completely disinterested. She gave up on getting his approval for most things and simply picked out a combination of the practical and the whimsical. He didn't seem to have any interest in decorating his room, but it was just too bleak to leave without anything personal. It might have been too ambitious, but she had a small bookshelf and a miniature table added to the huge order to be brought to the house and assembled while she was at work. Hopefully he would find something he wanted to put on them... But just in case he didn't, she picked out a few potted plants of various sizes.

In mid-morning and the early afternoon, she spent her time touring small clinics and checked in on the main hospital. She took her masterlist of persons and places with her and made notes of impressions and facts after each encounter. She left swirling eddies of terrified and confused medical workers in her wake, but that couldn't really be helped. It was going to take time for the general populace to feel safe around a Mizukage. In the meantime, she had work to do.

They needed everything, frankly. They needed more doctors and nurses, they needed better training, more and better medicine, more and better facilities and equipment. The project would have to be approached in starts and stops, but it had to be started.

She called in the man whose half-remembered name started with “Yama” and had a meeting about the contents she needed him to draft in proposals and letters to Mifune. Gaara watched on with surprising engagement for a 12-year old. Granted, he was a 12 year old who would have become Kazekage by 14 in another world, so maybe she ought to be making a concerted effort towards furthering his education with the assumption that he had political ambitions. The meeting ended at 3, at which point she took the time for a good, long stretch and surreptitiously found out that her assistant's full name was 'Yamagi'.

'After lunch, I need to make a chart of my administrative personnel and make sure I know who is reporting to whom, so I can make any changes necessary and keep bad combinations apart.'

Oh. After lunch, huh. That should have been hours ago.

“I'm hungry,” Aiko said, in a tone of realization. Had she... She looked at her ward guiltily. “Gaara, I forgot to feed you. Are you hungry?”

He gave her his full attention. “I am not a cat.”

Well, yeah. She was aware of that. Cats could feed themselves.

'It's time for a break.'

Aiko stood up and laced her fingers over her head, reaching as far up as she could reach. She felt the stretch down her sides and shoulderblades. “Let's take the afternoon,” she said. “A late lunch, and some kind of outing. There's a library I want to visit, and we could see a park, museum, go for a run or do some training- what do you like?”

Gaara just looked at her, as thought he had no idea what to do with this question.

She swallowed. “I'll pick lunch, and you can think on that while we eat.” She crossed the room to pull open the door and call for her secretary. Mira-san came instead, holding what must be the finalized copies of mission reports from the first shift, ready for her notarization and pending filing.

Aiko felt oddly guilty for saying it, but- “I'll be out of the office for several hours. I'll return between 6 and 7.”

“You have a meeting with Terumi-san at 6:30,” Mira said sternly.

She gave the older woman a look, raising her left eyebrow. “I'm aware,” Aiko said simply. She held out a hand. After a moment, Mira passed over the binder. “Thank you. That will be all.”

She locked up the office from inside. Gaara watched, apparently disinterested. When she held out her hand to him, however, he grabbed it with enough force to turn her fingers white and that somehow turned into something that was almost a hug. Aiko smoothed down his hair with her free hand and did not comment on the desperate force with which he pressed his head into her collarbones. She had meant to hiraishin them away quickly, but she ended up just holding him until he started to lean his head away.  

Aiko took them to Grass.

Gaara stepped away quickly in the sunshine, but he didn't pull his hand free. So she kept hold of it. They walked down the city streets of an area she was only passingly familiar with until they found a cafe that looked half-decent. Aiko picked a soup, salad, and sandwich meal with coffee, but Gaara seemed more comfortable with more traditional, home-styled offerings. He ate all his tsukemono- he liked sour and bitter flavors, then?- and the soup and broiled fish, but he left a good portion of his rice.

The libraries in Grass's civilian capital were impressive stone buildings, haughty and dark against the skyline. Gaara drifted along behind her while she collected a few things from the architectural college's library, one tome from the medical college's building, and then finally perked up when she went to the general library. She glanced down at him, fussing with the canvas strap of her bag. It was digging into her shoulder from the weight of the books inside, but she could fit a few more things.

“Anything you want,” Aiko promised lightly. “I'll be at that table reading. Why don't you have a look around? Pick at least one book out. You can take more, but I'll be coming back next week. So you can always get something else then.”

True to her word, she set to reading in the enforced quiet of the public areas and let him explore without her hovering or guiding. He didn't go far, which was a little saddening, but it did make it easier to keep an eye on him until she got too immersed into what she was reading about foundations and frames.

'I should have listened to Yamato more,' she regretted. 'Over the years, he's told me a lot offhand. I wouldn't be starting off with so little understanding if I'd paid attention.'

She definitely couldn't ask him now- not about architecture in general, and certainly not for clues about how to improve and use her Mokuton. Obito had been right that she could use it, and with a lot more stamina than Yamato. But her control was just sad. She needed a lot of practice, and she needed a lot more understanding of what she should be trying to do.

Pursuing it as a side project was the best solution. Using Mokuton would drastically increase speed and decrease costs associated with importing materials and skilled labor. There was minimal danger in commissioning Yamato for many of the building projects. But some things were in areas where he couldn't be trusted, or would need to have secret floor plans, and definitely couldn't afford to have any of the deliberate weakness that he might be tempted to plant.

She knew Yamato. He was not going to rig an orphanage or footbridge to fall. But he would sabotage government buildings, and bring back information about important locations of food and water supplies, of electrical lines and other such infrastructural weak points.

Gaara was sitting beside her with a closed book on the table in front of him when she looked up. She checked her watch compulsively- 5:30.

They still had some time, then. She tapped her fingers on the table and smiled at him. “Is there anything you want to do?” She held out her hand for his book, intending to put it with hers.

Gaara put his hand on it and slid it away from her. His bony hand covered the title protectively.

Aiko blinked. “Sorry. I wasn't trying to take your things. I just thought I'd carry it for you.”

He looked at her heavy canvas bag and then away. Stubborn baby.

“Let's get you your own book bag,” Aiko decided. She stood up and headed for the checkout counter, relieved that he followed. “And then?”

She didn't actually expect him to answer. So it was surprisingly thrilling to hear him say, “What kind of museum?”

They used her forged library card to check out all the books like the criminal she was, found him a dark blue bag in a store meant for the university students, and then used their remaining half an hour in a museum detailing the history of the local castle and the series of clans who had inhabited it. She thought Gaara might actually want to see the castle- she promised him that they would do that when they returned the next week.

There wasn't, like, an official tour or anything. The castle was still inhabited. But they were shinobi, they could break in.

'Or I guess I could request it, as the Mizukage?' she vaguely considered. Probably not. That would complicate things. Sometimes it was better to ask forgiveness than permission. It was best to just be so sneaky that no one would know they'd been by.

Her office was just as she'd left it, but when she unlocked the door, she found a couch in the hallway immediately outside. Aiko poked her head out and looked around- there were some other small additions further down: a table, a vase with flowers, a lamp, some small pillows. Huh. That was good service. When she began hauling items in, Gaara assisted without comment. She was walking backwards with one end of the couch when Mei entered the area. The older woman raised an eyebrow, but she swooped in to help Gaara without comment.

“Good evening, Mizukage-sama,” Mei said. “May I be of further assistance?”

Aiko walked past to grab the lamp and set it on the table. Gaara was already putting the pillows on the couch. “No,” she said, belatedly. “I don't think so.” She paused. “Ah, did you submit a request for refreshments on your way in?”

“No. I will do so immediately. Coffee, and....” Mei let her voice trail off, looking at Gaara implacably.

He looked at Aiko. She nodded, trying to prompt him to speak for himself.

“Water will be fine,” he said.

She resisted the urge to tell him he was doing a very good job. He probably wouldn't respond well to that. Instead, she just nodded and dithered for a moment over where she should sit. She'd like to sit with Gaara on the couch, but... that seemed more appropriate for less relaxed times. This was an informal meeting with Mei, but Mei was not her friend.

Aiko sat behind her desk and gestured Gaara to the couch so that Mei could take the seating he'd been haunting all day.

When Mei returned, she expressed no more curiosity about Gaara than she'd demonstrated last night, at their longer discussion at Aiko's home. At first, Aiko noticed Gaara listening intently to their conversation. But it was truly boring stuff- dossiers on possible diplomats, information of Hunter-nin and Black-Ops procedural minutia- and after a while he began alternating between his library book and taking neat, deliberate notes on a pad of office paper. She needed to get him notebooks, then.

After Mei left, Aiko took the piles of paperwork with her to the couch and did her reading and stamping there. Mira-san had gone home, as well as most of the day staff. But one of the skeleton crew waiting for the last mission reports of the day trotted in and out, bearing coffee and water and tea. When asked, they went out and returned with steaming curry for dinner. She and Gaara ate there, as the sun went down and drafts of various letters and proposals were sent in for Aiko's approval at the end of the office day. Before 8, all of her in-going correspondence had been dealt with, reports read, requests for the following day filed, and the changes to her schedule approved. She led Gaara out past the front desk as security came by to lock the building for the night.

It was dark. Like, really dark. The city lights weren't on yet- it hadn't been prioritized. But there were some lanterns burning in attempts to entice customers into the few restaurants open, and ambient noise that kept the city from being too creepily empty.

At home, it was something of a relief to see that the genin team she'd had take her things home had done a nice job with putting away groceries and filling up Gaara's bedroom and adding his toiletries to the bathroom. Someone had even added some things of their own volition- she'd need to find out who was responsible for realizing she was out of floss and replacing it. That was thorough and thoughtful.

'I wonder what dad is doing in Konoha.' She curled up on a cushion in front of the in-ground firepit without lighting it. 'The Sandaime can't possibly trust him yet. Will he reach out to Naruto right away?'

Would Naruto even deal well with that? Would-

“However interesting those troubles, you do not have the leisure time to struggle with them. You have many fascinating problems of your own. Shall I list them?”

'You're a mediocre and mean turtle.'

There wasn't much heat in the insult, because he was right. She needed to remember that she served Kirigakure's people, not Konoha's. She didn't have to be cruel, but she couldn't waste away resources and energy that her people needed.

“Gaara,” she managed. She didn't have to look over to know he was paying attention. “Do you have any ideas about what you would like to do? You don't have to do any kind of shinobi work for us- it's probably inadvisable unless you decide you don't want to return to Suna at all. But you should probably be contributing while you're staying here. It sort of looks like nepotism if I have everyone but my kid helping out, you know?”

It took nearly a minute for Gaara to decide to come closer. Aiko reflected that he walked like a cat: near silent, and with an aloofness that said his chosen path had absolutely nothing to do with anyone else who might be in the room.

“Apprentice,” he said.

Aiko actually turned to look at him so he could fully appreciate the way she was contorting her face. She didn't know what emotion it was conveying, but it was definitely moving in an interesting way. “I would like clarification.”

“I'm going back to Suna.” Gaara's lip curled, and teeth peered out. “Eventually.”

She waited.

He seemed to think that was enough.

It was not enough. “That's your choice,” Aiko said as patiently as she could manage. “Weird, but okay. Who are you apprenticing to and why? Or are you asking for an apprentice?”

“You.” The word was spat out, to get it out of the way as quickly as possible. “You're like me, but they listen to you. I need to be able to do that as well. Show me how to make them respect me. I'm the only one Sunagakure has who is strong enough to lead.”

She leaned back on her cushion and braced her weight on her palms. “That sounds like the opposite of what I asked for,” Aiko countered. “I asked how you might contribute to Kirigakure, you're saying that you want a lot of my time and attention.” She shook her head, feeling the weight of her hair swaying behind her. “Make it worth my while, and we can talk.”

Gaara crossed his stick-thin, anemic arms, ad tried to look tall. “Kirigakure will benefit from competent leadership in Sunagakure.”

“Probably. How can you know you'll be a competent leader?”

He scoffed. “Is it your teaching abilities that you doubt, or my capacity for learning?”

“I doubt a lot of things,” Aiko rebuffed. “The time and attention I can dedicate to your education, your emotional capacity to bond with civilians, the likelihood that Sunagakure's citizens are going to react as Kirigakure's have, and yes, my ability to teach you to govern given that I have a style you are not suited to, and I'm making shit up as I go.” She paused. “Constantly,” Aiko stressed. “I don't know what I'm doing. I can't teach you how to manage a city because I'm still learning. I encounter a problem, I seek out information and attempt to predict future problems and work to preempt them. I can teach you how I think and problem-solve, but I can't teach you how to do that job.”

“My current skill-set is killing people,” Gaara said flatly. “Whatever you have to teach me can't make me worse.”

That was just untrue, but sort of sweet in naivety. “I could teach you about-” Aiko stopped, remembered how young Gaara was, and frowned. “There's a lot I can't teach you about. But fine. I'll consider your proposal with a trial period.” She pulled her hands onto her lap and leaned forward. “You work for me, now.”

“How long is this trial period?” Gaara asked.

She tilted her jaw up. “As long as it needs to be.”

“That's not good enough.” He was turning a bit red, pupils dilating in the darkness. “I can't be away from Sunagakure indefinitely, nor can they mistakenly think me a traitor.”

They held eye contact. Aiko kept waiting for him to turn away or change expression, to either back down or become aggressive. But he just matched her stare.

She cracked a smile. “Fair enough.” She gave him a half-bow. “It's a deal, then. I'll make sure that doesn't happen. I will either accept or reject you as an apprentice within a month.”

He took a moment and then bowed uncertainly. “Uzumaki-shishou?” Gaara asked. “Aiko-sama?”

Both of those were weird and markedly more responsible and adult-sounding than she felt, but one was significantly less weird to hear. “Aiko-sama,” she confirmed. Ugh. So weird. “We are both going to be learning on our feet, Gaara. Tomorrow I want you to accompany and assist an architectural specialist. I think that your sand could be very useful for his construction project. Demonstrate your abilities, learn from him. I'll expect you in my office at 4pm for a detailed report of his thoughts and what you've understood.” She stretched. “I'll have someone take you to him at 8 tomorrow morning. Be ready to take direction.”

If she'd told that to Sasuke at that age, she would have gotten a sneer. Naruto? Whining. But Gaara only nodded.

It was a little unnerving. But she went about her night as if she wasn't bothered by the compliance. She answered some letters, sent an updated set of orders to the third border post with a courier, and showered before bed. Even in the hot water, she couldn't relax. Eventually she gave up and wrapped her towel around her body and laid on top of her sheets. The damp towel and her sopping her made her cold and uncomfortable.

“I really should hang this towel up so that it dries,” Aiko said to herself. But she couldn't find the energy to move, even to unwrap the towel and push it off the bed. Whatever. She closed her eyes, dreading everything. She let the Rinnegan sleep.

Some of the tenseness in her neck washed away with the sinus pain she hadn't exactly noticed building over the course of the day. She stared bleakly into the darkness for a while. There was a pressure in her chest. It wasn't like something sitting on her body. It was like there was something small and hard pushing outwards inside of her breastbone, trying to open up a space to contain... something. Anything.

It was difficult to muster the give-a-damn to finish getting ready for bed, when her body felt so heavy and tired. Eventually, she contorted enough to reach her fingers along the wall along her head and flip off the lights. It was hard to know how long it took for her to fall asleep.

[dryades-angeli]

Why I think that Ajisai is completly bullshit

Since I have a Deviantart account that deals with the female part of Chikushodo and I wanted to do something after years in this regard, I began to take a little interest in Chikushoda's history. The last thing I knew was that she did not have one and that's why I started to develop something about it. I was accordingly frustrated when I found Ajisai.

Because I am a manga reader and did not completely follow the anime, this fillerepisode or these fillerepisodes apparently went through the rags. If the character had been great, it would not have frustrated me so much, but I really do not like anything about her. 

Let's start with the design: You can see here how the corpse is carried away. Am I mistaken or are the strands of hair not flat and turned inwards? And is not the hair color clearly brown?

Maybe I'm wrong, because the light looks relatively reddish, but in this picture you can see it again.

Brown, red, but not a colorful violet, blueviolet to be exect.

So why the heck they chance the Haircolor in their own Anime? Most of all, at the beginning of the episode, her hair does not look that way, but rather reddish-brown or lilac-brown for my sake.

Here it is at least a bit like the original. Although the hue is really very reddish and thus encapsulates itself from the original. But here I like Ajisai reasonably.  But why did they make this out of it?

Completely different hair color, the color of the outfit they have changed. It looks like this person does not have a breast. Even at Sakura you can still see a rounding.

And the question is, why are the hairs the way they are? the long hair stands miles away and the upper hair is flat on the head. Why? - I ask myself. Even the Hairstyle in the Manga don´t look like that.

If they tried to imitate this hairstyle, they did it pretty badly. Then they should have stayed with the hairstyle in the anime. So it's just confusing. The middle strands of hair between pony and lateral strands of hair have completely omitted, too.

What I still wonder how old Ajisai was when she died. As I said, I have not seen the episode, except for small clips from Youtube. During the Chu-Nin qualifying exams, she looked very young and as a body of Pain's rather mature. The Wiki article said that she died before she could become Chu-Nin.

If she was the same age as Tenten, she was only 15 years old and that's what she looks like. Chikushodo looks more like a woman. I think she was at least 18 years old, if not older. The Chu-Nin selection exam is held twice a year. Either she died in the half-year waiting period, but then Pain has a damn good cooling system or she was so bad that she could never have been Chu-Nin. But then I wonder why Konan trusts her with a spy task.

Let's get to the facts: It was said, that she´s a Ninja from Ame-Gakure and that he get an orden from Konan to look after Jinjurikis and extraordinary Shinobi. Also, the Wikia says she seems to share Pain's views. Wuestion: Why is she wearing as his follower, no crossed-out headband? As far as I know, everyone on Pain's side has a crossed-out headband. Surely there would have been problems with entering other villages, but I do not quite understand the meaning behind the order. When Neji and Co. became Chu-Nin, Naruto traveled with Jiraya. And why was it important to find extraordinary Shinobi? Of course, Konan does not know that the Jinjuriki is not even in the village. But it did not really add anything to the story's content, other than portray Ajisai's loyality to Pain. And now I wonder why? I mean, the other body pains were not loyal servants either, but some shinobi. And why does Konan entrust a layman with such a task? First of all, how did Akatsuki identify the Jinjuriki of the other villages? Do not Zetsu or other Akatsuki for spining activities actually exist? This scene makes no sense in my eyes.

The other thing I just do not like ... Jiraya has recognized in the bodies of Pains any Shinobi he once met. Sure, Team Guy and Pain narrowly missed each other, but the corpses of the other paths will surely be left over, they could have been identified and this scene never actually happened (clarifies me if it's different). And if she was a participant in the Chu-Nin eligibility tests, Konoha would certainly have been able to identify her. Although I have to say that you made good use of this time gap between the team meeting and the relocation. In general, I did not like Chikushodo to meet our heroes, but that's a matter of course.

[pod7]

Summer Anime* 2017 Lightning Review

*Just the shows I watched, of course

I’m leaving out shows that I dropped, so if you remember me talking about a show but it’s not listed here, I was either bored by it or just didn’t enjoy it anymore after a certain point, and that’s really all there is to say~!

Shows Included: 18if, Action Heroine Cheer Fruits, Aho Girl, Boku no Hero Academia 2nd Season, Centaur no Nayami, Classroom of the Elite, Clione no Akari, Gamers!, Hajimete no Gal, Isekai Shokudou, Kakegurui, Keppeki Danshi! Aoyama-kun, Knight’s & Magic, Koi to Uso, Made in Abyss, Nana Maru San Batsu, New Game!!,  Nobunaga no Shinobi: Ise Kanegasaki-hen, Pokemon Sun & Moon, Princess Principal, Teekyuu 9, Tenshi no 3P!, Tsurezure Children, 

Reminder that there are spoilers in the reviews below

18if I didn’t quite get what they were trying for with this show until about half-way through. This felt like more of an excuse to explore and experiment stylistically than to actually tell a story at most times, but because of that it got to tell lots of varied and unusual-for-anime stories, including an episode exploring the culture of the hearing impaired/deaf population of Japan, which was really cool. The ending just ended up being kind of wank, but since there wasn’t really that big of a reveal set up, it wasn’t that disappointing. If you want to see some interesting visual styles and some cool Twilight Zone style reveals, you might give this show a shot. 7/10

Action Heroine Cheer Fruits This was quietly one of the better shows of the season. It had the same framework story-wise as Love Live; girls end up banding together to save a building from being demolished and help support the town by buying into the newest fad sweeping the nation. Only instead of idol groups, it’s “local heroes”, live stage shows portraying sentai and superhero like characters beating villains with the goods and virtues representing the town they’re from. The girls are all really cute, even the really cliché ojou-sama~ Shimura had her moments. I will also give this show all the praise in the world for not only including a handicapped character but also making her a central figure to the plot. The ending of the finale where she is included in the show after working behind the scenes for so long tugged on my heart strings a bit. Plus, there is a not so vague relationship between Misaki and Roko, with Roko probably being my favorite character in the show. It’s not as moe as Love Live and the comedy isn’t as quality as something like Yuru Yuri or Wakaba Girl, but it’s still a great show. 9/10

Aho Girl The comedy reminded me of a mixture of Saiki-kun and Plustic Nee-san; very off the wall slapstick kind of stuff, but still really clever and you could tell there was a lot of love put into this show. I don’t know that I would say I laughed the most while watching this show this season (more on that later), but I would say it’s the comedy of the season for sure. Was really easy to forget the episodes were only 12 minutes long because it was just jam-packed with gags. Definitely a must watch for 2017. 10/10 Boku no Hero Academia 2nd Season I definitely feel like the girl characters are getting more screen time in season 2, which is always good. I still don’t see what people see in Bakugo, even after reading ahead in the manga, I don’t feel like his attitude is “redeemed” or “explained” much at all. Hero Killer Stain definitely stole the show; he’s so grungy and RAW, and Go Inoue delivers Stain’s final lines so passionately he almost had me convinced he was the real deal. Like I said earlier, I’ve read ahead, so some of the moments to come are exciting, but there are also some that I can feel will take up waaay too much time, or even have filler put in, which I’m not looking forward to as shounen manga stretches things out enough as it is. Will certainly get another season, it’s so popular it would be stranger for it to not get a third one. 7/10

Centaur no Nayami It’s been a while since I have read the manga, but I feel like they got many of the voices down exactly the way I imagined them. However, it also felt like there was a lot of stuff that was anime-original, or at least were out of order. As much as I can remember, this was the only anime this season with a confirmed-in-show homosexual couple, and while the explanation to the kids in the scene left a lot to be desired, considering the overlying theme of “zero-tolerance tolerance” towards discrimination, felt kind of odd, and felt like maybe the studio made it a little more conservative than it was in the manga. It was a shame that a lot of the everyday life moments from the manga were cut out in favor of more tropes per minute. What I’m trying to say is that while the show is good, it isn’t the best representation of the manga that it could have been in my opinion. 8/10

Classroom of the Elite This show was almost trash, but was saved by the revelation of Ayanokoji’s true self at the very end. Right as Horikita is seemingly spilling her tsundere guts out to him as well. This, in a similar vein to Kakegurui, was really unintentionally comedic to me. There was zero tension at all, mostly because you could see where it was going in most cases. I think it was a bit cheap to have the solution to how Ayanokoji would win the survival test come from a rule they never mentioned about the classes losing points for guessing other class leaders wrong. It would be like having a multiple choice question A/B/C/D and then saying the answer was E. I also think Kushida was a dud. Every time she tried to buddy up or get closer to Ayanokoji, I kept waiting for him to say “At the risk of you blackmailing me again, I agree.” Especially when she asked him who would he choose between her and Horikita it’s like... gee, do I pick the super effective mark I just procured or the girl who has blackmail on me and is asking me this? I wonder... A show that thinks very highly of itself unjustly. 5/10 

Clione no Akari This was kind of bizarre series; it was pretty obvious from the beginning that a certain character would die or was already dead. It felt like a series aimed at like 10 year olds, in an effort to teach them about bullying through entertainment. I don’t really have much to say about it, it had an obvious message with a miserable ending, I’d say pass on it. 5/10 Gamers! I’m not as enamored with this series as most people seem to be, but it has it’s charms to be sure. Karen and Aguri are really great, and in a close third Uehara-kun, but I’m not a fan of Chiaki and Keita, which is kind of bad considering they are the ones we’re meant to be rooting for. I was also pretty shocked at how well received this was considering it is almost entirely a love-pentagon rom-com; any other series with a love triangle or more seems to be met with “ugh, why does this shit have to be in here.” I suppose if it’s meant to be poking fun at the trope as a whole, then I can see it, but if that’s the case then it was so blunt I immediately dismissed it as being too likely to be the case. Karen is probably my fav in the show, and I was kind of annoyed that the rest of the actual game club didn’t really show up much at all despite the early hype for each member. Aguri is a late favorite, mostly because of how she was in the finale; a person who genuinely doesn’t understand the appeal of video games but is still willing to hang out with gamers and tease them about gaming’s darker sides. 8/10 Hajimete no Gal This was basically what I thought Galko-chan was going to be, but it also had it’s own uniqueness to it. The show knew what it was, and didn’t take itself too seriously, but wasn’t a slouch either; it made an effort to make the characters get to know each other and come together somewhat organically, considering how big the cast was. Obviously I’m drawn to Eri Kitamura’s Ranko; the misunderstood childhood friend with a gay crush on her best friend beating up any guys that try to get in her way is something I can get behind as a protagonist, let alone a side character. I think this show is actually more interesting censored than uncensored because they did it creatively and on-theme instead of just mysterious beams of light or clouds of steam. A fun show if you don’t mind sex comedies. 9/10

Isekai Shokudou The “comfy” show of the season to be sure. A great lesson in evolving narrative as well; it starts of with seemingly one off stories each week, but begins to intertwine the stories of the patrons that come along, which was done quite well. The only real problem with it is that, it’s called a western restaurant multiple times in the show, but almost everything they serve is Japanese; it was a real missed opportunity to introduce food from around the world to the Japanese audience, who would be able to relate even more to the bewildered fantasy characters coming to eat every seven days. That being said, if you just want to relax and enjoy something really just pleasant, or need to make yourself hungry, too, this is the show for you. 10/10 highly recommended 

Isekai wa Smartphone to Tomo ni It’s kind of a misleading title, to be honest; it’s meant to convey how powerful his smartphone is in this new fantasy land devoid of most technology, but it’s actually more that God gave him affinity to all elements that makes the protagonist so OP. If that wasn’t enough, he can also learn all null magic, which is meant to be like character specific spells... He doesn’t even have to be taught them, he just have to read about them in a book and he can use it, which is crazy ridiculous in any other show, but because you are expecting him to be over-powered from the start, it’s actually quite enjoyable, in my opinion. The harem stuff was tedious but at least they acknowledged that a) in a medieval setting and time period polygamy being normal makes sense and b) protagonist is still holding on to his previous world and life’s customs of monogamy, and won’t commit to marrying all of them, not yet, anyway. I don’t know that I’d watch a second season of this to be honest. It would have to go one of two ways; either an actual challenge shows up, or he ends up similar to One Punch Man, and begins working on a way to go home or something. 8/10

Kakegurui I said earlier that Aho Girl is comedy of the season, but that I didn’t laugh at it the most this season. This show (and another) would be the reason behind that. I don’t know if I’m just too jaded for it or what but the fact that this show was billed as “psychological” slays me. How anyone could take any of these characters or situations seriously, in the most obvious hentai setting on the planet, is beyond me. The style and animation was all ready pretty and well done, as were the expressions. It’s hard not to compare it to Prison School visually. My main complaint would be that Yumeko isn’t fleshed out enough; they tried to make her this force of nature type character but so was the student council president, who was far more mysterious (naturally), so she just ended up feeling underdeveloped. Since this probably won’t get a second season, I would have liked for the finale to be more in jeopardy by having the second to last episode end with the “president” denying Yumeko’s challenge with a smile, which would have been devastating to Yumeko. If you would like an edgy version of over the top characters rivaling the Phoenix Wright series that take themselves a bit too seriously, you might give it a watch. It’s hysterical. 7/10

Keppeki Danshi! Aoyama-kun I’ll be brief about this one; it’s basically Sakamoto Desu ga, Tanaka-kun wa Itsumo Kedaruge, and DAYS!! mixed together. Make of that what you will. I loved the coach and the girls’ basketball star character. 7/10

Knight’s & Magic FINALLY another mecha show I can get into! Just had to make it wizardy and junk, I guess. Another show this season where the protag is OP and it ends up being just fine, honestly. A slight complaint would be that they bother to mention how much time passes between scenes multiple times, some of which are “many months” long, yet none of the characters visibly change with time. It kind of reminded me a bit of Arslan, in some ways. I would have liked to see more about the mysterious race that guards the secrets to the mech engines as well. If you’re only kind of sorta into mecha like me and want something different, this is a great show just for you! 9/10

Koi to Uso Really should have dropped this one, but there was just a glimmer of hope now and then that this would actually have an ending. It didn’t though, and now I feel like I wasted six hours of my life. There wasn’t even any big reveal in the finale that would be a hook to get me to read the rest of the story, just “he loves both and well I guess that’s it.” I liked how genuinely awkward the protagonist was; these days in anime they’ll say the protagonist is weird, otaku, awkward, but then he’ll be the least nerdy of his friends, or “borderline weird”, which when he’s with his friends makes him look normal (see Hajimete no Gal), which defeats the purpose. The guy friend who was in love with the protagonist was really interesting, and it felt like they didn’t do enough to make it feel like he would ever actually confess. The show isn’t particularly funny or poignant either, it’s just kind of there. The thing I will remember most about this show is that it had a catchy opening theme. 4/10

Made in Abyss It’s a crying shame that this isn’t a 24 episode season; who knows how long it will be until a second season, though apparently it’s pretty likely to happen. Don’t let the cute characters and pleasant background masterpiece artwork full you; there is some pretty gnarly shit in this show, particularly Mitty, a formerly-human blob of body parts that is functionally immortal, despite her friend Nanachi’s best efforts to put her out of her misery. You get to see, fully on screen, how this 10 year old became a puddle of skin, or basically the eldritch version of a pokemon. It’s fucked up. I honestly had to look away. Still, it’s a great adventure show filled with real peril and very, very dire consequences. My favorite character was Ozen because of how creepy she is but also I love her voice, it stands out from every other voice in the show. 10/10 must watch

Nana Maru San Batsu I have participated in quiz bowl in the past, but it was never this hardcore, yet still managed to have the elitist bullshit attitudes, so I wasn’t too sure I was going to like this one. However, Mari Fukami and Akira Sonohara kept me around. It’s rare to see a girl in a setting like this that is shown to have earnest and ambition separate from revenge; sure, she wants to redeem quiz bowl for her brother so she can play him again, but in general she just really loves it and wants to be better at it. Akira is fantastic, I empathize with them (for the sake of brevity, gender neutral pronouns will be used) on a lot of levels when it comes to games. Whenever I play canasta with my family, they just want to play to the bottom of the draw pile, which, when you want to play multiple games, can take HOURS, so I started playing where I would keep all of my cards in my hand, and then “go out” all at once to end the round. They stopped asking me to play because of it, but it sure was fun to throw a wrench into things while still “playing the game”. Also, Akira is really cute, I really loved the side ponytail wig. ANYWAY, I had low expectations, but this turned out to be pretty good, though there were some points I was skimming through. 8/10

New Game!! Anime of the season. I just can’t get enough of these ladies and their interpersonal dynamics. While things were once again switched around from the manga, it still feels very much like its right off the page, and a lot of that has to do with the fact that Shoutarou Tokunou, the creator of the manga, sat in on script meetings and even wrote the script for some episodes! Which is pretty unheard of I think. He even started bringing a tablet with the script on it to make changes to the script on the fly. I’m really torn on the ending; they just about all but said Rin and Ko are lovers, which was actually more than what happened in the manga, but didn’t pull the trigger. I also feel like Ko leaving is a hell of a cliffhanger, especially considering the anime is basically caught up to the manga already. Tokunou has said that Ko’s time in France will be included in the next volume, so maybe in a couple years there could be a third season? That’s being greedy though; it got a second season, and I was already reading the manga before the anime so continuing to read it won’t be an issue. I just love them so much. 10/10 highest recommendation

Nobunaga no Shinobi: Ise Kanegasaki-hen Continues to be one of the better short form series I’ve ever seen. The comedy is always extremely clever and the historical accounts and the sarcastic take on such revered figures is always great to see. If you are interested in the time period or Nobunaga specifically but don’t take them too seriously you should really be already watching this. 9/10

Pokemon Sun & Moon I haven’t been this into Pokemon for a LOOONG time, and it is 100% to do with this series I think. It’s just so fun and energetic, there’s no world-ending threat (yet), the kids are all just hanging out and discovering new Pokemon stuff together. Lillie is of course the show stealer, and it would be great to see her travel as a full time companion with Ash eventually, since she essentially leaves at the end of Sun/Moon games to become a Pokemon master, just like Ash. I may have missed about 400 episodes of the series, but I don’t remember ever seeing any of the companions as like an apprentice to Ash, so that would be a new take for the series to use I think. I said Lillie steals the show, but Musahi/Jessie is still my number one gal; she is outstanding in this season, and is honestly becoming one of my favorite animated characters ever. Which covers a lot of ground. I know some people are down on the character design and over-exaggerated reactions, but I think, like the Sun/Moon games did for the game series, this was the breath of fresh air that the series needed to stay relevant. Continues!

Princess Principal The finale felt really flat/anticlimactic. They are definitely planning on a second season, or some way to extend the story like a game, which hurt it in my opinion by leaving too many things open-ended. Also seemed really hackneyed to have Princess and Ange just immediately back to lovey-dovey mode, despite Princess telling Ange to never let her see her again after a pretty hardcore betrayal. A begrudging thank you from Princess after being saved and a stern re-establishment of their relationship as mutually beneficial rather than romantic (or extremely platonic) that would build back up to it’s previous height in a continued story setting seems like it would have been a better choice. Best girl was Dorothy easily, for me. She seemed the most like a spy out of the whole group, and was kind of the Dick Grayson to Ange’s Batman; for raw ability she may be a bit behind Ange, but Dorothy has the heart and the willpower to really become a legend in the game, while holding the group together. Even though the show felt like it fell on it’s face at the end, the rest of it was crazy good, especially the episode where they confront the double agent and former classmate. 8/10

Teekyuu 9 Speechless. How do you describe perfection. Mandatory viewing. 10/10

Tenshi no 3P! Despite the pedo alarm sounding on nearly a weekly basis for this show, it ended up not being too bad. It was kind of like Ryo-Kyu-Bu but if all of the girls were professional level athletes already. To be able to play like that at age 7 or 8, and “not know what to do” with it seems really silly, but it’s more of a story about dragging the protag out of his room after becoming a shut-in from bullying. I feel like in the end the protag will end up with the age appropriate older sister, but then again I thought that way with Usagi Drop and Listen to Me Girls! I am Your Father! so who knows where this will go. Not to a second season, most likely. 6/10

Tsurezure Children I’m sure many people on tumblr were aware of this series without actually know the title, so it was nice to see it make the rounds every week with a decent amount of popularity. There’s not really one couple I would pin down as my favorite, it’s all just really clever gag writing that is couple with great visuals, another great short form series. 9/10

[thejpfdude-blog]

The Week in Anime (Week of 3/13/17)

Heyo and welcome to another version of TWiA! Sorry for the delay in posting this: my sleep schedule recently has not been kind, and I needed to sleep before the newest episode of LWA came out. But now I’m fine and awake, so here we go:

Rankings:

1 (0). Kobayashi-san Chi no Maid Dragon (8/10) [9/?]

2 (0). Kuzu no Honkai (8/10) [9/12]

3 (0). Kono Subarashii Sekai ni Shukufuku wo! 2 (7.5/10) [9/10]

4 (+2). Aggressive Retsuko (7/10) [46-47/?]

5 (0). Gabriel DropOut (7/10) [9/12]

6 (-2). Little Witch Academia (TV) (6/10) [10/25]

7 (0). Demi-chan wa Kataritai (6/10) [10/12]

8 (0). Nobunaga no Shinobi (6/10) [23/26]

9 (0). Sengoku Choujuu Giga: Otsu (5/10) [9/13]

10 (0). Nyanbo (3/10) [23/26]

Awards:

Most Science-y Episode of the Week: Demi-chan wa Kataritai

With a episode title like “The Dullahan Surpasses Space-Time”, I didn’t really know what to expect from this week. But what I did get was science. Or at least some attempt at it. I don’t study physics, especially of the quantum variety, but I knew something felt wrong with the science they were trying to explain. But even if it was sound in its reasoning, I just feel like devoting so much time towards an explanation like that is a bit boring, even to someone like me who likes science-y stuff. There was a part of me that was curious about the things the episode implored: what is the connection between the dullahan head and body? How does food that a dullahan eat end up in its body. But halfway through the explanation I just wanted the scene to be over. And other than that, the episode wasn’t anything special. Too bad, really; the show had potential. But now it’s not really anything special.

Most Surprising Realization Award: KonoSuba 2

That realization? That this show is almost over. Next week’s episode is its last episode, and I can’t really believe that. This whole arc hasn’t been as enjoyable as the rest of the series, but it’s still a bit unfortunate that there won’t be any more of this show (unless they somehow announce a season 3). Hopefully next week ends the current arc and the show off on a high note.

Most Static Show: Gabriel DropOut

For the first few weeks of the season, this show was a pleasant surprise. After a few more weeks, it’s been the exact same. And that’s a bad thing. Maybe it’s because I’m not a huge fan of the characters, but it feels like the episode just comes and goes. I’m not particularly entertained by the show, but it is a nice time waster. But it feels like same-old same-old with Gab being lazy, Vigne being the nice one, Raphi being the sadistic one, and Satania being the annoying chuuni one. I’m not expecting any great character development or anything, but I felt like a show like New Game was able to do what this couldn’t: keep my attention for the entire season. At this point of the season (almost over, wow), I’m losing interest in this show, and if the last few episodes keep this pace, it won’t be any fun. Something to look out for, I guess.

Best “Calm After the Storm” Award: Kuzu no Honkai

This episode and the one last week were pretty tame compared to the episodes before them. That’s not necessarily a bad thing: it shows that it doesn’t need to rely on constant “WTF”s to be able to portray its story. With the story wrapping up soon, I’m expecting something bad to happen given the calmness we’ve gotten though. Will Mugi succomb to Sensei’s temptations? Will Hanabi end up as a corrupted little individual? Will I stop asking questions? Find out next week I guess.

Best Episode of the Week Award: Kobayashi-san Chi no Maid Dragon

My goodness, this was all of the cute. I like Kanna as much as the next guy, but not that much to be honest. But this episode, she was on her top game. Disregarding Lucoa and Saikawa’s loli agehao, this episode was funny, cute, and heartwarming, all of which has been the norm for this show. With only a few episodes left, I’m hopeful that this show keeps it up, especially since they have a new character that they could add into the mix.

And that’s all for this week! Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you in the next post!