#despite that there is a lot id fix now

[ask-october-fox]

Halloween is getting closer! 🎃

[pastorpresent]

When the dust settled of what Wade dubbed their 'super awesome Madonna world saving sacrifice', (don't fucking ask, god knows Logan doesn't) the TVA had offered to hire their services to round up variants that incorrectly stumbled into their universe. With a fucking paycheck.

Logan had been trying (and failing) to find work for a few weeks by that point. It was sort of difficult when he had no tangible work history in this universe, with no references that could actually be called. Or a social security number. Or a bank account. Or any form of ID, really.

Wade had already quickly agreed on both their behalfs, and Logan got the feeling he just needed a valid excuse to put the suit on now and again between his monotonous shifts at the dealership.

The only catch was that they had to undergo a physical and mental health assessment before hand.

He'd passes the physical with flying colours. The mental one... not so much. They'd still 'hired' him, but when he was given a folder with information regarding each fucking problem he had mentally, they'd heavy implied he needed to work on it to keep his job.

His plan had been to chuck it in the trash, or burn the fucker, but it'd slipped his mind to do either by the time they'd gotten home because Wade started trying to cook pasta for dinner and almost set the entire place on fire, somehow.

He left it on the side and Wade, being the nosy fucker he was, had of course read it.

There was a lot of shit Logan expected to find in there - depression, ptsd, alcoholism... stuff he didn't exactly need some fancy fucking doctor to tell him he had. A six year old could probably glance his way and identify that he needed antidepressants.

The one that he'd thought was odd, and the one Wade seemed to latch onto, was 'touch deprivation'.

The thing was, Wade was a shithead. He practically made it his goal whenever he walked into a room to be the most annoying person in that room. Usually successfully.

But he was also... good. He was a good person, despite what people might say to him. He wanted to help him, which was... sweet, he supposed.

A lot of the stuff in there was a bit tricky to 'fix', probably requiring some sort of medication or therapy (Logan point blank refused both) but a couple of things, Wade seemed hellbent on helping him with.

There was never any liquor in their apartment, for starters. Whenever Logan would buy any, it would go mysteriously missing the following day. Al didn't even know it had been there, and Wade was a shit liar with his innocent little shrug when Logan would ask.

Ar first it pissed him off but, well, Wade was just trying to help, and he was - helping, that is. Logan was actually sober more than he was drunk these days - which hasn't happened in at least a decade.

The 'touch deprivation' was another Wade seemed hell bent on helping with.

The merc was already tactile with his friends. Logan had seen him drape an arm over their shoulder, side hug them as they walked somewhere, hug them goodbye.

It seemed he dialled it up to a thousand with him, though.

If they both happened to be in the kitchen, Wade was brushing up against him every few seconds, murmuring apologies as he all but pressed against him under the guise of trying to move somewhere or reach something.

When they were out, Wade would let their arms and hands brush up against each other. If Logan was pushing the cart in the store, Wade would 'accidently' rest his hand over his on the handle bar.

It was little stuff, things that somebody on the outside of them would probably not even notice, until one night on the couch.

They'd been running around for the TVA all day, and Logan was irritable and exhausted. He felt about ready to claw his own skin off out of general frustration, built up from a day of shitty, all over the place missions.

They'd both showered and were sat watching gossip girl, but he just couldn't settle. He was switching position every few seconds, growling under his breath every time his discomfort returned, and he must've been annoying the fuck out of Wade, he thought.

After maybe an hour - and Logan wasn't going to cry, but he damn sure felt like it, Wade sighed next to him.

Logan immediately found himself growing defensive, ready to argue that it wasn't his fucking fault his skin felt all tingly and wrong, and that the couch was too soft, or that there was a dumb ache in his chest that he didn't understand.

Wade didn't start arguing though. Instead, he lifted an arm in invitation.

Logan stared at him like he'd lost his fucking mind. How many hits to the head had he taken today? Could his regenerative abilities repair concussion or should Logan be taking him to a fucking hospital?

"Come on, peanut. Let me help," Wade said, which only confused Logan more. He didn't even know what was wrong- so how did Wade reckon he could fix it?

"I'm fine," he gritted out with a glare, trying to keep still to prove his point but fuck, his skin felt painful and tight.

"Alright," Wade held his hands up in surrender before letting them drop, turning back to the TV.

Logan watched him for a few seconds, then scoffed loudly, moving to lay a bit more on the arm rest.

It felt like it was digging into his ribs. He scratched his arm, barely resisting the urge to unsheathe his claws. He adjusted to lie back into the cushions. He sunk in too much, and the soft cushions felt like sandpaper against his on-fire skin.

Something dangerously close to a whimper escaped his lips, and he had to blink back a dampness building in his vision. Fuck, what the hell was wrong with him?

"Lo," he thought Wade had went back to focusing on the show, but apparently he'd been wrong, because the merc was staring at him with soft, concerned eyes, and Logan wanted to scream.

"What?" Logan snipped, but it was missing any of the intended edge.

"Let me try and help. No one else is here, it's just us - and if you don't like it, you can just sit back up," Wade lifted an arm again, an invitation for Logan to curl up against him and... it pissed him off how nice that sounded.

He hesitated for a few moments longer. Too long, really, and he expected Wade to rescind the offer entirely out of impatience.

He didn't. He just adjusted himself to be more sprawled back against the couch cushions, parting his legs a little and keeping his arm raised.

Logan made a defeated noise in the back of his throat, crawling closer. He hovered awkwardly between Wade's legs, unsure how to proceed, and Wade just gently pushed on his shoulders to get him to lie down, his head and upper torso covering Wade's chest and lower body.

He worried he'd be too heavy for Wade, but the younger man didn't seem bothered whatsoever. Perks of him being built pretty indestructible, probably.

"Good boy," he praised quietly, running his hand through Logan's hair. Essentially petting him, really, and Logan couldn't explain it but it's like everything in his head and everything with his body quietened down. He could breathe again, and he found himself going boneless against the younger man.

He wrapped his arms around Wade's torso, nuzzling into his stomach with a content sound, his eyes slipping shut as Wade continued to play with his hair, stroke over his back, brush fingers over his neck, calming the burn of his skin wherever they went.

It became a regular occurrence after that. Every night when they settled down to watch TV, Wade would wordlessly lift an arm, and Logan would wordlessly crawl over to lie against him. Sometimes they reversed it, because Logan discovered that having Wade lying atop of him felt incredibly grounding. Usually though, he'd be the one pressed up against the merc, tangled around him like some sort of extra clingy and extra heavy octopus. Wade would always 'pet' him, mumbling occasional praise as he ran gentle fingers over his body, scratching his scalp or dragging blunt nails over his back and arms.

Logan didn't realise how desperately he needed the touch until it was gone.

They'd been arguing all day. It was all stupid shit, really - moreso driven by the fact they hadn't had a mission in a while. Wade grew antsy if he'd been out of commission too long, and if he had to work so many back to back shifts at the dealership. And Logan grew irritable being stuck in the tiny apartment with no real purpose all day.

He'd went to the store and bought himself a bottle of whiskey to occupy his mind, to stop the thoughts of his old found family dead on the ground from a fight he could've aided in leaking into his brain.

Wade, as usual, had poured it down the drain. Something that, ordinarily, Logan would've been pissed about but let drop fairly quickly- because despite what others may think of him, his sort of almost sobriety did matter to him. It mattered to Wade too, which is why Logan never usually got all that mad at him for pouring perfectly good alcohol down the drain.

Maybe it was because of the irritation already brewing within them both, or maybe it was because Logan had really been relying on loosing himself in that bottle, but the argument quickly spiralled out of hand.

"You can't just pour out my shit, Wade!" Logan yelled, gesturing to the now empty bottle.

"Yeah, I'm being totally unreasonable. Next time I'll let you drink yourself into a stupor, pinky fucking promise!" Wade yelled back.

"You had no fucking right!"

"Do you think I want to, huh?! You think I just love having to control your alcohol intake like your some sixteen year old girl who discovered fucking smirnoff for the first time?!"

"Then fucking don't! I don't need you to do anything for me! I managed by myself for two hundred fucking years, I don't fucking need you, and I certainly don't fucking want you!" Logan shouted, probably loud enough that they'd get complaints from the neighbours later.

The ensuing silence felt even louder.

He regretted it immediately. He didn't mean it, and he knew that as soon as he'd said it. Because yeah, he might be able to survive by himself- but that's all it ever was. Fucking survival.

Wade showed him how to live.

He was still too angry to take any of it back, though. To admit he'd crossed a line.

"Fine. Do whatever the fuck you want, Logan," and Wade left, their bedroom door slamming echoing throughout the whole apartment.

They avoided each other for days. Even when they were together, there was silence. Wade didn't crack any of his usual jokes. They ate in silence. They stopped waking up tangled up in one another, and Wade no longer opened an arm in invitation when they were sharing the couch alone. No hand over hand on the cart, or arms brushing in the street, none of it.

Logan didn't give a shit, obviously. He bought ridiculous amounts of alcohol and drank until he passed out on their kitchen floor, waking up a few hours later cover in his own vomit and Mary Puppins peering at him curiously. Even the fucking dog was judging him.

It was the week mark, and Logan actually hadn't had a drink that day. Only because he had ran dry on money to buy any, and he'd considered stealing some but thought it wouldn't be worth losing his job with the TVA. He did maybe try drinking some of Al's nail polish remover, but he was halfway into the bottle when he realised she used the type that was fucking alcohol free.

Not his proudest moment.

His body already felt weary from the slight pulls of withdrawal when he sat on his end of the couch, purposefully not glancing Wade's way. It was very much like how he'd felt when he stopped drinking so much in this universe. The tiredness that ate down to his bones, the cravings niggling his brain constantly.

He already didn't feel great - but then the itching started, and it got intense fast.

His efforts to keep still were futile. It was so much worse than the first time around, and worse still because he knew what was missing, and it was his own fault he didn't have it anymore.

What the fuck was he supposed to say? 'Hey I know I said I didn't need you and to stop treating me like a child, but if you don't cuddle me right now I might fucking explode'.

No. He couldn't do that.

Everything hurt. He couldn't draw a breath in properly, and even the feeling of his clothes against his skin felt fucking wrong. Like it was too... light.

The final straw was when one of those tears welling in his eyes actually escaped, rolling down his cheek. He wiped at it harshly, and got up without another word, heading straight for their bedroom.

He couldn't let Wade see him like this. He was fucking pathetic.

He stripped down to his boxers, needing the stupid fabric to stop touching him, and got onto their bed. The covers felt scratchy, and he kicked them away with a growl. In the process of his aggressive attempts to find a comfortable position, he got a whiff of a familiar scent.

Wades. Wade's pillow smelt exactly like him.

It was the first time since the itching feeling started that he felt some sembelence of calm. His skin still burnt, but he could sort of zone it out for a moment.

He tried to turn away. To ignore it, because it was fucking stupid, but he didn't last long before he was grabbing the pillow and pulling it towards him, pressing his face into it and inhaling deeply.

He didn't remember when he started crying, but the pillow was soon wet with tears. He was so fucking stupid. Utterly fucking ridiculous - a grown ass man crying into a pillow because, what? He didn't have someone playing with his fucking hair?

He was so, so beyond furious at himself. At how ridiculous he was, and at how massively he'd managed to mess everything up.

Wade was good. He was bad. He should've known from the get go that he'd fuck it all up.

"Jesus, Logan," the soft gasp startled him from his thoughts abruptly, and he panicked. He sat up, shoving the pillow aside despite the fact Wade had seen exactly what he was doing.

Maybe he'd get lucky and one of those stupid ring portals would appear beneath him and send him elsewhere. Anywhere, really- he didn't care, it would be better than this.

"What?"

The biting tone wasn't all that effective when he had to scrub at his eyes to get rid of the tears.

It didn't even work anyway. They wouldn't fucking stop now that he'd let them start, and the fact Wade had caught him sitting there breathing in dredges of his scent while fucking crying - maybe part of it was just the utter humiliation of it all.

"Oh, Lo. It's alright," Wade murmured, and then he was shutting the door and crossing the room, climbing onto the bed.

He reached out, but seemed to hesitate, his arm dropping, "can I touch you?"

Logan only cried harder, his body practically vibrating, as if it was attempting to force him to move closer even unconsciously. He gave a jerky nod, "please."

Wade was on him in an instant, pulling him in so tight that to anyone without super strength and regenerating abilities, it would probably hurt.

Logan didn't care. He needed more. The fire was tamed, but it was still there, the embers tickling his body and threatening to overtake him again.

His hands tugged at the hem of Wade's shirt, seeking permission. He needed the stupid itchy fabric gone. The press of it was too soft and gentle. He needed skin. Needed something solid. Needed Wade, now.

"Shirt off?" Wade clarified, and Logan nodded where his head was tucked into the crook of his neck.

He hadn't accounted for the fact that they'd have to break their embrace to do it.

Wade tried to pull back, but Logan gasped, digging his nails in and keeping himself plastered to Wade's front.

"I'm not going anywhere, peanut. I'm just taking my clothes off, alright? I'm not leaving you, I swear," Wade put both hands on the side of his face, lifting it so he could look into his eyes as he spoke, the pad of his thumb wiping away his tears.

Logan reluctantly let go, shivering violently when everything hit him again.

Wade made quick work of stripping off his shirt and sweatpants, leaving him in his briefs. He lay down, and opened his arm.

Logan could've started crying again in relief. He all but dove at the younger man, burying his face away in his chest, wrapping his arms tight around him. Wade held him tightly, pulling him in enough so their bodies were pressed together solidly.

He lifted a hand and started stroking his hair, shushing him softly and rocking their bodies a little.

"I'm sorry. 'M so sorry, I didn't mean any of it," and ordinarily he might very been reluctant to say it, never being all that good at swallowing down his perceived pride, but it felt too important not to say.

Because despite everything, Wade had came in here to check on him. He could've just continued to watch TV. He could've so easily made fun of him for what he'd walked into, mocking how fucking stupid he was, and walked straight back out. He could've and should've done all of that, but he didn't. Because he was Wade, and he was good, and Logan would never fully understand what positivity he put out into the world to earn him.

"I know, me neither. Just calm down, Lo. It's all good now, I've got you," Wade assured, squeezing tighter, and Logan made a small satisfied sound, nosing at Wade's chest and then his neck, breathing in the familiar scent of his shampoo and body wash.

The itching had ceased, but he still felt like he needed more, like it wasn't enough until he sliced Wade open and crawled inside of him, curled up contently next to his beating heart, burrowed beneathe his ribs.

He didn't verbalise it, but Wade seemed to understand, as usual.

"On your back, baby," he directed, and Logan did so without complaint.

Wade moved with him, lying on top of him completely, tangling their legs together, a solid weight pressing him into the mattress, and ironically enough he finally felt like he could breathe again.

"Good boy. You're so good, peanut," Wade hummed, running fingers over his shoulders. Logan disagreed, but he was too out of it to really argue. He felt like he was floating on a cloud, hovering out of his body.

He didn't realise he was biting until Wade let out a soft sound above him, and the metallic taste filled his mouth.

"Fuck, sorry I... I didn't realise," he tried to move away, eyes wide, but Wade shushed him again, his expression something fond.

"Does it help?" Wade asked simply, and Logan swallowed. It did. It was... it was like Wade felt closer to him, somehow.

"Mhm, but don't wanna hurt you," he felt almost drunk, his words slurring a little as he watched the small wound on Wade's shoulder close up.

"I'll heal, angel. Have at it," Wade tilted his head in invitation, and Logan nosed at his neck for a moment, still not entirely sure, before sticking out the tip of his tongue and licking experimentally. He moaned softly at the taste of Wade on his taste buds, pressing his nose against his adams apple simultaneously to breathe him in. He let his teeth sink in lightly, nibbling at the sensitive area.

Wade groaned atop of him, and Logan went to pull away, but the merc held him there by the back of his head, "keep going. Please, Lo," and he sounded breathless and needy, and it made Logan growl with animalistic possessiveness, biting down a bit harder, blood running to the surface, which he quickly lapped up.

He couldn't really tell who connected lips first, he was fairly certain it was him, but it didn't really matter ultimately. They were high off one another, Wade grinding down while Logan rutted up, both of them rock solid against each other.

Logan bit at his lip, drawing blood before licking it away filthily, dragging his nails all over every surface of Wade he could reach. He needed him. He needed him so fucking badly. He wanted to worship every square inch of him then crawl beneathe his skin and make a home there.

He reached between them, wrapping a hand around Wade's length, but the merc caught his wrist, using the other hand to grip Logan's jaw and direct their eyes to meet.

"Logan," he knew vaguely that Wade wanted him to listen, but he was too busy whining beneathe him, pushing his hips up trying to chase the friction that every cell in his body was fucking screaming for. He didn't want to stop, and he didn't get why Wade was making him.

"Logan. Hey, eyes on me, peanut," Wade ordered firmly, and Logan finally reluctantly ceased his movements, blinking Wade's face into his focus.

"How are you feeling?"

And Logan huffed, glaring a little, because did Wade really stop what they were doing just to ask him that? Seriously?

"I'm fine," he replied shortly, trying to go for Wade's mouth again, but found himself held down by a hand against his bare chest.

"I'm going to need a bit more than that before we go any further, peanut. Especially with how upset you were just twenty minutes ago," Wade was stroking a hand through his hair again, and the calmness that filled his body from the touch was enough to get him to settle down just a little, sinking into the bed and giving up his valiant mission of jerking off against Wade's solid form.

"I just need to know you're okay, and I need to know you're doing this because you want it, not just because you feel like you need it."

"I want it. I want it a lot," he said after a few seconds, looking up at Wade. It was the most vulnerable he'd felt in forever, and all he could do was hope that Wade took that and handled it carefully.

Wade smiled, kissing Logan firmly. Logan gasped into it, letting his mouth open wider, inviting Wade in to explore as he pleased.

Wade pulled away suddenly, and Logan very almost ripped his head off of his shoulders in order to keep him close.

"Easy, boy. I'm just trying to sort you out," Wade explained with fingers teasing the waistband of his boxers.

It was ridiculous, but he wasn't certain he could handle the younger man's body weight leaving him. That press, being able to feel every inch of Wade against him, it was the only thing keeping him tethered in reality. He couldn't handle his skin setting alight again. Especially not when he had went a whole week without Wade's touch.

"Baby," and something about Wade calling him that made him want to crumble. Want to get onto his knees and suck him off and worship him like he deserved, because he must be a God- that's the only explanation as to how he can breathe a single word and make Logan unravel. Because he'd never been that. He'd never been anyone's 'baby', because no one ever bothered to be tender with him before. He was The Wolverine. He was supposed to be rough, and rugged, and maybe 'handsome', but never 'pretty'. Never 'baby'.

And yet everytime it rolled off of Wade's tongue it was so genuine, so sweet and caring, and it was almost like a permission slip for Logan to let the gruff exterior drop just for a minute, and be somebody's 'baby'. Be Wade's 'baby'.

"You don't want me to leave, peanut? You want me to stay on top of you?" Wade asked, because he was genuinely bothered by the idea of Logan not being one million percent happy with this experience.

Logan found his mouth and kissed him again. This one was gentle. So, so gentle. No blood or biting or back and forth - just a barely there press of lips. A thank you, sealed away in a kiss.

"Please," he answered quietly, speaking it into Wade's parted mouth, "I just... I need to know you're here, I think. I need to..." he trailed off, unsure how to finish.

How could he verbalise that he needed to feel him so completely, that he needed Wade everywhere all over him, all at once? How could he say that without scaring him away entirely?

Maybe that would be for the best, in all honesty. He couldn't be so damn reliant - not when Wade had a fucking life to live. A future to build. Why should he put that on hold just because Logan crash landed into his reality?

He should be going on dates with Vanessa right now, trying to fix things. Or hanging out with his actual friends. He should be doing a lot of things- but trying to fix something in Logan that had been irreparably smashed to pieces years ago was not one of them.

"I need- we need to stop," he spoke, even as every cell in his body was screaming no, fuck no.

Wade frowned, the hand that had been tracing over his arms pausing.

"What?"

"I can't. I can't do it. I can't."

He couldn't drag Wade down into the fucking abyss. He couldn't force him to live out his eternity like this.

"Okay, that's okay peanut. You want me to get off of you?" Wade offered, and Logan nodded.

It killed him, but he nodded.

Wade lifted up, manoeuvring onto the edge of the bed.

Logan wanted to throw up, that cold and empty feeling returning to his gut, spreading through all of his limbs like poison. 'This is good, Wade is good, you are bad' was like a mantra in his head, growing louder and louder until all Logan could hear was the rapid thumping of his own heart and those words, screamed, being etched across his organs like a warning.

Maybe the repeated frying of his brain was finally catching up to him.

"Logan, what's wrong?"

Logan wanted to tear his own fucking skin off.

"Did- was it too much? Did I go too far? I'm sorry, I just thought it's what you wanted," Wade was apologising, he was fucking apologising, and Logan was barely holding it the fuck together, his chest tightening.

"No. No, it's... I need to be alone," he choked on the last word, as if his body was physically fighting him from saying it.

Wade was looking at him with a small frown, reaching out for his hand resting on the mattress which Logan quickly moved away.

He'd never forget the look of hurt etched onto the others face. He might very well of tried to hide it, but he caught the flash of upset that filled Wade's features so intensely for just a moment.

"Of course. Yeah, sorry. I'll just," Wade gestured vaguely to the bedroom door before all but racing out of the room, the door clicking shut behind him.

Logan sighed shakily, curling up on himself and trying in vain to stop the tears coming.

Part 2 up now

[hayleymarriedjakurai]

mouthwashing x drdt

NOT a situation where im like "ok whit = daisuke" no. this is a different situation. their own scenario, trust. XF-Ture Express, despite its reputation for being one of the most reliable delivery services across the galaxy, has a terrible inside system. They have one of the lowest failure rates of the space freighters, being at a whopping 5% chance. Employees are paid a hefty amount, motivated by good working conditions on each ship with quality leisure activities and meal plans. But only the ones who earn it get such treatment. The hierarchy in which employees are forced to participate in never leaves the walls of the building. You do your job right and kill yourself working, you get assigned better ships with better shipments. It is as simple as that. So it is unfathomable when Captain Xander Matthews, considered one of the best, is assigned to a ship that is just barely allowed to launch. The "Fatebringer", is what it is called. It just scraped by inspection and is subpar for an XF-Ture ship, but supposedly it is necessary. Xander's job is not an easy one, but simple enough for someone of his caliber. He is to take this crappy ship, along with a shipment, to the exoplanet where the the better functioning ships are maintained and created. He and his crew will turn in this old junk ship for a sleek, modern one and move the shipment to it. Then on their way back, they will deliver it and return to Earth. Simple, they said. Child's play for a captain with so much experience. So it only makes sense for the best of the best to be assigned with him. Rose Lacroix. Her job is what is called 'the documenter'. She has no real purpose other than to keep track of supplies, as well as record daily minutes regarding every single thing that happens on board that is important to note. Due to her memory, she is considered the best to keep track of large quantities of items/the best to spot minor inconsistencies or things that are misplaced. She only needs to walk around a ship once to get it down properly. She has worked with Xander once before. Arturo Giles. The medic. He is apparently not new to this field despite being so young. He is usually quite unbearable and does not prefer to speak to his fellow employees, as most are deemed "too hideous". Despite his terrible personality, he is undeniably the best medic to have on a long assignment due to his quick efficiency. He claims that one day, the company will realize that he deserves better than what he has. (Despite being named the best medical employee.) He has worked with Rose twice, David once. J Moreno. The best mechanic for any ship, especially one as crap as the Fatebringer. When nothing needs to be fixed, she prefers to help out others if they need it (only if they deserve it, of course.) As much as she would prefer to stay on her own, she knows teamwork always comes first on long hauls. Her true identity is known to the company; they still put her actual name on all official documents and tech. She has to manually hide these things, as well as her ID card. Mariabella Rosales and XF-Ture collaborate a lot for financial purposes. She will advertise them with her existence/commercials/whatever, and they will pay her. And of course, never make J's employment public. If J weren't so good at what she does, they would not have cared. But they really like Mariabella's money so. As of now, Julia Rosales is considered MIA. David Chiem. Xander's co-pilot and good friend. David is usually the morale booster of his crews, always keeping spirits up and energy high despite the monotony of long hauls. He is usually who people will go to for advice or mental health discussions in place of the medic for two reasons: He cannot medically document anything, AND he is just such a fantastic listener! He always knows what to say! Xander and David have lost count of how many shipments they have done together. Teruko Tawaki. The stowaway of the Fatebringer who was not meant to be there. She was never meant to be there.

Teruko is usually assigned co-pilot. She has never worked with anyone else on the ship, so it is unclear whether or not her strange misfortune is known to any of them. Every ship she has ever been on has failed to bring their shipments on time- or at all. She has even seen crew members die in front of her. There have been near crashes, close calls...always when she is there. Nobody can terminate her. She has technically done nothing wrong, and firing her for no reason could mean a lawsuit or her spreading rumors about the company. So when Xander is given his assignment, he can only be dumbfounded when written in pen, he spots it. "Kill Teruko Tawaki. Find a way." And so Teruko is brought onto the ship, unconscious and hidden away. When she awakens, Xander will tell everyone that she is a surprise extra crew member. The excuse is that while she is usually co-piloting, XF-Ture is interested in having Teruko's skills expanded by having her shadowing the best of the best. Teruko, not remembering much, accepts this and trusts Xander. David's true personality is the same in canon: cold, cruel, manipulative. He feels threatened by Teruko's presence. After learning that her usual role is his, his theory is that she snuck onto the ship to prove she is better suited/to get him terminated. He treats her as normal UNTIL the crash. Xander is aware of Teruko's past jobs in vivid detail. He has been given reports, seen the documents...how much happens wherever she goes. He wants to get rid of her as soon as possible to keep the crew safe despite his guilt. Things go smoothly...until he receives word that XF-Ture is done for. It had only been two months, so what happened? The Rosales family suddenly stopped funding them, and everything crumbled after that. Nobody ever realized how much of their funding came from them. Xander felt mild relief. He truly does not want to kill a seemingly innocent woman for the company. After all, if she were truly responsible for any of those terrible things, they would have fired her with no hesitation. There must be a reason why she's still employed. But now they're all out of a job. What does that mean for them? Xander's mental health starts to plummet. Small things on board start to go wrong, and his first paranoid thought is to blame Teruko for being there. He becomes obsessed with reading over the reports from the crews that suffered in her presence. They were right; she's the cause. He confides in David, panicked and drained. Xander was a good man; far too good to kill anyone. Even if the people who told him to do so were technically no longer in charge of them...Teruko still needed to go. There's no reason to do the delivery, and there only thing they can really do is go to the exoplanet to swap out ships for a comfortable ride home. But with Teruko on board, there is no guarantee that they'll even get back to Earth. Xander tells him everything- too much. David decides that Teruko cannot make it back no matter what. Whatever field she gets to next will be riddled with destruction and possibly worse. Everyone here is at the top of XF-Ture, the best in a dead company. It is too late for any of them to climb to the top of another wage slave ladder. So he crashes the ship. Teruko Tawaki must die. If Xander cannot do it, he does not mind staining his filthy hands with more blood. What else happens? Who knows.

[wikiangela]

Hi, a bit late but joining in on the @alliwantforchristmasislou project 🫶

I decided to donate to a polish organisation called the stonewall group (which is why the pic is in polish lol)

chose this one just because im the most familiar with this one, and they do amazing work in support of lgbt+ people and fighting for our rights in this... not so queer-friendly country 🫶

now, ive been in the 911 fandom for almost 4 years now (gonna be 4 in i think February), and i only started after the episode Buck actually bc it was allll over my dash. i binged the whole show in a week, before the next episode is even aired, I loved it SO much.

as most of y'all know, I initially shipped buddie - it was the big ship, ofc i did, i wrote so much fic for them and i had so much fun and met so many moots i still love seeing on my dash 🫶❤️ but it might've been obvious (or not, idk) i was kinda getting bored and losing enjoyment, more and more of my fics and snippets were focusing on other characters with buck or eddie, i wasnt really as into it anymore - but i still loved it and wanted to enjoy it (which ironically was killed dead later on by the buddie fandom itself lmao)

and then came bucktommy and everything changed. initially i tried not to give in but within a few days i had two fics and more ideas lol they completely took over my thoughts. ive never been this inspired to write, to create, I even learned how to make gifs for them (with lots of help from amazing talented friends 🫶🤣) during fall and winter I always get so depressed and sad and having very dark and depressing thoughts (last year my buck driving fic was a result of that lol), and its so hard to find motivation to do anything, even write. but this year, even tho I had a lil crisis moment, i wrote through it and im as inspired as always - i havent stopped writing since april. they're literally the most inspiring ship ever - and fun fact, usually i prefer writing about fanon ships, so this was a huge change and surprise

I always related to buck a lot, and especially once we got his bisexuality canon - checking out and appreciating hot people of the same sex and not realizing what it means is too real lol - and Tommy is so compelling and theres so much potential for so many stories there, I wish the show would do something interesting with him 😭 despite being so confident and cool, he feels like he's holding back some sad, maybe (probably) traumatic backstory that could be so good and interesting - and lou is such a good actor and itd be amazing to see more from him in this role

they wrote tommy as the perfect love interest for buck, and it was amazing to see it on screen, it was such a breath of fresh air to see this kind of queer representation on a network show, it was so gentle and adorable, and they initially handled it with so much care, and id love to see where they'd go from there 😭 the break up broke my heart not only because it happened, but because it felt ooc and abrupt and not at all like that's where the story was going. wish they'd fix it and give us tommy back 😭🙏

and lastly but most importantly - thanks to bucktommy, i met so many amazing friends ❤️😭 even when I was writing fics and interacting with mutuals on here, i was never really talking to a lot of mutuals, not for longer than a few messages, and now i got this wonderful community that i feel so comfortable in, everyone is so nice and friendly, and I love y'all so much, this is the best fandom experience ive ever had ❤️

thank you all, ive been having so much fun since april, i love y'all. here's to more bucktommy in 2025 ❤️

[lurkiestvoid]

this is just my personal plan but I'll offer it

1) try very hard not to hand regressives more power in November

2) contact all my reps at all levels at least weekly to demand progressive policies and to comment on their voting records

3) push hard every single day to anyone who will listen about demanding national ranked choice voting and dismantling the electoral college

4) push hard to get more progressives in office at the midterms, and identify+promote candidates as early as possible

5) repeat 2-4 until successful, hopefully by the 28/32 elections

Like it's going to be hard work but it's very doable in 2-8 years, not so much in six months. The Tea Party did it in under a decade and it brought us Trump and his magats, but they're also trying to ban RCV (among a long list of other things) because they know they can't win without the EC.

TL;DR: we just hold the line for now, and then we keep pushing and keep protesting and keep petitioning and keep calling and keep writing and keep organizing until third parties have a significant representation in Congress and a genuine chance at the presidency

Is it me or does it seem like no one has a plan

Like both the skip the vote and the vote blue no matter who people are thinking less about what will benefit people and more on moral superiority

Like … I would like some direction please

[icarusredwings]

I rewatched Deadpool 2 and took notes.

Disclaimer: He's mentally ill and does mentally ill things (GASP, who would have thought?). Also, violence. A lot of violence. It's really long. Like.. really really long.

The very first words he says is "fuck wolverine"

Then blows his own head off with a shit ton of gasoline. Wonder if he had insurance on that appartment.

He started taking worldwide cases

He also admits to knowing "8th grade spanish"

"Passion of the christ. Then me." Says the man whos marvel jesus now.

I wonder how much wade owes cab guy.

Cab guy killed bandu Lmao

"What is it?"

"My IUD"

"A bomb??" Tell me why he was lowkey excited for it to be a bomb?

I love how serious he gets talking about how scared he is to be a dad.

This empire joke traveled from the first movie too.

"Pretty sure it doesn't work that way but we can try" yes.

When making toaster strudles its almost as if he could sense them coming despite it being so silent. This kind of makes me think that Logans not the only one who just jumps up sometimes.

This man really just said "Fuck it" jumped out of a 2 story window, BOLTED after this guy as fast as he could, got hit by a car, rammed another car, and whole ass hugged this guy before jumping in front of a truck with him. I don't want to see anyone try to tell me he's one sandwitch drop away from jumping off a cliff.

Cinatography by Blind Al.

Directed by one of those guys that killed john wicks dog.

God I love Ryan Reynolds because you know it was him.

Wade stop peeing your pants in public.

Weasel "We still have bowie..." Yeah id lie to him too at this point.

"Yeah im fine"

Fucked up

Insecure

Needy and

Emotional. Kübler ross apprently.

"Buck no more speaking lines for you" and he meant that shit.

Al is so humble and sweet. Making tea and giggling. Tries to shoot him and then just hears him collapse on the floor. How many times do you think he collapses on the floor a week? Just to be drimatic?

"Sweetheart can you speak up? Its a little hard to hear you with yhat pity dick in your mouth" Oh so shes his mom. Al is his fucking mom. Hands down. And the best one.

I love how he decided to do an entire bag of cocaine before dying. There was no reason for it and honestly was a waste of cocaine until you realize that these cocaine is wades whiskey. Shots dont work for him really, probably because hes already done it so much, but its the same way how Logan chugs that bottle before wade kidnaps him. Its easier to blame it on a substance then accept those were your actions.

Ness is so cute. The poster behind her has "I love you wade wilson" scratched into it. Its nice to know that his version of heaven is literally just a cozy Saturday morning with his wife.

Colossus just walking in to find wades body parts everywhere and put him in a bag like old dirty clothes lol

"Why cant I fucking die" tone was SO serious.

The fact that theres an x men rule book and its lowkey thicker then a bible. I bet you scott and Logan made 80% of those.

"That asshole was me" oh the tears. Baby boyy.

Wait isnt cable literally scotts son.

Im never going to understand this fucking time line jesus christ

Mutant rehabilitation?? What is he a drug addict? That kid is clearly in pain dipshits.

"X men trainee" is so funny

"Please stop cheating on me"

Daniel the pedophile looking ass

Bro casually signs ryan reynolds on the wolverine cereal box and then destroys his knee caps.

"Those guys hurt you??" It was at that moment, wade went ape shit.

Wade having fun in prison is so him. But come on imagine going to prison just for standing up to an abused child. Not to mention, His face when he immediately realizes how fucked he is and that "oh shit I actually DO have cancer now and it SUCKS"

Is it just me or does Cable reminds you of forge with all his cool fix it abilities. Or is he just futurey.

He didn't say were not friends to make him upset but to draw attention to himself. Him just eye rolling when stabbed in the hand was so funny too because he was like "Ouch. God damn it. Ducking OUCH."

Hes literally pleading with russel to find someone else to peotect him or hes gonna get molested because he cant do anything. His entire power is replacing dead cells WITH new cancer cells. His entire body is dying 24/7 but never fast enough to actually kill him, always regrowing way too quickly. Cancerous is better then dead.

"Get away from me kid" yeah cause he knows hes trouble and he REALLY doesn't wanna watch this kid die.

"Who the hell tries to kill a 14 year old boy"

"Kids give us a chance to be better then we used to be"

Dopinder is so wholesome. I love him so much. No i dont care that he killed a guy. Hes the type of friend you call to take to the movies or the zoo once every year and hes stoked just to be invited.

Peter: I just thought it looked fun :D

Dopinder: FUCK

Peter is that one dad whos kids left the nest and now he needs friends and a hobby so searches for the biggest weirdos he can find.

"Grab the boy- NOT INAPPROPRIATELY >:("

i love his crayon maps/plans

Oh my god weasel im not telling you anything ever again you snitch (same dude, cable is terrifying)

After crying over the love he has for his new team (x force) Wade confirms that he spent 10 years in special forces.

I love how supportive wade is with Peter despite him just being a normal dude only for him to immediately die LMAO

He just cassually lets his impulse win in which he steals a moped.

Oh i just noticed Dominos vitiligo. I always loved vitiligo charaters. Theyre so unique and barley ever given movie roles. Like why not?? Why wouldnt you want someone so beautiful? Im pretty sure she just has make up but it would be cool if not.

Something else is that cable just starts yeeting criminals out onto the street lol

"Theres nothing I cant kill" Let me intorduce you to the man whos on a constant road to dying but can never actually get there.

Im assuming cable wants to kill russel because he unleashes a big bad guy or something.

*cassually snaps neck back into place* Oh god that hurt!

Oh I was right! It was Juggernaut :)

Wade: *gets excited about being PHYSICALLY ripped in half*

"Rub my legs mama 🥺 I got growing pains"

"Oh noo! No no no Dp not again!" We love you Dopinder. Do not ever stop caring. "This shits happened before!?" Yes weasel. Sometimes your friends get ripped in half. Get used to it.

Wade just moves her gun to the right position.

Wade talking about saving russel is so serious that it makes you forget that he has a tiny baby ass rn. I couldn't make a deal with someone woth tiny baby legs... just... no. Not to mention that those baby legs are made of cancer.

"50 years from now you're super fucking dead"

Wade standing outside of the xmen mansion with his phone and a picture of a boom box playing music for Colossus to come outside and help him save russel is something i can see happening to Logan. They have a fight and he storms off to the mansion only for wade to stand outside like that.

"Hi Wade🎀✨️" "Hi Yukio!🥹 you guys make a super cute couple 😊 where was I? 🤨"

"So you wear a helmet so your brother cant read your mind?" "Yeaaahh" average kid conversations.

"Lets fuck some shit up is my legal middle name"

Okay sir edgelord.

Apprently wade has a gluten sensitivity

What is it with wade and metal men??? My man has a type.

"Im just gonna use this brick and maximum effort" Same wade. Same.

Yaayy!! Go yukio! Eveyone loves yukio.

"Thats how we do it in mother russia" What? Shoving an electrical cable up their ass and then put them in a pool? Damn. Ok.

That "I never should have never left you in that prison" with the hug? Man hed be a decent dad I think.

"Dont be ive been trying to make this happen for awhile" okay someone supervise him 24/7. Hes on the active watch list.

Wade: *is dying* Hi Yukio :D

Yukio: Hi wade :)

"R-dog" Oh my god hes too cute.

Them carrying the racist joke all the way til the end made me cringe but that was the point.

His last words being "do you wanna build a snow man?" Is such a deadpool thing.

I was NOT expecting to cry at the end of this stupid ass movie, AGAIN

"Dont fuck colossus" VANESSA KNEW

THE FUCKING COIN

"Is there a knife in my dick?" "There's a knife in your dick."

Oh I just didn't even notice she has heterochromancia! <3 Aahh!!

PFFT DOPINDERS SECOND CONFIRMED KILL

"WERE DEFINITELY NAMINF OUR KID CHER"

"Dont scratch!" *shoots himself 8 times* "Love you! Bye."

Wolverine: ???

[fae-morrigan]

hi! could you elaborate on the "jon beefs w batman" thing?? id love to read it, but i don't know much about comics so i wouldn't know where to look :(

IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED ABOUT THIS BECAUSE ITS LITERALLY THE FUNNIEST THING IN THE WORLD TO ME.

So, the series that introduces this is largely Son Of Kal El. It's Jon's big 18 issue solo book, its super fun, there are gay people, there is dismantling a colonialist government. More specifically the Beef Inciting Incident begins issue 10, takes up most of issue 11.

So, Jon's dating Jay Nakamura. Cool guy, refugee from Gamorra (place that is colonized that theyre trying to fix), independent journalist known as The Truth. He works closely with this group named the Revolutionaries.

Super cool, right? Jon's having a golden time.

Then, Lois pisses off Lex (long story but its equally hilarious), bad enough they're worried about the family's safety. So, Batman shows up to whisk them to the safe house.... but Jay's not allowed to come.

Jon's pretty miffed about this, and then Batman decides to be Batman and drops THIS bombshell:

We get his reasoning the next chapter: Jay's buddies, the Revolutionaries? Yeah, well, lets say they believe in DIRECT action. They've killed a lot of people (Pssst, you can read more about it in Suicide Squad: Bad Blood, which is one of my favorite books).

Jon does not buy what Bruce is selling. He argues with Batman about it, DESPITE NOT KNOWING WHETHER OR NOT BATMAN IS WRONG, because the idea of BRUCE telling him who and who not to make out with is SO EXISTENTIALLY INFURIATING that he just. Straight up runs off.

Now, this gets resolved pretty quickly. Pa tells Bruce to knock it off because he's not exactly better in love, in a great scene that is one of my favorites from the book. Jon talks to Nightwing, then talks to Jay, and Jay is like, "yeah. They are kind of violent extremists, but they were also the only people who helped me when I was fleeing systematic medical torture and ethnic cleansing, so." We don't really get Jon's thoughts on this, but he ACTIVELY works with them in the finale with the stipulation they don't kill anyone, so we can kind of assume that even if he's not down with them murdering people, he's DOWN down with their Liberation politics. Which is neat!

... But Jon holds a grudge against Batman. Big time. Like, seriously. We really see it up close in Adventures of Superman: Jon Kent, where he's just... Dude. This isn't even YOUR batman.

^ Like, I think we all know he's referencing what happened with Jay here. Its VERY on the nose.

Even Injustice!Bruce is like "Dude, I literally just met you".

Like, seriously. Not even his Batman. Just batman-shaped. And he's catching CONSTANT strays from Jon. Its a whole thing. Before that moment, Jon and Bruce were actually quite chill: Jon even made him tea during the SOKE annual! Up until that point, Bruce was kind of just "damian's scary dad". Ever since That Exact Moment where Bruce was like, 'your boyfriend is a terrorist,' Jon has been like:

[seventeenlovesthree]

What it means to be "chosen" - burden, fate, acceptance

This is not going to be a full analysis on the whereabouts of why and how "The Chosen One" trope is being executed in the Digimon Adventure series, because frankly... The lines have pretty much been blurred throughout the different iterations. Even the question of why some children in particular were chosen has been answered differently depending on which source material and which person you'll ask - and thus, there are different interpretations out there. Whether it's because of their potential (in regards to certain attributes, the subject of friendship or in general) shall not be discussed in full, but let's say... The very first Chosen Ones were chosen out of necessity, even if chance may have been involved.

If you ask me personally, the main premise one can and should take away from all of it actually boils down to a cheesy quote from the dub version of the first Pokémon movie: "I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant; it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are."

Replace "birth" and "life" with "Chosen Child status" and it fits again - regardless of what characters you apply it to. The only difference here is - that they may not refer to it as a "gift". Because this is something they all handle differently, depending on what version you look at, once more. So I wanted to make a little, very inoffical ranking on how the status is being perceived by all of them. Keep in mind that, by the end of 02, you could say that ALL of them have accepted it as a part of their lives, some more willingly than others, but the general tone is the same:

"Being chosen is nothing special and yet we all understand that there is a necessity, that we have a duty to fulfill."

After characters like Sora or Yamato had already questioned being chosen in Adventure, Ken was the first character that challenged the idea of it being a "burden created by chance".

"It could have been anyone but me, so why was I chosen, why did I have to suffer and get punished?"

This theme is being explored in similar yet different ways through the protagonists of the later movies - Meiko (and Maki), Menoa and Rui all represent tragic figures in a somewhat twisted "game of chance", used by higher forces. We know that the number of Chosen Children doubled each year - whether due to Homeostasis meddling mingled with Rui's wish shall not be subject of this post, but overall, we can say: They all received the "gift" of partnerships. However, neither of them were meant to last, due to different circumstances. Which includes Ken as well - because once corrupted or unable to fulfill a certain "duty" any longer, all these partnerships were (sometimes temporarily, sometimes permanently) ripped apart.

Long story short, for the sake of the following ranking, I will include Tri onwards for completion sake - however, it's just a temporary state, because "Adventure Beyond" may fix some of these views.

Rejects it as a burden (temporarily): Sora

This one is, sadly, quite self-explanatory due to the current state of Sora being "out of the loop". She had been among those who initially (Adventure) fell into despair due to the burden of having to save the world - and while she temporarily accepted it (02), it all played into her trauma of not knowing who she was and how to define herself outside of "labels that were externally assigned to her". So yes, despite her clearly loving her partner... We shall wait and see how she will deal with this in the future.

Ambilvalent, had to get through several stages of contemplation, but overall knows it's part of who they are (still ongoing): Yamato & Taichi, Miyako & Iori

These two "groups" are here for different reasons. The entirety of the Adventure-verse spends a lot of time telling us how torn Taichi and Yamato are basically all the time - they're more than willing to save the world whenever it's required, but struggle with the "Chosen Child identity" and what it means for them as "normal people". Because as strongest fighters, they know they shoulder a lot of responsibility, for themselves, their friends and families, but also for the worlds out there. Fighting yet causing sacrifices when they themselves still have to deal with heavy childhood trauma not only causes them to clash, but also to (subconsciously) reject their duties, hence causing their partnerships to (temporarily) vanish. Which is very similar to the tragic figures talked above - which is also why they all suffer from depression, fear of abandonment and identity crises. They're perfectly aware of the duty and see it as a necessity they HAVE TOO choose for themselves in order to succeed. But the latter is a lesson they had to learn the hard way first - while also remembering how important their partners (and this kind of life) really are to them, because it's literally all there inside themselves. They just have to discover it again.

Miyako and Iori are a bit harder to decipher - they used to struggle strongly with the idea of having to make sacrifices due to their Chosen Child status and I would argue that this is still something that, if they think about it for too long, keeps them up at night. But I would still put them on the outer part of this scale - for the simple fact that they were able to integrate their partnerships into their daily lives. There may absolutely be times when they see it as a chore and annoying - but begrudgingly accept it due to the bond they share with their partners and friends.

Accepts it after coming to terms with it, transforms it positively: Hikari & Takeru, Jyou, Mimi & Ken

The viewer doesn't spend as much time with these two when it comes to how they define themselves. Hikari and Takeru, similarly to their brothers, can be assumed to be aware of their special status among the group. They're the enabling angels - and know that's why they could never quit. On the other hand, despite suffering from childhood and family-related trauma that causes them to fear darkness and separation, they seem to learn not to see it as a "burden" in itself. Unlike their siblings, they have an easier time integrating their partners into their daily lives - maybe because they hadn't been separated for as long, maybe it's because they perceive it differently due to their ages and being surrounded by people who also make it look easy. They are aware of the responsibility - and despite their strong opinions on injustice, they're still able to see the gift in it all.

Jyou, Mimi and Ken are purposefully separated from everyone, due to the fact that they were all at a point in their lives at least ONCE where they were about to quit it all for good - but eventually learned that it was something about themselves they couldn't change. Something they had to live with, if they wanted or not, even if they were ALL heavily affected by watching beloved people/mons die. Mimi loathed the idea of fighting and causing unnecessary death, Jyou repeatedly asked himself why he couldn't just live a normal life aside from outside expectations - but unlike Sora or Taichi, they actively embraced the idea that there were things only they were capable of that nobody else could. This seems to be in contrast to the idea that "being chosen is nothing special" - but these two were capable of making it work in a more casual, less spectacular way and, just like the likes of Miyako, Iori, Takeru and Hikari, were able to keep their partners as active parts of their private and/or career lives all around.

And so was Ken! Ken's journey is that of repentance, wanting to make up for what he did in the past, even if it meant sacrificing himself for that. He could easily have collapsed under that burden - if he hadn't had the right people to surround himself with, showing him that he was valuable despite his wrongdoings. And it feels like - Ken learned that lesson so thoroughly that, even though one can be sure that he still suffers from nightmares as an adult, he's also capable of helping others (just like Rui) to understand that message.

These three chose to embrace it eventually, even if there were temporary doubts.

Embraces it as part of their lives without question: Daisuke & Koushirou

I'm not saying that Daisuke WASN'T having temporary doubts of whether or not he was worthy enough to carry a digivice or even the goggles at first - but he also turned out to be the one who just "winged it" all eventually, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. For him, having a partner, being chosen, meant just that - it didn't make him any more or less special than any other person on the planet with aspirations, goals or all the various life paths. Sure, he may have been flabbergasted and in awe at first, but in the end, meeting V-mon was nothing more than getting another brother AND having the ability to be badass and doing the best he could while saving the world. Despite his mask of self-importance, who knows him also knows that he's down to earth like that and just accepts it all how it is as a side gig to getting his Ramen business going.

Koushirou may be a little bit less casual about it, but for him, being chosen isn't a burden or fate or any magically connected miracle - it is a part of his identity. Yes, he may have been just as irritated by File Island and being surrounded by weird monsters as everyone else was - but he was basically the first one who just questioned it all because he simply wanted to figure it out, NOT because it was a chore. Yes, he may look exasperated at times after having helped to support saving the world(s) countless times, but for him, that is his life. He has committed himself to researching the whereabouts of the Digital World, his tech company is primarily aimed at creating gadgets to support his friends and that serve the initial cause - and his partner is basically with him 24/7 anyway.

[prof-peach]

Hisui Chapter 2

guys. im doing a lot of planning and such rn, and let me just say im so incredibly glad i get to tell this story. I know the games been out forever now, i know were all bored of PLA, but I told myself i'd finish this project and i will. the next 3-4 years will be soley dedicated to it due to life changes, so hopefully the process will smooth out, but it is still just a one woman show, and i still gotta take on other work rn to pay bills, so i cant put the time into the Electus comic like id love to, YET.

I am however very emotional about the development of it all. I cant wait to share Peach's backstory in full detail, I cant wait for you all to see that first pannel where here real name is uttered and the terror hits her, or the moment she goes to do something so utterly stupid out of sheer gut reaction and ends up in a pickle. This story is so much about the little details, the things that we all love about the pokemon world, she'll teach Rei and in turn teach us the readers some cool facts. We will get blood shed, and drama and tears and treachery, and we get to do it all the while experiencing a woman learning to recover from a lifetime of trauma piled onto her shoulders.

we get to see her open up to people when she would never have before. We get peak Val and Peach content, them at their utter finest and truly lowest! we get to walk through memories, see what happened, and see how those moemnts shaped her.

I feel so passionate about showing a character who fails, who gets knocked down, who messes up, is human, makes mistakes, countless, stupid mistakes, and despite that, despite how many times she fails she doesnt quit, and thats what makes Peach who she is really. Tenacity, enduring, and despite her initial rage, she even learns patience.

idk, i just have strong opinions on this one, i wish i could gush about it all day long honestly, this adult take on a kids game makes me happy, and i get to fix the mistakes the creators made with PLA.

[fandomwritingbit]

Battered and Bruised pt.2

William Afton x (fem) employee reader

synop: It's your first shift back after the clusterfuck that was last time, but it's not ever going to be smooth sailing.

warnings: bad language, inappropriate relationships, violence, and the joys of customer service.

link to pt.1 - here.

Henry pulled some strings for you, moved your rota around so that you had a few days off post the ‘incident’, which you are thankful for. You kept yourself in your flat, only leaving to do a food shop which was bad enough with all the looks you received. The bruising on your face seemed to be taking it's time in clearing up and your arm was no where near fixed, though at least you can hide that.

It's an odd feeling to be off work knowing the trouble you caused, but still, when you’re putting your work uniform on an odd sense of relief washes over you. Finally, some normality and some delicious social interaction, both of which you’re in dire need of. 

...

The walk to work was nicely familiar and by the time you’re breezing through the back door to the club you’re whistling under your breath. You make it to the staff area, after having said hello to nearly everyone on shift, and chuck your bag in your locker, turning the lock and sliding the key into your pocket. Then you head for the offices to find your manager and your role for the night. A large part of you is hoping it's William you’ll catch first though you don’t really know why. Maybe you want to apologise, maybe you just want to see if he looks more banged up than you. It isn’t though, rather it’s Henry that you meet the moment you enter the corridor. 

“Hiya, Henry.” You greet him chipper enough, but that same part of you is a little disappointed. 

He smiles at you and runs his eyes over your form in the sleazy way he normally does. “Hey, sweetheart. You’re looking much better since the last time I saw you. You feeling better?” He’s standing next to you in a heartbeat, a little too close to be appropriate and it pulls your lips into a small smile. 

You narrow your brows at the question, you weren’t exactly off sick, you just had some scrapes, so you’re pretty much feeling exactly the fucking same. Despite that thought, you keep your words pleasant, “Yeah, thanks. Glad to be back if I’m honest.” 

Your boss looks more than a bit surprised by that, no one is ever glad to be here. “Good good.” He says, like you keeping his true thoughts to himself. “Now, I was hoping to try you on the door tonight… but if you’re not up for it that’s okay.” 

Your eyes go wide with hesitation but sensing that you don’t really have a choice you go for, “No, I’m happy to give it a go.”

… 

Now, when you said that you did assume that you’d have a buddy with you. Preferably one of the big scary guys, but no. No, you’re standing at the entrance to the club on your lonesome, with a tin of pepper spray on your hip and a metal detecting wand in your hands. To Henry’s credit, he did give you some instructions before pissing off, something along the lines of ‘Scan them, if they have anything that can hurt someone; bag it and tag it. ID people who look under 25. If they give you lip, send them away.” It sounds alright, it’s relatively inside your skill set but like all customer service roles it’s never going to be as simple as it sounds. 

To be fair, most people were decent, happy enough to let you scan them, telling you that the beeping is their belt or a risque piercing, whichever applies. You had some kiddos mouthing off when you ask for ID, half the group is just 18 and one of them has the shoddiest fake ID you’ve ever seen, so you send the lot of them packing. Apart from that, the shift was going well… until it wasn’t.

It wasn’t overly busy after midnight, it tends to be a quiet spell until 1 or 2am when people flock from other establishments, so you’re enjoying the break. The only thing you’d change was having your cigarettes in your pocket rather than languishing in your locker. It’s as you’re thinking about how nice a smoke would be right now that a couple walks over to you. Mid twenties you’d guess; a lady looking brilliant in a figure-hugging white dress and a bloke wearing an armani shirt you’ve seen at least four times tonight already. Something about the swagger of that man told you he was going to be a twat long before he stood in front of you. 

“Hi, you alright?” You greet the two, pleasant but firm as you’ve learnt tends to work best here. 

The lad nods in acknowledgement and the woman smiles, there’s a restlessness in her stance that shows how eager she is to get inside and have a good time. 

“Right, if it’s okay, I’m going to give yous a quick scan. Just for security, you know.” You explain whilst gesturing with the wand, the words are becoming very natural off your tongue after saying them for the umpteenth time. “If you’ve got anything metal in your pockets you can pop it on the side.” Spiel over, you gesture to the metallic slab beside you and the woman puts her handbag on there, the man sighs before overdramatically reaching into his pocket and pulling out his wallet, phone and rather disturbingly, a swiss army knife, all placed noisily on the surface. 

You frown automatically, here we go. Not commencing with the scan, you address the gentleman, “Right. Unfortunately, I can’t let you go in with the uh knife. But I’m happy to put it in a bag for you and take your name so you can grab it on the way out?” 

You expected this guy to complain, maybe make a bit of a fuss but eventually agree or simply piss off out your sight. Instead the man scoffed before bluntly saying, “It’s not a knife.” 

It’s this moment William chooses to step outside for a fag, well, that’s what he told Henry. Truth be told he nearly hit the ceiling when he was told you’re on door duty, on your own, with no fucking training. So he was popping out for a look, to see how you’re getting on. What he wanted to see was this couple going inside after a moment’s chat, instead he seems to be witnessing some kind of standoff. 

Visibally buffering, you try to understand what the fuck that’s supposed to mean, ‘It’s not a knife’, you blink uncertainly before taking it upon yourself to explain again. You point at the weapon, “You can’t take the knife inside.” 

Rolling his eyes, the man snatches the object from the surface, flicking it open with angry theatrics. It’s enough for William to come over, face instantly stern. “It’s not a fucking knife. It’s a comb and nail file for fuck’s sake.” The man says, the complaint spat at you and you stare dumbfounded. Yes, there is a comb and file on it. But this prick neglects to mention the fuck-off blade glinting in the low light. You glance at your boss ,then at the woman, as if to say, ‘are yous hearing this?’ The latter looks increasingly mortified and your boss looks irritated.  

“Listen, mate.” You try to be cordial but a disbelieving chuckle escapes you, “I’m not worried you’re going to go in there and open a fucking beauticians, okay? That is a weapon and they are prohibited from this club.” How many times does this guy need to hear the same thing, you internally question, hoping that the tall imposing presence of your boss would let the words sink in his thick skull. 

The bloke flicks his eyes to the new presence, the grave expression on William’s face is seemingly enough to make him resign. He shoves the knife in his pocket again, before grabbing the rest of his belongings on the surface. Muttering under his breath the whole time, “Fucking ridiculous. Stupid fucking-” He gives you a venemous look, forcing you to hold back the amusement that was tugging at your lips, before turning to his date, “Don’t just stand there, come on then, we’ll go somewhere else.” 

The woman frowns at being snapped at, and that’s enough for you to want to ruin this bastard’s night completely. So you put your attention on the lady, “You don’t have to go, love.” You grin at the way the man freezes in your peripheral vision, doubling down on your plan. “There's a good crowd in there, good music tonight… In fact, to make up for all this trouble, why don’t you go in there and tell Carlo on the bar that I sent you, get your first drink on me.” 

At the word ‘trouble’ you nod towards her date and it makes the lady smile. She takes a moment to think about it, before glancing at the man and simply saying, “Sorry, Jay. I can’t refuse that.” You step back and grab the door for the lady to go inside, she thanks you under her breath and you hope you’ve saved her a night of pain. 

You flash the guy a somewhat mean smirk, and send him on his way with, “Have a good night, mate.” He lingers for a second taut with indignation before walking away in a huff. 

When he’s a great distance away you turn to William with raised eyebrows. “As if it took you here for him to get the message, ridiculous.” 

Your boss sniggers, finally getting about lighting the cigarette he came out here for. He can’t stop himself from smirking a fair bit, there’s something about you that is inherently funny, a true lack of giving a shit that drips off all your actions. Still snickering he says, “You make a habit of stealing people’s girls?”

That has you smiling, “Only when they’re complete arseholes. I’d take her home to prove the point.” You look at him nonchalantly, a glint in your eye suggesting that you're only half joking. 

Though he’s amused, something about the casual delivery of that makes arousal lay her hot hands on him. It’s inappropriate and he lightly chides himself for it, but the internal disapproval is outweighed by wondering why the image of you and that lass together has almost instantly given him a semi. He’s not complaining, but it’s odd.

The silence is short but unable to sit in it you pipe up. “Are you out here checking I haven't started another fight, then?” You watch the man to see if any trace of that handsome smirk remains, but his face is unreadable as he takes a drag of his cigarette. The exhaled smoke in front of you has your fingers tapping against your side, that stalemate must’ve stressed you out more than you initially thought. 

“Pretty much.” He says stoically, the dryness of the words making your grin freeze awkwardly on your face. He must register that because he continues, the words more mumbled than before, “Henry having you out here on your own makes a certain word spring to mind, one of my least favourite fucking words.” 

Okay, you’ll bite. “And what’s that?” 

William can’t help the crooked smile that spreads, unwanted, across his face. “Negligence.” 

You're glad of your blameless status in that, but can’t resist standing up for yourself and your other boss. Or more likely, you can’t resist poking a little more. “Maybe he just thinks I’m capable.” 

Smoke leaves him as he snickers, “Capable or not doesn’t matter. Daft fuck has no idea what it’s like to stand out here talking to angry pissheads all night.”

You smile, fingers still rhythmic and frequent against your thigh. That confirms one of your suspicions, your employers are like chalk and cheese and one of them definitely only seems to be concerned with the lighthearted side of running a club. The other seems to be a bit too wrapped up in the heavy side of it though. The two owners’ dynamic is all the talk of the lowly employees like you and you must admit, it’s entertaining as hell. 

A silence comes over the two of you and you struggle to think of anything to say to fill it over your growing need for a smoke, stoked beyond belief by the man beside you. He notices your agitation and the restless movement of your hands, his attention fully on your body language, searching for any inclination as to why you’re on edge. 

Feeling his gaze, you’re pushed to explain yourself, “I wasn’t going to ask but uh- is there any chance I can borrow a cig?” All blasé-ness is dropped and you ask honestly. 

William raises his eyebrows at you and for a brief moment you feel stupid for even having the nerve to ask. How unprofessional. But he puts you at rest. “Yeah, alright.” He reaches for his pocket where a box of fags must be stowed away, and you smile, remembering the old adage of don’t ask don’t get, you’ve been quoted at since you were a kid. 

The box is crumpled with use, the fold dog-eared, clearly always in and out the man’s pocket, your own look very similar. He hands you the cigarette through a pinched finger and thumb and you’re more than glad to take it. 

“Thanks, William. Really thanks.” You flash a self-deprecating smile, quickly putting the instrument between your lips, leaving your hand open for the lighter you assume he’s going to pass you. Instead, your boss brings the lighter to you, opting to light it for you. It forces you to step a little closer to him to meet him halfway, it’s a bit personal and it pushes your mind back to the last time you were in his space, the lack of pain on his face when you cleaned up his injuries making your core tense. 

He catches a flame on the first flick of the rollerball, something you can never bloody do, and you thank him again as the end flickers into life. They’re cheap cigs but it’s exactly what you need. William watches you draw on the cigarette, you make it look good, too good really; god there’s something wrong with him tonight.   

So to distract himself he asks, “How’s your arm?”

“Same as my face.” You grin, “Fading but still there.” Your delivery is riddled with self-consciousness,  but at least you’re still smiling, that’s all you can do after all.

The cigarette sits between your lips as you roll your sleeve up to show your boss the damage. Not nearly as bad as it was the day of, but the wicked scratches still make him frown, what a wanker that guy was, he hopes the man is still bed-bound. That’s the thing about fighting, even if you’re relatively okay, the evidence of it is written on your skin and the shame is often enough to keep you away from others. William is still wearing the proof of his role now, but at least he doesn’t have to explain it to his ex-wife anymore.

“It looks much better.” Your boss pulls his gaze off your arm to see that mischievous look on your face. 

“Yeah.” You pause for a second, weighing up if you’re really about to say the thought banging around in your head, you shouldn’t but yeah, yeah you’re going to. You gesture to the injuries on his face, the dulling bruises and the scabbed over split brow fighting for dominance, “You’re looking better too… maybe don’t hang around here though, you’ll be scaring people away.” 

Your risk pays off because his facade cracks, “Charming.” A small smile finds its way on his face and he shakes his head, he must be going soft because if anyone else had said that to him he certainly wouldn’t be smiling. 

Unable to resist explaining yourself, you continue, “I’m only kidding, you know you wear it well.” You probably shouldn’t have said that, you’re all but saying that you think he’s fit, and true or not it’s not really a good thing to say to your boss. This is proved by him catching your gaze, a stern look back on his face which makes your body go rigid, yep you should not have said that. 

A heavy beat of silence washes over the two of you, his poker face is too good, you’ve no idea if you’ve pissed him off or not so you just bite your tongue. 

Which was probably for the best, if you’d continued down that line, he has no idea what he’d have done.

William eventually puts an end to the awkwardness, flicking his dog-end down on the floor, snuffing it out with his shoe. "I'm going to get someone out here with you, hopefully it'll keep the knobheads in check."

You give him a wry smile, "Yeah, that's probably for the best."

He nods in response, already moving past you to go through the main entrance, a sudden urge seizes hold of you and you stick your hand out to catch the crook of his arm. Your boss's head flicks around quick, judgement heavy in the way he's looking at you.

"Here." You take a moment to really think about your phrasing here, you want to reflect how genuine you really are. "I just want to make sure that you know I'm grateful for you stepping in the other night."

His brows raise briefly, "I know. You said thank you. A lot." His words are so dry you have no idea if he's happy or angry about what happens. You just can't get an accurate reading.

You laugh uncertainly, muttering, "Yeah but you haven't said if I'm welcome to it or not."

He hears, and before slipping inside tilts his head down a little. "I haven't decided if you are yet."

[reco-obsessed]

do u have any super awesome reko hcs ?? id like to hear yr thoughts :3

*cracks knuckles*

most of my ideas on her are based on canon, so ive never considered them outlandish enough to call headcanons, but i guess technically pretty much all of my rants about her could be sorted as such, since they try to build on what we already know and extrapolate an analysis. i have too many to list. ill try to compile some here, though. longer ones are under the cut.

i moreso stole this headcanon then made it but i agree that reko cant cook for shit. she lives off takeout and stuff she burnt in the microwave, much to her protective older brother's dismay.

i believe reko was putting on her makeup and styling her hair every morning in chapter 2. again, i stole this one.

i think reko would be really good at video games

reko would be very good at ice skating

despite being good at drawing her eyeliner, i dont think she can draw very well on paper.

reko paints her nails sometimes (she likes the smell) but its always chipped somehow, even if she just painted them.

she doesnt have an extensive (if any) skin care routine (thats more her brothers thing) but she does have a hair care routine after almost frying off all her hair several times trying to bleach it herself. she only dyes her bangs now but she still takes good care of her hair (especially with the way she has to style it everyday).

reko is either out of the bathroom in 2 seconds or she takes an hour because she gets distracted and starts messing with her hair or makeup. it used to drive alice crazy when they both lived with their parents. not now alice, you can go shit in the bushes, reko is using her eyeliner as face paint.

reko tries not to do this when shes working on new songs, but shes the type of person who almost always listening to some kind of music. she loves finding new music and new subgenres.

shes not really a messy person but shes not very neat, either. she usually has trash slowly building up somewhere. nothing 15 minutes of panic cleaning cant fix, but its there.

i think reko made / makes a lot of her own punk clothes and accessories, and generally has frugal habits around her style. it started when she was a teen because her rebelliousness and delinquency led to her being perpetually grounded, so no allowance. shes awful at customer service so she couldnt really get an entry level job. her music wasnt really marketable and she probably didnt have her own band in her younger teens ( i think samurai yaiba was probably only started when she was about to or already graduated high school) so there wasnt much if any income from there. she may have done some odd jobs but they didnt pay much and she was intimidating to people, so it was hard to get gigs. all this led to her getting good at sewing, dying, bleaching and otherwise making her own clothes. probably owns a bunch of pins, studs, and zippers in bulk just to sew onto stuff. i think the same thing applies to her make up- she uses fancier water / sweat proof on stage, but off stage? dollar store eyeliner and foundation. she doesnt care about the risks, she goes through her make up too fast to bother with the fancy stuff.

reko has an impressive memory generally, but when she struggles with it, she makes little songs or rhymes to help her remember (she did this to sometimes help her speed memorize for tests in school. then, she had to whisper-sing it under her breath and swing her foot to the beat and itd be all you could hear in the test room, and shed either get in trouble or just be really embarrassed).

speaking of school, i dont think reko went to college or post secondary school; in ytts theres a whole thing about her hating school. but aside from that, the timing would be really tight. shes canonically 23, samurai yaiba was 2 1/2 years ago, so she wouldve been 20-21, and you graduate high school at 18. i cant say i know a lot about japanese college, but if it has the same status of degrees as in the US, it wouldnt really make sense for her to have gone to college- she was likely a drop out or never went in the first place.

i think reko has some burner account(s) where she dumps experimental music. its not always avant garde, but she likes playing with different genres. the problem is they keep escaping containment, even though shes embarrassed by them and thinks theyre all shit. no one can know about her breakcore album with 6 million views that she made while she was drunk and garage band crashed halfway through so theres weird chunks missing and distorted audio. no one. no one can know about the ska music made. god, not the ska.

reko has theater kid energy to me (both the yabusames do), but i doubt she was ever in any productions. her band/orchestra vibes are stronger and thats probably what she wouldve devoted all her time to instead. maybe, like, one musical, but she mightve not gotten the role she wanted and immediately quit. if she was, she drove everyone up a wall cause she was so hard to work with. shes a natural but she never shows up to any practices and is so easy to piss off, especially during the acting portions. skipping practice isnt a big deal to her because she can memorize things quickly, but it screws all the other actors up. she just isnt a team player (or rather, reko really wasnt a team player in highschool).

reko is a caffeine addict. she has overworking tendencies and i (used to) headcanon her as someone who abstains from alcohol / drugs / etc, so she resorts to coffee instead.

speaking of- i used to strongly believe reko wouldnt be the type to smoke or drink, specifically because i misinterpreted a line she said about her father ('hes not the best at staying true to his convictions, and gives into temptation') as being about addiction, when it was probably just supposed to be about her dad giving into the temptation of trying to make reko famous. looking back on it, thats closer to canon, and with the stress of being in the spotlight at such an early age and her self described 'delinquent phase' it makes a lot of sense to headcanon her as being a smoker or using other stimulants. i still think that you could possibly interpret her dad as having started doing those things at some point once they had surplus money from rekos early career, and i like the details that adds to her character; her trying to rebel from the industry not just out of a growing hate for it from being forced to do it, but also a wake up call for her father and hoping maybe hell stop if she refuses to be an idol anymore. her partially being so high strung later on because she never lets herself off the hook or resorts to substances that could calm her down.

i strongly believe reko has no idea how to actually be friends with people. like, yeah, when you talk to her during discussions she holds conversation pretty well and its not as if people dont want to be her friend or even that shes bad at it- its just that she has no experience. she doesnt know what shes doing. during pretty much the entirety of her developmental years, she was either getting forced into music stuff she didnt wanna do by her father or doing the music stuff she did wanna do. probably the only people she hung out with, if at all, were people she could hop the fence with to skip, and they werent really friends. alice even states himself that she had a habit of pushing people away and was alone.

in the same vein, alice may have dated more people than his far more charismatic sister. i refuse to drop this headcanon because its funny as hell. alice comes off strong, which you think would be a deterrent, but a lot of people are into that. its not as if reko doesnt, herself, but.... she has to deal with sheeping and girls thinking theyre just friends on top of that. moreover, i dont see reko as a flirty person- a lot of side content involves her getting flustered in some way. reko has an awkward flustered streak and it doesnt come out often but when it does it comes out strong, and its easy to find if you know where to look, so to speak. i mean, did you see the way she talked to nao on the 2f landing?

okay, i could keep going, but i ill spare you and stop here. thanks for letting me yap. or, rather, thanks for being my victim. if youve got stockholm syndrome, feel free to ask me for a part 2.

[starstaxis]

@fragilehiggs

HOW TO IMPORT HIGGS 3D MODEL INTO BLENDER / MODELS FROM GAMES INTO BLENDER

figured id make this a post because it’d be easier.. might help other people too!!! on how to put higgs into blender. you probably know some of the stuff i’m gonna explain but for good measure will bring up. this is extremely long because its the sort of thing i wouldve massively appreciated but i unfortunately instead basically had to figure it out going off of little to nothing

—

blender is a 3d program that allows you to import models from games into there which can then be rigged, posed, and animated. people take these models from games using programs called ninjaripper or greyhound. essentially this just goes into the files of the game and takes out the assets. if it’s an asset, it can be taken out. you would then have to rig the model yourself (basically put a skeleton to pose it.) this takes very long and is inconvenient.

luckily, people do this for you. you don’t need to rip your own assets out and rig, which is a hassle and you usually need to pay for these useful programs. a great spot for getting models that have been ripped from games is deviantart. however, there is no telling how these models can perform. they could be badly rigged, or could have messed up textures. unfortunately, such is the case for the one and only higgs model… https://www.deviantart.com/kanbara914/art/Death-Stranding-Higgs-XPS-864224744

the good news is that i fixed the textures. the bad news is that the rigging is absolutely beyond busy. he is poseable, yes, but the amount of points there are makes it really hard to. i’m yet to figure out a better way and might start ripping and rigging my own models. despite having fixed the textures i am unsure if i can export the fixed version. thus.. another tutorial will come through on to do that. unfortunately it takes awhile. all of this requires lots of patience, trial, and error.

so, now, how exactly do we start? FIRSTLY, we need to revisit downloading blender. the current up-to-date blender will NOT work. you need to download blender 2.80, NOT anything else. well, how do you get an older version?

in order to get an older version, navigate to blender.org/download/previous-versions/ and scroll down a bit to you see ‘download any blender version.’ here is a good tutorial but i believe that it is a little outdated so i will explain it furthermore. https://youtu.be/WmlijP9D67o?si=QHhpOQ_D_0LWJP9M this is the one i followed however so, the premise is the same.

we click on download any blender version and it looks quite overwhelming. dont be too worried, you just need to look closely and scroll till you see Blender2.80 . we then click on that and you need to find your operating system. im going to assume you run windows, and if so, pick blender-2.80-windows64.zip from the list.

navigate to your files, and then open up the zip file that you just downloaded. click blender 2.8 again and then what you see is going to look a little busy. dont be fooled, its actually not. just scroll down and find blender.exe. press this and itll bring up a simple process -- all you should have to do is press a few buttons and optimize it like any other download for an application such as blender. it should be installed like regular blender, and if its not on your desktop, simply go to blender.exe in your files in applications. i recommend pinning it to your taskbar.

here comes the next step. there is something called xnalara. i will keep the history of it rather brief but its quite interesting. xnalara was an older program that allowed people back then to rip models from games and import them into the xnalara program. that program is rather old and i rather not use it, however, im thinking about looking into it. its good to use blender regardless because of its studio-accredited attributes. its professional.

some awesome dude later down the line created something called a xnalara add-on for blender. this allowed you to download models ripped from games posted on deviantart that are optimized for xnalara. the file name for these xnalara optimized models end in .xps . these will not regularly be imported into blender, because it doesnt support it. however, this add-on will allow you to do such.

im going to explain how to download it but watching this video regardless is essential. you will probably need to go back to it now and then.

since youre particularly interested in importing higgs, i will keep it relatively broad but touch on his model a bit more because i am more familiar but this process applies to most models. navigate to https://www.deviantart.com/kanbara914/art/Death-Stranding-Higgs-XPS-864224744 and scroll down into the description of the post. click on the link, mega.nz/file/y88wyQpS#eDkcsSmW… so on and so forth. it will ask you if you want to leave deviantart and click the link again to go there.

you're now in MEGA. this website will allow you to store downloads for people, and i can assure you its safe. i would never download anything im not sure of -- my PC is my baby lol. look down to the bottom right and youll see "SAVE" and "SAVE TO MEGA." pick save. it will download, and you need to look to the top right and click where your downloads are. this will take a couple minutes, grab some water and a snack. when its done, click on it in the tray to open it.

youre going to be overwhelmed by everything you see. do not fret! just close it, dont unzip it. just make sure it exists. you can close MEGA and deviantart now. you now need to refer to the video i linked if you want to follow along with more resources. we need to install the XNALARA add-on for blender 2.80 which can allow us to put it into blender.

before i continue i want to say, being familiar will blender as a whole will be an insane help. unfortunately the only way i figured out some of the stuff that i did was because i knew how to just going off of the program. most tutorials will not have answers for this small issues... but i most likely do especially for this specific model.

here is the add-on. https://github.com/johnzero7/XNALaraMesh . github will look relatively the same as it does in the video. look to your right, youre going to see a bolded 'releases', and under it, XPSTools v2.0.2 or something along the lines of that. you dont need to see the other releases, it's best to have the latest one. click on it.

its going to open up the description of the file. the above is important to note because it says it works with the blender that you just downloaded. if there are any issues for whatever reason with using blender 2.80 (approximately the version from ~2020) those are other versions which are applicable. for the sake of my sanity im gonna explain how to open it in blender 2.80 .

go down to the bolded 'assets'. under it you will see 3 links -- click on the first one which ends in .zip . it will download in the download tray. if your computer tries to flag it or anything as unsafe, click away from that and allow it anyways. this program has been used by thousands for years. it will soon finish downloading. MAKE SURE THE XNALARA ADD ON IS SAVED ON YOUR DESKTOP!!!

go ahead and open up blender 2.80 now. if you have the newest blender installed already make sure youre picking the older version. it will open a terminal alongside of blender, while its running. dont close it. click general.

if you have never used blender, please watch a video on the basics such as this one. https://youtu.be/Z8sg0nHNTTo?si=zjR4aBHVF8XX_Qdn this is the only way to realistically be able to attempt messing with said model, unfortunately. unironically, rendering roblox avatars was a huge stepping stone and aid to my experience with this. i genuinely recommend you do it before you try and do something like this. here is an amazing, step-by-step tutorial that needs no explaining out of the video. https://youtu.be/kpALOtLhX-Q?si=4UrhkBTIK5qYOBfS

from here, this is a much better tutorial to follow >> https://youtu.be/8mqUqob3P3o?si=14a50v88IPZx6O8Y . find yourself at the time stamp of 1:46, the previous is the steps you have already done. go back to blender if you have made it this far, lmao. click on the cube and delete that motherfucker.

look at the top toolbar. it says things like file, edit, render, window, etc. you want to pick edit and scroll to preferences. youll see many options but youre going to want to click add-ons on the left. then, at the top left, click install. go to DESKTOP and click XNALaraMesh.2.02.zip and click install add-on from file on the top right. make sure its the ZIP. this is gonna bring you to a menu with potentially many other downloads. scroll down till you see XNALARA if so. MAKE SURE IT HAS A CLICKED CHECK MARK ON THE LEFT.

go down to the three bars on the bottom left and make sure to save preferences. you can then close that and go back to blender. it will now be one of your downloaded add-ons available! go to the top left again and hit file, import, and XNALARA / XPS. itll hover and youll see another option. make sure to pick XNALara/XPS Model (ascii./.mesh/.xps) . click it and pick Load an XNALara model file.

this will open up your file explorer within blender. click desktop and click on the higgs model you saved earlier. clicking it will lead to 2 files, click xps.xps . press Import in the top right. it will take a hot minute to pull everything into blender, be patient. once its imported scroll inwards and look at the son of a bitch. the rig is gonna be highlighted orange and hes gonna be gray. click to anywhere other than the model and face the enemy.

due to the shading settings, his textures arent showing. simply go to the top left where you see 4 ish circles, the second one should be selected. select the one to its right, viewport shading, and give it a second to load his textures in. its gonna look nothing like him. youre gonna have to fix the textures, brave soldier.

--

will post another tutorial if you decide to go through with this or if anyone does because unpacking all of that is such a pain in the ass but i promise it isnt rocket science. just not gonna do it if it isnt asked for because i spent 3 hours figuring out how to fix it the first time i imported his model -- the creator says nothing about this on the download or how to fix it unfortunately and its quite janky :(

if you even made it this far in reading, congratulations, youre a winner. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS AT ALL PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ASK and i will answer them to the best of my ability.

SAVE THE IMPORTED MODEL TO REVISIT!!!!!!

[moon-thething]

Yo it's me Kevin Anon again—you can answer this if ya feel like it and what not

But I had a more light-hearted ides for a Kevin x Reader lmao

Kevin with a reader who admires him on an almost child-like level and praises him a lot despite him obviously finding them annoying and not really wanting them around, and reader usually doesn't get that he doesn't like them because they're too stuck finding him "cool" to really comprehend that. But despite how annoying they can be, Kevin begins to slowly fall for them (because he's moron-sexual /j) and when he realizes it, he goes into denial because he can't believe he might like them of all people.

- Kevin Anon

I got so happy when I saw you left a request ngl

And yes, I absolutely love this

Also, sorry this took so long! I totally forgot I had this in my drafts!

Romantic or platonic?: Romantic

Readers gender: Neutral

Type: Fluff

¡Warning!: Not proof read, also probably cringe

------------

Kevin

Let's set the scene first, aka explain how you two actually met

You met through a close friend (Streber)

It was just a normal day for you and Kevin, but you both received a text from Streber saying he wanted to introduce all his friends to each other

He told you all to meet up at some place that isn't that important to the plot rn

You, being sort of weirded out by his actions since you already knew everyone, just decided to go along with his evil scheme

It doesn't matter if you arrived first or if you arrived last, your first interaction with Kevin was pretty chill

I imagine that Kevin must have done something cool to impress you and to make you start drooling over him (hypothetically that is)

It probably wasn't that impressive, but hey, it's what got your attention 🤷‍♀️

You were just walking around town with the group + Kevin. You didn't really have a destination you wanted to go to, just walking, nothing wrong with that (you got kicked out of a cafe for being too loud)

It was so sudden. A cat had landed in front of you, causing you to stop. But, since you were going at a quick-ish pace, you lost balance. You were trying to just grab onto something, but it lead to your phone falling from your grasp

Kevin was the first one to take notice and he was quick to grab you and your phone. He tumbled back a little, the noise finally seemed to catch the groups attention and they turned around only to see you and Kevin

"What happened?!" Streber yelled before anyone else could

"I think Y/n tripped on something." Kevin sighed, pulling you up to stand instead of him holding you, "You have to be more careful." He muttered in annoyance

You were too awestruck to even catch his annoyed tone, only nodding as you let out a hum of agreement

You focused more on Kevin for the rest of the hangout. Just chatting with him and asking him questions

It was weird, to Kevin at least. But he shrugged it off, thinking you just wanted to get closer after he saved your ass from spending who knows how much money on fixing your phone

But what really got him confused was when you continued talking to him after that day

I mean- he just saved your phone! It's not like he stopped world hunger or something

But that little action he did seemed to really stick with you, thinking it was sweet of him to save you from falling (delulu)

Kevin could've swore he lost braincells whenever you were around, it only got worse when you found out where he worked at

Each interaction you had with him just seemed to make him more and more sick of you

Until one day, where one little thing made his heart flutter a little

The candy clubs doors opened with a familiar ring, signifying that a customer has walked in

"Kevin!" Kevin scrunched up his face in annoyance, letting in a deep breath before turning towards you

"What do you want, Y/n?" He asks, his gaze catching a bax in your hands. What were you planning now?

"Oh, well I remember you mentioning that you were getting annoyed with the uncomfortable textures of clothes. And Streber mentioned that your birthday is in a couple of weeks. So I decided to give you an early birthday present, since it's kind of depressing to see you wearing the same hoodie over and over again." You laughed lightly, setting the box on the counter

Kevin raised a brow before opening the box. His eyes widened slightly as he saw two sweaters in the box, including what looks like to be... A bracelet?

"I added the bracelet for extra flare." You spoke up, laughing as you read the words on the bracelet, it was a little nickname that the group collectively have Kevin, "I made it myself.. If that means anything." You laugh awkwardly

Kevin only stared at the sweater in the box in awe, picking one up to get a better look. It was a plain one colored sweater, you remember hearing Kevin complain that he couldnt find a single non-tacky sweater, and the extra hour of you seeing the printed logo was totally wort it. Also, the sweater felt like heaven underneath Kevin's hands, the more he held it the more relaxed he felt

He put down the sweater looking at you with awe, the anger he previously felt suddenly dissapearing

"Thank you, Y/n" He said, giving you a kind, genuine smile. You smiled back

"It was nothing really, it just took a while to find everything..." The next words that came out of your mouth seemed muffled to Kevin. The only thing he was focused on was the perfect curvature of you face, how your lips moved as the voice that he previously viewed as annoying sounded more angelic to him. His heart fluttering as he felt like he was going to puke with all of the thoughts running through his head

He was definitely in denile for a while before he finally accepted his feelings for you

He could not look you in the eye, all of the emotions hitting him at once when he even glanced over at you. Don't even get me started when he accidentally brushes hands with you, or god forbid you hug him

He is totally embarrassed of his newfound feeling since he ranted to Streber how annoying you were

With all of his complaining it lead to Streber keeping the two of you away. Which was a relief on his behalf, he didn't have to be so tense anymore

But the relief quickly turned into fear, fear that Streber was gonna say that you annoyed Kevin and that you would stop with your acts

My mans was stressed

He was on a late night call with Streber, not being able to sleep and knowing Streber barely ever slept as well

And on that call was when Kevin finally accepted his feelings for you and told Streber

Streber was overjoyed, already planning in his head on how you two were going to interact more and how those interactions were going to lead to your guyses first date

And, with that information, whenever he started calling group hangouts he made sure both of you would be as close to each other as possible. Leading to Kevin giving him death glares

But hey! It all turned out great in the end!

Your childish behavior only led to Kevin falling harder of you and eventually blurting out that he has a crush on you

And it was so random too! You were just gossiping with him, as Streber had led you to Kevin to tell him all of the gossip, and he just blurted out how beautiful/handsome/amazing you are

You stopped mid talking to look at him, pure shock on your face. It took Kevin a few moments to realize when he said, and he was apologizing for it

You told him it was okay and after his embarrassment has faded he confessed. He was 100% ready to shrivle away, that's until you told him you liked him too

Overal, very wholesome. Also he felt really bad about hating y97 and didn't want to tell you when you two started dating 👍

[halfacowboy]

Once i started viewing victor as a 'came back wrongly grotesque despite the seemingly 'good' effect he had on the community' kinda way things started making a lot more sense.

He's turned into a parasite that picked off the weakest in society and made them His. They are just as dead as he is. The shortcut through recovery and healing he gives them is cheating the natural forces of the world and to an outsider it seems like a no-brainer kinda deal. Become mellower and calmer in exchange for no pain and a purpose (bettering the world and minimizing suffering) But the material used to fix them is themselves. What makes them their own individual person. Victor is the patient zero of a zombie virus and i think im gonna have to plant myself firmly in the Jayce Defender category on this one.

AND ALSO ON JAYCE. he was touched by the arcane in a way that let him keep his id. He fought the battle that victor lost (because he died before it began) and he sees Victor for the husk that he actually is. He's stopping the puppeteering of the vessel of a person he loves. Because Victor is not even a corpse yet. His death has been delayed because of Jayces own selfish actions and the thing in victor now isn't victor. Because victor would never make someone as dependent on him as this new thing is so 'generously' doing. He knows Victor well enough to see what he isn't.

Anyways this is just word vomit and I'm gonna go sit in a corner for a while.

[marley-manson]

Finally watched the Xena finale, thanks to the fanon episode order treating it as a midseason soft finale that gets fixed by When Fates Collide lol.

And man, it really was a hot mess. I could barely follow the plot, and many aspects were very arbitrary and like, revealed off-screen. The most hilarious of course being Xena suddenly announcing, like a minute before the end of the episode, that oh actually apparently she has to stay dead, sorry Gab, xoxo

It is VERY Xena though to have a plotline where Xena anticlimactically dies in the pre-credits scene at the beginning of part 2 and both you and the characters assume for the rest of the episode that she's going to come back to life like usual until the tragic twist lol.

Akemi was... resoundingly mediocre as one of Xena's exes. Her only personality traits were 'proto-Gabrielle' and 'wants to kill her dad.' Also like... was there incest subtext there? Like it was implied that the little creepy afterlife she was in was like, her dad's ghosts' personal brothel or something? But like I said, the plot was very hard to follow.

The themes were also a mess of course, it's been said many times but yeah ignoring the central theme of the show (atonement is pointless if you're doing good now) in favour of redemption thru death was dumb, the set up was dumb (we're blaming Xena for 40k deaths because she set a couple dudes on fire in self defense? Man at least give me an actual deliberate atrocity here), and choosing death over Gabrielle was like a dumb reverse Ides of March. Also Gabrielle just going like, 'damn okay I guess, bye forever,' was unbelievable. Even if Xena wants to backslide, I'm pretty sure Gabrielle would force her to come back to life anyway, fuck those souls. Like, it's not even clear how Xena's death helps them? Killing Akemi's evil dad again freed them from torment or whatever, who cares if they don't get avenged? What is a state of grace? How will they be lost, if she comes back to life? People go unavenged all the time, deal with it.

That said, I'd been under the impression that somehow Xena's death here contradicts the whole reincarnation thing, but I didn't get that at all? Idt there's any stipulation that she has to stay in the Japanese afterlife, just that she has to be killed and stay dead, and it does make sense since in their next lives Xena is a lot older than Gabrielle, so she should logically die a few decades earlier.

On the more positive side of things, it was very fun to see Gabrielle shining as ~the new Xena~ Love to see her kicking that one dude's ass twice, and the moment she catches the chakram is super cool. The non-Xena chakram-catch has always been framed as an 'oh shit, this woman's gonna be hardcore as hell' moment in the show so I love that they use it to show how far Gab's come.

And of course, gay gay gay homosexual gay. Like, season 6 is the point where I would say it is textual if only the show didn't go out of its way to scream "IT'S STILL AMBIGUOUS" a couple times lol (reporter's question in You Are There, fans in Soul Possession saying "yay Xena and Gabrielle are finally together" when they hear Harry and Mattie are married, eg.) "If I only had thirty seconds to live, this is how I'd want to spend them: looking into your eyes. I love you, Gabrielle." Like goddamn. I appreciate this cast and crew so much. Plus the incredibly thinly veiled makeout scene <3

Finally, while I think her chatting with Xena at the very end was meant to be more metaphorical or symbolic rather than literally Gabrielle talking to herself, it was an unfortunately funny image and a pretty terrible final scene imo. I do like the 'I hear they're in need of a girl with a chakram' reprise though, I gotta admit. Go kick some ass babe <3

And despite very much not liking that Xena dies in the finale, I would still read/watch the shit out of Gabrielle's now-single adventures as a just-as-invincible gay hero, kicking ass, fucking women without ever settling down with anyone, telling stories about Xena and becoming even more famous herself.

[v-anrouge]

Addressing and apologizing for the mistreatment and harassment i caused for @twstchatterbox

Long post under cut.

i’ve recently reached out to someone i have hurt a lot continuously due to my own selfishness; Rubia. i’d like to apologize to her. to make things brief we dated a system's alters and would all talk to each other multiple times a day because of it. Everything seemed to be going fine until one day Rubia reached out to me with a text warning me about the fact she'd be taking a mental health break due to her social battery being low, of course seeing that my first thought was panic and that surely ive done something terrible, despite her attempts to assure me that it wasn't the case. i blocked her because seeing her hurt me, and i was convinced i was right in the situation, and that Rubia was some heartless monster. i have gone out of my way for about two years now to spread rumors about her, participated in a hate club, went out of my way to ruin her friendships and isolate her, I was ruining her social life and it made me happy. It doesn't matter how I feel anymore because this is all my fault and I was disgusting.

I know i already sent you an apology but ill gladly do it again, even if you do not forgive me, because it's a totally understandable thing to do. Back when this happened all i could think of was myself, how sad i was how hurt i was and looking back on it i really feel just disgusted with myself and how i dared play victim when your note clearly showed you were not okay mentally, instead of being a good friend and wishing you a good recovery, i immediately treated you like you had betrayed me and completely disregarded everything you told me in that note. None of what happened was your fault, clearly if i had been cut off it was because i was also doing damage, and instead of apologizing i decided to treat you rudely, and i really truly do regret my actions. It's even more disgusting to take in the fact i continuously painted you as a terrible person when i check the way i answered to you reaching out and trying to be friends again, instead of asking for an explanation instead.

In the server i was in had two people who also constantly insulted and painted Rubia as a monster, one of them being the person she considered her internet little sibling at the time; hikaru and the other one is our ex, which id rather not mention. In that server we'd constantly talk about Rubia in a negative way that only served to make us dehumanize her even more, it started at first with simple venting made by hikaru because of the way they felt betrayed and hurt by being abandoned when they genuinely considered themselves siblings, then i joined in where we'd blame and insult Rubia for cutting us off completely ignoring the reasoning behind her decision, the system, who created the server then joined in, at first only expressing how they felt rubia didn't see them as a system but rather just as the alter she dated, painting their relationship as abusive and saying Rubia was causing the alter to almost go dormant. with our constant slander i only started to hate and see rubia in an even more negative light, which only made the way i talked about her with my friends worse. In these almost two years, ive demonized rubia in many ways, all because i was desperate to seem valid, ive hurt her in ways i know i will never be able to make up for, and any backlash i receive for this is more than deserved. Im posting publicly with her permission and supervision both out of respect for her, but also so you all can see the type of person i am, you can all feel free to block me and cut me off if you see fit, it was my own actions that brought this after all. And to Rubia; i know no matter how many times i say this that it'll never fix the ways i hurt your social life, but im truly sorry, i hope that one day you're able to get help and heal from the damage i've caused.